#i feel like i am getting distanced from my nct mutuals and it makes me s a d☹

[jenomark]

Would you be willing to do an NCT 127 reaction to like almost accidentally falling into bed with their friend but like goin hard for only a sec before their emotions overwhelm them and how they transition to romantic sex or even just like passion vs hookup like it began?

Taeil: “Can you help me put the sheets on my bed?” Taeil asked. You stood in the doorway to his bedroom. Taeil held up his midnight blue sheets and looked at you with a helpless look on his face. Without saying anything, you grabbed two corners and started towards his bed. Both of you couldn’t help but smile at how ridiculous of a request it was. You tucked one end of the sheet under a corner, and Taeil did the same. “I always hated making my bed.” you said, making small talk. “Me too.” Taeil said. He went to tuck the other corner, but your tucked end loosened itself and flew across the mattress. “Oh.” was all Taeil could say. You reached for the end and tucked it again, but this time, his corner flew towards yours. Feeling frustrated, Taeil jumped on his bed and held the corner down with his knees. Laughing, you did the same. Both of you reached for the last corner at the same time, your hands touching each other. Taeil reeled back and looked at you. There was an apology on his lips, but he couldn’t get it out. Feeling the flush rise to his cheeks, he moved to tuck the very last corner himself. When he did, all corners untucked and rolled towards the middle. Exasperated, he fell back onto his bed and you followed him, looking up at the ceiling together. Without another word, Taeil rolled over and kissed you. You knew it was coming, so you kissed him back. You touched the front of his pants, palming his cock over his jeans. “Do you want me to help you with something else?” you asked. Taeil nodded, kissing you with a lot of passion. It was meant to be just sex, but there were feelings lingering underneath the surface. Taeil stopped trying to remove your clothes and looked at you. He stroked the side of your face and smiled. “I think you’re beautiful.” he said.

Johnny: Fucking Johnny as friends had it’s pros and cons. The pros: he ate you out until he was satisfied with your reaction, he always kept things respectful, and gave you the best dick of your life. There were cons, but you weren’t sure they were actually bad. You had feelings, and you thought you saw the same happy-in-love grin on his face that you wore whenever you were through with each other for the night. Being with him was always a fun time. You knew you could come to Johnny at any hour and he would receive you well. There was a connection there that transcended your usual sexual encounters. You enjoyed being in his company, hearing him laugh, and watching him get ready in the morning. Falling for him was never in the arrangement, and it put a dampener on a lot of things. “Hey.” he said, taking your jacket as soon as you entered the door. He could read the stress on your face, could see how you carried it in your shoulders. “Hi.” you answered back. Johnny brought you into a warm embrace. You felt like you could melt completely into his body and die happily. When he pulled a part, you kissed him and felt the softness of his belly underneath his shirt. It was your signal for him, and it let him know that you wanted him now. But the time felt different, and he could feel it, too. Normally, you would grab at each other like you couldn’t breathe unless one of you were naked. This time, he moved slow, his hands seeming to pulsate over your body. You felt overwhelmed, like you could cry. “Love me.” was all you could say. Johnny sank his head into your breasts and kissed the skin. When you felt his mouth move south, you grabbed a hand full of his hair and vowed to have a talk with him later.

Taeyong: He had never had a female friend. That is how your relationship began: your obsession with making sure he had someone to confide in, and his need for your companionship. You would lay in bed together, your head on his chest, his hand low on your back. Your mutual friends would ask if you were dating, and although you told them no, you were never sure yourself. Taeyong called you his friend, sometimes his best friend. You texted every day, you came running when he needed help, and he was the only man in your life that made you feel appreciated. There was a line that shouldn’t be crossed, but that line was fading fast. “What are you thinking about?” Taeyong asked. You were in his bed, watching the way his face changed whenever he watched a Youtube video with animals in it. He made your heart ache.  “Everything.” you said. Taeyong put his phone down and turned toward you, his face just inches from yours. You had kissed once, but it was so quick that both of you pretended like it never happened. “Thinking of me? I am everything.” he said, smiling. You turned your head away. You wanted to kiss him, and you could sense that he wanted to kiss you, too. Taeyong’s hand touched yours. He pulled your arm and draped it over his body. The kiss came soon after. You rolled over on top of him, feeling his body underneath yours. He was hard, his cock sitting just below your pelvis. There was a moment where you stared at each other, questioning if things should go further. Taeyong made the first move, going deeper into a kiss, his hands on your ass. You touched each other like you were starving, your bodies wanting to fulfill a hunger. “Slow.” he said as you went for the button on his jeans. “I want to feel your everything.”

Yuta: You thought you wanted him because you were sad. You told yourself it was the reason you went back to him. After all, it had been that way with every guy before him. There was something about Yuta that your heart was addicted to, and that is how he differed. You would fuck him and fuck him, your bodies coming together like it should mean nothing, but it meant everything. He was a good man. He let you have him, even when you both knew you should not have been together without talking about what you were. Every time you promised each other you would stop hooking up, you always came back to close the gap. Most days, it was you who broke the promise. You were on your hands and knees too many times, his cock slamming into you, his fingernails digging into the extra weight you carried around your waist. It was hard to look him in the eyes sometimes. When he slowed, you looked back at him. He hadn’t come inside of you yet, hadn’t flopped onto the bed, sweat dripping down his abdomen. “Are you okay?” you asked. Yuta pulled out and flipped you onto your back so that you were staring up at him. He leaned down so he was dangerously close to your face, your eyes struggling to look at him. You had never fucked this close before, and the intimacy made your legs feel like jelly. Yuta entered you, his grunts stifled by a kiss to your lips. You didn’t know what to do, where to look, or what to touch. “Are you okay?” he asked, echoing your question from earlier. You nodded frantically, a rush of feelings chaining you to his heart.

Doyoung: It was a game. One of you gets blindfolded and has to pick someone from the circle. You take them into a bedroom and do whatever you want to them for a half hour. It was Doyoung’s turn to be blindfolded. You sat in your chair and watched him go around, licking his lips because of his nerves. You knew he wanted to pick the girl he had a crush on. He would be drawn to her, like a bee to a pretty flower. Doyoung buzzed around the circle and stopped in front of you, only he didn’t know it was you. He held out his hand for you to take, his fingers trembling slightly. When you placed your hand in his, the crowd of players cheered. You looked over at his crush and tried to apologize to her with your eyes. Doyoung was only your friend, nothing more. Still, you kept a grip on his hand and dragged him behind you, finding a bedroom for the both of you to go into. When you shut the door, it felt like there was no going back. “Who are you?” he asked. You looked at him, a face you’ve always known, but somehow, looked like a stranger before you. You kissed his lips softly, your fingertips holding his chin. You could read his facial expressions well. Doyoung knew it wasn’t his crush. There was a brief moment where he looked like he would turn away and leave, but he moved forward and pushed you back onto the bed. He pinned your arms to the mattress and nipped at your neck. You could feel his cock growing in his pants. You were aroused for him too, your body opening up for his. The way he kissed you was needy. There was a certain freedom with him not knowing who you were, but you wanted to know what he would think if he knew. You removed his blindfold, slipping it from his eyes like a secret. It took a while for his eyes adjust, to fully grasp that it was you underneath him. When he did, he smiled. He kissed you a little softer, and let his hands sweep down your sides. “I’m glad it’s you.” he said.

