#i don't like the claws i'll change it on the future keep that on mind too

[lovebvni]

intuitive messages pac !!

THIS IS FROM 2023!! BE FOREWARNED

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│ᵒᵖᵉⁿⁱⁿᵍ ᵐᵉˢˢᵃᵍᵉ...

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[ 🖊 ] created ⋮ 7.31.23

[  ] published ⋮  7.31.23

˚₊·͟͟͟͟͟͟͞͞͞͞͞͞➳❥ ꒰ ⌨ ✰ Arsyn   ⋆  ⁱˢ ᵗʸᵖⁱⁿᵍ··· ꒱ | ೃ࿔₊•

┊       ⋆     welcome to my blog !

┊     °

hello earthlings, its been a while since i've done a pac, mainly because of MANY personal issues - but thats not important. i thought for a while and went back to my old pac's and i found an older one i made and i remembered, my intuition is just as powerful as ever - so why do i need tarot cards now?

today i'm just going to have 10 messages/sentences the universe wants you to hear. they can be specific or general.  remember, take everything can be taken with a grain of salt, and your future can be changed. you are in control.

now please, find your inner peace, connect to your soul.

understand these messages were meant to find you, and see what is left for you.

inhale, exhale, and pick a pile

Pile 1 - Watching

confirmation :

procrastinating, pushing things off, turning the other cheek, tumblr, the colour purple (show or the actual colour), spacing out, spirits, double meaning, two faced, gemini, hidden meanings/words, red eyes (tired, puffy), burnt out, music, 'good night, sleep tight, don't let the demons fight.', the letter s, sharks, 'the grass is greener'.

side note : the month of august (summer in general) be significant for your shifting/spiritual journey.

Your messages

1. Why would you wait when you could just grab at it? It's right there. Don't let it rot.

2. "Hello? Are you there, listening? Listen to me. I'm here to help. I promise." (this could be an inner voice or a spirit guide)

3. Be your own boss. Keep going.

4. Pass on to the next step (Death to life)

5. You know what's there, talk to it. "I wont hurt you."

6. Listen, don't speak.

7. Let it go. Be like Elsa, don't let it bother you anymore.

8. Mind, Body and Soul. You're in harmony. Use it to your advantage.

9. Advise and criticize. And use the same techniques on yourself.

10. Peace and love. You deserve it. You know you do. And you will find it, soon.

Pile 2 - Renew

conformation :

saiki k, giving up, letting go, leaving things behind, mental overload, 'Jesus fucking Christ', jealous, letting go of that person, shadow work, yellow, outlook, aries, the moon, big lips, 333, the number 3.

Your messages

1. Bite down. Let it flow into your veins, your soul, your spirit. Its part of you now.

2. Is it a real worry, or just something from your past you don't want to let go of?

3. Jail. Time to rest. Now.

4. Eat and care for your physical body. You can't idolize shifting. You're not getting anywhere doing that.

5. Look in the mirror - no. Not at the past. At who you are now. Who you've become.

6. You have the balls. Go fucking do it.

7. Don't accept the truth from other people, find and make your own. That's what they see, not what you know.

8. Her claws. Her teeth. She's manipulating you. Let her go. Rip away from her. She's wasting your time, energy and draining your soul.

9. "I  DO love you. That doesn't mean I'll let you hurt yourself."

10. I am watching. Always. In your good times and bad. I'm here for you. Just ask for help.

Pile 3 - Love

confirmation :

wrist and elbow, jumpscares/ being scared, saturn, planets, fnaf, cycles, broken cycles, love watch, soulmate reuniting, mha (lmao bro idek at this point), drawing, heartache, feeling lonely, barbie, hip dips, trios.

1. Wake up from that dream and make it a reality, you know what you have to do, so go do it.

2. "Beg for my mercy." - This had a VERY sexual undertone... Obviously from a dominant partner or something

3. 'Hello again, my friend! What do you have to tell me now?"

4. You know that thing you asked for? Yeah. It's coming. Keep your eyes pealed (for some I heard it's even coming tomorrow!)

5. Sit in silence, you know what it is. You hear the voices.

6. Pack your bags and go.

7. Grab on, I'll lead you to where you need to be.

8. Don't chase what you're attracting, that will only lead to disaster. (A manifestation you wanted is coming, this is basically saying don't overwork and beat yourself up over it. It's coming and nothing will stop it.)

9. Nature is your friend. Go out and ground yourself. Lay in the grass, smell the rain.

10. If you want to learn, you need the knowledge. Search for what you want to find. You can see it. Ask around. You'll find it. Look, look, look, search, look look, search, find.

I hope this pac resonated for everyone! remember, this will find you when you need it, take what relates, leave what doesnt. remember you are in charge of your future.

i love you. new things are coming.

dont give up.

1111

[dee-writes-anime]

Lalalalalalaala I'm back, I don't know if I already have another one pending in your requests but eh

yesterday I finished SS2 and it ruined me completely, I'll never be the same i think, now im reading the manga and honestly i saw a few spoilers and im terrified for megumi man, i don't want him to die!!😭🫠

Sigh, anyways, how about like megumi x reader, but it's like after everything settles and the world goes back to normal,and reader is a feeling a bit better (assuming they fought too) and when they wake up and see megumi in Jujutsu high,they just start sobbing and hugging him telling him how precious he is and how scared they were for him,

This is so cringe man I'm cringe but I'm free!! I need megumi to know he's loved he deserves absolutely everything

You're Everything to Me with Megumi Fushiguro

FEATURING Megumi Fushiguro x Reader

SUMMARY In the aftermath of devastation, he is your light

CONTENT WARNINGS angst, dark subjects like suicidal thoughts (please know your boundaries, your mental health is more important), fluff, two cuties in love, only edited ever so slightly T-T

AUTHORS NOTE You go anon! Live in your cringe! Own the cringe! And keep giving me more content ideas! Hope you enjoy <333

The silence was a suffocating thing.

As you stirred, the weight of the world seemed to press down harder, the thin mattress beneath you offering no relief from the crushing heaviness in your chest. For a moment, you wondered if you had even woken up at all—if this was some dream, another layer of the nightmare you’d been living for what felt like years. Your body ached in ways that had nothing to do with the physical, and when your eyes blinked open, the dim, sterile light of the room greeted you like a cold slap.

It was over.

That thought should have brought you comfort, but instead, it twisted like a knife in your gut.

The world had been saved—or at least, what was left of it. The battles had been fought, the enemies had fallen, and you had survived. You were here, alive. But the silence felt wrong, unnatural, as if the air itself was too still, too empty. There was no joy in this victory. There was no peace. Only the lingering sense of loss, of something irreplaceable that had been shattered.

You forced yourself to sit up, but every movement felt sluggish, like wading through thick mud. The room spun briefly, and for a moment, you wished you hadn’t woken at all. It was easier to stay in the dark, easier to float in the void where you didn’t have to think, didn’t have to remember.

But now, in the unforgiving light of the aftermath, the memories came flooding back, sharp and relentless.

How many lives had been lost for this so-called peace? How many faces—friends, comrades, strangers—had fallen, their blood staining the ground? And for what? What had really changed? The world might have been saved, but it was broken, fractured beyond recognition. There was no returning to what once was. The faces you had fought alongside, the ones who had smiled and laughed, were now ghosts that haunted the corners of your mind.

The weight of that realization settled over you, heavy and suffocating, pulling you down into a sea of doubt. Was any of it worth it? All the fighting, all the sacrifice—what had you really gained?

The faces of the fallen swam before your eyes, one after another. Some you had known intimately, others were mere fleeting acquaintances, but each one carried the same hollow finality. You had fought so hard, given so much, and yet, as you sat there in the cold stillness, it felt like none of it mattered. The world you had bled for had become a graveyard of lost dreams, and the future felt as distant as the stars.

The despair clawed at your throat, threatening to choke you.

Why had you fought so hard? Why had you pushed yourself beyond the breaking point? The names of the dead weighed heavily on your heart, and with each one, you wondered if there had been something more you could have done, some way to save them. But deep down, you knew the answer. You knew you had given everything, and still, it wasn’t enough. It was never enough.

Your mind spiraled, the emptiness inside you expanding, swallowing up every thought, every hope. Maybe it had all been for nothing. Maybe, in the end, the fight had taken more from you than you could ever give back. The victory felt hollow, a brittle shell masking the loss beneath.

And then there was him.

Your heart clenched painfully at the thought of Megumi. You had fought not just for yourself, not just for the world, but for him—for the people you loved, for the ones who gave you reason to keep going. But now, in this empty room, with only the echoes of your failures and fears, you weren’t sure if even that had been enough.

Was he okay? Did he make it out? The thought twisted in your mind, dark and relentless. The last you had seen of him was chaos—the blur of battle, the surge of cursed energy, his figure moving like a shadow through the carnage. You had called out his name, over and over, your voice hoarse, but he had vanished into the storm. And after that, everything had gone black.

What if…?

Your chest tightened, the panic rising like bile in your throat. What if he was gone? What if he had been one of the lives lost to the war? You couldn’t bear the thought. You didn’t know if you could survive that. You couldn’t even think about it.

