#i generally don't care even about stuff i enjoy
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
herbs-and-poultices · 2 days ago
Text
That pneumonia hit me pretty hard, but I am on the mend now. And I have, indeed, been taking notes 😉
Cmmon symptoms, treatment, etc can be found online from health organizations that actually know what they're talking about, so these are just going to be a few little things from my personal experience.
Feel free to use as inspiration in anything whump-related. Enjoy!
CW: irl illness and a bit of medical stuff
In general:
When they say it can come on fast, it can come on FAST. After a bit over a week with lingering cold symptoms and the occasional low-grade fever, my temperature went from normal (98.7F / 37C) to 102.4F / 39.1C in an hour, to 103.7F (39.8 C) in the urgent care half an hour after that. Fatigue, dizziness, and shortness of breath all hit all of a sudden about half an hour in.
I had lower left lobe pneumonia (inflammation in the lower part of my left lung) and for about 3 days I had what felt like a constant stitch in my left side, in my lower ribs, that hurt to lean against or lie on.
Breathing about halfway in felt fine. Breathing more deeply than that hurt and made my lower ribs and mid-back seize up.
I'm addition to being a lovely variety of colors, the gunk I coughed up tasted foul. Really bitter, in addition to about triple the usual clingy sickly taste of mucus. And it took a few minutes for the taste to go away.
In a chair, sitting straight up was alright, but it stretched my lower ribs and made it more tiring to breath deeply. Leaning forward elbows-on-knees was sometimes better. In a bed, lying flat made breathing a lot of work, even breathing shallowly; it felt like only the top 1/4 of my lungs was functional. Leaning back at an angle felt best. Any sort of turned/twisted position hurt and made my breathing shallower and more work.
Even after the congestion/inflammation in my lower lungs cleared out and I could breathe completely pain-free, my upper airway was pretty irritated. It felt like my trachea for a few inches above and below my sternal notch was made of tissue paper. Breathing into my lower ribs felt ok, but breathing into my upper chest felt tight and made me cough.
For a modern hospital setting:
Personally, how my IV felt was directly correlated with my fever, which went up and down several times. No fever, no pain as long as I didn't move that arm too much. Fever, and the whole inside of my elbow ached.
The nebulizer treatments made me feel like jumping out of my skin. Jittery, shaking, heart palpitations, heart rate up into the 120s (when it wasn't there already), for about three hours each time. My short-acting asthma inhaler gives me a little bit of that, so I wasn't completely thrown for a loop, but this was way more intense.
If you want to add in a little more hurt-to-help / it's-for-your-own-good, you might consider acquainting your character with an incentive spirometer (aka medical self-torture device). It's a benign-looking plastic apparatus that taunts you into taking painfully deep breaths, and then usually painfully coughing. I don't know what the standard is, but I was sentenced to 10x every hour.
72 notes · View notes
salvadorbonaparte · 3 days ago
Note
Recently moved back to the US after living in germany for a bit, but I've been trying to keep up with german politics. Unfortunately I speak german at like an A2 level and don't have the reading comprehension to understand most news/memes/general conversation online. Would you be willing to just briefly explain the whole thing going on right now? I've sorta got the general idea from some American news outlets but I'm still quite confused.
Okay I'm probably missing a lot of Nuance as well but:
The current German government is a three party coalition between SPD, FDP and Green Party (traffic light coalition). Christian Lindner was minister of finance. As a FDP member he was a neoliberal piece of shit. He kept blocking government budgeting because he wanted to lower taxes for millionaires, lower retirement and unemployment benefits etc.
In a surprising turn of events our chancellor fired Lindner on Wednesday evening. He gave a speech that was absolutely scathing - for his standards. Our chancellor is known to have zero backbone or charisma and a monotone voice that puts you to sleep.
Now people find this pretty hilarious because 1) Lindner is a piece of shit 2) we've never seen our chancellor act like this. There's been plenty of memes about him being unemployed and several journalists have already asked him things like "will you apply for unemployment benefits" and "what do you think about people calling you Germany's cheekiest unemployed person".
But unfortunately the FDP didn't find this funny so now all other FDP ministers stepped back - except for one who left the party to save his job. This was also really unexpected and is also leading to lots of memes. Without the FDP, the coalition is broken and there's no longer a ruling majority. The current government will spend some time taking care of urgent stuff now and then in the beginning of next year there will be a "vote of confidence". A strategic vote of confidence will trigger a general election, which will happen next spring.
Unfortunately² the current coalition was not very popular in the first place and conservative and right wing parties are gaining lots of influence. We also have a new party called BSW funded by a former Leftist party member who is singlehandedly proving the horseshoe theory by being so leftist she's right wing. So there's a good chance the election will have pretty bad consequences.
But since it's been a really hard week for everyone we're all just enjoying making fun of Chrissy Lindner losing his job #unemployed.
If you want I can translate some of the memes as well.
Hope this helped!
16 notes · View notes
makiswirl · 5 months ago
Text
can i just say. and this is probably a niche hill to die on. that i am so gobsmacked every time someone vaguely hints at the idea that jotaro doesn't care meaningfully for the other crusaders, usually particularly kakyoin and joseph, when those two actually tend to be the ones he reacts to being hurt the hardest
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
like he cares for his loved ones!!!! that literally plays into his character motives in every single part he shows up in!!! stop lying to me!!!!!!!
