#i dont want to leave y'all to starve

[amoschaos]

Sorry for being gone for so long im unfreezing like mariah carey

[kaisfruit]

Hiiii loved your first first about kai!

Could I request a one shot or headcanon about each of the ninja and how they would pleasure a fem!reader pls?

How they pleasure you | All ninja x fem!reader headcanons

a/n: omg tysm for my first ask <3 this is like,,one of the few times ive ever written nsfw so!! i hope its okay :3 also im gonna leave out lloyd cuz ik technically he's an adult but idk it's still a bit weird imo warnings: nsfw under the cut (duh),cunnilingus (cole, zane, nya) , slight size kink mention in cole's part, degradation in kai's part, inappropriate usage of elemental ability (jay), umm thats all i can think of im srry if i missed anything ^^

Cole

Ugh idec he's a big guy. is that a collective hc that the whole fandom can agree on? i think so

def uses that size to his advantage when y'all are alone together

I'm talking like MANHANDLING

only if u ask tho cuz cmon we all know he is such a caring guy he would always take your wants and boundaries into account

okay, my horrible down bad size kink out of the way-

mans has a big appetite (wink wink)

goes down on you like no other. like, he treats your pussy like it's breakfast, lunch, dinner, AND DESSERT babes

there would be no breaks with him. i cant say this enough, but he is eating you out like a man starved

overstimulation bound to happen srry i dont make the rules

he would NOT ask for anything in return

this man is the biggest giver when it comes to sex oh my lorddd

you're in charge but like he is if you know what i mean?

like he does what he knows you love, but on his own terms

ur in the bed and he's just instantly pinning you down yk using that strength of his, spreading your legs as far as the can go, and boom diving in head first

srry i could fill up like 3 posts of just cole eating you out im that passionate abt this topic

Kai

Plays with your pleasure like it's a damn toy

This man is the biggest tease ever

Though, his teasing does lean a bit towards minor body worshipping bc he's just everywhere

Marking you up with hickeys wherever he can get his damn mouth

Hands? can barely keep track of their movements. One second they're playing with your tits the next he's two fingers deep in your pussy

Let's just say he's taking his time here just to make the actual sex feel absolutely amazing on your end

But rlly it gets him going seeing you all whiny beneath him at his never ending touches

it's a win-win if you think about it

THAT DAMN MOUTH.

kai is not the guy for u if ur not down for a bit of degradation because DAMN

he has to come second place to jay in the yapping awards bc he's always saying smthn during the act

he pays attention though. listens or feels your reactions to every filthy thing he whispers to you.

absolutely ruins u for anyone else. gl w this man yall <3

Zane

He is so damn PRECISE??

Like, how does he know exactly how to touch you in that spot in order to get that reaction?

LOVES i mean like absolutely LOVES fingering you

being able to watch you come undone on just his fingers? god it is everything to him

will also add his tongue into the mix bc even tho hes a robot he cannot get enough of ur taste

just so calculated w every movement

bro made sex into a science 😭😭

tells you how good you're doing for him, how perfect you look, etc.

loves praising you bc it's the honest truth of how he feels about you

tbh 50% of the pleasure he gives u is from the pure love u can feel with every slight touch, every kiss, everything

soft dom vibes iykwim

REFUSES to even try to get himself off if he hasnt attended to you first

also an extreme giver like

he would get rid of entire body parts if it meant making u feel even better during sex

okay thats hyperbole but like

this nindroid has so much love in his robot heart for u and he needs u to KNOWWWW

Nya

A GIRL'S GIRL U ALREADY KNOW WHAT IT IS

she has all of these boys BEAT when it comes to pleasuring u bc of her same gender advantage

her head will stay in between your legs until you are absolutely SCREAMING her name

that fact fills her with immense amounts of pride btw

i see her as giving u a good mix of gentle and rough touches that like come together to make the most intense feeling ever??? if that makes sense

she's so good w her mouth like,,,everywhere

her favorite place to have her mouth is on ur pussy ofc, but she could also give a vampire a run for their money with how attached to ur neck she is

marks litter your neck

she's so good at finding that one little sweet spot that makes your body squirm

tends to multitask as well

like if she's currently a knuckle deep in your hole then you can also probably find her mouth licking and sucking at one of your nipples

everything she does to you is just so confusing in the best way possible

Jay

everything with him is just so fast-paced

he barely gives you any time to catch your breath in between anything

just one thing after another with jay

it mostly comes from his overzealous nature

your body makes him feel like a kid in a candy store im not even gonna lie. there's so much he could be doing he doesn't even know where to start

constantly talking. what did you expect from the motormouth himself?

half of it's mumbles of how gorgeous or how breathtaking you are and the other half is just downright filthy

honestly that second part would be such a turn on cuz u wouldn't have expected it from jay

the first time he used his element on you it was an accident

he didn't even realized it happened at first. he felt you jolt at the sensation and his first instinct was to apologize instantly, but he never even had a chance as he felt how you clenched down on his fingers and the moan u let out would forever be ingrained in his brain

from that point on, he's constantly looking for the best opportunity to let the smallest current just give a little tingle to your skin

jay really knows how to keep things interesting <3

[nerves-nebula]

this gonna be a bitchy post lacking in nuance but who cares. im annoyed.

child predators and abusers will use literally whatever is most effective to groom someone, that's kind of the whole fuckin point. pointing out that they can use certain media to groom kids is like pointing out that you can drink liquids. like yea you sure can. you can groom a kid through their interest in sesame street. you can groom a kid with adventure time. you can twist even the most harmless story book with a Nice Upstanding Moral at the end into whatever you want.

when i was in high school I basically fell in love with any teacher that gave me food cuz i was fucking starving and that's a way more effective way to gain my trust than like, idk, sketchy fandom porn. (which i also loved as a kid/teen but I never really talked to people online or in person about it cuz i didnt wanna get adults in trouble!) and if someone online was weird to me back then i just ghosted them cuz i didn't have to exist in meat space with them if they made me uncomfortable.

anyway back to my point: should we ban granola bars cuz they were a way to fast-track the trust of food insecure kids? the way some of y'all talk about abuse, and grooming in specific is so frustrating, like, what are you fuckin talking about. grooming is a series of actions a person chooses to take to get what they want, it's manipulation, what they use to groom people with is entirely situational and moreover irrelevant.

should we all just sit in 5 x 5 cubes and paint neutral faces on a canvas till we die or should we try to have systems in place to prevent adults from gaining so much control over kids just by being kind of nice to them. and that's not even getting into how censorship literally never works the way you might want it to. it's impossible to create censorship that isn't inherently bigoted and useless because the only people with the power to properly censor are the people with the most power in general. and they do not like the rest of us. and they are also often on the side of abusers, if not abusers themselves!