But the doubt, the fear, gnawed at you like a festering wound. The room around you blurred as your vision swam with unshed tears. It felt like you were trapped beneath the weight of it all—the guilt, the grief, the unbearable thought that maybe, despite all your efforts, you had lost him too.

Your hands clenched into fists, nails biting into the soft flesh of your palms, but the physical pain was nothing compared to the storm inside you. What was the point of surviving if you had lost everything worth fighting for? What was the point of living in a world that felt so empty?

A sob built in your throat, thick and heavy, but you swallowed it down, pressing your palms against your eyes as if that could somehow stop the flood of emotion threatening to break you. You couldn’t cry. You couldn’t fall apart, not now. But the dam was crumbling, the weight of your sorrow too great to bear.

And then, through the haze of your grief, something shifted.

It was subtle at first, just a flicker in your periphery. You blinked through the tears, your breath catching as your blurred vision cleared.

And that’s when you saw him.

Megumi.

He was standing at the foot of your bed, quiet and still, his presence a solid anchor in the storm of your emotions. For a moment, you couldn’t believe it. You stared at him, wide-eyed, as if he might vanish if you looked away. His dark hair was disheveled, his face marred with cuts and bruises, but he was alive.

Alive.

Megumi was there, solid and real, as if he had emerged from the very shadows of your despair. He didn’t speak, didn’t move, but his presence alone was a lifeline—a single thread of light cutting through the oppressive darkness that had swallowed you whole.

Your breath hitched, the sobs lodged in your throat like jagged glass, tearing at you as the tears flowed freely now. You couldn’t stop them, couldn’t hold back the flood of everything you had buried deep inside. Because he was here—he was alive. After everything, after all the loss and devastation, Megumi was still standing.

A small, fragile sob escaped your lips, and with it, the last of your strength crumbled. You reached out for him, your hand trembling, desperate to close the distance between you. Megumi stood there, watching you, his dark eyes softening, though his expression remained guarded. It was as if he, too, had been waiting—waiting for the moment when your pain would overwhelm you, when you would need him more than anything.

You didn’t even realize you were moving until you were in his arms.

Your body collided with his, and the force of your relief shattered whatever fragile walls you had left. Your hands fisted in his shirt, clinging to him as if he were the only thing keeping you from drowning. In a way, he was. Megumi had become the beacon of light in a world that had gone dark. He was your anchor, the one steady point in a storm of chaos and loss, and you held onto him as if letting go would mean losing yourself entirely.

“Megumi,” you gasped, his name spilling from your lips like a confession, like a prayer. Your voice was broken, thick with tears. “I was so scared… I thought—I thought I’d lost you.”

He stiffened for a moment, caught off guard by the intensity of your desperation, but then he relaxed. His arms came around you, hesitant at first, but then more secure, wrapping you in a warmth that seemed to seep into your very soul. The hand he placed at the small of your back pressed you closer, grounding you, keeping you tethered to the present. His other hand cradled the back of your head, his touch gentle, careful, as though he were afraid you might shatter.

“I’m here,” he murmured quietly, his voice low and soothing, but beneath the calm, you could hear the echo of his own exhaustion. “I’m here.”

You shook your head against his chest, the sobs wracking your body with a force you couldn’t control. “I couldn’t… I couldn’t do it without you. I couldn’t survive this if you were gone.”

Each word was torn from you, raw and trembling, as though they had been waiting to be spoken for too long. The fear that had haunted you, the pain of almost losing him, was finally pouring out in a flood of emotion that you could no longer hold back. And Megumi—he was your constant. Your light. The only thing keeping the world from crumbling entirely around you.

His presence, solid and unmoving, was a balm to the wounds you didn’t know how to heal. The warmth of his body against yours, the steady rise and fall of his chest, the soft hum of his heartbeat—all of it was proof that he was real, that he was here, that you hadn’t lost him to the nightmare that had claimed so many others.

You buried your face in his chest, inhaling the familiar scent of him—earth and rain, something grounding, something that had always made you feel safe. His fingers curled in your hair, not with the intent to soothe you, but to remind you that he was here, that he wasn’t going anywhere. His grip was firm, as though he, too, was holding on—not just to you, but to this moment, this fragile sense of peace you had both been denied for so long.

“I thought I lost you,” you whispered again, your voice barely audible, cracking under the weight of your tears. “I thought you were gone, and I—”

“Shh,” he interrupted gently, his voice steady, though you could feel the faint tremble in his breath. He wasn’t immune to the weight of everything you had endured together, and that vulnerability made him feel all the more real. “I’m here. I’m not going anywhere.”

You clung to him, your sobs quieting as the weight of his words settled over you. You didn’t need a grand declaration of love or an elaborate promise. This was Megumi—solid, quiet, unwavering—and that was enough. His presence was enough.

As the minutes passed, your tears began to subside, though the ache in your chest remained. But it wasn’t the same all-consuming despair that had threatened to swallow you whole. With Megumi’s arms around you, you felt grounded, tethered to something real, something you could hold onto. He was the light in the dark, and even in the midst of all your pain, that light gave you hope.

After a long moment, he gently pulled back, just enough to look at you. His fingers brushed your hair from your face, his gaze searching yours, filled with a tenderness that he rarely allowed anyone to see.

“You don’t have to carry this alone,” he said softly, his voice like a whisper in the stillness. “I’m with you.”

Your chest tightened, the tears still clinging to your lashes as you looked up at him. His face was marred by exhaustion, the remnants of battle still etched into his skin, but in that moment, he was everything. He was the proof that you hadn’t lost everything, that there was still something left to fight for, someone to hold onto.

“I was so afraid,” you whispered, your voice raw, breaking under the weight of the words. “Afraid I’d lose you... that you’d be just another name I’d have to carry.”

Your grip on his shirt tightened, your hands trembling. “You don’t know what it did to me... thinking you were gone, thinking I’d never see you again.”

Megumi’s brow furrowed, his expression flickering with something you couldn’t quite name—pain, maybe, or understanding. He stayed silent, but his arms remained firm around you, holding you close, as if he, too, needed this connection.

“I can’t lose you, Megumi,” you murmured, your voice trembling like a fragile thing. “Not you. Not after everything.”

Your words were heavy, laden with the truth you had kept buried for too long. He wasn’t just someone you fought alongside—he was the reason you fought, the light that had kept you going when everything else felt lost. And here he was, standing in front of you, pulling you from the depths when you couldn’t do it alone.

For a long moment, he just looked at you, his eyes dark and unreadable. But then, quietly, he spoke, his voice soft, almost tentative.

“I’m still here.”

The simplicity of it was almost too much to bear. Three words, and yet they held everything. He wasn’t offering you promises or reassurances he couldn’t keep, but in that moment, it was enough. It had to be.

You pressed your forehead to his chest, the tears still slipping down your cheeks, but softer now. “You’re everything,” you whispered, your voice thick with emotion. “I fought for this... for you. I don’t care if the world is broken, as long as I still have you.”

For a moment, there was only silence, your words hanging in the air, heavy with everything you had kept buried inside. Megumi’s chest rose and fell beneath your touch, his breath steady, but there was a tension there, something you hadn’t noticed before. Slowly, he pulled back, just enough to look at you, his gaze dark and conflicted.

His fingers brushed against your cheek, his touch soft, but there was something in his eyes—something raw, vulnerable, like he was standing on the edge of a precipice. He opened his mouth, hesitated, then spoke, his voice low and rough, filled with a weight you hadn’t expected.

“I almost gave up.”

The words hit you like a punch to the gut. You blinked, your breath catching as you looked at him, disbelief flooding your chest. Megumi? The thought alone felt wrong, impossible, and yet here he was, standing before you, saying the words you never thought you’d hear from him.

“I was... ready to let go,” he continued, his voice barely above a whisper, his gaze flickering to the side, as if he couldn’t bear to meet your eyes. “Sukuna was there, pulling at me, wearing me down until I thought... maybe it would be easier. Easier to give in, to just let it all end.”

You stared at him, your heart clenching painfully as the weight of his confession settled over you. He had been so close—closer than you’d ever realized—to losing himself, to disappearing into that darkness. And the thought of it, of him giving in to Sukuna, was almost too much to bear.

“But then... I thought about you.”

Your breath hitched, your eyes widening as his words sank in. Megumi’s gaze flickered back to yours, and this time, it was steady, intense, filled with an emotion so deep it threatened to unravel you.

“You kept me going,” he said, his voice stronger now, more certain. “Even when everything felt impossible, when I thought I was too far gone... I held on because of you. I couldn’t let go, not when you were still here. Not when I knew you’d be waiting.”

The air between you felt heavy, thick with the weight of his words, the truth of everything he had been carrying. And in that moment, you realized just how close you had come to losing him—not just to the war, but to the battle inside his own heart.

Tears welled in your eyes again, but this time they weren’t born of fear or pain. They were tears of relief, of understanding, of love so deep it ached. You had fought for him, but he had fought for you, too—for the chance to stay with you, to not let the darkness claim him completely.

“I couldn’t lose you,” you whispered, your voice breaking, but you didn’t care. “I couldn’t bear it.”

