#i did this instead of writing an essay that is due tomorrow

[ae-therr]

dabihawks but their names are stinky and silly

[violentdevotion]

i love your actimel fridge posting keep it up

:D thank you !!!! Its more full than usual right now because the other day i went shop and got some and today my brother went to get groceries and my mum told him to get me some actimel while he was there so for at least the next 2 weeks i should be good on actimel !!!!

[the-wiggles]

Every time I add a silly little fic idea to my long list of things I’ll never get around to writing I ponder where I’d be if I didn’t make my personality for 5+ years around how much I hate writing

[maeby-cursed]

COFFEE CUPS AND THE EFFECTS OF FALLING IN LOVE | K. NANAMI

a/n: okay, this was supposed to be a quick drabble but i have an essay due tomorrow and decided to write eight hundred words of pure nanami fluff instead. (also, nanami is yuji's legal guardian in this because yolo).

✧ synopsis: nanami doesn’t fall in love. until a new coworker shows up on his office floor and turns his world upside down.

✧ pairings: kento nanami x f!reader

✧ wc: 890

✧ rating: pure self indulgent fluff !

Kento Nanami swears he doesn’t fall in love.

Falling in love is irrational, illogical. It’s a silly, whimsical infatuation experienced by childish people; like his work colleague – and constant annoyance – Satoru Gojo. People like him cannot control their feelings and always act upon instinct, that’s their problem.

But Kento Nanami doesn’t fall in love, he doesn’t smile sheepishly or giggle like a schoolboy, he doesn’t have time for such nonsense. He’s got taxes to do.

He doesn’t fall in love even when you come into the office that first day of August, with a pretty bag and shiny heels and a kind smile that stabs him in the stomach; the place where he keeps all things soft and unknown.

He doesn’t fall in love, yet when you come into his life, weird things start to happen.

He begins making extra coffee in the mornings, and he tells himself that it’s because his work days keep getting longer, but if he were honest to himself, he’d admit that he just packs it to offer it to you.

“I made extra but I don’t want it. I assure you.” Is what he says to you the first time you talk, stopping you on the way to the coffee machine.

He begins to feel excited about work, even if it’s just to see you walk by his desk on the way to the elevators twice a day, and he hides his smile poorly when you do so.

He combs his hair and shaves carefully and irons his ties. He pays attention to the idles chitchat his coworkers make, hoping to hear anything about his lovely new colleague.

He comes home and checks his emails, scouring them in search of your name.

He spends an entire evening researching a recipe he heard you mention during lunch and when he finally realizes what he’s doing – five hours deep into it – he cannot convince himself to care. Instead he tries to find out if you like wine the next day. And carnations. And men with blonde hair who never fall in love.

Five months go by since Kento Nanami meets you and of course he’s not in love.

Yet Gojo seems a little smugger nowadays, always leaning against your desk with his stare set on him. And Geto always seems to need to vacate the room whenever you enter, leaving you two alone. And Yuji begins to ask for you when he comes home late at night. 

Does he really talk about you that much? 

Eventually, you realize how strange his behavior is with you.

He glares at Gojo when he makes a harmless tease about you and Kento looking good together. He runs after Geto when you’re in the breakroom alone with him. He hides Yuji in his office whenever he drops by.

Does he really dislike you that much?

Eight months go by since Kento Nanami meets you and he begins trying to stay away from you, acting like it’s not a struggle.

You’re not used to people avoiding you for no reason, and his change of heart doesn’t go unnoticed, especially with how nice he was those first few weeks.

So when late February rolls around, cold and bitter, you knock on his office door.

“Mr. Nanami?” You call, shyly, from the outside of the room. You feel weird calling him mister, he’s barely older than you, but you don’t want to anger him any further.

“Come in.” He says, starting to panic. Why are you here? God, did you notice how weird he is around you? Did you catch him looking at your employee access card’s picture again? Did you figure out why you are the only one who finds a cup of coffee on her desk every morning?

“Uhm, I’m sorry to bother you so late, sir,” you say, your voice quiet and your gaze soft. It is late. About to be 10pm and he’s yet to pack his things; he was waiting for you.

He’s not in love.

“But I was just wondering… uhm, have I done anything to upset you?” His mouth falls slightly agape at your words and a frown settles deep between his eyebrows. It doesn’t suit him at all. You try to rectify. “I mean, it’s just… you seem a little odd lately! Not odd odd, just…” You groan and sigh. “I just feel like you’ve been avoiding me for the last few weeks and I’d like to know if I’ve done something, if I could fix it… sir.” You add with a small smile.

He looks at you dumbfounded, the first pure emotion you’ve seen on his face since you’ve met. His eyes find yours in a desperate attempt to crack you.

You think he’s angry? You think he’s bothered by you?

He’s infatuated, he’s smiling and giggling like a fool whenever you walk by, whenever you smile, whenever you drink his coffee and look into his eyes. Did you never catch him gazing at you? Don’t you know?

His resolve breaks at the confusion present in your face. 

The whole world has centered into that kind smile you have and he cannot fight it any longer. He’s not a stupid man, he knows when he’s lost, and when he’s about to win.

Kento Nanami is in love – with you. And it’s about time you know.

© 2023, MAEBY-CURSED — do not copy/repost/edit.

(reblogs are appreciated !!)

[sleepingpillscosmos]

OUR SEMISEMI ; eita semi

pairing: eita semi x fem!reader

warnings: suggestive (?) at some point

wc: 1.2k

requested: no

a/n: hello! this is the first time I write for haikyu, I hope I did a great job. feedbacks are always welcome, and requests are open!

if it's written like this it's a flashback, except for the last line of the fic.

Semi made his way in the boys' locker room to get ready for the evening practice. Most of his teammates were already there, some of them were already changed but waited for the others near the door, after all the coach wasn't there because he was on holiday so there would be only you, their manager, to help, so they could take today's practice easier.

"Hello" semi greeted, walking up to his locker to put his things away. He started to change his pants, putting on some volleyball shorts instead, then he took off his shirt to put on the t-shirt he wore to train. And just as he was about to slide his t-shirt on, Tendō, his fellow teammate, made his way over him.

"Semisemi" Tendō sang, taunting his friend, who just groaned and repeated, for the millionth time, to not call him that.

"I see someone had fun today..." Semi looked at Tendō in confusion, not understanding what he was trying to say. Tendō's words caught the attention of the other people in the looker room, who looked at the two.

Reon was the first to understand what Tendō was talking about and refrained from laughing. Semi glanced at Reon, asking with his eyes for at least a hint on the whole situation. His friend didn't say anything but pointed over his chest. Semi followed his gaze and finally realised. Part of his collarbone and chest was covered in hickeys. The boy felt the blush creeping on his cheeks and slid on his t-shirt to cover up what you did to him earlier.

Semi entered his dorm after taking a shower. His hair was still a little wet, and he was wearing only his sweatpants. He immediately went to his desk and opened his computer to at least try to finish the essay he had due tomorrow. He was so focused that he almost jumped when someone knocked at his door. He got up to open the door, only to find you.

"Hi love." you said in a sweet tone.

"Hi, something's wrong?" he asked, worried that something had happened. He was happy to see you, truly, but you didn't agree to see each other today. Both of you had work to do, you had some homework and he had his essay.

"No, nothing's wrong. I finished my homework and I just wanted to see you. I know you need to work on your essay, but can I stay anyway?" you smiled at Eita, he was always concerned about you, and you really appreciated that. He nodded, moving from the door to let you in his dorm. You visited his dorm quite a few times, you two preferred to pass your time together in a quiet place, where you could stay cuddled all day in bed. He returned to his desk while you made your way to his bed, making yourself comfortable.

After thirty minutes of staying on your phone you were bored, you looked over at Semi and saw that he was still working on his essay. You wanted to feel him, so an idea popped in your head. You quietly got up from his bed and walked up to him. He glanced at you in confusion, turning with his chair. You didn't say anything and sat on his lap, putting your arms around him so that you didn't disturb him. Semi smiled returning to his work, with you on his lap, leaving kisses on his neck, collarbone and naked chest.

He didn't notice that you leaved all this marks on him, and he didn't really care. The problem was that now he had to explain this to his teammates. They didn't know about your relationship, not because you didn't want to tell them, but you both liked the fact that it was something private, so you didn't tell anybody.

"None of your business." Semi simply replied, putting his things away and locking his locker.

"None of my business? I have to know who made all of this to our Semisemi" Tendō responded dropping his arm on his friend's shoulders, trying to tease him. Semi was about to answer back, but the team captain called everyone to start their training.

You were already in the gym when all the boys made their way into it to start their practice, you already filled their bottles and took the balls. After their usual laps and warm up, they started to train the aim of their serves.

Tendō approached you and you handled him his water. While he was drinking you scratched your collarbone, revealing your bruised skin under you t-shirt

"What's there?" Tendō smirked at you.

