#i had not heard of them but i do not doubt it

[barcaatthemoon]

friend of the bride || lia walti x reader ||

You hook up with Lia at your best friend's wedding.

MINORS DNI, 18+, Smut warning.

You knew about Lia. You had never played against Lia, but you knew all about her. It was your job to know about football, both international and domestic. She hadn't played in the NWSL, but you were a pretty big Arsenal fan even before she had joined up. But even before then, you had heard people in the business talking about the Swiss player.

It made sense that she'd be in the bridal party. Lia was Ana's best friend, and maid of honor. In a way, you thought it was wild that the two of you weren't better acquainted. Obviously you understood Ana being hesitant about introducing the two of you. You were a bit of a womanizer to say the least, even if you had settled down quite a bit since starting your gig as an official NWSL commentator.

"Excuse me, I don't know if we know each other. I'm (Y/n)." You could feel Ana's eyes on you as you approached Lia. There weren't many people that made you nervous, but your best friend's new wife was definitely one of them. The two of you had been teammates years ago whenever Ana played on the Thorns, and maybe, just maybe, you had seen a spark all those years ago.

Nothing had ever come of it, and you were happier because of it. Ana was cool, and she definitely would have hated you whenever you transferred across the country at the end of the year. You weren't a native to New Jersey, but Rutgers had offered you a full ride, so you counted yourself as a bit of a Jersey girl. Sky Blue wasn't perfect by any means, but it was definitely the place that you had wanted to retire playing for.

"I'm Lia, and no, we haven't been properly introduced," she said. She outstretched her hand, and you took the offering. Behind you, you could practically feel Ana attempting to burn holes into the back of your head to deter you. "My friend is watching us."

"If I'm being honest, I don't blame her. She's heard stories of how I can be at weddings." Bashful wasn't something that normally worked well with you, but Lia found the blush cute. It became obvious as she patted the chair in front of her that she knew a bit about you. Ana had to have warned her before either of you arrived in Seattle for the wedding.

"I've heard stories of how you are away from weddings. I get it though, life feels a bit more special with all of this love in the air," Lia said. You thought that she was sweet, and a part of you was about to back out when she grabbed onto your wrist. "I fly out tomorrow afternoon, and I'd hate to leave without as many good memories as I can get."

"She'll kill me if we leave together," you told Lia. She glanced behind you and waved at Ana. You did everything in your power not to turn, but Lia seemed amused by whatever was going on behind you. "Is she being mean?"

"Not at all, but you should say your goodbyes and get your coat. I'm in room 615," Lia told you. She slipped her key card in your pocket, and you wondered how long she had been watching you. Lia left first, leaving you to sit there stunned for a moment. It was hasty, but you said your goodbyes and promised Ana that you'd be safe with her friend. She was a bit dismissive, but you didn't miss the little twinkle in her eye. If you had any more to drink, you would have considered that she was happy about you and Lia running off together.

It seemed almost too good to be true that Lia's room was on the same floor as yours. You made a quick stop at your own room to shed your suit jacket and make sure that you still looked good. Your room was only a few doors down from Lia's, and you wondered if she had seen you at all over the week. The entirety of the wedding party had been flown in several days earlier than all of the other guests, and you doubted the maid of honor had been an exception to that.

"You left your jacket. That's a shame, it looked good. At least I can still do this," Lia said as she grabbed you by your tie and pulled you into the room. You stumbled a little, but caught yourself as Lia's arms wrapped around your shoulders. She was still in her dress, but without her heels on, you were a couple inches taller than her. "You know, I had always hoped you would find your way to the WSL. I would have liked to play against you."

"I bet we could have had a lot of fun together." Lia seemed to catch onto the hidden meaning of your words quickly. You were a bit surprised by her forwardness as she kissed you. It was welcome, as was the feeling of her hands pulling your button out from where it had been tucked into your pants.

The women you hooked up with had all definitely wanted you, but they were rarely as confident in themselves as Lia. She was sweet and gentle, but it wasn't submissive in the slightest. She took what she wanted without overstepping, and it took you several moments for your brain to kick in and join her.

"Take my dress off," Lia told you. You didn't hesitate for even half a second to turn the Swiss woman around. There was a little clasp by the small of her back, and once it was undone, Lia let the dress slip off from her body and pool onto the floor.

You could see that her chest was bare, but that did nothing to prepare you for the sight of her. She stood in front of you completely topless. You weren't being subtle in your staring, but Lia didn't seem to mind it. She let you keep staring as she pushed you back onto the bed. Lia climbed onto your lap, and there she sat straddling you as she looked down at you.

"There are plenty of more comfortable places for you to sit," you started. Lia showed her amusement with a little half-smirk. Normally, your jokes garnered a bit more of a reaction, and the fact that she hadn't given you one made you want to try again. You wanted to impress this woman with every part of you, and you had no idea why. Nobody was supposed to mean this much to you, not for a single night anyway.

"I'm already practically naked on top of you, lines aren't necessary," Lia told you. You nodded and swallowed, somewhat nervous as she stared at you. It was like she was studying you, less out of curosity, but more in the way a predator would study its prey. "You're wearing too much, and I'd hate to ruin your very nice suit."

You nearly let out a whine as Lia moved off of you. You scrambled off of the bed and hastily undressed yourself, not caring that for a moment, you were more bare than she was. Lia hummed in appreciation as you stood in front of her, completely naked. She guided you down onto your knees in front of her and leaned over her own lap to kiss you.

"Show me what you can do. I hope everything I've heard about you is true," Lia said. Even after she broke the kiss, you didn't stop kissing her. Your mouth moved all over her neck and jaw, occasionally stopping to mark a couple of hickeys for her to take as a temporary souvenir. You were a lot less careful with your marking whenever you got to her chest, sucking as many love bites onto her skin as you could.

Lia tried not to rush you, but you could tell that her patience was growing thin. She ground herself against the palm of your hand as you cupped her over her underwear. You let out a pleasured groan at the feeling of her heat through the fabric. You could practically feel her arousal growing as she moved against your hand.

"More, I want more," Lia told you. You took your time teasing her as you took her underwear off. Your face was buried into the side of her thigh when your attention was pulled by a frustrated growl. Lia looked down at you with a look so sweet that you almost got whiplash from the way her hand balled into a fist around your hair.

You let her guide your face, only sticking your tongue out to give her something to seek out. Lia loosened her grip when she felt your lips wrap around her clit. Her thighs clamped around your head, holding you against her as she rocked her hips back and forth gently. You pried her thighs apart to make room for your fingers to tease at her entrance, stroking over the hole with the promise of penetration.

This time, Lia didn't have to ask or tell you to keep going. Once you got into your groove, everything came very naturally to you. Lia was moving wildly on the bed, each buck of her hips punctuated by a little creak of the bed. Between Lia's moaning, the bed creaking, and the absolutely obscene sound of your fingers fucking in and out of her, there wasn't a moment of silence.

"That's it, right there. Don't you dare stop. Oh fuck!" Lia exclaimed. You felt a sharp tug to your hair as her other hand wrapped around the back of your neck. You could feel her nails dig into your skin, but the pain of it just made your eyes roll back in your head a little. Above you, Lia's body held you close even as she tried to squirm away from you, torn between wanting to stop and wanting to see just how hard you could make her cum. Ultimately, she ended up pushing you away just a couple minutes later as her body began to approach overstimulation.

"I think you did a number on me," you muttered as you rubbed at the little nail indents on the back of your neck. Lia sat up on her elbows, just enough to see her reflection in the TV. She looked gorgeous to you, disheleved in the most perfect of ways. There was no denying what had just happened, not when you looked at Lia.

"I can do a lot worse," Lia laughed. You clammed up a bit at her words. You had no idea what was wrong with you because Lia shouldn't have been getting to you this badly. She was practically a stranger, and yet, you didn't want to just gather your clothes and run off to your own room just yet. "If you ever find yourself in London, message me. Now though, I think you should get going. Guests are going to be back any moment now."

"I've never been asked out and kicked out at the same time. You are something else," you said in disbelief. Lia could tell that you weren't angry, and just to keep it that way, she walked you out. A part of you wanted to linger, but aside from a pretty chaste kiss, Lia didn't give you the opportunity. You just had to hope that you'd catch her before she ran off the next day, but even if you didn't, you couldn't be mad about how your night went.

[morose-melodies]

love like this | yandere! capitano x reader

summary: you're terrified of the captain but what did he do wrong??

content warning: (y/n) thinks shes being abused (mental illness)

"I believe the captain will be coming back today."

the dark mansion felt gloomy ever since the announcement, you didn't hate him, no, but you weren't very excited to see him again.

subconsciously, you dragged a finger across your wrist before standing from the couch in the living room and peeking out of the window once again.

despite the confusing feelings you feel every time you think of him, you still enjoy his company and you're sure he enjoys yours too.

the windows were cold and your breath fogged up the view, but once it cleared, you noticed the gates were slowly opening and you imagined yourself running through those gate.

you smiled to yourself as you backed away from the window and turned to walk up the stairs, but that walking turned into running as you heard the front door open.

you ran down the dark, unlit hallway until you met the end of it, you opened the door and the end and closed it behind yourself, releasing a shaky breath.

you heard him walking up the stairs, coming closer and closer towards where you were, it was hard not to hear, you backed away from the door, running to the bathroom and slammed the door behind yourself.

you slumped down against the door, your hands against your chest to calm yourself down, but the panic your felt only seemed to become stronger as the seconds passed.

with shaky hands, you sat them to your sides, listening as the door to the main room opened, you hear capitano walk in before pausing.

you bit down onto your brusied lip, your hands trembling as your heard his foot steps get closer and closer towards the door.

he knocked on the door.

"I heard you run up the stairs. are you not feeling well?" His voice was muffled behind the door, you hesitated but then said, "I'm okay."

"if that's the case, let me in." He wasn't asking, he was demanding, you after steadying yourself, you stood up slowly and opened the door, peaking out.

he pushed the door open when you hesitated and pulled you into his arms, whispering to you how badly he missed you.

"it breaks my heart when you run away from me, do you know that?" He questioned, you shook your head, apologizing before pushing away from the hug.

his touch was cold.

he held you in his arms, refusing to release you, even as you pushed at his chest. his fingers wrapped around the thin fabric of your nightgown.

he took in a deep breath before saying, "I received a letter from your handmaiden," his grip on you loosened ever so slightly, but his grip on your gown remained the same, "in the letter, she told me that you've been going out, far more than you normally do. where have you been going, (y/n)?"

the way he spoke told you he was doubting you, it bothered you. it had been quite some time since you last acted out.

his grip on your gown tightened, as if he were hurrying you up, tell you to answer. he doesn't act like this usually.

his urgency worried you.

you blinked, once and then twice, your hands slowly dropping, no longer touching him, "you... you know I like going out. what's so weird about it?"

"where were you, (y/n)? tell me."

"I... I just visited the marketplace... I got very lonely while you were gone," you placed your hand onto capitano arm, lifting your eyes to look at him.

"and who took you there?"

"dottore... when he had free time, he would take me there." you replied, your voice slowly became more and more weak as you began to feel nervous.

capitano released your gown and in return you let go of his arm. "I remember telling you to go nowhere until I came back. how is it that you forget?"

"I'm sorry. I just got so lonely... I'm very sorry," after all you said, capitano still grabbed you, and carried you to his bedroom, despite all of your apologies.

down the dark hallway, capitano called out, "bring dinner to us, knock on the door before entering."

and a maid from downstairs answered, "of course, my lord."

upon entering his bedroom, he sat you at the edge of his bed. you shook your head, once again blubbering your apologies.

"stop it," capitano shook his head, holding a hand out, gesturing for you to be quiet, "I am not going to hurt you. it hurts me to see you so afraid."

but, how could you not be afraid? he was frightening. "o-okay," you sniffled, wiping away the stray tears on your face.

capitano seated himself beside you, his hand rested on your thigh, as if to steady you -- to calm you down. "you have to understand why I worry for you. tell me, (y/n), how many times have you ran off and gotten into trouble?"

many, many times but you couldn't bring yourself to reply, only sniffle.

"you and I both know you've gotten in trouble more times than we can count on our hands combined," capitano gently squeezed at the flesh on your thighs, "come here," he held his arms out and you crawled into his arms, letting him hug you.

"how could I ever harm you, (y/n)? what's the matter with you?" this had been going on for months now, it was sudden also, you woke up one morning and were terrified of the captain.

you would flinch at his every move, cower away from him, or even run to hide from him given the chance - it was disheartening. he tried to give you distance, he had tried everything for you.

he had given you months of space, time to think, time to be away from him - the captain thought, perhaps, that would fix the problem, but it did not.

the captain vividly remembered one night when you screamed and cried in your sleep - kicking, fighting, shivering, and murmuring. the captain couldn't watch it, so, he woke you up, pulling you into his arms, making you look at him - he questioned you, tried to soothe you but you looked at him with wide, terrified eyes.

what had gone so wrong? months prior, the captain would have sworn you loved him - you would run to greet him whenever he arrived home, you would pester him and you had never cowered in fear at the sight of him.

"if you would just tell me, (y/n), what I've done so wrong - I would do everything in my power to better it, I can promise you that," the captain ran his hand up your back, his hand moving to rest on your trembling shoulders, "speak to me, (y/n). I care for you, so, so much."

"you..." you paused, sniffling, your head resting on his shoulder, "you..." you couldn't remember but you were terrified and you couldn't understand why.

"(y/n), please," the captain pleaded, his hands holding your shoulders - his grip was not firm, not anymore, no, it was gentle, delicate. the captain tried so hard to make you feel safe, he tried so hard to make everything better.

you believed wholeheartedly that the captain had harmed you and the captain knew that. "(y/n)... I harmed you," it wasn't true, it wasn't, the captain wouldn't dare, no, he wouldn't dream of harming you but, for your sake... "what could I do to make it better?"

"wha..." you lifted your head, eyes wide as you looked at him - what could he do to make it better? "l-let me be," you stammered, squirming out of his lap to stand in front of him, "i... I don't want to be here all the time... I want to do normal things and live a normal lif-"

the captain nodded. "of course, I'd do anything to make this better, (y/n)," the captain stood and took a deep breath - he could already feel himself beginning to worry; what would happen if he let you leave the manor? would you be alright? would you attempt to leave him? would you-

"if it would make you feel better, (y/n), I will permit it."

[roguerambles]

I understand the disappointment, I really do, but I think people might be blowing the whole world state thing a bit out of proportion. "This is SPITTING IN THE FACE of long-time fans" no it's not Steve, calm down.

The series has always had to compromise when it comes to the state of the world because so many of the choices (especially from the end of Origins) were so wildly different that trying to build a sequel from so many conflicting factors would be more or less impossible. It's why we've never seen the Architect again, because him being alive or dead has HUGE ripple effects that are damn near impossible to write around.

Heck, it was entirely possible for Anders to die at the end of Awakening, but the writers wrote around it by saying "oh no he actually faked his death" even though logically that made very little sense because at that point he'd have absolutely no reason to do that? But Anders was in the sequel so that had to come up with something.

Basically nothing from Dragon Age 2 was important in Inquisition - Hawke siding with Mages or Templars made no difference, Anders being alive or dead made no difference, whether Carver or Bethany were dead or Wardens or whatever made no difference. We got some flavour text and that was literally it, everything else played out exactly the same.

Hell, the Temple of Sacred Ashes gets blown to bits at the beginning of Inquisition, rendering everything to do with that quest from Origins basically moot. And we've never gone back to Orzammar, and everything we have heard from it has been kept super vague, because depending on who the King is and if Branka is still alive there things would look WILDLY different.

It's why I highly doubt we'll be able to side with Solas and help him tear down the Veil because that would result in basically a whole new world being created. Imagine them trying to make Dragon Age 5 and being like "okay 50% sided with Solas and tore the Veil down and 50% kept the Veil intact....wtf now what do we do--?"

Again, I understand the disappointment, but I just hope once the dust has settled and people calm down a bit they'll see that, realistically, very little has changed. Your saves are still there, your experiences and enjoyment of the games and the characters and the story are still there, but they were always gonna have to draw the line SOMEWHERE. And that's not to say none of our previous choices will come back - if we get another game, or a spin off or something they'll probably do what they're doing with the Inquisitor now. They're just taking what's relevant to the story they are trying to tell.

[ninetailedfoxmanchi]

Mafia! BTS - They Are the Rival Boss Who Likes You (pt. 2)

Summary: You were in an abusive relationship with your ex-boyfriend who was also in a gang. At a benefit, you run into M/N, your boyfriend's rival, whose mind has been on you since he met you. He helps you escape and takes you to the safety of his apartment.

Warnings: mentions of abusive relationship, but mostly trauma recovery

PART 1

A/N: Without a doubt, the softest thing I have ever written. All of the members' Y/Ns are different though. They have different degrees of trauma and different ways of dealing with it.

I planned to post this days ago but I just couldn't do Jimin and Taehyung's part. I don't know why but I always struggle writing them the most, especially Taehyung ... His character gives me shivers, honestly, in the best way.

Let me know if I should do a part 3.

***

Jin

Although Jin asked if you were hungry, you did not have an appetite in the least. You asked to take a shower however, and Jin lent you some of his clothes to change into. You put on his sweatpants that you needed to roll up at the bottom and a knitted, white cashmere sweater softer than anything you had ever felt before in your life.

The rain only grew stronger outside when you returned to the living area finding Jin by the window, his hands stuck in the pockets of his trousers. He was in deep thought before he noticed you were back.

"How are you feeling?" asked Jin.

"Better," you nodded. The hot shower helped you calm down some although it also made you exponentially more tired.

"How are you?" you asked Jin in turn. He looked at you.

"Good," Jin nodded softly, a small smile on his lips. He could see the tiredness in your eyes and the yawns that you desperately tried to suppress but failed.

"You should try and get some rest," said Jin reassuringly and showed you to the guest bedroom.

Once you you wished Jin goodnight, you climbed into the bed eagerly and pulled the covers over you. The walls of the room were a shade of grey so pale it was almost blue, with a white ceiling and a matching carpet. The bed had an ornate white frame in the same style as the vanity table and the closets along the wall. You only managed to look yourself in the mirror for a moment when brushing your teeth, feeling almost disgusted with yourself. You could not believe you asked Jin for help and asked him to expose himself. It was a moment of desperation, you knew, but it did not make you feel anything better - or helped you fall asleep any faster.

It was only towards dawn that exhaustion took you and you managed to get a couple of hours of good sleep, but for most of the night, your mind could produce nothing but nightmares. You dreamed of Kang, of your family, and even of Jin. Yet even though you did not sleep much, you still felt better when you rolled out of bed in mid-morning.

You could hear the movement in the kitchen when you opened the door of the guest bedroom. You did not know why but you tiptoed down the hallway, slowly peeking into the kitchen. Jin was at the counter cutting up some fruit, a pot of French press getting ready. He was wearing a pale blue shirt and black trousers, an elegant wristwatch shinning on his hand.

Jin could feel your gaze on him, having heard the door of your bedroom open.

"Good morning," said Jin when he saw you half-leaning, half-hiding behind the wall of the hallway that opened into the kitchen one the one side and living area on the other.

"Morning," you said quietly as you joined Jin in the kitchen.

"Do I ... I can I help with anything?" you asked, feeling completely useless.

"It's okay," smiled Jin. "There's coffee."

You nodded and uttered a small 'thank you', your eyes drifting to the dining table. It was sat beautifully with napkins, little bowls, cups and glasses.

"Cream, sugar?" asked Jin as he poured you some French press. You stared at him.

"Why are you so kind to me?" you found yourself asking. The pang of guilt you have been feeling was no longer just a pang but a heavy mass that weighed on your chest.

Jin leaned his long arms against the counter, the smile leaving his eyes beneath a forming frown.

"Why did you even help me?" you asked almost desperately. Your eyes filled with tears suddenly and you hated yourself for it.

"You asked me," said Jin somberly, staring down at you.

"But I shouldn't have!" you cried, wiping away your tears that kept on falling. "You should have said no ..."

"What are you talking about?" asked Jin astounded. He took your palm and squeezed your fingers in his hand reassuringly.

"If something happened to you for helping me ..." you shook your head, hiding your eyes behind your free hand as you tried to stop yourself from crying.

Jin watched you, taken back by your words. His heart weighed heavy in his chest to see you cry.

"I should have never gotten you into this," you whispered once you managed to calm down a little. "You're the only friend I got."

Jin tugged on your hand gently and pulled you to him, his arms wrapping around your body. You did not know how to react at first but your hands soon found their way around Jin's shoulders as you curled up against his chest.

