#i drank hair oil a few times. i ate strawberry pound cake scented lotion. i drank a little bit of motor oil.
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WHAT??? you-?? hUH? ...you're so powerful
i'm an adult living alone for the first time ever with poor impulse control and a massive sweet and savory tooth. this was fated by the stars to happen i think. i'm like if sisyphus actively chose to roll the boulder up and down because he thought it looked nice tumbling down. so nice that maybe it would be worth the work it would take to get it up back up there so he could do it again. well. this isn't like that at all but you understand.
#fool me once shame on you#fool me like five more times except i knew damn well what was gonna happen and still did it anyway uh. still shame on you.#it really did taste good though......#it had a nice tang to it! it was salty and fruity and like when you get perfume in your mouth#would've maybe tasted good mixed with some tajin on an actual grilled mango....maybe.......#but i made myself stop eating it before i could try it because the last time i did it the stomach pain was really bad and my mouth stung#and i was scared i was gonna need to go to poison control#but tbh i was more scared i was gonna need to EXPLAIN what i did and why to poison control#embarrassment may very well be the one reason my liver is still intact. thanks embarrassment 👍#ok i can't blame this on no one being there to stop me i've been doing shit like this forever#it's really not even the worst thing i ever put in my mouth honestly#i drank hair oil a few times. i ate strawberry pound cake scented lotion. i drank a little bit of motor oil.#i licked nail polish because i wanted to see if it tasted like it smelled. it did not. it tasted so bad.#genuinely a miracle how i'm still alive and healthy. you're nothing to me kid. i'm god's special little princess and i'm never gonna die#fortunes told (asks)
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