#i dont think ill stop being interested and keeping up with characters i care about but im probably not gonna continue playing

[vipersiia]

XYX HEADCANONS

i have recently joined the bloomic discord and talked abt xyx, with,,, so many people and here r my headcanons, there are,,, a Lot of them and they are so so so fluffy i promise

OKAY SO FIRST OF ALL - he has such a thing for petnames, and will Melt if u reciprocate

absolute pro at not being able to take what he can dish out, dont fret though, he absolutely builds a tolerance

ironically uses terrible pet-names in public, if you use some on him he Will make it a competition and he Will win ("snookums here wants a refund on this." "yes sorry, mcdreamy here said it didn't look good on me" "oh schmoopy , how you wound me i did not sa that")

xyx is such a people-pleaser, so he Knows what you like and what you don't, he'll keep an eye on your expressions subtly ("hey babe why is there so much snack you really like in our pantry?" "it was on sale!")

he will Spoil you, he's not the type to spend a lot of money on himself but on You?? oh you better watch out

still careful with his money but if you're eyeing that bag, or pair of shoes, or poster, he will buy it for you.

even if you off-handedly comment wanting something, expect it in your arms Soon ("i saw this really cool poster at the mall today?" "oh really? what did it look like doll?" "it was like, of my favourite character holding their love interest" "oh thats very cool" schemes)

will absolutely do the evil villain chair in dark thing with Cat if you come home late ("i've been,, expecting you" "babe its 1 am what are you doing up?")

he knows your favourite drink, exactly how you like it, and it tastes perfect everytime. YOU NEVER TOLD HIM EITHER, he just had you try a buncha things and watched your reactions ("hey love, im trying out a new recipe, wanna try?" "of course!")

dont think about it but seeing him playing with cat, watching the muscles in his arm flex??? him Noticing you noticing and flexing a lil harder, before going all out, Cat meowing indignantly over his bicep???

stop thinking about xyx coming home from work, seeing you and Cat cuddling on the couch?? being so in love that he scored someone as amazing as you?? he is just, so so so, in love with you at the moment?? that he just, comes over, picking u both up and twirlin you around. Cat immediately, outraged bats him the face but he doesn't notice because you're giggling so hard rn

if he's meeting your parents??? ohhh be prepared, he is such a smooth talker and hes Proud. He comes in, nicest most neutral cologne, nice powersuit, a subtle chain necklace with your initial???

he is All smooth talk, keepin an eye out for any cues of like or dislike on topics, always complimenting whoever cooked

when getting to the Interrogation? oh he's Ready ("so what do you do for a living" "oh well i work as a lawyer, it makes me elated to be able to provide for mc like i can" "nice, nice" *visibly impressed*)

the car ride home after??? oh he is Menace, he is all grins, puffin out his chest like a bird ("doll they loOoooveee me" "did you see that? arent you proud love?") you're gonna have to keep saying yes but its okayyy because you're both sickeningly in love with eachother

him being hella cheesy, tellin u one day ("hey doll, i bet i can hold the entire universe in my hands" "what??") and immediately cupping your face??? pulling you into a soft kiss??

you keeping that in ur mind,,, ready to strike back?? sitting on the couch with him laying between them, cheek pressed into your thigh as you both play with Cat? when Cat leaves, leaning down and cupping his face in your hands??? ("you are so gorgeous babe") and he goes Red (mc - 1 / xyx - 4million), his breath Stops.

leaning down to kiss him??? catching him even more off-guard?? absolute knock-out. he tries so hard to play it off ("ill never be as gorgeous as you doll") but being sooo off his game? so caught off guard??

a sunshower happening, cue you, dancing in the rain like a madman??? him coming over and seeing you?? glad u cant see him because he is Positive he looks so sappy rn. eventually meeting his eye?? running up to him and grabbing him by the hand?? leading him into the rain?? he immediately takes over the dance, spinnin and twirlin you around.

pulling you into his arms?? arms resting on your hips as you grab him by the face?? pulling him into a kiss???? laughter breaking out between you two, as he peppers your face in kisses??

doing research on filipino wedding customs, finding out that you traditionally ask the parents for their blessing

ASKING XYX'S PARENTS FOR THEIR BLESSING?? going over to their house for a dinner plan, getting him distracted and asking his parents for their blessing??? planning the wedding with them??? burning the unity candle?? the rice toss?? the money dance???

at the altar, can't even get though the first line of his vows before he cries ( "and i, xyx tak-" *literally sobbing*)

DOING HARANA FOR HIM??? getting all the members of the bloomic server to participate, as you sing his praises? good at singing or not he is so choked up in giggly, hands over face ugly bawling

lighting the unity candle with him is a whole ordeal, neither of you can stay still long enough to keep the flame steady, almost lighting the tablecloth on fire

him holding you as close as you can fit against him?? teary eyed all over again because wow, he cant believe that you really wanted to marry him??

post first dance, as the night wanes, hiding behind the couples table, on the floor, in his arms??? as he feeds u mango sticky rice and vice versa???

sayin sum cheesy shit like ("oops i missed a spot, hold still love") before leaning in for a kiss??? not realizing the photographer AND videograper saw this and got it all in 4k??

the discord prompts that inspired me, thank u i luv u all(real)

[oranberryorion]

hii!!! im new on rotumblr but all my friends in bba were using it and kept asking if i had it. now i do!!

you can send me asks or whatever and ill respond for sure!!! not like i have much better things to do xD

updated 9/5 10:00 (boundary update + updated story)

ooc

i have to say: im new to tumblr and to rotumblr also, (started rotomblr 6/31) but i really love orion and wanted to make an rp blog for him becasue im bored and i have so much free time ..........

about the mun!!!

hi! orions mun here!! figured i should write this now as of 8/8, i havent introduced myself ?!!!??

you can call me adon or guy!!! guy is more the silly nickname but i truly dont mind what you call me ^_^

i go by he/him strictly but you can freeball with neos if you want

ive been into pokemon since i can remember :3 b/w was my first games, but ive played back to emerald and ive played the entire sv dlc and all!!!

a mutual of mine from my main account happened to have a rotomblr account, and when i looked through some of it, i got interested and made an account too!!!

interaction!!!

pelipper mail/malice: ☑️

musharna mail/malice: ☑️

mystery gifts: ☑️

magic anon: ☑️

in character anon hate: ☑️

please remember that if any of the mails/anons oversteps my boundaries, then i probably wont respond.

this is also pretty important to say: i dont care WHO interacts with me. fallers, sapients, eebydeebys, hybrids, ocs, self-inserts, in-game characters, i LOVE interaction. i respond to anything i see as fast as i can and unless its weird or stepping beyond my boundaries i WILL interact back!!!!!

that being said, i should establish some things

- mod is 15, orion is 16! nothing nsfw. suggestive jokes i really dont care but hes 16 so you should know the boundaries for that

- any rotumblr blog is allowed to interact (back). literally anyone. you want a sapient pokemon to talk to orion?? he'll answer!! want an eeby deeby to roleplay with orion?? ill respond!! even fallers or such, (as my own bff literally has two faller blogs LOL) asks, anons, general questions, spam mail, ask games, interaction is always allowed!!!!

- i love character events and planning. if you have an idea for a small event between our characters, or a type of relationship they have, anything, please let me know!!! my discord is adonciant and you can add me (im not always active, so ill try and accept any friend requests or such as fast as i can) OOORR you can just dm me on here!!! preferably keep it to orion, so dont go messaging my main about anything ^_^

- i (accidentally) do long threads of reblogs/interactions. i swear none of it is purposeful, i just happen to interact back if i get no indicator of an ending conversation. if you want, you can make an ooc tag to tell me to stop reblogging back or anything. these threads do not get tagged with anything, either.

- theres some content warnings to this blog, roughly listing: spoilers for sv dlc, emotional abuse, drug/substance abuse, scientific experimentation/human bioengineering stuff, traumatic responses, and any mild suggestive jokes that may pop up. more are to be added if any should be added

- this is exclusive to orions blog because of a certain anon that came from the associated grimsley account with orions lore. do not mention trafficking to him or the mun myself. orion was not trafficked nor sold. always think before you send an anon that there is a person behind the screen who has to read it.

- my main is @adonciant ! likes and follows come from there! + the pfp is orion, so you'll know who it is ^_^

if you wanna learn a little bit about him....

orion was born as a single child, and grimsley often visited him and took him out of town on trips. he was passionate about turning orion into a strong dark specialist, to which grimsley often took him out of the region to catch pokemon for his team.

one day, colress approached the two with a gamble that grimsley was tempted by; lots and lots of money. however, it risked handing orion over to colress

colress won the gamble, and took orion with him to alola. colress was met with new technology and research from both the ultra recon squad and the aether foundation, which drove him to study about the human body and the effect pokemon could have on them.

colress used stolen research and parts of technology to craft a mechanical body for orion

now he has a cybernetic body! later on he attended bba ^_^ feel free to ask orion how his body works i have fun writing ways for it to function

i may come back and edit some of this info. again i dont know what im doing on here but im figuring it out as i go 😭

POKEMON NAMES!!! his team finally has namess!!!!

hydreigon: colbur

scrafty: hondew

shiftry: aguav

weavile: enigma

samurott: rindo

grimmsnarl: dyna

[lexxchinchillaa]

so i havent really be keeping up with the TOTA Takeover (i was watching doctor who all day everyday) BUT i will do this last one.

i think the show is wonderful. it discusses mental illnesses without making it the entire plot or entire personality of characters. it displays it realistically and doesnt romanticise (by this i mean they didnt just show positive things or ignore it completely) or... obsess over it, i suppose. it wasnt completely focused on the characters "flaws" or illness. while they were mentioned, they actually still made the characters relatable and realistic, as opposed to (imo) Heartstopper, which felt to me like it fetished queer people, but thats a discussion for another day.

it was nice for a change in media, because its not often that you get media from the perspective of someone outside of the mental hospital willingly going inside because they genuinely enjoy being there and the people there. thats one of the reasons i love Eddie, he isnt afraid of what people will say about his new job, or if he is, its not stopping him even though (im pretty sure?) he doesnt get paid for it. hes a kind and lovable protagonist and it was interesting to have his side and opinions on things.

the side characters (i suppose thats what they are) are easy to fall in love with because they have so much depth and are genuinely interesting as a whole. it had, i think, important representation of Rosalie's OCD. it was important representation because it doesnt seem like we get a lot of OCD in media anymore (not that we ever really did, at least not in the things ive watched). i personally dont know much about the disorder but the representation still felt... correct, i suppose, to someone who has little to no knowledge, which is still a good sign because it means it was easy to understand and, yes, still seemed realistic. it was easy to feel bad for Rosalie because of her story and because she was treated and written as a real person.

have you ever watched something and thought, "this character is a bit cardboard-esque"? doesnt it make it tricky to actually feel bad for the character in question? its difficult to sympathise or empathise with someone who is uninteresting or unrealistically written. like in the Twilight movies, for an example. its difficult to feel bad for Bella because shes a kind of basic protagonist. she has simple wants and has simple struggles. whereas in TOTA, the characters have different wants than is usually displayed. like Campbell for example. he wants to be a radio show host and whats stopping him? his struggle to find a place that wants to take him and, i would say, his fathers disapproval. while Campbell isnt openly warm with his father, its still difficult for Campbell to ignore him because its his dad, the man who was there, but not necessarily there for him, all his life. its still difficult to get over someone whos supposed to love and support you telling you that you wont be able to do something.

