#i feel like everyone is judging me like well jackie mayb if u just studied n applied urself.....i do......i stuggle so much with things....
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im not supposed to b on so im just gonna ramble for a bit oki!
#no offense but like so much is going on when in reality nothing is going on#wel firsy of all im just thinking abt my grades? and ...............im rlly sad about it like ill drop them bc whatever i have a B+ in eng#wait ill say percentages i have a 88 in writing#75 in bio and 77 in psych and its so? like damaging jfnejkw idk what other word to use but im just thinking abt it and on the surface i like#to remind myself that ya grades dont define u but deep down it just makes me think abt how worthless n unintelligent i am and how everyone#is doing good so theres no excuse for me and i should just try harder but then the other side of me is bringing myself down to make myself#feel better ill say im stupid n im not smart enough and theres nothing i can change abt it so i wont feel bad abt my grades but who cares#theres still expectations for me and i hav to reach them no matter who i am and im ashamed abt them like i wish i could do better and im so#embarrassed ?? like when my friends r gonna ask me abt it last i check they all had A's ??? idk how to explain..like even talking abt this#i feel like everyone is judging me like well jackie mayb if u just studied n applied urself.....i do......i stuggle so much with things....#now im crying my best is someones average i feel like it takes me forever to grasp concepts n im rlly irritated rn anyways i hate every1#also my second thing is college life in general i feel so alone and lately so many people hav been rude to me for no reason n its rlly#impacting my mood n how i feel abt the school n its not like being home would make any difference my only friend is jennifer but i never see#her so......... she means more than i mean to her so lemme just go cry for the rest of the night :)
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