#i don't know how people are using italics in the comments section
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plusultraetc · 1 year ago
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there truly is no greater struggle, no more profound hardship, than me trying to use ao3
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So, the DfE have released their non-statutory guidance for schools on "gender questioning children". I know much has been made of the idea of outing trans children to their parents, but I think the guidance actually has far more concerning sections. And by concerning I mean "deeply transphobic and fucked up".
I know some people are happy it's non statutory, but let's be explicit, this document is transphobic, it's dogwhistle politics, and it's existence will directly harm trans people.
Ironically, the DfE's own lawyers have advised that this guidance is likely illegal and contravenes the equality act.
I think the idea that there are lots of students who are fully transitioned in school but not out at all at home is a bit of a strawman from both sides. In my experience (and I've mentioned this on tumblr before), a school would not normally encourage this if a student was genuinely at risk at home if outed, because even if all the teachers knew not to out the students, you can't control the behaviour of other students/parents etc. I think it's a bit of a right wing scare tactic "Schools are transitioning your kids without your consent". It's a fascist dog whistle.
In my experience as a teacher, the vast majority of trans kids I've taught were transitioning socially at home and school. Some did only use their chosen name/pronouns in school, but parents were aware.
But this straw man has been used to build a document which is deeply transphobic and wide reaching and will defacto exclude some trans kids from school, or from school sports, or from attending a school where they feel comfortable.
Trans kids exist. Kids can know they are trans from a young age, and there is no harm to anyone from allowing social transition at a young age. Some kids transition back to their assigned gender at birth. That doesn't mean anyone was harmed. But this guidance explicitly presents the idea of transition as both harmful to the person transitioning and those around them. Which is fucked up.
The new guidance has some really concerning bits in it which will seriously negatively impact all trans students. Here are some quotes below, with my comments in italics. Please note I'm quoting directly from a document that uses transphobic language:
-Primary school aged children should not have different pronouns to their sex-based pronouns used about them. (This is fucked, I cannot stress how fucked this is. These kids exist and simply pretending they don't is awful in the extreme. The idea that children can't socially transition at primary school is really messed up. )
-schools and colleges should only agree to a change of pronouns if they are confident that the benefit to the individual child outweighs the impact on the school community. It is expected that there will be very few occasions in which a school or college will be able to agree to a change of pronouns. On these rare occasions, no teacher or pupil should be compelled to use these preferred pronouns. (How does a child using pronouns of choice impact the school community? It doesn't? In my experience, teens are much more accepting of trans classmates than some adults. Also giving teachers explicit permission to misgender kids is fucking dangerous).
-schools and colleges should exhaust all other options, such as using firstnames, to avoid requiring other individuals having to use preferred pronouns. (My initial response to this was "why the fuck" but a trans friend commented that the purpose is to make trans people's lives as difficult and as miserable as possible, and they're going after the most vulnerable trans people- trans kids)
-If a child does not want to use the toilet designated for their biological sex, and the school or college has considered all the relevant factors outlined above, they may wish to consider whether they can provide or offer the use of an alternative toilet facility. (this is weird because I'm pretty sure it contravenes the equality act, I'm pretty sure there is a legal duty on schools, and certainly colleges where over 18s attend to provide gender neutral toilet facilities if required. Also, not having an appropriate toilet defacto excludes children from school).
-Schools may have different uniform requirements for girls and boys. Some specify which uniform items are for girls and which are for boys, and similarly some schools have hairstyle rules which differ by sex. A child who is gender questioning should, in general, be held to the same uniform standards as other children of their sex at their school and schools may set clear rules to this effect. (So some schools could, for example, force a trans boy or non binary student to wear a skirt. Which is unfair and messed up. To be honest, I think sex segregated uniforms belong in the dark ages anyway, but this is just ridiculous.).
-There is no general duty to allow a child to ‘social transition’. (Firstly, there legally is. Secondly, why would a school not want to? This just gives licence to transphobic heads to say "oh, no, we won't allow you to transition", which is illegal, but the whole thing is just such a fucking mess. And again, why? Why would you not allow a child to transition socially? Unless you want to pretend that trans children don't exist?)
If you want to read the full guidance, it's available here, but trigger warnings etc do apply: https://consult.education.gov.uk/equalities-political-impartiality-anti-bullying-team/gender-questioning-children-proposed-guidance/supporting_documents/Gender%20Questioning%20Children%20%20nonstatutory%20guidance.pdf
Yes, the guidance is non-statutory, so in theory schools could ignore it, but in reality, OFSTED etc can use non-statutory guidance as a stick to beat schools with. At this stage, I think we all know the OFSTED don't give a fuck about anyone's mental health or wellbeing.
Interestingly, even the DfE's own lawyers have admitted the advice could open schools up to a legal challenge. This SchoolsWeek article on the topic is super interesting: https://schoolsweek.co.uk/trans-guidance-dfe-lawyers-said-schools-face-high-risk-of-being-sued/
Anyway, whilst the fact it's non statutory is something, this is not the victory some people are making it out to be, and the fact a document encouraging misgendering children has been published at all is fucked. This document could very much be used to prevent children from transitioning, and will likely prevent some children who have transitioned from attending school.
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sugaredrhubarb · 24 days ago
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A QUICK GUIDE TO AO3 CUSTOMIZATION FROM SOMEONE WHO KNOWS NOTHING ABOUT CODING
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ft adding pink to everything and my secret to writing long comments
note: I originally posted this to twt but if that place burns in a fiery pit I spent too long on this for it to disappear, so I'm putting it here too :)
so many people know way more about this than I do, but this is a step-by-step walkthrough of the changes *I've* made, and hopefully it works as an introduction people can build from for whatever they'd like to do
There are a lot of images in this post! (click to enlarge)
to start, AO3 skins
site skins change how the AO3 website appears when logged in (even on mobile), mine is pink and blue!
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I'll have my skin turned off throughout the post so the guides appear as they will for you
to create, edit, and view skins, go to the "skins" tab from the left-hand menu. you can also view public site skins from there or from the button in the preferences.
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public site skins are made by other users. i would really encourage previewing and exploring them to become familiar with the possibilities (maybe you just want to use one of them and now you're done!)
to create your own skin
on the skins page, click "create site skin"
if you don't know CSS (same), use the wizard! clicking on the "?" will give more information about each option
I only use the colours section you'll see a link right there for hex codes I use pink as a header colour and bue for accent but lots of people change the background colour and that looks really cool!
submit
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The next step is to add CSS from a public skin to your own. I use "ByLine" by Branch. this separates the tag categories and adds spacing to make them easier to read.
here is a before and after using the fic "Landslide" by @roosterbruiser as an example
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to see the CSS of a skin, click the title
copy all the text below the CSS heading
in the skin creator/editor press the custom CSS option and paste all the text into the CSS box
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you can have both wizard and custom CSS settings, in mine you can see the header and accent colours as well as the CSS
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level up: USERSCRIPTS
userscripts are small pieces of code that modify a website. for AO3, this may involve adding shortcuts and buttons or even advanced tagging functions (computer people, I'm so sorry if this is wrong, I'm trying). I use Greasy Fork and Tampermonkey.
This is how I write long and formatted comments!
Greasy Fork is an archive of userscripts and Tampermonkey is a browser extension and userscript manager. You don't need to use these two in particular. please use your common sense when downloading anything or adding permissions to your browser.
Greasy Fork guide on installing fics
Install Tampermonkey on Chrome
there are TONS of user scripts for AO3. This is another good opportunity to explore all the possibilities. there are lots of more complicated options I haven't explored.
scripts for AO3
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i use this floaty review box
and this comment formatting
EDIT: if you use chrome you might need to turn on developer mode in your chrome extension manager - you can google "tampermonkey developer mode" and it should explain that :)
to install (once you have Tampermonkey installed):
open the script you want in Greasy Fork and press install
Tampermonkey will open, press install again
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clicking the Tampermonkey extension will let you toggle scripts on and off, and opening the dashboard will let you view, edit, and delete scripts
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i find i can only have a few turned on at a time before they cancel each other out, but that depends on which ones you're using and someone more savvy might be able to fix that
how to use the floaty review box - write more comments!
there will now be a "floaty review box" button at the top of the work, it will open a floating text box you can move anywhere on the page. highlighting any text and pressing the insert button will paste the text with italics into the box
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anything you type in the review box will appear in your comment at the bottom of the page!
if you have also installed the comment formatting script, you'll be able to highlight any text in your comment and use the new buttons above the comment box to format it
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thats all ive got! Hopefully this is a good starting point to get familiar with some of the terms and basics for skins and scripts <3
if you want some inspo for how to comment on fics i made a whole fic rec list on twitter based on comments I've left, it's here. i have a masterlist of recs there mostly for darklina/reylo and similar ships.
the tag #reading with ru has cod recs and me talking about books
:)
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f3mme-f4tale · 8 months ago
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☾ bound by bloodshed ☾
part three
⇠ part two - part four ⇢ word count: 6.2k potential warnings: needles, stitches, sexual content (mdni pls!), brief sub!ellie, mild odaxelagnia, explicit language, praise kink, cunnalingus (r recieving), fingering (r & e recieving) pairing: seattle!ellie x female reader ☾ mood board authors note: the middle section is a flashback that takes place right before part one, which is indicated by italics. also, i don't really write smut so pls keep that in mind lmao. also this dynamic is literally i don't smoke by mitski
FREE FREE PALESTINE!
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It’s a few hours later when the sun is deep below the horizon and you’re just under fifty miles east of Jackson. You’ve made residence for the night inside what appears to be remnants of an office building. Ellie tries to stay still as you unwrap the bandage, keeping her jaw clenched tight. She focuses on taking deep and even breaths, and she finds it painful whenever you apply pressure and tug on the wound.
She does her best not to make a fuss, but you can see her wincing in pain and fighting to stay still as you treat her. A bead of sweat falls down her forehead, and her skin is flushed. You know she's not having the best time right now, but she's just trying to get through it.
A sewing needle is mocking Ellie from its place on the table, your hands fumbling through your supplies for any sign of thread. Finally victorious, you use your teeth to cut the material, tongue wetting the end to make it easier to work through the needle. 
"Ellie, have some water" you lecture, dumping the remaining alcohol from earlier over her arm, which causes the girl to hiss at the pain. "No use in me fixing you up if you're going to die from dehydration." Ellie shakes her head, despite the thirst that fills her throat. She's trying to be as strong as possible, not wanting to let you see how much discomfort she's in right now.
"I can keep going without water," she says, her face flushed a little bit. "It's alright." But Ellie isn't actually as sure of this as she makes it sound. She knows she probably should drink some water, but she doesn't want to admit it.
"God, you're so irritating sometimes" you mumble, grabbing your own container of water and forcing it into her hands. Ellie snickers slightly at your comment, the first little smile escaping her lips in the entire day.
She takes the water and takes a sip of it, feeling the cold, refreshing fluid slide down her throat. Ellie lets out a deep sigh of relief and takes another sip. "Thank you," she says quietly. You can tell that she really appreciates it, but she also doesn't want you to know just how exhausted and tired she's feeling.
"’Course," you smile at her. Ellie smiles back, though it barely reaches her eyes. You're just patrol partners, she reminds herself. She's not allowed to have feelings for you. And yet, she can't help but feel something. She keeps drinking from the water, not letting go of it yet. Just a few more sips, she promises herself.
You’re clueless to the sight above you, fingers working diligently to make the process go by as smoothly as possible. You push the edge of the needle deep into Ellie’s arm, skin ripping and exiting from the other side. The yellow spongy tissue is speckled with pink, pulling as you attempt to knot the thread. 
Ellie watches as your eyes stay focused, the way you hold yourself as you line the tip of the needle to the edge of the opening of the wound. The sight of you – hands covered in her blood and knees between her legs – has her so turned on that she has to dig her nails into her palm, fingers turning white at the pressure. “Am I making you feel sick?” She prods, pushing your leg with her knee.
You scoff at her, using some of your water to attempt to clean off the blood that has stained your fingertips, shaking your head at her insinuation. Admitally, you’re attracted to broken people. 
“Wanna see something?” Ellie asks sheepishly, avoiding your gaze as you wipe your hands on your pants, handing her a clean bandage to place on her arm. You rarely see her like this, your interest immediately piqued. 
“Uh, sure? As long as you’re not planning on flashing me or something,” you jest, shoving your shoulder against hers. She doesn’t respond to this, instead throwing her bag in her lap and dumping out its contents. 
Curious, you lean in closer, your eyes widening as you realize what she's holding – a Walkman. It's a relic from a bygone era, something that of course Ellie would have. "Where’d you get that?" you ask, unable to hide your surprise. Ellie's grin widens, a hint of pride in her expression. 
"I had it when I was living in the Boston QZ, before Joel and I came out here," she explains. "It broke a few years ago and finally, after some tinkering, I managed to get it working again." She slides a tape in, presses a button, and the familiar click of the cassette tape being engaged fills the air. A moment later, the tinny sound of music pours forth from the worn headphones, the melody faint.
Soft acoustic guitar chords accompanied with a man’s voice enters your ear and you realize you almost forgot what music sounded like. You immediately sigh at the welcomed calm that overtakes you. 
"Do you mind if I just rest for a few minutes?" she asks, sounding a little exhausted. "I know we have to move soon, but just for a few minutes so I can..."
"We got the whole night here, Els," you whisper, taking the walkman from her. She smiles softly as she leans her head against your shoulder, finding herself comfortable in your presence. She glances at you, noting the weariness in your eyes but also the kindness and empathy in your expression.
Despite all this, she can't help but take notice of how close you two are right now. Her head resting on your shoulder. Her body pressed up against yours. Just friends just friends she chants, but she can't deny how comfortable she feels with you right now.
She closes her eyes, attempting to let sleep wash over her slowly. Your heart aches for her. This closeness is something you’ve ached for these past few weeks. You have to remind yourself that she doesn't want you, no matter how much you long for her. "Oh, Ellie,” you mumble, just above a whisper.
"Hmm?" Ellie hums, her eyes still closed.
She's half-asleep now, and the weariness is slowly creeping up on her. But she can hear your voice so faintly, and she wants to listen. She adjusts her position slightly, wanting to lean against you completely. She can't deny it – being this close to you is addicting.
"What is it?" she asks quietly. "Did you say something?"
"O-oh, no sorry. Just um, thinking is all," you sigh. "Go back to sleep." Her headache is starting to get worse again. But she doesn't seem to care much. She can't stay awake much longer. She tries to ignore her fatigue and discomfort and leans into you further, wanting only to rest, just for a few minutes.
Her eyes are shut tightly, but she hopes to hear you again before she falls asleep. Without even thinking about it, she curls herself onto you and wraps her arm around you.
You lean your head against hers, clutching the water bottle in your hands. Your eyes wander over to the door, suddenly aware of the fact that just anyone can barge in. You force myself to stay awake – despite the pain. You have to protect her. As Ellie sleeps, you can feel the pain in your side worsen. 
You can feel her heartbeat through her chest, and you are both so close that you can feel her breathing on your face. You let her engulf you, afraid that you’ll never experience this closeness again. Your eyes suddenly feel very heavy, and it was no use; not when the exhaustion and the warmth of Ellie were so convincing.
⭒⭒⭒⭒
The echoes of multiple string instruments echoed throughout the hall, a few folding tables lining one end of the large room. Orange fluorescent bulbs were string to the rafters, the quaint scent of roasted meat and the soft humming of the generators making your chest swell. 
Pew bunches have been pushed to the back and against the wall, allowing for a group of townsfolk to congregate in the middle and dance along to the folk music playing from the speakers. You’re humming along to Little Sadie by Crooked Still as you watch Dina maneuver across the dance floor with another gentleman, who she is clearly showing off in an attempt to garner attention from her ex-boyfriend – to which you roll your eyes at. You make a bet with Ellie that they’ll be back together in two weeks, as you both laugh at Jesse’s failed attempts to not drool at the sight of her. 
So when Dina makes her way towards the three of you, you’re caught off guard when she takes Ellie’s glass of whiskey and downs it, proceeding to pull the woman towards the middle of the room. As you hear Ellie call Dina a dick in response to her mocking the man, you feel a twinge of jealousy in your gut. You’re aware of Ellie’s obvious crush on her best friend, as is half of the town, Joel included. Yet, that doesn’t help the gnawing bitterness that forces its way up your spine and through your fingertips. 
"Looks like Dina's pulling out all the stops tonight," Jesse remarks, a hint of amusement in his voice.
"Yeah, she's really laying it on thick," you reply, trying to sound nonchalant. You force a smile in response, but inside, your heart feels heavy. You've known Ellie for years, and though you've never admitted it aloud, you've harbored feelings for her that run deeper than friendship. But seeing her gaze fixed on Dina, the way her eyes light up when they're together, it's a painful reminder that you may never be more than just a friend to her. You can't shake the feeling of being left out, of watching from the sidelines as Ellie's attention is drawn elsewhere. 
Jesse nudged you, breaking your reverie. "Hey, you alright there?" he asked, concern evident in his voice.
You forced another smile, nodding. "Yeah, just enjoying the music," you replied, though the words felt hollow even to your own ears.
But Jesse knew you well enough to see through the facade. He gave you a sympathetic look before turning his attention back to the dance floor. "You know, sometimes it's okay to admit when things aren't okay," he said softly.
His words struck a chord within you, and you couldn't help but feel a surge of gratitude for his understanding. "Thanks, Jesse," you murmured, appreciating his silent support. Despite this, loneliness blankets you, wrapping you in. 
You find yourself retreating into the background, music and laughter of the evening fading into the distance as you wallow in your self-pity. And then, unexpectedly, Ellie breaks away from Dina and makes her way over to where you're standing, her expression soft with concern.
"Hey," she says softly, reaching out to touch your arm. "Are you okay?"
You force a smile, though it feels brittle and fragile. "Yeah, just... lost in thought," you reply, unable to meet her gaze. But Ellie isn't fooled by your facade. She studies you for a moment, her eyes searching yours for answers. And then, with a sigh, she takes a step closer, closing the distance between you. She nudges your shoulder with her own, raising her own glass in salut and you both take a sip.
“‘M just feeling sorry for myself and whatnot,” you mutter, awkwardly switching the weight on your feet. 
Ellie's expression softens, a flicker of understanding crossing her features. "I get it," she says quietly. "But you can't keep wallowing in self-pity."
Her words hit you like a slap in the face, the sting of truth cutting through the haze of your emotions. "Easy for you to say," you shoot back, your tone sharper than intended. "You're the one who's always the center of attention, while the rest of us are left picking up the pieces."