Campbell is another example of a well written character. it was easy for me to love him, and not just because he was played by DT. he was a funny character without just being comedic relief. his bipolar disorder was displayed well according to me, someone with again, little to no knowledge in the subject. it was nice to have a character who has specific wants that are different from other characters in other medias. he was interesting because he was, say it with me, written as a real person. Campbell was easy to love because he was written and played like someone i would personally want to be friends with. hes funny, caring, friendly, unique, and protective. he sort of immediately likes Eddie and is friendly and talkative with the older man. he doesnt hold back and doesnt bite his tongue when he wants to say something.

TOTA was silly and light hearted while still bringing up important subjects that i dont think a lot of media is willing to bring up. i think, unfortunately, it might have been before its time. i think if it was made recently or in recent years, a lot more people would watch it and talk about it. i think its a beautiful show that, while not laying too heavily on it, discusses mental illness in a positive way. it doesnt act like the characters disorders are flaws, it treats it as something the characters have that might make them unsatisfactory to other people but not like it is unsatisfactory and i think it was lovely.

overall, i thoroughly enjoyed watching TOTA. it was different from most things i watch but not in a way where i was reluctant to watch more and only liked it at the end. i thought the ending was brilliant, even if it wasnt a massive everyone-got-their-way sort of ending. it was honestly nice to have media that had only two characters that i can think of getting what they want. TOTA had some sad parts that were so well written i cried. and if something bad happened to a character (haha... ha... hm), i cared about the character and was upset because they were well written and i loved them.

i know i used the words "well written" and "realistic" so many times, but the main things that struck me about TOTA were those two things. while i love sci fi and fantasy, its nice to have a show that felt real, like it actually happened. i loved the characters and the plot. the writing was superb. its an amazing show that more people should watch.

(hi. sorry if this is terribly written, im not great at these sorts of things. i tried keep it focused but if i ever strayed away from the main point, i apologise)

[styxvii]

I'm sorry if this seems intrusive, but I'm really curious.🙏

Hello! It would be very interesting to know what inspired you when creating the song "Victimized". Or how you came up with it, what (what feelings, memories, experiences) did you put/create in the song?Maybe there are characters/people that are associated with this song?

Thank you🩷

omgg no ur okay!! rutbawierbt this is going to be long gomen 🙏 I think its important to share these experiences

for the sound i was listening to d3r and can of bliss a lot at the time 😭 TW for abuse ment, SA/harassment

FOR CONTEXT IM A LESBIAN I kept having dreams about one of my abusers breaking into my room and staring at me in my bed among like other dreams of him and it made me realize i was dealing with a similar situation all over again. I had a DIFFERENT person who was se/xually harassing me and getting off on crossing my boundaries and watching me panic and freeze up/not knowing what to do (which now that im writing this down i realize thats literally what was happening in my dream). I couldn't understand why i kept letting him take advantage of me and then walk away from the situation and be like?? why did i do that? why do i keep giving in to him when i feel DISGUSTING afterwards?? I feel so uncomfortable every time but i never stop him. and then i realized i WAS trying to stop him but he would persisted anyways, told me it was fine, told me it was normal, told me im freaking out over nothing, and i just didnt even know how to combat someone stomping over my boundaries so effortlessly? and id totally shut down and freeze and he'd look at me in this way, his eyes looked like they were devouring my fear. and this definitely wasn't the first time someone had done this to me, it was just the first time it clicked in my head what was happening. Through out all of it I was so frantic and I felt this intense feeling of dread all the time, but he kept telling me it wasnt a big deal, i was so confused 😭 so i suppose the song is about subconsciously knowing someones hurting u but not quite getting to the point where you KNOW it yet? and u just dont understand why u keep ending up with people like this over and over. It was bc i had no self worth and severe abandonment issues! and well people like that love people like me (at the time, im better now lol) bc we're easy to lovebomb, gaslight, and manipulate and we'll do anything to be loved (especially bc i was manic the entire time)

so also while im talking about this omg i wish people would stop being like "mentally ill girls are my type" or "im into girls with bpd" bc to me i hear it in his voice, and all my other abusers voices. like they like girls like that BC we'd do anything to be loved and these types of people feed of the desperation we have to find someone after time and time of being abused so severely we develop PERSONALITY DISORDERS, who will care for us in a genuine way. they want to take advantage of us :( (i get comments like this and they definitely were in my mind while i was writing this song)

[actualbird]

hiya zak!!! it's 2am and i can't stop thinking about it- but if you had the chance to write how luke gets cured of his illness in canon, how would you do it? (eg. via "surgery, but there's risks"/"oh we found a magical anecdote to your illness, yippee!...etc etc)

hiya "anon" hehe >:3c!!!! first off, thank you for this ask cuz it's super interesting. my answer to this is rather specific and looks bad at first but Trust Me and hear me out on this alright

if i had the chance to write how luke gets cured, i wouldnt make him 100% cured. medically (and this is very vague because im not a doctor), i would make it so that maybe new medication or a new treatment plan is found that makes his illness no longer terminal, but chronic. the new treatment has to be taken regularly as maintenance, along with regular diagnostic tests like EEGs and regular check ups with aaron. the new treatment would also come with a lot of side effects like mood swings, fatigue, nausea, etc.

basically: i dont want him to be cured, but i obviously dont want him to die. however, i want him to have to fight this for the rest of his long life.

it'll be an arduous process, one that never ends, but one he has to get through. and one he dedicates himself to do every day, because it's worth it, because it's worth life,

because he's worth life.

why do i want this? well, first off, it's because i'd love to see more chronic physical illness representation in fiction. it's not always clear cut with illnesses, and sometimes there Isnt a grand cure and it's more like an endless slog of maintenance

second off, i will repeat something i said in a previous ask i answered about luke's illness, but a sudden and 100% cure feels like a too-neat deus ex machina to me, narratively. his illness has been shown to be as Very lethal and Very painful and Very hard to treat, so for all of that to suddenly go away, well....the writing would feel a tad cheap to me if it were that easy.

and third off, because it'd fit well with the themes of luke's stories and luke's character

actually, let me go back to that previous ask i linked because im gonna copy paste a whole lot from it HAHA since my view hasnt changed since i wrote it. in that last ask i say:

in general with stories, i am less drawn to super neat resolutions and im more drawn to resolutions that are more like “and things werent perfect and they never will be, there will always be problems, but our characters will be okay and theyll keep getting better and better, and it’s in this push and pull of struggle and learning and progress and getting through where their happiness lies” ever since luke was a kid, even before he developed his condition, hes had the fear of being a burden to his loved ones. and when he does get his terminal condition, this fear is worsened and he starts to see his existence in other people’s lives as a whole as a burden of pain and grief that isnt worth the trouble. and…i dunno, i just like the idea of him continuing to live but also continuing to have these problems that still spark fear inside of him and still take so much work to manage every day. and out of habit, he braces himself for pain, not just for the kind his condition gives him but from Life because Surely, His Loved Ones Will Get Tired Of All Of This, Of Him and The Problems He Comes With, Right? but surprise surprise, they dont. because they care about him. because this should not and is not a dealbreaker for them continuing to care about him. aaron creates treatment thats more on the preventative maintenance meds angle so luke doesnt have to just wait for a pain episode to pop up and then dry swallow painkillers every time. it’s not infallible , but sometimes luke can have hours, even a whole a day sometimes where the pain hes bracing himself for doesnt come. mc always reminds luke to take his meds whenever luke gets too busy or caught up in a case. he worries at first that it’s an inconvenience to her for her to have to remember his routines for him just in case, but that worry becomes quieter as luke realizes she reminds him in the same tone as she says “good morning” or “have you had lunch yet? wanna join me?”, just this casual and loving thing thats now integrated into both their lives the team are always ready to help too in their own way. when luke gets a pain episode in hq, marius offers distraction in the form of idle chatter on (harmless) internal pax gossip while luke waits for his painkillers to dull down the stinging. when luke feels uncomfortable tingling crawling across his whole body while out with vyn, vyn subtly helps luke move from a crowded area to a quieter one where outside stimuli cant further overwhelm luke’s senses. when it’s a bad grip strength day and all luke wants to do is punch something and fuck his useless hands up even more, artem tells luke about custom silicone grips that exist for things like pens or knives or such and that they could look for some next time they go shopping. it is not perfect. but luke’s life, even with the pain, is still worth living. everybody is trying to help and eventually, luke learns how to start helping him self along with them too.

in summary: i think luke is a fighter. i do wish he had less battles to fight, but one battle that is important for him to fight is the fight to believe that he is worth living and worth joy in spite of it all

so if i had my way, i'd write him having to manage his illness for the rest of his life

and i'd also write him having a full and happy life while doing that anyway

thank you for the ask!! :'D

[ge]

can I hear more abt your trans chung myung thoughts please

.

HEHE ANYTHING FOR YOU MY ANGELS... trans chung myung is like my number one, most well loved & personal, firmest hc evur.. no matter what he is always trans to me idk..he is like the most trans character ive ever seen its sooo real to me.. ive said it once ill say it again, chung myungs lore is literally impact by his transsexualism and im the only one who sees it.. if u get it u get it... a little cw for minor transphobia out of ignorance, not prejudice..⬇️

i always imagined that chung myung knew he was trans since he was very young, like 'beginning to comprehend words and what they mean' young.. he always got angry and aggressive when his sect siblings called him young lady or samae, sajeo, etc, lashing out even at elders to the point hed get in trouble over it... i think pretty quickly everyone figured out if they just 'humoured' him, he'd get over whatever phase he was in and stop being so troublesome, so they did.. at first they began using more masculine terms and honourifics in a 'wink wink nudge' indulgent kind of way but they noticed as he got older, he started inserting himself into more male dominated spaces, even going so far as to bathe and groom himself w the other male disciples

at first it kind of set off red flags for everyone who were still under the impression chung myung was still just going through his little 'phase' but i think chung mun was the first who stepped up and actually ASKED chung myung about it.. he pulls chung myung to the side one day and asks WHY chung myung keeps doing the things he does and chung myung frowns and says because im a boy sahyung..DUH.. chung myung explains the best he can but bc he doesnt really know how to articulate himself on these matters (doesnt know any other trans people or experiences outside of his own and cant put it into words properly) and bc chung mun is cis, chung mun is still a little confused but now he understands chung myung isnt like..joking about this, or going through some sort of phase.. he seemed genuinely put out and upset when implied chung mun didnt understand him so from that day forward chung mun very firmly introduces chung myung to everyone in the sect as their littlest brother and that was pretty much that..