"You didn't get me into anything, Y/N," said Jin definitively. "You got yourself out of something."

You nodded as you pulled away, trying to wipe away the tear stains but Jin beat you to it. His large hands cupped your face as he brushed away your tears with his thumbs and made you look up at him.

"Now ... Cream, sugar?" Jin smiled warmly.

Namjoon

You looked around the living area whilst Namjoon disappeared to get you some clothes to change into. His place was very different from what you expected by the look of him. Although in truth, you knew the problem was that you did not know him at all. The thought made you nervous and yet not as nervous as what your night, your life with Kang would have been like if you had not left with Namjoon tonight.

Your eyes skimmed over the books on the shelves, the magazines and newspapers on the coffee table. It was raining outside, millions of drops gliding down the window-wall that opened into an atrium with a small tree. It was pleasant inside, however, with the soft carpet beneath your feet and plants from orchids to bonsai everywhere you looked.

You thought Namjoon would live in a tall skyscraper and yet the drive took you to the outskirts of the city, to a short apartment building. You turned back to the atrium and frowned, wondering whether he owned the entire building.

"Here," said Namjoon, waking you from your thoughts. You jumped around, your eyes on the clothes Namjoon was offering you.

"Everything I have is going to be too big on you," said Namjoon with a small shake of his head as he licked his lips.

"That's fine," you breathed, grateful. It would have been enough if he simply dropped you off somewhere. You could hardly believe that you were even in his home.

"You didn't ..." you began voicing a horrible thought that appeared in your mind but stopped yourself when Namjoon's eyes met yours. Your lips parted yet you could not make yourself say it.

"What?" encouraged Namjoon.

"Nothing," you shook your head as your mouth went dry.

"What?" insisted Namjoon, his dark eyes forcing the answer from you as his brows furrowed into a frown. You clutched the clothes closer to your chest, your fists balling around the soft material of the hoodie and sweatpants he gave you.

"I just ..." you tried again, feeling as if you had swallowed a ball of sand. "Are you helping me to get revenge on Kang?"

The answered scared you. Even if Namjoon was only using you to get ahead of Kang and to spite him, there was very little you could do about it. Once caught up in this world, it was impossible to get out. You were just Namjoon's plaything. And it would explain why he brought you to his apartment and not simply dropping you off at a station or something.

Your heart was thumping hard against your throat as heat prickled on your neck.

Namjoon stared at you for a moment, a moment that seemed to you to last forever although it was barely a few seconds. He turned away and let out a short breath before he licked his lips and his dark eyes returned to you.

"It would be outrageous if I liked you, wouldn't it?" said Namjoon serenely as if he were only thinking out loud, his voice quiet but deep.

It took you a moment to realize it was not serenity Namjoon spoke with but disillusionment. Your lips parted but his words had knocked you out of air.

A loud thunder echoed through the air, making you wince as you looked over your shoulder and into the stormy night air. But as you returned your attention on Namjoon, he was already making for the kitchen.

You hurried, catching up to him when Namjoon suddenly turned around. You had to take a step back to be able to look up at him, a flush of hot fever rushing to your cheeks.

"You like me?" you breathed, your chest rising and falling heavily as your eyes locked with his. You could not tell what Namjoon was thinking but there was a storm of thoughts behind his eyes.

A small, almost invisible breath escaped Namjoon's lips before he turned around, reaching for the teapot.

"Wait," you reached for Namjoon's hand instead. His dark eyes followed your touch back to your eyes. "Please talk to me," you begged in a whisper, tears threatening to creep into your eyes.

Namjoon studied you before he leaned down closer to you.

"I like you," said Namjoon quietly, his chest rumbling with the deepness of his voice. His eyes radiated a warmth you had never known before. Suddenly, all of the times you saw Namjoon at all of those benefits and fundraisers came flooding right back to you: the warm smiles hiding in his eyes, the nods, and the hellos, when he talked to you - how he talked to you ...

"You like me?" you exhaled incredulously.

The warmth inside Namjoon's eyes swirled with amusement as he breathed a smile, this time managing to reach for the teapot. He could feel your gaze on his back as he poured water into the kettle, the smile on his lips growing.

You were too stunned to speak, certain that he would dismiss your assumptions and not confirm them. You did not know how you felt about Namjoon, you hardly knew him; but you could definitely feel the butterflies in your stomach.

You managed to take a shower and wash the makeup off your face before changing into the clothes Namjoon lent you. He was right too; you had to roll up the cuffs of the sweatpants whilst his hoodie fell to the middle of your thighs. You did not mind though, grateful to get out of the evening dress you wore before.

You found Namjoon in the living room, his back to you as he spoke on the phone, holding a tall cup of tea between the tips of his fingers. You leaned against the arch that opened into the living area, waiting for him to finish the conversation. Namjoon had heard you coming and ended the phone call, his gaze rising from your toes up to your eyes as he saw you in his clothes.

Your heart began beating faster in your chest as blood rushed to your cheeks.

"Is everything alright?" you asked, referring to Namjoon's phone call.

"Everything is alright," confirmed Namjoon and made his way over to you. Although the phone call was Yoongi who called him with news of Kang's rage and promises of revenge, Namjoon wouldn't dream of telling you. You were upset enough as it was.

Namjoon did not have to tell you though. You had become frighteningly good at noticing even the smallest signs of tension in the past months and you could see it in Namjoon's broad shoulders.

"He knows I'm here, doesn't he?" you asked quietly. Your eyes prickled with tears but you looked away. You were so tired of crying.

Your gaze rose to Namjoon's when he did not say anything.

"Doesn't he?" you whispered to keep your voice from breaking. Namjoon's eyes watched you, a parting in his lips as he realized he could not lie to you, not when you looked at him with tears in your eyes.

"He knows."

"I should—"

"You don't have to worry about it. I'll handle it," Namjoon cut you off immediately. He would not hear it.

"But—"

"Y/N, I'll handle it," decided Namjoon, giving you no space to argue. Your eyes studied his face but he was unwavering in his decision.

You had no choice but to nod although it only made the tears spill from your eyes as your chin quivered. It was all too much: Kang, the benefit, the escape, rolling all of this responsibility on Namjoon ...

"I'm sorry," you whispered hiding your eyes behind your hand.

"Don't apologize," said Namjoon sternly. "Not for this." His arms wrapped around your shoulders and pulled you closer, his hand holding your head to his chest as you began to sob. You wanted to apologize a thousand times but Namjoon did not want your apologies; there was nothing to apologize for. He only wanted to hold you and make sure you were safe.

Yoongi

You looked around the apartment warily whilst Yoongi went to get you some clothes to change into as you were still wearing the evening gown. You took a step closer the wall stacked with hundreds upon hundreds of vinyl records. You read some of the tiny titles scribbled on their sides when Yoongi suddenly reappeared behind you.

"I was just looking," you said quickly, making sure he knew you did not touch any of his things.

Yoongi looked at you. "You don't have to just look," he said, gesturing at the record player sitting near the window. You followed his gaze.

"Oh," you breathed. "That's okay." A small smile came to rest on your lips.

Yoongi handed you a pair of grey sweatpants and a soft black hoodie. You thanked him, holding the clothes to your chest.

You could not believe the reality of your situation or what made you agree to do this in the fist place. You may have spoken to Min Yoongi a couple of times before but in truth you did not know him at all and the thought frightened you.

Yoongi showed you around the apartment to break the uncomfortable silence. He opened the door of the bathroom, gestured to his bedroom at the end of the hallway and showed you to the guest bedroom. Yoongi held the door open for you to enter. You hesitated, not catching on to his gesture and waiting for him to enter first.

Yoongi's dark eyes waited on you. You glanced at him.

"Oh," was all that came from your mouth before you quickly scurried inside. The walls were a deep colour neither grey nor green with white wooden lining and a light ceiling that brightened the room. There was cherry blossom in the vase on the nightstand and a large bed with cozy pillows and blankets in the shades of beige against one of the walls.

"I can stay here?" you asked carefully, not wanting to take anything for granted. It was hard enough for you to believe that anyone would go up against Kang for anything, much less to help you.

"It's yours," said Yoongi, leaning against the door frame. "I will let you get changed," he said before you could thank him. He closed the door quietly behind him.

You sat on the edge of the bed, your body sinking into the soft mattress. You held Yoongi's clothes close to you as if they were a pillow. They smelled of laundry detergent and the beautiful fragrance he always wore. You closed your eyes but shouldn't have because your eyes spilled with hot tears and your chest was heavy with sobs that you would not let Yoongi to hear. You weren't sure why you were crying; was it relief or fear or both or nothing at all, but a part of it was all of the stress and anxiety that built up inside of you over the past months.

You changed into the clothes Yoongi gave you whilst still calming yourself down some. You slipped into the bathroom unnoticed and washed your face. One look at your make up and he would have know you had been crying. Yoongi knew anyway though from the redness of your eyes and the tone of your voice.

"Are you hungry?" asked Yoongi and opened the door of his fridge. It was always stacked with food although he almost never ate at home.

"I'm okay," you said genuinely as you leaned against the counter. You could not possibly have anything to eat in that moment.

Yoongi closed the fridge, his ink black eyes turning to you. His clothes were too big on you but he figured they were more comfortable than in the stunning dress you wore.

"I can make you some tea," suggested Yoongi and took a step closer, seeing the restlessness in your eyes.

"It's okay," you spoke quietly, using much self-control not to take a step back. "Thank you," you found yourself saying at last. "For everything."

"You don't need to thank me for anything," said Yoongi, uninterested in your gratitude.

"But I do," you insisted and your eyes watered again. You hated yourself for crying so much but you could not control it. Just the thought of what tonight might have been like for you, if Kang lost control like he did before the benefit ... What tomorrow would have been like and every day that followed if you had not managed to get away from him.

"You don't," said Yoongi again and yet his expression softened when he saw you like this. "You should get some rest," he said gently.

You nodded as he walked you to the guest bedroom. You hesitated before you went in.

"I saw you have sleeping pills in the bathroom," you began, threading lightly. "Would it be okay if I had one?"

"Of course," agreed Yoongi and brought you a glass of water.

"You don't have to ask me this," said Yoongi as you took the sleeping pill. "Anything you need, it's yours." You stared at Yoongi with the glass in your hand. He took it, his fingers brushing against yours, making your skin tingle.

"Thank you," you said again but Yoongi gave no sign of recognizing your gratitude. He would not accept it because in his mind's eye everything he did for you and everything you needed was a given.

You said your good-nights before you closed the door behind you and climbed into bed. You surrounded yourself with pillows, and although your mind was screaming with thoughts and emotions that made your tears soak the covers beneath your head, the sleeping pill was even stronger than you anticipated. You fell into a deep slumber, sleeping for nearly fourteen hours without waking.

Yoongi could barely sleep at all however. He had half a mind to take the sleeping pill himself but he needed himself alert. So instead, Yoongi lay in bed thinking and staring at the ceiling. He could not have cared less about Kang or the rivalry or any of it; his mind always only drifted off to you.

Yoongi would get up every couple of hours and quietly open the door to your bedroom only enough to see that you were alright and sound asleep.

Yoongi came to check on you one last time after he managed to get a couple of hours of sleep himself. Morning was already piercing into view on the horizon when he glanced into your room. He pushed the door open quietly and fixed the comforter over you as it was almost on the floor. Your body sought the warmth in your sleep when the comforter was drawn over you once again and your arms wrapped around it, hugging it close. A small sigh escaped your lips when Yoongi brushed a stray lock of hair from your eyes. He could hear the sound of his own heart ringing in his ears at how beautiful you looked. It took all the strength in him to peel himself away from your side and to not caress your cheek, which could cause you to wake. He did not even want to imagine the look on your face if you found him in your room when you woke. You were already anxious enough because of Kang.

The thought of that man made Yoongi's blood boil. He closed the door of your bedroom gently although the anger he was feeling could have him slam them to the point of breaking.

Yoongi took a long shower to clear his mind and wake him up properly. Kang knew you were with Yoongi and he promised an all-out war. Yoongi could not help but smile to himself as hot water poured down his body. He would enjoy every minute of destroying Kang. He thought about it still even as he got dressed, his wrath fueled even more each time he remembered your bruise and the way Kang must have been treating you.

Yoongi exited his bedroom so deep in thought he almost collided with you, who also just came out of your room. Yoongi's eyes went wide as he steadied you by the shoulders, the scent of your perfume that still lingered on your skin from last night triggering goosebumps on his arms, but it was nothing compared to your small hands resting against his chest.

You stared at Yoongi in his black t-shirt and his black trousers as caught off guard as he was.

"Sorry," you said quickly and took a step back.

Compared to last night, you were more rested than ever. You could not even recall when you last had such a good night's sleep, having slept next to a person you did not trust and did not want anymore for weeks.

"I'm sorry for last night too," you began. Yoongi looked at you surprised. "I wasn't myself; I was tired and I was scared ... And I just ... I really wanted to thank you for everything," you confessed as you bit the inside of your lip.

"Y/N—"

"Please, Yoongi, I just ..." you cut him off but did not know how to put it in words. Yoongi's face softened even more than you thought possible hearing the sound of his name roll off your tongue.

"I just ..." you tried again but there were no words that you could find. Instead, you stepped on the tips of your toes and reached your hands around Yoongi's neck as you pulled him into a tight hug. He froze for a moment, before his arms locked around the middle of your back, his face burying in your neck.

"Thank you," you whispered again and found that this time Yoongi did not protest.

Hoseok

Jung took you to his apartment in the city. The building was an enormously tall skyscraper with a doorman and security men posted at every corner. Your gaze traced their heavy guns as Hoseok led you to the elevator. The closer you got to your final destination, the more anxious you became and the adrenaline began to disappear. The reality of it all hit you like a ton of bricks, a thousand worries weighing down on your chest.

"He doesn't know where you live, does he?" you asked Jung carefully just before the elevator opened.

Hoseok placed his hand on the side of the door to let you pass in case it tried to close.

"Who?" asked Jung as you stepped out into the small, bright corridor. A couple of more men were posted there, making you nervous as your worried eyes returned to Jung.

"He doesn't," assured Hoseok when he saw the look in your eyes. "Even if he did, he would never make it past the lobby."

Jung typed in the security code and pressed his finger against the pad before the door opened.

"Come in."

You stepped inside warily, quickly looking for signs of anything out of the ordinary. But the apartment was beautiful. The hallway opened into a spacious living area that lead to the kitchen and dining room. The walls were creamy and bright and decorated with artwork. There were bookshelves and plants and large windows that allowed for a view of the city, bringing life into the room.

You took off your heels, hesitating a little before entering the living area. It was all so clean and organized like something off a magazine or a Pinterest board.

"It's okay," said Hoseok, the tips of his fingers gently brushing against your shoulder blade.

You nodded. There was a strange warmth about Hoseok that you could not explain. Every instinct in your body trusted him although your mind and reason still needed some convincing. You barely knew him in truth.

Hoseok lent you some of his clothes to change into, a pair of cozy sweatpants and a soft t-shit your body got lost in. He asked if you were hungry or wanted anything else but you had no appetite. Your stomach was still in knots.

Hoseok showed you the guest bedroom where you could stay. The room was warm and inviting, with pale pistachio-green walls and a beige-white carpet that framed the bed, which was topped with pillows and blankets.

The sight of it all, how beautiful and inviting and warm it was, gave your chest a painful squeeze. You hated the tears that prickled your eyes but you could not help but ask,

"Why are you helping me?"

Your voice was soft but your brows gathered into a frown when you looked up at Hoseok. He seemed surprised by your question.

"Why wouldn't I?"

"You barely know me," you found yourself whispering to keep your voice from cracking.

"I know enough," said Hoseok, who now frowned as well. You were taken back by how drastically his features could change from soft and inviting, to authoritative and pensive although there was still warmth you could recognize in his dark eyes.

"But how?" you asked quietly, your gaze locked with his. Hoseok looked away and licked his lips before his eyes returned to you.

"I have been keeping an eye on you," he confessed.

"Why?" you breathed, astonished and your brows raised. Hoseok did not say anything although his eyes spoke loudly enough for you to understand.

"My bedroom is just down the hall if you'll need anything," said Hoseok and tore his gaze away from yours. He turned around and made to leave, keeping the door of your bedroom cracked open.

You found yourself forgetting to breathe as you watched him leave. You sat on the edge of the bed overwhelmed with emotions. Hand clutched over your chest, you tried to steady your breathing and ease the pain that assembled in your lungs. You tried to find some sleep but you only twisted and turned all night and waited for the morning to come.

You emerged from the room early in the morning, surprised to find Hoseok awake as well. What more, you found him dressed in a pair of elegant black trousers and a crisp white shirt, freshly shaven and showered, smelling like heaven. The entire hallway smelled like his bodywash, giving you goosebumps

You felt like you were in nothing more than a garbage bag compared to Hoseok although it was his Prada t-shirt you were wearing.

Hoseok looked up from his phone, feeling a pair of eyes on him. You blushed and hoped it did not show in the early morning light and with your hair let down.

"Awake already?" asked Hoseok, his morning voice soft and nothing short of warm as he was leaning against the kitchen counter. You nodded, still lingering in the narrow hallway, which opened into the kitchen and living area.

"Did you sleep well?"

You shook your head and joined him at the counter, sitting down on one of the chairs. "I couldn't keep my mind off things," you murmured, your voice soft and quiet in the morning hour. "How did you sleep?"

Something shifted in Hoseok's eyes when you asked him that. "I couldn't keep my mind off things either," he said unblinking, taking in your features: the sheet wrinkles on the side of your neck, the way you breathed softly with your sleepy eyes on his.

Hoseok looked away. He grabbed a large paper shopping bag that sat at his feet and placed it on the counter. They were clothes for you - only some basic items but you were too shocked to thank him.

"You went shopping?" you asked wide-eyed although it probably wasn't even seven in the morning and everything was still closed.

"No, I had someone bring them over," smiled Hoseok.

"I didn't go anywhere," he said after a moment, frowning at the thought of leaving you there all alone.

Hoseok could not sleep at night because his mind kept drifting off to you, sleeping in his apartment, in his guest bedroom down the hall. He thought about your conversation last night and how he handled it. Hoseok was determined to make up for it and ordered his personal assistant to find some clothes for you even if he had to wake the owner of the shopping center in the middle of the night. He wanted to make you comfortable by at least getting you some clothes of your own and some essentials you might need.

You watched Hoseok as a cloud of steam rose continuously from his coffee. You followed a strand of his hair that threatened onto his eyes. You reached over hesitantly, carefully catching the lock between your fingers and tucking it in its place.

Hoseok froze still as you did that, his dark eyes piercing through you as heat crept to your cheeks.

"Sorry," you whispered and crossed your arms again as you were leaning against the counter. Little did you know Hoseok's heart threatened to jump from his chest from racing so fast, and even less did he know that yours wanted to do the same.

Jimin

Jimin took you to his apartment in the city. The building was secured from top to bottom with security posted at every corner. The sight of the guards calmed you and made you anxious at the same time. You quickened your pace, your hand slipping into Jimin's instinctively. His sharp eyes snapped to you, his reaction making you realize what you were doing.

"Sorry," you said quickly, your eyes wide as you tried to take your hand back but Jimin would not let it go. Instead, his fingers intertwined with yours as you entered the elevator. You squeezed Jimin's hand subconsciously, your knee fidgeting beneath your elegant black dress. Your mind rushed in every direction with thoughts of Kang and the benefit at its centre. You wondered how long it took for him to notice that you were gone and that Park was gone too.

"He doesn't ... He doesn't know where you live, does he?" you asked gravely just as the elevator door opened. Jimin's gaze locked with yours. The door wanted to close again but his hand stopped them.

"Of course not," said Jimin darkly. You exited the elevator. "And if he does, he'll be shot dead before he makes it past the lobby," added Jimin, knocking the breath out of you. You stared at him paralyzed as he typed in the code of the apartment lock, imagining the scene in your head. Although Kang has been terrible to you and you wanted nothing else but to get away from him, a part of you still cared for some reason. You have been together for nearly two years and not all of it was bad. Yet on the other hand, if Kang came after Jimin for helping you ...

"Come," said Jimin as he opened the door for you.

You stared at Jimin whilst your heart weighed heavy in your chest and your lungs turned to lead with worry. You took your hand from his.

"I should go," you found yourself saying and turned on your heel, pressing the elevator button.

"Y/N," called Jimin, already catching your hand before the elevator door could even open. "What are you talking about?" His eyebrows had formed into a terrible frown. You could not even look at him as your eyes filled with hot tears.

