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thisisthinprivilege · 1 year ago

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How can I overcome internalized fatphobia? How can I not hate what I look like when I'm fat?

This is going to be a different process for everyone, so I'm not sure what will work for you. I will let you know what worked for me, and hopefully you find it helpful.

Deprogramming Step One: Coming to grips with having been programmed in the first place. Beauty standards change from age to age, they are not inborn as far as our research is able to conclude. There's perhaps a weak preference for facial symmetry, but that's about it. Weight-based beauty standards have not only varied wildly through human history, they vary in our very own era, between-cultures. Often what we believe we find beautiful has been programmed into us from a very early age. There's no conspiracy, it's simply how cultural preferences are transmitted within-culture: through the adults we look up to, media, and reinforced by peers. That's not to say deprogramming is a simple matter. It's very difficult. I wonder now, almost 15 years after starting my own journey to deprogram myself, whether who I find beautiful or attractive is rooted in beauty standards I saw reflected as a kid or teen.

Deprogramming Step Two: Define and avoid thin-centric messaging. A big part of this for me was controlling the media I consumed. I unsubscribed to cable, for instance, because of the intrusive and omnipresent weight loss ads. That was 15 years ago, but it's surprising how similar some streaming services/channels are in terms of ad length and intrusiveness these days. Unfortunately, tiktoks/reels aren't entirely controllable. Even though I don't consume weight loss or diet content, weight loss/diet tiktoks/reels pop up occasionally. Besides ads, you should also consider whether your magazines, books, movies, and shows over-focus on the stories of thin people, or demonize fat people. Obviously, stop watching exploitative shows that turn the lives of fat people into sideshows or sob stories. More controversially, you might want to temporarily unsubscribe or mute fat activist content. Fat activism is a highly stressful space where we confront the hatred of fat people explicitly. It's not great for deprogramming thin-centric messaging, because fat activists will be talking about thin-centric messaging from a critical perspective. Take a break, for a while.

Deprogramming Step Three: Exposure to fat-positive content. This is the fun part of the process, where you get a chance to rewrite the aesthetic coding in your brain! I suggest searching out fat models who wear the kind of clothing you like, fat role models who share your interests, fat positive videos showcasing fat people doing amazing things, fat positive art, fat positive fiction and movies, and so on. Fatshion is full of fat positivity. Be wary of "body positive" content, as it can still be subtly or explicitly fatphobic. I warn you, after a few months of exposure to a different aesthetic, thin-centric media is gonna look hella strange. You'll go to see some romcom-flavor-of-the-month movie and be like, "Where are all the fat people? Why is everyone super skinny?"

Deprogramming Step Four: From theory to practice. This step is about starting to wear the clothes you want to wear, being loud and proud to exist as a fat person in public, being romantically bolder if romance is your thing, being more assertive and confident in your body, traveling to the places you've always wanted to go, doing things you were holding back doing before, etc. You may need to dwell in Step Three for a while, or revisit it over and again, in order to complete Step Four. This doesn't mean becoming an activist. This means becoming your authentic self without fat-related qualms. Yes, you will still be constrained by the greater world around you. Traveling, going out to eat, dating, interviewing for jobs, even going to a fucking concert will present constraints and bigotries that smaller people (everything else held equal) don't have to face. But you can now see them as constraints placed on you, not as constraints you place on yourself or that are in any way deserved. Hopefully, you will be able to face them without it destroying your sense of self-worth.

Deprogramming Step Five: The authentic self...? We know that as fat people we are not morally or otherwise inferior to thin(ner) people. So what does it mean to leave our best and most authentic lives, as fat people? This is the human question, that all humans share with each other equally. We are connected to each other, each on our own grand journey to answer this question. When you are able to separate the sociocultural difficulty of being a fat person in a fat-hating society from your own life journey, you have one less barrier to manage in answering the great human question. At this stage, you'll feel calm and comfortable in your body, and surprised when people point out your fatness or treat you differently for it. They're distracted by false moral categories, while you have better things to do. Does anyone ever permanently dwell in this stage? Probably not. But I feel like this most of the time, now. It takes a lot to drag me back into the world where one of the worst things you can call another human is "fatty." I've got books to read and write, math to learn, art to create. A life to live, where my possibilities are not defined by the size of my body.