yall will gives thousands of notes to posts that basically say they want the haze code back cuz you're too dumb and reactionary to think about fucking anything other than "child abuse bad so i guess i agree." then go patting yourselves on the back without having helped a single child.

yall love to feel vindicated more than you care about victims. don't act like anything you do is for the survivors if your focus is always on retribution or censorship against the abusers. you don't care about us. you don't remember we even exist half the time. none of you have looked into what actually helps us, none of you internalize our complicated feelings, none of you are willing to ease up on your christian ideas of sex and sexuality unless we explain our entire traumatic backstories to you. and then you say we're broken and need help, as if what we don't really need is for you to back us up or leave us the fuck alone.

none of you care. you just wanna find acceptable targets for your anger so you can feel good about destroying the Bad Person. dont piss me off

[sammiesallow]

Sebastian Sallow headcanons

summary- dating headcanons with Sebastian. a/n- all my personal opinion! cw's- mentions of violence/blood, use of crucio, angry Sebastian

the jealous type. we all know this.

he gets so jealous when you spend time with Garreth, but then you reassure him it's ok :)

"I could never replace you with anyone else seb, you're my pretty boy"

melts at that btw.

nicknames galore!! he wants to call you everything and he expects it back from you too

'angel, darling, honey, sweetheart, pretty boy.

"you think I'm pretty? really?" "of course I do, Seb."

he gives you the most blinding smile you have ever seen. absolutely adorable

y'all are so loving?? he is definitely a lover of pda, doesn't mind holding hands, a hand on the thigh(not in an intimate way, just for some physical touch :D), a kiss on the cheek, etc.

Sebastian is always touch-starved and craves attention from you. even a look in his direction or a "Hi Darling!" as you're passing him in the hallway will have him smiling like an idiot for the rest of the day

more intimate moments are shared in private, however, like in the undercroft.

Merlin knows those paintings, gargoyles, suits of armor, even the floo flames lady will eavesdrop on y'all and tattletale to a professor if you do anything more than share a kiss on the cheek.

Sebastian loves you with all his heart. he couldn't bear the thought of you getting hurt or worse

every time you leave the castle, please send him an owl. it lets him know where you're going and it tells him you're safe.

he's worried sick if you come back with even the slightest scratch.

"Merlin's beard! darling, are you alright? are you hurt anywhere? do you want me to kiss it better???" he says as you come into the undercroft with one scratch on your face LOLL

it's all fun and games until someone hurts you. let's say you're on a quest together, somewhere in a cave and you two get ambushed. it would probably go like this:

"Diffindo!" an Ashwinder threw out the spell in your direction, hitting your abdomen and leaving a large gash in its wake. Sebastian yelped, not having noticed your state, and threw a quick "arresto momentum!" in the enemy's way to stall their time. "merlin! are you alright-" Sebastian stopped all movement when he saw you- you were hunched over in pain, groaning as you tried to stop the bleeding coming from the gash on your side. At that moment, he felt nothing but pure and unbridled rage. "you BASTARD!" Sebastian turned to the Ashwinder, (who was quite literally about to cast Avada kedavra on him) and cast crucio. nobody touches his girlfriend.

that's definitely one of his red flags.. he has anger issues, and won't hesitate to hurt someone if they hurt you. it's kinda endearing though

speaking of red flags- I'm not gonna ignore them? we all love him but he does have negative traits that will show through in y'alls relationship.

He's overly possessive and gets super upset when another boy tries to flirt with you. if you don't say something to the guy- sebastian will; and i dont think you want that.

he's not very in-touch with his emotions. he has a hard time expressing his feelings because of a) his insecurities and b) his ego.

but on a more positive note, you help him through these things!

meeting ominis and becoming friends with him gave you the opportunity to ask another person about sebastians troubles, and you can confide in him for advice when you need it!

you're sebastian's sunshine- quite literally. you help him through his tough times, and on a regular day, you brighten his mood imensely.

ON TO THE CUTER RELATIONSHIP STUFF!!!

HE WANTS TO CUDDLE YOU.

if he's tired he becomes 100% more affectionate- which means cuddles in the undercroft, his head on your shoulder in class, a hand on your under the table at dinner, etc.

Sebastian isn't the brightest, but if he has a class with you, he'll listen to anything you have to say.

he adores your smarts- whether or not you're actually smart is up to you, but it's not like he'll care. you could be the dumbest mf in the world and he'll still be proud of you!

he's your cheerleader! in crossed wands, the broom race against imelda, summoner's court, even an arm wrestling contest, he's there to cheer you on

it's because he never had someone to do that for him- losing his parents at such a young age, he didnt have cheerleaders to be proud of him through his achievments, so he does it for you!

in return, you take him on cute little dates!

little picnics in the vivarium are his favorite. he loves the feeling of laying of the grass and cloudgazing with you.

you know he needs to relax- so it becomes a regular thing for you two to sneak off to the room of requirement.

the undercroft is still a regular hang-out, usually used for absolute tomfoolery.

i mean, you sebastian and ominis will have stupid competitions all the time.

"let's see who can cast confringo the farthest!!" "Sebastian no!!" "Sebastian yes!"

chaos trio.

more importantly, chaos duo.

you enable his stupid ideas and make sure that he does them safely.

unless it's something stupidly unsafe- then you'll have to lure him back to the undercroft with cuddles and kisses. <3

A/N- MY REQUESTS ARE OPEN!!!! pls send me ideas!! :)

[squinch-depraved]

HOLE INSPECTION WITH A LITTLE BIT OF SLUT SHAMING PLEASE I dont care from who (sorry. feeling very feral today)

-🪐

hehe

CW: knife (as a means of removing clothing), degrading, dubcon (?) (but like ur in a relationship so this is a normal thing for y'all)

schlatt pushed you down onto the bed roughly, ignoring the weak grunts you let out as you tried to fight him. the wicked smile he had on his face left you afraid and breathless.

"stop fightin' me, doll, or this is actually gonna hurt," he warned as he tugged off your top. he tsked when you tried to resist and shook his head. "i'm bein' nice about this, i promise you. it can get a lot worse," he spoke the last sentence into your ear, hot breath leaving a tingling sensation everywhere it touched. with that, he used a knife drawn from his pocket to slice through the center of your bra.

you began to yell at him for ruining it before he looked at you in disbelief and smacked you, covering your mouth after the strike. he didn't need to, though- his eyes piercing straight through you rendered you speechless all on their own.

"you think you have the right to speak to me after the way you acted earlier, you stupid slut?" he asked cruelly. "that's right, shut the fuck up and let me use you like you deserve to be used." with that, he tore off your bottoms and admired you in your little black thong.