it probably took some people a while to wrap their head around, but because i dont want anyone in mt hua to be transphobic LOL they all understand and accept chung myung as their new baby brother pretty quickly and soon they dont even bat an eye seeing him train topless or bathe w the rest of the guys, doing other guy dominated activities, etc.. when he got older it was just normalized that one of their brothers had boobs..literally nobody gaf theyre REAL trans allies.. mount hua most PROGRESSIVE MARTIAL ARTS SECT

also majorly hc chung myung does not have any bodily dysphoria/morphia and is perfectly fine w the way he looks, especially after he gets older and starts building lots of muscle, so he never undergoes any gender affirming surgeries but he does take wuxia testosterone pills.. cuz i think the idea of wuxia magic hormone pills is hilarious and awesome

ive also put some thought into whether cho sams body would be trans or cis, because either could be interesting.. i feel like if cho sam were cis it would actually invoke body image issues and dysphoria in chung myung, having been thrust into a body so unfamiliar & alien to him than the one he spent the most time living in and caring for.. i dont really think too much in depth about this tho so my thoughts on it are pretty vague.. is cho sam cis or trans? (shrugs) up to you!

ummm *scratches ass* i cant think of anything else to say.. trans chung myung is so awesomesauce and i love projecting my own transmasc wants and desires onto him and into a world that accepts and loves him for who he is.. i have more thoughts about his relationship w tang bo and the world around them and how they view him but those are a little more personal and nuanced so i wont get into all dat.... when rotmhs gets more popular i hope trans chung myung hc blows up cuz its sooo real... something something chung myungs reincarnation into cho sam is a trans allegory

[marsbotz]

hello I keep seeing u talk ab loving skybound but I'm curious as to why u love it, and would LOVE to read a super in-depth explanation bc im kinda a skybound notliker and ik uve changed my mind on certain thigns ab this show b4, and I was hoping u cld do it again !!! :DDD /gen

YEAH. OKAY !!! sorry this is super long and rambly i already had to rewrite it once cus tumblr ate it lol... and also sorry its all basically abt jay (running away embarrassed)

first of all let me say i do think skybound is a BAD season. having the characters suddenly all be sexist out of nowhere to drive plot is stupidddd and so is having a retcon ending that makes it all redundant except for Jaya Canon Now. i think thats mostly what makes the fandom not like it. BUT. i think its sooo interesting for like so many reasons also

i think s8 is considered the darkest season which is fair. but skybound also has a crazyyy amount of dark and DEEPLY interesting things it touches on. the ninja disappearing one by one. jays birth father being his favourite actor. jay torture. jaya actually being interesting!! lets talk abt these.

having the ninja slowly be cut out of the season is GREAT for not only building tension but also being able to more deeply build upon jay and nyas characters (and their relationship). the 22 min format means that some characters (like wu and kai) are gone for AGES. which is sad for kai fans but greatttt for the season. it rlly makes u feel their absence, and some of their disappearances are scary!! zane trying to outsmart nadakhan but realising too late hes been tricked... AHH!!!

if you compare this to how they did it in s12 its a lot more impactful as theres more time for the characters to... be gone. and the videogame nature rlly does take away a lot of the tension IMO. if jays mothers had been in prime empire like planned.... it would have been a GREAT parallel i think but as it is its just kind of odd. thats another convo tho lol (altho there issss the mention of jay being adopted at the end. very interesting [it goes nowhere])

i literally think abt jay adoption arc every god damn day of my life. ill try to explain this without getting too deep into my personal sicko hcs lol. first you get a rlly nice callback to s1 w jay being ashamed of his parents and living in a junkyard only to realise how litte he cares once theyre threatened. thennn you have the whole situation at cliffs house. jay finds out the man who abandoned him at birth (possibly? we dont know details) is the actor for fritz donnegan. the same character who jay imitated and aspired to be like. and then he realises his father felt the same admiration towards jay!! and they both never knew!!!

i think this twist is what makes a lot of jays behaviour in s6.... not excusable... but understandable. jay is shown to be insecure and have weird fucking ways of coping with this (lying. lying lying all the time) and so it kinda feels natural that his way of coping with this information would be to 1. hide the fact he made wishes 2. try to imitate his father through his book and 3. Never Speak Of This Again.

speaking of that lets talk about jay being tortured. can we talk about that?? they FUCKED him up. but the most important part out of allll of it is a character trait i rarely see ppl attribute to jay even though its like... pretty consistent for him. is his willpower!! hes able to endure days of torture to the point where he can barely walk and talk at the end of it just to stop nadakhan from gaining more power

nadakhan also directly points out jays insecurities and how they make him lie to his friends... and jays able to show some of his smarts thru trying to get flintlocke to stage a mutiny! honestly the whole episode is so damn interesting it makes me SEETHE its not more talked abt LOL

i wont get into my insanely complex jaya opinions rn but i will say s6 has one of the most interesting depictions of the ship to me. nya being reluctant to date jay due to being seen simply as his girlfriend is soooo interesting and fits well w her arc of not wanting to give up her own deal w sam x to become a ninja. its just a shame they had to retroactively make everyone misogynistic to do so lolol... and the ending w jays wish Potentially forcing them together is soooo odd and kinda goes what the rest of the season was setting up for them. THIS IS MAINLY why i think ppl hate this season. cus it sets up SOOO much cool stuff and then drops it all last second

i think the things that could have saved skybound from being so hated would be

1. do the same plotpoints w nya but dont drag the ninja AND DARETH into it ..... make them supportive of her!

2. makes jays final wish have some FUCKING consequence! you could do a LOT with how he worded it to twist it badly (im a nadakhan return truther for life)

3. not dropping every single intersting character trait ever. and also not dropping the GOD DAMN ADOPTION ARCCCCCC and also not revealing jay to be so crushingly insecure he physically cannot stop himself from lying to ppl and putting on a happy mask and then turn him into a one note comic relief character. [becoming a soulless husk]

LOL i realise this sounds now like i hate skybound I DONT i just think its very flawed. BUT thats whyyyy i love it... because its so interesting! its flawed in a way like "there is soooo much i cld do w this" and not like "i dont care about any of this its so bad". w ninjago my fav parts have always been the weird icky edgy parts that are almost too much for what it is... which is a childrens lego show. ik they cld never have done most of the interesting stuff i imagine coming out of skybound and thats ok! bc i get to think abt it evilly.

heres some assorted things i love and think are fun in skybound

kai and zane banter at the repo yard

ronin capturing the ninja!! specifically him shutting down zane from the inside is super scary and cool

NINJA IN PRISON!!!!! i almost threw up when they went to jail in crystallised its so fuckign fun. SKYBOUND 2!!!

zane playing chess against nadakahn. another scary zane moment

jay trusting only cole w the truth abt his wishes (HELL YES BROTHER)

clanceeeeee <3 him being like one sided friends w jay and standing up to nadakhan at the end of it all... wahhh

NINJA REPLACEMENTS. so fucking funny i love jay and his assortment of old guys And Skylor

everytime i watch it i cant stop thinking of this ytp and it makes me cry. its not even that funny i just have watched it like 50 times

its dungeon media. this is smth i made up and only i know abt . dont worry abt it but its true

ok my brain is mush HOPE THIS MAKES. some sort of sense . bascially trying to condense 6 years of Thoughts into coherent analysis is impossible for me LOL

[sowthetide]

GREETINGS AND SALUTATIONS this is teainabowl AND IM BACK WITH MORE NONSENSE AS PROMISED. family crisis almost averted?? i havent slept in 2 days but lmao who cares. (you cant see me rn but i want you to know that im doing a happy little jump skip dance as im writing this)

BECAUSE!!!!! ok. lets talk about genderbending in fandom. i think what usually gives me the ick in those fics is they do nature vs nurture wrong??? like a lot of the time they’ll just change the NATURE of the character and use the different gender as an excuse which. idk idk it runs me the wrong way. BUT QUENN!!! shes very much still theon?? just, nurtured differently. am i making sense? i have been traumatized by some bio-essentialism bs in the past when trying to look into similar fics bc i love gender fuckery PEOPLE JUST DONT GET IT LIKE I DO (or you, appearantly hkdhhfjh i love your story it means so much to me) 

and asoiaf is SUCH a gendered world??? like it has so much untapped potential where even a single characters gender can have SO MUCH IMPACT (can you imagine if joffrey had been a girl?? or if sansa had been a boy???) 

but what originally started my spiel was the realization that jon wouldnt have gone to the nights watch if he was a girl. and. what then?? slightly horrifying tbh, and makes me wonder if one of the other character had been male (read; they had been given more agency and autonomy in their lives) what would have changed???

but back to jon, bc then i immediately thought, ok, lets backtrack a bit, who would jon even BE. bc a lot of jons character revolves around his (lack of) a relationship with catelyn, his siblings mother. but she would have a harder time avoiding him if he was a she, right?? am i making sense???? a girl isnt seen like as much of a threat to her children i thinks?? idk i love cat and jon so much a love picking apart their relationship bc bc bc ARGHhhgg yk? also i like to think of ned being haunted by lyannas carbon copy who happens to be great with swords (would he be permitted to practice swordplay??) idk

ANYWAYS no we come to the part where i tie it up to what you mentioned in your answer. bc as much as JON being a girl might change his relationship with cat, it would be much more fucked up if it were robb, me thinks. (i too am a bit guilty of using robb as an accessory to cat) but but but. are. are you seeing my vision. catelyn stark with her three daughters when ned leaves for the greyjoy rebellion. catelyn whos convinced that the reason her husband wont send his bastard away is because she cant give him any sons. in the books she calls bran her special little boy and. idk the double meaning this would give it. and bran!!! being the heir!!! hiw would that change things??? would the reception to his accident be different?? and speaking of, what about king robert and his obsession with joining his family with neds? i havent talked about how robb (robyn?) would be different in this au but i cant think hed be as pleased as sansa was? his first shown interaction with joff is him trying to curb stomp the fucker lmao. i dont think he would be likely to have a different opinion bc of gender changes. in the books hes often rash and impulsive and prideful, and id want him to keep those traits, but peoples reactions to them would be different?? and so he would shape them in different ways??? am i making sense i feel like im just rambling. this is getting way too long and wayy to incoherent i need to stop. ok bye for now ill be back (threatening)

GO TO BED!!!! GET SOME SLEEP!!!!! But yay! to family crisis averted? Maybe?

Okay. I'm gonna indulge in some haterism for a second cause I've actually poked around the ASOIAF genderbending tag quite a bit. Unfortunately, a lot of those fics? Lame as hell. There's a preponderance of genderbent Jon Snow, which I think is totally cool! Very interesting genderbend to explore because of how much it changes the trajectory of his story. But then the character isn't really written as Jon at all? Maybe I'm just picky about characterization, but oftentimes fem!Jon just becomes this cookie-cutter "strong/feisty" female protag and it's like...

Sorry. I'm being mean. Obviously, there is no singular "correct" take on a given character, as we're all influenced by our own experiences and perceptions. My take on Theon isn't the exact same as yours, or goddcoward's, or Ashen's, or GRRM's. A unique Theon exists in all our heads, each one a bit different from the others.

But! Genderbends are so much more fun when you can see the underpinnings of the character you know, and there are moments where those aspects really shine through. And it's like OH!!! (pointing vigorously) THERE THEY ARE!!!! Otherwise, why not just write an OC, or adopt a minor character with very little canon characterization? (Admittedly, this can become a problem when you start collecting minor characters like Pokemon cards. I am my own evidence of this phenomenon.) If it ain't Jon, then why have it be Jon at all, y'know?

ngl female Joffrey has been rattling around in my brain lately... 👀fem!Joffrey would definitely be betrothed to Robb, which would be a complete and utter shitshow (appreciative/affectionate). Joffrey as a true mini-Cersei has such insane juice to it as a story idea, especially considering that Joffrey never liked Cersei all that much lol... the mother-daughter dynamic would be BONKERS.

