#i feel like i'm starting that age most ppl have at 18/19 of exploring and just vibing except i should have gone through that then
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Sorry for another vent post but here goes
#like i'm not looking for a relationship ok ? but i met this guy and we've been hooking yp#but like he is being all sweet and caring and he is great don't get me wrong#he's like eddie munson i'm not gonna lie#but at the same time he doesn't get my jokes and when i make a sarcastic comment or something funny he always thinks i'm being honest#and then he's too sweet if it makes sense in normal convos? BUT if i am ganuinely distressed (which i am a lot you guys know)#he is just not very emotionally intelligent 😬 and like it's all fun and wtv but i feel like he might like me more than i like him#and i called him babe once bc i had this girl friend who calls everyone babe and i spent like 3 days with her so i called him that#and now he always calls me babe and i'm like 😐 pls stop but i can't tell him to stop bc it will seem rude#and yeah my friends that know him are like he's such a cool guy and so sweet and everything and it looks like we're dating#but like we're not man we're not i met him a few weeks ago#anyway i think in reality i'm trying to find bad things about him just so i can justify not liking him and sabotage the whole thing bc +#+ i'm too afraid lmao#i think i'm emotionally unavailable and don't want a relationship or feel ready for it at all#i feel like i'm starting that age most ppl have at 18/19 of exploring and just vibing except i should have gone through that then#but i never got the change bc of abusive relationships and being at home and not having freedom to just exist#and now i do and i feel like if i start dating someone i'll lose my freedom again#which should not even happen in a healthy relationship but that's how i feel#maybe will talk about this to my therapist see what he says#i think i know what he will say like 'you're just afraid don't think about it too much tell him how you feel'#and i HAVE told him generally how i feel and that i don't want to move mad about it and he was like 'no were just getting to know eachother
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tagged by the homie @flamejob for this questionnaire
1. why did you choose your url?
I saw it forever ago on live journal as a roleplayer's username. It's been my url here for..... A while now. It's also dumb and aesthetic
2. any side blogs?
I use side blogs to url horde. I had one off of my wwii blog for edgy stuff
3. how long have you been on tumblr?
2010....
4. do you have a queue tag?
No
5. why did you start your blog in the first place?
This was meant to be a personal way back in 2012/2013, and to better explore my old Hollywood interest. It's sort of divulged into a myriad of interests
6. why did you choose your icon?
Him
7. why did you choose your header?
Aus der traum. Edgy jokes aside, my interest in wwii is long lived. Previous one was my little romanticism with heavy industry
8. what’s your post with the most notes?
This post
9. how many mutuals do you have?
A small handful and I love all of them 💙
10. how many followers do you have?
327
11. how many ppl do you follow?
An embarrassing amount due to the age of this blog. A lot of them have become inactive or simply deactivated. I'd say that I consistently see the same 20-40ish people on my dash tho which is nice
12. have you ever made a shitpost?
Isn't that everything we ever do on this site
13. how many times do you use tumblr a day?
It's super interesting that I'm back to regularly using it. There was about a two year window where if log in maybe once a month, reblog two or three things and forget about it. Idk. Life is weird in relation to social media platforms
14. have you ever had a fight with another blog?
I don't think so lmao
15. how do you feel about need to rb posts?
16. do you like tag games?
Yes omg! I enjoy it so much and I appreciate when anyone tags me. They're fun and it's a great way for mutuals to interact
17. do you like ask games?
Yes 😌
18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?
Hands down the connoisseur of all things Bruce, @brucespringsteen
19. do you have a crush on a mutual?
I love all of you, but idk. I've done online/ldr before in the past. I've met a handful of online mutuals irl, and my platonic soulmate that I'd destroy the world for, I met online in the very early days of YouTube (2007). It's very situational. I don't have a crush on anyone online tho
20. tags
I know this is a lot! Don't feel any pressure to do this :')
@interimsliebenden, @branwell-bronte, @marklanegan, @discogoth, @brucespringsteen, @sdss141613b, @mustybooksmelll, @storm-scapes, @jimphelps, @rogue-coyote, @therearepeoplewho
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If I'm doing all the asks then so are you.
