#i dunno if i can even donate money. the money i have isnt even something i earned by myself

[naenaex0xx]

okay few okay, glad I got that out of the way

[duckiesdoodlesdelight]

(i hope it’s okay to post this here in the cookie run tag! you can scroll past if you’d like)

hi!!!! this isnt very colorful but!!!!!!!!! im opening commissions and whatever money i gain from it will be split and donated to teamtrees and wikipedia ! 

you can donate directly to them too, if you’d like. 

im affiliated with nobody i just think it’d be very sexy of us all to help these causes and i like to draw so... yeehaw o//o

SO!!! here’s a link with a few commission options readily available its right on this text (it might not appear in the tags so...!!! please feel free to reblog it. i encourage it !)

(below the cut is one of the images explaining prices. theyre a little high so then i dont get too many commissions at once)

bartleby has made her return! i posted this image earlier but without any tags. 

further explanation:

Headshots are a basic 5 dollars, colored or not. Anything without shading doesn’t add any money to the end price. More information on headshots are with icons, where most are headshots.

Things past headshots are more expensive because... more body, of course. You can also request certain sections of the body, I guess. You can’t mix heads and feet though that’d look kinda weird. unless if youre requesting like Kirby or something. feel free to ask me any questions about prices and how much something would cost

Colored cell shading means that it’s not black and white. B + W is very simple cell shading so... no worries about that. 

Smooth shading, as the image shows, is a bit more fluffy. You’ll be able to see that more in one of my secret santas which will be posted one of the first days I can post it ^^

Possible questions:

Q: Why are you?

A: i dunno

Q: How much would a black and white full body cost with a background?

A: Depends on the background. Even in black and white, backgrounds can be complex or simple.The more objects, the more complex.

Q: What can’t you do?

A: im baby i cant do nsfw. i also won’t be doing overly complex designs (im pretty sure on the commissions thing i mentioned it being +10 dollars, which i’m okay with)

Q: can i get a discount?

A: im sorry imaginary person you cannot since im doing this for causes i think are important. wikipedia is free information which is the most important thing and trees help us live 

Q: does it have to be cookie run?

A: no! as long as it has a picture reference that can be color-picked off of, i can do it. I will ask you about certain parts of the character if i don’t understand it.

you can ask whatever questions you want! im considering making a questions section on the commissions sta.sh file 

[fishfingersandjellybabies]

This might be long so gonna put the short of it up here:

I’m struggling a bit financially, so if you’re so inclined, please check out my short story on Amazon! Free if you have Kindle Unlimited I believe, and still helps me out. And leave a review too! Also found out it’s listed on GoodReads so if you want it to count towards any reading challenge, feel free!

Anyway, probably more personal stuff under the cut. I dunno I’m writing as I go.

I’m still trying to ‘find’ myself after the disaster that was 2019. And most days are good. This week was rough mentally. My anxiety has just been SPIKED for about ten days now for no reason and my depression is seeping back in. I feel lonely, but only on the internet? Which doesn’t make any sense haha.

I want to get back into the things I enjoy, like writing and photography, but with everything you stop doing for a while, it’s taking a lot to get back into, and for some reason my brain just won’t get up and do it. but i still think of it every day.

I want to write more. And not just write, but write original content, not just fic. But I also don’t want to do it for the sake of doing it. I want to write for profit. I want people to read what I write. I want to write for people. Have them give me a basic character or storyline and let me explore that creatively. But you know, pay me for it haha.

So I’m trying to figure out how to do that. Open a patreon? Or a ko-fi? Or just keep word-vomiting and publishing on Amazon? Can I somehow mix writing stories with doing photography prints if people would want to buy those too?

And I know this probably isnt the place to say such things. I’m under the assumption most of my audience here is younger folks, or teenagers. (whether that’s true or not I don’t actually know.) and then also most of y’all are just here for fanfics. and that’s not going to make me any money in the long run, even if I did commissions, which I don’t super feel comfortable with.

My job is fine. It doesn’t pay a whole lot, but for the most part it covers my bills. For the most part. I’m starting to dip into my savings more than I want to and that’s scary. and maybe that’s what’s spiking my anxiety. But I’m not one of those people who just go ‘hey I’m sad and poor please donate to me so I can survive!’ I want to earn my keep. So even if writing is just a side-hussle, and doesn’t bring in more than like. $10 a month, and I know that’s being generous to myself, that’s still something that would help.

So I don’t know. Finding yourself is harder than it sounds, you know? being independent, being an adult, being stable, it really sucks. 

So support would be nice. patience with me would be nice. I guess not abandoning because im inactive would be nice but also like. that’s not your fault and I’m selfish so? I don’t know. my mind hurts a lot these days.

anyway, here’s a descriptive pic of my position most days. shoutout to the Cat Wonders for dealing with me.