Megumi’s hand cupped your face, his thumb brushing away the tears as they fell, and for a moment, he simply held you there, his eyes searching yours. Then, quietly, with a tenderness that made your heartache, he said, “You’re the reason I’m still standing. You’re everything to me, too.”

[neptunes-sol-angel]

Alright guys! I finally got that tingly feeling that I should do this kind of love reading. I still didn't want to make this a future spouse reading because I honestly overthink the concept, like "um divorces happen!" or some people just don't believe in marriage, but I thought I'd do something adorable and Christmas related. I hope that you guys enjoy!

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Pile One🎄

Their letter to Santa

Dear Santa, For so long I've been in the darkness, alone with the glass pieces of my heart, thinking that it's better this way for me to be on own. I don't believe in fairy tales anymore and my ability to imagine a world where I can be in love with someone and in that same way be loved back. My mind is splintered to where I flinch the minute someone to me gets close or when they mention a promise, that I without a doubt know they won't keep. Socially, I feel numb, meeting allegedly new people, seems to be a broken record in different physiques. If you could grant me any present in the world, would you change my definition of what I know to be love? Falling away from the stranger(s) that used to be who I knew from head to toe, has damaged my beliefs that I'm worthy of something more. And should you succeed in bringing my love, may they be my most divine contradiction in my life. My love will be someone new, yet possess familiarty in which I'll take pleasure in spending the rest of my lifetime finding all of the ways that we just understand each other. The sound of their voice and the words that they speak will be the fire that warms instead of scorching me. They'll be my rock that I won't have to tip toe around. Right now, I ask for their forgiveness for the person that I am right now, but for every tear that I currently shed to release the pain of my troubles in romance, builds my strength to be the person that really loves again, and the confidence to give my all despite my mistakes in giving it to the wrong people. Don't let my reserved aura fool you, deep down, I'm a hopeless romantic, that will work hard to find any and every single way to give you the world to prove the depth of my feelings for you. The same way that I'm learning my lessons, you are too, we both share that agony of why this has to hurt so much, but it's the bitter that goes along with the sweet to lead us to each other in the end.

Your Christmas Traditions:

Life with your partner could already be luxurious, meaning they gift you with presents on a regular basis that are both as an expression of love and desire to get the things that you want, so Christmas, traditionally, will feel like a normal day. What makes it stand out to you guys as a couple is how you guys seem to always unlock a new level of intimacy around this time of the year. For you or them, Christmas could make some not so good feelings resurface and put someone in a mood. Whatever that may trigger this, it usually leads to a peaceful resolution that doesn't just prolong the tension for another day. It's like getting to the root of the issue that'll eventually lead you and your partner to a place of comfort, understanding, and confirmation that this relationship isn't based on surface level things.

Pile Two 🎄

Their Letter to Santa:

Dear Santa, There's this ethereal figure in my dreams that I keep seeing. Without a doubt, I know that this is my person. And maybe it's not realistic to ask for you to make the time go faster for us to encounter each other in real life, but I really want answers, I'm craving to know this person. Their face alone, is enough to put me into hypnosis. Not knowing what their voice sounds like, ignites my obsession. I've never been a believer of the supernatural, or even a big fan of religion, but this sensation of the person of my dreams that makes me desire to stay asleep, has to be an indication that we're spiritually connected. I know this person doesn't say a word in both their presence of visions in day and night, but I have this clawing feeling that you're what home feels like. To the lover of my fantasies, I  know you spiritually, but emotionally, with you, I'll finally have someone that doesn't think my expression of feeling is a foreign language. I could talk to you for hours without getting bored and your nature in every capacity makes me feel that you're out of this world with a love that I'm determined to study and reciprocate. I'm already amazed by how gorgeous you are but indubitably I know I'll be stunned everytime I'm by your side watching you prove to me that magic on Earth is real. You're the breathing proof of it and I can't help but be adored by you and the way that you perceive making the most out of the challenges that you face and conquer.

Your Christmas Traditions:

You and your life partner BREATHE for Christmas. Valentine's day may be special but Christmas is the time that you guys will be all over each other. You guys could go all out this holiday, by buying and wearing matching pajamas, playing board games with each other, watching marathons of Christmas themed movies, maybe you guys have a specific drink like hot chocolate, egg nog, or cookies that you love to stock up on. You guys could also be the type to take a vacation around this time by renting out a cabin, or taking a trip to Disney World. This is normal for you guys and you aren't aware of this jubilant vibe that you have together but it makes others wanting to share the joy you have. Your public presence as a couple during Christmas is the type that will make a person want to use you guys as their mood board or inspiration to daydream about the love that that they'd kill to have. You guys are the power couple in terms of playfulness, affection, and how unique you guys embody your partnership. You could also experience people asking you for advice for how to liven up their own relationships. You guys are just that cute with each other.

Pile Three 🎄

Their Letter to Santa:

Dear Santa, I have a good feeling that the person that I will view as my everything is currently contemplating if there's something that they should change about themselves, but do me this favor homie and give my sweet firecracker this message. You. Yeah you. You know who you are. You are a boss! Walking royalty in this world that's meant to take up space, of course there are gonna be some jerks that want to dim your light, but the people who can't handle how bona-fide and wealthy your aura is, are people who are uncomfortable with the fact that they don't possess the tools to handle the blessing that you are. You were never asking for too much and don't let the grinch or scrooge convince you that you aren't enough. Believe me, I wish that fate would allow me to show up in your life right now, but you're meant to learn how precious your attributes you are. You're a damsel that can save yourself, who is meant to climb into power and achieve many things. I'm currently healing my tendencies of being codependent so that I don't distract you from your prosperity or project my insecurities onto you and make you think that it's you, it's not. Be patient, but don't get rid of how bold you are love or choose sides in how you're capable of being silly and someone with authority. Your strength isn't in your silence, but in your intelligence and maturity to express to others your feelings and what your needs are. You'll always be on top, even on days where you feel like you're at rock bottom. Keep pushing, things will make sense soon. You won't just find me in your happily ever after, you'll find your soul tribe too. And we will ALL match your energy. Trust me. Everything that you think is complicated about you is why we're grateful for you.

Your Christmas Traditions:

You and your life partner share a common tragedy and belief. You guys may have experienced toxicity in your family that inspires the both of you to do things differently with your own family. Christmas time is pivotal for you as a couple, because it influences you to reflect but also to take action on how well you guys do as a household. Your Christmas Traditions could be about trying your best to make sure that there's peace, openess, but most importantly your presence if guys have children together. You could go all out with making sure that they have the best presents, that they have the best indication that they're safe with you guys as parents, and that you make the most pleasant and fun memories that will symbolize how much that not just you and your life partner love each other but making sure that your children know how much they're loved by you.

[wasyago]

unsure if you’ve been asked this before but what is your character designing process?

i have already answered in this post (you can go read it if you want), though it's more jrwi based, so i feel like i can answer again! i doubt I'll end up saying something new but hwhatever who cares dhhdhd

obviously this isn't math, so there's no specific scheme i follow every time, and each design is different and it all varies heavily.

in general, when i start working on a design i already have *some* sort of idea in mind. normally not for the entirety of it, but some bits and pieces here and there that help me characterize the design in my head! i try to get those on the canvas first. they're like key points, and i most likely wont change them.

(and if i don't have an idea, i don't start drawing. and instead scroll through my gallery or pinterest in search of inspiration)

let's take my Gem's recent design as an example! i knew i wanted her to be a squirrel, and i already had squirrel scar and cub designs to base it off. so the key points were big pointy ears, curvy tail, claws. i also knew i wanted her clothing to look regal and floral, and reflect her main base. this is an idea that i haven't fully visualized, but i kept it in mind and knew in which direction i had to move.

after that comes the point where i start making stuff up 👍👍 i enjoy thinking my designs through and making them make sense in my head and be practical. so the process consists of me asking myself questions and then answering them in a design. with occasional "oh wouldn't that be cool" thrown into it.

continuing with gem. she needed to have her clothes be suited for a tail, so her underskirt splits in three parts to make it easier. i still wanted the design to be recognizable as gem and have it resemble her skin; so i kept the white sleeves, the green skirt, the corset. i wanted to make her and scar's designs match, so i changed the corset to green with this long piece of cloth but decided to change the patterns on it. because the brown from the corset was gone, i removed it from her shoes as well and made them black instead, so brown wasn't part of the color pallett anymore. i will introduce pink into the design later, so getting rid of one of the colors wasn't that big of a deal. plus, brown makes her look more down to earth, whereas i want her to look elegant and rich, so its a win/win. i wanted to keep her antlers, but obviously she's not a deer anymore, so i turned them into a crown and made it black to match the shoes. etc etc. i can ramble for three more hours about this hdgshsh.

well, that's how the well thought designs work.

sometimes it's just "im gonna draw all the things i think are fun and cute until i can't think of any" and there's no rhyme or reason to it. that's why things like "doc as a unicorn", one-off series designs, random concepts, aus exist!

sometimes its a "i have no idea what to do with it, so im gonna merge all the layers together and just keep fiddling with it until i figure it out", and that's exactly what happens. if i feel stuck with a design, merging it together and working with both line and color helps a ton, because it helps me to see the design as a whole and i dont have to divide my process and think of which parts im gonna do in color and which in line! recent example is hypno's design. here it is when i didn't know how to make it interesting and the final version:

(funnily enough i still like the first concept, the fact that all the clothes is the same color is quite tasty. but i know that if i needed to draw this design in the future, i would struggle with keeping the clothing layers separated and shading and all that stuff.)

visually i don't think there's much difference between how i design things (?), but the process varies and in my head they're all on like, different tiers.

hopefully this was somewhat helpful! if not it at least let me ramble about my design process which is great hdhsjsh

[casual-praxis]

Okay, so I know I said I wasn't going to do much with this AU since I was focused on a different one at the time (and I still am), but I've been thinking about the post-canon for this AU a bunch and I couldn't get it out of my head.