-ArteToLife

#thin privilege #thin-centric society #deprogramming fat hatred #fat positivity #fat acceptance #fat activism #tips for overcoming fatphobia

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reblogthiscrapkay · 5 days ago

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Review Of My 2024 New Year’s Resolutions/2025 Resolutions

I feel like this is the year I have finally started to be okay. I had a few lapses relating to the horrible thing that I have been dealing with for years but honestly? I'm doing well. I've gone away a lot. I'm spent a lot of time with people I care about. I've embraced the beauty of the life I have. Here's hoping next year is even better! But let's look at the stats.

*Reduce “Want To Read” list down to 45. Plus, read three of my “In Limbo” books. Pass. I never seem to pass my book goals but I did this year and I did it by October! In fact, I read something like seven In Limbo books and got rid of a bunch of others that I decided I was never going to read.

*Watch all the movies of 2024 that I care about. Watch/Rewatch all the movies on that list I made with Adam. Pass. As always, a lot of big movies come out in late December so I am always finishing this resolution in January, but I've been keeping up well. As for the other list, Adam was determined to succeed with me so we were done by November.

*Practice bass guitar once a week. Fail. I don't really have an excuse outside of the fact that I was insanely busy with work last school year, and I'm insanely tired with work this year.

*Maintain a consistent D&D campaign. Pass. We get together about once every two months because two of the members have less time than the rest of us, but it happened and is happening!

*Exercise at least three times a week. Fail. I started pretty well with this but it started to fall apart in September. It's honestly crazy how much the school schedule change has been weighing on my energy.

*Go to at least three new places. Pass. Super pass. I went to six new countries, Hawaii, and Puerto Rico. I got the fellowship I applied for so that really made this easy.

*No new clothes unless I’m replacing something. Fail. I was doing well with this one for a while and only buying replacements, but I did get a cashmere sweater in Nepal (generally people are sympathetic to this one), a new skirt, a new cardigan, and a new dress. Those last three where the result of discovering a new brand. Oops.

*Go back to doing something with your novel. Soft Fail. This one was made more difficult by the fact that my hard drive died and I still haven't gotten it fixed. I did however add another act to my play, making it better in my opinion, and I'm working on a short story now so I am writing.

2025 Resolutions *Reduce “Want To Read” list down to 30. (No ARCs this time since I made such progress last year. Also my list has a lot of longer books and books in a series so this is already an ambitious goal, especially since I always pick up random things along the way.) *Watch all the movies of 2025 that I care about. *Maintain a consistent D&D campaign. *Practice bass guitar once a week. (I need to reactivate the practice alarm and actually listen to it.) *Exercise at least three times a week. (Difficult right now. Hopefully easier with warmer weather? I don't know. I need to develop a new system somehow.) *Go to at least three new places. (I have plans to go to Romania for Spring Break and five(?) places in South America in the summer. This should be easy.) *No new clothes unless I’m replacing something. No more than 10 new nail polishes. More groceries and less take away. (This is a need to not have too much stuff with the first two and to stop spending money overall. I'm making a concentrated effort with this one by unsubscribing from every mailing list so the temptation is diminished. I use Firefox and have had ad blockers on everything for years, but usually I shop by imagining something and then seeking it out anyway. Either way, I hope this helps.) *Fix your dang hard drive and then think long and hard about your writing.

#new year #resolutions

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af1899 · 3 years ago

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FEH - So, update notes for 5.9.0 are out

ICYMI, last night we got news on what's coming for the 5.9.0 software update for Fire Emblem Heroes, which you can check on this archived copy at Gamepedia.

But I want to comment on each point of interest right below and resume more or less all that's new as well as sharing my thoughts, feel free to continue reading.

First of all, the thing we all look forward to the most:

✨ R E F I N E S ✨

Who wouldn't be excited to see one of their favorite characters or that of someone else's getting a well deserved refine after a long wait? Us Micaiah fans are "eating well" lately, meaning that we're happy with the attention she's been getting, but the coming refine announcement is all we should probably read of her in a while:

Yes, you're seeing right, her Brave alt is getting a refine, I've been waiting to decide how I want to build her. 🥺 But hopefully it's good, I'm excited regardless.

