#i f**king HATE suvs now

[blundergato]

i have 2 cars, one a new 2022 subaru and the other a 2001 honda accord. the honda i bought for dirt cheap because i wanted to practice driving a manual transmission car.

what ive noticed in driving both cars is that older cars generally have MUCH better visibility...like all around. in my honda, i get in the seat and i have an incredibly clear view of the front and rear. the windows feel huge on all sides. the front of the car sits low which makes the visibility even better.

in my modern subaru, the visibility is much worse, especially from the back. i assume that the prevalence of cameras on the back of modern cars is to remedy how visibility has gotten much worse in general.

im sure that the way modern cars are built makes them safer in general than my older car, although my subaru is just a regular ass sedan. with the extreme prevalence of giant ass pick-up trucks and the increasing size of SUVs nowadays, it's honestly prolly not that much safer than my older car. if i get hit by one of these stupid ass ford f150s and/or most suvs nowadays, its probably not gonna be good.

i just think its interesting how cars have changed and...kinda gotten worse in the past 20 years in some ways.

[twstgarden]

❁ ❝ 𝗳𝗼𝗼𝗱 𝘁𝗿𝗶𝗽 ❞

━ third years and magicless! fae! gn! reader  ━ living as a magicless fae has its ups and down, but you will never regret accepting night raven college's invitation to attend their academy. (f/n means first name)

requested by: @king-zi request type: headcanons requester’s message: Hi! I am new to your blog and love your writing, I really liked the Lilia and fae!gender neutral reader as well as yuu driving with the third years! I'm new to the request thing so my apologies for anything that doesn't meet the requirements Request: Can I get a gender neutral reader/yuu who is a magicless fae interacting with the third years? Maybe on a trip or something? Again I love your writing and hope you keep writing as your work is amazing ❤ florist’s note: hello there, welcome to my blog. i'm glad you enjoyed those works of mine. thank you for your request, little one. i hope i did not misunderstand anything. stay safe. <3

do not steal or translate without my permission.

being a magicless faerie has its ups and downs. you have been labelled as the “odd” one in your community as other faeries found it bizarre for you to have no magical abilities. faeries were known to have innate magic and harness their powers from nature itself, making them one of the most powerful magical beings known in twisted wonderland.

but you, dear, are the odd one out.

when you were younger, you’d find this quite a predicament. you hated the very idea of being different from other faeries. you have no magic, so you felt like you never belonged with the fae community, but you had a long life span, so you felt like you never belonged with the human race either.

being a magicless faerie meant you have never expected to study in any magic schools. what’s the use, anyway?

but lo and behold, you have received an invitation from night raven college. before you knew it, here you were in the prestigious academy, attending as a regular student. though, you were not able to participate in magic-based classes, such as practical magic, conjuration, etc. 

at this moment, you found yourself right outside the campus gates with cater and trey standing beside you. cater had his elbow resting on your shoulder while holding a food itinerary, “okay~ so, we’re having a food trip around sage’s island today and we, third years, are the lucky ones to experience this first! we’re visiting around a total of ten restaurants today!”

“ten?” questioned vil in shock as his eyes widened a bit. vil was wearing his outdoor wear while holding the food itinerary, seeing as everyone had their own copies. rook stood beside him with his camera hanging from his neck as he spoke, “oh la la, that’s a lot of places to visit and eat at.”

“it’s great, though. we get to travel around the island and see what they serve in here,” spoke lilia, “wouldn’t that be a good idea in case we want to eat out or something?”

cater nodded in agreement with lilia’s words, “yes! lilia-kun gets it! so, shall we head out?” a series of ‘yea’s and ‘okay’s were heard from the group as leona held onto the car keys, sitting on the driver’s seat of the suv as he started the ignition. he was the driver for this trip, seeing as he was the one who knew how to manoeuvre a vehicle out of these young adults, grandpa, and cat.

you took a seat behind leona with grim on your lap as he grew excited about the trip. “i wanna eat now!” cheered grim as you sighed to yourself. cater was seated on the passenger seat as he turned to look at grim, “don’t worry, grim. you can eat as much as you want on our trip today!” 

