#i did not just refresh the starter i was gonna post again

[thefanficmonster]

Begone

Streamer Gang & Asexual Reader (Gender Neutral)

Warnings: Acephobia, Swearing

Genre: Platonic Fluff, Comfort, RPF (Real Person Fic)

Summary: Having recently come out as asexual, Y/N faces some less than pleasant or appropriate responses in their chat during their stream with the gang. Luckily, they’re not alone in battling the haters this time.

Requested by the lovely Anon who told acephobes to begone, yeah you know who you are hehe. Thank you so much for the request darling! Let’s show these acehobes who they’re messing with! Love, Vy ❤

Boy is this nerve-wrecking or what? Sure, I maybe woke up with a ton of confidence, I listened to motivational and uplifting talks and listened to mood boosting music. I had a healthy breakfast and a cup of coffee. Damn it, I went on a run, all in an attempt to convince myself that dealing with the online world again is but a piece of cake for a badass like me. Well, low and behold, that feeling didn’t last very long. Here I am, chewing my nails off at the though of hopping in the Discord call and Among Us lobby with my friends and starting my stream. It’s not like I’m not expecting my friends and fans to support me - of course I am! I know they’re gonna give me a ton of love and appreciation and support and uplift me no matter what. But then again, there’s still those people who believe me and other people like me to be invalid and broken and whatnot.

Those are the ones I wanna avoid. 

It’s not like their words mean much to me but I simply don’t wanna see em, you know? It’s not only about me - it’s least about me actually - it’s more about all those wonderful people they are insulting when they say shit like that about asexuals and all the people on the ace spectrum. I can’t help but flare up and get angry on the behalf of all my ace friends and even people I’ve never met.

It’s also my first time being directly thrown into the fire instead of getting caught in the crossfire seeing as how I came out to my fandom via a tweet and an Instagram post a week ago, telling my identity’s truth: finally bringing my asexuality to the surface to shine its brightest so I can be be my best and reach for my full potential.

But damn am I afraid to see how everyone took it. 

My friends were quick to jump in and take me offline before I start refreshing my own posts to see the comments under them. Lord knows that without them I would’ve driven myself insane, I’ll forever be grateful for what they did and the lengths they went to to keep me offline and whatnot. One word to give you an idea of how invested they were in this: origami. All of us might as well have been born with two left hands and yet we still tried doing origami. Freaking origami.

Damn do I love my friends.

But now I don’t have sheets of paper and my friends to distract me. I have a fanbase to entertain and another friend group I haven’t talked to in a while. I don’t wanna get any predictions in already so I don’t jinx myself, so I’m just gonna say it’s gonna be...interesting regardless of what happens.

Then again, when is it not interesting when the streamer gang’s involved.

Deep breaths, Y/N. You got this

Listening to that encouraging little voice inside my head, I finally equip my headphones and in one fluid motion turn my camera on, officially starting my stream and unmuting my mic as I hop in the call with everyone.

“Hi guys! Guess who’s returned!“ I exclaim cheerfully, desperate to hide the nervousness of my voice.

“You really missed your opportunity to say ‘guess who’s back...back again’ didn’t you?“ Charlie is the one who greets me first, sounding rather disappointed in me in his usual jokester manner. It’s nice to hear, it makes me feel like nothing’s changed in the week I’ve been gone. Like I’m still the same person to these people. I really am the same, I just now am a lot better version of myself. Almost as though I’ve reached my final form. It feels empowering really. “I’m kidding, I’m kidding.” Charlie laughs again, “Congrats, by the way. You keep proving you can get cooler and cooler.“

“Careful there Charlie, I can only handle so large of an ego.“ I joke back, rolling my eyes playfully as a wide grin spreads across my face, “No, but seriously, thank you so much, man. It means the world to me that you support me.“

“Um, how could we NOT?“ That’s very clearly Rae, “Hun, you are so brave and amazing and wonderful, how could we ever NOT support you?“

“Yeah, we’ll always support you no matter what, Y/N. We’ll always be your friends, through thick, thin and beyond.“ Poki too interferes, her words only making my smile wider.