Ellie's brows furrow in surprise at your outburst, her expression shifting from concern to frustration. "I'm just trying to help," she retorts, her voice tinged with annoyance. "But if you'd rather stew in your own misery, be my guest."
The words hang heavy in the air between you, tension crackling like lightning. You both know that this argument runs deeper than just tonight's events; it's the culmination of years of pent-up frustration and unspoken resentment.
"I don't need your help," you seethe, the bitterness in your voice palpable. "I've been fine on my own this whole time. I don't need you or anyone else telling me what to do."
Ellie's features harden, the hurt flashing in her eyes like a spark igniting a fire. "Fine," she snaps back, her voice sharp with anger. "If that's how you want it, then maybe you're right. Maybe you don't need me at all."
The words hit you like a dagger to the heart, the realization of what you've said sinking in like a heavy weight. But before you can apologize, Ellie turns on her heel and storms away, leaving you standing alone in the midst of the chaos. You can feel eyes on you, a few townspeople whispering to each other. You fold in on yourself, slouching your shoulders and hands death-gripping your glass. 
And as the echoes of the argument fade into the distance, you're left with nothing but the bitter taste of regret, knowing that you've let your anger drive away the one person who's always been there for you, the night before you’re both assigned to be on patrol together.
⭒⭒⭒⭒
The two of you sleep beside each other comfortably in the ruined building, not a care in the world, at least for the moment. It's a few hours later when you blink away the sleep, eyes adjusting to the darkness of the room. You find yourself stirring awake in the early hours of the morning. Your body is stiff from sitting so still all night, and you can feel the effects of the injury on your side.
You can feel Ellie sleeping next to you, warm and cozy. She's got her arm wrapped around you, her head nuzzled against your shoulder. Silently, you scold yourself for falling asleep. You see the light of the early morning beginning to shine through the broken window of the building and feel a strange comfort in knowing that the two of you are in safety together with the sun slowly peering in.
As you carefully unwrap yourself from Ellie, you make sure not to wake her. You silently exit the room and find a closet down the hall. It's picked through – crumbs from the last residents. A half empty bottle of gin sits on one of the shelves, practically calling your name. "Eh, it's 5 o'clock somewhere," you joke to yourself. 
The sound of a door opening quickly penetrates Ellie's consciousness. She stirs away and sits up in the darkness of the room, her eyes still closed. Her head is pounding. She can feel the exhaustion and pain coming back now.
Her voice is still soft and sleepy when she glances towards the door. "Hello?" she whispers quietly. She can hear you rummaging around in the hallway.
You turn around, not expecting Ellie to be in the doorway. "I’m sorry, I didn't mean to wake you," you defend, holding up the alcohol. "I found a friend." Ellie rubs her eyes, still trying to wake up.
"It's okay," she says. She's resting herself against the frame of the door, the headache coming back in all its glory. "A friend, huh?" She lets out a small, weary chuckle. "Do you mind sharing?" 
You let out a long exhale, still a little drowsy and nod your head. "What time is it? I'm pretty tired still, to be honest." Ellie looks over at you, and you can see she's still half-asleep.
"No clue, almost dawn maybe?" you say, sitting down on a beat up mattress that is pushed against a couch, a large cut in the faux leather cushion exposing the filling. She wobbles over to you and not so gracefully joins you. "Here you go, m’lady," you joke, handing her the bottle of gin. Ellie smiles, snatches the alcohol and takes a small sip.
"I don't think dawn is the right time to be drinking," she says jokingly, before taking another sip. She lets out a long sigh, the alcohol slowly relaxing her muscles and numbing the sharp pains in her head. "That's a lot better," she says softly. She glances at you, trying to hold it together. She knows she's being weak and pathetic, but the exhaustion is getting to her. "I'm so, so tired."
"You don't have to stay awake with me, I'm a big girl. I can drink by myself." Ellie lets out a quick laugh and takes another sip of the alcohol.
"Well, I am thirsty," she teases, smiling.
She glances at you and smiles again, but you can also see the exhaustion setting in. Her eyes are slowly closing, and the room is beginning to spin. Ellie yawns, but manages to stay awake.
"Up to you, princess," you jest, letting your hair down. You take the bottle from her and take a sip, letting the liquid numb the pain. "If you're up to it, we can play a game to pass some time?"
"Oh, a game huh?" Ellie's eyes are half-closed now. She's trying to fight it, but she can feel herself relaxing. “I'm up for it," she says despite a yawn escaping her. You shake your head and roll your eyes, typical. "What kind of game we talking?" She gives you a little wink. 
"Hmm, how about never have I ever?" you ask, taking another sip, frowning when you realize how little alcohol there is left in the bottle. Ellie's eyes sparkle as she lets out a small laugh.
"Really?” she quips, raising her eyebrows as if to say are we thirteen? “Haven't played that in a while," she says, but smiles at you and shrugs. She takes a moment to gather her thoughts and then looks back at you. "Okay, let's play."
You move your body so you’re sitting across from one another on the mattress, bottle of gin in between. "Ok, never have I ever…," you trail off, thinking. "Gone skinny dipping." Ellie's eyes widen when you say this, and she lets out a loud laugh.
"Oh, I definitely have," Ellie replies, almost instantly. "I was, like, sixteen," she says. "Me and my buddies just decided to go for a swim in the lake at night." She takes another sip of the gin and looks you in the eye, smiling curiously.
"My turn, now," she says, trying to change the subject. "Never have I ever ... uh, eaten an entire jar of peanut butter in one sitting."
"Oh, c'mon." You take the bottle and take a swig, practically downing the remaining liquid. "I told you that in confidence,” you sigh, shaking your head. "Ok.. never have I ever.. kissed someone I shouldn't have." As you take a sip of the alcohol, Ellie once again raises an eyebrow at you.
"Someone you shouldn't have, huh?" she asks with a grin. She's not the one to judge, that's for sure. "Can't say I have," she replies with a small smirk. "So, you've got a juicy story behind that, eh?"
"Not really, it's kind of pathetic really. I'm surprised Jesse hasn't told you." you snicker, tucking a piece of hair behind your ear. "I had a crush on him when I was younger, before he and Dina got together, but I knew she liked him. Someone dared me to kiss him – so I did,” you continue, feeling heat rise to your cheeks. “Needless to say, he did not feel the same way." Ellie chuckles quietly as you let out a groan of disappointment.
"Sounds like you were younger and more foolish, if I'm being honest," she teases. "Which... I mean, I really don't think I can talk – I'm not the smartest person, or the wisest." Ellie is not planning on drinking much more, but she's finding the pain in her head a little more bearable now.
"Okay, my turn," she says, and she's already got a good idea of what she wants to ask.
"What's your question?"
"Never have I ever ..." Ellie pauses and glances at you, but you can tell the alcohol has made her a little more bold. "Never have I ever ... uh, slept with a girl before."
You take the bottle from her and finish the dingy bottle of gin, letting her stare at your lips. "Just because we haven’t slept together doesn't mean I haven't had some fun before," you say slyly. Ellie doesn't look away, she just keeps looking at your lips and your face. Something about you just makes her smile, and the alcohol isn't helping.
"Well. What about you? Have you ever slept with a girl before?" You ask, voice jumping down to a whisper. You’re suddenly a lot closer to her than you realize. Ellie doesn't say anything, but you can tell the question makes her flustered even more. She takes a moment to think as she glances towards your lips yet again.
"Yes," she replies quietly, finally. "I have." She looks at you again, but this time, she doesn't look away. She's staring at your eyes, and her face is still a warm shade of pink.
"Really? Was it good?" you ask, voice low. 
"Good?" Ellie replies quietly. “Hmm, you’d like to know wouldn’t you?” she pesters, eyes dropping down back towards your lips.
"Yeah," you reply quietly. "I would." 
"Keep it up and I might just have to kiss you," she says just above a whisper, dangerously close. You’re staring into her eyes, the weight of the world fading away.
Your lips meet in a gentle, tentative kiss, the taste of gin lingering on her tongue. It's a moment filled with a mix of nervousness and desire, a forbidden sweetness that neither of you can resist. As your lips part, Ellie's heart races, her mind buzzing with a million thoughts and emotions.
But then reality crashes down upon her like a wave. Ellie pulls back abruptly, her eyes widening with shock and regret. "I'm sorry," she breathes, her voice barely above a whisper. "I shouldn't have—"
But before she can finish her sentence, you silence her with another kiss, this one more urgent, more passionate. Your hands cup her face gently, your fingers tracing the curve of her jawline as you deepen the kiss.
For a moment, time seems to stand still as you lose yourselves in each other, the world around you two fading into the background. But eventually, you break apart again, breaths coming in ragged gasps as you stare into each other's eyes.
"I'm not sorry," you murmur, your voice filled with a mixture of longing and defiance. "I've been thinking about kissing you since Jackson."
Ellie's heart skips a beat at your words, her chest tightening with emotion. "Me too," she admits, her voice barely more than a whisper.
And in that moment, as you sit there in the dim light of the abandoned building, your hands intertwined and hearts racing, both knowing that nothing will ever be the same again. You may have started as just friends, but now you’ve crossed a line that can never be uncrossed. But for now, you push aside the doubts and fears, allowing yourselves to simply be in each other's arms, cherishing this stolen moment of intimacy and connection. 
Plus, you thought, you’ve been dying to know how soft her lips were. 
“God…” you mumble against her lips. “You taste so..." you begin but are unable to finish as she swallows the rest of your sentence, a flush spreading across your cheeks. And then you’re pulling your face away again, pushing her against the front of the couch and moving to straddle her. Her arms go to hold your waist, a shit-eating grin plastered on her face. You’re taking in the way her hair frames her face and bunches in the back, the strong muscle of her stomach peaking out from under her thin top. 
You can feel her gaze burning into you. "Oh really?" she asks, her voice filled with amusement. She seems to see right through you and it’s almost too much to bear, your body seemingly trembling with lust.
“If you keep looking at me like that, I won’t be able to stop myself,” you manage to breathe. 
Ellie laughs softly, "Maybe I don't want you to stop yourself.” She is practically devouring you with her eyes and you can’t stand it. 
Ellie moves in closer, pushing her knees up slightly and placing a supportive hand on your ass and the other on the small of your back. She smiles softly, "I mean, that is the idea after all," she murmurs against your neck, feeling confident as she slowly makes her way back up.
You weren’t that close of friends anyways.
Your hands are cupping her cheeks, fingers brushing against the freckles that dance across her face. You place a tentative finger on her lower lip, opening her mouth immediately to encase your thumb. She is staring at you from beneath her lashes and you can feel your thighs tighten at this. 
The hand on your ass moves to your thigh, inching closer and closer to where you ached for her touch. Your breath hitched, Ellie smirking with a finger still in her mouth, tongue lapping at the skin. Despite being situated below you, she was in control. With no hesitation, she slid her cool fingers underneath the hem of your shirt. 
Sensing her want, your hands grabbed the edge of your top and pulled it over your head. Ellie noticed how your skin was soft, warm to the touch. An oval gold locket rests between your breasts, ain't it warming you, the world going up in flames? The sheer material covering your chest left little to the imagination, Ellie practically drooling at the sight; no going back now. Unable to keep her eyes off of you, her nimble fingers trace your lower stomach, drawing out a soft whimper from deep inside your abdomen. 
Her fingers graze the skin under your breasts, breath hitching. She bites your fingers softly, which are caressing her face. The action has you involuntarily bucking your hips against hers, egging her on further. You are torn between wanting to run and giving yourself over fully. 
Ellie’s eyes sparkle with sick laughter as she suddenly is picking up the weight of your body to push you down into the mattress and position herself above you, her legs trapped between yours. Her strength and confidence are both evident in the way she holds herself. You can't help but feel a bit of guilt when you stare at her, her body so close and yet so far. She takes in the sight of you below her, the way your hair is spread out beneath you. 
You want to let go, to let all of your inhibitions go as she pulls you deeper and deeper into the heat of the moment. She pauses for a moment as she stares straight at you with those bright green eyes, her expression unreadable. You wish she would press her chest against yours, a hot and hungry mix of skin and sinew. 
You shudder again as her fingers continue their gentle trail, this time trailing downwards from your abdomen. You feel your cheeks heat as a shiver runs through you at the subtle change in her touch. She continues to trace her fingers across the curves of your stomach, her touch still light but teasing. Her fingers come to a halt again just below your stomach, and you feel the familiar tug in your abdomen.
She lowers her head as her weight is supported by her right forearm, which is resting above your head, while your hands get lost in her hair. Her lips leave soft kisses along your neck and down to just above your breasts, her left hand palming your exposed side, fingers dangerously close to your pants. 
She bites your skin, tongue soothing it afterwards. Your hands instinctively tug at her brunette locks, forcing a moan out of the woman above you. She is marking your chest, left hand snaking under your back to find the clasp.
“This ok?” she mumbles, words slurring against the heat of your skin as she is kissing up your neck. You nod eagerly, but Ellie isn’t satisfied. “Use your words, princess.”
“Yes,” you croak out, one of your hands leaving the now tangled mess of her hair to run down the front of her. You help her out of her shirt, pulling her back down by her belt loops, an action that has Ellie soaked. 
You’re smiling as you catch her lips in a passionate kiss, both hands fumbling with the button on her jeans. She’s laughing at your keenness. You didn’t care, you just wanted her. You struggle to slide the tight jeans down her legs, getting increasingly frustrated as Ellie’s hands explore your back. “Fuck,” you complain, pulling away from her mouth, irritated at her stupidly attractive half-undressed thighs. 
She shakes her head at your foolishness, thoroughly enjoying how worked up you’re getting. She sits back so she’s sitting on her heels, pulling your own pants down agonizingly slowly, wanting to drink all of you in. 
She collects your fully discarded jeans and stands to finish taking hers off. A pair of boxers are fitted tightly against her thighs – because of course they are. She’s staring down at you, something animalistic taking over her eyes. You suddenly feel very exposed, dressed in only your undergarments. However, you hold her gaze, not wanting her to realize just how anxious you are. You lean forward on your elbows, chest fully exposed. Ellie’s eyes have become saucers, salivating at the shape of you. 
“Are you going to stand there staring or are you going to fuck me already?” You bite, opening your legs ever so slightly, her gaze dropping down to the space between your thighs. And that’s all it takes for Ellie to drop down to her knees, pull your body forward by your waist, and swing your legs over her shoulders. You’re a bit taken aback by the speed of her actions – I guess she has been with other women. She’s careful to avoid the injury on your side, peppering small kisses around the surrounding area.
She lowers her mouth to the fabric of your underwear, tongue running a stripe between you. You tremble at the gesture, shutting your eyes. 
“Look at me sweetheart,” Ellie says sweetly, voice laced with honey, to which you oblige. “So wet and warm for me, hmm?” She's praising, her voice against your heat sending you into a frenzy. 
Her tongue is back between your thighs and you're bucking your hips up to reach her face, not wanting a barrier between you two. With one hand supporting her weight, she uses the other to push the garment aside, burying her nose deep into you. Her hands are squeezing your hips, her thumbs no doubt leaving bruises. 
Her tongue moved in and out, in and out, in and out as you squeezed your thighs around her head. If you weren’t so pussy drunk, you’d be embarrassed by the sounds of her mouth against your clit. At one point she bit down on your inner thigh, hard. 
You’re squirming underneath her, the sight of her staring at your sopping cunt almost too much to bear. “Ellie,” you’re whimpering, hands back tangled in her hair. With her help, you shimmy out of your underwear, now completely bare. She’s sitting back again, just staring, your doe eyes looking back up at her. 
At this moment, Ellie is ravenous. She is desperately trying to show that she’s in charge, pushing down her word vomit to keep from truly expressing how she’s feeling. She peppers kisses up your legs, right hand teasing your cunt. Without warning, she slides her pointer and middle inside you, a soft gasp escaping your plump lips.
“C’mon,” she coos, free hand rubbing circles into your thigh encouragingly. “Take it for me, baby.” She slides in another long finger, stretching you out even farther. Your eyes water, the pain almost overtaking the pleasure. But then her mouth drops down again and the sight of her mouth against your pelvis almost sends you over the edge.
The sudden urge to kiss her becomes immense, your hands desperately pulling her face up. You can taste yourself on her, tongue invading her mouth. As she continues to pump her fingers, thumb rubbing vicious circles, you pathetically moan into her mouth. This gets her off even more. 
With a hand placed on the small of your back, she shifts your weight so you’re on top again, her back resting against the wall. With you straddling, you ride her fingers, her mouth latched onto your chest. As she guides your hips with one hand, yours goes to wrap around her neck, her hot breath against your throat. As you bounce against her hand, her teeth sink into the soft skin of your shoulders, eliciting a noise from you that could only be described as pitiful. 
“Lemme,” you breathe, your hands fumbling down her body. “Wanna feel you Ellie.” Her name rolling off your fucked out mouth has Ellie nauseous, her heart hammering against her chest. And so, your free hand plunges deep into her boxers, fingers immediately covered in slick. This time she's moaning into your mouth, speeding up her own actions. She shifts her position slightly to give you better access. Your tongues meet, teasing and delighting as the air fills with the scent of each other's breath.
As you ride out your orgasms, Ellie swears she’s been to heaven and back. Your breathing quickens as your bodies press together, swept up in an ocean of heat and desire. She locked eyes with you, searching for some secret, hidden meaning in your haunting gaze. Unencumbered by the expectations of the world, like shadows merging into one, you melted into each other, losing yourselves in the intoxicating embrace of your passion.
⭒⭒⭒⭒
The next morning breaks with a crisp chill in the air, the early light filtering through the foggy windows. As you stir from sleep, you're met with a mixture of emotions; a lingering warmth from the night before intertwined with a sense of unease.
Sitting up, you glance over at Ellie, who's already awake, her expression unreadable as she stares into the distance. There's a tension in the air, palpable and heavy, like a storm brewing on the horizon. Despite the woman being knuckles deep inside you, she can hardly meet your gaze, fidgeting with the straps on her backpack. 
"Morning," you say tentatively, hoping to break the silence that hangs between you. Ellie's response is terse, her gaze flicking briefly in your direction before returning to the task at hand – packing up with brisk efficiency. "Is everything okay?" you ask, unable to ignore the growing knot of anxiety in your stomach.
Ellie's jaw tightens, her hands pausing in their movements for the briefest of moments before resuming their task. "Fine," she replies curtly, her tone sharp. But you can tell it's anything but fine. The tension between you is like a live wire, crackling with unresolved emotion.
"Is this about last night?" you ask quietly, your voice steady despite the turmoil swirling within you. Ellie's shoulders stiffen, her movements becoming more abrupt as she avoids meeting your gaze. "There's nothing to talk about," she retorts, her voice sharp with defensiveness.