"such a pretty pussy for me," schlatt murmured. "my good little hole. so tight f' me, hm? so wet." he slid the fabric of your underwear to the side and dragged his thumb up your slick, collecting your essence and bringing it to your clit, where he started rubbing gentle circles. much to your dismay, he stopped when you started gaining any real pleasure from the contact.

after wiping his hand on the inside of your thigh with a smirk, he shimmied your now soaked panties off and stuffed them directly in his pocket. eagerly, he lowered himself down to have a direct view of your hole and spread you open with his fingers.

"god, i love watchin' you stretch out f' me like this," he breathed, staring in wonder at your entrance as he splayed out two digits. your cunt leaked your arousal all over his fingers, earning a low groan from the man. "fuck, toots, you have such a pretty hole." he was unable to stop himself from praising you; it was the most beautiful sight he had ever seen and you let him look whenever he wanted. "too bad that's all you're good for, huh?"

you let out a strangled moan as you looked around, anywhere but at him and how he was taking you in.

"yeah, just a fuckin' whore for me to use whenever i want, my personal little fuckdoll. fuckin' slut." he punctuated his sentence by spitting onto (and into, if we're being honest) your hole, and you squealed as you tried to process how turned on that made you. schlatt chuckled lowly at how your now gushing entrance spasmed around his fingers. "can't believe you're into that shit. i can just treat you like shit and you like it. you love it, don't you, you filthy fucking whore?"

his eyes flicked up to study your euphoric expression, but only for a moment, before settling back on your cunt. he eyed the space between your legs hungrily for a few minutes longer before diving in, pressing open mouthed kisses to your clit and working his way down to your hole. sliding his tongue in, schlatt moaned deeply and dug his nails into your thighs when you arched your back at how the vibrations rocked through you.

he ate you like a starved man, much more for his own pleasure than yours. but he was still incredibly good at using his mouth, the many hours you had spent in this exact position proved that. sloppy noises could be heard in the few empty spaces between the both of you moaning.

it wasn't long before he added his fingers to the mix, moving his mouth up to focus on your sensitive nub. curling them in and out of you at all the right spots was easy for him at this point, he knew your body so well. soon, you were gasping while you tugged on his soft locks, desperately trying to warn him what was coming (you).

but schlatt already knew, you were his whore, remember? his little slut. and of course he knows when his little slut is going to cum. so he pushed you just a little further, bit by bit, until he sent you over the edge and you saw stars. your legs shook frantically as you released all over his face, your orgasm made even more intense by the noises he made as he became soaked.

after a bit, he pulled away, spreading you open one last time for a good look and patting your leg gently. "sorry about the bra. i'll get you a new one," he said softly.

"damn right you will."

[jaiistg]

Enemies to lovers with Oikawa Toruu.

Authors note: Hiyaaa im back from the deadd, school's been stressing me out lately and I've been studying hard because I want to make my parents proud since they have high expectations of me.Im currently finishing my drafs and request's,Im sorry if it took awhile to write this HAHAJKAKAHAHAJJ

•You didn't really like Oikawa when you first met him,I mean....You didn't hate him nor like him so...Yeah.

•Your probably questioning why you feel neutral abt him Oikawa WELL YOU WERE WALKING TO THE SHOP TO BUY MILK BREAD BUT THEN YOU TRIPPED.AND YOU KNOW WHAT THIS BITCH DID????? HE LAUGHED AT YOU.But when he finished laughing he did offer you an hand "Hey are you Okay?" LIKE I LITERALLY TRIPPED DO I LOOK OKAY TO YOU?? "Nice of you to help me after laughing at me".

•You expected to never see his face again BUT NOOO....When you arrived at Aoba Josai YOU WERE MET WITH HIM.What a nice way to start school! "YOU?!" "The principal told me to help you with your first day to school cutie" "ew.I can do this on my own,leave me alone" and you got lost...THANK GODDD YOU SAW HIM,it was so awkward like you had to approach him from a bunch of fangirls giving him chocolates and shits😭 "Hey so.....I actually need your help...." "Ohohohoh?"

•You don't really know what his fangirls see in him.Was it his cocky attitude? Was it his narcissistic personality? Or was it his good looks? Even if you dont like him you can't deny that he has good looks,like bros magestic and knows it😭😭.

•He was really shocked when you didn't became all over him on the store,He was curious about you and wanted to see you again.You on the other hand WANTS TO AVOID THIS BOY.LIKE WHEN HE SAW YOU AT HIS SCHOOL HE WAS THINKING "this must be my lucky day" while you were thinking "Why does god hate me this much" LMAOO😭

•It all changed when your little brother was lost and you FINALLY saw him with Oikawa.He was so Gentle and Nice to him.You didn't expected him to have that kind of side.Maybe you were to judgemental of him so you decided to become friends with him and apologize.It was hard with his cocky attitude but you did it !! So proud of you

•As time goes by you became good friends with him surprisingly and got along with him ! It didn't take long until you both catched feelings for eachother tho.You didn't confess whatsoever because your afraid of rejection soo my boy Oikawa confessed first and didn't expect for you to return his feelings but he's happy !!

•We all know Oikawa has alot of fangirls amd it isn't rare for his significant other to be insecure of themselves because of It.He reassured you that he loves you more than anything and would never leave you for anyone.

•He would remind you everyday that he loves you so much,and he ALWAYS talks about you to his team to the point that whenever he says "do you guys know that y-" "dude just shut up already,we get it okay.Your in a healthy relationship 🙄". You get flowers everyday from him *winks*.

•And boy when I tell you,this boy is touch starved ‼️ whenever you guys walk to school together he would always hold your hand.And when your in class and you're tired he would always offer you his shoulder he gave the professor money so y'all could sit next to eachother,so worth it.

•This dude literally has all the love languages to exist lets not talk about quality time,yeah? BUTT HE MAKES IT UP WITH YOU WHENEVER YOU GUYS CAN'T SPEND TIME WITH EACHOTHER OKAYY.This poor boy feels so guilty and thinks he isn't worth your love just because you guys haven't spended time with each other for 2 DAYS pls comfort him.