“Alright, alright, y’all are gonna make me cry and I haven’t even read my chat yet, hold on.“ I say, fanning my face to dry the tears I hope the webcam isn’t spotting, “Darn, you guys are the best. Sorry, give me a sec to gather my composure, I’ll be right back.“

I quickly mute my in-game mic as I turn to my chat where I see the same amount of love and support in the form of comments and emojis flooding in from my viewers. A warm feeling spreads throughout my chest, making me feel the most comfortable with myself I’ve ever felt. The most loved I’ve ever felt. The most seen and understood. To finally be you feels like you are finally really living in this world, not like you’ve been already living in it for God knows how long. It makes me so freaking happy and fulfilled to finally be living as me, as the real me.

Unfortunately, in life, nothing can be 100% pure and good. There’s always at least 1% there threatening to ruin all your happiness you worked so hard to build or obtain. It may be one in a hundred, but fuck it’s powerful and effective.

And in my case it comes in the form of two comments that stick out to my eyes. Acephobic comments saying my identity’s fake, claiming I’m faking it, saying us acephobes are immature creatures who refuse to grow up, or attention whores. Or just saying we’re delusional and in denial, confused about who we are.

I hadn’t even realized I was clenching my jaw and fists but when I do, I slowly relax my muscles and crack my knuckles before addressing the two people who spat out that nonsense.

“Ok, listen here, shooterpro69 and yourmom_lol. For starters, I want to apologize for your ignorance and lack of education on the matter of asexuality. In fact, for you especially, I plan on making an educational video, explaining asexuality to people who need or want to learn more. You, my friends, are in desperate need to be fed some knowledge cause damn, God knows how many people secretly think you’re hella stupid. Not that they’re wrong to think so but anyway. Unless you have anything nice or positive to say, begone from my chat. Actually, when I think about it, begone from every chat. No one needs you polluting their communities with acephobia and hate.“ I say, all spoken in a calm tone despite the boiling anger within me. People who know me well would probably be able to tell I’m fuming underneath the calm façade, but at least I got my message across loud and clear.

“WOO HOO, You tell em Y/N!“ Toast cheers, clapping his hands and whistling as more cheering arises from each my friends, leaving me in a state of mild shock and confusion.

Wait, what?!

“Um, wait, you guys heard that?“ I ask, my eyes darting to thein-game mic symbol that shows an not crossed-off mic, meaning it was enabled during the entirety of my speech.

“Hell yeah we did! You slayed them, Y/N! Damn goddamn!“ Rae whistles too, her enthusiasm wafting over me like a breath of fresh air.

“I second that!“ Corpse joins in, “And remember what we said - we’ll support you through anything. Need to bury an acephobe’s body, we’re the people you should call.” He says, confident as heck.

And I just can’t hold it in anymore - I burst out laughing, doubling over from the intensity.

If I thought I was happy and fulfilled before, this has to be the closest to paradise I’m gonna get on Earth.  All thanks to these wonderful people. Friends are really something else aren’t they: they come into your life - often unexpectedly - and change it completely. Suddenly you’re not alone, you’re not forced to deal with everything and face everything on your own. Someone’s got your back and you’ve got theirs.

Through thick, thin and beyond.

And it’s so fucking amazing.

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[jaeminscoffee]

Cordolium

Cordolium- Heartfelt sorrow, heartache (n.)

Pairing- Lee Jeno x reader

Genre- Fluff for starters, angst for main course.

Word count- 1.78k

Warnings- Y/n’s led on by Jeno. Or she just misinterpreted his actions, also horribly written ✌

Summary- Who’d known one picture was all it would take to break your heart.

Having gotten into your dream university called for leaving your comfort house and moving into a completely foreign environment, where everyone would be strangers unlike your town where everyone knew each other. 

You were already cranky about the fact that you had to shift, added to that came the news that you’d have a roommate since the last room available was allotted to the student who enrolled in just minutes before you. 

It was a bittersweet feeling. Bitter because you have to live with a total stranger having to share common spaces, personality could be who knows how. Sweet because you’d have a familiar face to look around in the University for. 

“Y/n did you see my blue hoodie?” your roommate screamed from his room, to you who was seated on the couch by the living room. “Hmm?” you hum back, knowing full well the hoodie he’s implying to is the one you’d adorned right now. 

“Come on doll, is there any hoodie of mine that you haven’t worn yet?”