#me.txt#jjba#i'm going to ramble in tags actually. excuse me#ok. rereading sdc and so confused at the general perception of jotaro and his friends/family. he's not NEARLY as flat or as dickish#i understand that the anime (particularly the dub) tends to slander him but even then he still clearly cares for them! i'm confused#i also understand that a lot of people dig against jotaro and kakyoin as a dynamic because 'they're popular' and that generally disliking#popular things across media is a thing that i've seen consistently everywhere but the discredit to them simply as a DUO and not even as a#pairing is so..... odd..... like they're considered to be a duo that clicks for a reason. i enjoyed them even before i got into the fandom#every time i see someone say jotaro is overrated/dull i take a shot and assume they're an anime-only or only read the manga like once btw#joseph and jotaro also have a neat dynamic and they obviously both love and care for each other. like they're not going to go around loudly#or anything but literally the entirety of the lovers and the prelude to the dio fight IS jotaro being worked up over joseph getting hurt#equally i don't know if it translates to the anime as much but joseph is VERY complimentary when it comes to jotaro. like he sings his#praises so often and reminds everyone that he's his grandson so frequently (d'arby the gamer is a good example of this). either way it's so#peculiar....... there's not enough avdol and jotaro content btw (also in canon) because jotaro obviously looks up to him and avdol jokes#around with him on the occasion they interact after their intro which doesn't start very well. it's very cute#i do think an important thing to note about jotaro's character is how he acts AFTER his intro because he's so drastically different. early#jotaro and later jotaro aren't the same character and i do not mean this in a character development way. excluding the jail incident he's#completely different and probably shouldn't really be taken into account (especially considering the amount of slapstick in araki's intros)#and i think that's really???? what people center on for his character? Which sucks balls bad!#anyways. i could ramble more about this if asked i have so much to say but sigh. jotaro cares so much for his friends and family he's not a#flat fully cold asshole character regardless of whether you watch the anime or ova or read the manga. you just have poor media literacy#i wouldn't recommend watching solely the anime for his character though. the dub also changes a lot so it's... questionable#i love the anime and it's still important for him though. also adds neat stuff. i need to stop myself. i have many thoughts on the matter#jotaro kujo#joseph joestar#noriaki kakyoin#adding in case anyone sees: i am not saying that he is perfect about this. in fact he is very ass about it with jolyne and holly and that's#very important. he also is in fact an asshole sometimes. NOT as much as you guys are making him though!#please don't get me started on how much of a dick etc people make kakyoin to veer away from the 'woobified' characterizations of him#in fact i think that's bad if not worse because it CLAIMS to be in character. hes a prim asshole at times but not that angry or dishevelled
188 notes · View notes
apocalypticdemon · 3 months ago
Text
I am so beyond ready to quit this job. Wednesday cannot come fast enough.
#to be fair it's bc school starts again in a few weeks#but idk. every day at this office feels like sandpaper on my skin. people always ask me shit i dont understand#and every case is so individual there's no set checklist to follow to troubleshoot#so most of the time I just grind my gears and get stuck#it'd busy more days than not.#and it was advertised to me as data entry only. client interactions was not what i signed up for.#it's all client interaction.#we're short staffed so nobody gets to take the back office and have a break.#when we weren't short staffed i was the new guy and only got 1 day in the back a week while everyone else got 2.#all my coworkers are conservative but talk like they're apolitical.#i thought it'd be fulfilling bc im helping people get benefits#but many are rude or impatient as any other service job. I'm constantly trying to direct people that don't want to listen#or explain the intricacies of something i barely understand.#and i don't want to lead people astray bc you have to start over if you blow a deadline.#but there's just nothing redeeming that i enjoy.#i hate customer service. i hate constantly asking questions. i like seldom few of my coworkers.#i can't be me at work.#and i don't care about the work itself anymore.#this job made me cry every day for weeks last month from sheer stress and overstimulation.#i almost cried myself sick several times.#the only reason I'm not there anymore is bc i dont fucking care anymore.#it took me 2 months to burn out. 2 months!#i was training for half of that!!#idk. everyone decided i was smart and could pick it up quickly so. even though everyone else got 4-6 weeks of shadowing#you can make do with 3 before you start doing stuff solo.#which feels unfair. i wasn't ready for it. and i resent the decision quite a bit.#plus it's been a nightmare for me in terms of external stressors and my generally deteriorating mental health. so.#all in all. i hate it here.#and i can't wait to turn in my notice so i can gtfo in 2 weeks#i am so tired. free me. let me go back to my music please
7 notes · View notes
starflungwaddledee · 10 months ago
Note
Ok, for an AU I'm cooking up, what if my OC Periwinkle (who is actually a fragment of Void Termina's power with the full extent of their memories and abilities, though they are nice, until you physically smack/smack talk/hurt the feelings her friends out of malice (she's able to sense emotions), then she will not hesitate to bonk you with a live explosive (expert with the Bomb copy ability) and "give you a proper lesson on not hurting my friends".) met your Galacta Knight? How would the situation play out? (Maybe Galacta comes to her universe then destroys her friend's cooking utensils, and she decides to spare the vandal no chill at all.)
hmmm i'm not suuuper comfortable answering questions like this, sorry! especially with folks who i don't know well... i don't really know your oc and i'm also not comfortable just being like "well he k-words (the oc)" to strangers who might not find that fun, yanno?
i think you'd have to characterise him in a way that suited you and your story/oc/au/needs, and then decide from there! like... what you described with the cooking utensils... no, my version of him wouldn't do anything like that haha. so you'd need to make your own charactisation where something like that worked!
i'd enjoy being That Person With The Evil Galacta Knight Characterisation and i'm happy to answer general questions about my personal hcs of him for sure, but i certainly don't have any sort of monopoly on making him nasty. i feel like there's actually a significant amount of evidence in canon itself for him to be Not Nice! so you can of course characterise your own version of him however you like too!!
the galacta knight that i personally headcanon (who is mostly present in awtdy au) is simultaneously chill and unchill. if someone minds their business and doesn't get in his way or interrupt his plans- which revolve around kirby and meta knight in awtdy au- he doesn't really care about them. this is kind of evident in the way he overlooks bandee's potential entirely.
however if they are a threat to him or his plans, he deals with them. he also sometimes takes a sadistic interest in figures he can project the things he hates onto. in our headcanons in particular he has a specific hatred of dark matter and mages, if that works for you and gives you anything to chew on! fwiw in the star allies arc of awtdy void termina is never released, because galacta knight lays eyes on hyness for 0.2 seconds before fileting him like a fish.
he's just not really a hesitater. and that takes most folks- who want to talk, who want to monologue, who maybe have the hope this can be sorted out- by enough surprise that he generally gets in there first.
