#i didn't really know
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my monster high icons are getting attention whilst i've been afk for years..... so i do appreciate people giving them attention, i don't really mind or care if you guys give credit. its not like i'm gonna hunt you down!! but i got somethings to say about them.
the reason why i made those icons is only because i rewatched the movies and show (the old show) for a nostalgia dive. so by doing this, i started doing nostalgic monster high icons and posted them through queued posts whilst i am afk.
whilst that was happening, i abandoned this blog. i recently came back to it to be surprised by a lot of people liking and reblogging saying they liked them or saved them. but i saw someone comment that a character is gay without my awareness over it. i'm not against lgbt+ characters, i love seeing them! but i'm rather confused with that being brought up.
i saw that character get paired w/ Frankie in the series (temporarily because she has so many characters paired with her). so i just made the icons of them together for cute reasons and moved on. i saw that they were a popular pairing at the time which is mostly why i made her and him be together in a icon. but i didn't know that he was gay(?).
please don't take this out of context, i'm not really writing this in a condescending way. i'm just concerned if i hurt anyone?
#im so confused#this is on my couple icons post#i didn't really know#sorry#post#keep in mind i dont really pay attention to the monster high fanbase#i just made those icons out of nostalgia#it wasn't my intention to harm anyone#i say 'character' because i literally forgot his name and im writing this at 1:30 am#dsgkogdjso
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I think so many people are so deeply alienated from themselves that they have no clue how to exercise their free will and autonomy. For some, this alienation runs so deep that they are afraid of their own autonomy and humanity. It is completely understandable why one would have those feelings, but it can be worrisome.
I want to help others who feel this way, so here are small things I have done to exercise my free will:
Add "guilty pleasure" songs to playlists and actually listen to them (I have a ton of late 1990s-early 2000s music I listen to now proudly that I never listened to in the past out of shame)
Getting the décor item, bath set, bed spread, ect. in the patterns you like, even if it's "childish" (I got a dinosaur-themed wastebasket from the kids' décor section and I adore it)
Taking a new route to get to a place you go to often
Eat dessert first
Celebrate well, and often
Collect things that are "odd" or don't seem like an "acceptable" thing to collect (somebody on my "for you" page collects dandelion crayola crayons and it was so cool!!!!!!)
Incorporate one new piece in an outfit you wear frequently (e.g., a new chain, a necklace, ribbons, bracelets, ect.). Challenge yourself to add onto the outfits if you feel up for it.
Sing along to songs without worrying that you sound "good" or your intonation is completely accurate
Read a book from a genre you weren't allowed to read as a kid (comics, thrillers, mysteries, anything!)
Walk without having a specific destination or goal
Pick up a new craft without expecting yourself to master it or to ever be "good" enough. Get your hands messy.
I don't want to shame anybody for not feeling as though they have free will or that they are exempt from exercising it. However, I wanted to give ideas so that you might read this list and find your own ways to express your intrinsic autonomy and will. You deserve to be a person, to feel alive, not just living. That is what our lives are for.
#mental health#mental health support#positivity#if anybody has ideas of their own definitely include them!#i just think being stuck with this feeling that you don't have autonomy and that you ultimately aren't an equal person or a person at all..#...in comparison to other people can be a really troubling and dangerous place to be in...#...and that isn't the person's fault for feeling that way. they didn't pluck those thoughts out of thin air...#...like i have felt that exact way all my LIFE because i have been abused for. probably 2/3s of my life...#...only within these past few years have i even FELT alive. frankly it's going to take a while to repair what i have been left with...#...so i know the feeling and i want to help others feel even a LITTLE bit alive. you deserve it...#...you deserve to take in a deep breath before slowly realizing 'oh my gd this is what it feels like to be alive' and SMILE about it#i want that for you even if it is brief. even if it is small. even if it is a whisper. i want you to feel alive#unironically getting rid of the idea of 'guilty pleasures' has made my life SO much better
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The greatest injustice ever faced is that I almost certainly started the still thriving "clown husbandry" tag on here, but any discussion about it (from a know your meme page to a youtube video with 500k views) says it's a joke of "unknown origin" or credited to this post, likely bouncing off of mine (which was actively circulating at the time with like 30k notes):
This is a tragedy for many reasons, most of all because it wasn't just an offhand joke but actually a direct response to some of the funniest online hate I ever got:
They're erasing the truest history of tumblr: its desperate need to seethe and argue over every obvious joke with more than 10 notes.