Back to Jon though:

First, you're definitely right that fem!Jon wouldn't be seen as much of a threat to her siblings as Jon was. She would probably be married off pretty quickly once she came of age, as high as possible for a woman who was bastard-born. I don't see Catelyn liking her per se, but Catelyn wouldn't have the same misgivings about her as she did about Jon. Since fem!Jon probably wouldn't become the vessel of the wildling/Others plot, she might have an interesting role to play if she went south... to marry Robert's royal bastard Edric Storm, perhaps? I could see Robert "having his Lyanna" by marrying fem!Jon and Edric. But then shit hits the fan with the usual plot of AGOT, and maybe fem!Jon gets taken hostage by the Lannisters in King's Landing? Or gets caught in Renly's shit since she was with Edric at Storm's End? I am NAWTTTT talking myself into writing another fic. Go to hell. I need to finish Sow the Tide first.

fem!Robb (Robyn between myself and goddcoward) is even crazier. Catelyn would NOT be fucking happy to have Ned's spitting image hanging around Winterfell, while all her sons are under 10 and have the Tully look. I could see Catelyn successfully arguing that Jon should be fostered out, perhaps in the Vale (as a favor on the part of Jon Arryn)? Like, oh, Ned, you and Robert became such good friends fostering together in the Vale... that way, Jon is waythefuckoverthere and can't make any allies in the north.

I'd love for Robyn to have some of the same anger and pride, and she'd probably be similar to Catelyn in that she was raised as the heir for a good bit of time before the "real" heir came along years later (Bran+Edmure). Also, Catelyn would absolutely NOT trust Theon around Robyn. Not At All. Kinda fair though? Robyn would also be older than Sansa was in AGOT, so I think she'd be at least a little bit more worldly and pick up on Joffrey's... Joffreyness. Robb/Robyn are still dutiful characters, but I think there would be a lot more immediate friction between her and her betrothed. Double genderbend Throbb is my true love, however (Quobyn my beloved).

I've gotta finally go work on chapter 40 now, so I can't answer everything, but do come back... I'll be here... revolving all of these genderbends around in my head...

[quodekash]

gosh darnnit im tired 

in other words: time for my weekly ramblings about a bl where im mildly interested in the main couple but the side couple means more to me than anything and no i will not stop talking about them 

slight warning, there will be one mention of sa and one mention of murder/suicide (both of which are my personal speculation about particular situations, and there’s no detail apart from the word being mentioned). i also discuss/ramble to myself about mental health problems, and alcohol abuse. so if any of those things are triggering for you in any way, please be cautious about reading this, take necessary precautions, and if it’s particularly distressing, i urge you to call a local hotline for these kinds of emergencies. i care about all of you and your health and safety, whether i know you or not, and if you ever need to talk about anything at all, lemme know, my ask box and my dms are always open. 

anyway, on with the show! 

if you haven’t figured it out yet, this is... 

MY THOUGHTS ON EPISODE 4 OF ABAAB 

(if youre new here, it will literally be all of my thoughts on everything while im watching it bc i feel like im annoying my friends with my ramblings so instead ill annoy all of this circle of tumblr. and it will probably not be coherent. youre welcome.) 

i’m obsessed with his little ‘cher is so cute’ smile 

THATS HOW I FEEL ABOUT LITERALLY THIS EXACT POST 

dONT YOU DARE DO A PATPRAN 

that’s real insightful, cher. id never thought of that one before. the statement really gets me thinking. 

are you- are you saying what i think you’re saying? or am i more dirty minded than i thought 

his hair is extra curly today and its veyr pretty 

the curls are giving charlie spring vibes from the side 

i would like to touch his hair please 

the fact that covid exists in this universe is weirdly funny to me 

yup that sounds about right. no one rly cares about covid anymore when the entire world is ending 

YAY HE’S FINALLY OPENING UP TO HIM 

that freaking sucks tho 

and what’s worse is it’s very likely tian was r*ped 

WHY DO ALL THE HAPPY FEEL-GOOD SHOWS HAVE TO HAVE SAD DEATH BACKSTORIES BEHIND 50% OF THE FREAKING CHARACTERS 

GUN (msp)’S DAD IS DEAD AND HIS MUM SPENDS HALF THE SHOW LOW-KEY DYING (and i swear if they do something to gim in our skyy 2 im gonna fly to thailand and have some words with people) 

AYAN’S DAD LEFT, HIS UNCLE DIED 

THUA’S DAD DIED 

HALF THE CHARACTERS IN THE ECLIPSE HAVE DIAGNOSED DEPRESSION AND THE REST OF THEM ARE UNDIAGNOSED BUT ITS DEFINITELY THERE 

HERE, JACK HAS DEPRESSION (and i rly hope they go into that more in depth later in the show bc he intrigues me. if they dont go into it more then im writing a way too in depth analysis post of jack) 

AND NOW FREAKING CHER’S FRIEND/CRUSH FROM CHILDHOOD IS FREAKING DEAD AND HER BODY WAS FLOATING IN A POND WHICH DOESNT RLY LEAD TO ANY IMMEDIATE THOUGHTS OF A NATURAL DEATH WHICH MEANS IT WAS PROBABLY MURDER AND/OR SUICIDE WHICH MAKES IT EVEN FREAKING WORSE 

i knew it was too good to last. the over-confident, cocky, funny, sassy/sarcastic people are generally the most messed up, they just hide it via humour and feigned confidence (i am most certainly not one of these people at all) 

cher stop drinking, you’re gonna hurt yourself. also the alcohol might feel like it’s lifting the burden of thinking and stops you from worrying about everything thats happening, but itll come rushing back to you when you’re sober and worse because youll have a hangover, and it’s only a temporary fix, drinking only works for a couple of hours. you need a more permanent fix, cos if you keep turning to alcohol, itll turn into addiction and substance abuse and dependency, none of which are good, all of which are much harder to get out of than they are to get into. so yeah, just chill with the drinking a little bit. i get that you need to let it all out and you need to not feel for a bit, and that’s totally okay, but you need to make sure you’re not over-indulging yourself. otherwise youll be very ill in the long-term, both physically and mentally 

PFFFT THIS WAS THE PERFECT SHOT TO END IT ON 

final thoughts: 

theyve both said things that make absolutely no sense in context unless theyre confessions of feelings, and yet theyre definitely gonna continue to do the “what if he doesnt like me back” thing even tho its SO CLEAR to LITERALLY EVERYONE they have feelings for each other 

theyve gotten so close to kissing this episode and yet they havent which is sad, but also at least they have kissed at one point before getting to the point where they COULD have kissed a grand total of siXTY-SEVEN TIMES- (shut up im not talking about tinngun what are you talking about. .....but also if you wanted to see that post where i count out all of the times tinngun didn’t kiss...) 

very sad with the complete and utter lack of threezo in this episode. actually, it’s not even a lack of threezo. neither of them even appeared in the episode. neither was even mentioned. they (i.e. the characters, the creators of the show) are all acting like threezo AREN’T the most important characters in this entire show 

i love threezo 

where is threezo 

or is it zothree

either way i dont mind bc i love them 

where was i 

oh right 

this episode was pretty good, very emotional, i definitely didnt cry what are you talking about (who am i kidding, eveyrone knows i cried three times, you dont even need me to tell you) 

im excited for episode 5 

that is all, thank you and goodnight 

[loversgothic]

Is there a particular reason you stopped making Fortnite art?

ohhhh boy. theres a few? in part its because it stopped being fulfilling and i lost interest and inspiration. its also because i cant play the game anymore because it cant run on my laptop with the new updates.

but a big one is that people are... really mean. really, really mean. people in the fortnite community overall are SOOOO NEGATIVE esp to artists. i make primarily romantic art and pinup art, and people can be incredibly unkind. ive been called slurs (both homophobic and racial), ive seen my friends get bullied for posting art in a similar vein, fuck that shit was a NIGHTMARE. fortnite possibly has the worst fandom ive ever seen, and ive been in SO MANY of them! i made mostly Jonesdation art, and while there were people who liked it, there was a lot of people who also didnt. there was some kind of weird.. looming feeling that i was afraid of posting my indulgent work (of course i always posted it anyway! im no pussy) but i dont like having that feeling loom over me. its also bc some of my friends kind of thought it was Funny when i did Foundation art since they didnt care much abt fortnite lore and thought my serious art i put all my time into was funny because of who acted Foundation. and i want my ideas to be taken seriously enough if i present them in a serious fashion.

its also because The Seven got slipped out of the story as time passed, and i really just couldnt get into the Oathbound or current groups. and even then, content with The Seven and Foundation in particular really felt like punch after punch regarding a character i became attached to (to nearly a delusional extent) with peoples perception of him becoming shittier because of a fucking comic that sucked ass. after a while it feels like people forgot abt him :( fortnite seriously moves WAYYY too fast and theres too many characters to get attached to, once your fave falls out of relevancy in story you are probably not gonna hear about them again? the only seven members i ever see ANYONE talk abt anymore is origin and that is bc im friends with the number one origin fans SBHJAHBANJA i love them i hope they have fun forever <3

something else that i think is that, i fell out of the fortnite fandom because it feels like its not a great place to explore ideas for me. when it comes to writing, i want to explore relationships, symbols, backstories, and the character i liked (Foundation) did NOT have that many people willing to explore those ideas and it made me scared to share them. Fortnite also doesnt really have a lot of... depth. it COULD have depth, sure, but you have to grasp at straws and make up half of it. it just.. wasnt fulfilling enough, i need something i can Dig into.

ill always love the Fortnite characters, and ill always love The Seven. ill always love Fiore (my foundation oc i made before he got unmasked officially) and FUCK ill always love all of the villains and Jones. but right now i need to explore something else fulfilling

here are some other small reasons:

my art has been stolen for tiktok thirst traps multiple times

i dont have a problem with being in a community with a lot of teenagers (i am a teenager. an adult one but ykno) but DAMN its a relief to be able to talk like an adult to OTHER ADULTS now that im out of there

ive also had to hide my nsfw art twitter for a variety of reasons that are complex. (one of them being that Im not trying to get bullied more)

it felt like i was fucked bc i couldnt produce relevant art fast enough to keep up with the game

[artisticmenace]

talking abt my characterrss!! read if you want im just letting it out. might be interesting yknow. if anyone really cares too much. spoilers for the comic im going to make if anyone was really wsnting to read that. probably not but just in case yk

Starting off with my two boys from Those Days(and other characters)

Scott: so he was supposed to look like this one guy i kept seeing on pinterest and also jareth the goblin king a little bit but because of the time its set in(and also the fact that his dad is initially thought to be a homophobe) he cant be as flashy. he ended up looking more like inigo montoya.... but i kept his purple crystal earing as a token of his gay witchy king design history. he himself is meant to act a little homophobic despite coming out as a bisexual late into the plot so his design fits. he does wear makeup though. smudgy eye makup done in dark eyeshadow in fact. after the gay subplot and main plot come to a collision he'll get witchier. post high-school i think he and rodney will end up getting fashionable. hes also meant to be a touch self centered. he idolizes his dad to the point he feels he cant be "soft" at all. his dad doesnt care though. he keeps this tough guy routine to the point of not being emotionally mature enough to comfort people that well. scotts fighting habits will kick him in the ass. design wise i need to change his style of clothing a little bit because i think i want this to take place in the 80s.

