#i did the same thing w matilda the musical but then i never posted. i might at some point tbh. maybe if i rewatch it tmrw i shall see | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

cutaepatootie · 6 years ago

Text

Now or Never - 03

Pairing: Hoseok | Reader Genre: racer hoseok au / angst Word Count: 8k

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Pt. 01 | Pt. 02 | Pt.03 | Pt. 04 | Pt. 05 | Pt. 06 | Pt. 07 final

The next day you truly feel like shit, but you don’t feel like shit because your legs are sore or because your head hurts. You don’t feel like shit for leaving the party without telling your best friend and you definitely don’t feel like shit because you have to do an essay for next Monday.

No.

You feel like shit because you don’t regret anything you did with Hoseok like you thought you were going to.

Because, for the first time in ages, you wake up with a smile on your lips, remembering events from last night. Remembering how he made you feel, how he grabbed you as if you could slip from his grasp at any moment, how he kissed you, how he touched you, how he fucked you, how he made you feel. And not only physically.

And that terrifies you more than anything.

“I’m screwed,” you grumble as you wake up.

And that is not the only time you grumble that, as you catch yourself thinking about that night and the boy who made you feel like you were on cloud nine more than once during the week.

You are longing to see him again, yearning for that flirtatious banter between the two of you. But it starts raining on Thursday, a storm arriving to the city, and the races are cancelled until the storm goes away, and you don’t see him or hear from him in two weeks.

You didn’t exchange numbers, so it’s logical the boy hasn’t contacted you yet. And the same goes for you, except you wouldn’t contact him even if you had his number, a small voice in your head reminding you that you were just an easy fuck to him. The tension that had been building between the two of you was relieved that night you had sex, and now, he doesn’t want to know anything about you.

But you do want to know about him, and you find yourself going with Lynn to another party at that old, abandoned building in which you saw him all those weeks ago.

You haven’t told Lynn, not because you don’t trust her and you’re afraid she will tell Jackson, but because you’re afraid she will think badly of you, that she will think you’re crazy for having sex – and constantly thinking about having sex again – with your biggest rival.

As you enter the, once again, packed building and climb the stairs towards the last floor, you keep thinking maybe this wasn’t such a good idea. What if he saw you and ignored you? What if he thought you were searching for him and that you were desperate?

Since when do you care about what a guy thinks about you? Where’s the tough looking and independent Y/N?

Taking a deep breath, you let the darkness and the warm air of the room engulf you, the neon lights blinding you from time to time as you search for the bar. You will need alcohol. Lots of alcohol. And despite the fact that you’re dying to know if Hoseok is here tonight or not, you oblige yourself to look ahead and not search around for him.

“I hope we don’t end up surrounded by assholes once again,” you scoff, not only trying to stop Lynn from thinking you’re acting weird tonight and being too quiet, but trying to distract yourself too with normal conversation.

Most of the people think you’re a rather quiet person, but you’re not, and Lynn knows.

“They were actually not that bad.”

You roll your eyes. “All they knew how to do was flirt – which they didn’t do that good, to be honest – and drink.”

Lynn giggles as you two reach the bar. “Maybe you’re right.”

You listen to her as she tells you about a boy she met at the cafeteria last week, and you roll your eyes because, when has she not met a boy at the cafeteria who went to your same university?

“So, he told you he would be here tonight?” you ask her, taking a sip from your beverage.

“Yep,” she nods, her eyes scanning the room as if she was a starving eagle searching for its prey.

“Please, tell me you won’t be leaving me alone like you did last time.”

The silence that follows is the answer you need, and you click your tongue.

“I promise we’ll drop you at your house first.”

You glare at her, finishing up her drink.

“You better do.”

Eventually, the boy appears and Lynn starts speaking with him animatedly while you, on the other hand, are left alone with his creepy friend.

“So, Matilda,” the boy says, and you nearly spit out the liquid you’re about to swallow at the mention of the fake name you gave him. “Tell me, what are you studying?”

“I don’t study,” you lie, your eyes focused on the empty glass in front of you.

You sigh. You’re on your second drink and definitely, not drunk enough to keep a conversation with that creep.

“Oh, I though you did, since you’re at a university party and all that.”

Instead of answering him, you shrug your shoulders and signal the bartender to fill your empty glass. At least, the creep is paying.

“And what do you do for a living?” Mr. Creep, slash Annoying, says.

“I’m a professional killer,” you say, as if it’s nothing.

“W-what?” the boy stutters, and you bit your lower lip to prevent you from cracking up at his scared expression. “A-are you s-serious?”

You grab your glass as the bartender hands it back to you and look at the poor boy.

“Of course I am.” you say, showing your most serious expression. “Matilda, the professional killer. Have you seriously never heard about me?”

“Y-you’re kidding me.”

“You wanna see the knife I use to cut my target’s throats?” you ask, bringing one hand to the hem of your trousers as if you were searching for something.

The boy pales even more as he looks at your hand, hidden under your leather jacket. With a fast movement, you act as if you were retrieving the weapon from under your garments and pointing at the boy.

Mr. Creep lets out a strangled scream as he tries to move away from you, falling from his bar stool in the process.

You crack up hysterically when the light of the neon lights reflects itself on the metallic surface of your house keys.

“Y-you…” the boy stutters.

You keep laughing, ignoring the weird looks from the people around you.

“Matilda the professional killer!” you let out. “You seriously believed that?”

By this point, you are on the verge of tears, your stomach hurting from all the laughing.

“You’re a lunatic!” he shouts as he fights to stand up. “Bitch!”

You can’t help but scoff at his angry words, your laughs never stopping as you watch him leave with the little dignity he still has.

“So much for a little Casanova…” you mumble, taking a sip from your drink as the people around you stop looking at you.

You don’t even feel a presence beside you as you’re too engrossed in your own thoughts to notice.

“Well, at least he could have picked up the bar stool from the floor,” a male voice says, and you’re about to roll your eyes because you can’t seriously stand another creep tonight, when something clicks in your brain and you recognise the voice.

You crane your neck in the speed of light, thankful for not breaking a couple of vertebras in the process, and there he is, looking at you with that smile on his lips. Those innocent-looking lips that can do such sinful things…

Act tough, act tough, act tough.

And so, you take a deep breath, put on an expressionless face and regain your composure.

“Uh, hey” you say, averting your eyes from him once again and looking at your glass.

“Looks like you’re having a great time tonight,” he says, smiling as he sits at the same bar stool he just picked up from the floor.

“I am,” you simply say, wincing a bit because, alright, you want to look tough and unbothered, but you don’t want to sound so rude towards the boy.

“I can see, you handled that boy pretty well.”

“You saw?” you ask, slightly craning your neck so you can look at him.

“I did, Matilda the professional killer. Didn’t know you had so many names,” he laughs.

“Well, some say I’m a box full of surprises,” you smirk. And there it is. That flirty banter, once again.

The boy whispers something, but you can’t hear him over the loud music. When you look at him, his eyes are focused on his hands placed on top of the bar.

“Not much work tonight?” you ask, arching a brow.

He looked at you with a frown on his face.

“I know about your little business,” you say. “It’s impossible not to know, when you sell at every party the people from my university goes to.”

Hoseok narrows his eyes slightly, but lets go of it and just shrugs. “Already sold everything.”

“So, the business is going pretty well…” you tease him, since he looks uncomfortable speaking about the dealing topic.

“You came here by yourself?” he asks.

Somehow, that question leads to Hoseok dragging you towards the bathroom and pushing you against the wall as he locks the door behind him, all lips crashing against each other and erratic breaths in the small room.