"I shouldn't be here," you hurried, "If Kang finds out where I am—"

"I told you you're safe, Y/N," Jimin cut you off and you finally managed to look at him, your big watery eyes finding his.

"I don't care about me," you cried. "What if he hurts you?" You looked away as two salty tears slipped down your cheeks. You brushed them away with your free hand, doing your best to control the sobs that wanted nothing more but to escape your lungs.

You looked back up at Jimin when he did not say anything. His frown was almost gone and his jaw softened as his brown eyes filled with warmth.

Another tear slipped from your eye but Jimin caught it with his thumb.

"Come in," assured Jimin, his voice gentle. You hesitated but the tug of Jimin's hand encouraged you before he led you inside.

Jimin turned on the lights, revealing a spacious living area at the end of the short hallway. You slipped off your heels and took in the view. The rich dark tones of the walls and the furniture were balanced out by the white ceilings and warm lights. The living room opened into the kitchen and dining room that further led to a narrow hallway.

"Come, let's get you some clothes," said Jimin, making you turn around. There was a staircase behind you that led to a second floor.

Jimin pushed open the door of his bedroom as he led you through it to his walk-in closet. His room was the opposite of downstairs with its pale walls and dark hardwood floors. The walls of Jimin's walk-in closet, however, were lined with suits and shirts and jewellery and shoes.

"Are you cold? Do you want a hoodie?" asked Jimin but received no answer from you. When he turned around, he found your eyes on one the dressers he had especially made. Jimin forgot one of the drawers open, one with a slick black sniper gun lying in a bed of foam of its exact shape.

Jimin let go of your hand and closed the drawer with a swift gesture. The drawer locked into the dresser, only Jimin's fingerprint being able to open it again.

Your heart was beating hard against your throat as you gaze met with Jimin's. This was not your first time seeing a gun yet the sight of it sent shivers down your spine nonetheless.

"T-shirt or hoodie?" asked Jimin again, changing the topic completely.

"A t-shirt is fine," you managed to utter and although your voice was near as quiet as a whisper, your voice crack slightly anyway. You could see that Jimin noticed because his body froze when he heard it even if only for a split second.

Jimin handed you one of his t-shirts and a pair of cozy sweatpants and gave you some privacy to change.

You slipped from your dress and put on his clothes before emerging from the closet. You expected to find him in his room but he wasn't there. You thought to find him downstairs but you could not help but take a look around Jimin's bedroom. There was a silver laptop on his large bed, only the lamp from his nightstand turned on. You stopped in front of the window-wall and took in the full view of the city; the yellow and red lights glowed in the rainy night with blue lights from an ambulance or a police car passing by here and there. You sank deep in thought. The image of Kang's eyes, of his clenched jaw, and loud voice persisted in your mind as you remembered your last argument. You remembered the fear and the insecurity.

You felt heat on the back of your neck and the pressure of anxiety in your chest. You sat down in one of the two armchairs by the window, trying to calm your trembling hands.

"You know you're sitting in my favourite chair," said Jimin, a shadow of a playful smile in the corner of his lips but you could not see it; you could only hear his words.

"W-What?" you stuttered, comprehending what he said. You stood up quickly, "I-I'm sorry, I didn't know ..."

Your big wide eyes jumped to Jimin's as you hugged your arms. His eyebrows hung in a formidable frown, his dark eyes darting to your hands. Although he knew it was there, Jimin's gaze fell upon your bruised elbow for the first time. The purple fingertips that were imprinted into your skin made his stomach twist into knots. It took every ounce of discipline in him not to storm out and kill Kang with his bare hands. Jimin knew you guys fought a lot but he never realized it was this bad or he would have done something about it.

"Y/N," whispered Jimin, his hands slowly cupping your cheeks. You did not even know when it happened but there were tears falling from your eyes. Jimin tried to brush them away with his thumbs but only more fell.

"Y/N, please ..." begged Jimin, his heart falling to pieces to see you cry. You sniffled back a sob and looked down. How you hated to cry; it made you feel weak and helpless but nothing you could do would stop it in that moment.

Jimin pulled you closer, his arms securing around your trembling frame. Your hands wrapped around his waist as sobs filled your lungs. Jimin caressed your hair and held you to him as you cried, his chin resting on top of your head.

Taehyung

You observed Taehyung with the corner of your eye as he drove, still not knowing where he was taking you. You began to doubt whether this was a good idea, whether you could trust Taehyung. They were all in this business together with the same sort of tactics and manipulations. For a moment, you considered it was all just a trap, that Kang and Taehyung made some sort of agreement for your boyfriend to test your loyalty or play a trick on you.

Your hands began to tremble as you blinked back the tears. Taehyung made a sharp turn into the garage of a tall building. You found yourself holding your breath until he parked and you got out of the car. The neon lights almost blinded you but Taehyung found your hand to guide you. He took you to the elevator guarded by three heavily armed bodyguards. They all nodded at Taehyung, their eyes only noting your presence before turning away.

Your heart was beating loud and your head began to feel light as the elevator rose to the topmost floor of the building. You had not even noticed but you have been subconsciously squeezing Taehyung's hand in a fidgety repetition as you tried to calm down. You could feel Taehyung's quiet gaze on you all the way up until the elevator door slid open.

When Taehyung let go of your hand to type in the security code for his apartment, you instinctively hugged your bare arms. Your gaze shifted along the narrow corridor, somehow expecting for Kang to appear in front of you.

"Come in," asked Taehyung not ungently but you nearly gasped at the sound of his voice that startled you from your thoughts. He noticed because an even darker frown settled on his eyes.

"Thank you," you said quietly and slipped inside, trying to disguise how scared you really were. But there was no fooling Taehyung.

You took off your heels, now standing much shorter to Taehyung than before. Your eyes scanned his beautiful apartment and still searched for anything that would stand out. Dark and rich earthy colours dominated everywhere you looked, brightened by warm lights and large windows.

Taehyung showed you around to the kitchen and the dining area and the main hallway which led to one of the bathrooms, his office, a guest bedroom and his own bedroom.

You waited whilst Taehyung got you some of his clothes to change into, your eyes scanning the apartment anxiously. You almost jumped when Taehyung reappeared at your side, handing you a pair of sweatpants and a black t-shirt.

You thanked him, squeezing the clothes to your chest. "Can I take a shower?" you asked hesitantly.

"Of course," said Taehyung and opened the door of the bathroom for you. He disappeared quietly, giving you the privacy you needed.

The hot water felt good against your skin and calmed some of your nerves although you were still on pins and needles. You dried yourself and changed into the comfortable clothes Taehyung lent you. Your skin smelled of his bodywash, giving you goosebumps.

You found Taehyung in the living room, sitting elegantly on the sofa. His eyes rose from his phone and took in the sight of you in his clothes. You had to roll up the cuffs of the pants but otherwise they were perfect.

"Feeling better?"

You nodded a little, slowly making your way to the sofa where you sat down as well, not too close, not too far from Taehyung.

"Why did you help me?" you asked hesitantly, your voice barely above a whisper. If this was not a trap as Kang was nowhere to be seen, you could not help but wonder why Taehyung offered his help to you.

Taehyung turned to you, his formidable presence making your stomach twist and your heart give a painful squeeze.

"I like you ... so I helped you," Taehyung said calmly, the tone of his voice smooth and even like molten gold.

I like you.

A shivery breath caught in the back of your throat as you felt the tips of your fingers prickle with needles. Your heart was beating wildly against your chest.

"And you ... You don't want anything in return for ... For helping me?" you asked timidly, studying Taehyung's face as your eyes found his. He paused.

"Like what?" asked Taehyung. You could see it in the somber expression of his face that he could read the thoughts behind your eyes. He knew what you were asking but was offended by it.

You looked away quickly as your entire body suddenly seemed like it was on fire. Your gaze turned to your hands where you picked on the skin around your nails anxiously. You could feel Taehyung's gaze burn into you.

"I don't want anything in return, Y/N," said Taehyung calmly. He got up and ran a hand through his hair. "You should get some rest."

You looked up at him as Taehyung made past you. A pang of guilt cut deep into your chest when you watched his frame disappear down the hallway.

You tried to find some sleep that night but you couldn't. Although the bed was perfect, the temperature just to your liking, it was your mind that was in a tempest and kept you up. Even when you managed to find sleep for a few minutes, your mind replayed Kang's words mingled with Taehyung's like a broken record.

You're never leaving me. Ever. -I like you. -You're never leaving me. Ever. -I like you. You're never—

You woke up with a start, a loud gasp escaping your lungs as you sat up in bed. The guest bedroom was already kissed by daylight, now waking in the shades of creamy white and deep espresso brown instead of shadows appearing everywhere you looked. The room itself could nearly be an apartment in its own right with its ornate loveseat and a matching armchair, with paintings and dressers and lively green plants.

You rolled out of bed still more rested than you went to sleep even though you had an uneasy night. At the least you could think more clearly than yesterday, which also meant that you felt even guiltier than before.

You expected to find Taehyung somewhere in the living area or the kitchen but he was nowhere to be seen. He was not in the bathroom across your room either, which only left his bedroom. Just as you were about to hide back in the guestroom for a while longer, Taehyung appeared on the doorway of his bedroom.

A blush so strong rose to your cheeks that your skin pulsated with fever. Taehyung was in nothing but a pair of trousers, his hair ruffled and his eyes full of sleep as he leaned one of his arms against the door frame beside his head.

"I'll get dressed in a minute," said Taehyung abently, his voice so deep and husky with sleep it made goosebumps rise on your arms and legs.

"Take your time," you managed to utter, now feeling the blush prickle your chest and neck as well. The image of Taehyung's bare chest would not leave your mind no matter how hard you tried.

You waited in the kitchen, pacing and biting your lip, when Taehyung appeared once again. He wore a pair of elegant black trousers and a matching shirt with sleeves rolled up to his elbows. A silver wristwatch rested on one of his hands, the other one resting snugly in his pocket. His dark eyes found you immediately although he was in urgent need of some coffee.

"Did you get any rest?" you spoke, desperate to cut through the silence.

The espresso machine was already buzzing busily when Taehyung turned to you, leaning against the counter.

"I should be asking you that," said Taehyung huskily, a hint of amusement hiding in his eyes. You did not say anything though but waited for him to go first.

"I didn't sleep much," Taehyung told truthfully.

"Me neither," you agreed. "I couldn't stop thinking ... I ... I shouldn't have said that last night." You looked down for a moment, ashamed of yourself.

"Said what?"

"You helped me and I questioned your intentions," you said desperately, beginning to think Taehyung was torturing you on purpose. But when you looked into his eyes, there was nothing he was not sharing with you.

Taehyung stood up straight and walked over to you, stopping only inches away. He leaned down, his forehead nearly touching yours as a sharp breath caught in your throat. Your heart raced wildly.

"If you weren't you, you would have been right to question my intentions," said Taehyung, both of his hands now hidden in the pockets of his trousers yet his gaze remained burned into yours.

"You are in luck though," he spoke again, sending shivers down your spine. "Because as strange and unusual as I as well find it, my intentions with you are nothing if not pure," Taehyung purred, his eyes filled with unusual warmth.

The espresso machine gave a quiet ring.

"Coffee?"

Jungkook

You arrived at Jungkook's apartment building in the middle of the night. The stress not only of the evening alone but the past couple of months caught up to you. Once the adrenaline of escaping your boyfriend subsided, you could not even bring yourself to talk. The entire ride was filled with not uncomfortable silence although you were still on pins and needles. You had not planned to leave the benefit or your now ex-boyfriend the way you did, much less did you think Jeon would be the person to help you do it. You worried you might have made a wrong decision asking him for help as you glanced at his tattooed knuckles gripping onto the steering wheel and his formidable frown.

You got out of the car the moment the engine died, yearning for a breath of fresh air. You did not get it though as you were in the garage of the apartment building and the air was worse than ever. Instead, you came face to face with men clad in black carrying heavy weapons. The sight made your stomach twist into even tighter knots but it was too late now.

You followed Jungkook into the elevator that eventually rose to the top of the building. The ride made you uneasy, making your head feel as light as a feather. Just as the walls seemed to start closing down on you, the door of the elevator opened following a ring.

Jungkook placed his hand on the side of the door to keep it from closing as you walked out. You waited for him in front of another pair of doors where Jungkook typed in the code of the security lock and had the scanner read his fingerprint.

Jungkook opened the door for you, letting you enter first. He turned on the lights quickly and closed the entrance behind him. The click of the door made you turn around, your eyes darting to his. His eyebrows seemed to be frozen in a frown since you left the benefit.

Jungkook's gaze revisited the place where Kang left his fingerprints, his mind drifting off to dangerous places.

You licked your dry lips and took off your heels that were beginning to dig painfully into your feet. As you rose, you finally took in the sight of Jungkook's apartment. It was a balance of dark and light, of vast emptiness and inviting warmth.

"I'll get you some clothes," said Jungkook as he made past you, the smell of smoke and his perfume lingering on his clothes.

You glanced at the door when Jungkook was out of sight and tried the knob but it was locked, the keypad staring at you blinkingly. You did not intend on leaving, you had nowhere to go, but just being able to have that option ...

Jungkook brought you a pair of grey sweatpants and a soft black t-shirt that you thanked him for. He showed you to the bathroom where you changed and washed off your smudged makeup. Yet once you returned, Jungkook could still see the storm of thoughts behind your eyes.

"What is it?" asked Jungkook not unkindly although his frown curved even grimmer if that was even possible.

"Am I ..." you began, not knowing how to string together the words. The answer that you might get frightened you.

Jungkook's eyes waited with expectation.

"Am I allowed to leave?" you uttered at last, your voice quiet as your gaze shifted between Jungkook's eyes and the buttons of his shirt.

"Why wouldn't you be?" asked Jungkook, a hidden sharpness in his voice that you could point out easily. In the past months, you had learned to pick up on the smallest signals and gestures that could most of the time save you from a difficult argument.

"I don't know," you tried to keep your voice loud enough for him to hear although your hands were wet with cold sweat.

Jungkook stared at you. You were avoiding his eyes, your hands if not your whole body were trembling, your shoulders tense.

"Why did you come with me if you're so scared of me?" asked Jungkook. Your eyes found his as your lips parted.

"I suppose I'm not as scared of you as I am of him," you confessed after a moment not only to Jungkook but to yourself. You looked down, ashamed that you felt that way about someone who so far did everything but hurt you.

Your eyes watered with tears and your chin quivered. You thought about everything Kang told you about Jungkook, and you thought about Kang himself; the thought of him made you sick with fever.

"I'm sorry," you whispered as you shook your head. You tried to push away the tears, tired of crying, but they fell down your cheeks anyway.

"You've been nothing but kind to me ... If it weren't for you ..." you could not even think about it. You hid your eyes behind your hand, holding back the pain in your chest.

"Fuck ..." muttered Jungkook under his breath and pulled you into his arms despite battling with himself not to do it. He could not forget the way you winced from his touch when he led you to his car, but he did not know what else to do.

You did not flinch this time, however. You welcomed the comfort of his embrace, of his arms wrapping around your frame. His chest felt warm beneath your cheek, the sound of his loud heartbeat calming you down.

You did not know how much time had passed or how long the two of you have been standing that way, but it was long enough for you to feel yourself want to fall asleep.

"I'm so tired," you whispered, your eyes closed and your hands still wrapped around Jungkook's waist.

"I know," said Jungkook quietly not to disturb you. He slipped his arms beneath you and picked you up. If you had had but an ounce of energy left, you would have argued against it and insisted to walk alone but you could no longer fight at all, not for anything.

Soon, there was a soft pillow beneath your head and the covers drawn over your shivering body. The exhaustion made you even colder than usual but you fell asleep anyway.

***

When you woke up, the pale sun was shinning into the unknown room. The walls were charcoal grey, the ceiling white with a wall of windows opening from top to bottom to your side. You sat up quickly, not remembering how you got there, not recognizing any of the furniture nor the bed. Your gaze soon fell upon the armchair in the corner of the room. The memories of last night came back to you when you saw Jungkook sleeping in the armchair. He no longer wore a tuxedo but a black hoodie and a pair of sweatpants as he lay sprawled in the armchair.

You remembered crying in Jungkook's arms and hugging him, and you were almost certain he carried you to bed. Heat rushed to your cheeks and neck, painting them red with blush as you wished for the floor to crack open and swallow you. You were rested now, at least more than last night when you were a complete mess of emotions and could think straight.

Your mind drifted to Kang as you wondered what happened at the benefit after you disappeared, the rage and uproar he must have caused.

Your elbow was even sorer than you remembered and the bruise grew darker and more menacing by the hour. You tried to touch it but the brush of fingertips alone was painful.

Although the armchair looked uncomfortable, you wanted to let Jungkook sleep. You could not stop the butterflies from awakening in your stomach when you saw him like that. His face was relaxed, his brows free from the usual frown. Jungkook's arms were crossed lazily across his chest as he breathed softly.

You slipped from the bed quietly, goosebumps rising on your arms in the cold morning air. It was misty and grey outside, the sun now gone completely. You took the soft blanket from the foot of the bed and made your way to Jungkook almost on the tips of your toes. You folded the blanket once and placed it gently over Jungkook, praying that it would not wake him up.

Jungkook remained asleep as you slipped from the guest bedroom and found the bathroom. It made you uneasy to look through his bathroom cabinet but you were in desperate need of a toothbrush. You opened one of the spare ones and borrowed a bit of toothpaste, followed by washing your face and using your fingers for comb when you suddenly heard footsteps in the hallway.

Your gaze shot up to the bathroom door and your heart jumped in your chest. It took you a moment to remind yourself that you were not at home, that you were safe, and Kang was miles away.

When you reached the kitchen, Jungkook was rubbing his tired eyes with his index and thumb as he stood before the buzzing espresso machine.

You wondered why he decided to sleep in the armchair when Jungkook turned around, feeling your gaze burn into his back.

"Hi," you said quietly, a small smile lining your lips.

"Hey," said Jungkook, his voice deep and husky like broken. Goosebumps rose on your arms.

"Coffee?" he offered, fixing his hair by running his fingers through it.

"Please," you said but felt a pang of guilt when you saw the tiredness on his face. You sat down at the counter and poured some milk into your coffee whilst Jungkook watered his espresso to an americano. Just the smell of coffee managed to bring him back from the dead some, although he yearned for a shower and a workout.

"Why did you sleep in the armchair?" you found yourself asking, unable to stop the blush from creeping to your cheeks. You bit your lip, your eyes shifting between Jungkook and your coffee.

Jungkook watched you for a moment, his eyebrows nestling in their usual frown. "You had nightmares."

"I did?" you breathed, not remembering a thing. You shivered from the cold air but you did not notice as you tried to put together the puzzles of your memory.

"You don't remember?" asked Jungkook and set down his nearly empty coffee cup. You looked up at him when his fingers went to the hem of his hoodie as he pulled it off. The t-shirt beneath it rose to the middle of his torso as he did so, sending a wave of heat to your cheeks.

"Here," said Jungkook and handed the hoodie to you.

"No, it's okay—" you reacted quickly but he cut you off.

"Take it," said Jungkook, leaving no room for arguments. You couldn't do anything else but to thank him to which he nodded absent-mindedly.

You slipped on Jungkook's hoodie, still warm and smelling like him. You sank into the comfortable material, your nose buried in the collar of the hoodie. Jungkook did not say anything for a while, making you look up with big eyes as you just woke from your thoughts.

Jungkook was watching you all the while, leaning against the counter at the hip, until your gaze finally rose to him. His dark eyes were filled with amusement, which made you blush. His lips spread into a small smile as he passed by you and headed down the hallway. You stared at his back until he disappeared from your sight, feeling your cheeks pulsate with heat.

[zoropookie]

SWEET MELODY

☆ chapter twenty — get the fuck out (🎂)

The wind was carrying a chill on his skin like it lived on his being, a cold damp fog.

The sun was sinking beneath the homes, and the evening seemed to hold his break with him. He, Ei, and Yae were standing there in front of the familiar door they've all frequented. One leading the way, calm and resolute, the other begrudgingly trailing behind her while his mind gloomed. The third? Amused, eyes glimmering with merriment at the mother-son relationship.

"I reckon you tell them that you'll leave them alone," Yae suggested. "All of it is quite petty, I'm sure they'll understand why we're here to have you two make amends anyway."

"I have no doubt that's what you think, especially since you both love to be resolute bitches about it—"

"Oh? No, continue, I'd love for you to finish that thought." Ei replied, standing tall and unmoving, face of quiet authority. After a brief interlude of his quietude, she ground her teeth. "Do not cross me, you are already in hot water."

