#i either do this or my sister throws a tantrum and berates me for 2 hours because i dont like my dad

[butchvamp]

my dad forcing me to talk to him and his family on zoom i would literally rather someone come and cheesegrate my palms

[uncloseted]

is it wrong not to pursue relationships with your siblings? i'm moving out soon and i have two younger siblings, my parents think that i should be closer to them, but i think that they would be better off installing a tracking device on my shoulder. my siblings aren't exactly open to having a personal relationship. and i've never bullied them or went out of my way to antagonize them like my siblings do to me, i've always just left them to their devices and did my own thing. i have a clash in values and how i have fun to them. they dislike eachother too, but they have more feelings in common than i do with them.

sibling #1 is a special case, they're around my age but mentally still a child. they live in their own world and have divorced themselves from the world of typical teenage behaviors (drugs, sex) because it makes them uncomfortable. but they also think it's appropriate casual conversation with family. my sibling asked me why i was on birth control in front of extended family because they don't believe that i engage in the typical teen behaviors (this is why i can't have a relationship with them, because they don't understand taboos) they can also be agressive and unempathetic, but not on the level of #2. sibling #1 constantly takes jabs at me and has no empathy for my own mental issues. they can throw tantrums and cry but it agitates them when i do. sibling #2 is still only a child (within the 10-13 range) but they've shown disturbing behaviors like attacking the family pets and blaming it on their friends (i've witnessed it). needless to say they don't have many. they have a weird psychological issue with me being older, and they copy what i do (like a normal sibling) but they convince themselves i am copying them and 'punish me' by lying or destroying my things. recently they have become consumed by the idea of me gossiping about them with my partner, and keeps trying to come up with petty schemes to steal my phone and scour my messages. i have consoled them about them being the victim of this by their friends before, but i shared other information in the conversation as benign as going to a party (with parental permission) which they turned around and tattled to my parents about with no provocation. they also feel like our parents are trying to spy on their phone. they watch me to the point they set an alarm and wait for me to come home so they can berate me for being on time? so i don't want a relationship with either of them and wish to cut off contact, it may be petty but i don't want the childish behavior of my siblings following me into college.

In general, I don't think there's anything wrong with setting boundaries, reducing contact, cutting off contact with family members, or just choosing not to actively pursue a relationship with them. Sometimes we don't get along with our family members or they do things to hurt us, and it's totally okay to protect our own mental health instead of the relationship.

In your situation, you're moving out and starting your life at college, so it makes sense that you don't want to have to deal with your siblings while you're trying to navigate that new environment and being on your own for the first time. I think that's totally natural and healthy. That said, I would try not to burn bridges. I know it probably seems impossible right now (because my parents used to tell me this very thing and I never believed them), but sibling relationships can grow and change a lot after all the siblings become adults. I'm the oldest of three, and I never thought I would have any type of relationship with my sisters, but we're actually pretty close now. It can be kind of nice to have someone around who understands how you grew up and has known you your entire life. I'm not saying that will necessarily happen or that it's likely in your case, but just that it can be nice to keep that option open in case you end up wanting a relationship with them in the future.