The designs are fairly simple (most changes occur post-canon), but there's still a few details in there that I'd like to talk about! Peep below the cut for more yappin' if you'd like.

(I just figured out how to add line breaks yeehaw)

I started with Green since I had the clearest picture of her in mind. I like to think they all got a mishmash of traits from the original Link here, so Green has the og Link's ponytail, but its length was divided between her and Red. All in all, she resembles Link the closest but isn't an exact match. I also made the executive decision that she simps for Zelda. She's just really worried about her future girlfriend, okay?

Blue didn't quite turn out how I'd hoped, but if I ever do something more with this stage of the AU, I can always make adjustments. Her hair is supposed to be the fluffiest, matching the og Link's texture. She's a little insecure about it making her look "too girly" or cute since that's not at all the image she wants to have, but she learns over time that being cute and badass can still go hand in hand.

Red is the one I was looking forward to drawing most, but she's still fairly simple as well. She wears her hair in a side ponytail to "not step on Green's toes", but also because she thinks it's cute (she and Blue don't see eye to eye on this early on, as you can imagine). She has a bomb-shaped hairbow that she made herself (tying into her post-canon shenanigans), but I haven't yet figured out when she acquires it.

Vio was supposed to be holding her bow here but I couldn't quite figure out how to draw it at that specific angle, so it's in hammerspace for now. Outside that, Vio's design has the most variety. She's meant to learn emotions over time within this au, and this progression is marked by the flowers in her hair. She starts out with none, but as they journey, Red starts to teach her the basics, and with it weaves Zelda's favorite flower into her braid. Once she joins up with Shadow, she's gifted a violet (because Shadow thinks it's punny, and for subtext reasons) that she starts using to pin her bangs out of her face. The flowers begin to wilt as time goes on, first the wildflowers, then the violet, until none remain and the final act is approaching. Shadow gives her one last violet before dying, though Vio doesn't actually start wearing it until the Four Sword is put back and they remain behind. Lots of lore for this one.

Finally is Shadow, who I'm actually surprised turned out so well. I went back and forth on whether I wanted her to wear the hat or not, but I ended up deciding against it since none of the others wear their hats either. Her hair pretty much acts like Shadow's hat in canon, it moves independently of her and the tips of it are smokey and wisp around. Along with Red, I have decided she is short. It just felt right. She does have claws and fangs, but she keeps them a little more on the down low until a suitably dramatic moment occurs to reveal them.

And that's all that comes to mind for now. I've had this idea floating around in my brain since I got back into the fandom, but never had the motivation to poke it too much and see what it do.

The post-canon is what I've mainly been focused on, so maybe I'll try and doodle a few things for it sometime. I took inspiration from one of the bonus comics in the manga where they all stay split after the sword goes back, so that's the canon ending for this au.

It goes fairly far into the future, with all of them settling into their own lives somewhat independent of each other (they all see each other multiple times a week with the exception of Vio, who travels a lot with Shadow ((who may or may not have been brought back through dubious dark magic rituals))).

The brainrot is real, but hopefully entertaining for anyone who made it this far.

[gumballavocadoharry]

Harry and River;

Bedtime routine:

It was striking 8:00 and River was dancing around to Spongebob episode, mimicking off Patrick doing a silly dance. "Alright, Rivie it's bedtime now." "But I'm not-" River was then cut off by a yawn. "Yes you are," I forgot yawns are contagious, "And so am I." I turned off the Tv and picked River up and took him upstairs. "First it's bath time, then we brush our teeth, then story then-"

"Milk and cookies!" River cheered. I gave way to a small giggle. "And maybe some milk and cookies."

I ran the bath, adding in extra bubbles and toys for River. He was in his room getting undressed before coming into the bathroom. River was wrapped in his teddy bear towel, holding it close to him. "Come on baby, let's get you into the bathie," I took the towel and tried taking it off him, only to be fought.

"No daddy! I'm a big boy," River turned away, "In fact, I can get in the tub myself." My heart broke a little more than it should've. "Are you sure?" He nodded, "But I used to change you!" I cooed, I gently pinched River's cheeks, "I changed your diapies!"

"Daaaad!" I was cut off by. And I thought River's threenager stage was over. I turned around while River helped himself into the tub. The splashes made me turn around. "Okay, how about Mr. Bubbles gets in on this?" I made the already overflowing bubbles in the tub, spill over as the mixture of watermelon scented shampoo and body wash only added to the chaos of the tub.

"I'm splash man!" River coupled that with a big splash in the tub that pretty much soaked me. He spotted my unamused look as I was drenched in 'Splash man's' splashes. "River, you're the one taking a bath," I upped my tone as not to sound testy. "Sorry daddy." He contrited. "Oh, I could never stay mad at my pooh bear." I cooed, while rubbing his head.

"No daddy, Imma big boy...." I pouted a little, "You don't wanna be daddy's pooh bear?" River pouted a little too. It was only then I could see just how much our reactions were alike; we shared a puppy dog pout. "I'm no baby!" He squealed. I sat my elbow on the edge of the tub and put my hand to my cheek.

"I know...." I drifted a little, "It's just.....this world can be so harsh..and keeping you a little baby is my way protecting you." Of course not really, but I did nudge my nose to River's own one. "I love you."

"Love you too dada." He flashed this toothy smile that gleamed innocence. "What harsh world daddy?" I gulped a little, eyes wondering towards the floor. "Mean people who'll hurt you for no reason....bad things....crooks, robbers....like the bad guys on tv except much worse."

River looked worried, "Will they eat all my cookies?" I couldn't help but gasp an awe. "No sweetie, daddy will make sure they don't....I'll protect you...forever,"

"Forever and ever?" "Forever. And that's a promise. With every living being and breath!" I smushed my puckered lips into River's chubby cheeks before getting him out of the bathtub and wrapping him in towel. "Go get into your pj's while I empty the tub."

My mind still flickered over the conversation with River I had. I cleaned the tub just....worrying, worrying about the dangers of the world; now and in the future. When River wants more freedom....I get scared. I want him to grow of course into this capable human being, but at the same time I worry about what might happen to him and how I don't want anything to hurt him.

Everytime I think of teenage River, all I can see is those big green eyes who look up to me, asking for a "cookie." I just can't help but kiss him all over his face and just wrap myself around like a thick shield that would defend him to the death of necessary.

After draining the tub, I met River in his bedroom where he was in his pajamas. I lotioned his body and then dried his hair off before plopping River into his snuggly bed and moving rexie in with him. "Who's ready for a bedtime story?" River raised his and rexie's hand/claw. "We are!" River climbed out of bed and snuggled next to me, making me wrap my arm around him.

"What do you think this story's gonna be about?" River scanned over the cover; a duckling, a cat and a goldfish all had umbrellas in their hands. "Playing in the rain?" I smiled, "Well, let's see."

River sucked his thumb through the whole story, eyes glued to what would happen next. "The end," I closed the book and turned towards River. "Wasn't that a great story?" He nodded looking sleepy. "I know what would help....how about some warm milky?" I cooed a little in my baby voice. I brought River up some warm milk in his favorite green and blue sippy cup with triceratops on it. "Are we all set?" I softly said.

"Yeah," River smacked, taking a break from drinking his milk. "And rexie has his milky too?" Rexie nodded. "Okay, well then that means it's time for my big ferocious dinosaurs to get their goodnight kissies." I pressed my lips to River's cheeks before pressing another one to rexie's. "Goodnight my little dino...." I softly trailed off, watching as River gently closed his eyes and drifted to sleep.

I went back to my bedroom and silently sketched before my eyes became heavy and found myself drifting to sleep as well.

[krii-bolts]

✨N's FLASHBACKS!!✨

OKAY, ITS TIME TO COVER THE LIKE. 3 SHOTS OF FLASHBACK THAT WE GOT Also big thanks to Physics Anon and @runitails for their science contribution on the last Post, Khan and the Nori Closet, when it came to the spirals and their Red Text Equations

Again, EP 4 Spoilers!! Even though its been a while by now..

I'll admit, the following screenshots were not done by me (Cause mine sucked in quality) SO KUDOS TO THE PEEPS I SNATCHED THEIR SCREENSHOTS FROM Caussee I dont remember em (My bad ;-;)

ANYWAYS

^ OH boy her again.. and shes EATING A HUMAN HAND.

