#i dont think hes using Queer(tm) to describe himself or others
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cultofthepigeon · 10 days ago
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dc really had the like 90 year old gay dude saying the collective "queer" while also patting themselves on the back for that midnighter/apollo re-wedding despite having been the ones chosing to break them up during new 52
god DAMN corporate pride is so fucking annoying
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the-ghost-king · 4 years ago
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you have any nico headcanons where he’s ftm trans but then realizes he’s also nonbinary (he/they/she)? just struggling with gender identity lately ig.
Alright, anon, I hope these help you some, my gender has been rather ~~~ lately, if that makes any sense... I would also like to remind everyone to bind safely and if you need resources on how to safely bind without a binder feel free to reach out to me:
Nico always just knew he was a boy, dresses were a no-go, couldn't stand to wear anything that wasn't undeniably boys clothes
In the beginning Maria thought maybe it was just a texture problem, but when Nico was three she came home to see him cutting all of his hair off she knew it was deeper
This is why they ended up moving to America eventually, Maria decided that if they started over then Nico would be able to be himself
Bianca named him on the way over, she liked the name because they were "winning" by leaving Italy
Nothing really signifigant happens in regards to Nico and his gender through this point, he is able to play freely with other boys, and he goes to school with them and such
The same in the Lotus Hotel, nothing signifigant
When he and Bianca go to Westover Nico is kind of scared the whole time, because he is worried about being "caught", changing for afterschool soccer games and having communal shower spaces at the school is difficult for him to feel comfortable
He usually tries to shower late at night or early in the morning when nobody is around, and that works out okay for him
His chest starts developing around this point and he freaks out, he has no clue how to hide it or how to deal with the new stress
He ends up trying to find Bianca one day, and they do all sorts of crazy stuff to see if they can help, eventually they figure out how to use a piece of cloth they sew together
When Nico ends up at camp alone without Bianca, there's the problem once again of communal showers and they're rarely ever empty
This is how he befriends the Stolls
At some point the pair of them notice Nico is weirdly panicky about the bathrooms so they go stand outside and keep people out when Nico's in there... It's honestly how they perfect their pranking techniques
When Nico runs away from camp upset, just the day before his binder had quit fitting and he had been upset by that because he had to make a binder again
Although his sister dying pushed all other thoughts out of his head, the emotions from previous events were still leftover
This is why he buys his jacket TM, because the layers help hide his chest more and the weight is comfortable
At some point during the Labrynth he ends up binding with ace bandages (AN: Don't do this)
He also starts his period at some time around this point and kind of freaks out "oh no" and it's not entirely that his period bothers him, but more so that he just doesn't know how he's supposed to hide it
He also realizes at some point around here that he likes Percy, which makes him feel odd and more freaked out
He's struggling because "boys are supposed to like girls" and also he's struggling because if most boys oon't have periods and he does... why doesn't his bother him?
Despite Nico himself being trans, he doesn't have the vocabulary to describe anything he's going through, and he doesn't know there's other trans people, or even queer people of any sort
So he sort of begins to question "am I really a boy?" but there's so much going on in the world and he's got so much to do, so he can't really devote much time to thinking about it
Everything continues about canonically until he's in the jar after Tartarus
During a fight with a monster or something he was knocked over, and combine this with the fact that Nico was binding with ace bandages, he definitly breaks a rib
Which makes breathing with little air a lot harder
Eventually he's saved and through ambrosia and nectar Nico manages to heal his ribs a little
He isn't able to bind that whole time though, so he does his best to keep away from The Seven
After Cupid outs him to Jason, Jason asks a few days later if he wants to talk about it, at first Nico is like "no go away I don't like you don't talk to me"
But eventually he opens up to Jason, because Jason was like "I'm sorry you had to do that I promise I won’t tell anyone and if you want to talk we can talk"
Anyhow eventually Nico kind of just breaks down and he's like "I don't know if I'm a boy or a girl? I think I used to be a girl, but now I am a boy and I don't really remember how it happened” or something similar
It takes Jason a moment but eventually he’s like “Oh you’re trans?”
And Nico;s like “heh? What’s that?
And so him and Jason talk, but Jason is only kind of well versed in this topic, so he only covers “basic” MtF and FtM transition because he doesn’t really know enough about other genders to feel comfortable explaining it
And Nico’s like “there’s people? Out there?? Like me??” and he’s just Happy Nico ™
Nico is like “and there are people like me who like boys?”
And Jason is like “Yeah totally!” but internally he’s like (I think so??)
Anyhow Nico feels a little better, but he doesn’t feel perfect, he’s still struggling a little bit internally to recognize that there’s other people like him and he’s not wrong for being him
Anyhow, Jason doesn’t know enough about this stuff to know binders exist, Jason just has a little bit of secondhand information from tv shows and from being from California… He promises he’ll look into various things more when he’s back at camp or has decent access to internet
On Nico’s quest with Reyna and Hedge he obvious evaporates Bryce, and Reyna and Hedge find out
They find out he’s gay as in canon, but they realize he’s trans when caking him in mud
Hedge just goes into dad mode about the situation and is like “son”, “sport”, “kiddo”, “my male child” etc
Reyna knows a little more about trans stuff than Jason, but she’s kind of in the same “ehhh I’m not really sure of a few things” boat, but she’s supportive and she’s like “I will beat anyone who gives you a dirty look up so fast”
Eventually they get to camp, and all that happens
Three days in the infirmary happens, and basically Nico has to tell Will for medical reasons that he’s trans because Nico needs stitches or something
Anyhow Will is like “Oh yeah cool me too, can you take your binder off now?”
