#i do the dishes without asking because I DONT LIKE a dirty kitchen. yes my partner also dont like a dirty kitchen! and yes when i clean

[jenovann]

>"Boil enough water for two coffees'

>"Take pictures of things that remind them of me just to show me'

>"Just want to appease their own need'

>"What would feel good or grand to deliver'

>Mfw insecurities are the foundation of relationships now

[shadowwing15]

Secret Lover

Tenya Iida x f!reader

Summary: Tenya visits his family for dinner and tells them that he has an girlfriend

Tw: nothing only fluff and a bit of fun

Author's Note :

Hello my Friends. Here is another idea of me. @wow-life-love4 and @uwu-iwanttodie you wanted to be tagged. Finally I finished this. It is a bit shorter than I thought, but it is still funny. Hope you like it. If you have ideas or requests than you can ask me to write it.

~Shadow

__________________________________________________________________________________

Love. It is a big word for Tenya. Before he came to UA he didn't thought much about it. But then he met you. You both quickly became friends and a part of the Dekusquad. And as time goes by, Tenya realizes that he feels something more and deeper than friendship towards you. At first he tries to ignore it, but in the end he has to be true : he has fallen hard for you. With the help of Deku and Ochaco he finally confesses. You accepted with no hesitation , because you felt the same towards him. At this day , five months ago, Tenya felt happier than ever before.

In the last months you learned much about each other and Tenya was sure he made the right decission in asking you out and not ignoring his feelings. You just made him feel so much happiness and love, he couldnt imagine these past time without you. You always accepted it, when he didn’t had as much time as he wanted for you, due to schoolwork. When he was studying for an upcoming test you studied with him or brought him snacks and drinks. After training when he felt sore, you just lay him down on his bed and massage him. And the best thing were the daily cuddle sessions. With you in his arms he felt so save and loved, that sometimes he thought that all this was just a dream.

Even after this long time of dating he hasn't told his parents or brother yet. Until this day. His parents asked him if he would like to come over for dinner, since he lived in the UA dorms now and they hadn't seen each other in a long time. And who was he to deny it. And so he was sitting here at the table with his parents and his brother Tensei, eating his favorite dish: Beefstew.

Tensei and his father were talking about hero work, while Tenya and his mother listened to them. After a short pause, Tensei asked Tenya:" So when will you get a girlfriend ?", out of fun. Thinking that Tenya would say something like "I dont have time for one at the moment" or even " Not before I finish school", he took a sip of his grape juice only to spit it out again through his nose, after hearing Tenya answer :"I already have one." He was prepared for anything but not that he would say, that he has an girlfriend, in such an casual tone as if he got asked how the weather was outside. But not only Tensei was shocked but also his parents.

As Tenya looked up from his plate, he looked into the wet and shocked face of Tensei. "What?", he didn't understand why Tensei was so shocked," Have you thought that I would never find one, or what?", he asked after giving his brother a tissue. He just shook his head while cleaning his face, then he cleared his throat before speaking."No. I was just a bit confused and surprised that you said it in such an casual tone, as if it isn't important. So how long have you been together by now?" "Five nearly six months, I...." "SO LONG ALREADY?" Tensei nearly yelled. "Why haven't you told me ? I am your brother. Don't you love me ?" "No it's not like that. Yes you are my brother and I love you, but because we haven't seen us in the last months I kinda forgot to tell you." "Forgot to tell me? How can you forget to tell me that you have an girlfriend?" "Well school was very stressful and you didn't asked, so I didn't thought that it was so important to tell you immediately." Tenya tried to calm his brother down. Sadly it didn't really went well. "Just because I haven't asked it wasn't so important to tell me ? Do you know how long I waited for this day? And you tell me that it isn't that important ?" "Well yes... but... You know what? I will just call and ask her if she would like to come over for dinner some day, so you can meet her, better ?" "That is an wonderful idea, Tenya.", his mother answered before the discussion between him and Tensei would go on. "How about Saturday? "she asked. "Sure. I will ask her." And with that Tenya left the table. Tensei began to eat again and mumbled something about how important a girlfriend is. After Tenya finished the call, he returned to he table." Y/n would love to come over on Saturday." "Great" "So brother tell us something about her." Tensei said, now calmed down. "Well, Y/n is a wonderful person. She always helps our fellow classmates, no matter how many things she still has to do. She also prepares Bentos for them. Even for the teachers. It is like she has an 6. Sense, because she always knows who likes what and who has eaten something and who not. She also plans study sessions for everyone and brings their favorite snacks and drinks." "So she is a bit like a female version of you." "Well, Kaminari told us one day that we are like the class parents so...." " Yep, a female version of you, brother. Is she also so uptight ?" "No in these matters Y/n is more relaxed." "Good. Maybe she can help you to get this stick out of your ass." "TENSEI!!!!!!" Tenya yelled. "What? I'm just saying." Tensei laughed. "But seriously, after what you told us about her she must be a really friendly person." "Yes. Yes she is." "Well. I cant wait to meet her. But now I have to go to patrol. Good night brother." And with that Tensei left the table. Now Tenya and his parents were alone in the room, but they didn't asked any questions, so they all remained in silence. After Tenya finished his plate, he helped his parents to get the dirty dishes into the kitchen,before he said his goodbyes and made his way back to the dorms. On his way, he had many thoughts about the upcoming meeting between you and his family. But Tenya was sure that they will love you as much as he loved you.

[enchantedblackrose]

All the Pieces Pt 3

Gif not mine. Full credit to the owner. Taken from Google Images

All the Pieces

Sirius Black/Fem Reader

Warnings: unedited, mild language, alcohol consumption, brief mentions of underage drinking, small mention of bullying. Lengthy author's notes at the end. Also this was a huge PIA to write so hopefully it doesn't read too disconnected

Part 1|| Part 2|| Part 4|| Part 5

Part 3 of ?

When you touch me gently I remember how you know And the sun shines rings around your smile And I'm here laughing like a child -Pieces, Dan Powell

If it was any other person on your doorstep, you'd probably berate them for inducing that almost heart attack you just experienced. Instead you grab the familiar face by the sleeve of his worn jacket, pulling him into your living room.

"I could deck you, Remus John Lupin. I thought someone came for him. Ugh. Come here." Your arms wrap  around him for a tight hug, which he returns. "He's here, Remus. He's safe." You feel Remus let out a deep sigh of relief. Pulling away, you look at him with gentle scrutiny, knowing what a toll last night took on him. "You look awful. Did you walk far? You should've told me you were coming. I could have met you."

Remus shakes his head. "I caught a train and apparated most of the way."

"Stop fussing over him, y/n. Let the poor man get past the door."  Sirius's teasing voice calls out from behind you; no doubt his canine ears allowed him to hear the familiar voice even through the closed bedroom door and knew it was safe to come down.

The two men embrace; this encounter being much more relaxed than their last. No Peter, no warranted need for revenge, no threat of execution.

As you all stand in your living room, a haunting thought hits you: you three are it, the last of your true friends. Peter is the traitor. You suppress a shudder, swearing to make the most of this moment.

"You know," you say with a grin, "I happen to have a large bottle of firewhisky. Fancy a drink, boys?" Sirius's grin mirrors your own. Remus has a small tentative smile, but it's all the encouragement you need to send you to the kitchen to fetch the bottle.

The small, quaint kitchen appears even smaller with the disregarded dishes from breakfast still sitting out on your table. The sight causes a small frown to appear on your face. All the rest of the morning and most of your afternoon had been lost to the unplanned nap with Sirius. You fill your sink with soap and hot water. A few flicks of your wand and your dirty dishes are submerged in the water, scrubbed, and rinsed. The process begins again as now clean plates make their way to the drying rack, which is concerning because you dont believe you cast a spell for that. Confused, you turn to see Remus in the kitchen. He winks and wordlessly reaches your top cabinet without so much of a stretch to retrieve the bottle of firewhisky. You follow him back to the livingroom, toting three glasses.

"Cheers to freedom," you say once everyone has a full glass, "and to being reunited with old friends."

"You hear that, Remus? She thinks we're old." You roll your eyes good naturedly. Remus rests a hand on Sirius's shoulder, giving it a brotherly pat. "We are old," he says simply, before all three of you raise your glasses to your lips, sipping at the burning liquid. You each settle comfortably in your living room. Remus sits in the armchair, leaving the overstuffed couch for Sirius and you. You sit at an end, while he opts for the middle seat, but in a respectable distance of your space. The bottle of alcohol sits in arms reached on the coffee table.

"I thought you swore off this stuff y/n." Remus says with a twinkle in his eye as he takes another drink from his glass. "You know, considering your history with it.." You groan and Sirius throws his head back in laughter.

"I almost forgot," Sirius says breathlessly from laughing. "Was that seventh year?"

"Sixth. Just before we got together. I suppose I was trying to impress you," you tell him.

"You matched me drink for drink that night."

"Which was mad seeing how I never had a drink before. I spent all next morning and afternoon in bed, throwing up. It was awful."

"You're forgetting the best part," Remus interjects.

"Dancing on top of that old table in the Shrieking Shack, singing the chorus of "Rock and Roll all Nite" at the top of my lungs was far from the best part. I only wish I could forget it."

"That wasn't singing, love. More like cats dying," Sirius quips while he and Remus laugh. You say nothing, well aware how accurate the description fits. You take a long drink from your glass.

"Yes, well as, uh, entertaining as that moment was, I wasn't referring to it," says Remus. You look at him questioningly. "Have you forgotten sneaking into the Slytherin boys' dorm, stealing all their robes, turning them hot pink, changing the crest to a mountain troll, and then returning them to the dorm?"

"Oh,  Merlin. That was the same night wasn't it? James had never been so keen on lending me his invisibility cloak until I concocted that plan!" The two men laugh and you join in.

"You know most of my other friends thought I was strange for being into muggle music." You say as the laughter dies down.

"Lily shouldn't have?" Sirius asks after he swallows his drink.

"No. You're forgetting Lily and I weren't friends first. We didn't really talk or hang out until she and James started dating."

"That's right. I forgot. I remember the two of you constantly together."

"Because we bonded over you two idiots. Prior to that, she never came out and said it, but I think she thought I was daft hanging around you lot most of the time. The other girls were more forgiving, but they had crushes on you all." You give a careless shrug. It was no secret how sought after the boys had been in their schooldays.

"I never quite understood how you became friends with us," Remus says.

"It was easy with you. You were so nice, calm, dependable, and not obnoxious. Peter…" you pause, choosing words carefully, not wanting present feelings to influence memories. "He was quiet and lonely. Pretty much agreeable. Again, easy. James and Sirius? I was determined to never speak to either after that boat ride our first night."

"We saved your life that night!" Sirius interjects.

"You two were the reason it needed saving! Standing up in a fucking boat because you two saw whatever in the lake. James knocking me overboard in the process."

"It was a giant squid and we rescued you."

You roll your eyes. "I was drenched, freezing and completely mortified. And as apologetic as James was, he kept calling me the wrong name." You all laugh. 

"It wasn't until second year that I thought they might be okay. We had already become friends," you say looking at Remus. "I missed about a week of classes due to acute bronchitis. You spent time with me afterwards, helping me catch up. When you missed later that month, I was ready to return the favor."

Remus nods, remembering the time fondly. "You were an excellent note taker. Much better than the other three."

"Did you even take notes?" You ask with a playful glance to Sirius.

"In second year? Probably not." He grins ever so cheekily. You shake your head, but are smiling.

"So we became friends and you befriended James and Sirius by default?" Remus muses.

Sirius feigns hurt. "Are you implying we were some sort of consolation prize?"

"Actually," you interject, "They saved me once again. A group of four older boys were harassing me, just dumb taunts and knocking my books out from my hands. They came right over, not caring about being outnumbered. Got the gits to leave me alone. James finally learned my name and I realized Potter and Black weren't so awful after all."

"Those guys were jerks. It didn't sit well with us to see anyone bullied like that."

"Unless of course it was Snape," you counter.

"That was different," Sirius's free hand clenches into a fist as he takes a hard drink.

Remus is quick to change the subject. "Do you still have that remembrall?"

"The one we enchanted to go red only for James? Mhm! It's at my flat in the city."

"Do you mean our flat?" Sirius asks.

Your smile falters. "No. Sirius. I got a different place. After…everything. It was too hard."

A deafening silence falls. Each of you taking long sips from your glasses.

"Oh!" You jump up suddenly, which given your somewhat inebriated state is not the brightest idea. You stumble slightly, but Sirius steadies you, grabbing you by your hips. His fingers linger and your eyes meet. You lose yourself; for a moment you're sixteen again and his touch is more intoxicating than the alcohol. His gaze tells you he feels the same.

Remus clears his throat loudly before taking a drink from his glass.

"Thanks," you mumble, setting your glass on the table.

Sirius releases you from his grasp, though you still feel the ghost of his touch. "'Tis no trouble, darling." You sense his eyes on you as you disappear from the room, heading upstairs. Your head is buzzing, but you blame that on the alcohol…

You return downstairs to the living room, the fetched item tucked securely out of sight under your arm, and find the boys, men talking with easy smiles. It makes you so happy to witness and spend this time together. Your presence has their full attention.

"Follow me, please." You fill your glass with more firewhisky. Sirius mimics the gesture and offers Remus a refill, but he just shakes his head no and silently indicates to the liquid still in his glass. You grab your wand and lead your little group outside to the backyard. The sun sits low in the west, the sky becoming more plum and black than pink and gold. Buckbeak sits on the ground near your shed, one wing tucked over its head.

You hand Sirius your wand and then produce his prisoner robes. He laughs and even Remus looks as if he approves. Sirius waves your wand and the dingy, tattered garment is set ablaze. 

After a while, you all make your way back inside. You prepare a light dinner and the eating and drinking continue with more laughs and shared memories. Hours pass. The contents of the bottle nearly drained signal the night coming to an end.

"I'm one drink away from dancing on tabletops and singing, or, screeching some A-ha, or something equally as embarrassing." you laugh. "I'm going to bed. Remus, I offered Sirius your room, but you're welcome to the couch. There are blankets and pillows in the hall closet." 

"Thank you, y/n. But I should be going."

"What? No. Stay. I insist. I need to see your bemused face sipping tea when I come downstairs with a bloody hangover and you're just fine."

Remus grins. "I hate depriving you both of such a moment, but I have an appointment tomorrow morning. I've already rented a room." You frown but don't press the issue any more. "Though if you don't mind, I thought I'd travel by floo."

"Of course. Help yourself. Powder is on the mantle." You hug him close and kiss his cheek. You excuse yourself, giving the other two time to say goodbye.

As you head for the bathroom, you pause hearing their low voices.

"I'm so sorry, old friend, for believing you... betrayed them. I should have known better. I-"

"There's nothing to forgive. I doubted you, too. The war made us all fear the worst.."

Mentally, you chastise yourself for eavesdropping and begin washing your face.

Sirius has made his way upstairs. In passing his room, you say goodnight. You're about to close the door to your bedroom when he calls your name and you turn to see him stepping towards you. Without warning his lips crash down on yours. Your fingers intertwine in his dark curls at the nape of his neck as you let the kiss deepen. His hands grip your waist and he hoists you up off your feet with little effort just as he did many times all those years ago. Your legs wrap themselves around his waist as he carries you to your bed. He drops you gently and only breaks the kiss to look at you. Still hovering over you, his gray eyes search your face for the answer to an unasked question. You nod in response, but he continues to gaze at you longing to hear you say it.

"I want you."

A slow breath of relief leaves him and his mouth finds its way back to yours. 

The night ends with two former lovers once again completely losing themselves in a perfect moment.

//

There's an unspoken understanding that the night you and Sirius shared together was more than a drunken hookup after a long night of reminiscing. But you don't repeat the night, though you share your bed with him. Nights are hard for him. Sleep doesn't always come easy and he often wakes in the middle of the night screaming, or panicked with sweat pouring off his body. But your presence brings him a comfort he can't otherwise achieve. And so, you spend your night together in your bed. Sleeping.

As days turn into weeks, a comfortable routine has set. Remus visits about once a week. Surprisingly, Sirius has taken to caring for your garden. You go into town as needed and you and Sirius cook dinner together most nights. Buckbeak, now known as Witherwings per a letter from Hagrid that reached Sirius, roams your yard freely, occasionally taking flight in the safety of the countryside night skies, always returning by daybreak. As precautions for the hippogriff and Sirius you casted Protego totalum over the cottage and yards. 

During this time together, Sirius learns how you took over your parents' shop*, how you've taken on a promising young woman who mostly looks after it, leaving you to spend more time here at the cottage, which also belonged to your parents. With tears in your eyes, you told him how they died months apart just over two years ago. He comforted you, remembering them both fondly and told you they'd be proud of you.

The day is still young when you tell him you have to go to the shop to take inventory. Before you leave you call out to him.

"Since it looks like rain, can you please go through some of your things in the attic?"

"Yes, dear," he uses the term mockingly and you playfully glare back at him.

"Try not to burn the place down while I'm gone." With that, you close the door behind you.

It's late afternoon when you return home. Sirius is waiting for you. A midnight blue box in his hand.

"Will you marry me, y/n?"

*a/n: I kept this vague so you can imagine a shop that fits your personality/likes/whatever. I'll only specify this later if needed for storylines. I wanted something where you could be allotted time off easily. Personally I imagine maybe an apothecary? Or maybe an antique shop. What about you?

2: I'm thinking of writing a prequel? More like blurbs, highlighting moments between you and Sirius. But I need to know what you want to read. First engagement? First kiss? When Sirius realizes he's in love? Time at Hogwarts? Post Hogwarts but pre Azkaban?

Taglist <3:  @oingo233 @marimorena06 @medalloway-blog

[words-for-holland]

Happier (8) | T.H.

Summary: Tom, Harrison & Harry have a talk about Y/N. Our broken up couple has their first physical conversation with each other. Natalie has a little talk with a certain someone. Does another truth unfold?

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9

Masterlist

A/N: To the readers, thank you for all the support! More drama to come!

Confrontation

No one likes it, but sometimes it’s needed to get a point across. Another use, to threaten another and instill fear, but we’ll get to that when we cross that bridge.

Harrison and Harry settled Tom down in the kitchen, ready to confront him about everything that’s happened. Tom fidgets with his fingers, unsure of what’s to come. All he knew, was he was furious that they both went to see Y/N, and didnt tell him. “Look”, Tom starts off, clearly impatient waiting on their prepared speech. “I just want to know why you left to see Y/N and didn’t tell me. Why am I being kept in the dark with everything?”

“Becuse you couldn’t figure it out. Even after being baby fed the information.” Harry says abruptly, his arms crossed as he stared down at his brother

Tom scoffs at the response, rolling his eyes. “How can I figure anything out when you all keep it a secret from me?! Mind you that all of this involves MY girlfriend and OUR relationship! And you have the balls to go out to find Y/N in secret and not tell me because I cant figure out a fucking thing in this chaotic fucking mess?!” Tom rants out, eyes and voice filled with anger and jealousy. He wasn’t sure if his yelling was towards the boys or if it was more toward himself, because deep down Tom knew he should have tried harder, but didn’t.

“No. Don’t you dare turn this on us, and make us look like we’re the bad guys.” Harrison snaps as he looks down at his best mate. “Just because you don’t know half the things that are going on, doesn’t mean you can be mad at us. Even when the words are written in stone, you’re still a complete div to not be able to comprehend it.”

“I dont understand.” Tom mutters as he looks at the table, trying his hardest to figure all this out. He had already talked to Natalie days ago about Kate and the pictures, but said she had nothing to do with it. They couldnt possibly mean there was more to the story other than Natalie being a complete piece of work.

“Read the fucking signs, Tom!” Harrison yells out. “I know you talked to Y/N that night about Kate and what did you say?”

Tom looks up at him, realizing what this is about. It wasn’t just about the pictures. It was more than that, something Tom should have realized and reacted to the moment it happened. “I said I was sorry and didn’t know what to say.” He mutters, his face now displaying a sense of guilt. “Fuck!” He whispers.

“Yeah start crying about it now you div!” Harry comments roughly, before continuing his speech. “Kate didn’t just backstab Y/N. She went behind the both of you. She was the spark that ruined your relationship, and you don’t know what to say to that?”

Tom shakes his head, realizing his mistake. For someone that works to display his emotions on screen, he failed miserably when it came to real life situations. It was miscommunication for him, the boys, and Y/N. In his mind, he was more pissed that Y/N was left there to think that he didnt care as much when in actuality he cared a lot. More than anyone would ever know, he cared the most. “No you all don’t understand that wasn’t my intention. Fuck!” He screams in frustration.

“Really and what was your intention then?” Harrison questioned, sarcastically intrigued to know Tom’s excuse.

“She lost her best friend. Fuck, she lost the only other person in her childhood that stood up for her, before this whole bullshit. That right there was more important than our relationship. I know shes the reason I got into this PR mess, the runors exploding, and pushed Y/N away fron me, but Kate betrayed Y/N’s friendship and trust. I didn’t say shit because I didnt want to make it about us. I wanted it to be about her and what she needed.” Tom spilled out, sighing deeply. Silence filled the air, and neither spoke for a minute, sinking in everything that’s happened.

“What she needed was you, Tom.” Harry said as both he and Harrison made their way out the kitchen, not until leaving Tom with a final warning. “We get that Kate maybe the reason she started all of this....but that doesn’t mean it ends with her.”

It left Tom wondering. Again, he had just talked to Natalie about the whole blackmail pictures but said she had nothing to do with it. Then again, she always wanted him to push away from Y/N. A talk he hoped would clear some answers, only left him with more questions. He knew who he had to talk to if he wanted straight answers, and she was going to give them whether she liked it or not.

Y/N had managed to avoid Tom the first week of her return in London. Sadly, it could only be said for that one week, and she had no one to thank, but a sink filled with dirty dishes to wash. Tom made his way into the kitchen by chance to grab sa quck bite to eat when he saw Y/N. It was his chance, he had to take it. It was now or never.

As he walked in, he made eye contact with her to which she responded with a slight smile and a nod. It was silent, nothing but the clashes of dishes and water running. “Do you want some help?” Tom asked with a smile. Might as well make the first move, he was a gentleman after all.

Y/N nodded as she handed him a dish towel, implying for him to dry and stack the dishes away while she washed. They continued this routine for a while, until Tom couldn’t take it anymore. “What happened to us Y/N? We were never like this in person. Hell the phone conversations we had the past weeks are more lively than this.” He confesses as he looks into her eyes.

Y/N shakes her head as she returns to her dishes. “There’s just nothing to say anymore. We’ve said everything we needed to say....Now things are just clockwork.”

“That’s not true. I know you still are keeping things from me. There’s more to this than Kate...” He waits for her to answer, but judging from the hesitation and the look of fear that dwelled in her eyes, his assumption was correct.

“You want to know everything?” Y/N asks as she looks in his eyes.

“Yes. I want to help you. I want us to be back to where we used to be before you left.”

Y/N sniffles as she shakes her head. “We can’t.”

“Why not?” He asks softly, hoping she will open up.

Y/N looks at Tom, taking a deep breath before she decides to tell him. She thought of the possibilities and the consequences that would come about. Kate was gone but it didnt mean Unknown wasn’t still out there. Everything had been so quiet the past few days, it almost seemed like she could breathe without having someone threaten her. Then again maybe her subconcious was right. Maybe it wasn’t a person anymore...Maybe it was just her.

Her mind wandered to Tom, who was staring at her waiting patiently for her story. Opening up her mouth, would be unleashing Pandora’s box and all hell could break loose. Blackmail, shattered dream, shattered relationship, broken trust, it would all come to the surface. The worst part...it wouldnt just stop there. But in this moment, Y/N didnt care. She had kept things bottled up from him for as long as she had. He deserved to know, he was a part of this as much as everyone. Maybe if Y/N kept Tom at bay, it would just be enough to statisfy Unknown and keep things as they were. Safe.

“Before I left...” Y/N starts off, her lower back leaning against the sink, eyes looking down as she lets out a deep sigh. “ There were already rumors of you and Natalie. Speculations that you’d be an item.”

