#i don't remember first grade but i did play physically a lot when i was in preschool and kindergarten
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people on this website will make posts about things like having friends at school and running around and playing (physically. not on a wii or computer or phone) a lot as a child and every time i am forced to remember that the average tumblr user has more of a life than me
#xenon screams#i didn't really have a choice in having helicopter parents or avpd#but damn#wait#helicopter parent*#my dad's fine with me going outside#and i didn't get bullied either. what happened was i was ''''friends'''' with the most annoying person God has ever made me interact with#and im too much of a pushover to tell her to fuck off#so now i just don't talk to people#also ive just been tired since i was in 2nd grade#i don't remember first grade but i did play physically a lot when i was in preschool and kindergarten#id have probably played more if it weren't for the whole not allowed to go outisde thing#and it's not because we're in the usa#there are two playgrounds within a walking distance of the house i grew up in
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golden child part 3!!!<3
Golden Child | part 3
Summary: As your relationship with Pedro progresses, the relationship you have with your brother is in a limbo.
Warnings: cursing.
A/N: Hello, this was fun to write. Even tho it took me a lot more than I was expecting. Buuuut, I do hope you like this 😋💛
Also, special mention to @gadriezmannsgirl girly luv yu 💛
Part one | Part Two
"Tell me, where do you think all of this started?"
"The exact time?"
"No, but since you remember."
"I think I was six. Not sure, but I remembered that the first time I felt some kind of envy was when we got our grades back. She was the best of the three."
He paused for a moment. He was trying to remember, remember the way he felt.
"I tried my best, but that wasn't enough. No matter how much I studied, it did not matter. My mom asked my sister to help me with math one time, and I felt so stupid. I was the star on the field, but at home, I felt like I didn't matter."
"Do you think your parents focused more on your sister than on you?"
"No. Mom and dad dedicated all the time they had on the same level. They did what they thought was best. They worked so hard for us."
"And your other sister?"
"Aurora to me was a safe place." He smiles, thinking about her. "She was the shoulder to cry, the arms to go to after a good or bad day. She was home."
"I want to ask, do you feel you were outshine in your family? Not by mom or dad, by maybe the rest?"
"Well, I don't know if outshine is the term I'll go for. I think sometimes we were put against each other."
"In what way?"
"If I score at a game and got the team to win, my family was there to remind us that she was the best grade of all the cousins, siblings. But if she won a trophy for a science fair or something. They were there to congratulate me for the medal I got. Ignoring her."
"And how that made you feel?"
"Like I needed to win everything. Be better than her." He confesses, saying that outloud for the first time. "I wanted to feel like I was making them proud."
"You mentioned someone here, a friend from childhood. You blame her for making him leave. Why?"
"Arturo, he was my best friend. One night, he told me that he never wanted to see me or her again. He wanted nothing to do with us. And the commo denominator there was her."
"What happened after that?"
"I treated her like crap." He sighs, covering his face. "I used to be so mean, such and asshole."
"Elaborate on what you did to her."
"Bueno que también era un niño y no supe manejar mis emociones." (I was a kid who didn't control his emotions) he shrugs. "I used to pull her hair, I used to pinch her, I used to hurt her not only physically but emotionally. And I regret that."
"Why do you regret it?"
"Because I thought that hurting her was going to make me feel better. That's why I isolate myself from her. Because even though I felt good when I was a kid. It didn't as I grew up. And I was too dumb to recognize that."
"You told me that your sister Aurora tried to remedy things."
"She did. She used to play mediator with us, and at the time, I was fifteen. And I used to think that it was fun making her whine and cry. I thought it was a play from her. But I was only hurting our relationship more and more."
"And Aurora never told you anything in private?"
"She tried. But I cut her off leaving the room or not hearing her."
"Talk to me about the last fight."
"I got injured, right. So I needed to be taken care of, mom couldn't. Dad couldn't. Aurora couldn't. So, mom called her, and she helped me. But I-"
He takes a moment to continue. Lying was one thing, thing he thought was okay. Now that he admits he fucked up, it was a hard pill to swallow.
"I told my friends that she was my cousin. And while helping me, she and my friend Pedro got close during this time, Pedro told her about the lies I said. And she didn't say anything. Not to him, not to me. When he found out about it, he confronted me about it. And told me friends didn't lie to each other."
"Take your time. Breathe."
"I felt like the night Arturo left because of my sister. I went home, yelled at her, and well, hurt her."
"How do you feel now?"
"Como un hijo de puta, I feel so fucking bad, because my parents think it's on them, because Aurora can't even be around me, because Pedro and I don't even talk and because I think she will never speak to me in her life." (like an asshole)
"Okay, let's take a breath before continuing."
- three months later
"Pablo, are you joining us?" Javi asks him, entering the room without knocking. "Get up, let's go."
"No."
"Get your lazy ass up."
Javi grabs the pillow Pablo is using, hitting him with it.
"Con una mierda, Javi."
"Oh, don't get fussy, let's go. We're waiting for you."
"We? It's more like you 'cause Aurora is definitely not."
"If you're not down in five, I'll come back with ice cold water."
Pablo and Aurora haven't talked in months. She will do anything in her power not to talk with him. Asking his parents or boyfriend to deliver the message. Texting instead of talking. Everything.
You told her that was totally unnecessary, but she wanted to keep a silent vow. And she was doing such a splendid job in her brothers opinion.
"Hola."
Pablo noticed the way his sister quieted down once he joined. He hates it.
"Finally, we were about to leave." Javi says, excited to get the two siblings together. "Eat something, we're living in ten."
Aurora and Javi planned this hiking trip two weeks ago, but Javi wanted Pablo to join them, wanting to be the one to get these two on talking mode again.
When they left, Aurora was in charge of the music, always playing something she could sing, so she didn't give any opportunity for Pablo to engage.
The hiking was great. They were climbing this place that was open for hikers. The view was beautiful and the air was fresh.
"I want a picture of this view. It's amazing."
"So beautiful."
"Take a picture of me, please."
Aurora hands her phone to her boyfriend, but he has other plans. "Hey, I think I drop something. Pablo, take the picture, and I'll go search."
Before they could say anything, he ran a little away from them.
"Okay. Let me take that picture."
"No."
"Rora, por favor. It's just a picture."
She stares at him for a few seconds, handing the device into his hands. Pablo can't help but smile a little, taking the pictures.
"I been going to therapy." Pablo confess, he's proud of the progress he has made. "I've been constant and it's been so much help."
His parents agreed on not telling anyone, letting him choose who to tell. Aurora noticed some changes, mostly his attitude in the field. He was calm and not as aggressive as before.
"I'm sorry," he sighs. "What I did was wrong, the way I reacted. I hurt you, and I regret it."
"You not only hurt me."
"And I'm sorry for that too. But right now, I need to apologize to you."
Aurora stays quiet, a little too long for him to become nervous.
"You know I love you, cabezon." She hugs him. "And I know you're trying to be a better person. You're my baby, and I want the best for you and the best right now is what you're doing."
Javi is smiling from afar, seeing that his plan was successful.
- four months later
"Mami, please. I think I'm ready and I really need to do this."
"Pablito, sorry but no."
"Papá, please help me."
"Sorry, mijo, I'm with mom. We think it is too soon for you to do this."
He buffs, angry at the fact that his parents don't think he's ready to talk with you.
"Fine, I don't care."
But he cares, he wants to apologize, he wants to fix all the things he broke. The therapist told him that if he made a big progress, he had been working on himself.
His whole demeanor changed, and fans have noticed that. He was not that little bomb ready to go off with the minimum touch.
He still has that force and energy on the pitch. Just this time, he's controlling his reactions, choosing his battles.
The whole day, he spent it on his room. He was taking the weekend in Sevilla. He felt needy of love from his family. Needing some homemade food, some quality time with his father.
"Hey, cabezon. Dinner is ready."
"I'm not hungry."
"Pablo, what's going on?"
"I want to talk with Y/n, I feel ready to apologize. But mom and dad don't think the same."
"Ay pablito," Aurora patt his arm. "I know you feel ready, I really do. But in my opinion, you need a little bit more time."
"Just give me her number, please."
"Cabezon, we're not doing this. Let's go eat."
"I don't like you guys." He says, getting inside the bathroom.
- five months later
"Gavi, Pedri, Fermin." Xavi calls. "You're against Araujo, Ale and Robert."
"Pedri, do you wanna be on the center?" Fermin asks. "Let's do this, I'll go for Ronald, Pablo can attack Ale and you Robert, vale?"
Pedri and Gavi nod, positioning themselves next to each other. Since the last time they talked, Pedro was distant. If they had to talk, they did, but most of the time, Pedro would be next to Ferran.
The game was fun. The whole team had a good time. But in Pablo's mind, he needed to talk to Pedro, get on good terms with him.
He waited till the end of training, not wanting to ruin the mood. "Pedri"
"Mhm?"
"Can we talk? Please."
Pedro thinks about it for a while. He's not sure if it was the time or place. "Sure, let's just get a shower and then talk."
Pablo agrees, wanting to wait till the others are gone so they can talk alone with no one to bother them.
"Ferran, te veo en casa de Hector. Bye." (I'll meet you at Hector's)
"Okay, platanito. See ya. Bye Gavi."
Pablo waves him goodbye. He's anxious about the talk.
"So." Pedro says, taking the lead. "How are you?"
"Good, it's been good. Can't complain."
"That's great. I notice you're improving with the penalties."
"Yeah, getting better." He smiles. "How is your leg? How are you feeling?"
"So much better, thanks for the recommendation with the doctor. She's a life saver."
"The physio is the best, she knows how to create the best routines."
"And how is your family?"
"They're good, mom and dad are going on a little vacation, and Aurora is staying with me for a few days."
"Qué envidia, yo también quiero unas vacaciones." (What an envy, I want some vacations too) he laughs.
"How is she?" Pablo drops the bomb.
"She's fine."
They both stayed quiet, and the awkward moment grows by the minute.
"I need to ask you a favor."
"Pablo, I don't like where this is going "
"I need to talk to her. Por favor." He begged. "I really need this."
"No, hermano. I can't help you."
"Listen, I really need to speak with my sister."