You shake your head, frustration bubbling to the surface. "That's not true, Ellie, and you know it," you say, your voice rising slightly with emotion. "We can't just pretend like nothing happened."
Ellie whirls around to face you, her eyes flashing with anger. "What do you want me to say?" she demands, her voice raw with emotion. "That it was a mistake? That I regret it?"
Her words hit you like a punch to the gut, the sting of rejection cutting deep. "No, Ellie, that's not what I want," you reply, your voice barely above a whisper. "I just want to understand what this means – for us, for our relationship." You place a hand on hers, which causes her to freeze. 
Ellie's expression softens, the mask of anger slipping away to reveal a vulnerability you hadn't seen before. "I don't know," she admits, her voice barely more than a whisper. "I've never been good at this kind of thing." And then Ellie pulls her hand away, her eyes flashing with a mix of frustration and fear. "I don't know if I can do this," she confesses, her voice trembling with emotion. "I'm not sure I'm ready for... this."
Your heart sinks at her words, the weight of disappointment settling heavy in your chest. You had hoped that last night had meant something, that it had brought you closer together. But now, faced with Ellie's uncertainty, you can't help but feel a sense of doubt creeping in.
"I understand," you say, forcing a note of acceptance into your voice, even as your heart aches.
taglist: @seraphicsentences @onlinelesbo @yumimak @elliewilliamsblunt
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blingblong55 · 1 year ago
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Masquerade -Call of Duty
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This is a collection of quotes from a radio show called 'Dangerously Yours' from Ep titled 'Masquerade'. (none of these quotes or ideas of how the story develops are mine.)
---- GN!Reader, enemy!Reader, enemy!COD character, enemies to lovers? ----
You are a spy for your country, you were sent to kill the target so you made him/her fall in love and you also fell into your own trap. Neither of you can be with the other for if you are, you'll both get killed. So, you tell him/her what your plans were and he/she tells you they knew all along. You are in denial of your feelings for him/her and in the end, you end up killing him/her. His/her last words were, 'I love you R/N." And as his/her people asked if he/she needed help, all they said was basically no, that they want you to find your own path in life and that with hope, someday, you would believe that they were truly in love with you which is very much true.
This next part is of the characters in COD that I think would be the ones playing Rudolph Estefan and you of course play Catherine. These quotes are taken from the comment section...and from what i listened to as I wrote them down
[Italic for the COD character]
----
(Vladimir Makarov)
“Look, [R/N], a shooting star! Did you wish?”
“Oh, I didn’t have time.”
“Then there is something you wish for.”
“Yes…”
“What did you wish?”
“I was wishing that… we were two other people. Two people who need not say goodbye.”
“Perhaps it can be that way.”
----
(Valeria Garza)
[Orange is a third character]
“Oh, I wish you wouldn’t go to see that woman/man tonight, [ma'am]-“
“how could I stay away? Elvear, for the first time in my life, I am completely, head-over-heels in love!”
“but countess Garza-“
“I know what you’re thinking, ‘I have a mission to perform and I have no right to fall in love', but… things don’t always work out the way we’d like to have them work out, hey Elvear?”
“oh, I don’t know what’s to come of all this, sir.”
“no, Elvear, neither do I. Neither do I, but perhaps we shall find out tonight.”
----
(Alejandro Vargas) "[R/N], I offer you the three things most dear to me, my heart, my country and my dreams."
"You are too generous."
"[R/N], you must listen to me. Since that first hour we met, I've been completely yours. There's never been anyone else for me, there never will."
"Oh please, please don't say anymore. There are worlds between us, worlds that can't be crossed with words."----
(Alex Keller)
"I'm going to tell you something [R/N], something that will put my life in your hands."
"your life..."
"It would mean my life were the news to get to certain circles yes."
"Then don't tell me, how do you know you can trust me?"
"I love you...and I believe you love me."
----
(John Price)
“you may as well take my heart, [R/N], it’s already full of you. You walked into it the day we met.”
“You’re a fool, John Price.”
“but isn’t any man who falls in love?”
----
(Simon 'Ghost' Riley)
"Do you know what you are to me? You are something to believe in again. You're a type of person that had ceased to exist for me. A fine honest woman/man."
----
(Rodolfo Parra)
“Oh, my darling, you’re such a child. take your foolish little dream in your heart and go, please go!”
“what is it, what’s wrong my dear?”
“you know nothing about me- you’ve known me only three weeks!”
“three weeks…? [R/N], I’ve known you all my life.”
“all your life.”
“it’s true! I’ve seen you in a thousand plays, and read you in as many books. when I’ve heard beautiful music I’ve thought, ‘[She’d/He'd] like that.’ I’ve looked at flowers and known that one day I’d give them to you-“
“Oh, stop, stop! you must listen to me. I am not that woman/man! Perhaps I was once, but I am not now! You see… you were wrong. you can’t trust me.”
----
(Logan Walker)
"I had Elvear look you up the day you arrived."
"And it...it didn't make any difference?"
"It didn't make any difference. You see, I trust you. You came here to betray me and to betray my country, that is your mission countess/count [R/N]. And yet I'm so sure of your love that I will trust you with my life and what is far more valuable the life of my country."
----
(John 'Soap' MacTavish)
“if I betray you…I betray myself. If I betray him, I betray my country. My country is very dear to me.”
“dearer than I?”
“no…no, not dearer than you.”
----
(John Price)
“You’re very clever, aren’t you? I can read you like a book now. You thought I was young, and easily swayed, that you could make me love you, and I would throw over my country—my duty for you—!”
“That's not the way to look at it, [R/N].”
“You weren’t so wise after all! Because you’ve lost you hear me?! Lost! You’ve guessed wrong in our little duel of wits! You forgot how close hate is to love!”
“You don’t know what you’re saying [R/N].”
“You never loved me—! You knew that I loved you, and you used that!”
“[R/N] stop talking like a child—we’re playing for countries now!”
“Yes we are, aren’t we!”
----
(Kyle 'Gaz' Garrick)
“This is a gun in my hand, Kyle…I’d advise you to be careful what you say.”
“Well, rather melodramatic, aren’t you? tell me, will I be the seventh notch on the gun or the eighth? haha. do you mind if I smoke?”
“…smoke?”
“I always smoke at the theatre. somehow it enhances the performance.”
“You can do anything you please, Kyle, but you have very little time to do it in.”
----
(Keegan P. Russ)
“…You mean you’re actually going to kill me...?”
“I mean just that.”
“Well…go ahead.”
“…I’ll do this my own way…Look…you already know my purpose in being here. Now you will either give me my information, or I will kill you. You have until 9 o’clock.”
“You won’t do it. You can’t pull the trigger. You can’t pull it because you love me. It takes a very brave and a very cold woman/man to do that [R/N], I don’t think you can…Isn’t that true? Isn’t that why you’re waiting…?”
“That's not true!”
----
(Simon 'Ghost' Riley)
“Or is it that you want to watch your victim? You want my heart to constrict with agony, my hands to shake! You want me to plead for my life so you can make a generous gesture and spare me…Sorry [R/N], I don’t seem to be in the mood for prayers tonight.”
“You don’t think I’ll do it? That's why you’re so brave…You don’t think I’ll do it…You wouldn’t be so brave otherwise…! You’re a coward at heart! You lied to me, you deceived me—“
“You lied to me…you deceived me!”
“You tried to deceive me.”
“I’m tired of listening to you!”
“You gave me your heart, you know. You’d like me to hand it back, whole again, but I won’t. You’ll live a long time yet, [R/N], an eternity without me. You will look into the faces of passers-by, hoping for something that will, for an instant, bring me back to you. You will find moonlit nights strangely empty because when you call my name through them there will be no answer. Always your heart will be aching for me and your mind will give you the doubtful consolation that you did a brave thing.”
“you dare to talk of bravery.”
“what else do we have to talk about, [R/N]? For me, there will never be another woman/man but you. But for my heart, there is another love that must come before you, my country.”
----
(König)
“you’re so still… your face is like ice. what are you thinking, [R/N]?”
“…what does anything you can say matter? You betrayed me with words. What good are words… when your heart is breaking? if I fail now, I should deserve to die. You tricked me into loving you.”
“Aren’t you forgetting that you came here for the same purpose?”
“I couldn’t have betrayed you, I tried to tell you- you said you already knew. I was as honest as I knew how to be.”
“Do you think I wanted to love you, knowing where you came from and what your mission was? Don’t you suppose that every hour we were together I was thinking, ‘[She’s/He's] just pretending’?”
“I wasn’t! I loved you!”
“and I loved you so much I let you pretend! Because you brought something to my days I couldn’t stand the thought of losing. Listen to your heart [R/N]. Feel it pounding.”
----
(All of the COD characters...for sure)
“Your time is up.”
“Then, my last words, I love you, [R/N].”
“You’re determined to die with a lie on your lips?!”
*gunshot*
“I…love you, [R/N]…”
“Oh, god.”
----
(All of the COD characters...for sure)
“Tell her/him the truth? Tell her the truth so that she/he will watch the stars through tears instead of following the one cold star that is her/his destiny? No, no, Elvear, let her/him think I never loved her/him. One day, she/he will follow a flag to the same fate as mine. We must…leave her/him the strength for that hour.”
A/N: Anyway...hope you liked it?
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bixxelated · 1 year ago
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20 questions for fic writers
was tagged by @marypsue, thanks for the prompt!
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
8 as of right now ;)
2. What’s your total word count?
132,629 on ao3
3. What fandoms do you write for?
uhh including WIPs right now im mostly writing for stranger things, which got the most fics in progress, but also legend of zelda (botw/totk specifically), jak and daxter, dangan ronpa (mainly dr1 and nvdr3)
4. Top 5 fics by kudos
all these acts of violence> little red carp> these shadows you left behind> im supposed to take care of you> wavelength
5. Do you respond to comments?
i am Physically Incapable of Shutting Up About My Creations
6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
hm well for completed ones id have to say 'i'm supposed to take care of you', but including planned wips i dont know whether 'all these shadows' or 'wavelength' has more angst. theres also an ndrv3 fic in the works thats pretty downer
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
i think Moonlight is pretty hopeful!
8. Do you get hate on fics?
nah, usually me and my writing keep to ourselves
9. Do you write smut?
yeah, once or twice
10. Do you write crossovers?
y'know i havent really dabbled much in crossovers!
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
nnooooot as far as im aware
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
nope! ive been meaning to translate some of them into spanish tho
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
i tried a couple of times but it fell apart pretty quickly. dont think ill be trying again
14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?
iiiii do not have one because i really dont care that much about ships tbh. at least theres nothing that immediately comes to mind
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will?
hmmm well. little red carp was a fun fic to write but i dont see myself getting interested in it again
16. What are your writing strengths?
people tell me im very good at character voices and personality! which i appreciate! im also good at visualizing my stories and writing action scenes!
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
planning! im always getting tripped up by how to get from point a to point b and i always get stuck with the details! its the worst!
but i cant exactly pants a story either bc im always thinking "oh what if i take the story THIS direction" and then i end up having to go back and rewrite a lot of sections
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language?
writing in spanish is veeery weird compared to writing in english. i cant get the grammar to cooperate with me as much, and it always makes me feel like a kindergartner trying to use words they just learned to cobble together their first story
i usually try not to bother translating for languages i don't know. or do some research first. mostly i rely on either not giving context or just writing what theyre really saying "in italics like this"
19. First fandom you wrote for?
uhhh. balto i think. as in the 1995 animated film balto. i was obsessed with that film
20. Favorite fic you’ve ever written?
i think wavelength! just because of how much fun i am having thinking of the dynamics and Plot Things that are going to happen. a lot of it is a mishmash of what-ifs? and things i thought were going to happen in stranger things itself but didnt
i tag @mysterygreentea @sakurablossomcreamlatte @alzheimersparrotroute and anyone else interested in doing this
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thepaperpanda · 2 years ago
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The Neverending Love || Jake Lockley x Reader
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Summary: a brief visit during one of the nights transforms your life
Rating: explicit! (+18) 
Warnings: unprotected sex, Khonshu being a dick & Sekhmet being a bitch (strange AU where Khonshu was romantically involved with Sekhmet) 🤭
Word count: ~6,3k
Pairing: Jake Lockley x fem!Reader, Khonshu & fem!Reader, Sekhmet & Jake Lockley, Sekhmet & fem!Reader, Khonshu & Sekhmet
Authors: Fenrir & Cass
A/N: green italics indicate Khonshu, blue italics indicate Sekhmet & orange italics illustrate Jake speaking Spanish. If you'd like another part, please let us know in the comment section below the fic, we'd love to hear your thoughts :)
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The loud banging on your door that night was the last thing you expected. This has ruined your plans for a peaceful night of sleep.
Groaning, you dragged yourself out of bed and walked to the door, only to be met by a battered man barely standing on his own feet. Another thing stood behind him was a massive figure with a bird skull for a head.
"I need your assistance, Sekhmet!" Figure yelled, slamming the staff to the ground. "Don't pretend you're not here! I recognize this tiny human as your avatar."
This was when your Goddess decided to enter the picture. Her sight wasn't anything out of the ordinary; you were used to seeing a large human-like figure with a lioness head. "What's the point of bothering us, Khonshu?" She growled, exposing her fangs as you cupped the man's cheek to examine it.
"He's been seriously injured. I can't let him go to the hospital or any medical facility, we need to keep our heads down," Khonshu responded by tilting his head. "Will you assist us? Or are you going to let this poor thing bleed to death right now in front of your door?"
"Do you not have your robes? You can heal him by yourself. There's no need to bother me or my avatar," the goddess frowned as she spoke.
Khonshu hit the floor of a staircase with his staff a few times, one hand on his hip. "Suits are for other people. This one didn't get any, so I can't keep him alive. Do you still have any questions before the man bleeds? Maybe a form to fill out? I require your assistance."
Sekhmet laughed sarcastically. "You always lacked even the most basic manners, Khonshu. This will never change," she said as she bowed her head and looked down at you. "Y/N, take him in."
Nodding, you took the man's arm and draped it over your shoulder to assist him in walking into your flat.
Jake could barely move his legs; he felt as if he had lost control of his body, but he managed to follow you inside, grunting with each step.
Khonshu nodded to the goddess as a thank you.
Goddess ignored it and disappeared, only to reappear inside with you.
You assisted the man in getting on the couch and immediately began to examine his body to determine what you were dealing with.
Jake couldn't help but grumble when you touched his belly.
"You poor thing," you said quietly, standing up to get your first aid kit.
"Who'd have guessed Khonshu would choose someone like this as his avatar?" Sekhmet muttered as he leaned over the couch to look at Jake.
You quickly returned to him and moved his shirt up to treat the wound first. "There is a reason for this. You don't pick avatars at random."
"He's my vengeance's fist," Khonshu said. "And he's a natural at it. What did you mean by that, little person?"
The lioness laughed loudly. "If this is how he looks after delivering your vengeance, you made a bad decision. You have to be desperate."
Khonshu yelled, "Apologize! Take a look at your avatar! I won't apologize to you!" She declared proudly, "Right now, your avatar's life is in my and her hands, so behave."
"PLEASE!" You yelled loudly, looking at both gods. "I want to help him and the two of you arguing over my head make it hard to concentrate.”
"She's right," Khonshu pointed his staff at you. "Smart, little worm."
Jake groaned when you started cleaning his wound.
"You are like a wind," Sekhmet said, sighing deeply. "The soon she is done, the sooner you leave." 
With that, the goddess was gone and you sighed deeply, finally being able to focus on man's injuries.
"Who is she?" Jake asked looking at Khonshu.
"She's the avatar, just like you are," the god replied.
"Hi there," you said with a smile. "Bad news, whatever happened, you got it really bad. Good news, you'll survive."
"Yeah, if you'll patch me up and not him," he pointed at the god, "Then I'm more than sure I'll survive, doll."
"Positive fella, I can see," you chuckled and took the bandage to finally wrap his stomach. After that you were a bit closer to cleaning the wound on his forehead. "Other injuries aren't too serious. You will be back on your feet in a few days."
Jake pressed his palm against your cheek, his calloused thumb rubbing the softness of your skin. "I appreciate it."
"You're welcome, but I'd appreciate it if you didn't get any blood on me," you smiled and gently pushed his hand away from your cheek. When you finished with his forehead, you stood up and went to the kitchen to get a wet towel to clean and wrap his knuckles.
"Where did you get such a beautiful friend, Khonshu?" Jake asked, his brow furrowed and he hissed slightly as he felt a sharp pain spread across his chest and stomach.
"Long story. We won't get into that right now. Maybe I'll tell you a bedtime story one day."
"She is just an avatar of an actual friend, human," Sekhmet said, leaning over Jake as she appeared in the room again. "You should be grateful for our assistance, you pathetic man." 
All you could do at this point was sigh deeply while gently washing Jake's hands.
"And I was certain that nothing would surprise me after speaking to a bird skull. Nonetheless, es curioso que aparezcas ahora,"  Jake retorted, a little harshly.
"Show some dignity, you pitiful, little thing. You ended up at our mercy because of him, and you dare to speak to me like that?" Goddess snarled.
Jake turned around to face you. "I hope your goddess is kinder to you. You deserve to be taken care of."
Khonshu poked Sekhmet in the ribs. "May we talk? Allow them to do their jobs."
"For now, only my avatar is doing any work, but fine, let's talk," she gave a nod.
You laughed when they both left the two of you alone. "She's nice to me. I have a feeling she isn't pleased with Khonshu's presence. If this is the state Khonshu has led you to, I should be more concerned about your well-being."
"Knowing his nature, I'd be surprised if he had other friends among gods. They all hate him, he's a misfit," Jake chuckled a little, a strong cough followed. "And this," he pointed to his body, "It was just an accident, that's on me, not him."
"He should look after you no matter what," you explained simply, putting away the towel that had been used to clean his palms. "You'll stay with me until I'm confident I can let you go."
"It's unnecessary? You've already helped, and believe me, I don't want to hear your goddess's whining."
"It wasn't a request, sweetie, it was a statement," you said, smiling. "You stay here until you're ready to leave."
He supported himself on his elbows. "Gracias."
Meanwhile, Khonshu and Sekhmet went to another room. "Is it really necessary for you to behave in this manner? In my direction?"
"You barge in, demanding my assistance and insulting my avatar. Do you expect me to submit to you?" Sekhmet inquired, crossing arms over her chest.
"I came here to seek assistance. You were the first to spout insults, as you always are."
"You should be grateful that I welcomed you here. Like others, I should condemn you and let your avatar die," she snarled.
