#i gotta learn to pick a tag for my rants

[whalleyrulz]

inclusivity v diversity

i really dislike the term "inclusive" when used to discuss art and try my hardest to avoid it. diversity, i love. everyone should be diverse on purpose in their stories. but fuck a inclusivity checklist

(diverse on purpose meaning, think about your diversity in everything, and make your characters as diverse as fits the story. don't just assume your real life normal, or what a list of unrepresented archetypes, is what the story needs)

the thing is, like, you can write a book, make a movie, tell a story with nothing but white cis men in it all you want. you can write a great one! but it'll only be great (to me, i know i know, everyone has different tastes) if you're deliberately making it only have white cis men

and you can write an absolutely dogshit book that has all KINDS of inclusive checks marked off. i won't be shady here, i'm not thinking of that one. or that one. i AM thinking of that one though. yes we agree.

there's this apocryphal story about the van damme movie "sudden death"

it came out came out a little bit after die hard, that was trying to be the "next" die hard. dogshit movie, the "gimmick" was that it was set at a hockey stadium it bombed, because it sucked! but one of the execs who signed off on it is quoted as yelling, in fury, about it bombing, "How could it fail? We had so many hostages."

apocryphal? sure, probably

but there really is this whole slew of people who see art and humanity as nothing but checkboxes--and quality just doesn't exist to them

it's like when you're a kid, and you don't have a concept of things being bad, so EVERYTHING you engage with is the best it can possibly be, and everything came out perfect and deserves total love

there's people who never learned to understand quality, so they just. quantify everything.

"inclusivity" checkboxes and trying to promote shit by talking about how inclusive it is feels immature in that specific way to me. like the entirety of human experience and conditions can be summed up by copying the cast of a burger king kid's meal

[valscodblog]

ℙ𝕀𝕊𝕋𝕆𝕃𝔸 -Part two

Warnings: Mentions of death (obvi-it's call of duty y'all.), in-depth past explanation, OC being forced to take up a role she never wanted, very very very VERY slight mentions of sexual themes (like-one or two sentences), trust issues at it's finest, and that's around it.

Alejandro Vargas x OC

Credits to OC: ME MYSELF AND IIIIIII~~ (Uhm-anyways-)

[{TAGS! <3 : @seconds-over-first @thebunnednun @writing-with-moss }]

Alejandro felt like he had been shot through the heart. "I-What have I ever done to you, to make you reluctant to trust me, Linda?" Maria shook her head, "It's-It's not you, Alejandro...it's just-personal." Alejandro nodded. "I understand. Yo Entiendo." Maria gave him a soft smile-she smiled!-and then walked away. Alejandro nearly died right then. Rodolfo smirked at put a hand on Alejandro's shoulder. " Su maldito desesperado, coronel," Rudy joked, and his higher-up sighed. "Yo se, Rudy...Pero...." "Pero Nada, Amigo. You love her. That's it." "Not so loud, Pendejo!" "We're mexican! We're loud!" "Parra!" "Okay, okay! Don't kill me, Alejandro!" "Mhhh, i should...I really should. But-alas, I can't."

"Say-Pistola, why do they call ye tha', aye?" "Because." "It means Poistol, doon'it?" Soap asked, "So that means-ye must be handy wit one!" Maria groaned and rubbed her face. "If i say yes, will you shut up?" "Nay, prolly not, bonnie." "Don't call me bonnie-" "Bonnie, bon-bon, bonnibell, bonnie-boo," Soap teased, and Maria looked over to Alejandro and mouthed, "Im going to kill you, Pendejo." He just laughed. Maria looked back over to Ghost and Soap-who were...flirting? Talking? How could you tell, honestly? "...Are you two...Novios?" "Huh?" Ghost said, quirking a brow up, "I asked if you two are dating, Fantasma." Ghost shook his head. "No-why would we be?" He snorted, and Soap laughed. "Okay...Although, I hope you two know, that I will be teasing you now." "Aboot...?" "Dating. Because y'all act like a married couple."

"Hey-quick question-why'd'ye sound like yer from Texas or sum?" Ghost asked, and Maria gave him a deadpan stare. "...The border? I live on the fuckin' Boarder?" Maria said, quirking a brow of her own up. Ghost then put his brow back down and then raised both of them this time, "Ah..." what was he supposed to say after a lady just told you that and clearly wasn't liking you? "So-You grew up knowing how to fight, Alejandro says." "Yeah. I did..." Ghost sighed.

"Well-" "If your trying to flirt with me, i suggest you learn a few new pick up lines other than whatever the fuck your on, Ghost." Simon blinked. "Love, i assure you, I'm not takin' a shinin' t'ya." "Good. Because I'm not on the market." "Oh?" Well, she's interesting...Simon sorta was starting to like her. "So..." "So?" "...What's anotha way to say "I came inside of a woman," Pistola?" "...What?" "Loadin' tha dishwasha." And Pistola nearly laughed, but she caught herself and just choose to quirk a brow up and shut her eyes. "Funny." and Ghost smiled behind his mask-but not a nice one, oh no. An annoyed one.

"Hmm, your not laughin' though?" "Yeah-lost my ability to year ago." "Ooh...damn, thats gotta suck f'ya, Lovie." "Oh yeah, it does."

And Alejandro looked over to Maria and frowned. "Here we go..." he muttered to Rudy. Rudy shook his head before saying, "She's not a litle kid, Amigo. She can flirt if she wants-" "Not with that gringo!" "Alejandro!" "....Mhhhph, I just don't like how she won't even look at me half the time i talk to her-but this, this guy! He just shows up and it's all 'Ohh let me stare at him-let me make eye contact!' Like, Pendeja! Por favor, why do you treat him like an old friend, huh?"

and Rudy leaned into Alejandro, arm on shoulder, and said, "Jelous, Ale?" "No-why?" "...Pinche mentiroso..." "No soy!" "Si tu eres! You ranting like-" "Dont." "Si, senor..." Alejandro went back to looking at Maria, whom was still talking to ghost and Soap. He hummed again before saying, "Alright, maybe i am...just a little. Un Puco." Rudy grinned. "First step's admitting it, Alejandro." "Yo se..."

"Right-so...what do I say, Alejandro?" Maria mumbled, more to herself than anything, really. BUt the man caught it and said, "You introduce yourself, tell them your New rank, Maria, and tell them you'll be leading this squad. Okay, mi amor?" "Not your love." And Alejandro sighed softly. "You know how i mean it, Maria...right?" "Claro que si. I just-don't. Just don't, okay?" "Claro, Maria." "Grasias, Ale-" "Maria! Here you are, thought we lost ya!" "Juan Price." "Erm-it's John." "Oh, so sorry, I'm Mexican, Sir." "It's fine, it's fine." "John Price! Ey, one capitan, to another, this is the easy part." "True..."

Alejandro quirked a brow up. "You two, know each other?" "We've met, yes. Back in, what was it?" "Ahh, good ol' Brittan-the country side, right?" "Indeed," Price agreed, smiling. "By the way! How's it coming along for you?" Maria asked, Price sighed and shook his head. "Hassan's still causing problems, so what does that tell you?" "Horrid." "Worse than." "Oof, i feel for you, John." "So, when-"

"Maria, it's time," Alejandro said into her ear and she said, "Fine fine...Sorry John we'll have to catch up later. I have to meet new squad." "Steaming Jesus-right before a mission?" "It's my family curse-we're alwasy last minuet and the people around us are affected too." "Well-i'll let you go before i get affected, huh?" "Hmph, yeah, see you, Price." and Maria walked away. Alejandro stayed behind and said, "That scoff? That's her laugh...consider yourself a trusted allay to Los Vaqueros now, Price." and he clapped John on the shoulder, shook it, and then let go and jogged to catch up to Maria.

Rodolfo was there, already telling the squad a new Captain was to command them and the rest of Maria's new squad just tensed. A new Captain? Oh, Jesus, that was never good...the last one was dead, sure, but this new one? They would have to learn how to read and how to act around this new person.

Or so they thought. It was just Maria.

"Oh! The Corp finally moved up, huh?" Private Diaz asked, and Maria sighed, "Here we go..."

"WHy now, out of all times?"

"HOW DID SHE GET TO MAKE THAT BIG OF A MOVE?"

"Wow...she really just left us in the dust, sucking off Alejandro must help a fair ton."

"For real. Prolly added in a few extra rounds to ensure her new place too."

Alejandro quirked a brow up and was about to say something when Maria shouted, "IF YOU LOVE YOUR MOM'S, SHUT IT!" and everyone shut up-minus one rookie who thought she was joking around.

BANG!

"Any? Body? Else?" Maria asked, her single hand still holding her pistol sideways. The person who spoke had been shot in the leg. "No? Good...now, rule one, i ever hear you talking behind my back again, you'll end up worse than that boy there, okay? Bueno. Dos, listen to rule one." Everyone nodded.

"Maria-that wasn't legal." "And what are you going to say, huh? Nada because if you report me, you'll be asked why you didn't step in." and Rudy shut up. "Damn-she's better than I thought at this," Alejandro said, smiling proudly.

"Well...let's get this mission over with and the lines drawn, yeah?" Maria muttered, Alejandro nodded...but as he started to explain, Maria started to zone out, she didn't feel safe, and this is how she dealt with that feeling.

"Ma? ...Mama? M-...MAMA?" Maria shouted, running into her mother's room as she heard what sounded like fighting. "Mami-mami!" her little brother screamed-in pain. "Eres igual que tu papá, chico..."

"MAMA-ALTO! Whatever he did-"

"No hablo ingles a Me, nina..."

Maria just stared at her mother-not hearing anything but the high pitched ringing in her ears. She had to run-hide. After she was done with her brother-she was next. and in for worse. Maria did run-into the room. She grabbed her four year old brother and then, as fast as her legs could carry the both of them, she ran out of the bedroom and down the stairs. She ran to the front door, and tried to open it-locked. She unlocked it but her brother wouldn't stop fighting her movements. "You'll just make it worse, Hermana! Stop-please!" "Shhh, dont speak English, Nino! Why do you think your being beat!?" and her brother shut up and chose just to sob into her shoulder. "Poor thing...if only Dad-"

"Tu padre ya no está aquí, no estará por mucho tiempo… Ya tendré tiempo…Es hora de pensar en una mentira… Es hora de hacer que parezca un accidente..."

No-Nononono-She heard the trigger of a gun and then she heard the recoil. It didn't hit her, however. "...Alex?" "Ma...Ri...A..." was his last word and Maria snapped. Thirteen, and she snapped. She dropped her little brother and charged at the drunken woman. Her mother was skinny-she wasn't. She had been working out for the last three years in secret. She threw a punch to her mother and her mom took it harshly. She toppled over, dropping the gun. It would've been funny to Maria if she wasn't so far gone in the moment. Maria then picked up the gun and said, "I'll talk how i want-and just so you know, Dad will know...and then he'll see to it that you get what you deserve..."

"Live, Pendeja...Live knowing I only let you becuase your husband and the god you so claim to love will punish you. They'll punish you so harshly-so badly...that you wish that i killed you-that one day, when we meet again, you will Beg Me to kill you...understand me? And know, that I no longer am a fucking Rodriguez, but instead, a Sanchez-como me Papa!" Maria said, sounding ever so calmly. She then laid the gun down on her mother's chest, and left the house.

She never went back. She found her uncle, and asked to stay with him instead, and her uncle, the evil bastard said yes. So she lived with him and was trained by him for War.

"Maria-MARIA SANCHEZ! Are you listening to a word that Alejandro just said to you?" Maria blinked and muttered, "Que?" Rodolfo sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. "Alejandro-get your damn girlfriend." Alejandro, who had been talking to one of the rookies, looked over and said, "No eres mi novia, Rudy...solo una amiga importante." And Maria groaned, "Shut it, Alejandro."

Maria walked away and muttered, "I have to stop zoning out..." Alejandro jogged after her-again. "Alejandro-" "I know what your going to say, so just don't! Instead, Escuchame!" Maria nodded, but kept walking. "So...Maria...do you, uhhm..Wanna go get something to eat after this?" Maria stopped dead. "You asking me out, Alejandro?" Alejandro sighed, "Not like-romanticly or anything! Just-you know, a couple of friends going out to eat." Maria laughed softly and said, "You know, I don't trust that...just us two-and i've never seen you outside of work...i don't know you-and you don't know me, Ale."

"I know-pero-i wanna take you out, okay? Tu eres muy linda, bonita, ermosa, and not to seem like im kissing your ass or anything but-" "Vargas. Your already kissing my ass." "Oh, shhh! Let a man talk to you for once, Maria!" Maria laughed again before nodding. "Sure, Vargas. Talk." "Grasias! Dios mio...okay, where was I?" "Oh so this was rehersed?" "In the mirror to myself." "Alejandro Vargas!" "What? Im telling you the truth!"

"Oh my god, fine! I'll go out with you-but no where cheap! Make an impression if you want this chica to stay around. Dont ask or tell me where, just take me. Okay?" and she winked.

Alejandro felt like he had been shot through the heart again-but this time...by cupid's bow.

[hiding-in-the-vault]

Hi there! It’s been a few days but I’m back. Twitchcon has been fun, huh? In the spirit of the Dream and Friends panel, my question today is less of a question and more of a request. Shout out another blog, whether they’re a beloved mutual or someone you’ve never spoken to but just think is cool, and say something nice about them!

-🐝

Hello!!! :) !

mmhmh I am incapable of picking a single person oops. I am also incapable of picking multiple people without setting some sort of outside qualifier to narrow it down. THEREFORE, these are probably going to appear a little random but there's a running theme in my brain #trust

@elmhat :) no I'll never get tired of singing the praises of tumblr user elmhat. But that aside, to me, you were the first of the fresh blood to appear after dsmp came to a close. With the end of anything, people worry that the excitement around it will fade. And it has to some degree, but you and several others were proof that theres still content to be made and shared, and that's what its all about! So it goes without saying that I adore everything you put out and the eagerness in which you do it; always excited to see some elm on the dash~

@grayyskies You showed up outta nowhere with some BANGER c!dream art that still makes me feel insane when I think about it. Especially with not being a new account, having to fend off people being weird with a broom, gotta respect the hustle ;') And the way you rant in the tags absolutely makes my day every time heheh (this is not me prodding for more art no what are you eventalkingaboutshhshshhh)

@calamari-mcyt-corner I learned about your existence somewhat recently and very quickly saw that you're just having a good time with your blorbos and I really really love that for you. I think playing around with the characters and just doing whatever you want is very representative of the spirit of fandom. I haven't interacted with you much myself, but I enjoy seeing your contributions to dreblr! Both here on tumblr, and your activity in the discord server ;D

[firecrackerhh]

I had got the stupidest ask in my inbox the other day. For context I have a side blog that mostly dead until I can find out what I want to do with it for now. Wendigo-Radio I got told basically that if I treat the wendigo like a myth it will come and get me. And I was appropriating Native American culture by saying the word wendigo. And the entire time there is a Wendigo tag, supernatural still has fans, and 2,740 fic results on AO3. Not to mention that Stephen King's pet cemetery has a wendigo in the book and YouTube has like million videos.

Native American women are going missing with out a trace it barley talked about in the news but if telling people not to say wendigo is the best use of their time who am I to judge. (Sorry about my rant that really grinds my gears)

Nah I getcha.

Look, I don’t exactly have a right to talk shit about anyones religious practices or culture or whatever else, but from my understanding, the wendigo is just…a mythological creature meant to represent famine, greed, starvation, something along those lines, it’s a myth.

And like any myth, it’s gonna get warped and twisted around by other cultures, it’s just how stories work.

I frankly refuse to believe that the majority of Algonquin people give a rats ass enough about it to make a fuss, and the people who ARE making a fuss and making Viv and others out to be disrespectful heathens who will fear the mighty wrath of the dreaded wendigo…nah man, sit the fuck down and shut the fuck up. Your beliefs aren’t worth shit, you sound like a clown, be serious for a second.

What’s funny tho? I swear to god dude, every person I’ve ever seen bitch about it? They aren’t even native themselves! Or at least, if they are native, they ain’t Algonquin.

And I’m just keeping it real when I tell you that seeing those motherfuckers do that fucking censor bullshit to the word is so…ridiculous? Like look, y’all can do what you want, but I don’t think it’s healthy to live your life in fear under the possibility of reprisal of a being that isn’t fucking real.

Like I’ll see bitches do the same thing with the word God. Like…dude, I don’t think He cares if you type out the word…I imagine God has soooo many other things to give a flying fuck about, like famine, war, those shitty evangelical preachers who use His name for their own selfish ends, I think He has better shit to worry about! It’s not like you’re using His name in vain, chill out.

…sorry back on a more relevant topic, of course there’s certainly far more pressing issues the Native American community has to worry about than someone using a mythological creature in a cartoon or movie or whatever, I just think people latch onto tiny not-really-a-problem problems because the actual problems are more complicated, or at least, they’re issues most people outside of that community don’t give a fuck about (such as disappearing native women) because of the racist society the native Americans have had to suffer from for centuries.

Hell, I would argue those people who wear war bonnets when they haven’t actually earned one is significantly more fucking disrespectful than anyone making or watching wendigo depictions in media.

It is also from my understanding that Native reservations are uh…bad. Like, everyone is poor, the American government sure af aren’t helping them out, like I’m no expert on literally any of this so y’all can do your own research if you want, I just know the situation isn’t good.

I get people focus on the small shit mainly because they can’t really do anything about the bigger, more important shit, but like…I dunno man, you gotta learn to pick and choose your battles, and the wendigo one isn’t really worth it imo.

I think sometimes people just like making things out to be a problem when it’s just…not? Like cmon man, is doing all this bullshit really helping anyone? Or do you just want an excuse to be self righteous?

You aren’t helping anyone by defending the honor of a mythological creature or whatever, you’re honestly no better than those Christians who say everyone else is gonna go to hell for whatever arbitrary reason, just cuz your beliefs aren’t as widespread as the Abrahamic religions doesn’t make that kind of behavior fucking acceptable, please find an actual important problem to bitch about. You have plenty of options.

🔥🧨~Firecracker out~🧨🔥

[zoeythebee]

Coding Language Tag Game!

Rules: Talk about your most favorite and least favorite coding languages, and tag more codeblrs to do the same

Tagged by @vexacarnivorous

My Favorite and Least Favorite Programming Language

I got tagged in a post tag game, which means I get to rant about programming languages!

My Favorite(s)

is tied between Lua and C. I want to try out Odin as well, and Jai when it comes out. But for now its the former two. And the reason why they are tied is because I like them for different reasons.