Rodney: rodney is based on this one guy i had a dream about, and probably all the fanart I've seen of martin from tma. he was originally going to have the same haircut as scott and be thinner, but neither of those design choices were fun, and i wanted to make a short chubby nervous guy instead. his internalized homophobic crime is "my mom is a dyke but because people think that will make me gay i cant possibly be gay because i want to be not like my mom because her gfs are all terrible and" well he might trauma dump a little after that. rodney never met his dad but because of that he had to endure lots of terrible 'stepmoms'(his mom never married them) and they would steal from her and he would get blamed and boom bam child abuse. a lot of people say he turned out better than expected, and he really hates thinking of what he could've done. despite being a great baseball player, he is relentlessly bullied for having a lesbian mom. no one knows exactly who found this out or how. he is equally as much muscle as he is fat, and he's quite strong. unfortunately, he'd rather take the hit than fight back for fear of punishment, not so much from the school but from his mom. scott eventually finds out about Rodney's constant mistreatment, and that's when he decides to let rodney stay with him a while(around their second year of knowing each other). Mr. Haverford just accepts that rodney lives there now as hes super respectful and doesnt say much.

Lucy Campbell: her design should really tell the reader where they are because shes 80s as hell. shes scotts ex. shes kind of a dumb person in general but she knows how to influence people. i dont know how or if ill ever introduce her but she does tattoos and piercings at her house which is by a convenience store named "Myrtle's". Scott goes there sometimes. he doesnt like her anymore and she doesnt like men anymore so they just sit around and smoke. sometimes they drink and talk about life.

Susie Marshall: shes a nice person. she tutors lots of kids including Scott. scott and rodney stop going to her house after scotts dad says susies dad is a really good aim and might shoot them even if they're just there to talk about school. shes pressured into a very isolated and tidy lifestyle by her parents and doesnt really enjoy living.

[glazedvsion]

literally if the sumeru plot is actually the traveler being on the side of colonization i think im gonna quit the game for real like its been one of my super long emotionally invested in interests but like cmon you could have done anything else for the plotline it didnt Have to involve any sort of colonization storyline at all hoyoverse you fucking weirdos

[a-libra-writes]

Hcs on how would Stannis/Sandor/Roose act with their toddle/baby? What if they had to take care of them for the day for one reason or another.

ok anon i know u only requested 3 characters but pls understand i am baby crazy + i wanna write for my favs i dont get to write often so pls take my emotion dump .......... ill put ur requests at the front

Stannis

He's uncomfortable about being left with a baby, but he knows you're exhausted and deserve the free time. So, he dutifully sets out to take care of this baby. Somehow.

Even if his kiddo is easy as can be, only waking up to eat and going right to sleep, Stannis is fretting. He keeps them close to his desk, but it's hard to focus on work when he keeps glancing over, anticipating something. Regardless if the child is crying or looking around or sleeping, he thinks something is off. The baby suddenly opening his eyes and smiling at him gives Stannis some comfort, though.

A toddler is much more effort. Stannis brings in the boy's favorite toys and his plush stag, but the child knows something is different today. He's wholly interested in Stannis, resulting in the stoic man having to carry the kid around while he does his rounds around Dragonstone or King's Landing. Stannis gets a bit flustered when people coo over his son and tease him about getting "stuck" with babysitting. Stannis grunts he's the father, so it's not that unreasonable, and tries to get on with his job.

He talks to his kid like a little adult, seriously explaining the things around the castle, who this person is, what that room is used for. Stannis will never "fawn" or coo over his child. Whenever the tot reaches for something of interest, Stannis brings him over to examine it.

Stannis is the type to know exactly what comforts his kiddo, so he carries that along with him. As soon as the toddler starts fussing because he's tired and overwhelmed, Stannis hands him the oversized black stag and quickly goes back to their room. If the child is displaying signs of being "different" - as in, probably neuroatypical, Stannis picks it up quickly and tries to accommodate him best as he can. This is Westeros, so he only has so much knowledge and resources, but he's more aware and considerate than others.

In the end, he didn't get much done today. When you come back, he reports all the things he and the baby did. He doesn't know why you're looking at him so softly and giving him lots of kisses, but he won't complain about it.

Sandor

Sandor grumbles and rolls his eyes, but he takes the kid. Sandor is pretty awkward with the baby, but at least he's not terrified of "breaking" it. You've already showed him how to care for her, so he knows what to do, he's just prone to fumbling and making a mess. Even if the baby is perfectly well-mannered and sleeps all day, Sandor doesn't want to leave them alone. He ends up staying in the house and doing chores in there so he's not too far off.

A toddler is much easier to care for. Sandor just straps the tot to his back and goes about his chores on your shared farm. When he stops for a break, he lets the kid out and watches them run around and play.

It's .. actually not bad. Sandor still thinks you do a better job, and figures the kid likes you more. He thinks this even as his toddler comes back with bunch of flowers and he lets her stick them in his hair. He answers whatever questions and babbling she has with his usual sass and... colorful language, and gods know she gets away with a lot. By the end of the day, she's got a big ouchie on her leg, a stomach full of berries she foraged and her hair is covered in leaves and twigs. She won't stop happily babbling about the fun day she had with her father, though.

When he brings her into town, everyone is cooing over the cute baby and the big, gruff man she's tied to. Sandor tries to get away from the townspeople, but he so rarely visits without you, and he's a bit of a mysterious, scary figure... made totally unintimidating by the giggling kid he's got strapped to his chest.

... That's if you find them awake! When you get home, Sandor and your kiddo are probably passed out by the hearth. It's adorable. When he wakes up, Sandor grumbles about you leaving him alone with the kid, even as she's passed out on him and he's still cradling her. Yeah okay buddy.

Roose

He's annoyed, because there's clearly a nurse who can take care of the babe, but he also picks his battles with you. If you're sleep deprived, pissed off and in clear need of a break, he'll do it.

Which is to say, Roose simply has the bassinet moved to his office. He keeps the babe close at hand while he catches up on some work and letters. He's definitely not the sort to walk around the Dreadfort with a child in his arms. When the baby needs something, he takes care of it. There's little smiling or warmth here. It's easy if the baby just sleeps most of the time. If it's awake and becomes more distressed at being ignored, Roose begrudgingly holds it while continuing his writing.

For a toddler, he's still not going to cart them around the Dreadfort, nor will he just let them go off and play. So, he does the same thing - A day with dad means Roose sitting at his desk and some toys being strewn about the room for the kiddo to play with.

Naturally, a toddler will get bored from this arrangement. So Roose will allow them up on his knee and will answer whatever silly questions they have. This might be the only time his kid will be in his lap - he definitely won't indulge them when they're older and "should know better".

Yeah, he's not a terribly affectionate father. Though he's interested if the child is clearly intelligent, like if they're trying to talk to him, figure out what he's doing, or they're incredibly absorbed in whatever toy they have. Roose is more willing to indulge their curiosity, especially if this is his heir.

When you're ready to take your child back, you can definitely give Roose a talking to about being so cold. A young one needs love and warmth, but you're talking to a man who had neither when he was growing up. Honestly, he's better at the whole parenting thing when you're around. It's hard for Roose to remain distant and impassive when you're snuggling and praising his heir. He won't ever admit to it, but watching you both gives him a very warm feeling.

Ned

He's more than pleased to take over the childcare for today - Ned knows you need a break, and he's done it before. If your child is still a babe, Ned doesn't want to be away from them for too long. He brings them into his office, refuses visitors for the day and tries to catch up on some paperwork while constantly getting distracted by every coo he hears. When the baby needs something, Ned easily takes care of them and keeps them in his arms for a while longer, even if it makes writing awkward.

He's pleased whenever Robb, Jon or any of the other children come by to peek at the baby. It's doubtful they'll pay attention for that long, but Ned thinks it's important they ought to say hello to their new sibling.

A toddler whose moving around and more active means Ned can can them with him while he's going about his duties. He gladly brings the tot around Winterfell as he speaks to men and visits with a lord or two. He's a bit shy when they comment on how much the child looks like him - or the praise about having a son, and polite comments on having a daughter. Once all that is done with, he can finally show the child around Winterfell and watch their eyes light up as they look at the tall towers and huge walls.

Once the child is (finally) tired, Ned quietly brings them back inside. If the other young ones (Arya/Bran/Rickon etc) he tucks them in together. Help, he's dying from domestic happiness. Ned didn't think he'd have such a family.

Jorah

Jorah is more than happy to take the kiddo off your hands for a day - if he's the father, this is already something he's done several times. If the child isn't his, he's honored that you trust him so much! He promises to protect the baby and take good care of them. You probably aren't thinking about it that seriously, but his heart is in the right place.

He loves holding your kiddo and smiling and talking to them while he (attempts to) get things done. Eventually he just ties the baby to his chest like he's seen some Essosi women do. Jorah is the sort to respond to every babble they have, talking to them but moreso to himself. He wouldn't carry the baby everywhere if it was a fussy or sensitive type, though.

He's probably a little too coddling for a baby - some more affectionate kids might like it, but more stand-offish babies might be bothered by his constant holding. At least Jorah gets the memo and puts them down when they're fussing. When the baby is in their bassinet, he hangs up some pretty charms for good health and long life the Dothraki women made. Anytime he finds a new one, he ties it up.

With all his patience, Jorah is excellent at caring for a toddler. He knows to bring a toy they like and keeps them up on his shoulders while he walks around the markets, showing them the different sights. He tells the child lots of new words, even if they won't remember it all. Maybe something will stick. When your kiddo starts getting sleepy and fussy, Jorah ties them on his back like he did when they were a babe.

He really can't resist buying a toy or soft blanket the kiddo points at... It's just one! It's not like he does this all the time - well, last time was only a week ago. And Jorah was by himself. So it doesn't count.

When you come back, your kiddo is exhausted and fast sleep, but Jorah is beaming. He had a great time and he volunteers himself anytime you need a break from the toddler. If you both are together, he wants lots of snuggles because he's just so full of love. He had a great day and he's so lucky to have you and your child.

Victarion

... You want him to do what?

Even after you've handed him the baby, given him instructions and walked off, Victarion still stands there. Holding it. Looking at it. Even when this is his child too, and even after you've given him direction, he's stumped. You... want him to look after the babe? You actually think he can? ... Isn't there a thrall that can do this job?

He tries to pawn the baby off to Yara, who just laughs in his face and tells him to figure it out. If he's truly hopeless, she might lend a hand, but it's his damn kid. You should've made him look after her a while ago.

Normally a rough man, Victarion holds the baby like she's made of nothing but glass. He doesn't want to admit to himself how scared he is of dropping her or squeezing her too hard. A toddler is somewhat easier as she would actually like getting scooped up - a baby doesn't not appreciate that sudden movement.

Having no idea what's an appropriate activity for a toddler, the Ironborn would just lift the toddler by her collar, put her on his shoulder and go off. He'd train his men and bark orders while your daughter sat on his shoulder, watching everything with interest. Occasionally pulling at his long hair, and then he'd tell her to stop. Like... she's understands what he's saying. At some point he handed her an old knife to distract her. It's shiny. And it's dull. She'll be fine. If she cuts herself, it'll be an important lesson.