"Is there anything I've ever done to you? No, I don't believe so. Besides, our avatars appear to like one another."
"Like," scoffed Sekhmet. "Y/N is overall a nice person, she works as a nurse and helps people, she's  fond of everyone."
"Jake doesn't, and it's unusual for him to be nice to anyone, so I can already say he detected goodness in her."
"Someone is rescuing his ass. The last thing he'd do was try to be mean. Particularly to my avatar," the goddess sighed. "I'm actually surprised you decided to come here."
"What else could I possibly do? He's far too valuable to me."
"So valuable that you let him get to this point. Do you still believe someone is attempting to resurrect Ammit? Is that why you're dragging this poor soul around?" Sekhmet inquired, intrigued.
"I don't think so, I'm certain this is what it is, and I'm at least trying to do something about it, to prevent many innocent people from dying. Of course, you and others have different opinions, I'm aware, but you're mistaken."
"You know I can have a different opinion but it doesn't depend on me, sadly."
Khonshu nodded, confirming he understood.
Meanwhile, you were fully done with taking care of Jake's injuries. "There. All done. You should try and sleep now to let your body rest."
As his hand caught yours, he nodded. "Muchas gracias."
Since his hand was so bruised, you squeezed it gently. "No problem. I will get you a blanket. If you will need anything, call me."
"You already helped me, I don't want to overuse your hospitality."
"I mean it," you said, covering him with a blanket. "It should keep you warm and cozy. If you feel unwell or something is happening, just call me. My door will be open, so I will definitely hear you."
"Sólo quería decirte que ni siquiera sé tu nombre," he protested.
"It's Y/N," you smiled. "Khonshu! I'm done with your friend. Check to make sure he does not try to escape."
Khonshu glanced at Sekhmet and thanked her. After making it to the living room, he decided to look at Jake on his own. There was no doubt that his avatar looked weak, bruised, and exhausted. "Lockley, next time, be careful. Only you have left for me."
Seeing you, Sekhmet said, "You should rest. I can tell you're tired." 
"I am going, I am going. Don't worry," you said, walking to your room.
Khonshu sat in the chair and crossed his legs. "Rest, Lockley. You're much needed. Gather your strength for what's ahead."
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Jake opened his eyes after some time. He looked at his watch and discovered it was only 5 am. In an attempt to find a bathroom, he reluctantly sat up and got up from the bed.
Despite the fact that you were still asleep in your bedroom, the doors were open just as you had promised. Usually, if someone walks around your flat, you'd wake up, but Jake's visit was so late that you really needed sleep.
Jake, noticing the open door, peered in and, seeing you sleeping, tugged on your sheets. He took a look around and decided to limp around the flat. He found the bathroom in the process.
In the end, you sat up and rubbed your eye, a tiny bit awoken. "Jake... Are you okay?"
He stopped by your door as he was returning from the bathroom. "Lo siento, bebé, I didn't mean to wake you up."
"It's fine. I don't have a good night's sleep. You shouldn't be walking like this," you said slowly.
"The patches you applied yesterday made me feel fine."
As you walked up to him, you sighed deeply. "I'm glad you do, but the wound on your stomach didn't look good. You should be very careful when moving."
His breath hitched a bit as he said, "I am. You should also return to bed to get some more rest."
"First, I will help you get to the couch, but I don't like you sleeping on it with an injury like that," you said grimly. "Maybe I'll put you in my bed."
"Don't bother yourself, por favor.”
"If you say so," you sighed, letting him lean on you. "Even so, I don't like that you sleep on the couch."
He remained silent as you brought him back to the living room and let him nestle on the couch.
"Do you need anything? Nothing hurts?"
"Just the stomach. Overall it's alright."
"Well, it wasn't the smallest wound..." You said as you walked slowly to the kitchen. After a short moment, you returned to him with a pill and a glass of water. "This should help you."
He accepted both and easily swallowed the pill, downing the glass of water immediately. "Gracias. I have no idea how I'll repay you. You're so kind."
You shrugged and explained, "The most gratifying reward would be not showing up here in such a state again. This is how I am. Guess it's coming from being a nurse."
"So you're a nurse? That explains your medical knowledge and the gentleness with which you treat others in need."
"Yeah, it does explain some things. Additionally, Sekhmet gives me more opportunities that are more like a curse... But they do help sometimes."
"Lo mismo con Khonshu."
"We both are cursed in some way," you joked before patting him on the shoulder. "Rest some more, Jake."
When you returned back to your bedroom, Jake slipped one hand under his head to feel more comfortable. The wound on his stomach didn't give him a second of rest so he rethought everything that had happened to him.
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In the morning, he overslept for the pain vanished sometime after the pill you administered to him.
You slept more than usual, thankfully it was your week off. The first thing you did after getting up was check on Jake, making sure he was fine. The man was fine and still asleep, so instead of disturbing him, you headed to the kitchen.
"Y/N, you've known me for a while, and you know how difficult it is for me to say that but I'm grateful for your assistance," it was Khonshu, peering into the kitchen.
You squeaked loudly and twitched in your place, almost dropping the bread you were holding in your hands. Being used to Sekhmet was one thing, you were not used at all to another Egyptian god hunting you. "Y-You are welcome, Khonshu, but please, don't scare me like that anymore."
He assured, "It wasn't my intention, little human. How did you and Sekhmet get along?"
"Apparently she was lurking around the hospital where I work. She picked me, for some strange reason," you explained. "Why are you bothering this man? He is not well.”
"He's strong and due to his personal issues, I can say he's easily manipulated, it's useful for my purposes."
"He is not mentally stable. I can feel diseases because of the abilities Sekhmet provides me with. His mind is like... One... But varying in three different ways," you shook your head. "What you are doing isn't fair."
"Vengeance is not always fair, my little human. Sometimes it requires a real sacrifice which Jake provides perfectly. The universe isn't a fair place."
"You truly think anyone will believe your silly accusations while your avatar is in such a poor state?” Sekhmet asked, appearing in the room.
"You again? I'm speaking with your avatar who at least knows how to be respectful."
"I am respectful when I have a reason to be respectful. Right now I would hit you so hard that your stupid skull would break," you growled. "You are using this man."
"And it started. Time to vanish for a while," and with that, Khonshu disappeared.
Shaking your head, you began to prepare breakfast and coffee for yourself and your patient. You felt angry and really wished you could do something. With a heavy sigh, you walked to the living room once everything was ready. You set the plates and cups on the coffee table. Then, you sat on the couch next to Jake and gently stroked his hair. "Hey. Time to wake up."
Reluctantly, with a loud gasp, he opened his eyes and looked directly at your face. "Buenos días."
"I didn't expect to have a guest in the middle of the night. I apologize for the simple breakfast."
"I apologize for bothering you."
You scolded him, drinking your coffee. "I'll smack you if I hear something like this again."
He nodded, sitting up. " ¿Dónde ha desaparecido? Nevermind, wonderful. I don't even know where he left me."
"In safe hands. Don't worry. Eat up, you need to regain your strength," you advised Jake to focus on the breakfast and he didn't ask any further questions.
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An entire two weeks have passed.
Jake was under your strict care and you nursed him back to life. You were troubled by his mental state, but there was nothing you could do about it. The most difficult part was that Sekhmet's worst dream happened, and you fell for Jake. 
"You're back to normal. No bruises, no more wounds, and no scars," you smiled and touched his stomach to make sure he was fine.
Nodding slowly, he looked down at your palm pressed against his abdomen; he was indeed afraid of scarring, but on the other hand, he already has a few so one more would not make any difference to him. "Would it be possible for me to repay your hospitality in some way?"
"I said the night you got here. The most appropriate repay would be not showing up all beaten up," you responded and decided to add a small joke, "And a date maybe."
A frown appeared on his face as Jake fixed his eyes on yours. "A date? With you?"
You blushed deeply, looking at him. Of course, he wouldn't want that. "Oh, it was just a joke," you waved your hand as you walked away. 
As soon as you disappeared into the kitchen, Sekhmet lean over Jake. "Don't even think about this human," she huffed angrily.
" ¿Qué tienes en mente? " He frowned, looking directly at the goddess.
She warned, "If you get any closer to her, Khonshu will need to find a new avatar."
"I have no fucking clue what you're talking about or what you're thinking."
"You must know what I mean, pathetic human. I can feel how you look at her and this disgusts me," Sekhmet growled softly.
"Your avatar is pretty, so what can I do? You could have chosen one that was uglier."
The goddess snarled, "Men. All the same. Touch her and I'll bite your head off."
"If she wants this, I can't stop her. I thought all the goddesses were slightly gentler, but you aren't superior to Khonshu," Jake grinned nastily and decided to join you in the kitchen.
"Is everything fine?” you asked, noticing him in the kitchen. "You don't feel well?"
"When would be a good time for us to meet up? Are you available next week?" Jake asked simply, looking over your shoulder at the dishes you were cleaning.
Blinking, you looked at him again, blushing. "Jake, I was just joking. There's no need to, you know..."
He spotted a small magnetic board on your fridge so he approached it, took a marker, and wrote his address down. "In case you change your mind one day, chiquita."
As you watched him, you were able to do nothing but nod.
His belongings were soon gathered and he left.
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Such an opportunity couldn't be missed. You wanted to see Jake, talk to him, or simply spend more time with him for some strange reason. Despite Sekhmet's growls and warnings, you packed your bag, wrote down the address, and headed there.
Jake was surprised when he heard an intercom ring - he was even more surprised when he heard your sweet tone. After opening the door for you, he proceeded to put on a simple t-shirt.
You walked up the stairs and along the narrow corridor.
”You are making a serious mistake, Y/N! Khonshu and his avatar should not be associated with us!” The goddess growled, trying her finest to turn you around.
You simply explained to her, knocking on Jake's flat door, "It's not happening. I am just a human. I have my needs too. Please ignore all the stupid arguments you gods have between yourselves right now. Now, leave me alone."
Jake opened the door, smiling mischievously. "Well, well, I didn't expect to see you here. What a pleasant surprise," he shifted aside, letting you inside his flat. "Forgive me, it's a wee bit messy."
As you stepped in, you waved your hand happily. "I couldn't say no since you invited me here. So, here I am!"
Your body was lustrated from bottom to top. You were so sexy that the only thing he could do was a smirk. "Drink?"
"I'd like some tea if it's not a problem. Would it be okay if I stayed maybe a few days? It's a bit of a ride for me to get here."
Jake informed with a sweet tone, "I will prepare the room for you and make you tea."
"Room? Shouldn't I sleep on the sofa, as I made you?”
"You're too precious to sleep on a simple couch," Jake replied before disappearing into the kitchen. "Make yourself at home!"
"Thank you for your kind words," you said as you sat down on the couch, putting your bag down.
Soon, he returned with a cup of tea.
After accepting the cup, you took a sip, humming happily. It was a delicious tea. "Missed me? And I hope Khonshu doesn't mind me being near you."
"Khonshu told me you'd come, but I didn't believe him."
"Surprise!" You giggled. "Sekhmet didn't want me to come here, but I wanted to have a bit of my own life."
"What did she tell you?"
"You make a colossal mistake! We shouldn't be associated with Khonshu! He will ruin your life!" You shouted, trying to mimic Sekhmet's voice. "Am I the only one who thinks that there was something between them in the past?”
"For fuck's sake, I already thought they were ex-couple who hated one another because of their breakup."
"Right! They act like this so much! Perhaps she doesn't want me near you..." You said slowly, tapping your cheek, "Because if we got together, possibly, they would be stuck together again.”
"Us together, huh? Suena perfecto. Khonshu wouldn't have anything against her, since she jumps on him all the time. Isn't she?"
You laughed loudly and nodded, shrugging. She is a woman and a big cat packed in one body, so I guess that makes her a deadly combination for men."
"And he is a man and... well, a dead bird, so I have no idea what to expect."
"I have no idea what to expect as well, but they are gods and we all know that they are always a bit messed up," you whispered.
Jake walked to the kitchen and returned with an ashtray and a bottle of cognac.
The two of you simply started talking while the two gods watched.
"Pathetic," Sekhmet scoffed, seeing how you giggled at Jake's words.
"Lovely. She is happy," Khonshu commented. "He's able to make her giggle like a little girl."
"I know what she feels in him. He is twisted. He will play with her and leave, breaking her heart," the goddess concluded.
"Apparently, he likes your avatar. As soon as he's happy, I'm happy as well, even though it's a struggle."
She scoffed once again deeply, annoyed by Khonshu's words. “Since when are you happy with your avatar? They are nothing more than sacks of meat for you. I don't care if they like each other, just as you didn't care all those centuries ago."
"Maybe you could finally shut up, huh?" Asked Khonshu in a mocking tone.
Hersing, she pointed right at him and asked, "Shut up about what? Did you forget your faults? How did you abandon me and my feelings?"
Khonshu turned his skull head away. "You were always grumpy. What did you expect? Always demanding, never giving anything of yourself."
"I was giving you a lot. You always demanded more than I could give you so don't put the blame on me," she muttered, crossing arms over her chest.
"You know I had some significant feelings for you. You were the one to always push me aside."
"This is simply a lie! You pushed me away!" She roared.
At this point, you were sitting on Jake's lap with your arms wrapped around his neck as the two of you listened to the gods. You couldn't believe anything you heard. "I don't think they are aware we hear them..." You whispered with a smile dancing on your lips.
Jake massaged your hips, smirking wryly. There is no way I can imagine Khonshu having an affair with Sekhmet. Is it even possible for someone like him to fall in love? I was told gods were above us and ordinary human feelings."
"Well it's difficult to believe, but most gods have their positive and negative sides," you hummed softly. Despite always being above all, they tend to fall for the simplest things."
"Hard not to agree with you, preciosa mía."
"Do you like me? Despite me being her avatar?" You asked shyly, getting more comfortable on his lap. "Or do you see me more as he sees her?"
"I like you and have liked you since the beginning."
Blinking surprised, you smiled softly and cupped his face to pull him into a gentle kiss.
He groaned in the kiss and his grasp on your hips tightened. "You taste so sweetly."
Once you pulled away, you giggled, "You taste like alcohol and cigarettes. I think we are giving them another reason to be angry, but I don't give a damn. Not in the slightest."
"We have known each other for less than a few weeks, and I already have you on my lap, clingy as a little kitten. I like it," said Jake, smirking.
"Maybe it's because we are avatars? They were together so now we feel it, in some strange way?" Humming, you moved your hand up his chest. "Or perhaps it's just because you're handsome and my type."
"¿Soy tu tipo? " He teased. "How come?"
"Oh, don't make me say that!" Whining, you blushed deeply, moving on his lap. "You are handsome and I love your voice."
"Is that everything, chiquita? "
"The way you speak..." You sighed dreamily.
"Is calling you some sweet nicknames turning you on, chica bonita? "
Feeling that your cheeks were burning, you covered your face and nodded. This was a bit too much and you tried to slip off his lap, but Jake didn't let you do so.
"Where do you think you're going, gatita? "
"Away. I'm burning like dry wood. It's stupid since I don't even know you that well, but I can't help myself," you sighed.
It might be true what you said before. They were close centuries ago, and because of that, we feel a common attraction," Jake's hand ran over your waist.
"Yes..." You nodded slowly, getting lost in his dark eyes. "But in the end, you know what?"
"¿Qué?"
As you said this quietly, you moved closer to him. "I have nothing against it. I just don't know how you feel about it."
Stroking the curves of your waist, he let out a deep hum. "Aún no lo sé."
With a soft smile, you cupped his cheek. "Let's maybe try then, cariño," you hummed before kissing him.
"Try what?" He kept on teasing you.
"First, you could try and stop being a tease," you giggled, tapping his nose playfully. "Can we be together? Because I really want you, if I may be honest."
"You're so quick to jump to being bold about things."
As you kissed his jawline, you moved on to his neck soon after. "Oh, please. Is that so bad? Please, Jake, please. I need you..."
"Oh, mi pequeña, you need me? Need me in what sense?"
Smiling, you turned on his lap to finally straddle him properly. Using a quiet hum, you moved your palms down his chest and soon under his shirt. "I need you to fuck me, I want you to fuck me hard. I want everyone to know that you fuck me and that you are doing a fucking good job."
When Khonshu heard you say the things you did, he looked at Sekhmet. “I think your avatar is very bold regarding her needs. Cute. If they ever end up together, their babies will be very beautiful."
Jake smiled at you and stroked your cheek with his thumb. "Mírate a ti mismo. Such a pretty girl, such a filthy mouth."
"Please..." You whimpered and turned your head to wrap your soft lips around his thumb, sucking it.
"She will be heartbroken just like I was," the goddess groaned and vanished, tired of the show she was witnessing.
"Maybe she will be the happy one. I already can tell Jake is into her," Khonshu replied before vanishing as well.
Jake observed you carefully. “Eres una perrita mala, Y/N."
"Maybe..." You replied, letting go of his thumb. "I just feel the urge to have you, to fuck you, to be close with you, as close as possible."
"You barely know me," he teasingly said, pulling you off his lap so he could get up. As he did, he took his t-shirt off and tossed it on the floor.
"Despite that, you undressed for me and kissed me," you teased him back, copying his moves while removing your own shirt.
"Did I let you do that?" He asked, his eyebrows cocked.
"I barely know you. "You think I'll wait or listen to your orders?" You asked, raising an eyebrow with a cocky smile.
"If you want to have your tiny pussy fucked, I'd suggest you obey or act like a real slut I know you're hiding beneath the facade of reticence."
"I will be a good girl," you promised with a cocky smirk still on your lips.
He cupped your boobs and gave them a solid squeeze. "I like them. Take your fucking bra off."
As you let out a gasp, you slowly unclasped your bra in preparation for throwing it aside.
"Take your jeans off."
Obeying once again, you got up from the couch and slowly removed your pants, making sure to proudly show off your curves.
"Good girl. Now, tell me what you would like me to do. Leave the panties on, linda."
As you leaned over the couch, you showed off your round ass. "I'd like you to fuck me hard until I can't whimper your name anymore. Oh, Jake!" You moaned his name.
During Jake's tug-of-war with his jeans, you could hear a buckle being undone and some fabric shifting. Soon, his palm palmed your buttock, lightly slapping it.
Gasping loudly in surprise, you looked over your shoulder. "So this is how you like it?" You asked, shaking your butt.
"Shut your sweet mouth, gatita," he spanked you harder and soon grabbed your hair, pulling on it.
"Fuck," you whimpered, biting your lip to prevent yourself from making another remark.
"Who had been a naughty, little nurse, huh?"