Jaehyun: You danced the pain away. Your date stood you up, so you let the music carry you away until you felt nothing. Your friends watched you sway in the middle of the club floor by yourself. Most of them wanted to let you be, but Jaehyun couldn’t do that. He grabbed your hand to let you know he was near, but he kept his distance on the floor. “You don’t have to do this.” you shouted. Even through the dark, you could see Jaehyun’s face light up with a smile. “I want to. Friends don’t let friends cry alone to EDM music.” he said. Afterwards, he walked you home. You wanted to open up to him about how you felt, but you didn’t want to bother him. Jaehyun kept your mind off of things by talking about nonsense, which made you feel better. When you arrived at your door, the sadness crept back in. “I don’t want to be alone.” you said, unable to look him in the eyes. Jaehyun followed you inside. “Let’s watch a movie.” he suggested. You turned around and kissed him. You didn’t know what had gotten into you, or why you had done it. You weren’t aware of any feelings you had for him, but when you kissed him, everything felt serious. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.” you said, touching your lips. Jaehyun rushed at you, kissing you back. The way you came together felt natural, your hands clinging to the sad parts of each other. “We shouldn’t.” you whispered. “Says who?” Jaehyun said. The way you affected each other felt desperate, until you fell into bed and everything began to slow down. “You deserve better,” he said. “Let me show you.”  

WinWin: It might have been a lapse in judgement, but at the moment, neither of you cared. WinWin was yanking off your skinny jeans and underwear with all of his strength. When your legs were free, he went straight for you, his tongue parting your pussy. It was weird having your friend eating you out, but it felt so good that you could hardly object. You were on the verge of coming when he stopped. You used your arms to bring yourself backwards onto the bed. He took off his shirt fast, moving at you with alarming speed. His lips were on yours, his hands pushing up your shirt and bra to get at your breasts. His other hand roamed downwards, spreading your legs so he could finger you. “Let me please you.” you moaned, not really wanting him to stop. “No.” WinWin said. His mouth was on you again. Feeling useless, you slowly removed your shirt and bra until you were naked on his bed. “Fuck.” you whispered. Everything felt so good, and you wondered how you had gotten so lucky. “Fuck me.” you said. Abruptly, WinWin stopped and came up to meet your lips. When you made eye contact with him, time felt like it was slowing down. You saw him as he was: your friend, the boy who always made you feel seen. He smiled from ear-to-ear, probably feeling the same emotions that were wrecking you. “Fuck you?” he asked. You nodded, a laugh bubbling to your lips. You wanted to talk to him, to tell him you never imagined anything like this happening between you, but WinWin’s mouth was back to worshiping your body, and his cock was waiting to do as you asked.

Jungwoo: “You sleep on my bed. I will sleep on the floor.” Jungwoo said. You began to protest, but he told you his decision was final. You knew why he was doing it, but you didn’t agree with it. Jungwoo set up a makeshift bed on his floor and laid down, pulling the blankets up to his chin. You had never slept in his bed before and never normally would have, but the storm outside was too brutal to drive home in. You slid into his sheets and rested your head on his pillow. Everything smelled just like him, and felt as warm as he did. You leaned over and turned off the lamp, the only light coming from the neon sign belonging to the bar across the street. “Are you comfortable?” Jungwoo asked. You leaned over his bed and peered down at him, “I would be more comfortable if you slept next to me. This bed is big enough for the both of us.” He didn’t answer, so you laid back down. A few seconds later, you felt the opposite end of the bed dip down. You couldn’t make out much of his face, but you could feel him next to you. The sexual tension was too thick to ignore. You rolled over onto your side and faced him. He did the same. The space between you both felt alive. Without giving much warning, Jungwoo leaned over a little. You met him halfway and collided your lips with his. You held each other, touching one another like you both had never felt someone in your lives. “Wait.” Jungwoo said, pushing you away. He was emotional, and your eyes adjusted enough to see the panic on his face. You thought he would get up and end the thing you should have always started, but instead, Jungwoo looked down and said, “I don’t want to rush. I want to remember everything. Let’s slow down. We have all night.”

Mark: Drunk Mark looks like sober Mark, but he doesn’t feel like him. Drunk Mark is cold, his body hard and foreign. He says stupid things and doesn’t mean them, makes stupid moves and regrets them. The Mark you know well is the embodiment of warmth, his smile trapping a thousand suns. You are too drunk to realize he is holding your hand. When you realize, it feels too late to take the feeling back that is blooming in your chest. “We should..” Mark starts to say. “We should what?” you ask. Mark lets go of your hand and grabs your face to pull you in for a kiss. He was only supposed to walk you home, two drunkards lost in the darkness. He finds your lips and you kiss him back. Feelings spread throughout your body. You need him, need to have his hands all over you. Mark pushes you inside your apartment and feels your stomach underneath your shirt. Everything moves fast: your pants on the floor and Mark’s morals lying at his feet. You fall into bed like strangers, and not friends. He kisses your neck, his hands roaming everywhere. You want him badly. He looks into your eyes and you tell him to fuck you. It’s the alcohol talking, and the lust. Mark’s fingers are on you and in you, the feelings making the room spin like a merry-go-round. When you feel his cock, the room stills. He fucks you like he can fuck all of his feelings away if he just moves faster, and deeper. “Mark.” you say. His name slows him down. He holds onto your thighs and looks down at you. You tell him to get off and lay on his back, so that you can get on top. You straddled him and let his cock fill you up. You move slowly, your body controlling the way you feel, much better than your heart can.

[kflirts]

“just friends.”

“you’re not nearly as smart as you think” and “you wanna bet?” for nct’s mark (a dom mark smut please!)

word count: 2.3k

summary: there was 2 requests with “you wanna bet?” for mark so this kinda works for both i guess ? this is pretty long for my own writing and it took me a while to write up lolz anywHo. hope you enjoy. -s.

warnings: mentions of blood ? 

Your relationship with Mark Lee was something different - to put it in summary. You weren’t actually in a relationship with him, you were just mere friends. You met through a mutual friend; whom you don’t even talk to anymore. Some stupid drama over her ex boyfriend who you didn’t even like like that. But that girl was far too stubborn for her own good and thus a friendship was ended, however your friendship with Mark was still in tact.

Your friendship was filled with movie nights, and 3 am calls. Nights out, and long car rides. To an outside view; it seemed like the pair of you were in an actual relationship, and it practically was; minus the intimacy. There were petnames involved, you stole his hoodies sometimes and when a guy you didn’t want hitting on you, hit on you, he stood in.

The whole, “hey, dude, back off, she has a boyfriend,” line always did the trick except on the one night when things took a turn for the worst. 

One of Mark’s friends, Yuta, had decided to invite a handful of his own friends out to a bar, including yourself and a couple other girls you knew. The group had already been out at one bar, and when you had reached the second, you decided to grab the first round. 

You waited at the bar, sat on a wooden stool as you waited for the first tray of drinks, when the guy came up to you, he was already wasted and the stench of alcohol made you want to gag.

“Hey dollface, can I buy you a drink?”

“Uhm, no thanks, I’m fine.” 

But he still persisted as you came back to the bar after dropping the first tray off at your table to grab a tray of shots. But this time it got too far, with a simple “I’m pretty sure none of those guys can treat you like I would, babe.”

You felt sick to your stomach, you clearly were uncomfortable but the bartender was too busy to even acknowledge the problem that was happening, and you didn’t even know if he would still be there until you left. 