"What?" you asked, you didn't realise you just showed a hickey from about two days ago. But when Tendō pointed just below your neck, you understood and immediately blushed.

"I missed you" Semi whispered in between kisses. You two were in his dorm on his bed, his back leaning against the wall and you were sat on his lap, with your arms wrapped around his neck.

"We saw each other this morning at practice" you smirked.

"Yes, but it's all week that I see you only at practice or in the halls" he kept kissing you.

"Well, then we should make up for the lost time" you said grinning, feeling Semi mirroring your expression on your lips. You kept kissing, the kiss deepening as the seconds passed, only parting to let each of you take off your shirts. His kisses moved down your jaw and neck, only to get back to you lips. You were about to get free of your last pieces of clothing when Semi's phone rang.

"Sorry" he mumbled, receiving an reassuring smile from you.

"What do you want Tendō?" Semi answered the call moving his free hand up and down your thigh and you scoffed, obviously it was him. You couldn't hear what he was saying, so you waited for the call to end to ask your boyfriend.

"So?"

"He wants to know if we want to go to the convenience store with him, he said that he already asked the others and they all said no" he explained, you both agreed to go with him, even if he was annoying and interrupted you, he was still your friend.

You put your shirts back, share another kiss and leave Semi's dorm.

"Nothing" you quickly responded.

"Mhmh, how curious, Semi too was full of hickeys" you eyes widened and you felt your cheeks burning.

Suddenly, realisation hit Tendō.

"OUR SEMISEMI... WITH OUR Y/N?!" the redhead screamed at the top of his lungs, catching everyone's attention. All the team was shocked, and Semi covered his face with his hands from embarrassment.

Why did Tendō have to be so loud?

[enihk-writes]

[日久见人心]

characters: present!chung myung + afab!she/her!reader

baek cheon x afab!she/her!reader (implied and one-sided from the reader's end because they are not the main plot point for this fic lol)

summary: old habits die hard, even when you are born in a new body. to his credit, he does try not to seem like he is the reincarnation of the plum blossom sword saint, but his subconscious actions said otherwise. he didn't think you of all people would notice.

word count: 3.85k

author's note: the phrase 日久见人心 (rì jiǔ jiàn rén xīn) is part of the full saying 路遥知马力，日久见人心 (lù yáo zhī mǎ lì, rì jiǔ jiàn rén xīn) and i vaguely remember it was something my mother tongue teacher back in secondary said we could use in our composition essays or whatever,,,, and recently i saw it on those cringey rise-and-grind motivational crypto bro ig pages my ex-classmates are reposting on their stories which kinda gave me an idea lmao.... anyways the meaning of the quote is that we need to take time to understand a person's character (also the fic is the result of my caffeine overconsumption lol and not related to my previous cmxreader because i needed a break from all that angst romance i've been writing wwwwwwww)

═══════════════

chung myung has been starting to think that you were cut out from the same cloth as yu iseol.

quiet, aloof and always watching.

if someone said that you both were twins, he wouldn't be surprised. but then again, there were differences. the most obvious one was that iseol had more talent with the blade than you did, and the other was that iseol had no talent in actually taking care of herself. you were barely managing, but compared to your senior sister? it was far more decent. the two of you had tang soso to thank for not dying as fast as you could have.

chung myung. bowl.

he looks up to see your hand outstretched, waiting to pick up the empty bowl he'd cleaned off long ago. chung myung grunts and hands it over, propping his arm up and resting his head on it as he watched you go around the dining hall to collect the dinnerware.

you lived in mount hua, sure, but you weren't the fighting sort. maybe because anything you did could get you sick — if the weather dropped or rose a little too quickly, your body would tremble and shiver. did you move a little too much today? did you happen to sleep later than you were supposed to that night? by the next morning you were down with a terrible fever that kept you in your room for the rest of the day. but now that tang soso was here, she would drag you down to the medicine hall, grumbling under her breath, all while you looked at her teary-eyed and apologetic.

maybe it was out of shame or embarrassment that made you try to be yourself useful in other ways, though you would often fail and cause more trouble. everyone would just sigh and pick up after your mess, ushering you out to do something else.

during those days, he'd find you hunched behind the baths, sobbing in frustration. chung myung didn't know what to do or say, he'd always talked more with his fist before his heart, so he'd end up hiding in the trees to watch over you instead. and once you've cried it all out, you would stand, wash your face and go to bed. trying something else tomorrow.

chung myung gives credit where credit was due. for a sickly kid, you sure had a thicker skin than the others.

eventually, you stuck with being the cleaner. your weird, meticulous habits somehow working well in this job. the cups and plates were wiped till it shone, silverware were polished until you could see your own face and that hard-to-scrub dirt on the grout would be pristine and white when left in your hands. chung myung wonders secretly if maybe you'd picked this talent up from that neat freak baek cheon.

what are you thinking about?

he almost hits you out of instinct. you really were cut from the same cloth as yu iseol.

he lets out a shaky breath as he turns to face you, who had been sitting behind him. you look at him owlishly and he would have thought you weren't breathing if not for the movement of your nostrils. crossing his leg over the other, he juts his chin at you in acknowledgement.

what is it?

you're quieter, and thinking a lot more than normal today.

ah... this kid... how does everything that comes out of that mouth sound like an insult? chung myung tries to reign in his short temper, he didn't want to hit a frail person for no reason, and he knows that you just happen to always talk like that.

hm. i was thinking about you.

woah. pervert.

ah... maybe he should hit your head just once. just once and he'll never hit you again.

i'm kidding.

really? were you now?

i'm really kidding, don't go and look like you're going hit me like you do with our senior brothers.

okay, you were off the hook. for now.

hmph. you shouldn't tease your elders.

what elder.

chung myung forgets that you were the same age as him. well, in this body, not spiritually. but if he were to talk about life experience and reincarnation, he was the older one but fuck! you didn't know that! he didn't tell anyone he was the plum blossom sword saint ugh!

chung myung, are you going to have an aneurysm?

shut up!

═══════════════

winter in mount hua was really cold. and chung myung, surprisingly, didn't do so well with the cold. though, he would rather die than let anyone ever find out about that.

he wakes up early to train as usual, but the cold this morning was so biting, he was tempted to just stay in bed, it wasn't easy being an old man. ah, but the other disciples would be celebrating if he didn't appear for morning practice and that was no good. after all, the future of the sect still depended on him, didn't it?

he got dressed and stepped out of his room —

chung myung.

fuck! couldn't you talk to people like a normal person? why do you love to sneak up on people like this? cheong mun sa-hyung please, please, please give him patience and strength.

you look cold.

he was! great observation! chung myung wants to yell that to you with gritted teeth. he was still, unfortunately, very unnerved by how he couldn't feel your presence.

follow me. i have something for you.

you didn't wait for him to reply, instead grabbing his hand as you dragged him to the kitchen. he didn't try to resist, letting you pull him wherever, like a parent going to see what their child just found.

the two of you walk across the training grounds that had been buried under a blanket of pristine snow, the dim light of your paper lantern showing you the way. treading past and leaving two sets of footprints behind.

you push him into the kitchen, hanging the lantern up on a hook in the wall. chung myung notices the fire in the stone stove, you had already started it before going out to find him, probably because you were boiling something in that pot standing over the fire. chung myung sits on the ground, huddling before the blaze, it felt warm and comforting in the kitchen. the sound of water boiling in the pot and the crackling of the charred wood its heat blowing across his frigid face was, unsurprisingly, giving him a boost of energy.

you carefully move the pot to the side, removing the lid to check the contents in it. looking pleased with the result, you take out a bowl still steaming into your hands and placed it on the ground between you and chung myung as quickly as you could.

he looks over curiously. it looked like some kind of pudding, he doesn't think he's seen it before —

it's milk pudding, with lotus seeds and almonds

oh? he pondered, eyeing the bowl as you handed him a spoon.

aren't these ingredients used to make mooncakes?

chung myung asks, folding his arms. he notices that you were avoiding his gaze. don't tell him you...?

did you steal these from the warehouse?

hey! steal is a strong word!

oh i'm sorry, your highness, did you perhaps take the ingredients from the fucking warehouse?

he scoffed mockingly, exaggerating his manner of speech in mild irritation. he laughed at your grimace and pouty expression. ah, he feels like he's making fun of a toddler, he should be ashamed for bullying a kid at his age.

hm, he hasn't done something this juvenile in a long time. it was oddly nostalgic, in a way. he mused, digging into the soft and smooth surface of the pudding with the spoon, trying to scoop up the lotus seeds and almonds in it too.

mmh. 's not bad.

wow, i didn't know you knew how to compliment people

should i take that back then?

i'm sorry.

