#i dont know the bible lore so sorry if this is innacurate | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

raiiney-days · 1 year ago

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i think earth is just one big fucked up dnd campaign. like, god is the sleep deprived dm who was trying to run a erious campaign but gave up bcs the players kept fucking around and doing stupid shit. and jesus and the archangels are the players who keep coming up with increasingly stupid ways to deal with shit.

#every time that jesus's characyer dies he picks an even stupider name for the next one #(X Æ A-Xii was one of his best works yet)#the billionaires song who went to the blink-182 concert during oceangate was one of uriels more short lived characters #after lizzie was taken out gabriel gave up on having normal characters and made mallibu barbie paytas #the murder hornets were an attempt to get everyone to stop making stupid characters but raphael rolled to seduce them instead #elon musk was the product of an inside joke between michael and zadkiel and no one wants him to stay around but michael keeps rolling high #camael is always busy and only ever shows up with single use characters to fuck shit up and leave #global warming was a big quest god tried to send them all on but they got distracted by the npcs #the pandemic was another failed quest line that god eventually just gave up on and halfheartedly fixed when the party wouldnt try to fix it #the bible #dnd #what the fuck #its 3am #please send help #i dont fucking know #does this even make sense #im gonna go play wordscapes now #uhhh #i dont know the bible lore so sorry if this is innacurate #im so tired #i have also play led all of like 3 dnd sessions so yeah #bye

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