#i guess i really do have to watch RGU some day

[doloresdisparue]

The scene above is also a pointed dig at Freudian psychoanalysis and the whole Oedipus/Elektra complex thing that sought to normalize these ideas in the open (and did do enormous damage to the general understanding of CSA) because Nabokov hated Freuds guts for exactly that reason. It pops up several times throughout the novel in pointed asides even on top of the general way Humbert's abuse is allowed to go on because of his position as a patriarchal authority figure. It's even more clear in the paragraph proceeding the bit that @rilkeannheart quoted here (as well as how much Humbert delights in his power knowing that he can frame himself as a protector with this rethoric despite having done this exact thing to her):

But now, I am just your old man, a dream dad protecting his dream daughter. “My chère Dolorès! I want to protect you, dear, from all the horrors that happen to little girls in coal sheds and alley ways, and, alas, comme vous le savez trop bien, ma gentille , in the blueberry woods during the bluest of summers. Through thick and thin I will still stay your guardian, and if you are good, I hope a court may legalize that guardianship before long. Let us, however, forget, Dolores Haze, so-called legal terminology, terminology that accepts as rational the term ‘lewd and lascivious cohabitation.’ I am not a criminal sexual psychopath taking indecent liberties with a child. The rapist was Charlie Holmes; I am the therapist—a matter of nice spacing in the way of distinction

Humbert also specifically knows his role as a patriarch allows him further liberties to molest Dolores than he would have as an unrelated man and it is what drives him to marry her mother in the first place (and again we have a reference to a literary canon that legitimizes his behavior):

Suddenly, gentlemen of the jury, I felt a Dostoyevskian grin dawning (through the very grimace that twisted my lips) like a distant and terrible sun. I imagined (under conditions of new and perfect visibility) all the casual caresses her mother’s husband would be able to lavish on his Lolita. I would hold her against me three times a day, every day. All my troubles would be expelled, I would be a healthy man. “To hold thee lightly on a gentle knee and print on thy soft cheek a parent’s kiss …” Well-read Humbert!

Then, figuratively speaking, I shattered the glass, and boldly imagined (for I was drunk on those visions by then and underrated the gentleness of my nature) how eventually I might blackmail—no, that is too strong a word— mauvemail big Haze into letting me consort with little Haze by gently threatening the poor doting Big Dove with desertion if she tried to bar me from playing with my legal stepdaughter.

And as is repeated in this post, this is a logical extension of the existing patriarchal structures and Humbert sees that too and he relishes it, as the first quote above already showed. He doesn't see any conflict between thinking of Dolores as his daughter and his sexual subject, they go hand in hand, he is living the ultimate patriarchal fantasy in his mind.

(Lolita, with an incestuous thrill, I had grown to regard as my child)

one of rgu's best takes about rape and incest is that rape and incest are not deviant. they are exceedingly normal. they are, in fact, the logical extension of patriarchal romance and the patriarchal family -- the same logic that underpins those structures facilitates abuse, rape, incest, and csa. many people, even those who nominally understand the idea of rape culture, conceive of rape as a deviation from cultural mores, and even more people view incest as an aberration, a twisting of the Family (which is Good) into something unnatural and evil. but rgu correctly identifies that rape and incest are outgrowths of patriarchal society, not alien intrusions upon it. incest is merely a symptom of the problem which is the patriarchal family itself. rape and domestic abuse are merely symptoms of the problem which is patriarchal & heteronormative romance and society itself. rather than rape being deviant, it is resistance to patriarchy which is deviant; rather than incest being abnormal, it is a girl holding out a hand to another girl in pain which is abnormal. because 'abnormal' does not mean 'bad' any more than 'normal' means 'good'. "fall in love normally, get married normally, have a normal family, and have a normal life -- but normal has nothing to do with us!"

[codenamesailordarillium]

do you watched anime series and ghibli films?

Oh dear, Aparna I am so very sorry I didn't notice you sent this ask over a month ago. 😭

In terms of anime I used to watch lots more frequently back when I was in high school. A lot of the shows I watched were an obvious escape. In adult life tho, I haven't really watched as much anime as I used to back when I was a teenager.

I really enjoyed My Happy Marriage when it was coming out last year (is it primarily because it heavily reinforced my fangirl crush on the English voice actor for Lurd Kudou who I mainly know for being a Youtube funny boi .. maybe lol).

I believe that was also when I finally got caught up with s3 of SM Crystal + the Eternal movies. Honestly I'd done that in anticipation for the Cosmos movies but they don't seem to have gone straight to N/etflix internationally the way the Eternal movies did back when there were still some semblance of C*vid restrictions. I technically have a VPN I could probably use to see if it's available elsewhere, but my experience with VPNs in the time I've tried them has been a lil bit lackluster, so idk, we'll see what I'll do about that eventually. 🤷‍♀️

My best friend got me interested in watching RGU as well, but I kind of fell off my initial watch thru .. which I'm realizing was also sometimes early last year. I have been thinking about getting back into it lately tho, so hopefully I can carve out some time for that eventually. I want to see the entire series first and then the movie to see where they differ, I've been informed the endings are very different. From what I can tell I'll probably prefer the movie ending. 🤔

I also only recently noticed that there was a Violet Evergarden movie released back in 2k20 that I didn't know about, so I definitely want to watch that eventually as well.

You can probably see a pattern with a lot of what I watch lol. I think over the years it's become apparent I'm drawn to pretty shoujo/magical girl/romantic aesthetic anime more than the types of anime that get super popular, which tend to be shounen action-y stuff. I guess the one exception (sort of) was that I watched the live action OP last year. The anime was literally my favorite back in high school, I'm telling you I was watching like 6-8 episodes per day back then, maybe? Just to get caught up with where the anime was at the time lol. I don't have much enthusiasm about getting back into the anime, but the live action version definitely reignited my love for the series so I'm looking forward to the next season.

As for Ghibli movies, I always preferred Spirited Away and Howl's Moving Castle over everything else. I haven't really watched any of them in a long time either tho. 😅