Ei's gaze burned into him in front of that door, she knocked, the sound echoing with enough command. Kuni's throat tightened in disgust, mind racing for an immediate escape, any way out of this predicament, but Ei was always one to play her cards well. He was trapped here whether he liked it or not.

The door opened slowly upon looking through the peep hole, revealing you, who looked at all three of them with weariness. "Hello..." You said awkwardly, but there wasn't much of a smile on your face than usual. Kuni's heart skipped a beat, and there was a heavier feeling to the air that he couldn't shake from you. It was easy talking shit to them on the phone, but when he knew something was wrong here, it was strange.

"We won't take up much of your time, I apologize if we burdened you right now!" Yae chirped. "I'm so glad to see you yet again. You get cuter and cuter each time I see you, (Y/N). Like a little button."

You didn't know how to respond to that, frankly, except with a half-hearted smile. Your eyes moved back to the other two, your heart dropping at the situation. Ei's grip on Kuni's hair was sudden and firm, her thin fingers weaving through his mauve filaments with a controlled ease. She forced his head down, tugging him into a bow.

"No more. No more fighting, no more altercations. Apologize, Kunikuzushi," She said, her tone ironclad. "For all of it."

He bit the inside of his cheek, losing the hope he had for this going how he wanted it. He refused to let his own pride be threatened as it roared in seething rebellion. Up his neck creeped humiliation, but his mother's grip tightened. She refused to let go. His head still bowed, he forced the words out, all of the syllables dripping from his lips were involuntary.

"You've been through a lot because of me. I shouldn't have done what I have, and maybe I should have also realized that when I was doing it. I'm still learning how to regulate, it doesn't come to me naturally." Kuni said, hollow, half-hearted. He couldn't help it. Every tendril of his being wanted to rip away from how pathetic this display looked.

He felt their gazes on him, like a lion in a circus, studying his every move and reaction, waiting for him to crack under his own ego. "Oh, you think that's enough?" Yae said, tilting her head. "You're still acting as if this is a game, but there's no place for them anymore. How unfortunate."

"...We will move on from this. Please consider forgiving me in the future, when your heart allows it." Kuni hissed through clenched teeth, fist trembling at his sides. Fury boiled under his skin, but he kept his eyes locked on the ground like he was commanded, avoiding eye contact, wincing at his mother's nails digging into him. "Let me go. You're fucking hurting me."

"Words. All words, but I haven't heard an actual apology yet." Ei replied calmly.

You didn't know how to react still, all of this rushed in your face like it was a surge of energy. You seemed calm and measured, but looking at how your ex-boyfriend was being handled by his mother yet again, watching him struggle with the prospect of even apologizing to you, knowing that you hardly deserved one yourself...it was hard. Too much to deal with right now.

Your heart tightened, eyebrows furrowing as you avoided eye contact with Kuni as well. "...This seems like a waste of time. Get home safely." You said, the emotional storm raging moments before in your mind was rid of promptly, more stoic and irritable with your speech. You turned around, shutting the door quickly behind you, cutting through that moment with air taut like a wire.

To what you thought was normal, infuriated him. Kuni's teeth grinded together, his eyes darkening in annoyance. The way you said that so casually, like you just washed your hands for ten seconds of the entire ordeal and left it. Like you were already miles away from him, digging under his skin tauntingly. You got the last word in, watching him be humiliated under the guise that you deserved that forgiveness.

He couldn't stand it. Being dragged here, forced to grovel, after he had swallowed his own dignity while it tasted raw and bitter in his throat. Spitting out an apology to you...one you hardly had any business responding to. You dismissed him, as if none of what he did matter. As if he didn't matter. It was gnawing at his core, left sweltering in his mess.

His movements were stiff and jerky as he followed the two women to the car, silently fuming. You were not going to take control of what he thought he was warranted.

It was surreal to think that the remains of your brother were in your hands rather than his own arms encompassing you. In those warm, now unfamiliar feeling hugs he gave you.

The day had been spent finalizing the plans for Kazuha's funeral. The weight of your heartache overwhelmed you a lot, especially when Kuni and his family stopped by. The bakery had closed for the day, and your employees, more like family than staff, had insisted on joining you as moral support. You didn't feel comfortable with their continuous acts of kindness towards you, but you accepted anyway. Who were you to deny any more help, anyway?

It was a private funeral, bringing you strange comfort barely anyone except other family members and distant friends knew about it. Their faces softening the edges of your overall sorrow.

You sat in front of the altar with tired eyes, rubbing them to rid of your tears and to ebb the exhaustion. Your hands shook as they rested on the smooth, cold surface of the urn that held his ashes. It wasn't real to you, the only one after your mother's death who was always able to help you live in quiet grace, had been reduced to this. You lived yet again in your sorrow, except extra this time.

With no energy left to think about anything else, the details crafted with care in Kazuha's funeral spoke wonders. The cherry blossoms arranged, incense burning softly, candles delicately flaring. There was nothing left to distract you from the possibility that he was gone.

The filling air of sandalwood neighboring the air while the incense curled smoke into the room. White lilies around a large photograph of Kazuha that you had to retrieve from your mothers room. No longer dusty, but the sanctity of the promise that you kept to Kazuha disappearing as well. You didn't even want to look at it, feeling the sense of betrayal rotten your heart with guilt. He was in the peak of his youth, eyes bright with the amicable, ethereal tranquility of his beaming face. A smile so gentle and sincere, haunting you forever. You never saw the photo before this, and now that you have, it'll follow you like a ghost.

Your flood gates cracked and spurted out, until your tears began to pour out uncontrollably again. Sobs raw and aching as your entire body wracked, echoing through the mildly quiet room. Your body was heavy to you, every bone in your body converting to stone, with a misery so sagacious that you weren't sure if you were stuck there for the next few minutes or hours.

Weeping like a baby, allowing your tears to drip onto your clothes, the memories you could never share with him again, for the future planned that would never come to pass. He died in the past, the reassurance he left you with when you were just breaking up with your ex-boyfriend and you were shattered once again. But not like this, not like how you wept for the moments you had taken for granted with your family. For the times you assumed you would have more time.

Xingqiu, Chongyun, Bennett, Beidou, and Gaming stayed there beside you, presence warm but quiet as they ruminated in the sorrow themself. One by one, they knelt beside you and bowed their heads in respect to the memory of Kazuha, a quiet prayer escaping their lips every now and then that you could hear.

"It's okay," Beidou softly whispered, rubbing your back. "It's okay to take your time. There's nothing wrong with taking a break, kid. Feel out your emotions."

"To you." You choked out, tone exerting a little snappy.

As Beidou's eyebrows raised, your gaze sharpened as you stared at the photo again. This time, a glint of hopelessness and null in your expression.

"I genuinely hope that none of you ever have to feel what it's like to come home, and be crushed by your own dejection. To feel like there's a giant anchor pressing down on your chest, every single second. Pummeling you from the inside out, stripping you down until you're weaker and weaker." Your voice trembled, leaving the rest of them quiet again. "I don't have the luxury to feel out my emotions, or I crumble again. I'm so tired of crumbling."

The following days, the bakery remained open after the funeral. You didn't give yourself time to exactly take a long break. It should have been expected of you, or forced, but the rest of the employees figured it would a better idea to let you do what you need to do to cope with it.

The bakery was dimly lit, with the television in the corner of the room playing Balladeer and the Cult's new music video for the fourth time today. The entire staff were quiet other than the frequent chatter, and the soft clinking of dishes as the workers cleaned up for the night. It was the kind of silence that would tell tales of wonders involving your situation. You were in the back, wrapping everything up and making sure you wrote what needed to be stocked for the morning.

"I like when they do that fun lyrical thing that starts with 'I had my pants on my head like a hat', and ends with...'the police department's refusal to comply in a timely manner with open records request is a middle finger to the marginalized'. You know what I'm saying?" Gaming rambled.

"No clue." Xingqiu said dully.

"They have to make the feds give up early on the song, so they turn it off before they get to the part that calls it out." Chongyun grinned.

"It's like when you steal sandwich bags from the burger shop across the street, and you think the sandwich bags have shit in it, right? No. The entire layout to a compartment of different type of bombs located in Natlan."

"Why are you stealing sandwich bags from them? I'm telling." Xingqiu's eyes narrowed. "Snitching to the court."

"You do that, and I'm not letting you use my Dreamcast anymore. I'm tired of you ratting me out." Gaming scrunched his face up before walking to the back to clean the kitchen with Beidou.

The atmosphere was considerably lax, but there was always a shade of apprehension all of them shared with your newfound attitude. You forced yourself to focus on closing, the others trying to keep a bright side about them. You could only target yourself to think about Kazuha, the pain of absence. Knowing that when you go home, he'll be there, but not as a physical body.

The sound of the front slamming open jarred everybody who heard it, the small bell above the door rattling aggressively against its frame. Chongyun stiffened at the abrupt sound, it being cut short as they all turned toward the person who walked in. The boy's jaw dropped, blinking twice to make sure if who he's seeing wasn't the guy who was just on TV.

"Uh—" He wanted to keep his wits about him and start spilling fan-made excitement, but he was too floored to even do that. "We're...about to close, sir!"

"Not here for bread, or whatever the fuck you guys have. Fetch (Y/N)."

Xingqiu's eyebrows furrowed. "They're...not here right now. If you want to talk to them, come back tomorrow, we'll be open for a while."

"Oh, are they not? Crazy, considering I see their car behind the lot. I checked, don't think I'm one of your little customers." Kuni cut him off, voice dripping with venom as he sized the workers up. "I'm not in the mood. Either go get them now, or I'll run through all of you."

Chongyun hesitated, awkwardly turning his body towards Xingqiu who shrugged in response. He headed towards the back to relay the information, while you were still working. When he reached you, his voice went quiet while he told you what was going on, almost apologetic. Your blood ran cold.

There was an anger that swelled in your chest, hands squeezing into fists. Without a word, you stormed out quickly, expression set with burning fury. The sight of him again, this time in casual clothing and a neutral demeanor, your vision blurred with rage and small guilt. "Why are you here?!" Your voice shook with rage, your voice could barely raise at him. "Haven't you done enough?"

"Have I done enough? Understand this, you bitch," He immediately started coming closer to you. "You're not off the hook for what you did. You may be used to people forgiving you instantly after batting your eyelashes and giggling like fucking Minnie Mouse, but I'm not the one.

"Okay? Then, what do you want from me?!" You grit your teeth. "You say all this, and then have a hard time not being vague. What is it?! Tell me!"

"Coddled your entire life, skipping out on your responsibilities because things got a little hard," He took a step closer, which lead for you to open the distance again. Except this time, his hand swiped the entire row of glasses that were on display down on the wooden floor with a loud crash. Your eyes widened. "Now you get to stay here, complacent in my misery, just because you think you deserve it? I'll take all this shit away from you."

His anger marinated long enough, it bubbled to the surface like a volcano ready to erupt. His chest was tight looking at you, suffocating in his grip of emotions he buried deep for too long. Enough was enough, he felt sick with the flour and sugar clinging to every surrounding. Everything was quiet to him here, too perfect. And for him, wrong.

A sneer warped his lips, and there were more crashes. The noise cut through the bakery, the workers flinching, but you couldn't even move. Beidou immediately ran to the front, her face twisted into rage. "Get the fuck out, now! You have no business being in here."

She was about to rush over to kick him out, but you shook your head, subduing her form from going closer. "You're not mad because of me, get your facts straight before you start talking to me like that."

His chest heaved at that, and he could only laugh. The sound of his ragged breaths became aggressive, grabbing at dishes and sending them all careening across the floor with a brutal snap of his wrist. "All of this shit," Another one, the sound harsh against the floor. "ALL OF IT, I want all the good things to fucking rot for the part you played in ruining the good things we had."

Your heart pounded in your ears in moderate fear, louder than the crashes and the gasps coming from the rest of your workers. You felt yourself become suffocated, like there was thick smoke restricting you. Everything felt too tight, your skin and the walls of the bakery itself. He kept shattering your things, breaking every single item that came across his path. There were crimson cuts on his hand, the bleeding on his hands and the glass embedded on his skin making you flinch. He welcomed it.

"Deluding yourself with all of this! You're fucking delusional!" He screamed in your face, "Why can't you wake up and take fucking charge of your own destiny, rather than following a dream you made up because you don't want to be reminded that HE'S FUCKING DEAD. WHERE ARE YOU?"

You could only laugh at him, feeling your cheeks burn from how flustered you were. "Get out." Your voice was dangerously low, trembling as you barely controlled your fury. Those words poisoned you, and tears immediately started rolling down your face, lip quivering.

Kuni just stood there, taking in your words as his breath labored, chest heaving up and down, eyes scanning you in disbelief. But you couldn't stand to see him anymore, because you knew what he was saying about you was true. You grabbed your own glass from the counter and hurled it at him, "Get out," smash, "GET out," smash, "GET THE FUCK OUT."

You grabbed another, and another, before entirely ridding of the glass pieces and started throwing chairs at him for him to swiftly dodge. Your hands were shaking uncontrollably, feeling humiliated that you were losing your mind in front of your employees, but you could not do this anymore. "You didn't want to see me anymore, right?! You've got it. Get out! I don't EVER want to see you again."

"So he is dead?" He taunted, voice lower as he started laughing too, his throat hardly making out the sound while it only came out choked as well, too stunned to care. "How's that fantasy working out for you now? At least persistence is a great substitute for actual talent."

Your knuckled connected with his jaw as soon as he leaned in closer, and you fucked him up hard. Sound coming off as a dull thud, followed by a grunt coming from Kuni's throat. You got him in between his lips and the center of his nostrils, causing the crimson blood to sputter immediately once he stepped back. He held onto his nose, instinctively going for his face while his liquid red stained exterior dripped.

The bruise was already beginning to form where your punch had landed. He hadn't expected you to fight back, but something flickered in his eyes. Something that wasn't rage this time, but delightfulness? You stood there, panting, your own hand now pained from how hard the clash was. "Leave," Your voice cracked. "Leave...before I do something worse."

It was obviously a serious reaction, he realized it by the time you were screaming at him. So as the adrenaline dissipated, the power of everything hit him all at once, and he narrowed in on your tear-filled gaze with incredulous relief.

"Welcome back." His pride fought him again to say anything else, so he wiped the blood on his lip, and turned on his heel to leave.

previous ☆ masterlist ☆ next

THERE ARE not many things that can sway your interest ever since the "incident", but in spite of that, you pushed forward. you are now the owner of the biggest bakery chain in your city, consistently seeing couples and catering to them as such. you've been a big host at weddings, events for celebrities, and even a big support for your friends and family. you've even earned yourself a niche following as well by how sweet you are to everybody around you. but, even with your kindness, you don't have a particular spark that keeps you going anymore these days. that is until one of your employees starts suggesting you write love letters to customers who request your services. at first you thought it was a horrible idea that could easily turn into trouble, but that was until you were tasked with writing one to your own (very very famous) ex-boyfriend.

taglist ☆ — @seternic @chemiru @coquettemaiden @1kio0o @emiixuu

@agaygothicmushroom @yomishen @jingyuan-wife-real @toruscorpse @whoooismkeee

@sketcheeee @st4r4ngel @xionri @scaradooche @lightyagamifan

@pwushizz @alatusorrow @eutopiastar @magica-ren @slu7

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@balladeersflower @kazumiku @bananasquash @neversore @yevurin

@franaby @vicslz @kamiboo @thegalaxyisunfolding @morgyyyyyyy

@feikyuu @tamikahoshiko @kissingkzuha @bbysatoruuu @rvoulte

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@suniika @animeobsessed56 @kamisstufff @samyayaya @scarawiki

@mywillt0live @lxkeeeee @sundays-prince @imnotyizhuo

[bodybahng]

consider it a treat (request)

masterlist

word count: 0.9k

pairing: han jisung x gender neutral reader

warnings: none, just teeth rotting fluff

a/n: where can i find a hanji? 🥹

if you don’t have an age indicator in your bio or pinned, you’ll be blocked. minors do not interact.

the thud of something falling on the ground woke you up from your afternoon nap, with the culprit looking wide eyed at you, downturned eyebrows exuding guilt.

“y/n, i’m so sorry, i didn’t mean to wake you up,” jisung spoke quickly and quietly, crouching down to pick up his phone. his eyes softened when he saw you stretching and yawning, hair going in all directions. “was it a good nap?”

“until someone woke me up,” you joked, sitting up and fixing the mess on your head as best as you could without a mirror. “but it was even better that i got to wake up to your cute face, even if it wasn’t right next to me.”

he attempted to hide his shy smile by ducking his head, but you’d already seen it. “i tried to sleep, but i was feeling a little antsy so i went to play some guitar in my studio room.”

“that’s okay, i’m just poking fun at you.” you chuckled, reaching for your phone and checking the time. “well, we still have two hours to kill before the party… do you wanna do something?”

“i’m not sure if there will be anything to eat there, wanna order something now?” he suggested, sitting on the edge of his bed and trying to hold back a smile when you hugged him from behind to peep over his shoulder.

jisung was scrolling through the app, clicking on his favourite restaurant since you’d ordered from yours last night. things were always easy with him, there was no indecisiveness or doubt because you usually fell into a rhythm that both of you were satisfied with, always taking turns to make sure your wants and needs were equally attended.

“what do you want? the usual?” he turned his head slightly to the side, flinching and blushing a little when he noticed how close your face was.

“mhm,” you hummed, placing a quick peck to the tip of his nose. “i’ll pay you back tomorrow, ‘kay?”

“don’t worry about it, today’s on me.”

“ji, we’ve talked about this,” you tried arguing, but he carefully turned his body to face yours as your arms let him go. “if you insist on paying every time, i’ll never be able to and that’s not fair.”

“i know, it’s just this once, i promise.” his eyes roamed all over your face, as if to silently worship all the small details he’d memorised long ago. “consider it a treat to my prettiest…friend.”

the hesitance in his voice didn’t go unnoticed by you. this flirting game you played wasn’t new at all and you were aware that friends, too, can joke like this, but this wasn’t the case. you always noticed the way his gaze lingered on you when he thought you weren’t watching or when he quickly dropped his eyes to your mouth before going back up to your eyes, thinking he was being subtle. so any feelings of ‘is he really interested in me like that?’ faded away long ago.

“you’re the cutest guy i know,” you answered, ruffling his hair in an attempt to get rid of the tension that was making its presence between you.

“that you know? so there’s a chance of a cuter guy you haven’t met yet being out there?” you could tell he was only being playful, but you still didn’t want him to have any reasons to believe that was true.

“that’d be impossible,” you said while letting your hand drop to his nape, caressing the strands that were beginning to cover it.

jisung didn’t know where he got the courage from, maybe it was your close proximity or how your foot had been gently rubbing against his when you’d adjusted your position to sit beside him, but he only fully realised what he was doing when he heard your breath hitching.

“y/n…” he whispered, hot air hitting your lips with him almost touching them. he had one hand on your waist and the other was cupping your face softly, silently hoping for the distabce between you to be nonexistent.

“kiss me.” you didn’t wait for him to ask, feeling your body burning with need for him.

you didn’t have time to feel embarrassed about the low moan that got out of you once his lips were finally on yours because he did the same, showing just how much you were both dreaming about this moment for a long time.

he didn’t want to waste any second, tongue gently asking for permission, and you swore time stood still as you felt all of him against you. his front was glued to yours, the kiss both urgent and filled with tenderness.

“fuck, i can’t believe we waited this long…” you breathed into his lips, pressing a few more delicate pecks before fully pulling away to look at his giddy expression.

“the real deal was so much better than all of those times i imagined it,” jisung confessed, giggling as heat rose to your cheeks. “i’m glad i don’t have to rely on that anymore.”

“is that your way of saying you wanna kiss me again?” you yelped as he grabbed your leg and swiftly helped you straddle his lap, biting his own lip in the process.

“it surely is. do you?” he still wanted to check that it hadn’t been just an impulse and a one time thing for you, always being considerate of your feelings before acting on his own. you didn’t need to say anything else, instead letting another kiss answer for you.

the two of you stayed just like that, lazily kissing and feeling comfortable with each other, until the doorbell rang indicating your food had arrived. you sent jisung on his way with giggles as he didn’t seem to want to let you go for even a second.

[37sommz]

000.⠀⠀NOW PLAYING: long live [1.5k, angst]. ✼. view: masterlist⠀⸻⠀join the taglist⠀⸻⠀request. ✼. synopsis: michaela says goodbye. ✼. notes: totally heartbroken for daniel. for all he's done for this sport, he truly deserved so much more than what he got. enchanté, daniel. ✼. warnings: daniel's last race, crying. not proofread, but when do i ever?