“And you believed that?” Tom interrupts, his eyes rolling, unamused by how the story was starting. “Y/N if you were just jealous. Why didn’t you just say —“

“You think I didn’t know that?” Y/N fires back, scowling her eyes towards Tom, only to receive a knowing look from him that indicated to stop lying to herself. “Whatever. Yeah maybe I was a little when I saw how close you two got and how it just built the rumors. Did I want to tell you? Sure, but that didnt mean I could.”

“Im not following.” Tom comments, his messy eyebrow raised in confusion. “So you wanted to tell me..but couldn’t?”

Y/N nods, taking in another deep breath. “As the days went by, I started getting unknown text messages. At first they started off vague, saying how I didn’t belong with you. Look how much happier you were with Natalie. Did he ever do that with you? Did he ever smile at you like that? I bet he doesn’t love you anymore.”

Y/N’s eyes water as she relived the conversations, small sniffles escaping her nose. Tom was at a loss for words. He couldn’t for the life of him understand why someone would text complete lies to her. He was getting mad by the second as he heard each insulting sentence that came out of her mouth. “Y/N..” he says.

She shook her head as she continued. “But the insults started to become threats. They knew everything about me and was willing to use you as blackmail. If I didn’t breakup with you...they’d make sure you’d never live out your dream again. And for the life of me I wasn’t going to let that happen.” She cried, hiding her sobbing face in hands.

Tom quickly rushes to her, taking away her hands so he could look into her eyes. He held her close, cradled her tiny body into his arms as she tried to slow her breathing. “Then I found out Kate was behind the pictures and the start of the rumors, and now we’re here. I don’t know what to do anymore Tom. Everything’s just been so fucked up.”

“Hey, its okay. Im okay. I’m not gonna let them hurt you like this.” He cooed. “I dont give a fuck if it ruins my career or not. I care about you. You come first, that’s not going to change. But it’s over now, right? Let’s just move on from it. Ill break the PR, I’ll make sure Kate doesn’t walk away from this without serious consequences, I wont keep you a secret if it means it’ll fix everything.”

Y/N pushes away from Tom, reluctantly. She knew how much he cared for her. He was willing to risk everything just to make sure they would be okay, and in a perfect world, maybe that would have been enough. Could live happily ever after and not have to worry about anything anymore. Both could just walk away from it all if they wanted, but this wasn’t a perfect world. “Just because Kate started it, doesn’t mean it’s over. Unknown could still be out there.” She whispers, afraid of anyone listening.

“Then we find out. Together.” He responds, holding her hand. “I let you slip away once. Im not letting it happen again.”

He looked into her eyes, almost silently asking to hug her once more. Two embrace each other, and stay like that for a while. It had been so long since they felt this sort of comfort, which brought up a familiar and warm feeling for each them. So warm, so familiar...they almost didn’t want to let go. Y/N breathed into him, taking in his cologne, the one she had grown to love over the three years. It felt right. It was home.

But not all moments can last forever. Behind the thin walls was Natalie, who had overheard and seen the entire conversation. Hearing Tom, mention how he’d break the PR for Y/N and how he’d do anything, risk everything to find Unknown, rubbed her the wrong way. The way Tom held Y/N close, made Natalie furious, and as soon as she heard her phone ring, she answered. “He knows you exist.”

“A slight hiccup. He’s so caught up in Y/N, he just can’t see the real you.” The voice reassured. “Dont worry, he’ll love you when she’s out of the picture.”

“There is no out of the picture anymore. You should have heard him...He wont let her go this time.” Natalie answers, discouraged more than ever.

“Then we just have to up the antics. Clearly her dim-witted friend ruined the original plan. Thats the last time I ever trust an American do the dirty work. She can start a fire but can’t be beothered to finish a job. ” The voice scoffs. “If the messages don’t work, threaten her in person. Alone. Make sure Tom doesn’t see you.” The voice orders.

“You know it wont work. She’s not as afraid as she was before.” Natalie whispers as she continues to watch them from a distance.

“Then we’ll give her something to be afraid of. Why do you doubt me?” The voice asked, challenging Natalie. “Is this what you wanted?”

Natalie hesitates. Of course she wanted Tom more than anything in the world, but to what point? To what cost? These questions swirled around her mind as she thought back to how Y/N and Tom interacted in the kitchen. Their bond was so strong, they always found a way back to each other. For a moment...she felt almost bad. “Of course I want Tom.” She answers “but.. I want him to love me the way he loves Y/N.”

The voice scoffs at her response.loud enough for Natalie to hear the disgust in her voice. “Haven’t I taught you anything? Love is superficial gets you nowhere in life. You’re lucky enough that we’re settling for Tom.”

“I...I guess.”

“Then you’ll make sure Y/N stays away. Im doing this for you Natalie. Fame, fortune, your career, and your superficial love life. I want what’s best for you.” The voice becomes calmer more gentle, yet the sinisterness was still very present.

“Yes...mother.” Natalie says sourily.

“Darling, how many times have I told you to only refer to me as your publicist? Now go, before someone finds out about this.” The line drops, and Natalie focuses her eyes on Y/N who leaves for her room. Her eyes narrow, and fill with jealously and guilt. Her mother’s words replying her mind. “He will love you...just get rid of the girl.”

Taglist:

@hollanddolanfangirl @ifilosemyselfagain @hevjadams @averyfosterthoughts​ @fangirl-with-a-mission @drishtisikarwar @eridanuswave​ @ifntelyinspirit @trumpettay @astridcommings @parkershoco @racewife2004 @sleepybesson @greatpizzascissorstaco @andievgs @joyleenl @holland-bowen @in-a-lot-of-fandoms-tbh @viwihere @marvelobsessedteenager

[shadowheartssimp]

pc/shadowheart (another modern au fic help) sub 3k words.

-- x -- 1:21 am - 1 new message

Xildi groggily reaches out to her buzzing phone, only a little peeved that something so easily broke her from her trance. With a sigh she gazes at the awfully bright screen and finds herself frowning before her mind can even process. She doesn’t even get to unlock her phone before another message comes in.

1:23 am - 2 new messages

Sitting up straighter, she finally unlocks her phone.

2 messages from Shadowheart

1:21am → 

hey, are you awake

1:23am → 

youre probably trancing

With a sigh, Xildi weighs her options before realizing there’s not exactly one. Her fingers move fast as she types her reply.

1:24am ← 

I’m ‘awake’ now. What’s wrong?

1:25 am →

i didnt say anything was wrong

1:26 am →

you assumed that

Xildi rolls her eyes before looking back down to her phone.

1:27 am →

anyways

Moments pass, and the elf is torn whether or not she wants to return to her trance. She wonders how pissed Shadowheart would be if she accidentally left her on read, and decides that it’s likely not worth finding out.

1:31 am ←

Shadowheart?

1:31 am ← 

You’re making it seem like something’s wrong.

Most likely because something is wrong, but getting the half-elf to admit that is half the battle. Huffing, Xildi shuffles off the bed and begins traversing to her kitchen. Might as well get a snack if she’s about to be up all night waiting for whatever is wrong with her friend. 

Her phone buzzes as she’s prepping a light snack for herself, at least signaling that Shadowheart didn’t pass out on her. Scratch wakes as well, trotting into the kitchen and wagging his tail in hopes for a midnight snack as well.

1:38 am → 

someone from the orphanage contacted me today

1:38 am → 

i didnt want to even message you but idk

1:39 am →

unfortunately you know my past

Xildi rolls her eyes, it wasn’t her fault that Shadowheart blabbed it out when she was drinking too much wine at Wyll’s party. Either way, the story did already peak her interest and Xildi found herself approaching her couch with warm toast.

1:40 am ← 

The orphanage? I thought you told them to never contact you again.

1:41 am →

i did

1:41 am →

that’s why its bothering me

Quizzically Xildi bites on her toast.

1:42 am ←

Wait… you didn’t answer? Are you telling me they called and you let them go straight to voicemail?

1:43 am → 

and? i didnt want to be reminded of that awful place

1:44 am → 

i dont want to listen to it

1:44 am →

at least alone. im coming over

Xildi blanches. She’s coming over, now? She’s hardly well dressed for visitors, practically in her underwear and hair a mess. Not to mention that the place was in an array (not really, but in her eyes it was a pigsty that couldn’t be seen by anyone else’s eyes).

1:45 am ← 

Now?! Seriously? Couldn’t you wait until morning?

1:45 am ←

Shadowheart, my place is a mess.

1:46 am →

yes. now. 

It starts processing in her head. Shadowheart doesn’t live far, perhaps 15 minutes minimum if she takes the bus, but there aren’t any at this hour. At least she’s pretty sure there’s none.  So she’s walking, that gives her probably an extra 10 minutes. Then she’s reminded of how incredibly dangerous that is to begin with -- but it’s Shadowheart and she likely doesn’t care to begin with. She grew up in this neighborhood, this is nothing!

1:48 →

i need you

Oh. Xildi knows her cheeks are warm, because never has Shadowheart ever been so forward. A heavy breath leaves her lips as she knows she has no choice now but to let her come over and likely listen to this voice mail with her. Whatever comes afterward will be another story she’s sure.

1:50 am ←

The door’s unlocked, please be safe getting here.

1:51 am →

im fine

1:52 am →

but youre sweet to worry

Frantically Xildi shoves the now cold toast into her mouth and begins cleaning at an incredible pace. She starts with the kitchen, disturbed that she even let there be dirty dishes to begin with. A few minutes later and she’s drying her hands, curiously peaking over at her phone to see if anything else has come through. Thankfully nothing and she sets off for her bedroom.

It only takes a few more minutes to tidy up before she goes back to retrieve her phone. 

1 new message from Shadowheart

2:04 am →

bitch’zel stopped me on my way. im omw now

Xildi purses her lips, it was awfully late for Lae’zel to be out and about. Now that she thinks upon it, she does recall Astarion’s door closing roughly ten minutes or so ago. Interesting. 

2:05 am ←

Any chance there’s a bus going at this hour?

2:06 am →

already ahead of you

2:06 am → 

last bus of the night… guess im staying at your place again

2:07 am ←

Glad I cleaned my room then :/

2:07 am → 

how kind! bold of you to think id actually sleep with you though

Xildi feels her heart strings pull at that one. 

2:07 am →

well…

2:08 am →

perhaps a discussion for another night

Dropping her phone onto the bed, Xildi falls back and stares up at her ceiling. She’s already on a roller coaster of emotions, she can’t imagine what must be barreling through Shadowheart at the moment. Scratch trots into her room, whining slightly before laying on the floor by the foot of her bed. 

Her phone buzzes again and she lazily reaches across her bed to find it. She doesn’t even get a chance to look at the screen before it drops on her face with a defiant thud. Groaning she picks it off her face and squints at the bright device.

2:14 am →  

or i guess you dont want to talk about it

2:14 am ←  

I do.

2:15 am → 

😤😤 good

Xildi finds herself laughing and lowers her phone onto her chest. 

2:18 am ←

Do you have an ETA?

2:19 am →

excited to see me?

2:19 am →

bout five minutes though

Xildi decides that staring aimlessly at her ceiling is her best way to waste time, not finding energy to do much else. She knows Shadowheart arrives when the door creaks open slowly, and Scratch jumps from his spot on the floor and sprints out of the room. She can hear the light grunt from the half-elf as the dog nearly knocks her over, a fragile laugh echoing the silence as claws scratch along the wooden floor.

It thankfully doesn’t take long for Scratch to settle, Xildi notes from the sudden silence. There are light steps, from both the dog and Shadowheart as they approach her room and the elf gradually rises herself into a more approachable position. Finally their eyes meet in the dim room and she can just tell how worn Shadowheart is.

“Hey,” comes lightly from Xilid as she offers a faint smile. She figures if anything she should try to be welcoming. 

Something close to a response comes from Shadowheart who sulks into the room, dropping her backpack on the way. She practically falls face first onto the bed and lets out what Xildi assumes is a much needed breath.

Tentatively, the elf places a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

“Do you want to change first?”

“I guess.”

So it was going to be a difficult night -- morning? Xildi isn’t sure anymore. Gradually Shadowheart rises from her spot and keeps her gaze away from the elf, absolutely avoiding the pressing matter on hand. The tension stays thick as she digs through her backpack and eventually pulls some sweats out.

Pointendly looking away, Xildi focuses on the ceiling once more as Shadowheart changes. A few quiet moments pass before the mattress shifts and the half elf hesitantly lays down next to her. Now two sets of eyes focus on the white popcorn.

Shadowheart is silent for a long time -- long enough that the elf fears that she has fallen asleep. Just when she’s about to ask, she hears Shadowheart say “I don’t even know if I want to hear what they have to say.”

Xildi shifts her gaze to a troubled Shadowheart who still casts her hard stare to the ceiling. “Do you think you’d be better not knowing?”

“No,” comes first, followed shortly by “I don’t know”.

Finally dark green eyes meet Xildi, ones filled with exhaustion and definitely some fear. The elf can’t help but wonder of all the horrors her friend(?) grew up with in that orphanage. “I could always listen to it, so you don’t have to.”

“And hold it against me?”

“You know I wouldn’t do that.”

Something close to a soft smile eases its way onto Shadowheart’s face, scooting closer and resting her cheek on Xildi’s shoulder. The half-elf’s phone does a light drop on her stomach, almost as an invitation before she sighs. 

Taking the hint, the elf lifts Shadowheart’s phone and goes to unlock it. Truthfully it felt wrong to be even doing that, but she figured if she didn’t there was no way in hell Shadowheart would. A light mutter from her side tells her the passcode that she already secretly knows from another drunken night, and she quickly exits her messages before seeing something she might not meant to be. 

Hell, she shouldn’t be navigating her phone to begin with. 

Her thumb taps the phone app and she feels Shadowheart tense against her, digits gripping her arm. “We could always listen to it later.”

“No,” says Shadowheart as she glares at her own phone. “I didn’t come all this way to continue ignoring it.”

With a slow nod, Xildi continues and clicks on the voicemail tab. She’s only a little surprised to see a few from Gale and Wyll, from today even, but ignores it for the sake of seeing the number sticking out like a thumb between it all. Tentatively she glances to the woman beside her, who holds a fierce look before she taps the number to play the voicemail. 

It starts casual enough, the shuffling of papers, stating who is calling and stating that they were looking for, yes indeed, Shadowheart. To this day Xildi is shocked that they truly messed up her birth certificate that badly. Just when they’re both thinking that the call is a fluke, that they’re trying to bait her back into calling without anything, they hear: “Please call us back when you can, we believe we might have found information about your parents.”

It clicks.

Shadowheart is still, terrifyingly so.

Xildi glances from the phone in her hand, to Shadowheart who is practically cuddling her side, to her white popcorn ceiling. Even she is unsure if it’s the truth or a white lie to get back in communication with her.

“I hate them,” comes quietly from Shadowheart, who’s biting so hard on her lip that blood dares to drip. “I hate them so much.”

Xildi remains quiet, completely and utterly unsure of how to proceed with this new information. A part of her feels that she shouldn’t have just heard this voicemail. She can only imagine how Shadowheart would have handled the news alone. Poorly, if she really has to guess.

Said woman exhales loudly, her grip on Xildi’s arm tightening before gradually loosening. Her breath is fragile for a moment, teetering on the edge of likely tears -- the elf doesn’t dare to look -- before mellowing out to an extent. She shifts slightly before sitting up and crossing her legs. 

“I don’t even know if I want to meet them.”

Her voice is so fragile, unlike herself, that it takes Xildi by surprise. She’s sitting up faster than she can imagine and wastes no time placing a hand over Shadowheart’s own. The very least she can do right now is be supportive. “You don’t have to any time soon.”

Briefly the half-elf tenses from the touch. “They left me there.”

“Sometimes there’s not a choice,” says Xildi with a frown, remembering her own past all too well. She wonders if her brothers are still well even after all this time. “Even so, because of that it led to us meeting, right?”

“Look at you, trying to make this positive,” scoffs Shadowheart, but the faintest of smiles shines. Their eyes lock for a few seconds and the same butterfly feeling stirs in Xildi’s stomach. “It’s crazy how one even can change everything. That orphanage was shit, but it led me to Shar -- something to believe in.”

“Are you thinking how things might’ve been different if you grew up with them?”

Shadowheart tilts her head. “My parents? A little,” pursing her lips, she gazes intently at the wall behind Xildi. “I hate that they left me in that awful place, never once tried to get in contact with me. And now I despise that the orphanage is trying to bring me back.”

“You don’t have to go, or even call back.” With a reassuring smile, Xilid takes her hand back and runs it idly through her hair. “If you’re happy where you are, why change it?”

The half elf pauses, as if Xildi’s words struck her like a bolt of lightning. Her gaze shifts from the wall to her lips, then to her eyes. “Would you change anything?”

“Me?” A bit baffled, Xildi raises a brow before shrugging it off. “A few things here and there sure, but I suppose it’s often better to let destiny take its course.”

“You think us meeting is destiny? That’s cute.”

Xildi gives Shadowheart a look, despite it all there’s something deeper that she’s not inherently saying. It gives her an inkling that somewhere inside, she’s actually agreeing with her -- and that they should continue letting it. Her heart skips in her chest, unsure whether to take the advance before she manages a response. “Do you disagree?”

A long silence fills the air, as if Shadowheart is weighing her options carefully. What is likely only a moment or two feels like an eternity, dragging on and eating away at Xildi until finally -- finally! -- the bed shifts underneath Shadowheart’s weight and the woman is sitting next to her. Polished nails gently scratch at Xildi’s fingers before resting. “No, I don’t think so. In fact…” trailing off, Shadowheart uncharastically fails to meet Xildi’s gaze. “I think you should let it take its course, right now.”

Oh.

Mustering up all of her courage, Xildi leans forward and lifts her free hand, cupping one of Shadowheart’s cheeks. Her skin is warm and soft against her cool hands, a dull reminder of how chilly she prefers to keep her room. Her heart is pounding against her chest as she leans closer. She can see all of her eye lashes, how they begin to flutter nervously, and the dark hues of green in Shadowheart’s eyes. 

Her breath catches, perhaps the other’s too, before she sets her mind on it. Her chest practically explodes as she timidly presses her lips against Shadowheart’s, a full eruption of emotions consuming her as she suddenly gasps for air. How she frees her other hand to cup her other cheek, the need to feel incredibly close to her rising as her heart continues to pound. 

Shadowheart chuckles against her lips, the hot breath tickling her lips as she finds herself smiling. It’s not long before she goes again, parting her lips just enough to ensnare the half-elf’s lower lip. To feel how soft and full hers are against her own, the warmth that comes to her cheeks, face -- hell, her stomach too. All overwhelming but wonderful at the same time. She wasn’t aware how much she was craving this moment.

After what feels like an eternity (but definitely was a couple minutes at most), Xildi pulls herself away and shyly drops her hands to the bed. Her cheeks burn as she stares at a lopsided and completely goofy grin that stretches on Shadowheart’s face. Endearing? Absolutely.

“Perhaps… it was destiny -- us meeting that is.”

Xildi smiles. “Perhaps it was.”

[xmalereader]

Kylo Ren X Modern! Male Reader

1/2

-

|| Masterlist ||

-

Summary: Reader lives on earth, far away from Kylo Ren and somehow he is able to see him one day during kylos training, he feels the readers force and tries to search for him but can’t. So, in order to find him he has to talk to him through the force.

Warnings: Force Sensitive, bullying, soft Kylo, slight angst.

-

-

“Your shorter than I expected, but then again. I’m a little surprised on how someone like you can see me.”

He suddenly opens his eyes, waking up from the strange dream. He could hear the sound of chirping birds and the sun was shinning through his closed curtains. He turns his head to the left to see his alarm clock proped up on his nightstand. It read, 7:45AM. He doesn’t want to get up and he really doesn’t want to deal with anything or anyone today. He’s already struggling enough, what more could he go through?

“Y/n, it’s time to wake up!!” He hears his mother shout from downstairs. The older male groans in frustration and drapes the covers over his head, waiting for his mother to come and get him out of bed because their is no way in hell that he is leaving this amazing bed of his.

—

He groans once he’s forced down to sit on the dinning table with breakfast ready. “You were suppose to be up already, doctor said that you can’t over sleep when your on medication.” Said his mother as she walks around the kitchen, cleaning the dirty dishes and pots that she’s used the day before.

Y/n could only sigh and poke at his food. He wasn’t really hungry, he was never hungry in the mornings but yet again, he was always forced to eat something. “Is dad still in town?” He suddenly asks and shoved a forkful of food into his mouth, listening to the water run and his mother scrubbing off the disgusting food that stuck on the plates. “Yes, he’s still in town and I have to go too. So you stay out here in the country house and try to relax, remember the doctor said-“

“-said that I should spend some time out in nature to keep myself and my thoughts relaxed.” Y/n cuts in to finish off his mother’s sentence before leaning his head to the side and sighing again. “Can’t I just stay here alone without you or dad checking up on me daily? I’m a grown Man.”

“Twenty is an adult age but you don’t act like a grown man.” She cleans her hands and drys them off. She approached her son and reached out to gently stroke his hair, he could feel her trembling hands as he reached out to grab her by the wrist and gently push her hand away. “Just go to town with dad, I know that he needs you more than I do.” He whispered out.

He caught a glance of his mother’s smile but he avoids it.

“Please be careful and take your meds.” She says on last time before leaving the cottage, he hears the door lock and the sound of the car engine starting and driving down the road. Once the sound goes faint he stands up Harshly and grabs his plate full of food and dumps it into the trash can. He never eats his mother’s cooking or any of his parents cooking, he knows that they pour his medication into his food since he refused to take them awhile back. But now that he’s alone, they can’t stop him.

He makes sure to grab each bottle he finds around the house and empties them out into the sink with a frown on his face.

He was stuck here.

Ever since that voice came to his head it wouldn’t seem to go away and it was slowly making him go insane. Not physically but it was driving him crazy on just hearing that bickering voice speak to him, he’s tried many ways to cut it out but it always finds a way back in. He remembers when he told his parents and expected them to understand but that only worried them, causing him to meet up with a doctor and therapist.

They thought their son was losing his mind, which is why he’s stuck out here in the country side. His parents thought that it was best for him to stay away from the city and towns since he got into a fight with one of his college classmates for calling him crazy, he just lost it and suddenly attacked the poor kid but he didn’t regret it one bit.

His parents were keeping him locked away, they were afraid of him and yet they still try to help when he knows that theirs no way for him to get better.

Once he finishes dumping out all of his meds he tossed the rest of the empty bottles away. He makes his way around the cottage and heads upstairs to his own room to change properly and possibly go outside and take a walk around the woods.

“I Can sense you.”

Y/n was tying his shoes when he hears the voice again, causing him to freeze in place.

“But your too far away.”

He quickly shakes off the voice and brings up a wall that’ll block it out. He’s been teaching himself ways to keep the voice away and it’s worked a couple of times but his walls were never strong enough to hold.

He ignores the voice and finishes up with his laces before grabbing a jacket and rushing down the stairs, he makes sure to grab his phone and headphones before stepping outside.

The cottage was located on the out skirts of London. His father was born and raised here while his mother was born and raised in America, which leaves him. He was born in America but raised in London. He didn’t gain a heavy accent like his parents did and instead kept his mouth shut. He was the odd one of the family of three and he didn’t care, he was always alone and he’ll always be.

Once he plugs in his earbuds he starts to play some music, picking up a stick as he makes his way through the woods. He swings the stick around like a child would and continued to move up a small hill that lead him to a perfect view of the forest. He stood on top of the hill with a small smile on his face, the only thing he enjoyed in his life right now was this view. Everyday he would come up here only to relax and try and clear his thoughts if posible but today he somehow felt different. He felt a shift deep down inside of him, but what was it?

Y/n tosses his stick to the side and sighs. Listening to the music fade away into the background as he yanks off his earbuds and ticks them into his shirt. He enjoys the silence for a while.

“I can see you now.”

Y/n gasps and turns around to see a tall man all dress in black, he has his arms behind his back and he held a strong stern look. “Who are you?” He suddenly asks and slowly backs away from the stranger.

“You Can see me now, that’s good it took you awhile to clear that head of yours.”

The other chuckled nervously and shakes his head. “I’ve finally cracked, this is all in my head just my imagination.” He tells himself as he turns around to face away the man.

