#i guess to make up for it i played the entire final stretch of ff3. but i actually like that one.

[bluebudgie]

Fun fact: 2 years ago Lou and I decided to play through the entire* FF series together. And liveblog it all on twitter. The plan worked just fine until we finished FF4 and made the grave mistake to play FF4: The After Years. We're still there. I want to move on. Forget about this mistake in gaming history. But my girlfriend is stubborn and wants to finish this pile of garbage. Like we could be playing FF5 right now but instead every few months we look at each other and go "we're still in the final dungeon of the after years". And then do nothing about it

I feel like we could have gone through the whole series during the time we stalled getting it over with this stupid spin off.

*possibly stopping after 12, maybe 13 if we /really/ feel it or find a way to play it (my ps3 refuses to read the disc. like it just blocked me from ever beating the final boss)

[superthatguy62]

Final Fantasy III Fun Facts of the Whenever: Retcon Edition

The Pixel Remaster of Final Fantasy III marks the first time the Famicom script has received an (official) english translation. Being an easy source for comparison, it’s clear that the FFIII remake makes some changes to the overall plot; And not just the obvious change of the main protagonists.

Here’s some of those (spoilers, I guess?)

1: The Protagonists

First, let’s address the elephant in the room.

Luneth was conceptualized from the Onion Knights in the first place.

Arc is based somewhat on an NPC outside of Kazus.

 Ingus is based on a soldier from Sasune during the curse.

Refia is the odd one out: Not only is she not based on an existing character (as far as I can tell), but it’s emphasized via an NPC that Takka lives alone (which might explain why the devs put her with Takka to begin with.

2: Cid

Related to the above, Cid was heavily implied (but not directly said) to have worked for Saronia prior to the Flood of Darkness in the remake.

In the Famicom version, however, he used to work for Argus and even built airships for them. While Cid working for Argus isn’t impossible in the remake, he never mentions it.

ADDENDUM: A soldier’s line in the remake shows that Cid and Argus became friends and did airship research.

3. The Floating Continent

A significant late-game plot twist in the remake is the revelation that the floating continent was created due to Xande causing the imbalance, which tore the continent out of the earth and hurled it into the sky.

In the Famicom version, there was a similar plot twist. However, it wasn’t Xande who created the continent: It was Owen.

The Saronia Library’s Book of Owen 1 and Ancient Book 2 reveal that the ancients planned the continent’s ascension and location, probably as part of their enlightenment prior to the Flood of Light. Interestingly, Book of Owen 1 does not mention Owen lifting the continent despite a fan-translation doing so.

ADDENDUM: While I didn’t mention it before, this has the knock-on effect of changing the time Desch became frozen: In the Famicom timeline, this occurs DURING the Wrath of Light. In the Remake timeline, it occurs AFTER. 

4: The Earth Crystal

In the original Famicom FF3, Xande is specifically mentioned to have used the Earth Crystal as part of his scheme to flood the world with darkness. The remake removes this... for some unknown reason, despite a continent being ripped away due to the Earth Crystal not being much of a stretch.

As an aside, the scene regarding the fake crystal Goldor had is part of the plot dump as a result, rather than being a separate scene, optional scene. The fact that Xande used it also pretty clearly implies that it’s in the Crystal Tower somewhere; in the remake, Doga says that its location is unknown (the Crystal’s speech implies that Xande’s still using it in the remake, but it’s vague enough whether it means that Xande only started using it after the world was restored, or if he was using it the entire time.

5: Time and the Xande

Normally, I avoid stuff that the remake adds that doesn’t necessarily contradict the original (or whatever it is I actually mean and am failing to articulate), but this is a very special case: The remake heavily plays up the time stop nature of the flood of darkness and Xande’s motive is specifically said to be an attempt to regain his immortality, to the point where Xande himself gloats about it before the fight.

By contrast, the Pixel Remaster never really calls attention to it.

ADDENDUM: Again, this has a knock-on effect, but on a grander scale: Unei eventually confirms that Xande was indeed frozen as a result of his actions, meaning that most of the issues the Floating Continent faced were actually due to the Cloud of Darkness. This includes the Great Earthquake that kicks off the game.

Speaking of the Cloud of Darkness, the reveal that Xande was under its’ influence is also glossed over in a single line by Unei. The remake goes further by having the Warriors of Darkness further explain how Xande fell under the CoD’s control.