═══════════════

you had been working hard in cleaning the floors for spring cleaning. but the boys were so heavy-footed and honestly far too uninterested in their surroundings that the well-polished wooden floorboards you were really proud of was always dusty.

should you just barricade the entrance of the dorms until nightfall? just so they wouldn't walk all over your hard work?

you sit on the steps, your hair tied into a scarf, head resting on the propped broom you held between your legs. thinking long and hard over your predicament while looking over at the training grounds where chung myung was drilling down on everyone else.

the sun hung high in the cloudless afternoon sky, its rays casting down on the compound harshly. you were beginning to feel dizzy and closed your eyes, hoping to relieve the pain growing in your head.

you didn't hear anything outside the constant ringing in your ears, so one can only imagine your surprise when the reddish tint you saw while your eyes were closed grew dark.

who?

you cracked open your eyes to try and make out the person standing before you, wincing when the bright light nearly blinded you.

a familiar chuckle graced your ears as the ringing grew quiet. ah, it was senior baek cheon.

he taps the bamboo flask against your forehead, the water in it swishing against the walls. you take it, grateful, chugging down the contents, choking on it a little when a few drops went down the wrong pipe.

hey, hey... slow down... no one's going to take it away from you...

you cough, turning away in embarrassment. baek cheon sits down next to you on the steps, watching your antics in quiet amusement. you didn't want to look at him, not when he was practically topless, with his hair tied up high and swept over his shoulder.

chung myung looks at the scene from afar, not really clocking anything in his mind until he sees the way you were trying to scoot a little further away like a snail touching salt and your hands covering up your cheeks.

oh.

oh?

so you and baek cheon huh?

chung myung feels the cogs in his brain turn. at times like these he wishes he had someone to talk about this with, maybe tang bo. he would have loved to hear about petty gossip like this, and they could have teased the kids like the old men they were.

so you think something is going on between her and baek cheon sasuk too, huh?

jo-gul's voice comes up from behind, and chung myung didn't need to look over to see the guy's eyes trained on his targets.

if you have so much free time to discuss other people's love lives, i think we can continue with our training right, sahyungs?

chung myung called out loudly for everyone to hear.

jo-gul you fucking bastard!

you and your big mouth...

ugh... i can't get up...

the poor guy could only hang his head in quiet embarrassment. baek cheon laughed at the antics of the others, getting up to walk back to the training grounds. but not before he reached out to tuck a stray strand of your hair behind your ear.

if you're going to rest, do it in the shade. i don't think you want to fall ill again tomorrow, do you?

he asks, and you shake your head in response.

mmh. i'll see you around?

see you...

you wave meekly as he left, your insides going through an entire acrobatics routine. wondering what that short exchange was all about. it couldn't be that he liked you back? or did he catch onto your growing crush? you wanted to throw yourself off the cliff.

═══════════════

i didn't take you for a guy that had habits like this.

chung myung gulped down the last of the warm water in his cup, setting it down on the counter, and looked at you quizzically. your elbows were propped up over the edge of the counter and you were perched on the stool in a rather un-ladylike manner.

it's good for your health you know.

psh... isn't that an old wives tale?

he scoffs and shakes his head.

haah...

he sighs.

the young people these days.

you look at him, head tilted in confusion. humming for a bit, you let your thoughts simmer before you decided to pose the question.

hey, why'd you speak like that?

chung myung pauses.

like what?

you know... like an old man?

he sucks in a quick breath. there was no way you of all people would have figured it out, right?

he felt like he was spiralling into a bit of a panic.

hey.

you snap your fingers in his face, moving to stand beside him while he was deep in thought.

earth to chung myung?

he looks at you.

he takes a good look at you.

you were not the brightest bulb in the bush, or however that saying goes, at least when compared to him. there was no way you connected the dots and figured out he was the plum blossom sword saint. yeah, this was for sure a case of the right formula and the wrong answer.

he had to divert your thoughts before you start to think deeper.

i think i hear baek cheon sasuk coming over.

huh?

it was your turn to panic a little, and he darts out of the kitchen to escape what would have been your incoming torrent of scrutiny. you realise just then that you had been completely bamboozled by the bastard chung myung.

running to the door, you yell out a string of curses at the run-away instigator. ah, your blood pressure...

═══════════════

you think chung myung might have been raised by old people. because there was no other plausible reason that he acts the way he does.

sometimes he walks with his hands behind his back, and while most people your age would stand straight and position their arms in a stiff way, chung myung puts his hands on his lower back — like he was supporting it. you know who else does this? the sect leader and the other elders. and it doesn't help his case that he was always slouching a little.

another thing you notice was how his taste in food was a few notches blander than the rest of you. he wasn't fond of anything too salty or sour or anything undercooked. he'd always pick out the softest parts of any cooked meat, saying it was the juiciest, which was somewhat believable. but then wasn't it also nearest to where the animals organs used to be before it was gutted? wouldn't it taste bitter?

speaking of bitter, chung myung liked to eat food that made you squeamish. he'd nag at the nutritional value of them and when nobody wanted to try it out, he'd mumble something about kids these days not knowing what's good for them and scarf it down by himself.

that was another thing about him, why was he always calling you a kid when you were the same age as him? it wasn't that big of a deal for you. but calling the other seniors kids? you wondered if it was his way of showing his martial superiority in a twisted way, or if it was another underlying reason.

surely, it must be because he was raised by the elderly.

god, you were so smart, weren't you? connecting the dots like that?

═══════════════

chung myung was sure you were dropped on the head as an infant.

you had cornered him in the toilets. broke down and the door and everything, just to ask him who he was raised by. it was ridiculous, the scene that was folding out right then and he chooses to ignore that your weak body had somehow broken down a fucking wooden door. he has to ignore that, for his own sanity.

you were on the walls, hands clawing and feet digging on the rough surface. chung myung shirks away, exasperated. somewhere in the afterlife, he thinks he could hear the loud cackle of his friends at his predicament.

chung myung.

he tries to evade eye contact.

chung myung.

oh man, look at that spider on the ceiling spinning a web.

hey where are you looking? i'm over here.

he finally looks at you turning his head slowly.

uh... i think... you might be a bit too close...

a bit too close was a forgiving statement. your head had craned forward far enough that your face was almost less than a centimetre away from his.

you lean back at his reply. still not keeping your eyes off him. after all, he still hadn't answered your question.

you know that i'm an orphan... right?

yeah. so am i.

i wasn't raised by anybody...

oh.

you step back, pondering for a moment. chung myung feels the breath he was holding leave his lungs. you caused him so much anxiety. remember when he thought you were cut from the same cloth as yu iseol? he stands corrected, but you were insane in the opposite direction.

okay. so who raised you?

chung myung feels his eye twitch. why were you asking the same thing? he already told you!

i'm telling you—!

nuh-uh. that's not what i want to know. i want to know if you grew up with old people.

then you should have asked that from the beginning!

i panicked, okay?

he sighs, deeply, and covers his face in his hands. he feels his miraculous second life leaving his body at this exchange.

to answer your question. no, i didn't.

huh. i see.

you answer simply.

chung myung peeks at you through his fingers, surprised at your unusual silence. you, on the other hand, had grown more confused by his answer. if he hadn't been raised by the elderly, then how would anybody act the way he did? not to mention, he had knowledge of niche historical facts that nobody other than a person living in that time would have known of.

can i go now?

huh? oh yeah... sure...? oh! wait—!

you had answered too absentmindedly! you weren't done questioning him! shit! the slippery bastard had gotten away!

you jog out the door, only to bump into someone when turning a corner. a pair of arms catch you from falling. looking up you were met with baek cheon's worried gaze, which morphed into confusion when he realized at the same time as you did that you had ran out of the boys' toilets.

uh... wait... i can explain...

you wondered if a lighting bolt could strike down in broad daylight.

