#i forgot about it but my mom had this machine she used when she slept for a little bit and it required distilled water

[livefromtheyard]

i’m sorry about your sinuses :( have you tried a netipot? i’m prone to sinus infections and it’s a life saver -📏

💞 we have a neti pot but i am afraid of it so 💔 i've just been taking painkillers to make my sinuses calm down and it kind of worked 🙇‍♂️ and i've been drinking an insane amount of water. really my sinuses are only a problem at night so as long as i can keep the sun from setting i'm good

[badgirlcovenrep]

The Goddess' Blessing (of a daughter)

Chapter One

(NOTES: the raylla adopts Tiffany fic everyone's been asking for

this is going on AO3 once I get home from my sister's but I wanted to post here first. If you'd rather read it there follow me and I'll post once it's officially in there.

Obs: Tiffany is six in this. Mostly because I wanted to write our witch moms carrying their baby and canonically she's like ten so..... and she's also like severely traumatized. We'll get to the healing soon enough though.

+ Edwin is the best papa. And Scylla has p much already adopted this kid, she just doesn't know it yet.

It's half past six p.m when their train screeches to a halt at the Chippewa station. In all the chaos of the last couple of weeks, Scylla hadn't realized Yule was well on it's way. It is still mid November, but the station has been prematurely decked in civilian Christmas decorations, and almost every wall and corner twinkles in golden speckles and fake pine.

Tiffany had been dozing in and out of sleep on the bench next to her, holding tight to her stuffed parrot as well as Scylla's coat sleeve with her restless small hands that spasmed in pure energy even as she slept. Since coming back from Nicte's mission, Scylla had been in a frenzy to get everything ready for their trip, and Tiffany had followed her around the (no longer safe) safe house, clinging on to her attention with wide blue eyes. She'd always liked kids. Before everything happened Scylla even used to babysit for dodger families.

It was never a lot of money, but she appreciated the levity and humor kids carried. They had hope Scylla prayed she could one day get back. Hope that could only come from the fleeting innocence of childhood. But even then, Tiffany was special, she still had all those wonderful, bright things, and she carried them in bulk, spilling out of her tiny little hands for anyone to see.

Yet she was also touched by things so horrible Scylla sometimes shuddered awake in the dead of night, when her mind conjured up terrible nightmares of being in her place. Of being squeezed into a tiny cage, fed dog food, strung up on a stage as masked psychopaths snickered and passed around stones bigger than fists. It showed, sometimes, in how every once in a while her expression became somber and reserved. How she stopped mid-sentence, and Scylla could see the glint of tears in the corners of her eyes.

It reminded her of Raelle - Raelle, who'd sat in her bed just yesterday and snacked on the stupid expensive popcorn her mother had bought - Raelle, who also carried so much darkness behind her strong, steady demeanor - those were the parts of her Scylla couldn't help but want to protect, and as a result, those feelings also extended to Tiffany. Scylla lost a lot of people in her life, and she'd decided the day she found the child's parents that she would do whatever it took to keep her safe. Just like she wished someone might have done for her. Because that sort of hidden, desolate pain could just as well transform itself into something entirely awful if exploited the right way.

People around her start getting up from their seats, reaching to the compartments for their luggage, there aren't many of them making their way up North this time of year but they still fill the cart in humming conversations, deciding on what to do next or where to get dinner. Scylla takes this as her cue to skim her fingers through Tiffany's hair, gently nudging her awake, "Hey, T, wake up, we're here."

The little girl sits up, bleary eyed, and yawns, looking around at the commotion, "it's already Christmas?" She asks, catching a glimpse of the boisterous decorations set up outside.

"Not yet, no." Scylla chuckles, getting up from her seat to retrieve their own bags - they had everything the two could think to bring, and yet were still not much. A duffel bag for Scylla and purple backpack for Tiffany, with unicorn stickers and colorful buttons sewn to the front. Scylla had retrieved it, along with some toys and clothes, from the girl's home, "People just love decorating early."

"Oh." Tiffany quips, as Scylla helps her fit her arms into the straps of her backpack, then takes her hand in a steady grip once they are done, pulling the young girl towards the door to leave the train, "The lights are pretty!" She exclaims happily, blinking in wide eyed wonder.

Outside, November has definitely made itself known, and Scylla is glad they are both warm in their coats as the wind bites her cheeks until they turn a dark blush. She looks around for Edwin, not sure she'll recognize him from the pictures she'd seen Willa scatter around the house, but still willing to try.

For a second, in that moment, she thinks this might not have been a good idea. When Scylla agreed to it, she'd admittedly not been in her full faculties, brain too preoccupied with seeing Raelle again after so long to completely comprehend what she'd been offered.

After everything that happened, she can't help but be a little nervous to meet the father of her ex (?), the same girl she still very much loved. The girl who had run back to her in that dark forest a day before and clung onto her face until all they could breathe was each other.

If she thought too much about it, Scylla could still feel the soft, almost painful impact of her lips as Raelle knocked her off her balance and breathed fire into her chest like molten lava. It'd been so long, she almost forgot the kind of power Raelle had when she kissed. Like she was always on the verge of tasting your very soul. Their whole day back together before was so very delicate and tentative, air fizzling with electricity like the tension of a bow, pulled tight with an arrow ready to shoot.

The time they've been separated her heart was squeezed tight under an elastic band. Whenever she stopped to think, even for a minute, she could feel it taught, so very strained, reaching from the very inside of her ribs. It was there from the very start. The tightness was what propelled her diaphragm into breathing Raelle in that very first night they spent together, even if she knew she shouldn't, and then, it was what kept them orbiting around each other like their very own solar system. Never too far apart. Always wishing to be closer.

When they kissed in the clearing, hairs messy with the wild strumming of the bat just a few feet away, for the first time, she felt like the band released. The invisible string, so very tight, loosening from under her heart to extend around the both of them and wrap them in what Scylla could only describe as exhilarating, shaking relief. The touch of Raelle's cotton gloves, that she never thought she'd feel again - the taste of her lips, like blood and rain droplets and a mouthful of just her.

It left Scylla running on a high since she walked away from Raelle just the day before, in the early hours of the morning.

It's not how she hoped she'd meet Raelle's dad. Deep down, no matter how much she tried not to, Scylla had imagined herself, more than once, coming to the Cession hand in hand with the blonde fixer. In love and together, going home to meet the parents. It's bittersweet to be here with Tiffany instead, and she has to squeeze the young witch's hand slightly to ground herself from the urge to run.

To just take the child's small body in her arms and run- leave the station in lieu of a cheap motel, one with vending machines, where they could hide from the world a little longer.

When the witch looks down, however, Tiffany smiles reassuringly back at her, squeezing her hand slightly in return, and Scylla can't help the wave of affection that washes over her.

"Excuse me? Are you Scylla and Tiffany?" A voice coming from behind wakes them back from the moment, and when they turn, both come face to face with Edwin Collar.

Scylla's sure it's him. If not because he does still look quite a lot like the pictures she's seen, then because the necromancer can definitely see the telltale signs of Raelle written all over his face. It's mostly there in the kind drop of his eyelids, and the way his mouth creates tiny wrinkles of soft skin when he smiles, but it's there, nonetheless.

"Yes, we are, nice to meet you, Mr. Collar." Scylla greets, settling down her bag to shake his hand.

"Of course, it's amazing to finally meet you. Raelle talked you up a storm," he declares, chuckling proudly, "only good things, I assure."

"Oh, I'm sure I don't deserve that." She let's out, hoping it sounded more playful than it feels for her.

"Nonsense. You seem like a kind girl." The man decides, with a solemn nod, before turning to Tiffany, "and you- Tiffany, I'm very happy to have you with me this week as well, I'm sure we'll have lots of fun together."

"Thank you, Mr. Collar." The small blonde replies, half-hiding herself behind Scylla's pant leg.

"Let's go then. It's getting cold." Edwin finally declares, taking Scylla's bag from the floor without a question. The girl goes to complain, but he cuts her off before she can - "and don't fight me on this. Raelle also never let's me carry her bags, for once I'd love to help."

Scylla still wants to protest. Mostly because she feels that they have already asked so much - and she doesn't quite deserve the kindness - but he seems sincere, so she nods instead, and with the affirmative, all three begin their way to the parking lot.

"Is Raelle your friend?" Tiffany asks innocently, skipping happily over her boots.

"Uh- she- yeah, I guess you could say that."

"Well, you said we were going to a friend's dad's house." Tiffany notes. "Where is Raelle then?"

"About that-" Edwin stops in his step, "did you see her? How is she?" He asks, an uneasy tension settling over his demeanor as he studies Scylla for answers, "they told me she was alive but that was it-"

"She's okay. I saw her yesterday, she was well." The brunette assures, and that seems to send a wave of relief over the man, who breathes deeply before continuing their walk along the various cars.

"Oh, thank goodness." He sighs, "when those people took her I thought- I'm so glad she's okay."

"Yeah. We were all worried." Scylla declares. And this, she can relate to. The way he cares so much for Raelle, it spills into the very movement of his expressions. It's familiar, and it warms her heart. She decides right then that she likes Edwin.

"Did the bad people take Raelle too?" Tiffany questions, frowning in scared surprise as they reach Edwin's old truck.

Scylla sighs, not having revealed much of the mission she'd gone on the day before. She knew it'd be scary for her. Tiffany was still very much traumatized, and rightfully so, after everything she'd been through. But Tiffany was also very smart- and observant. She'd catch up eventually and Scylla feels stupid for not dealing with this before coming.

"Yeah. They tried to hurt her, but me and her other friends didn't let them." The necromancer assures, as she helps the girl into the backseat and clicks in her seatbelt, "she's okay now. We're all safe here."

"Oh- Okay." Tiffany nods, but Scylla can see the doubt shining under her eyes.

Scylla wishes she knew what to say, but words fail her, so she squeezes the girl's hand reassuringly once more, winking in what she hopes is humorous solidarity, before closing the door.

***

Raelle's house is just like she imagines- small, rustic - surrounded by a thick canopy of trees and bushes. It reminds her of the places she used to stay with her parents, scattered over random cities all over the U.S. Scylla likes it.

"It isn't much, but we always have warm dinner and pancakes in the morning." Edwin quips, humbly, as he leads the pair of witches to Raelle's room, "you can stay here. Hope it is comfortable."

"This is more than enough, Edwin." Scylla smiles gratefully, "it's too much, really. Thank you for letting us stay."

"Nonsense." He waves his hand with a half embarrassed chuckle, "It's good to have people here again. After Rae and Tally left everything feels a lot quieter." Scylla nods in agreement, as the man turns to leave the room, the two witches inside watching him carefully, "You guys should change and rest a bit- I'll call you for dinner.

Scylla thanks him, and waits until the door clicks behind his back to turn her attention to the luggage that had been settled over a random chair. The room is filled with so much Raelle, she can't help but notice the letters, pictures, memories and song lyrics, glued to every single wall, from a time before Fort Salem, before them.

The blonde used to leave notes on her dorm walls back at Fort Salem. Lots of silly things like "I'll be back after training" or "You fight people in your sleep. It's cute.". Scylla wonders if they are still there or if they've been taken by the army when she was captured. It doesn't matter anymore, the necro realizes, and she shakes her head in an effort to bring her attention back to the room.

"You should put on some pajamas." Scylla says toward Tiffany, who sat, grievously quiet, at Raelle's bed.

She looked thoughtful, in a way regular six year olds don't quite show unless they have to go through way too much. Her small, bright eyes hide barely concealed darkness as she shifts her looks everywhere but at the older witch.

Scylla sighs, finding this place - this relationship - so very painfully familiar. She'd been the scared little girl last time, feeling so very small and alone. And now, as the adult, she was definitely going to try her best not to fuck it. As difficult as it might be. The world didn't need another suffering witch.

After a few minutes of silence, Scylla realizes she was not going to get an answer, so she opens the girl's backpack and fishes out a pair of mermaid themed leggings and t-shirt, along with the small bag that carried her tooth and hair brushes along with some other toiletries. Scylla places the items by Tiffany on the mattress, kneeling in front of the young witch and studying her clear, soft little face.

"Hey. Are you feeling alright?"

"Are the bad men coming here to hurt us?" Tiffany asks, instead of a response, and Scylla frowns in worry.

"No, of course no-"

"They came and took Raelle too." Tiffany notices, tears escaping from her eyelids that Scylla dries up with her thumb, "and they hurt Miss Willa, the other kids' at the office and my mommy and daddy. What if they come here again? What if they really hurt us this time?" As the questions stumble out of her mouth, sobs begin to wreck across her throat until she's shaking, ever so slightly, with the force of her tears and heavy, panicked breathing.

Scylla sighs and rises from the ground to cuddle the girl close to her chest, squeezing tight until she can feel Tiffany's little arms squeeze her back. Scylla's afraid too - most of the time, if she allowed herself to be honest - Ever since watching Raelle leave her in that cell the year before, the girl could feel even more perfectly the path of death and destruction that marked their (the witches') way through the world.

One of the bad things about being a necro - Death didn't like not being known, and it showed itself insistently, to anyone able to notice.

"We don't know whether or not they'll come again." Scylla ends up responding, sincerely, as she squeezes her arms even tighter around the little girl, "but I won't let them hurt you, you hear me? I dealt with them before, I can deal with them again."

"No" Tiffany shakes her head, frowning up at her in teary-eyed fear, "You too. You're safe too. I don't want you to get hurt either."

"Hey." Scylla forces out a chuckle, trying to lighten up the situation for the young witch's sake, "don't be silly, ok? I'm pretty much invincible."

Tiffany doesn't laugh, her breathing having somewhat returned to normal. The girl just stares back at Scylla with a seriousness that's all too unfair, coming from a six year old, and she reaches out, her pinky finger lifted in expectation, "Pinky promise you'll be safe too? Please?"

Scylla knows she shouldn't. The truth is, she doesn't know what will happen. After their plan to capture Nicte was said and done, Scylla barely had any idea what she would be doing now. But Tiffany obviously needs the reassurance, from the way she stares ever so desperately at the necro's face.

"Okay, I pinky promise." Scylla smiles, trying to convey some calm toward the other girl as she let her pinky link with the smaller one. It seems to work, as Tiffany's expression softens and her tense posture falls, "now let's get you under a shower and into some pajamas, ok? You're a very smelly little witch right now."

"Am not!" Tiffany replies, and Scylla can't help but full on laugh this time, pulling the small girl to Raelle's bathroom as she mockingly protests.

Second chapter is almost done, just needs to be read over for mistakes. For C2, Raelle calls home, Scylla meets old dodger friends and she also has an important conversation with Edwin.

Hope you guys enjoyed!

[nishiisenpai]

punch - tanaka ryūnosuke x reader

 REQUEST: “AHHHH ok so I'm irrationally angry rn and I do this thing where I punch my thighs so I don't accidentally commit a felony. I need some fluff so could you do any one of these boys (Tsukishima, Ushijima, or Tanaka,) seeing a f!reader doing the leg punchy? Any topic I just need some fluff 😅 Thanks - @italkmyselftosleep “

A/N: i chose tanaka cause he seemed to fit this more and relate to this request more too. i apologize that i wrote this so late because again, school was pretty terrible, but I hope this works :))) 

okay this was really cheesy, so i will warn you in advance, but thank you so much for being patient and here’s this request for you!!!

-

WARNING: Fluff!!! 

ADDITIONAL WARNING:  foul language will be added! and mentions of managing anger. (this request was made before my rules page got set up)

WHO:  Tanaka Ryūnosuke x Female Reader

-

Monday mornings are the worst. Let’s be honest. It was the starting of the week of school and it also could never start off right for anyone... Well for you that is. 

Your alarm rang loudly knocking you out of bed. 

“What time is it?” you cringed at the sound and the way your voice cracked. You squint your eyes while looking at your phone that stated 6:00 AM.

“5 more minutes.” as you stopped the alarm before turning to the other side of the bed.

The alarm rung 4 more times although you had slept past them all. The last one really shook you awake since the phone was right next to your ear.

“aH SHIT- I’m late!” as you pulled the covers off yourself but struggled to do so as you tossed and turned. You ran around your room scrambling to get your backpack ready while also dressing in the school uniform.

“Where is my vest?” as you searched through the piled up clothes at the foot of your bed. 

“Y/N! Hurry up! You’re going to be late!”

“I know! I’m sorry! I’m trying to look for my vest!”

“It’s in the wash, sorry hun!” your mom came in and threw in a different vest that was identical but had a small stain.

“It’s fine! Thanks for this one though!” you grabbed your stain remover stick and your backpack before fleeing to the bathroom to quickly rush your daily routine. You ran to the front door to put your shoes on in a hurry.

“Take this with you!” as your mom threw a sandwich at your head and you lurched forward. Turning around to pick up the bagged breakfast, thanked your mom before bolting out the door immediately and ran to school.

-

“Miss Y/N, you’re late to class.” as your teacher skimmed at your messy figure.

“Yes, I apologize for that, I can clean up the classroom after class to make up my tardiness.”

“Very well then, take a seat, we are on page 51 in the textbook.” You went to the back of your class and sat there placing your stuff down.

“Here’s the work sheet for today’s work.” your classmate who sat next to you said handing you the assignment.

“Thank you so much.”

“No worries... Oh, and uh Tanaka was looking for you earlier.”

“Wait- what? Do you know why?”

“Unsure, he didn’t say anything other than ask if you were here.”

“Oh okay, thanks. I’ll go find him later.”

Class continued and you barely managed to stay awake. It was bad that you had stayed up all night to play video games and you kind of beat yourself up for ruining your sleep schedule. But you as well didn’t regret it since you had just leveled up to a higher rank.

You yawned as you walked out of the classroom to go find Tanaka. He must have been with Noya though your assumption had completely disappeared when you heard yelling come your way.

“Y/N!!!!” your best friend Nishinoya came running towards you.

“Huh?” and you felt the sudden weight of Noya on your back. “Shit, when did you get so heavy?”

“Heavy?!?!?!” You laughed and shook your head while caring Noya.

“I was playing, chillllll.” 

“Mhm.” as he clung onto you still. You continued walking swaying your head side to side.

“Do you know where Tanaka is?”

“He was with me just a second ago.”

“So you ran off without him?”

“Yeah.” you smacked your forehead. “What?”

“You idiot, he’s probably trying to find you right now.”

“NISHINOYA!” Tanaka’s voice was heard somewhere on the right side of the building.

“AH SHIIIII” as Noya jumped off of your back and hid behind you. Tanaka came rounding the corner and saw you standing there in question.

“Hey babe, do you know where Nishinoya is?” you felt Noya tug on your shirt.

“Hm? Noya-san? No I haven’t, why?”

“He escaped Daichi’s meeting, and I had to bear with all the trouble he caused.”

“Oh really?” as you raised an eyebrow with an open smirk.

“Why do you look like that?”

“No reason... I will say, he might have went downstairs to the vending machines. He said he was hungry.”

“Alright, thanks babe.”

“You’re welcome.” as you saw Tanaka run down the stairs and you immediately pulled Noya’s arm from behind.

“You skipped Daichi’s meeting?!?!?”

“He was gonna yell at us!”

“Noya, that is irresponsible of you.”

“Well it was also irresponsible of you to lie to your boyfriend like that.”

“Hush- I don’t want to hear anything from you. Now you better go and run or I will drag you to Daichi myself.” Nishinoya shuddered in fear.

“Okay, fine. I will.” as Noya waved bye and you turned around and sighed.

“I forgot to ask Tanaka what he wanted earlier... I’ll just do it later.”

-

School continued and you again tried staying awake for them all. It was difficult knowing you lacked sleep which caused you to be cranky and irritated easily. Sometimes your fits would cause you to be annoying or angry. This lead you to act up more than you should have.

“Y/N, can you pass me those papers?”

“What do you want?”

“Uh, I was just asking if you could pass me those papers.”

“You literally can stand up and get it, I don’t know why you’re asking me.” you retorted back before putting your head back down on the desk.

“What the fuck?”

“I said what I said, so get up and get it. Geez...”

“Do you wanna fight or something?” your classmate raised her voice.

“Alright bet, let’s do it.” you turned to her annoyed.

“You asked for this.” as she stood up from her seat.

“Come at me bitch.” as you got up and stared at her.

“Ladies! Split it up! You both will be standing at the back of the class till the end of this period, and I do not want to hear a single word coming from both of your mouths.” Your teacher had spoken to both you and the girl as you guys headed to the back of the class and stood there.

The period carried on with you and this other classmate standing at the back of the classroom. This caused your irritation level to rise even more since your body was slowly breaking you down and begging you to lay down. 

“Alright, class dismissed. Miss Y/N, I need to have a word with you.” as your teacher insisted for you to come towards her.

“I heard that you are in the volleyball club as the manager.”

“Ah yes I am.”

“Although you are the manager, you must stay here after school for the clean up you had promised me earlier.”

“May I clean up another day? This practice is really important and I must be informed about it.”

“I’m sure the others will inform you about it later. Since it seemed that you were close with Nishinoya.”

“I am, but he’s-”

“I don’t want to hear it. You promised me, therefore you shall keep it and do it.”

“But promises can be broken.”

“Not this one, unless you’d like me to force you on cleaning duty tomorrow too.”

“No thank you.”

“Good, now get to it. The room doesn’t become sparkly clean by itself.” as your teacher grabbed her bag and left the classroom. You bowed to acknowledge her leave before heading to the chalkboard to write profanities all over the wall.

“Why the FUCK did I HAVE to play games past three!?!?!?” as you banged on the wall with your fist. You were angry at yourself. It pissed you off that your day already started bad with being late and the situation you had moments ago with that classmate of yours. It even made you frustrated at yourself that you couldn’t find Tanaka to ask what he needed of you. 

So many thoughts have rushed to your head as you walked to a desk to sit down. You had stopped hitting your fists against the chalkboard though that quickly switched to punching your thighs since you didn’t know where else to contain your anger. It was also a safer option than to accidently commit something dangerous.

After dealing with your anger, you started to clean the classroom. It was better to finish the job quicker and faster so that you would head to practice to see everyone in action. Especially Tanaka since he did mention how he practiced his serves and spikes recently.