Also, the Curse of the Five Wyrms (the curse that freezes anyone who looks into the mirror in place) kinda exists, except now Xande intends to feed the kids to Wyrms.

So yeah

[fyx-ation]

So, uh... that FFXV was a thing, wasn’t it?

It sure was, Bill... it sure as shit was.

So, yeah, I finally played and, just a moment ago, beat Final Fantasy XV.

I’m about to sum up my feelings on the game, many of which are shared with the general gaming community, so I might have nothing new to add at this point... But I feel strongly enough to keep writing, anyhow.

If you’re bothered by that sort of thing, scroll on.

Sometimes, in grade schools across the world, teachers feel the need to give every single child an award. Usually there’s nothing to it. Some might spring for a ribbon, others might give out trophies, and even fewer might elect to have other students create rewards for the recipients. The latter was my personal case in middle school. A boy, whose name escapes me because the entire affair was almost forgettable except for the reward, gave me the Most Potential award. Every other student made small bundles of candy or bought some small token for their reward recipient. I got... A small piece of notebook paper cut into the shape of a ribbon.

Most Potential.

I’m not sure if a more insulting award exists in the entire world.

What does this have to do with anything? I think you’re smart enough to see where I’m going.

Final Fantasy is quite possibly the franchise that made me a gamer. I played the first one the NES when I was a child, and I’m certain it was one of the first RPGs I had ever played. By middle school, when I was playing FF3 (really VI), I was knee deep in love with the genre and carving my path with a shovel made out of Blockbuster rental cases.

What I’m getting at is that my opinion on the franchise carries weight because I’m getting to be an old fart. I’ve seen the good, the bad, the ugly. I started out as Relm, and now I am becoming Cid (pick one).

When the game loads, the screen tells you that XV is for fans and first timers. My gut reaction to this was a big, fat, pessimistic, “Yeah, we’ll see.” XIII left me feeling like someone clipped my purse strings and ran off cackling into the night. Must stay on subject.... must... not... rant...

Well, I saw. I came, I saw, I conquered.

I didn’t hate it.

I didn’t love it, either. And here’s where the award comes in.

You, Final Fantasy XV, are the proud recipient of the Most Potential award. I’m even going the extra mile and writing this in a digital format rather than on notebook paper, so you can cherish it forever... as long as you have electricity.

What a hot-ass mess. Here are my beefs in broad strokes:

The combat feels sloppy. I know SE is trying desperately to get into the action RPG thing with FF because they feel like turn-based games are archaic and no one wants to play them. Fine. Whatever. That’s what made you a thing... but whatever. The problem is that they didn’t do a very good job with this. Kingdom Hearts does it amazingly well. Any Tales game puts it to shame.

Can I tell you a secret? You can laugh at me; it’s okay. I didn’t know you could just hold O to fight until I already had 80 hours on the game. Yep. I played that much just mashing O and square and warping. I spent untold minutes grinding my teeth during the Leviathan fight because nothing was happening. I kept missing an invisible quick-time event, apparently. IDK. (I researched it and others had the same problem? No clue.)

As a whole, the combat just felt very clunky and almost as if the AI was too smart. Maybe I should have played all the tutorials at the beginning. Who knows!

And magic sucked. So much suck. Friendly fire? REALLY? REALLY? THAT’S THE ROAD YOU CHOSE?

Hmm. what else.

Oh, you know how in some console RPGs, you can change the tactics in the menu to control the behavior of other characters in your party? Or you can switch who you want to play? None of that here. The other bros forget they have a spell equipped most of the time. But when they remember, you can be sure it’s when you’re in the thick of things so you can take that friendly fire. MMM Mmm. Good stuff.

Speaking of bros... the male gaze stuff was gross. They changed Ignis’ outfit so hit butt wasn’t hanging out, sure. But Cindy... the mechanic... boobs. Does not compute. Girl, get you some damn overalls so you don’t get burned.

I guess this Fantasy includes spark free machines.

So, then there’s the story. I won’t spoil what little story there is for folks that haven’t played it. I might spoil your urge to play it if you haven’t been able to yet. Sorry.

