#i did notice louis panicking but somehow not the wound. need to watch this show in a movie theatre

[brotherconstant]

detail i didn't catch until i giffed this scene: louis noticing his unhealed self-inflicted bite wound from earlier that night (with jonah) and quickly moving his wrist out of lestat's sight.

[horansqueen]

BabyGirl 1.0

NOTES:

♥ this is based on a concept i received a few weeks ago and ppl asked that i made a story with it. ♥ i planned 3-4 long parts but i think it’ll be 8-10 short parts ♥ 3.7k. fluff. ♥ there may be smut but i doubt it and IF it happens it wont be as explicit as my other smut works. ♥ i didn’t proofread and if you read my stuff you know i never do because im a lazy ass. ♥ i would be SO SO SO happy to get feedback for this. please? ♥ if you have any questions please dont hesitate.  ♥ read part 2 HERE

                                        1.0  ♥ LIES & TIES ♥

HIM

The first time I met her, I noticed her. It was in the way she laughed, I think. That's what drew me to her first. Then, I noticed how clever and cheeky she was, but also how kind and generous she turned out to be. When I brought her outside to take her away from all the noise and music, it hit me how perfect her face looked through the moonlight, and how bad I wanted to kiss her. I made sure she was not panicking, and when our eyes met, I felt my heart twist. Maybe it was from all the beer I had swallowed, but I could swear it was from the way she actually looked at me: Intensely, like she was looking  for answers of existential questions through my eyes.

I remember the way her cold hands on my cheeks made a shiver run through my back, and how her warm lips against mine made me want to take a cab and bring her home. I had never felt my heart beat harder than that, and I remember thinking that I finally knew what it meant to be in love.

We wanted to take things slow, but the problem was that we couldn't stay away from each other. The waiting and the time apart didn't excite us, it actually made us miserable. When we both admitted that to each other, and to ourselves, we decided to take things as they came. And they came fast. But I didnt even feel nauseous or scared of the quick pace. Rather, it made my heart swell with all the feelings I had for her.

That's why I was a bit annoyed when I came home one day and she started asking me all these questions about our future and what I expected from this relationship. I was in a bad mood, just a bunch of small inconveniences that poured on me through the day, and rehearsing had been a pain in the ass. I didn't want to fight, but I also didn't want to sit down and talk about this.

I wanted a shower, a good fuck, and to watch the golf channel. But there she was, with her impossible questions and her crazy suspicions. Did I want kids with her? Why would she even ask that, at that very moment? I couldn't lie, we had talked about it a few times, late at night, in the darkness of my bedroom, but it was different than almost pressuring me into it, as if she wanted to start a family with me in the next hours.

We fought, and after telling her I could find an other girl, she stormed out. I couldn't blame her. I knew she was self-conscious, for no real reason in my opinion, and I twisted the knife deeper in the wound. I regretted my words as soon as they escaped my lips but it was too late and somehow, I felt like she wanted to leave anyway.

It took me months to call her again, which was quite surprising, knowing how close we used to be, but after that fight, I started questioning my feelings and hers. Did we really love each other? Would we really last? What was I missing by being in a steady relationship with an older girl whom I barely saw since I was always on tour or working?

One night, after getting drunk with the boys, I spilled my heart out to her on text, and when I realized she wouldn't answer, I cried. I cried like a fucking baby who had lost his mom forever. I cried like I had lost the love of my life. I cried because I knew it was really over, and that if I had called her before, maybe she would still be in my life.

"Mate, stop, why are you even crying?"

I sniffed, sitting up in bed and turning to Louis, a sudden realization coming through me.

"You! You call her and talk to her for me! Louis, you do it!"

I was not sure those were the words I used, and I probably slurred them a bit more, but it's how it sounded to me. Louis looked at me, raising his nose up. He never liked to get into his friends' business and the fact that he knew both of us made it even worse.

"You're her best mate! Call her! Please!"

I was literally begging my bandmate, the guy who was like a brother to me, to call my girlfriend for me. The girl who wouldn't even answer my text messages.

"I'm not her best mate at all. We're just... friends." he shrugged. "And I ain't gonna play matchmaker for you two. You got into this together, then work it out."