"With who?" He asks, laughing, the bitterness of his tone is clear. "I thought that for you she wasn't your sister." Pedro, use the words Pablo told you.
You told him what happened after he insisted. You wanted to keep him away from the drama, but he wanted a new start with no lies.
He left Pablo alone in the dressing room. Angry but quiet. He can't deny the surprise he has at his friend being so calm.
- six months later
"I have something for you"
"Another gift?" You ask laughing. "Pedro, you really have to stop with the gifts."
"Never." He leans over to kiss you. "Te quiero." (I love you)
"Te quiero mucho más." (I love you so much more) You return the kiss, grabbing his cheeks to get him even closer. "What is that?"
He hands you the bag. The big white bow makes it look more fancy than it should.
"No, you didn't."
"I hope this covers my debt."
The dress he, in his own words, ruined with his drink at the party, that party where you shared your first kiss and the same night when he made you his own.
"Oh, Pedro!" You throw yourself at him. He receives you with open arms. "You're such a lover boy." Kissing his cheeks, making him laugh.
"I thought I was your golden boy."
"That too."
"C'mon, we don't want the lasagna to burn," He carries you bridal style back to the kitchen. "Again." He whispers the last part, mouth against your cheek, making you laugh.
"Okay, put me down." You kick your legs in the air. "Hey, tomorrow Aurora and I are going to go shopping. And I know your mom's birthday is coming, so tell me some ideas of what can I get her."
"I think she would want you to have dinner with her instead of a gift, mom is more family like, so yeah."
"Pepi." You sigh, "y si cago las cosas con tu madre?" (what if I fuck things up with your mom?)
"Deja de pensar eso. Mis padres te adoran, incluso les caes mejor que Fer." He laughs. (Stop thinking that. My parents love you. They even like you more than Fer.)
"That's good news then." You laugh with him. "Can I have her number then? So I can arrange something with her."
He nods, handing you his phone. The picture he has as a lockscreen is the two of you in a picnic he planned where he asked you to be his girlfriend.
Some fans noticed the new lockscreen and began creating some theories about who you were. You both were very careful with the fans and the pictures. You didn't want to be public, and he respected that. He was also being a very private person.
The two of you had dinner between laughs and funny stories that Pedro shared with you. You loved how he always plans nights with you even with the little time he has.
🔅🔅🔅
"Javi and I are staying at this amazing airbnb. I need some away time."
"But again, if I mention that I sleep over at Pedro's, you got all crazy."
"I'm not engaging in this talk." She says, walking away to another section of the store.
You both were shopping for her getaway trip, and you loved spending time with her. "Look at this." You grab a one piece that matches her style.
"When are you going back home?"
"Mmm, maybe during this break, I miss everyone. And my room."
You keep looking for something you can get, not liking much of the store.
"I want to ask you, mom, and I are planning this dinner for dad's birthday." She says slowly. "And mom wants to do it at Pablo's. If we decide to make the party there, would you come?"
"I don't know." You mumble. "If it's for him, I would go. You know I don't have a problem with Pablo."
"But?"
"But I don't want to he a burden or create drama."
"You don't create drama Y/n, he does. He always does."
"Always is a little dramatic. He's dumb but not that dumb." You roll your eyes at her.
"A veces creo que eres demasiado buena para todo lo que te ha pasado." (Sometimes I think you're too kind for everything you been through)
"Am I supposed to let this be my villain story?"
"No." She laughs. "Well, to me, that would have been the beginning."
You finish shopping some outfits she put together. Moving yourselves to the food area.
"How are you and Pedro doing?"
"We're good." You blush at the thought of him. "I can't deny you that I'm falling in love with him."
Aurora screams, making some people turn to her. "Rora, stop." You cover your face.
"I can't help it, I've been waiting for this moment since we were kids, and we talked about getting married at the same time in a candy castle."
"A veces te pasas un poco, Rora." (You're a little too much sometimes)
🔅🔅🔅
"Can you turn the AC off? Or pass me your shirt?" You say, getting you head up off the pillow. "Please, it's cold."
"I like you more without it." He walks back to the room with a wet cloth in his hands. He cleaned you slowly, kissing your knees. When he's done he throw the cloth somewhere around his room. He gets back in bed with you. "I love you."
"I love you too." You kiss his cheek, caressing the other one with your tumb. "But turn the AC off."
"Luego me pediras volver a encenderlo" (you will ask me to turn it back on)
He turns on a movie, arms never leaving you. His way of aftercare is touch. He likes being close to you, hands up and down your back, lips on your forehead, hearts in syntony.
This time was no different, one hand on your head, massaging your scalp. Loving the little sounds of satisfaction you make.
His other hand is on you back, drawing little nothings into you. Loving the heat of your body in the cold room.
You kiss his jawline, the raspy feeling on your lips is intoxicating, something you love feeling every time you kiss his cheeks or his jawline.
The movie was playing in the back, you humm the song that's playing in the soundtrack. Lips glued to his skin and hands on his chest, his heartbeat can be felt.
"Let's go to Tenerife this weekend." He breaks the silence between you. "El Mister nos dio cinco días luego de haber ganado. Así que podemos ir por tres o cuatro días si tu quieres." (Mister gave us five days after the win we got, so we can go for three or four if you want)
"Actually, I want to tell you something. I need your opinion."
He waits for you to tell him. You're not sure if bringing the topic is tue right thing to do.
"Mom and Rora are planning this birthday dinner for my dad, and I'm not sure if I want to go."
"You don't want to go to your father's birthday?" He lifts his eyebrows in surprise. "Why?"
"Not that I don't want to go, I do." You sigh tired. "But the thing is that they're hosting the dinner at Pablo's."
He only hummed, not sure what to answer. He's not one to tell you not to go or to force you to go if you don't feel good doing it.
You free yourself from his hold, sitting and looking for his t-shirt. He stretched to the floor, reaching for his shirt and handing it to you.
"I'm undecided." You pouted. "I told Aurora that I want to go, but I'm not sure if Pablo wants me there."
Pedro scratched your back in a confort way. He does this as a way to let you know that he's there and he hears you.
"I don't want any drama, especially not on his birthday."
He thinks about that time in the dressing room when Pablo told him about needing to speak with her.
He didn't tell you about it, mostly because he didn't want you to get triggered about it.
"Pepi," you call him. Taking him out of his thoughts. "Are you okay?"
"I have to tell you something."
You waited a few seconds, but after the seconds turned into minutes you decide to ask him.
"Tell me what?"
"Pablo and I talked."
"Okay, about what?"
"Nada, quiere hablar contigo pero le he dicho que no." (Nothing, he wants to talk with you, and I told him no)
"When did this happen?"
He sighs, not wanting to admit that he hid this from you. "Like a month ago."
You turn to him, his hand rubbing his eyes. "A month?"
You tried to process everything. Pablo was looking to reach you out. "Pedro, por qué no me dijiste?" (why didn't you tell me?)
"I'm honestly not sure, I wanted to, but I just forgot."
"You forgot?" You scuff. Se te olvidó decirme que Pablo está buscándome? Y tu le dijiste que no?" (You forgot to tell me that Pablo was looking for me? And you told him no?)
"I'm trying to protect you."
"Mi amor, you should have told me."
You stayed quiet, both of you did. The only sound is the movie still playing.
Your mind is running a thousand miles per minute, questioning everything. Your forehead frowned.
Your eyes look for Pedro's eyes, his eyes glued to the ceiling. Your expression softens. You know he's very protective.
You stretch your arm, hand grabbing his chin to make him look at you. "Thank you, honestly." You smile. "I know you wanted to protect me, I love you."
His hands reach for yours, bringing it to his lips. "Te quiero, preciosa. I promise I didn't mean to keep this, I just didn't find the right time to tell you."
He opens his arms for you. Smiling sweetly, that smile that you can't say no to. You fall into his arms.
"I don't like when you're sad, and I didn't wanted you to feel forced to talk with him when you weren't ready."
"Stop, I get it." You kiss him to stop him from speaking again. "Does Saturday, Sunday, and Monday sound good to you?"
Hie frowns in confusion, not getting what you mean. "What?"
"You said five days. And the dinner is on Friday so we can visit Tenerife for three days and come back so you can rest on the fifth day."
"Mirame." He says, releasing his grip on you. "You're the best, and I hope you know that you will have to die in order for me to let you go."
"And I hope you know that even if I die, I'll come back to get you and kill you to be with you as ghosts together."
He grabs your cheeks, slamming his lips into you. "Wait." He breaks the kiss. "Would you be nice to me when you kill me?"
"Mmm, not sure. If you make me feel good right now, I'll consider it." You joke, smiling as you sit on his lap, your lips looking for his.
- 30 hours before the party
You stood in front of the door. Code already in, but you can't seem to open it.
"Are you okay?" Aurora asks, she's behind you waiting for you to enter.
You nod. You're not sure if you're really okay. You want to stop thinking of the fight. The memories make your head hurt.
"Hey!"
You turn your head to your boyfriend. Pedro drove you and Aurora to Pablo's House. He wanted to make sure you felt comfortable.
"Hey." You whisper, head inside the window car.
"You don't have to if you don't want to." He reminds you something Aurora told you.
"I want to."
"Okay, I'm going to be around here. If you need me, call me."
You smile, walking fast to his side of the car. "I love you. Please don't park a street away and pretend you were somewhere else."
"Ay Joder, you ruined my plans."
After a kiss goodbye and he promising not stalking from afar. You stand next to Aurora. She opens the door and grab your hand to walk inside.
"Pablo!"
You grab the bag of groceries she has in her hands. Walking to the kitchen to leave them there.
"Someone wants to see you."
"Really, who?"
The steps coming closer to the kitchen are making you nervous. Even when Aurora told you to be calm and that nothing was going to happen, you can't help the feeling.
"You coming?"
You grab her hand, squishing it in a way of comfort. His back is facing you. Even his back has this towering feeling.
"Cabezon," Aurora says, catching his attention.
When he notices you, his whole face changes. His expression is softer, but still having his signature frown.
"Voy a dejarlos solos, así pueden hablar. Estaré arriba." (I'm going to leave you two alone. So you can talk. I'll be upstairs)
The silence is thick. The whole thing was uncomfortable for the two of you.