“This isn’t your imagination, this is real.” Said the dark tall Man. He was examining y/n, his eyes moved up and down his body and frowns. “I can only see you, but I can’t see your surroundings.”

“Are you supposed to see what’s around me?” Y/n asks and looks around, hoping that he was alone and that no one could see him talking to a stranger that could or could not be real. “Your strong enough to block out your surroundings.” He added which only left the other adult even more confused.

“Listen, I don’t know who you are and you don’t know who I am. Your just the voice in my head who’s finally taken a form to mess with me, I’ve already lost enough and I can’t let this continue on!” He shouts at him and reached out for his earbuds but notices that they are missing from his shirt. “What?”

—

“I need a location for this.” The supreme leader hands the earbuds to one of his generals and waits for them to analyze it. “What are your trying to find?” Asked general Hux as he stands next to Kylo with a frown on his face as the other waits for the results. “I may have found another force-senstive but he’s powerful. I tried to communicate with the scavenger girl but instead I was taken to someone else. He doesn’t know that he has the force.” He explains to Hux before tilting his head to the side, feeling the others concern about this strange young man that he’s suddenly stumbled upon. “Wherever he is from, we can bring him here and I can train him.” He finally says.

Before Hux could reply the other general comes back and hands the earbuds back to the supreme leader. “Sir, these come from a planet that doesn’t exist on our maps. It was erased many many years ago.” She says and bites her lip. “What is the planet?” He asks. “Earth, sir.”

“Earth? I’ve heard of that planet before is located far away from our solar system and it’s forbidden for us to cross their atmosphere. I heard that the people that live on that planet are considered weak and selfish. They dont know how to control anything.” Said Hux with a grin on his face. He watched as kylo stares at the strange earbuds and puts them inside his own pockets. “Set corse to earth and get my ship ready.” He orders to the general.

“Are you mad? These people dont know anything about the solar system and how there are more things out here. They’ll easily detect you.” Hux follows his leader around the finalizer. “Then let them know, ill only pick up the boy and come back.” He reached his quarters and watched as the door slides open. Hux stops and stands just outside the doorway. “I hope you know what you are doing.” He said before the doors close in front of him.

—

“I need new headphones.” Y/n tells his mother once she enters the cottage. “You what?” She tilts her head to the side in confusion and makes her way to the kitchen where she sets down the bags full of food. “My last ones broke and I need new ones, I dont care if they are the cheap ones I just need a pair to block out the voice...” he whispered the last part softly while avoiding her eyes. It’s been two years since he’s last made eye contact with his parents, he can feel their fear that he sometimes fears of even looking at them.

His mother sighs and placed a hand on her face in frustration. “Okay, I’ll go into town tomorrow and get you a new pair.” She says and turns back to put away the groceries. Y/n can only stand their and watch her work before he finally decides to speak up. “Why dont you go rest? I’ll put everything away.” He approached her and takes the bag from her hands and gave a small smile. She sighs sadly with a smile and nods, “Thank you darling.” She pats his shoulder and leaves the kitchen to allow him to work in silence.

Once she was gone, y/n began to take out everything from the bags and set them on the table so that he could easier and faster. “You seem to have a complicated relationship with your mother.”

Y/n gasps and jumps at the sudden voice. He turns around to see the same stranger standing in front of him this time. “Get out of my head.” He hisses out quietly not wanting his mother to hear him. The other chuckles and shakes his head. “I’m not in your head, you’re like an open book. You’re allowing me to see all of this.”

“What are you talking about?” Y/n walks pass him and began to put away the canned food into the cabinets. Trying to ignore the other, “You think that I’m a voice in your head but I’m not. This is real, its all real.” He held up y/n’s earbuds in his hand to show him that he wasnt hallucinating. “Where did you get those?” Y/n asks and reaches out to take them. Once his hand takes the earbuds back he feels the other brush his gloved fingers against his palm, causing him to flinch away. His eyes widen in fright. “How-?”

“I’m just like you.” He says.

Y/n licks his lips nervously and steps back. “If you aren’t an illusion than what are you?” He suddenly asks.

“I’m a human being like you; they call me Kylo Ren.”

Suddenly he’s froze in place with his eyes widen open as he thinks back to all of his previous dreams. He remembers seeing a man dressed in black, wearing a helmet and holding a sword that was a bright red color and it glowed. He could hear the crackling sound of the sword. He also remembers seeing multiple people dressed the same way. “The knights of ren.” He whispers out.

Kylo hears him speak those words and steps forward. “How do you know that?” He asks. How did y/n know about the knights of ren, he’s been trying to search for months and he hasn’t gotten anything from them yet. “I don’t, It was all a dream.” He replies back to kylo and grips his headphones in his hand and shakes his head. “I’ve been having dreams like that for days now but I tend to ignore it. It means nothing to me.” With that he turns back to putting away the groceries, once everything is away he makes sure that the kitchen is clean before he began to heat up some water for his tea.

“You can’t ignore these visions.”

“Visions?” Y/n laughs out and grabs a mug from the sink. “These aren’t Visions, they are dreams.” He states.

“In those visions, did you see yourself?” Kylo suddenly asks as Y/n stares out the window and sighs. “No, I only saw a group of people dressed in black while wealing weapons but there was one that held a very peculiar sword. It was red and it glowed, I remember hearing it turn on or something it was strange.” He shakes his head and hears the kettle go from. He walks over to the stove and removes the kettle from the hot surface and began to pour himself some tea. “But like I said they aren’t visions but dreams.” He turns around to see Kylo staring at him with a strange look on his face which only left the other staring back in confusion.

“What?”

Kylo slowly speaks. “You’re mother, she’s watching you.”

His eyes widen at the mention of his mother. He turns around in one quick motion to see her standing by the entrance of the kitchen. Her eyes were red and full of tears as she stared at her own son. “Mom...” he could feel her emotions.

She was fearing and she was upset, the man in front of her wasnt her son anymore but a stranger to her. “Mom?”

“She cant see me.” Said kylo which only worsened the situation for y/n. His mother jus taught him talking to no one which only makes things worse fo him. “You’ve lost it now.” She says all of a sudden causing y/n to flinch at her words.

[hellbabyfromhell]

why (if you don’t mind me asking) is your house taking such a large toll on your mental health? Im sure you’ve explained it already but... I’m out of the loop

i havent explained it, and tbh i didnt explain it to my friends fr a long time because i felt guilty AND embarrassed even though i should have just been madif you happen to know these people irl, i respectfully ask you dont share this with them. i need to speak to them at my own time in my own way. its long

basically my (then gf, now ex’s) fmaily “took me in” right after my dad traumatically died right in front of me and ruined my brain. i was all fucked up and they “took me in”. i felt very safe with them. but the way it ended up was with them  bleeding me dry with money because ive been  paying my ex’s rent since my dad died, and if you know me you know thats a long, long time. now, i felt that i owed it to them because they took care of me when my dad died, and that kept me from changing things despite everyone’s warnings, saying they were using and taking advantage of me. but they called me their daughter, they cared about me, i thought. but it really went downhill abruptly......it started with small disrespects. first off, i’m paying half the rent of this townhome for an uninsulated attic with no central air or heat on the third floor. it is alternatingly freezing and fucking makes-you-nauseous hot. this family tried to convince me that i had vents and they were just covered by my trash lol and thats why my attic is worth [REDACTED] (its too much). when i literally showed them the floor plans and there was no vent they basically just went Oh.

Then, they changed my name on the neflix account to my ex’s mom’s mom’s name, because there were too many people on the netflix to make a new profile, so they changed MY name, rather than rowan’s boyfriend or their random ass friend, ME, who pays HALF THE RENT AT THIS HOUSE. that seems petty but its like, im really the least important out of everyone?then came the thing that made me really start reviewing my situation:my ex asked to come over, and they said yes. THEY said yes. not me. this was like maybe a week or two max after we broke up. ex’s mom texted me to say “okay, he’s coming over” and i was like “:0( okay thats fine but i wish you’d told me before cementing down stuff because thats a little inconsiderate” and she was like “Well it would have been inconsiderate of me not to tell you at all.” I thought that was really disrespectful bcause like, they REALLY didnt know our situation at all, and i live on the third floor so if i needed something from the kitchen or something id have to walk past my ex because my ex and my ex’s mom wanted to be fucking friends. it was weird and rude and she would NOT budge on the idea of INVITING MY EX INTO MY HOME WITHOUT CONFIRMING WITH ME being rude!!!!!and then i started looking back, and likethis is one of the worst things, like a couple months after my dad died, i was like catatonic, barely present, sick with grief and majorly traumatized. and these people had me sel my father’s car, with everything in it, so that my ex could get a new car “to drive me around safer : )”...... now i have to BEG to get a ride down the street to baskin robbins unless someone themself needs something. i gave up my father’s car and everything inside of it for this, and they let me. at the time it hurt too much to look at but i wish with everything i could have what i left in that car. i will never forgive them for that. i have so  little of him and some of out favorite things were in that car and i know they knew that.ive mentioned moving out a couple times and they always say “well give 2 months notice!” done. i have. but they kept saying i needed to stay longer or convincing me it was bad to leave until the ex’s mom’s bf needed surgery and then now i cant leave till after january. i wasnt happy about this at all but i was like Okay well i guessbut then the other night, the ex’s mom’s bf (who has his own medical card) had the audacity to get mad at me for not wanting to get him a bunch vape carts from the dispensary i JUST got hired at even though id just bought a lot, AND HE WASNT SUPPOSED TO BE SMOKING!!!. he asked me a favor and i said i was uncomfy with it and he went fucking off on me. 

this is a little snippet. i know you dont know everything just from what im telling you, but what i can say i have done a TON for this family, and this is NOT the only thing he has asked me for, and i don’t know if the doctor prescribed him crack rock because all he does is sit in the living room and watch kill la kill. i was so disappointed in him because i thought he was least complicit and it turns out he hd some issue with me. i’ve done a lot for this family. it was really hurtful.since this i never leave my room, they rarely address me if i do or look right through me. the ex’s mom’s bf asked to speak once in a way that implied that he expected a sorry from me too. you ma believe this to be once sided, but i believe with my whole heart i have done not a thing wrong. i don’t want to apologize. it’s been about 5 weeks now i feel like and they have barely spoken to me. they laugh wildly downstairs and don’t feel even a bit bad that i never come downstairs. that i have to rush around to get packages. that i never use the kitchen or am anywhere near it (not that id want to be because its always stacked high with dirty dishes). my ex’s mom lost her job staying home too much from an illness that shouldnt affect her working since she works a desk job an all she does at home is sit on the couch, do nails, ply overwatch, watch safiya nyagaard and hang out with their friends. i never go downstairs because i feel like its not my home. also my ex’s mom’s bf walks around all hours of the night now so i never feel safe to go downstairs EVER so i ration water and food and when i go to te bathroom people jiggle the doorknob and i say IM IN HERE :0( and also my ex’s mom’s bf walks around puking with the door open  and blowing his nose (he did this pre surgery too) and i just am going crazy here i have to get out. they dont give a shit about me . i dont know if i sound entitled, but it really does suck but i feel so trapped. this isnt my house. OH , and when i sked about moving out ex’s mom said well if we all paid the same amoun it’d be [200 less] .  theyre using me and dont care and i hate being here and it’s making me really want to die. thank you, it kinda felt good to let that out

[cykelops]

sharing a WIP of my frank/matt fic because. i want to. this is unedited so theres definitely funny grammar stuff i dont want u to point out aslkdhskaldja

Matt stands on a water-logged plastic mat, protecting his feet from the moldy bathroom tiles, waiting hopelessly for the hot water to return. He's been forced into late showers, well past midnight, because the showerhead spits ice if anyone in the building so much as turns their faucet a fraction to wash the dishes or flush the toilet. Matt's senses helpfully provide him some perspective to diagnose the problem. In the apartment below him, it is the latter. He called his landlord when it first happened three weeks ago and the man has built a rap sheet of excuses for not fixing it ever since. Maybe Matt needs to remind him he's got a lawyer for a tenant. 

The cold water pricks him, little needles battering his skin. He grows numb to the feeling, focused instead on running the soft washcloth with purpose over his soapy skin. His training allows him to differentiate between important and irrelevant stimuli, blocking out anything that might overload his system. It is a useful alternative to curling up and crying because the shower is too loud and too cold as a man of his abilities might do without adequate control. 

Matt tilts his head back. Water hangs heavy on his thick lashes and drips down the curve of his cheek, following a trail to his collar and disappearing down to his hip. Despite the shivers rocking his body in subtle variation, the cold water feels good where he is sore and bruised. His body hurts in souvenirs of tonight's exertion-- from his mask-chafed scalp to the angry purple mark on his thigh that throbs every time his legs press together. It was a long one. Dawn can't find him on the streets, not today, but it was hard to tear himself away. A client needs him in the morning and he cannot fail them. Lack of sleep will do him in as quickly as a gunshot wound. Daredevil and Matt Murdock, both at their best. 

He shuts off the water. Best to call the landlord again in the morning and throw his weight behind it this time. With caution. Matt has a reputation for suing landlords and, while well-deserved, if he gets evicted he's going to have a hard time finding anyone in Hell's Kitchen that will take him. He slides open the shower curtain, shimmies out into the fuzzy placemat, and quickly dries off with one of three fluffy towels on the rack. The cold is worse out here, biting. He hangs his wet towel to dry over the curtain, tucks a fresh one around his waist, and wraps another over his hair. Matt sleeps in the nude and it's a short walk from his bathroom to his bed. 

The bathroom exits into the bedroom and the bedroom continues unobstructed by walls into the living room and kitchen. The open concept and massive windows facing the street bring to mind an artist's studio rather than a lawyer's apartment, but any art Matt gets up to is a collaboration effort held within the perimeter of his bed for about forty-five minutes repeated two or three times a month. He snickers quietly. 

Rarely does he go to bed alone and in a good mood. That should have been his first sign something was about to take a turn. 

His next sign is the sound of rubber against metal and metal against brick coming from outside his apartment building. Matt is sitting at the end of his bed running one towel over his hair when he hears the first frantic scrape. The towel slips through his fingers and lands on the floor, forgotten. Matt attentively faces forward, then tilts one ear in the direction of the fire escape just outside his window where someone is laboriously making their way up. He can hear their ragged breaths and abnormally high heart rate, not like exertion but like injury. Their hand slips on the railing and they fall down to their knees. The fire escape clangs and as it makes Matt flinch it rouses people without his super hearing. Three lights click on almost simultaneously, the most inquisitive and nosy minds in the block on full alert. One phone comes off the receiver. Matt places the kneeling heartbeat again. It is a familiar vibration, like marching feet. Like a gun salute. 

"Frank?" He asks his apartment. 

Frank slaps his hand against the window. He took the remaining flight on his knees while Matt sat static. 

"Choir boy." He calls. The hand on the glass turns into a fist. "Sanctuary." 

Matt kicks into high gear and runs to the window. The fire escape comes just past his bedroom. He runs his fingers over the sill and opens the latch. Frank's rectangular build forms as the window rises. Matt has to do a double-take before he understands what's wrong with his silhouette. He's never been around the man when there weren't at least three guns on his person to distort his shape. 

"Frank?" He asks again, this time to the man himself. 

The Punisher takes the open window like an invitation and throws himself over onto Matt's floor. He is bleeding from somewhere, likely the spot his hand is hugging so tightly. Matt holds his hands in front of himself, unsure whether to help him in or push him out. After the decision has been made for him, the closes the window and hopes no one calls the police or knows where to send them to. 

"Murdock," Frank says almost amiably. He leans against the wall and kicks his legs out from under him. Moving jostles his wounds and the air out of him like a whistle. "Place lookin' about as nice as I remember it." 

"Thank you," Matt replies reflexively but perturbed. "Did you come to die here?" 

"You're about as nice as I remember you, too." 

Frank leans forward and groans. The pain is centered around his ribs. He keeps reaching for them, then dropping his hand when he remembers it would be worse on contact. Matt has been there. Not that Frank would know that. 

"I haven't seen you since the trial last year."

Lie. Matt Murdock hasn't seen Frank Castle in a year, but the Devil has. They bump into each other on the same jobs more often than Daredevil actually hunts for the Punisher, but they've had their share of scraps. He doesn't make the distinction between the man and the demon for Frank. In his case, they are one and the same. 

Last year Matt stuck his neck out for the Punisher. They jailed him. It didn't take. Punisher got out, made a name for himself in other neighborhoods. To his understanding, Frank is damn near untouchable and untraceable. Daredevil gave him a wide berth, warned him to stay out of Hell's Kitchen, and prayed for the souls he took outside the comfort of his twenty blocks. 

He is not responsible for the Punisher's current predicament and suspects if he asks Frank will refuse to tell him who is. For his protection.

"I meant to call." Frank jokes. 

"Why are you here, Frank?" Matt presses. "Why shouldn't I call the police right this minute?"

"I need a place to lie low and patch up. I looked through your cabinets when I stayed here after posting bail and know you got everything I need." Asshole. But Matt already knew that. "As for the other thing-- because you hate cops." 

"I do not hate cops. I hate dirty cops." Matt corrects, much to Frank's mirth. His ribs hurt him when he laughs. They both know most of the police in the area are bought or for sale. He bluffs. "I can't patch you up. I'll have to call… Karen."

That puts an end to Frank's good humor quickly. His pulse quivers. Fiercely protective, even the suggestion of Karen's is offensive. He grunts. "No Karen. I can do it myself. Just bring me the kit." 

"You need to go to a hospital." 

He's already on his way to the bathroom when he says it. It's meaningless talk that will just bang through one of Frank's ears and shoot straight out the other without due contemplation, but it makes him feel better to get the obvious out of the way. One minute too long around the Punisher and even common sense starts to leave the room. It's good to stay grounded. 

Matt drops his heavy first-aid kit in front of his unwelcome guest. It holds more than a first-aid kit should. Cuts, scrapes, burns, the standard. Stuff to disinfect, anesthetize, and suture. There are over one-hundred-fifty items, each in their own divider, on their own floor, and the kit springs up three stories tall when you press the right spot. Matt's face is perfectly blank. Frank has already seen this case and he's had over a year to consider its contents, but still hasn't connected the dots. Perhaps he thinks Matt is clumsy, or more likely concerned about mob orders with his name on them. He is not Daredevil and he can't be.

Daredevil's body would be battered with signs of struggle. Like the palm-sized bruise on his thigh, beneath the towel-- the only thing he's wearing at the moment. He could have any other number of bruises along his chest, arms, and legs. He barely feels them sometimes. Matt hugs himself. 

"Don't get shy on me now, Murdock. The All-Mighty won't fault you for a bit of pre-marital nudity." 

Frank's dug out a bottle of alcohol to wash his hands and the wound. He grabs wads of cotton and holds them between his knuckles, using them one at a time and dropping them on a steel tray after. By the pattern his hands follow, there are three large cuts connecting his right pectoral to his hip bone. Not too deep, won't even leave a scar. They are the first thing Frank thought to address, so they must be the worst of his injuries. He doesn't reach for the suture kit after the wound is clean, but cream and bandages. 

"What happened to you?"

Frank Castle is in his apartment invoking sanctuary--and, yes, Matt gets the joke-- without his guns, with strange cuts in his chest, bruised ribs, and good humor. He sounded much worse for wear coming up the stairs than he did reclined between Matt's floor and wall. Maybe the paranoid doomsday prepper got caught with his guard down. Yet Matt would bet his right pinky that the Punisher has at least two safe houses in Hell's Kitchen and he's got his own overstocked first-aid kits in them. The only thing unique about Matt's apartment... is Matt.

"What do you want?" He scowls. 

"I already have what I want." Frank motions around his apartment. "A place to lie low."

"You will get me killed." 

Guilt is a dirty game to play with the Punisher. It's also a test, of sorts. Frank would never actually put a civilian in danger if there were other options. If he leaves, something is on his trail. If he remains, the danger is long gone. Frank shuts the kit after he's applied bandages around his chest and over his shoulder. He stands up. They're the same height, roughly the same weight. Frank's just a little thicker around his middle. He doesn't rely on lean strength and acrobatics, just solid aim and cover. 

"That's a chance I'm willing to take with your life, choir boy." 

Matt's blood freezes over. A muscle clenches in his jaw. He doesn't know if he's preparing to swing at Frank or whatever is bound to follow him through the fire escape. 

"Whoa, whoa. I forgot." Frank raises his arms in an unpracticed gesture of surrender. "I winked. I promise no one's tailin' me." 

Matt sighs, but the tension runs out of him all the same, replaced by a weariness he thought he shook off in the shower. He runs a hand over his stinging eyes and remembers he needed to be asleep thirty minutes ago. If there is no immediate danger… Frank can stay. On the couch, where Matt preferably won't find him when he gets back from the office. 

"You." Matt points. His hand takes a 45-degree turn towards the living room. "Couch." 

To his credit, Frank goes without argument… Or pillows and a blanket. It can get cold in his apartment, heat and water are the least reliable necessities in the building. Matt is morally obligated to go into his bedroom closet and pick through his least favorite blankets to find something for the Punisher. If worst comes to worst, Matt doesn't want the man on his couch catching a cold. God only knows how long he'll stay then.  He takes from the 60% polyester pile back to Frank who's already made himself at home with his feet on the coffee table. If Matt had his white cane he would hit him behind the knees. He puts the blankets and a cushion in place of a pillow at the head of the couch. 

"Are your wounds okay?"

"They're clean and dressed." Frank helpfully replies. 

"Then I want you gone tomorrow." 

He doesn't stay to gauge Frank's intention to follow through on that demand. His plans to sleep in the nude as God made him are no longer viable and it's an ordeal to find a pair of pajamas that still fit him. Foggy got him a full set a couple of years ago for his birthday. Pink silk with black lining, he described them, composed of a button-up and pair of shorts with matching slippers (which he does actually use). Upon running his fingers over the tag, the threads pushed the words Victoria's Secret into the pads of his fingers. It was a gag gift more than anything. Foggy was his roommate for four glamorous years and no one has seen him go commando for longer. 

For something he was never meant to wear it fits him surprisingly well. The bedsheet in direct contact with his skin is always silk, and this creates a similar barrier between him and his duvet. It is not as unpleasant as he thought it would be. 

Sleep won't come with the Punisher twenty feet away, but he can at least lie horizontally and hope that rest lifts the lead off his limbs.

Matt tucks his body under the sheets. He listens for Frank doing the same. All the excitement has thrown off Matt's heartbeat. It is a thunderous presence in his ear, stuttered in palpitations. He only notices when his breath comes hot on the pillow that he's been holding it in intermittently since he first heard Frank's rattling. How long has he been keeping his chest still, afraid even the slightest movement might set off the Punisher or whatever danger nips at his heels like a disloyal dog. Sweat pools in the arch of his feet. What the hell is he doing opening his doors to Frank as easily as he might Jessica, or Luke, Danny, or-- Elektra? It is a bit of the old Catholic anxiety that God will take him quietly in his sleep and he will go without repenting. Matt is not exactly hoping for assumption, but one generally wants to reach the Kingdom without the charges of aiding and abetting on their conscience. 

Aiding and abetting is the law of man, Father Lantom might say, judge not lest he be judged is the law of God.

The things Matt tells himself to sleep at night.

Matt turns in his restless sleep. It is the sound of his hand hitting the bed anew that sends a pulse of his senses across the room, and every built-in alarm in his body sounds off as his radar hits a blip standing on his bedroom rug, watching over him. 

"Frank?" Matt asks the darkness dryly, once the angel Gabriel fades from the possible suspect map his mind draws for him. 

"I was--" Frank grinds his teeth. He holds his fists next to his body. "There were Purifiers--beating on some kids and their teacher. I didn't want to kill anyone in front of the kids, but-- White on black, my costume, reinforcements got confused, saw me standing over the slim one, and I--"

"Frank, slow down." Matt sits up, he draws the sheets around his chest like a lady protecting her virtue. "What are you saying?"