✼.⠀SEPTEMBER 22, 2024 — marina bay, singapore

Michaela gripped the steering wheel of her Aston Martin as she rounded the streets of Marina Bay. The roar of the engine filled her ears as she sped through the tight turns of the track, the city lights of Singapore blurring into a dizzying spray of color beyond the tire barriers. The air held anticipation and the smell of an uneasy question. She had heard the whispers all weekend, the murmurs that danced just out of earshot. Daniel Ricciardo, the man who had practically become part of her family, might not be in the paddock much longer. Her heart raced, not just from the exhilaration of the race, but from the thought of losing a piece of her world.

The checkered flag dropped, and she pulled into the pit lane. The chaos of the grandstands and the flashing lights of cameras were a harsh, ironic contrast to the turmoil storming within her. She stepped out of the car, forcing a smile for the cameras as she went through the motions of the post-race interviews. She had done well, finishing 5th to Fernando's 4th, but the success felt hollow. Her thoughts remained with Daniel, who had just completed his final lap for the Bulls. She had avoided him all weekend, the weight of his potential departure too much to bear. But now, as the race concluded and the tension began to ease, she knew she had to see him.

Michaela walked to Daniel's side of the RB garage, her heart thumping like the British engine she had just left behind in her own garage. She pushed open the door and found him surrounded by his team, sharing a bittersweet moment. His eyes met hers and she saw the unshed tears glittering underneath the fluorescent lights. He tried to flash his signature grin, but it faltered, and she knew the truth had sunk in for both of them. The laughter lines around his eyes didn't hide the pain. He was saying his goodbyes, and she had missed most of it.

As the last of the well-wishers left, Daniel turned to his car, running a hand over its gleaming carbon fiber bodywork. She approached him tentatively, her eyes brimming with tears she hadn't realized she'd been holding back. He looked at her, his own eyes red and glassy.

"Hey, kid," he said, his voice thick with emotion.

She took a step closer, feeling the warmth of the engine's last breath radiating off the car.

"Couldn't stay away, huh?" He tried to laugh, but it came out as a choked sob.

Michaela's own tears spilled over, tracing paths down her cheeks. "Daniel, I'm so sorry," she whispered, reaching out to lay a hand on his shoulder.

He leaned into her touch, his eyes never leaving the car that had been his life for so many seasons. "It's alright, Mick. It's just racing, right?" Even in his most vulnerable moment, Daniel couldn't fight the instinct to comfort the girl he had watched grow into a woman.

Michaela felt the warmth of his voice wrap around her like a familiar blanket, but the words didn't bring the relief she sought.

 "No, it's not just racing," she said, her voice trembling. "You've been there for me, through all the tough times, the crashes, the doubt, the fights to be taken seriously in this sport." She swallowed hard, her eyes searching his for understanding. "You've been my rock, my inspiration. You can't just leave. Not like this."

Daniel turned to face her, his smile sad but earnest. "Mick, you know this isn't the end. I'll still be around, driving Courie crazy.” 

The reference to Michaela’s sister, Daniel’s girlfriend—his Courie—stuck watching the race from her lab in Sydney only brought a knot to Michaela’s stomach. Michaela had spoken briefly to her sister before the race, Courtney had been inconsolable over the phone, pushed beyond guilt that she couldn’t be by her boyfriend’s side to help shoulder the emotions during the last race of his Formula 1 career.

“And you," he continued, pointing at her, "You're gonna kill it out there without me."

Michaela couldn't hold back anymore. She stepped forward and wrapped her arms around him in a tight embrace, feeling the coarse fabric of his fireproofs and the solidity of his frame. He hugged her back, his own arms enveloping her in a comforting warmth she hadn't realized she needed. They stood there for a moment, two friends sharing the weight of a career's crossroads, their hearts beating in sync with the rhythm of the cooling engines around them.

"Thank you," she murmured into his shoulder. "For everything."

"You can thank me when you win a championship," Daniel said, his voice breaking despite himself.

Michaela pulled back, wiping at her eyes. "It should've been you first," she said, her voice thick with emotion. "You should've been a champion." Her tears continue to fall, her cheeks stained by the path they leave on her skin.

"Maybe, but don't worry about me," Daniel said, his eyes glistening. "You still have your whole career ahead of you."

Michaela nodded, her vision blurred by the tears. "I know, but it won't be the same without you."

The silence grew heavy in the garage, punctuated only by the occasional clang of tools being packed away. The reality of Daniel's departure was setting in, a stark reminder of the fleeting nature of their sport.

"You know, I never thought I'd be leaving like this," Daniel said, his gaze still on the car. "But I guess that's how it goes when you get too attached to the ride."

Michaela nodded, her throat tight. "It's not fair," she said, her voice barely a whisper. "You're one of the best out there."

"Life's not about fair," Daniel replied, his hand coming up to ruffle her hair, a gesture that brought a ghost of a smile to her face. "But it's about making the most of what you've got. And I guess I've gotta get a new thing now."

Michaela stepped back, taking in the sight of her friend, his shoulders slumped and his usual vibrant spirit dulled by the shadow of his uncertain farewell. She felt a pang of anger at the unfairness of it all. Daniel had given so much to Formula 1, and yet, it seemed to be discarding him as if a worn-out tire. But she knew better than to let her the weight of her emotions sweep her up, not here, not now. She took a deep breath, straightening her spine.

"You're right," she said, her voice steady despite the tremble in her chest. "We've got to make the most of it. And you," she poked his arm gently, "Have got more to give, more to show the world. Whatever's next, you'll shine just like you always do."

Daniel offered a weak smile, his eyes glistening with unshed tears. "Thanks, Mick." He paused, taking in the sight of the emptying garage, his team packing up the last of his gear.

"I just thought I'd be here for a little longer, you know? When I left Red Bull for Renault I thought that my time was next, that I was gonna be the one on the top step for once. Then McLaren called and I fuckin'—" He choked back further tears. "I felt like that was it. But when it never came I just..."

He trailed off, the heartbroken look in his eyes drawing Michaela deeper into her melancholy. Michaela nodded solemnly, understanding the ache in his words. "You're so much more than that, Daniel. You brought your joy to so many people. I know for sure that you've got so much left to give. And you will, in whatever you do next." She took a deep breath, trying to compose herself.

"You've taught me so much," she continued, her voice cracking. "How to keep pushing when everything is useless and I feel like giving up. How to laugh when the world is against your joy. How to be a better driver to my team and a better person to the people I love. I wouldn't still be here if it weren't for you. So, thank you Daniel. So, so much."

"You're going to be okay, you hear me?" He said, his voice gruff with emotion. "You're going to be more than okay."

Michaela nodded, trying to hold onto his words like a lifeline in the storm of her feelings. Daniel took a step back and wiped his own eyes with the back of his hand. "But for now," he said, his voice firming up, "Let's go grab a drink. You know, to celebrate the end of an era and all that fuzzy shit."

They laughed through their tears, a bit of the old familiar banter slipping back in. They walked out of the garage together, leaving the echoes of their past successes and heartaches behind. The paddock was alive with the sounds of teams breaking down and preparing for the next race. 

Yet, for them, the world had slowed down to an unwilling crawl.

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@sunfairyy

[hwnglx]

i actually liked his energy a lot, it was quite clear and direct. hope it's a nice read!

eunseok's real personality behind the scenes

based on tarot. i do not know these idols personally. energies are always changing. what i say is NOT straight fact. pls take it with a grain of salt!

shuffled song: anchor by novo amor

+ eunseok is incredibly strong. he knows and understands the power of hard work, and is not the type to back down from a challenge. he's the type to work quietly but immensely hard, especially if he's assigned with a task. he's amazing at fiercely concentrating and zoning on what he needs to do, and doesn't allow any circumstances to stand in the way of him getting done what needs to be done. in my minds eye, i kept seeing him and the riize members in the practice room together while he was clapping his hands and saying ”정신 차려 얘들아!” which translates to “lets concentrate, guys!” he very much gives me second leader vibes. who just displays this rock and source of stability for the rest of the group. the capricorn moon energy is strong for him.

his energy is also very self-sacrificing and unselfish. he's a person blessed with a good connection to his inner voice and intuition, very emotionally intelligent guy. this results in him naturally attuning himself and his actions to the various needs of the people he's surrounded with; just a lot of focus and value on team harmony. he doesn't put his own desires above anyone, and understands the benefit of adapting himself to the group, for the sake of smooth teamwork.

another quality adding to this pronounced selflessness in eunseok, is his ability to put his own negative emotions aside for the sake of other people. this is something i've observed and heard about capricorn moons; they can often give off this stoic and phlegmatic vibe, where it seems like nothing truly affects them.. however, this isn't due to them not actually having any feelings, but moreso because they put responsibility and stability over their own emotions. meaning, they don't always allow themselves to really dive into their emotions, because they feel this innate responsibility to become a source of stability for others, which makes them suck their own tears in and remain calm.

eunseok does have his moments of disappointment, regret, insecurity; but instead of crying it out, he can have the habit of rationalising it. let's say the group is in a moment of despair and most members are heavily caught up in emotion; it's highly likely for eunseok to be the guy with a dry face, trying to comfort his members and get them to calm down. i can even see him being a source of support to the leader sungchan, who strikes me as much more emotionally out there.

it's interesting because on the one hand, he can be very headstrong and determined in his actions, but on the other hand he can also approach situations with this calm patience, when needed. he's just very adaptable, and not someone who gets knocked out of his flow easily. it's like, he doesn't mind life coming at him because he knows he can handle everything with his calm and composed attitude.

having that said, eunseok still isn't an easy or defenceless guy. if the need to speak up presents itself in a situation, he will be ready to defend himself and hold his ground no doubt about it. again, there seems to be an abundance of inner strength and resilience in him, which also showcases itself in his excellent ability to remain determined, driven, perseverant and persistent. he stands by his opinions, isn't gullible or easily swayed, and knows how to push through challenges in a powerful manner.

- so, eunseok is impressingly mature, and gives me this vibe of someone who had to grow up quite fast. maybe that's the reason why he's the type of person to burden himself with responsibilities not everyone expects from him. to explain, riize are still very much like the page of pentacles here. at the beginning of their journey, still trying to find their way, inevitably inexperienced and slightly awkward or insecure in some areas still, but very ambitious and eager to develop in their journey. that's completely normal. however, eunseok is already putting the weight of having to be like the emperor on top of him, because he again, feels like he needs to be a stable existence for the group or the people around him. this desire of helping and being the mature person, comes to him very naturally; so much so, that he just isn't the type to allow himself to be vulnerable and insecure sometimes. he always feels the need to step up and be the strong guy, and can dismiss a lot of his own troubles or concerns due to this.

the moon afterwards is telling me, he just hides and buries many of his own fears and worries inside of him, and can tend to disguise them behind a strong demeanour. he can be very hard on himself and not allow himself to break at any given moment, which makes it even more frustrating for his mind if he ever gets to a point of mental anguish. there's also this sense of.. “if i ever have a problem, that is my burden to deal with, and not anyone else's weight to carry” he doesn't like the thought of anyone holding the weight of his own emotions, so he can be very dismissive of his insecurities.

he can not only be hard on himself, but also quite strict with the people around him. he just keeps giving me this father-like energy, where he wants to keep guiding and leading people. i can however sense him potentially having difficulty controlling his tone of voice once he gets into a disagreement, and just wording himself in a way which can be kinda rigid and hurtful. he can can come off controlling, overly strict and harsh, in a way that could potentially bruise people of more sensitive nature, or bother people who easily feel constricted by people like that. his actual intentions are good, but he can put himself into a position where they could be easily misunderstood.

it does seem as though he himself is aware of this habit of his, because he's very introspective and reflects on his actions. yet he can get avoidant at times, and might have problems being honest about his faults. although inside he knows he was wrong, he puts himself in a position where he could be blamed for not wanting to own up to his wrongdoings. i do think ego and pride plays a role here too, since i can see a dilemma between his values of holding himself accountable, but also wanting to avoid the bruise to the ego, that could be caused from potentially admitting his mistake.

[prentissluvr]

sam would be the best boyfriend when ur on ur period, he’d immediately know what to do, he’d go to the store and buy you what ever pads and/or tampons you need, snacks, everything. there’d definitely be a time where he’d make a little gift basket out of the stuff and it’s just so cute. he fills you a hot water bottle, lets you braid his hair (he claims to not like it but he deffo does), he lays your head like where his bellybutton is and plays with your hair whilst talking to you in a velvety voice and gives you so many cuddles and tells you how beautiful you are if you get bloated or breakout or anything and gives you lots of kisses on your body wherever you’re comfortable with it

-💽

babydoll you sent this at the perfect time!! because i just got my period yesterday lolll so i was totally thinking about this <33

tw mentions of throwing up, passing out, and overall bad period pain rip lol

i like to think about how younger sam had almost no idea about periods. he probably heard things here and there about it whenever he was able to be in school, maybe even learned about it on his own because he's a curious, intelligent, and kind sweet boy!! but he's never very close with an afab person until he meets jess. he's naturally sweet and caring, so he learns quickly with her.

so when he's with you, he's ready and prepared to be the best boyfriend in the world. he learns what you need specifically and what you like best and it ingrains it in his memory!! (crying i know this isn't about samjess but everything is about samjess to me, so i'm thinking about the fact that he still remembers what jess liked the most :((( sobbing . like what if the first time you text him to pick up pads or something, he unconsciously grabs the kind she'd buy before remembering he can just ask what you want. he probably knows your favorite candies by then, so he doesn't think to grab jess's, but he does remember. i just love them a lot SORRY) ANYWAYS !!!

i'm crying at the idea of sam only letting you braid his hair when you're on your period because you'll get upset if he doesn't LOL but that he secretly really likes it and would totally let you do it any other time if you ask him sweetly enough. (he's down bad and will do anything that you want. he caves so easy). and he like. feels like he should be playing with your hair instead, but he knows that playing with his hair calms you so he just sits there in utter contentment like. wow i'm soooo in love with them :,)

AGH laying on his belly makes me so :(((( that's when he gets to play with your hair to relax you <3 wahhh and i'm crying about how assuring he is with you <333 he's so so incredibly sweet and just pours on the compliments when he knows that you need them. so so so many kisses!!!

and on the topic of laying on tummies <3 for some people, pressure makes cramps feel better. and i just imagine sam absolutely melting and wanting to CRY at how in love and endeared he is with you if you ask him to lay his head on your tummy to help with the pain. while he's there, he'll tell stories and gently massage your legs or just lightly rub over your sweet skin <3

speaking of massages i think he's the bEST at giving them!! his hands are so big, which helps massively, and then his touch is so gentle, yet steady and it is just so completely soothing <3 he loves being able to take even a little bit of your pain away. and he hatesss to see you in any pain he's so :((( so he does everything in his power to make it as bearable as he can!!!

ofc everyone has different experiences with their periods, but i know that in the hunting context, i personally would have such a shit ass time with my period because i doubt it'd be too easy to get birth control to tame my horrible cramps. so i think about how concerned sammy is when he realizes just how bad it can get :( headcanon that jess probably got pretty bad period cramps too but i can imagine she had access to birth control or meds to help out, so when he sees you in so so much pain he's so so worried :((

he feels soo so awful seeing you throw up or get faint or even pass out from the pain because he knows he can't fix it. so instead he's just so so caring and soft and perfect about it. especially if it gets this bad for you, he's extra careful to keep track of your period to make sure that you're never going to be doing anything strenuous during that time. if you're in pain while on the road, he gets in the back seat with you to hold you and put his warm hands on your belly until you can stop at the nearest gas station to get you a hot water bottle or something for the pain. he's perfect and i love him so much and i need need need him to take care of me while i'm on my period lol

[tikosblogg]

Come Undone

Summary: Best Friend Noah🥰

Warning: Fist fight, cussing, unprotected piv (plz don’t do that), mention of drug use.

A/N: Yall I have had writers block so bad…I’m so sorry if this is garbage. I really tired 😭💜

I stood by the bonfire, my heart pounding in time with the crackling flames. The glow illuminated the faces of my friends—Noah, Nicholas, Folio, and Jolly—each one lost in the bliss of the moment. I couldn’t help but steal glances at Noah.

He was tall, lean, adorned with tattoos that coiled like vines up his neck and across his arms. In the dim light, he seemed to radiate strength. Noah. My best friend, my secret crush, oblivious to the feelings that swirled within me. I ignored them, pushed them down for so long…but it’s useless.

Folio and Jolly were perched on the tailgate of Folio's truck, while Noah and Nicholas loomed nearby, their laughter blending with the music drifting from speakers hidden in the crowd. With every chuckle, my heart fluttered. I wanted to tell Noah how I felt, to lay bare the secrets of my heart. Yet, every time I opened my mouth to speak, the words shriveled into silence. What if I ruined our friendship? What if he didn’t feel the same?

As I shook off my doubts, that’s when she arrived. Jordan. The name sent icy tendrils down my spine, conjuring memories of high school torment. There she was—strutting towards us like she owned the night, her shimmering hair catching the glow of the fire. She was the embodiment of the girl who made my life a living hell, and tonight she had chosen to swoop into my world once more.

"Hey, Noah!" she smiled, leaning against the side of Folio's truck with a flirtatious smile, as she playfully tugged at the hem of his hoodie, that instantly soured my stomach. "What’s a guy like you doing with a bunch of misfits?"

Laughter erupted in the group, but all I could focus on was the heat creeping up my neck. I could pretend I didn’t feel the flames of jealousy licking at my insides; I could act like I wasn’t feeling small and insignificant next to the Amazonian figure of Jordan. My fingers clenched and unclenched at my sides, desperate for release.

Noah chuckled awkwardly, side-eyeing me for a moment. "Just enjoying a bonfire. Nice to see you, Jordan." He nodded, taking a step back from her.

She leaned closer, her voice dripping with malice. "You could have a lot more fun with me" Then she turned her gaze to me, a wicked smile blooming on her lips. "What’s Roxy doing hanging out with all the boys? Shouldn't she be off somewhere shooting up with her mommy?”

Everyone was silent. Eyes widened in shock. The reaction was instantaneous, the alcohol coursing through my veins igniting a fire of courage I didn’t know I had. The scars from high school throbbed, and before I even registered what I was doing, I was stepping forward. “Say it again,” I demanded, my voice steady in its resolve. A quiet “oh shit” coming from somewhere behind me.

Jordan laughed, a sound that was anything but genuine. “What? You didn’t hear me?” She gave a fake pout, which only infuriated me further. "I said, 'Shouldn't you be off shooting up with your mother? Or maybe picking her up from another crackhouse?”

In less than a heartbeat, I charged, adrenaline coiling tightly in my chest. I lunged at her, and the shock in the crowd reverberated around me like an electric shock. I swept her legs from under her, and in a heartbeat, she was on the ground with a hard thud. “Fuck you!” I came down on her, my fists raining with a furious energy I didn’t know I possessed.

Somewhere in the back of my mind, I heard gasps and murmurs ripple through the crowd, but they were drowned out by the pounding of my heart. Each punch was cathartic, breaking through years of pent-up anger, old wounds that had never fully healed.

But just as quickly as it had started, it ended. Noah’s arms were around me, pulling me away with a force that startled me back to reality. “Roxy! Stop!” His grip was firm, and his chest was solid against my back. I felt my fists clench and unclench, ready for more, but I made no more attempts. Breathing heavily, I turned to face him.

His large hands cupped my heated cheeks. “Are you okay?” His voice was low, concerned, but there was something else simmering beneath the surface—as if the situation sparked a fierce intensity within him.

Breathless, I nodded, though I could feel the remnants of adrenaline coursing through my veins. As the crowd began to murmur and disperse, Noah led me away from the fire, his arm around my waist, gently guiding me toward the makeshift parking lot in the gigantic field we were in. His grip was warm, sending sparks of something undeniable running through me.

Once we reached nicholas’s suv, he opened the door and sat me down in the passenger seat, standing between my thighs like an ever-looming wall of safety. “Where the hell did that come from?” he asked, his brows knitted together in concern, mixing with a hint of admiration that almost made my heart skip.

“I don’t know, Noah. I just…I can’t stand her. She used to do that shit to me in high school. She brought up my mom an—”

“Hey,” he interrupted softly, his expression shifting. “You shouldn’t let her get to you, she’s a fucking basic bitch that peaked in high school.”

I looked up at him, feeling the warmth of the evening wrap around us. “But she…I just wanted her to know I’m not the same girl she used to pick on anymore.” My breath hitched, the truth of it spilling out, sparking all sorts of feelings I hadn’t yet embraced.