I felt my eyes burn again from the tears and stared at him intensely. I couldn't believe he was being so harsh with me and he finally turned to look at me and rolled his eyes with a sigh.

"Okay you know what? You get a rest and we'll discuss it tomorrow." he let out, clearly annoyed. "If you still want me to talk to her, I'll fly back home and pay her a visit. Just because I also need to see my family, alright?"

When he came back from that trip, though, he didn't mention anything. I waited, and waited, but after the third show we had in a row, I confronted him. It took him forever to answer and he just closed his eyes with a sigh. There was something he didn't want to mention, and I suspected she already had a new boyfriend.

"Look, Niall..." he sighed for a second time. "Just know that she doesn't want you back, okay? She's moved on, so you should do the same."

I wanted to ask more, I wanted to find out why she didn't want to be around me anymore, and why her love for me left so fast, but I just watched Louis get up and leave. I got drunk again that night, but I didn't message her. I threw my phone in a trash bin as soon as I found one and never looked back.

Perhaps, we weren't meant to be. After all, I couldn't dwell on the past or expect anything more if she didn't want it too. It was useless, and I had to mend the pieces of my heart back together quickly. We only have one life to live and I was one of the luckiest persons in the world. That's what I had to focus on.

God, I didn't know I was in for a ride.

HER

I met Niall one day that had started like all the others, except maybe the fact that Louis, who also happened to be a close friend of mine, had insisted I was there for his birthday. It was a cold december night and soon, I had felt overwhelmed by all the people, the noise and the alcohol. It was Niall who talked to me first, asking me if I was okay, and making sure I was not panicking. It was Niall who brought me outside, talked me out of my paranoia and helped me breathe. It was Niall who bent down to meet my eyes, made my heart melt, made me fall in love with him. And when it started snowing, I felt like I was in some sort of romantic Christmas movie.

We took things slow, and then we took things fast. I was happy with him and even if he was super busy and barely home, we always found ways not to let our relationship die. There was one day though... One day when everything changed.

When he walked inside, I was waiting for him, but I didn't think my heart would jump so high. He wasn't smiling like he normally does, and I thought that perhaps, something bad had happened at rehearsal. It made me nervous. Nervous to the point of swallowing the lump in my throat every 15 seconds. Nervous to the point of being nauseous and have sweaty hands. Nervous to the point of feeling like my whole future was going to be decided in the next hour of my life. I tried to push the bad thoughts away but without much success. I knew by just looking at his face that it was a bad time to have a serious discussion. I knew it was going to turn wrong. Thinking about it again, I realized I probably unconsciously wanted to fight with him to make things easier for both of us. I didn't want to ruin his life, and that's really what I felt I was doing.

"Do you want kids?"

He stopped dead in his track as the door closed behind him and turned to me, his lips now parted Clearly, he had a bad day and wasn't in the mood for this, but here I was, asking him some random question about the future, as if we never talked about it before.

I was so often at his place that it felt like home, but for some odd reason, I kept my own apartment. He had asked me a few times to move in, which was quite surprising coming from him, but I always refused. I was dating a rich kid in a boyband, the chances of him finding someone prettier, thinner and just simply better was very high, and I wasn't even sure why he was interested in me. He would probably tell me I need to be more confident, but I was not sure it was really what it was about. I was definitely not the most confident person in the world, but being scared to lose someone like Niall was not really just a part of my imagination.

"I..." he stopped, his eyes roaming on my face, and i tried to remain motionless, sitting straight on his sofa.

I was trying to keep eye contact but it wasn't as easy as I thought. I wanted to analyze his every reaction, as if it would change anything from what was about to happen.

"I already told you I wanted them, but later, when i'll be, i don't know..." he explained, raising his shoulders, shaking his head. "In my thirties?"

I felt my heart twist in my chest and I swallowed my tears, glancing down before looking back up in his eyes. He stared at me, slightly annoyed, slightly impatient, and I licked my lips.

"And, do you want them... with me?"

This time, it's fear I could read on his face. He was young, famous and rich. I could understand that the thought of promising his girlfriend to have babies with her was something scary. I was scared too, more than he could ever think, but I was doing my best not to show it.