So for C I just am in LOVE with the speed and the control. Absolutely every little detail you have access to in C. And there is no weird abstracted away bullshit. Oh and pointers are fucking magic once you learn them. I am in love with pointers.

It's biggest downside is it's syntax is a little outdated, and it has some old features that aren't important anymore and are kinda annoying. Like header files, ascii default strings, forced type casting when assigning structs. But those things are pretty minimal and easy to work around.

But I also really love lua. First of all Lua is stupidly easy to learn. The syntax only has, like, 30 reserved keywords. It took me reading a single 20 minute lua crash course to have the language down.

Plus it's fast. Lua is an interpreted scripting language, and it's about as fast as scripting languages can get. It's runtime is only 1.3megs. And with the Lua just-in-time compiler it is extremely fast.

Also it's extraordinarily flexible. In lua can you can be like "huh, I wonder if I can take a table of values, change them to string, concatonate them, then use it as the key to access a seperate table inside of a for loop and re assemble the keys on the other end" and it will just work.

There are a few TINY slightly annoying syntax things (arrays start at 1 instead of 0? And ~= means !=?) but that's it.

And with Love2d and bindings to every game library in existence, Lua is an absolutely wonderful language.

My least favorite language

is probably C++. It's design is fucking terrible, but it's performance is good and it has every feature from every programming language ever created ever so you can pick and choose what you need. But I think it's EXTREMELY easy to write dog shit code with it.

I'd avoid it unless you need it for a job.

And in conclusion...

This is a tag game, so I gotta tag some people! @mockingcode @404icy @moai-statue

[kojinnie]

Something About Pain | Reiner Braun

Pairing: Reiner Braun x Reader (she/her pronoun)

Summary: You ran away from home and your boyfriend Reiner Braun is desperate to bring you home. When the two of you meet, you share a conversation about how pain inflicts the two of you differently.

Tags & Warning: Angst, (eventual) fluff, (mild) hurt/comfort, slow burn, major miscommunication problem, past trauma, abandonment issue, mention of anxiety, Reiner is a grumpy, hurt individual yet delicate inside | SFW

Word Count: 4.5K

A/N: Based on the request by @okubean for Twisted Match-Up! I hope you like it, boo! (More A/N at the end of the fic)

.::My Masterlist::.

Twisted Match-Up (x Reader): Zeke | Hange | Jean 

There was a vivid look of worry on the face of Reiner Braun as he drove through the empty neighborhood streets. His right hand on the steering wheel, the other one tapping anxiously on the phone, dialing the same number over and over again to no avail.

All of his calls had gone straight to your mailbox, and his text messages were no longer delivered. Reiner came to realize that you've blocked him. "Idiot," he muttered to himself, cursing this whole modern affinity to accommodate people running from their problems easier. Reiner thought the feature was the stupidest thing ever created by humankind, he was pissed, but more annoyed. He realized how tired he was, and if he could, he'd rather be in bed right now. Not roaming your friend's neighborhood at ungodly hour.

"Where... the fuck... are you..." he was pissed, evident from the grunt as he tried one final desperate attempt to call you. It went straight to your mailbox. Your cheery voice didn't make him feel any better, if any, Reiner wished he could tell the mailbox-you to shut the hell up.

Reiner finally hit the brake, sighing annoyed. His black SUV stopped underneath the streetlamp, at a random neighborhood he could only vaguely remember. He had been here before, when he picked you up from your bestfriend's house after one of your "night out" with your friends from college, but he could barely remember which one of these identical suburban houses did she live.

He rested his forehead on the steering wheel, racking his brain trying to remember the house number. Is this even the correct cul-de-sac? There are tens others. Who the fuck came up with the concept of suburban housing? Strips and strips of uniformed houses. And even worse, who the fuck thought that it was such a great idea to live in one? Like some Stepford Wives nightmare. Reiner couldn't believe some people would save up money for all their lives to pay off their mortgage to live in complete conformity, like a communist utopia with capitalist credit system. Were these people right in the head or had their brains fucked over by the boring 9 to 5 jobs they've had for decades?

That's beside the point. Reiner sighed. He ranted a lot when frustrated.

He knew you'd be there, in one of these houses, curled up crying in your bestfriend's bed, perhaps pouring your heart out on how much of a bad boyfriend Reiner was. He knew because you've passed the micro-aggression millionth times, muttering under your breath, saying that you'd be fine if Reiner kicks you out because your bestfriend would take you. What kind of fuckery was all that? Why would he ever kick you out? Reiner thought. He was clueless. Why were you so adamant that he would leave you eventually? Reiner could feel his annoyance grew while reminiscing your antics. He began to think, maybe he had never understood you to begin with.

But Reiner was wrong, because he was right about a lot of things about you. You were exactly in your bestfriend's house, curled up in her bed, ranting how hard it was being with Reiner. Although the tears had dried since hours ago. You were in your PJs and drinking the hot coco your friend had made you, comfortable in the bliss of obliviousness upon the fact that your boyfriend of one year was now driving aimlessly trying to locate your position. You were adamant that he was going to leave you anyway, you thought he wouldn't exert an ounce of energy trying to plea you home.

It was 4 AM in the morning and you hadn't come home. The trace of you had gone completely from Reiner's apartment since early morning. Reiner knew that this was bound to happen, had he done anything differently - would you stay? He thought of you and the state that the two of you had been tangled in. All the unresolved tension, or the persistent insinuations coming from you that you always shrugged off in the end, saying "Nothing." as if it did not matter, each time Reiner shot them with, "What did you say?"

You sipped your hot coco and let a troubled whimper as you told your bestfriend what was happening. It's the culmination of small things, your feeling of inadequacy and the anxiety of waking up every morning, being convinced that each day would be the day that Reiner finally leaves you. Every day you’d be mentally preparing yourself for the ultimate fate until Reiner returns home with his big, warm hug until your anxiety caves in. And that the anxiety would appear again in the next morning.

The idea of him leaving became incessant and you could never bug it off. You wondered why, maybe because you believed that you were inherently flawed. Maybe it's the way Reiner made that small "Tsk," when he came home to see the garbage piled up, "Babe, didn't I tell you to put out the garbage?"; or the deep, annoyed and condescending sighs he made when he missed his favorite show because you forgot to pay the cable bills while he was out at the office.

Maybe it's the way you couldn't match his sharp memory and reliability with you constantly forgetting things and your seeming inattentiveness despite the abundant reminders, notes and alarms you've made to keep yourself alerted. At times, your mind just wandered, and you needed him to rope you back in, but he never got the gist.

So, you were adamant that you had grown to be nothing but inconvenience for him, hence when he spent the night over at his office due to what he called "Shit load of work" over the phone, you were certain he wouldn't come back at all. You knew that the pain of being abandoned would haunt you to myriad of miseries, so you'd rather leave first. You knew it would be the end you both needed, because you knew Reiner did not care about you enough to tolerate your shit any longer. He was always quiet, there was hardly ever any expression on his face, God knows what he was thinking underneath. Each of your "Reiner, I'm sorry." would only be met by a singular hum or a quick, "It's okay." that left you wondering, did he ever mean it at all?

So that morning you left. While he was still at the office, because you knew there was no feelings strong enough for Reiner to keep him from leaving you eventually. You left first.

Your bestfriend nodded in reassurance, "You gotta do what you gotta do." she said pulling you into a warmly hug, but your attention was suddenly caught by the pile of plastics and packages from your take-outs at the corner of your friend's room. It just bothered your mind, and you got up to take it out. A small token of atonement to what you wish you had done to Reiner.

Your bestfriend immediately scrambled and took the garbage away from you. Insisting for you to stay in bed and let her take care of it. You nodded and retreated to the pillow fortress. You felt bad for her because the temperature was dropping, and there was no necessity to take the garbage out right now, but your impulse was often hard to subside, and your friend had grown to acknowledge and take sympathy over that. Unlike Reiner, you thought.

Maybe it's because Reiner never shown anyone openly about what he felt, but what you did not know, sometimes he wish he had. Sometimes he wished he'd opened up about how hard it is for him to breathe when unfortunate things occur that he did not have the answer to. Sometime he wished he could share his fear, worry, anger and disappointment, but he was always thought that a man got to suck it up, and perseverance was the only way he knew how to survive.

Sometimes he wished he had told somebody that the constant worrying about his loved ones consumed him too, to the point it became hard for him to let his guard down even when things are okay. He was always on alert, and sometimes it got exhausting too for him. He wished he had told all that, so in times like these he did not have to assume the heartbreak alone while trying to find the solution to it. Sometimes he wished people knew that he cared too, he loved too, he knew too when someone he loved was struggling, but he never learned how to show it. Reiner knew your mind often raced hundreds of miles per hour, Reiner knew your state of agitation, but he never had anyone to teach him how affection should look like, other than be of service, which he tried his best at being. It was no wonder that Reiner was left clueless when you chose to leave without warning.

He was pissed because he knew how daft he was, yet none of it was ever intentional. He cursed himself for not knowing what went wrong, for not being more observant, for not being open with his feelings, for not telling you how much he had grown to love you and how much his apartment immediately grew cold at your absence. But mostly, at this moment, he cursed himself because he wasn't attentive enough to know you friend's house number.

The air was crisp when your bestfriend stepped out of her porch. She made quick steps to the garbage can when she saw bright headlights coming in from the end of the street. She grunted, wondering what was her neighbor doing, cruising around with dramatically low speed. It seemed odd.

She put her fingers above her eyes, trying to recognize the plate number or the driver, but the black SUV lights were dispersing her sight.

She closed the garbage can and tried to immediately return inside but the car cruised closer and pulled over in front of her. The window rolled open.

"Hey," There was an immediate look of surprise from the person that Reiner barely recognized. But he was sure enough that it was her, judging from her body language; all tensed and alerted, "This is Reiner."

For a moment, there was an awkward silence between Reiner and your bestfriend. She was considering carefully on what to say next.

"Uhm yeah, I know." Your bestfriend finally spoke, her voice creaked, caught by surprise. "What do you want?"

Reiner spoke your name, "I want to meet my girlfriend." Reiner could hear the desperation in his own voice, but your friend jeered in response.

"My girlfriend." she passingly mocked the way Reiner spoke, she came to dislike what she thought was possessiveness in Reiner's nature of speaking, "She's not available. I suggest you to scram. Before my neighbors complain."

Reiner furrowed his brows in dismay, couldn't seem to understand the hostility presented by your friend, "I need to talk to her."

She stood unyielding. Reiner opened the door and climbed off of the car, sighing as he walked closer, propelling your friend to keep her distance away even further. "Please, let me talk to her."

"Not a chance." She turned around and scurried back into the house. Reiner was quick to yell, to her expected dismissal. Without thinking further, Reiner got back to behind the wheel and moved his car forward on to the curb, proceeding to close off the exit way for her small city car in the driveway.

Reiner jumped off the car as your besfriend realized what he had done, "I'm not moving the car until she comes down."

She let out a restraint shrieked, "What the fuck?! I got a dentist appointment tomorrow morning!"

"Then please, tell her to come down and talk to me," Reiner said, sounding almost apologetic. He threw a glance at a lonely swing set in the small park across the street, "there."

The occurrence happening before your eyes was unexpected to say the least. You closed the small slit from your bestfriend's window fold, trying to manage your heartbeat that had become almost deafening. At the same time your bestfriend appeared from the door, face red with flustered, "I think he really wants to see you."

Thousands of thoughts made a commotion in your head. It did not make any sense. You made it easier for Reiner by walking away with clean slate, you were sure this was what he had hoped secretly.

Your friend shuffled inside and shot you a deep stare, she sighed heavily and told you that whether you liked it or not, you had to face him. Reiner looked genuinely worried, she said, twisting your guts even further.

You sat in her bed for a moment, trying to relive every waking moment with Reiner. Sure there were moments when your own thoughts chased you into a deep corner and you wished Reiner had seen it. Sometimes you wished he’d hold you tight, kiss you with reassurance and told you how meaningful you were to him. Sure, sometimes being with Reiner could feel lonely, but he had never treated you back nor was he ever intentionally mean to you. What do I want? The question hung heavy in your mind.

I want him to say that he wants me, the voice within the nook of your brain said, I want him to say that he loves me.

You nodded, finally ceasing from running away further.

             Reiner never thought that at his 20-something he would sit miserably on a random swing-set at a random neighborhood just an hour before the dusk cracked. Reiner was a big man, but even with his figure and the aid of his tailored suit and shirt, wrinkled after gruesome hours at work trying to keep his company afloat on the thin ice of his personal relationship with you – Reiner was tired, and miserable, and desperate. Even more, he was cold as the temperature continued to drop down.

He hung his head low, trying to fight the shivers. It was quiet, too quiet, only the faint sound of the wind and the creaking sound of the swing-set holding off to its dear life under Reiner’s massive weight. The man sighed, never he thought that the sight of you coming out of someone’s house in the dead of a  night would be a spectacle he looked forward to the most.

He closed his eyes, shutting himself off from any sound and thought. Thinking that maybe in the bleakness of his sense, the time would pass faster and your heart would soften.

In the nothingness Reiner could feel a sudden warmth crept from the tips of his fingers, he opened his eyes to see you standing before his eyes, towering him who was sitting like a pathetic boy on the swing. You were wrapped in a fluffy bathrobe, hiding your PJs underneath. In your hands were two cups of scalding tea, you shoved one into his hand, “You came.” You stated.

Reiner let out a deep sigh of relief as he saw you safe and sound. He felt warmth travelled across his body, he did not know whether it was the tea in his hand or simply the sight of you that made him felt so. His eyes latched on to you as you sat on the swing next to him, “Hey. What are you doing?” Reiner asked.

“Running away.”

“Why?”

Reiner looked at you intently, and the guilt started to consume you. You gazed afar, softly shook your head, “Dunno.”

“I see.”

Yet another silence ensued.

“How’s work?”

Reiner sighed again; the heavy breath seemed to be the only way the two of you communicated. Just two troubled minds pouring their burden at each other, “Bertholdt abruptly resigned—fuck, it’s been a nightmare, but—” Reiner pressured his thumb over his brows, trying to ease his sharp migraine that suddenly came, “—that doesn’t matter now. Will you come home?”

He looked at you again, you were still gazing to god-knows-what, everything other than his eyes. Reiner grew antsy on his seat, the swing creaked again. Please look at me. Please look at me. The words resonated incessantly in Reiner’s head but nothing came out of his mouth. Just a stoic, to-the-point question.

Don’t you wanna know the problem, Reiner? Is that all? I said I don’t know and you didn’t even try to dig in deeper? You came all the way here and you just straight up asking me to go home with you? Your mind was nowhere better. It’s in uproar but there was only silence coming out of your mouth. But he came, he didn’t leave. Contradiction danced inside your mind like an unwanted guest.

The silence grew heavier. You saw the lights from your bestfriend’s bedroom lit off, she had got to be tired eventually. Suddenly, you felt so alone. Just the two of you in this odd morning.

“It’s hard, right?” Reiner broke the silence, he looked at you again, this time he was desperate for you to look into his eyes. Little did he know, you were refusing to do so because you could feel your fragility forming in your eyes. You swore not to cry.

“What?” Just a depthless answer you uttered.

“Growing up.” Reiner muttered. The man sounded almost contemplative in his defeat. He sighed again and shook his head, “I thought I’d be someone better by this time in my life.”

The answer surprised you. You thought he would say something like ‘Relationship is hard’ or some jargons he picked up from one of the movies he watched without you. You felt bad for undermining him just because you were upset with him. Does it really mirror your true perception of him? Maybe you really hadn’t known him that well.

You had no resolve to his statement, so you just nodded, allowing him to pour out his thoughts.

“I thought I’d be better with my job, with myself, and most importantly,” he shifted to lurch towards you on his seat, the wire strings of the swing twisted to your direction, “with the people I love. But obviously, I still… suck.”

“And here I am. 4 AM. A fucking adult on a fucking neighborhood swing-set.”

You could feel the air suctioned out of your lungs, as you felt guilt loomed bigger inside you. He came and he felt bad – what more could I ask for? But then you remembered the nights of loneliness despite having Reiner sleeping next to you. You had a bad day, but you were too prideful to come clean. You wanted him to be intuitive, but he never did. Being with Reiner, you had mastered the art of crying in silence while sharing the bed with him. It’s exhausting. Yeah, Rei, maybe you’re bad at this.

Despite that, you stayed silent.

“Will you hate me if I say I don’t know what’s wrong?” Reiner knew how daft he sounded, “God. I’m pushing my luck coming clean at you.”

You were at loss for words. You had so many things to say, but too few of a courage.

Reiner called your name. He reached over and tried to tangle one of your fingers with his. From your periphery sight, you could see him forcing a smile, “I—”

He sighed again. Reiner’s chest was filled with words and all he wanted was to vomit it out, but he never knew how to properly addressed the feelings he had—he couldn’t even describe what he felt. All he knew was one thing: he wanted you home, back in his arms, “I am a stupid man. I really don’t know what’s happening between us. You.. just.. gone. Please, just tell me what’s wrong. I’m not smart enough for all these..”

There was almost a childish plea in Reiner’s words, and you couldn’t help but to threw a faint smile. You chuckled, “What did you say? You’re—what?”

He scoffed at himself, “I am stupid.”

You finally caved in because you realized there was an undeniable genuineness in the way he spoke. And the sentiment was mutual, you felt stupid as well for you had not realized how completely, utterly, truly clueless Reiner was.

Eventually, you looked at him. His hardened face quickly turned wary to finally see how puffy your eyes were from crying earlier, you forced a smile, but it was clear you were pretending, “You make me feel so lonely sometimes.”

The words came out of your mouth like a canonball that had been stuck in your chest for too long. You felt relief, but on the other side, Reiner could feel his heart broke. A pain from a man realizing too late of the damage he had caused.

You thought of everything that had made you feel so. The way Reiner rolled over in bed away from you, drowsy and unaware, when you called him in the dead night as your anxiety kicked in; when his hand let you go as you tried to hold his hands in public; the complete non-existing mention of you in his social media; the take-outs that he mindlessly brought home when you had cooked dinner; his easiness in dropping a problem after he said sorry without checking up with you further.

It was the absent of his intuition that made you felt invisible – but you realized too late that maybe he was truly oblivious, evident as he said, “But how?”

“You really don’t know?”

“Babe,” he further tangled your fingers into his grasp. Your hand and his, they hung in the middle of the two swing seats, “I swear on my mother’s grave.”