As much as it was possible for you, you nodded, looking at him as much as you could. "I was a very naughty, little nurse."
In the process of massaging your ass, Jake finally slipped his hand between your thighs and rubbed viciously the damp stain on your panties before catching them to push the fabric aside. Suddenly, Jake pushed himself into you with full force. But fuck, you were so wet that there’s no resistance, his cock slipping through your soaked cunt all the way down to the hilt with such ease it nearly pulled him to his orgasm simultaneously. It’s apparently all he needed for the final tether of his resolve to snap because he’s slamming into you with such force that the entire couch rocked along the thrusts.
You let out a loud moan, then you exhaled a heavy gasp at the feeling of his cock spreading you. It was a long time since you fucked with anyone, and how you missed it! Trying to steady yourself somehow, you grabbed onto the couch.
Jake rocked in and out of you at a brutal pace that had your thighs trembling already. The hands on your hip bones were pulling you back onto his cock to meet each thrust, somehow pushing him even deeper against something utterly devastating inside you.
Whimpering his name, you grabbed hold of the couch and moved your hips to meet his thrusts. Your bending over the couch made it even better, making you feel his every move. "Fuck, Jake!"
Then he was pressing his forehead to your shoulder blade, back arched over you, and his curls tickling the curve of your neck. He found a different angle at which to hit that blinding spot inside you. His lips were pressing against your skin in gentle kisses underneath your ear. It felt feather light in comparison to the harsh grind of his hips against your own.
You reached out to touch him, simply wanting more of him. The way he pounded into you and hit all the right spots made you see stars. Soon, your walls started to tighten around his cock as you neared your climax.
Suddenly, Jake pulled out of you, knelt on the couch, and attacked your exposed sex with his mouth; the urge to taste you was unbearable.
"What the... Fuck!” You moaned the last part loudly, grasping the couch to steady yourself.
He kept on eating you out, humming from time to time, massaging your ass. "What? Did you think I'd skip tasting that cunt of yours?"
Humming, you looked down at him as you said, "I hoped you wouldn't, but I hoped I could cum around that thick cock of yours. Could we move to a different spot because my legs won't hold me any longer?"
He pulled back and grabbed your hips, pulling you to himself, waiting politely for you to take a more comfortable position.
You sighed deeply as he pulled you away from the couch. As much as you loved him fucking you, this wasn't the most comfortable position. "Time for me to have some fun. Sit on the couch, sweetie."
With an eye-roll, he followed your instruction and sat on the couch.
"Don't roll your eyes, love. Because I can finish myself any time," you said, falling on his lap, clutching his member. Your palm started to gently stroke the thick shaft.
Lockley bit his lower lip to muffle a moan that was about to escape his lips.
"You like it, don't ya? I bet you like it when I play with your tip," you whispered, using your thumb to tease him.
"Stop fucking teasing," he rolled his head back, grunting, his palms grasped your hips strongly.
Of course, you didn't stop. Instead, your other palm moved to his balls. You worked on his cock while massaging his balls. "Make me, baby."
He whined loudly, the sound he made was almost animalistic.
At the sound he just made, you chuckled and sank down onto his shaft. The sweet feeling of him filling you up again made you moan.
One hand was placed on your waist, while the other cupped your buttock and squeezed it slightly.
"So good. Fuck!" You gasped, moving up and down, rolling your hips from time to time. Your hands rested on his shoulders.
"¡Dios mío, eres tan sexy!" Jake gasped and pulled you tighter to his groin to buck his hips into you at a rough pace.
Moaning his name over and over again, you soon reached your climax, cumming around him.
You kept getting fucked until he finally pushed you off, got up, jerked himself several times, and shot his thick cum at your boobs.
Using your finger, you scooped some of his cum and hummed loudly as you put it into your mouth, whispering, "We have a tits lover here."
He leaned down and kissed you, tasting himself on your tongue.
You purred into the kiss, kissing him back. Once he pulled away, you smiled at him sweetly. "I liked it and I want more... In the future."
"Ya wanna stay here?" He asked casually, grabbing his jeans and putting them back on.
Watching him you blinked, surprised by his sudden offer. "Stay? You mean like permanently?"
Rather temporary, just so we can get to know each other first?"
You nodded, laughing softly. "I will gladly. I planned to stay a few days anyway, remember? Or did blew it outta your mind?"
"There will be plenty of nights to fuck things from me.”
"Oh, I bet," you nodded once again and sighed deeply. "Khonshu and Sekhmet will be pissed as fuck."
"You think?"
Suddenly, Khonshu appeared right next to you. "As far as I can tell, the intercourse turned out well and you were happy with how he treated you."
Just as suddenly as Khonshu, Sekhmet appeared as well, but right in front of Jake. Snarling, she said, "Dare to break my avatar's heart and I will snap your neck like a twig."
Jake looked directly at the goddess. "I'm sure you heard her singing for me, dear. We're adults and you gods don't understand something as basic as love, so don't try to stir the shit. ¿Tengo razón?"
Goddess poked Jake's chest, then turned to you, saying, "You don't know what love is. Not with Khonshu by your side. And you better be careful."
Jake reached for your jeans and offered them to you, wrapping a protective arm around you. “We'll soon fuck the shit out of them."
Humming, you nuzzled him, nodding a little. "The only thing that matters to me is being with you, regardless of what they both say."
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edsloveydove · 2 years ago
Text
I Have Always Seen You
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pairing: eddie munson x chubby female reader
summary: of course the boy i've known since 3rd grade, the one i've loved since 7th grade, would be the one to break my heart. i never thought he would be the one to fix it too...
warnings: bullying, fatphobia, use of the word pig towards reader once, falling off a bike, blood and cut knee from falling off said bike, self-doubt and sort of self-hate i guess, cursing, mentality that reader wouldn't be 'missed' (idk if thats a warning but just in case), no use of y/n, underage drinking, reader has an older brother for sake of the story (i gave him a really basic/common name), thoughts and flashbacks are in italics!! nickanames/pet names (shortcake, princess, honey, sweetheart), reader is at least a bit shorter than eddie, very poorly edited, talks of the demobats and upside down, again like very badly edited, lemme know if i missed anything, i'm sure i have!
word count: 9k+
notes: my first fic guys and it turned into this 9,000 word monster! wild! anyway, this might be trash i honestly don't know, i have no perception of it, pls let me know what you think!! also, this story is told in first person point of view so it uses 'i, me, myself' and all that, idk how i feel about it though tbh. uuuuh, enjoy!!
DON'T REPOST MY WRITING OR SHARE IT TO OTHER PLATFORMS (including mentioning it in tiktok comment sections and stuff like that pls) THIS IS MY WRITING, DON'T STEAL IT PLEASE!
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The sweltering midwestern heat was hitting Hawkins, Indiana early this year. School had only been out for a few weeks and it was already hot enough to have the city pool passing the max capacity damn near every day. 
Luckily for me, I had been able to successfully avoid going every time my friends have asked me to join them. Until now. 
“C’mon, it’s gonna be so much fun! Steve’s parents are gone again, like usual, so it’ll just be us and a few other friends!” Robin tries to convince me through the phone.  
“Robin, I never believe ‘just us and a few friends’, because it is ne-”
“It’s never just a few friends, I know. But this time it really will be just a few people. Like, actually just a few people. After everything that happened during spring break and all that, Steve really just wants the main guys there. There’s not gonna be any crazy partying, we’re gonna swim and relax, that’s it.”
“I don’t know, I might be busy tomorrow,” I attempt an excuse. 
“Then we’ll move it to when you’re free. We really want you there, you haven’t gone to any of our movie nights or other hangouts yet,” Robin points out while saying my name softly. “Is it something else? Is there someone you don’t want there?” 
Robin isn’t entirely wrong, there is something else that’s keeping me from joining my friends. And technically it does have to do with someone, but not in the way she thinks. And that someone happens to be none other than the Eddie Munson. 
I’ve known Eddie for many years. My older brother was one of his best friends while growing up having met in elementary school. James was in the grade above Eddie, and the one to introduce him to D&D, eventually passing on the title of Hellfire Club President to him as well. I was always in the background, hoping my brother would let me learn how to play just so I could impress him and his friends. 
While they were occupying the basement, getting pizza and bottles of Coke every other Saturday for their stupid role-playing game, I was in my room reading trashy romance novels and out riding my bike to the library in hopes to seem cool when I came back late at night. 
By the time I got to high school, it was James’ second to last year before he went off to college in Chicago on his big-shot football scholarship he managed to snag before he was even a senior. And yes, James was a Hellfire nerd and a star-athlete, so no one messed with their little club while he was there. Eddie was in his sophomore year, already antsy to graduate and move on to greater things. 
I was just the outcast that didn’t even have a group. It didn’t matter that I was the captain of the football team’s little sister, I never made any friends because I never tried to. 
Needless to say, yeah, Eddie and I had some history and maybe things got brought up when Vecna was trying to take over the world that might have been better left untouched. And maybe the idea of seeing him again brings butterflies to my stomach while also making my gut sink. 
“No, it's not that. I just…I guess I just haven’t been feeling it since…since yanno,” I say, half heartedly. 
Robin voices her understanding and tells me to just call back when I make a decision on if I would go or not. I promise her I will and hang up the phone. It’s not like I didn’t want to see them, because truly I did but it also wasn’t a complete lie when I told her I hadn’t been feeling quite right since the Venca situation. 
It was a really traumatic and horrible experience for everyone involved, and really astonishing that everyone made it out alive. 
‘Maybe I should just go…but what if it’s horrible? I know none of my lovely friends would ever say anything to me about it, but I just can’t stand the thought of them seeing me in a swimsuit, especially Eddie.’ I shake my head at the thought. ‘What a stupid thing to think, god, we all nearly died and I’m worried about my stomach in a swimsuit, how shallow is that? I guess some things just never change, no matter the life threatening situation…’
I go about my nighttime routine, washing my face and making sure no lights have been left on around the house. I say goodnight to my mother and fall right asleep. Or, I try to at least. 
But my mind keeps me up for much longer than I would have hoped. 
‘It would be a good time, though. Have a couple of beers, spend the night in one of Steve’s nice guest bedrooms. I wouldn’t even have to swim, I could just say I’m on my period or something. Ugh, but Robin knows that I always swam even on my period when we were younger. I’ll just wear a suit under my clothes and pretend the water is too cold even though it’s the peak of summer? Yeah, that should work. I can’t imagine anyone will care that much anyway if I’m not in the pool with them. I really do miss my friends.’
The next morning I call Robin and tell her I’ll be there tonight. She squeals in delight and tells me how happy she’ll be to see me.
Now it was just time to pick out an outfit, should be simple enough, right? 
Well, after leaving it to the last second and now only having about 15 minutes to get to Steve’s when it’s already a five minute drive, having half of my closet strewn about my room doesn’t seem like a very good place to be at. 
I finally sigh and opt for a swim suit from the summer before that I never wore, a green one piece with a wrapped sort of style for the top portion, and black cut off shorts and an old t-shirt that fits comfortably loose over it. 
I grab my keys and kiss my mother on the forehead, reminding her I wouldn’t be back till the next morning. 
Several shouts of my name reach my ears once I reach Steve’s backyard, it does bring a small smile to my face knowing I’ve been missed just as much as I’ve missed them. 
“You’re actually here, I’m so happy to see you!” Nancy says pulling me in for a hug, Robin joining on top, squishing us all together. 
“Yeah, yeah, I know it’s been a while. I’m sorry.” 
“No, you don’t have to be sorry, it’s been a really hard year,” Nancy says sincerely. 
Steve comes up for a hug next, squishing me for dear life, I could feel him about to try to lift me up and spin me around so I pull away rather abruptly. 
“Alright, alright, it’s nice to see you, too, Steve.”
He answers with a kiss to the cheek and makes me promise that I’ll come to the next hangout and every one after that. I see Jonathan and he waves with a small awkward smile. 
Finally my eyes meet Eddie’s. 
~
“James! James! C’mon, come outside and play with me!” It was nearing the end of summer before James would go back to school for his 8th grade year and I would be going into 6th grade. 
“Not right now, can’t you see that I’m busy? I’m too old to play outside anyway,” my brother rolls his eyes. 
I hop down the stairs so I can see the basement fully now. Spotting all of my brother's friends huddled around our dinky old card table while he has books and notepads sprawled on his end. 
“Well, can I at least play your game with you guys? I’m sure I can learn it fast!” I beam, faking confidence in hopes to sway them. 
“No offense, shortcake, but it’s probably too confusing for you. Besides, we’re right in the middle of a campaign, it would be too hard to add in another character out of the blue right now,” Eddie says with a chuckle, like the idea that I could play is too amusing to even consider. 
Naturally, I take full offense. 
“Fine! You’re all so annoying, I didn’t even want to play with you anyway. Especially not with someone who has a buzzcut!” I stick my tongue out at them and run away, but not before I can hear them laughing. 
Sitting alone in my room I know it was childish of me, especially for my age. James was probably right, he was too old to be outside playing tag with his sister. I was too old to be throwing a tantrum like this over some friends wanting to spend time with each other without one’s little sister hanging around. 
~
“Hey, Munson.” 
Eddie nods his head in greeting and goes back to talking with Jonathan. Well, that’s honestly about as much interaction as I expected to get from him tonight. 
“Alright, let’s get this party started!” Robin exclaims, dragging you toward the cooler filled with ice and drinks, I grab a Sprite to start with. 
2 hours later and my Sprite is still mostly untouched and it’s now gone lukewarm. The others are in the pool splashing and playing chicken, I sit on the side with my feet dangling into the shallow end, watching as they fool around and laugh. Giggles and quiet laughs leave my lips on occasion with them. 
“You should get in, the water’s really nice!” Nancy says. 
“Yeah! Strip for us and get in here,” Robin adds, making everyone laugh. 
“You guys just want to get me out of my clothes, don’t you?” I play it off, shaking my head slightly. Giggles erupt again. I excuse myself to the bathroom after pulling my legs out of the pool. 
Closing and locking the door behind me I look at myself in the mirror.
‘I should just get in the pool, shouldn’t I? I do feel like I’m missing out on what could be a lot of fun. And it wouldn’t hurt to wash all this sweat off of me. I could just keep my shirt on, I have an extra change of clothes as backup anyway.’ 
I finish my business and leave the bathroom. 
After turning the corner to go back to the pool I run straight into something firm, nearly being toppled over before hands are at my forearms to keep me from doing so. Seeing dark curls fanning across this “something’s” shoulders and several patches of dark ink on its bare skin, I immediately know I have just run head first into Eddie. Great. 
“Sorry, I wasn’t looking where I was going,” I murmur, keeping my eyes pointed down. 
“It’s alright, shortcake. No harm done right?” he says, adjusting his head to try to catch my eyes. 
I nod my head and pull away from his hands that still rest gently on my arms. 
“Hey, hey, what’s up? You’re so quiet tonight, is everything okay?” 
I nod again and pull away harder, rushing out the door to get back to the pool, ignoring his call of my name and a request to “just hold on a second.” 
Pulling my shorts off quickly, I step up to the pool and begin to wade into the water before Robin stops me. 
“Your shirt! You don’t want the chlorine to ruin it!” 
My heart thumps, thinking of how I can handle this. My mouth opens to say something but before I can, Robin cuts me off. 
“Just take it off, no one’s gonna make fun of you for being in your swimsuit and if they do I’ll beat them up for you and then we’ll all collectively agree to throw them out of the group. And don’t try to tell me that’s not what it is, I can see it all over your face. You’re allowed to have fun and go swimming, I don’t like to see you excluding yourself, no matter the reason,” she says. 
Of course she would see right through any lie I could throw her way. That’s just how Robin is. No matter how clumsy she can be, she really is observant. Not only that, but she’s right. Nobody cares and if they do, that’s their problem. 
I rip off my shirt and dive into the pool trying to minimize the time in which people could see me without it. Immediately finding Steve’s legs I yank his ankles so he falls backwards into the water with an unnecessarily loud screech. 
It makes the rest of us laugh loudly until Steve comes back up for air with a thirst for vengeance. He chases me around the pool, not for long considering he’s such a strong swimmer and I’m really not trying very hard to get away from him, and catches me easily. His arms wrap around my waist and I cringe as his hands nudge my stomach, scolding myself for the action right after. Steve doesn’t care about my stomach, if he did, he wouldn’t be my friend. 
“That really wasn’t very nice,” Steve says and starts lifting me out of the water. 
“Steve, hey. Steve! Steve, no, I’m too heavy! Stevie, no! Bad Stevie! Bad!”
I’m thrown in the air as far as he can get me and I splash back down. 
I come up spluttering for breath, “Oh, you are so dead, Harrington!” 
All at once the rest of us are splashing and dunking him over and over, until he pleads mercy. Shrieks and squeals of glee and what might be considered laughter fill the air as everyone gets their turn being thrown into the water. 
Eddie comes back out from the house and cannonballs in the middle of our ‘hate on Steve’ fest. 
Eventually I end up back on the side of the pool in my shirt with just my feet in, this time so I can enjoy a fresh soda and mellow out a little, not to make myself smaller. Nancy and Jonathan have called it a night already, leaving Steve, Eddie, and Robin in or by the pool with me. 
“I never noticed this scar? Where did you get it?” Robin points to my knee. 
The nice old librarian put a hand on my shoulder gently to get my attention, telling me the library would be closing soon and it was best I head home, I hadn’t realized how late it already was. I pack everything together as fast as I can, quickly saying goodnight and unlocking my bike, trying my hardest to race home before the sun sets. 
The wheels of my rickety bicycle pump faster and faster and in my haste I bump over a high curb without realizing, flying off and onto the pavement. 
Tears spring to my eyes as air is sucked in through my teeth. I take a look at my knee and see a small dribble of blood seeping down it, my hands have little scrapes all over, spotted with little beads of red. 
Not the worst I could have gotten from a bike incident, but bad enough to keep me from being able to ride the rest of the way home. It’s not far, but so much for getting back before the street lights turn on. 
About 15 minutes later I make it into our backyard, dropping the two wheeled contraption from hell into the grass and stumbling through the door, all while sniffling back sobs. 
“Oh hey, shortcake! James was starting to get worried about you, you really shouldn’t walk alone at night yanno? Next time ju-” Eddie cuts himself off after seeing the state I’m in. Of course he had to be the one to see me like this. Anyone else could have been sent on snack duty tonight, but it just had to be him. 
“Oh my god, what happened?” He walks up to me. 
I shrug my shoulders and look away. I catch a glimpse of how bad my knees and hands have gotten on the walk home. Blood drips down both knees, my left knee looking significantly worse than the right. Dirt and pebbles cover my palms along with streaks of crimson. 