The hands that slide across your waist made you jump until the familiar voice had perked up, “she has a boyfriend, and I’m pretty sure she wouldn’t want your greasy ass anyway.”

With a peck on your cheek, Mark told you to take the tray of shots that now were in front of you back to your table. You had only managed to get half way there when you heard a crack and a loud groan. Snapping your head, there lay, holding his nose, Mark Lee.  

You immediately rushed to him, almost breaking your ankle by slipping on someones spilled beer, and helped him up. “Jesus, Mark.” 

As he pinched the tip of his nose, you turned your back to the guy who had been hitting on you, and had just hit your best friend. You don’t know if it was the alcohol in your system or just the feeling of anger which caused you to lift your foot and kick him in the crotch. The entire bar fell silent once again, as you managed to drag Mark out of their, and call a cab. 

“You’re a fucking idiot.” You tell him, once you’re both in the car, helping him hold his nose, your hand covered in his blood now, but you can feel him smirk. 

“But I’m your idiot.”

“Shut up.” 

The pair of you managed to get into your apartment with minimal blood spilled, but your hands were still stained, and so was his face. “Go sit on a counter, I’ll fix you up.” You tell him, heading into your bathroom to grab your first aid kit. Studying to become a nurse sure had it’s perks when it came down to your friends. The kit had everything you needed and a few other things you kept in there; like needles for stitches, and numbing liquid inside a couple. 

Instead of waiting patiently for you, Mark had decided to look around your apartment; it had been a while since the last time he was here, you had changed the wallpaper in the living room, and had put away pictures and other things that reminded you of your ex boyfriend. He noticed you walk out, and looked at you, with bright eyes, “you redecorated.”

“I had to,” you shrug, before walking into your kitchen and motioning him to come with you, and he follows you like a lost puppy, hopping up onto a counter top where you start to clean his nose up, and look at it. “You really shouldn’t have done anything, Mark.” 

“I had to,” he mocks your tone from before, and he flinches a little as you apply antiseptic whilst cleaning.

“No, no you didn’t.” Examining his nose, you let out a sigh of relief, “it’s not broken, you probably just hit it against your hands when you feel which is why there’s a lot of blood.” You turn to your sink, running some hot water to clean your hands and to scrub away the dried blood.

Mark rests his head on your shoulder, he was only a couple inches taller than you, and this position was always comforting to you. There’s silence, but it’s not awkward, and you can’t feel it, as his hands wrap around you and hug you from behind. 

And then, you turn your head, to speak to him but you don’t, instead everything somewhat goes in slow motion as he presses his lips on yours, and you almost freeze, not knowing what to do but something inside you tells you to kiss him back, so you do. 

That kiss was something you didn’t acknowledge for the weeks that passed, you couldn’t even comprehend why you did it - why you let him kiss you - it wasn’t what you would normally do. You basically broke the entire friendship code. You distanced yourself from him, hoping to make everything less awkward and sure it worked but it didn’t help you. Did you like him? Did he like you? Why did things have to be so complicated.

You were sat on your couch, hand in a bowl of popcorn, a rerun of Grey’s Anatomy playing on your TV, as the buzzer next to your door started to beep. You shuffled over to it, clicking the button to answer it, “hello?”

“Y/N, it’s me.” Mark’s voice ran through the speaker system and you gulped, saying nothing for a moment. “You literally just said hello, don’t act like you can’t hear me.”

Again, you say nothing, and you could hear him slam his fist on the door outside the apartment building. Your nails tap against the system, and you click a button, opening the door for him. “Door’s unlocked.” You tell him, and walk back over to your couch. 

The minutes that pass feel like like a lifetime until he finally opens your door, and takes his jacket off, hanging it up next to your own. “You’re not nearly as smart as you think,” he says and you turn to him, standing up, pulling down your t shirt, hiding your small bird tattoos on your hipbones.

“Excuse me?” 

“You’ve been avoiding me! Why?”

You hesitate, and shake your head, “you kissed me.”

He rolls his eyes, “is that was this is about? Jesus, Y/N.” Mark steps closer to you, a smirk on his face, as he runs his fingers down your cheek, and grabs your jaw making you look at him. “You liked it.”

You move your head away, and shake it, “No, I didn’t. We’re just friends.” 

“You wanna bet?” 

With your top teeth sinking into your bottom lip, you didn’t notice that he re grabbed your jaw and then it a split second he kisses you. This time, unlike the first time you kissed, this was full of lust and anger. It was heated as you let him kiss you, kissing him back. The kiss becomes more sloppy and eventually it turns into a makeout session, and your back is pressed against a wall, your hands now being held above your head by him. He pulls away from the kiss, using his free hand to trace your neck, and collarbones, before he grabs the bottom of your shirt. 

“This is coming off.” You nod your head, agreeing with him, you don’t know what happened but now you were crumbling under his touch, a weak mess. Your shirt was quickly removed, and the draft from a window hit your bare chest, “you’re so beautiful.” Mark mumbles, placing small kisses against your neck as he makes sure your hands are still above your head. You let out a whine as he moves down, kissing the top of your left breast. 

He lets your arms go, and then drags his hands down your sides, before pushing down your baggy, pyjama  pants, they pool around your ankles, leaving you in a pair of white, lace panties, and Mark smirks even wider. He grabs the backs of your thighs and picks you up, before kissing you again. Your wrap your legs around him, your hands grabbing at his hair. 

You knew this was now going to truly, fuck up your friendship, but frankly you were needy and here Mark was, giving you attention. 

He pushes you onto your bed, and he pulls his own shirt off and then his pants, before taking in the sigh of you. “I’ve been wanting to see you like this, like a whiny mess, since I first met you.” It made you mentally moan, and wonder how many times he thought of you then. He leans over you, pressing his thumb to your bottom lip, “are you going to be a good girl for me, sweetheart?” 

You nod your head, letting him press his thumb into your mouth and you swirl your tongue over it. “Good because bad girls get punished.” With you whimpering, Mark trails his now wet thumb, down your body, grabbing onto your hips. “I didn’t even know you had these,” he mumbles, kissing the black and red skin of your tattooed hips. 

“I’ve had them since high school,” you answer, before letting a yelp leave your mouth as his teeth bite into the skin, leaving a mark in the spot. 

He moves back up, looking into your eyes as he runs his thumb down your cheek, before squeezing them together, your lips pursing out, “don’t talk, sweetheart, unless I tell you to. Got it?” The look in his eyes makes your knees shake, and he just laughs, kissing you softly, and then moves his left hand down, running his fingers over your clothed heat. 

Mark moves away for a second, and ushers his fingers at you, telling you to come towards him. “Knees.” He demands, and you oblige, kneeling at the edge of your bed, while you wait for him. Your eyes locked on him as he pulls his boxers down, his length already hardening, and he steps forward. 

A hand runs through your hair as you open your mouth, sticking your tongue out and licking a stripe along the side, before you take his head into your mouth. The moment your lips close around him, Mark lets out a low groan, “be a good girl,” he practically begs. As you start to bob your head up and down, you feel his hands tighten in your hair, pulling it all back into a ponytail. 

The feeling of you around him, makes Mark lose practically everything, as he pushes his hips towards you, causing you to gag as you feel his tip hit the back of your throat. 