“I’ve always thought you wanted to leave me but never got the right moment to it. The affection—I hardly ever got it from you. Not the affirming words, not the reassurance. Hell, maybe I want that public kiss and hugs that you thought was stupid, Rei. Just—”

You could feel the tears forming, choking you mercilessly, “—just to feel loved. To feel wanted. For once.”

You finally let your tears dropped. And Reiner was slapped with realities that both of you were in. He let go of your hand and stared down at the pavement, “I’m sorry. I never knew.”

“You never asked.”

“But I never knew. How am I supposed to know that I should ask when I didn’t know I should ask on the first place? I’ve always thought you wanted to be left alone when all your crazy thoughts come in—but you—”

“—you—"

Reiner groaned, obviously frustrated. He rested the blabber, “Maybe we’re just not good at this.”

Like a train, you could feel the ending coming to hit you. This is it. This is it. You thought to yourself, picturing how Reiner would finally leave you. You secretly wished Reiner wouldn’t give in, you wish he’d put up more fight, so at least you’d know that you carried a weight in his heart. But you knew this was bound to happen, so why were you so upset?

“Maybe.” You wiped your tears dry, “That’s okay, Reiner. I know that’s what I am.”

“What?”

“I’m just an embarkation point, right? Everyone will leave me eventually. That’s why I left, because I know eventually, we’ll be talking about this. So I’d better leave first.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” Reiner grew even more frustrated with the way you danced around your words.

“It’s okay if you want to leave me. That’s what all people do to me.”

“You left because you think I was planning to leave you all along?” Reiner asked, sounding painfully offended as he finally got to gather what you were insinuating, “So that is the problem?”

“Yeah, so I better leave first, right? Before I get hurt again? Before you leave me like other people and—”

“Fuck other people!” Reiner raised his voice, which he immediately regretted. He ran his fingers over his hair irritated, turning it into a complete blond mess, “Are you trying to avenge your revenge for other people—those exes you’ve had—on me?”

Tears welled up again in your eyes, as you looked away from him. But he called on your name again, this time there was a deep sternness in his call that you couldn’t help but to face him. Reiner was glad that you finally gained courage to speak the truth, when he had not, “So you want reassurance, yeah? How about the times I told you how beautiful, how smart, how great you are – only for you to tell yourself the opposite immediately.”

Reiner looked directly into your eyes, “I can’t make you something you’re not. What you are is who you think you are.”

“You can never matter – if you don’t think you do.”

An expressionless, soundless tear fell onto your cheek. A heart broke to your dismay. Reiner finally said the truth and there was no way you could delude yourself into thinking that he was wrong, “Then… why don’t you just leave me, Rei? Why don’t you get rid of me a long time ago?”

“Because I’m giving you something that I never received in my entire life, ever. I’m staying for you.” There was a palpable pain in the way Reiner spoke. He landed his finger on to your heart and you could feel it pierced through your skin with heavy realization, “I’m staying. Like no one ever did in my life. Not my ex-girlfriends, not my friends, and certainly not my father. That’s what makes us different. I have more faith in you than you have in me.”

Reiner was a man with heavy heart. He had been through a lot of things in his life, learned how to fend on for himself since very young, and dreamed of the day when he could finally put his hair down with someone he cared for. And what you hadn’t realize, was how essentially similar you were to him. How both of you longed for someone to let go of your inhibitions and fear? Just two broken people finding refuge in each other’s longing for the same thing. And that’s what you failed to see. He understood you, just in a way you didn’t understand.

And that’s the thing about pain, they are inherently personal. No matter how much you have shared yourself to others.

The two of you went dead silent for a moment. In the horizon, the sun rays were starting to emerge, the morning had arrived.  Your tears cascaded painfully slow; Reiner was looking at his feet trying to sip his tea that had gone cold. His hands were trembling with both sadness and anger that were beginning to secede.

Reiner finally called your name, this time it was delicate, “I’m sorry, alright?”

You looked at him with tears in your eyes as you nodded, “Alright.”

“Will you come home, now?”

“Yes,” you muttered, “I think I will.”

The two of you got up and Reiner immediately drew you into his chest, holding you the tightest you had ever been held, reconnecting all the broken pieces scattered inside you. You buried your face into his strong chest as you sobbed once more, while he kissed the top of your head with affection more vivid than thousands of words of affirmations.

“What do we do with these hearts, Rei?” You asked as you felt your chest throbbing with pain and love.

The man loosened his embrace and smiled, “Persevere.”

A/N:

First of all thank you so much to @okubean for giving me a hellish prompt! This one really made me faced my own abandonment issue and poured it into a writing. I tried to touch about the absent-mindedness as the implication of ADHD but I’m really worried that it doesn’t really do it justice. So hereby my sincere apologies! 😭🙏

Nonetheless, I really hope that you may enjoy this piece and I’m so sorry if it comes off as boring!

I literally drafted this on the metro, and got really carried away with it!

Did I enjoy it? (Yes)

Did this turn out longer than I expected? (Yes)

Am I worried this will bore people? (Yes)

[dreaminginvelaris]

sorting acotar characters into hogwarts houses

idk why i decided to make this post but it was fun sooo...

lmk if y'all agree or disagree. Also please no hate, sometimes a post is just for fun and i don't need any negativity. UNLESS its hate for elain which by all means go ahead ;) (because of ppls sensitivity, this joke isnt an invitaion to go on a full blown elain hate rant just offer a few jabs, especially if you agree on the elain section and move on, if you wanna go on a rant, message me or submit a post and i'll response, all the love <3)

Slytherin: Ambition, Cunning, Leadership, and Resourcefulness

Rhysand: of course Rhys is Slytherin, the man screams Slytherin. We all know he's cunning, often coming up with plans to get what he wants, leader well duh, he's a high lord and loves it and is great at it, he's ambitious, he's a dreamer, so of course, he wants more, and he's resourceful, always being able to think on the spot. Rhysands second house would be Ravenclaw for sure though.

Eris: uhhh do I even have to explain? wants to be Highlord, boom ambitious. seems to be the one in charge of his brothers and has many responsibilities, boom leader. being able to achieve what he wants, boom cunning. resourcefulness...yeah I don't got an example for that one, anyways 3/4.

Azriel: daddy az is a Slytherin, I mean obviously this is the best house (is it obvious yet that I'm a Slytherin ;) but fr, I debated sorting him into Ravenclaw, but even though yes he shows Ravenclaw traits it's not the ones we see the most of or the ones that really shine through Azriel's reserved personality. The main traits azzy boo here has from Slytherin are Cunning and Resourcefulness, and imo these are the ones we see from him every page.

Amren: im putting amren here too, she's literally both!

Gryffindor: Brave, Courage, Daring, Chivalrous

Cassian: this one is self-explanatory, how many times has he put others before himself, how many times has he endangered his own life to save others. that's a Gryffindor soul he has. he always tried to do the right thing, he's brave as hell and reckless at times it seems from the little snide comments we've gotten from the books, he would have been a marauder no doubt.

Tamlin: I hate to do this I do because I love my lions, but I had to put this piece of shit somewhere and since he reminds me of peter Pettigrew bc of his cowardness, I'm sorting him in here. I'm so sorry guys ;(

Morrigan: helloooo, the house colors are red and gold??? obviously mor would demand this house, yes demand. but not just that she's crazy brave, at only what 18? i think, she stood up to her family, making a decision she knew could have her ending up in a horrible situation. but she always is brave, shes gotta when her evil family is still in her life.

Hufflepuff: Loyal, Kind, Patient, Hardworking

Gwyn: i choose my girl gwyn for Hufflepuff bc let's face it, she is the embodiment of Hufflepuff. She's loyal to her new friends, emerie and Nesta, and the priestesses. She's kind as we can see when she first met Nesta and when emerie and Nesta shared their stories. She's very patient never snaps at that bitchy priestess who idk the name of as well as patient when it comes to her and Azriel's tender new friendship and hardworking, always doing her job, running around the library, for her work, always researching more ways to help the Valkyries. i debated putting her in Ravenclaw, because of her intelligence, but i think she's a Hufflepuff through and through.

Elain: IT HURTS MY HEART PUTTING PLAIN ELAIN IN THIS HOUSE. but I gotta, the only trait this plant sniffer has out of all the houses is "kind and patient" EVEN THOUGH SHE'S NOT REALLY LMFAO. I've made a post on explaining why this dirt lover isn't as kind as the books make her out to be, and I would argue she isn't actually patient at all, I mean did we miss how she was basically frustrated Nesta wasn't getting better even though it had been like what 2 weeks, LMFAO. but yeah I mean she's not loyal unless you have food and money then oh yeah she'll be loyal and she's not hardworking bc I mean she never did jack shit and still doesn't, sorry to do this to y'all.

Note: some of yall are so soft. this is not an anti elain post. sorry i insulted her but hey its my post, and i have commentary on each character to explain why i feel they belong in a certain house. sorry i happened to insult your fav. but this isnt an anti elain post, just like its not anti tamlin or anti eris. its just a post about all the characters period, which is why i inculded all of them in the tags. hey, i even insulted Nesta a little bit, but I'm not gonna tag anti-Nesta bc it's not a fucking hate post. get off this post if it comes across you and you don't like what I say, it's not hard to literally just scroll, trust me I've done it multiple times especially when it's a hate post on my beloved characters and they didn't use the anti tags. it's not fucking hard, grow up.

Ravenclaw: Wisdom, Wit, Individuality, Intelligence

Feyre: I debated putting queen feyre into Slytherin, I mean she shows the traits for sure, but it's not really if she shows the traits it's what shines the most in her. Ravenclaws are known for their creativity (bae luna Lovegood <3) and feyres an artist, even in her darkest times she remained an artist, always seeing portraits in her mind, always admiring the beautiful colors of the world. We know she's intelligent, picking up reading and writing quickly, and we also see it when she's strategizing, with the inner circle. Feyre is so wise, she had to be, she had to grow up quickly, you often see her in the books giving advice, because even though she's only 21, she's lived a lifetime. and the whole book of acomaf can show you how witty she is, I mean its what made us fall in love with feysand.

Amren: tiny snowball amren is literally a slytherclaw, she has all the traits from both. but because of how well she is with coding languages and how she always reads and does puzzles i think she'd enjoy being a Ravenclaw.

Nesta: I thought about this for a while, really looking into where she would thrive, Ravenclaw is for her no doubt. She's herself, always has been even when that wasn't such a good thing... but she's witty too if you make sure to not count the "the book is about...a book" I'm sorry that line makes me laugh every single time. we haven't really seen much of her intelligence but I'm guessing she is. but really she would love to be in a house where ppl are themselves and read, i can already imagine her creating a book club where people can be themselves and enjoy smutty books like her.

Lucien: originally I was going to sort him into Hufflepuff but then I remembered how intelligent he is, how witty, and I remembered in acowar he talked about how being the youngest of what 7 heirs? he had the chance to really educate himself which he loved to do, to really learn about his court, idk this man just screams intelligence to me.

I left out emerie bc i honestly don't know where to sort her, i feel like i just don't know her too well or understand her enough to sort her, so feel free to lmk where she would belong :)

[ms-demeanor]

It was kind of your side rant in a rant but, is it really not normal in most areas to expect everyone who drives to have at least very basic knowledge of cars? At one point it was nearly a required class in our schools!

Auto shop in my school district got cancelled in 1997, four years before I would have been able to take it. I don’t know what the driver’s ed requirements are like now but I never had to take even a driver’s ed class (I think because I didn’t get my permit until 6 months before I turned 18?). At one point I tried to convince my Girl Scout Troop that we should earn the Car Care Badge but my troop leader was pretty aggressively against it (back in my day the “drive for a greener world” section was “learn how to change your oil” and my troop leader was worried we’d get crushed to death by a car or something).

Beyond that, in spite of living in the strongest car culture in the world, pretty much nobody has ever talked to me about how cars work unless I’ve intentionally sought that information out.

I didn’t know much about working on cars until I started dating my partner, who does all his own car maintenance. Since I started dating my partner and learning how to work on cars I’ve:

replaced my air filter (this is literally the easiest bit of car repair you can do. You’re probably due for it, google “how to change air filter on X type of car”, get a filter from autozone for $17, replace it, and cackle because Jiffy Lube will never again be able to charge you $50 to do it; if you’ve never worked on your car do this now you will feel so powerful and you’ll want to do more)

changed my oil

flushed my transmission

replaced a water pump in a Saturn engine (Saturn engines get bonus difficulty points because they’re so tiny that they’re impossible to work on; part of the reason I’ve done so much repair stuff is because my partner’s hands couldn’t fit in my car’s engine)

replaced a thermostat in a Saturn engine

replaced a bunch of fucking belts (including once with only one wrench and a headlamp in a dark parking lot for a friend)

replaced O2 sensors on three different saturns (delightfully simple; I borrowed a wrench from my dad to replace an O2 sensor once and went outside and came back in five minutes later and he was like “Couldn’t get it done?” and I was like “What? No? I’m putting your wrench back because I’m finished” and he was floored - my dad doesn’t work on cars *at all*)

changed spark plugs

replaced 2 radiators on one miserable 1984 mazda truck

replaced 1 jeep radiator

changed so many headlights

done my brakes a bunch (pads and drums; this shit is so fucking easy please do your own brakes don’t pay the dealership like $600 for $20 in parts and half an hour’s work)

dropped my gas tank to replace the in-tank fuel filter

replaced my valve cover gasket after spending four miserable hours sitting in the engine compartment scraping the old one off

and I’m currently halfway through an ABS deletion on my 1989 XU. (gotta re-run brakelines and it’s annoying and we keep losing track of the double flaring tool)

I am not, by any means, a mechanic but I like working on cars and it’s not as hard as it might seem from the outside.

However I had to go looking for all of that information myself (when we started dating my partner didn’t expect me to work on cars with him, I had to ask him to show me) and anybody else who wants to work on cars has to do the same, at least around here.

Most new vehicles come with a maintenance schedule in the shitty little manual that comes with the car. If you buy new from a dealer they’ll probably have some kind of basic maintenance agreement during the warranty period.

None of that shows you how to jump a car or change your windshield wipers.

Anyway, if you are reading this and you want to learn how to fix your car here are some tips:

Get a real manual for your car. The shitty little twenty page booklet that tells you where the hazards are is good for quick reference but bad for fixing things. Get a Chilton’s Manual. And yeah, I would recommend Chilton’s over Haynes. These are manuals made by independent companies who bought the car in question, stripped it down while documenting it and taking pictures, and put it back together. These are *great.* I give out as gifts.

Go look for a forum on your particular type of car - this works if you’re having in-the-moment problems too. At one point my buddy was going to pick me up but his car wouldn’t re-start; we looked on a forum, discovered it was a fuse problem, found the super secret re-activation button hidden under a panel in the center console, and were able to drive off on our merry way to try to replace the fuse (I bought four sets of fuses before we gave up - turns out it was an accessory fuse for the brake light on the camper shell and also Toyota makes it so that a burned fuse on an accessory can pretty much kill your car, so that’s fun!)

Look for youtube videos of the fix you want to do. They’re not going to be out there for everything, some car communities have more nerds than others (jeeps jeeps jeeps jeeps jeeps jeep nerds are NERDS and there are videos for everything) but you’ll at least be able to find something similar to cross-reference the fix with your Chilton’s Manual.

If you want to learn or read about general repair stuff check out the Wrenching tag on Jalopnik. I find Jalopnik very soothing and read it a lot.

See if your local community college has an Automotive Technology program - there should be introductory courses and advanced courses and it’s a lot of work to take a class like that but it’ll be extremely worth the time and effort.

Ask to help when people you know are working on their cars. Your buddy  probably could use a spare set of hands to do his brakes and you can learn by watching and helping.

[chibioomi]

𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐦𝐞 - 𝐩𝐭 𝟐

￫ 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐦𝐞 ! : prohero!bakugou x prohero!reader

summary: he’s used to grabbing the attention from everyone in the room, mainly due to his loud persona. everyone seems to know who is but her, and that bothers him. he makes it his mission to get her to notice him.

tags: fluff, lil bit of romance, lots of crack

                  ───────────── .°୭̥ ❁ ˎˊ˗

y/n was staring at bakugou in pure confusion. “do you remember me now?” what did he mean by that? was he someone she was supposed to remember? 

blinking at him a few times, your eyebrows furrowed together. you were racking your brain for the many possibilities you would know the strange man that propelled himself into the air to get your attention. was he someone you went on a date with at one point? or someone you had saved? 

“i’m sorry but . . . no, i don’t?” a nervous laugh escaped your lips as you gave him half a smile, rubbing your neck. he held an aura that was so familiar yet so foreign. 

the blonde man just looked blankly at you. you could’ve sworn you saw a look of disappointment on his face, but it disappeared just as quick as it came, if it was even there. it almost made you feel kinda bad for not knowing who he was. almost. 

“well, if you don’t mind, i’m gonna go-” your finger pointed to the sky as you prepared to take off, but the man held his hand out, signaling for you to stop. 

“we went to u.a. together. you were always hanging with todoroki and deku. i don’t really know how you would constantly forget where our class was, but you always did, without fail. one day you asked mina to teach you how to do this crazy stupid dance move and you knocked over two lamps in the dorms with your wings, and aizawa-sensei punished you to a week of cleaning. i’m not sure how, but you were always the only person that never even looked my way. and i thought i liked it at first, but anytime i tried to actually talk to you, your dumbass would act like i was some complete stranger.”

as he listed off a bunch of different random events from your high school years that you vaguely remembered, it creeped you out at first. how did he know all of this about you? 

narrowing your eyes at him, your head tilted to the side. this was what you believed to be your first time actually getting a good look at him. his hair was full and spiked, and it looked like it took him either hours or no time at all to do it. i wonder if it’s softer than it looks . . . his red eyes held a different type of understanding to them. as if he’d went through a lot, even at his young age. which would make sense, if he said he was in the same class as her in high school. 

that’s when it clicked. you were thinking about the few times she hung out with mina and her group of friends. there was always that one angry person at them that was constantly yelling about something, most of it you would usually drown out. you weren’t sure why he was so uptight about everything, and if his throat ever hurt from shouting all of the time. 

but the name wasn’t coming to you. 

“i think- it’s- oh ! bakubro, right ?” what a strange name. 

“huh ?! no !”

“no ?” you weren’t going to continue to guess, not really fond of hearing him shout too much. “look, i’m sorry i forgot you, or whatever. i’ve never really been good at remembering things. i hit my head a lot when i was learning to fly,” raising your index finger, you tapped your temple a few times. “still do, sometimes. buildings have it out for me, i swear ! i don’t even see them half of the time, then bam ! i’ve hit a window !” he didn’t look all that entertained at your explanation, but that’s all you could give him as some sort of explanation. “but um . . . i’m l/n y/n,” you offered your hand out to him. he seemed so keen on grabbing your attention, the least you could do was entertain him for a little. 