“Don’t do that, sweetheart. Tell me what happened? Please?” 
I still don’t say anything, fresh, hot tears welling up and already spilling out. I refuse to let stupid Eddie Munson see me like this, all it would be is more leverage to make fun of me with. 
He pulls my hand gently until I’m sitting down. Eddie appears in front of me with a first aid kit a few seconds later, carefully cleaning the gashes on my knees and scrapes on my hands with alcohol wipes. 
“Did,” he lets out a shuddering breath, “Did someone hurt you?” 
“No, god no Eddie, I just-, god this is so embarrassing, I just fell off of my bike is all,” I mutter, not really wanting him to hear the words as they come out. 
“S’ not embarrassing, stuff like that happens. I just wish you would have told me, here I was thinking the boys and I were going to have to band together to cause hell for our favorite little goblin,” he says. 
“You’re just trying to make me feel better, you guys wouldn’t really do that, I guess James might. Most of you guys don’t even really like me that much anyway, you don’t have to lie,” I whisper.
“That’s not true! Of course we would stick up for you!” he says like he’s shocked that I would think the opposite. 
I just shrug my shoulders again and wipe my eyes, still avoiding looking him in the face. 
“Here, let me help you up to your room. That can’t feel good to walk on,” he pulls me up from the chair and goes to lift me into his arms. I jump out of his reach before he can. 
“It’s okay, I got it. Just- you better get back downstairs before they start worrying. I’ll take care of myself.” 
“What? No, you’re basically limping just standing here, shortcake, let me carry you, it’ll only take a minute?” He phrases it like a question. Asking but also sort of demanding. 
The idea is actually really nice, and I want to say yes to it. It would be like when the prince finally gets the princess in all those books I’ve read. Eddie could sweep me off of my feet and whisk me away. 
But I know better, I know that he wouldn’t be able to lift me. Even if he could he wouldn’t so much as glance at me, again, I’m just his friend's little sister. Here only because this is where she lives. 
“No thank you, I’m okay. Go ahead and go back to your game, I’m sure they miss you already. Nobody would even notice if I were gone, but they’ll practically riot without you,” I try to cover how deeply I believe those words with a laugh as I wobble away and halfway up the stairs before he can stop me. 
~
“Um, I guess I don’t really remember. It’s probably just one of those super old scars you forget are even there,” I say, even though I recall the night I got it vividly. 
Eddie’s eyes meet mine from the other side of the pool and they look almost…hurt at the possibility that I might not remember that day. Well, he didn’t get to feel hurt about it. He made it clear that he doesn’t care how I feel when we were in the upside down. 
“Hmmm, yeah, I have, like, tons of those actually,” Robin says, “This one is from my cat, Steven, and this one-” 
“You have a cat named Steven?” I cut her off. She gives me a look that says ‘duh’. 
“But what about Steve? Like human Steve? Was this before or after you became friends? And how has this never come up before?” I practically shriek. 
“Believe me, it has come up before. And yes, before she tells you otherwise, it was after we became friends,” Steve says, settling down beside me while throwing his arm around my shoulders. 
“That is not true! I found him outside the mall before we became friends! We may have been working together at that point, but we were not friends yet!” Robin shouts. 
“We were friends, she’s just embarrassed that she named her cat after me,” Steve whispers in my ear, making me giggle like a schoolgirl. 
Even though I’ve never seen Steve romantically, he still had the ability to reduce me to feet kicking and hair twirling. 
“What’s wrong with you, Munson?” Steve asks, noticing the scowl covering his face that usually carries a bright smile. 
Eddie shakes his head, “Nothing man, just thinking about how I don’t have a beer in my hand right now.” 
A call of my name breaks my gaze away from the mirror. 
“You almost ready? It’s time to go!” James yells, entering my room. “Hey! You look great! It almost feels like I’m sending you off to prom already,” he says wiping fake tears from his cheeks. 
I shove him in the chest and readjust my hair and the straps to my dress for what feels like the millionth time. It was a rather simple looking thing considering I had to sew it myself since the only dresses even near my size were too far out of theme for the 8th grade Winter Snowball or they were simply just ugly. 
Light blue and white fabric lays delicately across my shoulders and down to my knees, matched with white slip on shoes and silver snowflake jewelry. 
“You look really nice, seriously. I know how nervous you are, but it’s gonna be okay, I promise,” my brother assures me, slapping my shoulder much harder than necessary to push me towards the door, “Now it’s time to get your butt moving, let’s go!” 
When we arrive at the dance I immediately catch eyes with Robin and speed walk to her. James goes wherever he's needed for volunteering. 
After about 45 minutes the first slow song of the night comes on as I sit contently by myself at the far end of the bleachers. I wasn’t sad to not be dancing with anyone, I was honestly sort of relieved that I hadn’t had to dance all night. But watching all the couples on the dance floor does make my heart ache just a little. 
“I haven’t seen you dance all night, what’s that about?” 
“Why are you here?” 
“Ouch, shortcake, I don’t even get a hello? And what, I can’t come volunteer with your brother?” Eddie says, fake hurt painting his face. 
“It just doesn’t seem like you, I guess.” 
He sits down next to me leaving at least enough room for another person to sit between us. He hands me an unopened juice box. 
“Seriously though, why aren’t you out there? You don’t have someone you wanna get cozied up with on the dancefloor?” He wiggles his eyebrows at me in his typical annoying Eddie way. 
I roll my eyes, as my stomach twists with shame. He’s mocking me, isn’t he? 
“Nope. I’m okay with it though. Honestly I was perfectly happy just sitting here. Until you showed up that is,” I say with a shrug. 
“Oh really? Well, gosh, who made you such a sour fart?” he laughs as I push him in the arm. 
“Alright, c’mon then. Pity party is over, let's go do this,” Eddie holds out his hand and raises a brow when all I do is look at it confused. “Let’s go dance, shortcake, you should at least once before it’s over.” 
“Um- I-” I’m at a loss for words. There’s no way he’s being anything but friendly but my stupid heart skips too many beats to count. 
“Here, I need to go check on James and see how the other volunteers are doing. While I take care of that, I want you to sit here and decide if you want to dance with me or not. Of course, I won’t make you do anything you don’t wanna, but if you’re up for it, I’m here,” he says, bouncing back to the drinks and snacks table. I smile giddily at his back and stay sitting. 
By the time the last song of the night played I was still in the exact same spot I had been for nearly 2 hours, waiting for Eddie to come back. 
Immediately after he left, I knew I wanted to dance with him. Of course I would. I’ve known him since I was in 4th grade and have had a crush on him for a year now. All I had to do was wait a few minutes and I would get to live out a fairytale dream. Dancing across the room in a flowey dress with the guy I liked. Of course it would be strictly platonic on his end but it could mean something more to me silently. 
So there I sat, with my empty juice box, tapping my foot in excitement. The first slow song ended and there was no sign of Eddie, but I was sure he just caught up with volunteer work. After the next 3 songs played I began to doubt myself slightly. 
‘Maybe he hadn’t actually wanted to dance like it had seemed. But he looked really sincere when asking me. Yeah. And even if Eddie is just a regular teenage boy, and he can definitely be a jerk sometimes, he’s much sweeter and kinder than most. He wouldn’t leave me hanging like that. He’ll be back any minute now, I’m sure.’ 
By the time 11 more songs had played, I knew he wasn’t coming back. Tears were smearing my mascara while I sat as still as possible on the bleachers, not wanting to draw any attention to myself.  
Of course he wasn’t being serious. He just wanted to tease me like usual, the only difference was this time it went too far. This time he was cruel about it. He could have just told me he didn’t mean it. Instead he strung me along and had me sitting here like a lovesick puppy for an hour straight. 
Who was I kidding? Eddie couldn’t be interested in me. He was my brother's best friend and had seen me grow up. I was just his friend’s chubby little sister. Wearing a dress that doesn’t sparkle and shine like all the others’, sitting alone and pouting like a baby. 
He probably thought I would crush his feet if I accidentally stepped on them. 
After persevering through another hour of horror, James finds me in my corner ready to head home. 
“All ready to go?” he asks jovially like he always seems to be. 
“Yes.” 
James picks up on my mood right away, but I’m already halfway to the car before he can say anything. 
“Okay, uh, I gotta clean up some stuff still but here,” he throws me his car keys when I turn back around, “Go get the car started yeah?” 
I nod and head out to the car when I see Eddie jogging up to the doors after me. My steps speed up hoping for all hell to avoid him. He calls my name but I don’t look back or slow down, in fact, the only thing it succeeds in doing is making me walk faster. 
My hands shake as I try to slip the key into the driver’s side door handle. Warm hands settle on my wrists. 
“Holy shit, I am so sorry, shortcake. I was so excited to dance with you, I really was, I just got caught up in helping another volunteer with something and lost track of time. I didn’t mean to forget you there all alone, I swear on everything. I know how excited you were for tonight and I am so sorry. I didn’t realize how long I had been gone until everyone started leaving and then I saw you get up and realized what I’d done, please forgive me,” he rambles off almost too quickly to understand. 
I expect tears but all I get is a deep rooted feeling of shame and anger. Ashamed by the fact that I thought he would come back and angry at myself for sitting there hopelessly when I could’ve danced with Robin at least. 
“Please, look at me. Please tell me you at least got to dance with someone else, right? You had a good time? Please tell me you at least had fun,” he pleads. 
A scoff escapes me as I whirl on him. 
“No, I didn’t dance with someone else, I sat there and I waited for you. I waited for you the whole time, and I guess that was my first mistake wasn’t it, huh? I believed you. I really thought you meant what you said to me.” 
I rip my arms out of hold. 
“You know what’s funny, too? I was actually having a really good time before you showed up. I told you as much earlier, even. I was perfectly happy to sit by myself, considering that’s how I spend most of my time anyway. I was really enjoying just watching the lights and the twirl of dresses, alone. I was overjoyed to just sit and watch Robin dance with her friends. And you had to come and- and lie to me! You made me feel special for fuck’s sake.” 
His eyes flash with guilt and he must have finally realized how much he hurt me. 
“I get that I’m not the prettiest and skinniest girl and I know that most of those kids don’t even know my name, but you do! You know me. You know me and you still forgot about me,” I pause and take a deep breath, “Do you remember what I said that night when I fell off my bike?” 
Eddie shakes his head.
“Nobody would even notice if I were gone. Nobody, not even you, I guess. You forgot about me not even 5 minutes after making me feel like the most special girl in that whole damn room. And that was really mean, Eddie. I hope you, at least, have a good rest of your night,” I step into the car and start the engine.
Steve plops down next to me holding 4 cans of beer, one for each of us. 
“I’m really happy I came tonight, thank you, for inviting me and not forgetting about me after I kinda disappeared,” I say quietly. 
Steve pats my back while Robin says something along the lines of ‘duh, of course we would never forget about you.’ 
Eddie stays silent, watching me closely. 
I put my drink on the ground beside me and lay on my back, pulling my shirt down to make sure it covers me still. I start to count the stars, just to keep my brain occupied. My eyes drift shut, my mind choosing to visit yet another memory tonight.  
It was James’ graduation party. All we had were a couple tables set up with snacks in the backyard and a bonfire, nothing too fancy. I made a simple ‘Happy Graduation!’ banner to hang across the gate for everyone to see, too. 
I’m wearing a plain white sundress and converse, I knew I would be running back and forth from the backyard and the kitchen too much for heels to be sensible. Making sure there’s enough drinks and food and ice for everyone was my job tonight. The sun is still up, melting the ice and warming every drink out here. 
James calls my name softly, “You can quit running around and tending to every little need. Come hang out with everyone for a little bit. Please?” 
I set down the metal tub where drinks are kept and walk over to sit around the fire with him and his usual friends. New faces have popped up over the years, but many stayed the same. Danny Williams, a junior who may or may not have been my first kiss when we happened to both show up at the same party and ended up playing spin the bottle together, Jason Carver, a freshman who appeared promising on the football team before switching to basketball instead, Michael Brown, a senior who’s been in the little Hellfire Group since the beginning. There are several others I don’t recognize and even more that I do. 
Of course, Eddie is there too. I just haven’t really…acknowledged him in…in a really long time. 
I haven’t necessarily been giving him the silent treatment, but I stopped entertaining the conversations he always seemed to start with me. 
Danny greets me with a smile as he sits down next to me. He even pulls his lawn chair a little closer towards mine, grinning slightly while doing so. 
“What can I do for you Danny?” I say. 
“Oh nothing. I just wanted to come sit by you, is all.” Huh. That…that sort of stumps me. 
I didn’t think Danny would even recognize me at the party, and I’m honestly even more surprised that he wanted to talk to me after kissing me. We make small conversation, butting into the rest of the group's discussion once in a while to add an opinion. 
Night had fallen and marshmallows and graham crackers were brought out for s'mores, as well as a couple of 12 packs of beer that someone had brought with them. 
I knew James had gone to several parties to celebrate winning a football game where there had been alcohol, or even just little get-togethers where it was provided. I guess now that it was only soon-to-be seniors and high school graduates, minus myself, left at the party it was time for that portion of the night to begin. 
I stand up to go in and let the others have their fun. 
“Where’re you going?” Danny asks, grabbing my hand lightly, looking up with wide puppy dog eyes. His eyes are a pretty green color. Brown eyes have always been my favorite, though. 
“Oh, I was just going to head in and call it a night. That way you all could have your fun without worrying about me dragging you down.” 
My comment makes his brows furrow, his mouth opens to say something, but he’s cut off. 
“You can stay out here, you know. No one minds having you here and I’m sure dear old James doesn’t care if you partake in a little drink, do you?” Eddie states. When did he get so close to us? 
“Even if I did care she gets to do what she wants, man. As long as you're safe about it, go for it,” James says, patting my back and taking one for himself. 
I’ve never drank before, but what the hell? James was leaving in just a few weeks now and this might be my only chance to try it. It’s certainly one of my last chances to hang out with everyone like this, at least for a while. 
After just 2 cans my tongue had already loosened significantly. Danny and I had been talking and giggling the whole time until he had gotten up to go home since his designated driver was ready to leave. 
“So, you and Danny seem pretty close suddenly?” Eddie phrases it like a question, wanting more information on the subject. 
Usually I would just hum in what could be taken as agreement or disinterest but my mind was running a little slower than normal. 
“Yeah, he and I kinda ran into each other at a party that I kinda crashed with Robin and we ended up, like, kissing and stuff,” I giggled. “But shhhh, don’t tell anyone else.”  
Eddie’s eyes widened, but that could have been a trick of the light. 
“What, uh, what do you mean by ‘and stuff’?” 
“Oh nothing. We just had one teensy tiny kiss because we were playing spin the bottle,” I say, not really thinking about it. 
Now I really know my brain is playing tricks on me because for a second I think Eddie looks pleased with this new knowledge that it didn’t really mean anything. 
“I feel like we haven’t really talked in a long time. What’s, uh, what’s been up, lately?” 
The question itself is awkward, but the way he struggled through it made it even more awkward. 
“I’ve been regular old me, Eddie. Nothing new or exciting. Although I did finish a book last night that really threw me through a loop. Oh! Actually there is something exciting! Do you wanna hear it?” 
He smiles, “Of course I do, shortcake.” 
“Well,” I take another sip of what is now my third beer, “William Gillar and Stacy Johnson have finally graduated!” I let out a squeal. 
Eddie just looks at me confused. 
“Do you have any idea what this means, Eds? I am finally free of those two asshats for the rest of my high school experience! Isn’t that amazing! I mean, it was easier to ignore this year than last year, but god I am so thrilled! No more mean notes from them calling me a pig in my locker and book bag, I can even finally find a table to sit at for lunch instead of hiding in Mr. Steerwell’s class,” I sigh happily. 
“Do you wanna know what else they did? This is so silly! They used to catch me on my walk home from school and steal my library books. How stupid is that? Why would you steal someone’s library books, right? They would run around with it so I would chase after them and then laugh at how my body would jiggle. How funny, right? I am so happy they’re gone, Eds, you have no idea.” 
Eddie has his mouth halfway open, anger flaring in his eyes. But that couldn’t be right, why would he care about a couple of high school bullies. 
“No, that’s not funny or silly. That’s been going on this whole time? And you didn’t tell anyone? God, why wouldn’t you tell someone, sweetheart? That’s horrible,” he says. 
“Meh, it’s just normal high school bully stuff.” I wave my hand in dismissal. 
“No, it’s not. Bullying shouldn’t even be considered normal anyway, but what they did to you? That goes far beyond normal, shortcake. I wish you would have said something. You know James and I would’ve taken care of them for you, right?” 
“Well, it doesn’t really matter now, does it. It’s too late,” I dismiss him and his misplaced worry. Honestly, it was nothing I couldn’t handle. He must have sensed how much I didn’t want to talk about it anymore because he dropped it. 
The night moves quickly after that, people say their goodbyes as James takes over clean up duty, considering I can barely stand up without nearly falling asleep. 
“Eddie, will you take her in and make sure she gets into bed okay?” James asks. 
That’s how I find myself being semi-dragged up the stairs to my bedroom and thrown on the mattress like a sack of potatoes. I don’t think Eddie was half as rough as my brain made it seem, to be honest. 
“Eds?” I whisper looking down at Eddie who’s kneeling by feet, gently taking my shoes off. 
“Yeah?” 
A couple beats of silence pass where I try to figure out how to word what I’m thinking. 
“I forgive you.” His movements stop. “I hope you know that. It’s probably such a silly little thing to even remember but I forgive you for forgetting to dance with me. I probably would have forgotten me, too. And…and I am sorry. I really am, for pushing you away so hard after. It was really stupid of me and I wish I hadn’t. Robin is a good friend, but you’re kind of the closest thing I’ve ever had to a best friend, I think. And I threw that all away over hurt feelings. Puberty, am I right?” I giggle. 
“S’ not silly to remember that. And you weren’t being stupid, sweetheart. You were hurt, you were protecting yourself and I don’t blame you for that. I should never have even walked away from you that night, but I did. And I don’t deserve your forgiveness for it,” Eddie says. 
More words mumble out of his mouth but none of it registers. Soon the noise stops and I feel Eddie’s warm hands pull my shoes all the way off, pushing my legs onto the bed and turning me to lay comfortably on my stomach. 
He must remember that’s my favorite way to sleep. 
My mind must really hate me because I swear, right before I fall asleep, I feel lips pressing gently to my forehead while a guitar calloused hand pushes hair away from my eyes. 
Of course, that didn’t actually happen because that’s not something Eddie would do. Right? Yeah, he wouldn’t…
A timid shake to my shoulder pulls me from my dozing. 