“We shouldn’t be doing this again,” you say in between kisses, trying to regain your breath as Hoseok’s lips part from yours and travel south, towards your collarbones.

“Why… Hmm… Why not?” he mumbles.

You lock your fingers through the soft strands of his hair, your heart and mind a complete mess right now. You want, but you can’t. You want to keep seeing Hoseok, but you can’t because, as you do so, you’re betraying your gang, and he’s betraying his.

You pull from his hair, making him look up at you.

“What if they find out?” you sound breathless.

“Why would they find out?”

You push him away from you and move some strands of hair away from your face, sighing.

“It always happens, people always find out.”

“Then,” he whispers, taking a step closer to you until his chest is pressing against yours once again. “We’ll be careful.”

You scoff. “C’mon Hoseok, you know how difficult being careful is in a world like this.”

“So what if they find out?” he asks, his tone sounding angrier. “It’s just sex. I don’t get why that’s such a big deal.”

You click your tongue and take a deep breath, not knowing what to do. As you look in to your eyes, your resolve starts fading like gunpowder in the air.

Seeing your internal conflict, Hoseok stops kissing your neck and roaming your body with his hands and turns serious.

“Tell me you don’t wanna do this and I’ll stop,” is all he says.

Your chests are raising and falling erratically with each breath. Your eyes drift from his dark ones to his soft lips, and then to his eyes once again.

You want him, there’s no doubt about it, but should you be selfish and do what you want instead of what’s the right thing to do for you and your gang?

“Tell me,” he repeats, grabbing your chin and softly making you lift your head so you can look at him.

Is really sex worth the conflict? Because that’s all you want from the boy, right? Just sex.

“I want to do this,” you whisper, and it’s all Hoseok needs to reattach his lips to yours in a fervent kiss.

Those simple five words are the ones who drag you to the situation in which you are today.

After that night in one of the bathrooms of the abandoned building, you keep seeing Hoseok. And, when you think you’ve had enough, that you don’t yearn for him and his touches any more, he appears at your door and proves you wrong, setting you on fire and turning your whole world upside down.

And, somewhere along the way, you find yourself in a confusing whirlwind of emotions and contradictory feelings towards the boy.

You know you have to stop, that behind that though façade you try to put, there is a girl who falls too easily, too quickly, a girl who gives her everything and always ends up with her hands empty. But you can’t stop, because you can never have enough of him, of what he makes you feel.

It is not about the pleasure that comes with the sex anymore. It is about the passionate kisses you share as he is dragging you towards the bed, about the laughs you share as he is trying to take off your Vans but he can’t, about the fireworks that explode inside your chest every time he whispers your name, about the stars you see every time he lays his hands on you. It is about the jump you feel in your chest every time you catch his eyes amongst the crowd. It is about the pang of pain you feel in your chest when you get reminded it is just sex, it should be just sex.

A month passes.

And to you, the thing with Hoseok is not just sex anymore.

You find ways to see each other. He either visits you at your apartment, or the both of you scurry from the parties after the races. The thing is, you always end up, somehow, drowning in each other’s bodies and pleasure. And when the sun is peeking in the horizon, you always watch him leave. You keep telling yourself it is the best for the both of you, but you can’t ignore the lump in your throat, or the cold feeling that lingers in your bed.

“We have to find a way,” Jinyoung grunts, snapping you out of your thoughts. “There has to be a way.”

You look at the boys, swallowing the lump of guilt in your throat as you sit on the bonnet of your car. The white lights of the garage of the Black Panthers make you narrow your eyes as you try to follow the conversation.

“It is too late,” Youngjae speaks. “There are only five races left, and they are nearly thirty points ahead of us.”

“It is difficult, but not impossible,” Yugyeom chimes in.

“Define difficult, silly,” Jaebum scoffs. “There are five races left, thirty points… Y/N would have to win every single race and J Hope would have to finish under fifth position.”

“Difficult, but not impossible,” Yugyeom repeats.

You gulp. In the last four races, you had finished in second place, Hoseok always ahead of you, faster and wittier. You want to think it is because he is an excellent racer, and not because you’re always too distracted with the way he smirks, imagining that same smirk later at night, when he would be fucking you senseless. He still didn’t know that you were the mysterious racer, and still, he had that cocky attitude towards you as you raced. It was driving you insane.

You felt as if you were failing the Black Panthers, your second family, the ones who have trusted you and gave you everything without asking for anything in return. Well, they asked one thing from you, for you to win this racing season, and you were failing at it.

“Alright,” Jackson finally speaks after some minutes of silence, sitting on one of the metallic chairs of the garage. “It is not impossible, guys.”

Jaebum scoffs and Jackson glares at him.

“We have two excellent racers: Jinyoung and Y/N. Y/N is second on the ranking and Jinyoung is fourth. We can still beat them.”

“And what do you suggest we do?” Jinyoung asks. “I know Jungkook’s weakness is his competitiveness and his recklessness, but I can’t rival his speed. His engine is way more powerful that mine, and I can only beat him in short distances.”

“Then, you will have to take advantage of those weak spots,” Jackson says. “Push him to his edge until he becomes reckless and fails.”

“It is difficult, the boy is stubborn… And good,” Jinyoung nods.

“Then, you have to be even more stubborn… And even better,” Jackson says, patting Jinyoung on the back.

Jinyoung nods solemnly. “I’ll do my best.”

“And what about Y/N?” Jaebum asks. “We still don’t know J Hope’s weakness.”

You bite your lower lip. You have spent an entire month sleeping with the boy, seeing him almost every day, and yet, you realize you don’t know anything about him. He looks so cheerful and extrovert that it makes you think you know him, when the truth is, he is as closed off as a brick and the only thing you know about him is his real name.

“Y/N?” you hear Bambam calling your name.

Your head snaps towards him, a small ‘yes’ falling from your lips.

“You’re the biggest rival of J Hope, you must know his ways,” Bambam continues, nodding his head towards you.

You look at Lynn, who is looking at you too, with expecting eyes, just like the rest.

You shrug your shoulders. “I know nothing about him, he’s always changing his tactics and he doesn’t act a certain way, he just adapts himself to the circuit.”

“And you can’t think about some tactic?” Jaebum says.

“Hmm…” you think.

You have won the boy a couple of times, and all those times, he was distracted. His ability to focus on the road and forget about everything around him apart from the road ahead of him, is his strongest point, so, when it is affected, he is affected too.

“His concentration,” you say, feeling another pang of guilt in your chest. This time, it isn’t for betraying your group, it is for betraying Hoseok. “It is his strong point.”

Technically, you aren’t fully betraying him, but it feels like you are.

Jackson nods, looking at you with those serious dark eyes. You can almost hear the gears in his brain turning, working, as he thinks in some plan.

“We can work with that…” Jackson softly says, still deep in thought, his eyes never leaving yours. “For now, we’ll focus on Jungkook.”

The rest of the Black Panthers nod in approval and you all start getting ready for tonight’s race.

“Lynn,” you call out your friend’s name.

She stops talking to Mark, who smiles at you.

“Can I talk to you for a moment?” you ask.

You friend nods and waves goodbye to Mark.

“What do you want?” she asks, a frown on her face as she follows you to your car, the only place where you can trust no one will hear you.

“Get in the car, please.”

“Is everything alright?”

“Yes, just get in the car.”

You hop on the driver’s seat, followed by Lynn.

“Y/N, you’re worrying me,” she whispers.

But your eyes are trained on the rest of the boys, as they start getting in their cars, not paying attention to you or Lynn.

“Is this about your family? Has something happened with your mother?” she asks.