-

Cleaning the classroom took less time than you thought. When music was being played through your headphones, you escaped the reality of cleaning and thought of wonders to help the process go by faster. This helped you calm down, though your body was aching.

You put away the cleaning supplies and rushed towards the stairs to head to the changing room in order to switch your sweaty and stained uniform into gym attire instead. You searched through your bag for deodorant and applied twice on each pit in order to securely and safely say your pits didn’t smell.

“Oh hey Y/N-san!” Hinata had shouted and you smiled.

“Hey there!” you waved back and walked to the bench towards Kiyoko.

“Hi Y/N, what took you so long?”

“I got put into cleaning duty.”

“I’m sorry to put this on you again, but you’re on cleaning duty tonight with some of the boys.”

“It’s okay, I can handle it.”

“Are you sure? I can stay back and do it instead since you’ve already done cleaning yesterday.”

“No no, it’s fine. Besides you have to study for your test tomorrow, no?”

“You’re right, but if you’d like I can-”

“Kiyoko-san, you need as much time as possible to study and get good grades. I know you are academically smart, though you like to do well, and staying behind with these rowdy boys is not what you need at the moment.” as you took off your jacket.

“WOOHOO! LOOK AT MY BEST FRIEND!!!” Noya hollered and you laughed while shaking your head.

“See.” you looked at Kiyoko before walking onto the court. ”Alright boys! Let’s start practicing on your serves!”

-

“Thank you for today’s practice!” as the boys bowed down to Coach Ukai.

“You already know what time it is. Go clean up and get home safe. Make sure to eat a well balanced meal and get lots of sleep, you hear me?”

“Yes sir!” as they all scrammed to different areas of the gym. Kiyoko had already left beforehand since there was an emergency she had to attend. Yachi was picking up her things before leaving and you waited behind for all of them to slowly leave one by one.

“Have a good night, Daichi, Sugawara and Asahi san.” as you waved them off and gave them a small smile.

“Make sure Kageyama and Hinata don’t stay back too late.” Daichi instructed.

“Understood. Good night to you three.”

“Good night, Y/N!” Sugawara said patting your head. You nodded listening to Sugawara.

“Good night, and stay safe Y/N.” Asahi said sending you a shy smile and you nodded again.

“I very much will, now move along. You guys need to be home soon.” As you turned your attention back to the boys and went to go toss the balls to them.

-

You had just locked the equipment room after cleaning the gym. Everyone had left, including Hinata and Kageyama who had to get Daichi to yell at the two to head home. The others went to change and you assumed they went home. This left you alone in the gym and no supervision.

Your body shook as the exhaustion and frustration you felt from earlier today started showing. You started getting angry and began punching your thighs. You would have slammed a volleyball but you forgot to have one saved for yourself.

The punching started getting aggressively harder and faster. You didn’t keep track of your surroundings as you only paid attention of releasing your anger through punching yourself.

“Babe! What are you still doing here??? I thought you already left.” Tanaka yawned as he walked closer to you. No response.

“Baby?” Tanaka neared closer to you. He heard the sound of skin smacking.

“Y/N?” As Tanaka stood behind you and took a full look at you, but what caught his eyes was you throwing punches at your reddening thighs.

“WOAH, WOAH, WOAH!” Tanaka jumped and hurried to step in front of you. He put his hands on the side of your arms and you looked up with tears streaming down your cheeks. Your eyes shined under the lights since the tears were welding in your eyes.

“R-ryu?”

“Baby...” as his eyes filled with concern and he held your face in his hands.

“W-what are you still doing here? I thought you went home already.” as you wiped the tears away in a rush and covered your thighs with your arms.

“No, no, I was going to stay behind to walk you home... Why were you punching yourself?” as he gently looked at you up down and rubbed a hand on your pink thighs.

“It was my version of coping with my anger... I’m sorry.”

“Oh my poor princess.” Tanaka sat down on the bench and turned your head towards him. He gave you a kiss on your lips before kissing your forehead. “Do you want to tell me what caused this to happen?”

“It was just a bad morning. I was late and assigned myself stupid cleaning duty to make up for my tardiness. Then I got into a fight with a classmate and got a punishment. After that I was put in another cleaning duty and god I just am so tired.” as you sighed melting to Tanaka’s touch. Tanaka had brought your head to rest on his shoulder as he ran his fingers through your hair.

“It’s okay princess, you did so well today. I am so proud of you for passing the day and finishing it off with me. It’s okay to be angry, though it’s not okay to commit brutal punches to your poor stunning thighs.” As he rubbed a hand over your thigh and gripped it a bit.

“I’m sorry...”

“Don’t be sorry. It was your way of controlling anger, though let’s try finding a different way to contain your anger. How about we choose a different tactic? Like writing your anger away or watching me do stupid things with Noya.”

“I wanna see you act stupid with Noya. You guys make me so happy. Mainly you though.” as you put on a smile to thank Tanaka. Tanaka clenched his heart with an exaggerated expression.

“God your smile is so pretty. How did I get so lucky?” as Tanaka gave you another kiss on your lips.

“Stop- you’re making me blush.” as you hid your face in your hands and stood up to get ready to leave. Tanaka laughed before bringing your hand to his lips to place a small gentle kiss.

“Let’s get you home, hm? We should take care of those sexy thighs.” he winked giving your bum a little smack and you playfully punched him.

“Gosh, you’re so weird.” as you walked towards the doors with Tanaka clinging onto you.

“Whatever, princess. I guess I’m just crazy in love with you.” Tanaka giggled like a little kid.

“Oh jeez-” As you guys left the gym hand in hand and casually being a cheesy couple at night.

-

[pbandjesse]

I'm not sure if or when I will get the clips from being on the news. But I was on the news!! It was scary but fun!

I slept okay last night. I had to get up at 6 and surpringly I was feeling good and was in a good mood. I loved my outfit and felt super cute. My eye was hurting a little bit but I was alright. I was just a little anxious about getting to the museum.

Me and James headed out and got down to the museum. Stopped for breakfast. Even if I was to nervous to eat.

Claire was at the museum already to meet us. I went and fixed the chase I made. I found a great font to replace the top line. And made a few prints. James brought in my bag I forgot in the car so I could start setting up for my workshop too. And I started feeling calmer.

The news people came. And they were so nice. The woman anchor was just coming back from her honeymoon and it was her first day back so that was exciting. I got to share the machine shop with them first. And apparently I was a natural and did great. It happened really fast but it was all fun. And I just kept telling myself people will like you more if you just do it. No nerves necessary. And I think I did a good job!

I had an hour until the next segment. So I went to set up my program. Which is where I realize there was a disaster. The foam we ordered was wrong. Very wrong. Instead of being rigid sheets it was like tissue paper. I was so upset. My heart was racing and I was like. Okay how do we fix this.

I went and told James do they could ask the group chat with the office team. And I ran around trying to find styrofoam plates. Stanley had styrofoam cups. So I started trying to cut those out but they were small and rolled and I was so upset.

But Jessica came to the rescue with meat trays! She lent me a bunch and I cut those all out and they worked great. Crisis averted just in time for the next segment.

This one was in the print shop and was my favorite one we did. I talked about the process. The chase I made for them. And the linotype. I actually maybe talked to much but it was still really fun! And they shouted out my workshops! Very cool.

I hung out and made sure the workshop was ready to go. Had a sandwich and waited for the last segment.

This was the one I was most nervous about. I had to talk about the new exhibit and I don't know a ton about beth steel. But it was good. I only stumbled a little and we showed off the touch boxes and wore the hardhats and it was real silly. And I only got a little flustered.

James's mom called them and said I was darling on the news. So I really hope I get the footage so I can see and share with everyone. But even if not it was a great experience.

Once the news left I had some time before. My workshop. And while we wouldn't have as many people as we wanted it was still excellent.

Mary from the nursery came to observe and Auni helped out too. I think she may have been surprised at how self sufficient the program gets after my intro. But I also took them to the print shop to show off the larger presses and the lithogriohy stones. Which I learned today can not be bought new anymore?? It also uses less acid then I expected, I thought it was more like etching but it is actually used to float a grade layer for the ink. Wild. Love to be able to add to my knowledge base.

The rest of the workshop was great. They all did a great job. And it was a lot of fun creating and watching the little family groups. I also just enjoyed talking to the mom's. One of their brothers for married at the same place me and James are getting married so that was awesome. And two of the kids are going to be campers at Puhtok! Amazing! They are going to be day campers but it will still be an awesome time for them I'm sure.

We went over and that was fine. I don't mind. But then we were like an hour over and I was supposed to give James a lunch break. So I was slightly stressed. But I would slowly clean up while the last two people, a lovely aunt with her niece, kept working for a while. They got to try out some rubber stamp carving too because I had some extra pieces with me and they want to try it for the next workshop so I am glad I could use it as like a promo/demo.

It was a great time though. I finished cleaning up and packing up and went to give James a little break.

Jessica came up to talk and then we had a family come over with so much positive feedback for the musuem and they were just so sweet. And it was so nice to hear positive things. And I didn't mess up any of the register stuff so that was good.

James came back and had their burrito and we chatted about dinner. But I was excited to go home. I was tired after a pretty active morning.

I was home before 2. And it was beautiful out. I changed into my house dress and put some stuff away. I had a snack. And did my knitting. And around 3 I went and laid down.

I slept for about an hour and a half. And when I woke up James was here! Editing their podcast. And then they would make me an excellent dinner. And we hung out in the living room.

I laid in the hammock and watched tiktoks and soon James was leaving to go to the game. Which has gone into extra innings. But I hope they will be home soon.

So I spent my evening enjoying my time in the apartment. I worked on the print I started last night and it is possibly done? I am really happy with it though even if it's not perfect. I think it came out so cute!!! I may make more. But I love this idea of having coloring sheets so having more then one image could be really nice.

After I did my printing the sun had gone down. And so I took a long bubble bath and it helped my skin. I have a million new spots but at least they don't hurt so bad. My skin was looking really dry earlier today. Which makes me feel worse. I don't mind the red so much. I do mind the flakes. No flakes allowed!!

So I lotion myself constantly. And will continue to do so. I am in bed now. Waiting for James to come home.

I am working a wedding tomorrow. But I am going to enjoy my day. My goal is to not feel guilty. Which is so silly but it's very hard for me. So wish me luck. If and when I get the news clips I'll post them but regardless. I hope you all have a great night. Take care of each other!! Goodnight!!

[keeptheotherone]

Mecation: Day 1 

Thursday

I once read social media described as an indulgence of the fantasy that others are interested in the details of our lives. I’m indulging in that fantasy this week by blogging about my Mecation under the guise of travel blogging ;)

If you follow me in even the most casual way, you know I’m a nurse. While I’ve enjoyed the vast majority of my 23 years as such, I don’t recommend it during a pandemic. The last 18 months have been the second-worst mental health period of my life, demoted to that position not because of the mildness of my symptoms but simply because at 15 I didn’t have the experience or perspective to realize my life was not, in fact, ruined forever.

COVID increased my personal vulnerability as a high-risk patient and made my job immensely more difficult in countless ways both small and large, but the worst part of the pandemic for me (so far) is it took away all my coping mechanisms precisely when I needed them most. Massage, pedicures, dinner out with friends, travel ... all gone practically overnight. Pre-COVID I travelled all the time--home to my parents’, long weekends by myself (Mecation!), annual visits to BFFs, conferences, tourism, the beach, my birthday, writing trips, international trips ... I always had at least one trip in the works, usually one booked and one (or more!) in the planning stages. 

When COVID started, all my close friends and family except for two lived out of state. One of those two was out of town but close enough to get together, but the other was a few hours’ drive away. I’m single and live alone; it was the most isolated I’ve ever been in my whole life. 

With my bestest friends over 500 miles away, I still feel that way sometimes. I haven’t seen them in a year. If it weren’t for COVID, it would only be 7 or 8 months (I’ve gone every January or February since ... forever). Then again, if it weren’t for COVID, I wouldn’t have been there last September; one had been hospitalized and I needed to see she was all right with my own two eyeballs. I expect it will be at least another 7 or 8 months before we get together again, bringing the total to about 20 months. One year we saw each other 5 times in 9 months, our personal best since college. 

I was alone on Christmas. Oh, I’ve spent December 25th on my own before; I’m a nurse. I’ve worked the night of the 24th or the 25th (or both), or whatever combination that didn’t leave enough time off to drive home. But I’ve never spent the Christmas season without my parents. Sometimes the week before, sometimes the week after, sometimes at my place instead of home, but always together. But last Christmas COVID was raging, the vaccines had just come out but were only available to first responders (I got mine on the 23rd), and my elderly parents didn’t feel safe to travel. So I spent Christmas without family.

Travel was not just a break from my daily routine and the stress of nursing; in many ways, the biggest benefit travel made to my mental and emotional health was giving me something to look forward to.  Proverbs 13:12 says, “Hope deferred makes the heart sick,” and ohhh, I was so heartsick last year! Not being able to travel meant I couldn’t visit my best friends of almost 25 years (more than half my life!). Not being able to travel meant I couldn’t lean on my dad or be hugged by my mom. Not being able to travel--and not knowing when I could travel--left this gaping hole in my future, and I had nothing to fill it with. 

I tell you this not to throw a pity party but to explain the significance of the trip I’m on right now. It is only my third this year: my dad and I spent a week in the mountains in February (my depression and anxiety was so bad then that was treatment, not vacation), I took a friend to the beach over my birthday, and now I’m a couple hours from home at a nice spa hotel. (I’m not counting my nephew’s graduation, which was emotionally challenging for multiple reasons, or helping a friend move from Florida. Moving is never fun.)

I started planning this trip in the spring ... May, maybe? You know, after the vaccine rolled out to everyone and case counts were dropping and it looked like we were gonna lick this thing and have a quasi-normal summer by the Fourth of July (yes, I’m American. That date is a proper noun here.). I had switched jobs in November (don’t ask) and gone on mental health leave December 29th, so I felt I owed it to my unit to put in about six months of work before taking any significant time off, especially since I came back at 24 hours instead of 36. That meant September.

I knew what I wanted to do: 4 or 5 days at an all-inclusive resort in the Caribbean. I’d been before and loved the freedom of not worrying about every little expenditure (what can I say, I’m cheap), and a few days of Vitamin Sea sounded perfect.

Then came Delta.

All right, maybe going out of the country isn’t the best idea, I thought. Don’t want to end up with expensive reservations and then your destination closes to Americans, or you make it to your chosen island but can’t get back home. But I didn’t want to fly (ugh, airports!), I didn’t want to drive (rest stops and restaurants and gas stations), and while I thought about taking the train, it didn’t seem much of an improvement (and maybe a downgrade) on flying.

Then a friend mentioned a sleeper car, and I thought yes! That could work! I’ve never been to New England, I want to go to Boston, that area of the country has low case rates and the highest vaccination rates, this has potential! 

Then I looked at the CDC map. There were only four states that didn’t have high transmission at that time (early August, I think; I’d had to wait for confirmation that my time off had been approved): Michigan, Rhode Island, Maine, and New Hampshire. All four had substantial rates of transmission. Hardly ideal, but one thing I’ve learned this year is sometimes you have to make compromises to protect your mental health. It is true it doesn’t matter if you’re happy if you’re dead; it is also true it doesn’t matter if you’re safe if you want to kill yourself. (I’m not suicidal, I am receiving treatment, don’t anybody panic.)

So, now I’ve settled on Maine or New Hampshire by train via sleeper car (Michigan is too far for a 4-5 day trip and RI--meh). Well, as I got deeper into planning, turned out Maine or NH were awfully far too. Far enough I would have to overnight in a major city, which pretty much defeated the purpose of isolating in a sleeper car. Then I found out there were no sleeper cars on either train route.

So, now vacation is 5 weeks away and I’m back at square one. The Deep South, Texas, and Florida are imploding. Pediatric cases are rising--kids are sicker and make up a higher percentage of cases than they did last year. Scuttlebutt from my ICU colleagues is it’s bad--17/30 MICU beds are COVID and they’re all vented. SICU is being nicknamed “the ECMO unit.” The hospital has 18(!) ECMO machines and 12 are in use; the float nurse who tells us that didn’t even know we had 12 because she’s never seen that many in use at one time. Hospital-wide our numbers are equivalent to early February (we peaked in January). There were six--SIX--pediatric rapid responses in one day. 

And I’m going to travel.

It’s a big deal ... a big accomplishment, really, because of what it says about how I’m successfully managing my anxiety. April 1 was the first time I’d been inside a grocery store in more than a year ... and that wasn’t my idea. It was late April or May before I was comfortable eating in restaurants, even with the falling case count at the time. I’m still not sure if I’m managing my anxiety or reacting to the pressure by going to the opposite extreme (I have a history of that), but I know I’m less stressed, less anxious, have fewer obsessive thoughts, fewer physical symptoms, and am learning to live with this disease. 

So, here I sit at a marble-topped 5-foot-wide desk in my queen/queen hotel room at the end of a productive and enjoyable day. I slept in, completed the big goal of this weekend’s to-do list that I honestly thought would take several days, unpacked and organized my room (I arrived yesterday evening), reorganized my Favorites Bar and Bookmarks on my Mac, had an 80-minute aromatherapy massage, enjoyed a shower in the spa afterwards and even blow-dried my hair(!) before wandering around for a while to get the lay of the land and get some steps in (this place is huge!). Then I changed clothes and took myself out to dinner for my favorite food, Italian. 

That’s me in the picture up top, all dressed up :) Actually, I probably look pretty normal to y’all; like most people with depression, my personal hygiene sunk to new lows in the last year and a half, and as a low-maintenance person to begin with, that’s saying a lot. I bought that necklace as a bridesmaid and am not sure I’ve worn it since; this spring was her 10th anniversary. Yesterday I took out the cat-shaped earrings Dad gave me for Christmas. (Yes, they were gross. Yes, I cleaned them. Yes, I’m wearing them again now.) Just wearing a nice top, fixing my hair (no ponytail or claw-clip bun, my staples), and adding jewelry was a big deal ... especially since “no one” was going to see me. I did it just for me, to make myself feel good. And I did. (That’s another small pleasure COVID took away from me--lip gloss. If I wore any makeup at all, it was lipstick or gloss. Utterly pointless when you’re masked whenever you’re in public.)

I took my laptop to dinner and edited a couple chapters of my new Charlie/Amy fic (previewed during #ktoo turns 10), ran a couple errands, and headed back to the hotel since I don’t like to be out late by myself in an unfamiliar city. Forgot I put my receipt envelope in the backseat pocket and reorganized the glove compartment looking for it, then gathered a bunch of returns into a bag in the trunk. Hung out writing in the lobby until my Mac threatened to die, came upstairs and tidied up, put on my jammies, and talked to you guys :) 

[captain-josslett]

Hospitalised Part Two

(Part One) 

Summary: Emma gets very ill while having sister night with Kara and Alex.

Words: 4.5k+

Warnings: Vomit, Needles, Mentions of Blood, Pain, Claustrophobia, Angst, Fluff

Pairings: Emma Danvers x Lena Luthor (Eventual), Alex Danvers x Sam Arias

Okayyyy. So I’ve been working on this all week. Humming and ahhing it this was good enough. But I’m just gonna most it. There should be a part 3 at some point! I hope this is okay!

Thank you for reading and let me know if you wanna be tagged or any general feedback will be greatly appreciated.

Taglist: @thewitchandtheassassin , @natasha-danvers , @life-is-hella-unfair , @finleyfray​, @supergirl-writingz​

It has been five days since Emma Danvers was admitted into the hospital and her own private room. Many tests have been performed, one being an ultrasound where the technician confirmed Emma’s gallbladder was overflowing with stones. Causing her sister’s to hug her close.

More tests were scheduled for later in the week after the antibiotics should have taken out most of the infection in Emma’s liver. The test Emma is dreading the most is getting an MRI. Alex had to tell her all the calming techniques she knew to prepare Emma for when she is slid into the claustrophobic space.

But in the early hours of the morning Emma’s jaundice, hazel green eyes snap open as a familiar pain shoots through her body.

“Fuck!” She cries through gritted teeth. She slowly sits up and rocks her body to try and relieve the stabbing pain in her chest, right shoulder and back. But she feels no relief. “Please stop!” Emma whimpers desperately.

“Em?” Kara’s sleepy voice calls out from the bed next to her in the darkened hospital room.

But all Emma can do is respond in pained gasps and moans. She’s suddenly blinded by a light being turned on. Revealing Kara standing next to her bed.

“Oh Em!” Kara reaches out and feel’s Emma’s sweaty forehead. “I’m gonna get help!” Kara turns to rush out of the hospital room but stops when her baby sister takes a hold of her arm.

“Stay.” Emma wheezes. “Button.”

“Duh, sorry.” Kara rolls her eyes at herself, in her sleepy mind she forgot about the simple technology in the room. She presses the button on the wall to alert the nurse on duty.

The corner of Emma’s right lip goes up slightly in a smile and she weaves her fingers through Kara’s. Her sister gently squeezes her hand, hating how helpless she feels and at how yellow and pale Emma looks. How she’s constantly rocking.

“Glasses. Please.” Emma hates her thick rimmed glasses but she hates not being able to see more.

“Of course! Here.” Kara opens up the glasses and places them in Emma’s other hand. Emma puts them on and the room focuses.

“Good Morning Emma.” Emma’s favourite nurse, Sarah, enters the room and approaches the sister’s immediately. Looking over the machines and tapping on her tablet. “Where’s the pain?”

“The usual. Was. Asleep.” Emma gasps out, trying to breathe through the pain. Her head lolled back and forth repeatedly.

“Okay, from a scale of 1 to 10?”

“9.” Emma grits out. Kara gently squeezes her hand again and Emma weakly squeezes back.

“Okay, I’m going to give you some more morphine to help you feel more comfortable.” Sarah quickly gets to work and after a while Emma is able to lean back on the raised bed. The morphine taking effect and helping her body start to relax. “Better?” Sarah asks as she takes Emma’s temperature and blood pressure.

“Yea, a 7.”