19 notes · View notes
two-person-job · 1 month ago
Text
heyheyhey. do you guys wanna know a secret :}
#a reason i like yoimiya so much; especially compared to other fem characters; is because she has more obvious proof of a journey through-#-femininity. this is also a reason i like shikimori so much!#becaus etheres an entire episode where we learn about shikimori's journey through femininity#she is such a major reason i realized that i need to go on one myself#and yoimiya idk. like. i don't really care much for genshin lore BAHAHAHAH#and i haven't looked at her voice lines in a bit but#idk. she just. theres a lot more to her than there is in canon idc she's more than what she was made to be and i love her for that!!!!#but yea elaborating on honestly not usually liking fem characters as much as masc ones. even though i dont even like guys im a lesbian JDSF#but it's because they're all made just to be people. and i lvoe all hte characters i love#but i feel like so many fem characters could be so much more than they were given the chance to be if there was a hint of a journey in her#so many just feel too hollow; especially compared to the masc characters they interact with#shikimori by herself was just a fun character. a strong girl who enjoyed being soft#but getting the background of she did karate because her brother did; she left because her brother did; she followed every trend because-#-everyone else did; she kept her hair short because her brother did; she never did anythign her brother didn't explicitly do or tell her to#and then one day he told her to be more. and so she decided to be more.#idk i just think more fem and honestly masc characters should have hints of a journey through any sort of identity!!#whether it be gender or sexuality or general personality or presentation via fashion or anything!!!!!#show me them at a young malleable age and show me them growing out of that and becoming a beautiful person but beautiful in a way only THEY#-could be. and while we didn't get that for yoimiya#i can stillfeel it. maybe im just making stuff up but. like i said earlier; she feels like so much more than the canon made her to be#adn i really love that :)#i should sleep soon but i just got my spotify workin again and catabolic seed is playingg#i lov eyou all <3#thank you for reading my rant haha#:shroom is typing...#:shroomiya:#kisses kisses!! <3
2 notes · View notes
void-botanist · 8 months ago
Text
Rose's Kiss Week Day 6: Home Alone
OCs: Sierra Callawel and Ian Carlisle (Spinder's oldest sister and her husband)
Words: 1189
Content warnings: none
Notes: Ian's canid form is a common raccoon dog. It is also well-known that shifting to that form makes you itchy.
When Sierra looked up from her computer, she could see the full moon hanging too-large over the faraway trees outside her window.  She’d lost track of time.  Ian would be transformed, now, and she hadn’t seen him at all.  She locked her computer and stood up.  The kids were out, so making a circuit of the house wouldn’t draw them out of their rooms and interrupt the nice night she wanted to spend alone with her husband.
“Ian?” she called as she started up the stairs.  “Where are you?”
She heard a mournful squeaky-toy noise from somewhere down the hall and smiled to herself as she went to find the source of it.  When she flipped on the light in her bedroom, she got a louder and angrier squeak from the bed, where a golden brown and black fluff of a dog was burying his little face under his front paws.
“Sorry,” she said, going to turn on her bedside lamp before turning off the overhead light.  He didn’t raise his head until she sat down on the side of the bed, and then he tried to crawl in her lap immediately.
Laughing, she held him back gently and got fully onto the bed, leaning back against the headboard before she let him snuffle his way into her space.  He seemed content to put his paws across her legs and rest his head on them, but she scooped him up all the way, holding him close against her.  His response was to put his paws on her arm and set his head there instead.  He was probably just tired after transforming, but he always looked so cute and sad in his dog form, and it made her want to hug him tighter.  So she did, pressing her cheek to the top of his fuzzy little head and then kissing him there.  He let out a longer squeak, stretching his neck out further, and as she petted his head she followed his gaze to the brush he’d set out for her.  Oh, of course.  Grabbing it was a bit of a stretch, and she almost dumped him out of her arms accidentally, but once it was in her hand she settled him in her lap and began running it through his fur in long strokes, head to rump.  Instantly he was a dog-shaped puddle in her lap, his only reaction little snuffles of pleasure.  
When she paused to pull out the mat of hair that had collected in the brush, he rolled over onto his back, cradled in her crossed legs.  She scratched behind his ears while she drew the brush along the contours of his ribcage and haunches and arms.  He didn’t even tense as she carefully brought it over his neck and chin.  As soon as she set the brush aside, though, he was getting back out of her lap, jumping down onto the floor with a cacophony of clicking nails and pausing in the doorway to look back at her.  She smiled and followed him back downstairs to the kitchen, where he waited by the table while she got their dinner out of the fridge: sliced chicken, lentils, and a touch of cranberry sauce.  For him, at least.  She could have as much as she wanted.  His was already in a bowl, so once she pried off the lid she set it in front of him on the floor.  He wagged his tail but didn’t move.  While she made her own plate from the main bowls of food, she saw him bend down and sniff his bowl, his eyes never leaving her.  
“You can start without me,” she said.  
He made a sound somewhere between a shriek and a growl and sat straight again. With a laugh she returned the food bowls to the fridge and brought her plate to the table.  
“Blessed be the fruits of the earth, and us among them,” she said, and he squeaked out the same cadence before shoving his face in his bowl.  She ate with half an eye on him inhaling his food, mostly because his enthusiasm was adorable.  
On the way back to bed she carried him up the stairs, letting him jump down on the bed before she got into her pajamas.  He didn’t stay on the bed, though, since she had to go to the bathroom to brush her teeth and he apparently had the energy now to not let her leave his sight.  He brushed against her ankles where she stood in front of the sink, hopped in the bathtub, and started rolling around on the textured treads on the bottom of it.  That was why he was accompanying her.  He’d told her before that there was something sublime about the feeling of the bathtub treads specifically that he really couldn’t explain.  He didn’t feel that way about them in human form.  She didn’t care as long as he didn’t leave his fur in the tub, though she was often the one who cleared it out to take a shower anyway.  But it was worth it to see him being so happy in there.  When she left the bathroom, he followed, and she scooped him back onto the bed.  He curled up right next to her while she read her book for a bit.  After she turned out the light, he yipped along with her presleep prayer, and she gave him a last pet on the head before relaxing into the dark.