“That much is clear, and I’m proud of you. I won’t lie, That was pretty bad ass.” he said, a slight smile breaking through. “And if I were her, I’d think twice before messing with you again.”

Noah’s words wrapped around me like an embrace, and for a moment, I felt invincible. “She wants you, and it makes me sick. She can’t take you away from me Noah..” I whispered, looking down as the weight of my emotions pressed on my chest.

He stepped even closer, the warmth of his body surrounded me, while his eyes searched mine. “You won’t lose me. You’re my best friend, Roxy. Always.”

“I’m sorry..” I sighed heavily dropping my head in embarrassment. He shook his head, his hand reaching out to stroke my cheek. "Don't apologize.” His touch sent a shiver down my spine, a sensation I had often felt around him but never wanted to acknowledge. I turned my face towards his hand, pressing a soft kiss on his palm.

"Thank you for always being there for me," I murmured, my eyes finally meeting with his.

In that moment, something shifted between us. The air crackled with unspoken feelings. He leaned in, his lips brushing mine softly, sending a jolt of electricity through your body. The kiss was soft and sweet, ending way too soon for my liking.

"I've wanted to do that for so long" he smiled, his smooth voice making me crazy. "I've always felt this way, but I didn't want to ruin our friendship." He eyed me almost nervously. Like he was waiting for my rejection.

I lifted my hand, lightly running it up his abdomen feeling every muscle beneath his shirt. I reached his neck, finally cupping his soft cheek in my hand. “Ive always wanted you Noah.” I whisper lightly, a small smile tracing my lips.

He smiled, a mix of relief and anticipation lighting up his handsome face. “You have me.” He whispered, running his big hands up my thighs.

Without waiting for a response, he leaned in again, this time not holding back. His lips were firm and demanding, yet tender, exploring every inch of my mouth as if memorizing the taste of me. I moaned softly, opening my mouth wider, inviting him in. His tongue slid against mine, a sensual battle for dominance that left mine breathless.

My hands roamed over his body, desperate to feel every inch of him. I tugged at his shirt, and he quickly obliged, shrugging it off, revealing his tatted up chest and abs. I couldn't resist running my hands over his skin, feeling the heat radiating from his body.

"Wait, not out here" Noah panted, breaking the kiss. "Scoot back"

I needed no further encouragement. I scrambled farther into the back seat, my heart pounding with anticipation. He followed, his eyes dark with lust, slamming the door closed behind him. He wasted no time, capturing my lips again as he pulled me onto his lap, my legs straddling his hips.

My fingers fumbled with his belt, eager to release the growing bulge in his jeans. He groaned as I freed his straining cock, stroking it gently, relishing the feel of his hardness in my hand.

"Fuck, baby," he breathed, his head falling back. "You have no idea how bad I’ve wanted this"

I smiled, trailing light kisses over his jaw. "Show me, then.”

With that, he grabbed the hem of my jeans. He slid them down and off, before finally guiding his cock to my already soaking pussy, slowly lowering me onto him, taking him inch by inch. I gasped as he filled me, stretching me deliciously. His hands gripped my hips, guiding my movements as I began to ride him, my wetness clinging to his shaft.

"You feel so fucking good," he grunted, his eyes rolling back in pleasure. "Your pussy so fucking tight. So perfect." He groaned, pulling my shirt off throwing somewhere in the car.

His words only served to heighten my arousal. I leaned forward, my breasts brushing against his chest as I quickened my pace. His hands roamed over my body, squeezing my breasts. A breathy moan escaped as he pinched my nipple, taking the other into his warm mouth sucking softly sending waves of pleasure through me.

"Fuck I'm so close," I whimpered, my voice breathless. "I'm gonna cum, Noah please."

He bucked his hips, driving himself deeper into me, at a fast pace. His lips released my nipple with a soft pop, as he groaned against my hot skin "Cum for me, baby. Let me feel it."

As if on cue, my orgasm crashed over me, ripples of pleasure radiating from my core. I cried out, my body trembling as he continued fucking me through it. Soon after he followed suit, his cock throbbing inside me as he came, filling me up.

Breathless and satisfied, I collapsed onto his chest, our hearts pounding in unison. He kissed the top of my head, his arms wrapped tightly around me. “Are you okay?” He whispered as his long fingers ran through my hair.

I lifted my head, cupping his cheeks with shaky hands. I kissed his lips softly, a huge smile falling over my lips. “I’m perfect.” He smiled, pecking my lips one last time before reaching for our clothes. We got dressed, and he turned toward me with his perfect smile. “You ready to go back out there?”

I sat quietly for a minute before giving him an answer. “Actually…can we go back home?” He smiled, nodding his head before leaving to round up the rest of the guys. My heart happy that the man I wanted, wanted me back.

[redrose10]

Here is the smut side story that goes with this short story from the picture game.

It’s been a looonnngggg time since I’ve written smut and I’m sure it shows. I hope it’s not too bad though.

Warnings: Unprotected sex, body insecurities, general sex stuff nothing too crazy, crying after sex, everything is consensual

Dinner had been simple and light, not wanting to weigh yourself down. The conversation was fun with lots of smiles and laughter. It felt like old times which you and Yoongi were slowly getting back to. You were moving back into your once shared home bit by bit. Mae was taking all the changes surprisingly well but you really think it helps that she gets to see her daddy almost every day again so she didn’t really care about much else.

You’d gone to a couple therapy sessions with Yoongi and it was very beneficial to you both. You wished you’d gone sooner. His therapist loved the idea of slowly trying to introduce intimacy back into your lives. Which is what you did.

It started with Yoongi using his mouth and fingers to pleasure you on a couple occasions. You always felt terrible that he would never let you return the favor but he assured you he was okay doing without and you understood why so you never pushed him more than just offering.

But a couple weeks ago his doctor switched up his medicine to something new which was supposed to have fewer or lighter side effects. You didn’t want to rush him so you waited until he was ready and last night he asked if your parents would mind taking Mae for a night. He also asked you to bring over that one lingerie set. You played it cool but internally you were screaming with excitement.

And now here you were staring at yourself in the bathroom mirror. Instead of wearing the old piece you decided to start fresh and buy something new. You chuckled, not because of the way you looked or anything since Yoongi had been working double time to make sure you got your confidence back, but because you couldn’t believe the amount of money you paid for something with such little fabric.

It was weird feeling so nervous to have sex with your husband who you also had a child with so this wasnt anything new. You two used to rip each others clothes off and get right to it but now it felt so foreign and different.

You tied your robe shut and turned off the bathroom light.

Yoongi was sitting on the edge of the bed staring off into space. You knew he was already in his head, probably criticizing himself for things that didn’t even happen yet.

When he heard the door click shut he looked over and smiled.

He grabbed your hand and pulled you in-front of him to stand between his legs, “Come here baby.” You did as he said, starting to run your fingers through his hair to comfort him.

“I’m so nervous.”, he chuckled as he toyed with the string of your robe.

“It’s okay. I am too. But remember that it’s just me Yoongi and we’re gonna take it slow and we’ll work through it together.”

He leaned into your touch loving the way your hands felt on him.

His fingers had a slight shake to them as he pulled a little harder on the string.

“C-Can I?”, he asked.

You nodded, “Please.”

In one movement he pulled on the string releasing the hold it had on your robe. You shimmied your shoulders allowing the silk to slide down to the floor revealing the light blue lace and sheer fabric that adorned your body underneath it.

You felt self conscious and started to worry but any doubts you had were banished when Yoongi’s hands grabbed onto your hips giving them a light squeeze. He licked his lips as he looked you over once again. “Y/N you’re gorgeous and mine, all mine, all for me.”, you heard him mumbling as he placed sloppy kisses over the fabric, surprising you when his teeth lightly grazed your right nipple.

Slowly he helped you out of what you were wearing, his eyes not leaving you once.

“Umm something seems off about this situation right now.”, you giggled while pulling on the sleeve of his t-shirt since he was still fully clothed.

He helped you pull off the fabric tossing it aside before he lifted up so you could pull off the sweats he had been wearing leaving him in just his boxers.

Feverishly you leaned back in searching for his lips. Yoongi pulled you on top of him as he laid back on the bed. You straddled him trying to remember every touch and every spot that would get him going. Things started falling into place.

Your lips started on his neck sucking little bits before slowly trailing down his chest to his stomach and then just below his belly button.

You ran your tongue against the fabric of his boxers feeling him half hard but it got a reaction from him so you did it again this time with a little more pressure.

He moaned your name giving you confidence. You hooked a finger around the waistband of his shorts pulling them down and freeing his large cock that you hadn’t seen in ages. You had forgotten just how beautiful your husband was, every inch of him.

He wasn’t quite there yet but you were determined to bring him to full erection. You placed kisses on his thighs knowing that he liked to be teased. Your kisses turned into little licks that got closer and closer until you surprised him by taking him fully in your mouth. He groaned as his hips bucked up to meet your mouth. Slowly but steadily you bobbed your head up and down on his cock making sure to pay extra attention to the head just like he always liked.

You made sure to even reach up and give his balls a light squeeze knowing that usually increased his pleasure. After several minutes of this he was no harder than when you started.

Trying your best to mask your disappointment you leaned back to catch your breath while still stroking him with your hand.

You tried to go back in with your mouth but he stopped you, “Just forget it Y/N. It’s not going to happen.”

“Yoongs it’s okay. Don’t get upset. Let’s just take a break and we can try again. We have all night.”, you said trying to salvage the situation.

But he pulled on his shorts and walked out of the room leaving you there naked and alone.

Giving him a few minutes you slowly slid on his shirt that he had been wearing and walked out to find him. He was sat on the couch staring at the blank television.

When you got closer he finally looked up at you, “I’m sorry Y/N, I’m sorry I can’t be there for you in the ways you need me to be.”

You sighed feeling frustrated. Frustrated with yourself, frustrated with him for feeling like that, frustrated at the situation.

Gently you leaned him back against the couch and you straddled his lap. You were going to take charge and try things your way.

“Yoongi you’re thinking too much about it. You need to just relax and let your body feel.”, you mumbled into his lips while simultaneously grinding down on his soft cock. You could feel your arousal soaking through his shorts, “And even if we don’t get there tonight I’m perfectly happy just being close to you like this.”

Your words seemed to calm him and his body started to relax back into the couch.

With more force you pushed your wet cunt down on him harder this time while using the friction to get yourself off.

Yoongi’s hands were roaming your body until they settled on your hips helping to hold you down. He always had a thing for letting you use him as you pleased.

“Mmm baby, I don’t even need you inside me. I can cum just like this.”, you moaned in his ear.

He took the hem of the shirt you were wearing and pulled it over you throwing it across the room with force. You laughed until his mouth connected harshly with your left nipple while his large hands squeezed your breast together making a moan escape you.

His hips bucked up encouraging you to continue chasing your high when you felt his bulge growing. He was the hardest he’d been all night. Not wanting to draw attention to it you continued to grind down on him just like you had been. His shorts now soaked with a mix of your arousal and his pre cum.

“Do you trust me?”, you whispered in his ear before nibbling on the lobe.

“Mmhm with my life.”

You continued your movements until he was a mess under you and rock hard.

You lifted your hips up far enough that you could quickly move his shorts down freeing his red swollen cock allowing it to stand straight up. Before he could react you sunk down on him talking all of him in one shot.

The pain was immediately replaced by pleasure as you willingly accepted the familiar girth.

“Oh fuck”, he hissed feeling your warmth and wetness for the first time in over a year.

You gave it another moment for you both to adjust before you began to bounce up and down on his length.

Yoongi was a moaning cursing mess. His head rolling back with his mouth agape. His eyes squeezed shut as he soaked in the sensations and sounds around him. You took the moment to plant kisses along his jaw when he lunged forwarded capturing your lips with his instead.

You were trying your hardest to make sure he enjoyed this moment to the fullest. Using his shoulders for leverage you started bouncing up and down more aggressively letting his cock fully slip out of you before sheathing yourself again. The position giving Yoongi the one of the best views he’s ever seen between your body sliding up and down on his painfully hard erection and your boobs bouncing inches from his face. That combined with the sounds you were making were blissful and he found himself nearly finishing by surprise.

He gasped grabbing a hold of his cock to prevent you from slamming back down on it.

“Fuck sorry Y/N, I nearly came.”, he said out of breath.

You giggled giving him a few kisses before he removed his hand allowing you slip his cock back inside. Once again you began your movements but this time his hands clung to your waist, “Y/N go slow, please. I-I can’t last much longer. It’ll be even less if you keep this up.”, he panted.

“It’s okay Yoongs. Let go whenever you’re ready. I’ve got you.”, you said giving his shoulder a squeeze.

You obliged for a little though. Wanting to keep the feeling of him finally being inside you. You moved slowly, both of you watching as he slid in an out of you.

You started to pick up the pace again though. Your own high was close and you knew he was even closer. You could feel the way he twitched inside, his grip on your waist getting tighter, the concentration on this face as he tried to fight it. Skin on skin and ragged breathing the only sounds in the room.

“Y/N. I…I can’t. You have to stop. I’m gonna cum if you don’t stop.”, he cried into your chest.

“Then cum for me. I want to make you feel good. Fill me up baby. I know you want to.”

And that was the final push he needed.

He came inside you with a loud pornographic moan, his body shaking as you continued to ride him through his high wanting him to feel euphoric.

Somehow he still managed to bring his hand to your clit rubbing figure eights and willing himself through the over stimulation as you continued to ride him through your own high as well.

He leaned his forehead against your chest and you placed a kiss on the top of his head.

“Was that okay?.” you asked.

“Y/N, that was more than okay.”, he chuckled.

Both of you stayed like that for a minute because you were exhausted but also just genuinely enjoyed the intimacy that had been missing for so long.

“Thank you…thank you for not giving up on me.”, he sniffled and you realized he was crying.

“Don’t thank me. We’re in this together. No matter what. Everything will be okay.”, you said wiping away his tears with your thumbs.

He kissed you, “I love you Y/N, I love you so much.”

You kissed him again and again making sure he knew you loved him too.

[sunnyvelvet]

Time Together (Teen Titan!Dick Grayson!Robin x Reader)

A/N: Hello! He is an imagine from a time before that I am really proud of. Enjoy!

WC: 1,529

Original Link

It wasn't always easy, with him at the tower almost 24/7 and me working a full-time job. We still made it work. A lot of nights would end with him coming through my window and complaining that I shouldn't keep it open. I only kept it open for him, and he knew that. His time at my apartment was always content, gave him a reason to be out of that Goddamn suit. We would watch a movie or infomercials. Cuddled up together without a care, soft kisses and hand-holding being fairly common in these times. It was always something we looked forward too.

(Y/N)'s POV I had only been to the tower a handful of times. Mostly when everyone else on the team was out. He liked to keep me his secret, even though he had plenty of secrets from them. I understood though, not being in the "business" and all. He wants to keep me safe. It honestly surprised me when he texted me to come to the tower.

It was late as I crept to were Dick had said to meet him. It was probably 2 AM, thankfully I don't have work tomorrow. I was standing on a beach that was connected to the water that surrounded the tower. Getting fed up with waiting, I decided to start walking back to my car. I had parked it about four blocks away. As I started to walk back to it I heard my name. "(Y/n)! Wait!" It was Dick. "And I thought you weren't going to show up." I said with a smile on my face. I honestly was really happy to see him, even in full gear.

"I'm sorry I kept you waiting. I got caught up in something." He smiled at me then engulfed me into a hug. I had to pull myself away from him. "So, what did you want to meet about out here?" I asked, very confused about why we were meeting here. "Well, I kinda have a surprise for you in the tower." He proceeded to scratch the back of his neck, "As long as we're quite we shouldn't wake anyone." I looked at him unsurely. Yes, I had been in the tower before but not when the team was there.

"I'm not sure Dick, should we really take that chance?" I stepped away from him as I said that. I really wasn't prepared to meet his team if someone does wake up. Especially at 2 AM! "It'll be fine (Y/N), we just got to sneak around till we get to your surprise." I agreed as we started to walk to the small motorboat he had taken from the tower to the small beach. Thankfully the engine wasn't too loud and we got to the tower without notifying anyone, I hope.

Once we were in the tower we took an elevator to a floor, I hadn't seen the number Dick pushed because he had me held in his arms so tight I could barely move. Once we got out of the elevator we walked slowly towards the end of the hall. He was, basically, dragging me down it. We got to a bathroom. "Umm, Babe..." I said trying to refrain from using his real name, "Why are we at a bathroom?" I laughed for a good minute before he just opened the door and walked in.

In the bathroom were candles lit and a bubble bath run for both of use. Flower petals were scattered on the floor and in the water. "Oh, wow!" That's all I could say as I stared at it in awe. "Do you like it? I thought it would be nice." He had a little bit of doubt in his voice. Like I wouldn't like it. "I love it." I moved over to him and gave him a kiss. Just a peck but enough to make his doubt go away. I started to stripe my clothes. Shoes, socks, shirt, and pants. I noticed Dick hadn't taken anything off yet.

"Are you going to join me or not?" I asked then proceeded to take my bra and panties off. I glanced at him as I walked towards the tub. He quickly took off his suit, wasting no time. He stepped into the tub and sat in front of me. "I thought we could relax together and your apartment doesn't have a tub," He started to talk about something else but all I could focus on was his face. He still had his mask on but I could tell he was excited to just be with me tonight.

I moved over so that I was sitting in between his legs. His arms going straight to my waist to hold me. We sat there for nothing but a few minutes, even though it felt like hours. Nothing was better than being in Dick's arms. He moved and grabbed a cup that was sitting next to the tub. "What are you doing?" I smiled while I looked at him, so confused. "I'm going to wash your hair. You know, like before." Oh, how you did know. When you still lived in Gotham with your Father/Mother, they would always leave for days on end for business. Dick would come over and stay with you.

We would always end up taking a bath. Mostly because we were both stressed and just need to be near each other. With him out fighting crime and me trying to get both of use though high school. I did most of his homework, I swear. I was always nice just be together, even just for a little bit. We would wash each other hair and talk about nothing. It was some of my favorite memories with him.

Dick started to pour some water onto my head, covering my eyes with his other hand. He did it multiple times before my whole head was wet. Continuing, he opened an unlabeled bottle and poured its contents onto his hand. As Dick scrubbed my scalp I leaned back into him. Relaxing a bit, noting that it smelled like strawberries. "Does it feel good?" All I could do was hum at him. To content to talk. Dick continued to wash my hair until he felt it was clean enough. Fishing the cup out of the water, he covers my eyes. "I don't want to get soap in them." He started to rinse my hair until all the suds were out of it. He pushed some of my hair away and kissed my cheek. I turned my head so I could kiss him. It turned a little heated but ended so I could tell him to turn around.

Now sitting facing him I took the cup from him. Quickly filling it up and pouring over his head. I smiled at him as I continued. "So, how are things around here?" It wasn't a question I asked often but I still liked to know sometimes. I poured some of the same strawberry shampoo he used on me into my hands. "It's the same I guess. Not a lot goes on." I knew that was bull but I didn't push the issue. I didn't really want to know what he would say if I do. I scrubbed his head as we sat in silence. It wasn't an uncomfortable silence, it just silence we had gotten used to when being alone together.

Rising his hair, I realized that I had wrapped my legs around his waist. My ankles were even linked. When his hair was finally free of soap suds he leaned towards me and wrapped his arms around me. I did the same. We ended up staying in that position and just talked about little things.

It ended up being two hours later before we knew it. Time can really go by when you're with someone you love. We washed each other's bodies by then. I had my back to his chest laying in his embrace when we started to look at the time. "It's 4 AM, we should probably get out." He looked at me sadly, not wanting to leave yet. "I don't wanna." I stated, looking at him with puppy dog eyes. "I mean you could always stay for breakfast with me... And the team." The team...

"Fine." That's all I said before I stood up in the tub, grabbing a towel. I dried off and started to re-dress when Dick got out of the tub. I waited for him to get ready before leaving the bathroom, not wanting to get caught. "Let's get you back to your car."

We were both quite to the motorboat. We were honestly quite the whole way to my car. Dick had insisted to walk me to it. Now we were at it and I didn't know what to say. Great night, see you next week?! That wasn't really what I was looking for. "I love you (Y/N)." Dick said it so fast and so abruptly I almost did release he said anything. "I love you too Dick." I leaned in to kiss him and then I got into my car. Waving as I drove off.