As for the others, it was about normal, the other [CYL 2019] winners were also bound to get theirs around this time as well as some of the oldest Legendaries too, this time, Ephraim and Lyn got lucky with new refines, they both have received great remix upgrades overall but [Solar Brace II] for Ephraim is particularly looking quite better indeed, I have mine at +1 +hp collecting dust so I look forward to see what his refine will be otherwise if I don't like it enough and if someone needs [Atk/Def Solo 4] he'll have his days counted.

In a similar topic, Hector in his Legendary alt isn't getting a refine yet, but he's getting [Crafty Fighter 3] and an upgraded version of [Ostia's Pulse], which is slightly less restrictive but has a few extras to grant him an extra utility. He also gains extra inheritance value thanks to the former addition, both skills are easy to secure with the 4 available slots.

Male Kana is getting [Dusk Dragonstone] which is a direct counterpart to that of his sister's weapon, perhaps the effects at base and refine will be analogous, but we'll learn at the time of datamine, taking place soon after the update gradually rolls out this 9/2/2021 at 8:00 p.m. (GMT-3) so in about 3 days and 3 hours as of this post's creation date.

Next up, I want to cover our next batch of limited [Combat Manuals]:

This time, Soiree Nephenee and Flora are our 5★ choices, and they're actually good, but not so impressive.

For me... Flora means I can finally get [Atk/Res Solo 3] and [Quick Riposte 3] on OG Idoun (for context, she's my "skill unit", so I'm giving her every skill she can get) and Soiree Nephenee means I can finally merge her, which is so pog because mine is -spd and I quite like her:

It sure sucks, but it's not so bad, still, it's great I can finally patch it.

Again, I'll leave any appreciation talk for later, and I only have this version of her.

There's also Spring Saleh, the only noteworthy 4★ one who carries good skills and can also serve as merge for those working on him, but if you want my recommendation, try to secure Soiree Nephenee, her fodder is all right and she's a seasonal unit, if you also happen to be working on her, that means you can give her a free merge.

Asides all that, the following Legendary Heroes will now appear only in {Legendary Hero Remix} banners, the next should be coming some time in the middle of this month: Lucina, Azura, Tiki, Eirika, Marth and Hríd.

We're getting new [Memento Events] for [Heroes Journey] (the scenes with random outcomes you can watch when you get 100 [Memento Points]), we'll learn of them after the software update.

I didn't get all the possible outcomes in this event when it was around and didn't even know until last day that the three [Orbs] from the quests were daily so I missed 6 of them, what a drag, but at least I finished it I guess.

But speaking of it, I realized I've never given my insight on it, but so far I think it's an okay event with more fun interactions, rewards are quite nice and appreciated, but it has little play value making it less impressive and easy to forget (adding to the fact it'll run once in each month for 3 days), specially once you get all the rewards it's almost pointless to farm beyond then, but make sure you clear it once everyday when it's around!

Finally, just a random [Aether Raids] structure has its level cap raised by 1 as per usual and two weapons are getting one of their mechanisms fixed to work as intended (Nyx's [Ginnungagap] sure was more important though) but no news on coming music to the [Concert Hall] since months so 0/10 dislike unsubscribe.

It's overall a decently packed update but there's not much to be excited about, other than the refines for the [CYL 2019], as said before, I think it's most exciting to me, but that and the free merge on Soiree Nephenee are my only major highlights.

#fire emblem heroes #fe heroes #cyl3 #fe micaiah

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quakebeats · 6 years ago

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i don't watch cow chop, but see it on here sometimes. is there a reason they're ending their channel? i didn't realize they were :0

there’s many reasons, mainly that they were doomed by youtube from the start. first, their algorithm is super screwed up so people (still) don’t see new videos from channels they are subbed to in their subscription box. and most people don’t go to the channels to see so views are lost that way.

second, they also lost ad revenue this past year so their income comes only from patreon, their sponsors and the donations they get on livestreams from my knowledge. so you can’t run a business without any money and theirs is dwindling.

there are only two OG members now (who have been there since colorado) and they have lost a lot of employees over the years, specifically trevor and joe who were fan favorites. then james, who was the owner and creator alongside aleks, left because it was taking a toll on him. a whole ton of people unsubscribed after that or stopped watching new videos altogether.