“cay-kun, please,” you pleaded, “i’m broke. don’t encourage him.”

“i’ll pay for your meals then,” spoke malleus as he chimed into the conversation with a smile. you and grim looked at him with slightly wide eyes as lilia cooed, “ooh~ someone’s being generous~” 

you smiled politely at malleus and laughed awkwardly, “malleus, it’s really not necessary. i’ll pay for grim’s meals and make sure he won’t buy a lot.” 

“who said i’ll only pay for grim’s meals?” asked malleus with a smile, making leona roll his eyes and produce some barfing noises while driving.

“blegh! gross! stop flirting with them, horned bastard!” exclaimed leona as he shivered in disgust, making cater and trey laugh softly at the scene. idia shrunk in his seat as he sighed to himself, while malleus replied back to leona, “flirting? i’m merely offering to pay for their meals. it’s a gesture of kindness, kingscholar.”

malleus then smirked as he taunted him, “of course, you wouldn’t know that since you’re probably dozing off on the wheel.” leona scoffed at his words and spoke, “if i did fall asleep on the wheel, you’d all be dead.”

he then mumbled, “would be nice, considering your ass is in this vehicle.”

vil sighed at their banter and looked at you, since he was seated beside you, “this is why leona and malleus should never be in the same room, let alone the same vehicle, together. you’ll never hear the end of their fights.”

before the argument could escalate further, cater interrupted their banter, “uhh… there! the barbecue restaurant is up ahead!” leona looked at where cater was pointing and parked the vehicle as he unbuckled his seatbelt.

once everyone was inside the restaurant, the waiter had already gotten their orders as they all sat at a table. you sat beside malleus, but grim took a seat between you two with an excited glint in his eyes. idia was seated in front of you as he had his phone out, taking pictures of grim with a smile on his face.

“once i have my barbecue, it’s going down my stomach!” cheered grim, making malleus chuckle at his words while you patted grim’s head. “If you eat too much here, you won’t get to enjoy the other nine restaurants,” you spoke, almost as if you were scolding him a bit. you then shifted your attention to the ignihyde dorm leader taking pictures of the cat-monster beside you, making you laugh softly, “idia?”

realizing he was caught in the act, he hid his phone and looked at you with wide eyes, “h-huh? i wasn’t doing anything!”

you gave him a teasing smile before waving your hand dismissively, “nah, it’s fine, man. grim can be cute sometimes, anyway.”

“sometimes?” questioned idia with a raised brow, but before you could respond, the food was served and grim was the first one to dig in before anyone else could grab their food.

“goodness, grim. do you not get full?” asked vil in shock and slight annoyance at grim’s behaviour, but the little monster did not care as he replied while munching away, “rarely.”

you gave the rest an apologetic smile before digging in. it was peaceful and fun all the while. lilia was seated on malleus’ left-hand side as he peeked his head towards you, looking at you with a smile, “so, little faerie, how do you like the trip so far?”

you turned to look at lilia while sipping on your drink and teasing him a little, “so far so good, old faerie.” lilia gave you a playfully annoyed expression before laughing it off, seeing as you weren’t wrong anyway. 

all while you were talking to lilia, cater was looking at you with a curious expression until he spoke, “hey, n/n… i hope you won’t take it the wrong way, but what’s it like to live that long?”

though the question seemed vague, you knew he was asking about your experience as a long-lived fae with no magic. you smiled at cater to show him that there isn’t any problem with being curious about that, “hmm… i’d say i feel like an ordinary being with a long life. it’s like you get to experience those moments that are now just seen in history books, you know? it’s quite interesting but lonely.”