•Hes happy that you support his passion for volleyball,its rare for someone to not get mad at him because he always plays volleyball and barely can spend time with his significant other.But just because you support his passion for volleyball doesn't mean that you support him ALL the time.When he is tired and exhausted but still wants to practice volleyball you say that he needs to take a rest.He can't say no to you so he did take a rest.He is really grateful to have a girlfriend like you !!<33

[kaisworlds]

so I found this video there is moaning so turn ur volume down...or up i dont judge

so I'm just gonna name characters i think fit the standard of the words on the screen

if the name is in red it means they stop acting like a brat if it is in blue it means they stop being quiet and just let all the sounds come out of their pretty mouths:) firstly though should i do more of these with my song lyrics if so you guys can send me the lyrics

moving on

One Piece

roronoa zoro

cw: nipple playing, zoro being cute

I feel like due to his pride he will refuse to make sounds until you start abusing his prostate while playing with his nipples. He will start to let out the smallest whines at the start but the volume increases as he nears his orgasm. Zoro is definitely super embarrassed about it when you two finish up avoiding eye contact

Hawkeye Mihawk

cw: reader is kinda hung, mihawk is a little bitch as usual

This guy....his ego is so high it'll take you a while to even convince him to bottom he tries to act like what you're doing is not affecting him and brushing it off with things such as "t-that's all you got?" "you begged me f-for how long to do this and this is what you have to present to me" saying your dick is small when its clearly not. He hides the urge to beg you for more when you stop saying something like you're getting annoyed by him. He acts quickly wrapping his legs around your waist before even realizing what he did he narrows his eyes coming up with an excuse "i-i didn't finish yet" you raise your eyebrows before chuckling, grabbing the under part of his thighs pushing it towards his chest making him hold his legs. You start pounding into him, moans slipping out from his mouth as he rolls his head back into the pillow his eyes screwed shut finally shutting the fuck up, the only words leaving his mouth are "please...more..." so cock drunk he doesnt even hear himself.

that was a lot longer than I planned

Trafalgar Law

poor baby is so touch starved he has to stop himself from moaning just from you gripping his thigh , he refuses to moan though because he thinks you won't like hearing it and because he finds it embarrassing how easy it is for you to turn him on when you guys fuck for the first time he is really quiet muffling his moans with the his hand until you stop to ask what's wrong and if he feels good he quickly nods blushing as he avoids eye contact quietly mumbling out why he doesnt make sounds you lean down to his ear whispering "i want to hear you princess i love the sounds you make" that alone makes his hole clench around you as he nods pushing your face away not wanting to embarass himself further as you continue he slowly lets out pants and groans until you start sucking and biting his nipples in which he lets out a girlish scream pulling you head closer to his chest.

y'all want more characters too this?

pt.2?

[koishua]

literally no scenario ever justifies carnage and destruction human greed is the one most terrifying forces ever. we call it nafs. leave it untamed and it will devour the world and beyond. it's easy to succumb to it and once you do, unless you starve it and let it know that it has no space in you that's larger than a speck, it will raise havoc and wreck entire homes, lands, times. what is the point of more? why does one need more than one needs? why more when more means less for another fellow human. why, when death is certain and nothing you have ever physically acquired in this world will ever make past the grave, does one need more?

why is it necessary to go to war? why is it necessary to hurt? why is it necessary to push people to their demise when we can all just pull each other up and forward? why raise a hammer when it's easier to drop it and leave it be? why is it necessary to do when it's easier to not do? when it's more pleasant to just let it be? why need more land? more power? is it not enough? why is it not enough? to advance? to become greater? why is it necessary to become greater?

my point is it's literally not that fucking deep. take a deep fucking breath and sleep it off my dudes. war and expansion is bullshit and i will die on this hill. take a chill pill and cut it out. being bad is harder than being good. or even just neither. be neutral for all i care just don't fucking start shit. all that and for what? nothing matters. you won't gain anything out of it in the end. "we must do this we must do that power this politics that" shut tf up and go back to being lazy and unambitious and quit feeding into your ego and do things that take too much energy and time and be normal for once.

"they started it!!" (and im not agreeing with this btw) so WHAT. fucking chill it's not like YOU'RE the one doing the killings stfu revenge isn't NECESSARY. "what about the lives we lost yada yada yada" okay so you WANT to ADD to it when the numbers are already that large?? END it. and if you started it in the first place, screw you. don't take others' shit and don't fight just dont. why is it necessary? if you've been wronged, scoot over somewhere else AND if you were the one who wronged, WHY? just stop.

idk how clear my message is coming across to the rest of the world but just stop. it's never worth it. especially when y'all are already pushing your old ages and are halfway to the grave already. tf you want at your crusty middle old age rn you could literally die of a heart attack two minutes later just relax, leave, and let leave. be and let be.

[daizzypop]

Announcement! 💫 DaizzyPop

Hey, sorry I haven't posted in awhile, I've been busy with getting used to my new school and other stuff. 😓 Also unfortunately the upcoming Sanemi fic will take longer because some of my drafts just haven't been good enough but I won't leave you guys hanging and I'll try my best to post the fic by October 13th so stay tuned!

Also guess what! NEW SERIES COMING UP! it's not a demon slayer one but rather a Michiko and Hatchin series! With you, the reader, joining Michiko and Hatchin to find Hiroshi together! I want to post a few teasers during October before, hopefully, releasing chapter one near the end of October!

So stay tuned, there's big plans for this October! 💫

Small peak at the Sanemi fic:

"I'm sorry...i shouldn't even be here in the first place...i'll excuse myself no-" "N-no no! It's..okay Nemi, dont feel bad! You can stay it's no problem!" "Really..?... Alright I guess I stay for a bit..." A soft smile appears on his face. He should really smile more...like right now...He's got a beautiful smile.

You smile back at him. "I'll get some tea and snacks for us, you must be starving."

That's all folks! Remember to take care of yourself and I'll see y'all later this October;)

💫💫💫

[iamhereonlytobeanunstableshipper]

LITERALLY THIS. What the fuck is wrong with y'all????

Just bc Palestine is still going through a horrible fucking situation it doesnt mean that we shouldnt talk about Venezuela too.

This current tendency to rise awareness about the situations that other countries are experiencing should be used against ALL injustice that appears, not only against the ones that yall deem "trendy".

Wanting Venezuela to be free from a dictatorship that is starving and killing the country and its people, forcing them to flee and leave their families behind, isnt a pro US intervenciomism post.

The US is a fucking genocidal disgusting state, and the fact that its against the venezuelan regime isnt bc of the goodness of its heart, its bc of the old capitalism vs comunism bullshit and to milk the country's resources. This is undebatable.

But, guess what?? A dictatorship is still a dictatorship even if its a comunist anti-US one.

Y'all are silencing venezuelan's voices speaking up on their suffering just bc it doesnt fit your political views. And that is the most selfish, disgusting, priviledged shit ive seen in a while.

Maduro is a dictator who is using anti-democratic ways to keep his power despite what the venezuelan people want. Thats the end of the story.

People are losing their jobs and homes. People are starving and living in the streets. People are fleeing the country forced to leave their families behind. People are currently being arrested for protesting for their right to choose their president.