SO their view counts for videos decreased as a result of all of these things combined. money, algorithm and stress from it all which all was a direct result from shitty ass youtube. so if youtube fixed their algorithm and didn't have such strict rules for content then the channel would probably be in a totally different place now.

when their contract is up with rooster teeth at the end of the year, it sounds like they will see where it goes but odds are it’s over and done with. they’re all exhausted. they all have their own things going on. some members have created new channels and migrated to twitch and whatnot. it’s super sad cause i have watched them from the beginning. it’s bittersweet but i want them all to be happy and healthy so if calling it quits is what they gotta do then so be it.

#answered

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keithtlamb-blog · 6 years ago

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19% of resolution-setters don't even know if they reached their goal last year

I don't do New Year's resolutions. When planning out goals, I focus on “themes” a lot more, since they let me look at the year ahead with a broad lens. Once I know what my theme is for the year, I can start thinking of creative and meaningful ways to drive toward that theme.

Here's an example I like to give: if my theme is “make new friends,” I can plan events to meet new people or think of ways to meet new people at events I already planned on attending (e.g., check the guest list beforehand and email them to grab coffee).

But just like there's more than one way to live a Rich Life, there's more than one way to think about what you do at the beginning of a year to set yourself up for success.

So the team at IWT was curious to hear what YOU think about New Year's resolutions.

Do you set them? What are they about? What do you do to set yourself up for success? DO you actually succeed?

Here's what they found.

We sent our survey to the entire IWT community and wanted the full picture of your 2018 resolutions: the goals, the strategies, AND the outcomes. So instead of asking about what you're planning to do this year, we asked you to reflect on what you resolved to do last year, in 2018.

A few of the key takeaways:

66% of you said you set a resolution for 2018. That's higher than the 44% of people setting New Year's goals this year, according to an NPR/PBS/Marist poll.

Of those who did set a resolution, 44% said they achieved it.

36% said they didn't quite get there.

20% said they weren't really sure whether they met their goal or not.

The most popular areas where you set resolutions were:

Career (23%)

Money (21.6%)

Fitness (16%)

The most popular system used to hit goals:

Creating a schedule (56%)

Getting an accountability buddy (28.5%)

Setting up rewards for yourself (29%)

“Why wait until January 1 to start something new?”

33% of people say they didn't set a resolution last year. The biggest reason: viewing the first of the year as some be-all-end-all of goal-setting is pointless.

“If you want to do something you should start doing it,” one person said. “Why wait until January 1 to start something new?”

That's fair. There are 365 days in a year - proclaiming January 1 THE day to set goals because that's when advertisers break out their best “New Year, New You” banner ads is pretty arbitrary.

And if you missed the New Year's deadline this year and wait all the way until next year to set goals for yourself, all you've really done is cost yourself 364 days when you could be taking action.

Need help following through on your goals whenever you set them? Check out this post on how to motivate yourself.

The “Big 3” resolutions: Career, money, fitness

We asked the 66% of respondents who did set resolutions last year to tell us which category their resolution fell under, and the top three were:

Career (23%)

Money (21.6%)

Fitness (16%)

Those first two categories in particular are pillars of I Will Teach You To Be Rich. Here's more detail at the kinds of career, money, and fitness goals readers are setting - and the results they're getting.

Goal #1: Get out of a soul-sucking job

When it came to career-related resolutions, people talked a lot about wanting to advance in their career. And for most of them, moving up meant moving on.

So long, cubicle.

For some, that meant transitioning out of the corporate world to try their hand at freelancing. (Sound good to you? Learn how to start earning money on the side.):

“I resolved to quit my corporate job to freelance. I assessed my finances, secured some part-time income to supplement my savings early on, and made the leap. I made myself commit to leave by April of 2018. My last day in a cubicle was February 9, 2018.”

Another reader told us about hatching a career plan with a friend over Facebook Messenger that they called “The Escape”:

“Every time one of us would slack on something or show signs of laziness, we would say to each other 'What happened to escaping X company in a year?' … In just under a year, we both landed new jobs. He now works for a bank with a $20K raise, and I completely pivoted industries from finance to marketing at a large media agency.”

Sometimes setting a goal and not quite getting there can be better than not setting a goal at all, since you still wind up farther along than where you started.

One person told us about the work they put into boosting their salary from their current $65K toward a $105K goal:

“I read books and watched YouTube videos, and practiced negotiating skills. I networked and set myself up to be an ideal candidate for 8 different jobs that I wanted … I landed a job that paid $96K. I chose that one because it had the most opportunity for career growth and development in my field.”