"I like your shirt." You say, not sure on what else to say.
"Thanks, mom got it for me on my birthday."
"Right. Well, happy belated birthday."
"I still have some candy in the freezer if you want. You like it."
"No, I don't." You shake your head no at the thought.
"You don't? What about all the times you used to freeze the candies when we were kids?"
"Pablo." You sigh. "The one that likes frozen candy is you, I used to freeze it for you, not because I was eating it."
"Oh." He joined his lips, and bit from the inside, thing he does when he's nervous. "I want to say that I'm sorry."
You squeeze your eyes. Was he saying it because he felt it or because mom told him to?
"I made a mistake. And I blame hurted you in a way I never meant to." He walks closer to you. "I'm really sorry, you didn't deserve the way I treated you, the way I hurted you."
"You told me that you hate me." You walk past him to the other side of the room. "And that I'm not a sister to you."
"And I regret doing that. I was wrong."
"You hurt me, and I'm not talking about the things that happened that day, I'm talking about everything you did to me."
"I was angry at you!"
"Why?" You say matching his tone. "To my knowledge, I've done nothing wrong."
"Eras tan jodidamente perfecta y todos te querían." (You were so fucking perfect and everyone loved you) he finally says. "You were the favorite in school. You were so good at everything. And then our family used to be like 《oh but Pablo is only good at football. She's the best at every other thing》 I could help it, I was dying out of envy. I wanted to be you."
You stayed quiet. You knew he didn't like it when family members compared the two of you. Your mom tried to stop it, always reminding him that you were two different people.
"Pablo." You tried to get closer. "You didn't have to be me. You were amazing."
"You're just saying that to make me feel better."
"Pablito, come here." You open your arms to him.
For the first time in so long, you hug him, his arms squeezed you, his head on your shoulder.
"I need you to believe me. You were and are amazing. Look at you, playing on the team of your dreams, with the national selection. I wish you would have told me this before."
"I'm sorry, I was so angry at you."
"I'm not perfect, Pablo." You caress his back, trying to calm him down. "I'm so far from being perfect. And you know that."
"Well, you don't know how to cook rice."
"Shut up, you eat it."
"No, but I'm really sorry. I don't hate you, and you are my sister."
"It's okay, Pablito."
"No, it's not.' He break the hug. "I was so wrong, all this years. I'm sorry I hurt you, I'm sorry for all these years."
"It's okay. We have time to fix this. We can do this together."
"Te quiero, en serio lo hago. Even tho you burn the rice." (I love you, I really do). He says, laughing. "Please, forgive me."
"Te quiero también, siempre lo haré." (I love you too, always do) you hug him again. Enjoying the feeling.
- three days later
"I want to be a mermaid." You laugh as Pedro splash some water on your face. "You definitely be the crab."
"The crab taking care of the very pretty mermaid?"
"I'll make you take care of a manatee."
"Are there any manatees in Spain?" He asks, confused. "Never seen one."
"You're so weird, but I love you like that." You hug him from behind, using him as a personal flootie.
You spent more time in the water, enjoying the vibe of the island. The sun, the air. Everything with him.
"Mamá nos hizo sus famosas croquetas, así que al fin las probaras." (mom made us her famous croquettes. You're finally trying them)
"Maybe I like them more than I like you." You laugh, grabbing his hands and bringing him close. "Or maybe I'll seal the deal with her over her son."
The kissing didn't last long, as Fer went looking for you to bring you over to the tasca.
"Fer, when are you introducing me to your girlfriend?"
"When he finds one." Pedro laughs.
"Hey!" Fer says, poutting. "That's mean."
🔅🔅🔅
The sun is setting, leaving this magical orange tone in the sky. You smile for the picture, Pedro insisted on taking a picture of you.
"You look amazing."
"Take a picture with me."
"Always."
His lips on yours, making you feel like drunk in love.
"You have no idea how in love I am with you." He says, eyes shining with honesty. "I got to thank Pablo for getting injured."
You laugh at his joke. "We got to thank him."
"No, but really. I love you to a way I never thought I would, even if we haven't been together for that long. Your eyes, your hair, your heart, the way you laugh, or the way your eyes shine when you talk about what you love, the way you always make sure everyone is comfortable. The way you love your family. The way you love my family, how you're with Fer. You're just you. And I'm thankful for that.
You feel like crying. Nobody ever loved you the way that he did, never sharing a love so pure and so great.
"And you are you. For me, it's the way you love football, the way you love your mother's food, how funny you are, and how much you turn into a little kid every time we joke around. How much do you work and get better at everything you do. Your accent is beautiful, your love for your family, for your brother, and your love for me. Because I never thought I would find someone like you."
- two months later (Barça vs. RMA)
"I bet that goal was for me." Fer jokes, making you laugh. "The eyes were looking at me."
"Definitely, I think the wink and the kiss were a symbol of brotherhood."
"I hate that you follow my jokes." He shoves you delicately. "Like, get angry or something."
"Don't even try. We grew up with that." Aurora says, pointing at Pablo. "So, not a chance, she's well trained."
"Yeah, the only one who has to worry here is Chris. She's the one that has to put up with him."
"I'm not sure myself." She laughed at the jokes.
Chris is Pablo's girlfriend. He introduce her to Aurora and to you a few weeks ago, and you now bring her around everywhere like a little sister.
The referee announces the end of the match, and the team won. It was a good day for everybody.
"Let's go, señoritas." Fer gets up, offering his arm to you.
"Let's go, señorito." You joke with him.
You waited by the car, talking about the meal Fer prepared before the match and was waiting for you at home.
"Hello, hello." Aurora say to Pedro and Pablo.
"Omg, you guys did amazing!" You hug Pedro, kissing his cheek. "Congratulations, baby."
"Yeah, yeah, kiss kiss, let's go home, I'm hungry."
"You're just jealous of her." Gavi jokes, hitting Fer in the head. "She got your brother."
"I was his go-to, now I'm the seconds one." He fake cries. Making you all laugh.
"And I got your sister." Pedro shoves Gavi's arm playfully.
"Yeah, you better take care of her. If not, you saw how I shoved Vini? That would be you."
"Okay, stop it. Let's go."
You start walking toward Pedro's car, hand in hand with him while Fer was telling him something.
"Oye," Gavi shouts. Making you all turn. "Me darás mi abrazo?" (Do I get a hug, too?) You let go of Pedro's hand, running to your brother. "Venga."
You land in his arms, squeezing him. "I love you, Pablito."
"And I love you." He kisses your cheek, letting you go. "Let's go, I want some of that burned rice."
"Hey!" Fer says, "my rice is not burnt." He makes Pablo and you laugh.
🔅🔅🔅
🏷: @gadriezmannsgirl @percysley @jajajhaahaha @cinderellawithashoe @alwaysclassyeagle @christianpulisic10 @utdmount @lilians17 @urmotheris
#football fanfic#football#football angst#football x you#football drabble#football smut#pedri#pedri x reader#pedri gonzalez#pedri x y/n#pedri x you#pedri x gavi#pedri angst#pedri smut#pedri imagine#pedri icons#pedri drabble#pedri headcanon#pedri barça#gavi x reader#gavi imagine#gavi#gavi angst#gavi barca#gavi headcannon#pablo gavi#barca#fc barcelona#fc barca
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other talent swaps form this au and explanation for each one... idk if im going to do anything serious with it, so consider it just a "what if"
stars of the show:
David Chiem, Ultimate Student;
Min Jeung, Ultimate Motivational Speaker.
David was a curious child, but he lost his spark very fast. He always knew that if he wants to be loved he needs to be the best. In order to be an ideal for everyone and to escape his emotions and feelings, David only studied. In middle school his impressive grades caught attention of XF-ture Tech. They offered him to make a contract and take part in the Ultimate Student exam.
Min was originally one of the Ultimate Student exam participants, but a person form XF-ture Tech who was watching over her noticed that she wants to "save" and help people. They offered her to be a motivational speaker, with them as her manager of course. On the first year of high school Min received the title of the Ultimate Motivational Speaker.
they probably knew each other before the killing game, because they both work with XF-ture.
Teruko Tawaki, Ultimate Zither Player;
Alexander "Xander" Matthews, Ultimate Lucky Student.
After Teruko's brother were adopted, she decided that she will be a musician because music is the only thing left that reminded her of him, along with his handmade zither. She doesn't trust people much because they had always left her. Teruko says it's just her luck.
Xander's family died when he was a child, but he couldn't accept this and ran away from his town, so he never had a proper home since then. He wholeheartedly believes that he should've died instead, but he can't because things will never go as he wants. Xander's wounds are always open, no matter how long ago he got them.
Ace Markey, Ultimate Bowler;
Arei Nageishi, Ultimate Jockey.
All of Ace's siblings already took other sports, and he believes that he will never be as good as them. But bowling was Taylor's favorite sport, which inspired him a lot. After his friend's death, Ace started to take out all of his anger when playing. Who could've knew that it will make him the best?
All in Arei's family were jockeys, so she had to be one too to fit in. This made her life even worse, but she wanted to destroy her sisters lives by becoming the best and ruining their careers. And she did exactly that. But was it really worth it?
Charles Cuevas, Ultimate Plastic Surgeon;
Rose Lacroix, Ultimate Personal Stylist.
Charles saw how his brother died, and even though he doesn't remember anything about him, he still has the same feeling he had when he saw Elliot's face- he couldn't even tell if it was him anymore. Charles neglected everything that he didn't need for being a plastic surgeon just so others would never had that feeling.
Because Rose's family owns a hair salon, she had always been in the fashion world. She remembers all looks that she ever saw. Her ability to read people by the clothes that they wear helps her a lot, since she can't remember anything besides the visual part.
Hu Jing, Ultimate Art Forger;
Eden Tobisa, Ultimate Matchmaker.
Hu has problems with proving herself to others. She was interested in art, but she think of herself as "the worst in the world in a thing that I can do the best". Because of that she decided that people would see her as worthy enough if she copies others. Hu is ashamed of her talent, but it's still the only thing she's good at.