11 people just died in riots advocating for their freedom and for a better future for their country. But i guess that they dont matter bc the US supports them, right?

Of COURSE we should keep talking about Palestine. We should NEVER stop talking about it until we see a free Palestine. But that doesnt mean that we shouldnt speak up about other horrible situations too ffs.

Suffering isn't a competition. Use this time and energy talking about both Palestine AND Venezuela (and Sudan, Congo...) instead of using it to mock venezuelan suffering.

Y'all arent helping Palestine with this bullshit. Y'all are just creating a pointless argument when we should all come together to talk about these issues.

(Btw, this isnt a pro capitalism or anti socialism post. This is a pro humanity anti dictatorship post)

see this is why i have a strong disdain for sloganeering instagram explainer activism because now people are making pro-US interventionism posts like this using the exact same language LOL

[jayjayghost3]

Agent 306

The story of Agent 306 Gender: Female Pronouns(they prefer): he,his,him,she,her(sometimes) Really high IQ Agent Captain

Pad 1 Its currently 1:51 and I'm still alive due to the noises of the monster virus 😭😭…Again😨. This is 306 and I'm the only agent alive from the explosion😰.I'm trying to stay focused and not get tired due to the late nights and long days💢💢. Will report again if more things happen. Something Fishy: Agent 306 reporting something fishy🐟. As you know I survived the virus… Well almost I'm still healing but almost healthy again. It just might be me and my senses or something true. I don't know what it is but I feel no cap🤔.I just need to finish the journey to get pills. I will report shortly😬. Months later: agent 306 is still alive >:) and he found one of his partners named agent 207 😅 I hope we get along and survive. 306 don't like agent 204 and 204 is trying to get through them but they refuse so they won't hurt their feelings and we are still holding on to them. Its a New Year for agent 306 but he really wants agent 204 to leave since they found agent 904 306 has counted how many times 204 and the 904 has did you know what and its been 16 times a from the last location till now and they hate it.

Pad 2 Agent 306 isn't alone either they have a lover too and they get along well and they understand each other they are the captains 306 and 407 are now the captains of the travel. They hope it goes well on the trip. We are now in the mutant forest and 407 is clinging to me but I don't mind I'm scared too. I don't really care about 204 and 904 they can die for all I care. "Babe I'm scared 😨" 407 said I know hun but we need to get through here for food😓" 306 said. "Any wish for us 306!?" 204 and 904 yelled " hmmm how about no because y'all get on my nerves because of sex!" 306 yelled "Calm down 306😞"she kissed 306 making her blush. "F-Fine let's keep going" After hours and hours of walking through the creepy forest 🗾 we finally see light and we run to it. Not even a minute later the couple started complaining about how hungry they were. So it was my choice to find us some dry meat before we continued.

Pad 3 3 years later 306 is alone again. All his friends including in his lover died in a fight with a huge mutaded monster. Luckly they were able to defeat it but lost everyone in the process. Right now 306 is walking in the dead road to the source to defeat the boss who caused all this.💀He ran out of food and now is starving. 306 is now looking like a pale corps walking on the road. His hat and jacket is gone. He is only on his uniform pants and white shirt. His curly hair isn't as curly anymore. 10 days later 306 found an open spot to place his hut. 2 weeks after finding his long lost friend 306 was walking once more still feeling the guilt of losing everyone one. All caught up in his thoughts he tripped over something and fell. After a few seconds of adjusting he looked down to see what he tripped over. In front of him he saw a coat and hat but it looked fresh washed? "Hey 6!" He heard from behind as he stood up. "I told you to stop leaving me like that!" 307 said fake pouting "Sorry 7. I'm just used to being alone ya know?" 307 put his hand on my shoulder "hey man I feel ya. Sorry for yelling at ya" I look at him "Hey no need to apologize 7. Ya know we both have anger issues" I chuckled. "6 what up with your coat it looks more new than usual." 307 said as I looked at myself " I dont know I found this on the ground……..For some reason" I said a bit concerned. 307 looked at me and shrugged "eh its prolly nun. Come on let's get going." 307 said as I nodded.

Pad 4

To be continued...

[nothingbutfilthx]

Katsuki bakugo- headcannons

- character is aged up 18+

(i need to write shyt for mha after the latest manga chapter, ifykyk)

sfw

- im sorry guys but he wouldn't call you teddy bear (even though i myself am completely upset by this) 😭😖

- however, bakugo does call people by their quirks or features, i feel he'd call his s/o ; gorgeous, brat or simply just 'MINE'.

- not alot of pda in public. Some. But not alot.

- tight hugs! Warm hugs too 😍 *swoon*

- jealous. Probably will threaten to beat someones ass for looking at his girl.

- speaking of jealousy... %100 will kiss you and hold you in front of said perv. Let them know only he can kiss you

- behind closed doors. He's a sweetheart.

- (this is kinda self indulgent, im sorry ..im not) he hasn't slept well since being kidnapped, one night you two were watching a movie, the movie is halfway? And hes asleep head on your chest looking so peaceful.. from then on he sleeps with you next to him. (In his opinion best sleep ever)

- no secret hes a smart cookie, helps you study.

- training with you. Unfortunately if he wants to be the best ..he wont hold back. But he knows your more than capable of defending against him.

- protective. Is ready to fight someone to the death if it meant protecting you. He knowd youd do the same ( i would definitely protecc kats 😭 )

- bakusquad. Obvi. Bakugo is obvi alpha of the group , denki has defs called you mrs alpha before..baukugo didnt hate it , actually he took it upon himself to call you Mrs. Alpha.

- if y'all get into an argument.. he's cooking and bringing flowers to apologize to you.

- carrys you firman style or bridal.

- dates with kats are either adrenaline fueled places or somehow end up being a bakusquad group thing. (Ngl wouldnt bother me)

- hear me out. The movie 10 things i hate about you ...the paintball scene.. yeah that but bakugo 😍😭😍. (Self indulgent? Yes? Does it fit? Yes. Mind will bot be changed)

- u.a does a prom thing. Proms arent his thing but he jumped at the chance to ask you. Seeing you dressed up and glowing like a goddess.. his goddess sparked a joy in him.

- if hes stressed. Shoulder massages.

- cooking together 😍 teaches you how to cook his and your favourite meals.

- says i love you anytime you or him leaves the door.

- fought aizawa so you could sit next to him in class.. (aizawa being a secret softie caved and gave in)

- he trusts only kirishima with you.

NSFW

- katsuki be packing the finest dick. Thick cock.. lengthy too, one vein going to the head (how does one describe a dick..?🤣)

- brat tamer . Dominant as fuck.