Jeno is the perfect roommate. You’d been shocked the first day you punched in the password to your apartment, opening the door only to be greeted with a guy who had nothing but a towel around his torso. Half shocked at the fact that your roommate for the rest of your semester would be a guy. Half shocked that an extremely good looking guy was your roommate. 

Jeno made the unknown neighborhood seem as though you’d been there all your life. He shooed away all your homesickness, never giving you time to even miss your street by bringing up new things to keep the pair of you occupied. 

“Uh? The one that you bought yesterday? I haven’t worn that yet.” you flash him a smile as Jeno passed you a look of boredom. “It was a rhetorical question, Y/n” he shook his head, making his way towards you with nothing but his sweats on. 

Not the first time you’ve seen him half naked, you’d seen him like that almost every other day, Jeno had clearly grown ridiculously close to you. But the sight of his toned abs and chiseled chest never fails to fluster you. “look at the picture you have of me half naked, you’re basically burning holes into my abs, babe” he retorted after plopping down on the seat beside yours and you immediately shift position to lay down on the couch with your head on his lap. 

“Bold of you to assume i still have that image, Jen” you say, handing him the remote to select what you two would be watching that evening as you tug on his free hand, bringing it up to your hair and placing it there, shaking your head slightly as a signal for him to run his fingers through your hair. 

This is how it’d been since you two grew close. You had a very, very touchy friendship. You had no objections to that, absolutely loving the cuddles and names he’d given you.

All fears of being alone had gone with the wind after the news of you being THE Lee Jeno’s roommate spread throughout the campus. The undivided attention you’d receive didn’t faze you though, knowing full well it was all just a way to somehow get Jeno to pay attention to them. 

That didn’t matter though since you’d found a perfect friend circle for yourself. That friend circle being Jeno’s friend circle. They were all extremely bubbly and accepting of your joining in the group. One particularly was extremely close to you. Jaemin. Having shared the same energy level and brain cells, you got close to each other really quick. 

Jeno chuckles at your antics before complying to your silent request, “Whatever. Though, I’d actually say nothing if you do end up being the first one to wear my new hoodie” you look up at him, confused. “you look cute in my clothes” he sends a wink in your way, leaning down to press a small peck on your forehead before diverting his attention to the shows he constantly switched back and forth to. 

“Oh? Then maybe i should change into that right now-” you attempt to get up fast to hide your blushing self, only to be pulled back with a strong grip on the material of your (his) hoodie which resulted in you falling right back onto Jeno’s lap. “Maybe you shouldn’t” he gave you a playful warning look, breaking out into a smile seeing you huff out giggles. 

“But you just said you don’t mind!” you try standing up again, “doesn’t matter” he pulls you back with more force, now locking you in a tight embrace as your head gets flushed into the nape of his neck, arms holding his bare shoulder for support.

Married couple. A title your friends had given you due to the pair of yours dynamic. It’s kind of like an inside joke at this point. Each time they’d point out you having something more than a platonic friendship, Jeno would always be the first one to dismiss it, clearing all misunderstandings whereas you’d make little to no effort to do so. Your love for the lad basically oozed out of you. 

It’s a little hard to not have feelings for a guy with the personality of an angel, behavior intact and looks as a plus one. You are sure he had at least a little something for you seeing his actions, lingering kisses, touches. You are so sure he’s got at least something for you.

Pressing one last kiss to the side of your head, he moves you gently off of him and onto the fluffy couch as you stare at him in confusion, clearly not liking the warmth being taken away from you. “what happened?” you ask him, about to pull him back down, “I promised a friend I’d go over, we’ll cuddle once i return home, is that alright with you doll?” he inquires, leaning down to smoothen down the hair that was sticking out here and there from his previous actions. 

“Why wouldn’t i be alright with that? As long as you give me all the cuddles we’re missing out on right now” you feign anger to which he gave you his signature eye smile. “Of course.” With that he left the room, probably to change into something else. 

You really wanted to spill out your feelings for the lad to him, you weren’t scared of being rejected. Jaemin, Jeno’s known better half, had assured you multiple times of how you’d definitely be the only one to catch Jeno’s attention. 

What you were really scared of was if you’d lose what you had right now. Feelings are stuff that comes and goes in a rapid and you can lose everything you have if your feelings for the other deteriorates somehow. But your friendship was way more important to you than your feelings and you wouldn’t, in a million years, want to lose what you’ve established with Jeno. 