anyways here is the canonical pet clown. according to me
#but tumblr... i am pagliacci#clown husbandry#look strange aeons on youtube. i know you browse this tag.#I don't respect your 2011 tumblr core take on steven moffat#but I will forgive it when you right this wrong#EDIT: a few people think i'm saying i originated the concept of referring to a clown like an animal#i didn't. i mean i made this really specific joke about exotic animal husbandry and a lot of mutuals bounced off of it with similar jokes#and that's what people started tagging 'clown husbandry'#to this day when you look for the origins a lot of mutual's names (who also kept chickens/pigeons/reptiles/etc) pop up because of this
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DID YOU ALL KNOW THAT YOU CAN DO WHATEVER UOU WANT WHEN YOURW MAKING ART ISNT THAT WILD
#alex talks#this was a piece i didn't really know what to do with so i put the holes in at first and then someone im in class with suggested i bite it#(i think she was joking) and after i took out a chunk she said she meant just put an indent so i tried that too and that's why it's mismash
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This is petty fandom salt, BUT... I've been chewing on this phenomenon that I've been calling "Fandom's Darling". It is related to things like "Author's Darling" and "Mary Sue / Gary Stu" and "Protagonist Halo" and all that jazz, where one character gains a peculiar narrative weight in a story.
"Author's Darling" is when a writer has a favorite character, and the world and all other characters sort of get... warped to put the Darling in the spotlight. It's most noticeable in TV shows with multiple writers, when a character you personally like suddenly has their previous characterization destroyed to make another character look good somehow. Every other character might become weirdly incompetent. The Darling's feelings are treated as The Most Important Feelings in any given situation. The logic of the fictional world seems broken past suspension of disbelief in order to validate this one character's beliefs or skillset or some other fantasy. And so on.
"Fandom's Darling" is what I've been calling the pattern where a fandom essentially crowns a New Protagonist for their fanfiction stories (it's often a side character rather than the original protagonist, but it can also happen to protagonists). This character becomes the self-insert for all sorts of indulgent fantasies, gaining special powers or backstories, and/or becoming the focus of extreme whump, and/or hooking up with all the various hotties, starring in all sorts of tropey AUs, and so on. They're not always an obvious Mary Sue version of themselves, but the character's original personality and interpersonal relationships tend to get warped or dropped completely, and other characters tend to become a little flat around them. I call it "Fandom's Darling" because it's not just one self-indulgent fantasy fic (you do you! Have fun!) with characterization choices that I don't vibe with (I have neither the time nor the desire nor the authority to police anything, I am just venting), but rather a prolific mini-fandom of sorts revolving around this empty doll / fanon version of the chosen vessel character, so it becomes a little unavoidable.
I am salty about this (mildly frustrated) (imagine a soft sigh of disappointment before I just go do something else) because you are FUCKED if you actually liked the canonical version of this character and their interpersonal relationships. It's almost worse than liking an obscure character that no one cares about. There's about a thousand fics starring your fave, but maybe only about a dozen of them are actually rooted in any kind of recognisable canon.