"We're young, you know." he just said with a shrug. "I don't know what the future holds for us."

I closed my eyes and breathed in and out slowly and deeply. I wanted to insist, I had to insist. Even if I knew there was a big chance it would turn into an argument.

"I know, but you still plan on it, right?" I added, getting up. "You love me, and you want to spend your life with me, don't you?"

His face twisted again. I was aware I was asking a twenty-year old boybander if he wanted to spend his life with me. I was not even sure if he actually loved me and from seeing the expression on his face, I could tell he wasn't sure either. I loved him, though. Deeply, truly, with my entire being, I was in love with him, but I didn't expect him to return the feeling. In fact, I didn't expect anything. I couldn't expect anything.

"Why exactly are we having this discussion again?" he asked with a sigh. "I'm not ready to start a family, and you're not either. I'm going on tour in a few weeks, and it's not like we can really plan it anytime soon."

I kept silent and swallowed, glancing down at his feet. He had taken his shoes off and for some odd reason, I was endeared by the way he let his foot rub gently against the carpet. I wanted to move closer to him, I wanted him to engulf me in one of his incredibly satisfying and comforting hugs, but that was not going to happen.

"Plan it?" I just asked in a whisper, not even sure he actually heard me.

"Come on, love, look at me."

I breathed in and finally moved my chin up, my eyes meeting his immediately. He seems confused and still annoyed, but he called me love, and it made my heart melt every single time.

"Why are we talking about this?" he just wondered with a shrug. "I've had a bad day and to be honest, i'm really not in the mood for this shit."

Something stirred inside me when he talked and I felt tears burn my eyes. I had to do something, or else, I was going to cry and tell him everything.

"Shit? Are you fucking serious now?"

My answer took him by surprise and he raised his eyebrows, taking a short step back. I swallowed again and shook my head, closing my eyes for a few seconds before opening them again.

"I'm older than you, Niall, and i've always wanted a family." I pointed out, trying to let anger take over and erase my sadness. "If you're not sure you want that, then there's no point in even keeping this up."

I grabbed my purse on the floor roughly and moved past him to reach the door. He quickly stopped me, blocking me with one of his arms, and I tried not to look at him, knowing too well It was the best way for me to crack.

"Woa, calm down ok! That's not what I said!"

"Okay but that's what I said." I answered, feeling my voice started to shake. "You don't want to discuss this seriously? Then I'm out."

Silence fell between us for a few seconds but he remained motionless.

"Now let me go."

Something clearly burst inside him because he moved his arm and suddenly got angrier than I've ever seen him.

"Yea? FINE THEN!" he swung both his arms exaggeratedly in the door's direction. "Just fucking leave! You think I'm gonna weep and cry? I can have ANYONE okay, ANYONE."

I deserved it. I deserved that outburst and I deserved his anger, but despite this fact, his words hurt me deeper than I could have imagined. He knew this was something that bothered me and made me insecure, and he used it against me. I felt myself tear up and turned to look at him. As soon as he saw my face, his expression changed into a guilty one and my eyes got smaller at the rage now invading my whole body and mind.

"Well good for you! You do that!" I expressed roughly, staring him. "You go get that fucking perfect girl and forget about me and all that we had! Who cares, right?"

I didn't want for his answer, I just rushed out. He could have ran after me but he didn't. I could have walked back in to tell him the truth but I didn't. I just drove home, sobbing the whole time of the ride, and walked into an empty apartment I hadn't seen in weeks. It was cold, sad, and most of all, it was Niall-less.

Out of pain, I threw my purse violently down, watching as its content scattered all over the wood floor. The only thing that actually reached my feet was a white stick. Watching it made me cry even more. I let myself fall on the cold floor and pressed my palms on my eyes. I didn't want all of this to happen. I didn't want to lose Niall. And thinking i'll never be close to him anymore makes me literally want to vomit. I pulled my hands away but I could barely see anything because of the tears. I reached for the stick and blinked a few times, trying to clear my eyes, and held my breath, looking at the pregnancy test I took only a few hours before.