Sarah nods and writes some notes on the tablet in her hand. “I’ll contact the Doctors to let them know you’ve had another attack. We’ll need to do another blood test.”

Emma shrugs her shoulders at her. Needles used to scare her but after being poked and prodded so much her fear has lessened.

“Atta girl!” The nurse smiles brightly and starts the process of the blood test.

“So I was thinking.” Kara starts suddenly making Emma look at her in surprise. “I still can’t see why you prefer The Little Mermaid to Beauty and The Beast!”

A laugh escapes Emma’s lips. Knowing Kara is trying to distract her. “It’s because of Ursula. I mean her voice is incredible. And the laugh! Plus I love ‘Part Of Your World’ more than any song in Beauty and The Beast.”

“But the ballroom scene -!”

“Sharp scratch.” Sarah calls out.

“Is wonderful and I still cry at it.” Emma smiles at Kara’s horrified face. She grimaces slightly when she feels the needle go in. “But it always bugs me how a Prince doesn’t know how to read. Or the fact the fairy turned him into the beast when he was a kid.”

“All done!” The nurse smiles at the sister’s and cleans Emma up.

“Thank you Sarah.” Emma says gratefully and she waits for the nurse to leave the room. “Sorry I woke you.” Emma says softly to her sister.

“Don’t be, it’s what I’m here for.” Kara reaches up and cups Emma’s face. Rubbing her thumb over her cheek.

“But you’ve had a busy day.” Emma whines, knowing Kara worked at Catco and then many hours Supergirling around the city.

“The joys of the work I do.” Kara jokes. “But you are so much more important Em.”

Emma smiles but she feels her eyes growing heavy. The painkillers taking full effect.

“Looks like someone needs to go back to sleep.” Kara says while kissing Emma’s head.

Emma nods slightly. She can’t remember the last time she’s slept solidly and feels refreshed after. Which annoys Emma greatly as she loves sleep.

Kara turns to go back to the spare bed but Emma holds on to her hand. “Stay?” Her weak voice broke Kara’s heart.

“Sure.”

Emma budges over and Kara climbs up on the bed. holding Emma close to her.

“Love you.” Emma says while yawning.

“Love you too little one.” Kara carefully removes Emma’s glasses and places them on the table next to them.

“Only a year younger.” Emma breathes out, feeling herself relaxing in her sister’s arms.

“Yea.” Kara strokes Emma’s blonde hair trying to soothe her. She smiles while listening to her sister’s breathing getting deeper and her heart rate slowing down as she falls asleep.

Kara wakes up to the sound of soft voices. The superhero slowly lifts her head and blinks the sleep away. Across the room on the sofa’s is Alex and Eliza, looking over a tablet.

It seems her mother instinct kicks in because Eliza looks up at her two daughters on the bed and sees Kara is awake. Eliza smiles, quietly gets up and makes her way to the bed. Alex follows behind her, still looking over the tablet in her hands.

“Morning Kara.” Eliza says as she leans down and gives Kara a kiss on her cheek. Her eyes shifted to Emma, snuggled into Kara’s neck.

“Morning.” Kara can’t help but let out a yawn.

“I see she had another attack last night.” Alex whispers scrolling through the information on the tablet.

Kara sighs heavily. “Yea, she was fine when we went to sleep but I woke up to her cursing in pain.”

“My poor baby.” Eliza reaches down and strokes Emma’s blonde hair. “I can see what you mean by how jaundice she looks. And you said it suddenly happened?”

“Yes.” Alex looks up from the tablet. “She was fine a week ago, nothing was wrong other than how tired she was.”

“Yea, but she was sleeping a lot more. I just took it as her period was coming up.” Kara whispers as she rubs a hand against Emma’s back.

“But the day she was admitted I did think her colour looked off. I did notice the signs and I’m angry I didn’t do anything about it.” Alex growls in frustration.

“We can’t change what’s in the past.” Eliza says gently.

Alex nods and goes to get a chair for her Mom and herself. Kara happily stays on the bed, being Emma’s pillow. The three women quietly talk until suddenly Emma bolts up.

“I’m gonna be sick!”

Alex leaps into action and grabs a sick bowl just in time. Kara jumps off the bed, aware her body heat could cause Emma more discomfort. She presses the call button again. Eliza holds Emma’s hair back and puts it in a loose ponytail. She frowns at the pain Emma is in. How her baby daughter rocks back and forth as she heaves. The tears streaming down her pale cheeks.

“Another one?” Sarah says as she quickly rushes in.

“Yes, she suddenly sat up saying she was about to be sick.”

“Poor Emma. Here.” Sarah hands Alex a new bowl while taking the partly full one. She gathers more painkillers and anti sickness medication and injects them into Emma’s cannula. “There you go Emma, you should feel that relief soon.”

Emma nods weakly as she dry heaves. Her eyes squeezed tightly shut. “I wanna go home.” She whimpers causing her sisters and Mom’s heart to break.

“I know baby girl.” Eliza tries to soothe her daughter. Looking on helplessly as she rubs her back.

“Mama?” Emma gasps out before throwing up again.

“I’m here.”

Emma subconsciously leans into her Mom, who has to take the bowl as Alex almost had to lean over the bed due to Emma’s movement.

“I’ve got you baby girl.” Eliza coos and holds her daughter close.

Finally Emma stops heaving and Sarah makes more notes. “Pain level Emma?”

“I-I-I do-don-’t-”

Alex and Kara frown at each other. Worried at how slurred Emma’s speech was.

“That’s okay Emma, lean back and rest okay?” Sarah says kindly. Taking the bowl from Eliza and disposing of it.

Emma feels her Mom slowly lay her back down and immediately falls back asleep, holding her Mom’s hand.

Sarah reenters the room and picks up her tablet, typing away. Finally she looks up at the worried women around the bed. “I’ll alert the Doctors immediately. They should be here soon and generally they have a meeting before going around the wards.”

“Is this normal?” Kara asks, biting her lip.

“Generally no. But each case can be different. Unfortunately Emma seems to have the worst end of the stick.”

The nurse leaves and Kara changes into the clothes she brought with her. Both sister’s decide they are going to take time off work and stay with Emma. Both knowing they won’t be able to concentrate with how Emma is deteriorating. J’onn readily agrees and will cover as director and for Supergirl.

An hour later the door opens. All three women look over and they give Sam and Lena barely their smiles.

“Don’t look too happy to see us!” Sam jokes as she reaches Alex and gives her a kiss on the lips.

“Sorry, Emma had two more attacks in quick succession.”

“Oh no.” Sam breathes out and looks at the blonde in the bed. “She… She does look more yellow… Or am I imagining that?”

“No, she has got worse.” Kara says rubbing a hand over her forehead. Her worry for her baby sister makes her feel anxious and helpless. Realising Lena hasn’t said anything Kara looks up at the raven haired women standing at the end of the bed. “Lena?”

The CEO is staring at Emma intently, looking over every part that she can see. Analysing and running through ways she can help the woman she loves.

“Lena?”

Lena jumps when Kara calls for her again.

“Sorry.” She says quickly and sits in the chair by Kara.

“Don’t be. It’s not easy seeing her like this.” Kara wraps an arm around Lena’s shoulder and pulls her in for a hug.

“Have the Doctors been in?” Sam asks Alex, who shakes her head.

“Not yet.” Alex answers softly, running a hand through her hair. “Sarah said they need to get the MRI done so they can have a better picture of what’s going on. There may be a chance a stone has got caught somewhere and we don’t want that getting left behind when they operate.”

“Poor Em.” Sam looks at the blonde sympathetically and focuses on the hand Eliza is holding. She wonders how Eliza is keeping everything together. If this was happening to Ruby, Sam knows she would be a frantic mess.

Another hour passes. Lena and Sam reluctantly have to leave. Lena is especially sad she didn’t get to talk to Emma and feeling guilty for how busy she’s been the past few days. Even though she’s been leaving work in record time to spend the evenings with Emma, it never seems to be enough time. Lena places a kiss on Emma’s cheek, leaving a red lipstick mark, which she quickly wipes off. Not realising her kiss had woken Emma up.

After they leave there’s a knock on the door. Emma stirs more, taking a deep breath in as she starts to open her eyes.

“May we come in?” Dr Stevens asks as they open the door.

Eliza nods and Dr Stevens, Sarah and a few interns filter into the room.

“Ah Emma! You're awake.” Dr Stevens smiles kindly at the blonde. Who gives a weak smile back. “How are you feeling?”

“Sore.” Emma’s voice is low and gruff. She coughs and Alex immediately grabs the cup of water by the bed and hands it to Emma. Who takes it gratefully, taking small sips. Alex picks up Emma’s glasses and carefully places them on her baby sister. Making sure they go on properly.

“What level is the pain?”

Emma thinks for a moment as she assesses how she feels. “Between 7 and an 8.”

“That isn’t good.” Dr Stevens looks down at their tablet. ��Sarah, once Emma has her MRI can you set up a morphine drip? That way we can keep Emma more comfortable.”

Sarah nods and taps on her tablet the new information.

“Due to the recent attacks we are putting you ahead of the MRI queue. One of my interns will take you down in a moment. You need to take anything that has metal off, including jewellery, bras, little pieces of metal in clothes etc.”

Emma nods sluggishly at the surgeon.

“Do you have any questions?” Dr Stevens keeps their focus on Emma who looks at those around her.

“No, I think we are okay for the moment.” Eliza says squeezing Emma’s hand.

“Actually.” Alex pipes up causing everyone to look at her. “Have you got the results from the recent blood test?”

“We do, but I want to see what the MRI shows first.”

Alex nods at this and leans back into her chair. The surgeon bids them goodbye and all of the interns follow them out.

Emma reaches up and tries to unclasp her ear studs. When she struggles Kara stands and helps her remove them.

“Thanks Kar.” Emma says gratefully while Kara places them in a small pot by Emma’s bed. Emma turns her head looking at Eliza, who holds her hand again. “Hey Mom.” Emma has wanted her Mom terribly but due to Eliza’s work she couldn’t get to her baby daughter quick enough. Something that has frustrated Eliza greatly.

“Hi baby girl.” Eliza stands and holds her daughter close. A sniff escapes the blonde until the damn breaks and she’s sobbing into her Mom’s arms. The feeling of safety and home overwhelming her.

“Sorry.” Emma chokes out, feeling embarrassed by her outburst.

“Oh Emma. It’s okay.” Her Mom says while kissing the top of her head.

“But it’s stupid.”

“No it isn’t. You’re in pain and very unwell. You’re allowed to cry.”

“Yea.” Alex stands and hugs Emma’s back. Kara reaches out and takes a hold of Emma’s hand. “We don’t think any less of you for crying Em.”

“Sorry to interrupt but I need to take Emma down.” A female intern stood in the doorway. Kara, Alex and Eliza pull away. Emma shoots Alex a look of panic and Alex motioned with her hand for Emma to take deep breaths. Which Emma copies, but she still looks terrified.

“Remember to keep your eyes closed and think of nice things.” Alex says encouragingly.

“Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens.” Kara starts singing ‘My Favourite Things” from The Sound Of Music.

“Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens.” Emma sings with a smile on her face. They both sing the next few lines to each other.

“Brown paper packages tied up with string. These are a few of my favourite things.”

Alex rolls her eyes but smiles at her two musical loving sisters.

The intern smiles too and steps forward making Emma focus on her. “And I just need to check your clothing for metal. Is that okay?”

Emma nods and the intern lifts the blanket and sheets back. Checking the holes and drawstring in Emma’s sweatpants. They pull the sheet and blanket up over Emma.

“Are you wearing a bra?”

“No.”

“Great! And your earrings are out.” The intern pulls the bars up either side of Emma and everyone moves out of the way. Emma looks at Alex again in a panic.

“You’ll be fine Em.” Alex reaches out and holds Emma’s hand.

“You can have someone come down with you. They won’t be in the room with you though.” The intern offers kindly.

Emma looks at Alex and bites her lip.

“Would you like me to come down with you?” Alex asks softly, smiling at how much Emma looks like the child she remembers from their youth. All wide eyed and scared.

Emma nods and Alex keeps a hold of her hand.

“We’ll be here when you get back.” Eliza kisses Emma’s forehead and holds her daughter close. Next Kara gives Emma a crushing hug. Trying to convey all her love in that moment.

“Can’t. Breathe.” Emma gasps out.

“Sorry!” Kara flies back causing Emma to laugh but reaches for her sister again, pulling her into another, more gentle hug.

“I’m sorry but we really have to go.” The intern disengages the break and starts pushing the trolley forward.

Kara lets go of Emma and stands with Eliza in the room. They watch Emma being wheeled out with Alex by her side.

“Al…” Emma says quietly as they wait in the elevator. Alex looks down at her and squeezes her hand.

“Yea?”

“I’m nervous.”

“It’s okay to be nervous Em. But you got this. The doctors need this scan to know the best way to perform the surgery.” Alex reaches up and strokes her thumb across Emma’s yellow cheek. “You remember all the breathing exercises I taught you?”

Emma nods. “But what if I freak out?”

“Honestly, Em, we don’t have time for you to freak out. You need this scan. Keep your mind busy with things you like and focus on your breathing. The machine will let you know when to hold your breath and all that.”

“Okay.” But Emma didn’t feel okay. If she was linked to a heart monitor she was sure it would be going haywire at the moment.

The elevator doors slide open and the intern wheels them to the MRI room. Emma is immediately intimated by the huge machine, and the small gap in its centre. The technician greets them and goes through everything with Emma and asks the usual questions “Are you pregnant?” Which earned a snort from Emma before confirming she wasn’t.

“Okay, so we are all ready for you. Can you stand and walk to the slab?”

“Yes.”

The intern lowers one side of the railing around the bed and Emma slowly lifts her legs over the side. Alex stands by her side, helping Emma get to her feet. Emma closes her eyes for a moment as the room spins around her. Causing Alex to hold onto her.

“Em?”

“M’okay.” Taking a deep breath she opens her eyes again, taking a few cautious steps with Alex holding onto her shoulders and walking with her. They reach the slab and Alex helps her sit down.

“Going to need you to take your glasses I’m afraid.”

“Okay.” Emma takes them off and hands them to Alex. Her sister leans down and hugs her.

“You’ll be fine.” Alex says reassuringly and places a kiss on Emma’s cheek.

“Thanks Al.” Emma thinks she smiles at Alex, but she can no longer see Alex’s face. Just a blob of colour.

The voice of the technician is what she hears next.“Put these earbuds in, they will drown out most of the noise and you’ll hear when the machine instructs you to breathe and when to hold your breath.”

Emma holds out her hand and the ear buds are placed in it.  Emma puts them in her ear and immediately the noises of the room dims. She then lies on the slab and the technician places a shield over her chest and lower body. She is strapped onto the slab and the technician gives her the thumbs up. Or what looks like the thumbs up.

“Ready?” A muffled voice calls out.

“Re-ready.”

The machine suddenly slides her in and she has no problem seeing the top right in front of her face. For a split second panic floods through Emma and she feels like she’s in a coffin. But Emma immediately closes her eyes and focuses on her breathing.

After a while Emma starts imagining she is on a plane. The hum of the machine being similar to that of a plane. The cold air being pumped around her, reminding her of the air con on a plane. How Emma always needs to wrap up and take a blanket with her. The feeling of being squished into the machine, just like being squished in a small seat on a plane.

She pictures herself sitting next to Lena, on their way to Paris or Rome or Athens. Places Emma is desperate to visit one day.

“When you hear the beep, take a deep breath and hold for 15 seconds until you hear the next beep.” An automated voice calls out. Emma follows the instructions and holds her breath and releases when she hears the beeps. This continues for some time. Emma starts getting annoyed every time the automated voice interrupts her day dream of being in a city with Lena. Like visiting the Eiffel Tower or the Colosseum. All the different foods they could try.

Finally Emma feels the machine sliding her out.

“Well done! You’re a very good breather!” The technician jokes causing Emma to snort.

“Well that's good… I guess.” Emma says while the technician unstraps her and removes the shields.

“Here.” Alex says while holding out her glasses.

Emma takes them and puts them on. She looks up at her sister who smiles brightly at her.

“Told you you could do it!”

Emma smiles back at her before slowly sitting up. Alex helps her to her feet again and they walk to the gurney.

“One of our top guys is looking over the scans now, they should let your surgeon know ASAP.” The technician says kindly as the intern pulls the sides up again.

“Thank you.” Emma smiles at the and waves when she’s being wheeled out. “Please don’t make me do that for a long time.”

“I promise.” Alex says while taking a hold of her sister’s hand. “How are you feeling?”

“Hungry.”

“Unfortunately you may not be able to eat. You will probably be nil by mouth until we know if your surgery will be today.” The intern interrupts.

Subconsciously Emma lowers her head and squeezes Alex’s hand tightly. Alex looks down at her sister, seeing how defeated Emma looks.

“Hey.” Scared yellow eyes look up at her. “You’ll be okay.”

Emma nods but remains quiet, lowering her head again as they make the way back to her room.

“Emma! How’d it go?” Kara’s cheerful voice makes Emma lookup as the gurney is put back in place.

“Was okay.” Emma softly says while Sarah installs the morphine drip.

“When you need pain relief just press this button.” Sarah says and Emma nods. Pressing the button immediately. The movement earlier had aggravated her pain.

A voice Emma didn’t expect spoke next. “Was it as bad as you thought?” Green eyes connect with Emma’s jaundice ones. A small smile breaks across Emma’s face.

“No. Though I didn’t shut my eyes quick enough when they slid me in. But I just imagined I was on a plane.”

“That’s a good way of describing it actually.” Eliza says while sitting next to Emma’s bed.

“And I don’t want to sound rude, but, Lee?” Emma’s gaze focuses back on her crush. “What are you doing here? I thought today you had back to back meetings.”

“I managed to do some rearranging. As it’s Friday many were happy to reschedule as it meant they could start their weekend sooner. And as it’s lunch time I brought everyone something.” Lena goes over to the coffee table and picks up the take away bags with Alex and Emma’s food in.

“Oh! I er…” Emma pale cheeks colour in a blush.

“She’s not allowed to eat anything at the moment.” Alex says as she takes the bag Lena holds out to her.

“Why not?!” Kara looks at her sister outraged.

“Incase I have surgery today.”

“Oh! I’m sorry Em.” Lena looks guiltily at the blonde, putting the bag containing Emma’s food back on the coffee table, out of Emma’s view. Though Emma knows Kara will likely be eating it soon anyway.

“Would you rather we ate somewhere else?” Emma notices Sam by the sofa, already eating her lunch. She quickly looks at everyone, almost laughing loudly at how conflicted Kara looks.

“No it’s fine.”

“Phew!” Kara starts eating again, in record time to make up for the few seconds she wasn’t eating.

“So where did you imagine you were flying too?” Sam asks to break up the silence.

“Either Paris, Rome or Athens.”

“Oo nice! Have you been there?” Sam asks with a bright smile.

Emma shakes her head. “No.”

“Maybe I can take you sometime?” Lena tilts her head at Emma and smiles at her.

“CanIcome?” Kara says with a mouth full of food.

“Kara!” Eliza scoffs.

“Was that in english?” Emma laughs loudly.

Kara swallows before trying again. “Sorry, I said, can I come?”

Alex wanted to kick her sister’s shin and shoot her a glare. Instead she looks at Sam who gently rolls her eyes. Alex smirks into her lunch.

“I’ll take you another time.” Lena smiles at her best friend. Secretly making a plan in her head of taking Emma on a week, maybe two week holiday to these cities. Maybe add a few more in that Emma would love.

“Aw okay.” Kara sighs heavily.

‘So oblivious!’ Alex thinks as she shakes her head slightly.

Suddenly a big yawn escapes Emma. “How am I so tired?” She rubs her face frustrated.

“Cause your body is going through a lot.” Alex says between mouthfuls. “Plus you haven’t been sleeping well. Not good quality sleep anyway.”

“Yea… What is that again?”

“You poor thing.” Kara reaches out and strokes Emma’s arm. Careful not to tug the wires attached to the morphine drip.

Emma smiles at her sister and feels her eyes growing heavy. She blinks, trying to keep sleep away as long as possible.

“Emma, sleep, it’s okay.” Her Mom stands and strokes Emma’s head.

“Lee’s here.” Emma says wearily. “Specially.”

“I’ll be here when you wake up Em.” Lena stands next to Eliza. She watches Emma’s yellow eyes slide close and open quickly before closing again repeating. Reaching out Lena takes Emma’s hand and rubs her thumb over it. “Sleep darling.”

Emma finally can’t fight it anymore and her eyes remain close.

[simp-for-spencer-reid]

Sugar with a Side of Coffee Ch. 8- The First Moves

Chapter 8: The First Moves Series Masterlist

Spencer’s mood had been particularly lifted the past few days at work, and it did not go unnoticed by the team. They knew that Spencer had been seeing the girl from The Empty Mug, but he wasn’t keen on giving them details about their relationship, or friendship rather, as he insisted. Not that he liked keeping secrets from the team, but it was nice to have something for his own. He was sure that he would properly introduce them someday, but for now, she was his little secret. He liked it that way.

For the past few days, Cate was staying at Marta’s above the coffee shop due to the leaking pipe thanks to her upstairs neighbors. They were doing construction and needed access to the pipe through her ceiling. She and Marta hadn’t spent this much time together since they were roommates in college. Cate didn’t want to admit that Marta was slowly getting on her nerves, despite being very grateful that Marta was letting her stay. The Miller’s apartment above The Empty Mug was small, but homey.

So small in fact, that Cate was staying in Marta’s room in the same bed. Marta was a kicker in her sleep. Cate’s lack of sleep was likely the cause of her irritability. Shrimp stayed in Marta’s room as well, but slept in his carrier because he too was not a fan of Marta’s constant moving figure throughout the night. 

Cate was getting her laundry together to go to the laundromat when she got a voice message from Spencer. 

“Hi it’s Spencer. I was wondering if you had any plans tonight? I hope you don’t mind but I read your books and I wanted to know if you maybe wanted to watch the movies with me? Not all of them, of course, that would take 19 hours, but maybe the first couple if you wanted. This is getting to be a long message. Um, bye.” Cate smiled, but looked at her basket full of laundry. She sent a message back.