#I didn't watch Teen Wolf but I know this happened to that Stiles character#I'm not active in any DC fandom but it looks like this happened to Tim Drake and to a lesser extent Dick and Jason#In prequels-era Star Wars it seems to be Obi-Wan; he's the spark/focus of this post here; bring back his flaws I like that he kind of sucks#sometimes a Fandom's Darling comes out of an Author's Darling! usually Fandom's are vessels to fuck the “hottest guy” available though#I will probably turn reblogs off if this spreads too far because I really don't care if people write Mary Sue fanfic; can't cast that stone#squinting at every “intersex” tag like Inigo Montoya: “I don't think that means what you think it means.”#honestly the fantasy intersex thing is a separate & more serious post; but the fandom usage is a red/yellow flag for me when searching#tossawary fandom#fandom's darling
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CHICAGOAN HATSUNE MIKU. Specifically the winter version <3. (alt text provided! :3)
#chicago hatsune miku#hatsune miku#miku as your culture#miku trend#chicago miku#chicago#i didn't know what to do for miku at first bc i REALLY wanted to do this miku trend#especially since chicago doesn't really have like a Style in terms of outfits#its more a Vibe#and the vibe is tired need comfy#dude like a solid 30% of my day is just waiting on the CTA WHEEZE#love it tho#cta peak#homegrown art
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♪ Marching ever forward, 'Neath the wooded shrine, I stray not from the path, I hold Death's hand in mine... ♪
#*gifs#1k#agatha all along#agathaallalongedit#rio vidal#riovidaledit#aubrey plaza#marveledit#mcuedit#tvedit#useraurore#jemmablossom#marvelgifs#marveldaily#marveladdicts#dailymarvelqueens#dailymarvelgifs#userbbelcher#chewieblog#cinemapix#dailyflicks#agatha all along spoilers#ngl i didn't realise this wasn't something we didn't already know asdfgkl but it really is soooo cool rio ur the coolest ily
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doylist explanation for why Gidel is only in Fellow's non-idle lesson animations: probably something about space constraints and making sure two sprites in one seat aren't covering anyone else when they're not in focus
watsonian explanation for why Gidel is only in Fellow's non-idle lesson animations: he snuck in and is hiding from the teachers, don't give him away 🤫
(I've reached my limit of unsuccessful attempts at pulling them before I need to save keys for Halloween, so I've been living vicariously through youtube videos...but the fact that Gidel just pops up from under the desk to wave his arms around happily is really testing my resolve. D: I'm gonna die when they finally get to do alchemy...)
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#stage in playful land#stage in playfulland#i hope you didn't think i was done with these dorks#they're here to study and also steal everything (including our hearts)#i forget if rollo has a similar line about what he's doing at nrc but i imagine he made sure it was all meticulously above-board#carefully planned out and all his papers in precise order#meanwhile fellow kicks down the door and is like 'what up birdman i'm here to learn some HISTORY'#'also this is my emotional support child. ...wait what do you mean you have precedent for this'#(he does have another home screen line that's like)#('i thought ortho was weird when i met him')#('but now i'm realizing that this school is actually just incredibly buckwild all the time')#sigh. i know fellow and gidel's adventures at nrc are non-canon but i really just want this random adult man inexplicably just there.#the more twst becomes cromartie high the happier i am
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you're in the habit of denying yourself things.
if someone asked you directly, you would say that you love a little treat. you like iced coffee and getting the cookie. you drink juice out of a fancy cup sometimes, and often do use your candles until they gutter out helplessly.
but you hesitate about buying the 20 dollar hand mixer because, like. you could just use your arms. you weren't raised rich. you don't get to just spend the 20 dollars (remember when that could cover lunch?), at least - you don't spend that without agonizing over it first, trying to figure out the cost-benefits like you are defending yourself in front of a jury. yes, this rice cooker could seriously help you. but you do know how to make stovetop rice and it really isn't that hard. how many pies or brownies would you actually make, in order to make that hand mixer worthwhile?
what's wild is that if the money was for a friend, it would already be spent. you'd fork over 40 without blinking an eye, just to make them happy. the difference is that it's for you, so you need to justify it.
and it sneaks in. you ration yourself without meaning to - you don't finish the pint of ice cream, even though you want to. the next time you go to the store, you say ah, i really shouldn't, and then you walk away. you save little bits of your precious things - just in case. sometimes you even go so far as putting that one thing in your shopping cart. and then just leaving it there, because maybe-one-day, but not right now, there's other stuff going on.
you do self-care, of course. but you don't do it more than like, 3 days in a row. after that it just feels a little bit over-the-edge. like. you can't live in decadence, the economy is so bad right now, kid.