"There was a woman. Redhead." Frank growls the descriptor as if redheads are the very bane of his existence. "She got a hold of me. She said--"

Frank grips his hair. The memory itself is pain. He feels things he shouldn't. Electricity and meat. Neurons firing. His pulse, a ticking time bomb waiting to go off between his temples. The liquid in his head, a thousand pounds heavier. He was not supposed to remember quite so soon. He is on his knees again and this time Murdock is over him. He crawled through his bedsheets with his hair in his eyes, hand in front of himself while he searches for Frank. Frank grabs Matt's forearm and locks them together like gladiators. He thinks for a moment if they held each other just right, all the little scrapes and scratches marking their bodies in thin, raised scars would align and he might understand something, this thing better.  He remembers the lady redhead's words. Do you have someone you care about? She didn't wait for his voice. She took the answer from his head. The first face that came to mind. Good. Find him. Watch over him.

"Frank? Frank! Listen to me." Matt puts his other hand on his shoulder and shakes him until Frank lifts his head. Matt's billboard-lit figure brings relief to this senseless compulsion inside him. "I think you met the X-Men. It would certainly explain the claw marks."

"Yes." Frank agrees. He is feverish, disoriented, and whatever Matt sounds are coming out of Matt's mouth are the rightest thing in his world. 

"I think one of their telepaths might have cooked your brain a little." Matt winces. His hand moves from his shoulder to his back in a soothing swipe. "I'm sure they didn't mean to. The X-Men can be very protective of their people. They only wanted you out of their way, which to be fair is understandable given your track record... Let's get you back on the couch."

"No!" Frank grabs more of his arm, claiming his bicep and pulling him down. This frenzy overcame him on the couch. The same impulse that drove him across Manhattan searching for Matt Murdock's apartment grew more intense in his vicinity. This thing the redhead put in him will not be satisfied by anything but contact-- or perhaps this is not her doing at all, just Frank's brain conflating an order to protect with the desire to consume. He whispers, quieter, not demanding but pleading. "No. Please, Red."

After a pause, Matt's hand comes to his face. His fingers touch between his brows and separate over the shape of his nose, searching. He is a woodcut of his mental state. Distress is as clear as the lines around his mouth, the tight clench of his jaw. Matt ends the brief exploration with the back of his hand against his forehead. He doesn't need to touch him to know his heart, but it grounds him with certainty. Everything Frank has said to him is the truth, and none more apparent that being separated from his side will kill him.

[katasztroka]

Two weeks later than this: https://katasztroka.tumblr.com/post/615193559211081728/something-new-i-dont-have-a-taglist-but-if

I don’t have a taglist, but if anyone wants to be added, I will make one.

Trigger warning: masturbation, sexual attraction, drunk Ludwig

- 

Ludwig was training, as he did every morning. But this was different. He wanted to empty his mind as much as he could, because he wanted to get rid of his thoughts about Roderich. For two days now, he had been craving the Austrian’s skilled, soft kisses, wanted to hold him close and bury his face into the other’s statue-like alabaster skin.

And obviously - or at least he thought - this was not about Roderich, this was purely about the absence of Feliciano. Although, he had once loved this man, he didn’t think  what he was feeling now was genuinely for Roderich. Thus he had to get rid of these thoughts. He couldn’t break Roderich’s heart. Not again. Not after all he had done for him during the past few days. This man comforted him, fed him, gave him shelter. He said Ludwig could stay as long as he wished, because he knew full well that the German needed a break from all the country work. Thankfully, Gilbert would do the work that needed personal presence and Ludwig did the rest online.

Ludwig did his daily trainings twice even though Roderich told him to slow down a bit and made sure Ludwig would feel safe when he wanted to talk about the break-up. But he didn’t talk about it. He didn’t want Roderich to hear all his thoughts, even if he knew how the Austrian was really good at handling relationships.

Now he was just about finishing his first training for that day and the sun was rising. He decided to have a shower and then make breakfast for Roderich to show some gratitude towards him for everything. So he went up to the bathroom - the only one in the house he had ever used - and took a shower. This was the same bathroom that Roderich used, so he could smell the other’s countless amount of beauty products that Roderich somehow managed to match in fragrance. Ludwig had always been amazed by this.

While he was taking off his clothes - which somehow resembled military uniform - he decided to wash the dirty clothes. He quickly sorted out the whites and threw them into the washing machine - once again he wanted Roderich to see how grateful he was for letting him stay. The shower was fast and short and he didn’t gel his hair this time. It wouldn’t have mattered, since he wanted to train once more that day and he intended to shower after that one, too. He walked back to his room, only wearing the towel around his waist, since he thought Roderich would still be asleep. But he was wrong. The Austrian stood in front of him, face flushed a bit pink, lips parted slightly in surprise. He was still wearing his pajamas.

‘Good morning.’ Roderich muttered.

‘Good morning. Sorry.’ Ludwig blushed deep red, though they had seen each other naked many times before.

‘It’s fine.’

‘I will dress up. Roderich…’

‘Yes?’

‘Will you let me make breakfast today?’

‘If you want to, yes. But I’ll make coffee.’

‘Of course.’ Ludwig hurried to his room, leaving the surprised, embarrassed Austrian alone.

This was Roderich’s turn to have a morning shower, but first he made coffee. After that, he picked a dark blue shirt and black trousers for the day, considering he would have a meeting with Chancellor Kurz in the evening. Then he occupied the bathroom. He usually spent about thirty minutes in there, having a shower, washing his hair, using face masks, making every single lock of his hair stand perfectly. But today he tried to be faster, so it only took him twenty minutes. When he finally decided his appearance would be good enough for that day, he left the bathroom to have breakfast with Ludwig.

Of course, the kitchen was perfectly organised when he arrived and Ludwig has just finished cooking.

‘Thank you, Ludwig. For cleaning up, too.’

‘I wanted to show some gratitude that I can always come to you when I need some peace.’ Ludwig answered.

‘Of course, you can. You will always have that room whenever you want to use it. At least, I won’t be alone.’ Roderich smiled, but Ludwig had the impression that he was sad. ‘Don’t you think I’m pathetic? Clinging on to every chance of having someone to talk to.’

‘But you talk to Basch everyday, don’t you?’

‘Not anymore. He didn’t like the idea of me joining the EU.’

‘Oh, I didn’t know. Sorry.’

‘Oh, Ludwig. You shouldn’t be listening to an old country complaining.’ Roderich shook his head. ‘What are your plans for the day?’

‘I thought I would go out in the evening. Do you want to come with me?

‘I wish, Ludwig, but I have a meeting with Chancellor Kurz at seven tonight.’

‘Fine. Can I use your PC today? I need to video call Merkel.’

‘Of course, you can, as always.’ Roderich nodded, taking some of the omelet to his plate. ‘This smells delicious.’

‘Thank you. I hope it tastes as good as it smells.’ Ludwig sat down in front of him. ‘Do you want some more?’

‘No, you can have the rest.’

‘Sausage? Toast?’ The German offered.

‘I will have two slices of toast. What did you put in this omelet? It tastes so good.’

‘I added some cheese. I’ve never tried it before, so I was hoping you would like it.’

‘Delicious.’ The Austrian nodded. ‘Thank you.’

They ate silently. Ludwig had always been surprised that Roderich ate so little. Maybe that was the secret that kept him so slim and fragile. But the most surprising for the German was the fact that Roderich ate that small amount of food for the same amount of time, he ate his own.

‘Roderich?’ Ludwig spoke up, while packing the dirty dishes.

‘Yes?’

‘Do you have time today to play on the piano for me?’ Ludwig asked.

‘Yes, of course.’ Roderich’s smile was  obvious, though he didn’t smile that much.

‘I know I can play the piano, but I would love to hear you playing.’

‘You will. What do you want me to play?’ Roderich asked, already opening the folder on his iPad that contained digitalized music sheets.

‘I want you to choose. I’d be glad to hear your favorites.’

‘Oh, so you want me to play more than one piece, don’t you?’ Roderich asked teasingly.

‘Yes, if you have time.’ Ludwig blushed a little.

‘I have.’ The Austrian nodded. ‘But there is something we need to clear up. I don’t have favorites. Choosing between the piano pieces would be like choosing among my children.’

‘Obviously.’ Ludwig nodded in agreement.

Roderich scrolled through the music sheets until he found what he was looking for. ‘Debussy?’ He asked finally.

‘Perfect. That fits you.’

‘Great. Come, you can finish packing later.’

Ludwig had a terrified last look on the kitchen. Should he leave it like that? Roderich didn’t even seem to mind it, so he followed the Austrian.

The music room was a beautiful, airy room with perfect acoustics to it, built exactly for playing any instrument  ever made. Roderich sat on the bench and placed the iPad on the piano.

‘Can… Can I sit next to you?’

‘No, you have to stand next to the piano.’ Roderich rolled his eyes. ‘Of course, you can. It would be preferred.’

Ludwig took a seat next to him, but he decided to keep distance for two reasons. One, he wanted Roderich to have all the place he’d need and secondly, he didn’t want to smell him, because that would lead to disastrous consequences. He waited quietly until Roderich got ready to play and when the Austrian took a deep breath, he closed his eyes, knowing full well the other would finally start playing.

But then, just as Roderich started to play, Ludwig felt the need to open his eyes. Roderich’s eyes were closed. He looked so beautiful and Ludwig wanted to kiss him or at least touch him. To run his hand down his back or bury his face into Roderich’s hair.

Roderich finished Debussy’s Arabesque No.1 and Ludwig was already out of his mind, thinking about this man, sitting next to him, playing the piano.

‘Do you want to hear another piece?’ Roderich asked, his voice sounding heavenly.

‘Yes, if you don’t mind.’ Ludwig answered blushing.

The Austrian nodded without opening his eyes. He started to play Debussy’s Clair de Lune. Ludwig didn’t understand why Roderich still used the sheets, because actually, he didn’t. And this was something that Ludwig thought was really impressive. And of course, listening to this man playing the piano, Ludwig started to feel like his pants were too tight. But no way, this was happening. He couldn’t wait until the end of the piece. He jumped up and headed to one of the doors, but Roderich’s worried voice stopped him.

‘Ludwig, is there something wrong?’ He asked.

‘No, I just… I need to go to the bathroom.’ The German muttered, blushing.

Roderich nodded and Ludwig could hear that he closed the cover of the piano and suddenly an even worse feeling hit the German: it was guilt. He knew he had to ease himself, so he rushed to the bathroom and closed the door. It was fast and - just for an even worse wave of guilt - he couldn’t think of Feliciano. His memories of Roderich came to his mind and those pictures made the whole process become even faster. He cleaned himself up and decided to avoid Roderich for the rest of the day - this palace-like house would be a perfect setting for this - so he closed Roderich’s study to himself.

The next time they met was before Roderich left for the meeting. He knocked on the study ’s door.

‘I hope everything is fine, Ludwig.’ He said, not even entering.

‘Yes, sorry. I got carried away with work.’

‘You should sometimes be a bit easier on yourself, Ludwig.’

‘I will try to.’

‘Right. Now, I need to leave for this meeting. Have fun going out, I don’t know when I will be back. I put keys on the drawers in the hall for you.’

‘Thank you. Good luck, Roderich.’

The Austrian nodded and left. He sat in his car and left for the downtown of Vienna. The meeting was long enough for him to start wandering, because he wasn’t really able to concentrate for too long. Or at least, not on country business. There was a point where he started to scroll through his phone. Luckily, because he got a text message from Ludwig, saying he left to go out. He was both surprised and happy that the German felt like letting him know.

When the meeting was finally over, he texted Ludwig, asking if he would want to come home with him, but the answer was no, so he drove home alone. He closed the door and took a shower, but decided to wait for Ludwig awake. He went back to the music room and played Chopin’s Spring Waltz.

Ludwig arrived at the end of the piece. He was visibly drunk and Roderich decided it was a good idea to help him with getting into bed. The drunk German walked into the music room and stood next to the sitting Austrian.

‘Roderich.’ He stated, voice heavily influenced by the amount of alcohol he drank.

‘Yes, Ludwig?’ There was no answer, so he decided to continue. ‘Come, you should have a shower.’

‘No. I have to tell you that you are beautiful.’

‘Thank you. But you really need to shower.’ He stood up. ‘Come with me.’

The German followed him without any need of support, but just before they entered the bathroom, Ludwig started to keck.

‘Oh, come on. Just keep it in, it’s just some more steps, Ludwig. Come.’ Roderich guided him towards the toilet bowl, and he arrived just in time. ‘You did well.’ The Austrian softly stroked back his hair, while taking a seat next to him. ‘Let it all come out.’ He tried his best not to start vomiting himself, because of the smells, but kept on caressing the blond locks.

When it seemed like Ludwig had emptied his stomach, Roderich handed him the toothbrush.

‘Do you think it’s safe to sleep in your room?’ He asked, helping the German up.

Ludwig shook his head and Roderich decided to stay with him during the night. He wasn’t sure whether the German would - unwillingly - hurt himself, so he wanted to take care of him.

‘Fine. Then I will sleep here with you. We would need blankets and pillows, right?’ And he immediately left the bathroom.

While picking up bed sheets, he was thinking about this situation. He couldn’t believe that this was happening to him, a once-great nation, who ruled over Europe now sacrificing all his dignity for this beloved German who has left him to die more than once before. Still, he couldn’t say no and he would do anything Ludwig would ask for.

Finally, he got all the stuff he thought they would need and headed back to the bathroom. When he arrived, Ludwig was already asleep, curled up as he did in his childhood, fists pressed together as if he was trying to get hold of something in his sleep. Roderich couldn’t help himself and smiled, shaking his head. Then placed a pillow next to the bathtub for support, sat down, and pulled Ludwig’s head into his lap. He wrapped his bare feet into one blanket and he used the other to cover the German’s body.

‘Everything is fine.’ He whispered, caressing the pale face once more. ‘Sleep now, you need to. Hopefully you won’t get a terrible hangover tomorrow. Good night, Ludwig.’

Roderich fell asleep slowly, his hand placed on Ludwig’s face, knowing too well that he would get a horrible backache in the morning. He was a bit cold, too, but he couldn’t care less about it, he was too tired and only caring about Ludwig sleeping well. It was fine like that.

[imaginethisbts]

it takes two to make a thing go right (dogboy hybrid au) pt. 1

Rated: M

Warning: Dom themes, possessive behavior, knotting, excessive oral sex, rough sex. 

Summary: What’s better than one dogboy lover? Two dogboy lovers. But when Tae and Jungkook seem unusually clingy, it can only mean one thing. That time of the month has snuck up on you and your dogboy lovers do not want to share. 

Note: jungkook is mean to taehyung in this cuz hes the dom alpha and taehyung tests his dominance too much =( but the smut is filthy and nasty lmfaoo. also i apologize in advance if the writing is a little weird and random in some spots. ive written on this story while being terribly exhausted, and then while being drunk, sad and mad. lol what im trying to say is i wrote parts of this story in numerous states of mind! oh and yes theres gonna be a second part to this so plz dont ask ill get it out asap. enjoy my loves!

Words: 8.4k

Since the dishes in the sink had gotten dangerously high from neglect, you thought you'd finally set up shop in the kitchen and try to tackle the giant mess. With your laptop sitting up on the bar in front of you playing Bob’s Burgers on Hulu and your big glass of lemonade set to the side, you were totally prepared to spend some time here at the sink.

The reason for there being so many dirty dishes was because living with two male hybrids was like living with two bottomless pits when it came to food. They ate so much, and did not understand the concept of reusing dishes under any circumstances. Every time they ate, it was a new dish being used, no matter how many times you tried to explain to them that their glasses could at least be used more than once.

They were utterly clueless.

Glancing over the top of your lap top into the living room, you saw Jungkook and Taehyung sitting on the edge of the couch, controllers clutched in their hands as they stared intently at the screen in front of them. You huffed a sigh of relief at them finally seeming to be content, returning your attention back to the task at hand.

The past couple of days they had been unbelievably clingy, begging for your attention constantly and not allowing you to get anything productive done at home. Finally after having enough of their constant pestering, you broke down this morning and went to the store to buy them a new videogame for the PS4.

And so far, that had done the trick at distracting them so you could get some work done, but you could only hope it would last.

After you filled the dishwasher up, you started the cleaning cycle on it and continued hand cleaning the left over dishes you couldn't fit into the machine. That was, until you suddenly heard an argument break out in the living room, their voices getting louder as one accused the other of cheating and the other heatedly denying.

You leaned your head back and closed your eyes, taking a deep breath to try and keep your sanity from slipping away. Should have known the peace wouldn't last long.  

Most of the time you tried to let them work out their problems alone without interfering, since they were grown adults after all, but sometimes that just wasn't the best idea.

Like now, when you heard Jungkook's deep growl reverberate through the air.

You knew from past experiences that that sound was bad news, so you quickly turned the faucet off and grabbed your dish towel, making your way into the living room to break up the fight as you wiped your hands off.

The sight that awaited you was nothing if not expected, but it never failed to surprise you at the same time.

"Get off!" Taehyung shouted and squirmed, currently being pushed head first into the couch by Jungkook, who was positioned on top of Taehyung, growling and snapping at the other's neck in warning.

Taehyung snarled in defense, squirming and trying to get Jungkook off of him, but the other hybrid was just so much stronger, making the feat almost impossible. It wasn't until Jungkook bucked his hips into Taehyung, in their strange way of showing dominance, that Taehyung finally collapsed to the couch and bared his throat, whining in submission.

Jungkook huffed, bending down to nose at Taehyung's neck and then nip at it, causing the smaller hybrid to whimper. "You cheated. Admit it."

"But I didn't," Taehyung whined desperately and Jungkook's deep growl sounded again, and that's when you realized you had just been standing there watching and that now was a good time to make yourself known.

"Stop it. Jungkook, get off of him now." You jumped into action, grabbing  Jungkook's upper arm and trying to pull him off of Taehyung, but Jungkook snapped his head towards you and growled in warning. It only lasted for a moment however, because when he realized it was you, he whined lowly in his throat, licking your hand as an apology and climbing off of Taehyung to sit back on the couch.

Taehyung scrambled to sit up once Jungkook was off of him. His ears were flat amidst his hair and he curled slightly into himself, looking at you with sad, literal puppy dog eyes.

God, you wanted to cuddle him so badly right now, but you knew you had to whip things back into shape real quick.

You placed your hands angrily on your hips and huffed in irritation, glaring down at both of them. "Are you serious guys? Can you really not play nicely with each other?"

They both looked guilty now with their flat ears and lowered heads. You once asked them what their least favorite thing in the world was, and their answer was whenever you scolded them.

Hybrid worlds were not very wide and mostly always revolved around their master, lover, or caregiver.

"Since you two don't know how to play nicely, I guess I'll have to sit here and supervise you like children." You told them rather annoyed, planting yourself right in the middle of them on the couch. Immediately, the two of them flocked to you like a magnet. Jungkook went for your neck, nosing at a spot before licking it, scenting you so you smelt like him. Taehyung hugged your arm and rubbed his cheek into your hair, his own way of scenting you.

The video game was suddenly forgotten and they weren't at each other's throats for the time being. This wasn't exactly the solution you were going for, but hey, it was a solution nonetheless.

Life with two hybrids was.... interesting, to say the very least.

And there were somethings you felt like you would never quite get used to.

For example, you don't think you could ever get used to the way Jungkook and Taehyung had to assert dominance over one another. Which, by the way, was by mounting the other one (fully clothed, of course) and giving a few thrusts into the other's behind while growling deeply and biting (not hard) into the other's neck.

Like what Jungkook just did to Taehyung over the video game debacle.

Jungkook was the worst one, and definitely the most dominate between him and Taehyung. He was never afraid to display that dominance either, like when they were playing together, arguing over something, and most importantly, when it came to you.

You never understood why one of them had to be above the other, but then again, there was a lot of things you didn't understand, giving the fact that they were half dogs.

Taehyung has tried to assert dominace over Jungkook in the past, but each and every time has led to a huge fight that you had to get into the middle of and break up. One of the times, Jungkook was so out of his mind with anger, he accidentally bit your arm hard enough to draw blood when you had thrown it out in a haste to get him away from Taehyung.

He had felt so bad, that the next few days after the incident, he wouldn't leave your side, whining in regret and licking your wound diligently. His saliva, being part dog, had helped the bite mark heal more quickly, and for that, you were grateful.

After a while of living together, harmony eventually fell between the three of you and Taehyung accepted his role as the submissive hybrid. Although every great once in awhile, he'd still try to challenge Jungkook, but it was mostly out of playfulness and Jungkook was always quick to put him back into his place.

Life was difficult living with two hyrbids, even more so with them being your lovers.

Sharing as a concept between the two never went over well, they were possessive by nature to begin with, so it was especially hard for them when they had to share you. Their bitch. You were still getting used to being called that, one half of you still finding it on the demeaning side, but the other half of you finding it strangely arousing.

Right now was a good example of their terrible sharing skills.

Jungkook tried to pull you towards him, snarling at Taehyung and the other just whined, pulling you back.

You felt like a rag-doll between them sometimes.

"Stop it, you guys. You're gonna tear me in two." You rolled your eyes, making to get up and return to the kitchen, but they both let out deep growls at your attempt. Back when you first met them, any growl that came out of their mouth frightened you and you stopped doing whatever it was that elicited that response from them in fear of what would happened. But now, you knew better, and knew that they were literally all bark and no bite. It was all about intimidation for them, and unfortunately, the trick just didn't work on you anymore. "Oh, you don't want to let me go? Okay then, you two are perfectly welcomed to go finish the dirty dishes that are mostly from you anyways."

Of course, their deep intimidating growls quickly turned into high pitched whines as they pawed at your arms.

"Baby," Taehyung whimpered when you continued to try and get up.

You ignored their whining and pleading and freed yourself before standing up from the couch, rolling your eyes once again when they got up after you and followed close behind you back into the kitchen. Like two desperately determined magnets.

A grin snuck across your face, but you willed it away before they saw it and realized you weren't upset with them after all. Sure, they really got on your nerves sometimes, but you couldn't help but to find their excessive affection endearing. After all, it came so naturally to them so it was always completely sincere. You were their entire world, and quite honestly, they were yours.

But you hated when they fought with each other, and despite them being your lovers, you were going to treat this problem like you would with any other bad habit of your... pet dog, for lack of better wording. And punish them by taking away something they enjoyed.

Which was you.

So you continued to ignore them as you returned to the sink, twisting on the faucet and picking up a dish to start scrubbing it clean. It was almost impossible to concentrate when they were nuzzling at your neck, their tongues poking out here and there on your skin, licking fervently and demanding your attention.

Being clingy was a normal thing for them, but this amount was unusual, they were practically frantic. It almost had you wondering if their behavior meant something was arriving.

At the mere thought of it, a shot of anticipation and arousal flew through your body and suddenly you were hyper aware of their big, strong hands tugging on your waist and hips. However, you controlled your hormones, knowing full well that if you let yourself get too worked up they would sense it and really be demanding your attention then. In more ways than one.

Taehyung whined, and you felt him rock his hips into you, knowing that he was trying to get your attention by enticing you.

The action didn't go unnoticed by the other however and Jungkook instantly turned his attention to Taehyung, a deep growl crawling up his throat and he abandoned you in favor of backing the other hybrid up against the counter, teeth bared and ears back in anger.

You huffed in annoyance at the fact another fight was about to break out, so you turned the faucet off once again in order to take care of things. "Stop, stop, stop," you demanded tiredly to Jungkook, but he didn't even acknowledge your words and continued to press into Taehyung's space.

"My bitch." Jungkook spat down at Taehyung, and you were surprised when Taehyung snarled back, challenging Jungkook.

"No," he shoved Jungkook back off of him. "She's fucking not."

Surprise colored your features at how Taehyung was not submitting and you suddenly became anxious, worried what was going to happen now. Nothing good ever came after Taehyung's refusal to submit, because Jungkook hated when his dominance was threatened.

"Guys, look at me," you tried, but they were too busy sizing each other up. "Guys!" You bit your lip, thinking hard on what to do, on how to nip this in the bud before it worsened considerably.

And then an idea popped into your head.

"I-I'll go lay down with you and rub your ears if you please just stop fighting!"

That was one of their grandest weaknesses. Ear rubs.

You almost laughed when you saw Taehyung's tail wag at the prospect of an ear rub despite how he was squared up with Jungkook. Even Jungkook's ears twitched after hearing that, and then they both glanced at you, tails lowering as they started wagging in guilt.