“bakugou katsuki.”  the name was so familiar to you. you could clearly hear aizawa-sensai saying it as if you were still in his class. “a lot of people used to call me kacchan.” 

“you’re kacchan ?!” eyes widening, you took a step back from him. midoriya still talked about him whenever you two got together, and even though all of the stories he’d told you about them from their middle school years, you’d expected a different demeanor from bakugou. even from the very limited encounters you could remember. 

he was always so loud, crude, and oh so very  rude. 

but here he was. he had put his life in danger just to get you to remember his name. 

“well, kacchan, i promise i’m not gonna forget you any time soon.” 

                   ───────────── .°୭̥ ❁ ˎˊ˗

four months had passed, and you and bakugou spent almost every weekend together. even during work throughout the week, you’d swoop down to his patrolling area to grab lunch or just walk around with him. you honestly never thought you’d find yourself calling the man you couldn’t remember for the life of you, your best friend. 

bakugou grew fairly comfortable around you. he quickly caught on, noticing that you didn’t like when he yelled, so whenever you were around him, even when he was out with the bakusquad, he’d dial his tone down until he saw that you were no longer flinching at the sound of his voice. you’d later explain that you never really liked when someone would yell at you, or anyone else in that matter. as a kid, when you weren’t aware that your wings took up more space in a room, you would knock down different things at home and at school, which would cause your parents and teachers to yell and scold you. and the protective person in you didn’t want anyone else to feel so belittled. 

he also began to learn the little things about you. he learned what your favorite color was, your go-to meal after rather hard days of patrolling, that the gold on your wings was in fact something you were born with, and how ditzy you really were on a daily basis [ which he found rather adorable, but he wasn’t going to admit outloud ]

and today was one of those days in which you never failed to remind him how much of a clutz you are. 

your landing wasn’t the prettiest one, your heels skidding against the pavement, stopping a few feet in front of bakugou, when you were ideally aiming for just behind him. once your feet were planted on the ground, you turned to face him with a small pout etching the features of your face, your wings drooping low, hinting at the fact that you were upset about something. groaning quietly, walked over to you, his arms crossed over his chest. 

“what happened this time?” he asked, knowing you had some stupid story to explain the look on your face. 

“what do you mean this- yanno what, nevermind. i got this big ass bruise on my forehead because some people don’t take into account the fact that there’s flying heroes !” prodding at the darkened skin, she then winced at the feeling. 

“you ran into another building, didn’t you ?”

“no ! maybe . . . okay, what if i did ? what does the glass gotta be so clear for ?” throwing her hands in the air, her wings lifted also, causing her to get glares from the people passing by that she hit. muttering a few sorries, bakugou started to question how she even became a top hero, and how she even managed to go from five to four in the few months he’d known her. sure, she was popular with the kids, and people found how dumb she was just an act for interviews. if only people really knew . . . 

“you outta be more careful, dumbass.” 

“blah, blah, blah, dumbass this, dumbass that. that’s all that ever comes out of your mouth when i tell you this stuff ! it’s like you don’t care. you’re a sadist, aren’t ya ? you like seeing me in pain, huh ?”

“y/n, please shut up.”

“just admit it !”

“no.”

“oi, you’re no fun.” narrowing your eyes at bakugou, you then crossed your arms over your chest. “grab lunch by yourself.”

“you’re such a big baby,” grabbing your forearm, bakugou started to drag you down the sidewalk, to your dismay, along with all of the bystanders that were hit by your wings. finally tearing your arm away from the pro hero, you started to walk along with him, knowing if you tried to make a break for it, it would cause a scene since he would chase after you. 

once you made it to the ramen shop you both frequented, you took your usual seats at a booth in the far corner. it gave a nice view of the city outside, and it was close enough to one of the exits, so that if something went down, you’d easily be able to exit the restaurant.  

after ordering, you both fell into a silence. usually he’d be ranting on about something his friends did the day prior, or some dumb “extras”, and in return you’d catch him up on the adventures of the dekusquad or whatever interesting thing that happened or what you saw on patrol. and at first, you found it comfortable, until each time you glanced up at him, he’d suddenly redirect his attention somewhere else, and vice versa. 

when did i get so nervous around him ?

“stop staring, you weirdo,” you finally said, and that caused him to laugh. finally, something to break the growing tension. 

“i could say the same to you,” squinting at his statement, you rested your chin in the palm of your hand. 

“what’s on your mind, bakuboo ?”

“how many times have i told you not to call me that ?” instead of answering his question, you shrugged your shoulders. thinking of your question, he had to turn his head to hide the blush that was growing on his cheeks. you. you were on his mind, and have been a lot, lately. ever since you two became closer, you’ve plagued his thoughts and sometimes even dreams. it almost felt like you were taunting him. 

“you know, you sure do talk about that y/n a lot,” kirishima stated one night he, bakugou, denki, and sero were hanging out. y/n had offered to take mina out clubbing so the boys could have some ‘time to themselves’. 

“no i don’t, shut up, shitty hair.” plopping down on the couch of his apartment, he flipped on the movie they’d all picked out. 

“it use to be about how she never notices you, and now it’s all lovey-dovey.” denki added, settling into his spot in front of the couch, popping a few kernels of popcorn into his mouth. the statement earned a hit to the back of head from bakugou. 

“maybe he likes her,” sero made sure he was a good distance from his explosive friend when he added his comment, but it didn’t save him from his glare. 

it wasn’t even a statement bakugou could bring himself to reject. why would he lie about it ? he did like you, and it was an annoying feeling. he wished he didn’t, that would’ve made his life so much easier, especially when he was the one that would go out and help y/n pick out dresses for the different dates she’d go on. none of the men ever [ gladly ] lasted long. they’d make it up to date two before either y/n declined the offer for the next one or they’d do something stupid, and she’d bluntly say you’d never want to see them again [ that she learned from bakugou ] 

kirishima could see the storm swirling inside of his friend’s head, and he leaned over to nudge his side. “why don’t you tell her ? what’s the worse that could happen ?” 

“you’re thinking about me ?” y/n’s eyebrows raised in surprise as you tilted your head to the side. 

“huh ?” furrowing his eyebrows out of confusion, bakugou turned to look at you. 

“i asked what you were thinking about, and you went ‘you’.”

did he really say that out-loud ?

“oh, um, well-”

“well, i was thinking about you, too, bakuboo.” you interrupted with a grin, reaching both of your hands out to grab one of his. “i know this is gonna be corny and you better not make a  big deal out of this, and you know, if you don’t feel the same way, we’ll just act like it never happened. but i do like you a lot, katsuki. a lot more than, yanno, just being friends.”

at first, bakugou didn’t know what to say. he wasn’t expecting a confession, honestly. he’d always thought he’d be the first one to say something. but it makes sense, with how fast your thoughts come, and how scattered they are. the cold wind hitting his hand from where yours were previously grabbing his pulled him out of his thoughts. your sudden burst of confidence had evidently died away, the way your wings folded around yourself, something he realized you did when you were nervous, embarrassed, or felt unsafe or uncomfortable. he assumed you were a bundle of nerves at this point, with his prolonged silence. 

“i like you, too, dumbass.” he finally replied, reaching back out to take your hand. 

“really ?” his words pulled your attention away from the edge of a napkin you were picking at. 

“i wouldn’t have said it if i didn’t mean it.”

“you say a lot of things you don’t mean !”

“no i don’t.”

“yes you do ! like when you said that you hated deku.” bakugou snorted, taking a sip from his water.

“i do hate deku.”

“nah, i think you’re in love with him. always picking fights and whatnot. you just want his attention.”

“i’ll start picking fights with you more often, then.”

“. . . no thank you.” 

A/N: i’m supposed to be doing my assignments for business but :D i got bored and this was calling to me. i wasn’t gonna post until tomorrow but i’m kinda excited, imma start on my todoroki fic soon and work on a bunch of haikyuu headcanons. anyways, i hope you guys liked this one, i might make it a mini series just because i really like the idea of bakugou with someone a little ditzy and i have no idea why

[moonflower-31]