- degrading. 'filthy whore, daddys lil slut, desperate bitch, needy cum slut'

- dont worry he also gives praise. 'good girl. Doing so good f'me. Look how pretty you look. Taking me well'

- hes the top. Definitely likes to be called master, sir or daddy.

- Markings! Hickeys. Bruises, hand prints

- choking either from his hand around your throat or his dick being down your throat either way it pleases him to see it

- filthiest dirty talk. 'like daddys cock deep in you huh babe? Feels so good in you. Cum all over my cock slut.'

- trying to be quiet? Good luck (🤣) he will thrust into you at a brutal pace to force a scream, squeal or whatever out of you. 'cmon babe louder let everyone hear how good you feel' (😳 ...hot..sh don't u judge me 🤣)

- multiple rounds. He will only finish when hes %100 sure you'll be fucked dumb or sore tomorrow.

- any position. As long as he can get a view and hear you. Hes good..if he had to pick bent over or mating press. He loves being deep in you .

- hair pulling. Wether hes hitting it from behind or your sucking him off hes pulling your hair

- headgame 😫 man will go down and eat u like a man starved. Wont stop till his face is dripping with your juices.

- stamina. He aint cumming anytime soon. He's making sure your not moving when y'all done

- he will cum anywhere. On your tits?yep. In your mouth? Yep. On your face? Yepp. In your cunt? Double yep.

- TEASER!!!!!!! Will tease you and edge you if youve sassed him or bratted him. 'aww wanna cum? Mm not yet babe..gotta make you sorry for that attitude today. Wanna cum? Apologize and beg for it'

- okay fr tho. He is absolutely the king of aftercare. He knows he is overly rough but a nice bath and clean sheets and clothes outta fix it + cuddles and whatever dessert he can find.

- drunk bakugo had admitted he'd like to tag team you with Kiri. Though you wait for his sober self to say this to act on it.

😍 him in the jeans thoo ...ffffff ddaaaddyyyy

[bozowrites]

Hi! I hope youre doing well (if not i hope it gets better :)). Could I request headcanons for Bakugo, Izuku, and Denki with a gn reader whos really touch starved but they dont know how to ask for affection so they just kinda end up letting it pile up?

Headcanon

↳ Request above!

Characters: Bakugou Katsuki, Izuku Midoriya, Kirishima Eijirou, Denki Kaminari, Mirio Togata, Nejire Hado, Toga Himiko and Todoroki Touya.

TW: lots of characters 😅

A/n: sorry for the long wait anon and @lovelychamomile

BAKUGOU KATSUKI

Bakugou won't initiate first at the start of the relationship, so both of you tend to stagger away from affection.

Both believing neither wanted it.

But y'all are dumbasses.

Both craved it so bad smh

Would honestly be angry that you aren't initiating it. Wants you to hold his hand or hug him first.

People start thinking you two aren't even together with how you guys avoid touching like the other has some sort of disease.

When Ashido says something about you wanting his touch, like a hug, but you don't know how to ask for it he is just so happy.

After a study date, he hugged you goodnight.

S H O C K

Both of you left that fear zone from a start of a relationship (after like three weeks) and moved on to always touching each other.

Get a room

MIDORIYA IZUKU

Shy Boi

He thinks you aren't comfortable with being hugged or such when you tense under his embrace.

Doesn't do it as much anymore.

Let's you move at your own pace without stressing you.

He is baby.

I love him.

Starts to notice small habits you do near him.

Example: brushing your hands against his. Glancing at his hands and lingering your stare. Watching other class couples be cuddly.

He asked you about it and after your blushy, "angry" reaction, he learned something new about you.

You is a lil tsundere

He initiates more hugs and handholding now, bringing you closer to him when watching movies and such.

Finds it adorable.

KIRISHIMA EIJIROU

He asked about it at the start of the relationship.

He wanted to have everything perfect for you, so asked simple questions about boundaries and such, so he didn't cross them accidentally.

Very good conversation to have with your significant other.

He knows from the start that you aren't great at asking for things, like affection so he always initiates and tries to assure you that he's okay with it.

Very sweet about it.

Send me a kiripima pls

DENKI KAMINARI

Is pretty affectionate, so honestly he won't even realize because he is initiating it all the time.

If he wasn't doing it for awhile, for some unknown reason, and he sees how much you lean towards him, he'll get happy.

He realizes how much you enjoy his love.

Pride forms in him.

MIRIO TOGATA

Is very sweet and caring, so the start of the relationship is simple hand holding and hugging, maybe a few cheek kisses.

Nejire might notice first how you lean much more into his touch and even the lingering stares.

Will tell Mirio and tease him a little.

He'll ask you about it.

From there your affection with him increases tenfold.

NEJIRE HADO

She notices your pent up emotions immediately.

Hugs you from behind and asks if you were all right.

She feels your tense and sees your pink cheeks.

In awe.

When you start to stutter out how her affection was wierd, yet you leaned in for more, she felt like she was in pure bliss.

TODOROKI TOUYA

A teasing little motherfucker.

He just knows you want him.

He'll leave lingering touches on you and seem like he wants to cuddle you, but really he just wants to be a bitch.

If you throw a tantrum or become all grumpy, he'll roll his eyes and bring you into a hug.

Becomes snarky, but definitely won't pass up the chance to snuggle with you as you sleep.

TOGA HIMIKO

She finds it so cute~

She teases you (nicer than dabi) and always comes to hug you and cuddle you on a sofa, a floor, a bed, anywhere really.

She loves the grumpy, red face you make when you want her love.

[enzie-ki]

OOC || Uncanny counter s2e5 thoughts

SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT

Poor Mr.Ma :( bro lost his wife and unborn baby I feel so bad.

And his poor mother

it hurts so much song older women cry

PIL KWANG YOU BASTARD LEAVE THEM ALONE

GELLY WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO HER

Y'all better not try and recruit him

YOU AND YOUR STUPID COIN PIL KWANG

Oh Mo-Tak is theorising now

AHHH MY BABY'S BACK

THE ATMOSPHERE IS WRONG BUT I APPRECIATE YOU

oh no now he has to tell his grandparents

WAIT IT'S GOING BACK TO WHEN HE SAVED HER FROM THE ROOFTOP

NOOOO THAT'S TOO SAD WHY

WHY THAT

OIL DEMON LEAVE HIM ALONE

YOU AND YOUR STUPID SCREECHING VOICE

AHH STUPID PRISON BULLIES YOU BETTER LEAVE HIM ALONE

LEAVE HIS WIFE OUT OF IT

OH NO IT'S KWANG AGAIN

leave him alone!!!

WAIT I JUST REMEMBERED IT WAS HIM GELLY AND WONG THAT KILLED HER DAMNIT

LEAVE HIM ALONE PIL KWANG

(I just realised it's spelled Hwang/Gwang not Kwang)

Who is this guy

why u flirting with ha-na

wait you're the piano guy!

