#i got very emotional at the end jhdfjgh

[soulcaging]

Minttt~ a question for you, sweets. I want you to recall those passions for your muse(s) and tell me why you decided to portray them as a muse. what do you resonate with? what do you feel when you look at your muse(s)? I say muses bc I know you have several akjfsa including all those years ago. thank you xoxo

                  OOC : ohhh monique, you SPOIL me !! ghfhdg lets see if i can put my thoughts down in a way thatll make sense to literally anyone other than me... lets hope read mores work for those who dont want a block of text ghdfhgh so sorry

when it comes to k/ris, it's always been the intrigue of someone forced against their will to do something, the idea that one day you can wake up and something foreign goes through your day for you. not even because its malicious, but because it wants to know about your life. it's just this fucked up reality k/ris lives in, but thats not the only reason i was so intrigued by them. ive always had an attachment to the human kids in ut, having rp'd them both in the past, but the worth highlighting rn is c/hara. k/ris gave me so much c/hara didnt, they gave me familial bonding and connections one can easily dig their teeth into, it was a lot more... blatant ? and i got so attached to this too. its like... this kid had a life before everything happened in dr, and i just. grabs them. shakes them. theyre SO fun to rp. i have a thing where i cant handle a lot of angst, so someone like k/ris is perfect for me -- theyre struggling with the cosmic horror of the player, sure, but theyre not just that struggle. theyre a kid, they like pranks, they play the piano, they miss their brother, they have friends, they eat things no human should... theyre just. theyre just a human being. and i love everything abt them like theyre my own kid. i care them so fuckign much.

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.................................. well... since you said muses plural, youve activated my trap card  ( talking about p/apyrus for more than 2 seconds )

PAP MY GOD DAMN BELOVED. everything about him makes my neurons light up like a god damn christmas light show in the US. its the energy, the facade of confidence, the way his unending friendliness almost comes to his detriment, how he uses his ego to not only lift himself up, but you as well, and !! so much MORE its absolutely impossible for me to say it all !!!! ive loved pap for years now, ive explored almost every valley when it comes to him in my brain, and yet i still find myself so fixated on him. even when i wasnt into ut/dr i would still talk to people about him since i think a LOT abt how its implied pap is really strong. like everyones all fixated on s/ans huh ??? what abt my BOY ????? im sure if he wasnt so friendly and if he didnt have his special attackTM stolen, he wouldve EASILY been as powerful as his brother. maybe more, since paps is the only one out of the two to mention control inputs directly. imagine.... i could genuinely ramble abt pap for years if given the opportunity but i have so many other muses i wanna talk abt so just know this: i love him.

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ah, j/evil, my most recent muse in my endless library of ut/dr muses. its so funny, i only really mused him because i already had a muse similar to him and i listened to the man on the internets version of the world revolving  ( 1 hr ver ) on loop for. hm. Too Long. i got attached to him for similar reasons as both k/ris and pap, since in the most odd of ways, hes... a combination of the two ? in a way ???   hes a ball of endless energy, a puppet who doesnt see himself as trapped, not because hes free, but because hes made himself believe he is. also, the way he talks itches so many parts of my brain, i love how distinct it is, how weird it is. hes just a funky lil guy !  hes the one i have least to talk abt, but, hes very enjoyable

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now its time for me to get emotional over my past, get ready

it all started with me musing s/ans, so in a way, i have him to thank for the fact i even started in this community !!  my passion for rping him is all but gone, but i cant forget my roots. then of course, i picked up f/risk and c/hara, and those are when i was REALLY into the community and felt like i had a voice in it.  ( im still surprised anyone would notice me, considering i was just a lil 15 y/o with shitty icons LMAO )  this community has always been so good to me, and re-meeting people i met through it  ( like you !!! )  is the easiest way for me to feel so, so, so happy. i grew up in this community, starting off as a 15 y/o, but now im 21. isnt that fucking wild ??  thats 6 years !!!  and yet im still here, i still consider everyone i met in the community friends, if not family, and if im honest... thats the biggest motivator for me to be here. my silly little family of silly little rpers. <3