I Won’t Forget You - Spencer Reid x Reader

Masterlist 

Part 4  

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Reader 

Warnings: Gun violence, child death, suicide, suffocation, cliffhanger

Tags: @dra-reid, @eevee0722, @ceeellewrites, @anotherr-fine-mess 

~~~~~~~~~ 

"Are you sure about this, (L/N)?" 

"Positive. It's all in the details. We needed to narrow down the suspects, and considering how this woman didn't just shoot these men, and the drugs aren't cheap, I had to make the connection." You insist, placing the map in front of Hotch and putting a finger on the highlighted neighborhood. Garcia had printed it out for you quickly so you could show Hotch and hopefully catch this bitch. 

"It matches the profile in that our unsub is still a medical worker, just in a place where schooling isn't required. Such as a long-term care facility or an urgent care." Spencer cut in, backing up your statement. 

Hotch sighed and looked from you to Spencer. "Alright, have Garcia run the profile by the urgent care near the neighborhood. See if it matches any of their employees. If we get any matches, we'll send out a few people to scout her house." He says, turning around and leaving the room as soon as he had walked in. 

Pretty soon afterwards, you were alone with Spencer again. Not that you didn't  to be.  

"That was good work." He spoke up, gathering the map and papers up from the table. "You wanna call Garcia or should I?" He adds after a moment. 

You keep your head down, afraid that if you look him in the eye he'd be able to see all of the covert thoughts you had about him. Even through the seriousness of this case, your mind wandered back to what had occured just days before. You were still unsure as to what he had meant by any of it. No matter how hard you tried to play it off as just an accidental touch, your heart wouldn't let you. 

You nervously pull a strand of loose hair behind your ear and chuckle to distract Spencer from your lack of looking him in the eye. "I-I can do it. Thanks for the coffee, by the way."

You might've been looking down, but you still caught the wide smile that Spencer flashed towards you. "Of course. You'll sleep when we get home though." He insists, playfully pointing at you. 

"I dunno, I might just live off coffee like my favorite Doctor." You tease, picking up your now cold coffee cup and taking a sip. 

You heard a few footsteps, but no reply. Which confused you. Until you turned your head and finally met Spencer’s eyes that stared intently into yours. 

"Oh, so I'm your favorite now? If I'm your favorite, you should listen to me." He says softly, standing so closely to you and giving you the most intense look with his brown, hazel eyes. You couldn't look into them, no matter how much you wanted to. 

It took you longer than expected to finally respond, but when you did you felt like a flopping fish out of water. "B-but w-what if I don't want to? What if… I prefer coffee to sleep?" He had you in his hands almost like putty. And you knew he could mold you any way he wanted. You just hoped he didn't know that. 

"You sure about that? Did you know that if a strong enough emotion is felt, your voice betrays you if you try to deny it?" You can feel your inner resolve crumbling. And he wasn't even doing anything! He was probably just trying to get you to take care of yourself. Which you should. But you just had to be a brat about it. "It's actually really interesting, we usually go for the facial expression one gives off, but most people can learn to fake an emotion through their face. But the voice…"

You can feel your heart pounding in your chest by now. You could feel his breathing against your neck. He was so damn close! And you had nowhere to run because of his damn legs. He'd catch you in an instant. You gulped and looked him back in the eyes. What were you doing? 

"The voice can't really be trained to not give away how a person feels. Especially when it's strong enough. Now tell me, when did you get the confidence in the last three minutes and 43 seconds to look me in the eye again?" He finally backed away, raising an eyebrow at you as you finally straightened your posture and tried to compose yourself. 

You stayed quiet however, unsure of whatever could be appropriate to respond with to that tone of voice. What was he doing? You wanted so bad to lean forward, take his soft, thick lips in yours and push him against the stale countertops inside the police station. 

"I-I… I gotta c-call Garcia. I'll let you know if we get any matches." You almost feel like kicking yourself as you back away from him and practically flee the room. This was getting to be too much. Were you reading too much into your and his interactions? Or was this really something that he wanted to try? 

You couldn't trust your own feelings anymore. So you did the next best thing: you called Garcia. You hoped that maybe you could chat a little more after you gave Garcia the addresses and the urgent care to go through. You had to talk to somebody and she was the only person that you had gotten the feeling that she wouldn't tease you for how you felt. 

"Hello my lovely! Decided to call me finally? What can I do for you my fine furry friend?" Garcia asks cheerfully. You couldn't help but smile at how happily she greeted you. And she had only just met you. 

"Yeah, sorry Penelope

Everyone else has been calling you for me. So now it's my turn." You tease. "Anyway, I thought maybe we were looking at the income of our unsub the wrong way." 

"Ooh, thinking outside the box, I likey. Whatcha got, Darling?" 

"The neighborhood I had you highlight, I want you to cross reference the residents with the people who work at the urgent care nearby. If any fit, run the profile by their employer. I think we may be able to catch this woman after all." 

"Oh I love the way you think. I'll get on that at godspeed my queen. Garcia out-" 

"Wait-!" You interject, sighing gently. 

"Oh? Can I help you with something else, your gorgeous highness?" Garcia asked, and you could hear the eyebrow wiggle. Guess that's what you got from hanging out with Gabriel too much. 

"Okay, uh, I gotta tell somebody about this before my mouth explodes all my secrets. You think you can keep it?" You ask nervously. You wanted to trust this woman so badly. You needed a girlfriend who didn't put you down for dating any guys. Or liking any for that matter, like Iris.

"Oh, some gossip! I will keep my lips sealed with superglue my lovely! Now tell me all the juicy details!" 

You giggle and look around, being sure no one but Garcia could hear you. "Okay… I don't know what the hell is going on with Reid but… I kinda like him. He's cute, I'll admit it. I used to do some hacking and I found pictures of him. He was my celebrity crush. But make it FBI." You ranted. "And now I'm getting mixed signals from him. Like just a couple days ago, his hand like--brushed against my hip as I went to try and help him with the geographical profile, and he was so damn close!" You hiss into the phone. "A-and today? He got super close again. And he practically had me trapped. But other than that, I don't get any other signs that maybe he might like me. Even if he's just attracted to me. So you can understand my dilemma." You sigh, leaning against the wall. 

Garcia was quiet for a few moments, making you worried that she was going to judge you or put you down for being so stupid. Then you had to pull the phone away from your ear for a few seconds as Garcia squealed. 

"Oh my god I knew it! You two totally hit it off when you came in here for your first day!  I knew there was something there! It's totally okay to feel like that. I don't know what you see in that boy, but go after him like the queen you are." She insists. 

"Heh, I dunno if I'll do anything yet. I want to see if things go anywhere first. Even if he just wants to be friends. I just want to be sure I'm not adding another embarrassing memory that I will never forget. But thanks Garcia."

"Of course my sweetness. That's what I'm here for. Other than being the techie for the FBI." She says sweetly. 

"I gotta go, let me know if there are any matches." You finally lead off. 

"Of course! Wait, hold on," 

"What is it?" 

"You'd think the search would massively decrease the amount of suspects, right? Well all of the suspect-women in this neighborhood, are working at this urgent care. It's like single mom central." Garcia answered, typing away on her computer. 

"That's alright, thanks Garcia. Run that by the employer with the new list of names anyway, see if he'll give any of them up." You say. 

"Will do. Talk soon!" 

You can't help but smile to yourself as she hangs up. She really was untameable. Not that you would want to. 

You turn your head and begin to head down the station hallway as you see Reid race out of the room with the evidence. 

"He-hey! What's going on?" You ask in a mild panic. 

"We have a witness, the unsub tried to kill again." 

○●♡●○

"Any information at all would help, Mr.Greeley." You assure, sitting in front of the man in the chair with his head laid against the table. 

"I want my wife. I want my son." He says in a hiccuped tone. 

"I know, sir. But if you can give us any distinguishing features it can help us narrow down our suspects to find her." You assure again, laying a gentle hand on his. 

"Are they on their way?" He asks, looking at you with sore, red eyes. 

"Yes sir. We've called some of the nearby officers to come bring them. Alright?"

The door to the room opens and you both look up, seeing Prentiss join the two of you. "Everything okay?" She asks. 

"Yeah, he's just shaken up. Who wouldn't be?" You say, sighing. "Darren, would you be up to having a sketch artist come in here? If you don't feel up to sharing what she looked like that's fine." You turn and ask the newest almost-victim. 

"No it… I can give you a few things. She… she had dirty blond hair. It was… messy. Her skin was pale, her fingers were calloused. A-and… her eyes were brown. Oh god her eyes…" he whispered, running a hand through his hair. 

"I'm deeply sorry this happened to you. This information will greatly help the investigation. We will find this woman. Do you still feel okay with the sketch artist coming in?" Emily asked, gesturing towards the door. Silently, the man nodded. You stood up and nodded to Emily, leaving the room to bring the news to everyone else. 

"Did he see her?" Morgan asks, walking up to you from the semi-circle the team had formed near the room you had been talking with the victim. 

"Yeah. Got a good look at her too. Apparently she missed his blood entirely and poured the drugs onto her shirt instead of injecting him with it. So when she pushed him to the ground he got to see her eyes. Garcia's working on faxing us the photos now, see if the sketch will match anything." You nod to him, noticing the fax machine beginning to run. 

Once the photos were faxed, you carried them over to the desk Reid was currently leaning against. You dropped them onto the surface and sighed. "About 23 women, and one description that is super common. How fast do you think we'll get stuck?" You ask him, giving Spencer a teasing look. 

"I doubt we will. Once we narrow these women down to what he saw, we can show them in a line-up fashion. See which one sparks a memory." Reid assures, looking down at the photos and closing the file in his hands. 

"I cannot imagine being this woman and thinking that I should kill these men because they just became fathers. I mean, I can understand her not wanting other women to have to deal with becoming single mothers because their partners decide to skedaddle. But still, give him a chance first." You rant, beginning to sort through the photos by whether or not the suspects fit the description. 

"True. However in her state of mind she probably views all men the same. That they'll all eventually leave her. Maybe her father left too." Spencer suggests, taking a few photos and sorting them with you once he noticed the pattern. 

"That could be true. But I guess we won't know until we get a match-" you sigh. 

Emily hurried out of the interview room and carried a sketch pad with her. "Here," she says, placing the drawing paper in front of you. "Do any of the suspects look like her?" 

You push the unlikely suspects pile of photos away, about to find Emily her answer, when Spencer spoke up for you. 

"Yes, she was one of the first women you sorted." He says, flipping through the pile faster than you ever could and pulling out a photo. "Here, this is her." He says. 

"Let's get this photo back to Garcia, see if she can get us a name." You cut in, standing up and picking up the forgotten pictures. Emily nods to you and heads off to fax the photo back to Garcia. 

○●♡●○

"What do you got, baby girl?" 

"We got a name, Kathy Burgess. She's a single mother, recently gave birth to her son Jason about 7 months ago and--oh my god…" Garcia trails. 

"What is it Garcia?" You ask, hurrying your feet towards the SUV's. She hadn't given you all an address yet, but it wasn't too late not to get ready to head out. 

"Her husband was killed in Afghanistan 3 months ago after being deployed the week before her son was born. He had left them for another woman, who ended up getting pregnant." Garcia answered. 

"Do you have an address Garcia?" Hotch asked. 

"Y-yes, 176 Washington Blvd." 

"Let's go." Hotch announces, pulling out his radio and letting the rest of the team and police know. 

○●♡●○ 

You pulled into the road followed by a SWAT van, unknowing what was going to meet you behind this woman's door. You all piled out of the SUV's and headed towards the building. 

"Is she here? Do we know for sure?" You ask, unholstering your gun and making sure it was loaded. 

"She has to be. She has nowhere else to hide. Neighbors reported her coming home about 30 minutes ago." Hotch answered, beginning to fasten on his bullet proof vest. "I need Morgan and Reid to head in first, try and see if you can get the child out first." 

"Wait, Hotch," you begin. 

"What is it?" 

"Kathy has been killing men because she doesn't trust them. So I don't think she's going to listen to Morgan or Reid. Why don't I go in? Try to negotiate with her. It'll get us more time to find a clear shot of her if she decides to retaliate." You reason. 

"I don't know (L/N). You haven't gotten much experience with negotiating yet." 

"Which is why I should start now. I… I may not know what it's like to have a child and then have the father walk away on me, but I know what it's like to feel abandoned and unwanted." You plead. Reid looks at Hotch hesitantly, turning his attention to you after a moment. 

"She is right, Hotch. She's not gonna get any experience unless we let her." Morgan encourages. 

"Alright. Keep her occupied. Try to negotiate with her. After five minutes, we'll head in after you." 

You nod to Hotch and immediately grab a bullet proof vest, fastening it around your button down shirt you had packed and worn today. It was getting later and later, the sun was about a half hour from setting. You didn't have much time to get her out of there before light was a problem. 

You then headed into the building, easing the burgundy wooden door open as you stalked inside. You aimed your pistol in each direction you looked. This building was a two story. You didn't know the layout, so you had to make it up as you went. 

Once the lower level was cleared, you headed up the stairs, pushing open the door to the master bedroom and the bathroom before you found yourself in front of the only other room upstairs. You sighed and eased the door open. 

Immediately Kathy turned around, clutching a bundle of blankets to her chest while clutching a gun in her other hand. "Don't get any fucking closer! I-i'll shoot him!" She threatened, aiming her gun at the small child in her hands. 

"Ma'am, put the gun down, I just want to talk." You say, holding your hands up. "I'm just going to put my gun away, alright?" You cautiously alert her, putting the gun into your holster again. Pretty soon the gun in Kathy's hand gets trained on you. 

"Leave us alone-I just wanted to save other women from this fate-!" Kathy says shakily, the gun in her hand wavering it's aim. 

"I know, Kathy. What your husband did to you was unfair. But what you did to those women and their husbands is worse. Those men didn't want to leave their children." 

"They would've! All men do it! Harris did! My father! My brother! Every man I've ever known has walked out on me! How would I have known that they wouldn't walk out on them too?!" Kathy screeches, tears building up in her eyes. 

"Kathy, there are plenty of men in the world who would never walk out on a partner or their baby. You can't stereotype them all to be the same. Put the gun down, and I'll get you and your son some help." You assure, taking a step forward. You heard the stairs creaking behind you. You were too late. 

"Who is that?!" Kathy asks, waving the gun towards you more threateningly. 

"Don't worry about them, just focus on me." 

"No! They're all men! All men lie! All men leave! My son's left me too!" She wailed, clutching at the baby in her arms. 

You widen your eyes at her confession, becoming too stunned to listen for Hotch. "Kathy… what did you do?" You ask.

"Kathy Burgess, put the gun down and come with us quietly. We don't want any harm." Hotch called to her. You widen your eyes farther. You had her so close why did they have to come in now- 

"No! All you men do is lie! Lie lie lie!" Kathy ranted, hitting the barrel of the gun against her head. "But I won't let you win again." She says darkly. You begin to jump into action, but it was too late. 

As soon as you took another step, Kathy trained the gun onto herself and shot through her chin, splattering blood against the wall. You race over and catch her falling child before it can hit the ground, slamming your own chest in the process. 

You stand up, holding the child, but feel an absence of warmth. You furrow your brow, a pit of worry in your chest beginning to grow heavier as each of the signs come together. 

You feel a crack form in your heart as you clutch the tiny, blue-faced child in your arms. Tears form in the corners of your eyes. If only you had gotten here sooner. The body was still a bit warm. Meaning she had suffocated him recently. If only you had reached her and convinced her to put him down. 

"(L/N), (L/N) is something wrong with-" you hear Reid begin, causing the hurt in your chest to magnify. You feel your lip tremble as you push past the genius and carry the child down the stairs, never letting go of his tiny body. 

Reid must've taken the hint, as you heard him tell Hotch as you took the stairs to the bottom floor. You had seen your brother in this child. His little curly tuff of hair was something you had only seen in your younger brother. This was too personal. It was like holding a dead version of him in your arms. 

You carried the child out of the house, closing your eyes tightly as the paramedics, who had been called, tried to approach you and take the child. 

"Ma'am, ma'am we have to take him-" the paramedic began to explain, depleting the amount of control you cared to have over your response in an instant. 

"There's no point, she suffocated him at least 5 minutes before I got to her." You answered, snapping just a tad. 

The woman in front of you sighed, directing the rest of her team to head inside. "Ma'am, I'll take it from here." She says, gesturing for you to give her the child. If you were in your normal state of mind, you'd do it no questions asked. But this was different. You held the body even closer to your chest, trying not to cry in front of this woman. 

"(L/N)..." it was Reid. How the hell was he upstairs and then back down to deal with your bullshit? The person you expected to come check on you had been Prentiss. Or JJ of all people. At the sound of Reid's voice, your resolve completely crumbled, and you handed the child to the paramedic. 

"Based on the warmth of the skin and the blueness of the face, he died at least ten minutes before we got here." Spencer started, looking at the back of your head. It was the only way he knew to comfort you in the moment: statistics. 

But that didn't matter to you. 

Spencer sighed, looking at you with sympathy in his eyes. "You… you can cry you know. No one is going to judge you for it." 

That's what broke the dam. You sniffled and turned your body towards his, hugging him tightly almost immediately. You could feel his body stiffen for a moment, almost making you pull back. But then he eased up and laid a hand on your back and one on your head, hoping to comfort you by holding you. He had read that was supposed to be helpful. 

You couldn't help but cry, holding onto him like this. How could your first case go so badly?

○●♡●○ 

By the time you all had arrived home, you were drained of almost everything. You all piled into the bullpen, the eyes of everyone in the room turning to you as they noticed the tired eyes with the darker bags that you wore. 

You sighed and took off your holster, storing it in one of the open drawers of your given desk. You run a tired hand through your hair, looking up at the rest of the team who were equally as tired and bummed out as you were. It was 8 in the morning after all. There had been a delay in getting in the air that had lasted a few hours, making you all late. 

"(L/N), my office, please." Hotch called as soon as everyone was all through and settled into their desks. You exhale tiredly and place your bag down on the desk chair before heading towards Hotch's office.  

You stepped in and closed the glass door behind you. You stood in front of Hotch's desk, nodding to him. "You… wanted to see me sir?" You asked. 

"Yes, (Y/N). Yesterday, you did well on your negotiation. After some reevaluation of the situation I believe you could have gotten Kathy out on your own." Hotch informed, going over the papers. It felt weird for someone to call you by your first name after everyone on the team had been calling you by your last name for the entire case. 

"Thank you, sir." You reply. 

"However, I think the last part of the case got a little too personal for you. I have not looked in your file, but I assume this has something to do with something in that file."

"Actually… Hotch…" you sigh. "I… I saw my brother in that baby. I raised my brother for most of my childhood. And for me to have not reached him in time…" you take a deep breath, avoiding the increasingly obvious sob that wanted to escape your throat. "It was just sensitive for me, sir. I promise, it won't happen again." 

"Since this is your first case, I'll give you a pass. But try to stay focused on the case and not on family matters. Understood?" Hotch clarifies, looking you in the eyes. You can see he's only saying this because he has to. He's flashing you a look of empathy, one you'd been given plenty of times, but never by a man in his authority. 

"Y-yes sir." You reply, the tremor in your voice barely noticeable. 

"Good. Now I expect to see you tomorrow. Go home and try to catch up on some sleep." He dismisses. You nod to him, and shortly thereafter leave his office. 

"Hey." 

You turn your head, brown eyes meeting yours. "Huh? Oh… hey." You reply back, swallowing a sigh as you turn to talk to the genius. 

"Is… uh… is everything alright with Hotch?" He asked. 

"Yeah, he just wanted to let me know how I did and what I could improve on. Nothing much." You reply, forcing your face to stiffen and wipe away the beginnings of tears. But then you remembered what Spencer had said about the voice often betraying the user when the emotion that is felt is strong enough. 

"...Are you alright?" 

You wanted to curse out your own heart for beginning to flutter. Now was not the time to be falling in love with the sexy doctor next to you. 

"I… I think i'll be okay." You say semi-honestly, squeezing your eyes tight. 