Without a warning, he pushes you off of him, and turns your body around, pushing your face into your covers, “I hope you’re ready for me.” He says, placing multiple kisses into your shoulder blades, his hands grab your panties and pull them down your thighs, letting his fingers tease your opening. He gathers your wetness onto his fingers, before pushing his cock into you, his damp fingers pressing against your clit. 

“Oh -” you moan out, digging your fingers into the white silk, as his left hand grabs your hips. And boy, he grabs them harshly. You’ll have bruises tomorrow, but as long as your neck or chest wasn’t marked, you were okay with it. Blue and black splotches in the areas where only the pair of you would know that they laid there, felt so much more intimate than regular hickies. 

~His pace is harsh, and fast, and you don’t exactly hate it. “Fuck you feel so good.”

The room is filled with your silence, well just your moans and heavy breathing, and his dirty tone. You never would’ve expected Mark Lee to have a tongue such like that. He raises his hand, and slams it down on the right side of your ass, and you yell - out of pain and pleasure. The sound of skin against skin, makes your ears tingle. 

“I’m not gonna last much longer, fuck.”

Fingers pressed against your clit, moving around, you exhale a sharp breath. “Me either,” you whimper, hoping he doesn’t do anything for you speaking. However, Mark just leans himself forward, and bites onto your earlobe.

“Come on, babygirl, cum for me.”

The feeling deep in the pit of your stomach fills you up, as your eyes shut tightly, and within seconds; your hitting your orgasm. Your walls tightening trigger Mark, and not even a minute later, he’s filling you up. Moaning out profanities, his hands are still tight against your hips. 

You both stay in that position for a few moments, before he pulls out and turns you around, kissing you once more. “Just friends, huh?”

You roll your eyes, “shut up.”

[nctaezen]

I knew it, brb am going to throw my phone out to space (it feels like it is happening more? I swear I thought it got fixed but nope and I heard of that glitch you are having! Alas not sure what to fix it as I cannot be sure myself but I hope it got fixed?)

Omg you did!?! How come I never saw your lil Easter egg under glitch mode sets!? I am a bad buddy for not noticing that jdjsdkdk but I do giggle we have glitch mode as a song. Someone from sm is a fan of our lil friendship xD jk! Now we have beatbox and I lean more into glitch mode personally? Both are good songs and fun ones but based on my listens, glitch mode is more. I did see a mutual make a hsm and beatbox gifset which makes me giggle because it very much is high school musical and I love it! A very well put album i agree, im trying to catch up because so many of my favs had comebacks and ontop of that I am a fan of a new group so I am all over with content lol (that and other things which I will get into a bit later)

Oof see life wasn't the easiest for you, I hope things are better now!! I hope thy job is good, shame its a far distance but I hope you can like manage through it, remember slap people with fishes if needed! Also you mentioned a special someone? Pray tell hehehe *pulls up tea and chair* as for life over here its alright! Granted for me life sort of flipped upside down a month ago since I have lost a parent so it hasn't been sunshine and rainbows rn in many ways but I don't want to just throw all of that onto here to also be respectful to your followers! Im trying of course, I have better days than some! I guess one positive news is I have started making gifs myself!! Granted I don't make alot of gifs for nct but I am happy of what I make! Nowhere near your level of awesome gifs, no one can get to your level (alexa play next level) I think thats it? Sorry for not really sharing some fun stuff like usual but I do feel comfy telling ya this update and such. I really do hope you are happy and are much better than me! Sending you a big hug and I hope you can feel my hug! I loves youuu!

Hey my dear glitch friend! I bet you didn't expect my sudden reply, but as I told you, things would get chaotic with my new office location and today I could finally get some rest.

My birthday gave me the right to get 2 days of rest from work today and tomorrow, thank goodness I was waiting for this day to come so fast! Not because it's my anniversary but because I really wanted to rest soooo badly! I worked so much this week and spending extra 3 hours per day stuck in traffic is the worst thing to me.. Thank goodness I convinced my boss to spend the rest of the week WFH.

Whoever came up with Glitch Mode, we surely sent some telepathic vibes of our friendship! You always come on my mind when it randomly comes out on my playlist.

More things happened since our last time we talked and NCT 127 anniversary made me feel a bit mushy, especially with Taeyong's messages, there was a lot to reflect and relate. Also it brought me back to 7th July 2019, when I saw them perform for the first time and we also spent their 3rd anniversary together in London. It was a beautiful happy memory but unfortunately..2019 ended up tragically for me, despite all the beautiful memories I collected through that year.

Because I can feel what you're going through, it was the same year my dad left us as well and it wasn't easy to get over it. Even these days I do think of the images I have stuck in my memory (it was a long fight and it didn't end up peacefully). I know I never openly talked about it here, because I would not stop crying once I would start writing my life story. I've seen lots of friends and people I follow here being more open about these things but I am the type to keep it for myself for a long time. Well I guess now that you talked about your hardships, you gave me the courage to open up myself.

I think the only one who can actually heal us is only ourselves and time. I couldn't find much comfort in other people's words and I know you must feel the same. On another note I wanted to encourage you to focus on things you love the most and hey! someone is debuting into cc's world! I think you'll catch up fast. When I look at my past creations, nothing looked pretty since the beginning, but I tried my best to satisfy myself until I could see positive reactions from other people as well. And it's sure, giffing was a huge source of self-healing for me. And I'm very thankful of thinking of my gifs as being the "next level" haha It already played on my head while I was writing it.

Once again I'm happy you felt comfortable enough to share your story with me. I will be around here for the next days, in the hopes we will get some pretty content soon to share. Sending you a big warm hug and lots of love ♡♡♡ Stay safe, don't skip your meals and keep hydrating yourself

[beaglelinefics]

First Dates and Hospital Trips

NCT X Platonic Reader (Gender Neutral), Jaehyun X Reader

Writer: Jaime

Previous Parts: Netflix and Chill, Blanket Burrito, Stormy Weather, Alternate Coffee Universe, The Unpleasantly Pleasant

Masterlist

            “Mork!”

            The poor boy flailed as you ran up to him and slung an arm over his shoulder. He had been leaving his class when you saw him across the quad, and you needed him for something. Something very important.

            “Uh, hey, Y/N. What’s up?”

            “So you’re friends with Donghyuck, right?”

            “Yeah…”

            “And he’s friends with Jaehyun, right?”

            “Oh my god, Y/N, I’m not putting in a good word for you.”

            “Oh come on! I trust you so much more than Ten!”

            “Y/N, I love you, but I’m not getting involved. Setting people up makes me uncomfortable,” he whined. “I think it’s trauma from when Jaemin almost got killed.”

            “See, I think that’s the reason Yuta doesn’t talk to me anymore.”

            “You know he’s also friends with Jaehyun, right?”

            “Are you serious? Great! Now my chances with him went down again!”

            “Wait, you had a chance with him?”

            “How dare—yes I did!” You took out your phone and proudly showed him the contact for Jaehyun. “He said he liked me too! And gave me his number!”

            “Oh, wow, look at that.” He leaned closer to properly look at it. “Hey, do you mind if I just,” he snatched the phone from your hand and sprinted away from you, “borrow this! I’ll see you later!”

            “Wait just a—Mark! Mark Lee! You get back here!” The entire quad turned to look at you two as you gave chase, breathing heavily as you attempted to catch up. “I knew it! I knew you were working for Ten! Your innocence is a façade!”

            “I’m sorry, Y/N! He promised me ten bucks!”