At the crack of dawn the sudden weight on the bed woke her.  In the light that sifted around the edges of the curtains she could see Ian, now fully human, getting under the covers.  He turned his back to her—he might not even remember that his transformation always woke her up—but she came over to him anyway, putting a hand on his side as she kissed his shoulder.  When he shifted onto his back, she kissed his scratchy cheek, then gave him a peck on the lips before leaning back on her elbow to look at him.  There was always something a little canine about him to her, but it was stronger when he’d just come back—the way he blinked at her like a sleepy dog melded with the way he still smelled of fur.  And it was his smell, because he smelled the same if she met him in the middle of the hallway, or raiding the fridge downstairs.  After he took a shower it would fade, but for now she breathed it deeply.  She could never explain it to anyone but him, but these were the hours when he smelled most like himself, like her Ian.    
His hand slipped into the curls at the back of her head, guiding her into a deeper kiss.  She wrapped an arm around his warm chest as he smoothed his other hand over her shoulder.  He kissed her a second time, then ever so gently pushed her away.  
“Okay, I’m sleeping now,” he said with a tired smile.
She caressed his cheek, then laid back on her side of the bed.  “Goodnight.”
RKW taglist: @jezifster @kk7-rbs @vacantgodling
Shifters taglist: @outpost51 @kk7-rbs
5 notes · View notes
alexcabotgf · 1 year ago
Text
this isn't a hot take by any means but a lot of you would be so much happier if you stopped having parasocial relationships with celebrities oh my god
10 notes · View notes
lord-squiggletits · 1 year ago
Text
It kinda sucks how Optimus Prime is a character who people (in real life) expect to be so Indubitably Good All The Time that they immediately shut down and refuse to acknowledge him whenever he does bad things or fucks up. Like I don't think I've seen any other character in this fandom get the same instantly negative reaction/never talk about him ever treatment that IDW Optimus gets.
Like, it's either him being a cop or the annexation of Earth. But instead of actually engaging with the story and going "so how does being a cop affect the way he treats and is treated by others" or "what led Optimus to annex Earth and how is this a reflection of his ultimately heroic ideal to treat organics as equal to Cybertronians despite the historical racism of his species"
people just instantly shut down and go "oh he's an asshole, he's stupid, he's not my Optimus, he's a bastard, he's edgy" etc etc and refuse to even like fuckin talk about him
It's so incredibly childish lmao especially when the IDW1 continuity in particular is already rife with characters who are also assholes that do stupid/regrettable things but people have no problems talking about/analyzing their stories.
My kingdom for a fandom that's willing to talk about IDW Optimus without immediately shutting down and just going "he's bad he's a bastard he sucks"
18 notes · View notes
laugtherhyena · 11 months ago
Text
Csm thoughts,,
#Putting these in tags cuz they're rather negative and like this people can ignore this if it shows up on search#anyways today i was showering and had a realization that like#if csm part 2 didn't exist and the manga had ended in chapter 97 i really wouldn't mind that. like at all#because so far there hasn't been anything in part 2 that stuck to me in such a way that i would be upset or miss it if it didn't exist#be it arcs world building (not big on religious allegories. that prophecy stuff really doesn't intrest me at all) or characters#in fact if it did end on the publig safety saga i probably would have liked it better#because then it would have ended and that's it. because part 2 exists i can see the story move foward#with the absence of almost everyone from part 1 and i just. miss them#so reading part 2 in general makes me inherently a little sad#and i feel like that's what blocks me from enjoying it or even growing to care for the new characters from part 2#because i don't care for any of them that much. not even asa and yoru#and this isn't me being mad at the story for killing people off. i think all deaths in part 1 happened exactly where they needed to#and the story is beautifully crafted. i just genuinely miss them#and see denji staggering about looking so tired all the time barely looking like the same guy from part one due to everything that happened#that also makes me fell just. like this pain in my chest that i can't even explain well#i don't dislike part 2 i don't think it's bad#it's just not for me and i don't think that will change anytime soon#tho i will still look up the new chapters because i wanna see what happens. tho if there ever is a part 3 i doubt i will bother reading it#hyena ramblings#rant? i guess?
3 notes · View notes
qilinkisser · 12 days ago
Text
walks in holding a giant ass sign that says "BEING CUPIOROMANTIC IS LONELY AS FUCK I'M GONNA BURN A BUILDING DOWN"
0 notes
daxite · 2 months ago
Text
yeah i think i've fully come to terms with the fact that i'm 100% somewhere on the ace spectrum lol
#dax rambles#i'm still absolutely bi but i'm just so fucking indifferent towards sex and relationship shit 90% of the time#i have attraction towards whatever gender but i don't even really consider it or think about it -- granted there is stuff i'm attracted to#i do like many various masculine & feminine features etc -- but ultimately it's just like i'm attracted to who i'm attracted to lol#but i really don't give much of a shit about sex itself really outside of when i'm in gooner mode and even then i only really care about#my weird fetishes/kinks LMAO#and relationship-wise it's the same though yeah i still want a relationship and have a possible crush on someone -- though that could be a#rebound thing since i went through a pretty rough breakup earlier this year + there's some other stuff so i doubt i'll act on it -- but#when it comes to relationships in general like in media and shit i really do not care honestly aside from a small handful of exceptions lol#like i still see so many people talking about shipping constantly here and i'm realising how truly little i give a shit about any#of that kind of stuff LMAO like more power to you but yeah it's never been something i'm that interested in at all aside from a small#handful of ships i like but honestly that's more of a lesser point#i just have zero interest in romance outside of what my own relationships would be i guess is the best way to put it#and i know i could never ever ever be in a relationship with someone who i haven't at least known as a friend for a good few years prior#like no fucking way lmao i need that established level of trust and bond + chemistry but i've literally never developed a crush on someone#outside of friends anyway so lmao and by crush i do mean someone who i would want to try a relationship with not just#“i'm attracted to this person” when it comes to attraction it's whatever and even with that it's very much a “damn they're hot would” and#that's about it lol it's not really super often either which is another main reason why i'm pretty confident i'm asexual to a degree#i think it was something i was in denial about for a while because i'm very happy with & enjoy being bisexual but either way i am still bi#it's just that the way i'm attracted to people & have little interest in sex itself is additionally some type of asexual experience lol#i'll probably delete this later unless i forgor i don't really give a shit though lmao
0 notes
dredshirtroberts · 7 months ago
Text
y'know. i don't often hate the way my brain is and how difficult it makes certain things for me.