Once the coast is clear, you sigh and run a hand down your face. You have never hidden anything from Lynn, you don’t even know how you’ve been able to keep it a secret from her all this time.

“I’m sleeping with Hoseok.”

“W-what?” she asks, confused.

You look at her, worry in your eyes.

“Who the fuck is that Hoseok chick, and why the fuck does that worry you so much?”

You nearly face-palm yourself right there and then. She doesn’t know his real name.

“Oh, sorry, I meant J Hope. I’m sleeping with J Hope.”

“What?!” she screams, and you’re glad you decided to have this conversation inside your car, when no one is in the garage any more.

You take a deep breath.

“You’re sleeping with J Hope?! As in J Hope, the main racer of the Blue Eagles? The arrogant asshole? The Ghost Eagle?!”

“Yeah, the one and only.”

“O-okay…” she says, blinking rapidly as she straightens on her seat and looks ahead. “This was unexpected, sorry. I don’t know what to say.”

You watch her going from confused, to angry, to confused again.

“Are you fucking crazy?!” she screams, once again going back to being angry. “He is your rival, for fuck’s sake!”

“I know, I know, it’s just – “

“It’s just what?!” she interrupts you. “You know what could happen if Jackson or RM found out?”

You gulp.

“This could be Third fucking World War.”

“Let’s not be overdramatic,” you stutter.

“Overdramatic?!” she keeps screaming, turning towards you and raising her hands in the air. “You’re fucking the main racer of our rival team! Oh my God… If something happens… Fuck, Jackson will kick you out and he will kill J Hope.”

You frown. “Okay, I get why he would kick me out, what I don’t get is why he would kill J Hope.”

She sighs, and it looks like she is trying to calm down herself a bit.

“Something happened between Jackson and RM in the past, and that’s why they hate each other so much,” she says.

You frown. You knew there was bad blood between the two leaders, but not to the point of being capable of killing each other.

“What happened?” you ask.

“It’s not my place to tell you,” she says, voice softer. She looks at you and the anger is gone from her face. “I would, but it really isn’t my place to tell you. Jackson should, and when he is ready, he will. Until then, all you need to know is that the Blue Eagles and the Black Panthers are rivals, and that you shouldn’t be messing around with one of them.”

“I don’t know if I’m just messing around anymore…” you sigh.

“What do you mean?” Lynn asks, her tone raising a bit once again.

You cover your face with your hands, sighing.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, I was scared and unsure.”

Lynn lets out a long exhale of air and rests her hand on your shoulder.

“Don’t worry, I’m glad you told me in the end.”

A long silence follows Lynn’s words, and she is the one to end up breaking that silence.

“Tell me about it, how did it start?”

You grunt, your face still hidden behind your hands. Eventually, you move them away and place them on top of the steering wheel.

“We ran into each other at that university party we went two months ago, when we met that silly boy who asked us if we were cousins.”

“Mhm… I remember that asshole,” she jokes.

“Well, Hoseok came to me and we started some sort of… Banter. I don’t even know how to call it! He was flirting with me, but I wasn’t, until I was flirting too and… One day he drove me home and I invited him to my apartment.”

Lynn face-palms herself and you sigh.

“You invited him to your apartment?”

“Yeah… I thought what was between us was just sexual tension and, if I invited him to my apartment and slept with him, it would be over.”

“But it wasn’t.”

“Nope. We kept seeing each other until… Today.”

“Ugh… This is bad, this is so wrong,” she whispers. “He knows you’re a Black Panther, right?”

“Yeah.”

“I don’t get why he’s sleeping with you, then. He knows what will happen to him if RM or Jackson finds out,” Lynn says, more to herself than for you to hear.

“Is it that bad?” you ask, hoping it isn’t.

“Have you fallen for the boy?” Lynn asks as an answer to your previous question, rendering you speechless.

It is your lack of response which makes Lynn snap.

“Y/N!”

“I haven’t fallen for him!” you quickly defend yourself. “I just like him… A bit too much.”

“Ugh… This is soooo wrong!”

You want to cry. How could you let something like this happen to you? You’re here, disappointing your best friend and yourself, when Hoseok probably is relaxing before the race, not even thinking about you, or about the mess you’re in.

“What can I do?”

“You have to stop seeing him,” she says.

Your eyes widen. It is the only option, you know it. The best for you and the best for the Black Panthers. But it is not the option you want.

“I…” you stutter.

“Look, Y/N,” Lynn says, turning serious as she grabs your wrists and looks you in the eye.

You feel like that sixteen girl who ran away from home all over again. You feel small and unprotected, and for once in your life, you don’t have your next move planned. You’re used to timetables, to having everything planned and under control. You’re not used to this, to having to rustle up, to having to make decisions in a haste. You don’t want to feel like this small, fragile girl, you want to feel powerful, sure of yourself, you want to feel like the woman you have been building all these years.

“You’re my best friend, I’ve known you ever since you were seventeen and I’ve watched you grow and become a woman by my side and I love you like a sister. I only want what’s best for you, and that Hossok boy isn’t – ”

“Hoseok,” you correct her, giggling.

“Hoseok, J Hope, whatever the hell his name is. You have to stop seeing him.”

“I know,” you sigh, feeling as if you’re starting to regain control once again as you move her hands away from you.

“I know he seems a nice guy and all that, but he isn’t. None of them are. Not even the Black Panthers.”

You gulp, and she keeps talking.

“When I got you into this… world, I knew it was dangerous, but you are strong, and I knew you would put up with it,” she pauses. “The races, the competitions, the parties… It all seems funny and harmless, but it isn’t. Behind all those gangs, there is a story, there is some sort of business.”

You remain silent, looking at the steering wheel as Lynn looks out of the window.

“I first heard about the races when I was in high school. I met this boy, Christian. Handsome, hot, funny, cocky… Everything a girl my age wanted. He made me feel some sort of way… And I ended up falling for him. He dragged me to this world, to his world. At first, it all seemed fun and games, until I found out what his ‘group’ did behind their racers façade. They dealt with weapons. Most of them were hiding from the cops, numerous charges behind their names, and Christian was one of them.”

You look at her, because she has never told you this story.

“One day, we were just drinking and having fun in some park, the rest of his group was there too. I still remember the date, the weather… Even the clothes he was wearing…” she pauses again. “He was too young.”

Her voice sounds bitter, and you see in her features that she really loved the boy.

“Some guys appeared all of the sudden. The started shouting things and pointing at us with their guns. Christian hid me in between some bushes, telling me to keep quiet and run away. But I didn’t, I stayed.”

You place your hand on top of hers, comforting her.

“Turns out, some business had gone wrong. Their clients weren’t satisfied, and they wanted an explanation. The boys refused the new offer and the others killed them. Not even one of them survived, some of their girlfriends lying on the floor next to them.”

A shiver runs down your spine.

“Christian hadn’t told me anything, about the other gang, the weapons, the business… Nothing. I loved him, and I thought he loved me back, but he didn’t. I was just his toy, his distraction… That’s all those boys are looking for, they can’t keep someone by their sides because of their lifestyle, and when they do, it always ends badly.”

“And how is it that you still belong to this world?” you ask.

“Because I met Jackson, and he offered me a way out, a way of earning easy money… And that’s how I ended up being a racer of the Black Panthers.”

“You only told me about Jackson, but never about Christian.”

“I try not to think too much about him, he only brought me pain.”

You nod.

“That’s why you have to keep yourself away from Hoseok, Y/N. Not only for the Black panthers, but for you. He is not good for you, you think he is, but he really isn’t.”

You gulp, because you know.

“And what about Jackson and the rest of the boys? Are they better than the rest or something?”