Eden believes that Love is the most important feeling in the world, so she wants to help other people find it. However, she can never find her Love herself. Eden doesn't like to think about it, so she only thinks about others.
Levi Fontana, Ultimate Pet Therapist;
Arturo Giles, Ultimate Rebel.
Levi decided to work with animals because they don't have weird secret social rules that people do. His family hated animals, though. It's good they're not here to spread hate anymore, right?
Arturo's parents were physically (towards him) and emotionally (towards Felicity) abusive. He ran away and never came back, leaving his sister alone with shitty parents and bullies at school, which completely destroyed her. Felicity wrote a letter to her brother and after committed suicide. Blaming himself for this, Arturo decided that he won't let something like this happen again. But in the end of the day he is still just a coward running away from his problems, isn't he?
Veronika Grebenshchikova, Ultimate Chemist;
J Moreno, Ultimate Clockmaker.
Chemistry is fascinating for Veronika. It's not boring- there's so many different reactions, so many things to explore. Her speciality is poisons, because everything about them is just amazing. Veronika seems to have a lot of burns. Wonder why.
J doesn't want to be associated with show business at all. Making and restoring clocks is calming, it has mechanisms that she loves, she can forget about everything when she works and no one sees her.
Whit Young, Ultimate Horror Fanatic;
Nico Hakobyan, Ultimate Effect Artist.
After Whit's mother died, he couldn't accept the reality, so he tried many things to escape it, but the only thing that helped him is Horror, because scenes in them overlay Whit's memories about his mother. But they are still deep inside, aren't they?
Nico doesn't like to be in public, so they work behind the scenes. It's better when no one sees them. And even though they still have to talk with performers, Nico knows that they probably won't see each other in person ever again. How long can they hide?
I just realized I made Xanvid Terumin omg it was not intentional I swear 😭😭 anyway I hope you liked it. should I post more about this au? I lied when I said I won't to anything serious with this btw. or not.
that's it yeah byeee
#drdt au#drdt#david chiem#min jeung#teruko tawaki#xander matthews#ace markey#arei nageishi#charles cuevas#rose lacroix#hu jing#eden tobisa#levi fontana#arturo giles#veronika grebenshchikova#j rosales#j moreno#whit young#nico hakobyan
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hey i couldn't sleep so i decided to make one of those ask game things if anyone wants to send in numbers and/or invite their followers to send them numbers instead
do you carry around a bag when you're out and about? if so, what's usually in it?
describe your perfect first date.
guilty pleasure?
which fictional character archetype do you think fits you best?
what do you think others would consider your most distinguishable physical feature(s)?
what role do you play in your group of friends?
when was the last time you said something you regretted?
do you typically remember your dreams if you have them?
who is your biggest inspiration?
any unusual fears?
favorite myth?
when was the last time you were truly angry?
best compliment you've ever received?
which color of the sky is your favorite?
favorite font?
is there anyone you’re not biologically related to that you consider "family"?
what's your go-to funny story when people ask you to tell one?
what's your most controversial opinion?
what's been keeping you up at night lately?
do you have any ocs? if yes, talk about them a little.
do you believe in extraterrestrial life?
how old were you when you joined the internet?
what's popular with the people around you that you can't seem to get behind?
what would you consider part of your personal aesthetic?
do you collect anything?
would you enjoy being famous?
how liberally do you use the block button when browsing social media? does it differ depending on the site?
if you could travel back to any one point in time, where and why?
how many different names do you go by across the internet?
what’s your type?
does your favorite movie/game/book from when you were young still hold up in quality?
were you raised religious?
have you ever thought about changing your name?
any allergies?
what would your warning label say if you had one?
what's the most expensive thing you've ever spent money on?
any oddities when it comes to you personal belief system?
what is your love language?
do you still know your best friend from grade school?
if you could dye your hair any color, what would you pick?
has anyone ever told you they like your shoelaces in public? if yes, how did you respond?
how did you meet your best friend(s)?
do you play any instruments?
do you have any blorbos?
do you believe in fate?
do you follow any stereotypes of groups you're a part of?
how well-decorated is your bedroom?
you get to give a one-sentence note to yourself from a decade ago. what does it say?
if you're trying to make friends online, what's your typical approach for reaching out?
what do you consider most important in a romantic/platonic partner?
if you had the ability to change one aspect of yourself, what would it be?
what the best anon hate you've ever received?
favorite emoji?
what's the boldest thing you've ever done?
do you prefer having a few close friends or a lot of not-so-close ones?
nosiest question you've ever been asked?
favorite movie?
how many languages do you speak?
how much of yourself do you wear on your sleeve?
what's your go-to plan to destress?
do you believe in/follow any superstitions?
what do you think you’re most known for as a person?
how did you come up with your url?
what's the best thing you can cook?
do you have a Signature Outfit™?
what’s been the biggest hurdle you’ve faced in your life so far?
what's your favorite obscure piece of media?
what's the most recent entry in your notes app?
favorite song?
when it comes to affection/intimacy, do you prefer to stick to one person or are you more open about it?
did you have an imaginary friend as a kid?
which is more important when it comes to clothing, comfort or style?
what would you consider the most enjoyable accent to listen to?
favorite time of year?
how would you describe your favorite person?
do you like the height you are now, or do you wish you were taller/shorter?
what's your plan for the apocalypse? (don't pretend you haven't thought about it a little bit.)
favorite food?
who do you look to for guidance in times of need?
which you can spend a day each in five different places across the globe. where do you travel?
favorite memory?
favorite meal?
favorite pick-up line, if you're into that sort of thing?
favorite word?
are you on good terms with your family?
if you were given $1mil on the basis that you had to put towards something arbitrary and self-indulgent, what would you spend it on?
where’s "home"?
how fucked is your sleep schedule?
if you could keep any animal as a pet, what would you choose?
weirdest habit?
what's a common misconception people have about you?
who's in your dream blunt rotation?
favorite game?
if you could have any superpower besides the typical choices (flight, shapeshifting, elemental powers, etc.), what would you pick?
have you ever written any poetry? if so, what was it about?
favorite quote?
what's your lucky number(s)?
favorite color?
is there anything you would consider yourself an expert at?
do you believe in something beyond death?
#ask game#ask bait#ask me anything#i wrote up the questions and then randomized the order that's why there's no real correlation from one to the next#250#500#pepper.txt
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15 questions + 15 friends tagged by @nougatbit
1. Are you named after anyone?
i don't think so but as far as i can retrace my name it's greek, somehow ended up in russia and then was made popular outside of russia via doctor zhivago's lara/larissa... (still have to read that!)
2. When was the last time you cried?
I cried from an allergy i have to certain skin cremes last night at the cinema... apart from that i don't remember atm but certainly not long ago
3. Do you have kids?
nope
4. What sports do you play/ have you played?
i did swimming when i was like 14 (i still like swimming a lot but i'm not in a club or anything anymore)
5. Do you use sarcasm?
no :-)
6. What is the first thing you notice about people?
this has always been a weird question to me... their??? face?!?!! (*laughs nervously* wouldn't that always be the first thing to notice about someone???)
7. What's your eye color?
blue
8. Scary movies or happy endings?
a weird opposition. i don't really like horror movies and i prefer the ending a story needs and deserves, so some stories (e.g. a story on two traumatised young men who love and need each other more than anything or anyone else in the world in a mediocre prime time crime show) certainly deserve a happy end, other stories (e.g. a film that displays some severe social grievances) often should not have a happy ending because there isn't one to be expected in reality either... except for sometimes, for example, when it is about two queer men in 1913 Britain, finding and loving each other against all odds and all social norms, written by a gay man in the same era, then of course a happy ending can be imperative even :-)
9. Any talents?
people don't tire to tell me how ~creative i am... and that despite my apparent total lack of (visual, auditory, sensory) imagination 🙃 so there's that
other than that... i think i am good with words and i write since i literally can write and nothing brings me more joy than having written.. writing has been like the most important thing in my life for 26 years now even though it has always been something that happens more like 'in the background' of everything else
10. Where were you born?
in one of the (imo) most village-like "Großstädte" of Germany... if i told you where you'd probably know it because of one specific thing... i've been all the way to other continents and people knew it just because of that
11. What are your hobbies?
most hobbylike things are probably analogue photography, building stuff around the house (shelves etc.) and going to the cinema (or like film in general)
12. Do you have any pets?
no, but i had mice and i miss them... if i had more time and more space to have an adequate place to keep them i'd like to have mice or rats again...
13. How tall are you?
1,73
14. Favorite subject in school?
hm. not sports. i had a 'compulsory optional course' in physics/informatics and i always say it changed my life bc that's where i understood that i like and am good at technical and computer stuff... i also liked pedagogy (nrw superiority), the obligatory history course in 12th grade specifically and in the last years also maths... god do i miss solving math problems 😭😭
15. Dream job?
i wrote this in my friends journal when i was like 10 and it is still true but i think i am a bit past the point where this will ever happen but it's 'director ' (of films)... but that involves networking and other people and putting yourself out there... and uh... i just don't see that happening (i have directed but not in the slightest professionally), the other one of course has always been 'author' and i guess that could still happen... someday in the future maybe... you know, when I'm a grown-up
tagging: @diersten @tiny-steve @sinnsenke @mcfif @black-cat-aoife @silverysnake @free-piza @lachricola
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💭
For the Fanfic Writer Ask Game :3
💭 What inspires you and your writing? (from this post)
ooooh tough one! thank you, i like the challenge of this question!
as i think back to my literal earliest writings at age 6, 8, 9 and into the teenage years and finally adulthood is when i really started writing.... there's a lot. at the core though, is emotion. and a desire i suppose to tell a story.
the first thing i can truly consider my own was a homework assignment at age 8 that my mom did not proofread before i handed it in. it received the highest grade and the teacher read it aloud to the class and asked me this very question: how did i do it? (you know... this may subconsciously be why i adore writing prompts. it was a single sentence prompt we were given to write from. heheh.)
anyway, i remember answering that i wrote what i saw. some of it was what i physically saw, and then some was imagined based on the actual scene. but i could see it in my mind's eye; i could see the story and feel the emotions surrounding it.