[morose-melodies]

the nameless stowaway | yandere! capitano x reader

summary: while on a ship trying to get to natlan, the captain found a way to pass time; watching you, a stowaway.

content warning: the captain killed someone and that's about it!! (tell me if I missed anything)

for two days and three long nights had the captain been on this ship as it aimlessly navigated the sea.

it started on the second day when the ship went slightly off course. the captain of the ship could not figure out how to get back on course and now, the captain was forced to remain on the ship and slowly get sick of it and everyone on the ship.

besides him, eight other people occupied the ship, not including the captain of the ship... oh, and you were also there.

you were a sneaky stowaway and he only ever caught glances of you at night - watching as you snagged snacks from people's bags and ran back to wherever you had come from.

he didn't mind, nor did he care enough to stop you, that was, as long as you didn't try it on him.

but, tonight was a bit different - instead of stealing from people's bags, you snuck into the galley and shut the door behind yourself. the captain chuckled, you would have a feast tonight.

most of the passengers had felt too sick to eat that morning, so most of the food had been left untouched.

you had eaten all that you could, hoping it would keep you full enough for the next two days before creeping out of the galley. you knew that the captain knew, and considering all you had heard about him, you were afraid that one day he could come and behead you for stealing people's food.

but he hadn't, not yet at least.

you went back to your hiding place, behind a large pile of luggage, and snuggled up in your thin, sort of damp blanket and rested - soon enough, you'd be in natlan.

...

when a storm came, and the waves got violet and rocked the ship - you could not rest behind the luggage, let alone outside. you got up from where you rested, blanket over your shoulder as the cold rain pelted down on your skin.

no one was out; all of them rested in the berth, and you could not enter it since you had snuck onto the ship.

at this point, you were shivering, tumbling, and drenched in rain - seeing no point in your blanket anymore, you tossed it away, as you did, you saw the captain, standing at the door of the berth... exiting it?

you stilled, this was the perfect time for him to kill you, right? he would toss you overboard and no one would notice or even know that he had killed you, maybe, or maybe he would draw his sword and chop you up into little piec-

"I'm sure you must be regretting your decision to sneak onto this ship now, right?" it was an idle conversation or perhaps a threat, was he threatening to tell everyone?

"oh? sorta... but, it'll be fine once we get to natlan."

"I doubt we'll make it to natlan. it seems more likely that we end up back in snezhaya," the captain sighed afterward - he would have to report to the tsaritsa and blame the captain of the ship which seemed all so childish.

"huh? I thought this ship was headed to natlan..."

oh, you looked so very disappointed. the captain shook his head, "that's no longer the case. the captain has no idea where he's headed."

"aren't you the captain?"

"the captain of the ship," he clarified, shrugging his coat from his shoulders and approaching you, placing it over your trembling shoulders, "I'm afraid i cannot make room for you in the berth - you'll have to make do with my coat."

...

and, of course, you made due.

you survived the storm - you might have come down with something but you survived. as you lay in your hiding spot, the large coat over your shoulders, you waited for the passengers to finish their breakfast so you could have the leftovers.

it was a while before you heard the passengers quiet down, and you figured they had split up, leaving the galley, so you got up, leaving the coat behind, and snuck into the galley.

they had hardly left anything behind today.

"hm..." still, you ate whatever was left behind. though it wasn't filling, it was something and you were grateful.

after finishing, you turned to leave but there stood the captain - wait, how long has he been standing there? "have you been watching me?"

"nonsense," he replied with a firm shake of his head, before stepping past you, "I see you haven't changed in your ways?" was he teasing? of course you haven't changed! you were starving and-

the captain set a plate of untouched biscuits and other foods on the counter, "woah... where'd you get those from?" you inched towards the plate, grabbed the biscuit, and ate it.

"it's all leftovers."

"those guys are hogs," you mumbled as you stuffed your face with another biscuit.

and the captain bit back a smile.

...

it was times like these where you doubted if you'd survive - for the last five days, all you could smell was saltwater and humid air, and now, you could smell nothing.

you hadn't bothered to get up for a while now - instead, you remained curled up in the captain's coat, pitying yourself.

perhaps this wasn't worth it...

"stowaway, where are you?"

it was the captain. he had been looking for you for a while now - he was under the assumption that you had fallen overboard but he couldn't be sure since he did not know where you went to hide every day after snagging food.

you didn't want to reply, but found yourself doing so anyway, "'m here."

the captain paused and turned to face the pile of luggage. "have you been hiding here the entire time?"

"yeah..."

you didn't sound well, not at all. the captain pushed the luggage aside and though you groaned and protested, he tugged you out of your hiding spot, his coat still wrapped around you.

"you took no precaution before getting onto the ship, did you?" the captain looked at you - sickly and pale, and sighed. "stay here, don't move an inch," he instructed you before standing and walking off.

first, he ruins your hiding spot, and then he walks off? it was a shame you were too tired to fuss about it.

when the captain came back, he had a warm drink in hand. he crouched down to your level, took your hand, and placed the drink into your hand, "I doubt it'll cure you, but, you're deathly cold, it will surely warm you but I'm afraid this is all i can do to help."

"thank you," you mumbled before sipping at the drink.

while you sipped at your drink, the captain fixed your hiding spot that he had ruined and felt the urge to give you another one of his coats to keep you comfortable, but he resisted.

...

each day, the captain would bring you a warm drink to help your cold clear up, and though he doubted it would work, you were already feeling much better.

you had crawled out of your hiding spot for the first time in a while, the captain's coat over your shoulders and you snuck to the galley.

just as you opened the door, you knew you had messed up - there was a man inside, and he had seen you.

you weakly smiled at the man, as you took a step back while he took steps towards you, "are you the rat that's been stealing all the leftovers?"

"i... um, maybe?"

"and are you the rat that's been stealing from people's luggage?"

"yes, but i'm sorry! i won't do it again, i promise-"

everything you had said was enough to piss the man off and the sight of you wearing the captain's coat only made him angrier.

the man grabbed your upper arm and tugged you along with him, even as you whined and tried to explain yourself, he did not listen.

"look, I'm sorry i won't do it again-"

"i don't wanna hear it from you-"

"I'll take the stowaway from here," it was the captain, once again swooping in and saving you, "good looking out. I'll make sure they cause you no more trouble."

the captain grabbed your arm and tugged you from the man's grip, pulling you along as he walked off, out of the man's sight. "you need to stay put," the captain commented as he brought you back to your hiding spot, "go on. I'll bring you something to eat - I'll do that for you every day, will that keep you out of trouble?"

"you don't have to-"

"I will. now, stay out of trouble."

...

"what'd you do with that stowaway?"

"i did away with them."

"really now?"

"of course. i would not lie."

"good, if you hadn't stopped me that day, i would have done it mysel-"

the man could do nothing but scream as he fell overboard and into the cold water.

soon enough he would die.

this was the preferable way, there was no need for the captain to bloody his sword over something so trivial.

...

"don't you feel hot wearing all of that armor?"

"not particularly."

"what about the mask, isn't that hot?"

"no."

"is that your hair?"

reaching forward, you tangled your fingers in his long black hair, "it is," the captain gently nudged your hand away, "there's no need to touch, though."

as sweet as you were, he had seen you sneeze into your hand moments earlier.

"my bad," you apologized, setting your hand to your side, "do i have to give you your coat back ever?"

"we've been over this, no? i have many other coats, so, keep that one," the captain replied, looking at you and the way your lip twitched at his reply.

"look at that cloud," you pointed above the two of you, and the captain looked up, "it's heart-shaped."

"I see that," he nodded before glancing at you; the way you smiled at a silly cloud was - hm, the captain found himself smiling while looking at you.

odd.

"wait-" you stood up, quickly running towards the railing and pointed ahead, "do you see that?? isn't that land??"

the captain also stood and looked to where you were pointing, and indeed, it was land. "you have a keen eye," the captain looked at you, at the way you grinned, at the way you held yourself, and dare he say he would miss you.

"ohmigosh!!" you cheered, leaning further over the railing to see where you were going... you saw snow and your shoulders dropped, "no way..."

the captain chuckled, looking at you once more, "this was all such an inconvenience," but, in a way, it felt worth it; after all, he was able to meet you.

"you were pretty cool, thanks for the coat... and um, thank you for not throwing me overboard or something," you looked up at the captain to see he was already looking at you.

"I wouldn't dream of harming you," the captain assured you and though you couldn't see it, he had hearts in his eyes as he looked at you.

he did not want this ship to reach snezhnaya - he preferred things stay the way they were but he knew that couldn't happen.

the captain was patient; he could wait. a person like you wouldn't give up on their dreams so easily.

[mariacallous]

Courageous people risking their lives for freedom and democracy in Belarus and Ukraine need allies in the West if they are to prevail over tyranny, Tsikhanouskaya said in a speech in Washington.

“Tyranny is contagious. If not contained, it spills over,” she said. “We must reject the very thought that tyrants can be appeased or can be re-educated. Dictators will not stop until we stop them.”

Fresh from meetings at the United Nations General Assembly in New York, Tsikhanouskaya said she had heard a lot of talk about the “fatigue” of war, of Russian President Vladimir Putin and of Lukashenka. Complaining about “fatigue” is a luxury unavailable to those on the frontlines, she said.

The tiredness of the conflict in the West is nothing compared to the experience of Ukrainian soldiers in cold trenches, parents whose children have been killed by Russian missiles, Belarusian political prisoners dying in jail, or a 77-year-old woman in Belarus who takes to the streets every day to protest Lukashenka’s regime, she said.

“I heard it so often that, at the end, I felt fatigue of fatigue,” she said. “This fatigue comes from the fact that we don’t know when it will end, when Ukraine wins, when the Lukashenka regime collapses. But sometimes, we can’t know when, and all we should do is bring this moment closer. We must do it because it is right.”

What unites true and dedicated campaigners for freedom is “immunity to fatigue” and “intolerance to dictatorship and injustice,” Tsikhanouskaya, who leads the Belarusian government in exile, told a September 26 awards dinner hosted by the Center for European Policy Analysis (CEPA.)

“When you fight against tyranny, you have no rights for time outs or personal comfort. The struggle requires sacrifice, consistency, and bravery because any doubts, any hesitations, are seen by dictators as weakness,” she said. “We must continue to exert pressure on dictators, on Lukashenka and Putin, for each crime, for each broken fate, they must pay the price.”

Tsikhanouskaya’s husband, Sergei, was jailed for announcing his intention to stand against Lukashenko in 2020 and was one of 1,323 political prisoners currently being held in Belarus, according to Viasna, a human rights organization.

Those under fire and in jail as they fight for democracy and freedom in Belarus, Ukraine, and around the world need allies more than ever, she said, and appealed directly to the US for support.

“No war, no fight, can be won without allies,” she said. “It needs allies like the United States of America, you are a beacon of hope for many nations. Don’t stop standing for what is right.”

Tsikhanouskaya emphasized that the outcome of the struggle will have ramifications around the world.

“Supporting Ukraine and supporting Belarus is not charity, it’s an investment into peace and security globally,” she said. “The path for freedom might be very long and difficult, but it’s the only path worth walking, so let’s walk this path together.

[misguidedasgardian]

Wildcats (XXXII)

XXXII. Prosper season

MASTERLIST

Summary: Tomorrow never comes until it's too late.. 

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Zombie apocalypse AU, living dead, zombies, guts, blood, guns, injures, hostile takeover, threats, Lucille, someone brains getting bashed in, DEATH OF A SECONDARY CHARACTER, BLOOD, GORE, MOCKING, everything Negan related, kidnapping, LOVES I’M SERIOUS, PROCEED WITH CAUTION

+18, MINORS DNI

Notes: Another song for a title jejejeje ANYWAYS… I pondered over this over and over about how to go about it… I hope I did it justice. 

The three of you looked at the scene, standing still, not daring to move

“What do we do?”, you asked them, “what the hell do we do!?”, you started to feel your own heart beating inside your chest, fear making an appearance.

“We get the hell out of here”, said Alexander, “now”

“We can’t leave!”, Rosita fought back, “We can’t leave our home! Carl! and the others!”

“They are gonna be fine, but we, are the capable ones, we are the experienced fighters, the threats”, he said quickly, ”we are the ones that get killed”

“He makes a good point”, you whispered.

“YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO, THAT HOUSE, THAT HOUSE AND THAT OTHER HOUSE! MOVE IT PEOPLE”, Negan, on the street, pointed at yours, Rosita’s and the other house that belonged to your group.

“They’re coming for us”, you whispered, you didn’t even have to ask if they were carrying, they took out their guns from their holsters, ready for anything.

“We stand our ground here”, said Alexander

“They already have hostages”, you whispered, “is not very…”, you interrupted yourself when you saw Arat herself, with that shit eating grin leading a group of goons into your house, “OH FUCK NO!”, you said, ready to get out and intercept her.

“No! wait!”, Rosita grabbed you before you could leave, you looked back at her with a plead in your eyes

“That’s the woman who tortured me”, you said seriously, Rosita and Alex exchanged looks

“Let’s fuck her up”, she said then. You just smirked at her.

But the door slamming open downstairs make all of your heads perk up

“We kill them first”, Rosita said, so you all three nodded, in agreements, and put the safety off of your weapons

Alexander blew the head of the first savior that appeared up the stairs. 

Rosita the second

“UH! LOOKS LIKE THE PARTY IS GETTING STARTED!”, Negan shouted, the gunshots resounded all over the house

It was like being in a movie, you had a grave voice as a commentator as you tried to prevent the saviors from coming into your house, you felt like that time at Terminus, it was you or them and right now, you couldn’t afford to be the one to doubt right now, if someone was going to come across you you were likely to kill them, and that was it. They were inside your home, your house, so no, it was non negotiable.

You managed to eliminate those who had entered through the front door, but more were coming, sot he three of you decided to sneak out the back door, and you moved right next door to your house, it was going to be a cold day in hell before you let that woman even touch something that belonged to you or your family. 

With the help of Alex you climbed right onto the small roof over the first floor leading to the windows of the second floor, and you climbed through there

Oh you could already hear her. She was giving commands as she register the first floor. You didn’t even wait for Alex and Rosita, but you heard gunshots outside, so you guessed they were on their own fight, but you had to get to Arat, for yourself, nobody could do that to you and come out winning, no way in hell.

You were in the last step of the stairs, and then you saw her, with her smug face signaling his goons to follow her, then she raised her face and saw you, oh you saw it, even if it lasted a second, you saw the fear. 

”What the fuck did I say?”, you asked, “that I was going to put my fucking axe through your thick skull”, you will come to be scared of this side of you, the one that not only was alright with killing people, but was enjoying to defeat your enemies, “and here you are, trying to get into my fucking house!?”, you threw your ax at her, as she was trying to get to her feet, she stumbled back the last steps and tried to get away from you as the ax got stuck in the wall where her head had been.

You ran down, grabbed your ax that was stuck to the wall and turned to face her. She had a knife in her hand, but that was not going to help her much. She came at you with it, but you blocked her easily, it was like you had been taken by a foreign entity, you didn’t even recognize yourself as you returned every swing.

The door was open and that’s why she flies back and trough it when you kicked her in her stomach 

“Get the hell out of my house!”, you screamed. You grabbed your ax with both hands as you were above her and swung it from above your head down, but as you were ready to end her, you heard like 5 automatics being unlocked. And five saviors were pointing them at you.

Arat stood to her feet, wiping the blood of her mouth

“You think this has a happy ending for you”, she asked you, grabbing your face as another man grabbed your weapons, “it doesn’t, you are not the heroes here”, she said with a mocking grin. 

”Although it's been fun to watch, end this now, or I’ll be forced to start killing your people now”, you heard

They grabbed you, making sure they took away your gun, for like the third time is that you lost one of your guns, and of course they took your ax, throwing it in the grass right there, at least they didn’t took it for themselves, and pulled you towards the round up, making sure to rough you up as much as they could, grabbing you tightly and pushing you around. 

You huffed when they pushed you to your knees, you didn’t want to fight it unnecessarily, but, you couldn’t help but to feel that usual glint of humiliation, to be treated like this, to be this helpless.

Once you were on the ground, Rosita by your side… there was an awful silence, like the calm before the storm. You felt his gaze on you, but you were so shocked, coming to terms with what was happening, that you didn’t even manage to look at him, your eyes were trailed on the street in front of you.

He whistled then, a sound that chilled you to the very bone, you didn’t even know why, he walked slowly, he was taunting you, he walked in front of you, and the around you, making his abt scratch the floor, as he passed behind you, it made your skin crawl, a tingle down your spine made you twist on the floor, making him chuckle

“Oh darling”, he teased, “are you afraid of me?”, he leaned in, until he could whisper in your ear, “you should be”

“You rapacious rat bastard”, you accused, and he just laughed, “we gave you sanctuary”

“Well, it's not like we needed it”, he said, hissing theatrically. “I already have a Sanctuary”

“If you could come in at any second, why do all of this?”, you asked him. He just looked down at you

“You won’t believe the valuable information I gathered these past weeks”, he said, now he spoke seriously, “How you work as a team, how you think… specially, how you think”, you frowned as you looked at him, “you gave me much to think darlin’, you did”, he said, “now!”, you jumped as he suddenly raised his voice, “I don’t want the others to think I play favorites, so, be a doll, and stay there looking pretty alright?”, He walked away from you, teasing, looking at the different people he had on his knees

You were nothing impressive, barely people that got a couple of weeks of training with Alex and Rosita, definitely no threats.

You looked around to find your people, Gabriel, and Tyresse, you cursed them in your mind, for you could tell they didn’t fight it, they just took it, and went willingly when armed guys entered their houses and made them kneel.

“People of Alexandria!”, he shouted, “For those who don’t know me… I’m Negan”, he said, he swung his barbed wire bat threateningly, “Deanna here did knew me better though, thought she could strike a deal with me, close and personal”, he teased with a wide smile, “but that’s not how it works”

“You told me we had more time”, she accused, and this was a bit above your paygrade, but… you really wanted to know what went down there.

You heard gunshots in the distance, coming from Olivia’s place down the street, you looked at Negan, but he was only smiling widely, a bit later, two men brought in Carl, alone, they haven't even touched him, but they treated him roughly and made him kneel right on the other side of the street in front of you. his eyes immediately found yours

“are you ok?”, you mouthed, and he barely nodded

“I will let Olivia stay in the house with Judith”, hearing the little girl’s name coming out from his mouth made your stomach turn, “for you to see how reasonable I can be”, he said with a smile. 

But that didn’t make you feel any better

“That’s all of them boss”, muttered a guy you haven't seen before, so Negan seemed to look for someone amongst you, you saw his dark eyes scanning the place, then he finally turned to the both of you

“Where’s Alexander?”, he asked, you looked around and realized, he wasn’t anywhere, they brought in Rosita, but not him

“He got away”, said Rosita with a smirk, but Negan was not amused at all. 

“Find him!”, he said, and a group of Simon's men ran to fulfill the order, you looked at Rosita and she nodded at you, you smiled back

He was going to indeed fuck them up

“This is not funny”, muttered Negan, “this shit ain’t funny at all, in fact, it's gonna cost you!”, he said, out loud.

Alex was right, he presented a threat to this, and it's a good thing he escaped, he could do so much from the outside, especially if he manages to get to the container filled with guns. 

“Before we can truly start this… we need to wait for the rest of you”, your eyes could not leave his form, he truly scared you, he was unpredictable, “they should be back shortly”, your eyes opened wide… oh the rest of them? Daryl? Rick? Michonne?

No no no no

“Yeah, you should leave before they get here”, said Carl, he was defiant as always, “they will kill you all”, he snapped

“Carl!”, you called, “stop”, Negan chuckled darkly, as did many of their men

“Really kid? threats?”, he asked

“You think you know us but you don’t”, he kept going, “you don’t really know how dangerous we are”

“Carl please!”, you said again. Alexander was right, you were the threats and so far… you had been fine, but Negan did not need to be reminded there was a clear difference between your group and the natives of Alexandria, not right now.

“Don’t be rude darling”, said Negan, “the kid and I are talkin”

Negan then looked around with a smile on his face

“Oh is that what this is? Are you waiting for the valiant heroes to come back and save you? for the badass group that your leader accepted into your home to rescue all from the big bad wolf?”, he laughed, he laughed in the faces of all the hopeful people, “oh if you think this has a happy ending, you haven’t been paying much attention!”, he was like one of those charismatic presenters of those TV contests and if you weren’t at his mercy, with a gun pointing to the back of your head, you’d be really entertained 

The sky was turning gray, the new day threatening to show up, but you still had a couple of hours left… of darkness.