“No, they’re the same, they just hide their business from us to keep us safe.”

You silently nod, fiddling with the car keys in your hands.

“Fuck,” you giggle, trying to escape from the awkward situation and your conflicted thoughts. “I always knew you were a softie deep inside.”

“Hey,” Lynn says, snapping your hands away from her as you start the engine of the car. “Don’t make me prove you wrong.”

. . .

You try to avoid Hoseok even if you’re protected by the thick, dark visor of your helmet.

You are almost trembling as you climb on the driver’s seat of your black Mitsubishi, stopping you from looking to the silver Porsche parked on your left every now and then.

You can hear his laugh above the noise, feel his presence even if there are metres and the thick material of your cars between your bodies. It is as if you are the moth and he is the flame, forever catching your attention, forever dragging you towards him, until you touch him, and you get burnt.

“Get on your cars please! The race is about to start!” someone says through the speakers.

You close the door of your car after waving at Jinyoung, whose car is parked behind yours. Unconsciously, you look towards the silver car out of the corner of your eye, catching Hoseok looking at you as he adjusts his seatbelt. He must sense your eyes on him, because he suddenly looks at you and a frown appears on his face.

You avert your eyes from him and get everything ready.

Seatbelt. On.

Windows. Down.

Feet. On the pedals.

Hand. On the gearbox.

From the outside, it looks like you’re ready, but on the inside… You’re far from that.

You’re barely containing your nerves, your hands trembling despite the tight hold you’re keeping on the steering wheel. Your head, far from being focused on the upcoming race, is focused on other things. Things that have nothing to do with the race.

Although they have a lot to do with the boy sitting on the car on your left.

You can’t stop thinking about Lynn’s words and the story she told you. You knew what you were getting into when you first met the Black Panthers.

Races are illegal, and most of the people that take part in them have done things way worse than racing in some abandoned industrial area.

But you wanted to earn money, easy and quick, and it was your best option. Without doubting, you joined the Black Panthers.

Two years later, here you are, racing against the best racers. Trying to be and act as someone you really aren’t.

When the count reaches one, you step on the gas pedal and your engine comes to live, roaring with force.

Your mind isn’t in the race, because your heart is somewhere else, and Hoseok wins without having to sweat a single droplet.

But, if you thought the most difficult part was trying to focus on the race, you were wrong.

The most difficult part of your plan is going to be avoiding the glares Hoseok is sending your way, and he is glaring at you because you’re avoiding him like the plague.

Usually, by this point, you would be stealing glances at each other, getting the other worked up until one of you couldn’t take it any more and stood up, the other following a while after. You would be getting shy at his dark eyes, traveling through your body lustily. He would be breathing erratically, observing how, each time you took a sip from your cup of vodka, you would look at him and run your tongue across your lips. You would be fighting silently, lust, desire, taunting as your weapons.

But tonight, you’re not following his game.

You’re sitting on the couch, the untouched cup of vodka still full. By your side, Lynn is speaking animatedly with some girls, Mark observing them just as silently as you are.

You can feel your skin burning every time his eyes land on you. You can feel your cheeks heating up every time you feel the anger of his dark orbs. You can feel yourself tensing each time you feel your phone buzzing in the pocket of your jeans.

Gathering a bit of courage, you look at him.

He is sitting, just like you, surrounded by people who are chatting animatedly. And just like you, he is avoiding them.

His eyes are on the screen of his phone, and his fingers are typing something on it. Just then, you feel your phone buzzing again and he lifts his eyes from the phone to see if, this time, you will answer his texts.

But when his eyes find yours are already on him, the anger only grows and you avert your eyes quickly.

You have never seen him this angry before, not even that first time when you beat him unfairly. And despite your efforts of ignoring it, you can feel how it is making you feel hot and bothered.

“I’m gonna go to the bathroom,” you say to Lynn, who nods, not even hearing what you just said.

Placing your cup on the table, you stand up from your booth and walk towards the bathroom.

You know it is a bad idea, since Hoseok will take it the wrong way and think you want him to follow you.

You don’t even look his way one last time before you disappear in the crowd.

The music sounds distant once you lock yourself in the bathroom, taking a deep breath, but deciding it was a bad idea when you smell the acid scent in the air.

Forgetting about the environment you’re in, you take your phone from the back pocket of your mom jeans and unlock it.

22:50 PM [from: Hoseok] – where are u?

22:50 PM [from: Hoseok] – i can see the rest of your group, but not you

Is what you received at the beginning of the night. You stayed a bit longer at the garage to speak with your sister while the rest went straight to the party.

23:44 PM [from: Hoseok] – fuck, u look so pretty tonight

23:45 PM [from: Hoseok] – can’t wait until we’re both alone

23:45 PM [from: Hoseok] – to have you moaning underneath me

23:46 PM [from: Hoseok] – begging like the good girl u are

You bite your lower lip as you read those messages.

23:58 PM [from: Hoseok] – Y/N?

23:58 PM [from: Hoseok] – is something wrong?

23:58 PM [from: Hoseok] – i can see you avoiding me

23:59 PM [from: Hoseok] – did something happen?

00:05 AM [from: Hoseok] – can you at least answer me?

00:16 AM [from: Hoseok] – ok

00:16 AM [from: Hoseok] – i see u don’t wanna talk to me

00:17 AM [from: Hoseok] – have fun

The last message was sent just five minutes ago, when you stood up from your booth and went to the bathroom.

Walking closer to the sink, you splash some water on your face, trying to avoid your eyes because you don’t want to ruin the mascara and look like a panda. You’re just closing the faucet when you hear some knocks on the door.

“Occupied!” you say.

“It’s me,” a male voice says from the other side of the voice, and you stop dead on your tracks because you recognise the voice.

Not knowing what to do, you remain silent.

Another knock.

“Y/N, I know you’re in there,” Hoseok says, raising his voice a bit. “Open the door.”

You hide your hands in the pockets of your jeans, afraid that, if you let them free, they will act on their own and unlock the door.

“Y/N, this little game you’re playing is starting to piss me off!”

You bite your lower lip and stay still. Eventually, he will give up and you will be able to get out of the bathroom.

“If this is one of your little games to get me horny, you’ve won. Now open the door.”

You place your hands on top of your mouth to prevent you from saying anything.

“Y/N,” he really sounds angry. He knocks again on the door, and you can see the handle shaking as he agitates it violently. “Y/N! I’m being sincere when I say I’m starting to get pissed off.”

“Hoseok, go away,” you finally mutter, hoping he has heard you.

“Y/N,” he repeats, and this time his voice sounds closer, as if he’s resting his head on the door. “You got me all hot and bothered, now open the door so I can play your game too.”

“I’m not gonna open the door.”

All you hear is the silence of the bathroom and the muffled music outside the door. Hoseok remains quiet for a while, and then, the knocks start again. Now, he is truly pissed off.

“Y/N,” he growls.

“This isn’t a game, Hoseok, I don’t wanna see you tonight. Just go away.”

“Why? Did I do something? Baby, let me in and we can’t talk about it.”

That would probably be the most mature idea, but let’s be honest, in this kind of situations you’re not the best at acting mature.

“There’s nothing to talk about. I don’t wanna see you.”

“Fuck, Y/N,” he growls, banging once on the door. “At least give me an explanation.”

“What explanation does ‘I don’t wanna see you tonight’ need?!” you say, raising your voice.

“So, you’re telling me you just don’t wanna spend the night with me? Like that? Out of nowhere?”

“Is it that hard to get?!”

“Well, yeah, it is! It is when just yesterday you were letting me fuck you on your damn bed!”