even though all i post is fanfiction, i did write some original stories here and there a long time ago. tiny things, like the school assignment. again they're all from a place of emotions i relate to... experiences i've had or that i want to have... that's part of the imagination piece. things i have read before in other stories, or imagine to be real based on things i've heard described, pictures i've seen...
so then we come to fanfiction. when it's character-driven as nearly all of my pieces are... and i'm thinking back here to my earliest fanfic writings (which are handwritten and unfinished lol oops) it was all in the end to tell something deeper of the soul... to grasp onto some depth of emotion that i know i myself crave.... or if not something i crave specifically, just seeking to feel...
that description is rather reminding me of what i hear people say about drug addictions. seeking the next high, you know? and you gotta go deeper each time or something, to find the satisfaction. i suppose there's an element of that in there as well. writing is a bit of transparency in that...i guess i'm seeking something i don't have. usually it's a depth of relationship, a seeking to be known and to know another. up until i wrote drakken/shego fanfic i really did not write romance at all. i was always going after the platonic soulmate vibe. sometimes that depth of knowing can get lost in a romance vibe i think?
but anyway... yes... what inspires me? a craving for more. i write for that emotional depth. that next high. but also the adventure... the seeking of something beyond the walls of....existence. oh to be able to just say... let's go explore that cave in the east that has its own weather system! let's go explore the amazon! the sahara! let's drift on a gondola in the canals of venice on a moonlit night! let's look down on the earth from a plane at 35000 feet and see what God and man have wrought!
man idk if that answers this well enough. i guess also unanswered questions? in fanfic, for characters. like, what happened to adam cartwright after he moved away and how did it impact each family member? what happened after the end of quantum leap?? is h.m. murdock truly insane? why did spock really leave starfleet? what else motivates sonic the hedgehog? why did shego abandon heroism and become a villain? will dr. drakken become a good guy post-canon or will he remain in evil?? what truly happened between stein and spirit to break up their partnership yet cause them to pick up right where they left off fifteen years later???
it's always...missing pieces, and always connected to emotion... yeah again, idk if this answers the question well enough. but my gosh you've got me buzzing. maybe this will kickstart my writing drive again cuz i let it go dormant to play sims 24/7 for a month.
thank you friend, for the ask! ^^
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(So you know how this
is a Thing in the Disgaea series? Wanted to do something with that in the SMG AU but make it Not A Joke.)
While relaxing at home, Shantae hears a knock on her lighthouse's front door, "Coming!"
As she walks over, she wonders who could be visiting this late in the evening. It probably wasn't either of her SMGs, seeing as they'd already had an incident involving Ammo Baron and an unusually large Egg (the capitalization there is important) and filled their Wacky Misadventure quota for at least the next few days. And her canon friends all usually had their own things going on at home right about now.
Well, no more time to speculate. She opens the door with a hopefully-not-too-wide smile (Avatar-grade GMod physics are a real bitch sometimes), "Good evening! What can I...do...uh..."
She's stunned speechless by who she finds; a very tall, very attractive woman who is also very clearly Laharl! She does her best to look up at them, and then very quickly further up when she underestimates the height difference. 'Ohhh, mother have mercy do NOT oogle your genderbent mean demon friend We Have Sexy Zombie Girlfriend at Home.'
For their part, Laharl looks uncharacteristically nervous, or at least is uncharacteristically not hiding their nerves behind either aloofness or rage, "Hi Shantae. If you're not too busy I was hoping for some magic advice?"
'Okay, friend needs help. That I can work with.' "Of course! Come on in."
The two head inside and into the living room, with Shantae settling into a chair while Laharl takes the couch.
"So, what kind of advice where you looking for?"
"Well, uh...I'm guessing you've noticed I look different right now?"
'Different is certainly right.' "Well, I wasn't gonna say anything but...wait, I think I remember this from your games. Did you get stuck like this again from a SMG adventure or something? 'Cause I definitely know a few tricks to make a transformation revert."
There's a flash of...relief? embarrassment? something across their face before they go back to nervous, "Oh, you know where it's from. That makes things easier. And ah, no, dispelling it isn't the problem, I actually changed on purpose this time and I already know the counterspell. I was actually wondering if you know how to modify a transformation."
'Huh, okay then.' "Yeah, I've done that before. Not sure how compatible our magic systems are, but I can at least tell you what works for me. So, what kind of changes are we looking for? Hair color, shoe size, you wanna add wings or a tail?"
"Ah, nothing that drastic, I really just...just want it to feel...more like "me," I guess..." Despite how much taller they are than usual, they quickly curl in on themselves as they say this, suddenly seeming smaller than she's ever seen them.
'Oh...ohhhh.' "This...isn't the first time you've used this form on purpose, is it?"
"...No. I ah, I don't use it very often, there's a lot about it that's honestly a bit much, especially given...well, if you've played the games you probably know about a particular phobia of mine?"
"Yeah...That. That boss fight really hit different after I actually met you."
"Right, so this?" they gesture to their chest, "Does not work for me. Plus it just generally feels like some...some stupid exaggerated fanservicy parody of me. Which makes sense since that's all it was really supposed to be but like, come on!"
"Trust me, I get it. But, you're using it anyway?"
"Yeah, well...at certain points being mildly uncomfortable like this is still an improvement over my boy form."
"About that, I've been using 'they' for you in my head since you got here since I wasn't really sure what was going on. Would you prefer 'she,' or..."
Laharl finally fully relaxes at that, her presence once again filling the room like it usually does, "Yes, please do."
"No problem. Now, to start off, we'll probably want to get you down to your usual age...wait, are you older right now? 'Cause it kind of seems like it, but with how much is different I'm not sure."
She tilts her hand in a 'so-so' gesture, "Kind of? It's-so I'm guessing you know how I got this form the first time?"
"Flonne's angel world flowers, right?"
"Exactly. Now for most of the demons affected it just messed with their internal magic in some way and caused minor physical changes, but I'm half human, so it outright suppressed my demon half. Not enough to interfere with my power level, thankfully, but it made it so I was technically only about forty percent demon. And since humans have far shorter lifespans than demons and my human half specifically came from my mother, the result was me going from a teenage boy to a woman in her early twenties."
"Huh. That's actually kinda neat. And in that case dropping your age is definitely the right starting point. Thankfully I have plenty of experience with that thanks to my Monkey form. So, how you want to start is-"
This goes on for the better part of the evening, and by the time the sun goes down Laharl has a form she can feel much more comfortable in.
After putting the finishing touches on the new and improved Girl Laharl, the demonic Avatar looks out one of the windows, "Oh, I didn't realize how late it was. I should probably be getting back to-" she gets up to leave, only to suddenly feel dizzy and lightheaded, "woah, uh..."
Shantae quickly shoots up and helps her stay steady, "Oh my gosh I am so sorry! I forgot how much of a workout someone's first time messing with transformation magic like that is!"
"It's-I'm fine! Just stood up too fast I think." typical Laharl stubbornness. she really is feeling more like herself, "I can still get home just fiIIIINE!"
Aaand once again Shantae saves her from faceplanting when she stumbles and trips over nothing, "Oh no, I am not letting you try to make a portal back to your castle when you can barely walk! I can call Etna and let her know you're crashing here tonight."
"Fiiiine..." she...is she actually pouting? 'Oh dear mother, sleepy Laharl is adorable!'
After getting laid down on the (actually alarmingly comfortable, like where did she find cushions this soft on her peanuts salary?) couch, she once again drops her usual attitude, looking up at Shantae with completely undisguised affection, "Hey, uh, thanks for...everything you did to help me tonight."
"Anytime." as she grabs a blanket for her guest, she adds "And I do mean that. Anytime you need help, with this or anything else, you can come to me, got it."
"Got it."
"And thank you for trusting me enough to tell me about all this." She crouches down so they'll be at eye level, even if Laharl's are already half-closed, "I know how hard it can be to come out to someone."
"Mmm, 'course I trust you. You're family." And with that she's out like a light.
Shantae...actually chokes up a little at that. With her parents out of the picture since before she can remember, and Scuttle Town being...well, Scuttle Town, she can count on her hands the number of people she'd honestly have called family before all this Meme stuff, especially since Seven Sirens and the other four half-genies hadn't existed yet when the pods dropped, and she knows full well that Laharl's own complicated family-related hangups are far worse. So for her to say that so openly and honestly, even while half asleep...
On some sort of impulse, she leans down and brushes Laharl's hair out of her face gently enough not to wake her, "I swear, I'll do my best to live up to that," With that said, she gets back up, opens her command box...and takes a picture of the sleeping Avatar before sending it to Etna.
>Hey, Laharl wore herself out and needed a place to crash, so dw when she's not back til tomorrow.
>HOLY SHIT SHES SO FUCKING CUTE!!!! i gota send this 2 Flonny n the Gs
>thx 4 helpin hr btw, none of us r shapeshifters so we coldnt do jack
>*thumbs up*
'Hell yeah, I got this sister thing on lockdown.'
#smg4#disgaea#shantae#laharl#girl laharl#genderfluid#genderfluid laharl#headcanon#i guess#just for this au's specific version of the character though#etna#flonne#implied rottytops#heavily implied shantae x rottytops#look girl laharl's design is cool but there's a LOT about it that laharl very understandably doesn't like#i tend to see laharl as equivalent to 15 or 16 and canon girl laharl as equivalent to 22 or 23 due to their heights and voices#hence the need for an explanation because that it Quite The Difference#shantae is Very Much a lesbian and not immune to fanservice designs#or to older women#it came up during the transformation manipulation session that laharl's loved ones back home already know about them being genderfluid#which is why shantae knew it would be safe to send etna the pic of Girl Laharl 2.0#this version of shantae swears by her mother because genies in her universe are currently celestial beings on an etherial plane of some sor#and because i thought it'd be a little funny
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It's a bit hard for me to fully understand how bad first grade was for me. Not because the schoolwork was difficult, because I felt too challenged in a academic sense. I struggled, but not because the work was difficult, but because of the racism I dealt with.
My biggest problem that entire year had to of been my teacher. Starting from mispronouncing my name and refusing to say it properly. Accusing me of cheating on my projects because of how well they were done. While I did get help, she assumed my mom had always done all the work for me.