"Did you know that it's been proven that talking about one's problems can lead to catharsis, which is a feeling of calmness and relief. Of course… The pain is still there.  But afterwards we have less built up feelings and the hurt hurts just a little less." He informed, putting one hand in his pocket and one on his messenger bag strap. You feel the beginnings of a smile form on your lips, making a small bit of the heaviness in your chest ease up. 

"Is this your formal way of asking me for that coffee?" You tease gently. Spencer chuckled. 

"Maybe…" 

"Consider it a date then." You tease again, a small smile staying on your face. You look up at Spencer, not finding any indication that the idea of it being a date turned him off from the idea. "You wanna get out of here?" 

"Sure. My car or yours?" He asks. 

"Why not walk? Less pollution, and we can talk on the way." You insist. 

"Considering the environment before our own needs. I didn't think that many people were like that anymore." He says, walking with you towards the elevator. 

You giggle softly and press the down arrow. "Guess I'm not like most people." And you could almost swear you heard him reply with a soft 'No you're not.' 

You both step into the elevator once the doors open, letting the doors close after you. Sure, you had left your bag inside, but you wouldn't need it till tomorrow. You had a date with your bed after you hung out with Spencer.  

You both walked towards the exit once the elevator doors opened again, revealing to you the main lobby. 

"So when are you going to reveal to me your favorite coffee order? Or are you going to keep that a secret too?" Spencer teased, walking beside you. 

"Oh come on. I told you all I'd tell you my name soon. I just want to make sure this is where I wanna stay, that's all-" you begin, rolling your eyes with a growing smile on your face that soon plummeted when you saw who was in front of you.  

"(Y/N) (M/N) Grant!" 

Both you and Spencer jumped at the sudden sound, and you turned your head at the sound of your full name. You feel fear invade your heart as you recognize the woman who stood in front of you with shoulder pads and make-up that screamed 'I will squash you like a bug'

"Mother?"

[sonders-bookshelf]

BNHA Spring Break day 9- Free space

So I don't have a fic planned for today but I was asked for some nuance on my last fic which, as stated I the tags, was a Vigilante fic in disguise (I have a habit of writing fics in the middle of the plot) so anyways here it is!

So Disclaimer! I haven't read the manga so I'm just picking up the Vibes™ from vague spoilers but also Canon is Dead so I'm not too hard pressed. (Also spoiler warning for uh. Aizawa and Yamada's past idk)

Okay so the story starts like this: They're in their second year, everyone's established in the hero course, Iida Tensei, Nemuri, Oboro, Yamada, and Aizawa are close friends.

Oboro dies, and it causes a big scare around the school, and Aizawas parents are planning on pulling him out of U.A altogether. It takes a lot for Aizawa to even convince them to put him in the general education courses, so hero course it out.

He's devestated, naturally. His friend died and his dream was crushed within less than a week of each other.

His friends are still keeping in touch, and they still eat and study together (Aizawa is the only one who understands how math works, and Yamada still has to help with their english homework,) but it's difficult for him spending time with them, listening to them have conversations about their hero classes and upcoming license exams (Yamada insists on sparring with him still, with the exuse that "you're the only one who's interesting to spar with!")

It helps him too, bc he manages to keep the physique of a hero, even if he's just in Gen Ed. (Mic asks for help in his Heroics Laws class, and Aizawa indulges him, even if he knows he doesn't need help. Mic was always one to know the rules, even if it was only to bend them.)

(He always seemed to be fascinated with Vigilante's, and it was his passion for them that put the idea in Aizawa's head In the first place.)

He doesn't act on it much at first, he spends time with Hizashi listening to his daily rants about what's going on in class and how he keeps accidentally breaking things without Aizawa there and "honestly I'm thinking about getting a support piece so I don't have to worry about accidentally hurting others when I get too excited."

He and Nemuri spar without her quirk, and him and Tensei take time to mock up support items for fictional quirks (Tensei might've always wanted to be a hero, but he learned a bunch about engineering as a kid, and it was a fun way to distract them both from day to day life.)

Hizashi did put in a request for some kind of voice suppression device, and after a day or two they gave him a mockup to see if it would be comfortable.

"It's only one of those weird voice modulators right now, so it's not functional as a support piece. Turns out it's difficult trying to suppress a quirk advanced voice! Anyways I can do funky stuff like this!" His voice modulator had three settings: Normal, autotuned, and deep voiced. It was a simple mask, made to amplify the altered voice.

"I'm not sure I like it, to be honest. But until I can control my voice this is what I gotta do, right? Here, take a look! I know you and Tensei like to design support items. This ones kinda uncomfortable anyway." He set it on the desk in front of them, before turning to dig through his bag. They carried on through their study session, and after Hizashi left, Aizawa noticed he left his modulator. He didn't quite know why, but he kept it.

[stellocchia]

Rant and cursing :)

I picked the worst week to join twitter

For fucks sake i just want to look at art and tommyinnit takes from the first 5-ish people I found minus those who I read their tumblrs

(Flypaw for example)

But nooo twitter has to be a cess pool that I was just in the process of using because I have never used it.

This is why I only post on tumblr and look at art on instagram

You would think people would have a fucking brain. Telling a 17 year old to die from covid when while popular is a fucking teen. I am 1 month older than him for gods sake

Months ago i saw a mcyt hater saying the same shit.

Do people know how they sound???

Like bitch if someone told them to die they would fucking complain

Bullshit!! You are doing this to a human being.

Every cc is a fucking human that everybody who is saying shit like that is just not seeing thrm as people

Twitter just needs to fucking think before tweeting.

That is like shit who learn in school

"Think before you speak"

"If you dont have anything nice to say then dont say anything at all"

Just idk this makes me so angry? Idk it is something mixed with that.

Some of them are younger than me which isnt a pass but hope they can learn

But

To those older than me I think are so fycking stupid. You think they would know beter

Ugh

I am ending this here or I would just keep repeating the same shit over and over

...

Hope you have a great day :/

(I will say I wouldnt have seen these if people on the tommyinnit tag wouldnt have posted screenshots of it. As I just got twitter I only checked this morning. I did see the tadca shit tho which :/ sucks ass)

💙💙💙

Yeah... I got Twitter back recently and man. There's just SO MANY that think that it's somehow appropriate to wish death on a 17-year-old? For any reason??? Fuck that.

It's especially weird because he wasn't actually breaking any covid regulation from the UK. We have similar rules here (no need for a mask in public, vaccines are not readily accessible for young people, like, I'm in my twenties and only got my first shot 2 days ago and such) and people are out all the time! Like, I've just come back from vacation. Sure, we were careful, but life gotta go on. The economy needs people to move to recover from the crisis. And, hate o say this, but economical crises also kill people.

Does that mean that he was perfectly responsible and all? No. But also his behaviour is far from unique to him and doesn't make him deserving of Twitter's behaviour.

Also shaming someone for getting sick is very shitty. Just saying...

Then, of course, there is the problem with Vidcon. I'm hoping they either shut down that sh*t or that they'll make vaccine mandatory for attendance and tighten covid restrictions as much as possible because otherwise, that's gonna be a super spreader if we've ever seen one. Does that mean that the people saying Tommy should die for talking about going so much are in the right though? No. Fuck them. You can talk about it being a dumb move without being assholes. Also saying he deserved covid for it instead doesn't make you any better. Literally, some people should just shut the f*ck up and think before typing.

[thedramaclubs]

Changing lives (reprise)

Summery: Roman and Remus get the rest of the reviews and it was horrible that it closed their show. They soon meet one of their old friends and Remus’s husband meets them and soon they find something on Twitter to change their lives

Ships: Logicality, Prinxiety, demus/dukeceit

When their singing

Remus-green

Roman-red

Janus-orange

C!thomas-pink

All-purple

“The rest of the reviews are in! New York post, associated press, New York times” exclaimed Joan with ther phone in the air everyone started to get excited and looked on their phones as Roman and Remus are about to listen to how great their musical is........or so they thought.

Everyone’s faces changed to a sad and disappointed look and started leaving

“What? What’s happening?” said Roman as he watch everyone look at him and his brother in sadness.

“This is not a review anyone wants when you have shitty advance sales. This is gonna close us” said Joan

Roman gasp and Remus was shocked “What didn’t they like was it the hip hop?”

“Yeah but not that”

“For gods sake sakes Joan read it.” The twins sat down as Joan read the horrible reviews.

“Ok here’s the highlights, “Remus Allen’s FDR might just be the most insulting misguided, offensive, and laughable performance that this reviewer has ever had the squirming misfortune to endure. Emphasis on the insulting because he try to make him self look like that he was trying to give me intrusive thoughts about FDR.”

“That’s how I normally look what the hell?!?!”

“I mean it’s not so bad” said Roman as he played with his dress

“DO HIM ALREADY!!” “What I’m just saying.”

“Watching Romans Eleanor Roosevelt, corking out a heavy-handed message of activism, is like paying an aging drag queen to shove a syurp-soaked American flag down my throat. And also Eleanor should have been played by a women”

Roman was on the verge of tears “Thats not criticism that’s a personal attack.” His voice cracked and Remus hugged him as he shed a tear

“If your considering buying a ticket to the show do yourself a favor. By a few feet of good heavy rope instead and then go hang yourself”

“Holy fuck, oh god, poopy. Was the show that bad?”

“It’s not the show it’s you two. Your just not likeable.”

“What?” They said simultaneously

“Nobody likes a narcissist.” They sat in silence over what they just heard. “Leave it to me I’ll go and try to change the narrative once again” Joan then left the twins alone in the bullding

“I hate this world” “this just hurts my heart, Where did everybody go?”

They talked over each other as the walk to the bar to find a man in a pink suit. “What can I get ya?” said the man “Yola mezcal blackberry smash” said the twins at the same time. “My condolences Roman. But remember you do have friends” said the man making their drinks.”

“Thank you. Who are you?”

“Thomas Sanders.......we’ve done five shows together.”

“Ugh Thomas went to Juilliard and won’t shut up about.” Whispered Remus as he told Roman “Oh right Thomas. Thomas haha....... why are you dressed like waiter?” I’m in between gigs at the moment. Honestly Roman I feel adrift as i did in my days before Juilliard” Remus proceed to chug a drink that was on the table as Thomas continued to talk about Juilliard and the two were just over it.

“Still I have played hamlet and I’m still known as that guy from the beloved early aughts sitcom “Talk to the hand” I question everything about my existence” As he continues to rant about the past what they didn’t notice as a man in a golden sequiny dress with a black hat and a yellow ribbon tied on it with long golden brown hair walking their way

“Hey guys!”

Roman and Remus turned around to see Janus Allen, Remus’s husband

“Jannie!!!” Remus picked up Janus and spun him around and soon dipped him into a kiss which turn into a make out session. “Ahem I know you two lovebirds haven’t seen each other all day but can it wait we’re still here ya know.” They both looked at Roman and giggle a little from embarrassment “Sorry your show closed on opening night again. Welcome to the world of the unemployed,hit me up next.”

“I thought you were in Chicago?” asked Remus “I totally didn’t quit just now 20 years in the chorus and still wouldn’t let me play Roxie Hart and now their letting Tina Louise play her” “That bitch is still alive” said Remus as he chugs another drink

“We’re wasting our lives.” Said Roman as they are all slightly drunk “Ok I refuse to give up we’re still celebrities we still have power.” “Yeah well The Times casted you out” said Thomas as he poured another drink “Yep they wrote you off as aging narcissist and I’m only allowed to call Remus that.” “I still don’t understand what’s wrong with that.” Said Roman as he drinks even more. “You know what we will become celebrity arsonist.” “Babe it’s call celebrity activist we are not burning down another building like last time.” “Ok everyone think of causes.”

“Poverty”

“World hunger”

“Too big we need something we can handle”

“Let’s see whats trending” said Janus “Trump, trump, trump, ooo how about this boy he’s all over Twitter. His names Patton Heart. He’s from edgewater, Indiana. He’s gay. He wanted to take his boyfriend to the highschool prom and the pta went apeshit and canceled it.”

We are now in Edgewater, Indiana and Patton Heart is watching the head of the pta, Mrs Green being interviewed. “We have very strict rules for prom. Young ladies must wear non-revealing dresses. Young men must wear suits or tuxes. And if a student chooses to bring a date it must be of the opposite sex” “Can’t you just ban this student?” “Well we’ve been advised that there may be some legal repercussions if we prevent this boy from attending so although it breaks my heart we have no choice to cancel prom.” We move to Mr Virgil Hawkins the principal “The first thing I’m going to do is contact the state attourney this is not about school rules this is a civil right case.” “Wait seriously?” Said Patton. “Yes and if word gets out people will get mad and next thing you know some modern day Eleanor Roosevelt is gonna come and hell’s gonna break loose.”

We move back to New York “We got to go down their and raise holy hell” exclaimed Roman “We’ll be the biggest thing to happen to Indiana since........whatever’s happen in Indiana are you with me!?!” Said Remus as he and Roman start stand on top of a table they all cheered “We’ll get Joan to tag along to find us a venue” “I just book us a non-union tour of Godspell and I goes through Indiana we can ride on the bus.” Said Thomas “Can we do this guys” Said Janus “You bet your sweet MILF ass we can jannie”

🎶 We are gonna prove that in this day and age being gay isn’t a crime. This is out moment to change the world one homo 🎶

🎶Homo🎶

🎶Homo 🎶

🎶Homo🎶

🎶At a time🎶

🎶 we’re gonna help that little homo, whether he likes it or not, when your a legendary thespian 🎶

🎶First you help the distressed 🎶

🎶Then you help the distraught🎶

🎶We’re gonna go to where the necks are red and lack of dentistry thrives, Why sing and dance when you can take a stance🎶

🎶And know your truly changing lives. We’re gonna March until that town looks like the end of act one in les mis. You don’t gotta have a Ph.D in psych to know that people kowtow to the folks in the biz🎶

🎶We’re gonna teach’em to be more PC the minute or group arrives🎶

🎶That’s right🎶

🎶Those fist-pumping🎶

🎶Bible-thumping🎶

🎶Spam-eating🎶

🎶Cousin-humping🎶

🎶Cow-tipping🎶

🎶Shoulder-slumping🎶

🎶Tea-bagging🎶

🎶Jesus-jumping🎶

🎶Losers and their inbred wives. They’ll learn compassion🎶

🎶And better fashion🎶

🎶Once we at last start changing lives!!!!🎶

🎶Now let’s go help that dyke🎶

People to tag/ @artissijules

This took a long time to write

[jemej3m]

Dare You

anon asked:

If your still doing prompts... What about if Neil and Andrew are friends and Neil figures out that he likes Andrew and asks his friends how to woo him and then Andrew has to deal with Neil's terrible attempts at wooing. But everything neils doing is the same thing that Andrews been doing but in his own way? Idk, the idea just won't leave me alone and I'd love to see how amazing you could write it. Love your writing besides, it always makes my day :)

also on ao3!!

*

Neil and Andrew had been friends for 5 years when they have their first kiss. 

The context? Neil’s small-town friends had all found themselves at the same university. Obviously, they banded together. Obviously, there were parties. Neil’s not a party person himself, but he loved his eclectic family and wanted spend time with them whenever he could. He’d moved to Palmetto when he was 13 with his mother, and as the youngest of the group, watched as the rest of them moved on from middle school to high school, and then from high school to college. 

But now they were all back together again. 

Thus developed his (mild) enjoyment of Allison or Nicky’s chaotic fiascos, which were technically parties, just lacking any rhyme or reason. 

Andrew wasn’t a party person either: in high school, he, Neil and Renee would have movie nights instead, waiting for the rest of them to stumble home in drunken stupors. 

He still tagged along to these gatherings, though. Maybe because Neil and Renee were now commonly in attendance. Neil didn’t think that Andrew would come just for Neil, but he hadn’t worked out why Andrew had become so inclined to participate. Maybe because Aaron was there, and they were trying to patch things up with one another. Their mother’s accident had really put a rift between them. 

“Are you playing?” Allison demanded. “Neil, you’re playing. Renee’s managed to convince Andrew to play, so you’re playing.” 

“Fine,” Neil mused, mostly to appease the inebriated monster that Allison was. No attention was paid to him in these drinking games, mostly because he didn’t drink, but also because he didn’t do anything too unreserved. 

“Great!” she cheered, slinging an arm around his shoulder and brought him to the circle. He automatically took his seat next to Andrew, and felt his friend lean closer. 

Friend was a loose term. Neil and Andrew were almost attached at the hip: When Neil’s mom had died two years ago, Andrew snatched him away and got a spare mattress in his bedroom till Neil had enough money to afford rent somewhere. Andrew was the only one who knew every horrific detail of Neil’s violent childhood, and the only one who’d seen the scars left by his dead-beat dad. Neil was the only one who knew everything about Andrew, too. 

“Spin the bottle, Allison?” Dan leered as the girl put an empty beer bottle in the centre of the circle. Everyone was there. “We’ve got family members here!” Aaron mimed a retching action as Nicky laughed, clapping loudly. 

“It’s just to pick who has to do truth or dare,” Allison retorted, waving the bottle in Dan’s face. “You wanna go first, huh? I’ll pick out your dare for you, Wilds. A personal attribute!”

“No way,” Dan laughed, leaning back into Matt’s shoulder. The guy was half asleep: alcohol did that to him, sometimes.

“Fine, I’ll spin it,” Allison huffed. With a little too much vigour, she flicked the neck of the bottle, sending it spinning wildly. 

And of course, it had to land on Neil. 

“First of the night!” Nicky crowed. 

“Neil’s just going to pick truth,” Allison complained. “And make us all sad.”

Neil grinned at her. “Not my fault you grew up in a guilded bubble.” 

“Shut the fuck up. Choose!”

Neil hummed, cocking his head to the side. 

“Don’t do something stupid,” Andrew warned under his breath. 

“Dare,” Neil said. 

“Here we go,” his best friend sighed. 

“Fuck yeah,” Allison grinned. “What should we make you do, hm? We all know you can and will eat anything without even flinching, no clothes-off, no alcohol...” 

“Maybe he should go try and steal something,” Kevin slurred. “He’s good at it. Fuckin’ hot-wired a car once, for the hell of it.” 

“Fuck off, Kevin,” Neil managed, ignoring the incredulous looks that the others were giving him. 

“When the hell did you manage that?” Dan demanded. “Never mind. I don’t want to know.” 

“He should kiss Andrew,” Matt mumbled, burrowing his face into the crook of Dan’s shoulder. No one heard him. 

“We should see if he can jump from the dorm roof!” 

“No,” Andrew said. 

“He should shotgun three Caprisuns,”

“Too easy!”

“Fine, five!” 

“He should kiss Andrew,” Matt repeated, sitting up and blinking the sleepiness away. 

The circle grew quiet. 

“Yeah,” Allison breathed, grinning wildly. She looked to Neil. “You’ve gotta kiss Andrew.” 

Neil glanced at Andrew, whose gaze was hooded as he glared at the been in his hand. 

“I’m not doing that if Andrew doesn’t want to,” Neil said. 

Andrew shrugged. “I don’t care.”

“See?” Allison said, gesturing wildly. “Pucker up, Josten.” 

“Well, this isn’t how I expected this to go,” Neil muttered. Andrew looked up at him, something making his eyes sparkle. “Tonight, I mean.” 

“Right,” Andrew said. “Well? Hurry up.”

Neil hadn’t kissed many people before. Andrew knew that all too well: he’d heard about all three of Neil’s dating disasters in meandering rants about expectations and Neil’s lack of interest in - well, anyone, really. 

He was overthinking this. It was just a kiss. 

“And no measly pecks, either!” Dan insisted.

Andrew didn’t care. It was just a kiss.

Neil felt all stiff and awkward, because he had no idea what he was doing, but it was fine, because Andrew was tilting his head and lifting up his hand to press his fingertips to Neil’s cheek, tilting up his chin a bit. Neil let him. 

When Andrew drew back, all Neil could think was that his lips were so soft. So soft. Everything about the kiss had been feather light, which wasn’t like Andrew at all. 

Neil learned new things about Andrew every day. 

“Happy?” Andrew said, facing the circle once more. Allison was cheering as Nicky and Aaron gave each other all-knowing side eye: Dan was clapping, and Matt was looking right at Neil with his head tilted to the side. “Now: go pick on someone else.” 

“Someone your own size, might you say?” Nicky teased. Andrew flipped him off. 

It had been a nice kiss, Neil thought. He didn’t know Andrew could kiss like that. 

“You with us, Neil?” 

Neil glanced up and found everyone looking at him. “Yeah? Why?” He frowned. “Did it land on me again?” Did he have to kiss Andrew again? He didn’t want to: not in front of everyone, at least. 

Wait, what?

“You’ve been spared for now,” Allison grinned. Neil flipped her off. 

And that was Andrew and Neil’s first kiss. 

*

Neil burst into Matt and Kevin’s dorm room - obviously, he and Andrew shared one, and Aaron was in the fancy dormitory for academic scholarship students - in a small frenzy. 

“Hey,” he told Kevin, who was sitting on his bed minding his own business. “Fuck off.” 

Kevin glared at him. “You realise this is my room?”

Matt took off his headphones, looking over his shoulder from the tiny desk he’d crammed in at the end of his bed. It was comedically small in comparison with his gargantuan frame. 

“Please?” Neil begged. “I need to talk to Matt.” 

“Why can’t I hear it?” Kevin demanded. “I’ve literally known you longer than anyone else. We used to watch each other shit in toddler potties, Neil.” 

That was true. Still, Neil needed Matt, his not-childhood friend. 

“Dude,” Matt said. “Neil and I are bros. Somethings are just bro to bro. You talk to Andrew about shit you don’t talk to Neil about, yeah? Y’all are like brothers. That’s different from being bros.”