            “You cheap hoe!”

            “A man’s gotta pay for pizza somehow!”

            “You, sir, are no man!” You skidded to a halt and leaned against a tree to give your screaming legs a rest and try to catch your breath. “I can’t believe you would betray me like this, Mork! I thought we were bros!”

            “Dominos before bros!” he called over his shoulder before rounding the corner.

            That bitch was disowned.

            “Taeil!”

            “Oh boy.”

            “Oh boy is correct, sir.” You slammed your hand on the table and glared at him. “What do you know?”

            “Me? I don’t know anything,” he insisted as he tried to maintain an innocent expression. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

            “Bullshit.” You smiled at the boy sitting beside your friend. “Hello, Taeyong, you look lovely today. I’m sorry you have to bear witness to this mess.”

            “Uh, yeah, no, it’s cool.”

            “Now, Taeil, spill. I know Ten put you up to something. If he put Mark up to something, he most definitely put you up to something. I want to know what.”

            “Y/N, I’m telling you, Ten didn’t put me up to something. I mean, you know what happened last time! I don’t want one of the little ones to almost die!”

            You narrowed your eyes at him and motioned that you were watching him. You slowly took out a chair and lowered yourself onto it. “You listen here, sir, I’m watching you. I am going to be stuck to you like a nasty ass piece of chewed gum on Doyoung’s shoe. You can’t do anything, got it?”

            “Right, okay. Just stay here and waste your time.” He rolled his eyes and focused on his book once more. “Have fun watching me study.”

            “You know what? I will.” You took out your own textbook and notebook and set them out on the table in front of you. “Taeyong, if you see anything suspicious, tell me. He’s up to something. I know he is.”

            “Um… pretty sure he’s here to study with me, but I’ll keep that in mind.”

            “Thank you. I appreciate that.”

            Taeil smirked at you over his book as you turned to start taking notes on your reading. It looked as though the plan was working perfectly.

            “No, Doyoung, I can’t get ice cream with you because I’m too busy keeping an eye on Taeil,” you snapped into Taeyong’s phone. “Mork stole my phone for Ten, and I’m positive Taeil is in on this as well.”

            You could hear your friend’s heavy sigh. “Y/N, I have a coupon for free ice cream. Are you seriously telling me that you’re going to turn this down?”

            “…I… ugh, as much as it pains me, yes. I am. I am not letting Ten go through with this plan of his, not again. Do you know how much I cried when I had to sit there waiting for Jaemin’s arm to be reset? A lot. I love that child. I don’t want any of the other little ones to suffer that same fate.”

            “I respect and admire that, I really do, but I feel like if Taeil was in on it, he wouldn’t be able to hide it from you. He has all those weird facial features, you know?”

            “You make a good point there.” You studied Taeil’s face for any suspicious activity, but couldn’t find any other than his usual suspicious expression. “Okay, fine, I’ll meet you there. I need to stop by the apartment and change. I think I sweat a lot when I chase Mark.”

            “Solid. I’ll see if I can get your phone back from Mark and Ten.”

            “Doyoung, I freaking love you. I’ll see you later for some free ice cream, alright?”

            “Yessss!”

            You hung up and handed the phone back to Taeyong, giving him a grateful smile. “Thanks for letting me use your phone.”

            “Yeah, no problem. Sorry it got stolen.”

            “Yeah… the child has been disowned.”

            “Pfft, there’s no way you could possibly disown that boy,” Taeil snorted. “You love Mark.”

            “That was before he betrayed me in this way. Ten dollars. That’s how little it took for him to turn against me.” You looked off in the distance as Mark’s last words haunted you. Dominos before bros… was that really what your love had come to? “Anyways, I gotta go. Free ice cream is calling my name.”

            “Yeah, have fun with the bunny.”

            “I will, thank you. Have fun studying.”

            You guys bumped fists and waved before you were heading off to your apartment to change. Taeil turned to grin at Taeyong.

            “Honestly this is thirty bucks well earned,” he told his friend.

            “You’re still taking me out to eat, right? I don’t like lying to Y/N. We have history.”

            “Right, the history of you two bonding over the mutual embarrassment of you roommates?”

            “Yeah. We’re kindred souls.”

            “Yeah, Taeyong, I’m still taking you out to eat.”

            “Good. Then I don’t really feel guilty about lying.”

            “Oh, look, it’s Satan,” you announce in distaste when you see Ten lounging on your couch. “What are you up to, demon?”

            “Me? Just chillin’. Mark’s gone to get some pizza.”

            “You should be ashamed of yourself. Using a child like that for your own gain.”

            “Maybe I should, but I don’t.” He tossed you your phone and grinned. “I had a great time scrolling through your messages. Who knew someone as bitter as you could seem sweet when texting Jaehyun?”

            “Learned from the best. Anyways, I’m meeting Doyoung for free ice cream.”

            “Sounds fun.”

            “Yeah, it would be, if I didn’t have to change. My shirt is still damp from when I ran after Mark because he stole my phone under your influence.” You sniffed and walked past him with your head turned firmly in the other direction. “It really is the sweet ones who are most at risk from the temptation of the devil.”

            “Um, rude.”

            “You totally deserved it,” you muttered before shutting the door to your room. “Now let’s see what your slimy hands did with my phone.”

            You frantically scrolled through all your texts and social media to see if he had written anything odd or embarrassing, but it seemed clean. Too clean. You knew he was up to something. Ten was never satisfied by simply reading messages. He was a monster of chaos. He had to have done something. WHAT HAD THAT DEMON DONE? Your panic was rising as you still couldn’t find anything wrong, but you didn’t have time for this! Doyoung texted you the details and sent you a picture showing how he was not up for you being late. That kid… so impatient. So you quickly changed to look more presentable and ran back out, landing a satisfying smack on the back of Ten’s head.

            “I’m going to find out what you did,” you told him confidently.

            “Oh, I have no doubt,” he replied with a smirk. “Good luck to you, sweetheart.”

            “Gross.”

            “Oh hell no.”

            You had arrived at the ice cream place to see no sign of Doyoung. You immediately knew something was up. He would never stand you up like this if free ice cream was involved, so what was really going on here? You got your answer when you saw Jaehyun crossing the street to enter the same ice cream parlor you were currently fuming inside. Those dicks! They were all in on it! All of them! Including sweet Taeyong. You’d trusted him. You’d trusted him, and this was how he repaid that trust.

            “Hey, Y/N,” Jaehyun greeted with a warm smile. “I’m glad you texted me. I was actually getting kind of worried considering I hadn’t heard from you for a few days. I was afraid you’d gone back to avoiding me.”

            “Haha, right. I texted you. I texted you to invite you for ice cream?”

            “You don’t sound… um, are you okay?”

            “Yeah, totally!” You grabbed his hand and started dragging him to where you ordered. “Let’s get some ice cream! This place is really good!”

            While he pondered over the flavors, you were inwardly freaking out. What was going on? What had happened? What were you supposed to do here? Why had your friends betrayed you like this? You were totally out of your element. The last time you’d been on a date was with Yuta, and that ended with a broken arm and hospital trip. You looked around wildly for any sign of the little ones, but thankfully it seemed like none of them were there. So the good news was that they weren’t in any harm near you, but you had no idea if Ten was going to have them pop up later.

            “Hey, you sure you’re okay?”