When she (weakly) throws it at someone, he finally laughs and gives it back to her. This is the first laugh/smile your little one has gotten from Victarion, so hell yeah she's gonna throw it again.

You're surprised by the good mood Victarion is in when he gives your baby back. And she's giggling, too, and she's in one piece. Well, that's surprising. It isn't until days later when you hear about how he let her have some ale, gave her a small training axe, set her on the bow of a ship to show her the ocean ...

Arianne

Babysitting duty! You apologize to Arianne and tell her she really doesn't have to, but she wants to. By this point she has quite a crush on you, and your kid is adorable, so this is a win-win. She gets your favor and she gets to carry around a cute little tot.

It can't be that hard, right? The babe is always so well-behaved with you. If it's a baby, she might actually be kind of bored... He mostly just sleeps in his bassinet, and sometimes she has to get up to feed him or listen to him babble. ... I mean, she should be grateful, but... You always look so cute cooing over him, maybe he just doesn't like her ...

But when you get back, you're beaming and thanking her, telling her he's so happy. Well, if you say so!

Arianne more engaged with a toddler. She'll gladly take him around Sunspear, showing him the shiny armor of the guards, the beautiful tapestries hanging from the walls, the big lion skin rug in her favorite parlor. She loves how much his eyes brighten and he babbles and points. He's so much like you, she's dying from cuteness.

Admittedly, she panics a bit when he starts scrunching up his face and fussing. She's had experience with young ones, but her mind draws a blank as she tries to soothe him. She remembers that babies can get overwhelmed, so she takes him to a quiet room until he's calm. There, this isn't so hard. But then he starts asking for his mama and getting upset that she's not there...

By the time you return, Arianne is relieved. She had fun, but she's exhausted. And her ears are sore from him yanking on her earrings.

Brynden

It's not like you ask for this favor often, so Brynden is willing to help you out. Especially if you're a widow, he really can't turn you down. He tells you to take your time, he's familiar with children.

And he is! Brynden isn't worried about holding a babe wrong or dealing with a toddler's endless questions. He was basically a second parent to his nieces and nephew when Minisa passed, and he easily reverts back to caretaking.

While most men would grumble about a baby or hold it improperly, Brynden calmly carries her around, takes care of her when she needs something, and goes back to whatever he was doing. He doesn't forget to smile at her and talk to her about this or that. He has such a gentle way of speaking to children.

A toddler is definitely interesting. Brynden will put her on his shoulders and take her to see the horses, the knights training, the people going in and out of the feast hall. He talks to his men as if there isn't a child pulling at his ears. If something gets her attention, Brynden will take the girl there and explain to her what she's looking at. She doesn't understand now, but she will later.

If the children was his own, Brynden might be a little shyer about showing her off to everyone. He'd still walk her around the Eyrie, but when there's less people. He just spent so long going on about how he'd never marry or have kids, and now look at him.

When it's time to pick your little one up, Brynden clearly had a fun day. He's usually busy with guarding the Bloody Gate or the Eyrie, but the old knight will absolutely help you out again if he can.

Yara

Noooooooo. She can't hide her grimace when you hand her the baby. Yara will do the babysitting, because she knows you're exhausted and you deserve it, and she doesn't want to toss the kid off on some thrall... But what does she know about babies? She's made a point to not have any, and avoid caring for them. This kid is lucky he's your's.

She's positive the Drowned God cares little for babes and whether they cry or not, but Yara is thanking him anyway when your baby just sleeps through most of the day. All she's had to do is feed him and change him a few times. She knows he's not always like that, so maybe the little bastard decided to be nice to Aunty Yara. Isn't she lucky?

If he's crying and fussing, well ... Yara will get through it, but when you're back, she hands him back with an exhausted sigh. She is never having children.

A toddler is both easier to manage and a little harder. On one hand, the tot is always running off and wanting to mess with everything. Yara talks to him like a person, not bothering with the babytalk, because she knows he actually listens. When he tries to pick up something he shouldn't have, she tries to replace it with a toy or ... a cool looking stick. A smooth rock. Anything.

He can be pretty funny, though. When she's carrying him around and people try to give her shit, she just points at them and your son launches his rock right at them. She gives him an approving kiss on the forehead and hands him more. When he repeats something he heard her sailors say, he says it with such enthusiasm she can't help but laugh. (At least she's not giving him weapons or alcohol, Victarion)

When she gives your toddler back, she's less tired, a little more amused, but still pretty over it. Yara is better with older kids; the ones that are still crying and using diapers are a bit too much. She prefers when it's the three of you together.

[simkjrs]

How about Kusuke for that ask meme? Would love to hear more of your thoughts on that little freak 😊

favorite thing about them

im kind of obsessed with his misanthropic mad scientist ways. theres nothing funnier about kuusuke than his complete lack of consideration for the happiness or quality of life for the rest of the human race. just look at him <3

least favorite thing about them

i hate all the incest jokes baked into his character. asou shuuichi had a perfectly interesting and compelling guy without that so why did he have to ruin it.

aside from that i think its really sad when he regularly invades saiki's privacy & bodily autonomy (such as adding a trigger to saiki's second limiter device without telling him. someone introduce kuusuke to the concept of informed consent please). i do think that this is one of the most interesting points of conflict between him and saiki tho so i wish asou shuuichi did something more with it where saiki gets a character arc learning how to assert his boundaries after living his whole life unable to respect others boundaries (due to x ray and mindreading) and without others respecting his (see: his dad and kuusuke)

favorite line

brOTP

i <3 saiki and kuusukes fucked beyond all repair brothers relationship i love how they care about each other but this fixes nothing and makes everything worse. its so interesting how they shaped each other growing up, and how despite resenting each other they also give each other things they cant get from anyone else -- kuusuke finding a "playmate" who can challenge him and stimulate his creativity, kusuo having someone he can rely on when it comes down to a crisis (such as his limiter breaking or needing to find a way to stop japan from being destroyed by a super volcano explosion).

of course, the fact that kuusuke cant be relied on in any other circumstance is also what makes the relationship interesting i think. like if kuusuke isn't helping saiki fix a problem, then he's the one causing all of saiki's problems. i really wish that we got more exploring their relationship.

that said it's really hard to enjoy them whole heartedly when all the incest jokes keep sneaking in. sorry i keep bringing this up but i really do hate them so much. like either commit to the incest/harrassment plotline and do your best to thoughtfully & respectfully portray the consequences of that trauma, or just leave it out. dont make it into a joke LOL ... literally why does anyone ever think this is funny

OTP

kuusuke x his pure & innocent disregard for humanity <3

nOTP

i see people shipping him with teruhashi makoto sometimes and its like ... why ... would you think that putting two creeps together would fix anything about them. they wouldnt make each other worse in a fun or interesting way. and they wouldnt even be funny

random headcanon

i think that kuusuke stopped resenting saiki shortly after he left home to go to cambridge because suddenly he was the smartest most genius most admired person in the room again but it was so boring because no one could challenge him and there was nothing to surpass. since life felt very boring & meaningless like this, i think that made him reevaluate his relationship with his brother and he realized that as much as it frustrated him to lose it made him happy to have a goal to always strive for. so i think after that, his ill will towards saiki mostly disappeared ... though he still has deadly serious competitive intent.

that said i think saiki never realized kuusuke's change of heart because kuusuke invented the telepathy canceler. and i think kuusuke wasnt interested in correcting saiki about how he felt now, and i think kuusuke didnt give much (if any) consideration to how it would make saiki feel to keep living under the misconception that his brother still hated him but had simply found a way to hide his plotting, forever. in conclusion: kuusuke is kind of the worst. LOL

unpopular opinion

ive already said all my unpopular opinions. my extremely niche opinion is that if saiki kuusuke and enoshima junko were born into the same world they would perfectly cancel each other out because what they both wanted was to fulfill their boredom and what they both did to do that was raise the stakes on other people until they managed to stop them (or didnt). kuusuke and junko would become perfect rivals. they would be like bbc sherlock and moriarty if they were high schoolers. they would be like L and light if L was completely amoral and just devote to winning the case for the sake of winning, and light was also completely amoral and just killing people to see what would happen. and they would be exactly like this post

song i associate with them

HMM i don't really have one. if i had to pick one... primadonna by marina. LOL

favorite picture of them

i cant pick one so you get three.

[shayminsh]

*bonks u with LISTENING TO YOU TALK ABOUT YOUR INTERESTS YOUVE GOT VERY GOOD INTERESTS (and cardboard tube)*

ANON ILY I SAW THIS AND I WAS LIKE "hmm i think ill save this for when i want to ramble about my interests since rn i cant think of ANY of my varied and many interests" AND THEN LIKE JUST NOW I WAS THINKING HMMMM I WANNA TALK ABOUT OKAMI BUT WHERE DO I DO THAT so now youre stuck here listening to me talk about issun!

dont click unless youre ready to scroll. a bunch.

issun,,,, thoughts. ough. waugh. woahoogjhoo. he's a punk. he has authority issues. probably an inferiority complex that he shoves deep deep down. He's been raised to become a celestial envoy. that's who he's going to be. shaped and molded into an artist from birth.

He tries, he improves, but he never gets the recognition he wants, the recognition he craves. His confidence tells him he deserves it, his confidence shows that he doesnt have to be STUCK doing this his whole life. I feel like being stuck is something Issun fears alot, actually. He needs to be free. He wants change when things arent going his way. He wants to be respected! He wants people to STOP CALLING HIM A BUG.

His entire character just- ough. The CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT. MAN. The first two acts he's crass. He's immature. He's demanding. But he doesn't notice, or else he doesnt care. Because journeying with Ammy, even if its scary sometimes, even if times are uncertain, he feels free. Is this what being a Celestial Envoy is? Maybe it's not so bad.

He's still hiding from that destiny, mind you. Its more of a feeling that he can't name, won't name. Waka prods him about it, and it Pisses. Issun. Off. Can't he escape that? He left Ponc'tan for a reason! Why is it still plaguing him?

When Ammy visits Ponc'tan, Issun refuses to go in. And I got to wonder what's going on while she's in there. (Asides from the hilarious mental image of him sitting on a mushroom arms crossed just pouting) Is he guilty? Angry? Scared? I think it's a mixture of all of three, tbh. He's so so resentful of- is it Ishaku? Is it himself? Is he angry that he couldn't just wait to find his destiny as an envoy? He had to go find it himself? Then he was RIGHT! He's RIGHT and Grandfather is WRONG.

I know i'm skipping a bit but they find the arc of yamato and just. JUST. FUCKING. ISSUN TRIES TO SEPARATE HIMSELF. AMMY'S GOING ON TO FINISH HER DESTINY AND HE'S NOT COMING WITH. I HAVE SO MANY FUCKING FEELINGS ABOUT THIS SCENE BUT I NEED TO PLAY IT AGAIN BEFORE I TALK ABOUT IT JUST IN CASE I GET IT WRONG

Issun's goodbye breaks my fucking heart. He's resigned to not seeing her again. It's like all this time he's been growing closer and closer to who he's meant to be, and now he's backing away. He doesn't want a stiff goodbye, he doesn't want an emotional one. He wants Ammy to STOP looking so sad. What does she care, anyway? She needs to go to BRUSH GOD things! EPIC WORLD SAVING THINGS!!