>.> fineeee
1. If you didn’t have to sleep, what would you do with the extra time?
Play video games, I’m not gonna lie about that.
2. What’s your favourite piece of clothing you own/owned?
I have a black dress I bought for myself a couple years ago that makes me look like a badass Bond villain. And I look sexy as all hell in it.
3. What hobby would you get into if time and money weren’t an issue?
I want to make custom dolls idk
4. What would your perfect room look like?
PINK i’m a fucking girly girl
5. How often do you play sports?
Never...I am not into sports. Watching others though is fun
6. What fictional place would you most like to go?
Diagon Alley
7. What job would you be terrible at?
Anything involving math. So I would make an awful accountant.
8. If you could turn any activity into an Olympic sport, what would you have a good chance at winning medal for?
Being sick apparently...nah I’m pretty good at graphic design I think
9. When was the last time you climbed a tree?
I am afraid of heights so never
10. What is the most annoying habit other people have?
loud chewing, I will want to murder you I Promise
11. What job do you think you’d be good at?
Anything with animals, I have a passion for them
12. What skill would you like to master?
A different language. Being bi-lingual would be cool. I hate English.
13. What would be the most amazing adventure to go on?
Oh fuck I want to travel. Even to places considered “dangerous”. I want to go everywhere, I have A NEED. I’m a sucker for those exploration videos on youtube.
14. If you had unlimited funds to build a house that you would live in for the rest of your life, what would the finished house look like?
Firstly it would be a beach house because I love water and beaches. Secondly, it’d have at least four bedrooms, maybe six. And a full sized basement. I want it to look Magical As Fuck. For reasons. There will be an aquarium in it.
15. What’s your favourite drink?
Coke. The drink.
16. What state or country do you never want to go back to?
I miss Michigan a lot. I loved it there.
17. What songs have you completely memorized?
A lot?? too vague
18. What game or movie universe would you most like to live in?
STARDEW VALLEY. Sustainable farming is sexy.
19. What do you consider to be your best friend?
@sedris-the-meme-king
20. Are you usually early or late?
Early. Like twenty minutes early. Anxiety fuels me.
21. What pets did you have while you were growing up?
A lot of cats, a few dogs, hamsters, and a couple bunnies. I love animals.
22. When people come to you for help, what do they usually want help with?
Relationship advice
23. What takes up too much of your time?
Depression
24. What do you wish you knew more about?
Space law. Which is weird. The concept of space really scares me but it’s also a little fascinating.
25. What would be your first question after waking up from being cryogenically frozen for 100 years?
“is my cat ok?”
26. What are some small things that make your day better?
Getting random texts from ppl.
27. Who’s your go to band or artist when you cannot decide on something to listen to?
Rihanna or Halsey
28. What’s the best way to start the day?
By sleeping in a little longer
29. What shows are you into?
Anything that’s paranormal, pretty much anything on TLC, Gordon Ramsey is Good
30. Who has impressed you most with what they’ve accomplished?
@floating-in-the-dark for being a good bean
31. What age do you wish you could permanently be?
18. That was a fun age dude.
32. What TV show or movie do you refuse to watch?
13 Reasons Why, Game of Thrones, I’m petty
33. What would be your ideal way to spent the weekend?
Video games, ice cream, kissing, things of that nature, maybe going to the movies, exploring a haunted abandoned hospital, casual things you know
34. What is something that is considered a luxury, but you don’t think you could live without?
My phone
35. What’s your claim to fame?
Idk what this means???
36. What’s something you like to do the old-fashioned way?
Dating. I’m sort of a cliche geek ok.
37. What’s your favourite genre of book or movie?
Horror for movie and fantasy for books
38. What have you only recently formed an opinion about?
God phoning. Non-pagans won’t get this.