“i see…” trailed vil, “...do you ever wish you had magic?”

vil’s question made you think for a while as you hummed softly in thought before smiling at him, “not at all. maybe when i was younger, i would have wished to have magic like everyone else. however, as i grew older, i accepted who i really am. being magicless has its advantages too, y’know!”

“at least i won’t have to worry about overblots,” you mumbled under your breath as you continued to eat your meal.

“we heard that,” remarked leona as he looked at you, making you smile sheepishly at them before returning to your meal. once everyone was finished with theirs, trey grabbed his food itinerary and spoke, “our next stop is… a brasserie.”

“a brasserie? très bien, let’s go, then!” cheered rook as he and the rest stepped out of the barbecue restaurant. 

while you walked back to the suv, you felt a hand on your shoulder as you turned around and saw trey smiling at you. “hey… i thought you might need to hear this. if you ever need someone to lean on, we’re here, okay?” spoke the vice leader politely as he continued smiling at you.

you smiled in response, finding his gesture sweet, “thank you, trey. i appreciate it.”

“for someone long-lived like me, i will never regret attending night raven college. the relationships i’ve cultivated with the third years will always be a special memory that i’ll keep until my last breath.”

© twstgarden 2023 || please do not steal, translate without my permission, or use this to train a.i.

[your-krazy-uncle-bob]

Sean Rima: Biden’s final comments before going home for a nap.

By Sean Rima

August 16, 2019 12:42PM CDT

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You won’t see this on CNN, but these were Joe Biden’s final comments before taking a few weeks off from the campaign trail earlier today. The following transcript was taken from a brief press conference somewhere in Wilmington, Delaware, in the parking lot of an undisclosed Meat City location. The former vice president was responding to a question from an unnamed reporter with WGMD, in Rehoboth Beach.

REPORTER:  “Mr. Biden, you have said that you support slavery reparations. Can you elaborate on your plan for implementing these reparations?”

BIDEN: “Listen, I remember sitting on Air Force One with President Abraham Lincoln. We were friends. We both loved roller derby. I called him Abe, and he called me Joey Boy. That’s how close we were. And I remember him looking me straight in the eye beneath that big, crazy hat of his, and he asks me, he asks, ‘Joey Boy, what do you think about the speech?’ And I says, ‘Abe, that speech is gonna be a big f%*king deal, especially with colored folks in the south and maybe even a few rich gay guys back east.’ He was dumbstruck. He had no words. And that’s when I said, ‘Abe, you have got to put that speech in your hat. And keep it there until we land in Gettysburg.’ And that’s what the president did, because Joey Boy told him to do it. So, listen, man. Don’t lecture me on my civil rights record, you dig? I invented the word reparations. And if you don’t believe me, come at me. No, really. Come at me. See what happens. The last two sounds you’ll hear in this life will be the sound of me hitting you, and then the sound…of you…hitting something. Look, I think I’ve used up all my time here, and the rules matter. I’m gonna go get some shut-eye for a few months. See you in Okinawa! Which were going to win, by the way…”

With that, it is being reported the former vice president then asked one of his handlers for his sippy cup before getting into his black SUV, and driving away. This is satire.

The problem with Joe is simple. The DNC told him he got 80 million plus votes in 2020 and the demented old fool believed them. Now, he not only thinks millions of Americans want what he's dishing out....he thinks they want it BAD. Because he's so gone he cain't tell a fart from a turd he's doubling down on every issue the people hate and he has no ability to ever comprehend it. Unless we can get this senile old bloviator back in his basement, we're doomed.

Good Job democrats.

[drrcbbiins]

look under the cut for those stats my p AL.

BASIC INFORMATION

What is your character’s full name?: Arizona June Robbins ( ew, i hate it. )

How is it pronounced?: air-ih-ZOE-nuh j OO n r AA - b ih n z

Does your character have any nicknames?: Zona, Sedona, Flagstaff, Ari

When and where were they born?: Maryland. Her birthday is November 5th.