She liked to try and embarrass me, looked for opportunities to call me a trouble maker and would loudly announce my "bad" behavior, despite her simply mixing me up with students with similar names or appearances. Never apologized to me when she was wrong, which was every time.
Called me slow, would make comments about how long it took me to do activities, especially writing.
There were so many things she did that entire school year that added up. But the most disrespectful thing had to of been when I asked her for our Thanksgiving classroom play, if i could be one of the natives rather than the pilgrims. I'm native american, I'm the only native american in this class, I don't want to be a pilgrim. Guess who was a pilgrim?
And she made sure the native men were loud and ruthless and the native women were scared of everything and screamed and shouted in fear so easily. While the pilgrims were calm and collected, from the men to the women and they helped these poor natives.
My mom and me shared similar opinions on the play and she even talked to my teacher about how harmful it was to teach kids our history like that. The she should do better and emphasized the proper way to say my name. Which she pretended she just didn't know, I never corrected her. (My mom knew this was a lie as I was known to be very quick to correct people and sometimes hostile if they didn't quickly amend it. So yeah... Also, she continued to mispronounce my name unless my mom was there.)
I almost forgot, I am a very quiet person, especially then. I only talked if I had to or liked you enough to talk to. She said even though I met the curriculum for the next grade, in fact, she had kept lowering my reading level until she got in trouble, that she wanted to hold me back for a year. She got an earful from my mom for that one, and I didn't get held back.
So that was what it was like in the classroom. Outside of it, I was often physically assaulted by four girls.
There was this one who was in my class and she made it her mission to stand next to me in line so she could force me to talk. I never did, so she would twist my arm, pinch me, punch me, try to bend my hand back, saying I just had to say something and she'd stop. She never got in trouble for it and it's not because she never got caught, many times I caught my teacher's eye while she was physically harming me, she'd smile and look away.
While I was outside of the classroom, outside of line, there was a group of three girls. They come up to me, make comments, grab my stuff, my belongings, corner me. I remember one weekend I got my nails done, they were yellow with glitter. They saw my nails asked if they were real, and proceeded to rip off every single nail. My best friend saw, alerted her mom who did work there. Not much came from that, they continued to harass me, they just made sure my friend wasn't around and her mom.
So yeah, it was really traumatic, dealing with so much every day at school. I remember walking to the bus one day, it was really windy, and I thought about how much I wished it would pick up more and knock me into the wall. Enough to hurt and kill me. I thought about death a lot that year. I didn't realize until I got older how much it truly affected me.
Also, fun fact, I ended up going to school with those girls again, we moved but in fifth grade I went back to that school, that teacher still taught there, and one of those girls was in my class. She never talked to me, she did give me dirty looks for getting questions correct if she didn't.
And later in middle school I ended up having several classes with all of them. I could tell they recognized me, but never said anything about it. No apologies. Nothing.
The one who twisted my arm, I never saw her again at the very least. But yeah, what a fucked up year, huh?
#Sorry just remembered some of these things tonight#I didn't understand at the time that they were being racist#I've always felt different#And never in a good way#And so i thought for a long time after that - that there was something wrong with me#I wondered what i did to deserve that treatment#What was wrong with me and why did i stay silent?#And now I just look back at it and realized I wasn't the problem#And the school was the problem#The people in the office made similar remarks anytime i was in there#They didnt care about it#And so what could i have done?#The one time a problem got reported the students hardly got in trouble#And I was treated as the troublemaker#So yeah there wasn't much i could do back then#Anyway im going to sleep now#tw racsim#tw abuse#tw bullying#tw suicidality#I remember always saying before i recognized how bad that yesr was thst i would never want to repeat the first grade#I hated first grade#And little by little i started to piece together why and even now I'm remembering things#This was also when my bio dad was a drunk and abusive#Such a great and fun time for sure#Damn fuck that year
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2nd Grade? / 12th House Retrospective
Stream of consciousness, not going back to correct typos, blasting Girl with No Face as I type this:
I went through something in the 2nd grade that I think changed the course of my life. I want to type some thoughts out to hopefully bring myself some closure, as I have been experiencing flash backs to this time in my life.
When I was a little boy, I used to feel like a ray of light. The only other way I can describe it is like a warm, radiant, celestial peace that I feel in my chest almost 24/7. I used to especially feel this way after going to church, doing something kind for someone, or saying kind words to someone in need of hearing them.
My 2nd grade teacher was named Mrs. Stater. I vividly remember on the first day of school, she let everyone in the class know that someone in her family (I can't remember who, it might've been her father? She was old AF at the time so its possible) was the founder of Stater Bros. supermarkets. I don't know if thats true, but thats how I remember it. Mrs. Stater explicitly told us that she hates this man (the founder of Stater Bros.) and that we had to swear to her we would never shop in a Stater Bros. again, ever, as long as we were alive. She even told us to tell our families, she did not want a single penny to go to Stater Bros. corp. Oh, and I did; I made sure everyone in my family knew that Stater Bros. was evil and that we must never shop there again. To this day most of my family won't step foot inside of a Stater Bros., which is ironic because I go there all the time now.
Anyway, as a kid, when I used to feel that warmth/light (happiness?), it was almost always after talking to someone: chatting, yapping, laughing, telling stories, sharing words of kindness, singing, anything that involved connecting with someone. As many people as possible. Unfortunately, that made it very difficult to be a quiet child. In class, I would always get in trouble for talking or laughing or distracting people with my presence. Mrs. Stater eventually got so fed up with me that she made me take my desk/chair and turn it around to face the wall at the back of the class. I didn't understand what I did wrong at the time. It is the earliest feeling of humiliation and shame that I can remember, and it marks the first time I lost that sense of "warmth".
The very next day, I came to class with a smile on my face, ready to start a new day. I started moving my desk back to where I normally was, and I was immediately shouted at. I almost jumped out of my skin, Mrs. Stater screamed at me like a banshee. I already had a lot of trauma from my home life, so being yelled at was already very triggering for me. She asked me what I thought I was doing, and I answered honestly that I was moving my desk back. She asked me why I would do that, and I told her that i thought i was only facing the back for yesterday. She laughed at me, and informed me that that was my new home for the rest of the year. I didn't say anything back; I had been effectively exiled from my friends. I used to talk to everyone... everyone in my class was my friend. In the end, I hooked the straps of my backpack onto my chair and opened up my trapperkeeper to start my day.
For the rest of the year, there was an empty spot where my desk used to be, right next to my good friend Angelica. I remember thinking it was strange to miss somebody who was only 20 feet away from you. Sure, we played during recess, but outside of those few minutes given to the students to be kids, I was alone all day. I had to physically turn in my desk to see what was going on in class. My back hurt from having to turn around, and I eventually learned to just straddle the chair and hold my journal stiff enough that I could write.
Recently, I was told that my attitude is annoying. At first, I was kind of thrown back to 2nd grade, I felt like a little kid again. Why do people make me feel bad for talking? For laughing? For being a human being? But in the next moment, I realized that its not because its annoying, its because those people are jealous seeing other people enjoy life. They covet happiness.
I am a ray of sunshine again, and I refuse to let anyone make me feel bad about it.
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I always thought, "What's so cool about shaving your body?" But also, back of the mind, my insecurity of having a body hair and toxic beauty standards aunt were banging my head on the door of self-love. I wanted to try and then have an opinion about shaving. It started with a lot of contemplating and resistance, but I finally took a step yesterday. I asked my friends to guide me through the process. They told me what razor to use to take care of cuts while shaving. From video calling them to buy which type of razor to searching how to shave on YouTube, it was fun and embarrassing at the same time. Finally, this morning, I took the razor and started shaving with utter excitement and an anxious face because razor cuts are kind of painful.
While I was shaving my body, I felt something I don't know how to express, but it was like visiting a storeroom in your house after a couple of decades. You visit that storeroom, and you find your old broken pink cycle, summer mat, video games, old television stickered with a kitty sticker, unfinished jigsaw puzzle, first love letter in your 4th-grade book, father's broken glasses, and used makeup products of mother in a cardboard box and what not, which reminds you of a lot of things you have become and how much you have outgrown the things you were so attached to.
I felt the same when I visited my body today. Some terrible flashbacks and some bunch of stupid and funny memories. I started shaving from my leg. I realized one day my father bought me new Barbie shoes, and the day I wore them for a few hours, it started paining a lot, and I got some good blisters, corns, and calluses. My foot got some permanent scars, but the good thing is I never saw my father that much happy when he bought those shoes after his salary. When I started shaving my calf, I remembered one day I was waiting for my school bus. Beside me, there were a bunch of motorbikes. I was just playing around until my school bus came. While playing, I got a burn from a silencer on my left calf. Oh lord, it was painful. I went to school with that pain but couldn't tell the reason why I was crying in the classroom. I thought people would never understand my hurt. I think today also it's difficult to speak about why I am crying. After that, I saw my knees. There were a bunch of scars on the left and right knees. I remember I didn't play much in my high school days, but whenever I played, I got hurt brutally while playing football, basketball, kabaddi, Kho Kho, and volleyball. But oh god, those days were beautiful. It was easy to heal those hurts than these days in my college where I am not physically hurt but emotionally hurt. Coming to thighs and touching them made me cry. I never thought someone touching me there would make me feel so terrible in my adultelescent days. After that incident, making love with someone feels impossible now, but I want to make love until my body says, "This is what you deserve, this love, the comforting touches to make you realize you deserve to be loved after that incident." Some scars don't have to be visible to be taken care of. They are just left there alone and given some time to heal.