I see a lot of people refering her as CYN and honestly. I can't blame em, it fits (Especially with the Solver symbol as their right eye)

Ofc, I also see some simularities between This Drone and Nori (From the braided sides to similar swooped hair) but thats Lackluster Evidence at best and a mere coincidence at worst, so I dont believe in it... But might as well bring it up-

Orrrrr they could be sisters, i just realized. Making Nori 002 and This Drone / CYN 001.... uhoh.

^ Even with a clearer Quality photo, I got not much to say off of this..

What I can say is that its a Human arm, weirdly blacked out, being carried on some... claw? Its weird. This whole screenshot is weird. Gonna wait on this one.

I SHOULD MENTION THOUGH, FROM THIS PHOTO AND THE PREVIOUS ONE, THERES A VISIBLE PALE YELLOW OVERLAW ON THEM + LINES OF CODE.

It does not match the DD vision that we saw in Episode 1 in either, I checked and it was far different then these flashbacks.

I may be stretching it when it comes to these Flashbacks, do keep that in mind lol..

^ This. This scares me. And its where Physics Anon and Runitail's contributions come into play.

This is a fucking Black hole. And while I don't have Melanophobia (Fear of Blackholes), I know well enough the kinds of effects Blackholes can cause..

Apart from the jarring Blackhole, this is the FUCKING MANSION. THAT MANSION, and its being pulled apart so this blackhole is PRETTY DAMN CLOSE.

A blackhole that big and that close, can only spell bad news to the planet its nearest too, and in this case its Earth. That is if its a Regular Blackhole, and I don't its a typical blackhole...

I think Absolute Solver created this blackhole. From the [null] in the center aka "Nothingness" in a computers eyes to the lines of codes that flash behind it. Remember how Eldritch J collapsed in on itself and floated away as a "tiny black ball" in Ep 2??? It's hard to notice, but there's a Gravity Distortion around those balls... like what a Black hole would have.

Finally, lets bring in the Two Equations / Concepts that Physics Anon and Runitail brought it: Technological singularity and Artificial black hole. Artificial Black Hole concept adds more fuel to the possibilities of a Solver Created Blackhole but Technological Singularity?

To put the Technological Singularity concept into a """Shortened""" definition: A hypothetical Future where Technological growth becomes uncontrollable and irreversible, creating unexpected changes to human civilization... While Runi mentioned about Drone civilization becoming either Changed or Consumed, I don't think that's the case..

--------------------------------

Human Civilization, more specifically JCjenson, goes and creates the Drone models. These Models are of Similar, if not the exact same, in intelligence to humans and were created for the need of a workforce thats expendable. Ofc like humans, not everyone wants to be pushed around and exploited by someone else, even if most don't or CAN'T realize this reality. And some rebel, even if its Futile... Some, whoever, were more successful and Dangerous then others. Experiments, Mutated Coding, who knows, but these Special Drones had the chance to rebel and succeed in it too: With a oily cost. Most of these drones were numbered with collars, so that JCjenson maybe could try and get things under control, for they knew what could happen if they didn't keep an eye on them.... They knew what would happen to Human Civilization if their Uncontrolled and Irreversible Technology ever reached earth.

--------------------------------

Sorry this took longer then expected, I uh... was struggling a little on how to do this one cause N's Flashbacks are a little wack when it comes to stand alone theories. Did I stretch information on some? ABSOLUTELY, please yell at me at what things could be different or what I miss cause I probably did miss something.. (Also my brain is telling me to make Nori fanart woooo)

[aggressivenesswhilecrying]

Back at my parents tonight, first night ìn half a month I get to actually sleep with my cats again, crackers has made his place known in my lap, and syrup on my chest, their normal spots.

Crackers does seem to be getting a cold tho, his eyes are leaking a bit, which they weren't doing 12 hours ago, so I think being in the car may have given him a cold in someway, not sure, but I will be keeping a closer eye on him and syrup, just to make sure they aren't getting sick sick. I'm moving their normal place of eating onto my dresser so the dogs can't get their food.

Like normal crackers doesn't like the litter box here, I'll be trying to get a new one soon, one he'll like and feel comfortable in.

They don't really like the cat food I have here, so I will have to change that as soon as I can 9lives they just don't like sadly.

Crackers keeps on wanting outside, but he's not gonna be heading out there since it's getting cold, and it's warm inside, so I don't really want that shock to his system. I want to start harness training them soon. I know I won't have much issues with syrup, if any at all. But crackers will be harder

When we got syrup, I was told she had her shots already, but she was so small, there was no way she did. So I'm going to start to save to have the chipped, and get their shots. I'm thinking about getting crackers fixed, but I might hold off on that untill he starts to spray. If he doesn't spray I think I'm going to just let him be, but untill then, I just gotta keep on watching the two. I don't mind caring for more kittens, and that sort of thing, and I already watch over the two like a hawk, so I wouldn't care all too much if syrup had kittens in the future, but, I'm thinking about it a little, I know I should get them fixed, but I'm not sure if I'm going to just yet.

I need to trim their claws a little, but I have no real clue how to do that, all I know, is syrup keeps accidently getting stuck, and Cracker isn't sure how to retract his claws, so investing in a scratching post or trimming their claws just a little might be something I need to do soon aswell.

Bur, all in all, right now, I need to focus a little more on them, and that's cat updates

[hershelchocolate]

of the songs you listed, whats your favorite lyric from each of them

OUGYUGGHH I LOVE COOL LYRICS

I want you to know in advance I listened to all of these to figure it out sorry this took so long to answer 🥺

Also some of these are gonna be whole verses and you can't stop me The Entire Statement Is Important Okay

Lucky Me: Like a rollercoaster that never ends / I keep wishing it would crash but the tracks just bend --- All this death just proves you're worthy, see!

Self-Proclaimed Angel: Don't try to change the story cause things got gory / a monster who fucks up people's lives when they get bored, see --- I'm not one to play nice / you should've thought twice / before every promise became a lie --- Haven't you heard it's breaking news / all of the crying lies tied your best friend's noose --- You claimed that it's us / that you're innocent / well watch your back cause karma can be a bitch (this song is just so fuckijg good)

Of Matches And Rust: And as your body hits the flame / I'll watch the motions of your melted face / hey ain't that funny, you can't bear the same / sort of agony you forced me to emulate / and as your body hits the flame / you meet the burning of a child's rage / and when they find your battered body trust / that your ashes will be drawn by matches and rust

Ruined Lullaby: Guide me blindly with your friendly lies / so kindly I'll see through your eyes / remind me where do you reside --- "Hush little baby don't say a word" / was the last song he had ever heard / poor mother woke up to a long lost son / the monster's task was already done (THIS BRIDGE FUCKS LIKE HELL)

Like A Disguise: All-seeing eyes / I analyze / I memorize / I can read you like a haunting script --- I will watch you all the while / and wear you like a disguise --- I'm alive but I'm dead / I can feel you in my head / spread my roots deeper into the garden bed / you can watch as I grow / I invade / I infest / I can show you agony that you've never known (THIS OUTRO FUCKS LIKE HELL)

Never Love An Achor: It's a secret I keep tucked inside my chest / with this heart of mine that's guilty, not remorseful / there is love that doesn't have a place to rest / but it would have buried you if it had settled on your shoulders --- There are times when I still wonder about you / You are someone I have loved but never known / and you'll never see the reasons I had / for keeping my claws away when they were close enough to hurt you --- I am selfish I am broken I am cruel / I am all the things they might have said to you --- Do you ever think of me and my two hands and wonder why /// they never held you gently / and wondered why they never had the chance to lose you (THIS ENTIRE SONG IS SOOOOOOO makes me cry every time. I could have put the whole song here)

To Our Colorful Scintilating Future: But when night came / so did the nightmares whispering /// as I shook you held me in your warm embrace / and all my fears they all went away --- I know, we'll be alright / we'll live, live for another day --- Count 1, 2, 3 / tiny mushrooms picked / off from trees / white, pink, and blue / suddenly I felt the trees staring right back at me --- as I shook you held my hand / "I'll be okay" / you muttered in a withered voice --- "darling I'm home" everything was silent / you stood at the doorway your body shaking /// a grim realization is breaking my mind / and piercing, my, heart --- I saw no reason to carry on alone / without you here / I can't be strong /// I should have never stopped moving on --- Under sanguine skies / we watch the world distort and twist before our eyes / but I am glad that we can be together in the end / mutations and death will not deter my love for you / so please / sap my life and live / live for another day (this song is SEVEN minutes I'm allowed to pick a lot here I think)

Ragnarok II: In the carriages behind them / the window is no bar / to the giant raging fire / of an ever dying star --- In the now eternal instant of her loss her eyes grew wet / but instead of tears what falls is golden red as the final sunset --- I've done it though I never knew / the dreams that eat at me were true / a fool I was, hubristic, vain / to think conquest the purpose of my train --- I tried to stop it / but I failed / there's no protection now we are derailed // derailing, yes, its higher need / was reached as soon as it was freed / you heard the call but ran away / you could not stop the coming of this day --- I don't know what the hell she's saying but Raphaella's voice in this outro is so fucking beautiful what the hell