You run towards the door and knock on it repeatedly. “Shut up! Don’t say that in here!”

“I would say it somewhere else, but you don’t want to open the fucking door!” he shouts, kicking the door with what you suppose is his feet.

“Gosh, if you’re horny just find another girl to fuck!” you shout, not even knowing what’s leaving your mouth any more.

“Maybe I should!”

“Maybe you should!”

Another blow reaches the door and then, it stops. The shouts, the knocks, everything, and you’re left in the middle of the bathroom, with erratic breaths and a numbing silence. You feel your heart clenching at the idea of Hoseok fucking another girl, of Hoseok replacing you. But maybe, that’s what he should do, what’s best for the both of you.

After all, it looks like he didn’t care about you that much.

Hesitant, you unlock the door of the bathroom and stick your head out of the space left between the ajar door and the doorframe.

You don’t know if it’s disappointment or relief what you feel when you find an empty corridor.

Sighing, you walk out of the bathroom and head towards the dace floor, which you have to cross to climb up the stairs that will lead you to your booth.

Out of the corner you make out a dark figure leaning against the bar top. You click your tongue and fasten your pace.

A harsh grip on your wrist stops you in the middle of the dance floor.

“You thought I was going to let this slip?” you hear Hoseok whisper in your ear, his teeth clenched with force.

“Hoseok, not in here,” you mutter, looking around you.

It looks like no one is paying attention to you two, too engrossed in dancing, in letting their bodies follow the rhythm of the music.

“Then, where?”

You crane your neck so you can look at him, and fuck, does he look pissed.

You try to break free from his grip, but only to find his fingers enclosing tighter around your wrist.

“Just…” you look around you once again. “Follow me.”

You sigh in defeat, because you know he isn’t going to stop until he gets what he wants. You’re willing give in if that means not being seen together in the middle of the dance floor.

He lets go of your wrist before sending you a sever glance and then, you start crossing the industrial unit until you reach the front door and you walk outside. You wait for Hoseok at a nearby industrial unit, your arms crossing across your chest as you battle against the cold air of the night.

“Here,” he says, appearing in front of you and taking off his bomber jacket to place it around your shoulders.

You take it off and hand it back to him. He frowns, but doesn’t press you any further.

Instead, he takes it angrily and shoves it under his arm.

“Care to explain why you’re acting like this all of the sudden?” he says, now his tone sounding more tired than angry.

“This,” you say, pointing at you and then at his chest. “Has to stop.”

He frowns. “What?”

“Whatever it is that we have, it has to stop.”

He scoffs. “Last night you weren’t telling me to stop.”

You fulminate him with the glare you send his way.

“I don’t get this drastic change of opinion.”

“I haven’t changed my mind, I’ve just finally realised how things work.”

He scoffs again. “Oh, please, enlighten me then, how do things work?”

You look at him, he has crossed his arms over his chest too, and he’s starting to close off.

“You tell me, you’re the one who has been a part of this world way longer than me.”

He glares at you, and when he’s about to speak, you open your mouth once again.

“For fuck’s sake Hoseok, you’re a Blue Eagle and I’m a Black Panther. We’re enemies, rivals, we can’t keep seeing each other.”

“We were rivals a month ago when we started fucking, and you seemed to be okay with it.”

“Seriously Hoseok?” you say. “I told you how wrong it was.”

“Yeah, but then I asked you if you wanted to keep seeing me and you answered yes. If I remember correctly no one was aiming at you with a gun, making you answer that. You answered that because you wanted.”

“Because I was being selfish and reckless, and I wasn’t thinking about the consequences.”

“And now, you’re just being overly dramatic.”

“Maybe, but I prefer being dramatic than being dead.”

“See? Dramatic,” he says, rolling his eyes, and now, you’re the one who is annoyed.

“If Jackson finds out what we’re doing, he will kill us.”

Hoseok remains quiet, lips sealed. Because he knows. He knows it is true.

You press your hands on his chest, pushing him away from you.

“You know it, and you don’t care?!” you say through gritted teeth.

“What are the possibilities of them finding out? C’mon Y/N, who cares if we fuck or not? You’re just another Black Panther, no one knows you. You’re just another girl in this industry. Who will care about you fucking me?”

His words feel like a harsh slap against your cheek, and you can see how Hoseok regrets letting them slip from his lips.

You bite your tongue to not say who you really are, the other Black Panther no one knows, just another girl in this industry, the one who is biting his ass at every race, his biggest rival.

“Y/N…” he murmurs.

“You definitely don’t, but I did, I did care about me fucking you, and Jackson and RM would have cared too.”

“You know I didn’t mean it like that.”

“It is over. Whatever the hell we had, it’s over now.”

“Y/N,” he calls your name once more as you start walking past him.

“It was just sex, there’s nothing to worry about, we’ll replace each other easily.”

You show him a bitter smile and, when he tries to reach you, you turn around to face him.

“Stop. Do us a favour and don’t reach out to me any more, huh?”

“Fine, you don’t want me to reach out to you? I won’t. This is over.”

After his last words, he purses his lips and stays still on the spot. He lets you go.

And you go, without looking back once, nodding as you repeat to yourself that whatever it was – just sex – is over now, and that it is the best decision you could have made.

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milliebobbybrownfan · 6 years ago

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New Post has been published on Millie Bobby Brown Fan #MillieBobbyBrown #StrangerThings

New Post has been published on http://millie-bobby-brown.com/824-2/

Press/Photos: Millie for W Magazine

Nearly two years ago, at the British Academy of Film and Television Arts tea in Los Angeles, Millie Bobby Brown, who was then only 12, was the sensation of the party. Stranger Things, a clever, supernatural homage to 1980s pop culture, had just become a hit, and her character, Eleven, an otherworldly, possibly alien, androgynous girl with telekinetic abilities and a diabolical stare, was the breakout star of the show. Unlike the misfit Eleven, Brown, who was born in Marbella, Spain, and grew up in Dorset, England, is bubbly, charming, and has a gift for socializing. On the day of the BAFTA event (and at most other ceremonies during the hectic awards season), she was leading her teenage male costars in a kind of nonstop Millie Bobby Brown parade. The four boys, who were dressed in formal clothing that they constantly seemed to be squirming out of, were content to joke among themselves or hover around the buffet, but Brown had other plans. Again and again, suddenly and swiftly, she would round them up and march her posse over to, say, Ryan Gosling, Emma Stone, or Justin Timberlake. Cheerfully, forcefully, Brown, who was wearing an age-appropriate party dress and strappy sandals, would extend her hand and say, “Hi! I’m Millie Bobby Brown. So glad to meet you!”

She was on a quest to meet her biggest crush, Leonardo DiCaprio, but he wasn’t there that day. Luckily, nearly every celebrity she did meet was a huge fan of Stranger Things and, especially, Eleven. But even if they had no idea who she was, Brown was unfazed: The future was, simply, hers for the taking.

According to her father, Robert Brown, Millie, who is the second youngest of four children (three girls and one boy), popped out of the womb in a confident state. “She’s always been a personality,” he told me during the shoot for this story. Brown, who is now 14, started auditioning for commercials, movies, and musicals like Matilda and Annie when she was 8. Her first job was a commercial for Publix, the supermarket chain. In the audition, she had to hold up some cupcakes and say, “Mom, can I have these?” Afterward, the casting director remarked to her father, “Your daughter is something quite unique.”