What’s their occupation?: She’s a fetal surgeon. 

What gender do they identify themselves as?: Female.

PHYSICAL APPEARANCE

What’s their eye color?: Blue.

Do they wear glasses or contacts?: I mean she’s an old bitch so she has reading glasses but she hardly wears them.

Hair color?: Blonde.

Have they ever dyed their hair or wanted to? Please, she’s old. Of course she’s dyed her hair.

Height? 5′5.

Do they have any birthmarks?: She has one on her thigh.

Do they have any piercings or tattoos?: When she was sixteen she got one of those white tattoos that don’t really show up, and she has her ears pierced. 

If not, do they want to get some?: Not really, my pal.

Do they take an healthy life style?: Eh, she eats at the cafeteria at lot, and out at Joes so?? Not really.

How easy do they get sick?: Not really, she can usually tell before she gets sick.

Any marks on their body ( injuries, … )? A scar from getting her leg cut off, which yikes.

How do they usually dress like?: She’s going to work a lot so she the suit lady, how fANCY. But, if not she usually comfy as heck in sweat pants.

What is their favorite and least favorite feature about themselves?: Her legs not really a feature but, she still struggles with the loss of it from time to time so that’s probably her least favourite, but she likes her own smile a lot u feel. she’s got this super magic smile :~)

PERSONALITY

Positive traits?: Bubbly, Hard working, Determined,  Protective,  Bright, Confident, Badass.

Negative traits?: Flirtatious, Secretive, Explosive, Insecure. 

What do they consider to be the best and the worst on their personality?: Being determined is her best trait. If she wasn’t she’s not quite sure how she could’ve gotten through everything in her life. Though she acts tough on the outside she’s pretty insecure and she actually hates that about herself.

Are they more extroverted or introverted?: extroverted. 

Any talents?: I mean, she’s a pretty badass fetal surgeon so that counts, plus she’s a baby-whisperer. 

What are their fears?: She’s scared to be left, of being alone, and of people judging her. 

Do they have any phobias?: Aerophobia - fear of flying.

What is their soft spot?: smols, she loves them so much, and puppies. Also her SECRET GF AMELIA.

List 3 pet-peeves they can’t stand?: People who are loud as hell on the phone, Being interrupted, Slow Elevators.

EDUCATION

How far did they went in school? Are they still studying?: Arizona got her Degree forever ago, so no she’s not still studying.

Do/Did they like school? What a nerd, okay. She really really loved school.

What type of student are they?: She was one of those dumbasses who would cry over like a b, and always worked super duper hard.

What is/was their favorite subject?: Biology, probably nERD.

And their least favorite?: NO ONE LIKES MATH.

What were they / would they be voted as “most likely to…” in the yearbook?: Mostly likely to succeed, or some lame shit like that.

FAMILY

Who are your character’s parents?: You mean the king and queen Daniel and Barbara Robbins?

How would your character describe them?: Arizona loves both of her parents to death, but she’d definitely describe him as scary. He’d always be the one to take her  down a couple notches and he still doesn’t put up with her stupid ass shit today. Her mom would be described as nosey to her, and she loves her mom to death but she does get in her business a lot more than Arizona would like.

Do they have any siblings?: She has one brother Timothy Robbins. He died in the line of duty.

Are they close with their family?: She was a lot closer to them when things were more simple and when she didn’t have her own family to deal with but, she manages to call them at least once or twice a week.

ROMANCE & SEXUALITY - * you can totally skip for younger characters

What’s their romantic and sexual orientation?: Homosexual and Homoromantic since she was a smol.

Are they seeing anyone right now?: Hahahahah, she’s married for sure.. but, you could say she’s sort of seeing someone too or she was, they just kiss now nbd. :))))

Have they ever been in an relationship?: She sure has, she’s a grown ass lady, so.

Have they ever been in love?: Less than people would expect but, yeah.