When I started shaving my hands, I realized I had hair on my fingers, which really made me feel about myself after doing a handshake with anyone. At the age of 10, I started feeling touch-starved, and I never did handshakes. I looked at my forearms. I know when I was a kid, I hated razors, blades, injections. They were so scary and painful, but I still don't understand how I got the courage to self-harm myself with a blade? When I saw them, I felt I was so helpless, hopeless, and cruel to myself. I wish I could hug that 16-year-old of me. She didn't realize she was turning into a dreadful monster, which she is not. I know she would think a hundred times to kill a bug. After that, I saw my upper arm. There were some scratches of nails. I know I would never be an ideal daughter to my family, but after I spilled milk on the floor, I never thought that would bring me permanent scars. My mother dragged me, holding my upper arm, through the kitchen to the drawing room, while I got hurt with her long nails. After that, I hesitate to drink milk and have nails. I think because they will hurt someone. Later, I saw my shoulders. I remember I have huge stretch marks, and I shared with him one day. He saw my eyes were teary that they would create a lake of hatred from a decade. He didn't get scared with the huge lake of hatred but yet made peace with it and sat beside me. He said, "I like your stretch marks because I also have them. We have spring rolls in our homebody which people don't have." He made me giggle a bit, but after that, I just couldn't stop thinking about kissing him. He made me believe those lyrics from the golden hour, "She's got glitter for skin, my radiant beam in the night. I don't need no light to see you shine."
Finally, after shaving my legs and arms, there were some tears falling and a wide smile on my face. I never thought visiting my body like this would make me feel so closer and happy in myself. It's true, the body keeps the scores. After taking a good shower and moisturizing my skin, I could see the scars and marks, but I gave myself a warm hug. My skin, thighs, and legs seemed so soft after moisturizing. I was touching them after a decade so softly and gently, just like how I carry a baby in my arms. I finally understood one of my therapy sessions with my therapist, that loving someone or loving yourself is a choice. You have to either hate or love yourself at the end of the day. And after years of self-harm, I chose to love myself and my body.
#my story of razor and skin#shaving#skin#beauty#beauty standards#desi academia#desiblr#desi#desi shit posting#dear diary#poems#short essay#poetries#individuality#spilled poetry#stoicism
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4 5 19 23
4. What's a word that makes you go absolutely feral?
I know there are words that make me go feral but I am drawing a blank rn. I'd know one if I saw one.
5. Do you have any writing superstitions? What are they and why are they 100% true?
If I don't write the entire fic before I post the first chapter, it will not be finished. You know the evidence already.
19. Tell me a story about your writing journey. When did you start? Why did you start? Were there bumps along the way? Where are you now and where are you going?
I've always been writing. I liked playing make-believe as a kid, and probably held onto those stories a lot longer than my peers. I thought the worlds in stories held so much wonder and possibility and more interest than the world I lived in. So when my peers became too old to play pretend with me, I turned to writing to continue to create those stories and exist within them.
I remember two books that got me interested in writing myself. One of them was called Sparrow Road, which was about a girl who spent the summer at an artist's retreat and met all these different artists who were working with different mediums to tell their stories. It was a place I wanted to go to. I can't remember the name of the other book, but it was about two girls who met in a treehouse by a river near their houses. They gave each other nicknames and wrote a book together and won a competition and got to travel to a University to take a summer writing workshop together. The two of these books left a big impact on me, not only by being good stories, but by showing me that people like me could write.
So I started writing. I wrote fanfiction before I even knew the name of it, mostly small scenes with a cooler version of me inserted into some cinematic universe with all my favorite characters from all my favorite media going on adventures together. I've always liked writing for large casts.
But I also wrote my own fiction. My seventh grade homeroom teacher was also an English teacher at the high school, and he was very kind to proofread and provide feedback on my scifi book I was writing. Looking back on it is embarrassing, but his encouragement meant I didn't stop writing.
Once I found out about fanfiction I pivoted more towards that. And that's been my main form of creative writing since early high school. Getting feedback and building a community around writing has been very encouraging for me, and I have definitely improved since I first stepped into the fanfic scene. But I'm also too scared to try and jump back to original works. Fanfic is hard because I eventually run out of what to say, but original work is hard because I never know what to say to start with. Right now, TML is the balance between for me, because it gives me more freedom on what to say and do without completely leaving the framework of another work. But that's got it's own difficulties, mainly the loss of a wide feedback group. Which would be completely gone if I jumped to regular original work. Ideally I'd like to publish something someday, but it's too far off for me to see how I'd get there.
23. Describe the physical environment in which you write. Be as detailed as possible. Tell me what's around you as you work. Paint me a picture.
couch
#rat lab reports#I was going to give a real answer to 23 but I think this is funnier#feel free to send another ask if you really want to know the actual answer
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I always thought, "What's so cool about shaving your body?" But also, back of the mind, my insecurity of having a body hair and toxic beauty standards aunt were banging my head on the door of self-love. I wanted to try and then have an opinion about shaving. It started with a lot of contemplating and resistance, but I finally took a step yesterday. I asked my friends to guide me through the process. They told me what razor to use to take care of cuts while shaving. From video calling them to buy which type of razor to searching how to shave on YouTube, it was fun and embarrassing at the same time. Finally, this morning, I took the razor and started shaving with utter excitement and an anxious face because razor cuts are kind of painful.
While I was shaving my body, I felt something I don't know how to express, but it was like visiting a storeroom in your house after a couple of decades. You visit that storeroom, and you find your old broken pink cycle, summer mat, video games, old television stickered with a kitty sticker, unfinished jigsaw puzzle, first love letter in your 4th-grade book, father's broken glasses, and used makeup products of mother in a cardboard box and what not, which reminds you of a lot of things you have become and how much you have outgrown the things you were so attached to.
I felt the same when I visited my body today. Some terrible flashbacks and some bunch of stupid and funny memories. I started shaving from my leg. I realized one day my father bought me new Barbie shoes, and the day I wore them for a few hours, it started paining a lot, and I got some good blisters, corns, and calluses. My foot got some permanent scars, but the good thing is I never saw my father that much happy when he bought those shoes after his salary. When I started shaving my calf, I remembered one day I was waiting for my school bus. Beside me, there were a bunch of motorbikes. I was just playing around until my school bus came. While playing, I got a burn from a silencer on my left calf. Oh lord, it was painful. I went to school with that pain but couldn't tell the reason why I was crying in the classroom. I thought people would never understand my hurt. I think today also it's difficult to speak about why I am crying. After that, I saw my knees. There were a bunch of scars on the left and right knees. I remember I didn't play much in my high school days, but whenever I played, I got hurt brutally while playing football, basketball, kabaddi, Kho Kho, and volleyball. But oh god, those days were beautiful. It was easy to heal those hurts than these days in my college where I am not physically hurt but emotionally hurt. Coming to thighs and touching them made me cry. I never thought someone touching me there would make me feel so terrible in my adultelescent days. After that incident, making love with someone feels impossible now, but I want to make love until my body says, "This is what you deserve, this love, the comforting touches to make you realize you deserve to be loved after that incident." Some scars don't have to be visible to be taken care of. They are just left there alone and given some time to heal.
When I started shaving my hands, I realized I had hair on my fingers, which really made me feel about myself after doing a handshake with anyone. At the age of 10, I started feeling touch-starved, and I never did handshakes. I looked at my forearms. I know when I was a kid, I hated razors, blades, injections. They were so scary and painful, but I still don't understand how I got the courage to self-harm myself with a blade? When I saw them, I felt I was so helpless, hopeless, and cruel to myself. I wish I could hug that 16-year-old of me. She didn't realize she was turning into a dreadful monster, which she is not. I know she would think a hundred times to kill a bug. After that, I saw my upper arm. There were some scratches of nails. I know I would never be an ideal daughter to my family, but after I spilled milk on the floor, I never thought that would bring me permanent scars. My mother dragged me, holding my upper arm, through the kitchen to the drawing room, while I got hurt with her long nails. After that, I hesitate to drink milk and have nails. I think because they will hurt someone. Later, I saw my shoulders. I remember I have huge stretch marks, and I shared with him one day. He saw my eyes were teary that they would create a lake of hatred from a decade. He didn't get scared with the huge lake of hatred but yet made peace with it and sat beside me. He said, "I like your stretch marks because I also have them. We have spring rolls in our homebody which people don't have." He made me giggle a bit, but after that, I just couldn't stop thinking about kissing him. He made me believe those lyrics from the golden hour, "She's got glitter for skin, my radiant beam in the night. I don't need no light to see you shine."
Finally, after shaving my legs and arms, there were some tears falling and a wide smile on my face. I never thought visiting my body like this would make me feel so closer and happy in myself. It's true, the body keeps the scores. After taking a good shower and moisturizing my skin, I could see the scars and marks, but I gave myself a warm hug. My skin, thighs, and legs seemed so soft after moisturizing. I was touching them after a decade so softly and gently, just like how I carry a baby in my arms. I finally understood one of my therapy sessions with my therapist, that loving someone or loving yourself is a choice. You have to either hate or love yourself at the end of the day. And after years of self-harm, I chose to love myself and my body.
#this is what i wrote after shaving#desiblr#poetry#aesthetic#prose poetry#mental health#parenting#desi things#desiblogger#positivity#quotes
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15 Quastions! c:
Tagged by @sharkboypussy for ask game :o And I tag @dragonboypaws @red-jaw329 @tolbachik @kingfinfat @schr0dingus @the-timeline-owner to answer if they'd like, as well as any other followers or mutuals :o
(Answers and Blank question template under read more!)
1) Are you named after anyone? When I went by Zia, I actually had named myself after Zia from Bastion, but misremembered the pronunciation (mine - Zei uh like sigh/ Bastion - Zee uh like bee) But now I just go by Sydney, just pulled from my OC's name sdlkjf
2) When was the last time you cried? Basically anytime I listen to game OSTs 😭 Whether it's really strong orchestrated ones like Monster Hunter, or emotionally charged ones like Undertale (OG + Yellow), and any other Strong music to me sdfkjs (For specific examples, Roar of the Jungle Dragon, UTY Remedy+Retribution, Battle Against a True Hero, ORDER, Bazelgeuse theme(s), Ceadeus & Alatreon MH3U)
3) Do you have kids? Nope, maybe someday, but probably not
4) What sports have you played? I haven't played proper sports in probably a decade or two, outside of gym class genuinely don't think I've played sports since 4th grade But of just physical games, maybe ultimate frisbee back at the end of high school
5) Do you use sarcasm? I like to, but also try not to, since my sarcasm gets pretty negative, even for sarcasm's sake >_>
6) First thing you notice about someone? Not sure.... maybe voice, or
7) Eye color? Hazel! Genuinely could not remember so had to look at my license >_>
8) Scary movies or happy endings? Happy endings, there's already enough scary things/bad endings out there
9) Any talents? I'm above average at video games c: And also have an avg. typing speed of 80-100wpm (Typeracer says 120WPM but I feel that's different from casual typing speed I think sdlfkj)
10) Where were you born? Da "Gateway to the West" City™
11) Hobbies? Video games and singing........ and, that's about it
12) Any pets? A pit-lab mix iirc and two cats!!