39. What’s the best single day on the calendar?
The first of every month because it feels sorta refreshing
40. What are you interested in that most people haven’t heard of?
Sexual education
that’s a joke but I am also serious
41. How do you relax after a hard day of work?
I watch youtube videos and play some games, or RP
42. What was the best book or series that you’ve ever read?
The Maze Runner. Sorta corny but it was enjoyable.
43. What’s the farthest you’ve ever been from home?
California. 10/10 would go back.
44. What is the most heartwarming thing you’ve ever seen?
“I would blink” out of context this makes no sense but it meant a lot to me in context
45. What is the most annoying question people ask you?
“Are you SURE you’re __ age?” I am small, I sound 12, but yes I promise I AM TWENTY
46. What could you give a 30-minute presentation on with absolutely no preparation?
Harry Potter at any given moment. Esp Draco Malfoy.
47. What is something you think everyone should do at least once in their lives?
Tbh??? Move away to a completely new place that you have no connections in. That sounds crazy stupid but really, it was the best choice I ever made.
48. Would you rather go hang gliding or whitewater rafting?
Whitewater rafting
49. What’s your dream car?
1967 Thunderbird bitches
50. What’s worth spending more on to get the best?
Make-up, and bath stuff
51. What is something that a ton of people are obsessed with but you just don’t get the point of?
Game of Thrones lmao
52. What are you most looking forward to in the next 10 years?
School. I can’t wait to start college in the fall.
53. Where is the most interesting place you’ve been?
UP Michigan
54. What’s something you’ve been meaning to try but just haven’t gotten around to it?
There are lot of ways to answer this.
I want to try a ghost pepper lmao
55. What’s the best thing that happened to you last week?
I started talking to someone really sweet
56. What piece of entertainment do you wish you could erase from your mind so that you could experience for the first time again?
Undertale tbh
57. If all jobs had the same pay and hours, what job would you like to have?
I’d work at a graveyard no joke
58. What amazing thing did you do that no one was around to see?
Absolutely nothing my dudes
59. How different was your life one year ago?
Extremely different and I sorta miss it
60. What quirks do you have?
I wiggle my mouth from side to side when I am in thought, I tend to rub my nose randomly, I walk on the balls of my feet
61. What would you rate 10/10?
@funkypanda
62. What fad or trend do you hope comes back?
I!! Want!! 90s!! Fashion!! Back!!
63. What’s the most interesting piece of art you’ve seen?
anything @floating-in-the-dark has done
64. What kind of art do you enjoy most?
See above answer
65. What do you hope never changes?
Most of my friendships
66. What city would you most like to live in?
Londonnnnn
67. What movie title best describes your life?
The Boss Baby
68. What did you decide to do the work you are doing now?
Huh????
69. What’s the best way a person can spend their time?
Being kind to others
70. If you suddenly became a master at woodworking, what would you make?
Some really weird shit dude
71. Where is the most relaxing place you’ve ever been?
UP Michigan lol
72. What is the luckiest thing that has happened to you?
Meeting my best friend
73. Where would you rather be from?
Canada
74. What are some things you’ve had to unlearn?
My temper, some bad habits that were formed from anxiety
75. What are you looking forward to in the coming months?
School, getting a puppy, summer
76. What website do you usually go on when you have time off?
Tumblrr
77. Where would you spend all your time if you could?
Japannnnn or South Korea
78. What is special about the place you grew up?
Everyone was a community. We all supported each other.
79. What age do you want to live to?
100+ cause I fear death a lot
80. What are you most likely to become famous for?
The Biggest Baby Award
81. What are you absolutely determined to do?
Finish school and become a zoologist cause that’s the dream
82. What is the most impressive thing you know how to do?
I can code and shit????? idk
83. What do you wish you knew more about?
Space law
84. What question would you most like to know the answer to?
“will I ever be successful at anything”
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