Aiming for $105K and landing at $96K might sound like a failure on paper. But the important thing is: they set a goal, they made a plan, and then they TOOK ACTION. They took control of what they could control.

Plus, they're putting themselves in an even stronger position for 2019: “Next year, with my promotion, I am aiming for closer to $120K.”

If a pay raise is on your to-do list for 2019, check out our Ultimate Guide to Boosting Your Salary.

Goal #2: Break down money barriers and go after Big Wins

On the financial side of things, a big theme was taking control of financial situations on two fronts: getting out of debt, and boosting savings for retirement and other goals.

“I made a promise to myself to save a total of $10K by the end of the year between emergency fund and retirement contributions. I put $3,000 into an emergency fund before the end of last year. Now, my e-fund is at $6,500, and my IRA contributions YTD are at $3,500. $10K achieved! On top of that, I was able to pay off my car, double my student loan payments, and go on vacation, guilt-free. Thanks, Ramit!”

We love stories like this, because they're all about focusing on Big Wins. Not how many lattes you can cut or micro-managing your budget to within an inch of its life. Big Wins, like automating your finances and investing early, pay dividends for years after you start them - and they put you miles ahead of everyone else.

You can't print money. It's illegal. But you CAN take control of your finances by focusing on the Big Wins.

There's a limit to how much you can save, but there's no limit to what you can earn. If our survey responses are any indication, it's a lesson a lot of you have taken to heart.

One reader told us about their goal to add $100K to their net worth OUTSIDE their day job by the end of 2018:

“I finally decided it was time to get serious about making money. I set a goal of adding $100,000 to my net worth by the end of 2018 (outside my day job) and I'm on the brink of accomplishing it.”

On top of looking for ways to increase their earning potential, some respondents mentioned financial goals that involved changing their relationship to the money they already have.

For one person, that meant committing to a year of no shopping:

“I unsubscribed from emails from all the brands that I followed (makeup, yoga clothes, kitchen stuff, etc.), and throw out catalogs as soon as they come in the door,” she explains. “I haven't been 100% for the year, but I've determined that what some people call 'shopping' is, for me, 'looking for things to want.'”

Spending money, in and of itself, isn't the problem. The problem is when the way you're spending doesn't line up with what you value (i.e., your Money Dial), or what allows you to live your own personal definition of a Rich Life.

Goal #3: Putting that gym membership to use

On the fitness side of things, the big recurring theme was looking for systems and strategies that get you into the gym - even when every ounce of your energy is pulling you toward the couch.

Here's one respondent who was so determined to make fitness work for them, they picked up knife fighting. KNIFE FIGHTING!

“Fitness can be boring, so I committed to stick/knife fighting, which was lethally exciting enough to keep me engaged for a few months and build up some strength/endurance.”

She's talking about her workout routine, guys.

Somebody else shared how, after more than 10 years of making fitness their New Year's resolution - and falling short every time - they finally found a model that set them up for success:

“The cool thing about having failed to achieve my fitness goals is that I figured out what doesn't work for me … I schedule my sessions, three times a week, and I set them in stone on my calendar. I have had to move a couple sessions, but I have not missed a single workout since I started.”

The lesson here: If a goal is important to you, don't stop pushing because ONE strategy didn't work out. Regroup, rethink your approach - and then try again.

How to follow through: Set a schedule. Talk about it. Treat yourself.

Talk is cheap. There's setting New Year's resolutions - and then there's actually following through on them. According to our survey, 44% of resolution-setters said they succeeded with their 2018 goal.

Here's a rundown of the most popular ways respondents stayed on track to achieve their goals:

Created a schedule (56%)

Got an accountability buddy (28.5%)

Put a rewards system in place (16%)

Digging deeper, we found they're also the top three most effective at helping readers reach their goals:

Created a schedule (56% of successful people)

Got an accountability buddy (22% of successful people)

Put a rewards system in place (16% of successful people)

Put it in your calendar. Or … shower.

“Creating a schedule” isn't the sexiest strategy there is. But with more than half of the successful resolution-setters saying that setting schedules was a secret to their success - simpler can mean smarter.