Ear rubs were clearly way more important than a dumb fight.

Reaching out your hands, you smiled softly.  "Come on my loves," you knew they loved it when you spoke sweetly to them. It always made them happy. So after that, they eagerly took ahold of your hands and let you lead them out of the kitchen, down the hall and into your shared bedroom.

At least you knocked out most of the dirty dishes. The rest would have to wait a little bit longer, and maybe you'd make Taehyung and Jungkook take care of them.

Once you got into the room, you didn't even have a chance to get on the bed yourself, because Taehyung was nudging you down onto it from behind with a huff. A squeak slipped passed your lips as you caught yourself on your hands in fear of falling face first into the mattress. Heartbeat increasing slightly from the unexpected push.

You huffed out a surprised laugh, looking over your shoulder to lightly scold Taehyung, but the amused look on your face quickly fell when you saw the way Taehyung and Jungkook were looking at you. They stood behind you, eyes dark as they stared down at you like two predators stalking their prey, licking their lips hungrily.

Belatedly, you realized your new position was quite the compromising one. Your face was down and ass was poked out into the air, a delicious and satisfying sight to the two hybrids who kept licking their lips. Jungkook even went as far as to lick his teeth. Their eyes were boring into your ass and when you looked down slightly, you saw the rapidly growing tent in their pants as their obvious arousal began to show.

You gulped in a mixture of anticipation and desire, trying to keep your hormones under control in fear of them literally pouncing on you. "T-Taehyung," you tried to scold with a shaky voice and then turn over to sit on your butt, but you quickly stopped moving at the sound of the deep growl that resounded from Jungkook.

Another gulp, out of slight fear this time.

"Jungkook, baby," you called sweetly in an attempt for him to lightened up on some of his intensity, and then you tried to turn over again, but he only let out another growl.

"Stay." He demanded, moving closer in behind you, but not without Taehyung growling in disagreement.

"Jungkook," Taehyung suddenly whined. "I got her like that, not you, so I get her first."

Jungkook seemed like he couldn't care less about Taehyung's misfortune in the slightest, only giving a snarl in response as he manhandled you to where you kneeling on the bed as well, making it to where you were now on all fours.

If the sight of you before was delicious to them, this one now was absolutely mouthwatering.

Not really knowing why since it seemed to be a lost cause now, you still tried to control your hormones. If you went full on unabashedly aroused, the reaction it elicited from the two hybrids was overwhelming and intense, so you tried to keep it as lowkey as possible while you prepared yourself for what was to come.

It was almost humorous how quickly things turned. It went from giving them innocent ear rubs, to giving them something far less innocent.

Your control on your arousal was slipping, especially when you felt the bed dip behind you as Jungkook climbed onto it. Biting your lip, you looked over your shoulder again and just about lost it at the sight of Jungkook. His teeth were bared slightly from a snarl and it was like he couldn't take his eyes off of your ass. Displayed so perfectly for him to take as he pleased.

It was a total lost cause when you felt a gush of wetness leak out of you onto your panties. There was no holding your hormones back now. And you knew it was now clouding the air when the two hybrids suddenly took a deep breath. Taehyung began to whine frantically, tail wagging as he paced behind Jungkook, wanting so badly to get to you, but knowing he couldn't because of the other hybrid.

Jungkook chose to mount you then, positioning himself to where he was over you and the large and prominent bulge in his pants was now pressed right up against your ass.

You let out a shaky breath, stomach twisting in a burning ball of arousal.

Taehyung tried to slowly get onto the end of the bed, but Jungkook turned on him and growled, making him back away with a whine.

You would scold Jungkook in times like this, and tell him to share you with Taehyung, but Jungkook's possessiveness in this setting was admittedly a guilty pleasure of yours. It made you feel so wanted and desired on such a filthy level - plus, Jungkook always shared in the end. After he got off inside of you, he'd let Taehyung have his turn, so you didn't feel too bad.

But one thing that was even better than letting Jungkook just have at you, was making Jungkook work for it. He always got so riled up, that when he finally got you, he was fucking ruthless. Which you loved.

So when you felt him tugging your tight lounge shorts down, you quickly flipped yourself over to where you were sitting on your butt, a breathless laugh tumbling out.

Jungkook huffed in irritation, immediately going for your hips to just flip you back over, but you moved back away from him until you were up at the pillows. The grin on your face couldn't be helped, this was too much fun. He stared at you for a moment, frowning, before he made to move towards you.

"Nah-ah-ah," you waved a finger at him, lifting your foot up to press against his chest, halting him from coming closer. "You haven't been a very good boy today Kookie, so why should I let you have me?"

Jungkook bent down and licked at your ankle with a whine, looking at you with his puppy dog eyes. "Please," he pleaded, lowering his hand to grab at his aching cock through his pants. His hips jumped from the friction of his own hand.

"Please isn't an answer, Kookie," you were tempted to tease him by letting Taehyung come get you, but you knew that wasn't a smart idea. Things could turn seriously violent then.

Speaking of Taehyung, he carefully and slowly tried to get onto the bed again and Jungkook was too distracted by trying to get you to surrender to notice his movements. So by the time Taehyung was up onto the bed and moving closer to you, it was too late for Jungkook to get him off of the bed.

Now, you had two eager hybrids in front of you, that were very much aroused and with very little patience.

You smirked, deciding to turn this little game up a notch or two. With your left hand, you slowly smoothed it down your stomach until you got to the waistband of your shorts. Taehyung and Jungkook were completely still, watching your hand intently with their ears perked up.

You bit your lip to try and contain the grin threatening to spread across your face but it was a futile attempt. When your fingers slipped passed your waistband, you caught sight of their tails begin to wag in anticipation and impatience. You dipped two of your fingers between your folds and then slowly slipped your hand back out with a pop of your waistband. Lifting your fingers into the air, Taehyung and Jungkook followed the movement closely, their tongue coming out to lick their lips.

It was Taehyung who first tried to lean in to steal a lick, but you simply pulled your hand back and with your other one you placed it against his chest to halt his movements.

"No." You firmly said, and Taehyung sat back with a whimper, rubbing his head against Jungkook's shoulder, in which the other hybrid just turned his head and licked Taehyung's cheek quickly in acknowledgment.

"I want you," Taehyung whined, licking his lips again when you brushed the two wet fingers against each other.

You sighed, stomach twisting in a sharp pang of arousal at how utterly desperate they were to have you.

"You want me?" You cooed at them, and they suddenly became frantic, tails wagging and their heads nodding in agreement. "If you get me, what will you do with me?"

"Breed you." Jungkook said immediately with a growl, puffing his chest out slightly and your foot slid off of him, making your leg fall back down onto the mattress. He stayed put though, despite the lack of barrier now.

You almost moaned at his answer, becoming even wetter and thinking of how amazing it'll feel to eventually have Jungkook's thick cock inside of you - pinning you to the bed as he pounds you senselessly.

Some might say this was down right cruel, but you parted your legs, again gaining their undivded attention as they waited for what was next, and then smoothed your hand down onto your clothed center, patting it lightly.

"You wanna fill me up, Kookie?"

A shiver of excitement shot up your spine at the growl your words elicted from Jungkook deep within his chest. He tried to move to get in between your legs, but you quickly shut them before he had the chance, giving him a smirk and another wave of your finger.

"Did I tell you you could come touch me?" You asked him, but he just puffed a breath out of his nose in utter annoyance. Clearly growing tired of your little games.

But that's exactly what you wanted.

You were so caught up in Jungkook however, you failed to notice Taehyung who had moved in enough to gingerly stick his tongue out and lick at your two fingers that were still damp with your arousal. Honestly, you didn't have the heart to shoo him away, so you allowed him to frantically lick your fingers clean. His ears were laid back in fear of you scolding him, but you just stared at his skillfull tongue, at the way it curled around your fingers and lapped deliciously.

Suddenly an idea popped into your head and you pulled your hand away, much to Taehyung's disappointent, but you didn't care because you were about to give him something so much better.

They watched you curiously, wondering what you were doing, but when they saw you lift your hips off of the bed to start tugging your lounge shorts down, they immediately started whining in anticipation. You dropped your hips, telling them to behave and be patient as you slowly slid the shorts down your legs, taking your time and teasing them as much as you could.

After you slipped your feet out of them, you made sure to keep your legs pressed together for the time being.

"Mm," you bit your lip, gazing up at them with hooded eyes. "Do my babies want a little treat?" You gave them a little preview by spreading your legs slightly, just enough for them to catch a glimpse of your deliciousness in-between and then closing them again.

They about fucking lost it.

You couldn't even try to keep them out, because Jungkook was promptly forcing your legs apart with his impressive strength and making room for himself between them. Taehyung grabbed your leg, pulling it up and outwards so he could have room too, but Jungkook had different thoughts on that.

He growled deeply at Taehyung to back away from what was his, but the other hybrid just lowered his ears to make himself look non-threatening and Jungkook decided to just not worry about it anymore. Everyone here knew whose bitch you were and who would be breeding you first.

Your legs were spread wide, exposing your glistening swollen center that looked absolutely irresitable to the two hybrids.

Yet something was holding them back, like they were so strung-out they couldn't even get themselves to actually taste you. So you ran two fingers through your wetness again and then lifted your hand into the air for them. They almost bumped heads in their haste to lick your fingers, both of them whimpering at the amazing taste.

You became even wetter when they started licking into each others mouths in an attempt to find more, having cleaned your fingers completely of the sweetness.

God, it was erotic and unbelievably hot. You were truly blessed to have two hybrids as lovers.

"You want more babies?" You cooed at them, patting the source of it all to get their attention.

Unrestrained now that he had a taste, Jungkook was the first to dive in, burying his face into your pussy and going to town with his tongue. They weren't the only ones having been strung-out, so after finally getting stimulation down there and rough stimulation at that, your stomach twisted in a vicious knot, heat blazing through your core.

"Oh God, Kookie," you moaned in a high pitch, thighs trembling from the ruthless stimulation of his frantic tongue. You tangled your hand in his hair, stuck between wanting to move away from the sharp pleasure or move even closer in search for a delicious release in the future.

Taehyung carefully moved in, trying to find a good angle for his head and he ended up just pressing in beside Jungkook and licking whatever part of skin he could reach, which happened to be crease where your leg met your pelvis. Jungkook was quite frankly hogging the good stuff.

A possessive growl ripped from Jungkook's chest at Taehyung's proximity, but he was way too enthralled in the taste of you to press the matter any further. He moved down a bit and shoved his tongue into your entrance, licking deeply, as far as he could go and your eyes almost rolled back into your head at the sheer pleasure. Especially because after he did that, Taehyung took advantage of the space and angled his head to where he was lapping at your clit.

You've had previous lovers. Quite a few before the two hybrids came along. But none of them could even compare to Taehyung and Jungkook in bed. Looking down, and seeing both of their heads between your legs and knowing that they wanted to be there, made you throw your head back and moan as you shifted your hips in pleasure. Some of your old lovers wouldn't even eat you out (they didn't last very long), and the others that did only did it out of obligation.

But Jungkook and Taehyung genuinely loved eating you out, the taste of you utterly addictive to them.

A rush of heat headed south when you watched Taehyung begin humping Junkook's leg in search of friction, a whine escaping his throat.

Jungkook, seeing it as Taehyung trying to assert dominance over him, reluctantly pulled his mouth away from you in order to bare his teeth and growl at the other hybrid. Taehyung completely ignored him, taking this opportunity to really dive into you now that Jungkook had pulled back a bit and he continued to rock his hips into the other, enjoying the friction it was granting.

"Jungkook," you moaned out when you saw him make a move to probably tackle Taehyung, but you caught his attention just in time. "No." You tried to sound firm when he looked up at you, but your voice wavered from the extreme pleasure Taehyung was currently giving you.

The black haired hybrid chose to ignore you, turning his attention back to Taehyung with a dangerous growl.

"Jungkook!" You snapped at him this time, desperately trying to keep your wits when Taehyung threatened to completely sweep you away in utter bliss. His tongue was currently lapping at your entrance while his nose rubbed unintentionally against your clit. It all felt so fucking amazing and you wanted to lose yourself to it, but you couldn't let Jungkook attack him.

Jungkook looked up at you again, huffing in irritation, but you held his gaze steadily.

"Come up here," you told him, and he glanced at Taehyung for a moment before looking back at you with a whine. "Come on, Jungkook."

So he stole one last lick on your inner thigh before he moved up your body, licking across your nipple on his way up. You gripped his jaw then, pulling his head up to yours and smashing your mouths together.

For a moment, you actually kissed, mouths moving together like well-oiled engine. But it didn't take long until Jungkook was shoving his tongue passed your lips and licking frantically at the wet cavern. You moaned into his mouth at the taste of yourself on his tongue and then shifted your hips when Taehyung began pressing forward in order to lick as deeply as possible into your entrance.

Jungkook was half-way hovering over you now, resting his weight on his hip and in the perfect position for you to reach down into his pants and take his impossibly hard cock into your hand. Immediately, before you could even move your hand, he was bucking his hips into the tight grip in search of relief.

Taehyung had also moved to where his hips were straddling your leg slightly so he could start rubbing his clothed cock against you.

Now, they were both rocking their hips into you for relief and the motions were driving you abolustely insane. They made you feel so dirty and used and suddenly, you wanted to flip yourself over and let them have at you. Let them pound your ass until you were turned into a crying, screaming mess.

"'Wanna breed you," Jungkook murmured into your mouth gruffly, trying so hard to fuck into your hand roughly for some satisfaction, but there was no way he was going to get any in this position. He needed to be inside of you, with your tight wet heat suctioned around him.

"Yeah?" You moaned in between his incessant licks and kisses. "Wanna breed me, baby? Wanna fill me up and knot me?"

The filthy questions earned you a growl from Jungkook and he nipped at your bottom lip sharply, making you wince slightly as your eyebrows knitted together.

"Turn over. Want that ass in the air for me." He pulled away, giving you room to obey. "Gonna fuck my bitch so good. Fill her up with my pups." He was almost talking to himself at this point, so ready to fuck you as he quickly removed his pants and jerked his shirt over his head.

The only problem though was Taehyung, who was still languidly licking at you and rubbing himself against your leg. In his own little world. But when you made the move to turn over, he immediately caught on to what you were doing and sat back in excitement. His tail wagging as he rushed to remove his clothing.

Getting onto your knees and resting your weight on your forearms was an easy enough task. But it's the chaos that followed the action, where it all turned difficult.

Taehyung tried to move in behind you out of instinct, but a vicious growl tore from Jungkook's chest and he jumped to intercept the other's movement. With his brute strength, Jungkook wrestled and pinned Taehyung to the bed by his shoulders, growling and snapping in warning less than an inch away from his neck.

"My bitch, do you understand me? Stay the fuck away from her." Jungkook snarled, and even being human you could almost feel the domineering, intimidating pheromones that were echoing off of his body, so you could only imagine how affected Taehyung was by them. If you weren't in the bedroom with your ass in the air, you would stand up for Tae, but you knew better than to get into the middle of what was going on. When it came to breeding, Jungkook's word was law. He got first go.

Taehyung was positively terrified, ears flattened into his hair and eyes squeezed shut with his neck bared in submission. He whined in fear. "You don't touch until I say you can touch. And that won't be until after I pump her full and knot her up, so know your fucking place." And just to drive his point home and really get Taehyung to listen, Jungkook opened his mouth and rested his canines on the thin skin of Taehyung's neck. A dangerous warning. And then he removed them, snarling once more as he backed up off of the other hybrid and turned his attention back to what mattered.

You.

Jungkook sniffed at the air and then let out a satisfied huff when he smelt your arousal, the tantalizing aroma going straight to his cock and making it throb as he moved into position behind you.

You shuddered in anticipation when you felt the weight and heat of his body behind you and it was no surprise when you felt his strong  hands grip your hips and begin jostling your body into his desired position. When he was done there was a deep arch in your back and your ass was poised perfectly in the air for him and it delighted you knowing how badly the sight probably drove him insane.

Seeing you completely offering yourself up to him, like his good little bitch. Your stomach twisted fiercely when he growled in approval at the sight of you and began lining his cock up with your entrance. Before he pushed in, he looked over his shoulder back at Taehyung and snarled, not even liking the other hybrid to be so close, but he was too desperate to be inside of you to care much about it.

As he pushed in, you bit your lip and held your breath, hand clutching the sheets in front of you in order to keep yourself grounded. The intense stretch of his girth stung, but it was expected and you knew it wouldn't last long. As soon as he would start thrusting, your body would adjust and open up perfectly for him, accepting his thickness eagerly.

"Fuck," you squeaked out breathlessly when he bottomed out with a thump and you listened to him breathe heavily through his nose behind you, most likely taking in this moment and gathering himself before he began plowing into you.

Jungkook draped himself over you, nuzzling through your hair in order to find your ear. For a moment he just breathed into it, making your heart beat frantically in your chest out of anticipation on what he was going to do next, and then he poked his tongue out to lave over it before tugging the lobe between his teeth with a growl.

"So wet and tight, my bitch feels so good," and he emphasized the last word with a deliberate roll of his hips that ended with a firm smack into your ass. The feeling was absolutely delicious.

And before you knew it, his hips began moving in a consistent motion. Quick little thrusts that you knew would only build in intensity over time. But right now, they were small and almost soft, yet had enough speed to have your ass jiggling every time his hips met it.

You could hear Taehyung behind you whining and moving around on the bed aimlessly, not knowing what to do with himself and the unbearable urge to fuck. You wanted to feel bad for him, but the steady, perfectly consistent rhythm of Jungkook's thrusts wouldn't allow you. You were already so fucking gone. The way Jungkook was fucking you right now could get you to cum without you even thinking about having to touch your clit. That's how good it was.

Jungkook reached underneath you and slipped one of his hands up your stomach all the way up to your breast, squeezing it and then tweaking the nipple with his fingers. "Perfect tits, baby. Can't wait to see 'em all full and leaking of milk for our pups." He growled dangerously then, his thrusts intensifying, shifting to the next level effortlessly.

"Yes, Kookie," you moaned out loudly, clenching around his cock from the filthy words shamelessly tumbling out of his mouth.

Honestly, you were pretty sure it wasn't possible for you to get pregnant by them, which was why you never worried about condoms or birth control. It's not like you were positively for certain, but you just figured since you were technically different species, you wouldn't be biologically compatible like that. But you had to admit, one of your deepest, darkest filthiest fantasies was quitting your job and just staying with your ass in the air all day everyday for them to take turns breeding you over and over again. Being their personal little pup-maker, like they'd probably love for you to be.

But that was a fantasy, and you tried to keep the sex with them under control because they were pretty much always horny and would be perfectly happy just spending their whole day fucking you. The instinct to reproduce was strong within them and always present, making it hard for them to see you in an innocent light sometimes. Like when you'd bend over to pick something up or tie your shoe, they'd see it as an opportunity to mount you from behind. Or when you'd be their little spoon while cuddling, they would be hyper-aware of their crotch pressed up against your ass and then get aroused and try to have sex.

Don't get you wrong though, you were a young healthy woman with a strong sex drive of your own that had no problems indulging two handsome hybrid's insatiable obsession. But sometimes, you had to be rational and refuse them or else you'd never get anything done throughout the day.

This time of the month however, when your ovulation cycle began to run its course, you knew that you had to surrender yourself to their incessant desire, at least until after it wasn't so strong to them. Because one time during one of your ovulation cycles you had a bad cold and did not feel like having sex at all, so you rejected all of their advances and quickly found out that it was physically painful for them when they could feel such a strong urge and pull towards you but couldn't do anything about it. It was so unbearable in fact that you ordered and expressed shipped from the internet a pheromone mask, a spray that you spritzed all over your body and masked the strong scent that you were sending out to Jungkook and Taehyung. It helped eased the sexual urge for them, but they were still clingy and didn't leave your side throughout the whole cycle.

You still had that spray, and kept it for emergencies, but you chose to deal with your cycle naturally most of the time and let them fuck you like they wanted. It was easier to just let it happen, rather than make sure you put the spray on again every hour to keep it effective. Plus, you really had no issues about dealing with it naturally when you could. And it was a Friday, so you had the next two days off and were free to spend them right here in this very bed if need be.

Your train of thought suddenly rerouted back to the present when Jungkook sat back onto his heels and gripped your hips in his strong hold, before pounding into you harder than before. Driving his hips into you with the sole purpose to get himself off and fill you up to the brim with his seed and knot.

You gasped, mouth hanging open in a silent scream and you gripped the covers beneath you, pulling up on them before pressing your forehead into the mattress. You were so wrecked beyond basic thought, that you didn't even notice Taehyung was now beside you. Glancing over at him, you saw him staring intently at where you and Jungkook were connected, the wet and sloppy sight of Jungkook's cock pistoning in and out of you and the obvious stretch you were having to endure in order to accommodate him. Taehyung's hand was wrapped around his cock, so tightly that his knuckles were white and he whined, frowning.

"T-Tae," you tried to speak, but Jungkook was fucking you so roughly your whole body was jostling with his thrusts and making it hard to even get a word out.

Taehyung's ears twitched at the sound of his name, but he couldn't pull his eyes away from the sight they were glued on.

You wanted to jerk him off, taking pity on him, but when you began reaching back for his cock, Jungkook growled in disapproval and suddenly draped himself back over your body. One hand holding his weight up on the bed and the other going to rest on your stomach.

He pressed his hand into your lower stomach and growled lowly in your ear. The pressure was tantalizing, emphasing the feel of his cock rubbing against your walls from within.

"My pups are gonna be in here. Mine, you're my bitch." He decided to remind you once again and the sharpest stab of arousal made your stomach clench from the reminder, and it was also that moment when you felt the familiar sting down at your entrance. The tell tale sensation of his knot beginning to form.

It was that added stretch whenever he would shove his knot passed your entrance and then pull it back out. It would catch on your entrance the more it grew but he would just thrust especially hard to fit it in and then yank his hips back to pop it back out and repeat the process.

This was the part where it was clear you were not made to take a hybrid's cock, even though whenever you'd voice that realization, Jungkook and Taehyung were quick to assure you that whenever you got pregnant with their pups they would be able to fit through your vagina so technically their knot should be no problem for you to handle.

Needless to say, even if that was true, it was definitely easier said than done.

"Jungkook!" You cried out, feeling that familiar urge to tap out as you buried your face in the covers. But despite the pain, your stomach still swirled warmly in the direction of a release and oddly enough, the arousal and pain blended into something delicious and overwhelming.

And then, Jungkook gave the hardest thrust yet and popped his knot into your entrance, the action causing you to gasp sharply. But you knew this time, it was in you to stay. Because Jungkook didn't try to yank his hips back like before, instead he grind into you with a purpose, hips flushed with your ass.

The swirling warmth in the pit of your stomach began to intensify at how full you felt, and not to mention you could feel the way his knot rubbed snugly against your walls and hitting every sugary spot you could imagine.

No human man could ever make you feel this way.

And just the thought of that, coupled with the incredible feeling of being filled to the brim, was enough to send you spiraling into the most sweetest high. The feeling of heaven flushing throughout your limbs and caressing your stomach and lower back, making your toes curl and mouth pop open as you welcomed it with fervor.

The sensation of your walls clenching and clenching and your thighs quivering in an attempt to keep yourself up was what finally coaxed Jungkook into coming. Releasing his thick seed deep within you as his chest rumbled with a deep content growl, his face nuzzling into your temple and hips continuing to move in small little grind to milk himself dry inside of you.

There was so much cum, he was still releasing into you and it always amazed you how completely stuffed you were afterwards. Filled up completely by Jungkook, every inch inside of you.

"Fuck," you whimpered, letting out a shaky breath and the small little noise made Jungkook wrap both arms around your middle in an attempt to comfort you as he lapped at your face, but you were now supporting both of your weight and you let out a helpless noise at the pressure on your upper body. "Jungkook, please you're squishing me,"

And he gave you one last lick before placing his hands back onto the bed and picking his weight up off of you.

You looked back over your shoulder at him, wondering what he looked like after such an intense fuck since you basically never had sex facing each other. You always had to be on your hands and knees, in the proper breeding position, Taehyung and Jungkook proclaimed.