13) Height? 5'6"-ish, whatever Average height is basically sldkfjsd
14) Favorite school subject? Hmmmmmm it changed a lot for me, but over the years it was Reading, History, and Math I really loved writing, and was always complimented on my essay and other writing skills way back when sdlkfjsd History was a really fun subject, and one of my favorite teachers I ever had did history (and then Science the next two years I ended up having her for) And like the logic and puzzle-solving of math, but I also had the WORST teacher for most of my advanced math-learning years 😩
15) Dream job? Voice acting I think.......... It was a huge childhood dream of mine to get into voice acting, but didn't have many connections or knowledge on how to go about it 😔
(And here's the questions without my answers below them for ones who need copy-paste c:) 1) Are you named after anyone?
2) When was the last time you cried?
3) Do you have kids?
4) What sports have you played?
5) Do you use sarcasm?
6) First thing you notice about someone?
7) Eye color?
8) Scary movies or happy endings?
9) Any talents?
10) Where were you born?
11) Hobbies?
12) Any pets?
13) Height?
14) Favorite school subject?
15) Dream job?
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15 Questions For The Writer
1. Are you named after anyone? Off of tumblr, my family named me after a character from the soap opera, 'D.ays of our Lives'.
2. When was the last time you cried? Mmmm. Christmas eve? Not going to divulge in that though haha. Just out of frustration.
3. Do you have kids? No.
4. Do you use sarcasm a lot? Oh yes, though I try not to use it against people who I don't know or who aren't keen with it. But if I hear someone use sarcasm, I'll do it right back.
5. What’s the first thing you notice about people? Mainly what clothes they are wearing. Or if they have a cute bag. Or listening to them react to their environment, whether it's positive or negative.
I can't look into faces of strangers I don't know. I know in interviews with a stranger for a job, it's a lot different, but I still have to force myself to give eye contact. Otherwise, it makes me physically uncomfortable if I don't know a person. So my eyes are usually drawn by colors of apparel first, or the sounds going on around me.
6. What’s your eye colour? Hazel Green
7. Scary movies or happy endings? Happy endings rn. I cannot physically stomach scary movies (or even shows with 'everyday' scary themes currently, but I know I will get back to those eventually).
But I was ruined with scary movies in 4th /5th grade when one of my old friends forced me to watch em'. I never recovered and C.huckie still is the stuff of nightmares to me, I cannot look at a baby doll the same way again 😂
8. Any special talents? ...falling up the steps rather than falling down. I swear, the amount of times I do it. Even my dog does it from time to time ( though she is very fine, she just slips on one step up but never falls completely.)
9. Where were you born? USA, Georgia.
11. Have you any pets? I am on my second pupper! First one passed of old age after high school, and I got the second a year and a half later and she is still going strong 😊
12. What sport do you play/have played? Oh my god. I am a limp noodle when it comes to sports and I don't play anything currently. I would be 'THAT kid who would be the last one to be chosen' type of bad LMAO
When I was little, my parents tried to force me to do sports, which is probably why I hated them for so long (though I have grown to appreciate them a decade ago and will not say no to trying out new things).
I know I did gymnastics in like...early elementary school years...I have a few plastic participation trophies from them l m a o. But I honestly cannot remember anything about it but the big foam cube pool. Ballet, but that did not last long at all despite also having two or three participation trophies. Little me HATED it. I felt so embarrassed wearing those frilly tutus during recitals... I was not that kind of little girl. It even came up during Christmas recently, and my grandpa admitted to me that I NEVER looked like I was having fun during those show recitals, I always had this look of ' 'I have no clue what I am doing' and 'why am I here' while my mom and grandma always raved about how cute I look in that heavy makeup lmao. Because apparently I never looked out to the crowd, I always watched what the other kids were doing and tried to keep up. 😂 I think I must've been like. 5 at the time.
I think?? I did one lesson with horse riding, but even though I enjoyed it, I was never taken back to it. But I was so little and I realize now that costs are expensive l m a o.
I think I went to tennis practice two times in elementary and was done. They tried to put me in cheerleading classes, which was laughable, I did one class and said no. Karate...was more interesting in middle school since it was the first time I chose it, but I was frustrated that I could never remember what to do during performances and my parents were never supportive anyway since they wanted me to be in the "girly girl" sports.
All in all, all the personal sports memories I have are rather negative, which was unfortunate.
13. How tall are you? 5 foot 3 inches. s m o l l.
14. Favourite subject in school? Other than art, I loved when the football coaches in high school taught history because they made it fun.
15. Dream job? I would absolutely love to do something with my art. Currently, taking baby steps to make them feel achievable. Current SMALL dream is to open up an etsy to run on side while working a job. I got a heat press to make shirts, and I got a cricut to make all sorts of others things.
tagging: YOU tagged by: @yukikorogashi (thank you friendo!)
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15 questions!
supposed to be 15 mutuals too but i'm still too shy to tag people on this blog BUT if you don't mind getting tagged in posts like this then feel free to like this post & i'll tag you in the future. teehee
i was tagged by @stripesysheaven 💖💖 thank you
1. are you named after anyone?
my deadname is probably inspired by some french royalty. i did nickname myself after a videogame protagonist though, even though i don't use that nickname much any more
wait actually i'm vaguely remembering smth abt my mom supposedly naming myself after a local actress. that works too if that's true
2. when was the last time you cried?
very recently because i was very sad. but also it's easy for me to cry bc of stuff i watch. i teared up during three different moments while watching the new puss in boots movie
3. do you have kids?
no. probably never. it's a very big responsibility
4. do you use sarcasm a lot?
not a lot, just sometimes. usually just to be funny or when i'm ranting to someone abt an anecdote in private. i like making it apparent when i do though. "i DONT use sarcasm at all NOT using it right now. what makes you say that"
5. what sports do you play/have you played?
recently competed in badminton doubles!! with strangers i met like minutes before the matches started haha. we were short on people. i'm not Very Good at any particular sport but i'll play most things for fun. i miss doing frisbee class
6. what's the first thing you notice about other people?
i'm always So Scareds of people so it's hard to answer this question... probably the way they speak? i don't have to be looking at people to notice that
7. what's your eye colour?
almost black, deep brown thangs
8. scary movies or happy endings?
schmaltz forever
9. any special talents?
i can follow sheet music on the spot (just give me the pitch and i'm good) and i'm good at bullshitting melodies i've never sang before
10. where were you born?
born and raised and still here in the philippines
11. what are your hobbies?
watching shows and movies and getting incredibly emotionally attached to fictional characters and thinking about them too hard is my #1 hobby. aside from that i like listening to video essays/podcasts, drawing, writing... i also like walking. once i learn how to ride a bike i'd like to do that regularly too
i need more physical crafty hobbies, i just don't have the space/space management skills to do them rn... i used to do a lot of paper crafting as a kid
12. do you have any pets?
toothless is a... tuxedo cat? he's technically my grandpa's but i consider him my little guy too
they're my cousins' but i also live with two dogs :) toffee (middle) who is a very bitey puppy. he's aspin but he probably has some fancy breed in his blood or smn bc his fur is very soft. and betsy (right, jailed for crimes. she doesn't mind) is a shih tzu and they've had her for a few years now C:
13. how tall are you?
i hate checking my height cz i might shrink again. probably around 5'6"
14. favorite subject in school?
i loved math and science in grade school. in high school i enjoyed lit a lot more. pending answer for college lol
15. dream job?
my cousin once brought up the idea of us owning a bar/cafe/resto thing together. it would be nice!
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Sorry about that Love, I wasn’t sure how to do it. The prompt is Al Pratt and Grant Emerson with the word homework. Have fun with it!! (Sorry again)
Don't worry! Easy mistake to make!
Even with the excitement of finding Grant some things couldn't be put off for long. One of those things was the homework Al had to grade.
On the bright side he had discovered something very interesting.
Grant would listen in complete attention to whatever Al said as long as Al was talking to him.
“They didn't show their work.” Al frowned towards Grant where he was seated on the floor with a few soft blocks. He exaggerated his expression and Grant smiled at him widely. “This isn't the first time they forgot.”
Al heaved a large fake sigh. He was honestly kind of annoyed that he had to keep reminding them. But complaining about it to Grant, who didn't know what numbers were not to mention physics, made him feel much better.
“I am going to have to give them half credit on the problems.” Grant seemed interested in Al's voice. Making a noise when he stopped talking. “Don't worry. I will let them know what they did wrong. There is always next time.”
Al smiled at Grant. “That is something you should remember. Mistakes aren't forever. You can always try your best not to repeat one. You can always change.”
Grant tilted his head at his dad and then held one of the blocks out to him. Al reached down to take it and placed it on top of another block.
“You won't have to worry about that though, will you? Because I am going to teach you how to show your work.”
There was a pause as Al finished looking over the rest of the paper. Something stood out.
“Do you think I should subtract points for misspelling their own name?”
Grant babbled at him.
Al nodded in agreement. “You're right. That is embarrassing enough by itself. No further punishment. It would be cruel.”
Al shook his head in mock sadness. No harm in playing things up with such an appreciative audience.
Though he had to wonder what was being taught at some schools.
“Grant?” Al waited for Grant to focus on him. “What do you think of being home schooled? I could teach you a lot more than some teachers.”
Grant babbled at him some more.
“Yeah. You have a good point. We should at least try regular school first.” The sigh Al made was real this time. It would be nice to just always keep Grant either by him or with someone he knew and trusted.
But that wouldn't be fair to either of them.
Grant would need, as much as Al hated to admit it, to be free to explore beyond Al's life.
It was hard to accept that.
Thankfully Grant was a few years away from preschool still. So he had time to adjust to the idea.
Al pulled out the next paper from the stack. He closed his eyes and pinched his nose.
Worse than turning in homework with a misspelled name. This was turned in with no name at all.
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