Headlights interrupted you, coming from the gates, and the rumbles of a couple of engines cut through the silence that had been settled above the lot of you.

“Damn! Was that cool or what? we timed it almost perfectly!”, Negan said with a wide smile, the gates opened to let four other vehicles in, two of them were vans, then there was the RV, Alexandria’s RV, and then a big truck. They came down the street until they were in front of the first vehicles. The vans parked backwards so the back was towards you. 

Several men surrounded the vehicles, and helped them unload whatever was in the van. Soon, you realized, they were the rest of your family.

Simon led the gloomy committee, as he made his men drag your family from the vehicles. You gasped when you saw Daryl, they just threw him on the street, he was not wearing the long sleeve shirt had this morning, he had his vest but nothing more, and he was shaking, covered by a thick blanket, and down his right arm was blood, shiny, new blood, he was wounded

His eyes found your own and you wanted to cry

The others seemed well, although, you could tell, there were some people missing… Maggie, Glenn, Beth, Carol, Morgan, they were nowhere to be seen.

Oh gods, where they dead?

You tried to get to Daryl but someone grabbed you roughly -again- making you whine in pain, throwing you back into the ground. 

You then looked for the eyes of Rick, who just looked like he just came down to the same realization as you. He was looking at Negan like he was the evil incarnated, and you realized that just now he was coming to the realization you had about an hour ago.

That Smith was Negan… That you were completely screwed, and at the mercy of the enemy that you had let inside your walls. 

The rest of them, Abraham, Sasha, Aaron, Eugene, Michonne, looked… like they had been through hell, and you could read the shock in their faces like an open book

Abraham, and Michonne looked more composed, showing nothing in their stone cold faces. But… the rest of them were completely frightened

“Great!, now that everyone’s here…!”, it was like Smith was on crack, “or at least… some of you”, shit shit shit, you looked frantically at Rick, who found your eyesight and nodded softly, trying to calm you down, you now were the one losing it, and quickly. 

“We can come to an agreement…”

“Nope!”, said Negan, swinging his bat into the air, “No, Rick, you don’t speak for Alexandria, and don’t think you’d notice… but you are not in a position to negotiate anything right now”, he said, he was very theatrical, he was. “Now, where were we?”, he asked, he turned and looked at you, you looked back at him wide-eyed, “oh yeah… first impressions, paying the price of someone escaping… yes… let’s wrap that up”, he said 

This couldn’t be good

“But…!”, with his sudden change of tone he always made you jump, “before we can begin, I need you all to turn to the same page as us… you need to understand… how things are going to be from now on… we… are the saviors, and now, you are under our wings”, he said with a taunting smile, “you will scavenge for me, you will work for me, and you will provide for me… in turn… we… will save you”

“From what?”, asked Abraham. But it only took one look from Negan for you to realize what he meant… from himself and his group.

“From the dead ones, of course”, he said, frowning, but with a wide smile on his face. “For you to understand who I am… and who we are… We want to make things clear from the get go… so I’m going to beat the hell out of one of you… fine people”, he said, you heard gasps and quiet ‘no’s’, and people moving on their own very spots, but everyone was frozen to death, “it should have been three…”, he said then, “I told Deanna to give me three names, preferably of the new group, from the Rick’s Pricks….”, you looked at Deanna and she looked possibly defeated, looking at Negan with a hate in her eyes

And for the first time, you understood what Mayor meant…

When a good man goes to war, even the devil clenches his buttcheeks… or something like that 

If looks could kill, Negan would definitely be dead

“... But she wouldn’t give even one of them up!”, said Negan, “and thennnn…”, he turned back to you, “this fine lady here made a really good point”, he said, and you couldn’t believe what good point you could have made. “You will not bend… oh no… the usual package won’t work with you, will it? you are survivors, fighters, you will fight and fight and fight me… so… let’s begin”

It was deadly quiet… you shared concerned looks as you found the one of Daryl, who looked like he wanted to spring to you, you mouthed to him, “I’m alright”, and you had faith that everything was going to be alright. 

“There is one person here, that will be the pea under my mattress, the little bitch stone inside my boot, this person… and that person… needs to die, for you all to realize how serious about this I am, and how I am able to fulfill my threats, I really want you all to know me”, he said. 

Negan walked… slowly, taunting you, he walked in front of all of you.

You felt Daryl’s gaze on you so you returned the stare

Whatever was going to happen, you couldn’t wait any longer, the wait, the uncertainty, was driving you mad, you wanted to go to him, to hold him, you could tell he was having a horrible time, his eyes… his face was sickly pale, he was shaking, he had a bullet wound on his shoulder, you could tell, he had been badly injured.

Behind him, you saw the bastard with Daryl’s own crossbow, pointing it at him, waiting for any excuse to kill him. Looking at him with such contempt, just like Arat looked at you, what the hell did you do to these people for them to hate you that much?

Without knowing it you gave a piece of your mind to the leader of the organization, and because of that he was going to take it out on your family.

He whistled once more, and he stopped right as he pointed his bat at you.

“NO!”, screamed Daryl. And Negan laughed

“Speak again and I will bash her pretty little brains in”, he said severely, “Relax Daryl-boy”, he said, recuperating his smile, “I wouldn’t dare to touch the golden girl here, oh no”, he said, then looking at Rick, he made a quick turn around, so quick that it made your head spin.

“Any takers?”, he asked.

You looked around once more and everyone was just petrified, you had seen freakishly scary leaders and what they could make his followers do, but not the locals, these people, were just now coming hard to this reality.

You saw it in Atlanta in the hospital, in Terminus, with the claimers, and with the biker gang in the road, and with the wolves.

The monsters this new sick world had created

But many of these people had never seen anything like this before.

But as you looked around more closely, the circle has kind of limited into your group, and Alexandrian’s inner circle, they didn’t bother with the old ladies and gentlemen, no, you didn't even saw Jesse anywhere

He was going to take his pick from the very top group.

“So nobody thinks they deserve to be taken by Lucille?”, he asked, swinging his bat again, did he name it? that was its name? you were confused. 

You were just coming to the realization that one of you was going to die tonight, that this Negan psycho was going to beat one of you to death. 

“You don’t have to kill anybody”, said Michonne quickly, “we understand”, she said severely, “we work for you now”, Negan just looked at her, the smile never wiped from his face.

“No, you see I don’t see that you understand, this woman here, tried to cut the corner, didn’t take me seriously, and that’s why I think I should bash someone’s head in, and I really wanted it to be Alexander”, he said out loud, “but… he ran like a cowards so another one must pay…”

The rage was leaving your body, like foam after being showered, what took your body instead was something you hadn't seen in a while… fear. It felt like a cold shower, numbing your shaking extremities. Maybe it was you, maybe it was and he said that to make you think you weren’t the chosen one, he knew you had brought in Alexander and you were close to Rick and Daryl, he was going to kill you. 

He swung his abt, with time, with purpose and determination towards Tyresse, and you heard, in fractions of a second, screams and gasps, but the bat missed his head by mere inches and you knew he hadn't missed on purpose, he was trying to scare you all.

It worked

Everyone was whimpering, and Tyresse had started crying, Sasha had screamed and she was now crying.

This couldn’t be happening. As you saw around, and looked at each and everyone one of the faces of the men and women there, tough as nails, waiting to shoot you int he head, or beat you to death, or held you captive, or torture you.

You started to think about all the things that happened between your both groups, what you did in the sanctuary, how you beat a couple of them up… how they beat you up… how you just tried to kill one of them because of your rage.

Did you bring this on your group?

Perhaps you should have done a deal with them from the beginning.

Perhaps things should have been different. 

Negan took himself to the other side of the round, this time, nearing the ones who showed up later to the party. He stopped right in front of Daryl, and then he turned to look at you. He played with the bat on his hand, that’s when the tears started falling from your eyes, silently, but you were just preparing for the worst.

The second best after Alex could be Daryl, he was like a wild horse of the great Northamerican wilderness, untamable, and Negan knew it.

“You know what?”, he said then, “I want to start our relationship on the right foot”, he said, taking long, slow steps, like he was marching right back to the center of the circle, “this ugly duckling colluded against your group Rick…”, he said, “he a two-faced prick, and you know what? nobody likes a person you cannot trust”, he said simply, “that will always be there… whispering behind your back, looking to tumble the first domino, and… I just hate snitches”, he said.

It was one second.

Only one

One moment Negan was looking at Rick, with his back turned to the cars with the lights on, and the next? 

You saw a trail of blood flying, passing right in front of the lights and for a fraction of a second, it shone like glitter.

That was before you heard the screaming

“NO!”

When you managed to focus your gaze, half of Spencer’s face was completely destroyed, and a piercing scream cut through the night.

It was Deanna

You had never heard something so soul piercing, it made you shake as you fell on your side.

Negan was still on position, with his bat over his shoulder tainted with red

“Anybody moves… they’re next”, he said simply, and you heard several safeties being taken out. 

“No! NO!”, Deanna whined, as Negan bashed Spencer’s head in, again, and again, and again.

His movements were dramatic, exaggerated, blood, and pieces of guts flew in every direction, some even landed on Deanna.

His own mother

Spencer was an asshole, but killing him in front of his own mother?

This was sick

You wanted to throw up, but at the same time, you couldn’t take your eyes off of Spencer’s shape, there was no longer a head to look at at, it was only a bloody pile as Negan kept coming at it, again and again

Like he wanted to make it clear to you

That he wasn’t playing around. 

“Wow!”, he said, finally turning back, leaving the rest of Spencer alone, “I love some nightly workout, keep my juices flowing, can’t wait to get back home to all my wives!”, he said, “two weeks was it? three? too damn long if you ask me! I gonna screw them all”

The only thing you heard was Deanna’s screeches, as she twisted in pain, clutching at her own chest, not being able to move as she -as everyone- was being held at gunpoint.

This was sick

Negan stood there, like he just didn’t kill a person in the most sadistic way possible, cracking jokes and talking about screwing women.

“Spencer let us in the middle of the night, he surrendered his own community to us”, he said, this time, he was not smiling, “I don’t want to have him on my team and I don’t want you to have him on yours”, he said.

You finally managed to turn and look back at Rick, his eyes were red, and trailed on Spencer still, he couldn’t believe what was happening, neither could you, this was so surreal

“I really hope i made myself clear because i just love doing that”, he said, “so does lucille”

“We get it!”, said Michonne, “we do”

“I’m glad”, Negan said, “because I truly believe this could be the beginning of a very nice relationship”, he said, “I’m not an idiot, I know that you went out there, you know about the hilltop, I don’t want you to get ideas…”

“We are not getting anything”, Tyresse assured him… he was trying to keep it together, for the group. Finally he had snapped out of his tightening fear, and you were somewhat relieved. 

“I love this”, he admired, “I love that you are understanding, and I want you to see how reasonable I can be”, he said, “that’s why, nobody else needs to die tonight…”

You could feel relieved but Negan proved to be so unstable and unpredictable you didn’t know if this was good or bad.

“I said I wanted three for Lucille, I only took one, but I think… I’m not gonna kill any more of you, because that just won’t work with you people, right?”, his smile was unsettling, and he directed it straight at you, because of what you said, “I’ll just take the right people, and each time you do something wrong, I’ll kill them, right in the comfort of my home”, that seemed to snap Rick out of his stupor, 

“No…”, said Rick shakily, “take me, only me…”, Negan chuckled

“Ever the righteous hero! I love that, but that’s not gonna cut it, not really”, he said, “I need you here leading the efforts to get things for me Rick”, he said, then, he started walking around, watching at each and everyone of you, “though pickins though”, he said pensively, “I noticed that some people are missing”, Rick looked around nervously, “tough mission out there?”, he asked, and Rick barely nodded, “If I find them in a certain community I might rethink what I just said… Rick…”, he threatened.

So the rest of them were on the Hilltop? all of them?

“Damn… I wanted to ask Maggie to come back with me”, he said, “well… lets wrap this up I want to go back home already”

He pointed, at two people, and his goons grabbed them, you heard screams, but you couldn’t look, you were looking at Daryl

It was your turn to scream as he pointed the bat at him

“NO!”, you screamed, trying to get up, “don’t touch him!”, two saviors grabbed you as three others, including Dwight, grabbed Daryl and loaded him in the same van he had come in, “GIVE HIM BACK!”, you tried to fight them, you did, but they were stronger than you, you were tired, and you had been through so much in the last hours, you weren’t even a threat to them right now.

So you could do nothing as you saw how they took the love of your life, and your friends.

They throw you back into the ground when they realize you were no threat to them.

“Oh darling, I’d take you too”, Negan said, “but I need you here, I need you here to convince your friends to cooperate, because if they don’t… you know what’s gonna happen to your Daryl, right?”, he asked, and you nodded, “I’ll treat him good”, he assured you, as you met his gaze, “if he wants it, I’ll make him a soldier and he will live like a King…”

You knew Daryl was never going to go for that

“... don’t you worry”, he said, “I’ll be back in a couple of days, I’ll leave you so you’ll… gather your thoughts”, he walked away from you to address the rest again, “and I want you to know, I still like to very much kill Alexander, so if you see him… tell him I have his girl, because he is a coward and a deserter, let’s move out!”

You felt them around you, walking around, getting in their cars, and driving off, but you felt nothing, as your eyes were set on the gates.

They took Daryl.

“Deanna? Deanna!”, you heard around you, but you couldn’t make your eyes work, you couldn’t make your body react.

“You were right Rick”

“Deanna! we are gonna get some help! you are gonna be alright”

“Rick… you were right”, she said. 

Sorry for taking so long... I really wanted to make it intense but then I'm not sure I accomplished what I wanted

taglist @crazyunsexycool @capricxnt

[docholligay]

Bozeman Half Marathon 2024

The race starts at 8. The shuttle drops us off at 6:55. 

There was a little bit of fucking around too close to start time, so we ended up in the back of the pack. As I break over the start line, it’s immediately clear to me that I am behind people who are shooting for a 2:30 or more time, which is so beautiful and hope they had the best time but all of my encouragements to newer or slower runners immediately die away in a wave of “get the fuck out of my way.” I have never bobbed and weaved as I did here, and I get afraid that I’ll lose my pacer, because I am trying so hard to just get get out of the fracas. 

Mile 3. I call out, “What are we sitting at?” “9:05” comes the answer. I’ve been fucking around too much, and make a breakaway in between two runners in front of me. I’ve got to hit harder than this. 

My pacer grabs his stomach and steps off to the side. 

You’re a beautiful person, but this ain’t ‘nam, and I’m leaving your ass. I will buy you a drink later, salutations and good luck. 

I actually start running faster at this point--i hadn’t realized how much I was holding back because I sensed he was struggling and I didn’t want to leave him in the dust. I need something to pace me. My stryd isn’t connecting, i don’t even have a timer watch, and I didn’t set my music to time me like I usually do, until the tornado siren. There are two girls in matching outfits, including pink banana shorts. They’re the ones. They look fast. 

If it were not for them, I don’t know that I would have been able to get it back, because they got me into a rhythm of running about a 8:30 mile for two miles, which gave me a huge cushion. Mile 4 and 5 were entirely on their pink-festooned backs. They stopped for water mid Mile 6, and i kept going. 

Mile 7: What the fuck have I done wrong in my life, and why is it being visited upon me, the sweetest and most innocent of human beings, right now? There is a long, slow, plodding hill. 

There is a moment, in every race I have ever run, called, “What the fuck is my problem?” It is very important to get over the ‘What the fuck is my problem?” hump, because it is my own personal Jesus being tempted by Satan in the desert, with the idea of walking and giving up. Why would I, a sane woman with a loving family, think about running 13 miles and change full send? Did I think that would be fun? What about my life up to that point made me think it would be fun?

We have to attack this little demon inside us. We can always doubt the wisdom of our decisions later, but for now, the only way out is through, and my only reward for slowing down is that I have to be on the course longer. 

I round the corner, no longer on the hill, and then from behind me, the sound of a truck, and a voice I ahven’t heard in a while: 

“C’mon Doc, let’s fuckin go! It ain’t that far!” I look to my left, and it’s my buddy Jake! I haven’t seen him in a couple years, and he must have figured out it was me by sheer chance of “I bet that little red headed dyke in the unicorn shorts is Doc. She loves to run” and he is correct! He bangs twice on the side of his BLM truck, laughs, revs his engine at me, and drives on down the course. 

This carries me for a solid two miles. If your family has been in Montana for as long as both of ours have, it’s hard to hide from each other. Do i want to come across as a little bitch to Jake? Do i want to tell him it was just too fucking hard? Fuck no. 

The Tracer voice inside me, “What’s the worst that could ‘appen? Push it!” “We die?” “Not a problem we’d ave to deal with!” 

I push. I go. I fly through the cross country kids handing out water. I’m trying to pace myself beside runners just a little ahead of me, runners that look fast and also infuriatingly casual in their matching banana shorts and pink tank tops. They hold me on for the next few miles, but as they start into their negative splits (Unfortunately, they not only look fast, they are fast) they begin to leave me behind. 

I have heard the half marathon called “10 decent miles and then the worst 5k of your life” and for me, at the very least, that seems to hold true. I am getting exhausted by the time I hit mile ten, and my form is falling apart. I like like one of those inflatable noodle men, running down the street, limbs flopping. My body is swinging wildly, which is costing me energy, but I can’t stop myself. I’m getting tired mentally and physically. 

In  the middle of mile 11, I hit a pothole. I’m not watching what I’m doing, my foot goes directly onto the lip of the pothole and I go careening forward. I know it’s a cliche to say things happen in slow motion, but I swear it must have taken me ten seconds to fall. I had time to think about how I absolutely did not want to hurt my knee, so I, with a reasonable amount of stupidity, put my arm out straight, which keen-eyed viwers will note is a great way to break your wrist. I didn’t, so, unearned victory for me, but I slammed down hard into the asphalt, and threw myself onto my hip. 

A struggled for a minute, and then, as I held up my hand to stand, someone grabs it, without breaking his stride at all, and yanks me to my feet. 

“We’re fucking doing this!” he yells to me. 

And then he continues on. I could have given up, and my pride and my time are badly hurt, but having that moment gives it all back to me. I might not be able to run this in time, but I can run it to the end, and not give up. Giving up isn’t what I do. 

Unfortunately, to be the people we tell ourselves we are, we have to make the choices that make us those people. If I am a runner, who doesn’t give up. I need to both run, and not give up. Annoying. 

So I keep on. By the time we reach the city proper, I am in mile 12 of 13, and I am well and truly suffering. It hurts so bad, and I want to stop, but I can’t stop, because I am so close, and how much would I hate myself to run all this way and give up now? I can’t walk. I have to keep going. 

The tornado siren goes off in my ear. I have ten minutes to cross the finish line before losing my goal. I haven’t hit the final mile yet. This is bad. But the only way to get there faster, is to run faster. I have no idea what I drew on in that moment. But I find something deep inside me, and I yank it out and throw it on the road. 

I go down the final pull, praying, waiting for the final turn, where I can see the finish line. That always gives me something more, sets off a firework inside me. 

There’s a gal with a sign by the side of the road that says, “ ***ing finish so we can drink!” and, again, it is only through the encouragement of strangers that I have made it through this race at all. I point at her sign and smile, and she yells to me, “You know what I’m talking about! Fuck yeah! Go! Go!” 

This last mile is one of the hardest of my life. I just keep having to chant, ‘Right, left, repeat. Right, left, repeat.” 

The final turn! I can see the finish line, I only have to run three more stoplights before I make it. I can do it. I kick on the afterburner. I am so close. I’m almost there. 

My heart falls when I see the timer. 1:57:40. I’ve already failed. There’s no way I can cross the finish line in 15 seconds. Or can’t I? Fuck it, whatever, I will maybe not make it, but I will run as hard as I can. My hip is screaming, my form is the worst it has ever been, and I don’t care about absolutely fucking any of that, because if I cross even one second under, I will have made PR. 

I go. 

I cross the finish line, wobbling, half limping, about to throw up. I’ve made my time goal by about 3 seconds. Great. That’s enough. The guy giving out the medals is nice enough to come over and put it on my neck, because I look like I’m suffering as much as I am. The text comes through. 

I COMPLETELY FORGOT IT TOOK ME NEARLY A MINUTE TO CROSS THE START LINE. I have made my time by a full goddamn MINUTE. My joy is total. I would jump up and down screaming but I do not have even the slightest amount of energy for any of that. I have a can of champagne in my drop bag, and I am going to go get that, and crush it. 

Someday, I’ll stop setting PR, but today is not that day.

Video evidence of my extremely bad finish: You can tell how much I'm favoring my hip, which is making me swing my body WILDLY.