The sight nearly made you orgasm all over again. Sweat soaked his hairline and was dripping down the sides of his face, coupled with hooded eyes and parted lips as he breathed heavily from the previous exertion. There was a slight furrow between his eyebrows, making him look like the sexiest thing you've ever witnessed. And as if the whole thing couldn't get better, he tilted his head back slightly and sniffed at the air, hips twitching afterwards.

"Smells good. Just like it always does when my bitch gets bred."

You moaned, feeling fucking aroused all over again because of Jungkook and his damn filthy, blatant words.

When you propped yourself up back onto your elbows, your sore knees were brought to your attention and you were just about to ask Jungkook if he could arrange you two on your sides like usual but thats when you suddenly felt something.

Something little and faint down at your entrance, that was there and gone within a quick second.

Jungkook suddenly went tense above you and then you felt it again. This time, you realized it was wet and warm, prodding and swiping around the area tentatively.

"Taehyung," you suddenly said with a shaky exhale. Not asking for his attention, but just voicing your realization that the odd sensation was him.

He was positioned behind you and Jungkook, head angled between your legs in order to lap around your sensitive center. He always did this after Jungkook knotted you, enjoying the new juices that your climaxes provided while also offering his numbing/healing saliva. Aiding with any soreness you felt, but it was mainly for Jungkook. Whenever you couldn't feel Taehyung's tongue, you knew he had veered off to the base of Jungkook's cock and was licking at the little part of his knot that could be seen from inside of your vagina. Their knots were always sensitive and sore afterwards so they would help each other out and lick them to ease the dull ache since they couldn't reach their own.

Jungkook released a deep breath, his body seeming to relax along with it. He crowded you forwards and then dropped his weight down onto his hip on the mattress, moving the two of you so you would be on your sides.

Taehyung whined at the loss, trying to follow the irresistible taste and Jungkook just rolled his eyes tiredly when he got you both situated and then he slipped his hand under your inner thigh so he could heft your leg into the air that way for Taehyung. The eldest hybrid re-positioned himself and dove back in, licking at you both once more eagerly.

You were so exhausted all of the sudden, Jungkook always did a number on you when you fucked. It was go big or go home for him all the time when it came to sex, which you had no complaints about whatsoever. But golly, it sure tired you out.

Practically numb to Taehyung's tongue at this point, you just rested your head on the pillow and gazed tiredly down at him working, enjoying the feeling of both of your lovers so close to you.

And before you knew it, your eyes were slipping closed and the last thing you remembered before dozing off was Jungkook growling softly and easing your leg down, telling Taehyung to let you rest.

You awoke to the sun shining straight into your eyes and you moaned, turning your head away from the light. But the innocent morning sunlight was definitely not what roused you from sleep, and quite frankly, not what made you moan either.

Opening one eye and peeking down, you saw a mop of brown hair between your legs, fluffy ears perked up.

"Taehyung," you whispered, biting your lip and frowning at the over-sensitivity of his tongue lapping at your clit.

Realizing you were awake, he looked up at you and his tail began to wag in excitement. He pulled himself up, whining and your eyes fell to the large bulge in his pajama pants.

His hips stuttered, seeking out friction.

"Please, before Jungkook wakes up," he pleaded desperately, giving you the literal puppy dog eyes as the cherry on top.

You yawned, stretching your muscles and wondering how the hell you allowed those eyes to have such a strong effect on you as you rolled over onto your knees. You kept your head on the pillow, hugging it and closing your eyes, feeling Taehyung moving around behind you.

Good morning world, you thought humorously as you arched your back and poked your ass into the air.

[floralicious]

in the frosty air

This is my gift for the LBMR Secret Santa! Thanks to @askalfendilayton​ for arranging the whole thing! 

My gift is for the wonderful @dont-drop-your-ascots

Now without further ado...

crossposted on ao3

Rating: General Audiences

-

Florence wheeled into Alfendi Layton’s office looking like a woman on a mission. Her hair was tied back, lab coat buttoned, and there were smudges of ink on her hands and face. She rolled over to Alfendi’s desk and slammed her hands onto the small part not covered with papers.

“Al, you’ve gotta help me,” Florence said, very nearly out of breath. “Christmas party. Will the Commissioner be there or not?”

Alfendi blinked at her from where he was sitting. “Pardon?”

“I need to know if Barton will be at the holiday party. Because if he’s there, I need to get him a nice gift. Stay in his good- achoo!” Florence sat back in her chair and pulled a tissue from the box on the desk in front of her.

“Oi, Flo!”

Florence nearly fell onto the floor. Lucy Baker had at some point materialized behind her, and was walking over with a bottle of hand sanitizer.

“It’s cold season, ya know. Gotta stay healthy!” Lucy said. “Nice decorations, by the way.” She touched the few layers of tinsel draped around Florence’s chair. Lucy then handed the family-sized bottle to Florence and disappeared to some dank corner of the small office.

A dry smile appeared on Alfendi’s face. “Lucy, you don’t need to mother everyone who comes in the office,” he said, glancing at the place to which Lucy had disappeared.

“I can and shall, Prof!”

“Much appreciated, Lu,” Florence said with a cursory glance to Lucy’s corner. She turned back to Alfendi and pumped some sanitizer.

“Florence, all I can tell you is that Barton is always at the party, which you know. What’s the real reason you’re here?” said Alfendi.

“I told you. Need a gift. For the Commissioner. Any ideas?”

“And this wouldn’t have anything to do with the new position in forensics opening up?”

“No!” she said, indignant. “If you must know-” Florence leaned as far as she could across the desk and lowered her voice- “I bet Sniffer 20 pounds that I can get Barton the best present ever.”

“That’s really not a big deal. The Commissioner just likes getting gifts, I don’t think he’s that hard to buy for,” said Alfendi. He pulled a snow globe sitting on his desk towards him. It depicted a snowman wearing sunglasses lounging by a sunny shore, and there were assorted beachy snowpeople decorating the base. Florence stared at the relaxing snowman as Alfendi picked up the snow globe and began to turn a key, causing a tinkling rendition of some Christmas standard she didn’t recognize to play.

Florence thought he must be intrigued by her problem if he picked up a snow globe instead of his paperwork. Or maybe just bored, but she really needed the help.

“Please, Al. It’s a matter of pride. Losing a bet to Sniffer Hague? No chance in hell.”

The snow globe stopped playing. Florence finally placed the tune- ‘Jingle Bell Rock.’

Alfendi put it back down on his desk and stood up. “Let’s go,” he said. “We’re getting lunch, then we’re both getting presents for Barton. Lucy, you coming with?”

“Can’t- already have lunch plans,” piped Lucy. She materialized again from whichever corner she was hiding in. She gave her boss an apologetic glance. “Have fun, you two.”

“Bye, Lucy, have fun with your plans,” Florence called over her shoulder. She had already wheeled halfway out the door.

-

“You can always do what I’m doing and get the Commissioner a gift card to a fancy restaurant,” said Alfendi. He was walking next to Florence along the pavement lining the shopping center. A brisk wind blew at the duo’s ponytails as they traversed the multitude of stores. A few inches of snow lay on the ground, turning quickly to slush with all the passers-by.

“We can’t get him the same thing, Al. Then Hague will know you helped.” Florence looked in the window of each store they passed, noting the various Christmas displays. She didn’t note the people staring at her lab coat and dirty face.

Alfendi stuck his hands in his coat pockets. “I don’t know. Writing pad? Fountain pen? Silverware? Gift card to a different fancy restaurant?”

Florence kept her eyes peeled. Skincare, no. Furniture, no. Creepy elf animatronic, a resounding no. Pots and pans-

“Hold it.” She froze.

“What?”

“What if…” She looked up to meet Alfendi’s eyes. “What if I made him food? Like his favorite dessert or something?”

He considered the idea.

“Florence Sich… You are a genius. Nothing Sniffer comes up with can beat that,” Alfendi said. They resumed their walk, this time in the direction of the Yard. Florence stopped gazing into every store display and focused on where she was going.

“What does the Commissioner like?” she asked.

“Hmm. Well, I know he’s not one for delicate dishes. But he loves a good sweet nonetheless. Maybe you could try giving him a pie of some sort?”

“I can’t cook, though. Nor can I bake. Al, any chance you know how to make haute cuisine?” She grimaced.

“I’m decent at baking, but nowhere near as good as you want to be to meet Barton’s standards,” he said, shaking his head. “But I know someone who can help. Do you know my sister Flora? Go see her, she’ll know what to do.”

“I hope so. I need all the help I can get.” The pair had reached Alfendi’s nearby car. They drove back to the Yard in the snow. Never had Florence been more grateful for the coat she had received from one aunt or another at some birthday. It may have been bulky and inconvenient, but it was functional in the old car with a broken heating system.

When they reached their workplace, Florence was no less frazzled than she was when the trip had started. Alfendi reached across her and took a pen and notepad from his glove compartment.

“Here’s the address,” he said, scribbling. “Flora will be there pretty much anytime before 6 pm. Just explain that you need to cook something and she’ll help you out.” He ripped out the piece of paper and offered it to Florence. She accepted the proffered address and made a mental note to stop by the place after work. “Thanks for your help, Al. I’m sure you’ll know whether I’m up 20 pounds or not after the holiday party.”

“Always a pleasure, Florence. Are we still on for coffee with Lucy next week?”

“Yup, yup. Have to go, Al, duty calls.” And with that, Florence was off to work.

-

Florence knocked on the thick wooden door. It was marked by a metal nameplate reading ‘Professor Layton.’

The address Alfendi gave Florence had led her to a small university she had considered applying to in her youth, out in the country. She found herself surrounded by old-fashioned wood and brick and young students milling around the campus. Unfortunately, the old building was filled with dust and rendered her considerably more sneezy than usual.

“Professor Layton?” she called. With no response, she tried the door handle. It was unlocked, so Florence entered. The office was lit warmly, and in a corner Florence noticed a desk. It was considerably neater than the one she had been staring down earlier that day.

Behind the desk sat a woman. Florence couldn’t see her face, as she was slumped over in sleep. Brown hair fanned out over her desk and around her shoulders.

Florence wondered if it would be rude to wake the woman. Probably not, she decided. Flora had looked kind in all the pictures Alfendi had sitting on his desk.

She tapped the woman on the shoulder. “Professor Layton?” she said again. “Professor Layton. Are you alright?” She sneezed into her elbow.

Flora sat up with a start. “What? Hmm?” She rubbed at her eyes. “Pardon me, but who are you?”

“I’m- achoo!- Florence Sich, Professor. I work with Alfendi. I was under the impression you could help me with something. It’s quite nice to finally meet you in person.”

“Oh!” said Flora. She pulled at a piece of hair that had escaped her tight ponytail. “Yes, I do remember a message from Al about that. You need to make the Commissioner a Christmas treat?”

The scientist fiddled with her coat buttons. “Yes… I’ve got a bet that I can get him the best Christmas gift. Achoo!” The place was really quite dusty.

“Bless you! So, what do you have in mind? Last I saw him, the Commissioner favored fruits… how about a fruit tart? That shouldn’t be exceptionally difficult. When can you give it to him?”

“I need it by next Friday. Can you teach me how to bake by then?” Florence asked.

“Let’s see.” Flora turned around in her desk chair to look at a calendar hanging on the wall behind her. “I’m free this Sunday morning at 11. Can you come over then and I’ll teach you? I can have Al send you my home address.”

“Would you really do that? Help me?”

“A true gentlewoman always helps a person in need,” Flora said. “Any friend of Alfendi is a friend of mine anyway. So will I see you on Sunday?”

Florence nodded eagerly. “Yes! I’ll see you then. Thank you so much, Professor. You don’t know how much this helps.”

Flora laughed. “Call me Flora, dear. I’ve made a few wagers in my life. I hope you win this one.”

-

“Gah! Why is baking so difficult?” Florence grimaced at the sight of the sugar all over her hands. She was in Flora’s kitchen, which smelled profusely of vanilla and butter. Flora stood next to her. Ingredients were spread all over the counter and Florence thought she must have a piece of every single one on the apron she had borrowed.

“Focus, Florence,” Flora said. “The cream is the hardest part. Once you get past this it’ll be smooth sailing.”

“I’m just worried about this- achoo!- party,” Florence said. “It’s not about the bet anymore. I actually want to make the Commissioner a nice gift. This year’s been a rough one for the Yard.”

Flora slowly poured cream into her bowl and began to mix with vigor, and Florence copied her. “Try to put all of that behind you. As long as you focus on the baking, I promise you it will turn out well and Commissioner Barton will love it,” said Flora.

“In fact, I was never much for cooking myself when I was young. Alfendi can attest to that. But with a few years of practice and a healthy dose of passion, I was able to make all sorts of good things. I bet it was sort of the same thing for you and detective work, huh?”

Florence sighed, pouring another ingredient in. “Yeah, but I’m a scientist, not a detective. You’d think I’d be good at this, dealing with measurements like I do.”

“Who said you weren’t good at baking?” Flora set down her own bowl and crossed her arms. “Look at what you’ve got there. That’s perfect!”

Florence looked down. “Huh,” she said. Her eyes widened. “Really? Is it okay?”

“It’s more than okay,” Flora said as she pulled their tart shells out of the oven, where they had sat for fifteen minutes. “It’s wonderful. And if you made this on your first try, being nervous, there’s no way you can’t recreate it next week.”

“Thank you!” Florence said. “Professor Layton, you are my Christmas miracle.”

Flora was beaming. “It’s always a pleasure to help, especially during this season! Now let’s finish these tarts!”

The pair finished the next couple steps with minimal difficulty. When they were done, Florence was dumbfounded at the neat appearance of her own creation. It looked too pretty to be something she had made, given the recent state of her affairs in the busy season. She thanked Flora over and over again before leaving.

“So will I be seeing you again soon?” she asked Flora.

“Sure thing, dear. I’ll make sure to drop by the party at some point. Have a lovely week!”

-

The Yard Holiday Party was by no means extravagant. This year it was held in a back room at the yard, as per the usual. It had been decorated nicely by someone. Probably Lucy, Florence thought, given the woman’s penchant for fairy lights. They were strung up on every table, around the walls, the tree, and even some people.

Tables with chairs were scattered sporadically across the small room, and a tree stood in the corner. It was done up with tinsel and paper clip garlands, courtesy of some bored Yard employees. Lights reflected off of red baubles hung precariously from the branches of the tree.

Various holiday sweaters abounded- from Dustin’s light-up Rudolph face to the Deputy Commissioner’s sparkly Christmas tree. Florence herself was wearing a simple red dress. Amidst the sea of sweaters she spotted Lucy wrapping a string of lights around Alfendi’s arm.

Florence went to where they were standing. “Have you seen Barton?” she asked, anxious to give him the treat she carried. “Oh! Looking good, Lucy.”

Lucy had switched her newsboy cap out for a Santa one covered in bells, and was wearing an atrocious fur-trimmed glittery sweater. Alfendi had obviously suffered a few hugs, being covered in glitter himself. “Cheers, Flo! Happy holidays!” said Lucy as she offered Florence a cup of cider. She took it and gulped down some in the hopes that it would distract her from the task at hand.

Alfendi offered her a jingle bell, presumably fallen off of Lucy’s hat.

“For good luck,” he said. Florence took it and tucked it into her purse. Alfendi smiled and pointed to the center of the room. “I think Barton’s over there. But Sniffer’s with him, so don’t let him get to you!”

“Thanks, Al. I’d better be off before Hague starts to sabotage me.” Florence carried her tart to the Commissioner himself. “Sir?” she ventured once near enough to give it to him. “This would be for you. Made it myself.”

The Commissioner took the treat Florence offered. “Ms. Sich, you didn’t have to get me anything,” he said. “And look- my favorite type of tart! My friend Layton used to make some just like this, you know.”

Sniffer Hague stood right next to Barton, upset that his conversational efforts to win him over had been interrupted. “Is that so, sir?” he asked, winking at Florence.

She was silent. The Commissioner paused, and everything seemed to slow down around the three. “Well, of course it doesn’t beat the signed cookbook you got me, but a homemade treat from the heart is really something special. Here, sit down.” He dragged Florence and Sniffer to a nearby table. “Let’s eat this right now!”

A crowd gathered around the table as the tart was cut into and eaten. “Merry Christmas, everybody!” said the Commissioner.

“Heh. 20 pounds to me…” Sniffer muttered to Florence.

“Delicious, Ms. Sich!” the Commissioner snuffled through a piece of tart. Sniffer picked up his own piece and started eating.

She flashed a genuine smile at the Commissioner. If she couldn’t win a bet, at least she had given Barton something he genuinely liked. She supposed that made the difficulty worth it. Still… all that effort for basically nothing.

She glared at Sniffer. “ I learned to bake just for this, you know,” she said.

“Really? That’s dedication,” he said, looking impressed. Bits of cream dotted his nose. “And this is really, really good. I guess I’ll let the money slide. But only because this is amazing, and because it’s Christmas.” Sniffer and Florence shook hands and smiled.

“Merry Christmas, Hague,” Florence caid.

“Merry Christmas, Sich.”

“Oi! You two! Over here!” They both looked over to where Lucy was calling them. “Let’s dance!” she said.

“I would rather not!” Florence shouted back.

‘Jingle Bell Rock’ was blaring from an unseen speaker. Lucy shrugged and started dancing with a somewhat reluctant Alfendi. After a verse or two, they pushed through the crowd to sit with Florence and her companion.

“So? Who won?” Alfendi asked eagerly. “Sniffer called it off!” Florence said with a triumphant flourish. “Did I ever tell you your sister was a Christmas miracle, Alfendi?”

“I take that to mean that Hague won?” he said. He was grinning from ear to ear.

Hague nodded. “Sich here just put so much effort into this bet. Had’ta throw it. It is the season of giving, after all. Here, try some of her tart.” He pushed a plate towards Alfendi and Lucy.

“Well then, here’s a gift for you.” Florence placed the bell Alfendi gave her into Sniffer’s hand.

“Yes! A true reconciliation,” Lucy said. “Now, can we please rock around some Christmas trees?” The music got louder, and rock they did.

end

Bonus moodboard baby! Happy holidays!

[blackrosesfanfic]

Chapter 205

Trey

Damn them kids need to fucking hurry up. Acting like a fucking bitch now. I sigh and stand up. I'm just going to go to the store for something stupid. There's a store close by that I can go to without drama and a bodyguard. I'll go shop at the organic market.

"I'm sorry." Cammie says then chuckles.

"Huh?" What I'm really saying is, you in my head.

She sighs deeply. "Just go for a walk. Go."

I scrunch the right side of my face. "I wasn't even going to..."

"Tremaine, shut up. I know I'm being aggravating. I can't sleep anymore. Your dick just makes me want to throw up. I don't want to be in the hot tub. I just want my babies. Are you going to walk or keep listening to me talk? I can complain all fucking day. I miss Caden's little feet. He has little feet like you."

"Alright. Imma walk."

She struggles under the cover hugging the damn thing. It's Lane's fucking blanket from his bed that he takes a nap with. Fucking ridiculous. I close the front door slowly looking at her. She crazy right now. I stop at the stop sign and lean against it. It's hot ass shit out here. I don’t know which direction I want to walk. I should have got the dog so I could walk him to the park. But I ain't going out there without a dog then I would have to listen to little old ladies talk only about their dog. They get offended when I say I left my dog.

"Tremaine?"

"Hmm?" I say turning around.

April was walking around a car. She frowns at me then she opens the door. Lane jumps out of the car dragging his bag. Little bad ass boy had the biggest smile on his face. Damn I missed the shit out of my son. I step closer then kneel as he runs to me.

"Daddy. What you doing?" He says looking around. "Way Mommy?"

"At home waiting."

April closes the door. "He starts yelling daddy and trying to stand up out of his seat. I didn't know what was wrong with him. What are you doing?"

"It was either take a walk or be in the house with that crazy thang who waiting on her boys."

"Daddy, go that way." Lane says pointing.

April walks back around the car. "Well Lane decided he wanted to drink Caden's last bottle while I was dozing off on the way here. Caden also decided he wanted to be extra hungry on the airplane. I guess he was nervous like his brother."

"We on the way down there."

"Hurry because I dont have time to explain to your wife why you were more important than her."

I bounce Lane up in the air. "Let's go see, Mommy. Want to walk?"

"No." He says holding on tight.

"You want to see Mommy?"

He points. "That way."

"Oh King is at the house."

"Exactly why I'm dropping them off and going to Chris' where there is only one baby."

"Chris not even in LA."

April waves her hand. "I don't hear you."

I start walking back to the house. Lane was talking about the houses as we walked by each of them. I listen to what he is saying.

"White. White. Blue. Black."

I pause looking back at the houses we passed. He was talking about the door of the houses. I keep walking. When he sees our door he points to it. Damn, he knows how the house looks? He claps his hand.

"Brown."

"Little me? How do you know your colors so well?"

He sees April. "Nanma?"

"Come on and see Mommy." April says waving him to her. She peeks back into the house. "He is right there."

"Mommy?" He says pushing against me.

I let him down. "Did you know he knows what brown is?"

"That's the first color he learned because people are brown. He knows people are brown and white."

"That's fucking racist."

"Shut up, Tremaine."

I chuckle. "You said Lane drinks Caden's milk?"

She rolls her eyes. "I think he does it on purpose. He knows he isn't supposed to drink it. But she let's the boy breastfeed so I can't argue with him. He also drinks it in his cup at home. Did you know that?"

"I didn't know that Ma." I say walking into the house. "Where is Caden?"

"Here go Caden!" Lane tells grabbing his face. "Daddy, King sleep!"

"Lane." Cammie says tapping his hand lightly. "Let go of his face."

Lane grabs his chest. "Ouch."

Cammie frowns. "Don't even play. Look Daddy got you a present. Go open it."

Lane stays right where he is and puts. Cammie rolls her eyes and turn him around. They can't wait to get together so they can get on each other's nerves. He knows what he is doing. Two seconds after she touches him he starts screaming like she popped him. He fake ass shit. I sit down near his gift.

"Lane?"

"I no want to." He pouts looking at Cammie.

She rolls her eyes. "What do you want me to do stop feeding your brother and do what for you?"

He stares at her. "No, brother."

"So you were in love with Caden at your grandma house but now he not your brother. You gonna do him like that? Move."

"My brother." He says grabbing his head.

"Get off his head."

Lane snatches his body away from her. "My brother."

"Lane, I love you."

He runs away. "King!"

I shake my head. "You drove me crazy for that?"

"That's Lane being sweet." Ma says. "I'm gone. Be back in 5 minutes."

"Where are you even going?" Cammie snaps.

"I'll be right back. Calm down."

Cammie rolls her eyes. "Okay, April."

Ma laughs. "I'm not even dealing with anymore of Lane. Lord this girl. Help her."

"Way the food?" Lane yells. He cuts his eyes at the front door. "Nanma!"

"I'll be back."

He falls out on the ground. "Wait!"

"Lane, come here. Look at this." I say taking the PJ Mask car out of the box.

He tells really loud out of anger looking at Ma. She continues out of the door like he wasn't acting like a fool. Lane kicks the air then he walks over to me pouting. He still mad but he more interested in the car. He stands there blinking his eyes.

"Tremaine?" Cammie says fixing up her shirt. "Come get Caden."

"You don't like the car?" I ask Lane.

He shifts his weight to one side then starts playing with his stomach. This boy sleepy as hell. April straight ignored the shit out of him. He highly upset about that. I put the car on the floor. He is interested but saying to shit with your car at the same time. So I just take Caden from Cammie. He was limp. Sleeping hard like there was no tomorrow. I sit down on the couch with him.

"Daylan!" Cammie snaps.

I look up from Caden. Cammie stands up just enough to reach Lane. She pulls him to her. He was acting stank with her. He resisted all until she had him close to her chest. He starts pouting again then hugs her with his face in her chest. Yo, that shit is real. Mommy's boys. It's a bad look. He needs to man up. I chuckle. She hums and rocks him hard.

"You missed Mommy? I know. I know." She looks at me suddenly. "Tremaine, fix whatever going on with you and Chris. I know you started it."

"You sure about that?"

She tilts her head. "I'm positive because Chris and Amber got him in a better place. You still fucked up."