“When I got that first job, I knew right away that I was born to do this,” Brown recalled. She is now taller than when Stranger Things debuted, but she still looks the same: curious, hyper-alert, and appealingly wide-eyed. She was wearing fitted jeans and a pink sweater, but was barefoot. “Where are my sneakers?” she asked no one in particular. The entire Brown family has left England and resettled in Atlanta, where Stranger Things is filmed. Brown had just started shooting the third season, after Netflix signed her to a deal for a reported $3 million.

Like every teenager, Brown is umbilically linked to her phone. She has almost 17 million Instagram followers, who closely monitor her every post. When she met Drake in Australia last November, where both of them were on tour (she was promoting the series; he was performing), the musician draped an arm around her shoulder for a picture that went viral. “He invited me to his concert,” Brown explained matter-of-factly. “And now we talk all the time. I ask his advice.” Perhaps he has advised her to use her celebrity to draw attention to certain issues. When she won favorite TV actress at the Kids’ Choice Awards in March, Brown wore a denim shirt with the names of the victims of the Parkland, Florida, school shooting embroidered on the back. “I take my responsibilities seriously,” Brown told me. “I recognize that I have a voice, and I want to use it wisely.”

In 2015, when she auditioned for Stranger Things, Brown had no idea that it would become her launching pad. “I didn’t know anything about it,” she explained. “Every part of the show was top secret. I Skyped with the directors [brothers Matt and Ross Duffer], and we spoke about ’80s movies—E.T., Stand by Me, and Poltergeist. I flew to L.A. for a screen test, and the next day I got the job! I was 11. We did the show, and I went back home to England. I thought, Okay, it’s a little show. What’s next? And then we came to America for the premiere. Three days later, my whole life changed. People went crazy! My followers went up to 1 million in one day. Magazines wanted me. One of my goals was to be on the cover of W, and you see? Dreams do come true.”

After the first season of Stranger Things, Brown signed a contract with Calvin Klein and was nominated for an Emmy and a SAG award, while the show won a nod for a Golden Globe. (Last week she was nominated for a second Emmy.) Time magazine chose her for its Time 100, making her the youngest recipient to garner that honor. “I don’t think I’ve changed,” she said. “I’m not thinking, Oh, I know everything now. I still get nervous. I still get anxious.” That response surprised me: Brown has always seemed so confident. Was this sudden self-doubt part of becoming a teenager? “Maybe,” she allowed. “But I still love parties! Although, even back then at the BAFTA tea, when I met Justin Timberlake, I swear I could have fainted.” She smiled. “Ask me some questions,” she said, deftly changing the subject.

Lynn Hirschberg: Who is your girl crush? Millie Bobby Brown: Paris Jackson. She’s got great style. She’s like a sister to me. And she plays the piano!

Hirschberg: What was the first album you bought with your own money? Brown: Amy Winehouse. I was 6. I knew every single word to “Valerie.” My dad wouldn’t let me hear “Rehab”! There were definitely rules. Amy Winehouse was my go-to, but back then I sang “We Found Love,” by Rihanna, in the mornings. It got me going when I had to go to school.

Hirschberg: What’s your favorite Halloween costume? Brown: I’ve never been very good at Halloween. I play characters all the time, so what’s the point of dressing up as another character? The last couple of Halloweens, I saw a lot of people dressed as Eleven. Sometimes it’s comforting. But it’s also very interesting to see a 40-year-old man wearing the look of my 12-year-old character.

Hirschberg: As a child, what was your favorite toy? Brown: A microphone that had High School Musical on it. I could sing with Zac Efron! I watched High School Musical every single day. When I met Zac Efron, I could barely speak.

Hirschberg: What is the first e-mail you remember sending? Brown: I always wanted to be on Ellen, and that was the first e-mail I sent: to Ellen DeGeneres. I explained my life story and how I needed to be on her show. I never got a response. Five years later, I was on Ellen! She found that e-mail and showed it to the audience. Very embarrassing. I had made lots of grammatical mistakes.

Hirschberg: In Godzilla: King of the Monsters, your first film, which will be out next spring, you play a girl named Madison. Was it hard to act opposite a monster that wasn’t there? Brown: Godzilla was a tennis ball! I was always looking up. My neck hurt a lot, and I had to get dry needling. They stuck a really big, but thin, needle in my neck. Your muscle then spasms, and, eventually, you’re fine. After the dry needling, I had a great rapport with the tennis ball.

Hirschberg: Now that you live here, what do you like best about America? Brown: I love red Jolly Rancher candy. Cherry. They’re very sour. I’m not allowed to eat them anymore, because they color my tongue. Eleven is odd enough without having a red tongue.

As she stuck out her tongue to show its clean non-redness, Brown had to stop talking: It was time for hair and makeup. Without knowing her affinity for Amy Winehouse, the stylist decided that Brown’s hair should be teased into a version of the messy, high bouffant that was the singer’s trademark. Brown was thrilled. Her father, who was sitting nearby with her older brother watching Liverpool, their soccer club, defeat Roma, was smiling at his daughter’s reflection in the mirror. “You know,” he said, “Millie is all confidence and swagger in the world, but at night, at home, she can turn into a little, shy girl. It’s a side of her that only her family sees.”

As the makeup artist added a cat-eye tilt to her round eyes, Brown stared at the transformation in the mirror. I asked her if she ever felt like a typical restless teenager—did she ever want to go crazy, be rebellious, run away? “I can be rebellious,” Brown replied, carefully choosing her words. “But not so much. I’ve never been grounded by my parents. I’m a very good girl.” She paused. “But I do believe in making noise, in being loud.”

To play Eleven, Brown had to cut off her long hair and shave her head, which is something that would be traumatic for any 11-year-old. Her baldness instantly set her apart from, well, everybody. “The shaved head was a big deal,” Brown admitted. “On the one hand, it was cool. When you’re bald, rain feels like a head massage. I’d walk in the rain, and people would look at me like I was crazy. I’d be smiling—so, so happy to have the water hit my naked head. But on the other hand, people stared at me, wondering whether I was sick. Some would even laugh at me, without knowing whether I was or wasn’t sick. It was hurtful, but their attitude taught me something about compassion. In the end, being bald was the best thing I ever did—being different changed my life. I wanted to embrace my baldness and, hopefully, inspire people. And, now, that’s become my message to the world.” – Source

2018: W Magazine

#Photo Sessions #Photos #Press #Scans

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wiremagazine · 8 years ago

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THE MAGIC OF MATILDA

It's one of the most lauded theatrical shows in recent years, prompting the New York Post to declare, "Once in a blue moon, a show comes out blazing and restores your faith in Broadway." It's Roald Dahl's Matilda The Musical and it is headed to the Broward Center for the Performing Arts April 25 for a limited two week run through May 7, 2017.

Winner of over 70 international awards including four Tony Awards and a record-breaking seven Olivier Awards, including Best Musical, Matilda The Musical is based on the beloved novel by best-selling author Roald Dahl (Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Fantastic Mr. Fox). It is the story of an extraordinary girl who dreams of a better life. Armed with a vivid imagination and a sharp mind, Matilda dares to take a stand and change her destiny.

The three girls sharing the title role are Gabby Gutierrez, Jaime MacLean and Jenna Weir. The principal cast also features (alphabetically): Jennifer Bowles (Miss Honey), Dan Chameroy (Miss Trunchbull), Keisha T. Fraser (Mrs. Phelps), Matt Harrington (Mr. Wormwood) and Darcy Stewart (Mrs. Wormwood). Matilda The Musical is directed by Tony Award winner Matthew Warchus (God of Carnage), who helms this production with a book by Tony Award-winning playwright Dennis Kelly and music and lyrics by Australian comedian, musician and composer Tim Minchin.

Tickets are available at the Broward Center AutoNation Box Office, 201 SW Fifth Avenue, Fort Lauderdale, www.browardcenter.org or by calling 954.462.0222.