            “Hm? Oh, yeah, no totally great! I’ll have uhhh…” You squinted at the flavors and ordered your favorite amongst them. “I’ll pay.”

            “What? No way! I’ve got this, don’t worry.”

            “Jaehyun, I invited you here so I’ll pay.”

            “Alright, if you insist.” He watched as you handed the cashier the money and smiled. “I’m paying next time, though.”

            Next time? You followed him outside to a bench in shocked silence. Next time? He had said next time! Meaning he wanted to do this with you again! Don’t die, don’t die, do not die! You’ve got this. You can do this. Calm down and eat your ice cream. Everything it totally chill. Nothing to worry about here. You’ve got it all under control.

            “You didn’t send that text, did you.”

            You looked up at your date with wide eyes. “Um… yeah, no. I didn’t. Mark stole my phone, and I’m betting Ten texted you. Taeil and Taeyong kept me busy while Doyoung invited me for free ice cream. I have no idea what Johnny’s part is in all of this, but I know he’s involved.”

            “Wow… your friends are dedicated.” He laughed and shook his head. “They even got Taeyong involved.”

            “You’re not… mad, are you?”

            “You kidding? Whether or not you sent the text, I still got a date with you. I’d say this is a win for me. What about you? You upset?”

            “I’m upset they did this without telling me,” you grumbled. “But… I’m glad I’m here with you. I just hope this is the end of their meddling.”

            “Why?”

            “Let’s just say they do not have the best track record.”

            “I’d say they’ve learned from it. I mean, this turned out pretty great, right?”

            “Yeah… yeah it did.”

            You both smiled at each other, and your heart raced as you saw those damned dimples. How could one person be this perfect? He leaned in closer, and you felt your eyes start to flutter shut in preparation for what was about to happen. Your lips were almost touching when you heard the crash. Your eyes snapped open, and you looked around for the source of the noise. Please don’t be one of the guys! You zeroed in on the bicycle rider sprawled out on the sidewalk, cradling their arm.

            “Na Jaemin!” you shrieked before running over. “Jaehyun, I’m so sorry, but I’ve got to go. My idiot friends have screwed up yet again.”

            “Do you need any help?” Jaehyun asked worriedly as he saw the angle the kid’s arm was at. “Oh, shit, that’s looks bad.”

            “Just, uh, call Mark and tell him to get everyone to the hospital. I’ve got to get him there now.” You gave him an apologetic look. “I’m really sorry about this.”

            “Hey, don’t worry about it. Just, uh, tell me if he’s okay, and I’ll call you later?”

            “Yeah, absolutely.” You helped Jaemin up and gave him a very disapproving look as you dusted him off. “Jaemin, I thought we agreed you would just say no whenever Ten asked you to do something.”

            “But I wanted to help!” he complained through his tears. “He said riding the bike was much safer than the float!”

            “Oh my god I’m going to kill him.”

            “Johnny Seo!”

            The tall figure winced when he heard the shrill tone of your voice. All the guys winced as they followed him into the hospital waiting room. You looked furious.

            “What did I say?” you asked them as they came to a stop in front of you. “What did I say? Hm?”

            “To not set you up,” Ten mumbled.

            “Wow, look at that! You remembered! So tell me, why did you do it? If you remembered what I said, why did you do it?”

            “We just wanted to help,” Mark said softly.

            “I know…” You took a deep breath and rubbed at the crease between your eyebrows. “I know that, okay? And I appreciate it. But I told you not to get involved because I knew something like this would happen!”

            “I honestly thought he’d be okay riding the bike,” Ten offered.

            “Well obviously he wasn’t!” you snapped. “He broke his arm again, and now Jaehyun is going to pull a Yuta and never want to go on a date with me again. So thanks.”

            “I wouldn’t say that,” Taeil told you.

            “Oh really? You wouldn’t?”

            “He actually said he was afraid you wouldn’t want to go on another date because of what happened with Jaemin.”

            “Well if you pull this again, maybe I don’t!”

            “Look, we’re sorry, okay?”

            “No, Johnny, not okay!” You stepped forward to smack his chest angrily. “Jaemin is in the hospital again with a broken arm again because you guys got involved again.”

            “We won’t do it again, Y/N,” he promised. “We’ll stay out of the way. And Ten will never plan for Jaemin on a vehicle ever again, isn’t that right?”

            “…Yeah. That was my bad.”

            “You guys are idiots,” you muttered. “But… damn it, you’re my only friends so I can’t stay mad at you forever.”

            “That’s the spirit!”

            After a nice group hug, you all were finally allowed to see Jaemin, and that boy was still smiling. How did he do that? You rushed forward to wrap your arms around the child and squeezed as tight as you could without hurting him even more.

            “You are so stupid! So stupid!” you scolded him. “Never, ever do that again!”

            “Hey, I just wanted to help!” He looked at the others with bright eyes. “Did it work?”

            “Totally worked,” Ten assured him. “Although your crash broke up their kiss.”

            “How the hell—okay, you know what? It doesn’t even surprise me anymore that you guys stalked my date.” You shook your head before pressing a kiss into Jaemin’s hair. “You’ve really got to stop doing stupid stuff, bro. How am I going to explain to Mom and Dad that you broke your arm again?”

            “Um… Jeno dared me to do a wheelie?”

            “..That’ll have to do.”

            He grinned up at you before high-fiving the other guys. Seriously, your little brother was an idiot, but at least he wasn’t dead. The bike really was safer than the float considering he didn’t almost get run over again. Why were you friends with this group of idiots again? Oh, that’s right, they were the only friends you had. Mark better buy you some pizza, and Doyoung better take you for actual free ice cream, or you would actually disown them. Idiots…

[cherrydobunny]

Only For You - 🌙 Taeil

Group: NCT

Genre: Fluff? Romance? idk.. o.O

Word Count: 1,900+

A/N🍁: This is my first ever fan fiction so I hope you guys like it! Also please show our Moon 🌙 more love he deserves everything and more! 