One reader explained how the act of just committing to a schedule for their weight-lifting goal made it easier to follow through:

“People wanted to schedule things on Tuesday or Thursday night, I didn't have to think about it, I just knew the answer was 'no' because those were lifting nights.”

There are plenty of easy, user-friendly apps out there to help with scheduling. Our readers told us all about their favorites, from OmniFocus to OneNote to JotForm to Evernote.

Dr. Who has an app for that.

One person even told us that finding the right tech solution was the thing that convinced them they could make a resolution stick in the first place:

“I have learned to change my scripts from 'This habit isn't for me' to 'How can I make this habit for me?' And in that arena using tech is my usual go to.”

For others, good old-fashioned pen and paper (plus a laminator) is all it takes to get the job done:

“I had [my goals and targets for 2018] laminated and put it in my shower. The idea was to read it every morning and every night … Having the plan and seeing it daily kept me on track more than not having it at all.”

Hit your goal? Treat yourself.

Good old-fashioned bribery. It's simple, but it works - and many respondents said they put it to work to help them see their goals through.

One person told us how they built a reward system on their phone that transferred money into their bank account whenever they completed a positive behavior.

But rewards don't have to be monetary. For example, every time one respondent followed through on their goal to practice piano more regularly, they rewarded themselves with something simple, like a soda or a piece of candy.

And you can even get creative with this.

“In January, I used a random number generator to pick four numbers between 1 and 52 - I marked those weeks in my planner as 'reward' weeks,” said one respondent.

The randomized reward weeks added spontaneity and surprise along her path to reaching her goal.

Get your friends to ask you: “Hey, how's that goal coming?”

There's value in telling other people what you plan to do solo, according to our survey.

“I shared my goal with multiple friends who I knew weren't afraid to keep me accountable,” one person said. “After having a few of them check in with little to no progress made, it made me want to take a step in the direction of accomplishing the goal.”

Telling other people what you're trying to do doesn't have to mean putting pressure on them to keep you honest either.

“I made sure to tell people about my goal. Not that they would hold me accountable necessarily - but it made me feel like I owed it to them to keep my resolution.”

There's a caveat to having an accountability buddy: only 22% of readers who used this strategy actually succeeded in reaching their goal.

“My friend and I got gym memberships and agreed to start going 4 days per week,” said one person. “It started off well but then came scheduling conflicts and eventually he stopped coming. Guess what? Soon after I stopped going also.”

The takeaway: when you tap others to work toward goals together, things get complicated - you're only really as motivated as the least motivated person in your group. So don't depend on other people to BE your motivation. That's on you.

Learn how to create habits that stick for life

It's easy to be excited about new goals at the start of a new year, when everything is bright and shiny, and there are motivational posts coming at you from all sides amping you up.

But the real test is what you actually do in the boring, ordinary, unsexy everydays that come after.

And that's when things get tough.

One thing to remember - failing to create habits and meet goals is not about laziness. It's about not having the right systems in place to create your own success.

We've spent years studying the systems that set people up for success and put all of our best insights in our Ultimate Guide to Habits.

Enter your email below, and we'll send you the Ultimate Guide to Habits now.

19% of resolution-setters don't even know if they reached their goal last year is a post from: I Will Teach You To Be Rich.

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annaddendy-blog · 6 years ago

Text

19% of resolution-setters don't even know if they reached their goal last year

But just like there's more than one way to live a Rich Life, there's more than one way to think about what you do at the beginning of a year to set yourself up for success.

So the team at IWT was curious to hear what YOU think about New Year's resolutions.

Do you set them? What are they about? What do you do to set yourself up for success? DO you actually succeed?

Here's what they found.

A few of the key takeaways:

66% of you said you set a resolution for 2018. That's higher than the 44% of people setting New Year's goals this year, according to an NPR/PBS/Marist poll.

Of those who did set a resolution, 44% said they achieved it.

36% said they didn't quite get there.

20% said they weren't really sure whether they met their goal or not.

The most popular areas where you set resolutions were:

Career (23%)

Money (21.6%)

Fitness (16%)

The most popular system used to hit goals:

Creating a schedule (56%)

Getting an accountability buddy (28.5%)

Setting up rewards for yourself (29%)

“Why wait until January 1 to start something new?”

33% of people say they didn't set a resolution last year. The biggest reason: viewing the first of the year as some be-all-end-all of goal-setting is pointless.