I narrow my eyes at her. She rolls her eyes. "Okay. I give you that."

"You might need him. That's all I'm saying. He needs you to heal completely. You too selfish suddenly?"

"I said I would fix it."

"Did you?" She snaps.

Lane turns his head looking at me. I smile at him. "I will fix it, Jayla."

"Simply put."

"Way the food, Mommy?" Lane says again.

She chuckles. "You hungry, man?"

Lane puts his hand down her shirt. "It in  the kitchen?"

"Yes, get out my shirt." She hits his hand away. "That's why my others don't fit now."

"I get it." Lane says climbing out her lap.

I chuckle. "Welcome home."

She kisses my forehead. "Right."

  Chris

Amber reaches across me picking up my phone. I didn't bother to look to see who was calling. I have Cammie and Trey set to the same ringtone. I know it's one of them. I don't care about talking to either of them.

"Hello, Trey." Amber says smiling. "He right hear acting bitter."

"Well tell him that I'll be at the club tomorrow as agreed. We can dish it all out over a virgin martini. Lil bitch."

I reach for the phone. "How the fuck..."

I exhale. He had hung the phone up. I look at Amber. I don't know if that was supposed to be his apology or a fucking hint that he rather not see me tomorrow. I shrug it off. Fuck him. He think his shit don't stank. Nigga your fucking girl making your ass relevant right now.

"He a fucking bitch ass nigga. What the hell was that?"

"Huh?"

I suck my teeth. "Forget it."

She hits my thigh. "I'm saying Bae you went from nonchalant to slap a bitch."

"He keeps pissing me off then what do I do? Wag my tail and go right back to fall for the same shit?"

"Sounds like a female."

"Who?"

She sighs. "Fine dont go talk with him tomorrow. Get angry. Fuck up everything."

"Why does it even matter?"

"If you don't see how improving your life matters than it doesn't matter."

I suck my teeth. "I feel like you don't fucking like the person that I am. Everybody tries to fucking control me. Make me somebody else. What if this is me? What if there's nothing else to me?"

"Chris you can't be caring and big hearted but mean and destructive. That big hearted person has just been hurt too many times. All I'm trying to do is help you work out your anger issues. Hope you find peace. Fuck changing you. Who the hell am I trying to make you?"

"Yeah." I say walking out of the room. I turn around. "Why am I leaving out my room? You leave."

She chuckles. "You fuck yourself."

"You need to fucking change."

"Christopher, come say it to my damn face. Bring your ass over here."

I chuckle. "You want this dick?"

She pats the bed. "Get on your knees and suck my dick."

"You fucking tranny."

"In that case get on your knees and let me fuck the anger out of you."

"Yo." I say then laugh. "Filthy ass mouth."

She sticks her hand in her panties. "Yes, talk dirty to me."

"I'm going to get something to eat. Dirty pussy." I say grabbing my phone and wallet.

She giggles. "Minus well grab your papers and go to your meeting."

I snatch the papers off the bed. "Don't be here when I get back."

"Whatever, Chris Brown."

"Bitch." I say smiling after I turn away from her.

[adambstingus]

23 Men Reveal The Absolute WORST Sexual Experience Of Their Lives

Found on AskReddit.

1. Her false eye popped out and I felt it on my balls.

Met girl at rave. Went to cemetery. Getting beej, she deep throated, her false eye I was unaware of came out.

Felt it on my balls.

Yes.

2. There was a swamp-green streak in her panties that smelled like a fish’s asshole.

Was back in high school. Things were getting hot and heavy until I tried taking her pants off. There was a swamp-green streak in her panties that smelled like a fish’s asshole. We didn’t even get to the sex part and I still consider it the worst sex I’ve ever had. It still haunts me to this day.

3. My balls got tickled by her fart.

With my now ex-wife. Standard sexy-time up to a point (kissing, boob play, a little oral), then I go to put it in. She farts. I felt it tickle my balls.

It tickled my balls, man. You can’t keep going after that. I’m a nurse and not much grosses me out but…My balls got tickled by her fart.

4. I lay there….unspent and sad.

Does masturbation count? Im going to tell it anyways.

I was having a dry period of about a month. I woke up after a really vivid wet dream and tried to rub it out.

I proceeded to slip in and out of consciousness for a good ten minutes, rubbing it until it is hard, falling half asleep for a minute, waking up again, rubbing it again. After those ten minutes, I just gave up. I lay there….unspent and sad.

5. I was gagging the entire time.

Was quite drunk and in a miserable period in my life where I’d fuck just about anything. Hooked up with a neighbor’s friend. She had dreads. I was gagging the entire time. Barely managed to finish. Showered for what felt like an eternity after.

6. She shit right in my hand.

I pulled out to give myself a break, we were in the doggy position. I started fingering her and she started to orgasm. She shit right in my hand.

7. I threw up on her snatch.

I went down on a girl and it smelled exactly like an Arby’s cheddar melt. I threw up on her snatch, and that wasn’t a deal breaker for her. It just made her want it more. She knew I liked it a little rough, from previous conversations, and so she straight up launched herself, puke beef cootchie and all, right onto my face and starts grinding. I was so caught off be-fucking-wildered that I froze, internally screaming this is a bad dream. This has got to be a bad fucking dream. Meanwhile in grind town, the aroma of Arby’s and half-digested oatmeal smeared my face as I finally screamed in horror and ran out.

You try getting that out of your beard.

8. She insisted on watching while blowing me.

Ended up losing my virginity to my first girlfriend while watching I asked her if we could maybe turn it off, at which point she removed my penis from her mouth and said, But it’s my favorite movie?

9. It was like my penis rolled a sticky tear.

I had a pretty sad jerk off the other night.

I guess my heart wasn’t into it or something but the run up to the orgasm started fine but then it just became a chore. I kept thinking about other stuff. My arm was getting tired. I farted mid-way through and the smell was a distraction.

I start to cum and it immediately got soft and just like seeped out. No energy behind it at all. No happiness or excitement. It was like my penis rolled a sticky tear.

Then my dick was like a sad old drunk slumping into a puddle of his own sick. I just sat there all heavy with shame for a few seconds as this gif looping on my monitor that, with the haze of arousal fizzled, was just awkward and weird. All titties being mashed and slapped around like they owed someone money.

Then I got a sandwich and played Minecraft.

10. I found out in the most painful way that I was in fact too big for her once her teeth shredded my dick and filled her mouth with blood.

Was dating a girl a few years back and after a month of intense make out sessions and heavy petting we decided it was time to take things to the next level. It started off well enough when she pulled out my junk and exclaimed I was the biggest she’d seen, and she was proud of her ability to deep throat and was insistent she could take me on. So without any warm up at all she tries to shove my entire dry dick down her throat and I found out in the most painful way that I was in fact too big for her once her teeth shredded my dick and filled her mouth with blood. We didn’t get to the sex part due to my crying

11. I accidentally told a girl I loved her and proceeded to have awkward coitus.

I was once having sex with a girl I’d been dating for a few weeks. I thought she said I love you so I was like Oh I love you too but she actually just said something completely different. She stopped dead and questioned what I’d said, but I just said never mind and carried on. TL;DR I accidentally told a girl I loved her and proceeded to have awkward coitus.

12. She kindly informs me I wasn’t in and was rubbing between her ass cheeks and sheets the whole time.

First time I ever did it. I was thrusting hard and doing well, so I thought. Then she kindly informs me I wasn’t in and was rubbing between her ass cheeks and sheets the whole time. I almost came from that.

13. I banged a hoarder in the closet of her smelly apartment. Afterwards she fished an old condom out of her pussy.

So, Im at a bar and I start working on a girl. Shes pretty hot. We dance, we drink, we talk. She makes it pretty clear she wants to go back to my place. At one point, she was even joking how its been forever since she’s been laid.

Im only in town visiting a friend and crashing on his couch so I insist on going to her place. Initially she resists the idea but I elaborate on the couch thing, plus he lives super far away, he doesnt have a car so I dont know how she would get home, etc., etc. Eventually she caves.

She lives walking distance away in a pretty nice apartment building. We go up the elevator and when we get to her front door she warns me that she shares a 1 bedroom apartment with a roommate and that, Its a little bit messy.

She opens the door; we go in and Im slapped across the face with the stench of weeks-old garbage and a pile of dishes festering in the sink. I have no idea how someone could live with that smell emanating from their kitchen but perhaps even worse is the whole place looks like an episode of hoarders. Junk is everywhere. It covers every conceivable surface, and is several feet thick in some places with piles of laundry and random items littered across the floor.

At this point, a better man would have called it. Thanked her for the lovely evening and taken a very lonely but far more sanitary cab ride back home. But its been a while for me and shes probably the hottest chick Ive ever landed. So instead her and I waded through the piles of garbage to make our way to her bedroom.

She leads me to a windowless room that I can only describe as a closet. Its barely large enough for a single mattress, which is placed directly on the floor. We are surrounded on all sides by piles of junk and clothes but Im relieved to be away from the chaos and stink that is her kitchen.

We go in and I close the door behind us and we are plunged into blackness. There are no lights in the room. She fumbles around and says Just a second! while she rummages through her purse, takes out her cellphone, activates the flashlight app, and MacGyver’s the worlds saddest desk lamp by propping it up on a pile of dirty clothes.

We get down to business. At this point Im so thoroughly disgusted with myself that Im having trouble getting ready for action. Fortunately (or perhaps unfortunately), she sucks dick like a champ and we get things underway. I put on a condom and were off to the races. At this point all I want to do is blow my load and make my escape from this smelly dungeon.

Then she stops me: Wait a second I think the condom broke. My heart immediately seizes up and sinks to the pit of my stomach as I consider the possibility of being connected to this hot mess and her garbage dungeon for 18 years.

I withdraw and she sticks her finger into her pussy, fishes out a broken condom, and flings it at the wall. As shes rummaging through her trash heap looking for another condom I look down and I notice something. Im still wearing a condom And its totally intact.

tl;dr I banged a hoarder in the closet of her smelly apartment. Afterwards she fished an old condom out of her pussy.

14. I projectile-vomited from the realization I had been banging a 15-year-old for a month.

This one is sad and I’m disgusted with myself for a reason that will become clear. I was 21 and had been dating this girl who was 18. I met her mother and they were even talking about how they were planning her 19th birthday party and how she couldn’t believe how fast her little girl was growing up and her mom even said her daughter scored big time landing a handsome 21-year-old man yadda yadda. It was weird and felt like I was missing an inside joke. Fast forward a month and lots of pretty good sex.

We had left party at a beach house to fuck in my car. She gets sick and vomits at one point, super drunk, but thankfully she managed to vomit outside the car. We keep going at it, or trying to; I was drunk myself and drunk me and erections dont work so well, windows had fogged up and the car was rocking.

There’s a sharp knock at the window that I ignored, kept fucking. Then there’s another knock and its insistent. I get angry at this point and yell leave me alone, we are fucking! I thought it was a friend looking for us. Nope. I was met by a blinding light being shown and an obvious cop tone telling us to exit the vehicle.

Two cops were outside and asked if we were at the party because they had a noise complaint. Yup. I’m freaking out because she’s clearly wasted and she was only 18. I was 21 so I just knew I would be hit with a charge for supplying alcohol to an underage person. The dreaded question comes up. How old are you? I responded with Im 21 sir, but I haven’t supplied any alcohol to anyone but myself. Cop smirks but looks at my GF and asks her her age.

She looks around shyly, albeit drunkenly, and says Fifteen. It took me a moment to clock it but the cops looking at me wide-eyed confirmed what I thought must have been a misheard statement. The moment the statement was confirmed was met by a What the fucking fuck!?! scream of disbelief and projectile vomit from the realization I had been banging a 15-year-old for a month. She did not look like she was that young.

I immediately went on a rant about how I met her mom and how the fuck that was even possible. Apparently my reaction was so genuine that the cops believed it. They even had the girl call her mom and her mother confirmed that they had lied to me. All I received that night was being pulled aside by cops and a lecture about checking girls IDs.

15. The smelllike wet garbage in the hot sunhit me.

Back when I was in law school, there was a girl, M. M was a wholesome gal from Wisconsin: blonde hair, blue eyes, a slight gap in her front teeth. A real girl-next-door type (in the traditional, non-porno sense). She grew up on a dairy farm.

M was what we called law school hotlate 20s (and just starting to show it), slightly pudgy, finally trying harder to dress professionally than to dress sexy, generally attractive, but didn’t really stand out in a crowd. Her biggest assetliterallywas her awesome rack. To quote , they hung enormous, the way you’d think of God’s as big. Her daddy would have been lucky to have a milk cow endowed like her.

It was the end of our first semester, which for new 1Ls is a huge deal. (The stress during the initial year in law school is tremendous; if you’ve ever seen the movie Paper Chase, it’s 100% accurate.) The tradition at my law school was for everyone to saunter over to the bar a block away after their last exam and hang out. M and I had a friendly relationship up until that point, so when I saw her walk through the door, I waved her over and she joined our group of about ten or so.

At some pointprompted in part, I’m sure, by large quantities of boozewe of course started talking about sex, and because one of the guys with us was gay, the topic of anal sex came up. After a bit, M admitted that she had never tried anal. I was drunk and feeling saucy, so I said, ‘We should rectify that. Rectum-ify, she giggled back, and at that moment, I decided to put all of my drunken intellect towards coming in her back door before the night was out.

After a few hours our group was dwindling, but some of us were determined to continue celebrating for a while longer and M was looking like she was ready to head out. She needed to eat, she said, and was running out of cash, too. We still had about ¾ of a pizza left, and I was trying to convince her to stay, so I offered to buy her next drink if she’d stick around.

When I came back with her drinksomething with tequila, I believeshe turned to me and said, I shouldn’t be eating this, I’m lactose-intolerant. I hope you’re happy, because I’m doing this for you.

After that round, more people headed out, and M couldn’t be persuaded to stay. But I wasn’t ready to give up, so I offered to walk her home, since our apartments were next to each other, and only a few blocks away. When we got to her place, she invited me in. We went through the standard fooling around routine, ending up naked and horizontal in her bed.

Emboldened by earlier conversation, M’s apparent enthusiasm, and a large dose of alcohol, I eventually suggested that we try anal, and M agreed. After some shuffling, we ended up with her on top so that she could control the depth and speed, and for a few minutes, I was happily watching M’s magnificent mammaries jiggle around while she gingerly bounced on my rod.

After a few minutes, her expression switched from drunken sex stupor to pain and fear. Assuming I had hurt her somehow, I began to push her off of me, but she told me to wait. Sudden pressure and heat on my tool tipped me off to her digestive distress, and I could feel something trickling down my balls. I started to get up again, but she said, No, please. Stay inside. Just for a minute. I protested, but she was panicked, and begged me to help her to the bathroom before I pulled out.

We flailed around for a moment, and awkwardly switched to doggy style. We tried to shuffle to the bathroom, but drunkenness, the physical difficulty of the act, and the sheer ridiculousness of it all meant we didn’t make much progress. In a moment of inebriated genius, I hoisted her up by the hips and suggested she walk on her hands.

It turns out that wheelbarrowing a crying drunk girl across her apartment with your dick stuck in her ass isn’t particularly sexy, and a combination of internal pressure and my rapidly deflating member caused what is probably best referred to as an uncorking.

I watched in slow-mo horror as a fountain of diarrhea blasted out of her butthole, point-blank into my crotch. Spattering my torso. And my arms. And my face. And I dropped her. She hit the ground, hard, sobbing. The smelllike wet garbage in the hot sunhit me. I was painted from waist down with her special brand of brownie batter.

I was in shock. I just stood there, dumbfounded, staring at this poor girl, suffering the world’s worst case of mudbutt, crying on the floor of her shitty apartment, shit oozing out of her ass, shit dripping off of me.

But as horrible as the sight and the smell were, the worst was the sound. That sound will haunt me for the rest of my life. No language on Earth can approximate the cacophony of her crapping everywhere. It was a combination of the most over-the-top whoopee cushion, someone snapping gum through their teeth, and the glug of a water cooler. That sound blared above all, the way classical music plays during the hero’s against-all-odds rush into death in war movies. The sobbing was a distant drone, almost outside my notice, but the burbling of her bowels was deafening, in perfect sonorous clarity.

I must have stood there for maybe 10 seconds, but it felt like an hour. In a daze I pulled my pants on, then ran out the door. I mean ran. I sprinted. I left my shirt, my shoes, my socks, my boxers. All of it was abandoned in my mad dash to get home. People on the street saw me, but I didn’t care. I ran the 100 yards to my apartment door, past everyone, and I threw myself in the shower, and I cried.

16. She yelps like a pup and I spent the next 15 minutes cradling her as she whimpers, calling me an idiot.

Was having sex with my girlfriend at the time shes this cute little thing but really strong (she actually joined the Army later) anyway shes on top, I grab her and pull her to me and flip her onto her back and now I’m on top. She fucking loves it. She decides she wants to put her hands in my hair, small problem her one arm is in between my hand holding me up (This was spontaneous hiking in the woods and on top of a picnic blanket sex and not soft bed sex) and her body. She decides to quickly pull her hand out just as I was thrusting. She knocks out my support and I start to fall so I lift my other hand and throw it to center the balance. Her seeing my fall turns to her side so we dont whack skulls. Now this girl weighs 110 soaking wet, I’m 250lbs. My center balancing position threw my hand down at Mach 1 with 250lbs behind it directly onto her breast. She yelps like a pup and I spent the next 15 minutes cradling her as she whimpers, calling me an idiot.

17. I lasted like 4 pumps max.

tl;dr Couldn’t get it up and repeatedly embarrassed myself night after night for two weeks.

So I met this girl overseas. She was also American and was working in the same area I was. Short, great curves, cute face, overall way hot. Started talking to her on Facebook, and found out she was an awesome conversationalist and that we had a lot of personality traits in common. Unfortunately, things didn’t escalate quickly enough before I ended up going home for a few months.

While I was home, we kept talking of Facebook and really hit it off. Flirting became sex references became overt I want to have sex with you. This went on for like two months. We were Skyping and messaging all day long. We even discussed that we would be making out and banging as soon as I got back.

Finally got back and saw her again, and we immediately went back to my room and got down to it. 0-100mph in the space of about 10 mins, and we hadn’t even had a sip of alcohol.

I really liked this girl. A lot. Too much. So much that my nerves overruled my basic biological functions and I went soft as a bar rag as soon as she was above me about to put it in. Try as we might, there was no getting me stiff again. I’d never had trouble keeping it up (while sober) before and was highly surprised and disappointed with myself. I’d also never had this strong of an affection for someone before ever having sex with them.

Freshly inspired by some illuminating time with a therapist back home, I decided that honesty with her and with myself was the best policy here and just explained that I was nervous as shit and didn’t think I could be performing tonight. She hid her disappointment very well. We cuddled up and went to bed.

I woke up in the middle of the night, hard as a diamond, and decided to try again. Minimum amount of foreplay and I lasted like 4 pumps max. She actually thanked me for waking her up to try again!

I could get plenty hard enough when we tried from there on out, but as soon as the shuttle approached for reentry, all the heat shielding melted away, the structure collapsed, and the crew went down in burning flames. My nerves persisted with no sign of relenting with her over the next few days.

This saint blew me every day and I disappointed this woman who wanted my cock so bad every day for like two weeks. She stuck around enthusiastic and persistent (which blows my mind because she could have left and pulled any slab of hot meat she wanted) for two weeks. Expecting her to give up and leave made me even more nervous, but she never did.

Finally, in a night of just the right amount of tipsy, I pulled it off! Had drunk, short, sloppy sex, but I was mildly reassured that I at least was capable. Over the next few days, I gradually got over my nerves enough to at least keep hard enough to penetrate. When I was finally batting 100 instead of zero, we basically opened the floodgates and fucked at least daily for months. Sex got better and better and she stuck around.

She moved in with me last summer and I can’t imagine a cooler girlfriend.

18. We get 4, maybe 5 thrusts in before the girl’s friend barges into the room and starts screaming bloody murder.

Coincidentally my first go at sex…. Party at a good friends’ house, talk to a girl all night and end up in one of my friend’s bedroom, my friends were siblings, this is important because my friend had gotten in trouble earlier in the week with her mother resulting in her door knob being removed so she couldn’t lock the door. Things are getting hot and heavy, clothes are off, dick is slid in, and we get 4, maybe 5 thrusts in before the girl’s friend barges into the room and starts screaming bloody murder, for no reason beyond being a drunk high school girl encountering an awkward interaction, whole room rushes in as the girl sits, petrified, on top of my softening dick.

19. Girl blew me. Somehow she made it boring.

Girl blew me.

Somehow she made it boring.

Also dry like desert.

Painful, could not convince her to do something else.

Her begging me to cum had opposite effect it should have. Normally wind blows I cum, but not this day.

Finally take matters into my own hands (A, normally wouldn’t want to, B, she stopped me every time before she developed lockjaw an hour in) finish myself in her mouth.

Collapse from exhaustion and sadness.

She tells me she loves me.

This was our first sexual encounter of any kind.

Bizzaro world of future with her as my wife getting blow jobs I somehow don’t want every night flashes before my eyes.

I bolt.

She proclaims as I fade out of sight, that was the best I’ve ever given.

Her roommates were in living room, though I didn’t see them, I’m sure they shook their heads.

Sad.

20. The whole time I was thinking, Im gonna fucking die.

She was drunk, I was drunker, it was like trying to stab someone with a piece of soft rope, so I had some…enhancement pills, not a great combo being drunk, horny and all worked up so I basically ended up at near heart attack levels of strain on my heart, I mean I did it and she seemed happy enough, but the whole time I was thinking Im gonna fucking die, I’m gonna die fucking someone in doggy and pin her down with my body when I do.

Ironically I bet that made me last longer. Also when I woke up I was still erect.

21. And that, ladies and gents, is how I began the year of 2016 by contracting syphilis.

She was 5 foot nothing, perky breasts, and a shapely backside. Cute as a button.

She laid next to me on her single mattress in the dingy apartment room she was forced to rent in order to dance in the local strip joint of my home town. Both of us fairly hung over, though no less frisky for it.

As we lay there dozing in and out of sleep, and mumbling conversation her intentions for my company became clearer the more often her ass made its way to grinding against my groin.

Bedraggled state of affairs I was in, I tried to ignore her silent request for attention. Whether a result of anxiety at being in bed with a real live exotic dancer, the effects of my diet consisting solely of beer and cigarettes for 3 days solid, or a combination of both, junior was not up to the task.

However my companion was determined. Given her increased advances I refused to allow myself to miss the opportunity of bedding a stripper. Reaching a free hand into my boxers, I began to tug one out.

After a brief minute of awakening my member, I felt sufficiently hard enough to see through the task at hand. Rolling over into a spooning position I guided my cock to her awaiting opening, and did my damndest to enter her.

Unfortunately it became obvious that my wedding tackle wasn’t sufficiently warmed up, as I began pushing rope after acquainting myself with the first couple inches of her vulva.

Propping my would-be lover onto her knees, I assumed my position behind her and tried to go to work once more. I attended her vagina with one free hand while stimulating my rod with the other.

It only occurred to me after the first few strokes how long my willy had gone without attention. Before I could rethink my strategy-or convince junior to take any other form besides that of an over cooked pasta noodle-I felt an all too familiar sensation rushing through my vas.

I tried to clamp my trouser snake in a death grip as a last-ditch effort to stop the inevitable, but to no avail. Bat and balls pulsed in unison, erupting a fountain of jism far more enthusiastic than I would have expected given the setting. It was all over.

Kneeling there, unbelieving, I looked brokenly to the web of cum enveloping my hand and the considerable dollop on the sheets. My attempted consort still positioned patiently, eyes closed, anticipating more than the idle digit I had planted in her baby chute.

I did the best to compose myself, wiped the spunk off on a nearby scrap of fabric, and managed to splutter the words I need a cigarette.

And that, ladies and gents, is how I began the year of 2016 by contracting syphilis.

22. I found a long yellow dead piece of grass up my dickhole.

Was young and was having sex in the grass in the backyard, I felt a giant spider skittle across my chest and bucked the bitch off of me. Turned over and got up, later in the house I felt a weird pressure on my dick, went to the bathroom and found a long yellow dead piece of grass up my dickhole. Hurt the whole way out.