“Hi Spence, I’d love to, but I have to run to the laundromat so I can catch up on some laundry. You’re more than welcome to come if you’d like?” She hit send and then quickly made another. “Also, not a problem about reading my books. How did you like them?” She put her phone down and grabbed the rest of her clothes. Her phone chimed again.

Spencer’s stomach flipped when she had called him that nickname. Sure, Emily and JJ called him that from time to time, but the sound of it coming from Cate’s lips made him want to replay the message over and over. He tried to wait a few minutes before answering, but he was eager to respond to her.

“Actually, I have laundry to do too. Can I pick you up and we can go together?” After Spencer hit send, he was reminded of the free laundry machines in the basement of his building. He had used them last night to catch up on his own laundry. He changed into a new set of clothes and put his ‘dirty’ ones in a basket along with a random pile of clean clothes he had washed last night. He ruffled his hand around to unfold them and make it less obvious. His phone chimed with a new text message from Cate:

Sure :) 

The drive to The Empty Mug was short, and Cate was outside waiting, with her basket balanced on her hip. Spencer tried not to stare as he pulled up. Her hair was pulled back in a messy ponytail, a few strands framing her face. She sported some glasses for the first time since Spencer had met her. She smiled and gave a little wave when she saw his car. 

She hopped in the passenger seat after placing her basket in the back. The drive to the laundromat was quiet, the radio playing classical music to fill the silence. It drove Spencer crazy, for once, he had nothing to say. His palms were sweating against the steering wheel, he couldn’t string words together to form a sentence he didn’t deem stupid in his mind. 

Cate, on the other hand, was content. Her cheeks hurt from smiling the whole way to the laundromat. She snuck glances at Spencer every couple of minutes, watching him drive. She played with her fingers. His car even smelled like him. Suddenly, Cate smacked a hand against her forehead.

“I forgot my quarters!” she laughed in disbelief as they pulled into the parking lot. The shock on Spencer’s face quickly subsided to a smile as he gently laughed.

“I have plenty of quarters, I can cover it.” He rested a hand on her knee, but quickly pulled it back when he remembered his sweaty palm. To cover his quick movement, he unbuckled and got out of the car to retrieve his basket. Cate followed his actions and got her basket as well. 

They both picked adjacent machines and sat next to each other in the waiting seats. Cate pulled her legs up, arms looping around them and chin resting on her knees. Spencer crossed an ankle over his knee, folding his hands together.

“Thanks,” Cate said softly. “For the quarters.” She clarified. Spencer shrugged.

“It was nothing. Just a few dollars.” He turned his attention to the swirl of his clothes in the sudsy water. He looked for something to talk about, “So, for the record, I totally did not think Professor Snape was going for the Sorcerer's Stone.” That was not a lie.

“What?” Cate whipped her head to look at him. “You’re joking, it was written to make it seem like it was Snape the whole time!” Cate spoke animatedly with her hands, throwing them out in front of her. 

“Classic red herring trope.” Spencer scoffed. “It was almost too obvious!” Cate lightly whacked his shoulder. A smile grew on her face, erupting into a laugh.

“I forgot I was talking to an insufferable literature nerd.” Cate jabbed. Spencer laughed with her. 

“In all fairness, you were what? In the fourth grade when you read them?” Spencer guessed. “I am an adult, I can pick up on things that a child’s mind can’t.” Cate shook her head.

“Actually, I was in the first grade.” Cate poked his chest. “I found my sister’s collection. She told me I was too young to read them, so I made our mom buy me my own set, and it took me a whole year just to get through the first book. Imagine trying to sound out all those spells!” Spencer looked at her with raised eyebrows. He noted to never challenge her. 

The washer stopped spinning and the pair moved to switch their clothes into a dryer. Spencer could smell her citrusy detergent as she put her clothes into the basket to bring them to a dryer. He reached into his pockets for more quarters. 

“Slight problem.” He realized. “I only have enough quarters for one dryer.” He could feel his face turning red. Cate looked at their loads.

“I mean, I think we could squeeze it in one machine if that’s alright with you? They look pretty big.” Cate suggested. 

“Uh, yeah that works for me.” Spencer tried not to seem so flustered. Cate put her clothes into the dryer and watched Spencer put his own in along with a dryer sheet. She held out an outstretched hand. Spencer emptied the quarters in his pocket into her palm. He watched as she placed them in the slot. 

The two continued chatting about Spencer’s first read through of Cate’s favorite series. The laundromat was empty, but filled with the sound of their laughter. The sky outside darkened and the lights of the city speckled their view. Cate yawned.

“Did you still, or, would you still like to come over to watch a movie?” Spencer asked. Cate stretched, trying to wake herself up. 

“Yeah, I just need to find energy or I might end up like you during the Anastasia movie.” Cate elbowed Spencer in the arm. 

“I can make coffee when we get to mine?” Spencer tried to not sound too inviting. He didn’t want to pressure her. 

“Um, that would be okay.” Cate smiled. Their attention was drawn to the dryer that had stopped spinning. They walked over to the dryer. Cate pulled all the clothes out into a metal rolling basket of the laundromat’s. She rolled it between the seats that held Spencer’s basket and her own, so they could separate their clothes. 

The pair pulled their clothes out. Spencer folded his nicely, placing it back in the basket. Cate on the other hand, put them in a duffle bag she had brought, not bothering to fold them. Spencer pulled a cardigan out, it smelled like Cate’s detergent. Cate pulled out a sweatshirt, still warm from the dryer. She swapped sweatshirts as Spencer reached into the metal basket again. Cate’s head pushed through the neck hole as Spencer held up a pair of dress pants, preparing to fold them. Cate swiped them out of his grasp. 

“What?” Spencer reached for them. “Those are mine, my initials are stitched on the tag!” He grabbed them back. Cate tried to hold on. 

“Yes, but I just need to see them for a second.” Cate’s face was turning very red. Spencer’s brows furrowed. He let them go in confusion. He watched as Cate peeled a bright pink lace thong that had been stuck with static to his tan pants. He cleared his throat and looked away.

“Oh.” was all he could manage, sifting through the metal basket for another item of his clothing. 

“Sorry.” Cate squeaked. She handed him back his pants. There was an awkward silence as they got to the bottom of their clothes. Cate and Spencer finally glanced at each other. Cate was the first to laugh to ease her nerves. Spencer joined her soon after.

With the laundry done, The two went back to Spencer’s and like promised, Spencer made them each a cup of coffee, which he deemed not nearly as good as that from The Empty Mug. They had settled on the couch next to each other. The first Harry Potter movie playing in the background. Spencer noticed how Cate didn’t take one sip from her mug. In fact, he didn’t think that he ever saw her drink coffee in front of him. 

“You don’t like coffee.” He profiled. He couldn't help it. “How can you work at a coffee shop and not like coffee?” He said. His face contorted as he realized how ridiculous it sounded. Cate just smiled and shrugged.

“I don’t know,” Cate drew out the last word. “I like the way it smells, though.” She offered. The movie was forgotten in the background as the pair laughed. Spencer bit the bullet, diving head first. Being brave like he could be out on the field, yet in Cate’s presence he felt like a pile of mush. 

“Do you want to go to the Smithsonian with me?” He rambled out fast. “They have a literature exhibit and I haven’t seen it yet and I thought maybe you’d like to go with me.” Spencer left out the one part he wanted to mention. Cate did it for him.

“It’s a date.” she smiled over her now cold cup of coffee. 

“Really?” Spencer wanted to make sure he wasn’t dreaming right now.

“Yeah. I’ve never been to the Smithsonian before.” Cate placed the mug on the coffee table in front of them and brought the knitted blanket she had used before to her shoulders. She felt her insides flutter as she imagined the huge museum, and Spencer by her side. Spencer made a mental note to get tickets tomorrow for the weekend. His attention was drawn back to the movie. He couldn’t keep his mind from thinking of her words. It’s a date. He couldn’t think of anything better than being surrounded by the literature classics and Cate. He ran a hand through his hair. As his arm rested on the back of the sofa, Cate’s head lolled onto his shoulder. 

She was asleep. Spencer carefully took her glasses off of her face and placed them on his coffee table next to her full mug. He took this time to look over her face without fear of being caught. She had light freckles that peppered over her nose. The credits played in the background. Without thought, he brushed some stray hairs off of her forehead. At the touch, Cate sleepily crinkled her nose. Spencer panicked and drew his hand back to the arm rest, frozen. 

It was growing later, and Spencer wasn’t sure if he should wake her, or let her sleep. He had work the next morning, and he still had to drive her home. Using his best judgement, he gently shook her awake. Her eyes flickered open. 

“Oh my god.” Her voice cracked. “I am so sorry!” She rubbed her eyes. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep-” Cate croaked, her voice thick from just waking up. 

“Um, want me to take you home?” Spencer’s arm fell to his side. Cate nodded, rising from the couch. She gathered her things, and grabbed her glasses off the coffee table. Spencer grabbed his keys and the two walked down to his car. The ride was again silent, save for the classical music playing from the speakers. Cate was trying really hard not to fall asleep again with the lull of the car. When they reached The Empty Mug, Cate grabbed her basket and Spencer watched from in the car as she unlocked the door. He wanted to wait until she was safely inside for him to drive away, he knew all too well of the evils of the world, thanks to his job. 

Cate awoke the next morning, no message from Spencer. She really hoped the events of last night didn’t negate their trip to the Smithsonian. She had the day off and she had organized all her things in Marta’s room, while Shrimp watched from Marta’s bed. While she was at it, she also cleaned up some of Marta’s things. 

Spencer felt more tired this day than usual at work. His late night was getting the better of him. His colleagues had already pointed out his tired eyes. He didn’t even stop for coffee at the cart this morning. He felt too nervous to call Cate or leave a voice message. He enlisted the help of Penelope to buy tickets to the Literature Exhibit of the Smithsonian for him and Cate. When Penelope questioned the other ticket, she knew it was for the coffee cart girl. She phoned Derek about the update on Spencer’s relationship as soon as Spencer left her batcave. 

The day dragged on and they had no new cases coming in. Spencer was stuck at his desk with paperwork for previous cases. He was stuck with his thoughts as he hand wrote case notes. He watched eagerly for the clock to signal the end of his shift. While scurrying out, Derek caught him. 

“Where are you off to?” He raised one of his well-groomed eyebrows. Spencer stuttered.

“Home.” he said too quickly.

“Come on, Reid.” Derek walked with him to the elevator. “You know I know about the tickets.” Spencer should have known that Penelope would share the information with Derek. “You got a hot date with the coffee girl?” he smirked.

“No, we’re just going to the museum to see the new exhibit. She might have called it a date, but I-” before Spencer could go off on a tangent, Derek cut him off.

“Good luck,” and clapped him on the shoulder. “Have a good time, regardless of if it's a date or not.” Derek smiled at Spencer. In the elevator he decided to call Cate, to see if she was available for the museum tonight. The phone line rang a few times. Spencer felt discouraged, it would go to voicemail after the next ring.

“Hi,” Cate answered. 

“Hi.” Spencer said back. He took a breath. “Are you busy tonight? I got tickets to that exhibit. If you can’t, it’s fine, don’t worry-” 

“I’m free tonight.” Cate cut him off. “Pick me up at six?” Spencer had just enough time to run home and change before picking her up at six.

“Perfect.” He smiled. He fished his keys out of his messenger bag and unlocked his car. “See you then.” Cate repeated his words and they hung up, both excited, yet jittery with nerves.

The museum was bigger than Cate imagined. Their tickets were specifically for the book exhibit, which was located in one of the libraries which was a smaller building. Cate and Spencer walked side by side through the library. Spencer looked at each display, and read off the excerpt for Cate. Cate would nod, and occasionally ask questions. The air seemed thick with tension. There was a bigger question looming in the air above them. Was this truly a date? Or was this two friends, who were both interested in books, enjoying time together? 

Spencer wasn’t sure how to transition this friendship to something more. Did they already have more? He felt confused. He felt guilty, he didn’t want the awkwardness to ruin Cate’s time at the museum. 

Cate knew something was up. Spencer was acting weird. He seemed very much in his head tonight. Cate tried to stir conversations through questions, but Spencer answered them all literally and left no room for discussion. Cate was beginning to feel as though she had been misreading their friendship the past week or so. 

They walked through the entire exhibit after a few hours. The air in the library reminded Cate of Spencer’s apartment. It was warm, and the same humidity. The perfect climate for books, Cate recalled from their conversation when he helped save her books. Cate’s face was feeling warm, she shouldn’t have worn a jacket. She took it off, holding it in front of her; it was folded over her arms. 

Spencer, too, felt his face grow warm. His cardigan was making him feel sweaty. It was either that, or the nervousness he felt when he was around Cate. He felt her brush up against his side, he wasn’t sure whether it was purposeful or an accident. He could hear their footsteps echo in the huge library. The exhibit would be closing soon, and most of the visitors were making their way out.

“What are you thinking?” Cate asked, Spencer tried to form a sentence as she brushed up against his side again. He still couldn’t tell if she did it on purpose.

“Um, just about the books. They’re mainly classics. I’ve read most of them. We could’ve just stood in front of my bookshelves and seen the same thing.” He muttered. Cate smiled. 

“Oh, you really have a first edition of The House of Mirth?” Cate teased. Spencer chuckled. 

“Okay, maybe I don’t have the exact copies, but I do have pretty old editions.” The more the two laughed and joked, the more normal it felt between them.

Spencer drove her home, and for the first time, Cate reached for the radio knob and changed the station. Soft rock filled the car. Cate hummed along quietly. Spencer parked along the street in front of The Empty Mug. He just about jumped out the car to open Cate’s door for her. He even walked her to the glass front door of the shop. The two stood facing each other. 

“So,” Cate started. “This was fun. Thanks for inviting me.” She smiled at Spencer.

“You’re welcome, I’m glad you came with me.” Spencer pursed his lips together. They both nodded at each other. Cate turned to reach for the door, but something came over Spencer and he grabbed her arm and spun her to face him. He leaned forward and quickly kissed Cate square on the mouth. She barely had any time to react when he pulled away just as fast. Without waiting for her to say anything, he got in his car and waited for her to enter the building. 

Once inside, Cate touched her lips in disbelief. As she turned to look outside at Spencer’s car, he was already driving off. Cate turned around again, and rushed upstairs to tell Marta exactly what had just happened.

[thegreatestofheck]

The Sun, The Moon, and The Stars ✯Prince Zuko✯

warnings - i’m not really sure how to say it, but she’s a water tribe girl in the fire nation, so there definitely is some racism/mocking of culture at a few points, but I tried to keep it to a minimum. if you think I portrayed something inaccurately please let me know. I don’t want to be putting out harmful material.  synopsis - She is a non-bender from the Northern Water Tribe who somehow found herself smack in the middle of Fire Nation central, where a young prince is fighting an internal battle she hopes to help him win.  a/n - So, uh, I have so many obx requests in my inbox and I have so many chapters to update of all my fics but instead, I decided to write an atla fic because I have no self control. thanks that’s all. 

***

How you ended up working as a servant in the Fire Nation palace, you had no idea. One day, you and your mom were spending the day in your canoe, and the next, you were on one of the smog machines that the Fire Nation called “ships”. You thought you were going to die. Somehow, you wound up serving the princess instead. 

She liked to pinch your cheeks and poke fun at your brown eyes. Hers were amber colored, like the flames that flickered from the bronze sconces that were the only source of light at night in the palace. She liked to make fun of the way your hair looped and how you were always too hot, too uncomfortable in the revealing red clothing that they forced you to wear. Azula was her name, but she made you call her Highness. 

You were two years older than her but you were always at her beck and call. Her friends were hardly better. While they didn’t pick fun at you or insult your culture, they sure did nothing to stop her torture of you. But you couldn’t fight back. All you could do was sit there and smile and do what she said, praying that your complacency would keep your mother, wherever she was, alive. 

The prince, however, he was different. Even before his banishment, he was always kind to you. As much as the Fire Nation royals had done to you, your family, and your tribe, you couldn’t bring yourself to hate him. 

He would smile when you passed by him in the corridor and never called for a guard when you accidentally ran into him. On the rare occasions you had to serve him, he would ask how your day was and he would help you where he could before his sister intervened. You once asked him why he treated you with respect. He told you it was because his mom taught him that everything that breathed was important and deserving of the same respect given to him. 

And on the day you told him that you hadn’t spoken to your mother in over a year, he promised that he would find her and find a way to reunite you with her. In spite of your better judgement, you felt a glimmer of hope. 

The next day, the young prince was banished after he lost an Agni Kai with his father. 

You never got to say goodbye. 

Three years passed. Three years of living at Princess Azula’s beck and call. Without the Prince and without her mother, she was nearly unstoppable. Her taunts grew more frequent, her hatred more vile. And then her friends left, Mai to live with her family and Ty Lee to join the circus. That left Azula bored with nothing to do but make your life misery. For three years you waited and suffered in silence. 

But then she left and you were all alone. There was no one to serve, no one to scream at you, no one to tug on your braids that you worked so hard to put in every morning. You spent your days wandering the halls of the palace you were never allowed to leave, hoping beyond reason to find your mother. 

But you never did. 

You were surprised with the Princess returned because she was no longer alone. Not only were Mai and Ty Lee by her side once again, but her brother, the exiled prince, trailed behind them. His chest was puffed, his chin was held high, the permanent reminder of his father’s hatred toward him worn proudly on his face. He looked defeated. 

When he saw you, standing there, breathless at the sight of him, he almost smiled and that look of defeat was almost like a victory. 

Three years ago, he had been just a scared boy who had shown a little bit of kindness to a girl he didn’t even know. He was older now, grown. His hair was longer and his eyes were a thousand times more haunted. You watched him walk into the palace, his eyes almost glued to you until he was out of sight. 

Life seemed to return to normal for all of an hour. Mai, Ty Lee, and Azula were lounging in the garden, ordering you back and forth for things they just kept laying by their side. 

“You wanna know what I heard about your dearest tribe?” Azula teased, her high pitched voice an unpleasent sound to your ears. You knew better than to respond head on and you knew better than to say no. She sounded too happy for it to be anything good. Still, you missed your home. You nodded your head slowly. Azula snickered to her friends just as Prince Zuko walked in, his eyes downcast. 

“That princess of yours died in our raid,” Azula sneered. Your heart started to pound against your rib cage, breathing going ragged. It couldn’t be true. Yue was blessed by the moon spirit. There was no way she would just...die. She was your friend, even if you had been nothing more than a fisherman’s daughter. You looked up toward Zuko, who had gone suddenly rigid, his face dangerously still. 

“And you’ll never guess who got her killed.” Azula stood up, walking toward you as you stood frozen. “Do you wanna know who got your precious princess killed?” 

“Azula.” Zuko’s words were a warning, but Azula just giggled by your ear. 

“Ask me who got her killed, y/n.” 

“Azula, that’s enough.” 

“Go on, ask me.” 

“Who got Princess Yue killed?” The sound of your own voice was foreign to you, never using it often, but you hoped there was some semblance of strength behind what you said. 

She traced a delicate finger across your shoulder before flicking it off toward her brother. Your eyes followed her movement, landing on Zuko. For a moment, you desperately wanted to believe it wasn’t true. The boy who had helped you clean up the messes Azula left behind would never kill your princess. The boy who had taken you to the Healers because his sister had burned you in her fury would never do something so horrible. 

“That’s not what happened-” 

“Ah, Zuzu, don’t be humble!” Azula’s laugh was trill as she plopped back into the grass beside her friends. But you didn’t care what she did anymore. Your gaze was fixed on Zuko, trying to figure out where you had gone wrong judging his character. “Don’t forget, you also killed the Avatar.” 

If you had thought your heart had been shattered before, this was the final blow. You had heard the rumors of the Avatar’s return. Knowing he was the only thing that stood between the Fire Nation and the safety of your home, you had relied on him, often dreaming that he would come to rescue you and your mother. With him dead, all hope of standing against the Fire Nation was dashed. 

You had often wished you were a bender, thinking that it may have spared you from living under the cruelty of the Fire Nation leaders. But there was never a time that you wished you were a bender so much as now, hoping nothing more than to be able to evaporate the shameful tears that fell from your eyes. 

“Aw, look,” Azula cooed as her friends watched on. “The little servant girl is crying for her dear princess and that Avatar. How sweet.” 

You didn’t care about the repercussions. You didn’t care what would happen to you. You needed to leave. You needed to get away from her, from them, from him. As far away as you possible could. 

Dropping the silver platter that was in your hands, you turned away and ran as fast as your trembling legs would take you. 

“y/n, wait!” 

“Don’t go after her, Zuko,” Mai’s dull and apathetic voice said. 

“y/n!” He didn’t appear to be listening. 

“I think you may have gone too far that time, Azula,” Ty Lee said, her voice quiet and timid. You didn’t hear much after that, turning to corner and making your way down the corridor. You could hear Prince Zuko’s pounding footsteps following after you, but you ignore him every time he called your name. 

Just as you turned a corner, you found yourself with a face full of red robes. Sucking in a gasp, you stepped back. You blinked away tears to find yourself standing before the Fire Lord himself and you froze in place, eyes wide. 

You had only met the Fire Lord once. It was a moment you would never forget and the most reoccurring nightmare you had. 

“Why are you crying?” He asked. You swallowed a lump in your throat and quickly wiped away your tears. 

“I wasn’t, sire,” you said, straightening your back. 

“Don’t lie to me.” He didn’t raise his voice, but you flinched anyway. 

“I, oh, I-” 

“Father!” Prince Zuko ran up beside you, struggling for breath as he bowed before the Fire Lord. “It was Azula, Father.” 

“My daughter made you cry?” The Fire Lord looked down at you with fury in his eyes. 

“No, Your Highness-”

“So, you’re calling my son a liar?”

“No, no! I just-” 

“Just what? Spit it out, girl!” 

“It’s been a long day, Father,” Prince Zuko interrupted, putting a hand on your shoulder. “I would like your permission to give y/n the day off. Azula has been working her like a dog and she needs a break.” 