“If you want to do something you should start doing it,” one person said. “Why wait until January 1 to start something new?”

That's fair. There are 365 days in a year - proclaiming January 1 THE day to set goals because that's when advertisers break out their best “New Year, New You” banner ads is pretty arbitrary.

And if you missed the New Year's deadline this year and wait all the way until next year to set goals for yourself, all you've really done is cost yourself 364 days when you could be taking action.

Need help following through on your goals whenever you set them? Check out this post on how to motivate yourself.

The “Big 3” resolutions: Career, money, fitness

We asked the 66% of respondents who did set resolutions last year to tell us which category their resolution fell under, and the top three were:

Career (23%)

Money (21.6%)

Fitness (16%)

Goal #1: Get out of a soul-sucking job

When it came to career-related resolutions, people talked a lot about wanting to advance in their career. And for most of them, moving up meant moving on.

So long, cubicle.

For some, that meant transitioning out of the corporate world to try their hand at freelancing. (Sound good to you? Learn how to start earning money on the side.):

Another reader told us about hatching a career plan with a friend over Facebook Messenger that they called “The Escape”:

Sometimes setting a goal and not quite getting there can be better than not setting a goal at all, since you still wind up farther along than where you started.

One person told us about the work they put into boosting their salary from their current $65K toward a $105K goal:

Plus, they're putting themselves in an even stronger position for 2019: “Next year, with my promotion, I am aiming for closer to $120K.”

If a pay raise is on your to-do list for 2019, check out our Ultimate Guide to Boosting Your Salary.

Goal #2: Break down money barriers and go after Big Wins

On the financial side of things, a big theme was taking control of financial situations on two fronts: getting out of debt, and boosting savings for retirement and other goals.

You can't print money. It's illegal. But you CAN take control of your finances by focusing on the Big Wins.

There's a limit to how much you can save, but there's no limit to what you can earn. If our survey responses are any indication, it's a lesson a lot of you have taken to heart.

One reader told us about their goal to add $100K to their net worth OUTSIDE their day job by the end of 2018:

On top of looking for ways to increase their earning potential, some respondents mentioned financial goals that involved changing their relationship to the money they already have.

For one person, that meant committing to a year of no shopping:

Goal #3: Putting that gym membership to use

On the fitness side of things, the big recurring theme was looking for systems and strategies that get you into the gym - even when every ounce of your energy is pulling you toward the couch.

Here's one respondent who was so determined to make fitness work for them, they picked up knife fighting. KNIFE FIGHTING!

“Fitness can be boring, so I committed to stick/knife fighting, which was lethally exciting enough to keep me engaged for a few months and build up some strength/endurance.”

She's talking about her workout routine, guys.

Somebody else shared how, after more than 10 years of making fitness their New Year's resolution - and falling short every time - they finally found a model that set them up for success:

The lesson here: If a goal is important to you, don't stop pushing because ONE strategy didn't work out. Regroup, rethink your approach - and then try again.

How to follow through: Set a schedule. Talk about it. Treat yourself.

Here's a rundown of the most popular ways respondents stayed on track to achieve their goals:

Created a schedule (56%)

Got an accountability buddy (28.5%)

Put a rewards system in place (16%)

Digging deeper, we found they're also the top three most effective at helping readers reach their goals:

Created a schedule (56% of successful people)

Got an accountability buddy (22% of successful people)

Put a rewards system in place (16% of successful people)

Put it in your calendar. Or … shower.

One reader explained how the act of just committing to a schedule for their weight-lifting goal made it easier to follow through:

“People wanted to schedule things on Tuesday or Thursday night, I didn't have to think about it, I just knew the answer was 'no' because those were lifting nights.”

There are plenty of easy, user-friendly apps out there to help with scheduling. Our readers told us all about their favorites, from OmniFocus to OneNote to JotForm to Evernote.

Dr. Who has an app for that.

One person even told us that finding the right tech solution was the thing that convinced them they could make a resolution stick in the first place:

“I have learned to change my scripts from 'This habit isn't for me' to 'How can I make this habit for me?' And in that arena using tech is my usual go to.”

For others, good old-fashioned pen and paper (plus a laminator) is all it takes to get the job done:

Hit your goal? Treat yourself.