WAIT HA-NA FLASHBACKS

HE VISITED HER WHEN SHE WAS IN A COMA THAT'S SO SWEET

BUT SHE CAN'T TELL HIM

AYO CHAIRMAN CHOI COMING IN CLUTCH

they ain't gonna shoot him right

BRO YOU'RE SCARING MY BABY BUT I'M GLAD YOU'RE GLAD HE'S BACK

GLAD THE SNIFFER IS BACK BUT GELLY I HOPE YOU LOSE YOUR OTHER EYE

Now who the hell are these guys

WAIT SHE'S BEHIND THE CONSTRUCTION SCAM???

NOO THESE GUYS REALLY RUINED MR. MA AND MRS. LEE'S LIFE

bro they're trying to kill her?

OH IT'S NOT ACRYLICS SHE'S GOT IT'S KNUCKLE SPIKES

hell yeah go counters!

Oh shizwizzle Gelly really got them all huh

Not that I underestimated her but damn

YEAH YOU BETTER RUN GELLY

JEOK BONG DONT REVEAL URSELF

BRO SKIS JUST STEP OUT OF THE GAS

Ur poor nose baby

Wait they know about the construction stuff now!

Ms Chu hell yeah you go girl, start theorising!

AHH HAN-UL MY OTHER BABY I'M GLAD MO-TAK IS STILL WORKING WITH YOU

Oh not Pil Hwang again

Stop being so weird and mysterious

You're hot but don't overdo it

AHH WALL OIL MONKEY DEMON BE QUIET

STOP TALKING ABOUT HIS WIFE

OH NO HIS EYES YUP HE'S GONE

AAA yeye HAN-UL!

YOU AND MO-TAK ARE A GREAT DUO

Jeong-Yeong would be proud

OH NO IT'S THE GUY THAT'S IN LOVE WITH HER AAA

wait but I wanted her and Mun to get together! I'm conflicted about this...

He's so sweet!

WAIT THAT'S MUN'S FRIEND OH SHI-

LET JEOK-BONG EAT DUMPLINGS DAMNIT

DONT STARVE MY BABY

WAIT UNG MIN TOLD MUN OH

wait jeok Bong likes her?

Girl you got all the men SIMPING gawsh dayum!

AA SHE'S HAVING FUN THAT'S GOOD

Wait don't touch her

don't touch her or you will get thrown into next week

HUH SHE'S NOT?

oh yeah he has no powers lol

OH NO JEOK BONG'S HERTBROKEN

My poor baby

I want Ha-Na to be happy though

Ooh money laundering, great

HAN-UL I LOVE YOU BUT PLEASE LEAVE THIS IS THE WRONG TIME

Gelly which poor man are you choking now

WAIT THEY'RE BREAKING KNYK THE PRISON?

LEAVE MR. MA ALONE YOU FURRY BASTARD

HE'S GONE GONE OH NO

GELLY WHAT DID THAT GUARD DO TO YOU

ok Mr Kwang/hwang/Gwang you look really hot rn but I still hate you

WHY DO I FALL FOR ALL THE VILLAINS ALL THE TIME DAMNIT

LEAVE MR MA ALONE

I FEEL LIKE LATER ON HE'S GOING TO KILL THEM

OR AT LEAST TRY

Now that I notice both Gelly and Mr k/h/g look fine

GELLY LEAVE HIM ALONE

STOP

WHY DO YOU BULLY HIM SO MUCH

HE'S GONNA GET WAY MORE POWERFUL THAN YOU ARE AND YOU'RE GONNA D-I-E

GET YOUR HANDS OFF HIM PIL K/H/G

NOOIOOOKKKKOOFKRJDHSKSBSJKSBSJSKSVSJSJSNDBSMKS

nuuu my baby😭😭😭

Mo-Tak and Mun are genuinely such a good duo

there's so many good duos in this show

Poor Mr. Ma's mother, I feel so bad for her.

IT'S THE OIL DIMENSION AGAIN GAHHHH

OIL MONKEY DEMON GO BACK TO WHENCE YOU CAME

YOU AND YOUR STICKY HANDS AND STICKY SELF

EW STOP KISSING HIM

YOU WEIRDO WTF

DUDE PROBABLY JUST GOT COVID-20 AND HEPATITIS-F

Bro leave Mr. Ma alone

You're all gonna die bro but I don't feel bad because you're all pricks

Actually no I do feel bad

He's straight up vecna-ing them rn

WHY ARE PEOPLE RUNNING AT A MAN WITH TELEKINESIS

WHY ARE YOU STILL TRYING TO GET AT HIM

ayo?????

bro drank some redbull or some shiz bcus damn he got WINGS

NAHH YOU BETTER NOT TURN HIM AGAINST MUN

OIL MONKEY BRAT

AND IT ENDS THERE GOSH DAMNIT

Overall, great episode, 10/10, everything was great(seething with rage), I saw so many of my favourite characters(foaming at the mouth), the plots coming together is honestly awesome (gnashing teeth)

OOC || UNCANNY COUNTER S2E4 THOUGHTS

SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT

glad we've got another furry lady (Gelly) to replace hyang-hui

If she hurts my baby I will break her acrylics

and also her spine

Pil Kwang and Mun are really just stranger things-ing it right now and I'm all here for it

It's giving eleven vs one but better because I like this show

Ah yes the power of a promise made you stronger good

how dare that man try and shoot chairman Choi if I snatch your weave this second

Gelly please stop with the scratching

So many problems would be stopped if people used their teeth as weapons

Getting choked? Bite. Getting held down? Bite. Jeok Bong I know you're new but please just bite her

MS SO IS BACK WOOHOO AND WONG IS GONE BOY GETCHA VAMPIRE LOOKIN-AHH OUT OF HERE

(he was kinda cool though)

oh damnit I forgot about the other Chinese counters

WAHOO MS CHU AND MS SO APPRECIATION

Chairman Choi you better thank Mun for saving you from that bullet

mo tak coming in with the tango disc pop off king

MS CHU WHAT HAS GOTTEN INTO YOU

CHAIRMAN CHOI IS SIMPING REAL HARD RN

DAMN ARE THEY GOOD AT DANCE

oh no jeok-Bong are you good

my poor baby noo

GELLY YOU DESERVED THAT I DIDN'T EVEN REALISE YOUR EYE WAS GONE BUT HELL IF YOU DESERVED IT

Pil Kwang why are you naked Pil Kwang why are you naked I don't care you just got out of the bath WHY ARE YOU NAKED PIL KWANG WHY ARE YOU

excuse me what is this wet monkey looking thing

you look like you smell of bin juice and petrol

STOP CORRUPTING MY MR. MA

STOP BREATHING IN HIS FACE TOO YOU'LL GIVE HIM BLACK LUNG

oh I really hope he doesn't get possessed but I have a very bad feeling he will

JEOK BONG WHERE ARE YOU

YOU BETTER NOT LEAVE ME NOOOO

GELLY YOU FURRY BASTARD YOU SCARED HIM

NOW HE FEELS WORTHLESS ASDAGFJGKGASHKHF

HE BETTER COME BACK

I swear if its because his pores are clogged that his power stopped working or because he got punched I will cry