You spend the rest of your evening watching shows, painting your nails, and even reminding yourself to make one of Jeno’s favourite dishes for dinner once he gets home, mentally thanking Jaemin for reminding you to not forget that little confession plan you had plotted. 

You’d make it subtle that you’re in love with your roommate through your actions rather than words, though, he’d be an idiot if he hadn’t already noticed at least a bit of affection for him through your clinginess. 

You make your way to your room after turning the flame down to low upon hearing your phone ring. You wipe your hands on your hoodie before pressing the red button and picking it up, Jaemin’s contact taking up its place on your screen.

“Jaem?” you inquire stupidly as though his caller ID didn’t make it obvious enough that it was, in fact your best friend calling you.

“I would have barged into your house if you’d taken any longer to pick up the call but congratulations for finally gathering some balls to do it Y/n!!” Jaemin screams into the speaker, obvious that he’s excited. “Congrats?” you ask back.

“Yes! Finally! You guys look so cute in that image, I almost threw it at Haechan!” he replied with the same energy. Confusion clouds your mind as you try making sense of his words. 

“Picture? Congratulations? Jaem, what are you talking about?" 

"You know! The picture he just posted of the two of you being all lovey-dovey! I never took Jeno to be a romanticist! Like, the caption??-” you immediately open your laptop to log into your social to see what imagine Jaemin was talking about, “I have a slight doubt that you’re the one who posted it from his-” finally in on instagram, you scroll down to see any new posts of your roommate,

“-phone, but like. I’m so glad that you asked him out, knowing Jeno, he’d never do it unless you double dog dare him-” running impatient hearing Jaemin ramble on about the said image, you finally search up Jeno’s name, feeling your stomach churn with an unknown feeling. 

“Also, did you dye your hair? You look really cute in that image though it isn’t all that clear! I told you from day one you’re a match made in heaven-”

You click on the recent post, the image of Jeno, leaning in, pressing a kiss on the lip of a girl unknown to you fills up your screen, ‘my one and only for eternity’ as the caption. “How was the kiss?-” you pause for a second, refreshing the page to see if it’s really an image of Jeno, kissing a girl, “Jaem.." 

"I mean, if you’re gonna act all shy with me now then don’t tell me, but tell me how did you confess to him?” you can physically feel your heart drop down to your stomach

“Jaemin..” “you finally get to call him your boyfriend, Y/n! No space between the two words! I can’t believe he decided to make your relationship public the day of confession! But seriously-”

“Jaemin listen-" 

"I’m still not over the caption, where did the confession take place?? You should’ve called me man! I would’ve recorded it-”

“Jaemin!” you finally scream, losing it at all the words coming out of his mouth, feeling enraged at yourself for ever thinking you stood a chance. Hearing the line go silent, you feel something wet travel down your cheeks the more you stare at your crush kissing a girl that’s not you. You choke out a silent sob. How are you supposed to face him after today, knowing everything you felt for him was unrequited?

“That girl in the image is not me.”

[ilguna]

Redamancy - Chapter Three (f.o)

summary: it’s time to forgive and repair.

warnings; swearing, drug use/mention, alcohol use, hints at prostitution and I bend the Capitol to my will.

wc; 9.9k

NOTES; I give reader a last name to fit the world.

–

This morning, you’re up and out of bed without a single complaint. You sit on the bed for a while, staring out the window and watching as the city slowly comes to life. Traffic is light for the first hour or so, but it doesn’t stay like that. You can imagine that everyone is anticipating tomorrow, the last day before the games start.

One breather day before it all goes downhill.

You get out of bed after that, taking your time inside of the shower, mainly trying to find what Annie and Marsh will be like during the interviews. There’s nothing that the Capitol hasn’t seen before, seventy years worth of the Hunger Games--they’ve experienced it all. The most you can do is put a twist on an adjective.

New approaches are always hard, you’re competing with ten to twenty other mentors. Most of them have been at this longer than you have--mainly Haymitch. But to be fair, Haymitch gave up on this whole scheme a while ago. The only thing he does anymore is drink and make a fool of himself on television all the time.