═══════════════

you were sulking in the kitchen.

the guy you had a somewhat infatuation with caught you in an embarrassing moment. you had convinced yourself all chances you had with him were ruined. this was all chung myung's fault. every time you had the slightest inconvenience you would secretly curse him out a little in your heart. you used to feel bad when you still had a working conscience, but not anymore though.

speak of the devil, and he comes walking in.

chung myung came in to ransack the cellar behind the kitchen for wine. he had been craving it for the past few days after his own stash ran out. he had waited for everyone else to be asleep before sneaking in as quietly as he could.

so one can only imagine the shock he felt, even though he swears he had already seen it all, when he finds your shadowy figure sitting crossed-legged on the counter and your two eyes staring right back at him in the darkness.

keugh—!

chung myung bites back a scream. fuck! can he please have one, one. peaceful day where you didn't fuck around with his psyche?

you didn't know he was coming in so soon. but you didn't care much since you had something to give him anyway.

shoving the lacquer box engraved with floral designs into his chest, you motion for him to take a look inside. chung mying complied, hesitantly lifting off the lid to find rows of thin mooncakes, without the egg yolks probably, and another layer under that was filled with a flaky-looking biscuit.

it's called tau sar piah.

he hums, taking the round ball out to inspect it. shrugging, he popped it into his mouth and chews down on the pastry. the flavour, it was familiar. he thinks, was it—?

dried mung bean paste?

you nodded, grinning.

what's this for though?

don't tell me you forgot.

forget? what did he forget?

it's your birthday you goon. well, in a few hours but still.

oh. he had forgotten, momentarily. you really were a good kid, remembering this old man's birthday and making something for him. shit, chung myung thinks he might tear up. was this what it was like to have grandchildren? he thinks he understands why cheong mun sa-hyung might have suggested he take on disciples of his own, or well, trusted him enough to babysit the children of the sect back then. ugh, he was a grandfather after all, and you were somehow his most troublesome child.

he sniffles. closing the lid on the box and grabbing the wine. well, it would be lonely to eat all of this on his own, and waking up the others would be too much of a hassle. suppose you would make do as his drinking buddy tonight. hooking an arm under your knees, he slings you over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. the other grabbing the food and drink.

he jumps on the roofs until he brings you to a spot where the moon felt the closest. he drops you on your feet as you balance yourself on the uneven shingles. chung myung plopped down, leg crossed over the other, as he began to down the wine straight from the bottle.

he hands you the lid of the box, picking out the mooncake and biting into it.

wow. tastes kinda ass.

ugh, ungrateful much?

i never said i wouldn't eat it.

can't you just say your appreciation like a normal person?

a pause.

...thank you.

chung myung replied in a softer voice.

hmph. see? that wasn't so hard?

you huffed, teasing him.

chung myung only scoffed and rolled his eyes.

the night drudged on, and you spent the time talking about everything and nothing. things that happened that week, gossip you've heard, events that had happened in the past, antics of the other sect members...

chung myung feels his eyelids grow heavy. was it alright to rest his grieving heart for a while on his birthday? cheong mun sa-hyung and the others' surely wouldn't mind.

and as he feels himself drifting off to sleep, your voice quips up.

hey, do you think i should confess to sasuk?

psh—!

chung myung spits out the wine in his mouth, choking on the liquid that went up and out his nose. it felt as though he was vomiting out blood from that question alone.

you were really his most troublesome kid.

[missys-mansion-of-mistakes]

Weekly Wrap-Up

July 22nd, 2024 - July 28, 2024

🌸 This week has been pretty great overall. Let's review what I managed to get done:

Two visits to my parents. One for the car, one for the garage sale.

Submitted 5 scholarship essays

Deposited 5 checks that have been sitting around

Cleaned out my car/fridge. They're very neat now

Went grocery shopping instead of procrastinating it

Ordered two new chargers. One for my office, one for home

Fixed up a chapter of the book I'm writing for NaNoWriMo and posted it in the writing group for folks to workshop today

Researched 10 different programs for my conference presentation

Sent in the BOD application. Even though it was auto-rejected (due to number of applicants) I still finally sent it in

Did my nails for the new job, then took them off (didn't like them)

🏫 School is rapidly approaching. Mid-to-late August. I wanted to apply to 100 scholarships before school starts, but at this rate, it'll be more like 50. I still have around 3 weeks left so... guess we'll see. Gonna increase the rate I work at.

🎧 My pink headphones I've had since... it has to be since 2020 finally gave up the ghost. They underwent some heavy daily use, and spent a short stint of time in a garage when I was between houses, so I'm honestly shocked they lasted 4 years. I just went to lay down while I was wearing them a few days ago, something went CRACK in the left ear, and since then it was a right-ear-only headphone 🤡 Thankfully I had brand-new extras in my closet I ordered because I thought these broke previously but hadn't-- the cord was just loose-- and so I wasn't bothered in the least. Awesome.

🎤 Nervous for the upcoming conference in... a week and a half. I know I'm prepared to write my piece of the deliverables (the powerpoint, the presentation) but I'm not convinced my co-presenters are. Tomorrow, I need to ask them more directly if they're able to answer several questions pertaining to our topic-- because that's what we need to put in the slides. They only have like 3 days left to research enough to rectify that if they aren't. And I understand some people operate on a last-minute based work schedule, but I'm not. It's important we get this DONE.

💼 Work for the upcoming week should be smooth enough. Still settling into my new role and trying to figure out what would be best to change/adapt for the program. I need to brainstorm some more while I'm at work and figure all that out.

Good things ahead, I know it!

[Photos: heart-shaped lipstick I got from a mystery box, unidentified flowers from my family's garden, new pink headphones, bullet journal entry, postcards on my wall (detail), postcards on my wall with ivy.]

[sharpfamily]

The Essay Escapade

There are no lengths at which a good brother won’t go in order to help his sister in need.

*** Just popping in to let you all know that I have a brief description of each of the Sharp children at the very end of this, just in case you want to know a little bit about them. Also at this point in time, Aesop is retired from teaching and runs a successful potions shop with his wife in the hamlet where they both live. ***

Massive, massive MASSIVE shout out to @aesopsharpmybeloved for letting me play in your sandbox and making me believe I could write something that people would actually enjoy reading. This is a companion piece to her series A New Chance at Life and if you haven’t read it what are you even doing here!

- Tea-withjamandbread

It was late, far too late to still be awake, however Theodore Sharp was unable to fall asleep. It made sense, really. As the middle of the semester approached, so did exams and essay deadlines. The fifth year Slytherin had a lot on his mind.

Call it intuition, call it a special “twin bond” like their mother often described it, but something told Theodore he didn’t really need sleep at the moment, not while Natty needed him. So he grabbed his wand and got dressed as quietly as he could before leaving his dorm room headed towards the common room. He wasn’t at all surprised to find his twin sister sitting at the table closest to the fireplace, it was her favorite spot after all. He was surprised, however, to find her surrounded by books, furiously writing on what seemed to be quite the long piece of parchment, tears forming in her eyes.

“Hey there Nat”

The girl barely slowed down her writing. “Theo. It’s late. You should be asleep.”

"Could say the same about you" Theodore placed a hand on his sister's, forcing her to stop what she was doing for a moment. “What’s that you’re working on?” The boy was genuinely confused. Judging by the furious pace at which his sister was writing, he could only deduce she was in the middle of writing an entire essay. While it wasn’t unusual for him to wait until the very last minute to finish his work, Natty was always far more organized than this and seemed to always have her work finished days before it was due for being turned in.

“My DADA essay.” Theo was no Auror (yet) but he distinctly remembered his sister mentioning she had finished writing it last week. “Why are you re-writing your DADA essay? I’m sure the one you already wrote was good enough to”

“I lost it!”

“What?”

“I’m such an idiot Theo!”

“Stop that. I’m supposed to be the dramatic one between the two of us, not you. How did you lose it?”

“I was looking through everything for tomorrow’s classes and I couldn’t find it anywhere. What I DID find though is this.” She pulls out a letter addressed to her parents, back home. “I must have accidentally sent Mum and Dad my essay instead of…” She burst into tears. “So I have to re-write the whole thing now because there’s no way for me to get it back in time to turn it in first thing tomorrow!”

"Maybe if you write to them, they could send it here in time for first class?"

"Even if I DID write to them right now they wouldn't have time to send it… It's due first thing tomorrow morning and you know Mum and Dad, they're not exactly… morning people"

An idea formed in Theodore's brain. It was madness to be certain, he'd be breaking about half a dozen school rules, not to mention it could prove dangerous. "I'll go fetch it then"

Natty looked at her twin like he had grown a second head.

"You're mad"

"I'm assure you I’m not"

"You're going to fly miles away from school and then what? Break into the parents' house?"

"Not exactly. I’m going to use the floo and run the rest of the way! It’ll be good exercise! Plus does it really count as breaking in if you have the key?"

"You're going to get caught"

"Dad's a heavy sleeper"

"Dad used to be an Auror!"

"Yeah I think I've heard him mention that once or twice"

"So you KNOW he'll wake up to the sound of someone in the house when he's not expecting company. Besides, Mum's a light sleeper!"

"And she'll be SO happy to see me IF I get caught, which I don't intend on having happen!”

Natalie looked at the essay she was currently attempting to re-write. It was a mess. Barely legible and when she tried to make sense of the paragraph she had just finished, she knew she couldn't turn this in tomorrow and hope for a good grade. Professor Sallow did have a soft spot for her and her siblings, but that would only help her so much.

"Do it."

"Brilliant! I'll be back in less than an hour!"

Theodore quickly hugged his sister then started walking towards the common room door.

"Wait!" Natalie rushed towards him. "Bring this to them please" She handed her brother the letter she had meant to send her parents earlier that same day.

"Sure thing!"

"Thank you."

"Anything for you, sis!"

With one last hug to his slightly less nervous sister, Theodore was on his way.