i do a little today though.
#i'm probably going to feel this way the rest of the week#got some Stressful Stuff on my plate - none of it is world ending no matter what my brain thinks#but it's stressful and needs to get done#we already took care of One of the big major things just today because i was having a breakdown about it#because peeks threw up on my favorite shirt after having thrown up all over my bed yesterday and i'm like#she does this when there's a lot of change and stress going on and we've just moved and also we're attempting peace negotiations between he#and Solaire and it's. y'know. hampered by the fact that she's poorly socialized and both of them are dumb as rocks#and so she's stressed out because of the myriad of changes happening to her#and i'm stressed out because she's stressed out PLUS all the other bureaucratic nonsense i have in my brain#AND there's external stress in my foundkin (we're workshopping ways i can integrate the Family Label to apply to folks who weren't terrible#to me when i was a child) and it's just like#i had a really good day yesterday#i've been having pretty good days in general and i knew the crash would come and i knew that i'd get stressed about these things to the max#and that's. like. I know the science and paths behind how we got here#but i also hate that i'm here in this mindset with these things and i also cannot do the laundry myself after all#first because stairs are not always conquerable (they are Exceptionally Not For Me as of yesterday to the point where i'm going to have to#limit myself to the bathroom that doesn't have 2 stairs down to it even if it's closer in the moment)#and second because i ABHOR the texture of tide pods but i cannot deny that they are useful and so much easier to use/keep tidy#than a jug of Cleaning Goo is#so like. i'm embarrassed that all my bedding needs washing and i'm embarrassed that my shirt needs washing#and i'm embarrassed that i make dirty clothes in general and i *am* getting over that#it's slow but the fact that physically laundry is not a task i can complete on the wet side of things#(i still really enjoy the process of folding and sorting though i don't get around to it quickly)#but like. this is one of the reasons why i get freaked out about the fact that i create laundry that needs doing#even if it's not actually my fault (i'm trying very hard to remember it's not my fault the cat threw up on my clothes#and them being put away would have meant she probably would have thrown up on something else that needed to be cleaned#like the bed for example - i cannot put my whole bed away so she doesn't throw up on it)#becuase i feel like i'm burdening someone else to do a whole bunch of work for *me* and i can't do anything in return#(as if i haven't been very deliberately trying to keep up with the dishes daily this whole week so i don't feel like i contribute nothing t#the household)
1 note · View note
brokenrobot2004 · 8 months ago
Text
It makes me a little sad that I'm going to be convicted forever by the hate blog my ex best friend made about me years ago now; to her, the drama ended with that blog, but to me, it's going to stay forever as long as it's around, because it's one of the first things anyone is going to see when they look me up; I'd be more accepting of it if it wasn't also loosely comprised of buzzwords (Biphobic and ablest are specifically strange to me because I'm bi and diagnosed with autism, and even back when I was aroace I never said anything about bisexuals? I never said anything about any kind of disability either, I was always very respectful about both of those things and have even considered myself bi before now too, when I was 11) and mildly sexualized assumptions that an adult made of posts I made when I was either 10 or 11 years old in the furby community, just trying to fit in with what other people were saying but not entirely having a grip on what they meant and sounding off, when I never meant to sound the way I did at all; like how "Fetishizing trans women" was a post where I angrily mocked my mom calling me cute or girly things because I was a trans guy and found it upsetting, "disabled furby fetish" was me trying to make a positivity post about helping disabled furbies to be inclusive like everyone else was being, one of the things happened to be me saying I'd help a furby who couldn't walk sit on the toilet because I heard around that people taking care of the elderly would do that, so I included it in my post to seem knowledgeable on real ways of helping, and that was it; I really really wish that even while I was an unhinged young teenager, people would have just gently asked before writing those ever-lasting posts, "Hey, did you mean bla-bla-bla when you said this, or did you mean something else?" and I would've answered honestly, I'm sure; I was a bit of a monstrosity the further back you go into history of how I acted on the internet but I was really, not all that terrible to talk to when there was no perceived threat from the person and asking me a rational question would've been easy, I never ever mean to hurt anybody, but now, that's all people are going to think of me; even in real life, because who wouldn't look up my social media in this digital era? 🙁
And it was mostly, if not entirely, consisting of behaviors and views I've grown out of since the 5+ years ago it happened; I have even been met with backlash in 2022 or 2023, for saying I'm sorry to someone I was mean to back then 😯 (I now think that was unnecessary from me, I was very tired that day) what do the people who've cancelled me want from me? I don't think they want me to apologize, or care that I've gotten so much better since then; I think maybe they just want to revel in that I am a complete recluse now socially, a coward; I cannot even say "Cool fursuit!" or "I like your artstyle!" without feeling like somehow, someone will come forward and be able to twist what I've said into something terrible and use it against me if they don't like me, because that's just how people can be online now; it's terrifying. My ex best friend has shunned me behind my back for being so scared, I remember being shown longer ago; but knowing the things that upset her, she would be absolutely broken if someone did to her, what she did to me online; because that shit can ruin careers, it could ruin my chance of ever making a friend again, even IRL because anyone can look me up online; imagine doing that to somebody who was at the time, not even old enough to drink.
