#i didnt pay for gas becuase the one other person with moeny was kind enough to usually send me some gas moeny but still

[tinyorangepotato]

Why do i have to be the optimistic one. God i can think of almost every way that everything can go wrong and be cynical and assholish about everything in my mind but everyone else is that way on the outside too and so i gotta stay opimistic. Well, i dont got to but if i dont no one else will and then we are all just miserable. Like my coworkers are horrible people who i would never talk to outside of work itself and talking about the people coming in over the border and how they're all just greedy and selfish or whatever and its like have you ever considered that they aren't like that and they are trying to make a better life and you guys are assholes and cynical. (man i really jsut like repeating adjectives huh). And like i gotta be patient too because theres no reason not to be. Being impatient expecially in conversations is horrible beucase then you get irritated then the person youre talking to is irritated and it makes everything jsut worst so why do it. like my grandma asked me 3 times if i was sleeping (i wasnt i jsut had my head under the covers) and i repsonded saying no every time and so my cousin that was standing next to her stepped and and went "she said no already" like he was annoyed. and like whats the point of that. you weren't apart of that conversation and now youre annoyed and becuase you had an attitude with that one single sentence you jsut said, she is too. Like bro theres no reason for it just wait a little bit or repsond better and then no one gets pissed. like it easy. And people that are already irritated and impatient at something else just takes it out on other things for no reason and its like jsut dont???? You can be annoyed at something and at the same time patient with something else. Theres no reason to make other peoples lives (and yours) worse becuase youre not super happy. You can still be kind even if youre going though something. You dont have to alwasy see the worst in everything beucase something bad is going on. you can see the good, you jsut gotta stop focusing on the bad and its not as difficult as it seems really. Like constantly ill think that ugh i dont want to go somewhere becuase itll be hot, adn there will be too many people, and everything expensive, and i have to drive for a while, and i gotta get gas which aslo costs moeny, adn i wont even have /that/ good of a time; but i dont beucase if you focus on that then you will have an even worse time. Focus on oh i get to hang out with my friends and look at cool homemade items and go do something outside of the normal wake up, work, and sleep routine and all that. Theres the "dont get me started" game that ive seen a couple times on tumblr and dude i would be so good at that beucase i can find almost anything that would make something unenjoyable and all that but everyone else can point things out like that too so i gotta take a step back and see the good side and rationalize it too instead.

This went absolutly no where but god i hate that I can't be annoyed or cynical or disrespectful ebcuase everyone else is and so whats the point. I should try to balance it out beucase once you dont see the good, theres no reason to so absooutely anything.