—-—————

Theodore slowed down his sprint as he approached his childhood home. The sight before him was everything he was hoping for. The chimney had the faintest trace of smoke, indicating that the fires warming the home were mere embers at the moment, and all the windows appeared dark, indicating the occupants of the house were fast asleep. He took a quick peek to the back of the house, where the window leading to his father’s cellar was located. He knew sometimes his father brewed late into the night, however tonight did not appear to be one of those nights.

It occurred to him at that moment that it really wouldn’t be the end of the world if his parents knew he’d visited. He could probably knock on the door and politely ask if he could have Natty’s essay, deliver his letter, get mildly scolded for being away from school after curfew, perhaps he’d be lucky enough to get his hand on some of his mother’s baked goods before going on his merry way. However, if he was being honest with himself, he wanted to know if he could be successful at avoiding detection. Plus, he had promised his sister he wouldn’t get caught and Theodore Ashley Sharp was a man of his word, or at least, he tried his very best to be.

Theodore knows he needs to be as quiet as can be. He didn't want to get caught after all. He cast a disillusionment charm over himself for good measure, although he really didn't think it was needed. This was his childhood home and he knew it like the back of his hand. He knew exactly which floorboards creaked when stepped on and created a mental map of his shortest path from the front door to the drawer where he knew his parents kept their correspondence.

He quietly unlocked the door and stepped inside. The faintest ruffling of feathers to his left caught his attention. Diana. The owl had been a part of their family since before they were even a family from the stories he had been told as a child, and had been retired from messenger duty some number of years ago. Theodore had anticipated the necessity of keeping her quiet and quietly but decisively, reached into his left pocket and grabbed a handful of treats. He extended his arm towards her, hoping his bribe would buy him precious minutes as he continued on with his mission.

He must admit he felt a little ridiculous, hopping from plank to plank, avoiding the ones he knew to be noisy. He wouldn't at all be surprised to learn that these particular planks were left in their squeaky state in order to make it impossible for his siblings and himself to move about the house at night without alerting their parents.

Theodore made his way from the foyer, past the staircase, through the family room, and into the kitchen, moving to stand in front of the exact drawer he knew his parents kept their mail, successfully avoiding each and every problem plank. "The student surpasses the potions master" he thought to himself. He opened the drawer and pulled out a stack of papers, looking for his sister's essay. However, no matter how hard he looked, all he was met with was correspondence regarding his parents' potions shop. Orders, ingredient lists, accounting papers, more orders, more accounting… no essay. He put the papers back in the drawer and gently closed it. He took a few seconds to breathe, feeling his face redden and his pulse quicken. Natty was counting on him. He had promised her he'd get that essay back for her. He wasn't always the perfect brother, but he prided himself on never going back on his word, on never making a promise he didn't intend to keep. He racked his brain as to where his parents would have put the essay when his thoughts were suddenly interrupted.

"Lumos"

A bright light came from behind Theodore and the boy froze, hoping his disillusionment charm was strong enough to withstand the scrutiny of the ex-Auror who had just cast the wand-lighting charm. He had no idea his father had woken, didn’t hear him coming down the stairs at all. He supposed he still had much to learn in terms of how to move about completely undetected. He hadn’t been caught yet, though, and he had some elements working in his favor. Perhaps his father was too sleepy to notice him, although he doubted that. He knew the man probably wasn't wearing his glasses and so maybe, just maybe he still stood a chance in completing his mission undetected.

However the bright light coming from his father's wand had caused the faintest shadow of his form to appear on the wall in front of him. Despite his very best efforts, the boy had been caught.

"Your disillusionment charm has improved, Theodore, but it's still not good enough to fool me."

Theodore promptly dropped the charm and turned to face his father, who lowered his wand and used it to reignite the fire in the hearth to provide a warm light and additional warmth to the room. He wore his dressing gown and Theodore could only imagine he was wearing his nightshirt underneath. His face showed a mixture of tiredness, confusion, slight annoyance and he thought he also detected a hint of amusement.

“How did you know it was me?”

“Maggie’s in America, Eleazar’s never been one for sneaking around and Natty’s disillusionment charm is frankly better than yours. The house is warded to alert us of any other intruders, so that leaves only one suspect, you."

“What gave me away?"

His father deflected

"I'm sure there must be an excellent explanation to your late night, actually, by now, early morning visit. One that also explains why you're currently rifling through your mother's and my private correspondence."

"Actually there IS an explanation"

"I'd love to hear it, sooner rather than later, please."

"I'm here because Nat"

"THEODORE!"

Theo promptly finds himself wrapped in his mother's tight embrace. "What are you doing here? Sneaking out of school in the dead of night, what's gotten into you?"

"From what I gather from the stories you told us Mum, I get this from you"

She loosened her embrace but still kept her hands on her son's shoulders. "Oh hush now, at least I had the good sense to never get caught by your father!"

"That's not entirely accurate darling…" Aesop reached for his wife and pulled her against him, breaking the link between her and their intruder and wrapping his arms around her waist, kissing the back of her head. "I distinctly remember catching you a handful of times sneaking about the castle" She melted into her husband's embrace. "Only because I wanted you to catch me, Ace"

"If you both don't mind I'm here for Natty's DADA essay. She accidentally sent it to you instead of this and it's due first thing tomorrow" Theodore handed his parents his sister’s letter to them. “I told her I'd come and correct her mistake, deliver her letter and retrieve it. If you could just tell me where it is, I will go fetch it, be on my merry way and let you both carry on with whatever it is I don’t want to think about you doing when we’re not home.”

Aesop chuckled as (F/N) spoke.

“I’m guessing she didn’t get our note then?”

“She didn’t say anything about a note, she was too busy trying to re-write her essay from memory!”

“Oh Nat, poor thing…”

(F/N) looked at her son

“We got her essay, and we read it. It was really, really good and obviously finished so we sent it directly to Professor Sallow after dinner, along with a note to Natty letting her know not to worry about it. I’m guessing the poor owl must have forgotten about the second delivery.”

“Or delivered it to Eleazar, wouldn’t be the first time our mail got all messed up”

“Blasted, unreliable school owls.”

“We really need to get another owl Ace, with Maggie in America now and the shop doing as well as it is, Babbity could use some help.”

“Agreed.” Aesop addressed his son

“In any case, her essay is where it needs to be and if Professor Sallow hasn’t received it, have him owl me, and I’ll make sure Nat gets the O she deserves.”

Theodore looked at his parents. Tonight had turned out to be a failed mission for him. He got caught AND he didn’t retrieve his sister’s essay. He was happy though. Happy to be home, happy to be with his parents for just a little while.

"Are you hungry, dear?"

"Nah, I'm good. Ate one too many servings of mutton stew for dinner"

His eyes fell on a plate of his mother's scones.

“On second thought I'm starving Mum, they BARELY feed us at the school, you know"

(F/N) chuckled as she summoned a plate and some scones. Theodore scarfed down the first in two bites, and reached for a second one, as his mother busied herself, packing the rest of the pastries in a cloth bag for her son to bring back to Hogwarts.

“Don’t forget to share." she reminds him, as she hands him the bag.

“I should probably get going… I told Natty I’d be back within the hour and I’m cutting it close”

"Just a moment, I have something for you to bring to your sister."

His father turned and unlocked a cabinet that held a variety of potions

"Ooh, contraband!"

Aesop let out a chuckle as he handed a vial to his son.

"Wideye. She'll need it tomorrow. If I know Natty, she still won't sleep a wink tonight"

"Don't I get one too?"

"Do you want to be an Auror someday?"

"You know I do"

"Then in addition to perfecting your disillusionment charm you also need to master the art of the power nap. Learn how to function for long hours with little to no sleep."

"You're joking"

"I'm not. But there will be plenty of time for that. In the meantime here's one for you too, as well this."

His father hands him a third vial. Theodore doesn't need to read the label to know what it contains. Invisibility potion.

"This one's pretty strong, should buy you about a minute. Use it wisely."

“Anything for Eleazar while we’re at it?”

“I’m sure Eleazar already brews his own contraband.”

Theodore chuckled. Eleazar did have a natural knack for potions and always had a true passion for the subject, the art came as naturally to him as walking it seemed at times. Even Aesop couldn’t say as much about himself, having gone from quite the average student to graduating with the best potions marks in his class thanks to hard work and a drive to reach the top of his field.

“Anything else before the Sharp Delivery Service heads back to his common room?”

“No, that’ll be all” his mother says, as she pulls him into another bone crushing hug. “You’re a great son, and an amazing brother. We’re so proud of you. I love you, Theodore.”

“I love you too, Mum”

He looked up at his father, while still tightly hugging his mother.

"You never told me what gave me away. I know my disillusionment isn't quite up to snuff yet but that's not what woke you up though"

"The front door. It has a very distinct squeak when it opens. Imperceptible from the outside but can be heard from our bedroom. I could fix it, but I choose not to. That's what gave you away tonight. I must say though, I was impressed at how you managed to avoid all the bad floorboards. Well done."

"Thanks Dad. I love you."