so you don't buy the rice cooker. you can-and-will spend the time over the stove. you can withstand the little sorrows. denial and discipline are practically synonyms. and you're not spoiled.
it's just - it's not always a rice cooker. sometimes it is a person or a job or a hug. sometimes it is asking for help. sometimes it is the summer and your college degree. sometimes it is looking down at scabbed knees and feeling a strange kind of falling, like you can't even recognize the girl you used to be. sometimes it is your handprint looking unsteady.
sometimes it is tuesday, and you didn't get fired, and you want to celebrate. but what is it you like, even? you search around your little heart and come up empty. you're so used to denying that all your desires draw a blank.
oh fuck. see, this is the perfect opportunity. if you had a mixer, you'd make a cake.
#warm up#this isn't good#writeblr#this is complicated by the fact i can't stand up too long or i fuckken pass out and <3 hit my damn head <3#but i did take a deep breath and buy myself the stupid rice cooker#and!!! a very cheap sushi kit!!! i have been wanting to try making sushi for literally YEARS#the kit was only like 15 dollars!!!! and i haven't purchased it bc?!!??!?!?!?!!?#..... i didn't get the mixer tho that felt. like a lot. like too much.#on my list is a kitchenaid. one day when i get a check and i have paid off my student debt#and medical debt#i will put that first little bit of cash#into a kitchenaid 5qt stand mixer (with attachments)#i really do just go into their refurbished section and stare lustily at each option#but yeah i feel guilty about the rice cooker even tho i know for a fact this damn thing is gonna be a lifesaver#oh shit also fuck i forgot to mention . poached eggs
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So I'm leaving work and something darts in front of me, maybe 10ft away, too fast for me to see what it is. Peek around the tree blocking my path and I see this
Just like... a whole ass hawk. Dude's gotta be about 1.5ft tall. Massive fucking bird. And it's just staring me straight in my soul like this, even as I try to move ahead. It didn't budge. And there's only this path back to my car unless I want to walk on a busy highway. So I have the option of Death By Raptor or Death By Truck.
So I walk in the poison ivy filled patch off the sidewalk. Guy still isn't moving. Still staring me directly in the eyes. And I do this thing when animals are behaving strangely where I'll talk to them, so I'm just like, "Hey, man. I don't know you. You don't know me. This feels really threatening. I'm just trying to get to my car, dude. Can I get some space please? You're a big fucking bird. I see those claws. You could kill me right now, but I'd appreciate if you didn't, ok?"
It didn't move until I was about 2ft away. Again: I'm as far from it as I can be without walking into the street. It clearly wasn't going to budge. I walk past, thing flies up (silent, btw. Scary) and lands on a brick wall a little further ahead
Anyway. Weird guy. Nearly shit my pants when I noticed a bird big enough to carry off a fully grown cat was just... there, staring me in the face, unwilling to move away from me, a human, something it should see as a threat. I watched behind me the whole rest of the way to my car, just in case this bird decided to help me shed this mortal coil. 10/10 experience. Super cool guy.
#not vc sorry#bird#birds#aves#raptor#hawk#red shouldered hawk#i think. might be wrong on that id#accipitriformes#birds of prey#honestly a really cool guy so close up#I'm happy i wasn't attacked. i would not want to fight a guy that big.#talons on this bird were huge. big scary.#I've never heard of large predatory birds just landing in front of people like that so i don't know what gives#it didn't catch any food or anything. just landed near me then stared me down.#I don't know a lot about bird behavior so i tried to not look back at it but still.#it also didn't look injured. seemed like a healthy bird#if anyone has any idea why this thing would act the way it did I'd love to know
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it's november 16th and my best friend brought up my tweet from 4 years ago where i said that if anyone was overwhelmed by what was happening on the dsmp they could go watch phil because he made sure he would have a chill stream that day and oh this did not age well LMAOOO whenever i see this i just have to laugh
#i have to bring this back every year it's one of the funniest things i've ever done#i just really didn't know what was going to happen later that evening#😭😭😭😭#dsmp#philza
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for context: I read the hobbit first over the course of two years when I was like 13, but I'm only now starting to read lotr. having a blast tho!