Positive. The little plus sign seemed to get bigger and bigger as I stared at it, as if it was taunting me. I could almost hear it say "Hey, I just ruined your relationship! Now you're gonna have to raise that baby all alone!" But the truth was, I had ruined my own relationship. It was all me. I couldn't blame anyone else. The truth was, I knew it would ruin Niall's career, and I didn't want to lock him into a relationship and a situation he would feel miserable in. I didn't want to turn this talented and happy young man into a desperate and unhappy person, even if it would be despite myself.

That's why I never called him again, and that's why I didn't answer when he messaged me, a few months later. I knew he was on tour and I knew he sometimes got lonely in his hotel room, and it was definitely not a good reason to come back in his life. He was touring, he was happy, he was living his dream, and there was no way I was going to take that away from him. I would hate myself forever If i ever did that.

To my biggest surprise, it knocked on my door a few days after ignoring Niall's text messages, and I really didn't expect who was on the other side. I opened the door slowly, peeking out and my eyes got bigger when I saw Louis standing there. He looked tired but still amazing, and my lips curled at his sight. I didn't think twice and threw myself in his arms before he wrapped them around me. It only lasted a few seconds though and he quickly pulled away, his eyes falling on my growing stomach.

"Oh my... god."

I breathed in and my hand reached for my tummy, as if it could hide anything from my pregnancy.

"Is this... Is it...?"

"Louis, please come in, okay?"

I turned around and walked back inside, hearing him close the door behind us and I brought him to the nursery I had prepared. He stayed in the door frame, his eyes roaming on the pink walls, the stuffed animals, and the pure white drawers I had bought. It took him a whole minute to finally turn to me, his eyes dropping to my belly again.

"You have to tell Niall..."

"No!" I cut him straight and breathed in and out slowly. "And you can't tell him either."

"If it's his baby, he deserves to know..."

I raised my hand up, making him stop talking, and closed my eyes. I didn't expect Louis to be here, I didn't expect him to see me like this and discover my secret, but now that he had, I couldn't just let him leave and spill it all to Niall. I knew he would come back and try to work things out with me, and I couldn't let him ruin his tour and his life for me.

"Louis, you're my oldest friend." I argued, opening my eyes to meet his. "I've known you since I was a kid, and i'm begging you, in the name of our friendship, don't tell Niall. Please. He's happy, he's touring the world, he's doing what he likes... and I want that for him. I want him to keep doing that. I don't want to be the girl who forced him into a relationship and a family life."

Louis started at me for a while. He stared at me for so long that I thought he would never speak again. I tried to concentrate on my heart beating hard against my chest, hoping to get it back to a normal speed, but it's only when Louis nodded that a feeling of relief washed over me.

"Thank you."

He moved closer and stared at my belly again. I reached down and grabbed his hand, placing it on the side of it and when I felt the baby hit, my lips curled. His head raised up quickly and a surprised expression appeared on his face, making me chuckle.

"Fooking hell..."

This time, I laughed and he shook his head, leaving his hand on me.

"So this is real, you're gonna have Niall's baby."

My smile fell and his hand too. We looked up in each other's eyes with serious faces and I finally nodded.

"Most of all though, it's my baby." I explained. "And you need to promise me, Lou."

"What am I supposed to tell Niall? I told him i'd check on you and find out why you won't answer his messages."

I walked to the couch and sat on it. There was no real comfortable position and I gave up on trying to find one.

"He literally declared his love to me, you knew that? I mean, he's been ignoring me for months now. I can't be with someone who's there only when he wants to. I bet he was drunk and alone when he sent these texts?"

From Louis' expression, I knew I was right and I just shrugged.

"Just tell him I don't want anything to do with him anymore. He'll get over me, he'll find someone else. We both know it, right? He'll be happier this way."

Louis left and promised to call me from time to time. A few weeks later, I even received a large box full of goodies, from toys to diapers, and I couldn't believe how lucky I was to be friends with someone like him. I wanted him to be the godfather but I knew how unfair it would be to ask him to lie even more to a guy he considered his brother, so I didn't.

I thought it was all over. I thought i'd never see Niall again. I thought I was over him. Boy, I've never been more wrong in my entire life.