And Nico is like “heh???”
Anyhow Will finds out Nico is binding with ace bandages and he’s like “no, don��t do that” and then he goes and finds a proper binder in Nico’s size which he gives to him after his stay is up
When they befriend one another they have a short conversation about gender and Will is discussing like gender theory 101 type stuff, and he’s like “wait why dont you know this- oh yeah you’re from the thirties- wait do you even know what nonbinary means??”
And Nico is just staring at Will like he has three heads for the whole conversation
So Will teaches Nico about gender and pronouns, and gender presentation vs gender identity, etc
And so Nico goes “wait so there are people like me who are also gay?”
And Will is like “I like boys and girls and everything in between so yeah”
And the whole enby thing doesn’t really stick with Nico at that point he’s just like “hmm interesting, so testosterone?”
It’s just not his biggest concern, he’s just happy to know there are in fact others like him, and no he’s not crazy for not being dysphoric over his period, and that’s normal too
And he’s just like “oh so that’s top dysphoria?”
And Will is like “yeah :/”
“Oh :/”
“Mhmm :/”
Anyhow they become like good friends and they start dating sort of on accident, like they’re too close to just argue they’re friends anymore, and at some point Will just shows Nico how to give him a T shot and it’s like chill, they’re chill
Anyhow one day someone is kind of confused by Nico’s gender so they use the word “they” and it makes Nico really happy for some reason, so he goes back to Will and he’s like “tell me about this whole nobinary thing again?”
And Will is like “yes absolutely”
And Nico goes “I think I might be nonbinary can we try new pronouns?”
And so they go through all sorts of new pronouns, and Nico decides he still likes he/him but he also likes they/them and xer/xem… They likes she/her too but Nico finds it too uncomfortable sometimes because it reminds him of dysphoria
Nico decides xyr uncomfortable with using she/her but they like using female gendered terms so he does that
(Listen, I know Will saying “this is my boyfriend” was a big moment but Will calling Nico his “wife” is 10/10)
Nico’s friends are all super supportive and they do their best to learn more about gender and such things in order to better support and care for Nico
They all use different pronouns for xem and some people alternate pronouns too, but Nico knows that takes more practice
But it’s just like good and positive in Nico’s life
And he begins to play with fashion a lot and xe finds out xyr love of skirts with tights and combat boots because it’s 10/10 the best fashion
Nico also loves their big jackets and they just looks so comfy all the time everyone is like “I want to be him” and Nico grows their hair out long again, and gets his ears pierced and xe’s just a nonbinary fashion icon
They are just so cool once they figure out gender more and Nico’s just happy to play around with xyr gender and he just enjoys it
Will doesn’t play around with gender so much, he’s 100% a binary trans guy but T helped make him comfortable enough in his femininity to wear skirts a little bit on the occasion (Will in a cat maid dress 10/10), but heels and skinny jeans for some reason are still big dysphoria triggers for him so he does have some limits on what he’ll wear
Will gets top surgery when he’s like 17 because Naomi is an extremely supportive parent
So that’s how Nico meets Will’s mom and she’s like “it’s so nice to finally meet you!” and Naomi just immediately falls in love with xem and Will is like “I know they’re amazing”
And Nico is just really supportive and they sort of role reverse and Nico plays nurse while Will recovers from top surgery and they has to like brush his teeth and stuff
The experience (despite the fact that Will had an easier recovery) assures Nico in how much he wants top surgery, and he’s sad he’ll have to wait another year until he’s 18 to get it done
Anyhow Hades finds out and agrees to sign the wavers, so once Will is healed up enough to wear he can put his own clothes on and stuff, Nico decides to go through with xyrs own top surgery then too
Reyna comes to help Will take care of Nico, and Jason does too
Originally Will was supposed to help more with Nico’s care but he wasn’t able to do as much as he thought so they had to phone their friends
Eventually they both heal up really well and they’re happy to be done with that
Nico spends time debating testosterone, while Will spends time debating lower surgery
During this time Nico starts art school and Will starts medical school
Meeting more nonbinary people makes Nico feel at home and he determines that xe doesn’t want to go on testosterone but it’s still a maybe in the future
Will however decides he does want lower surgery, so Will and Lou Ellen decide to get lower surgery together as friends so they can share in the pain (Lou Ellen is a trans woman as far as I’m concerned this is canon)
Nico takes some time off to do school from home so he can help the two of them, and Naomi comes to live with them as well for a bit
Will and Nico both finish school eventually and they decide to adopt trans kids to help them out more
Anyhow, I hope you enjoy all of that anon! I'm all ideaed (idea-ed??) out and so I hope this is at least similar to what you were looking for, and this is helpful with your dysphoria somewhat <3
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