_________________

It was a perfect summer evening, the skies were kissed in candy pink and the slight breeze was pure bliss to the heat you had to endure throughout the day. As the last few exams left of the year were coming up next week you were stuck again at the library studying, luckily for you the library had opened up their doors that led to the main campus courtyard.  Which is why you were sat on top of a miniature hill studying looking out in-between the space of two college buildings trying to savour the moment of the beautiful sunset. You were waiting for your close friend Taeil to finish with his study group for the group project he was currently working on.  After about an hour the time read 19:25 on your watch as you closed your books calling it a day.   You laid back on the grass closing your eyes enjoying the sound of nature and the breeze on your skin.  You heard the footsteps of people going by until one pair stopped next to you. "You know it isn't safe to make yourself vulnerable of your surroundings" "Hello to you too ~" You replied in a cheerful manner as you recognised the voice. You opened your eyes to see Taeil towering above you as he looked down at you.  He's normal dark hair and bangs swept back away from his face revealing his forehead  making him look incredibly attractive(more than normal anyway). You sat up as he sat down beside you. "How long have you been waiting?" Taeil asked worried. "Not that long, don't worry" You reassured. "We went a bit over as we couldn't agree on the preparation of shrimp, and we had to write up our instructions on the prep and reasons why before leaving." "I'm guessing it was on whether to have the tail or no tail" "Of course it was!" "Why didn't you flip a coin, Taeil?" You snickered. "Haha I'm glad you're having fun. It's so annoying though why do we have to all have the same answers when the point of the course is to find our own individual flare." "Hey you're a great cook! So don't worry too much about this, anyway next year you get a chance to intern at an actual restaurant and show your skills" "I guess you're right" "Of course I am!" You nudged him with a cheeky grin as he smiled down at you. "When did you put your hair down?" "Half-way through studying, I know it's messy but it was frustrating me" "No you look great, I told you to let it down more often" "oh, thanks. I'll let it down as often as you let your forehead breathe" "Only for you then" Taeil winked. Your heart stopped for a second but you still replied with "Only for you" which came out as more of a whisper than you had wished. You and Taeil have been really close friends for around three years now.  You met through mutual friends in freshman year of college and grew closer and closer over the years sharing the same interests and hobbies.  When you first met him you just thought of him as a genuine nice guy who was blessed with good looks. But at some point last year you realised you were totally head over heels for him and there was no return button.  From then on everything changed on how you took his kindness.  You had to control your crazy heart when he was around so you didn't make it obvious. Especially when you made eye contact, or he showed you that illuminating smile. So now as you looked up at him, staring down at you with a look you can only describe as warmth and home, your hands began to get clammy from nervousness and your heart started its sprint.  You both stared into each other's eyes for longer than normal in a comfortable silence. And you could've sworn his eyes were darting down to your lips like yours were to his. The both of you started to lean in,  when a car honked in the distance near the campus car park which startled you both away from one another.  This wasn't the first time this sort of moment has happened between you both; it happened for the first time around last year when you were both laying down on your bedroom floor talking about random things until questions of crushes came into place and you told him there was someone you liked and when Taeil asked you who it was all you told him was that it was the person most precious to you.  You were convinced that you had given it away then but either Taeil didn't want to ruin the moment or wanted you to confess in a better way or maybe he was embarrassed to think of it as it being him.  Matter of fact it can't be anyone else but him.  If you hadn't had a near kiss moment at that time like right now, you would've been convinced he didn't like you that way at all.  But since then you've had a lot of those moments as well as the staring at each other for longer than necessary.  You had also asked if he was interested in anyone in a teasing manner but he had only replied with being scared of confessing and mumbling about not wanting to risk a great friendship.  You had decided not to press him on further.  If he did like someone else then he would tell you.  However, with these frequent near kiss moments happening you knew he reciprocated your feelings for him and that you both had kind of made a silent mutual agreement to let it happen naturally.   "Come on let's go" Taeil startled you out of your trance as you realised he had taken your backpack and books and was offering his hand to help you up. "Okay" You placed your hand in his warm one. "Where are your things?" You asked realising he didn't have a bag with him. "Only had my textbooks and notepad, and they're in my locker. I need them tomorrow again." "Let me just take my books to my locker, hold on one second" You grabbed your books from Taeil's hands as you lightly jogged to the lockers on your right hand side and back again. "I can take my bag also, Taeil" You tried retrieving your bag but Taeil wasn't having it. "What kind of gentleman would I be, If I didn't carry it for you plus it's not heavy" "But you were cooking for majority of the day which means your arms and shoulders would be hurting, let me carry it. C'monn" You whined. "No way, now let's go home" Taeil grabbed your hands to stop you from reaching for the bag again and spun you around. You both made your way over to your shared apartment which was about a 15 minutes walk from campus. You had decided to rent an apartment together as it saved you both a lot of money rather than taking university accommodation.  You or Taeil usually always had other friends round but since summer vacations had already started for majority of students, your other friends had already left.  Meaning this was the first time you and Taeil were home alone for movie night this year.  As you slowed down your step a bit to watch Taeil walk ahead of you, you were excited and nervous of this rare opportunity to spend an evening completely by yourselves even if it was as friends. _________________ When you had played rock, paper and scissors on who gets to choose the movie you didn't expect to get more than one surprise. The first being Taeil winning, as he almost never wins against you. The second being he picked a romance film. And finally the third being the fact he was knocked out ten minutes into the film and had gradually leaned more and more into you that now his head was on your lap as you contemplated on what to do.  He must've been really really tired to fall asleep this early as he usually does all nighters with no problem.  To say you weren't a little disappointed would be a lie as you really looked forward to spending time with him.  He looked so peaceful as you traced his facial features with your fingertips.  You know in movies this is the part where you're meant to kiss him whilst he sleeps but you couldn't break that kind of personal boundary, even if all you've been thinking about for the past year is kissing him.  You gently removed his head from your lap as you went to get a pillow and blanket for him.  Once you had placed the pillow under his head and covered him you sat on the floor in front of where he laid on the sofa just about midway so that he still had access to the T.V. if he does wake up. It was nearly 1am when the movie was in its last quarter, when you felt arms wrap around your shoulders in an awkward back hug as Taeil slid onto the floor beside you. "I'm so sorry, you should've woken me." "Hey for you to fall asleep that early you must've been super tired" "Thank you for the pillow and cover, but I really wished you had woken me up" Taeil pouted at you as his arms hugged your waist closer to him. You placed your hands over his arms as your heart did somersaults, he had never been this touchy with you before. You now stared at him the movie forgotten, "Why?" You questioned him. "I really wanted to spend the whole evening with you" "You did I was by you the whole time" "Nooo" Taeil pulled you more, practically picking you up and now you were on his lap, the sudden movement surprised you that you held onto his neck. "I wanted it to be special for both of us, this is a rare occasion for us to be alone you know" With each word his face got closer and closer. Your foreheads now touching and heavy breathing you managed to breathe out a reply. "I know" You caught your breath a bit before continuing "Since you're here it's already special to me." "Do you know how much you mean to me" He hugged you closer if that was possible. "As much as you mean to me" You replied as you moved one of your hands to cup his cheek.   "Why didn't we do this earlier?" Taeil questioned, one of his hands going into your hair. "Do what?" "This." Taeil captured your lips with his in an overwhelming kiss that had you feeling warm and fuzzy from head to toe. You kissed him back with as much love and passion as you could as your senses went wild.  You used your hands on his neck and hair to pull him closer as his hand on your waist tightened and the other in your hair moved in a way which felt like a massage.  Everything felt heavenly.  Once you parted you were pretty sure you were both equally blushing messes with swollen lips.  You just stared at each other smiling like fools. "Sorry you missed the ending of the story" Taeil said as he kissed your cheek. You smiled up at him as you wrapped your arms around his waist.  "It's okay I like the beginning of this one better."  

A🍁

[snap-spark-blog]

In regards to nct’s art, marketing, reality

This is a post loosely about NCT’s

artistic vision

modus operandi

marketing strategy

and me trying to (invite conversation and) define the line of reality within what is the “NCT” that I love, and to understand to the best of my abilities why it is I love it

All these thoughts came from the cherry bomb showcase. I think, now, in the aftermath of promotions would be a rly good time to write about it.

Below are my own observations and opinions! It gets quite long but I hope you stay with me throughout and leave your thoughts too afterwards!!

The incident

I was watching the cherry bomb showcase for the first time (it turned out very different from my expectations) and it was going unbelievably well until this part during the interview-performance intermission gave me a jolt.