Waka shows up and. BITCH WHY SO INSENSITIVE??? YOU COULDVE BEEN SO MUCH NICER. But also I think Issun really needed to hear someone say that he had to face facts, you know?

Waka prods him, Issun gets angry, he tries to enter the arc anyways. I GOT SO EXCITED SEEING THIS PART WE GET TO KEEP THE BELOVED BUT THEN BAM. A barrier forms and Issun is repelled. He falls back against the dissolving bridge. Issun falls into the cold lake as Waka leads Ammy into the arc.

What was he thinking while the arc closed? While his best friend Ammy disappeared to go to important- life threatening things- without HIM? I think he had a severe case of fomo for a minute there, but he stomped it down. It's not like- its not like this is HIS problem. What does he care anyways?

......no. He does care.

THIS IS THE PART. THE PART WHERE HE ACCEPTS THE SIDE OF HIMSELF THAT HES BEEN BEATING BACK WITH HIS LITTLE BRUSH SWORD FOR AS LONG AS HE CAN. IT ALL COMES CRASHING DOWN ON HIM. HE THINKS MAYBE THAT DUNK IN THE ICY WATER DID HIM SOME GOOD. HE STARTS TO DOGGY PADDLE TO SHORE.

THE PLAN FORMS IN HIS MIND. I- FUCK I NEED TOSTOP TYPING IN CAPS

The plan forms in his mind all at once. What if the reason he was hiding so long is that he didn't know HOW to do what he was trying to do? Now he knows. He feels it in his very being. He needs a scroll and some ink.

FUCKING. DUCKING FUCK HELL. IM. GENUINELY TEARING UP MAYBE ITS THE FACT THAT IM LISTENING TO RESET BUT-

Issun has to move fast. He doesn't know when, he doesnt know HOW he's so certain of this but- Ammy needs him. Ammy NEEDS a celestial envoy, and isn't it selfish of him to deny her one? Who's a better candidate, after all!!

Susano, Kushi, Oki, everyone they know, everyone they barely met. He meets with them all. He MAKES them listen, he MAKES them see. Don't you remember that white wolf that came through a while ago? She made you a drying pole, she saved your dog. She saved and defeated the water dragon. She ate all of your food, she won your race. Don't you remember? She's a god, silly! See her here? She's in trouble. I need you to believe in her, so that the sun can shine on us again.

FUCKING. TEARS IN MY EYES.

I like to think that Issun knew the whole time how much that saved Ammy's life. Powerless, facing the stupid fucking evil discount mike wazowski orb and missing her friend. I like to think that Ammy felt the warmth of the sun, too. I mean yeah she IS the sun but- all of those souls thanking her and believing in her? I like to think that it flooded her body with a determined burn that woke her up, spread through her veins and made her seethe with a power to dispense some Divine Retribution.

..

I think that after everything is all said and done, Issun feels ten times lighter. Not only because the world is saved and Ammy victorious, but because he did it. He became what he had to become, what he was so afraid of. He conquered his fear. Would Ishaku be proud now? You fucking BET!

ough,,,, i just,, i have so many feelings over him and i would write more of them out if i didnt just write a THOUSAND FUCKING WORDS OVER THIS PINT SIZED LIL SHIT

anyways bows impressively and remember you asked for this <3

[probably-haven]

Hello!! After seeing what you wrote about xiaoven fics I went to see what things you usually write and omg, your archon Venti headcanons????? I am absolutely in love. So if it isn't annoying, could you talk about xiaoven or Venti or Xiao or whatever ship or character you like? I don't care what you are going to say, I just want to know more about your thoughts ^^

I- is this... bestie, this is essentially a free ramble pass- kerujsgheskdfug. Trust me when I say that in no way is this, and in no way will it ever be annoying in the slightest- i literally- lets just say rambling off thoughts is kind of my specialty, especially when provided a topic to branch off of because otherwise I'm just- really indecisive about it so- iujskdh yeah- 100% definitely down to talk about Venti, Xiao, and/or Xiaoven XD. Also, yes- it may have been awhile since i last posted one(cuz again, indecisive about which direction to take part 5), but the Archon War Era Venti headcanons are still without a doubt my favorite posts I've made. It's just such an interesting topic with such endless potential that so few people actually think about or consider or even realize is there, so i always just get really psyched whenever i see someone interact with them lol.

.... this ended up being a bit of a mess: warning in advance

Anyway! onto the actual content!

- You see the thing about Xiaoven is that there's a lot of different ways that it could end up working out, and just personally my favorite way of portraying Xiaoven in my mind is as an unlabeled relationship because if anyone in genshin would give off that vibe its these two. And a number of other reasons.

- Firstly, I heavily headcanon Venti as being an aroace polyplatonic or perhaps heavily demiromantic. However, regardless of this I just don't think that Venti is really the kind of person to worry about how he should label his feelings, thinking it's silly to try to put them in one box or the other, especially with feelings and emotions being as fluid as they are in general. Plus it fits his whole God of Freedom vibe. I just- dont think he's the biggest fan of labels or social categorization in general.

- And secondly on the hand of Xiao... his defense mechanisms are very much ingrained in his personality. It's probably hard enough for him to not go into fight or flight(the answer is fight) at the slightest affection at first, at the slightest feeling of vulnerability. Even further down the line, with his fierce dedication to Liyue, I cant help but get the vibe that the moment he recognized that he was falling for Venti he would begin avoiding him, not only to avoid distraction from his duty, but to avoid corrupting him or losing him in general like he has with like basically every other person he gets close with(even believing that the cycle had repeated once more when he first heard of Morax's death)... now imagine Venti tryna slap a label on their relationship and tell me Xiao would have a positive reaction.

- The thing with Xiaoven.... honestly, i feel like theres more ways that it can go wrong than it can go right, but if they do manage to make their relationship work out, it's just simply beautiful in all terms of the word.

- Lets talk about killing. - During the Archon War, both were forced to kill a large number of people and gods alike- Venti out of a need to remain alive to protect Mondstadt, it's freedom, and the nameless bard's legacy by extent- and Xiao out of servitude to the god that was once his master

..... actually- break here- ive talked a lot about Venti on this blog but I havent actually spoken about Xiao all that much- so i should probably do that a bit first... do note though that my characterization of Xiao is pretty flexible actually- this is just- the possible characterization of him that i tend to favor as being the most- uh- "realistically complex"

-

Theres a line I saw this one time in a certain story: "He is a trained weapon. That's what he is, was, and always will be. You cannot change that so stop trying." And i just- think its a really interesting concept- that applies pretty well to Xiao now that i actually think about it. - the concept behind it is this: After spending more than a vast majority of his life killing or otherwise in battle, it's become a part of who he is, a normalcy that after centuries and centuries would be near impossible to get rid of or reverse, and even if it was possible, with his karmic debt constantly eating away at him its unlikely he has enough time left for that to happen. - it sounds like a cruel thing to say about him- but in context it's actually pretty layered and i think about it a lot. It's not as much a "he's a killer lol, that his whole personality" its more of a "The centuries of trauma he experienced have conditioned him into a constantly alert and battle ready mindset while also shaping his dehumanizing inferior-in-worth-but-superior-in-capability view of himself that would have likely been necessary to get through those time, and at this point he's been under that conditioning for long enough that it's essentially ingrained itself in his personality."

- the main idea is- it's a part of who he is, that needs to be accepted as who he is because its not something that he can just up and change. It's not all he is of course but his constant battle mode, as though always waiting to be ambushed or to be granted a new target to eradicate.

a couple character story quotes:

-"His past of service under the evil god had rid Xiao of his innocence and gentleness. All that remained within him was the means to kill and the weight of his sins. The only way he could be of service to mortals was in combat." -"Xiao does not feel any hatred. Having lived for over two thousand years, no single karmic debt constitutes anything more than a fleeting memory. No grudge can last a thousand years; nor is any debt so great that it cannot be paid off in this time. Xiao has spent many long years alone. But his battles have never been in vain." -"where did Xiao have to return to? He was merely leaving the battlefield." -"since Xiao wages a constant war against dark forces powerful enough to devour Liyue in its entirety, any bystanders who witness him in the heat of battle are likely to end up as collateral damage." -"The war he fights can never be won, and will never come to an end." -"Because ultimately, the one with whom Xiao wrestles is himself."

i feel like at some point this very nearly did consume his whole personality, almost turning him into nothing more than a being of slaughter under Morax's control, devoid of any "humanity" at all, consumed and corrupted by his karmic debt like his fellow yakshas before him. - until he experienced a moment of clarity- a song in the wind, the peaceful melody of a dihua flute. - and pulled back from the border of something he wouldnt have been able to return from, there a was a shift in his mind- a concept grown unfamiliar enough with time that it took him a great time to identify what it was; a curiosity. Something that there was no place for on the battlefield, something that by all means should have been completely useless to Xiao, and yet he held onto that curiosity, slowly regaining over time, a sense of who he was and who he could choose to be with each song that the wind chose to carry towards him every once in a blue moon.

and eventually that curiousity turned to longing. Longing "for a day to come when he will wear the mask and dance — not to conquer demons, but to the tune of that flute amid a sea of flowers"

...... uh- heh- if you couldn’t tell already i have a tendency to make my characterizations/analyses of characters more serious that i probably should. 

to summarize: Xiao is constantly toeing the line between his ingrained nature and his humanity- almost as though still trying to decide how much of that humanity he deserves to have, how much he is allowed to have, and how much is safe to have.

^looking back after writing this, i think the best way to explain it is that this is the view that i keep in mind/the lense that i tend to most enjoy looking through and refering back to while examining and/or analyzing his character, actions, story, lines, and overall personality.

idk- i kinda got off track but i just think its a really interesting interpretation to think about because it has some really interesting implications ig- it’s not the full extent of how i view him of course, but i kinda got ahead of myself and its long enough as is so ill just elaborate as i go- Lol i actually have in progress playlists for both him and venti and just- vibes- i could ramble about the playlists alone for hours explaining everything... It’s probably a problem- uh- ill keep going now lol.

anyways! stepping off the angst path for a brief break! Brought to you by their lines in the snow: both waiting for it to get thick enough, Venti for the purpose of a snowball fight and Xiao for the purpose of a tasty and nutritious breakfast.

but its actually something of note that Xiao doesnt actually need to eat so anything he does eat is usually out of obligation or enjoyment- so like.... snow.... like i dont blame him, but of all things- an adeptus who refuses to eat basically anything but almond tofu looks at the freezing-cold-floor-water that yeeted itself from above and decided at some point- damn- that seems more edible than basically ever single actually edible thing ever.... im gonna eat it- like- im glad if eating snow makes him happy but- at the same time...

He probably convinces Venti to eat snow too though and Venti wouldnt even resist I mean he’s wind and has probably consumed worse things in his time so- 2 anemo cryptids with glowing tattoos sitting in Dragonspine monching snow in the dead of night is an amusing thought to me.