"I love you too, son."

Aesop joined in the hug for a moment, then gently took his wife’s hands into his own, releasing their son from her tight embrace.

“Be safe on your way back”

Both parents stayed in the doorway, arms around each other, watching as their youngest son sprinted towards the closest floo flame.

————————

Theodore didn’t waste his invisibility potion sneaking back into the castle. He was smarter than that. He knew the prefects and professors were fast asleep at that time, and his disillusionment charm, while still needing some work, was still good enough to shield him from the portraits and the ghosts roaming the castle. He didn’t hear Peeves in the vicinity, so the walk back to the Slytherin common room was easy and uneventful.

He was greeted by the sight of his sister, who had abandoned her attempted re-write, and appeared immersed in the book she was reading. A quick glance at the cover revealed that she was reading one of her favorite novels. To think that his sister would trust him so completely as to abandon her contingency plan in favor of re-visiting one of her favorite stories made his heart swell. This evening hadn’t gone according to plan, but he hoped that he’d at least be able to calm down her anxieties and maybe, just maybe, she would get a couple hours of sleep tonight.

Natty looked up from her book and took in the sight of her brother, scones and potions in hand.

"Theo? Are you OK?"

"Brilliant, actually" he says as he took a bite out of a scone

"Did someone cast the confundus charm on you?"

"I don't... think so. Why do you ask?" he took another bite

"I see scones, I see potions, do you know what I DON'T see?"

"Oh, yeah... that"

Natty put her head in her hands

"Theodore!"

He put his hand on her shoulder

"Relax Nat. They already turned it in for you."

Natty looked up at her brother, who had the biggest smile on his face.

"They... what?"

"They noticed you had sent them your essay by accident, proof-read it and owl'd it directly to Professor Sallow. Probably sounded something like this

Theodore stepped back and put on his best impression of their mother.

"Oh Ace! Our darling daughter must have sent us her essay by accident! Poor thing must be so nervous right now but I really don't understand why, this essay is incredible! I couldn't have written it better myself!"

Then Dad probably went "I can tell no shortcuts were taken when writing this paper, well done Natty, this deserves an O and nothing less!"

"I shall send it to my good friend Sebastian at Hogwarts right away! However I absolutely won't also ask about how the children are doing because that would be inappropriate"

"Wonderful idea darling. Once you're done I know something inappropriate you and I could"

"STOP IT THEO! Please. Before I need to cast scourgify on my brain!"

Theodore put an end to his re-enactment, looked at his sister, and handed her a pastry. "Scone?"

Natty took the pastry from her brother wordlessly. He could be quite ridiculous at times, but always knew just how to cheer her up. She couldn't have conjured a better twin if she tried. As Theodore sat on the sofa next to her, she was able to sense that, beneath his playful charade, something was bothering him.

"How long did it take for Dad to catch you?"

Theodore sighed.

"He was onto me the moment I opened the front door. Let me get all the way to the kitchen though, before revealing himself, I think he took pity on me."

"Wow, that's actually pretty impressive"

"Yeah… it is. I don’t know how he does it to be honest."

“He’s been doing it for years Theo, for longer than we’ve been alive. It used to be his job, and it’ll be your job one day, too. I know you’ll be a great Auror one day. So you got caught by Dad. At least you got to say hi to him and Mum, that must have been nice.”

Theodore placed his arm around his sister, pulling her towards him.

“It was. Wish you could have been there, I know you miss them, too.”

“Winter holidays will be here before we know it.” Natty’s voice started to betray the fact that she was fighting sleep. “Hey, you were able to sneak in and out of school undetected, that counts for something doesn't it?"

"I guess it does. I'll outsmart Dad next time." Theodore says, wistfully.

Natty yawned as she curled onto the sofa, resting her head on her brother’s lap. "Good luck with that."

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Theodore didn’t get an answer to his question, Natty had fallen fast asleep. He summoned a blanket from the chair across them and draped it around his sleeping sister. He was glad to have been able to be there for her, to be a good brother to her in her moment of need, to calm her anxieties to the point that her mind was able to so quickly surrender to sleep. Happy with himself, he propped his feet up on the coffee table in front of him, leaned his head back against the plush upholstery, and fell asleep as well.

—————————

A/N a brief description of the Sharp children at the time of this fanfiction

Magdala Dinah "Maggie" Sharp

Slytherin

Recently graduated, named after her grandmother and her father's closest friend. Fiercely intelligent, confident, but also quite humble. Te ringleader of the 4 Sharp children. Has had a lifelong passion for beasts, moved to America to study beasts native to the continent

Eleazar Sebastian Sharp

Ravenclaw

7th year, head boy, named after his mother's mentor as well as one of her closest friends. Quiet and a little shy, very kind and compassionate Demonstrated a knack for potion making practically before he showed signs of magic, and the only Sharp child to have yet to receive detention.

Theodore Ashley Sharp

Slytherin

5th year, named after his grandfather as well as his father's late partner. Has wanted to be an Auror for as long as he can remember, will do anything for his family and particularly his twin sister. He knows he's got charm and charisma and he's not afraid to use them to get out of trouble. Still didn't save him from landing himself in detention on his first week of school!

(F/N) Natalie "Natty" Sharp

Slytherin

5th year, named after her mother as well as one of her mother's closest friend. Prefers to go by her middle name because being named after the "Hero of Hogwarts" combined with her own exceptionally strong magic made it difficult for her to carve her own identity. A master negotiator with a quick wit, she can spot a lie from a mile away., Can usually keep her brother in check, and is organized enough for the two of them.

[study-with-aura]

Friday, February 23, 2024

I am posting this on Saturday because H's mom needed to drop her off early since something came up on her end, so I never got the chance to post my Friday update. We had fun though. I still had my piano practice to do, so while I practiced, she worked on a few things that she needed to finish. On the other hand, she did say that my playing was beautiful, and I was elated to hear.

H also plays, but she goes back and forth between enjoying it and doing it because she wants to be done with it and her mom wants her to at least complete Level 10 and then if she wants to stop, she at least knows how to play extremely well in case she ever wants to come back to it in the future. I told H a while back when that was decided that I agreed with her Mom. It was good to at least have the knowledge as she didn't know what she would want in her future, so she plays often when she's in the mood and not often enough when she has no motivation. It works for her, so who am I to say anything?

I plan on doing ARCT and then I'll feel like I've mastered to where I want to be. I'm a completionist, and I actually do enjoy playing. It's why I'm trying to find more time. I want to finish by the time I finish my HS studies, but I also heard that I need ample time for the ARCT since it's a whole other level. If I pass my Level 9 exams, then I can start Level 10 and plan on completing that by the end 10th grade and then I would have two years to prepare for the ARCT exam. That's my plan anyway. My parents don't really care what I do as long I continue to enjoy playing. It's merely hard to find the time to practice! I can only do it by cutting short my supplemental study time, which I have done, but I don't really need a full 2-3 hours for that since I cut my reading down to only one extra book at a time instead of a supplemental book and a fun book along with assigned readings.

Am I doing too much? Sometimes I feel like I'm not doing enough at all.

It's time to practice again. I'll try to update about today (Saturday) a bit later.

Tasks Completed:

Geometry - Reviewed solving systems of equations graphically + reviewed equations of parallel and perpendicular lines + learned to find the distance between a point and a line + learned to find the shortest distance between two parallel lines + practice + honors work

Lit and Comp II - Reviewed Unit 16-18 vocabulary + read second part of chapter 26 of Emma by Jane Austen + read about understanding poetry + read about how to analyze poetry + read poems and marked figurative language identified + wrote a short poem using figurative language describing a scene from a photograph

Spanish 2 - Copied new vocabulary

Bible I - Read Joshua 17-18

World History - Watched lecture videos on what and why on the origins of WWI + started writing an essay describing how Balkan nationalism, entangling alliances, and militarism led to WWI (due Monday)

Biology with Lab - Finished my human impact presentation + presented to dad

PE/Health I - Read an article about resources for teen depression and stress

Foundations - Read the definition of resourcefulness + completed one minute creativity exercise + identified fallacies in stories and arguments

Piano - Practiced for two hours in one hour split sessions

Khan Academy - Completed World History Unit 6: Lesson 1 (parts 6-7) + completed High School Geometry Unit 6: Lesson 4 (parts 1-3) + Unit 6: Lesson 5 (some was assigned)

CLEP - None today

Duolingo - Studied for 15 minutes (Spanish, French, Chinese) + completed daily quests

Reading - Read pages 220-259 of My Dear Henry: A Jekyll & Hyde Remix by Kalynn Bayron and finished the book

Chores - Dusted my bedroom, my bathroom, and the study + laundered my bedding

Activities of the Day:

Personal Bible Study (Matthew 28)

Ballet

Pointe

Journal/Mindfulness

-

What I’m Grateful for Today:

I am grateful to have my friends over again tonight for a sleepover to get ready for our second to last cookie booth tomorrow.