Jeok-Bong's dad stop comparing your son, that happened to me and it was BAD

My poor baby UnU

SEONG-SIK YOU BASTARD

HOW DARE YOU PUT MY BABY IN DANGER

LEAVE HIM ALONE

LEAVE THE DAD ALONE TOO

ayo why does this man have so much blood in his nose

AHH HIS POWER CAME BACK

HE JUST HAD TO GET GUT IN THE NOSE AGAIN

HELL YEAH GET WRECKED YOU STINKY BASTARD

GET HIM BABY WAHOO

PUT COW DUNG ON THAT MAN

MMMMM Y'ALL IN YUNG BETTER BE CHEERING

WELL DONE JEOK-BONG

👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏

TO ETERNAL OIL HELL WITH YOU EVIL SPIRIT

AWWW JONG-GUK ISNT MAD GOOD

WAIT HE'S 21?

I SMELL MORE BS IN THAT STATEMENT THAN JEOK-BONG DOES AT WORK GOSH DAMN

THE BIG BROTHER STATEMENT

Aww him and his dad are bonding again finally

This is so wholesome I'm going to cry

MHM UR MAKING YOUR DAD PROUD JEOK-BONG

💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙

No because tell me why Mun has such a good fashion sense

And Mo-Tak too

And Ha Na

All of them actually

Gelly I regret to tell you but that steak is raw

I hope you get food poisoning

STOP MAKING CONNECTIONS DAMNIT

LEAVE MR MA ALONE

NOO IT'S THE EVIL OIL DEMON THING

LEAVE HIM ALONE

YOU AND YOUR MONKEY SOUNDING VOICE BETTER SINK BACK INTO THE OIL OCEAN

Mo-Tak please relax you're like three 9 year-olds in a trench coat

KWANG AND GELLY

YOU BASTARDS

EVIL OIL DEMON STUPID

LEAVE MY MR. MA OUT OF THIS

HOW DARE THE EPISODE END THERE

[feral-thin]

TW: i talk about my ED and occasionally mention substances, depression, and SH

~please leave if you dont have an ed or if my blog triggers you in any way. I want y'all to be safe 💖

~I dont share thinspo/starving tips or encourage ED's, this account is only for me to vent, post memes, and sometimes talk about my interests. please dont take away my safe space.

~if you ever need support and want to talk, or just need a friend, dont be afraid to message me. I'm here for you 💞

[dawolfboris-again]

A skit me and my classmates had. The skit was entirely improve, and I narrated it, everyone else playing along. I do not remember the entirety of it but I do remember a large chunk. A few lines may have been rewritten but the emotions are all the same.

Me: welcome to the play called... "The tale of a fruitcake seller." (Looks at the Taming of the Shrew) lets begin. We come across... No, came across, came across I mean, a fruit cake seller who sold his cakes by method of singing. This first customer had the quote-unquote "pleasure" of experiencing the sellers idea of rap. I severely hope that the seller never persues a music career.

Seller, who can actually sing pretty great when not acting: (in a offkey attempt at rap) We sellin' frUit cakes-

Two girls pretending to be said fruit cakes: FRUIT CAKES

Student playing old man: no i dont want-

Seller: we sellIn fruiT cakES-

Fruitcakes: F R U I T C A K E S

Old man: get off my property

Seller: you want some fruit cake?

Old man: no I don't

Seller: why dont you want some fruit cAKE

Fruit cakes: früit cäkes

Old man: i hate Fruit cake

Me: (trying to keep character) the fruitcake seller now left the old man, unsuccessful-

Fruitcake seller: (normal voice) i wanna sell some fruitcake...

Me:so now we come across a middle aged woman, who is unfortunate enough to hear the seller attempt to sing country. I would name an author, but I don't want to offend one.

Seller: (mimicking country singers) y'all want sum froot cake

Fruitcake: (obnoxiously) FRUIT cake

Lady: no.

Seller: why not? Git yourself some froot cake

Fruitcake: fruitCAKE

Lady: (who by now I've figured out shes doing a southern accent) well. I cant have it.

Seller: (normal voice) why not?

Lady: well, it just so happens, I'm severly allergic to fruit.

Seller: (leaves sad after stammering or something akin to it)

Me: (laughing now as I've broken character) so now- (pausing for my fellow actors who are also laughing) now we watch as the seller comes across- across a mother and child who have an even greater misfortune of hearing the seller practice- OPERA (laughing) I feel horrible for this poor mother-

Seller: (practically screaming) BUY MY FRUITCAKE

Child, who in reality is two grades higher that her mother: FRUITCAAAKE!!!

Mother: child, no-

Seller:FROOOOOOOT CAAAAAKE

Fruitcakes: (trying to not laugh) Fruitcake!

Child: (grabs a fruitcake) fruitcake! Fruitcake! I love fruitcake!

Mother: we are not buying fruitcake!

Child: (watching the seller leave (said seller parks his cart by me)) but mommy i want fruitcake!!!!

Mother: no. We are not buying fruitcake

Child: mommy please-

Mother:no! No matter how much you whine, we will not buy fruitcake.

Child: i hate you mommy i hate you!!!

Mother: oh, come on.

Seller: (screaming once more) fruitcake!!!!!!

Child: (gets onto the cart that the fruitcakes are on) goodbye, mother

Fruitcakes: (laughing, unable to properly sing lines)

Mother: (yanks child away from fruitcake)

Child: noooooo-

Seller: (trying to escape)

Me: (laughing) now the seller-

Seller: buy some fruit cake!

Child: F R Ø Ø T C Æ K E

Me: (doubles over, drops the Taming of the Shrew)

Seller: (runs away and parks by me)

Child: (gets dragged away while screaming no)

Me: (calmed now) now, the seller, unable to sell fruitcake-

Seller: nobody will by my fruitcake. My children will starve!

Me: (chuckles ever so lightly) -quits trying to sell fruitcake. Now... Now its unknown as to why his job was unsuccessful

Seller: (dramatically) whhhhhyyy!

Me: but I believe it is because he just could not sing.