“None of that made sense,” Kevin muttered, packing up his shit. He glared at Neil. “I’ll be in the common room. You’re making up for this by editing my thesis.” 

“Looking forward to it,” Neil said dryly, ushering Kevin out the door and leaning against it, feeling a little breathless. 

Matt jumped onto his bed, patting the spot next to him. “Come hither, child.” 

“I hate it when you say that,” Neil complained, dutifully crossing the tiny room and curling up into a ball on the mattress next to him. Matt patted him on the shoulder gently, though it still managed to send shocks right to his fingers and toes. Matt was just a big guy. 

“What’s this all about?” Matt pushed, when Neil stayed in a curled ball. 

Neil’s head flopped back, thudding against the wall. He swallowed, staring at the ceiling. 

“I like Andrew.” 

“Well, that’s good news,” Matt laughed. 

“No, Matt.” Neil glared towards the window. “I think I’m in love with Andrew.” 

“Yes,” Matt said earnestly. “I know.” 

Neil’s neck nearly snapped what with how fast he looked at Matt. “What?”

His friend snorted. “Dude, you’ve always been infatuated with him. We’re best friends, Neil. You and Kevin are best friends. Do you really want to go cuddling up with either of us, like you do with Andrew? Do you spend hours with either of us at a time, just talking? Do you dream about us? Have you told us everything about you?”

“How do you know I’ve done those things with Andrew?” Neil accused, even though he was completely right. 

Matt shrugged. “That’s how I am with Dan.” 

“We’ve cuddled,” Neil said weakly. 

Matt slung his arm around Neil’s narrow shoulders. It was like wearing a blanket. “Hell yes, we have. But that’s not what I mean.” 

“We don’t do that.” 

“Head out of the gutter, bucko. Remember that photo Allison managed of the two of you? Asleep on the couch? You were literally asleep on Andrew’s chest: one of his legs was hooked over your hip. That’s some serious canoodling, bro.” 

“You’ve analysed us that intensely,” Neil said flatly. 

Matt snorted. “It’s kinda hard not to. You’re both all over each other. I’d say it’s sweet if it wasn’t, well, you and Andrew.”

“So if you knew I liked him,” Neil complained. “Why’d you dare me to kiss him? Now I’m aware of it, and I hate it!”

“That was kinda the point,” Matt admitted. “Why the hell do you hate it? Love is a good thing!” 

“Need I remind you of my parents?” 

Matt shoved him gently. “Don’t start pulling the parent card. Neil, you’ve loved Andrew for years. And - well, I can’t really read him, no one can - I think he likes you back.” 

“He does not,” Neil insisted. 

“He does!” Matt sung. “You know what you have to do now, Josten?”

“No,” Neil said, sullen. 

“You’ve gotta woo him.” 

“Here we go,” Neil mumbled. 

Matt winked. “Don’t worry. I’ve got you. Andrew will be head over heels for you in no time.”

*

“So,” Neil said, sitting on his bed. Andrew was reading a book, his reading glasses perched on the end of his nose. He only wore them in their room, even though everyone knew Aaron had reading glasses and thus Andrew would have to wear them too. He had his armbands off and a pair of knitted socks on. Neil had become so keenly aware over everything that constituted of Andrew recently: it was driving him up the wall.  

Andrew looked at Neil from over his book. “What?” 

Neil shrugged. “I don’t know. Do you want to go somewhere?” 

Andrew glanced at his watch. “Now?” 

Neil shrugged again. 

“What’s this about?” Andrew asked, sitting up.

“Nothing!” Neil stressed. “Just thought it might be good to - get out?” 

“It’s a Tuesday evening,” Andrew said flatly.

Neil deflated. “We don’t have to go.” 

Andrew sighed. “Fine.” Neil perked up. “Where did you want to go?” 

Neil hadn’t thought that far ahead. “David’s?” 

“David’s,” Andrew repeated. “Neil, you don’t like diner food.” 

“Well, now I do!” He really needed to stop the hiccups in his voice. Stuffing his feet into his shoes, he yanked on his coat and shoved his keys and phone into his pocket. 

“Now I’m even more suspicious,” Andrew said, watching Neil’s erratic behaviour with mild amusement. “You’ve never willingly taken that phone with you unless I forcefully reminded you too.” 

He needed it to text Matt. “We all learn and grow,” he said breezily, escaping out the door. “Hurry up, I want coffee!” 

“It’s nearly fucking midnight,” Andrew growled. 

He skipped ahead till he arrived at the dorm’s parking lot: Andrew’s was in the corner, where it couldn’t be scratched. After his mother’s death he’d used his portion of her life insurance to buy the thing, but it hadn’t got him more than a heap of junk. He’d spent a whole summer fixing it up: Neil had watched him from the corner of his garage, a little mesmerised. 

Fuck, he liked Andrew so much. He could hardly contain it within himself. 

He switched the radio to Andrew’s favourite channel as they drove to David’s, an old diner on the corner of campus. It was run by a grouchy old man by the name of David Wymack, hence the name. He served the only pancakes Andrew would speak well of, and sometimes Neil could withstand the fruit smoothies. 

Andrew glanced over at Neil at the music choice - Neil almost always usually bickered with him about playing heavy rock when it got past 9 o’clock - but said nothing, continuing to drive. 

There was almost no one in David’s when they arrived, even though he usually shut at one. Neil was relieved for that: he didn’t feel like anyone watching him as he failed miserably at wooing Andrew Minyard.

Andrew got his pancakes and Neil decided to try the blueberry smoothie, sans ice cream. 

“What is wrong with you,” Andrew muttered. 

It clearly wasn’t going well. Neil grimaced and shrugged. “Dunno.” 

Andrew squinted at him. “Are you upset?”

“What? No!”

“Can you bozos stop wasting my time?” Wymack huffed. 

“Fuck you too, old man,” Andrew said. Wymack flipped him off and proceeded to put an extra scoop of ice-cream onto Andrew’s plate. Their relationship was baffling, especially after Andrew worked the summer here with Renee. 

They sat at a corner table, a little ceramic jug with plucked daisies plonked in the centre of the red-and-white chequered table cloth. 

“You seem jittery,” Andrew said. 

“I’m fine,” Neil managed. Andrew reached out with his hand under the table to stop Neil’s leg from bouncing. The heat from his palm was addictive. Neil made a strange squawking noise, and Andrew immediately withdrew his hand. 

“You’re fine,” Andrew repeated. 

“Yup,” Neil insisted. Andrew’s pancakes arrived, so Neil tried to distract himself from the ruffled blonde hair and pale eyelashes and the freckles on his nose, sipping at the smoothie. Neil didn’t know what to do with that information. It was quite unnerving. 

They were done by half-past-twelve, when Andrew decided to get up and leave without warning. Neil - in a moment’s panic - took one of the daisies from the jug and hopped up after him. 

Andrew was leaning against his car door, lighting up two cigarettes. Moonlight shone down, curling in his hair and curving across his jaw. Neil found himself a little star struck. 

Andrew offered up the second cigarette and Neil took it from between his fingers with his lips, like he usually did. This time all he could notice was how close it put them, and the shape of Andrew’s lips. Now Neil knew what they felt like, too. 

This is ridiculous, Neil thought. 

“Why are you holding a flower?” Andrew asked. 

Neil looked down to where the daisy rested in his palm. He brought it up and tucked it behind Andrew’s ear. The tips of Andrew’s ears went very pink: he had to be warm in that large sweater of his. 

“Don’t know,” Neil answered truthfully, looking at where the daisy drooped down over the shell of Andrew’s ear. 

“Okay,” Andrew managed, though his voice was a bit strained. What if he was allergic to daisies? No, that was ridiculous. Neil would know if he was allergic to daisies. 

They finished their cigarettes in the quiet. Everything was so muddled. Neil just wanted it to go back to normal. And yet: he wanted to kiss Andrew. 

Fucking hell, he thought. 

*

“Back to the drawing board,” Neil announced, bursting into Matt’s dorm room again. Kevin wasn’t there, thankfully. 

Matt arched his brow. “Huh?”

“Date and flowers didn’t work. What the hell do I do?”

His friend hummed. “What about gifts? Is there something you could give him that’s romantic?” 

“He likes chocolate?” Neil hedged.

“Could work,” Matt acknowledged. “Or, you know, we could make him jealous.”

“Absolutely not,” Neil grimaced. 

“Just a thought.” 

“I don’t know what I’m doing,” Neil groaned, sinking into a puddle on the floor. 

The door opened as Kevin stepped through. He didn’t even pause, stepping right over where Neil had melted onto the floor. 

“Don’t mind him,” Matt acknowledged. 

Neil made an exasperated noise. 

“Have you always been so dramatic?” Kevin acknowledged. 

“Maybe you could recite a monologue to him,” Matt suggested. 

Kevin frowned. “Who?” 

Before Neil could shush him, Matt sung out “Andrew!” with a cheerful smile. 

Kevin signed. “Fucking finally. Everyone’s been waiting years for the two of you to sort yourselves out.” 

“What?” Neil sat up. “Are you serious?” 

Kevin shrugged. “It’s pretty obvious.” 

“For fuck’s sake,” Neil groused. 

“He’s trying to woo Andrew into liking him back,” Matt informed Kevin. 

Kevin frowned. “Why don’t you just tell him that you like him?”

“Because that’s mortifying?” 

“You’re such a horribly adjusted human being,” Kevin muttered. 

“He’s kinda right,” Matt acknowledged. “I just kept asking Dan on dates till she accepted.”

“No,” Neil hoisted himself to his feet. “I’ll figure it out. It won’t have to come to that.” He glared at both of them. “Thanks for nothing. Neither of you know anything about relationships.” 

“We are both in committed, loving, long-term partnerships,” Kevin pointed out. 

“Love you too!” Matt called as Neil stomped out.

*

Neil eventually developed a checklist. 

Spontaneous midnight date? Nope. Flowers? Definitely a no. Making him a mixtape? Not the right decade. 

Accompanying him places definitely didn’t work: Neil was late to all his classes for a week. Cooking for two also didn’t work, seeing as the only thing Neil could cook was 2 Minute Noodles. 

Chocolates was a moderate success, but it probably didn’t help the wooing cause. It didn’t help that they roomed together: Neil didn’t get much time to scheme, because neither of them were social butterflies, and their dorm room was their safe space. 

The only thing he thought could’ve been counted a success was when they decided to rewatch the last two Harry Potter movies together: Andrew yanked Neil over to his bed and they nestled into the corner to watch the films from Andrew’s laptop. Neil was so consumed by the thought kiss him kiss him kiss him that he barely registered either of the films. 

One month passed since Neil’s epiphany, then one and a half: It even got too the point that Neil jostled Andrew’s shoulder at another of Allison’s ‘parties’ and said “Remember the last time she made us participate?” to which Neil only received an odd look and stale silence.

He also tried to rig one of Allison’s silly games, giving Andrew a piece of paper that asked do you like someone? Andrew set the thing on fire with his lighter, and the dormitory nearly had to be evacuated.

Neil was beginning to lose hope. 

“You upset, Neil?” Renee asked, dropping into the chair next to him. He was studying in the library, one of the few places he knew Andrew wouldn’t follow. 

“Hi, Renee,” Neil said, sullen. 

“I’ll take that as a yes.” She twisted herself around to face him. “What’s up?”

“Can’t talk to you about it,” Neil mumbled, resting his head on his folded arms and glaring at the table. 

“You know,” Renee said, slightly amused. “I overheard something about someone being interested in Andrew recently.”

Neil sat up. “You did? Who?” He’d fight them. Not that he was possessive, or jealous. 

Renee laughed. “You, silly.” 

Neil deflated. “Does everyone know? I feel like I was the last one to figure it out.”

Renee patted his shoulder gently. “Almost the last one.”

“What do you mean?”

“Andrew doesn’t know.”

“Good,” Neil huffed out. “That’d be embarrassing.”

Renee shook her head. 

“He’s never going to like me back,” Neil mumbled. “I’ve been trying so hard, but he won’t notice.”

“He did mention you were acting odd, recently,” Renee acknowledged. 

Neil huffed. “Yeah, well. There’s no point in keeping it up, is there? Not if nothing will happen.”

“You know,” she said. “I always found clarity in honesty.” With that, she winked and slid off her stool. “See you around, Neil.”

“Yeah,” Neil muttered. “See you.”

*

Neil dressed quickly in the shower stall and hooked his towel over his shoulder, carrying his small caddy back to his room. He was wearing old pyjamas: fire-engine truck flannels with one of Matt’s oversized (or normal sized, for him) hoodies that went all the way to his fingertips. He shook out his wet hair as he traversed from the bathroom back to his dorm room and shouldered his way in, the door unlocked. That meant Andrew was back. 

And back, Andrew was: facing the wall, he was tugging off a turtleneck sweater and yanking on a t-shirt that Neil recognised as his: he’d already changed into grey sweats that were too long for him, hanging around the ankles. 

Neil slowly put his soap back onto his little shelf, hanging his towel on a wall hook. Andrew glanced over his shoulder at him, acknowledging Neil’s presence, before going back to unpacking from his day and readying for bed. 

Neil felt sucker-punched. 

“Andrew?” 

He glanced back again, brows furrowing at Neil’s strange tone. “What?”

When Neil couldn’t answer, he dropped what he was doing and came closer. His fingers curled in Neil’s collar, tugging him closer. 

“You’re pale as shit,” he commented. “Are you going to collapse?”

“I’m already falling,” Neil joked weakly. 

“What?”

“What?”

Andrew stepped back. Dammit, Neil thought. “What the hell is going on, Neil? You’ve been acting fucking weird for ages, now.”

“I really like you,” Neil breathed out. 

Andrew froze. 

“I wasn’t meant to say that,” Neil bit out, folding his arms over his chest. “But I can’t get over it. Ever since we kissed I’ve been kinda losing my mind, and everyone’s told me I’ve liked you for years -” 

“Shut up,” Andrew said fiercely, stomping right up into Neil’s space, crowding him against the door.

“Um,” Neil mumbled, blinking. 

“You’re the worst,” Andrew hissed. “You’ve been doing all this shit because you like me? I thought you were working up to telling me you were leaving!”

“What?” Neil echoed. 

“Shut up,” Andrew complained. “You’re the fucking worst. I hate you.” 

And then he kissed him. Andrew kissed Neil, that is. It was definitely one of the best moments of Neil’s life, which wasn’t saying much, considering his track record. Still, Neil’s fingers spread out across Andrew’s shoulder blades as his hands grasped Neil’s jaw, kissing him for real, this time. 

Neil had been right: it was definitely better when there was no one else watching. 

Andrew’s shoulders were hunched over when he fell back, pressing his forehead to Neil’s shoulder. 

“You like me?” Neil asked, voice higher and breathier than he thought he could manage. “Since when?”

“I hate you,” Andrew retorted. Then, quieter, he said: “Since forever.” 

Neil’s hands pressed him closer: this wasn’t unfamiliar, the proximity, Andrew’s touch, breath wafting over bare skin. But the warmth encompassing it made sense now. 

“Okay,” he said. And then: “Me too.”

“Were you trying to woo me with 2 Minute Noodles?” Andrew inquired.

“No,” Neil said sheepishly. 

Andrew shook his head, tilting Neil’s head down for another kiss. Then he signed against Neil’s lips. “I hate you. So much.” 

Neil grinned.

*

HEEHEEE

[cutesuki--bakugou]

Times Two

Your husband is cloned by a quirk and you just so happen to love that. So what do you do? The only thing that makes sense, of course. 

Rating: Explicit Warnings: Sex (anal and vaginal), DP, foreplay, blowjob, throat fucking, vulgar phrases and words Words:   4681 Pairing: Bakugou Katsuki (x2) x Fem! Reader

a/n: I’m sorry if it’s a bit confusing to tell the difference between clone and real Bakugou. I have it set up like Bakugou = Real. Katsuki = Clone. The reader specifies it as well to try and clear some stuff up. But yeah, this is the naughtiest thing I’ve written in a while and I took some risks, hopefully it works out and y’all enjoy it! Don’t forget to read past the “Read More”! 

BTW, please blacklist the tag cutesuki-lemons if you do not want to see this content from my blog. I will no longer be tagging with specific keywords for this type of content.Thank you~

Due to the nature of this post, the characters are 18+

Edit: I forgot to add the anon that requested and inspired this lovely idea, I’m sorry! Thank you so much for sending this in! (⋟﹏⋞)

Being married to the explosive Bakugou Katsuki, there is very little that surprises you. That man, as hot headed and rough around the edges as he could be, was always surprising you in one way or another in the forms of sentimental gestures and words that no other person alive was ever meant to hear. Along with being married to him, you were more involved in the life of pro heros than you ever really expected to be, as in his late twenties, he was very quickly becoming a prominent name and popular icon. A new quirk or odd behavior was always expressed to you by him when he arrived home, as he always had something new to rant about. But this… this was not something that you were familiar with. The fact that you were staring at two sets of glaring crimson eyes made you almost feel faint, tempted to shut the door and reopen it just to make sure you weren't hallucinating. 

“Katsuki…” You stared up at the one you assumed to be the original, as he was dressed in the clothes he had left in that morning, while the other was in some outfit you had never seen before. “Why… What- I mean… There are two of you.” You gestured from one to the other and back again with an accusatory pointed finger, gaining an annoyed and almost simultaneous click of the tongue from both blondes before you. 

“No shit.” The original barked in an annoyed huff, placing a rough hand on your arm to urge you out of the way so they could enter. You followed direction, watching them shuffle in through the door before shutting and locking it into place. 

“How are there two of you? Why are there two of you? Which is the real one?” 

“I am!” With a point to his own face, Bakugou glowered down at you, the familiar snarl and wedding ring on his finger calming your initial fears. The other Bakugou, who stood awkwardly off to the side, wasn’t wearing a ring and he also gave off a different… energy to the original. It was obvious that he was confused and out of place, though he glanced around at both the environment and at you with a sense of familiarity. Before you could really even say anything else, your husband snatched you by the arm and dragged you off to a different room, making you stumble over your feet for a second before catching your footing. 

“No need to drag me around Katsuki—” 

Bakugou brought a finger to his lips, hushing you with an urgency that spiked a bit of annoyance in you. All you knew at this point was that he had better start explaining himself quickly before you got frustrated, and the look on your face must have told him that as he began to spill his guts to you. 

“Sorry. Look, while I was out at a call, a villain touched me and used their quirk on me to try and catch me off guard. It didn’t work, but it did make him. He is literally me, down to memories and feelings. We have to get rid of him!” 

A frown crossed your lips as you glanced out of the doorway, seeing the clone wander about while looking at pictures along the wall. “He’s… not having like a crisis or something? I’m surprised he’s not upset.” 

Bakugou shook his head, letting his hands fall down your arms to tenderly hold your hands. “After the villain was caught, she explained her quirk… They may be exactly like me, but they won’t ever realize they’re going to fuck off when they fall asleep. Fuck off as in… turn into a doll. And even though he has all my memories and shit he’s… very compliant.” 

“Hm… When he falls asleep he’s gonna turn into a doll? Why don’t we just let him hang around until night time, and he’ll go to sleep. I don’t want you to attack him and knock him out or anything… That’s so mean.” You squeezed his fingers as you tried to have him understand your point of view. “If he’s literally you, then he probably feels really comfortable here. What a shame for his final moments of existence to be fear or pain.” 

Bakugou glowered down at you, obviously annoyed with your empathy. “So what, you want to invite him to have dinner and watch TV with us and share our bed?” 

“It’s technically his bed, too. He’s you.” You gave a very nonchalant shrug, ignoring the frustrated furrow of your lovers brow. “I don’t want you to hurt him. We should make his only day alive something enjoyable. Let’s go talk to him.” 

“Babe—” Bakugou sighed as you walked away from him, towards the clone that instantly peered down at you curiously. He seemed genuinely happy at the smile on your face, and though you could tell he wanted to, he was reluctant to touch you. Fiddling with your nails as you came to stand in front of him, you gave a small cough to clear your throat, glancing back at the real Bakugou as he glared at you from his spot learning against the doorframe. 

“So, uhm…” You began, turning your attention to the Bakugou in front of you. “Things can get a little confusing I think, so… How about I call you Katsuki, and him Bakugou.” As you addressed them, you gestured to them, feeling your cheeks flush a bit at how ridiculous you sounded. “I’m used to calling him Katsuki, but it’ll be okay for now. I’ll try not to get you mixed up. Deal?” You glanced back again at Bakugou who merely shrugged in an ‘I don’t give a fuck’ manner, while Katsuki in front of you gave a calm nod. 

“Sure, [Name]. I, oh fuck, sorry—” Having unconsiciously placed his hand on your arm, Katsuki quickly pulled it away as you gave a small flinch in surprise. With this, you saw a flash of confusion and defeat across his face, as if he hadn’t been expecting you to do that. Well, of course he hadn’t. To him, you were his lover, his wife and you loved each other fiercely. Physical touch was important between you and Bakugou, and so you knew that it was just as important to Katsuki. Still, you felt conflicted yourself. You could feel the tension from behind you, fuming off of your husband like it was a tangible object. A clone of himself or not, you knew that he wasn’t going to just let another man touch you.

Deciding to change the subject, you motioned towards the bedroom with a small nod of your head, prompting Katsuki to follow you. “Come on. How about you both get comfortable and we can, uhm… Make dinner, I guess.” 

Bakugou pushed himself up off the doorframe, entering the room before either of you. “I get my tank and shorts, got it?!” 

Katsuki scoffed, reaching behind him to pull his shirt up and over his head. “Whatever, I don’t give a fuck, I’m not going to fight with myself over clothes.” 

“Hey, hey, chill. Please.” You placed a hand on Bakugou’s arm to calm him, though by the click of his tongue you got in response, it didn’t work. “You have plenty of clothes to share. Just pick an outfit.” At this point, you already felt like you were babysitting, taking a step back as the two grown men bickered over what comfortable clothes the other wanted. Though, their huffing and puffing wasn’t really what was on your mind. Looking at them, both shirtless now, you felt a heat spread through your cheeks and down to your toes. You had two versions of your husband in your house, both of them who knew who you were and loved you equally. One was definitely in a better mood than the other, but that only made it better. 