I've been called vile, irredeemable, and anonymously told to kill myself once even; I was a 16 year old; a rather air-headed one too yet. Who would talk that way to a 16 year old who made it clear he was trying to improve and never meant to hurt anyone? Who knew he was in the wrong and was trying his hardest to fix it? For young readers rolling their eyes, how absurd that is will click when you're older and realize how inexperienced most people are at that age.
And that isn't keeping in mind how developmentally delayed I always have been too, which I state as a fact and not as an excuse; I don't let it ever stop me from improving myself either, but I feel like it's probably important that I mention that about myself here; I've always been considerably far behind people my age socially and often, intellectually; it was very visible at School especially where alot of the work I did was far behind everyone else's, and was alot slower than them too, and when I was younger I'd hardly get any work done at all even and was very difficult to deal with as a whole; Autism can be a very unflattering disability, it's not generally pure or wholesome, and it has influenced my bad or otherwise embarrassing behavior alot in the past; which I will still take responsibility for; because my illness isn't some seperate entity from me I'd use as an excuse, I just want it to be understood and recognized that I can't function as well as most other people in the head, I never could, and I genuinely just want that to be understood coming from someone who is seriously, detrimentally autistic to a point I had gotten diagnosed with it at a young age; my past outbursts and socially-inept behaviors helped by it gave the internet ridiculous shitshows to point at, and I'll never be able to take that away; what I can do is hope that I'll be atleast somewhat understood in the end, and left alone for how I was such a long time ago now
I've made a good effort to no longer be that way or act immature and freak out like I did long ago, and I can't stop persuing a social presence at such a young age, over the idea that strangers might not understand that about me.
I have no respect for people who think call-out and purity culture are okay and useful towards youth; this stuff was meant for use against megacorperations and rich celebrities that are getting boycotted for being generally harmful and/or gross on a huge scale that affects many innocent people, not stupid teenagers like I was, or even young adults. People learn, grow, and change; I spend and have spent every second of my life finding ways to grow and improve, and taking information in from people I look up to and admire to do so; and came far enough that I am 100% no longer the petty, angry, and immature person I was at the time, and that makes me very proud. I am no longer going to cower in my little corner, shivering at the thought of complimenting someone's 3D model or uploading a piece of music on YouTube; because people who told a scared and confused autistic kid to end his life and tried to take future careers, friendships, or even love away from him with things he's said and done years and years ago, do not deserve my compliance anymore
#Also did that blog ever mention me making alts? I don't remember but if it did‚ I wanna say that I literally did that because (continued)#my ex best friend showed me that she was doing it in a video call when we were friends and I admired and copied her methods#That's why I also tried to cancel her when I didn't really vibe with her anymore because I thought I had to do that to end a friendship#I didn't know that I could just not vibe with someone anymore‚ that's how our fight started really; because I didn't know how (continued)#to make that decision properly and kept struggling; my to-be girlfriend later on really helped me figure out (continued)#how to handle ending a friendship properly#And SO MANY other things honestly?? I really owe it to my girlfriend; while my ass was getting ripped off‚ she calmly told (continued)#me what I wasn't approaching properly and with understanding and care; I was actually extremely annoying when we were first talking#but she tolerated me so much that I really grew close to her and bonded with her and we eventually became best friends and then#we became girlfriend and boyfriend and uhh.. What was I talking about again sorry-#Back to me learning something bad from my ex best friend though I also want to say that I'm not saying that to condemn her either.#I was just in a bad online space in general at the time because call-out culture and stuff was just getting big and I didn't (continued)#understand what it was or how bad it can be yet; some people don't care or even actively enjoy it though and I can't change them so‚#I focus on changing myself; like I always do#Or like maybe I can change them but it's not my responsibility- you know what I mean!!
0 notes
astrobydalia · 3 months ago
Text
Summer fling❤️‍🔥
Relatioship observations
work by astrobydalia
Tumblr media
❤️‍🔥 A thing about Virgo Venus is that since this is Venus’ fall they tend to be socially awkward or have struggles reading the room. The type to make jokes or remarks that are a bit too direct and low-key break the mood. They tend to behave in ways that comes across as robotic or dry
❤️‍🔥 A similar thing happens with Scorpio/Aries Venus too (venus is debilitated here as well) they tend to behave in ways that breaks social harmony by being a little too bold or even scandalous (Examples of this energy: Marilyn Monroe, Doja Cat)
❤️‍🔥In general, unless the rest of the chart says otherwise, debilitated Venus positions gives the native low charisma and lower ability to blend in socially. Their demeanor tends to be too forward or rub people the wrong way.
❤️‍🔥What is up with Leo placements and becoming romantically obsessed with people that reject them? Either that or they enjoy perusing people who they "shouldn't" be with like authority figures or someone that is way out of their league
❤️‍🔥Just like Jupiter in a woman's chart tells you how her husband will be, I feel like Jupiter in man's chart will tell you what kind of husband he'll be to be honest
​❤️‍🔥​ Whenever I had Vertex in the 5th house of a Solar Return, romance was a significant thing during those years!! However it was always flings, situationships and stuff like that. The sign with gives more nuance like one year I had it in Sagittarius and I had a fleeting romance with a foreigner
❤️‍🔥 With debilitated moon (Capricorn/Scorpio Moon) I've noticed these natives tend to believe or feel like love is conditional. Things like loyalty, trust and care are earned and come with a price or you have to jump thorough endless hoops first in order to get them. They refuse to be vulnerable so they expect the other person to show their cards first and then MAYBE if you earn their trust they'll open up too but good luck with that LMAO.