anyways, reblog if you feel like it 🙌🏻
#lord of the rings#the hobbit#lotr#hobbit#yeah guys idk i just feel like most people read it really young#but jolkein is really wordy and idk how y'all got through that at 8 yo#my attention span could neverrrrrr#obviously not as wordy as like. les mis. but you know what i mean.#lots and lots of context all the time. love that for his worldbuilding not so much for my hold on the plot#and yes i have watched the movies#i didn't completely miss the cultural zeitgeist#yay first time making a poll! if you vote or read my tags this far you are a gem 🫶🏻#edit: i realize i spelled tolkien wrong. i feel like this proves my point#but also i feel like thats something you spell with your heart and not your mind
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xianle trio,,,,,,i love them dearly,,,,
#first actual tgcf fanart i've made in a while oh boy#maybe i'll make more :)#ANYWAY SCREAMING AND CRYING AND THROWING UP I LOOOOOVEEEE THESE IDIOTS#THEY'RE SO. MWAH#also im ngl i didn't really know which designs to use so i kinda just. did a fusion + my own thing LMAO apologies if it looks off#<3#art#my art#tian guan ci fu#tgcf#tgcf fanart#heaven officials blessing#heaven officials blessing fanart#fanart#xianle trio#mu qing#feng xin#xie lian#mxtx
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dedicating a whole page of my flash book to the special boy <33
#bg3#baldur's gate 3#astarion#tattoo design#dw i'll let you know the Second i'm allowed to use another person#i can't wait to do one of these for someone#i know i fucked up the point of the dagger i'll fix it later#i need to stop doing symmetrical designs on paper bc i'm not good at it#the arcane trickster one actually turned out really fucking cool i didn't think i'd like it when i started it
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I truly, TRULY do not know how to say this, because the fact that I have to say it makes me feel like I am losing my grip on reality. But no, in the post-capitalistic anarchist utopia, I will not be relying on “autistic minecraft girlies” to be building inspectors because - and this may shock you - one of those occupations takes years of education in how to read and interpret hundreds of thousands of lines of regulations based on complicated math and physics that were the result of decades of tragedy and death, and the other one involves playing a children’s video game.
#i am begging this website. BEGGING it. to stop acting like building codes are state oppression#and please stop reducing blue collar jobs to 'so easy any handyman could do it with a youtube video'#that's how people fucking die#i didn't spend five years learning how to do my job safely to watch people online tell me it could've just been a course in high school#i know that this is like. a minority minority opinion and not really worth getting worked up over#but it's so annoying to see supposed leftists denigrating blue collar jobs like this#same poster also opined that we won't need garbagemen#because 'if the trash is bothering people they'll figure out a way to clean it without having to pick it up'#like what??? does that even fucking mean????#construction
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I feel like many people have a fundamental misconception of what unreliable narrator means. It's simply a narrative vehicle not a character flaw or a sign that the character is a bad person. There are also many different types of unreliable narrators in fiction. Being an unreliable narrator doesn't necessarily mean that the character is 'wrong', it definitely doesn't mean that they're wrong about everything even if some aspects in their story are inaccurate, and only some unreliable narrators actively and consciously lie. Stories that have unreliable narrators also tend to deal with perception and memory and they often don't even have one objective truth, just different versions. It reflects real life where we know human memory is highly unreliable and vague and people can interpret same events very differently
#the way some people (usually lestat fans lol) talk about louis being an unreliable narrator has frustrated me#i still insist louis' unreliableness is mostly subtle (passing quickly over things he doesn't want to think about#presenting things that factually happened in a way he can build a story that makes sense to him#not knowing what lestat is thinking and feeling so interpreting him differently than lestat himself probably would)#rather than he's telling something that didn't really happen or is under armand's mind control or something#like for example i think it's been made very clear all the abuse really happened they're not gonna suddenly pull the rug from under it#if anything i feel lestat is going to turn out to be even worse than louis perceived him when we hear people who are not in love w him lol#keanu.txt
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