The Fire Lord looked down at you, raising an eyebrow. You nodded slowly, confirming Prince Zuko’s story. You had barely slept since Azula had returned, running errands for her at every time of the night and the day. It was easier at night, sure, but when the sun rose, the exhaustion hit you all over again. 

“For you success at the Northern Water Tribe and in Ba Sing Se, I will grant you this,” the Fire Lord said. You suddenly remembered why you had been crying, why you had been trying so hard to get away from the Prince to begin with. 

“Thank you, Father.” 

Lost somewhere in your own grief, you almost forgot to bow to the Fire Lord before he walked away. As soon as he was out of sight, you made a break for it once again. This time, Prince Zuko was prepared and caught you by the wrist. 

“Azula always lies,” he said once you were facing him again. You tried to pull your wrist from his grip, but he was strong. 

“I know what breed your sister is,” you seethed, never before having spoken to a royal in the way you were now. “You and her are cut from the same cloth.” 

“No,” Prince Zuko said, his grip on your wrist tightening for just a moment before he relaxed it again. “No, we’re not. I didn’t kill your princess and I didn’t....” He lowered his voice and took a step closer to you, making you recoil. “I didn’t kill the Avatar.” 

“Then what happened?”

Prince Zuko looked around, as if trying to see if anyone was listening in. He then let your wrist go and beckoned for you to follow him. For a moment, you thought about running again, but as Prince Zuko started to walk away, your only chance at answers walked with him. 

Tiptoeing after him, you followed as he led you back toward his chambers. Sending one last glance around to check for guards, he guided you inside. 

“If this is some long ploy to get me into your bed....” You weren’t sure where your sudden boldness was coming from. Maybe it was the deep rooted anger finally bubbling forth. Maybe it was the fact that, despite everything, you somehow trusted the boy in front of you. 

Your bitter words earned you an amused smile from the Prince, which you hadn’t expected in the slightest. 

“No, y/n. I want to explain myself to you.” 

“Why?” 

“Because it would be nice to know that there was one person alive who didn’t hate me.” 

His words caught you off guard. The anger in your stomach dissipated and you dropped your hands to your sides. There was a smile on his face, but grief in his eyes. 

“Tell me what happened.” 

He brought you over to a table and sat in front of you. He started shakily, stumbling over his words, backtracking, trying to find the right place to really begin his story. But once he got there, the words flowed from his mouth and never stopped. Not until he told you about the battle at the Northern Water Tribe and Princess Yue’s fate, not until he told you about defecting with his Uncle and living in Ba Sing Se as Lee, not until he told you about the sickness his body went through after making one good choice, not until he told you about how he betrayed everyone who trusted him and let his sister kill the Avatar. 

You were crying again by the time he finished. Part of it was hearing all of the things that happened to your people, to the Water Tribe siblings who were helping the Avatar, but the other part was watching the boy in front of you cry too. He had been a boy when he left and you thought he had come back like his father. But you realized as you watched him now, face buried in his hands, that Prince Zuko was four times the man his father could ever be. 

“And none of that excuses what I’ve done,” he said, his voice haggard as he looked back up at you. “I know that.” 

“Have you...have you spoken to your uncle?” You asked, clearing your throat of the thick emotion that choked you. 

“A few times. He won’t even speak to me. He hates me.” 

“From what you told me about him, I doubt he could ever hate you.” 

His amber eyes met yours and for a brief moment, you felt your stomach twist. You should hate him. You should hate him for everything his nation had done to your people, for the way his sister treated you, for the way his father had separated you and your mother. But you didn’t. You couldn’t. 

“I don’t deserve your kindness,” he said. His voice went quiet. “After everything we have done to you-”

“I get to decide who is deserving of my kindness,” you told him firmly. “Your family has torn mine apart. They have brutalized my people, murdered my kin, and your sister has made the last years of my life a living hell.” 

Prince Zuko hung his head. You breathed out a calming breath and leaned forward, putting a gentle hand against his shoulder. 

“But you are not your sister.” You spoke just above a whisper. He looked back up at you suddenly. “And you are not your father. You are not the crimes of your people. I believe that you can still make things right.” 

“How?” He asked, voice breaking. “The Avatar is dead. What hope does the world have against the wrath of my father?” 

“I can’t tell you how to fix your own problems,” you said. “I can only tell you that if there’s a will, there’s a way.” 

You were shocked to see him almost smile. 

“You sound like my uncle.” 

“I’ll take that as a compliment.”

He stood then, his chest puffed out, his chin held high, the scar on his face worn like a badge of honor. He looked triumphant. You stood as well, knowing it was rude to sit while someone else was standing. Prince Zuko took your hands in his and gave them a tight squeeze. You felt the urge to tug your hands away as your stomach tumbled again. 

“I made you a promise long ago that I would find your mother. I haven’t forgotten it.” 

“Your Highness, you don’t have to-”

“Please.” His hands tightened around yours again. “After all of your kindness despite the hatred in this place, it’s the least I could do. I will find your mother and then I will find a way to get you both out of here and back home.” 

Tears shimmered in your eyes and you struggled to keep them at bay. 

“I- Thank you, Your Highness.” 

“There’s no need for formalities. Just call me Zuko.” 

Zuko. Your lips twitched into a small smile, the familiar feeling of hope bursting into your chest. Your hope had seemed to die many times, but like a flame, it always smoldered. It was the only thing that kept you alive, the only thing that kept your spirit burning. 

“Zuko,” you said and he smiled, a toothy smile that any normal boy would give any normal girl in any normal situation. 

“y/n.” 

He leaned forward quickly and pressed his lips gently against your cheek. It was a brief kiss, more like the sealing of a promise than anything else, but it was enough to send bolts of lightning through your body and into your toes. When he pulled away, you knew your cheeks were flushed with heat, but you found that his were too. 

“I should....” You pulled your hands from his, trying not to wipe the sweat your palms accumulated on your skirt. “I should go find Azula.” 

“You have the day off, remember?” 

You shook your head. 

“I should get back to her.” You stepped around him and started for the door. 

“I’ll find your mother,” he called after you, as if you still needed convincing that he was serious. “Whatever it takes.”