If youre going to have sex outside kids, put down a blanket.

23. The story of Vampire Girl.

Oh boy. Let me tell you the story of Vampire Girl.

Many years ago, I had just gotten out of my first relationship. That first relationship included all the other firsts – kiss, grope, sex, etc. Upon its ending, I was a total wreck. A pitiful mass of ridiculously maudlin sentiments. My friends kept telling me I needed to rebound. Get under someone to get over someone. You know the drill.

So a perfectly lovely girl invites me out, then we head to her place. I was not into it. I was and remain pretty much unable to differentiate the act of sex from romantic feelings, and I was still in love with my ex. So things weren’t really working down there.

This lovely girl takes it in stride, and decides that some kink will help turn the cooked noodle back into hard, raw spaghetti. Cue something that I, the veteran of one fairly vanilla sexual partner, was not prepared to hear.

Her: Do you want me to get out my whip?

Me: Uh

Her: We can taste each other’s blood.

Me: can we just go to sleep, please?

She kept stroking my face all night.

Listen, S, I don’t know if you’re reading this, but current me would have been willing to work a bit with the whip. Still no blood play. Sorry for being awkward as all hell about it back then.

Read this: 23 Women Reveal The Absolute WORST Sexual Experience Of Their Lives

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/23-men-reveal-the-absolute-worst-sexual-experience-of-their-lives/ from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/178460796597

[samanthasroberts]

23 Men Reveal The Absolute WORST Sexual Experience Of Their Lives

Found on AskReddit.

1. Her false eye popped out and I felt it on my balls.

Met girl at rave. Went to cemetery. Getting beej, she deep throated, her false eye I was unaware of came out.

Felt it on my balls.

Yes.

2. There was a swamp-green streak in her panties that smelled like a fish’s asshole.

Was back in high school. Things were getting hot and heavy until I tried taking her pants off. There was a swamp-green streak in her panties that smelled like a fish’s asshole. We didn’t even get to the sex part and I still consider it the worst sex I’ve ever had. It still haunts me to this day.

3. My balls got tickled by her fart.

With my now ex-wife. Standard sexy-time up to a point (kissing, boob play, a little oral), then I go to put it in. She farts. I felt it tickle my balls.

It tickled my balls, man. You can’t keep going after that. I’m a nurse and not much grosses me out but…My balls got tickled by her fart.

4. I lay there….unspent and sad.

Does masturbation count? Im going to tell it anyways.

I was having a dry period of about a month. I woke up after a really vivid wet dream and tried to rub it out.

I proceeded to slip in and out of consciousness for a good ten minutes, rubbing it until it is hard, falling half asleep for a minute, waking up again, rubbing it again. After those ten minutes, I just gave up. I lay there….unspent and sad.

5. I was gagging the entire time.

Was quite drunk and in a miserable period in my life where I’d fuck just about anything. Hooked up with a neighbor’s friend. She had dreads. I was gagging the entire time. Barely managed to finish. Showered for what felt like an eternity after.

6. She shit right in my hand.

I pulled out to give myself a break, we were in the doggy position. I started fingering her and she started to orgasm. She shit right in my hand.

7. I threw up on her snatch.

I went down on a girl and it smelled exactly like an Arby’s cheddar melt. I threw up on her snatch, and that wasn’t a deal breaker for her. It just made her want it more. She knew I liked it a little rough, from previous conversations, and so she straight up launched herself, puke beef cootchie and all, right onto my face and starts grinding. I was so caught off be-fucking-wildered that I froze, internally screaming this is a bad dream. This has got to be a bad fucking dream. Meanwhile in grind town, the aroma of Arby’s and half-digested oatmeal smeared my face as I finally screamed in horror and ran out.

You try getting that out of your beard.

8. She insisted on watching while blowing me.

Ended up losing my virginity to my first girlfriend while watching I asked her if we could maybe turn it off, at which point she removed my penis from her mouth and said, But it’s my favorite movie?

9. It was like my penis rolled a sticky tear.

I had a pretty sad jerk off the other night.

I guess my heart wasn’t into it or something but the run up to the orgasm started fine but then it just became a chore. I kept thinking about other stuff. My arm was getting tired. I farted mid-way through and the smell was a distraction.

I start to cum and it immediately got soft and just like seeped out. No energy behind it at all. No happiness or excitement. It was like my penis rolled a sticky tear.

Then my dick was like a sad old drunk slumping into a puddle of his own sick. I just sat there all heavy with shame for a few seconds as this gif looping on my monitor that, with the haze of arousal fizzled, was just awkward and weird. All titties being mashed and slapped around like they owed someone money.

Then I got a sandwich and played Minecraft.

10. I found out in the most painful way that I was in fact too big for her once her teeth shredded my dick and filled her mouth with blood.

Was dating a girl a few years back and after a month of intense make out sessions and heavy petting we decided it was time to take things to the next level. It started off well enough when she pulled out my junk and exclaimed I was the biggest she’d seen, and she was proud of her ability to deep throat and was insistent she could take me on. So without any warm up at all she tries to shove my entire dry dick down her throat and I found out in the most painful way that I was in fact too big for her once her teeth shredded my dick and filled her mouth with blood. We didn’t get to the sex part due to my crying

11. I accidentally told a girl I loved her and proceeded to have awkward coitus.

I was once having sex with a girl I’d been dating for a few weeks. I thought she said I love you so I was like Oh I love you too but she actually just said something completely different. She stopped dead and questioned what I’d said, but I just said never mind and carried on. TL;DR I accidentally told a girl I loved her and proceeded to have awkward coitus.

12. She kindly informs me I wasn’t in and was rubbing between her ass cheeks and sheets the whole time.

First time I ever did it. I was thrusting hard and doing well, so I thought. Then she kindly informs me I wasn’t in and was rubbing between her ass cheeks and sheets the whole time. I almost came from that.

13. I banged a hoarder in the closet of her smelly apartment. Afterwards she fished an old condom out of her pussy.

So, Im at a bar and I start working on a girl. Shes pretty hot. We dance, we drink, we talk. She makes it pretty clear she wants to go back to my place. At one point, she was even joking how its been forever since she’s been laid.

Im only in town visiting a friend and crashing on his couch so I insist on going to her place. Initially she resists the idea but I elaborate on the couch thing, plus he lives super far away, he doesnt have a car so I dont know how she would get home, etc., etc. Eventually she caves.

She lives walking distance away in a pretty nice apartment building. We go up the elevator and when we get to her front door she warns me that she shares a 1 bedroom apartment with a roommate and that, Its a little bit messy.

She opens the door; we go in and Im slapped across the face with the stench of weeks-old garbage and a pile of dishes festering in the sink. I have no idea how someone could live with that smell emanating from their kitchen but perhaps even worse is the whole place looks like an episode of hoarders. Junk is everywhere. It covers every conceivable surface, and is several feet thick in some places with piles of laundry and random items littered across the floor.

At this point, a better man would have called it. Thanked her for the lovely evening and taken a very lonely but far more sanitary cab ride back home. But its been a while for me and shes probably the hottest chick Ive ever landed. So instead her and I waded through the piles of garbage to make our way to her bedroom.

She leads me to a windowless room that I can only describe as a closet. Its barely large enough for a single mattress, which is placed directly on the floor. We are surrounded on all sides by piles of junk and clothes but Im relieved to be away from the chaos and stink that is her kitchen.

We go in and I close the door behind us and we are plunged into blackness. There are no lights in the room. She fumbles around and says Just a second! while she rummages through her purse, takes out her cellphone, activates the flashlight app, and MacGyver’s the worlds saddest desk lamp by propping it up on a pile of dirty clothes.

We get down to business. At this point Im so thoroughly disgusted with myself that Im having trouble getting ready for action. Fortunately (or perhaps unfortunately), she sucks dick like a champ and we get things underway. I put on a condom and were off to the races. At this point all I want to do is blow my load and make my escape from this smelly dungeon.

Then she stops me: Wait a second I think the condom broke. My heart immediately seizes up and sinks to the pit of my stomach as I consider the possibility of being connected to this hot mess and her garbage dungeon for 18 years.

I withdraw and she sticks her finger into her pussy, fishes out a broken condom, and flings it at the wall. As shes rummaging through her trash heap looking for another condom I look down and I notice something. Im still wearing a condom And its totally intact.

tl;dr I banged a hoarder in the closet of her smelly apartment. Afterwards she fished an old condom out of her pussy.

14. I projectile-vomited from the realization I had been banging a 15-year-old for a month.

This one is sad and I’m disgusted with myself for a reason that will become clear. I was 21 and had been dating this girl who was 18. I met her mother and they were even talking about how they were planning her 19th birthday party and how she couldn’t believe how fast her little girl was growing up and her mom even said her daughter scored big time landing a handsome 21-year-old man yadda yadda. It was weird and felt like I was missing an inside joke. Fast forward a month and lots of pretty good sex.

We had left party at a beach house to fuck in my car. She gets sick and vomits at one point, super drunk, but thankfully she managed to vomit outside the car. We keep going at it, or trying to; I was drunk myself and drunk me and erections dont work so well, windows had fogged up and the car was rocking.

There’s a sharp knock at the window that I ignored, kept fucking. Then there’s another knock and its insistent. I get angry at this point and yell leave me alone, we are fucking! I thought it was a friend looking for us. Nope. I was met by a blinding light being shown and an obvious cop tone telling us to exit the vehicle.

Two cops were outside and asked if we were at the party because they had a noise complaint. Yup. I’m freaking out because she’s clearly wasted and she was only 18. I was 21 so I just knew I would be hit with a charge for supplying alcohol to an underage person. The dreaded question comes up. How old are you? I responded with Im 21 sir, but I haven’t supplied any alcohol to anyone but myself. Cop smirks but looks at my GF and asks her her age.

She looks around shyly, albeit drunkenly, and says Fifteen. It took me a moment to clock it but the cops looking at me wide-eyed confirmed what I thought must have been a misheard statement. The moment the statement was confirmed was met by a What the fucking fuck!?! scream of disbelief and projectile vomit from the realization I had been banging a 15-year-old for a month. She did not look like she was that young.

I immediately went on a rant about how I met her mom and how the fuck that was even possible. Apparently my reaction was so genuine that the cops believed it. They even had the girl call her mom and her mother confirmed that they had lied to me. All I received that night was being pulled aside by cops and a lecture about checking girls IDs.

15. The smelllike wet garbage in the hot sunhit me.

Back when I was in law school, there was a girl, M. M was a wholesome gal from Wisconsin: blonde hair, blue eyes, a slight gap in her front teeth. A real girl-next-door type (in the traditional, non-porno sense). She grew up on a dairy farm.

M was what we called law school hotlate 20s (and just starting to show it), slightly pudgy, finally trying harder to dress professionally than to dress sexy, generally attractive, but didn’t really stand out in a crowd. Her biggest assetliterallywas her awesome rack. To quote , they hung enormous, the way you’d think of God’s as big. Her daddy would have been lucky to have a milk cow endowed like her.

It was the end of our first semester, which for new 1Ls is a huge deal. (The stress during the initial year in law school is tremendous; if you’ve ever seen the movie Paper Chase, it’s 100% accurate.) The tradition at my law school was for everyone to saunter over to the bar a block away after their last exam and hang out. M and I had a friendly relationship up until that point, so when I saw her walk through the door, I waved her over and she joined our group of about ten or so.

At some pointprompted in part, I’m sure, by large quantities of boozewe of course started talking about sex, and because one of the guys with us was gay, the topic of anal sex came up. After a bit, M admitted that she had never tried anal. I was drunk and feeling saucy, so I said, ‘We should rectify that. Rectum-ify, she giggled back, and at that moment, I decided to put all of my drunken intellect towards coming in her back door before the night was out.

After a few hours our group was dwindling, but some of us were determined to continue celebrating for a while longer and M was looking like she was ready to head out. She needed to eat, she said, and was running out of cash, too. We still had about 3/4 of a pizza left, and I was trying to convince her to stay, so I offered to buy her next drink if she’d stick around.

When I came back with her drinksomething with tequila, I believeshe turned to me and said, I shouldn’t be eating this, I’m lactose-intolerant. I hope you’re happy, because I’m doing this for you.

After that round, more people headed out, and M couldn’t be persuaded to stay. But I wasn’t ready to give up, so I offered to walk her home, since our apartments were next to each other, and only a few blocks away. When we got to her place, she invited me in. We went through the standard fooling around routine, ending up naked and horizontal in her bed.

Emboldened by earlier conversation, M’s apparent enthusiasm, and a large dose of alcohol, I eventually suggested that we try anal, and M agreed. After some shuffling, we ended up with her on top so that she could control the depth and speed, and for a few minutes, I was happily watching M’s magnificent mammaries jiggle around while she gingerly bounced on my rod.

After a few minutes, her expression switched from drunken sex stupor to pain and fear. Assuming I had hurt her somehow, I began to push her off of me, but she told me to wait. Sudden pressure and heat on my tool tipped me off to her digestive distress, and I could feel something trickling down my balls. I started to get up again, but she said, No, please. Stay inside. Just for a minute. I protested, but she was panicked, and begged me to help her to the bathroom before I pulled out.

We flailed around for a moment, and awkwardly switched to doggy style. We tried to shuffle to the bathroom, but drunkenness, the physical difficulty of the act, and the sheer ridiculousness of it all meant we didn’t make much progress. In a moment of inebriated genius, I hoisted her up by the hips and suggested she walk on her hands.

It turns out that wheelbarrowing a crying drunk girl across her apartment with your dick stuck in her ass isn’t particularly sexy, and a combination of internal pressure and my rapidly deflating member caused what is probably best referred to as an uncorking.

I watched in slow-mo horror as a fountain of diarrhea blasted out of her butthole, point-blank into my crotch. Spattering my torso. And my arms. And my face. And I dropped her. She hit the ground, hard, sobbing. The smelllike wet garbage in the hot sunhit me. I was painted from waist down with her special brand of brownie batter.

I was in shock. I just stood there, dumbfounded, staring at this poor girl, suffering the world’s worst case of mudbutt, crying on the floor of her shitty apartment, shit oozing out of her ass, shit dripping off of me.

But as horrible as the sight and the smell were, the worst was the sound. That sound will haunt me for the rest of my life. No language on Earth can approximate the cacophony of her crapping everywhere. It was a combination of the most over-the-top whoopee cushion, someone snapping gum through their teeth, and the glug of a water cooler. That sound blared above all, the way classical music plays during the hero’s against-all-odds rush into death in war movies. The sobbing was a distant drone, almost outside my notice, but the burbling of her bowels was deafening, in perfect sonorous clarity.

I must have stood there for maybe 10 seconds, but it felt like an hour. In a daze I pulled my pants on, then ran out the door. I mean ran. I sprinted. I left my shirt, my shoes, my socks, my boxers. All of it was abandoned in my mad dash to get home. People on the street saw me, but I didn’t care. I ran the 100 yards to my apartment door, past everyone, and I threw myself in the shower, and I cried.

16. She yelps like a pup and I spent the next 15 minutes cradling her as she whimpers, calling me an idiot.

Was having sex with my girlfriend at the time shes this cute little thing but really strong (she actually joined the Army later) anyway shes on top, I grab her and pull her to me and flip her onto her back and now I’m on top. She fucking loves it. She decides she wants to put her hands in my hair, small problem her one arm is in between my hand holding me up (This was spontaneous hiking in the woods and on top of a picnic blanket sex and not soft bed sex) and her body. She decides to quickly pull her hand out just as I was thrusting. She knocks out my support and I start to fall so I lift my other hand and throw it to center the balance. Her seeing my fall turns to her side so we dont whack skulls. Now this girl weighs 110 soaking wet, I’m 250lbs. My center balancing position threw my hand down at Mach 1 with 250lbs behind it directly onto her breast. She yelps like a pup and I spent the next 15 minutes cradling her as she whimpers, calling me an idiot.

17. I lasted like 4 pumps max.

tl;dr Couldn’t get it up and repeatedly embarrassed myself night after night for two weeks.

So I met this girl overseas. She was also American and was working in the same area I was. Short, great curves, cute face, overall way hot. Started talking to her on Facebook, and found out she was an awesome conversationalist and that we had a lot of personality traits in common. Unfortunately, things didn’t escalate quickly enough before I ended up going home for a few months.

While I was home, we kept talking of Facebook and really hit it off. Flirting became sex references became overt I want to have sex with you. This went on for like two months. We were Skyping and messaging all day long. We even discussed that we would be making out and banging as soon as I got back.

Finally got back and saw her again, and we immediately went back to my room and got down to it. 0-100mph in the space of about 10 mins, and we hadn’t even had a sip of alcohol.

I really liked this girl. A lot. Too much. So much that my nerves overruled my basic biological functions and I went soft as a bar rag as soon as she was above me about to put it in. Try as we might, there was no getting me stiff again. I’d never had trouble keeping it up (while sober) before and was highly surprised and disappointed with myself. I’d also never had this strong of an affection for someone before ever having sex with them.

Freshly inspired by some illuminating time with a therapist back home, I decided that honesty with her and with myself was the best policy here and just explained that I was nervous as shit and didn’t think I could be performing tonight. She hid her disappointment very well. We cuddled up and went to bed.

I woke up in the middle of the night, hard as a diamond, and decided to try again. Minimum amount of foreplay and I lasted like 4 pumps max. She actually thanked me for waking her up to try again!

I could get plenty hard enough when we tried from there on out, but as soon as the shuttle approached for reentry, all the heat shielding melted away, the structure collapsed, and the crew went down in burning flames. My nerves persisted with no sign of relenting with her over the next few days.

This saint blew me every day and I disappointed this woman who wanted my cock so bad every day for like two weeks. She stuck around enthusiastic and persistent (which blows my mind because she could have left and pulled any slab of hot meat she wanted) for two weeks. Expecting her to give up and leave made me even more nervous, but she never did.

Finally, in a night of just the right amount of tipsy, I pulled it off! Had drunk, short, sloppy sex, but I was mildly reassured that I at least was capable. Over the next few days, I gradually got over my nerves enough to at least keep hard enough to penetrate. When I was finally batting 100 instead of zero, we basically opened the floodgates and fucked at least daily for months. Sex got better and better and she stuck around.

She moved in with me last summer and I can’t imagine a cooler girlfriend.

18. We get 4, maybe 5 thrusts in before the girl’s friend barges into the room and starts screaming bloody murder.

Coincidentally my first go at sex…. Party at a good friends’ house, talk to a girl all night and end up in one of my friend’s bedroom, my friends were siblings, this is important because my friend had gotten in trouble earlier in the week with her mother resulting in her door knob being removed so she couldn’t lock the door. Things are getting hot and heavy, clothes are off, dick is slid in, and we get 4, maybe 5 thrusts in before the girl’s friend barges into the room and starts screaming bloody murder, for no reason beyond being a drunk high school girl encountering an awkward interaction, whole room rushes in as the girl sits, petrified, on top of my softening dick.

19. Girl blew me. Somehow she made it boring.

Girl blew me.

Somehow she made it boring.

Also dry like desert.

Painful, could not convince her to do something else.

Her begging me to cum had opposite effect it should have. Normally wind blows I cum, but not this day.

Finally take matters into my own hands (A, normally wouldn’t want to, B, she stopped me every time before she developed lockjaw an hour in) finish myself in her mouth.

Collapse from exhaustion and sadness.

She tells me she loves me.

This was our first sexual encounter of any kind.

Bizzaro world of future with her as my wife getting blow jobs I somehow don’t want every night flashes before my eyes.

I bolt.

She proclaims as I fade out of sight, that was the best I’ve ever given.

Her roommates were in living room, though I didn’t see them, I’m sure they shook their heads.

Sad.

20. The whole time I was thinking, Im gonna fucking die.

She was drunk, I was drunker, it was like trying to stab someone with a piece of soft rope, so I had some…enhancement pills, not a great combo being drunk, horny and all worked up so I basically ended up at near heart attack levels of strain on my heart, I mean I did it and she seemed happy enough, but the whole time I was thinking Im gonna fucking die, I’m gonna die fucking someone in doggy and pin her down with my body when I do.

Ironically I bet that made me last longer. Also when I woke up I was still erect.

21. And that, ladies and gents, is how I began the year of 2016 by contracting syphilis.

She was 5 foot nothing, perky breasts, and a shapely backside. Cute as a button.

She laid next to me on her single mattress in the dingy apartment room she was forced to rent in order to dance in the local strip joint of my home town. Both of us fairly hung over, though no less frisky for it.

As we lay there dozing in and out of sleep, and mumbling conversation her intentions for my company became clearer the more often her ass made its way to grinding against my groin.

Bedraggled state of affairs I was in, I tried to ignore her silent request for attention. Whether a result of anxiety at being in bed with a real live exotic dancer, the effects of my diet consisting solely of beer and cigarettes for 3 days solid, or a combination of both, junior was not up to the task.

However my companion was determined. Given her increased advances I refused to allow myself to miss the opportunity of bedding a stripper. Reaching a free hand into my boxers, I began to tug one out.

After a brief minute of awakening my member, I felt sufficiently hard enough to see through the task at hand. Rolling over into a spooning position I guided my cock to her awaiting opening, and did my damndest to enter her.

Unfortunately it became obvious that my wedding tackle wasn’t sufficiently warmed up, as I began pushing rope after acquainting myself with the first couple inches of her vulva.

Propping my would-be lover onto her knees, I assumed my position behind her and tried to go to work once more. I attended her vagina with one free hand while stimulating my rod with the other.

It only occurred to me after the first few strokes how long my willy had gone without attention. Before I could rethink my strategy-or convince junior to take any other form besides that of an over cooked pasta noodle-I felt an all too familiar sensation rushing through my vas.

I tried to clamp my trouser snake in a death grip as a last-ditch effort to stop the inevitable, but to no avail. Bat and balls pulsed in unison, erupting a fountain of jism far more enthusiastic than I would have expected given the setting. It was all over.

Kneeling there, unbelieving, I looked brokenly to the web of cum enveloping my hand and the considerable dollop on the sheets. My attempted consort still positioned patiently, eyes closed, anticipating more than the idle digit I had planted in her baby chute.

I did the best to compose myself, wiped the spunk off on a nearby scrap of fabric, and managed to splutter the words I need a cigarette.

And that, ladies and gents, is how I began the year of 2016 by contracting syphilis.

22. I found a long yellow dead piece of grass up my dickhole.

Was young and was having sex in the grass in the backyard, I felt a giant spider skittle across my chest and bucked the bitch off of me. Turned over and got up, later in the house I felt a weird pressure on my dick, went to the bathroom and found a long yellow dead piece of grass up my dickhole. Hurt the whole way out.

If youre going to have sex outside kids, put down a blanket.

23. The story of Vampire Girl.

Oh boy. Let me tell you the story of Vampire Girl.

Many years ago, I had just gotten out of my first relationship. That first relationship included all the other firsts – kiss, grope, sex, etc. Upon its ending, I was a total wreck. A pitiful mass of ridiculously maudlin sentiments. My friends kept telling me I needed to rebound. Get under someone to get over someone. You know the drill.

So a perfectly lovely girl invites me out, then we head to her place. I was not into it. I was and remain pretty much unable to differentiate the act of sex from romantic feelings, and I was still in love with my ex. So things weren’t really working down there.

This lovely girl takes it in stride, and decides that some kink will help turn the cooked noodle back into hard, raw spaghetti. Cue something that I, the veteran of one fairly vanilla sexual partner, was not prepared to hear.

Her: Do you want me to get out my whip?

Me: Uh

Her: We can taste each other’s blood.

Me: can we just go to sleep, please?

She kept stroking my face all night.

Listen, S, I don’t know if you’re reading this, but current me would have been willing to work a bit with the whip. Still no blood play. Sorry for being awkward as all hell about it back then.

Read this: 23 Women Reveal The Absolute WORST Sexual Experience Of Their Lives

Source: http://allofbeer.com/23-men-reveal-the-absolute-worst-sexual-experience-of-their-lives/

from All of Beer https://allofbeer.wordpress.com/2018/09/25/23-men-reveal-the-absolute-worst-sexual-experience-of-their-lives/