Stranger: In your place / a monster I do see --- I only hoped to understand / this work that drains you so / but I find this metal demon / spinning falsehoods into gold --- You don't understand / I had to keep my nature secret / this was never planned / you were never meant to know --- All this time / I've lived with your deceit // I meant no deceit (ouyughghg makes me think of The OCs)

Right As Rain: Cause you can't rely on lies or hopeful skies no more / without a knock on the door / who are you putting up this act for --- Right as rain / coming up roses / the saying goes / a bouquet / all fine and dandy / or so it goes --- for a shell I've got quite the heavy heart / for those who are at the very start --- then like a pack of wolves starving for a single bite / all those who catch will turn out right as / rain

Pathological Facade: Can I say the instrumental here? It's my favorite part of the song --- A year ago, I was told that I would be a miracle / something theoretical I guess / it's kinda like a psychedelic lie, and yet it tries to be / a line between the villains and the rest --- Bye-bye-bye goes the time, turning on a dime / gone without a reason or a rhyme / so flip a coin let's rejoin our family in the mirror world / where everybody's crooked by design (in all honesty the lines themselves don't really jump out at me TOO much, the song is just so fast it fits how fast I talk normally so it's REALLY FUN to sing in general. GHOST said they were focusing more on rhythm than making sense and by god they nailed it)

OUYGHG SORRY THAT TOOK SO LONG I JUST REALLY LOVE MUSIC

[piece-of-hweat]

Hi I'm back on my Little Nightmare bs again ODJSOID

SO, The Crane Wives' "Coyote Stories" and "Foxlore" albums remind me a lot of Mono and Six's silly little relationship, and now I'm here to ramble about it to you.

Never Love an Anchor - Coyote Stories This song, I've already had a storyboard ready for, but it's old as hell so I ain't showing it lmao The song feels like it's a song Six would sing (if she had the skills to L) to Mono, after The Fall(tm). "On some level I think I always understood that these hands of mine were clumsy not clever. And I tried to do the best that I could, but try as I might, I couldn't bring myself to hold you." I've always imagined that in canon (so not my personal feral-child-Six headcanon), Six has always struggled to show affection to people, especially after the events of The Nest. As a result, she's been very quiet and distant with Mono. I personally believe it's because she's become way too familiar with (always understanding, perhaps) people she's cared about meeting an unfortunate end by her "clumsy not clever" hands. She's scared to be friends with Mono, she's scared to hold him and his hand. And as much as she may try to overcome the fear, she could never "bring myself to hold you". "There's a secret I keep tucked inside my chest, with this heart that's guilty not remorseful." Six feels guilty for every misfortune that came to everyone. Raincoat girl, Mono, and most likely some more people. Of course, she wouldn't share this with anyone, they don't need to know, it'll forever be "a secret I keep tucked inside my chest". "There is love it doesn't have a place to rest- but it would've buried you if it settled on your shoulders." She does love people, there is that in Six, but she's afraid of showing that affection, because from her experiences- sharing that with anyone, Mono included, would've buried him alive. It would've hurt and most likely, killed him- at least that's what Six feels/understands. "On some level I think I always understood that a ship could never really love an anchor. So, I did the only thing that I could and severed the rope to set you sailing from my harbor." On some level, Six understood that she fucking sucks ass bro. Loving anyone like her is a death sentence, she'd lead anyone who wanted to be friends with her to their eventual demise, because that's all she's known. No one could really love an anchor who'd weigh them down beneath the waves and drown them. So, Six concludes that the only way to save them is to take the first step- to start removing the rope (bond) to set them free from her. (…) "And you'll never see the reasons I had for keeping my claws away when they were close enough to hurt you." Mono will never, ever know the reasons as to why Six was so distant, because he's gone- and Six can't really… change that. I also wanna draw attention to the word "claws". Six sees herself as a dangerous monster, with claws and fangs and teeth so sharp it'd hurt anyone she met. She wants to keep Mono safe from her. (…) "Do you ever look at me and my two hands and wonder why they never soothed your fevers? And wonder why they never tied your shoes? And wonder why they never held you gently? And wonder why they never had the chance to lose you?" Six wonders if Mono ever wondered why she was so cold and quiet towards him, when he's been practically anything but mean to her. She wonders if he hates him for everything she's done, or more accurately- everything she hasn't done. Six wonders if Mono hates her for not showing him the kindness he showed her.

Okay that was... a lot. As you can see, this post only analyzed "Never Love an Anchor" from the Coyote Stories. This is simply because the original plan of analyzing three songs ("The Moon Will Sing" - Coyote Stories, and "Allies or Enemies" - Foxlore) wouldn't work out. I' may or may not make two other posts talking about the other two songs I had in mind. I'll probably make two other posts about the songs in the future. But for now, I'll leave you with that non-sense. Have a nice rest of your day/night!!

[vampppeach]

✿ ➜ Dream of Scarlet Sun — Pilot Chapter

Language: English

Words: 1,668

Story Synopsis: Eira is the daughter of Sunsbury's president and she unexpectedly went missing, only to meet what appears to be an angel.

Note: There's much more to the actual plot of this but Dream of Scarlet Sun isn't my main focus right now (since im focused on writting The Gift) so it might have to wait for a bit but i do have interest in continuing it. I decided to post the pilot because it took me a lot of effort and id like to share with more people.

Wake up, go to work, come back home without a worry in the world, be detached from consequences and actions, and live automatically. I may not be the best at my job and I may not have the most friends there, but I still attend, never missing a day. It's not like I'm dedicated either, this office job isn't my goal, nothing is, and not even I can tell why I'm so punctual, maybe it's just easier like this, to conform.

In more than one way, I am a waste of money, waste of time, I should enjoy getting to work at my dad's company, many people dream of having this life, so why do i feel so hollow? How many times have I excused myself from work by rushing into the bathroom to cry? I don't know how the future will be, I don't have any skills or aspirations, and I'm not sure of anything at all, still, I walk forward, too afraid to turn back and defy my father, too afraid to look back and see something I don't like.

With my phone in my hands, I see no notifications, no tasks from work, no one to talk to, I guess that without people, all I'm left with is peace, a peace so quiet, so dull that slowly drains the life out of me. Putting it away, I try to sleep through the silent night, but the fridge buzz keeps me awake. Facing the wall, the concrete texture blurs, and with a closed throat I realize squinting my eyes won't stop the tears from running down my face.

Tomorrow won't be different, it never is. Nothing changes, I never change, and I'm aware of it. Curling into a ball, I'm reminded of the nights I blacked out like this, sobbing to sleep, a hand of mine reaching a lock of my hair to mimic caress, but the muffled sound of my voice following drowning me. I'm not enough, I need change, I need something different, something new.

Snatching the keys from my purse, my mind went blank and before I knew it, I was driving mindlessly with no destination, no direction, just forwards. For a moment, I saw no path behind me, in my trail there was only road after road ahead. Couldn't look back, and even if I did, the darkness of the night had already consumed what was past, the headlights being my only guide, showing me the way.

Soon, the dead trees parted before my eyes, opening the horizon and revealing a starry sky from behind its dry branches, reaching for the moon like thin hands, attempting to grasp its light, unreachable, far away from their dark claws. I found myself at the coastline, boat boarding and unloading point, sparsely habited. Alone, I parked my car near the pier, stepping out to hear the hissing of cold, dark waters, brushing over the sand idly.

It was so dark all I could see was the city at the end of the horizon, far, far away with stars adorning the black pitch above it. Looking up, the moon smiled at me, inviting me for an embrace, to wipe away the tears from my semi-dry cheeks. So beautiful, yet so distant, while on this earth I'll never be as bright as mother Moon whose purpose is known and takes care of the job splendidly.

Smiling back, I accepted her embrace, my black heels clicking over the creaking old wood beneath me, my head facing upwards. The moon in the sky was just too far away, but if I dived right into her cradling arms, her reflection would bring me as close as I could get. To be shiny and seen, watching it all from away, pretty and painless, it's all I desire.

Staring up at me was a bottomless pit, it called me. Her smile was distorted by the light breeze that messed my hair bun and reminded me of my wet cheeks, gapping my wounds again. My eyes drip into the sea, the salty tears becoming one with the ocean and beckoning the cells in my body to join them. Frozen in place, I saw the reflection of a hopeless one with a whole life ahead of her wavering, pondering if she chose the right option. If it were anyone else, I wouldn't want them to dive, id want them to find happiness in life, with a single step back I pulled the sad girl away from her death.

— What are you doing, miss? — With hesitance, a breach bloomed in the moment, the quietude interrupted by the voice of a woman... No, of a man. The tone, soft and tender, made my head turn. Just the sight of Him made my eyes wide, the tallest man I've ever seen, dressed in all white, as pale as can be.

My body trembled, tangled in emotions and thoughts then pulling me down like roots, I fell to my knees but He was right there to catch me, holding me in His arms. The warmth of His body, the gentle grin, made me tear up, sobbing as I brought my hands closer to my face.