“I trust you, Zuko,” you said, standing half way through the door. “I don’t know why, but I trust you.” 

~~~

So, I guess I’ll make a separate taglist for atla things just in case any obx people don’t want to be tagged in it. 

also, part 2 potentially? 

[heycallmeladytypewriter]

The Call of a Siren

Chapter One

She could not, for the life of her, find her goddamn charger. If she was going to make it the rest of the stupid day without music in her ears which blocked out most of the annoyances, she’d flip a table. Or she would when it was finally unloaded from the moving van on the street. 

“Cordelia, would you please come get your brother!” Her mother shrilled from the bottom of the steps. 

Delia sighed and flipped off the boxes stacked in her room who refused to give her back her charger before stomping down the stairs. Her little brother, Henry, was tugging on her mother's hair and yelling nonsense only a toddler of age three could understand. She walked past her mother and went straight to the luggage bags from the flight next to the doorway. Spotting her purple carry on, she rummaged through until she found some fruit snacks she packed but never ate. Coming back over, Cordelia waved them in Henry’s face until he took notice and reached for the snack. 

Grabbing Henry from her mother and putting him on her hip, “ Mom what do you want me to do with him? Fruit snacks are gonna last about two minutes.”

Her mother threw up her hands, “ I don’t know! Just keep him occupied until we have everything in the house.” 

Rolling her eyes, Cordelia fed him a fruit snack one at time trying to buy time until she thought of what to do with him. Most of his toys were still packed and the ones he had on the plane were of no use now as he was now done with them after a 14 hour flight from the States to Japan. Pursing her lips, she thought about seeing a playground not too far from here on the drive. 

“Mom, I’m taking Henry for a walk around. Be back in a bit.” Her mother nodded and waved her off from the kitchen. 

After wrangling Henry’s shoes and light jacket on, they set off with him still in her arms as she didn’t know where the stroller was in that mess which was her new life. Henry was lightly tugging on her hair and quietly babbling as she walked towards the small playground down the street. She already missed home. Well, previous home as she bounced around enough to never really know one place as home. Army brat problems, she thought with slight disdain. Well actually, detective/police brat? Is there even a word for that?

Her dad was former military but since the age of heroes, the military need was still there of course but not as much as it used to be. Her dad decided to go into police work afterwards when she was seven and has since climbed into a detective which made her mother happy as he was more or less off the streets but still dealt with the hardships of the job. Her mother was actually the one to want to move from the States to Musutafu, Japan. 

Thanks to the number one hero, All Might, crime in Japan has lessened significantly which made it a safer place to live in her mom’s eyes. It also helped that her mother had grown up in Tokyo when she was younger before her parents decided to move to Chicago. 

Cordelia didn’t have anything against Musutafu but it still was another move, another restart, another everything which isn't too fun when you are fifteen. 

“Del, we go swing?” A little voice broke her train of thought as she saw them reaching the playground. She smiled at his nickname for her as he couldn’t pronounce her full name yet. Sometimes it was ‘Del’ or ‘la’ but both always made her smile as it was so cute. 

“Sure, bud.” She walked over to the swings and placed him in the little toddler seat. “Ready?” Henry squealed and kicked his feet in excitement. “Ye-es!” 

Cordelia started to push him, preparing to do this for some time as Henry could be in the swing for the whole time. It definitely qualified as a workout.

“Tch, stupid Deku.” Cordelia glanced over to see a blonde boy angrily muttering to himself while kicking a rock on the sidewalk. He was wearing some kind of school uniform but all rumpled like he had some kind of fight or fall before walking home. 

“Del, keep pushin’!” Henry’s voice broke the silence. She didn’t realize she stopped after watching the boy on the sidewalk. “Sorry, buddy.” She murmured before resuming as she didn’t want to call attention to the fact she was being nosy. 

“Oi, what are you looking at?!” The angry boy had unfortunately caught that and was now facing her. 

“I’m not looking at anything. Just pushing my brother.” She replied coolly. 

“That's what I thought, extra.” 

Extra? What was that? “Actually, I was looking at you. Rough day, buddy?” Cordelia shouldn’t have goaded him, a complete stranger, but what the hell was calling her ‘extra?’

“Shut the fuck up!” 

“Hey, child present!” Cordelia waved around her brother. Thankfully, Henry didn’t seem to care as long as he was swinging. 

“Tch. He can mind his damn business too!” With that, he flipped us off. So she did too. Then he walked off, looking madder than before. Weirdly, she wanted to laugh. 

-------------------------------------------

After they got back to the house, Cordelia took her slices of pizza that her mother had ordered and slipped upstairs to organize her things a bit more and hopefully locate her freaking charger. Her room was towards the back and furthest from anybody else which she preferred with windows facing the small backyard and back alley street behind the houses. Quiet and isolated with the ability to blast her music a bit without getting yelled at as she liked. She wasn’t a complete loner but did like her space from her nosy family. 

She closed the door and plugged in her small dinky radio in, orange and covered in faded stickers from over the years, and found a decent radio station to unpack. Placing her hands on her hips, she faced the boxes and nodded. “ Okay, here we go.” She said sternly to herself. “Don’t get distracted by every little thing and get it over with.” 

It was three a.m by the time she got done but she was much further than before. There were still a few scattered boxes she stacked in the corner to deal with later but the essentials and whatnot were out and placed. 

Figuring she earned a break, she took out a bowl of water she filled earlier and placed it on her nightstand while sitting criss cross applesauce on her bed. 

Breathing deep, she raised her fingers towards the bowl and the water lifted out and into the air. 

Cordelia took her time and played with the water, trying to manipulate it into shapes before settling on her go-to weapon: a water whip of sorts. She had earlier set up her old stuffed animals along the furniture in the room and tried to knock them down one by one. 

Unfortunately, she whipped too strongly and made a divot in the wall and cut her teddy bear's arm off. 

“Aw crap. Sorry Mr. Tubbs.” Whipping the water back into the bowl, she sadly picked up the teddy’s arm off the floor  and then looked at the damage on the wall. “Yikes. Gonna cover that up with a poster..” Her dad will kill her for practicing in the house again since she usually damages something. 

Cordelia went to one of her leftover boxes to find something to tape on the wall when she found a paper she forgot about crumpled on top. 

U.A ENTRANCE EXAM APPLICATION

Biting her lip, she looked over her application she had printed before flying here. That was the one thing she was looking forward to with moving here: to be accepted in one of the world’s top hero schools. She wanted to be a hero more than anything. Unfortunately, her family did not share that dream nor like them very much. Her eyes flicked over to her family’s picture on her dresser, taken a few months ago on Henry’s third birthday, and sighed. Her mother, a prom queen in her day, had her arms around her dads buffed up arm with her wavy dark hair in a long plait down her shoulder. Her dad stood tall and proud over little Henry in his crooked yellow party hat while her sister, Josephine, grabbed their mother’s other arm. Like her mother, Josie held a sort of grace even in a casual stance and small smile with her hair pulled back in a tight ponytail. Delia stood slightly off to the side, hair unbound and free flowing in the wind, and was held tied to the picture by only Henry’s small hand in hers as if to keep her in place. 

Her mother had a quirk of healing small cuts and wounds with water which helped since she was a nurse in the ER. Nothing to scoff at, in Cordelia’s opinion. Her father had a quirk of weapons; particularly the knowledge of them and how they work. Again, nothing to scoff at especially considering his line of work. Her older sibling, Josephine, took after their father but instead of weapons, it was machines like a typewriter or an air conditioner. Pretty useful but she decided that a career in accounting was for her. They didn’t speak much. 

Despite having quirks, they resented them. They believed the world would be better without them and hero work was not a true profession to aspire for. Thus, a discovery of your quirk at a young age wasn’t anything to celebrate nor was it encouraged to practice and train other than the bare minimum of control. That did not stop her from wanting to be a hero. Everything about it seemed amazing. She would collect articles about them and hide them in the back of her closet along with a poster or two. She’d watch videos on the internet about all the top heroes and wonder how she could be just like them. 

 Getting her parents to agree to this...would be so hard. Hence why she printed the paper but never filled it out. 

She stared at the divot in the wall for a moment before sighing and placing the paper back in the box. 

____________________________________________________________

After only having slept a measly three hours, Cordelia gave up and put on some shorts and a tank top. She snuck outside as her parents and brother would be getting ready soon and she wasn’t ready for any human interaction yet. She was not a morning person in the slightest. 

She favorited her new home’s address in her phone since she didn't know the neighborhood or have a specific route around yet. Then she set off. 

After thirty minutes of light running, she came upon a beach. A sign on a big rock read ‘Dagoba Municipal Beach Park.’ Cordelia felt her heart explode with joy at the sight. Water was close to her. No, the ocean was close to her!

“Oh my god!” She shrieked to herself. She found her place. This is where she would practice and train and just be and just...breathe. She jogged down the steps to the sand and couldn’t stop herself from giggling from pure happiness. The only sad part was the mountain of random trash and junk off to the left of her on the beach. Hell, maybe she’d move it all just to clear more space or put in a request to the city as she saw refrigerators and car pieces which looked way too heavy for her to just lug. 

All of a sudden, a giant boom and junk flew outward causing her to yelp and duck out of the way as a toaster almost took her head off. 

“The hell..?” She marched over to the source and stopped cold. A skinny boy looking around her age with a mess of green hair stood in a clearing in the mess. Her brain could only notice that much about him as her focus was being pulled to the shock before the boy. 

All Might.

All Might was in front of her.

ALL MIGHT WAS STANDING IN FRONT OF HER.

HOLY AJKFC SHIT!!

Cordelia couldn’t breathe. The number one hero in the world was right there and this boy was familiar with him enough to have a conversation. Holy wow. Thankfully, she was hidden by some of the junk so they didn’t seem to see her. 

“..towards being a hero.”

“Um..All this?” The boy looked back worriedly at the junk piled all around him. “But..There’s so much. That’s impossible!”

“ Young Midoriya, you wanna go to UA, right?” 

“Well, yeah. Of course! You went there. So it must be the best school around, right? It’s a long shot but still..I’m going to shoot for the moon.” She smiled at the sound of how earnest he was to try. To be honest, it made her want to try to despite her family’s lack of support. 

“You’ve got a lot of spirit, fanboy! But, as I’ve mentioned before, Heroeing isn’t easy to do without a quirk. It’s not fair but that's the reality. UA is the hardest hero course to get into. So that means..”

“..that I have to prepare my body for your Quirk really fast. UA’s exam is in ten months!” 

Ten months. 

Backing away slowly, she turned and ran back to the stairs to grab her shoes before running home. 

By the time she got home, she had made up her mind. 

After her shower, she grabbed the crumpled application out of the box and a pen off her desk. 

She wanted to go to UA and just like the boy on the beach, she was going to shoot for the moon.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A/N: Hey guys! I decided to take a shot at a fanfiction I’ve had in my head for a while with everyone’s favorite (especially my favorite) angry boy. I could use some beta readers and maybe some coverart if anyone is willing?? Feedback is more than welcome and I plan on updating at least once a week! 

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #401

“my love is just waiting to turn your tears to roses”

Do you typically do your makeup the same each time? Or do you like to change it up often? IF I wear makeup, it's essentially always the same. Who is the last person you were in a room with just the two of you? What were you doing? Yesterday with Mom. We were trying to find the best deal on Eco Earth, a substrate we're getting for Venus. What was the last really good book you read, and what was it about? If we're talking REALLY good book, then The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood. In short summary, it's a dystopian future novel where women are now basically just objects used only for repopulation, even having their names stripped from them. They follow very strict rules as society has returned to horrible misogyny. As a woman, the "oh my god, this is possible" aspect of it is terrifying, and it causes such a sense of disgust and urge to ensure women rights always continue to be fought for. Do you feel safe in your country? For the most part, I'd say. I guess. There are places I'd feel safer, though. How many meals do you eat a day? Three. Have you ever performed a solo dance in front of a crowd? No, but I was supposed to my senior year in high school; the seniors at my dance studio were always welcome to do a solo in celebration. Mine was a modern dance to "Coma White" by Marilyn Manson, wanting to tell a story about depression and how being medicated could feel, but I eventually decided like halfway through learning the choreography that I was just too nervous to do a solo. Have you ever sung a solo? No. When you go to McDonalds, what drink do you usually get? Coke. Have you ever had to call and complain about a product you bought? No. Do you own a designer purse? Definitely not. I'm not wasting that much money on something like that. What’s the weirdest rumor you’ve ever heard about yourself? Apparently, Jason and I had a baby in high school even though I was obviously never pregnant. To my knowledge, it was started by his ex. Who is now a good friend of mine lmaooo. Life is funny. What was your favorite Saturday morning cartoon growing up? Pokemon, of course. Would you ever have an affair? Nope. Would you ever have a one night stand? Nope. Where you present at any major historical events (e.g. 9/11)? No. What are your opinions on marijuana legalization? Legalize it, but treat it similarly to alcohol in that driving under the influence is illegal and punishable, and I believe you should be of a certain age. How about abortion? I am pro-choice. I was pro-life most of my own life, but now I am very firm about a mother being able to choose if she wants to endure a pregnancy or not. Like, that is a MASSIVE life event that almost inevitably changes - and sometimes traumatizes - people. I do believe a fetus is its own body and not part of the mother's, but rather in the mother's, but the belief that a woman decides what she wants in her body is her choice, too. I'm not very fond of people treating abortion as a simple, regular form of birth control, like it's nothing but an "lol whoops," but I still believe it is ultimately her decision, and she should always be free of judgment for doing what is best for her. Do you wear skirts or dresses more often? Neither. I wouldn't dare wear a skirt more so, though. What do you think about tipping at restaurants? There should always be an expected minimum, imo, unless the person was truly, sincerely, genuinely fucking awful. Waiters do not have an easy job, fight me about it, and they're just trying to survive while putting on a happy, jovial face, all the while dealing with hungry people who can be such assholes. I believe the actual tip should relate to actual service, but again, give them something. Would you ever get back together with any of your exes? One, absolutely. The other would take a shitload of consideration and proper communication on his part. Do you have a preferred coffee brand? No, because I don't like coffee. Do you usually befriend your coworkers, or do you prefer to keep work separate from your personal life? IF I had a job, I'd like to build a friendship with those I have to engage with almost every day. What is something you frequently forget? Dates, ages, names, what I was about to do five seconds before I forgot... Pretty much everything. My memory is frightfully poor. Is there any drama currently going on with your family? No. When you take a nap, do you nap in bed or on the couch? In my bed. Were you raised by both of your parents? If not, then who raised you? Both; my parents split when I was somewhere around 17, though, but I'd say there wasn't much more "raising" to do at that age. Have you ever stolen anything? If so, why? No. Have you ever plagiarized someone else's work? Hell no. What's your most-used mode of transportation? My mom's car. Have you ever taught someone else a useful skill? Not to my recollection. Does seeing everyone else's 'perfect lives' posted on social media ever bring you down or affect how you feel about yourself? It actually does, honestly. Not ALWAYS, but if I'm being honest, it does most of the time. I've contemplated deleting Facebook for that reason, but with is also comes things that make me happy, and I think I'd feel even more isolated without it. What is your favorite Hostess/Little Debbie snack? This is SO impossible for me to answer. I loooove Hostess and Little Debbie treats. I want to say honeybuns, but I also love those chocolate cupcakes with the white swirls on top, as well as Twinkies. Very few exist that I don't like. Do you/your family buy loafs from the bakery or bagged on the shelf? We just buy bagged bread. What’s the best news you’ve gotten lately? My APAP mask is definitively WORKING!!!!! :') Mom got an app that connects to the machine via Bluetooth that monitors the effectiveness of the mask, evaluating many factors of your sleep, and it's detecting a definite decrease in disruptive behaviors or something like that. It is so, SO encouraging to know that. ^And, the worst? Hm. Oh, probably some news on something serious a good friend is going through, but I don't feel it's my right to disclose what. It's just a very worrying and potentially dangerous issue that I wish I could help her with. Would you rather receive (or give) flowers, chocolates or jewelry? I'd appreciate any, but my fat ass is drawn to the chocolate, ha ha. What *I* would give would vary depending on what the person liked. How do you feel about coconut? Smells lovely, but is otherwise gross. ^ Ever cracked one open? No, but omg I've always wanted to, haha. What’s the best thing about being your gender? I guess the fact it's more "normal" and "accepted" to show our emotions. Fuck that generalization, though. I don't give a shit what your gender is, you experiencing emotions is NORMAL and welcomed to be expressed. ^ And the worst thing? The ability to be raped and impregnated by it. Do you do your part to save the earth? I don't do nearly enough. :/ We recycle, but that's about it. Well, none of us DARE to litter either, but I still don't feel like it's as much as the earth deserves from its denizens. Who do you think should have their portrait on a bill? I don't know or care. Why did you last feel exhausted? Yesterday was my niece's birthday, and I spent essentially ALL day playing with her and her brother. I have a very limited battery when it comes to kids, and I was running on empty for hours. My anxiety was SO high and I really needed a break from them, but they're too young to really understand that Aunt Britt can only socially run for so long before I'm completely burnt out, and TRUST ME, I was there for sure. I didn't want them to think they did something wrong, you know? I just had to keep going. I slept like a baby last night though for sure, haha. Have you ever used emotional blackmail to get your own way? Wow, no. Has anybody ever used emotional blackmail on you? No. Who did you last worry about and why? Sara for health reasons. Are you currently looking for a new place to live? Not actively, but Mom and I definitely want to move. We feel very out-of-place here in the suburbs. Which would you prefer as a view; mountains or the sea? Mountains. Do you have a mouse for your laptop? (Assuming you have a laptop) Yes. I canNOT play games with a trackpad. Do you apologize a lot? Extremely excessively. When you get married what do you think you’ll put most of your focus and money into? Do you mean like, for the wedding? In that case, probably the venue. Being a photography buff, I want a place I think is really pretty to have pictures taken. What’s something you complain about frequently? My legs hurting, my weight, and being hot. Do you have anything planned for the summer? Nope, and that's fine with me. I'd rather stay inside away from the heat. Who usually makes dinner in your household? My ma. Do you have a blog? Just on Tumblr. Does anyone in your family snore loudly? My mother does because of gerd, and at least when my father still lived with us, he snored super loud, too. Do you want to fix anything with anyone? Yeah, a few people. What shows do you watch? Right now, only Meerkat Manor: Rise of the Dynasty. Whenever The Edge of Sleep comes out, I will 110% be watching that, too, because Mark is a key actor in it. :') Plus the concept seems super cool. Have you ever broken someone’s heart? I don't know. Who was the last person you had a conversation with on the phone? Me mum. Does the song you’re currently listening to remind you of anyone specific? No, given it has like... one lyric, haha. Do you own any TV show soundtracks? No. Last thing you did that made you feel like an adult? I mean I guess sign myself in at the doctor's. What’s your favorite picture of your mom? Dad? Oh my god, there's a candid one I got of Mom laughing when she was posing as my subject for a photography assignment, and I cherish it with ALL my heart. I want to share it with essentially the whole world, but yeah, I'm not gonna put my mom's picture here. As for my dad, I like this one I took of us at Red Lobster for his birthday a year or two back. Last TV show series you finished? Fullmetal Alchemist with Sara. Favorite flavor of cream cheese? Regular. What US state would you like to visit? Alaska. Last meal you made yourself? I put a chicken pesto thing in the microwave earlier for dinner.

[pbandjesse]

I have finally. Finally. Made it to the end of work. I have tomorrow off. It will be over entirely to quickly. But it will be okay.

Today was an excellent day though. I slept okay. And when I woke up at 7, James said I could sleep a couple more minutes. But I got up and got ready. I had to change my top because the pants I wore were lower the. I thought and I didn't want skin out. So I was slightly frustrated but it was fine.

James took me to get breakfast. And then we were at the museum.

It was a lot of fun. It wasn't horribly busy, and I only gave one real tour but I would give a lot of single rooms and half tours. It was pretty constant actually. And I had a blast.

We had volunteers there today cleaning and repairing machines. I love talking to old men and making them my best friends so I would end up doing just that. They always love that I know about metal working and building. And having navy and union facts always helps. I had so many laughs today. My favorite guy was named Dale. And then there was another who told me when he was a teenager he would deliver logs to a copper refinery that they would burn to get the oxygen out of the casting process. Amazing.

I also just had excellent guests. One guy who looked like an actor I like. I got to brag about my mom, because she knew about dark shadows and I got to be like. Oh yeah that's my mom she's the coolest. And talk about my dad and construction. I always feel like that kind of thing gives me a little bit of clout? Makes people know I know.

I had some fun conversations with people for the farmers market too. I am trying to do a bit of outreach and finding new venders to apply and I was able to give info to two different people today! One who makes stained glass and one who makes perfumes and textiles. Super cool. And I just had lovely conversations with them and got to share all my fun facts and knowledge.

I also got to walk around showing the new security guard the musuem. He was a sweetheart and was really excited about the museum and I wanted him to feel super welcome. So I showed him all around and told him lots of things. He would buy himself a t-shirt later and I just thought that was so sweet.

I watched the desk for a bit so James could go get lunch. I am not super comfortable with the register but I sold one set of tickets. And James came back before I was off talking to people again.

I forgot to take a break. But I held myself together. For the last half hour of the day we had a dad and adult son come in who had been here yesterday but wanted to see some machines. So I quickly ran them around turning things on and telling my stories. They really seemed to love it and that was awesome. I think I did a great job today and that was just a really awesome feeling after yesterday not being my most ideal and successful program.

I did get next week's schedule and I'm doing 3 canneries at least, with me leading one. Which is the first one. I wish it wasn't the first because I think I could benifit from seeing another. But it's okay. I will be alright.

We finished up the day. I finally ate my sandwich. And soon we headed home.

James ordered us pizza and we would pick that up on the way home. I was very tired all of a sudden, not shocking. Stanley had asked me earlier if I was okay because I was sort of zoning out.

I was very glad to be going home. When we got back the Pokemon plush James got me came. It's of my Squishie!! I love them very much. Both James and Squishie.

I would lay on the couch and play pokemon for a bit. I caught five new Pokemon. And then had pizza. James would edit their podcast and I went to lay in the hammock. James headed to the theater to do an hour of work. I took a bath. And was comfy in bed by the time they got home.

I am ready to brush my teeth and get ready to sleep. I hope you all have a great night. And that tomorrow is restful and soft. Love you all. Goodnight!

[ficklefics]

Who Needs Enemies - Chapter One: Trouble Never Stops

SEQUEL TO FRIENDS LIKE THESE

It’s only been a few months since Harleen’s birthday and her new normal is undoubtedly strange; her and Jerome’s lives are completely intertwined. It’s not quite a relationship, but they undoubtedly have a growing and twisted connection. For once in her life she is happy - until Jerome’s past begins to unravel and she discovers that he has been less than honest with her.

Jerome Valeska x Harleen Quinzel, Jeremiah Valeska x Harleen Quinzel

SERIES MASTERLIST ~ MASTERLIST

Beep! Beep! Beep!

I groan and roll over, slamming my hand onto the clock to silence the shrill alarm. I’ve barely slept, but if I was dreaming I don’t remember what.

Even after three months, it still feels strange to wake up in my empty childhood home.

My parents didn’t come back after they went to Norway. Instead, they moved to New York again – the only logical option from their perspective. They didn’t try to get me to join them; I guess they finally realised that there are far more reasons for me to stay than there are to go.

It’s a typical morning. I get dressed and go downstairs. First thing is to turn on the coffee machine. While it’s doing its thing I fill up Puddin’s food and water. She’s six months old now and reaches up to my knee; almost completely unrecognisable from the puppy I got last Christmas. I scratch behind her ears and stand back up, grabbing two mugs and filling them up with fresh coffee. The scent fills the room, making me sigh audibly.

Then comes the perfectly timed chapping at the back door. I turn around as Jerome comes in. “It really shocks me how punctual you are.” There’s no need for ‘hello’s’. “I’m a criminal, not disrespectful.” He scoffs. I grin, sliding his coffee over to him. He picks it up and takes a slow sip. “You seriously make the best coffee.” “Only because I have an expensive coffee machine.” I walk around the island between us to stand beside him. “Rich girl perks.” I shrug. He wraps an arm around me and squeezes my shoulders, making me giggle. “Guess that’s a good enough reason to keep you around.” “Very funny. You know you’re stuck with me.” I elbow him in the stomach, slightly harden than could be considered teasing. Jerome seems to consider the words for a moment before his grip tightens and I’m being spun around so the counter is pressed against my back and Jerome is leaning over me. “Maybe you’re the one who’s stuck with me.”

A few months ago this would have scared me – not anymore.

I give a smirk and, with a grab of his collar, spin us both around so that we’ve swapped and it’s my arms around him. “Are you sure about that?” “Someone’s confident.” “You know it.” I wink. He shakes his head with a smile before leaning down and kissing me.

His touch still sends electricity through every nerve in my body. My skin tingles. My heart races.

My arm slides away from me on the counter and knocks into one of the mugs. The sound of it smashing on the ground pulls us apart. Jerome laughs at the mess and I slap his shoulder before grabbing a dustpan and a paper towel to clean up the mess. “Thanks for the help,” I grumble as I drop the shards in the trash. “You looked like you had it handled.” “Sure.” I roll my eyes. “Oh, remember, no surprise visits tonight or tomorrow. Wren’s visiting, and she can’t find out about this.” “Not sure how I feel about being your dirty little secret, Harls.” “Deal with it.”

*

As soon as Wren and I are through the door I take off my heels and drop them haphazardly on the floor. She laughs at me and I make a face at her before leading the way into the front room. We collapse onto opposite couches, her facing the bay window and me facing the open doors to the dining room. Who would have thought dinner could be so exhausting?

“It feels weird being back.” She sighs, a melancholy smile on her face. “You’re telling me,” I laugh softly. “You’d think coming back after five years would be the big deal – not five months.” “Well, a lot more has happened in the five months I’ve been in England than the whole time we were in New York.” “That’s a good point.” She hesitates before she speaks again. “I’m glad life is back to normal.” I nod in agreement. “Things got scary for a bit.” “That feels like an understatement.” She rolls her eyes. “I didn’t think it was possible for someone to get kidnapped so much in six months.” “What can I say, I’m an overachiever.” “Hilarious.” She leans forward, an earnest look in her eyes. “It is all over though, right? He’s disappeared?” “Yup. I haven’t seen or heard of Jerome Valeska in months…” I trail off at the sight of the bastard in question frozen in the doors behind Wren. My eyes widen in sudden panic but I force myself to keep calm. “You okay?” She frowns at my sudden change in demeanour. “Oh, yeah, I’m fine, just thought I saw something.” She goes to turn and I panic again. “It’s nothing! It’s fine.” My outburst manages to keep her attention on me long enough for Jerome to disappear out of sight. I have no clue what he’s doing here. I am going to kill him.

*

It’s after midnight when Wren’s head starts to droop. We say our goodnights, and after locking the doors and checking that Jerome is actually gone, I head to my room.

As I’m getting changed I notice a scrap of paper on my desk that I know wasn’t there before. I pick it up and unfold it to find a name: ‘Zachary Trumble’ – Jerome’s uncle. My mind flickers back to Jerome and I, sat in that cell, waiting for death.

“It’s not cheery.” “Nothing is with you. Or everything is.” “Fine. So, when I was a kid, before I realised the world hated me, I had an uncle.” “Zach.” “Smart girl.” “Ha ha.” “Dear old mom’s brother. He was a cook at the circus, and he would bake too. Great at it. We used to try and steal cookies from him. One time, he caught me. Took my hand and shoved it in a pot of boiling stock. Practically cooked me down to the bone. Took months for the burns to heal. And I never forgot the smell of my own flesh boiling.” “I’m sorry.” “Don’t be. It’s funny.”

…

“You said, “we”. Did you have friends?” “Doesn’t matter.” “But -” “I said, it doesn’t matter!”

He never mentioned the story or his uncle again – it was very clearly off-limits. The note means nothing to me, so I drop it back on the desk and let myself fall into a restless sleep.

*

It’s 3am when the ringing of my phone wakes me up. I answer quickly, if only to shut it up. “Hello?” My voice is muddy and hoarse with sleep. “Hey.” It’s Jerome. I can hear sirens. “Look, I’m in trouble.” Now wide awake, I sit up, clutching the phone to my ear. “What’s happening? Do you need help?” “Nah, I’ll be fine. Did you see my note?” “You mean the very unhelpful one?” I glance over at it. “Yeah.” “I need you to find him. Any information you can.” The sirens are getting louder. “Look, I need to go. See ya’ later.” “Wait, Jerome -” Silence. He hung up. There’s nothing I can do.

CHAPTER TWO

[jiminthestreets-bonesinthesheets]

Pas De Deux - Chapter 3 (End)

Title: Pas De Deux

Fandom: Supernatural

Pairing: Destiel 

Rating: not really needed for this fluff lol

Tags: fluff, pretty much just a whole lot of fluff XD

Summary: Dean is a closeted ballet dancer, and Cas is playing the Nutcracker Prince in the Kansas State Ballet. When the ballet loses their Clara and Cas confronts Dean about taking the part along side him, will he be able to put aside his fears and let everyone know who he really is? All to help the man of his dreams?

MASTERLIST

AO3

*** My works are not to be posted on any sites without my permission! But comments and reblogs are love! <3 Please and thanks!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter Three

     He woke up to the sun blasting through a crack in his curtains, hitting him perfectly across the eyes. He rubbed his face as he slowly sat up in bed, feeling a bit better then he had when he first came home, and wondered how long he had slept. Looking at the clock and seeing it was now after nine, and he had managed to get a decent few hours sleep, he decided to head down to the kitchen and see who was up. Sam was usually an early bird and most times already had breakfast ready by the time Dean decided to roll down stairs. 

     When he got there Sam was in the kitchen, showered, dressed, and stirring a pot of spaghetti sauce he was making for dinner. And just as Dean had expected, there was a fresh pot of coffee made and a plate of bacon, eggs, and toast waiting for him on the counter. 

     He walked over and sat down on one of the stools at the island, watching Sam as he ate, "Where's Mom?"

     "Around somewhere," he answered, as he turned and placed a cup of coffee in front of Dean, "she was up before I was today."

     He nodded and focused on finishing his food, then thanked Sam before heading through the house to go find their mom. He walked down the hall and heard the slam of the dryer door in the laundry room, so he took a hard right and found her inside. Though his smile instantly dropped when he saw her, his entire body froze, and every limb hummed with anxiety while all he could do was stare at his mom, holding two things in her hands staring at them in confusion.

     The first was the tickets Dean had been given by the directors of the ballet, the ones that were meant for her and Sam. The second… was Dean's tights. 

     "Mom…" He finally managed to breathe out, and she turned to look at him. 

     "Dean, what… what is this? Are they yours?"

     "Why do you have those? Why were you in my bag?"

     "You were sleeping, and I saw your bag on the washing machine," she tried to speak calmly, not wanting Dean to freak out, seeing he was clearly on the brink of a meltdown, "I figured since you seemed so tired lately I would do your laundry for you. But what is this? Are you… are you in this show?"

     He was pretty much in tears now, he was so scared. He wanted to do this differently, he wanted to tell them on his own terms, when he felt ready, not have his mom find out on her own because he forgot he left his bag on the washing machine. "I forgot I left my bag here. I… I…"

     Mary just calmly reached out and took Dean by the shoulders, gently guiding him to the kitchen and sitting him at the table. She sat across from him, staring helplessly at him as he just placed his head on his hands, fingers wringing tightly in his hair, knuckles white.

     "Woah," Sam dropped the wooden spoon on the counter with a clatter and practically ran around the counter to sit beside Dean at the table, "what's going on?!"

     "Dean, talk to us, Honey," Mary tried to get him to look up but he wouldn't budge, "Were those tights yours?"

     "Tights?!" Sam looked between them. 

     "I… I couldn't tell you." He shook his head, hands still over his eyes, "I was afraid."

     "Tell us what, Dean,?" Sam tried this time, placing a hand on Dean's shaking shoulder. 

     "Why not, Honey?"

     "Dad…" He finally lifted his head slightly out of his hands, wiping the tears that had smudged all over his face now, though still not making eye contact with anyone. "Dad would never want me to be the person I am, he would be disappointed."

     "Disappointed about what, Dean?!" Sam moved to get into Dean's eye line but he quickly darted his eyes away. "You're a great person, why would anyone be disappointed in you? What could you have done that's so wrong?"

     Dean just shook his head and closed his eyes, the sobs coming back a little harder now. Mary reached over the table and managed to get ahold of one of his to squeeze it comfortingly. "Tell Sam, it's okay."

     "I…" He tried to look at Sam but he couldn't. He was afraid that just because his dad was gone and he couldn't see the look of disappointment on his face, he still might see it on Sam's. But he forced it out anyways, since there was no going back now, "I… dance."

     "Okay," Sam shrugged his bottom lip and shook his head, seemingly unfazed, "I still don't understand why you're crying though. Lots of people dance, many of them are amazingly talented, so why are you so upset?"

     "But I'm a ballet dancer, Sam! Not some crazy cool hip hop dancer that you're probably thinking of, no, I dance around the stage in girly tights!" He slammed a fist down on the table, making Sam jump a little. "And the tickets Mom found in my bag, along with my tights, were for the performance I am going to be in. I am part of the Kansas State Ballet's rendition of The Nutcracker."

     "You… you dance ballet?" Sam smiled a bit at the thought, "Dean Winchester, the manliest man of all men to ever man, dances ballet?"

     "This is exactly why I didn't say anything," Dean just shook his head and wiped away more stray tears, "Dad would have killed me if he ever found out that I loved ballet, let alone taught myself the skill. He wanted me to be the manly man that everyone knows and thinks I am, not some pansy dancing around the stage in tights."

     "But, Dean, that's awesome!" Dean turned to Sam, a little startled. "Ballet’s actually one of the most intense dance forms out there! It's so powerful, and moving. And the fact that you taught yourself the art, and are a part of a state ballet group, is something that a lot of classically trained dancers could never even come close to be able to do!"

     "But… Dad-"

     “Your father is gone now, Honey, has been for four years," she gave his hand a squeeze again, and this time she managed to catch his eye, "you have to stop looking over your shoulder and expecting him to be there. It's only holding you back. He would have been proud of you no matter what, he loved you."

     "Would he still be proud if he knew I wore tights and danced in pointe shoes?"

     Mary shrugged, "He might have been a little sad that you didn't want to follow in his footsteps and fall into sports, but he would have supported you regardless. I know he seemed like a hardened man, but he loved you boys. And now it's time for you to just let go of that past and be yourself, Dean.” 

     Dean shook his head vigorously, gasping out, "I can't,"

     “You can.” She assured him in her most firm mom voice she could muster.

     "You don't understand!" Dean nearly screamed, "It is hardwired into my brain that I shouldn't be this way! I should be covered in dirt sliding across a baseball diamond, or sweating through my gear on the ice, not dancing in skin tight outfits and sparkles. He would hate me, he would hate everything I am!"

     "No he wouldn't," she said softly and shook her head, "but that doesn't matter anymore, Dean, this is your time to be you, and I wish you would have told me sooner rather than suppressing this obvious passion. I want you to be happy, Dean, and if ballet is it for you then that is perfectly fine! Just be you, please, Honey.” 

     He didn't say anymore after that. Just sat at the table for most of the day, contemplating everything that his mom and brother had said, and what he was going to do about it. 

~~~~~~~~~~~

     It was their last rehearsal before they would open to the public. Opening night was right around the corner. Everyone was a cluster of excitement and nerves, buzzing around the theater, the knowledge that their tickets had sold out seconds after being released was making the atmosphere even more intense. The entire cast was reeling, well, everyone except Dean. He still hadn't shown up at the theater yet, he was almost an hour late for the rehearsal, and Cas was starting to get worried. Along with others. 

     "Have you heard from him, Castiel?" Cas just shook his head at a worried Chuck from center stage, "Has anyone heard from Dean?!"

     He ran through the theater, asking everyone about Dean as the rest of the cast waited patiently on stage. Cas just stood there alone, worried, waiting along with everyone else, his body tingling with fear that maybe Dean wasn't coming back. Maybe this was it, maybe he had decided he didn't want this anymore, or his family didn't want it. 

     He listened to the hushed conversations around him, trying to focus on that for a moment, but that didn't help. For the very first thing he heard was one of the female dancers saying to another, “I overheard him saying yesterday that he was going home to tell his family about the show, he was worried it wouldn’t go over well. I hope everything’s okay.”

     And if Castiel's heart wasn't already in his feet. But then suddenly pounding footsteps came from Castiel's right and he turned to see Dean bouncing across the stage to stand next to him. "I'm here, sorry I'm so late!"

     Both Chuck and Metatron breathed hard sighs of relief and said, “Oh thank heavens!”

     "I just had some things to clear up back home, I'm really sorry!" The directors both waved him off, just thankful their other star was still here. Then he turned his attention to Cas at his side and smiled, a little twinkle in his eye as he said only to him, "I'm ready for this, I'm ready to just be me."

     "Shall we get this final rehearsal on the road then?!" Metarton waved his hands in the air and everyone started running around them. "Places people, places!"