How easy to they fall for someone?: Falling for someone is totally different than wanting to sleep with someone and Arizona wants to do the latter more often than not. She’s only truly fallen for like 3 or 4 people in her life time. So not that easily at all.

In their view, why didn’t any past relationships work out?: She doesn’t want to believe it’s her but she doesn’t budge easily. She’s always thinking that what she wants is right and all that shit.

What do they look for in someone?: Someone hilarious, and someone who’s a little full of themselves, and believes in themselves. Also someone who will accept her for everything she’s done but not put up with her shit either. u mean amelia??

Do they believe in love at first sight? or fate?: For a long time she thought she did yeah, but a certain someone has been ripped away from her so many times that she’s not sure fate or real love exists.

What’s their views on romance? Do they go after it or avoid it?: Arizona loves romance, more so now than she did in the past. She tries to after romance but, it doesn’t always work in her favour.

What are their turn ons and turn offs?: Turn on’s include someone who’s sure of themselves, someone who takes charge when needed, but also someone who can be soft when it comes down to it as well as someone who’s fun you know, gotta have a good ass LIT TIME. Turn offs include bad hygiene because if you’re an adult you can clearly take care of yourself, someone whose lazy and just doesn’t care is a terrible person too.

Were they ever cheated on or cheated on someone?:  Arizona is legit the cheater, every girlfriend she’s ever had she’s cheated on. She’s cheated on Callie once? Twice? Three times? Yikes, maybe y’all shouldn’t be married. Just marry ur hoe amelia. Who knows, she’s cheated on her a lot, is currently hoeing on her. It a mess.

Do they want to get married in the future?: She’s married already, but like she probably more so wanna get divorced!

Have kids?: Henlo, she has a LOT OF KIDS.

QUIRKS

Are they right or left handed?: BITCH IDK.

Is there a saying they keep on repeating?: Not really know, she’s preppy and bubbly so she says a lot of stupid ass shit.

Do they curse?: She tries not to but high-key swears at Amelia so hard, like drops f bombs and garbage.

What’s their worst habit?: Smoking fam, she does this a lot. jfc. a MESS.

Do they drink or smoke? How frequently?: Arizona drinks wine, a lot. She’s not an alcoholic but you better believe she has at least one glass a night, you know. And she smokes, only when she’s nervous but SHES HAVING AN AFFAIR SO SHES PROBABLY SMOKING 25/8

Are they an early bird or a night owl?: Most old ladies hop outta bed in the morning at like 5:30 but if this bitch gets to sleep in you bet she sleeps until like 2 pm. She’s more an afternoon person.

How tidy is their room?: PRETTY CLEAN FUCK BEING DIRTY WHEN U AN ADULT.

How long to they usually take getting ready in the morning?: Not long, she’s a quick ass bitch unless she does her hair and shit.

FAVORITES

What’s their favorite color?: She likes pink, teal, blues.. you know, eastery colours.

Favorite movie?: Disney Movies, really she’s five.

Music Genre?: Pretty much listens to anything except rap stuff. She’s just a smol soccer mom w an suv.

Food?: Is coffee a food? I mean, she likes pizza, and FRENCH TOAST.

Books?: Do medical journals count? That’s literally all she has time to read.

Favorite non-alcoholic drink?: COFFEEEEEEE.

Ice Cream Flavor?: Mint Chocolate Chip, gross ass bitch.

Indoors or outdoors?: Indoors.