- kay, now back to more serious-toned thoughts

One of the things about the ship that i really like is the different contradicting parallels between them:

A lot of how i view Xiao’s character is someone formed largely by the things he cant control and who was forced to accept that accepted that and learned to thrive in it as much as he can.  Venti on the other hand is surrounded by things he cant control and is ever adapting to control as much as he can while embracing whatever he cant as being part of the unpredictability of the world, seeing beauty in it. 

both of them have lost people and do what they do to honor their memory: Xiao continues to do what the Yakshas once did And Venti chooses to do what his friend couldn’t

Xiao’s power coming from himself  and Venti’s from others And both seem to appear to use their power for their own gain while truly helping others behind the scenes

both have killed a lot of people during the archon war Xiao views it as another necessary event out of his control and Venti would likely view it as a tragedy he chose to enact himself

and this is where we meet out balance

Xiao- contrary to how i think a lot of people view him as thinking of himself as a monster- seems canonically to have accepted this as part of his duty, as long as those he killed are not mortals. I dont think he enjoys it no- but someone has to do it and he’s just accepted that its a part of his duty Venti on the other hand-

See the beauty of the ship- as someone with an angst-centric mind- is this- these are two of the most traumatized mfers in the game 

Xiao is by far the one who needs the most help and who can serve to benefit most from the ship- but he is nowhere near self aware enough to recognize that there’s anything wrong or unhealthy about his mindset in the slightest-

whereas you have the contrast with Venti who sorted through most of his trauma with the nameless bard alone during the archon war and while the result appears more healthy- is still really not- but he’s not self aware of that either because i mean- who’s going to tell him? nobody even knows. 

however- venti is aware enough to notice flaws in Xiao’s mindset and “Venti” enough to want to help them through it-

Xiao- while not aware enough to recognize the flaws in Venti’s mindset, can recognize where it contrasts with his own, and is blunt enough to point it out- and then it’s out there to be mulled over- 

they’re so similar and yet so different and a feel just conversing between the two of them, being in each others precense, just being exposed to two mindsets that are so very different could do both of them a whole lot of good.

GEEE THAT BIT OF RAMBLING HAD LITTLE TO NO DIRECTION AT ALL- LET ME-- LET ME MAKE THIS START MAKING SENSE- WITH... DYNAMICS OR SOMETHING

I don’t think Xiao needs to sleep really- and i dont think that sleeping would do anything except make him uneasy at first- he’d probably just get nightmares after all he’s been through- but with Venti he would soon learn that it doesn’t have to be that way, lulled into the first peaceful sleep he’s had in... as long as he can remember.

anywho back to not making sense cuz im fickle and i think most questions about ships are best displayed through character interactions so like- a possible exchange thats cliche but cliches exist for a reason

Xiao: Why do you try so hard to help me, it isn’t easy. I know that much Venti, with the most adoring expression: Because you’re worth it, obviously Xiao: But surely there are others more deserving of- Venti: No Xiao, everyone is just as deserving as the next person, you included Xiao: Then why me above others? Venti: ehe, cuz ur my warrior of course [O//////O oh shit, hes right] Xiao: My contract is with Morax alone [gay panic but in broody yaksha]

it’s kinda difficult cuz neither of them really address their feelings.  I mean Venti does but he does it very indirectly and its rare that he ever does it with like- genuine directness- even spilling his backstory was in the form of a song- and told in the third person- so a lot of their interactions would often have some deeper meaning, especially with Venti being the bard he is. 

I come up with a lot of- errant thoughts about Xiaoven- but this is making me realize that a true analysis of their ship is rather difficult because it just encompasses so many dynamics so its hard to settle on just one and not go rambling about who knows what bouncing from one end of the ship to the other-  Because you truly can and thats the beauty of it

within one moment you can be having a heartfelt conversation about the archon war the impact of lost friends and times past, and the next moment Venti is trying to forcefeed Xiao an apple while Xiao screams about disrespecting the adepti and its just- so lovely

so while they have picnics with nothing but apples, dandelion wine, and almond tofu they can sit down and talk about the dreams Xiao once devoured, and the dandelion wine and apple cider that the first Ragnvindir invented from the plants that never could have grown in Old Mond. The foods that tasted of familiarity, or of the grilled ticker fish Pervases always used to eat, foods that tasted of friends and frankly family that had since passed, glaze lilies and cecilias and qingxin flowers scattered in the surroundings and woven into Xiao’s neat braids and Venti’s now messy ones, rebraided by the steady and inexperienced hands of one unused to gentle action. 

and then of course Venti steals Xiao’s tofu once the mood becomes too grim and replaces it with a bottle of wine that Xiao refers to as “vile poison,” a remark that fatally wounds Venti as he collapses on the floor, proclaiming how he can only be healed by a Yaksha’s kiss. Xiao ignores this of course and simply takes back his tofu with a slight smile on his face, but as Venti persists he soundlessly places a kiss on his own palm before intertwining their fingers and pulling him back up from where he was dramatically sprawled on the floor, grumbling about how such action was “unbecoming of an archon.” A sign of affection only Xiao would ever know about. But Venti is literally wind and I hc his senses work differently anyways so he definitely knows- plus Xiao’s face is red as the blood of his enemies and the way he is pointedly not looking at Venti at all really speaks volumes anyways. 

 -Venti playing epic battle music whenever Xiao goes into fights in what looks like a ridiculously extra performance to anyone else but is actually doing wonders to keep Xiao’s karma at bay

-Venti preaches the practice of “kissing wounds better” and Xiao is unfamiliar with this medical treatment but views it as unnecessary regardless because adepti have accelerated healing, doesn’t mean he’s going to stop him though. 

-Messages whispered on the wind

-Venti’s 1000 year sleep- an accident, not a fun time for the yaksha, and not a fun time for Venti once he woke up. Venti is actually more afraid of restful sleep than Xiao is, hence the sleeping in trees thing, but when Xiao is there, he can sleep restfully with faith that Xiao wont let another millennia slip through his fingertips. 

- Xiao tends to make excuses when doing things that aren’t necessary to his duty, like in his birthday voice line “Have this, it’s a butterfly i made from leaves... Okay. Take it. It’s an adepti amulet -- it staves off evil” because at the current point in his progress it helps him to feel like he’s allowed to do these things. Not wanting to put him off from progress, Venti never comments on his excuse but never fails to whisper a quick reminder of how proud he is of how far Xiao had come.

- Xiao’s karma saddens Venti greatly- not only because of how it effects Xiao but also because its a reminder that as much as Venti tries to honor the memory of those he’s killed, there will always be those who resent him for it, and when he took the option of living away from them, he truly can’t blame them. - And when he gets too wrapped up in thoughts, whether around this topic or similar ones or otherwise, eventually, he’ll hear the sound of a flute on the wind. It’s not divine by any means, but as his own wind connects him to the source, he gets the sentiment all the same. “What impact does one individual’s remaining wrath have on the present. You have done much to help the living in the present” the unspoken idea that Xiao has included himself in that statement, because now, with Venti’s help he’s beginning to learn just how to experience living for himself. 

- Venti’s form and Xiao’s mask are off limit topics though because if either mentions it the other will counter with the opposite and the mood will turn immediately bitter at the idea that both know that what they’re doing is destructive but neither are willing to change

- Venti who has different tells for negative feelings than most people because as much as he likes to pretend it is- this form isnt his, and Xiao who is able to identify those

- many fanfics and headcanons have Venti recognizing when Xiao is uncomfortable and getting him out of those situations. I see that and I love it but i raise you: - Venti taking Xiao to Mondstadt, careful that he doesn’t get to the point that he’s uncomfortable. And nothing goes wrong exactly, but Xiao notices the the way Venti’s cape is blowing in the wind, the way he’s holding his weight, barely on his feet so much as floating on the wind, connected with the ground only for the sake of appearance, all the while he looks just as happy go lucky as ever. And without a word, he grabs his hand and teleports them both out of Mondstadt.  - turns out it was just a slight thing that reminded him of the archon war (cuz i will die on the hill of him having more tragic backstory than just Decarabian), and he of course gives a sincere if not flustered thanks to Xiao, because he’s really not used to people noticing. 

- Venti trying to vent sneakily through fictional stories and Xiao is just like “Didn’t that basically happen to you” and Venti is just like “<_< shit”

- Venti once said affectionally that he wished he had met Xiao sooner and Xiao immediately and seriously shot it down by saying “If you had, I would have been forced to kill you” and both of them now stay up at night wondering who would have won that fight, not sure which result would have hurt more. (because honestly I have no idea who would win in that fight and that terrifies me- I like to think it would have been one of those legends that end with “and the fight persists to this day” or something along those lines)

- “How long have you been together?” “Adepti have no need for-” “1000+ years T^T how dare you deny our love” “O///O our...? ...useless”

- its disney- let me explain- i have this- i have this headcanon inspired by watching too many animatics- - so venti has a human form that isnt his- which he would have had to get used to moving in- and he’s a bard- - uh- anyway- as a third degree black belt in mixed martial arts, i can speak as an authority on this(not really an authority since i havent gone since quarantine but lets pretend). We have a thing referred to as the big three(most things do), and those things are martial arts, gymnastics, and dance. The idea is that they reflect really well off of each other and the best in any one category are good in all three. Timing, balance, form, discipline, technique, hand-eye coordination, grace, ease of motion, they all play a part- anyway-

- Venti taking Xiao’s prowess in martial arts and acrobatics and teaching him how to dance, and as someone who’s extremely skilled in the first two, the third comes easy to him, almost naturally. And it’s delicate and beautiful and lovely and it isn’t hurting anyone. And Venti points all these things out and more and despite how much Xiao insists that he feels ridiculous he truly does enjoy it and it goes a long way towards helping him form more healthy views of himself and his worth.  - Verr Goldett walked in on him once and made a joke about performing at the inn. unfortunately Venti was there and agreed on Xiao’s behalf before he could protest and- and it wasn’t as bad as Xiao thought it would be... he still wouldn’t do it again though without reason, but with good enough reasoning he could probably be convinced. 

- anyways point is he likes dancing to Venti’s songs and i just think that’s really cute - just picture the idea that all the animatics you see actually have the potential to be canon- ugh

- venti tries holding something out of Xiao’s reach since he’s taller and Xiao just fucking teleports 

- both need their space but when they dont, all they have to do is speak the other’s name and they’ll be there.

- and because i just had to.... love languages

- lets start with Xiao- i don’t think he’d view acts of service or quailty time as a love language tbh, and he blunt but really bad with words so affirmation is out, leaving gift giving and physical touch. However, he seems to view most material things as meaningless so- - Xiao who’s love language is in his fleeting touches, something he’s only recently grown comfortable with because of Venti, and now is giving back, which he knows he doesn’t have to do, but that he want’s to, though he’ll still continue to make excuses for each one. “you were shivering” “The inn is high up, you could have fallen..... I said what I said, you’d question an adeptus?”

- and as easy as it is to say words of affirmation for Venti- he does that for everyone- i want to say his is actually acts of service - its the acts of service that let him see just how much Xiao has progressed afterall, from teaching him to dance, to playing another song on the flute, to supplying him with the almond tofu he seems to enjoy so much. Every little thing he does helps Xiao to grow and he couldn’t be happier about that. 

-

- of course most of my headcanons for the ship do take place latter into the relationship because- y’know the less serious unhealthy vibes allow for greater range of thought, but i do still love to think about the serious implications so i kinda hopped back and forth. So sorry about how messy it is btw, i kinda- got carried away- it kinda got some kind of structure near the end tho so- maybe it’s okay. anyway- back to... lol something, we’ll see where thought forests lead.