#i don't normally write reviews bc i'm. tired

[draconicace]

watching a playthrough of indika and though i haven't finished it yet, i think pathologic and disco elysium fans would really like it.

you play as a hallucinating nun named indika with a voice in her head and everyone at the monastery hates her, to the point of sending her away on a dangerous letter delivery. early on, she meets ilya, a guy who really wants to get his arm fixed via religious miracle.

flashbacks are done in retro-style video game graphics, and the rest of the game is done in a 3d-realism style. sometimes things in the background are very big and sometimes indika gets to operate a crane. it's set in 19th century russia. there's a giant dog that chases you. important questions are asked, like: 'do the ends justify the motivations? who gets to have free will? can you love without a body? can you measure sin?' and many more quandaries to think about. the setting and framing of certain shots is impeccable.

i don't want to say any more to avoid spoilers, especially about the characters, who are really interesting. be aware of content warnings, but the game (as far as i've seen) isn't voyeuristic or sensationalist about anything. give it a try perhaps

[luminous-studiess]

Ummm so I'm new to tumblr so don't judge if I did something wrong.Ummm how can I be like you? Like you know? Productive and smart.I always push myself but ended up being distracted by things (I have adhd and depression).I can't even remember anything after.I suffer,and continue suffering, from my mental illnesses.I just can't keep myself on track.My family makes fun of me for trying.I'm actually trying to find a part time job here but nothing hires minors.Idk please help meee.

hi, friend! answer under the cut because this will be long. 

please know you’re doing nothing wrong, and that the fact you keep trying to become better and to push yourself to always get things done despite difficult circumstances already shows that you ARE already productive and smart. 

second, it also helped me when i was struggling very heavily last year to learn  two things: 1) there will always be particularly bad days when you live with mental illness, but all the little efforts you take, it slowly does get less difficult. getting better does not mean completely getting rid of all the symptoms you experience, but mostly just learning the best ways and small, gentle things you can do for yourself to manage your condition. this really requires a gentle but firm balance between pushing yourself to do the things you absolutely need to do, but also knowing when what level of work/school/self-care or hobbies is the limit, so that you don’t get too overwhelmed.  this means most of the time, you don’t have to worry about being productive for its own sake. it helps me when i feel like i’m drowning to know how little i can do/the most non-negotiable bare minimum, that still helps me not to fall behind.

^ this is a small, cheap pad of sticky notes i carry with me throughout my entire day. it’s only big enough so that i can only write a few school tasks/personal things i need to do/chores, which helps me evaluate what exactly i can only get done, especially on days where i don’t feel well. checking off absolutely everything on my tiny list makes me feel like i’ve accomplished a lot, because i i have-- they aren’t necessarily a lot of tasks, but they’re the ones that i know really do need to get done. it also helps me focus when i have a lot of nervous energy, and have a panicked sense of “so many things need to get done!!!?” because i can give myself a bit of time to sit down, maybe turn on an episode of a show i like or make some coffee, and write down my tasks. it really helps me with the faint, tiny guilt and dread i used to feel day by day that i was being unproductive or lazy, because now i know i’ve fulfilled all my obligations to myself (everything from doing laundry, to making dinner) and to other people (schoolwork and other tasks). it’s okay to move at the pace that’s only possible for you right now. it’s better to feel comfortable with the smallest things you can do, and build on that as the days come. 2) getting distracted is normal, given Everything Happening Right Now, plus with a mental health condition that makes it hard to focus. it can also be hard to remember things when i study, because of my own health conditions, but i’ve found that the following things have helped: regarding distraction - use a small system that keeps you from accessing any distractions when you need to get something done. i try to leave my non-essential device in another room, and set up a timer-based blocker, to limit the websites i access. - i try to acknowledge the distractions as they come, and try to figure out why: am i hungry? am i tired? have i gotten enough sleep? do i need a break? if it isn’t anything serious, i just acknowledge that i’ve gone briefly off-track-- without guilt, without judgment. then i try to turn my mind back to the task at hand. - a good ambient playlist can make me feel more focused during hard tasks in the sense that i have some form of stimulation to keep the “itchiness” at bay. video game soundtracks and film soundtracks are also wonderful for long, tricky tasks.  - sometimes i just have to start to feel motivated-- the focus actually comes in in the middle of the task. the fact of starting something may actually make you feel motivated.

- procrastinate productively: sometimes when i really don’t want to study i turn on a movie or a show and use the time to clean my room or fold laundry. my life still feels put-together, and i enjoyed myself! win-win.