— I-I don't know... — I cried, hurt and afraid cradled in the arms of a stranger with a white rose crown, never once opening His eyes. His white hand wiped away the tears that flowed down to my chin, He tilted my head to face Him with the tip of his finger. — You were about to jump into those dark waters. Do you want to talk about it? —

While he tucked the curly hair out of my face I couldn't help but tear up again. — I don't know what to do... I-I think I'm doing something wrong...! — In a cracking voice, I brought both hands closer to my face, trying to hide the embarrassing expression and tears of shame.

— So you've decided that's where your life ends? At an empty, cold beach? I can tell you are lonely, and I can tell you are afraid... That's not where you want to end, Miss Eira. — Holding my wrists, He pulled the hands away from my face, all I could see was that mysterious man's smile. — You deserve more than a life of fear and uncertainty. —

Is it true? Do I deserve better? I'm unsure, I always am. Suddenly the silence of the waves blessed our ears again, this time, the darkness surrounding me became familiar and safe, I had now found light. With tears streaming down my face, I couldn't make a sound, looking into the distance the realization finally hit me. What am I doing with myself?

Crouching at the edge of the pier, He held me carefully, laying me in his arms. — Before meeting light, you must meet darkness. Close your eyes and hold your breath. — I obliged and he laid me above the water, slowly immersing me in. Gradually relaxing after the initial shock of cold water hitting me, His hands let go, and I sank in. Drowning wasn't scary, not to me, it felt like being held once again, like being in His arms.

Morning that same day, the rising sun above Sunsbury, lit up the scenery of a lively garden. Bushes of green, white and red surrounding the black metal bistro table and chair set, beautifully arranged, and yet, stealing the landscape, an old pale man sat, looking fowards. Contrasting colorless, the long wrinkled fingers traced over pieces of an unfinished puzzle, it's white eyes could not see the image, but through palms he felt the shapes, envisioning the object in mind.

Interrupting the silence, a much proper young man dressed in a similar suit walked up to him, carrying a folder between index and thumb and extending it to the other. — Mr. Wolf, your daughter has been reported missing. She was last seen leaving her apartment around 10PM. — swatting the hand away, he didn't even bother to change expressions. — Im busy, come to me when i am not. —

— ...Respectfully, I believe this case is much more urgent than your game. Your daughter could be in great danger sir.—

He did not blink, not even a singular wrinkle motioned towards a change of emotion, Bouchard Wolf sat there, unfazed. — ...Reinforce the security of my apartment. If those criminals wanted to get to me, they shouldn't have come for Eira. — he placed another piece on the puzzle, done speaking. The lack of care about her current situation made Santiago's blood boil, he held back many insults, but the hatred was clear in his voice.

— GPASS is investigating the case. The circumstances of this disappearance seem supernatural, but our team will work through it. — Government Protective Services Against the Supernatural, is such a unique and long name. It's a useless organization, at least to Buchard, all it does is drain money from him since they barely got any supernatural activity after the incident. The thought left a bitter taste in Mr. Wolf's mouth, he did not respond.— ...I'll keep you updated through emails. —

Turning around in disappointment, Santiago was ready to exit that awkward scenario but was interrupted by Bouchard's voice. — Before you go, tell me, what is the picture of the puzzle? — facing back, he looked down at the garden table, noticing the pieces that were put together. A sheep standing over some sort of brown box, bleeding onto a chalice and surrounded by people and angels.

Santiago looked into the sheep's eyes, seeing humanity in its gaze. The artist seems to have little knowledge of drawing animals, the face was uncanny. Looking back at Bouchard, he mumbled quietly. — ...A lamb. It's a picture of a lamb. — a description so shallow that stripped the painting of its meaning, but was enough to make an old man smile. — Ah, yes. This one was my favorite one. — He spoke to himself, his eyes unable to realize Santiago had left him alone in the garden to go back to his shift.

[dragonji]

having a mome below dont worry abt it

sorry in advance but apparently tonight is a real Cannot Fucking Stand This Body Anymore kinda night. I need to get on t so goddamn bad like im terrified of it and how people will react esp like my family but that shit was always going to be complicated anyways and also I am straight up going to kms if I have to live like this for another year .lol♡ . I just. I've worked really hard since living on my own to be even close to neutral on my appearance and voice and bearing and ik its made worse bc its 4 in the morning as I'm dealing with this but its so fucking easy to backslide into the cesspit of resentment and anguish and snarling fury I have at looking and being the way I am currently. I can't stand myself and the ways I know I'm percieved there's no way I can survive the way I am much longer. And it's like being clawed apart slowly from the inside knowing that on the other side of the fear that paralyzes me is so much potential to fall in love with myself in a way I know I can barely imagine- it'll take time to mold my body into what I tentatively let myself fantasize about sure but at least it will be Something. I dont expect to become ethereal or worthy of reverence or anything so grand of course but I can't help but be feverishly consumed with hunger to know how I'll change. To know what my voice will sound like- will my register finally expand to those low growling tones and gravely rumbles that I hear in my mind sometimes when I invision some far-future version of myself? Will I finally be able to build and keep muscle, enough that I can look at my body and think this is capable and useful and will serve the purposes asked of it, instead of being just another thing to bury under pretty distractions to keep anyone from looking closer? Will I ever even get to a point that I Could let anyone look at me without feeling the need to raise my hackles or run or make excuses? Its not that I don't like decorating myself in nice clothes and jewelry and all kinds of little details, I just want so badly to believe that one day I could do it just for the fun of it and not as layers upon layers of defenses to keep myself and hopefully others from thinking about the form underneath. I'm losing the plot to all the white-out longing in my head but yeah all that to say. I wish I were able to find pride in my physical self. I wish I had a form I could think of as anything more than an inconvenience at best. This one is so selfish and will never be acted upon but I wish I were able to let myself be desired too. I wish I had the courage to make some choice, anything really, to progress towards the possibility of ever having any of that. But in the end I cower from change even ones I know will make me happier because they always risk upsetting someone and if I'm the only one left sick with anguish well. That's just basic math isn't it? Better to be the one stuck with all the suffering than being the one shattering it out in an impact crater I can't even attempt to hide is my fault. So I'll just keep not reaching out and playing down how gutwrenchingly sick I am on the daily to be living this way. And if I just tell myself enough times that it's fine, that I don't Need any of the things I want, that obviously desire is the root of suffering and as such it's only right that I abstain from even the most benign of my own, well it has to be true eventually, doesn't it?

[toshkakoshka]

6/29/2024 - some contemplations about tristan

"did you force the 'i love you' in the letter too?" i asked him.

his eyes met mine. "no."

i love my friend. i've been in love with him since the day i saw him. it'd never been in the romantic sense, but it sure felt like it to everybody including me back in the day. a solid fucking 7 years back and suddenly i realize how much i've just... wanted him. the closeness. the intimacy. a beautiful boy with a face an artist could only carve.

a friend. a brother.

i don't know if it'd be appropriate to say that, really. but i keep it in my mind. tucked away at the back where i realize, beyond the insanity and idiocy of our friendship, that i always kept it in high regard and as much love as i could give it.

it's really the most i've ever talked about with him today.

i'm leaving for singapore in two weeks, it's the most unreal thing i've ever thought about. i'll be away from friends, be made to have a new set of friends in school in that country for a year, but i'll come back and... then what? will my friends forget me too?

it's... difficult. it's difficult to love. to see a relationship grow and wither away as time passes by. that's a fear i've always had with people i've wanted to be close to me.

a boy i've fallen in love with in such a strange way told me he loved me too.

there's something so inexplicable about this nature of care. between friends, it's something that he's always been new to. the familial pain that he's gone through, the surroundings of masculinity, his importance for such a romance was all melted down and pouring into his being. it was slowly chipping away, forming some kind of shape in his barriers with the way i held onto him.

today was weird. but we annoyed him into coming over, and he wrestled me into the ground where that familiar teenage lust was boiling back up when he had me pinned to the ground.

but the change, despite it being hours later, was whiplash.

our other friends left and it was just us now. i sat next to him and we started talking up another therapy session for him.

he was still in love despite the heartbreak. he was still in pain. he just needed comfort, so i gave it to him.

i held him as i started to sink down next to him. he talked, i talked.

i tucked myself under his arm when i started talking, finally thinking what i was realizing. my friends were going to leave me. i was going to leave them, too.

my friends were going to leave me. sooner or later, in the future but not so far from now, they will disappear.

and then, after a year of numbness, a year of broken psyches and repression and emptiness and desperation, i broke.

my fears were clawing upwards into me. the first noise that shattered the air, that screwed my eyes shut in the unreal catch of my throat was a sob.

and then he shifted, and as i cried, he said, "come here."

he held me. i tucked my face into his neck while i started to cry my eyes out. laying half my body on top of his, i was wailing all my fears and all my pain and all everything that felt so wrong in this reality.

i had no real thoughts behind these actions. it was almost like it was instinct, an unusual development. i was terrified of losing friends, forgetting if they ever loved me. i babbled into his neck crying about how much i loved him.

i said it so many times, and each time he told me he loved me back.

i've never felt so safe like that. this kindness was alien to him as much as it was to me. its intimacy was something i'd been so starved on, something he never knew could be possible between friends.

but now that he's gone home, and i'm finally in a silent room, there's still something so... unreal about it. the aspect of safety. security. hesitance, but comfortability. i'm going to sleep with the memory of his warmth on my body. his arms around me, his mutterings of 'letting it all out'.

and i was thinking, in the middle of it all, how much he'd grown from his fears of me, of friendship's love, of closeness at all.

i told him i loved him.

he told me he loved me back.

and i remember thinking, in the middle of tears and a tightening cling, "what a strange thing."