     Cas walked over with a matching smile to Dean’s and took both his hands in his own. He didn't say anything, he didn't need to, neither of them did. So instead he just lifted Dean's hands to his mouth, placed a gentle kiss on the knuckles of each hand, and then moved back to get in his place. The whole time the two of them never took their eyes off one another, even as the orchestra started playing their final dance.

~~~~~~~~~~~

     It was finally opening night and Dean had never been so god damn nervous in his entire life. He was currently standing backstage in full costume, peeking out the curtain at the completely full seats, people packing into the theater, and his heart was pounding out of his chest. Then he looked to the front row and saw his mom and Sam, sitting in the seats given to them by the directors, and then both Chuck and Metatron waltzed through the orchestra to introduce themselves to them. That made his nerves even worse, he was sure his heart was going to pop out of his chest and explode, and he had the sudden urge to whip off his pointe shoes and get the hell outta dodge. But then there were hands on his shoulders, rubbing up and down his arms, steadying and grounding. "Cas," he breathed and leaned back.

     "You're nervous," he whispered into Dean's ear as he leaned impossibly closer to Cas. 

     He nodded, "Sammy's here, and my mom, talking to Chuck and Metatron," he let out a long shuddering sigh, "what if they hate it? What if I mess up because they're watching?! What if everyone laughs at me?! Cas!"

     He turned Dean towards him and pulled him into a tight hug, Dean wrapping his arms around his neck and digging his face in, "You're spiraling, Dean," he rubbed his hands soothingly up and down his back, "you have nothing to worry about. I promise that not just your family, but everyone in the audience will love your performance. You will not fall, because I will always catch you. And no one will laugh at you, because if they do they will have to answer to me."

     Dean chuckled against Cas's neck as Cas continued, "You will be fine. You know the dances inside and out, you know every single move, every line." Cas kept going as he felt Dean relaxing, and started moving his hands up Dean's sides to his arms, then his hands, twisting him around and resting his head on his shoulder, wrapping their clasped hands around Dean and holding him tightly to his chest. "And you know me, and I know you. When we dance together our bodies are one and it is just you and I on the stage together, just us. That's all you need to remember, and if you feel like you are starting to slip, just reach out your hand and I will be there, I promise."

     Dean just nodded and inhaled deeply, trying to calm himself, and it definitely helped when Cas gently pressed his lips to Dean's neck. Not so much a kiss but it was oh so comforting. 

     They stayed like that for a while, as long as they could, Cas's lips still pressed to Dean's neck and rocking them softly back and forth. Until the lights started to flicker, the signal for everyone to take their seats and for the cast and crew to take their positions. 

     Cas gave Dean one last hug before pulling back and taking Dean's hands in his, lifting them to his mouth to do his new favourite thing, and placed a kiss on the knuckles of each hand. Then moved across the stage to stand on the other side facing Dean. 

     His nerves came back a bit now that Cas was gone, he could still see him but not having his hands on him was unsettling him again, and even more so when he heard Chuck and Metatron on the other side of the curtain, addressing the audience before the show would start. 

     "Welcome everyone to the Kansas State Ballet's rendition of The Nutcracker!" Metatron announced and claps and cheers filled the air. 

     "Though," Chuck stepped in, "we got off to a pretty rocky start, didn't we."

     Metatron chuckled, "That we did, but maybe for the better!"

     "Very true," Chuck nodded, then turned to the audience, "early on in rehearsals we had a small bump, that being that our original lead of Clara had to… unexpectedly leave us. But, in place of her, we were gifted an angel, your very own, champion of dance, hometown boy, Dean Winchester!"

     From backstage Dean could hear everyone cheering, clapping louder than before, and the undeniable Sam Winchester whistle and hollar combo, which he had to admit eased his nerves just a bit. And Chuck and Metatron went on. 

      "Well, look at us, gushing over our stars," Metatron laughed, "we should just let you see for yourselves the pure, raw chemistry and talent that we have discovered here. Allow us to let Dean Winchester and Castiel Novak steal your hearts as they have ours."

     "So, without further ado," Chuck said just before they backed away to duck backstage, "we give you, The Nutcracker!"

     They both backed away, tucked themselves backstage to watch their masterpiece unfold, as the curtain opened and the lights shone hot and bright on the stage. 

     Dean took a deep breath, the worst part of this ballet was that he had to do the first act without Cas, before the Nutcracker Prince came in to play. But he looked over at Cas, still standing directly across from him, and he gave him a reassuring smile and gestured to himself and Dean. Just you and I together, Dean thought, I'm dancing for Cas. And with a smile and a new found burst of energy he bounded across the stage to give the best performance he could.

~~~~~~~~~~~

     As the show went on and Dean was finally able to get to dance with Cas, his very own Nutcracker Prince, that chemistry that Chuck and Metatron had spoken of came in full force. 

     Sam watched in complete awe from the front row as his brother moved on stage before him. He had never seen Dean so happy, so powerful, so amazing! And the way he danced with the other lead, it was such an intense form of intimacy, of pure completeness, that Sam was sure the entire audience could feel it. The atmosphere around him was on fire, and everyone in the audience was on the edge of their seats through the entire performance. 

     The ballet had everything, Sam thought as his eyes opened impossibly wider with each passing act. Crazy fights, ups, downs, emotions, romance, devastation, and love. And all too soon for him, and everyone else watching, it was too quickly coming to an end. 

     He watched as the Nutcracker Prince and Charles came together for their final dance, and he had to admit that he was slightly jealous at the way Dean and the Nutcracker were looking at each other. But he was oh so happy for his brother, he was finally truly happy. 

     Sparks were clearly flying between them, and as the orchestra played the final notes of the song, Charles and his Nutcracker Prince held their ending poses and the entire audience rose to their feet. Not a single person wasn't standing, not a single eye was dry, and that included both Chuck and Metatron who walked slightly out on the stage, both cheering as loud as everyone else was. 

     And just before the other dancers joined them on stage for a bow, Cas couldn't resist doing what he had been wanting to do for so long. Both of them panting, gazing deeply at each other, Dean's pure blissful smile that he knew was only there for him, and Cas knew what would make the perfect ending to this night. So he pulled lightly on Dean's hand in his and he bounced forwards into Castiel's arms. And right there, in front of everyone in the audience, Cas dipped Dean backwards and finally, finally kissed Dean. 