You couldn’t stop the thoughts and visions flashing through your mind of both men pleasuring you from all sides, one fucking you from behind while the other made you gag on his cock. They were identical, down to the scars and minute imperfections on their skin. You couldn’t resist the sinful thoughts, especially as they continued stripping and changing. The instant Katsuki’s gaze landed on you, catching you staring, you took in a breath and shuffled away, mumbling something about having to go to the restroom. Shutting the door a bit too loudly, you leaned against it, placing a hand on your chest as you tried to calm your heavy breathing and racing heart. 

You almost lost it there, [Name]. You gotta calm down, there’s no way the original is gonna fall for a threesome. But this is a once in a lifetime thing! To be fucked by double Katsuki’s… What a dream— 

There was a sudden rough knock on the door, startling you so badly that you almost screamed out loud. Heart now racing even worse, you took a few deep breaths, opening the door to peek out. You could instantly see that it was Bakugou, his wedding ring gleaming against the light as his hand came to rest on the door. 

“What the fuck is wrong with you, babe?” 

Opening up the door just a bit more, you allowed him to stand halfway inside so you could whisper to each other. You kept yourself close to him, tenderly caressing his upper arm as you let out a trembling breath. “I’m fine, I’m fine. It’s just… This is a lot to take in all the sudden in a… different way.” 

“Different way?” With a cocked eyebrow, he glanced over your body, noticing the timid stance and erect nipples behind the thin cloth of your t-shirt. Your flushed face and pounding heartbeat were dead giveaways as well, though instead of his usual smirk at realizing your current state, he narrowed his eyes at you. “Are you horny?!” 

“Shh!” You reached up and covered his mouth, standing on your tiptoes to look out and make sure you weren’t being listened to. “Don’t say it so loud.” 

“So you are.” Bakugou continued when you removed your hand, giving a small shrug. “Well let me in there, we’ll fuck real quick and get to— ah, wait!” Now, he shoved himself the rest of the way inside, shutting the door behind him. In the same moment, he pressed you up against it, forcing a gasp from your lips as his leg wedged firmly into place between yours. He liked to do this, pin you up against whatever solid surface he could and tease the hell out of you, until you were writhing and begging for him to fuck you. Though, this was a bit different, as his glare showed little signs of the typical lust you were familiar with seeing. 

“You little slut. You want to fuck both of us, don’t you?” With your hard swallow and guilty gaze, a smirk finally crossed his lips, gripping your chin to force you to look up at him. “I should've known you were going to be like that. You’re so obsessed with the way I fuck you, there’s no way you wouldn’t want it from two of me. What were you thinking, hm? A cock in your ass and your cunt?” His hand began to travel down your body, teasing you with just a hit of that rough touch you craved. “Like hell I’m going to share you with anyone, not even a version of myself.” 

“Why not, Katsuki?” Your eyes darted from his face down his his hips, able to see his erect member pressing against the fabric of his sweatpants. “It would be fun. And so sexy… imagine me, kneeling on the floor, face covered in your cum. Letting you take turns fucking my throat.” Clutching onto his shirt tightly with one hand, you let the other slip between your bodies, slowly and firmly palming his member through the fabric of his bottoms. “You’re already rock hard thinking about it.” 

“You think you could handle it?” Bakugou pressed his leg further up between yours to press against your sex, prompting you to eagerly grind your hips. “I leave you ruined just on my own. I don’t think you’d be able to take it. You’d be begging for mercy.” 

“You underestimate me, love. The only thing I’d be begging for is more.” You tugged him in closer, catching his lips in a heated kiss. In that same second, you were in his arms, pressed up against the door. Keeping yourself latched to him with your arms around his neck and legs around his waist, you sighed softly at the feeling of his member pressing into your sex, wishing despirately to feel him inside you. While one arm kept you firmly in position, the other hand was free to roam, his rough and calloused palm sliding up your bare thigh. His touch was like fire, telling you just how seriously turned on he was, too. Just maybe you could get him to agree… after letting him have a little fun on his own first. 

“Please,” you moaned breathlessly into the kiss, reaching down between your bodies to slip his manhood free from his clothes. “I need to feel you inside me. Right now.” As you moved your poor excuse for pajama shorts and underwear side, Bakugou complied, shifting your body just enough to slip himself inside you. You felt every inch of your body tingle in excitement and pleasure, your heart racing at the sound of his groan against your cheek. He may have teased you about being obsessed with the way he made love to you, but you knew that he was just as addicted. Even though he put on a tough show, you could easily make him do whatever you begged for, like he was wrapped around your little finger. A simple touch or glance could have him immediately wanting you, and now that you had him this far, you knew that you could weasel your way into adding another cock to the party. 

You didn’t have much time to contemplate exactly how you would pull that off, distracted as he began to thrust his hips, fucking you at a rough and hard pace that made the wooden door at your back sqeak and rattle with each movement. Every inch of him vanished within your depths with each stroke, fogging your mind to everything but the irresistible pleasure. You were so engrossed, in fact, that you didn’t hear footsteps approaching the door from the other side, only able to focus on Bakugou’s lips and teeth against your skin. 

Suddenly, you felt an emptiness at your back and a wash of cold air swallow you both as the door to the restroom was swung open rapidly. With a squeal from your lips and a sharp inhale from Bakugou, you began to tumble backwards at the loss of support. Though, just as soon as it had gone, it was back again, though the presence that you found your back against was more familiar and warm than the cold wooden door. You were now pressed against Katsuki’s chest, his hands gripping onto your upper arms tightly to support the weight of both of you. 

“Hey, what the fuck?!” Bakugou barked at his mirror image, glaring at Katsuki over the top of your head. “Get that smirk off your face asshole, who the fuck invited you?!” 

“[Name] did. You think I didn’t hear you two talking in there or could tell what she was thinking?” Katsuki’s hands slid under your arms, gripping and squeezing your breasts roughly. You couldn’t resist a soft gasp, the mutual feeling of Bakugou inside you and now Katsuki’s hands on you making your head swim. “I saw her staring at us. Just like you, I know exactly what she wanted. And you weren’t exactly subtle, fucking against the door like that. It’s like you wanted me to notice.” 

Trembling, you clutched onto Bakugou’s shoulders tightly, lightly rocking your hips to move him within you. “You two stop fighting and just fuck me already!” 

Bakugou complied without a moment's hesitation, using Katsuki’s leverage to keep you stable. Your voice squeaked out in pleasure as you laid your head back, catching Katsuki’s gaze. The lust in his crimson glare was so clear, feeling a heat rush to your face as he smirked against your cheek, one hand coming up to wrap around your throat. “That’s it, babe,” He hissed in your ear, making your heart flutter violently. His other hand left your breast and vanished elsewhere for a moment, and you could only hope that he was preparing himself for what you wanted most. “You’re such a naughty little bitch. Tell me what you want.” 

As Katsuki’s lips came to hover near yours, you could feel it, the hard presence of his cock against your ass as it bounced with Bakugou’s thrusts. The fire inside you began to swell, unable to tear your eyes away from your lovers clone and his hypnotizing crimson glare. “I-I want you both! I want your cock in my ass— ah!” Your voice squeaked as Bakugou increased his speed and roughness, pulling your attention to him.

“Beg harder, babygirl. Beg like the cock hungry slut you are!” 

You knew exactly how he wanted you to talk, how filthy he wanted you to be, and it wasn’t something you were going to resist. “P-please, fuck me in my cunt and my ass! Fill me up and use me!” 

Again, your pathetic excuse for clothing was moved aside, with Bakugou pausing just long enough to let Katsuki sink his length into your ass. You and Bakugou were no strangers to anal sex, so it wasn’t as if that was what shocked you. No, it was the feeling being completely full, not a single inch of you untouched. There was new pleasures you had never felt before, the heat inside you almost unbearable, and yet, you loved it. Pressed between these two men, who were alike in every sense of the word, cocooned you in warmth, bringing an odd sense of sleepiness to your mind. That is, until they began to move, very quickly finding a rhythm. They didn’t alternate like you expected. Instead, they matched each others pace, making you melt into puddy in their hands. 

Trapped in their arms, you couldn’t move, only able to anchor yourself to something with your hands, which clutched onto Bakugou’s shirt and shoulders. Just from the look on his face, you could tell that it felt different for him as well, though in what way you couldn’t really imagine. All you cared about was the fact that he was enjoying it, and so was Katsuki from the groans and soft curses you heard near your ear. Within no time, you could feel it, the pleasure building into a ball in your core, until it exploded in a rush of moans, trembling and uncontrollable jerks of your body. 

“Oh fuck, babygirl, that’s it,” Katsuki purred in your ear, both men having to stop from the pressure of your contracting walls. “You’re such a good girl.” Through your panting and soft gasps, Katsuki turned your head with a push of his thumb, catching your lips in a passionate kiss. His tongue invaded your mouth instantly, forcing you into that submission that you loved and leaving you breathless. 

“She’s gotten off too easy,” Bakugou huffed, removing himself from inside you and leaving you aching for his return. “Put her ass on the bed.” 

Complying, Katsuki released your lips and removed himself from you as well, taking on the full weight of your body to walk you over to the bed. Dropping you onto the mattress, you bounced with the impact, gazing up at both men expectantly. Smirk on his lips, Bakugou removed his shirt, coming to stand at the side of the bed. Without questioning or waiting for instruction, you scooted your body closer, instantly taking his hard and throbbing cock into your mouth as you rolled over onto your stomach. Propping yourself up on your arms, you lovingly tended to his member, running your tongue along the underside and stroking him with that firm grip you knew he loved. With a pleasured sigh, Bakugou ran his fingers through your hair, stopping at the base of your head to apply pressure to keep you from going anywhere. 

Taking a curious glance up at his face, you could instantly tell why, his gaze following Katsuki as he climbed onto the bed behind you. Eager hands gripped your ass, squeezing and spreading you open, even though you still had your shorts and underwear on. “What a filthy little slut you are, drenched through your clothes like that.” A hard smack to your ass followed his words, making you squeak and unconsciously take Bakugou’s cock deeper into your mouth. After another rough slap, your clothes were pulled down, leaving you exposed to him. The chill of the room was short lived as he slipped his cock between your legs, urging you to squeeze them together before he began thrusting his hips. The way his cock stroked against your clit sent tingles across your skin, your moans muffled by the dick in your mouth. The more pleasure you received, the more you gave, turning Bakugou into his own panting and grunting mess. 

Eventually, with a tight grip of your hair, you knew what was about to happen. Removing your hands from him, you kept your mouth and head loose for him, allowing him to thrust his hips. He was going slow at first, like he usually did, soaking in the feeling of his tip pressing into the back of your throat. You could barely register the sounds coming from behind you, merely following direction as you were told to squeeze your thighs together tighter. 

Bakugou scoffed, glaring at his clone with a smug smirk on his lips. “What’s wrong, you fucker? About to cum already?” 

You gave a muffled squeal as Katsuki increase the roughness of his thrusts, feeling yourself about to peak again just from the stroking of your clit. “Whether you’re in or not, she’s going to be covered in cum by the time I’m done with her. I’ll cum as many times as I fucking feel like.” With a shuddering of your body as you came, you were given some reprieve from the cock in your mouth to breathe, fighting between coughing and moaning as you stroked Bakugou’s length in the meantime. As you were still cumming, you felt a hot release all over your legs, listening as Katsuki grunted with his own release. It coated your thighs and cunt, surprising you a bit with how much there seemed to be. With a heavy sigh, Katsuki took a moment to recover, spreading his cum across your pussy with his thumb. “What a pretty sight.” 

Before you could even think of a response, Bakugou forced his cock back into your mouth, fucking your throat at his own pace and roughness. You couldn’t even react to the sudden feeling of Katsuki’s cock sinking into your pussy, fucking you from behind at an equally rough pace. It was exactly as you had imagined, a mixture of pleasure and pain that had your eyes rolling back, once again completely at their mercy. Every inch of your body felt more sensitive than it ever had before, even your nipples as they scraped against the fabric of your shirt enough to add to the pleasure. 

“You want my cum all over your face, babygirl? Or do you want to swallow it?” Bakugou didn’t give you any chance to even answer, coming to his own conclusion just from the pleading furrow of your brow and tears pricking at the corners of your eyes. You wanted to feel it on your skin, to have him dirty you up as his counterpart had. You wanted to feel the heat of his essence on you, to watch his face as he jacked off on your face. So, that is what you received, with Bakugou removing himself from your mouth at the last moments. He gave you just enough time to open your mouth wide, catching what little bit of his cum on your tongue that you could while your body rocked with Katsuki’s thrusts. 

Leaning his head back as he came, Bakugou’s smirk spread, watching your body for a moment before he gripped your chin, giving Katsuki a quick glance that told him to stop. The clone did so, slowly removing himself from within you before filling you back up again in slow and teasing thrusts. Using his thumb, Bakugou spread his cum across your cheek and to your lips, allowing you to lick and suck it off his fingers. 

“You like the taste of my cum, don’t you?” 

“Yes,” You answered breathlessly, staring up at him through blurry and teary vision. “I love it. I love your cum—” Your voice hitched as Katsuki removed himself from your pussy, sinking his cock instead into your ass as deep as it would go. Once done, he grabbed your arms and shifted your positions, laying down as he pulled your body back against his. Understanding, you kept your legs open and displayed, panting as you smiled up at Bakugou. 

“C’mon, love. I want you both to fuck me until you’ve had enough. I told you I could take it.” 

And so you did, for hours you were treated how you had wanted to be, subdued and ravaged until your limbs were sore and body was sticky with cum and sweat. Both men had plenty to give and were just as eager to pleasure you, giving you everything you had ever wanted out of the experience. When you finally had enough was in the shower, as Bakugou enjoyed using the strongest setting of the removable shower head on your clit while they both fucked you mercilessly. You were positive that you had never had such a powerful orgasm, even sure that your mind had gone black for a few seconds as you came, pressed between their bodies just like when you had started. 

Now cleaned and so worn out you couldn’t quite move your legs, Bakugou carried you to the bed once dried off, shoving the dirtied comforter off the bed to leave mostly clean sheets for you to lay on. As he sat you down, he softly moved some hair out of your face, kissing your lips sweetly. “How was that, you stupid girl? Got your fill?” 

Smiling, you shook your head, gaining a confused cock of his eyebrow. With a wave of your arm to call Katsuki over as well, you patted both sides of the bed. “I want double cuddles.” 

“At the same time?” Both men huffed in similar tones simultaneously, making you giggle. 

“Yes! C’mon, lay with me.” 

Giving each other annoyed glances, both of them crawled into bed on either side of you. While you stayed on your back, they both squeezed in close, with Bakugou’s face resting in your hair while Katsuki pressed his lips against your cheek, showering you in soft and gentle kisses. Your heart fluttered from the sweet affection of both men, feeling for the moment that you were the luckiest woman in the world. Even if it was just for the evening, having two living version of your husband there to love you was something that you would never forget. It was sad to lose one of them, which was the particularly more affectionate one at the moment, but at least you had given him an enjoyable existence. 

“I love you.” You spoke softly, already beginning to feel sleep pulling at your mind as you reached up to softly stroke both of their cheeks. 

“I love you, too.” Both spoke in unison, filling your last waking moment for the evening with a fluffy and warm sense of love that would carry you on into your dreams.  

[mageicalwishes]

Read on AO3: Here

Rating: General Audience (Although, there is swearing)

Summary: "When I first met him, it was hammering it down. I was rushing to the main door in a desperate attempt to rescue my suede shoes, umbrella snagging against the wind, when I heard it - An impolite 'Oi! Are you new?'"

Carry On Countdown, Day 8 - Rain @carryon-countdown​

Tags: Fluff, First Meeting, Meet Cute, Alternate Universe - College/University, Nervous Baz, Awkward Baz, Carry On Countdown 2020 Day 8

Words: 943

Baz

When I first met him, it was hammering it down. I was rushing to the main door in a desperate attempt to rescue my suede shoes, umbrella snagging against the wind, when I heard it - An impolite “Oi! Are you new?” 

I don’t know what made me turn to look (I really ought to have just ignored it. It’s best not to encourage such brazen behaviour), but, in hindsight, I’m glad that I did. Because there he was, stood, beaming down at me from his balcony - Shirt wet through and curls clinging to his face limply. Happy as a pig in mud. A sunshine amongst the grey clouds.

“Yes. Why?”

“Dunno. Didn’t recognise you. Could’a been a burglar or something. Gotta’ protect my neighbours, you know?” 

“Yes, well,” I laughed. “I assure you that I’m not. What are you - I mean what are you even doing out here? You are aware that it’s tipping it down, aren’t you?” 

“Oh yeah, I love the rain! It’s refreshing.” 

Of course. One of those people. 

“It’s irritating,” I argue. 

“Alright, Mr Grumpy. You best be getting inside then. Wouldn’t want it messing up your hair, would we?” 

“Definitely not. And please,” I scoffed. “Mr Grumpy is my father, I’m just Baz.” 

“Well then, just Baz, it was nice to meet you. I’m Simon, by the way. In case you care. I’ll see you around sometime, yeah?” 

And ‘see me around’ he did. I made sure of it. 

 Blessedly, our talks quickly became routine. Every time I heard the pitter-patter of rain against my window, I’d wait patiently by my adjacent balcony until he came stumbling out of his flat, smiling as he was willingly drenched. 

I’ll admit, that the first time I was petrified. He’d never actually invited me to do it, I just couldn’t see another way to initiate anything. I didn’t have his number. ‘Simon’ wasn’t enough to find him on any social media (I checked). So, I cast my pride aside, donned my most dapper Burberry coat, opened up my umbrella, stepped out into the wet, and braved the potential embarrassment of rejection.

And luckily for me, it worked out spectacularly. 

After that, it became our normal. For months, every time it rained we’d talk, no matter when - Night or day. For minutes or hours. It was ridiculous really - Constantly skiving off of studying to talk about which flavour of ice-cream was the best, or listen to him rant about his lecturers - but I didn’t regret it. I lived for it. I longed for it. Our conversations the undisputed highlight of my, admittedly, rather low year. It got so bad that, on my weaker days - When the weather was particularly uncooperative - I found myself casting a ‘Raining cats and dogs’ just so that I would have an excuse to see him again. 

There was no point trying to deny it - In our time together, I’d fallen hard for him. Irreparably so. (And yes, I am aware of how disgustingly pathetic that is. But I couldn't help it). He was a charming constant in my life, sweetening my days with his infectious laugh and warm, speckled skin. And I was lost to him. 

 So, when he didn’t show up today, I panicked. The last time we’d spoken, I’d made the mistake of mentioning Lamb (In some weird, desperate, definitely-not-as-subtle-as-I thought-it-was attempt to let him in on that little secret). And now he’s gone, and I’m left staring out of my window, taunted by the yellow glow of his lights. He’s home. He’s there. It’s raining - Has been for a while now. Clearly, I’ve screwed up.

Before I have even taken the time to stop and think about the many, much more logical reasons that Snow may not be out, I’m shoving on my shoes, and hurrying over to his door. Knocking with no idea what I actually intend to say. It was a risky boundary to try and cross uninvited, but there was no turning back now.

When he swung open the door, cheeks flushed and covered up to his elbows in dough, the humiliation hit. His face tilting into an amused smile, as I stood, gawping like a brainless guppy.  

“Oh, Baz, it’s you! Is everything okay?” 

He was still smiling, which was a minor comfort. But that didn’t change the fact that this was one of the most atrocious ideas I’ve ever had. 

“Yeah, I just - Sorry. I don’t know, I thought something had happened. It’s raining and you weren’t-”

“Oh, nah nothing is wrong. I just didn’t notice. I was baking so I was a bit distracted.” 

“Right. Yeah. Of course,” Shoving my hands in my pockets, I avert my eyes and stare down at his horrifically muddy Nike’s. So fucking awkward. 

“Did you want-” 

“I can leave.” 

“Oh yeah,” he smiles. “If you like. You don’t have to though.” 

“Alright. Uh … Actually, I was wondering whether you would like to go for a walk with me?” Oh shit, shit shit. Why in Merlin’s name did I say that?

He tilts his head, confused, like a bloody Golden Retriever. And it’s painful how endearing I find it. 

“In the rain?”

“Yes. Unless that’s a problem.” 

“Nah. Not for me. But, I thought you didn’t like the rain.” He smirks at me, pleased, as if he’s gotten me all figured out. Which, in fairness, maybe he does - I’ve been doing a remarkably bad job at hiding it, as of late. 

So, I just shrug (A ghastly habit I’ve picked up from him), and force myself to look back up, bringing forwards every ounce of confidence I have left. 

“I’m learning to.”