#i dont like social medias. i have never lasted on any site-curated social medias for more than a couple months

[draculagerard]

fucking tumblr. holy shit

[mysticgoblinwriter]

Okay I've been wanting to say this for quite a while now

For Fic Writers, Readers, and Everyone-

Tumblr is bad for your mental health. And not in the "expect bullies-yaddayadda" way.

Oh and - a person disagreeing with you or calling you out for bad behavior (done nicely) is not bullying. So lets just drop that right now.

It sneaks up on you and suddenly you start to care about notes and "famous people" who are the most followed within your fandom

Tumblr is a great place, but only in small doses. Its human nature to want to go with the flow and check what other people think/have been doing. But within doing that you drag yourself deeper into a whirlpool of always wanting to follow this unwritten code of bullshit. Because you don't want to offend anybody, because you don't want to be rude.

You know the rules.-

Reblog/Comment on a fic

Respond to tag games

If you haven't read the latest popular works you're a terrible person

If you don't read your friends fics you're an even worse person

That's all bullshit. If I was writing a book irl every month I would not say to my friends "you must read this or I will not think highly of you anymore"

I do have this to say- cross tagging isn't nice or cool. Its a jerk move. Stop it. That was not said nicely and I am aware of that.

If your friends are true ones, then they know they do not have to reblog your work. If you guilt them into reading it then its not being a real friend. I love my mutuals works! But I don't read them all because tbh I do not read fanfic daily or even weekly. And they understand!!

There's room within this fandom for the readers who read once a week, once a month. Once a year even.

There should never be any guilt about not reading the latest fic, or not wanting to read your fave's work or anything pertaining to the matter.

There's also the tumblr effect which shortens your attention span to about 10 seconds. Are you wondering why you can't watch TV or read a real book anymore? Because you have adapted to the tumblr span and your brain cannot/will not allow you to concentrate because you've been spending all your time getting new exciting info every 10 seconds.

Then there's the authors guilt on which I am directly calling you out on. A lot of authors now want instant response to their published fics and they guilt people into reading them and commenting.

Just maybe they don't want to read your latest fic. Which is FINE. Yes it hurts because you put effort and emotions into it. Also I'm not blaming you fully, its the habitat of this place to expect instant snappy results. Which does not work.

Social Media Habits Do Not Work In Real Life.

Authors in this fandom 'Marvel' have gotten pushy. And its gotten ridiculous. We as authors owe nothing to anybody, and readers also owe us nothing, not even likes. But I think its time to stop making this place harsh for the average reader. That does not mean bend to rude anons wills and the mean readers.

Likes count. Y'all don't want to hear that because you don't want to hear opinions different than yours. Fine. Its your dash and curate it how you want.

But likes are good because it shows me a person read my work, and took an action to show me they did. Reblogs/comments are great.

But guilting people into giving them is not. That's not cool.

There's a serious problem of equating reblogs with self worth on this site and I get that. But finding self worth in others is not the way to go. I get it. I love getting notifs and whatnot. But,,,, its not where its at folks.

When is the last time you wrote for yourself? The last time you didn't have any pressure writing a fic? I see so many authors stressed out about something that should be fun. We've done wrote the fun out writing. This mindset is bad both for the author and the reader.

The emotion that goes into fics is real. I am not discrediting that at all.

Just admit you want validation and attention and work from there. but its never going to be enough. You got 500 followers. Then you want 1,000. Then 2,000. It'll never stop unless you stop it.

I am seriously worried for y'all. So much stress and everyone is treating fic writing like a second job.

Ending notes- My fucks have flown away, look, there's a flock of them flying away as we speak. This isn't to attack anybody or be mean, its just to bring to attention some serious things.

(Incase anybody was thinking this- I do not think myself higher than you just bc I have lost my give a shit. There's days where i get frazzled and expect instant results too. I'm working on that and will always be.)

tl;dr- i dont even know

[computerguideworld-blog]

I fall asleep on my computer: six people on their relationship with the web

New Post has been published on https://computerguideto.com/must-see/i-fall-asleep-on-my-computer-six-people-on-their-relationship-with-the-web/

I fall asleep on my computer: six people on their relationship with the web

As a study shows many people feel unable to switch off from the internet, we ask our readers how much time a week they spend online

Do you spend too much time online? Its a question that may unearth some uncomfortable truths, and if you are worried about how much you use Facebook/Google et al, youre not alone.

The annual communications market report from media and telecoms regulator Ofcom looks at how people cope with spending so much time connected, and this year it found that more than a third of UK internet users are taking digital detox breaks from the web. It found an increasing amount of time we spend online is leading to lost sleep and less time spent with friends and family.

Six people talk about their relationship with the web, and whether they have the balance right. Share your thoughts below the line.

Cary, 61: My friendships have fallen apart and I am gaining weight by being in all the time

Time spent online: 10 to 12 hours a day

At first I used the internet just for responding to emails. Then for reading news online, shopping and chats. Forums were a totally new experience for me I remember finding it amazing that you could talk to someone through a computer. I have tried various discussion forums, even met with few people out of curiosity. I thought the web was so great because of such vast opportunities for meeting people from beyond my immediate circle, of learning from each other, and doing stuff together.

But that hasnt really happened. My friendships have fallen apart and I am gaining weight by being in all the time. The internet affects my ability to sleep too. My day is turned upside down I go to bed very late because I often get carried away reading something. Time flies when I am doing that! I imposed a regime on myself to do things at home but I drag my feet when it comes to going out.