❤️‍🔥 That being said, I noticed men with Capricorn/Scorpio Moon tend to marry a woman that is very self-righteous and controlling. Their choice for a life partner tends to be... yikes
❤️‍🔥 Capricorn/Scorpio Moon can be the type to be skeptical of the idea of true love. The difference is Scorpio Moons are most likely to convert into the lovey-dovey train once they find their person cause being water sign deep down they crave that intimacy. However Capricorn Moons are most likely to freeze their heart out even when their soulmate is right in front of them, unfortunately the more time passes the more cap moons tend to harden their hearts
❤️‍🔥 Scorpio Moon’s greatest fear is to be alone I’ve noticed. And yeah nobody wants that but trust me for Scorpio Moon this is a HUGE thing. When I say they crave intimacy I mean they CRAVE intimacy. If they could hot glue their loved ones to their body so they’re connected to them for life like siamese twins, they would.
❤️‍🔥 Taurus Moons are just as obsessive and sexual as scorpio moons, literally copy paste. They can also be just as toxic when underdeveloped. The difference is taurus moons are more nurturing and if they don't want you to leave they'll create a paradise or "golden cage" for you (vs Scorpio moons who tend to resort to emotional or mind games for this purpose). I was also surprised to discover how needy taurus moons become once they like you?? Idk how to explain it but it's like they wanna insert you in every aspect of their lives and low-key gatekeep you LMAO. On the other hand Scorpio Moons will push you away and play cat and mouse for a while if they see themselves catching feelings
❤️‍🔥In my opinion both moons (Scorpio and taurus) tend to seek possessiveness or control in their relationships and they usually have the upper hand or the most power I've noticed
❤️‍🔥Praying for gen z babies born under Scorpio Venus cause a lot of them have that placement square Aquarius Neptune and that combo is.... ooof. Romanticizing toxic delusional love that brainwashes the shit out of them YALL NEED TO WAKE THE FUCK UP
Tumblr media
❤️‍🔥 When someone has their planets in your 12th house sign you have a fogged perception of this person, you tend to idolize them cause there are parts of them that you're blind to. However this person will feel confident in knowing your psyche as well as the unconscious motives behind your actions. This person has a knack to naturally know how to appeal to unconscious desires or fears you weren't even aware you had. For this reason you'll find this person either triggering and scary OR very addictive cause it almost feels like they penetrate your soul
❤️‍🔥 With that being said, people with planets in your 12th house are the best therapists for you or best people to vent to. Water houses in general can apply, but I feel like 12th house is better for this cause it rules over spiritual and emotional healing/cleansing specifically. This person can help you untangle your unconscious and you can feel sooooo much relief after talking or being with them. This will only apply if you trust them and they have good intentions ofc, otherwise they'll actually feed into your unconscious fears and make them worse
❤️‍🔥 People with placements on your 8th house secretly dislike and/or envy you, but still feel the need to be close with you cause they low-key wanna tear you down, wanna see you fail, wanna keep taps on you to make sure aren't too successful. I've seen SOOOOO many toxic fake friendships with this synastry... Although I've previously talked about positive manifestations of this overlay too, frankly this dynamic is what I've observed for the most part with this synastry if im honest with you
❤️‍🔥 I totally agree with @zeldasnotes when she said 8th house synastry is only good/tolerable when there’s mutual sexual attraction between the two, otherwise it’s annoying af. I believe this is because the two people can easily use sex to release all the intensity and tension between them instead of letting it build up or channeling it through toxic emotions like envy
❤️‍🔥 Okay but have you ever been genuinely loved by an Aries placement? When their heart is in it, they'll have unshakable loyalty. They’d move mountains for you, kill and fight for you. They are THE ride or dies
❤️‍🔥 A thing that I've seen a lot with women who have debilitated Jupiter (Virgo, Gemini, Capricorn) is that they have a husband that prioritized his work over their marriage/family. The husband is often away due to work or duties or just emotionally unavailable in general. These women tend to give up something about their life after marriage because they had to accommodate to their husband's life style, like if she has to move or give up her own job to be with him she will. For example: Grace Kelly (Gemini Jupiter) who quit acting after marring the prince of Monaco. Hailey Bieber (Capricorn Jupiter) who was exposed to a lot more public attention after marrying Justin and she said herself she's had to learn to adapt that being new part of her life now
❤️‍🔥 Another big thing I've seen with Saturn influence in the 7th house is that your spouse will have big, BIG ambitions. People only talk about Jupiter or Venus but to be real with you, Saturn is an underrated indicator for your spouse being wealthy. This placement indicates that your spouse is stablished, successful and can easily provide stability for you. All the people I've seen with this placement married someone who had a business!!!!, their own house, a successful career, a household name, a higher position, etc
What I mean by Saturn influence on the 7th (for both Vedic and Tropical): Saturn in the 7th house Capricorn or Aquarius DSC 7th ruler in the 10th house (also maybe 11th house) or vice versa Saturn darakarka
❤️‍🔥 Mars-Pluto aspects definitely will make someone have pretty extreme kinks
❤️‍🔥 I’ve seen this a lot in Pisces Moons and Aries Moons that they low-key wanna be babied in a relationship or they subconsciously end up being the one who’s more coddled and taken care of by their partner
❤️‍🔥 Aries and Gemini placements in the composite chart is indicative of a relationship that likely won't last long-term. I've seen this placement in long lasting marriages too but their relationships gave off fling vibes, really playful, they type where people said they wouldn't last
❤️‍🔥 I’ve seen Saturn in the 7th house synastry manifesting as the opposite of commitment. The Saturn person blocks off the possibility of having a committed relationship with the house person and the house person feels abandoned
❤️‍🔥 With that being said Saturn in synastry/composite can indicate rejection in that area and things one or both parties will deprive the other of or deny them. For example Saturn in the 8th synastry/composite can mean one person refused to have sex with the other or there are many conditions and restrictions in the sex life of both
❤️‍🔥 Aquarius and Capricorn Mars/Venus are SO good at hiding their attraction from you. They'll watch from afar for some time before making some move meanwhile you'll be clueless of their interest
❤️‍🔥 Moon square Neptune is an aspect that makes someone emotionally insecure, the type to need constant reassurance that you still love them. Can also be emotionally manipulative in very subtle almost undetectable ways
❤️‍🔥 Earth Venus find it very easy to engage in casual dating/hook up culture because they know how to not get too attached. They have a hyper awareness of what purpose a certain relationship is serving them at the moment so they act accordingly
❤️‍🔥 On the other hand I’ve noticed Air Venus natives have a tendency to play around because they know they get the ick quickly. But it's all fun and games until they end up catching feelings accidentally 😭
❤️‍🔥 My experience having Gemini Jupiter in the 7th house: Yes all my suitors/dates have been foreigners but the cultural difference was never that big. They usually came from a country close to mine or their cultural background was very similar from mine
Tumblr media
work by astrobydalia
2K notes · View notes
ailesswhumptober · 4 months ago
Text
Prompts for AI-less Whumptober 2024
As promised, we're bringing you the official prompt list of AI-less Whumptober 2024 today!