[lifesfeelings]

First "Breakup"...

My favorite thing that I just noticed is that I really only come back to Tumblr when things aren't going well 😂 I always want to keep posting here, for my own records, but when I have somebody in my life to vent to, I forget that I have this space! but anyway... So, I posted about him a handful of times I think. Sebastian? We met on Tinder back in April and we've been steadily getting more and more relationship-y. I thought that I was stringing him along. I really liked him, and if I was gonna make a relationship work, it would have been him. We don't live in the same town, but we made the trip to each other a handful of times, we texted everyday, we always were talking about the future: our halloween costumes we'd do together, Christmas plans, shows we were gonna watch together, plans for me to meet his parents, etc. We never made anything official, but I thought he was down bad... I kinda was "losing interest." Not in the sense that I wanted any other guy, but I sometimes think I'm aromantic and I just felt like it was getting too real. I wanted to run away. But... since Saturday, I have in fact learned that I am probably not aromantic and that I instead just have issues... He ended it out of nowhere. I've been obliterated. I can't go more than a few hours without crying, and they've been titanic like meltdown sobs... I can't get homework done. I can't focus on anything. I just came to my office (knowing I have fucking office hours and my students can come in at any time), and just finished sobbing for about two hours straight. He said that he had "felt nothingness come over him" a few months ago and that he had hoped it would go away with time. He said he just had lost the spark. And it's been fucking UGLY... I spent the weekend doing everything I thought I could. I did everything I thought I could do to claw back at his heart. I told him how much he meant, I apologized profusely for being a bit more cold and reserved the last like two weeks. I wrote him a fucking letter basically telling him how torn the fuck up I am and that I respect his choice but I'll be there if he changes his mind. I keep trying to think of the fucking perfect string of words that will move him, the "romantic acts" I could try, the posts that will get his attention... And it's just an endless cycle having to remind myself that it's over. This wasn't some skirmish or something I was doing that I can correct. He, in his heart of hearts, just truly doesn't feel it for me anymore. And he tried to let me down easily, but I kept pushing and the more I reread his texts the more clear it is to me that he has nothing for me... He said he wanted to be friends and all that. He said that maybe in time things will change. But in the letter, I basically told him that I wasn't going to hold my breath but that it would be a good while until I was done. That he could come back and I'd be there. and he basically was like "I hope that this hasn't ruined future endeavors or made you more hesitant with guys in the future" and was just politely basically telling me that it's not fucking happening... I just don't think I've been this wholly destroyed... My grandma passed away a year ago (in two days actually...). She was my best friend and the love of my life. And, this feels cringey to even be saying and thinking, but I've been taking this harder than I took that... I could bottle with her death. I could put it away and pretend that I'd be okay. I was able to keep going. This stuff with Sebastian has stopped my life. It feels like I lost the one thing that was keeping me here in line. I think between moving away from my past life, and starting a new school and new jobs in a new city.... I think Sebastian became my only rock and the only thing I could count on in my life that kept me grounded. and now he's just gone without warning. without anything I can do. I don't know what to do... I'm eviscerated. I just want this life to stop for a little bit.

10.09.23

[mishihao]

supportive creatura

[minkmousesworld]

⌞ꜱᴘᴇᴄɪᴀʟ⌝

𝔲𝔫𝔦𝔳𝔢𝔯𝔰𝔢: forest au

𝔴𝔞𝔯𝔫𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔰: interspecies relationship

⚠ penetration (♀ receiving / ♂ giving), knotting, some primal kink, breeding, marking (bite), sex during the rut / heat, dommale elements

𝔡𝔞𝔯𝔩𝔦𝔫𝔤(𝔰): raccoon dog! Tanjirou Kamado x wolverine! Reader

Tanjirou was a good boy.

He did everything his parents said: "don't go far from the nest", "don't interact with unfamiliar predators" and "scream when you're attacked." And Tanjirou did this — he stayed close to the nest, communicating only with familiar predators, so he didn't even have to shout when attacking.

Tanjirou was a good boy. Until he met you.

You were a wolverine — an animal that even bears shun.

Tanjirou was already an adult tanuki who had to leave his home. However, it was the end of winter, the beginning of spring snowmelt, and the young were just breathing in the smell of future freedom.

You have already been released from sensitive parental supervision. Last spring (or the year before?) parents let you out — the wolverines were known for keeping their children in their nests for a short time, as was each other's company. "Out of sight, out of mind."

Unlike raccoon dogs.

You liked Tanjirou's family, though. They were good. Tanjirou was good, too; he sweetly smiling whenever he saw you, sometimes offering a portion of food, and timidly holding out shiny things or flowers.

Like wedding gifts. You accepted them and gave him something in return.

Tanjirou blushed sweetly when you brought him a small prey in the form of a hare or bird, and told you that "you shouldn't have bothered so much...".

He was as obedient and gentle as a perfect husband.

That's probably why Tanjirou was trembling under you with overexcitation — in your hickeys, bites and scratches, with his cock standing up and bleeding pre-ejaculate, he was waiting for your actions, legs spread wide, like your personal shameless toy. With his cheeks bright pink and his mouth slightly open, Tanjirou was panting, trying to grab you with his trembling hands and pull You even closer so that you could ride / enter him again.

Tanjirou made foxy noises, beckoning You closer, as if begging you to continue, and smelled so sweet, making You even more intoxicated. First heat.

He was so sweet when he was aroused by desire.

Or throw you to the ground and climb on top of you, and then continue to fuck nonstop like rabbits until one of you gets pregnant. His instincts told him that he should hide you from predators and mate until one of you became pregnant with a brood.

It's not your fault that he went further than before. It's not your fault he got into your territory. It's not your fault that he got into your hole, although he should have smelled the animal in heat / rut. It's not your fault that your smell triggered the early rut.

His tail quivered as his fingers gripped your thighs, clawing at Them, trying to get even closer

But it's your fault that Tanjirou now has the marriage mark on his neck, and he's in this position — submissive, needy, and whimpering when you move away to get better.

You, as older, must take responsibility.

The knot at the base has already begun to swell inside, locking you together.

[♀] You feel very full when the knot enters you. Tanjirou's body temperature is higher, so along with the stretch comes the heat, which makes your hole throb harder, and you squeeze around the dick even tighter. The knot gently stimulates you, swelling and slowly stretching until you feel full.

[♂] You feel Tanjirou's stomach swell and fill with your knot, causing his hole to tighten around you even more, trying to lock you inside. He shivers, taking in a cock that's too big for the first time — to the point where you can feel it just by putting your hand on his stomach.

You saw his bushy tail swaying from side to side as the knot swelled even more. Tanjirou gave a short sob, as if to warn you that he wouldn't last long, and pressed his lips to yours. His eyes were watering from the intense, unaccustomed stimulation, making him more defenseless

Tanjirou, on the other hand, made cute noises as he turned restlessly, and, insistently poking his nose into your face and neck, licked the mark. His body trembled from the stimulation.

Although future responsibility was hard to think about when Tanjirou was licking you like a puppy again, knocking you to the ground and now having the advantage..

Tanjirou kisses you before nuzzling your nose, making soothing noises as you feel the climax build up — the knot has already become too big.

"I'm so happy… Thank you for agreeing to making with me... P-puppies… I love you…"

"I'm sorry… I'm sorry… I'm so sorry... I... I'll take care of you... Really take care of you... Please… Our puppies… They will be strong… Please... I... I love You…"

The knot deflates suddenly, falling sharply, even without the need for "uncoupling", and immediately gives a strange feeling of relief along with the tension and pressure. Tanjirou tries to snuggle even closer, as if trying to create an imitation of the same fullness, and kisses you again, without even giving the impression that he plans to leave.

"W-we are now… Are we a family now?.. Please take care of me…♡"

You only bite Tanjirou's neck again, which makes him sob even louder, but his body presses even closer, as if in an effort to merge. His fingers grip your shoulders, squeezing them until a thin, short trickle of blood slowly begins to flow from your neck.

"I-I hope I'll be a good husband to you!... I will not fail your trust…"

You've cared for each other and spent the night together. You should become a couple. After all, doesn't Tanjirou look like the perfect partner for anyone? He will be a great mate to care for your puppies.

Raccoon dogs are great parents.

While licking your neck, Tanjirou nudges you with his nose, drawing your attention. And in his eyes, sparkling with excitement and tenderness, sparks burn as his fingers slide lower — and begin to caress you again, creating circles on your stomach with gentle touches.

"Your smell hasn't changed… Do you still need my help? I'm always happy to make you happy! After all, I want to be a good husband to you…♡"