Whatever I need is now on the web: I can do online banking, shop online and find recipes there too. Information is much easier to get, but I do miss that personal contact with people.

Jenny, 27, Kent: I use the internet at work and go straight online when I get home

Time spent online: 10 hours a day I grew up with the internet I remember the whirling beep-boop of dial-up. I use the internet at work, and go straight online when I get home. Im always logging into apps to play games or check my Facebook messages. I have mostly used the internet to stay connected, though, with friends from across the world. In my teens I used MSN to talk to people these days I go on Facebook and join online chats. Having said this, I can happily spend hours away from the net playing with friends, but the habit of checking for updates online is always there.

The internet has always been a way to stay connected for me. I have made amazing friends in the US and elsewhere. It has helped me feel connected, and talk to people about a variety of topics. Seeing a US perspective of the current elections online, for example, has been refreshing.

I dont feel like there are any drawbacks to the internet. I can go without it, but I dont ever feel the need to switch off. I often go camping and never think of my phone because Im with the friends. I suppose you might need some sort of balance but I dont feel like it negatively affects my life at all.

In the early 2000s, MSN was widely used for chatting online, via messages or webcams. Photograph: Alamy

Mel, 24, London: The internet has made my anxiety worse

Time spent online: one to five hours a day

Some days I trawl through the internet looking for inspiration or to help with my work, but over the long summer months this happens less. I started my BA just last year and a lot of my friends have already graduated, have exciting jobs and are generally having more fun (or so Instagram tells me).

Although I feel Im right where Im supposed to be, seeing their carefully curated lives as they appear on social media exacerbates my anxiety. The web is also very addictive. Ive now deleted social media apps and use the sites on my browser for a fraction of the time I used to, but I often feel rubbish after using them.

Ive battled with mental health issues for a long time. Even though at times of deep depression I actually found sites like Reddit strangely helpful, overall I think the internet has definitely made my anxiety worse.

Reddit was particularly helpful after coming out theres a huge queer community on Reddit and the kind of stories and advice there is really helpful.

But even though its made it easier to connect with others, the internet can also turn feelings my of unsettlement into a full-blown meltdown (whether its a post making me think a friend is avoiding me or Ive Googled my symptoms and think Im dying).

Having said that my partner and I wouldnt have met if it wasnt for the ultimate nerve-racking experience of online dating. I guess being shy and anxious and having no clue how to navigate life as a queer woman, it has allowed me to meet new people that I wouldnt have approached in real life.

Ive had to put a ban on phones when my partner and I spend quality time together because although Ive made an effort to use mine a lot less, she will be fiddling around online. I avoid looking at her Instagram and Facebook feeds sometimes. I get Fomo [fear of missing out] and read too much into things, I guess.

Mike, 67, Brittany: The internet lets us keep in touch with family and friends

Time spent online: two to five hours a day

Its made our relocation to France much easier and smoother. The internet lets us keep in touch with family and friends, even while theyre travelling and/or very busy. It also allows us to keep better informed and pursue personal interests and research.

Its a massive help in solving practical quotidian problems (DIY, health, transport, holidays etc). Im more positive about the net and spend more time online than my partner, but it rarely causes tension. We still talk to each other as much as we always did.

Im more positive about the net, and spend more time online than my partner, but it rarely causes tension. Photograph: Sarah Lee for the Guardian

I dont think it affects my ability to get jobs done either; if anything researching online helps me tackle jobs I might have been daunted by in the past.

JP, 65, Bristol: I am online during my first cup of coffee, breakfast, lunch and dinner

Time spent online: eight to 10 hours a day

Before the arrival of internet I used to spend a lot of hours a week researching in the library, reading the news and also writing letters to friends and family so it was easy for me to migrate online. Actually, the internet made everything I enjoy much easier to do. I do, however, consider myself dependent on it, as I am online during my first cup of coffee, breakfast, lunch and dinner (except when I go out to see friends). I usually fall asleep on my computer.

I doubt that it has benefited my life, as all the hours spent online could have been better spent outdoors. The web does, however, satisfy lots of my curiosities, and I can read an endless number of articles from around the world.

Dining al desko: do you eat your lunch by your computer? Photograph: Alamy

It would be hard to see the world without the internet, but I do think we all waste far too much time online. If the internet didnt exist, I would have spent the same amount of time reading, so I dont believe it really affects my relationships. Sometimes it can be a huge distraction, however. I often think, just 15 more minutes, 10 more minutes, and so on, as the hours go by.

Matthew, 30, Northamptonshire: I deleted my Facebook a few years ago and life has been better since

Time spent online: 12 hours a day

I have to use the internet as part of my job in IT support and obviously the web contributes to me earning a decent living so I cant be too negative about it.

Being online all day can get a little tiring at times, however, and about six years ago I deleted my Facebook and my life has been better without it. I have tried Twitter and Instagram too but have since deleted the accounts because I dont feel I need the gratification of a like or a retweet in my life. Sometimes I feel like Im missing out but then again some of the things online are really not beneficial to me or worth keeping up with.

From an educational perspective the internet has allowed me to expand my knowledge across a broad range of subjects. At the end of the day we all have a choice about what we consume online and its all about being sensible.

Due to my thirst for knowledge the internet sometimes does affect my sleep: I have been known to be on my phone until the early hours reading Wikipedia or watching YouTube videos. It could be worse I guess, I could be on Facebook trying to promote my perfect existence like the rest of them.

Read more: http://www.theguardian.com/us