     The audience erupted impossibly louder, but Dean and Cas didn't even hear it. It was just the two of them. Dean clutched tighter to Cas as he dipped him a little further back, and Dean ran his hands up to clutch Cas's face as the cast around them bowed, and the curtain closed in front of them. 

~~~~~~~~~~~

     Castiel's lips were on his for what felt like a blissful eternity, lips and tongue moving with Dean's as if they were built perfectly for each other. And Dean never wanted it to end, but eventually it had to. 

     One of their celebrating cast members bumped into them as they bounced by, excited over a perfect performance, and Cas gave Dean one last long kiss before they pulled apart and Cas stood them back up. 

     Dean was even more breathless now then he had been after the dance had ended. Kissing Cas was something he had wanted to do since the very first moment he saw him dancing in that studio, and all he could do was smile and even blush a little as he pulled Cas's forehead to rest on his, "It's about time."

     Cas chuckled, his chest vibrating against Dean's as he did, and pulled Dean in even closer, "Wanted to do that for a very long time now."

     "Me too, Cas."

     They stood together for a moment before Cas said, "You were amazing, Dean."

     "So were you," he nuzzled his nose against Cas's, leaning in a little closer for another kiss, "I wouldn't have been able to do all of this if it wasn't for you."

     Before they could kiss again, a screech was heard from off to the side, startling them both as well as silencing the entire cast and crew still backstage. Cas clutched a little tighter to Dean, but Dean just laughed and hid his face in Cas's shoulder before he turned slightly, still holding Cas.

     "Mom," he laughed as she came running through the parting crowd towards them, nearly crashing into them, "stop freaking out, it's embarrassing."

     She pulled him away from Cas and into the tightest bear hug he had ever been in, "You were amazing, Honey, so absolutely amazing!"

     "Mom's right, Dean," Sam came up behind them, taking his turn to hug Dean, "that was the best performance I have ever seen! It had everything! I was literally on the edge of my seat the entire time!"

     "Thanks, Sammy! And I’m glad you're here cuz there’s someone I want you to meet," Dean said as he backed up, rubbing the back of his neck. Then he turned back and took Castiel's hand, bringing him forwards a bit, "this is Cas, the other lead and… and…"

     Dean stuttered, not exactly sure what to say, especially while his mom and brother were staring at him so intensely. Not to mention the all too knowing matching Winchester smirks they were sending his way. So Cas stepped forward, hand outstretched towards them, "I'm Dean's boyfriend."

     Boyfriend, Dean thought, and his stomach had butterflies again, though this time the good kind. And he couldn't help but laugh as his boyfriend's hand was swatted away by Sam, and he was taken in a Winchester group hug, while Sam patted his back and said, "Welcome to the family, man!" Then backed away and held out two bouquets of flowers to the both of them, "And these are for you guys, congrats on an amazing first performance, and many more to come!"

     "Thanks, Sammy," Dean said as he took it, then settled himself against Cas's side again, "it means a lot that you guys liked the show."

     "We really did, Honey, and we’re so proud of you, both of you." She stood between them for one more hug and a kiss on each boy's cheek before backing away and saying, "alright, you two change and then I'm taking you both to dinner, on me. Sammy and I will wait for you by the car."

     Dean watched them go with a smile as Cas pulled him a little closer so he could kiss his cheek. "Your family is great, I am glad to be a part of it."

     "They're a little crazy but I love them," he said and turned a bit, smiling at Cas, "almost as much as I love you."

     "And I love you, Dean," he said as he leaned in, pressing his lips to Dean's in an almost kiss, "I am so very glad that you snuck into that dance studio and watched me dancing like a creeper."

     Dean couldn't help but laugh against Cas's lips and said, "Me too, Cas, me too," and closed the gap between them. Dean was pleased that everything had turned out better than he had ever thought it would, and that the ballet had been a winning performance, but of all of that the only thing that he really cared about was that the man in his arms, currently kissing him absolutely senseless, was finally all his. His very own Nutcracker Prince.

The end. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: So that’s the end friends! My one shot turned three chapter fic lol 

I hope you guys enjoyed it, and as always I have plenty more fics on the horizon, so look forward to those! Love you guys! <3

I also wanted to send a huge shout out to my lovely friend @thebridgekid for always putting up with me, reading all my crazy ideas, and just being super awesome <3<3<3

@dean-humanity-winchester

[cdaae]

TW Death stuff

It happened very quickly. A week ago on Friday, he was still himself. But there was an incident that night, he couldn’t get back into bed after using the bedside commode and we had to call hospice who sent three men to lift him into bed. No more getting out of bed after that. And it’s wild that it’s only been a week. He slept a lot saturday and sunday but then he was awake and responsive on monday. Wednesday my siblings came and he was a little out of it but still about to talk. He said to them, “I know I’m not long for this world. I’ll miss, I love you, and I don’t know why people keep waking me up.” My mom and stepdad came to see him Wednesday night and he sat up, talked a bit but mostly listened.  Thursday, my aunt arrived. He had woken up Thursday morning but not in time to see her. He told my grandma he was ready to go but he didn’t want to leave her and she reassured him that it was ok to go. Thursday evening around 10:30pm we were trying to shift him a bit, and he woke but he wasn’t all there. He could barely communicate and moved the blanket and shifted his legs like he wanted to get out of bed. He didn’t really wake up again after that. He reacted a few times when given meds or moved, but barely and we couldn’t always tell if he was reacting to us or maybe a dream. The nurse came quickly to see him yesterday when his oxygen got really low. We thought he was going to go then and my grandma and my aunt and I gathered around him and I cried when she stroked his hair and told him it was ok and he was gonna go see my dad and my great grandma. The nurse told us to start giving him morphine every two hours, even though the night. I took the first shift, leaving once while streaming to my phantom server, and then I gave him meds again at 2am. Then I went to bed. My aunt woke me up at 5am, right after it happened, to tell me he had passed. I went out to see him and we called hospice, they got a person out about an hour later and then called people to come take him away. I’m at home, alone, waiting for people to come take his hospital bed and other equipment. My great aunt and uncle drove here across the country as fast as they could, California to Alabama in two days, but they arrived this morning after he had passed. They’re with my grandma and my aunt at the funeral home now making arrangements.

It all just happened so quickly, a week and he was gone and it doesn;t feel right or real and it hurts so much to think about having to clean out his office or the tools from his garage and the phone tracker he insisted my grandma and I have says the last day he left the house was April 17th and there’s a bag of apples in the fridge because he asked me to make an apple pie like his mom used to make but I didn’t make it in time before he wasn’t able to eat anymore and I feel so bad that one of the last things he asked for was a pie and I was busy with school and helping my grandma and I forgot and then suddenly his condition was so different and it was too late. They turned off his oxygen and after living with those machines for over two years, the house feels way too quiet. Much like when my dad died, there’s bouts of crying and then there’s bouts of being ok for the moment, trying to call family and handle arrangements. It just feels too quiet and so unreal that he’s gone. He was diagnosed in like 2015 and he held on for so long, so much longer than they thought he would and I truly thought we had time yet. It took him so long to get to the point of needing a hospital bed. But when he admitted himself to hospice, he was tired of fighting. He was ready. And I’m glad he had time to get ready even though I’m not at all ready for him to be gone

[dayseternal-blog]

Summary: Naruto and Hinata join the Twelve Guardian Ninja of the Land of Fire’s Daimyo.  (But not really.)  Their mission is to smoke out the rat among them who’s selling political secrets to insurgents, while making sure the other Guardians don’t figure them out.

Neither can tell when their acting became so convincing.

A fake relationship canon-divergent AU.  Rated E for eventual shameless smut.

Written for NH2020 March - Bodyguard Theme

Read Chapter 1 and Chapter 2

Chapter 3: Kiss Him Again

They left for Kumogakure ten days in advance for the joint Chunin Exams.

Ten days of constant vigilance, watching for bandits or other criminals intent on attacking the daimyo’s entourage.

Once they all entered the foggy village high among the mountaintops, they could relax a little.

The Raikage has his shinobi posted in high-traffic areas, at the fanciest hotels where the daimyo are staying, and surrounding the meeting halls.

But for Naruto and Hinata, they both know they can’t let their guards down now.

Visitors from many different nations crowd the streets.  Opportunities for a possible traitor to sneak away are high now that they are taking on 2-person shifts throughout their stay in Kumo.

At the top of their suspect list: Taiyou, a genjutsu-user who came from the same poverty-stricken village as one of the caught informants.  Lightning-style user Tacchi, who never told anyone that his younger sister was currently a missing person.  And Ryuu, an earth and water-style user who apparently caught the informants first.

They also chose Eizan, though his story held true.  His parents were killed in the Third Shinobi War.  He was then adopted outside of Konoha by old farmers, who have already passed.  Naruto and Hinata discussed that Eizan, the unofficial leader among the Guardians, would be good at keeping the group together, making it more obvious if someone wants to do something else.

Naruto knows he’ll need to sleep with one eye open in case someone tries to leave in the middle of the night.

Except he finds himself knocking on the door of Hinata’s room, his own belongings in hand, trying to ignore the flip-flopping in his gut.

“Oh, Naruto, you’re not gonna keep your stuff with Hinata-chan?"  "You guys got in a fight or something?”

...He had to awkwardly blame it on habit, grin really widely, and scooch himself out of the room.

This isn’t weird at all, he assures himself.  He’s slept beside Hinata on missions before.  With her teammates.  Outside.  Many times.

She answers the door.  “Naruto-kun?”

“Uh, I kinda need to stay with you.”

She blinks once, realization hurtling into her.  “O-oh, yes, come in.”

He enters her room silently and puts his stuff down.

They both stand there, eyes darting to the only bed in the room.

He panics for only half a second.  He has the overnight shift, so he won’t be here anyway.  “We can take turns?” he wonders aloud.  “So while I’m on duty, you can sleep on the bed if you want.”

She nods a little too hard.  “And while I’m on duty, you can sleep on the bed.”

They’re nodding to each other, glad that they easily came to a solution.

She inwardly takes a deep breath, trying to stay as calm as possible, trying to get some sense of how she normally is.  “Naruto-kun, please go ahead and use the shower,” she invites.

He glances at the bathroom, where the light is already on.  She was in the middle of getting ready before he interrupted her.  “No, no, I’ll go after.”

“Are you sure?” she asks, knowing it’s customary for the men to go first.

“Yeah, I’m fine for now.”

She decides not to push it.  “Thank you,” she says, probably a little bit too quietly.  She grabs her whole bag and retreats to the bathroom as quickly as she can.

She stares at herself in the mirror.  For some reason, she didn’t foresee any of this happening.  But she needs to act like it’s not a problem.  Otherwise, Naruto will feel like he’s troubling her when he’s not.  She needs to act as unbothered as possible.

She can do this.

She can act as she normally does.

So she makes sure to wash up as best she can, without going too fast or too slow.  Too fast, and he’ll think he’s bothering her.  Too slow, and he’ll wonder what’s taking so long.

She just has to act normal.

She quickly moisturizes, dresses, spreads a towel over her shoulders, and grabs the hairdryer to finish outside.  “Naruto-kun?” she calls, opening the bathroom door.  “I’m sorry to make you wait.”

“Oh, no.”  He looks up at her from his seated position where he was tracking the movements of the other Guardians.

He tries to keep himself from staring.

He’s known for a long time now that Hinata turns pink easily due to her fair complexion, but he still wasn’t prepared for how shiny and rosy she would look.  He stands to gather his things, averting his eyes, feeling like he saw something he’s not supposed to know.  “I was just watching the others.  It seems like they’re all just relaxing like us.  I don’t think we have to worry about anything right now since we all just got here.”

“Okay, thank you.”

“I’ll go in now, then?”

“Mhm.  I’m done.”

“Thanks.”

He steps in to the bathroom, taking notice of Hinata’s used towelette, a small tub of cream, and the hotel’s soaps.  He idly remembers that she gave him some stuff like that at his own Chunin Exams.

Hinata’s been a good friend to him for a long time.  Really since the Chunin Exams, she’s been a good friend.  Maybe that’s why he chose 8 years?  Maybe his subconscious just summed up the important years of their friendship.

He washes up, glad to be finally free of the grime of travel, thankful that he wasn’t on the first shift to watch the daimyo.

When he leaves the bathroom, patting off the humidity with a towel, the room’s noisy.

And her long hair is billowing out behind her.

A tool that he recognizes must be a hairdryer is in her right hand.  Her other hand glides through her dark strands like they’re nothing more than water.

He puts his old clothes away, watching mesmerized.

Hinata realizes he’s staring.  She shuts the machine off.  “I’m sorry, it’s really loud.”

“Uh, no.”  He notices that the top of her head is dry but the ends aren't.  “It’s not bothering me at all!”

“Oh, then, I only have a little more to do.  I’ll be done soon,” she says apologetically.

“Take your time!” he assures.  “Really!”

“Okay, thank you, it won’t take long.”  She turns back around, clicking the hairdryer on.

He guesses she must do this every time after she takes a bath.  He’s never used a hairdryer in his life, never seen anyone use one for that matter.

But it’s something that she does.  For her long hair.

...It seems unnecessary.  Plain air can do the same thing.

But...it’s apparently something she likes to do.

Maybe all girls do it to be pretty like this.

He gets the feeling again that he’s seeing something he’s not supposed to know, but Hinata doesn’t really seem bothered by his presence.

She glances over at him and sees that he’s sitting on the bed now, still watching her.  Not knowing what to think, nerves starting to rise, she decides to stop and let the air do the rest.  “I checked the other room just a moment ago.  Taiyou-san and Eizan-san are still there.”

He completely forgot about that for a second.  Good thing Hinata’s a reliable mission partner.  “Thanks.  I think when we all go out to get dinner, that’s when we’ll have to be more observant.”

She nods.  Their mission is only just getting started.

They head out with Taiyou and Eizan to a nearby bar.  It’s not the kind of environment Hinata is used to at all, since she’s still underage in the Land of Fire.

But here in the Land of Lightning, she isn’t.

“Hinata-chan, you’re 19 right?” Eizan calls, sliding the drink menu across the table to her.  “How about ordering a drink since you can.”

“Umm…”  She will still have to be alert for tonight.  “Maybe not this time.  This is a work trip after all.”

“You Konoha shinobi are so uptight,” Taiyou observes aloud, looking at both her and Naruto, who hasn’t touched the drink menu either.

“Yeah,” Eizan agrees.  “You guys don’t know since it’s your first work trip, but these are the most lax jobs for us.  We just have to be on our game during the transitions and traveling.  Especially in a village like Kumogakure, the shinobi here are good.  They’re tough.  We don’t have to worry.”

Taiyou nods in agreement.  “Kumo is one of our favorites to travel to these days, even though in the past they did all kinds of shady things against Konoha.”

“Ahh, ah, that was you, wasn’t it!!” Eizan says, eyes wide in realization, staring at Hinata.

She doesn’t give any reaction because it wasn’t a question.

Naruto looks between them, not knowing what Eizan's accusing her of.

Eizan looks at Naruto, pointing a finger at him.  “And...your mom, the previous jinchuuriki, got almost kidnapped, too.”

Naruto’s mind races to catch up.  “I knew that my mom….”  He looks back at Hinata, trying to connect the threads.  “You got kidnapped?”

“I was really young,” she offers in affirmation.  It’s an event she’d rather not talk about.  Or, more like, she just can’t talk about it.

“You didn’t know?” Taiyou asks him.

And he’s speechless.  No, he didn’t know.

“I-it’s okay, Naruto-kun, I don’t really like to talk about it.  It happened a long time ago.”

Taiyou and Eizan look down at the food menus.

“Eight years together.”  And he didn’t know until now?  Hell, even if they weren’t in a relationship (which they aren’t), but even so, just as friends, why didn’t he know?

He considers her as one of his most important friends.  She knows so much about his past...and he can’t say the same for her…  He looks at Hinata, trying to form appropriate words, trying to push past his clamoring feelings of inadequacy.  

“Excuse me, waiter!” Eizan calls loudly.  His voice dominates the table as he orders drinks and food for everyone.  “The drinks are on me,” he assures with a wink.  “The two of you have some talking to do later on, and maybe some alcohol can loosen you guys up!”

Hinata and Naruto are pulled back to the present.  To their secret mission.  But their senpai in the group just bought drinks for them, and social code obligates them to at least humor him a little.

“Don’t worry about the guard duties for now,” Taiyou says.

Naruto looks at Hinata.

“I think I’ll be fine with just a little,” she murmurs to him.

“Relax!  Enjoy this trip!” Eizan says meaningfully.  “And with the international peace, the chances of something happening to our daimyo is very low.  Both of you are always so uptight.  It’s okay to prioritize your relationship once in a while.”

Naruto’s never been described as “uptight” in his life.  Now, Taiyou and Eizan both described him that way.  He doesn’t know what to make of it.  He guesses he hasn’t been as silly as he usually is, being on an undercover mission and, most of all, being that his partner is Hinata, he just needs to be better than he usually acts...  He ducks down to Hinata, whispering, “Yeah, it’s okay.  I’m on duty later tonight, so you don’t have to worry…” and you can sleep if you need to.  He can just keep watch over the other Guardians at the same time.  He hopes his thoughts somehow translated to her.

She nods, giving him a little smile as thanks.  She turns back.  “Thank you, Eizan-san.  We’ll talk about it later.”

He grins at them.  “Just trying to help.  You two make a cute couple.”

She ducks her face, hiding her silly blush.  She squeezes her eyes shut, willing herself to calm down, telling herself that this is all for the mission.

She peeks up at Naruto, who’s shyly watching her.

Meeting her eyes, he grins despite the pinching in his gut.  “We work well together.  Yeah, Hinata?”

She nods, caught up in his gentle warmth, wondering if he’s ever thought of them as being anything more than friends.  Even if he hasn’t, she hopes that when she finally confesses, he’ll consider her seriously.  Until that day, she’ll enjoy the effortless trust between them.  She thinks, she hopes, that even if he rejects her, they won’t lose the friendship they have.

Eizan has the next shift with him, but Naruto notes that both Taiyou and Eizan aren’t exactly holding back.  Getting drunk doesn’t rule them out from being traitors, but it does tell him they aren’t going to be able to act especially sneaky for the next couple of hours.

He keeps an eye on Hinata, too, who despite how careful she’s been in her own consumption, her usually fair cheeks have ruddied and a permanent little smile is stuck on her face.  She’s still quiet compared to anyone else, but if anything, she seems more cheerful.  And the other change is...she’s been looking up at him a lot.

So he’s compelled to look back down at her each time, to meet her happy gaze with a bemused one of his own, left wondering what she’s thinking about, or if she’s thinking about anything at all.  He can feel the alcohol, too, fizzing under his skin, thumping in his chest, but concern for the mission and a rising sense of responsibility for her keep him somewhat tethered.  “You okay?” he murmurs.

“Mhm.”  She looks into his eyes, marveling at seeing her own reflection there.  

“She’s feeling it!” observes Taiyou with a laugh.  “Is this your first time drinking, Hinata-chan?”

She shakes her head, still smiling.  “I’ve had sake on special occasions before with my family, but not out like this.”

“Ahh,” Eizan voices, looking thoughtful.  “Today’s a special occasion, too, then!  First time drinking legally!”

“Mhm,” Hinata agrees easily.

“It’s good that you’re a smiler,” Taiyou laughs.  “I have a friend back home, whenever she drinks, she starts crying.  We try not to let her drink at all.”

“That’s like our friend!” Naruto adds.  “Except whenever he drinks, even just the tiniest sip, he picks a fight with anyone.  What’s worse is he’s literally impossible to beat.  You can’t let him get anywhere near alcohol, otherwise he’ll bust the whole place down, no joke.”

She knows Rock Lee is infamous for his drunk behavior, but what she will always think about first is his constant encouragement to anyone, including even Neji when he was at his most unfriendly.  She’s thankful Neji had a teammate like Lee.  “Well, when he’s sober, he’s the best kind of guy you could ever meet.”

For a split-second, he thinks to agree, but, “Wait, I’m not the best guy you’ve ever met?”

Eizan and Taiyou burst out in raucous laughter.

His stupidly thoughtless question rings in his ears.  He wants so badly to take it back when he sees Hinata turn to him, her eyes as wide as pearlescent saucers, her mouth fallen open.

“Oh Naruto-kun, you are!” she assures, emotion welling up in panic.

“Uh, no, I know I’m not-”

“No!  You are the best guy I’ve ever met!  Really!” she presses, trying to get him to meet her gaze.

“I really didn’t mean it-”

“Naruto-kun,” she begs in a whisper.  She can’t fathom how she could let him doubt himself for even a moment.  Her hand rises on its own volition, cupping his cheek, trying to encourage him to face her.

But he feels sickeningly embarrassed.  His eyes meet hers for a beat only to dart away.  “H-hinata,” he stutters.  “It’s okay, I was just kidding-”

“He’s so hurt!” Taiyou howls in laughter.

“Better kiss him to make him feel better!!” Eizan teases, hand slapping his own face in his mirth.

Naruto looks mortified with himself, an uncertain expression she’s never seen on him before.

Doesn’t he know how special he is to her, far, far beyond anyone else?...  She realizes, in horror, that he really doesn’t.  And she can’t think of any solution that would better convey her sincerity.  She grips his arm, pulling herself up slightly, tilting his head toward her, the burn over his birthmarks meeting her lips.

She closes her eyes, letting herself linger.

Naruto feels like all the air got sucked out of the room.  Pure shock has him turning his face, only to see her shift down, only to feel her soft lips again, lightly caress, then gently press right above his jawline, warm and so close to the corner of his mouth.

She settles back, trying to gauge whether it worked or not.

He stares at her, at her lips that were just on him, lungs suddenly malfunctioning in uneven, struggling breaths.

She thinks it’s good that at least now he’s looking at her.

She blinks once.

Twice.

I just kissed him.  On his face I just kissed him on his cheek, on his cheek twice on his face-

I kissed him.

Realization has her speechless; she stares back at him with an increasingly gaping expression.  She opens her mouth to apologize when Taiyou’s and Eizan’s cheers about how cute they are barge into her panicked mind, and she realizes like another clap of thunder over the rapidly brewing storm in her soul that she can’t apologize with them watching, she has to somehow act like she meant it all to happen because as his “girlfriend,” she was initially just trying to-

“N-naruto...kun?” she tests in a whisper, unsure of what worse could possibly happen to her now.  “Y-you’re the...best guy-”  Her voice is so small she can barely tell the difference between her words and her breath, and she doesn’t think she can possibly go on…

But his piercingly blue eyes are fixed on her like he’s not registering anything else in the bar.

And her heart stutters harder than her childhood speech disorder, yet she manages, “-I’ve ever met…”  She wants to curl up into herself and die.

“DAMN IT!”  Taiyou pounds the table, making both of them jump out of their skins.  He stands and points at them.  “You fucking cute couple!  I’m going to get laid.”  He hurriedly throws money down on the table as Eizan bemoans the fact that he has to work tonight, and starts to head out of the restaurant.

“Yeah,” Eizan drawls.  “We better get going.”  He starts taking out his money as he calls for the waiter.

Hinata watches Taiyou disappear from sight, and anxiety grips her.

She looks to Naruto, the alarm in her expression hopefully enough to pull him out of his shock, though she really can’t blame how out-of-sorts he is after what she just did.

When he doesn’t seem to register the current circumstances, her mind races for any excuse that would let her follow the Guardian who escaped their sight.  “...Eizan-san, please go ahead.  I think we’re not ready to leave.”

“Hm?  Oh, right, right, you guys need to talk about stuff.”  He drops some money on the table.  “Oi, Naruto-”

He manages to turn his attention to Eizan.

“Don’t be late, got it?”

Naruto nods out of habit.

Eizan starts heading out of the restaurant.

Byakugan.  She activates her kekkei genkai, frantically sorting through the crowds, finally zeroing in on Taiyou meandering down the street.

Naruto blinks himself into awareness, realizing that they have no idea where the suspects of their mission went.  “Hinata,” he calls, half of him seriously worried about the situation, the other half tipping back toward delirium.

“I have a lock on Taiyou-san,” she starts.  “I’ll follow him.  Naruto-kun, please follow Eizan-san.”

“Yeah,” he responds, unable to control how stupidly breathless he sounds.

She knows he’s probably waiting for some kind of apology or explanation, but the longer they linger in the bar, the farther the others get.  And, honestly, she knows that she can’t possibly handle a rejection from him right now.

Her heart’s not prepared at all.

She fumbles out enough money for their share of food, and they scooch out of the booth.

They part ways at the door, tracking their targets in opposite directions.

He follows Eizan back to the hotel, where he heads straight to his room.

So Naruto heads back to his own room, settling on watching Eizan, Taiyou, and Hinata from afar, trying to calm an adrenaline rush unlike anything he’s ever had before.

Like he’s constantly trying to breathe around the sweetest words he’s ever heard.

Like he’s repeatedly swallowing down a swollen pressure gripping his heart.

His body yearns for a gentle weight against him.

His cheek tickles with an otherworldly touch, one that’s soft, hot, intended for him.

He keeps falling out of Sage Mode, again and again.

It’s only when he realizes Taiyou is in close proximity to someone with a very weak chakra signature does he really try to force himself to pay attention.

Hinata is unmoving in his mind’s eye.  She’s obviously observing the two.

Imagining her breaks up his concentration.

He can’t be like this.

He can’t work like this.

And he needs to get to his shift.

He pushes himself into motion, trying to focus just on Taiyou.  This could be an exchange of information for all that he knows, and he needs to be ready to help at any moment should Hinata need him.

While he’s on his shift, standing guard near the daimyo’s room with Eizan, he notices Taiyou’s chakra fluctuating a bit, like a streetlight about to go out.

Hinata remains in her same spot as before.  She hasn’t moved at all.

Taiyou’s chakra suddenly surges wildly like a detonated flash bomb, then just as suddenly, quiets down to normal.

Hinata remains completely still, but she's fine.

His brows furrow, trying to make sense of it.

“What’s up,” Eizan asks, his guard raised.

He doesn’t know if he should tell him.  “Nothing, there’s no threat.”

Eizan lowers his guard.  “You look like you sensed something.”

He’ll just fudge the truth a little.  “Taiyou’s not in your guys’ room.”

“Yeah.  He said he was gonna go get laid.”

He frowns, realizing exactly what he was just focusing on.

Meaning Hinata was, too.  Watching.  With her Byakugan.  That whole time.

Heat rises to his face, and he hopes that Eizan can’t tell.

“What, you noticed him fucking?” Eizan asks, voice quiet but full of amusement.

“I didn’t mean to!” Naruto defends awkwardly.  “I just didn’t know where he went at this time of night.”  And accidentally peeping on Taiyou is honestly not what has him hot under the collar.

Eizan silently laughs.  “Damn Naruto, you sure act innocent sometimes.”

Naruto shakes his head, opting to answer with silence because Eizan is far from the truth.

The truth being that he's always been just another guy who laughs at lewd humor, who enjoys looking at a curvy body, and has imagined doing more despite having so little experience.

He doesn’t know how he’s going to be able to look at Hinata during the shift change.  He doesn’t think he’ll even be able to handle being next to her during their joint off-shift, he doesn’t know what he’ll say, how he’ll act.

If he’ll even be able to get intelligible words out!

If he’ll even be able to look at anything but her lips!...

He can't even think about her, really, because he keeps thinking about...

There’s no way he can do this mission without acting like a fool.

But he has to.

He has to act like he has himself together.

He has to be reliable and confident.

He has to…

He has to get her to kiss him again.

She can’t sleep.

Even though the other Guardians are dead-asleep, their pulses and energy too even to possibly be faked, she can’t relax.

If she had to rank nights according to terrible-ness, this one is up there in the top.

Practically confessing her feelings about Naruto in front of Eizan and Taiyou in a bar.

Kissing Naruto in public for her first time.  She can’t live with herself.

And then to top it all off, she wants to claw her eyes out for seeing too much information about Taiyou.

She didn’t even watch the entire time, but she had to check for Are they done, yet?  Oh, no.

Minutes later, check again.  Are they done now?  No??

She thought drunk hook-ups were supposed to be quick, messy affairs, but she ended up sitting outside on a distant enough rooftop for nearly an hour with just her self-loathing to pass the time.

And here she is in bed, awake, as if she didn’t already scold herself enough.

She doesn’t know how she can face Naruto in the morning, what she’ll tell him, how they’ll continue working together from here on out.

What if he starts acting distant toward her?

What if he’s creeped out by her?

She wants to take it all back.

Take it all back…

She can remember his skin on her lips.  His golden tan, warm and giving.

His handsome face and solid arm in her hands.

His scent, not so much a smell, but a calming aura that filled her senses.

It’s what she always dreamed of.

It was everything, he was everything, better than she ever imagined.

But.

Not anything close to in the way she wanted.

And now she wishes that none of it happened.

She shoves tight fists against her face, frustration and regret creating an unbearable turmoil that makes her grit her teeth, her skin burn up with shame.

She wants to scream!

Yet she keeps it bottled up inside, the pressure making her rattle until she lets it all out in one horrid breath, her fists pounding into the bed with an audible thump.

Unshed tears bead hot around her eyes even though she knows she doesn’t deserve to feel sorry for herself.

What has she done?  Why did she do that?

What could Naruto possibly be thinking?

...It’s not fair at all.

Not fair at all.

[oyesmendes]

The Coffee Roasters - Chapter two

a/n: we’re here!! this one’s a little sad and angsty so i’m sorry!!! and also, i would like to know how you would like the next chapter to go so leave me some suggestions in my ask :)

Long black - two shots of espresso poured into a glass of hot water; two lovers thrusted into reality.

when Sophie woke up to sunlight streaming through the curtains, she knew she was fucked. Never in the twenty three years of her life did she wake up after the sun rose, not even when the cafe closed during the holidays. her hand was resting on Niall’s chest, his arm draped across her waist lazily. She turned slowly, careful to not wake him up as she turned on her phone to see a dozen text messages and missed calls from her family

Dad: Where are you? come to the store now.

Mom: darling, are you coming to the cafe today? Your father is worried

Harvey: I tried to cover for you, but it can only last so long. Good luck Mei ;-) ps hope you used protection

Sophie rolled her eyes at her brother’s message, only replying with a middle finger emoji and a be there soon before she felt Niall’s arms snake around her. She lets him pull her close to his body, turning around in the process to face him. Niall’s eyes were still shut as he hummed under his breath. Sophie thinks she could get used to this - to him, and then reality hits her like bricks when Niall mutters a string of swear words under his breath. She pulls away, looking at him confused.

“Sorry petal, I totally forgot to tell my manager I was staying the night in Brighton. I’m supposed to be at a shoot right now” Niall rubs his face with his hands a little too hard just to shake away the sleep in him. He doesn’t remember the last time he’s slept this well with someone in the bed. Sophie chuckles, shaking her head “well I guess that makes two of us. was supposed to be at the cafe…” she looks at the time on her phone screen, “three hours ago.” They both lay flat on their backs, staring up at the ceiling. A comfortable silence filled the room, both their hands intertwined with each other's. They should be worried about the consequences, the repercussions of their decisions, but right now all they cared about was the person laying by their side. Sophie gets up first, running her fingers through her hair as she sits up on the bed. Niall soon follows, peppering kisses on her cheek all the way down to her collarbone. She grabs his hand and he follows as if they’ve been doing this for years, and leads him to the bathroom where the twin bathroom sinks were waiting. She hands him a new toothbrush - a permanent one, not one of those you steal from a hotel - and they begin their morning routine. They were quiet as they moved around the apartment to get ready for the day; Niall was on the phone with his manager, looking like a child that was being berated by his mother and Sophie was making them coffees and breakfast. Both of them had the same thought in their head - will they see each other again? Was this just a one night stand? definitely not. Whatever they had between them, the comfort, the teenage excitement of love was something that was so real. Yes, they’ve only met 2 days ago, but what fell between them was so familiar, it felt like they’ve known each other for years and you can’t say that to many people in your life. Niall finishes up his call (or scolding, it was more like a scolding) and wraps Sophie into his embrace which makes her smile all too wide before she spins around.

“Here’s your coffee, and a day old croissant that I’ve put ham and cheese in. Take them on your ride back to London” She hands the bag and coffee cup to him, her eyes never meeting his. He frowns, setting the food aside and tilting her chin up so she’s looking straight into the ocean blue eyes.

“What’s wrong, petal?” He knows what’s wrong, he just doesn’t have the balls to say it. Sophie shakes her head, but her heart spoke faster than her brain could stop it.

“Is this it?” She asked, her voice cracks at the end with tears threatening to spill. Come on Sophie, you’re not going to cry over a boy you met two days ago. Get it together. Except she is crying a little and she is utterly in love with the Irish boy standing in front of her; and she’s terrified. Terrified that she’s going to lose it all in this moment before she could even begin anything. Niall catches on, pressing a kiss to her lips in which she returns hastily.

“Of course not, petal. you’re less than an hour away, I will come back to you” And that calms her down just by a bit. He envelopes her in a hug, swaying as they hold each other as tight as their bodies would allow them to.

-

Niall kept his promise. despite the promo tour for Heartbreak Weather and countless of interviews, he tried his absolute best to keep his promise. They were constantly texting and talking on FaceTime whenever their breaks coincided; and when Niall was in London with more than an hour to spare, he’d drive down to Brighton just to see Sophie for less than thirty minutes.

“M’so glad you’re here” Sophie whispered, her head resting on Niall’s shoulders as they sat by the steps of the back door to the cafe.

“Me too, petal.”

However, this long-distance teenage love could only last for so long. Niall was soon due to go on his world tour with no time to spare, and lets not even talk about visiting Sophie. From trying to spend every moment with her soon turned to weekly FaceTime calls that lasted no longer than 2 hours because Niall simply had “no time”. Which was true to a certain extent, he had rehearsals almost every single day if not, he was thrown into some meeting or interview where he was barely paying any attention.

"I can't keep doing this, Niall" Sophie shifts, the phone now propped up against the wall. Those words that came out of her mouth suddenly felt like a tonne of bricks raining from the sky.

"Just a little bit more Soph, I'm gonna be home-"

"and then what?" she cuts him off, her head pounding from the lack of caffeine in her system. It was 5am in Brighton, and Sophie was up an hour early because she couldn't get Niall out of her mind. She picked up the phone to call him, not caring about whatever event or activity that he was in so she could settle it once and for all. at least she was hoping to.

"because from the looks of it, i don't think we're going anywhere. I've barely spoken to you all week, and i don't think that's going to change until you make up your mind on what you want" She’s folding her arms now, and Niall knows that's a clear sign that she's not pleased. He sighs, hands bunching up the pillow next to him. Niall was supposed to be at the arena 10 minutes ago, but here he was sitting in his hotel room with the tension thick in the air between him and his girl.

"bub i just need you to hold on a little longer- a week? i'll be home in a week, yeah i can do that-" before he could even get an answer from her, the line cut off. Sophie slams her phone face flat onto the desk in front of her, a loud groan leaving her mouth. She couldn't do this, not like this when everything was so uncertain. Come on, Niall couldn't even give her a proper answer over the phone. Sophie had a strong character, any of her friends would admit that. She was level headed, confident and a sunshine for all. but right now, all of those characteristics were thrown straight out of the window; all because of one boy.

-

It was Friday evening, the slowest day of the week so the Hoang siblings were by the front counter catching up with each other. Harvey was bragging about the blonde he met the same day you had your encounter with Niall (yes surprise surprise! They started dating!) and Austin was well, talking about something that has to do with his online classes. Sophie had her mind somewhere else, eyes fixated on her phone waiting for some kind of message or call from Niall. they haven't spoken since that day (well, Niall has sent her multiple good morning and night texts but Soph really couldn't be bothered) she needed him to say something substantial, she needed him to use his words. something he could do so well when he wrote, but when it came to talking to the one he loved, it's as if the man doesn't have a mouth on his face.

“Hello? Earth to Soph?” Harvey was waving his hands in front of her face, giving her a questionable look.

“Sorry, I zoned out. What were you saying about Sarah?” He rolled his eyes at his sister, “its Samantha, and I was asking you what do you want to have for dinner? I could go pick something-“ before Harvey could finish, the familiar jingle of the door with a very familiar figure standing at the door caught the attention of the siblings.

“Yo! Nialler! Haven’t seen you in the longest time man” Harvey and Austin both gave Niall fist bumps while Sophie stayed behind them, arms folded with her head down. When her brothers sensed the lack of enthusiasm from their sister, they both gave a look at Niall who showed the same emotions.

"we're gonna leave you two to talk" Austin rubber his sister's back before leaving to lock the front doors of the cafe and putting up the "closed" sign. Sophie let out another sigh before proceeding to wipe the counter, and steam the machines - anything she could do to keep her mind off the irish man standing on the other side of the counter.

"Soph...please" he stretched his hand across the counter, softly taking hers into his grasp. She squeezed the towel in her hand tilted her head back, legs bouncing as she willed her tears not to fall. Niall knew her like an open book, letting her hand go while he made his way round the counter. He was never allowed behind it, Alex never letting him around the coffee machines for the fear that he might distract his daughter at work. But this time Niall ignored all the rules, crossing over the barrier between them to pull her into his arms. At first, Sophie didn't move, she didn't hug back until Niall spoke.

"i'm here petal, i'm here and i'm sorry" those words were enough for her tears to fall and she was now full on sobbing into Niall's shoulder.

"i missed you" Niall choked out. Sophie pushed Niall back, hands resting on his chest as she took in his features. No, she couldn’t bare to break up with him. She threw her head back, sighed and scrunched the fabric of Niall’s hoodie.

“You’re making this so difficult.” Sophie whispered.

“Making what difficult, love? I’m here, I’m finally here” Niall was confused by her words and to be honest, the inner turmoil that Sophie was facing felt 10 times worse.

“This! This whole thing, your blue eyes and boisterous laughter; your singing and dancing; and the god damn world tour, Niall. Everything is difficult” She leaned back against the counter as Niall’s hands drop to his side.

“What- what do you mean?” Sophie snapped, or rather she was snapping at Niall and she couldn’t help it. She wanted it to stop, she wanted him to stop.

“I don’t know! I should’ve seen it coming, and trust me I tried to prepare myself for all of this” she let out a sad laughter. “You’re Niall fricking Horan, how the fuck can you be my boyfriend?!” Sophie turned and slammed the counter in front of her. Her chest was heavy, and everything started to hurt. Is this what letting go of real love feels like?

Niall’s arms snaked around her waist, pulling her close to his body. Sophie tried to fight it, but she was too tired after being so consumed by the thoughts of Niall and this entire relationship. She let herself melt into his arms, quiet sobs leaving her lips. He swayed from side to side, his head buried in her hair while he let her cry.

“I’m sorry petal, I really am”

“I know”