“Hey, shortcake, it’s time for you to go in.” 
There’s only one person who’s ever called me by that nickname. 
“Hm, it’s been a while since you’ve called me that…Eds.” 
I don’t know what made me decide to use his nickname. It never seemed right to use it after we drifted so far apart when James left. 
Eddie helps pull me to my feet. 
‘Hmmm, he’s always been a lot stronger than he looks. I barely even lifted myself up for him.’ 
“Oh, now you wanna be all friendly again? Using a nickname and everything? What’s this all about, huh?” Eddie says, steadying me with his calloused hands when my legs wobble.   
My brows furrow, “What’s that supposed to mean?” 
“Earlier, when we were in the house. You practically ran away from me. I mean, it’s just that we…we haven’t seen each other since we went into the upside down. I thought maybe,” he lets out a long breath. “Maybe things had changed or something, I guess. I was hoping we could talk about it after we all got out but you’ve been avoiding everyone.” 
“And why is that? Why do you think things would have changed Eddie?” 
~
“No! No, no, no! Edward Munson, if you cut that rope, so help me god!” 
“You know I always love when you use my full name.” 
And the bastard cuts the rope. 
The next thing I know, he’s out of the trailer doing something entirely too heroic and the exact amount of stupid he always is. 
Before I can think I shove Dustin out of the trailer, the one not in the upside down, and send him to go help Lucas. 
“No! We need to help him! Can’t you see that he needs help!” 
“I know Dustin, I know. That’s why I’m staying here. But I need you to go find Lucas and Erica and check on Max. There are others who still need our help, Henderson. Please, listen to me and go help them.” 
I turn back into the trailer before he can disagree again, locking the door to make sure he doesn’t follow. Without second guessing, I jump through the portal, landing somewhat safely on my side. 
I manage to find a bike and just a few minutes later I’m riding as fast as I can towards the bat tornado that Eddie stands in the middle of. 
“Eddie you dumb jerk, you better not be getting yourself killed!” I scream at the top of my lungs. His eyes catch mine as a look of horror crosses his face. 
“Why the hell did you follow me? I specifically told you not to!” 
“Yeah, well I specifically told you not to cut the rope!” 
We fight off the bats as best we can until they all suddenly drop to the ground. 
Eddie and I stand breathing hard, our brains trying to catch up with all of what just happened. Eddie turns to me, a grin beginning to form. 
I punch him as hard as I can in the chest. And then I do it again, and then again and again, until I’m pounding my fists against his chest over and over again. 
“What the hell?! Honey, stop, you’re gonna hurt yourself!” 
I choke on hiccupping sobs as hot tears overflow past my lashes. 
“Don’t you ever do something like that again! Ever!” 
Eddie grabs my wrists to keep me from hitting him anymore. I keep trying until I realize his hold on me is too strong. 
“Princess, you gotta stop. I don’t want to see you hurt anymore, please stop.” 
He wraps his arms around me, stroking the back of my hair, pressing soft kisses to my forehead. 
“It’s okay, sweetheart, it’s okay. We’re okay, I promise.” 
“That was not okay, Eddie. Not okay!” I tell him looking up into his eyes. 
“I’m sorry, I really am. But look, we did it!” 
He looks down at me thoughtfully. His eyes flit down to my lips. My breath catches. 
He couldn’t possibly be… 
His lips are on mine. And Eddie Munson is kissing me. 
Both of his hands are on the side of my face, rubbing his thumbs softly across the apples of my chubby cheeks. 
I pull away, “What do you think you’re doing?” 
“Kissing my shortcake,” he says with a smirk while I grimace at the phrase. He laughs at the face I make and kisses me again. 
I kiss back harder this time, getting lost in all things Eddie. The way his hair feels soft even despite being so dirty. His lips are somehow minty. He smells like smoke and old books. 
My heart soars. This has to be proof, then. Eddie must think of me the way I think of him. I can’t imagine ever kissing someone with this much passion if it didn’t mean something more. I smile into the kiss.
Footsteps sound behind where we stand and Eddie pushes me off of him, placing several feet between us. I look at him confused and hurt by his sudden change in behavior. He refuses to meet my eyes. He even wipes the back of his hand across his mouth, looking straight ahead at Steve, Robin and Nancy appearing in front of us. 
Oh.
He’s too embarrassed to let his new friends see him with the big girl? Is that what it is? Does he suddenly regret kissing me? Was it just a heat of the moment type of deal, then? I was the closest human thing, so he settled on me for a little ‘yay the world didn’t end’ kiss?
In my whole life, I don’t think anything has hurt as much as that did. 
~
An uncomfortable amount of silence fills the air.. 
“Things got weird after James left, but you know that. We both felt it, even though we tried to ignore it. Jason started to act like he ran the damn school even though we were friends at one point. I never saw you because we were never at your house anymore. Then I got held back and we basically had every class together. Then I got held back again and you graduated. I missed you. I really, really missed you,” he says the last part quietly. Almost like he was afraid for me to hear it. I hold back a scoff.
“I missed you so much, it’s ridiculous. I just wanted my shortcake back. My sweetheart, my princess, my honey,” he laughs to himself, I stay quiet. “God, I was such a jerk to you growing up. And not because ‘I had a crush on you’ because that’s bullshit, guys shouldn’t be allowed to be mean to girls with the excuse of it being ‘romantic’. I wish I had treated you better, been a little friendlier. I never realized how much you meant to me until your brother’s graduation.” 
He takes his eyes away from his feet to glance at me. 
“Do you remember that night? It was your first time drinking and you got so sleepy I had to tuck you into bed. You had told me about you and Danny at that party and it made me jealous. I’d never really felt jealous before, certainly not like that at least. It made me realize how deep my feelings for you went.” 
I remain silent, partly because I didn’t want to interrupt him when this is the most honest and vulnerable he’s ever been, out of respect, and partly because I was utterly confused and angered by what he was saying and claiming.
“You forgave me for leaving you alone at the dance, even though I never deserved to be forgiven for that. I didn’t even know how badly you were being bullied at school until you told me, that’s not a person who deserves to be forgiven.” 
A soft laugh and a pause. “I guess what I’m saying is…is I wish things had, in fact, changed after Vecna. And I know, that’s probably not something you want to hear because I know it’s not the same for you but I figure if you’re not gonna talk to me anyway, I may as well tell you, right?” 
He takes a step towards the house but I don’t let him get far. 
“What do you mean it’s ‘not the same for me’?” 
“Well obviously you’ve been ignoring me since I kissed you so, clearly it wasn’t something you wanted.” He shrugs his shoulders. “And that’s okay. I’m not saying you have to be with me or anything, I’m just saying…I don’t know what I’m saying.” 
“I’ve been ignoring you?” I ask, dumbfounded by his idiocy. 
“Well, yeah. You haven’t even been answering the walkie.” 
“And you think that was because I didn’t want to kiss you? Not because, oh, I don’t know, maybe the fact that the second Nance and the others showed up you shoved me away from you? It couldn’t have been because it was obvious you couldn’t stand the thought of being seen with me?” 
Eddie’s face drains of color. 
“I can’t help but see now that this is all you think I deserve. A quick kiss when no one can see, right? A little making out before someone can figure who you’re with, huh?” 
“No! That is not at all what that was! I can’t believe you would think that. I pushed you away so you wouldn’t be seen with me!” he shouts, cutting me off. 
“What?” 
“The whole town wanted me for murder! Murder! They thought I was running a cult that killed my friend as a sacrifice! My friend! I didn’t want you to be tied to that anymore than you already were, so I pushed you off before the others could see. If someone, somehow went yapping about a girlfriend of mine and things went sideways when we got out of the upside down, you might have gone down with me and I couldn’t let that happen. I just couldn’t. I was going to tell you all of this as soon as I could but you never let me get the chance, and I see why now. I am so sorry it looked like I was embarrassed to be with you, but that will never be the case with me.” 
He takes my face in his hands and looks me directly in the eyes. 
“You are single-handedly the most beautiful person I have ever met. Inside and out. You have always cared for me and the old Hellfire Club. Don’t think I didn’t know it was you sending cookies on our campaign nights, even after graduating. I remember when I showed up at your house looking for James because some older kids had taken my lunch money in middle school, little you went after them yourself and did one helluva job doing it. You sat me down and cleaned me up. Gave me peas to put on my forehead.”  
It was like a forgotten memory was just pulled up by his words, I did remember that. 
“I could never be embarrassed by you, ever. I don’t care what people think. I…I love you. And I love your hair, and I love your eyes, and I love your laugh, and I love your stomach and your thighs, and I love your mind. I love you and I hope you can see it. I hope…I hope you can see me,” he finishes off in a very quiet whisper, tilting his head down and away from my eyes. 
I place my hands over his that still hold my face. 
“I have always seen you, Eddie Munson. Always.” 
His head jolts up to look me in the eyes once more. 
“God, Eddie, I’m so sorry. I know you’re not a horrible person, I should have known, I’m so sorry. God, you were literally being hunted for murder and I was crying about you being embarrassed by me? I’m so fucking sorry.” 
I shake my head and take a deep breath. 
“I love you, I have for so long. I love the way you smile, I love the way you’re not afraid to take up space, I love the way you’re there for Dustin, the way you were there for me countless times. I love you and your horrible music.”
“Hey, now. Watch it.”
I laugh, “I love you and I see you and I’m so sorry.” 
“It’s okay, it’s okay. You’re forgiven, I promise. You didn’t even really need to apologize in the first place.” 
“Yes, I did. Because none of that was fair to you.” 
“And none of that was fair to you, shortcake. It’s okay.” 
I look at his lips, and that’s all the cue Eddie needs to kiss me. Finally. We put our hearts into it, getting lost in each other. Getting lost in our sudden understandings of the other.  
“We’re both really kinda stupid aren’t we? Stupid and oblivious,” I say, chuckling quietly. 
“Oh, definitely. I mean, we’ve known each other for, what, at least ten years and we couldn’t figure this out without a bunch of drama?” 
“It seems very on brand for you actually, you’ve always been one for the dramatics.” 
“I love you.” 
“And I love you.”
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smileysuh · 2 years ago
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Hiii I have a question. So I'm part of your patreon and noticed something that I was simply curious about.
In your patreon posts sometimes certain words or phrases are bolded, usually when writers do that it's because they're following a prompt with that phrase...i was just curious if there was any particular reason.
Love all your work but I have to say meanie sandwiches are my fave 🤤
oooh yes hello!!!!
the short of it is: i like bolding words that have impact!
and the long of it is: an example-oriented analysis below the cut ;)
so just to start- i was taught in school that there's emphasis- and then there's... emphasis.
I've seen the emphasis on emphasis shown in this sentence told 7 ways-
1: I never said she stole my money
2: I never said she stole my money
3: I never said she stole my money
4: I never said she stole my money
5: I never said she stole my money
6: I never said she stole my money
7: I never said she stole my money
and when you add bolds- you can do even mORE with controlling just hOW people may read/verbalize what's being said into their own mind while reading, you know?
pacing- intense characters that have good control of the room are good with strong one-liners or just lines that do punch after punch-
for example
“See?” he practically purrs. “And do you know what that means, baby? That your pretty pussy is wet just from the sound of my fucking voice- It means you’re a sinner.” The gamer chuckles, then his mood shifts drastically. “What would your new little boyfriend think, hmm? Would he be turned on by the fact that you’re a needy little cockwhore? Or would he be upset- that you’re only ever a good obedient little slut for the master who trained you?” - paperclip
versus
“See?” he practically purrs. “And do you know what that means, baby? That your pretty pussy is wet just from the sound of my fucking voice- It means you’re a sinner.” The gamer chuckles, then his mood shifts drastically. “What would your new little boyfriend think, hmm? Would he be turned on by the fact that you’re a needy little cockwhore? Or would he be upset- that you’re only ever a good obedient little slut for the master who trained you?” - paperclip w/no bolds
boldened words make the reader slow down- they stand out from the paragraph- and yeah :) I've been adding them to be more precise with my vision for the dialogue of some of these dudes :)
and oof thank you for your patreon support and comment about loving meanie best- they're a pretty dynamic duo :) after a quick look through- Mingyu and Wonwoo don't have AS many boldened words as some other people i write for- *like hyuck* but they have their own interesting uses for bolds-
like in this line:
You feel bad because it had been your mistake, not Wonwoo’s- he had known all along- in fact, he’d even said, speak of the devil, and what does the devil wear? “Prada is in every season-” Mingyu continues while Wonwoo adjusts your thighs over his shoulders - celebrated
the boldened sections in this case kind of do a question and answer thing while also touching on a common saying "the devil wears Prada," but because the saying isn't a direct word for word, the bold was used to highlight the sentiment/flow of the repurposed phrase in a way that would visually make it more cohesive :)
it turns into something maybe more like this:
in fact, he’d even said[...] speak of the devil [...] and [what does the devil wear]? “[Prada] [...] is in[...] every season-”[...] Mingyu continues while Wonwoo adjusts your thighs over his shoulders - celebrate
writing is so fun- there are some rules, but for bold and italics- you can play around and i think there's so much more that can be added when you take your time at certain moments through a fic with pacing in bolds :)
goodness, hope this made sense :)
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peach-and-bugs · 3 years ago
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❤️Fallen Star - Wanda Maximoff x fem!Reader (she/they pronouns)❤️
Marvel canon divergence 
❤️Chapter 1❤️ Ch 2
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Summary: You don't remember much of what happened during the experiments, or before them honestly. Your mind seems to be protecting you from that somehow. You've been on your own for a year now and you can't recall what normal life used to be like. Now, everything is mixed up and you've somehow been taken in by a group that calls themselves the Avengers.
It's a good situation, but it still has its challenges. However, you don't expect the quiet girl that never talks to you but is always around for some strange reason to be one of those challenges. 
-❤️-
(y/n is a former HYDRA experiment that was assumed to be a failure when she encountered the mind stone, but what HYDRA didn't realize was that they were given the ability to morph her inner being into the form of light, aiding in her accidental escape. Now, after a year running from people who had no clue they should be looking for her, y/n has been taking in by the Avengers.)
Warnings: implied amnesia, talk of corpses, flashbacks of trauma, experimentation
Word count: 1353
Extra notes: large sections of italics are flashbacks
A/N: Surprise! Here’s a Wanda x Reader! I actually started this one before Passing Notes, (my Agatha x Reader, if you didn’t know) but it took a backseat after I got really invested in Passing Notes. I don’t know how fast this one is going to update or how long it will be, but it will probably move slower than Passing Notes. I can see myself working on this when I hit a wall with other fics, so this is kind of a backup in a way? I’m still excited to see how ya’ll like it though, so leave your thoughts in the comments or my asks! ❤️
-❤️-
Everything is fuzzy. In your head, it's all blurry, like a static television. Continuously, you know that something’s missing. You know you had a family, a childhood, and you like to think that it was a good one, but it's lost. You have bits and pieces that you can somewhat recall, but they feel like pieces of a puzzle, just not the puzzle you’re working on.
You recall fundamental things, which is good, you assume. You know your name, y/n. You know your age, 25 (although you could be off give or take a few months. You don’t know your birthday.) You liked to read and enjoyed music as a child, you just don’t know what kind it was. But that’s about it. You know there's more in there, in your head, but it's locked up. 
Now, all you really remember is Hydra. Your time there hadn’t been long. A year, maybe two. There was a reason you were there. Of course, the reason why is locked in the memory vault, as you've been calling it. You’ve been trying to stay optimistic but that's hard when you’re not sure if you're an optimist or a pessimist naturally. 
Hydra had been a dark time for you. You assumed that it had been for most people involved with them. Hydra had said they were looking to fix the world. They thought they were, but it was the wrong way to do it. You understood this, but in your position, you had no choice but to comply with their demands. There had been lab work, testing, needles, blood. All those types of things that you would see in human testing. You realized once you escaped that you had just been a lab rat the whole time. It was a disgusting realization.
Your escape was a whole other story. It’s the clearest memory you have, but you rarely attempt to recall it. It’s the one thing that you wish you could forget, but can’t. You especially can’t forget it on nights like this. Nights where it's raining hard again, where dirt roads become mud and everyone is stranded in their homes. So you find yourself shivering as you trudge through the cold, trying desperately to forget like you forgot everything else when your memory plays like a film. 
-*-
“Test subject thirteen A, please state your name and status,” a voice called over a crackly intercom as you had been guided into the testing room. Your hands shook. Your skin was covered in goosebumps as freezing air swirls around your bare legs. You walked on open grates, minding your balance as the metal sent another chill shooting through your spine. Looking up, you were met with a glass wall that must have been a two-way mirror. They see you, but you don’t see them.
“Um, y/f/n y/l/n. Volunteer…” you murmured as the hair on the back of your neck started to stand on end. The word “volunteer” bothers you now as the memory plays out. You recall the lump that formed in your throat before you said it. 
“Alright, Miss y/l/n. Please approach the scepter for us and touch the stone,” you had been instructed. You’re not getting out of here, not alive anyway. No one who has entered has come out alive. You wanted to cry. Cry because you were scared and you weren't ready. You didn’t want to die, not like this. Not in your early twenties as some test subject, you recall thinking as you shakily approached the scepter. 
With a shaking breath, you swallowed back the tears that blurred your vision at the moment. After that, it all went black. 
-*-
You recall watching as they got rid of you. They threw your body into the mud just outside of the compound. You expect that they assumed you would be washed away in the rain. You don’t know how any of it happened. All you could do was watch as an invisible ghost. You had literally been thrown out of your body. 
When the men left you alone, you stood over what you assumed was your corpse. You looked so pale, so dead. This is what you assumed death was, anyway. No heaven, no hell, just watching. You let yourself cry now. You don’t know if it was actually crying, but it felt the same as when you were alive. You made no sound, no actual tears. Just the familiar agonizing feeling. 
You still aren't sure what drove you to reach out, but in your moment of weakness, you crouched down in front of yourself. You reached out your wispy gold fingertips to trace the curve of your cheekbone when you sucked back into yourself. The world somersaulted and you jolted out of the mud with a screaming gasp for air. 
-*-
That had been over a year ago. You ran after that, and you still haven't stopped. You’ve been all over Europe by now, taking all the odd jobs you could, but not staying anywhere too long. You had no idea if they knew you were alive, but you didn’t want to risk anything. Your powers have revealed themselves more over time, and you have formed some kind of mutual understanding with them in a way. 