Good old-fashioned bribery. It's simple, but it works - and many respondents said they put it to work to help them see their goals through.

One person told us how they built a reward system on their phone that transferred money into their bank account whenever they completed a positive behavior.

And you can even get creative with this.

“In January, I used a random number generator to pick four numbers between 1 and 52 - I marked those weeks in my planner as 'reward' weeks,” said one respondent.

The randomized reward weeks added spontaneity and surprise along her path to reaching her goal.

Get your friends to ask you: “Hey, how's that goal coming?”

There's value in telling other people what you plan to do solo, according to our survey.

Telling other people what you're trying to do doesn't have to mean putting pressure on them to keep you honest either.

“I made sure to tell people about my goal. Not that they would hold me accountable necessarily - but it made me feel like I owed it to them to keep my resolution.”

There's a caveat to having an accountability buddy: only 22% of readers who used this strategy actually succeeded in reaching their goal.

Learn how to create habits that stick for life

It's easy to be excited about new goals at the start of a new year, when everything is bright and shiny, and there are motivational posts coming at you from all sides amping you up.

But the real test is what you actually do in the boring, ordinary, unsexy everydays that come after.

And that's when things get tough.

One thing to remember - failing to create habits and meet goals is not about laziness. It's about not having the right systems in place to create your own success.

We've spent years studying the systems that set people up for success and put all of our best insights in our Ultimate Guide to Habits.

Enter your email below, and we'll send you the Ultimate Guide to Habits now.

19% of resolution-setters don't even know if they reached their goal last year is a post from: I Will Teach You To Be Rich.

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ournewsupdate-blog · 7 years ago

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Mobile Subscription Services - Don't Be Fooled!

I should admit that I have usually been a skeptic in terms of mobile subscription solutions. The concept of some intangible, unknown, and unreachable company/individual or factor, taking my dollars each and every day, week or month (based on the 'contract' entered into) has usually annoyed me. In actual fact, I do not even respond 'STOP' towards the advertising and marketing messages my bank sends me, just in case it turns out to become a ploy of sorts to get me to subscribe to a thing I did not want in the first place. Am I paranoid?

Perhaps...On the other hand, I like to assume that this is justified paranoia, based on the many complaints I have heard about mobile subscription services. It seems that so normally persons are 'fooled' into subscribing to one thing, which is then incredibly hard to terminate. If, like me, you share these sentiments then read on, as I've considering that found that it truly is not a lot mobile subscription services which can be the problem but rather uncouth ie. dodgy, service providers.

Having dug slightly deeper -in other words beyond the ads on Tv that inform me I ought to subscribe to get the latest love poems, horoscopes, dating recommendations, games, and farting monkeys - I've found that you'll find some pretty cool subscriptions available. Music subscriptions as an example, and they seem to be around the rise. In fact, Janus Fries, among the founders of Skype Technologies, is of the belief that, "The complete download model is going away." Now, regardless of whether we agree or not can be a discussion for yet another time, however, the point is that it's doable to subscribe to some cool stuff, if we just know what to look out for. And hey, if farting monkeys are what you're right after that is also fine, as long as you don't get fooled. So obtaining mentioned that, let's continue using the uncouth service providers....

The complications with mobile subscription solutions typically arise when service providers don't adhere to the guidelines regulating these services. In light of this I believed it'd be very good to list a few of the rules in this post, so as to give you a far better understanding of how mobile subscriptions are supposed to function. In accordance with WASPA (The Wireless Application Service Provider's Association), which to a large degree oversees our mobile industry, the following points has to be in place with any mobile subscription service:

Firstly, advertising material relating to subscription solutions requires to really clearly state that this can be in truth a subscription service, also as the cost of your subscription.

Secondly, the terms on the subscription need to be stipulated. In other words, is it a each day, weekly, or monthly subscription.

Thirdly, by law, mobile subscriptions need a double opt-in confirmation from anybody wanting to subscribe. In other words you'd want to obtain two SMS' to confirm that you truly need to mobilabonnement.

Fourthly, a monthly SMS reminder, which includes the cost and solution to unsubscribe, needs to be sent to each and every subscriber.

Fifthly, to unsubscribe, the subscriber should only have to SMS 'STOP' and the name of the service, to the quick code they initially subscribed to.

#mobilselskaber

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