The MC, Eana Kim, is a well-known lyricist for the industry. I was grateful that throughout the interview she continued to ask NCT about their process of artistic creation, about the visual, audio, and conceptual aspects of their Cherry Bomb album, which is indisputably a collective work of art assembled by many creators on and off stage. She pinpointed some phrases from the lyrics of individual songs, and pinpointed Taeyong as a writer for his observational skills, which I found super impressive--although not surprising given her experience. When the song talk finished, NCT went backstage to get ready, and here she is left on the stage to “entertain the fans”, and begins speaking (with little fan interruption) what is essentially a very gentle monologue after a comment about the fan energy:

And here’s the thing: in this brief minute or two, Eana Kim basically analyzed my entire experience as an NCT fan, especially highlighting very sensitive details that aren’t something I see people easily identifying as common about this fandom. Of what she said, here are the points I strongly agree with:

1. I feel that NCT are very different from other idols, music wise, group dynamic wise, and also in their connection to their music, the honesty in their music as representative of themselves, the artists

2. I think they are special, rather than something common

3. As a consumer and fan, I am strongly attracted to something high quality, well made, and perfectionist (I also strongly believe this is a trend for many SM Ent fans, some obsession with pefection which SM always delivers)

4. I will be upset if NCT doesn’t do well in the industry 

5. I believe NCT will produce many things with great quality because they are very talented artistically

6. And that given the niche status of their group within the current circumstances of the industry, I have become aware that I will have to play an especially large part in promoting NCT’s contents 

7. I feel especially that being in this fandom, I am blessed with more reciprocity from my idols than I normally expect (in a sense, the lack of some distance which I’m used to there being, a barrier)

Why does this matter?

Everything fans come to naturally synthesize about their own fan experience and understand about their own attractions starts to sound different when they’re acknowledged by an official party. On one hand, I’m elated to think that a very respectable, experienced, and observant MC from within the industry has noted the same things about NCT that I have, and that she too thinks they are quite special, and it somewhat validates my observations. On the other, it leaves me with the urge to wonder how much of this short and concise speech is a fantastic summary of the group (during their showcase, an appropriate time to showcase their essence) and how much of it is conveniently too spot-on to be spontaneous.

I personally think it’s difficult and risky to be a fan of the industry if you’re not constantly conscious of “intention”. Especially fans of large companies, if you want to maintain liberty over your own freedom as a critical consumer without being easily sucked into “entertainment”, these are things you have to question. 

What is SM’s intention, with NCT?

To me, SM is a company with especially clear vision at all times, and enacts tight control around their vision. This often results in executing plans to force certain results. They might not always do the right things, and things might not always go as they plan, but as a principle, before doing anything, they know what they’re doing. They know what they want, what they need to achieve it, and can subsequently plan out how to achieve it. 

The make-up of NCT is not a coincidence--to me, what I feel SM wants to achieve with NCT is more or less this:

1. Create a truly international super group, drawing on and adding to the growing power of hallyu overseas

2. Experiment with new styles of music and group structure, in order to challenge, advance, and redefine k-pop

3. Strive for higher artistic excellence and create art that is more emotionally connected than ever seen before within their own production powers

And all three of these points SM Ent expects, when executed correctly, to tackle an untapped market and prove uniquely profitable to the company, whether this will be gained in the form of money, fame, power, or even pure artistic elation. 

What was the speech’s intention?

What Eana Kim said about NCT feels basically like a sweetened, humanized version of these selling points of NCT crucial to SM’s vision. The showcase is broadcasted on vlive, which eventually did receive translations for many languages, giving international access to this information. The showcase itself has substance, and delves in a critical way into the visual design of the album, lyric writing and concept ideation, into each and every song from the perspective of the members who explain their own experiences with the song and music making (rather than break down the technical composition of it in a memorized speech).

This touches on all 3 of the main points I derived. They are coming at us with new music, and they are presenting it to us in a new and different way which is more honest. There is no aegyo being shown on stage--instead there are questions like “what were you thinking about when you made this conscious, formal, artistic decision?” And it’s not hard to see SM is trying to alert the world of these differences: they are doing interviews in all languages, they are filming NCT life in all these places, and every time I see a comment that goes “I’m surprised to see NCT at KCON I thought they only did SM concerts” I think yes, you are right that not many other SM groups go so far abroad and that yes it is intentional! But the last crucial message that Eana Kim’s speech pointed out, something I thought I came to decide on my own, is that NCT actually needs fans to give back and reciprocate to continue. 

To me, SM took a deep financial risk deciding to market NCT this way. They have the means to, of course, and they are probably the only company that has the means to, but they didn’t have to. And they certainly didn’t have to continue when it didn’t seem to be immediately paying off. 

There is something about this that I respect: no one expects it of SM to change and progress, and they don’t expect anyone to easily follow. It’s not the best decision, but it means that, in addition to maintaining what is conservatively SM Entertainment’s philosophy, maintaining a degree of their standard of perfection, SM finally wants something real out of their music, and they care about it enough to maintain their artistic integrity in the face of many setbacks so far. Why would they do this, instead of the tried and true? I like to believe that, aside from the continual race for setting new global trends, on the part of the company and its artists, it’s a pure pursuit for a more connected, higher level of art and music. 

And so, for them to take this risk and give us something real, if we can feel the heart of someone speaking to us, we should give back our own share to the experience, to the collective effort of artist and fan, to keep this up, to make meaning, to prove something together.

It would all sound innocent without the last part about fan support, but I’d argue that this isn’t the only thing it’s trying to convey. It’s a fair effort to gently point out some things to the many young fans in the audience (who did listen very quietly to the things she said) that they have indeed become a part of something special, how it is special, and only upon achieving this kind of consciousness can anyone willingly spend their money on NCT and not somewhere else. 

Regarding reality

It shocked me to hear all this from their official comeback showcase because.............honestly I feel played............

I can’t be the only one who feels personally called out by all this “you love perfectionism and art”, and it feels kind of unsafe, like SM is one step ahead again, having analyzed exactly how fans would respond if they marketed a certain way, and that I’m simply doing everything they predicted. Honestly? I respect that, I expect no less--again, SM knows what it’s doing. And I honestly don’t mind spending my money exactly as they want me to, given the sole condition that all these human moments, sparks, connections, the love that is shared for art and music, are not a part of the money equation.

In the end it boils down to the question with no answer. Did NCT come together as something SM planned and wanted, or is it something developed after thorough observations of its artists and perfected into something mutually beneficial to both parties? In other words, which question was asked, between “How do I want them to be represented?” vs “How can I best represent them?” Did SM see a group of friends, good and honest kids and think, maybe we don’t have to change this, maybe it’s their charm? It’s an ambiguous reality. In the end I only want the NCT members I love to be able to be themselves and be truly happy. I’m a little obsessed with reality, and I want that to be real, I want to be able to believe in this world. NCT makes it so easy to want to believe in them, they feel so pure and real. :’(

In conclusion!

Please don’t be alarmed, but please be aware. I honestly think that’s the best way to enjoy any kind of media in this world. Also the showcase is hilarious and pls check it out if you haven’t

The point is that the more SM contributes to a fan’s understanding of their meta role in this system, the more I’m scared reality isn’t as believed. Still, there is nothing I can do but believe and hope for the best!! Eana Kim really did a great job hosting their showcase and promoting what I think are their most important qualities to fans and non-fans, and the cherry bomb comeback has brought so much to the fandom, even I feel making a conscious effort to be more inclusive within their very exclusive style of music. 

Please keep supporting NCT!!! Thank you so much for reading, and I would LOVE any kind of responses I get to this post. I’d rly love to get to know the fandom better!!!!

Ty for your time ♡