[shaddy-bee]

I KNOW ITS BEEN LIKE 300 YEARS BUT-

5 things you’ll find in my bag

Right now theres uhh Notebooks, both school and 1 art. Drink mix ins, with such great flavors as sour apple jolly rancher and crush pineapple (tm) Two packs of cards, one of which steam punk themed and the other your regular ol bicycle. A calculator. Its a shitty old one but its for tests, i have google and shit for anything i need myself.

5 things you’ll find in my bedroom

A roommate. Idk if he is gay or what but he isnt straight, name’s will. Chill dude. Sleepin rn, what a fella MY SICK ASS COMPUTER IM MISSING OUT ON BECAUSE MY ROOMMATE IS ASLEEP AAAAAAAAAAAAAA I WANNA PLAY ROCKET LEAGUE WITHOUT LAGGING TO HELL also programming my mods. Need to upload that shit. Shit what number we on, 3? Okay cool. A bed. Wow really a bed in your bedrooM? yeah its pretty fuckin spectacular i know. I dont have posters n shit so like i gotta be creative you feel. A microfridge. Now i know what youre thinking, “ah a small fridge whats the big deal?” but no you dont understand, its a microwave fucking bolted onto the top of a fridge. They gave zero fucks attaching these two together and apparently the name is the same way, WHY NOT A FRIDGEWAVE EVEN LIKE MICROFRIDGE JUST SOUNDS LIKE A SMALL FRI- Last but not least, im tempted to just say my wallet here tbh, cuz its old but like, youd EXPECT that now would you? Something boring and mundane for me to fill out the word count with making everything super exciting so nah man, fuck it. Theres air in my bedroom. Fight me.

5 things I’ve always wanted to do in my life

Make a videogame. Like okay, a lot of stuff on this list is jokes and stuff, and I know im going into too much detail and my followers will probably murder me in cold blood for this shit, but im serious about this one like - i have some ideas, but i never have the motivation alone to like work whole-heartedly and finish one but like, at some point in the future id love to sit down and just go at it and make a game. Doesnt matter if its popular or big or small just i wanna make something that i love ya feel? I wanna like, go to newark, delaware. I know, its delaware and all, no one lives there, but ive met a bunch of cool people there and i was promised a donut run sometime, so lookin forward to that. Yknow that post awhile back that was like “i dont wanna be rich and like buy shit, i just wanna have enough money to throw at kickstarters whenever i want without having to strain on my food and rent costs” thats me. 100% Like i wanna have just enough money to be able to donate to cool people and watch them do cool shit - it wont always work out but thats fine, I just love shit. I wanna be able to donate like the high prize and fly out to meet these game studios for coffee and shit and just talk with em and see their passion and ideas. I love it. Im not actually really sure besides those. Like idk. I think itd be cool to enter a game tournament with my brother and win, but i doubt thatll happen and its not super like on my desires just itd be cool cuz we named ourselves Sora and Shiro after NGNL and to see that like, have us win would be great. Yeah. Ill make my fifth to think of a fifth one.

5 things on my to do list

FLOPPY DICKS i mean disks. Floppy disks. I do binding of isaac ab+ modding shit, and im currently working (its mostly done for what i want it to do) which adds a new consumable called floppy disks, effects are based on viruses, bugs, and just computer based shit. Like BSOD for instance, which makes the screen literately bluescreen. Or atleast look like it. Cant wait to watch people play with it. I gotta work on the programming class project too but honestly i dont waannnaaa. Like its cool as shit. Recreate a card game using c++ code. But man, i just love Apocrypha and Floppies so much more. Eat today???? Please. Dining hall opens in 3 hours. Its goddamn 4 am. I want my food. Dunno if ill get it - if ill stay awake till then. But i want it. Probably draw some stuff? Like i posted one drawing already (check it out if u wanna ;) kay?) but like theres wacom tablets here i can just kinda use whenever???? its great. I love being able to just draw stuff on em. Even if i suck at drawing, even if it took 10 hours to make the one i posted here, still love. Probably play more rocket league. Sleep first, soon as i get that food im CRASHIN BOI IM OUTTIE HA but uhh, rocket league has a halloween thing rn and i like playing it. Was playing earlier today and i matchd with a dude in 2v2 that had the same car, skin, AND colors set up as mine. Totaly random. We kicked some major ass together. I kept thinking of the same hat comic the entire time. (also my card was superior because it had furry ears on it ;))

5 things that make me happy

Getting an idea for a thing and working at said thing until like boom it went from this abstract idea to now it has a physical form and it works! And its fun and its great and i can share it with other people and they can have fun too!!!! that feeling is wonderful.  Obviously friends man. Just doing shit with people can be so great sometimes - like not all the time sure but like man. Its nice to talk to people and share experiences and just smile and tell bad jokes and have them groan but like it anyway like thats the shit. Going out at 2 am and walking to a nearby run down schoolyard and swinging on the swingsets and watching shooting stars burn up. Thats the good shit. Getting tents and setting em up in your friends back yard when your friend from far away comes up for a few days, and playing ridiculous games in a group like kick the can or fuckin zombie screaming your lungs out in the dark to freak em out, or just talkin around a fire about fuckin life man. The people make life great. Shits worth living for. I realize that last answer covered a LOT of shit but like, im just gonna add here videogames. Would be amiss if i didnt mention that, considering the rocket league rant above lmao. Yeah i better not make this category any longer.