- and sometimes i realize that focus may be impossible at the moment: take a break, go for a run, do something you like, take a nap.  regarding learning and remembering things i used to have the worst time recalling things for school, until i prioritized two things: SLEEP, and not cramming. i used to get extremely poor grades in my first year of law school because i would put off studying at the last and latest moment-- a few days before exams, pulling all-nighters right up until the hour the exam started. i would also just use my free time to scroll on social media, instead of taking a nap or going to bed early. this was absolutely wrong. during the exam, i couldn’t recall anything because i was too tired, too frazzled, probably didn’t have breakfast, and because i had started and finished half a semester of reading in one night. my grades have gotten much better lately-- i’d like to think it’s because i��ve centered it around two things: (a) getting enough sleep every single night (helpful ESPECIALLY if you have health problems-- mental or physical), and (b) making exam day the least stressful it can be. how do i do this? - this means not only learning things for the exam, but also for classes on a daily period. you don’t have to study particularly hard, but you just have to study enough that you can understand what the professor is saying in class. set definite study hours every day, stop at a very specific and reasonable hour, and go to bed. try to get at least 6 hours of sleep. sleep helps me absorb everything better (idk science but this is from experience and also some very smart people i know ALSO prioritize getting sleep). wake up at a reasonable hour.  - how to study: read the syllabus, and try to get a decent overview of all the topics you need to cover before you start testing/making flashcards/doing active recall (which is IMPORTANT bc this helps you actually train your brain to retrieve information). imho as someone low-energy i find that rewriting notes/making reviewers/making flashcards makes me very tired and leaves very little time for actual studying, so it just helps to test myself by looking at the syllabus and trying to explain the concept to myself, then peeking at the textbook or materials to see what i’m missing. mind-maps are also energy-efficient ways of figuring out how concepts fit together. - how to study for exams: the very latest you should start is a week ahead. two weeks ahead is ideal. map out how much information you need to re-learn from the syllabus. move slowly with the aim of finishing the coverage by the first week. the second is for reviewing and RESTING. - THE NIGHT BEFORE THE EXAM: do a final, gentle survey over the topics you may not understand. stop at 10 pm. go to sleep.  - EXAM DAY: you’ve done the work. take the time to eat breakfast, test yourself SLOWLY AND GENTLY (avoid reading huge chunks of textbook at this point-- youll only confuse yourself), and set up your workspace to take the exam. crush said exam. as a final note: it can be hard to get things done when the people closest to you aren’t supportive. try to reach out on studyblr and find discord study with me servers, or study communities on reddit (they’re actually really nice), or with students in your class. if you need to talk, just dm me. you can do this friend, okay? take care always. gentler days will come. 

[taylortruther]

I’m surprised y’all think her press is less stringently controlled now bc judging by the reviews and articles she gets I’d say the opposite lol. I just think they’re more successful now

anon, i know you didn't expect me to write a thesis about this... but i did, enjoy!

i don't know if i'd define it as more stringent. she only does interviews with outlets or people she trusts, as an anon pointed out, which is the definition of pretty stringent control over her press. but she also lives very privately, and her press is mostly about her creative process, so like... who cares if she picks and chooses? that's a completely normal and reasonable choice for a celebrity. one that i do believe she deserves and is entitled to make.

and then there's also the reality that there's constant tension between media and the entertainment industry. it's a symbiotic relationship because media needs some celebrity cooperation to have content and celebrities benefit from coverage; but media is also invasive and will report on things people want to read about, which usually means scandals or things that don't benefit a celeb's image, especially one as controlled and "good" as taylor's used to be.

taylor's team was SO controlling of her image that people saw through it. they also ate it up, until she got famous enough that it became an obvious veneer - let's not discuss the sexism and parasocialism of all that, just know i'm aware of it. and taylor KNEW people wanted to see her downfall. she could sense it, because it happens to all celebs, especially women... and because she'd already felt she was at an unfair advantage with the media (feeling she had to play the game, while feeling picked apart). remember during the 1989 tour when she thanked fans for fighting for her when she felt her hands were tied and she couldn't defend herself? remember her saying in her vogue interview that she knew she was lightning rod for sexism because of her dating life? and remember when buzzfeed, for example, released their article about how taylor swift played the victim... and then tree sent a billion corrections? remember how weird it was that she was being positioned as aryan barbie by people and her team's lack of response was the weirdest response? that was A LOT of control being exerted constantly over her image in kind of blatant, mistaken ways.

so, the media definitely jumped on her with glee when 2016 happened. let's agree that much of the piling on - much of it, not all of it - was incredibly unfair and simply psychologically damaging, because the media and detractors didn't see taylor as a person and didn't bother sharing or researching context.

ALL THAT SAID... i think the media knows that heaping praise on taylor is what people want to read about her right now. taylor going private, releasing miss americana, the additional kimye snapgate details, masters situation, and her overall redemption arc has changed the public's perception of her. like. there's no interest in stories about how she played the victim, how she weaponizes her femininity, how she's a slut for dating around, etc. etc. she has completely taken the air out of those stories' tires by simply going private and shifting her image from pre-reputation taylor to that of a serious songwriter and businesswoman.

and so i don't think her team is telling people "remove that story" or sending in vast, personal corrections or booting journalists out of parties. i believe they used to do that. but i don't think they're being that "petty" anymore.