Quote of the Day:

Never underestimate the power of dreams and the influence of the human spirit. We are all the same in this notion: The potential for greatness lives within each of us.

-Wilma Rudolph

🎧Symphony Op. 11 No. 1 in D major (Overture; 'L'amant anonyme') 1. Allegro - Joseph Bologne, Chevalier de Saint-Georges

[zorkaya-moved]

Morning, besties. Ya girl is back from her hiatus 1 day early, but only to update y'all beautiful souls about what's going on.

Did u miss seeing me and Zarina on ur dash (say yes 🔪)? ;)

I had the time to just chill out, concentrate on my real life, and understand that I'll be doing some things differently. I over-hoarded drafts and asks. Every year this happens, and I just never fucking learn, but I'll try to take my time to sort out everything. This means that I'll be looking through my endless list of drafts and finally replying to them (thank u brain for finally working).

I have a queue prepared to start tomorrow until 17-18th for now. It's 3 posts per day, but I'll keep it to 2 posts per day after 18th of March. I'll be absent today as well, even though I came back but it's like... Update-update. Still not going to reach out regarding plots because I'm still not back with those thoughts and ideas.

If YOU have ideas for plotting, through them at me!

It was SOOOOO NICE to take a break from Tumblr and just? Play games? Read books? Just vibe. Also re-connect with some of Zarina's personality traits that I've let to float around. Now, thanks to PTN, I finally understand how to write some of Zarina's apathetic sides and it made me super happy. I'll also post some of the metas I finally sat down to write. I just might continue this type of existence for the whole month of March due to how much I need to do.

I probably will be giving myself like week-long rests without Tumblr on my phone. I'll probably still take a bit of a long time to rest and not really communicate with anyone yet because I still feel like I need a bit more time there. I'm still playing games but I'm also especially busy this month (graduate school registrations, essays, recommendation letters, applying, all of that jazz). 'Cuz of that I'll probably full-on rely on queue. And yes, I wrote things over my hiatus because I just cannot leave my girl alone lmao. Thank u Google Docs for existing.

Hope y'all are safe. I've got things already queued. Today's gonna be a busy work day, and I've got a call with one of the universities before my application to ask some questions, yahoo! Have a fantastic day. Just know that the activity will only be continued through queue for now. I'll also try to limit my ooc posting because I think the amount that I posted made ME overwhelmed as well since I want to have more IC content to interact with people and not make others feel like I forgot or worse. I really was burnt out and I'm sorry if I hurt anyone, made them feel forgotten, or I made them annoyed with my activity/words/ooc posts.

I still struggle with replying to people socially/ooc-ly even in real life, but I'll try to do better. Over the course of my previous job, I was over-stressed but I also... lost touch with many people. And I didn't chase them because, yes, I didn't keep in touch and it was my fault. However, I will do my best to not let this happen again. I cannot promise anything as I still do not have stability in my life (and didn't have for the last, what, 5 years?) and I cannot make any definity promises. I promise to do better, but that's all I can do. And I will do my fucking best.

Oof, thanks you for reading this! Take care of yourselves. I'm gonna try to concentrate on drafts instead of asks these days because that's how active interactions go and I want to interact. Let's fucking go!!

[ofstormsandfire]

hey there pal, hows the weather-

i’ll cut to the chase: how do you get writing done, and how do you stay focused on your writing and not get so distracted?

Weather's pretty decent right now! Sunny and hot, which is why I don't plan on going outside for several hours, but I'll take that over thunderstorms that knock out my power for a few seconds and my wifi for longer. My dad calls it "florida flash and flicker" which is as amusing a name as it is way too accurate.

Anyway, uh. Well, I do get pretty distracted, I won't lie. I'm on here right now instead of writing. But there's a particular site I use called 4thewords that, for lack of a better description, it translates writing words into fighting monsters. With time limits. And while it really isn't a big deal if I "lose" the battle by running out of time, it's a big deal to me and it helps me stay on task.

It's a bit of a tradeoff; I've noticed that while I write significantly more on 4tw I also generally have to edit more after the fact too. But you can't edit what's not there at all.

It's also absolutely not the sort of thing that would work for everyone, but it works really well for me. I started using 4tw after I got a free extra month's subscription (it does cost money, but it's not very much, and if it's not feasible in your budget there is a community pool that you can put yourself into for other users to donate subscriptions to) thanks to beating Camp Nanowrimo in... July of 2021? I have written so much more since I got it and I genuinely cannot recommend it more.

More generally, though: it helps to set deadlines for myself, artificial or otherwise. I'm one of those people who will put off important school assignments until the last minute and then dash out a 10-20 page essay the day before it's due and somehow do okay on it, because adrenaline kicked in.

It also helps that I'm generally very passionate about the things I'm writing? Most of the people I know irl have heard about whatever gay fanfic I'm actively working on the most. I'm meeting up with my nana for lunch tomorrow and she is going to hear about the gay people whether she likes it or not. (She is also going to get this story read out loud to her dramatically because she called me when I was reading it out loud to my dad dramatically and was vaguely curious, and I like reading funny things out loud to people I like dramatically.)

...I think it also helps to focus on One Thing at a time. Which, you have presumably seen my AO3, I'm not good at doing that. But it's much easier to keep your thoughts in order if you mainly work on one longer fic at a time.

It's also much easier to keep your thoughts in order if you write things down. I didn't use to outline my writing, I started cowriting a funky crossover between Warframe and RWBY with a friend who was far more of a planner and who did drag me somewhat kicking and screaming into doing that. Taking notes is important, otherwise you run the risk of forgetting important details like which trainer has which Pokémon or if the gay dumbass you're currently writing has had any sort of revelations about that fact lately. They don't have to be organized (though it helps if they are) and they don't have to make sense to anyone but you, but if you write things down you're much less likely to forget important/cool things you came up with like two separate projects ago.

I hope this makes some sense, anon! If you'd like clarification on anything by all means send another ask, I'll do my best to explain in more depth. Thanks for the ask!

[livvyofthelake]

ok. here is the plan. i am going to go back to my apartment and get my laptop charger. i am going to go to the library on the other side of campus. i am going to sit down there and write my essay. which i feel better about now that my friend helped me with it a little. i am maybe going to watch honor society in a smaller window on my laptop while i type. i am going to eat a fast food meal in my car while watching an episode of american vandal. i am NOT going to read my fanfiction. the fanfiction is the mind killer right now. i have like 12% left i am going to finish it tomorrow when i have more time. i am going to review this stupid footage we shot on saturday. and i am maybe going to watch a movie that could make me act weird but i won’t post about it due to having standards and rules and redacteds. or i might watch a different movie. i’d like to watch a movie. if i finish the essay i’d like a treat :) i have already acquired a fun beverage to bring with me to the library don’t worry… i would also love a little treat but that would require stopping to GET a little treat and i do not want to do that so it’s gonna be a mediocre breakfastish snack instead. don’t worry i ate today i had a sandwich it was delightful i’m fine. i was about to cry the entire time i was making it but i did it and it was lovely. ok let’s go

[kuiperror]

i watched the 2015 film "the danish girl" for my english class and i have to write an essay thats due eod tomorrow SO to get my juices a flowin i'm gonna review the movie here first. spoilers from here on out duh

So this movie was kind of 😐. i knew about lili elbe and gerda wegerner way before this movie , im not like a historian on them but i know that gerda supported lili in her transition and they were still very much together and in love up until the last years of lili's life in 1930 shortly after their marriage was dissolusioned since lilli transitioned and their marriage couldn't be recognized anymore. Also like gerda was a huuuugee woman lover she painted a lot of lesbian erotic art. i was actually really confused most of the film like "ok when is gerda going to start accepting lili and theyre going to be happy with eachother?" but i guess portraying gerda as anything but straight is too much somehow and she needs to rely on a man to help her process the horrible situation of her wife discovering who she is and medically + socially transitioning :(

obviously that was sarcasm , but that does happen in the film. Ok to be real, i will probably finish writing this post, draft a few pages of my essay and rewatch the film again in the morning because im having trouble processing this movie. its earnestly coming off as a nothing burger to me. i was keeping an open mind about how they portray lili's gender awakening and her subsequent female persona as a different person where lili can only be "einar" or "lili" depending on what she is physically presenting as, because this is set in the 1920s and obviously they do not have the same vocabulary and terms for things we do, hindsight is 20/20, that sort of thing. but like. i really expected them to steer away from that way of presenting things, because in the modern-day most (and yes. generalizing but thats how the cookie crumbles in analysis situations) transgender people view their agab self and their "transitioned" self as the same person, because. you really are the same person, you just look differently, a way that is more conjunct with your perception of your gender identity. so i was really expecting lili to start thinking of herself as both "lili" and "einar" or like explain to gerda that she is still the same person she knew, just different, in a way. but no, they keep going on with the "two identities" thing, and while that probably is the way that Real Life lili thought of herself, if the story is going to divert from reality then you can absolutely use fictionilization to your advantage to more clearly explain transgender identities to your cis audience .