[dreadedmercy]

Betrayal Of Trust

[[I don't know what I thought when I let my resolve down and let Trez get intimate with me. I glanced at the bedside table as my phone went off with a series of text message alerts. Without a thought, I reached for my phone and blinked as the light from the screen hurt my eyes. It was messages from Vishous. He wanted me to know that Murhder had arrived. I stared at the screen for a long moment before I pushed myself up into a sitting position. I glanced to my left and realized that I was alone in the bed. I let my senses kick in enough to realize that I was alone in this massive penthouse. I shook my head before I wrote a reply to Vishous.]] Does Dad need me? I'll need a lift home. [[I was going to explain further, by I didn't need to. This was not the first time that I was a hit it and quit it for Trez. I knew Vishous well, the big ass brother was protective of me. He would be the one to come get me after he dropped a few hundred F-bombs and curses on my male. I knew Vishous never wanted young and if I was honest, I was glad. I was basically his young as well. The idea of him having young? I hated it. Why? I don't share well. When Jane came into the picture? I had issues at first. Now? Jane is the only doctor allowed to examine me when I needed it. My phone going off broke me from my thoughts. I glanced down at the screen to see a message from Vishous. Let me up was all it said. With a nod that he couldn't see I willed the door to unlock sending a one-word response.]] Done. [[I pushed off of the bed quickly getting dressed just as the heavy footfalls of shit kickers coming down the hallway. As the door opened and those diamond eyes hit me from underneath the brim of a Sox cap I lost any strength I thought that I had. I plowed into his broad chest as tears ran down my face. I could feel Vishous growling, but I couldn't hear anything.]] Just take me home. Please. [[I was scooped up as if I was a young. I didn't fight as Vishous spoke to someone that I didn't even notice. "Grab her bag." I looked to my right to find the blond hair of Jane in my face. "Is this normal, V?" My eyes closed as Vishous spoke to his female. "For him, yes? For the rest of us, no." The familiar feel of leather on my back almost lulled me to sleep. When we got outside another set of arms took me from Vishous. I was going to fight until I heard the voice. "Easy, Mercy. It's just me." Zsadist. I eased closing my eyes again as I felt my cheek touched his chest. Then I felt a smaller had on my back as Zsadist started to walk. Bella. She had come too. "Let's get her home. He fed. I can see that. From how she is, she has not. I'll text Qhuinn and John. They will feed her." Vishous snarled. "No!" Bella knew better. Vishous struck his vein if I needed it. I could tell we were in the SUV and I opened my eyes finding a set of peach eyes stared at me. My fangs bared and I kicked and yelled like a wild animal.]] What the fuck? [[I was panicking, did they really think trapping me in a car with Murhder was wise? Before I could throw another F-bomb there was a loud bang on the roof of the SUV. I opened my eyes seeing John staring at the males through the windshield. My father was standing behind him. I let out a scream of his name as the door of the SUV opened. Grey eyes met mine as an arm reached inside for mine.]] Xhex! [[She nodded pulling me out of the car with ease. What I didn't expect to see was an extremely pissed off Trez headed my way. "Nalla, go to your father. iAm has breakfast for you as well." Nalla? He called me Nalla. My arms flew around his large frame. "I've got you. Go. Wrath needs to see you are okay." Without arguing I ran to my father and just as if he could see I was scooped into his arms. "There's my Mercy. That was not how I wanted you to meet him. Trez either." I looked up, confused by his words. "Trez had come to see me. You were still asleep." I wasn't surprised that my father knew the unasked questions spinning in my head. I was lowered into the SUV with ease as if my father could see. A sweet flower smell hit my nose. Beth. I turned my head and smiled before my eyes closed again. "Trez, my man, she needs your vein." Dad was right and before I could say anything the sweetness of my male's vein was at my lips. I drank without argument. "Wrath, I'm sorry. I failed as a male for her. I will fix it. You have my word." I looked up at Trez as I sealed his vein. "Sleep Mercy it's okay. You are safe." I looked up at the rearview mirror and saw iAm wink at me. Yes, Trez was right. I was safe with him and my father, the blind king guarding me. A low voice was fading in and out as I started to drift off. "I will kill all of them for doing that. No one tricks my daughter like that." As I finally fell asleep I knew my father wasn't joking. They had betrayed his trust and when it came to Wrath that was something one just didn't and definitely shouldn't do.]]