#i don't think oafc's ending is as set up as i want because it is so long and i figured out and changed some things in the writing

[aparticularbandit]

I think

If I finish the chapter I'm in

That might be the last chapter?

And then the epilogue

And the Nagito chapters?

Maybe?

Maybe?????

[aparticularbandit]

i'm. overwhelmed is not the right word, but it's close to it, maybe.

because oaei is not short. i'm not going to pretend that it is.

but when i started oafc, the idea was for it to be roughly the same size. for them to be two halves of one whole.

and i'm nearly 55k in and it's nowhere near to. i'm eighteen chapters (and a prologue) in and it's nowhere near to.

there are so many more memories ryoko has and should recover.

she has more time to spend with the remnants as a group (she hasn't even met all of them yet, which is probably fine).

i haven't even gotten to junko meeting them in her memories or how she got them on her side or any of the things she did for that.

i still have the yasuke reveal (which is its own arc).

i still need to get back to kyoko.

intimidated is the word i was trying to think of.

there's just so much, y'all, and there's so much left to go, and i want to write it, and i'm excited to write it, and i know my end point and i'm writing towards that end point, and i know to let the story be as long as it needs to be to say what it wants to say.

but i think for me the rough part is constantly comparing it to oaei.

which is supposed to be the first half.

and is. not. half. of this story.

and i don't want what oaei is or sets up to get swallowed by what oafc is turning out to be.

because oaei is a very intentionally crafted enogiri fic.

and oafc is not that.

oafc is a okay, now it's time to talk about junko fic. and i feel like oaei sets the duology up as an enogiri series, and it's not.

the thin line duology is a junko duology. it is about junko. the enogiri is developed in oaei because it serves a purpose, because it is necessary to what junko is doing, and while it is the bulk of oaei, it's not the bulk of the duology.

the duology is about. junko.

and in that sense, they are two halves, even if one is longer than the other.

i just.

oafc was going to be the ryoko/mikan fic and i got here and it's actually so much more than that.

and that's not bad.

...i'm just running into the same issue of the later installment(s) is so much bigger than the earlier installment(s).

this happened with the soulmate timer au (yes, i have the fourth fic roughed out; yes, it's been roughed out for literal years at this point; yes, the fourth fic is just as if not longer than the other three fics put together, and each of those fics just got longer) and it happened with finding family (literally almost half of the chapters of that fic are in part five alone), and like.

idk.

it's overwhelming and it is intimidating and i hope that it's worth it to y'all to read through the whole thing when it's done - and i enjoy writing it! - but also like wow this is so much longer than i thought it was going to be and my brain still wants oafc to be as tight and compact as oaei is.

and then it's not and i start thinking about how much longer it might be and i just. a little. not panicked, that's not the right word either, but like.

there's just so much already and so much left and i feel a little anxious about it, actually.