one thing i did Not really like was the fact that lili's gender euphoria was always tied with her sexuality. and like. yeah gender ties with sexuality, duh, i would be a fool if i acted like they were seperate, but for lili biggest moments of gender euphoria are portrayed as sensual sexual pleasure. like when a naked gerda pulls off lili's male clothing to reveal a silky camisole underneath or when lili goes to a live peep show and mimics the girl inside, trying to learn to act feminine but stops when the girl sees her (as lili is presenting masculine and doesn't want to raise suspicion) but eventually she loses herself in the pleasure and continues to mimic the girl until she reaches down and remembers she has a penis instead of a vagina and its like... normally i would be cool with this kind of sexual portrayal if this movie was written or directed by a trans person or like 1:1 based off of a trans person's experience but this movie is Obviously made for cis people by cis people. and i would say that a LOT of cishet people, even those who are "allies", think that queer identities are inherently sexual. thats why they say that "children can't be in queer relationships" or that "all trans women / trans people are perverts" because they cant imagine divorcing queerness from sex. and just like the way that the movie refers to lili as having "two identities", this REALLY isnt helping cis audiences understand transppl better.

i think that this movie is helping american society step away from the bare minimum idea that trans ppl (but basically just trans women) are manipulating / abnormal and should only be used in media to point and laugh and say "EWWW the main character had sex with them that's disgusting!!" or "this Trans character is the Villain and they are SOOOO unhinged!" in horror and shit. but it isnt that good at representing like. nuance in gender identity or things like that .

K going to take a break and then continue slaving away at my keyboard

[officialhawks]

I’m supposed to be writing an essay for my class…it’s due tomorrow….but instead I’m procrastinating on here. I can’t help it. For I am Icarus drawn to my Apollo. A moth to a flame.

I cannot refuse even my most basic desires. Oh to be free and wild and strange. To run through fields of grain and wildflowers. To dance in the rain. To love. To cry. To feel.

To feel woes deeper than the body itself. But unrelenting sadness in the soul.

(This essay is seriously putting me in a mood)

ALSO, I prefer sweet/salty or just plain spicy.

If you could redo any one thing in your life what would you change?

Sorry for the rant!

-🐢

I can understand that, I fully admit I procrastinate a lot when comes to writing my reports and filling out paper work.

I wanna fly free! A cage isnt where I belong. And you don’t belong in one either baby bird. ✨

But getting work done is a part of being part of the world. We gotta do it.

You’re brave! I m still trying to get used to spicy foods. Still an amateur and can only handle a little spice like from 1-10 maybe 3-4, or lower haha

If I could re-do any one thing…that’s a real tough question. There will always be things I wish I did differently or handled differently. But at the time I did what I thought was best. Knowing what I know now, it’s really hard to say. Maybe my mom, maybe just staying in better contact with her? But that’s something I can still fix now so I’m not sure that really counts. Sorry I don’t have a good answer.

You are welcome to rant to me when ever you need too.

🪶Hawks

[the-duckless-pond]

Sigh. Its been a rough one, diary. Well, that’s not entirely true. My day started out going really well! Then it all started going sideways about two hours ago and now I’m trapped on the couch in a prison of inability to start tasks. I don’t know what to do. I made my favorite coffee because I told myself I don’t get to sleep until my homework is done. Seriously. I don’t even have that much, it just FEELS like a lot because I am trapped in this prison.

I took a break from writing this to drink my coffee. Here’s what is on the agenda for the evening:

- dinner

- 3 pages Japanese homework and corrections

- 300 words French essay

- shower

It is about 6:30pm. I got home from having lunch with my friend at 3, and have been trapped trying to get started ever since. I guess I could start with dinner. I wanted to make spaghetti but that takes a while and with how late it is and how much I need to do I don’t feel like I have the time anymore. I would have needed to start like an hour ago to feel comfortable. So I guess it’s another microwave meal night. Sigh. Maybe tomorrow. I’ll try again tomorrow (for reference I have been trying to do this all week).

I was going to shower after dinner and then settle in to do my homework, but now I feel like that will make me too relaxed and I need to wake up. So now I’ve got more caffeine that I just grabbed. I guess I will do homework first and then shower.

Truly, even if I only get one thing done this evening, as long as it is my French essay, it will be a success enough. Maybe that should be my goal instead of doing all the things. I’m clearly struggling now so I guess I’ll adjust for my mood and capabilities.

New goals:

- dinner (do NOT order out)

- French essay

- shower

That feels much more doable than switching to another language immediately. I had actually wanted to get this essay done on Tuesday, but I was very focused on actually attending class instead of depression skipping and decided I would wait. Then I got stressed with Japanese homework all week and my depression acting up. Then I tried on Friday but I was very tired from cleaning and everything all day. And so I did nothing. And now here I am, due date 11:59pm tomorrow, struggling to write what feels like a very short essay. Its not even the writing that is hard, it is the getting started. Like all the steps. Maybe if I write them down I can do some of them to get going?

1. get laptop from table and bring to couch

2. turn on laptop

3. open essay doc with prompt

4. write

5. proof read and edit

6. submit

Okay. After writing that list I got up and got my laptop so now it is next to me. I also turned on the light because it is starting to get dimmer in here. Also I put my wax melter tray in the freezer so that I can empty it and use it while I work because that sounds nice. I can take it out in maybe twenty or thirty minutes and it should be good, but I am hoping to have started before then.

My grocery order is about to arrive so once that is all done and put away I will turn on my laptop. I know for a fact that it is fully charged because I did that yesterday morning. So I don’t have to worry about that. After I turn on my laptop I will have a quick dinner. Then I’ll check on my wax melter tray thing, and hopefully it will be ready by then.

Groceries about to be at my door. Opening my laptop and turning it on.

It was already on!! So I opened the doc and now it is ready to go.

Update, groceries delivered and put away. I guess I’ll go try now.

[beatsboy]

7.30.24 / day 37 of romanticizing my life until i love myself again

i think i need to make these things more brief i am getting too contemplative to romanticize lately i fear i think the girl from the youtube video was right, maybe, and when you journal too much, you risk existential crises when i started this, it was honestly supposed to be a bit of a breath from my regular journaling, to not write essays about my thoughts and instead appreciate the beauty in the fire, pay attention to the butterfly and yet it’s impossible for me to to spiral within the delusions of my own thoughts

briefly broke down and cried today because i was so stressed about making rent, which is due on thursday, which i am just short on. alone in my apartment, sweet pea ran up to me and placed his paws on my knees, and when i opened my arms, he jumped up on the chair to my lap and placed his head on my chest. he can be a really good friend sometimes for a dog. tonight, though, at the last minute, i got a session for tomorrow, thank fucking god, so i will be able to pay my rent, my phone bill, and get some real ass groceries

before i got news of the session though, tb sent me money. he did owe me $77, but he sent me $250 in total to help me out, which… i am never the one that needs help, i paid his rent for 6 months when we were living together, which he cited when sending me the money, which i said i would pay back immediately and only if i didn’t get work before rent was due, but regardless it’s hard not to love someone who is still there for you after all this time it’s hard not to miss someone who would do anything for you fuck, i’m ruminating instead of romanticizing again aren’t i

i had coffee with km today, we drove around, he was kind enough to buy my coffee i asked him if he knew anyone with a space ship, and he mentioned the abandoned fry’s and said we could drive past it but when we got there, by some divine miracle, the gate was open (he assured me it was normally shut) so we drove through, and got out of the car. we took pictures and stood in awe of the giant spaceship of this abandoned electronics store i felt what catholics must feel when they see a church after it’s burned down the feeling that nothing is eternal, not even the promise of the future and of course that is what makes the present so precious

using my credit card (which cannot be used for rent, so it’s fine) i bought an eggplant, a bag of chips, some crackers, and pork chops (which came to $30 i love this little fucking expensive life lolll), but finally cooked myself a proper meal today, after only having three hard boiled eggs for breakfast plus the coffee i need to take better care of my body *i want to take better care of my body i just wish it weren’t so fucking expensive to have good food for yourself ! and other forms of wellness ! and yes i got chips when i could have gotten a fruit or something but they were brie flavored and they were only like a dollar so it was just a special add on treat for myself it’s been a hard day and they were delicious and i regret nothing so yeah fuck yeah for brie flavored chips most romantic part of my day tbh

i didn't get as much done as i set out to, but i got into ableton, i used the fucking daw, and i did what i said i would--work on this song every day until it's finished, work on this album every day until it's finished

i am a delusional artist

i am here to create

i am here to finish what i started

because i have the privilege to

because i have the freedom to

because i have shit to say

and it does nothing sitting in a folder on my computer