We have 31 days of excellent whump prompts, with three prompts per day to pick from, fun themes, and 10 alt prompts to play around with. We hope you enjoy! Additional info + plain text versions of the prompts can be found under the cut.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
FAQ and Rules
What sort of content can I create for this event?
You can create whatever you want (fic, art, edits, etc). Any fandom is allowed, as well as OC stuff. NSFW is allowed, but please tag your content accordingly! The only thing not allowed is AI-generated content.
Do I need to make 31 things to participate?
Oh heavens no! You can make as much or as little content as you like, skip days when desired, or combine prompts (so for example, write something that covers a prompt from day 1, 2, AND 3). You don't have to do the days in order either, go wild! To be considered a 'completionist', you only have to make sure that at the end of the month, you've covered 31 prompts from 31 different days, but whether you do that in 31 works or just 1 is up to you.
What are these alts about?
If none of the three prompts of a particular day are your cup of tea, you can swap them out for an alt prompt of your choice.
What are these themes about?
Just a little bit of extra fun for the mods. Like last year, we'll be handing out various badges for people participating in the event. A full list can be found here, perhaps there is a special badge or two for people who can't be completionists but who do manage to finish every single day of a specific theme ;)
How do I tag and is there an AO3 collection?
It suffices to tag your work with #ailesswhumptober for us to see and reblog it! Please also tag nsfw, since we'll be using that tag too. Tagging the day is optional but does help the mods along.
There is an AO3 collection to add your fics to here.
That should be all. If you have any additional questions, check our pinned or hit us up in the ask box. Or join our discord maybe, whumping can be a great group activity!
---
Plain text versions of the prompts:
October 1 - Torture Tuesday
public torture/public use, stress position, “If you cry, we’ll go easy on you.”
October 2 - Whumperless Wednesday
Unfortunate fall, car accident, “Don’t move. You’ll be okay.”
October 3 - Trauma Thursday
Shared trauma, survivor’s guilt, “It’s not your fault.”
October 4 - Fright/Freaky Friday
Painful transformation, non-consensual body modifications, “You’re a monster.”
October 5 - Sensory Saturday
Overstimulation, migraines, “I can’t take this anymore.”
October 6 - Surprise Sunday
Multiple whumpees, self sacrifice, “I’m the only one who can do this.”
October 7 - Medical Monday
Field medicine, running out of supplies, “Hold on, we’re going to have to improvise.”
October 8 - Torture Tuesday
Rope burns, gagged, “You’re so much prettier this way.”
October 9 - Whumperless Wednesday
Hypothermia, heatstroke, “You look pretty pale.”
October 10 - Trauma Thursday
Self worth issues, pushing away a loved one, “You don't need to earn this.”
October 11 - Fright/Freaky Friday
Hallucinations, truth serum, “Why would you even say that?”
October 12 - Sensory Saturday
Isolation, sensory deprivation, “Can you feel me? I’m right here, whumpee.”
October 13 - Surprise Sunday
Whumpee using themself as bait, defiance, “Take me instead.”
October 14 - Medical Monday
Seizures, concussion, “See if you can follow my finger with your eyes.”
October 15 - Torture Tuesday
Waterboarding, removing body parts, “Don’t break down on me yet.”
October 16 - Whumperless Wednesday
Drowning, hostile environment, “I don’t know how anybody could survive that.”
October 17 - Trauma Thursday
Abandonment, misunderstanding, “Why did I even think you cared?”
October 18 - Fright/Freaky Friday
Mind control, possession, “Everybody will end up despising you.”
October 19 - Sensory Saturday
Disassociation, losing a sense, “I wish I could get you back.”
October 20 - Surprise Sunday
Enemy/Stranger to caretaker, accidental de-aging, “I’m absolutely not qualified for this shit.”
October 21 - Medical Monday
Drugged, ambulance ride, “This will make you feel better, okay?”
October 22 - Torture Tuesday
Forced (to kneel/watch/hurt somebody else), whipped, “Do not look away.” October 23 - Whumperless Wednesday
Fever, passing out, “Hey?! Stay with me, okay?!”
October 24 - Trauma Thursday
Deconditioning, relapse, “It’s normal that you need more time.”
October 25 - Fright/Freaky Friday
Humiliation, betrayal, “How could you?!”
October 26 - Sensory Saturday
Electrocution, burning, “This is going to sting.”
October 27 - Surprise Sunday
Before vs after, Alternate universe, “Well, there’s a first for everything.”
October 28 - Medical Monday
Internal bleeding, needles and stitches, “I didn’t think the wound was that bad…”
October 29 - Torture Tuesday
Ownership, branding, “Everybody will know that you’re mine.”
October 30 - Whumperless Wednesday
Poison, delirium, “You’re not making sense.”
October 31 - Trauma Thursday
Panic attack, facing a phobia, “You need to get out of here!”
Alt prompts:
1) Pistol whipped
2) Co-dependency
3) Animal bite
4) Zombies
5) White room torture
6) Shock collar
7) Pulling teeth
8) Kidnapping
9) “You always make everything worse!”
10) “If you weren’t around, I’d be long dead by now...”
2K notes · View notes