5 things I’m (currently) into

Isaac modding, probably will be for awhile. Its good shit. As a suggestion from one of the people I work with (we also fuck around its a good time) i have started watching space dandy. Its a slow progress through lol like an episode or two a day but god man like its pretty ridiculous and the main character is pretty much everything i was expecting from seeing him everywhere. Rocket league again. It comes and goes with various different games to tide me over, give me a break from working. Bout 2 months ago or so said relaxing time was dominated by anime - i suddenly went on like a massive streak of watching shit. By that i mean, i watched all of hunter x hunter in like 2 weeks, among other shows prior to it. But yeah. Fuck man HXH I LOVED THE KING WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. I have too many emotions about that. I wrote a rant to the Groupchat (tm) about the fucking battle and how everything is in slow motion but it fucking like makes it like foreshadowed and have so much of an impact and still so much fucking happens even while everything runs at super slow mo just GOD KLASFJBHUGHASFIUHIPJASK anyway. Yeah. Music, as always im listening to like constantly. Wireless headphones are a wonder for this, but uhh....i cant say im especially into any specific thing rn right? Like a bit ago i was super into joywave and then that faded out and now im just listening to whatever random shit, yknow? But I am into music in general. Its good. Art! A lot of times i dont do shit like for drawing right, like especially not in like pencil in notebooks but like, i sorta started doing a lot more art stuff? Like i had a period awhile back last year where i stopped using pencils and used only pens and i just loved the aesthetic of the ink like how it looked (funny how im doing the opposite of the fucking inktober though, huh?) but yeah im back into using pencils to draw shit occasionally. Im still terrible at drawing people (which is what i see mostly everyone drawing on tumblr lmao RIP) but its fun to sketch stuff out and just let my thoughts run and bounce to some music and shit right? Also the tablets. Especially with the tablets.

5 things people may not know about me (at least on tumblr)

I basically constantly wear sweatshirts, and they all have like earbuds where the strings go. All the earbud shits are broken pretty much, like occasionally they work (the one i have rn does) but like, i dont ever really use them? i have wireless headphones for my phone and a headset (because i need the mic for my computer) for said computer so like, idk. But yeah. I rarely take em off when im not home, and sometimes even when i am i just kinda keep em anyway? (also just now i realized i talked in the section for room shit about all the stuff in my current dorm, my room at home has all KINDS of wierd fucking shit in it. Really missed an opportunity there.) Like many people i like to stay hydrated and shit, but drinking water all the time seemed like a chore more than anything so i got like drink mix ins and shit, mio’s or whatever offbrand version you can find at your local SUPERSTORE CONGLOMERATE. I drink em like all the time pretty much so atleast im health in one way :P. Also gummy vitamins. I dont excercise but you can only ask for so much. Idk, its hard to think of things for this section because tumblr knows so little about me yknow? Like i never make my own posts or shit like its SUPER rare so im pretty much just tryna find random facts but that might not be interesting? Like i have a bad habbit of like talking way too loud when im excited about something right? Not quite yelling but like getting there and like idk. See? Thats not super interesting but it is something no one online would be able to really know ya feel? Idk. I mean physically im kinda fat as you do, but im also like wierdly strong? Like for someone who never works out i sure do have arm strength if nothing else lmao. My endurance is shit tho. Honestly? I can only blame it on osu and groceries. Osu is just a game i like where you mash buttons to the beat of weaboo shit tier music. The groceries is just because like, well, my policy is Least Trips Possible which means carrying in 13 bags at a time if need be it, fuck it milk too? And a watermellon? Bring it. 

Who am I tagging? Idk man. Just for shits and stuff tho i do wanna tag @theoriginalyami just to see what all’s changed in teh long time since i actually went to fill it out :P Dont feel like you have to add as much as me tho omg @milkchocolateowl because honestly? love you. Think about you a lot, just like glad im mutuals with that ray of sunshine. Good. @fantaledfish <3 (this is the friend i mentioned earlier, runs a QUALITY blog i guarantee it, better than mine for sure) @dragonfucker-supreme always top in my notes, a silent bond, like two guards assigned to watch back to back in the early dawn. Birds gather round. I can only tag so many people (i set myself a limit of 5 because...idk why i just mentally it felt right) so for my last trick gotta go with @ask-oncies-jizz like cmon man name changes for the win, also has quality icons and quality shitposts tbh, supreme top meme. Have fun yall.