You control your inner being, or your soul, as some would rather call it. You can leave your body in a ghost-like form, which is how you unintentionally made your grand escape. You have also learned how to remove a part of your inner being temporarily to form an illusion. Bigger illusions require more of your being and energy, which means you get hungrier and you sleep longer for a little while, depending on how much and how long you were keeping the illusion. You’ve since learned how to use your power with less exertion, but you still have room to improve. 
You now walk through the rain in an attempt to find somewhere safe again. You only showed up in this village tonight, so you had to be careful. You have to seem like a normal traveler so Hydra can’t find you. (If they were even looking.) That’s what you always told yourself. Keep moving so they don’t find you. That’s how you stay alive and safe. You don’t know what they would do if they found you. 
Maybe you’d be tested on, or dissected. They could also use you as their weapon. You don’t want that. You have the potential to be dangerous. You still haven't fully discovered your powers and a part of you doesn’t want to know more. You just want a normal, simplistic life. You laugh now at the thought. With powers and a backstory like yours, there's no such thing as “normal.” 
The world isn’t ready for people like you. Sure, the Avengers exist and are celebrated for their abnormalities, but you’re not an Avenger. The Avengers have abilities that can be explained. You don’t even know what made you like this, let alone how it happened. You don’t seem to know anything, you think as you make your way to the outskirts of the closed-up village. 
You stop when you reach an old abandoned building just inside a line of trees, semi-hidden by bushes. It wasn’t ideal, but it would do. The door sticks in the mud, but you eventually get it open, trailing mud into the building. It's old and falling apart. Holes in the ceiling let the rain fall inside as stained glass windows distort the moonlight that comes in. The walls are covered in angels and martyrs, religious figures. 
The word comes to you with a little thinking. It’s a church. You don’t remember ever going to church before everything that happened. You decide to stay. You don’t know how long, but at the very least till it stops raining. You settle into a dry corner, huddling up with the gear you've collected over your year of travel. After reliving your memory once tonight, the rain no longer bothers you. Instead, it lulls you into a state of dreamless sleep.
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heartxclouds · 4 years ago
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Diabolik Lovers: Wrong Blood-Prisonned Bridal;;Part 1
[C]♡. Hello! Welcome to this blog..
This is my first try on writting my DL AU, which is called Wrong Blood-Prisonned Bridal if you are new to it! I think that I am experienced enough in writting so this is why I took the courage to write it! I do hope that you enjoy and follow the instructions clearly because yes, I have a rules in here- It isn't forced but you still need to view the rules. 📄
Rules;; {+ Instructions}
If you click on a OST link, you can hear the music ^^
When something is written in italic, it means that it's a wisper.
I would appreciate it if you have enjoyed the story, that you comment or like! Like that it makes me want to continue! If you need to give me constructive critism please send me a PM (Private Message).
In here there will be some spooky things so if you dislike that a lot, please proceed with caution. PS: Niko is a gypsy, that isn't meant as a slur. Niko is a girl that travels, does fortune telling and dances. So don't worry. I'm not here to offend.
If you see a edit with subtitles, read the subtitles! And if you can't see a image clear? Click on it!
Some edits are old or come from friends! I will credit them don't worry, they will be credited in the section 'Information'. And for the old edits, I'll put old in the end of the post in section 'Iformation'.
Thank you for reading the rules! I hope you enjoy this now. 🎃🍂
...
It was afternoon, at this time.. Many kids were playing. Screams of joy because of hide and seek, sometimes pain because they fell and even tears or joy because they were laughing so much. But there was one little girl that wasn't in the mood for playing. She would rather read books at this time of the day, she had secretly picked out some books out of the small library of her mother. Vampires..What were they? Monsters- Bloodsuckers- Creatures of the night... The little gypsy girl was amazed by these stories but also terrified. Welcome to the world of the small Niko Riverdale.
Winter.. It was cold but fun, Niko turned six years old not long ago. She felt like she could be a adult any second. Niko loved to play as the little adult.. But to be honest, it was scary. People always had some type of disgusted look when they spotted a gypsy, and it was like this everywhere. But on the possitieve side.. Some people could be nice and accept them, even enjoy they're dances. A gypsy was never meant to have a bad view.. Being a gypsy was seen as some kind of culture too. The priest always said that God hates gypsy's.. That if you were one, that a spirit will haunt you.. Kill you.. Destroy you. All kids from Niko's age knew the dark reality already, God? Hah.. When did God help? That's what they were thinking.. But Niko thought otherwise, she believes that God is good.
-"Mom.. Why do people hate us?"
Niko was holding the hand of her mother while they were walking back home. Reading hour was finished and Niko had hidden those vampire themed books in her bag before her mother got to see it.
-"Ah.. Don't worry about that honey.. You know.. In this world there are people that can hate you without a good reason.. That is why we need to be strong."
Her mother had felt some un-easy feeling.. Excactly, why did people hate them? She didn't know the answer herself... She held the hand of her daughter slightly tighter, they would go to the cathedral before getting back home. She entered the building and went to the small praying spot that was there. She looked at her daughter, she would need to pick a different one.. Niko went to the Maria statue that wasn't too far away from her mother.
-"My God.. I'm here to ask you questions.. I hope that I don't bother you at this moment but..Do you hate me? Or my mom..? My gypsy people..? You know.. Today some kids didn't want to play with me.. They're parents didn't want that.. Even if it was my birtday.. Hmph.. And God, I'm 6 years old now.. That's a lot, right? Hehe.. Will you please answer me..? I now pray this in the name of our saviour. Amen.."
Niko did the quick cross sign before walking back to her mother, that seemed to have finished her praying. Niko held the hand of her mother.. Did God hear her? Will she get the message..? Who knows.. Maybe God, had a surprise.
After getting home, having dinner and having a bath.. Niko was relaxed and ready to read some more about the nocturnal horror creatures.. Curiousity really killed the cat.. And Niko was clearly the cat in this example. The moon was up.. The beautifull blue moon that shinned in Niko's room, Niko could observe those beautifull night skies forever.. She didn't realise that is was already 2 AM, Niko would be in trouble if her parents found out that she was still up.
{[OST|https://youtu.be/9xWi_RkqYiM]}
But strangely a sound ruined the silence.. Crying.. Rather disturbing. A fenale voice? Calling out for help but it all sounded like a echo. For a kid this could be creepy looking, but for Niko.. She was worried.. Not about that sudden visit in her house of a crying voice but she was actually concerned about the feelings of the person.. Did they need to escape? Was there a killer outside? No.. Not at all. Niko got out her room and walked down the hallway.. The wood plancs made a creak sound. The more Niko approached.. The more the crying became louder. She could see now.
A woman with pretty long white hair was sitting on her knees on the floor. Her clothing was white too- She also had some kind of long blue see-through scarf, she also had white gloves, pretty ones that people always wore when they were from a rich family.. Her skin was pale, as pale as porcelin.
-"Umm.. Miss..? What's wrong? What is happening..? Are you hurt..?"
Niko was a child with good manners but it was kinda weird.. How did that woman come in? The door was locked, the windows too.. Who was this woman? Or what is she? The crying didn't stop but when Niko placed her hand on the shoulder of the beauty, then she turned around and held Niko's shoulders tightly.
-"Where is h-he?! WHERE IS HE?! I NEED HIM-?! MY CHILD.. HAVE YOU SEEN MY CHILD?! AHHHH!!!? I WANT HIM BACK! I WANT HIM BACK?! HE NEEDS TO BE FIXED.. HE NEEDS TO BE HAPPY!! WHERE IS HE?! AHHH?!!?? TELL-?! TELL MEEEE AAHHHH!?!"
Niko felt paralyzed.. A random woman just came here and was finding her child.. Her child is broken? He needs to be fixed? That woman didn't look normal at all either.. She was way too pale for a human being.. It was dead skin colour.. She had long fangs too.. And also you could see through her..? A ghost-? A spirit?! Niko's eyes were tearing up- God, can God explain?! Why don't Niko's parents hear this?! Was she crazy?! Niko just got out the grip and ran to her room and locked it, she got on her bed and hid under the covers.
-"God please.. Make it stop.. Make it stop.. I'm scared.. Don't give me to Satan.. Not the devil, I beg you.. Do you hate me? Is this my curse now?"
This was a bad experience for a child, it could be traumatizing.. Niko was praying for this to stop, but then she heard the loud banging against her door- She was screamed.. The woman was still crying and screaming.
-"FIX HIM?! YOU CAN FIX HIM!! FIND HIM!! YOU MUST FIND HIM!?? DO IT PLEASE!!!"
Niko hugged her knees, she was way too scared to say anything or open the door. Niko cried in her sleep.. In the background she could still hear the crying.. The crying of a female vampire ghost..
...
[{OST}|https://youtu.be/NvMROvgMOz0]
[C]...
It was night time, a few nights have passed since that incident and that woman always kept her awake- Screaming and crying.. Niko was hidding under the covers- Hoping that it would stop soon. She held her bunny plush close, it was a white bunny with red buttons as eyes.. It clearly was a old design, but she loves it. The banging on the door soon stopped.. But it replaced with a wisper. Was Niko getting crazy? Hearing wispers in her head.. That made Niko just hug her plush tighter.
-"Go to the forest.. In the forest you'll find a mansion.. I need you to fix him.. Please"
Niko looked down- She letted out a sigh.. Even if her parents forbid her to go out at night- She would do it- Like that the nights without sleep will stop..Maybe. Niko puts on her small brown boots and then got out the house after grabbing her plushie and wearing a yellow jacket, it matched her eyes perfectly. Now, Niko got in the dark forest.. Why did she forget the flashlight?? She hugged her plush tighter.
-"It's you and me mister carrots.. We will finish this.."
You could hear in Niko's voice that she was scared- She planned to get back home and get the flashlight.. But it already was too late- Her house wasn't visible anymore. Was she lost-? Niko started to tear up, she felt stressed and she could sense that there was danger close by. Niko didn't trust the sound of breaking twigs and leafes that were being crushed.. Without further hesitation, she started to run- She didn't care that she could see nothing- Her mind told her to run. And she was lucky that she started running now, because the hungry wolves were out now, howling and groaning, they wanted the eady prey that was there now.. And the prey was Niko. A girl her size and her age was as easy as catching a mouse.
{ [Wolf howling|https://youtu.be/66HKBdZe_WA]}
-"HELP!! PLEASE SOMEBODY!! WOLVES!! HELP!!"
Niko was screaming while running- But nobody was there to save her- But God must have heard her wish.. The mansion- It was there- Right infront of her! Niko quickly openned the door and got in. She heard the wolves outside, they were howling and sniffing where she was hidding. There was a moment of silence soon.. Were they gone? Niko peeked through the window to see if those carnivores were still there and it seemed that they dessapeared.
-"Hehe!! No dinner for you guys!"
Niko giggled happily, she was happy to stay alive- But soon after her short victory dance, she felt something.. No.. Someone behind her- She gulped and then slowly turned her head to see a tall man.. His eyes were some type of dark pink and his hair was purple- He also was wearing glasses. Niko stepped back as her eyes were wide from how scared she was- Will he hurt her..?
-"Entering the house of someone like that is really dissrespectfull. You need to learn some manners."
The male was getting straight to the point- His expression was serious and he clearly wasn't happy with Niko's action from before. Niko quickly openned the door and ran out- This was unexpected. She never knew that someone lived there.. No wonder that it looked so clean.
The man with glasses sighed as he watched a albino with the corner ofhis eye.
-"Oh.. So you did decide to come for dinner. I am waiting for your apologize. The dinner is cold and everyone is back to their rooms."
The purple haired man walked away, slightly annoyed. He puts his gloves on in a more comfortable manner as he was walking. The albino narrowed his eyebrows as he gave off a 'tch' noise, he just got back from the garden not long ago. Who was that girl though? How did she find this hidden mansion? He wondered.. But he won't think about it too much. He went to the dinning room.
Meanwhile, Niko had ran away from the mansion.. Fear was described in her eyes. But then- Her house, she saw it.. And yet, she didn't run far away from the mansion. Magic? How? She turned around.. Only trees were seen. How in the world? The small brunnette ran quickly to her home and her parents waited for her.. Crying tears of relief and ordering her to never ever do that again but.. Will she keep that promise-?
✧.*ೃ༄9 Years later...
The sound of the flutes and tambourines filled the streets, the gypsy's were there.. And it seemed that Niko and her sisters were the ones to dance. The same thing happened once again, for some the disgusted look and for some others there was the look of enjoyement. The gypsies how flexible and gracious moves- They always had a beautifull performance in mind. After the dance performance, niko and her sisters earned some money.. They will use this for food and clothing... And for Niko's mother, Rei. She was doing fortune telling to get money for the small house that they have.
The golden eyes of the brunnette spotted a animal..A cat..A white one to be specefic. She stared at it for quite a while- The cat looked at Niko and purred before walking away. Niko sighed a bit as she furrowed her eyebrows. Then Niko realised that her siblings were already going back home- She better quickly catch up with them.. Niko openned the door of the house and watched her father, he was laying on his usual dark blue couch.. She sighed and went to him, seeing that he was sleeping for bow. Niko smiled softly and puts a blanket over her father.. You could sleep better if you were cozy and warm. Niko remembered that she needed to handle something quick- She went to the door and openned it.
-"Where are you going?"
Her big brother John saw that she was planning to leave..Even if it was almost dinner time. He placed the wood in the fire, it was spring and yet it felt like it was still winter.
-"I'm going to the church.. I'll be back home soon though, see ya..!"
Niko got out once more and step by step made her way to the holy building..To be honest, the church was scary.. All dark colours and paintings of suffering- Even some god statues were scary. But Niko always felt much calmer when she saw the Maria statue. She closed her eyes and held her hands together.
-"God.. It is already nine years and three months that this ghost is haunting me.. The cries, they scare. Please help me..Give me a sign to freedom. In the name of our saviour. Amen.."
Niko could not live forever with this kind of ghost that visits her each night. Each time begging to save her child more specefictly her son.. What was this all about? She letted out a sigh- A sad one.. A concerned one. Was this all in her head? Was Niko getting crazy? Her parents and siblings didn't realky believe her.. Her mother did but she didn't know what to do. She rubbed her forehead and just went back home after doing the little cross sign. Niko really believed that god exists.. That someone is watching you.. Sins, Actions, Desires..Wishes. It was scary and yet so releaving in her opinion. After having dinner and a family talk, it was time to prepare for bed. Niko took a shower to refresh herself, she brushed her teeth, got in a fresh nightgown and then finnaly got in bed.
{ [OST|https://youtu.be/aG-39UWA4u0]}
Niko knew what will be going on tonight, she just hoped that it will stop. Each time, she repeats that hope. 12 pm.. It's almost time, Niko's eyes stayed open- She probably won't be able to sleep this night again. This was a punishement.. Was it really though? Niko didn't know but it was horrible to go through.
-"Go..Go.. Go back to the mansion.. He needs you.. You need to make him happy. Please. That's my only wish.."
-"W-Why can't you just leave me alone?"
-"Go..Go.. Go back to the mansion.. He needs you.. You need to make him happy. Please. That's my only wish.."
This repeated over and over again. Niko tried to get a other answer but it still was the same the "Go..Go.. Go back to the mansion.. He needs you.. You need to make him happy. Please. That's my only wish.." was always repeating. Niko had enough, she will go back there, early in the morning to not get wolves or other wild animals after her.
And she really did this plan. In the morning, around 5 am, she got up and got in her red gypsy dress and she wrapped a yellow scarf around her waist, she also puts on her yellow bandana after that she had brushed her long brown hair. She took a quick toast from the kitchen and frowned. She will return back home like last time, she was sure that it would happen as planned.
-"Let's get done with this"
Niko mumbled after getting out and going to the forest. Niko could see now where she was going. It wasn't dark, it was sunny already. The brunnette tried to find the mansion, but it was nowhere to be seen. It really annoyed her, she wanted to not be haunted by that woman anymore, she didn't want to struggle anymore with it. This was going to be the end. Did she really need to wish for the mansion to appear out of nowhere??
Niko ran through the bushes but that caused her to trip, she shook her head and got up after wiping some of the dirt away. But then.. When she lifted her eyes back up to normal. It was there- The mansion that she searched for for hours long. Niko stepped towards the gates-
Niko gulped when the gates went open on it's own. This was..Magic? No way. She must be dreaming. Niko slapped her cheeks with her hands.
-"Gah.. Niko-chan.. Wake uppppp..! Owie-"
Niko stopped slapping her cheeks and took a big inhale before taking the courage to enter the territory of the mansion. A certain stress overwhelmed Niko, it was uncomfortable... As if she was going in some type of haunted mansion. The crows were watching Niko, some letting out their loud bird noises.. These type of birds were mostly around graveryards. Which made this give more of a creepy atmosphere. Niko knocked on the door and waited- She learned last time that shouldn't just enter a house/mansion out of nowhere.. But hey she had no other choice. Niko saw that the door openned.. But weirdly nobody was behind it. Anyone would be running away from this already..No? Niko would have loved to do that but she really wanted to get the spirit away from her. So- Niko got in and looked around..
-"Helloo?? Someone here..? Uh.."
{[OST|https://youtu.be/_iF7lkXKHlA]}
Niko wanted to check first of course. And yet, there was no reply.. Maybe they weren't home? The brunnette wanted to know what the woman meant. 'Make him happy' 'Fix him' 'He needs you', her only wish. The spirit meant a person? Of course- Niko facepalmed. The brunnette still felt that same uncomfortable feeling, that feeling of being watched. This place wasn't safe.. It wasn't safe at all!! Niko had shivers running down her spine. Blood.. Blood running down the walls, Niko's visions made her think that.. This mansion.. It had bad secrets.. Secrets that nobody should ever know about.
Run..
Niko's mind kept telling her to run. Run for your life. Run for you freedom before-
Niko had ran back to the front door, it won't open?! No no- This wasn't the plan. God, what did Niko end up into?! Tears ran down her cheeks as fear took her over once more, was she trapped? Was this a prank??
Niko felt a hand on her shoulder.. She hesitated to look behind, but after some seconds she did. A albino man, right there..Glaring down at her with his intimidating look. Niko could not take it anymore.. She fainted. The man catched her in time and groaned.
Run for your freedom before it's too late..
It's too late...
He snarled when he saw her exposed neck with her black chocker necklace. He seemed to hold back something- He seemed to control it for now. The man openned his lips to speak out his words;
End of episode 1... 🍂
Information section:
Time taken: Started on 6 oct 2020- Finished on 14 oct 2020.
Credits;; Story (@me); Edits (@Me) Niko at the gates (Old edit)
I hope that you enjoyed! And I also hope that you would like to follow my journey of Wrong Blood!
See you soon... 🎃
I had posted this long ago but I wanted to share it here too♡
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