Wire Magazine sat down with Ensemble performer Stephen Diaz to discuss the acclaimed production in advance of its opening.

Michael W. Sasser: Briefly describe Matilda The Musical for Wire Magazine readers. Stephen Diaz: Matilda The Musical is the musical adaptation of the Roald Dahl story that borrows its title from the name Matilda Wormwood, the story’s clever and highly intelligent 5-year-old protagonist. Matilda uses her brainpower and antics to triumph over stupidity and oppressive adults. This little girl is a freethinking individual who doesn't accept the status quo and who inspires others to action by being the author of her own life.

MWS: Tell our readers why they should go see Matilda The Musical. SD: Matilda the Musical is like one big, extremely colorful, story-driven drag show. The world of the show lives in a heightened reality. The intention of such exaggeration is to reveal and validate life as it really is. Exaggeration allows the show to make fun of what exists in order to allow the audience easier access into the cockamamie nature of reality, which at its core is ultimately playful.

MWS: What should audiences expect from the show? SD: Audiences can expect a feast for all the senses. In addition to an award-winning lighting design, multiple elements pop-out as they envelope you in a world that is vividly alive as perceived through the eyes of a child. This show will make your seat tremble with its sound design and will energize you with its music. It is both satirical and emotional and will serve you so much ridiculousness you will leave inspired to be a little bit naughty.

MWS: What would surprise readers to know about Matilda The Musical? SD: Speaking of drag, the show actually does involve a real drag character, played by a man whose performance alone is worth the price of admission. Miss Trunchbull, the Headmistress (also the Olympic hammer throwing champion of 1969) is played by the man Dan Chameroy. The Trunchbull is an unforgiving and shady dictator whose bosom is large enough to feed the entire student-body a serving of wit and realism. You will be schooled by this Headmistress… so take notes.

MWS: What is your history with this show? SD: I was considered for the Broadway production over a period of two years, starting in 2013. I was never cast. Fast forward to late 2015, I was hired as a replacement in the U.S. Tour of Matilda as a member of the adult ensemble. After eight months of touring, the show moved to Toronto for the Canadian premier, and had a six-month engagement run, where I played the featured role of Rudolpho. Beginning in January of 2017, the U.S. Tour resumed and here we are four months into the run.

MWS: What is the most challenging thing about your role? SD: The most challenging thing about my role is having to go from 0% to 110% in a snap. Imagine having five energy drinks intravenously injected into your system and you will know even that is too slow for the demands of the role.

MWS: What do you see as the theme of Matilda The Musical? How do you relate to that theme? SD: Discovering one’s sense of belonging is a theme I see throughout Matilda. The proscenium of the theater is strewn with scrabble blocks for the reason that a scrabble piece has the same value to a child as it does for an adult. It is here we leave behind the adult world of labels and enter a shared world that simply is, in all of its absurdity. Leaving behind our labels connects us to a joy that is not dependent on our preconceived concepts but is founded upon the very nature of belonging and existence – we exist, how strange and miraculous that is. Each character, no matter how intelligent or dimwitted, feels this desire to belong. The schoolteacher Miss Honey settles for finding her place in the world by living in a shack under the employment of Miss Trunchbull. Matilda finds her peace in the solitude of her own being. Mr. and Mrs. Wormwood find their identity in each other’s gaudiness. Even Miss Trunchbull has hammered out a life for herself. Each has their own depth of understanding of what it means to occupy the world, but ultimately each seeks to realize and affirm that they belong, each the protagonist of his/her own story, and each a player in the larger show we, the audience, witness as Matilda The Musical. It is not a love story per se, but it is about a universal love, about belonging – the way a child understands it. All-inclusive.

MWS: What do you enjoy the most about this show? SD: I enjoy the use of children in this show. Kids are naive and innocent in that they are unfettered by information. As the original director Matthew Warchus intended, he utilizes “the golden emotion that you get for free with child actors”; and they provide this gold both on and offstage. The world is not a competition for them, it’s just fun. And they work just as much, if not more, than the rest of the adult cast – so what’s my excuse?!

MWS: When did you recognize your passion for performing? SD: I’ve enjoyed performing since I was a child. Whether it was playing piano, singing or dancing. When I had the opportunity to see or participate in a show, I would often go through a sort of withdrawal-from-the-show for days following the performance. Perhaps these were clues to my passion for performing. As an adult, I’ve come to understand that my interest for the voice, for movement and for understanding human behavior is me. The more I flesh out who it is that I am, the more my passion for performance illuminates.

MWS: Do you remember a moment when you truly knew you loved it? SD: After trying to give up the business altogether, I came to the realization that any job is a job. The utilization of my abilities in the performing arts business, my investigation into the voice, into movement and into the nature of human behavior, provides me a sense of fulfillment and satisfies my interests and my design to its fullest capacity. The medium of performance is irrelevant (though necessary to survive in the world), but my love for these creative fields stands outside of any job market.

MWS: For those who aspire to doing what you do, what's the biggest difference between how you imagined it and its reality? SD: It is work. The seamless unity that an audience sees is an illusion; a production where all the pieces fit together and each role is clearly defined. The reality is a business, and it is messy and dichotomous. Eight times a week we do what we do and everything is regimented, from what we say, to how we move, to when we breathe – life becomes this way backstage, and you must strive, both on and offstage, to retain your humanity and simply to be present... while keeping eyes out for the next gig. The business is work, there is no guarantee for it, and often times the job doesn't go to the most capable of individuals. Your job is to love the work by saying an unconditional “yes” to it (despite your opinions), and at the same time not be the victim of your own life.

MWS: Tell our readers about your career to date? SD: Well, I grew up in a small town... just kidding. Some professional highlights have included performing as Aladdin at the Hyperion Theatre in Disneyland for three years. After which, I was hired as a Featured Shark in the Broadway Revival of West Side Story. I joined a couple professional dance companies for the next following years, and was then hired at Radio City for their Christmas Spectacular. I played Paul in A Chorus Line at the 5th Avenue Theatre in Seattle, which was fun. I was a go-go dancer in a TV movie of the week. Let’s see – oh yeah – commercials, I almost got to squeeze a roll of toilet paper... I was a dancing Band-Aid.

MWS: Is there anything else you would like to share with our readers? SD: I like this quote from Tim Minchin’s beat-poem “Storm,” (Minchin wrote the music and lyrics for Matilda). I think it speaks to the inherent pleasure and affirmation of life that seeing Matilda provides – Isn’t this enough? Just this world? Isn’t this enough? Just this beautiful, complex Wonderfully unfathomable, natural world? How does it so fail to hold our attention That we have to diminish it with the invention Of cheap, man-made myths and monsters?

This was originally published in Wire Magazine Issue 16.2017

#wire magazine #wiremag.com #wire #miami #miami beach #south beach #sobe #fort lauderdale #wynwood #wilton manors #gay #lgbt #glbt #matilda the musical #matilda #16.2017 #broward center for the performing arts

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milliebobbybrownfan · 6 years ago

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New Post has been published on Millie Bobby Brown Fan #MillieBobbyBrown #StrangerThings

New Post has been published on http://millie-bobby-brown.com/824-2/

Press/Photos: Millie for W Magazine

Lynn Hirschberg: Who is your girl crush? Millie Bobby Brown: Paris Jackson. She’s got great style. She’s like a sister to me. And she plays the piano!