The game has some pretty amazing world-building. That’s not the same as the story, so don’t get excited. You get a general sense of history and a little bit of mythos. But it needed so much more to aid the story. People are so damned thirsty for lore that they’re theorycrafting THE FUCKING STORY for XV. It’s not in the game. They’re pulling shit out of thin air. Check Youtube, and you’ll get lost in a sea of “Ardyn’s TRUE name,” “The meaning of the true ending,” or “Eos Explained!” Yeah, okay, reeeeeeach for it.

And let’s not forget Kingsglaive and Brotherhood. Kingsglaive is a CG movie that accompanies the game. I enjoyed it. I watched it before I played the game (months before oops), because I was gifted both as a package deal. Problem is, Kingsglaive has some precious story that the game so desperately needed, it should have been IN THE GAME. And Brotherhood, the anime, should have been in the game as well. Maybe as flashbacks while camping. Yet even with both of these optional purchases, it’s still missing a truckload of substance.

Sadly, I think they tried to make up for it by putting a pace car in the game. That’s not even a cute metaphor; they really physically put in crap to slow you down. There’s a stamina bar for running, there’s a stamina bar on chocobos, and the Regalia has a set speed it cannot exceed (unless you get parts like the turbocharger several hours into the game). You can fast travel to your car, and you can get in your car and sometimes fast travel to quests or destinations (which, after chapter 13 seemed to be much more frequent unless I’m imagining it). However, sometimes you are forced to sit through minutes and minutes of scenic driving. And even that gets interrupted by a certain bro with a camera fetish. It felt very forced, and I fast traveled everywhere when given the opportunity. I somehow still wound up with 100+ hours on the game. Curse you, gambling and fishing.

The DLC episodes for each bro could have provided the game with a little more substance, too, but SE decided to nickel and dime their patrons for those. It’s becoming a trend that I hate. It’s like selling a jigsaw puzzle and then charging extra for 2-3 pieces that would complete the picture. Fuck a bunch of that.

Another thing that I felt was intentionally annoying stretched out: maps. Lestallam, or however you spell it, was laid out like a street gang’s fantasy. Lots of dead ends, terrible mini-map... just... please.. where’s my car... why is the big market tucked into the ass end of of Satan’s colon instead of on the main circuit WHERE A MARKET BELONGS?

My final Final Fantasy XV beef: TIME TRAVELING! choo choo all aboard the-woops-we-can’t-fix-this-shit train. No, there isn’t actual time-traveling in the game. Not really. Beyond a certain chapter, there is no way to return to Altissia or Lucis. SE handled this the way a dog does when it has a dingleberry. They dragged their ass on the floor until... no, no, I kid. They put in a menu that let’s you zip back to those two places without any explanation. You can do quests and hunts and get exp and items. Then, you can zip back to the “present” with all of those rewards. Hahahaha makes perfect sense, right? Riiiiiight? lolno.

It’s not part of the canon. You’re not dreaming or having a flashback or pulling an Assassin’s creed. They just added it in because otherwise you could plow through several chapters with no way of going back. It would be impossible to go back to those places (for lolstory reasons). They put in a point of no return and then were like, “Just kidding?” 

Imagine if in VI you could play all the way to Kefka’s Tower and then, with zero explanation, a save point gives you the option to return to the World of Balance. Bit of a head-scratcher, eh?

They had to do it, though. Remember that substance thing? A lot of it comes from the sparse side quests, fishing, hunting, optional junk-getting. If you’re not interested in any of that, you could skip returning to the “past” altogether.

It had a lot of potential. Unlike a person getting that award, it doesn’t get a chance to better itself. They continue to drop patches on it but nothing that can fix the story. 

I’m not sorry I played it. I did put 100+ hours on it, after all. I liked the characters (even if Noctis appears to grow into a Caucasian man and his eyes change color... um... what?). I liked the world.  It needed a lot more fine-tuning and character development, though. As I said to a few people already: it felt like a love letter to Final Fantasy rather than an actual Final Fantasy game.

It sort of suffered that same thing XIII did with FF mythos being tacked on but not nearly as badly. Throw in some chocobos. Bitches love chocobos. And a moogle. Just the one; don’t get carried away.

Bravely Default was a damn good Final Fantasy game (if you can get over the repetition) and it wasn’t even a FINAL FANTASY GAME.

Yeah, I’ll shutup now.