2018: W Magazine

#Photo Sessions #Photos #Press #Scans

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milliebobbybrownfan · 7 years ago

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New Post has been published on Millie Bobby Brown Fan #MillieBobbyBrown #StrangerThings

New Post has been published on http://millie-bobby-brown.com/pressvideophotos-millie-bobby-brown-on-the-aftermath-of-stranger-things-my-whole-life-changed/

Press/Video/Photos: Millie Bobby Brown on the Aftermath of Stranger Things: "My Whole Life Changed"

As movies increasingly play to a global audience with an endless stream of superhero blockbusters, the television landscape is becoming more varied—and more compelling. But in addition to award-winning movie stars who have made the turn to the small screen, like Nicole Kidman and Alexander Skarsgård, who both starred in Big Little Lies, there are television’s breakout stars, as well. No one embodies this better than Millie Bobby Brown, who plays the otherworldly Eleven on Netflix’s Stranger Things. Now 13, Brown is one of the hottest rising stars in the world. Here, the young actress talks about how her life has changed since the premiere of Stranger Things, who she has a crush on, and what’s next.

Did you always want to be an actress? Yes always. I wanted to be a singer when I was three. I just started like humming, and I was really bad, and then I just started to like train myself. And then when I went to an acting school I realized I wanted to act as well. I started auditioning when I was 8 years old and I’m now 13.

Were there any movies or shows that inspired you? Let me think there’s so, so many – I love the musicals. Musicals had everything I loved in them. They would have singing, acting and dancing. High School Musical was a big part of my childhood. Like I just watched it every single day and got toys, like of the microphone, of them singing. I was obsessed.

And now you’ve met Zac Efron I did yes. I met Zac Efron at a project I was doing for Calvin Klein.

What were three the songs you loved to sing when you were younger? “Valerie” by Amy Winehouse.

Did you also do, “Rehab”? That one my dad would not allow. Amy Winehouse is my go-to, and Rihanna was pretty big at the time, too. “Diamonds,” “We Found Love.” It just kind of like got me going in the morning when I had to go school.

What was the first audition you remember getting? It was a Publix commercial. I went in there and I had no idea what I was doing. I just was like okay, “Hi my name is…” I was really boring. And then I had to hold cupcakes and say like, “Mom can I please have some chocolate chip cupcakes,” or something like that. And the guy actually grabbed my face, and then grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the audition and then said, “Where is your father?” “Where is your mother?” And started looking at all my parents, all the parents and my dad was like, “Uh, I’m her dad.” He was like, “She’s got the job, she’s got the job.” And I was like, “Okay, okay.” And like immediately I got the job. I was immediately happy and I was just very content and blessed. Like immediately I knew that I was just born to do this.

And did you do school plays, as well? Nope, I have never done a school play in my life. I would love to do a show on Broadway or you know, but I’ve just never gotten the chance or the opportunity to do it. But I had like I have done many auditions for Annie and, Matilda. I had to learn all the songs and then they’re like, “We don’t want you.” So it was like, “Okay well at least I know the songs.”

I thought you would be brilliant as Matilda. And what was the audition for Stranger Things like? The audition for Stranger Things was, it was like a hurry-up, no it was like a wait-hurry-up. I had no idea what I was auditioning for. It was just a roller coaster, I had no idea what I was doing. They gave me script, I read the script, they asked me back four times for an audition and then I Skyped with the directors and we talked about ’80s movies and E.T. and _Stand by M_e, Poltergeist, and I immediately fell in love with these directors and they were so young and I was so surprised by how like they were just geniuses.

And you had already seen Poltergeist? Yeah, I watched all the movies prior, so it was pretty easy to relate to them. And then they said, “Would you like to come out to L.A.?” So I flew to L.A. for a screen test with one of the other cast members, Finn Wolfhard, and the next day I got the job.

Did you know anything about the character before the screen test? Well, one of the directors came up to me and said, “Bzzzzzz” over my head and I didn’t know what he was talking about. I was like, “Okay he’s crazy. We clearly know which one is crazy.” And then the director was like, “Are you ready?” And I was like, “For what?” And then they said, “To cut all your hair off.” And I was like, “Oh okay. Um, all right.” And then the next day I got the job and I was like, “You know what I’m going to cut it, that’s it.”

That was a big decision. Yeah, but it’s only hair and at the end of the day, people don’t give it really a chance to make a decision to lose their hair and I did, so I wanted to embrace it and inspire people like Charlize Theron. I just thought, “Why not let’s try something new.” And it’s a different place, [it filmed in] Atlanta and I’ve never been there and, and I have no hair and I got called a “boy” a lot and I got called “John” a lot and I just accepted it. It was very fun and it was a different experience and very unique, but I enjoyed it a lot.

What was it like for you after the show started airing? I was back in England and then I went to the premiere. The premiere was kind of crazy. Everybody was like, “The show is really good” and I was like, “Okay,” like I don’t know what you’re talking about, this is just a little show in Atlanta, Georgia. And then three days later my whole life changed. My followers went up to a million and I was on you know magazines. And I never be, I never thought I’d be able to do all this stuff, but like when I go home every night I just remember the times where I would like walk on the street and everybody just sort of freak with the no hair. You know, nobody knew who I was. Them times were that like that, that times were good, but nothing like it is now and I’m just so grateful for everything I have and my family are still with me and we’re still going strong.

Is it odd to go back to shooting the show? Yes it’s very odd. We’re all the same from the first season. We all act the same. We’re always learning something new. You know, I’m so young and still I have no idea what things are. So it’s like I’m not thinking I know it everything. Like I’ve experienced so many things. I’ve been in fashion shows and shoots all the time, but I still get nervous and I still feel anxious.

You’re great at a party. I love parties! Noah kind of just lets me do the talking so I’ll just go in front I’ll be make say “Hi Ryan Gosling nice to meet you. I’m Millie.” [Laughs] And they would just be like, “Hi,” and I’m “These are my castmates.” So it’s like easier for them.

Who do you have a crush on other than Zac Efron? I mean, I don’t really know there’s so many people you could have crushes on. What is a real crush people? You know? What crushes you? Because if you really, if you define the word “crush” it’s a negative word.

I think it’s a positive word. Is it a positive word?

Yeah. Well your heart feels crushed. I don’t know. Your heart feels crushed.

So, who do you think? Leonardo DiCaprio. In everything. In general I just I love him. I think he’s a great actor.

Aren’t you too young for Titanic? No, no, no I think everybody has seen Titanic. Have you seen Titanic? You’ve seen Titanic.

Of course I’ve seen Titanic. Everybody has seen Titanic. You know who is my woman crush?

Yes. Paris Jackson. Because she’s awesome. She’s got great style. She’s a great person. Love the hair. She’s awesome and she plays the piano.

Really? Have you met her? Yes. That’s why. She’s like my sister, but she’s awesome, yeah.

So what are you doing next after the show? Do you have other, not after today, but are, do you have other movies, TV, documentaries, song festivals lined up? Yes. I’m going todo my first ever movie, which is Godzilla. So it’s really exciting.

Have you seen Godzilla? Yes. Not the originals, though. The originals like you have to get on a special website, so I watched the last one with Bryan Cranston it was so good.

And are you going straight from this movie or you go back to England in between? Straight from this movie I’m going to be I think I’m just going to be doing a little press for the show. And we have the whole Emmys thing… I’m so excited. I think the most important thing for the Emmys right now is what I’m wearing. That is actually one of the priorities.

And what are you wearing? Oh I have no idea. Mostly probably Calvin Klein by Appointment, so I think it’s going to be that, but overall I’m super excited. – Source

2017: Photo Session #007 (W Magazine)

#Calvin Klein #Godzilla #Photo Sessions #Photos #Press #Projects #Stranger Things #Videos

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