Sad to say, but District Twelve isn’t a threat at all. They didn’t even really post a threat during your games, either. That’s a conversation for a different day, though. You’re not really willing to get into it anymore. Your focus needs to be on helping Annie and Marsh.

By the time you’re dressed and in the dining room, you’ve still come up with nothing. The only other person at the table this morning is Finnick, which is a pleasant surprise. Elysia is always the first and last person out of the dining room. Not to mention, you’re pretty sure she sits out here and waits hours for you guys to appear. It explains why she has the tv on all the time when you get out here.

“Looks like you’ve got an early start going on too.” you say, heading down the steps.

He hums, head dips and then he’s shooting upright in his seat.

“Okay, maybe not.” you stop next to him, grabbing his chin with one hand to make him look up at you. His pupils are dilated, bags beneath his eyes. He looks much older here, not the same guy he was yesterday, “How about you take today off?”

“I’m fine.” he murmurs, moving your hand away, “Just a late night.”

“Go sleep while you can.” you tell him, “Hopefully some of the drugs will wear off by then.”

“They already have, they don’t work anymore.” he yawns, and then moves the plates out of his way so he can rest his head on his arms.

You count in your head how long it takes for him to fall asleep. At five seconds, you get your breakfast, at ten his closed eyes aren’t as tense. When it hits fifteen, his mouth parts and body slumps. He’s out cold by eighteen, nice and steady breaths. It’s going to be a quiet morning after all.

“Can I get something to write on?” you ask the avox.

She gives you a curt nod and disappears. In the meantime, you eat your breakfast and stare at Finnick, who looks like he’s never had a tense moment in his life. The only times Finnick truly looks relaxed is when he’s not awake. As if he’s never been in the Hunger Games, his family isn’t gone, and he’s never worked every night in the Capitol since he turned sixteen.

Your stomach churns, heart squeezing painfully. You try not to frown, but it’s hard not to. A part of you wonders if this is what you look like to your family when you accidentally fall asleep on the couch or in the study, working on paperwork for the boarding school. You’re just a pair of overworked kids, who have never had a peaceful moment since the Hunger Games.

The avox comes back around, you quietly thank her and ask her to clean up Finnick’s plates. She doesn’t disturb him, clearly good at her job. You chew on the inside of your cheek while writing down different adjectives that could describe Annie and Marsh’s personalities right now.

Annie is quiet, she doesn’t speak unless it’s a dire situation or you’ve asked a question. She’s smart and trusting, she can work her way around problems and read into cryptic messages. She’s kind, you’ve seen the way she helps the others in the boarding school, but she’s easily deadly, the way she fights is completely mesmerizing. She’s the last person you’d expect to betray you, which is why she could easily have an advantage over a large alliance. People wouldn’t expect her to sabotage them.

As for Marsh, he’s nearly the opposite when he isn’t feeling anxious. He’s loud, he’ll easily let someone know what he thinks about them, especially if it’s not good. He’s strong, you’ve seen him pick up people twice his weight, but that doesn’t make him a good fighter, exactly. He wrestles pretty well, can get anyone into a position that’ll bring them to tears because of the pain. He smiles a lot, cracks jokes when he can.

You hum lightly, feeling it all come together. Marsh is fun, loud, he can make a show out of the interview. Three minutes would be enough to have the entire audience in stitches. It might even surprise the audience a little, since they always expect the careers to be brooding and quiet, always banking on their training scores. But if Marsh is constantly moving and interacting with the audience, they’ll be taken off guard.

Same thing with Annie, but she isn’t as naturally smooth like he is. She can be friendly and compassionate on stage, the complete opposite of deadly. The Capitol has been holding onto stereotypes for years, and the tributes have been feeding into it. Even you did the same, by promising your family that you’d come home. If Annie just acts as the definition of kind, she’ll be turning it around.

You write this all down, as well as some notes and starter questions that could test their act. You want them to completely avoid conversations about their scores and how well prepared they are. Their scores already say that about them, now it’s time for the citizens to see that they’re exciting.

Around noon, Elysia finally comes through the door. She barely spares you and Finnick a glance at first, but then she pauses on the stairs to take a look at him, “Is he sleeping?”

“Late night, apparently.” you look at her, “I’m ready to get started when you are.”

“Give me a couple of minutes.” she smiles, and then leaves into the hallway.

Unfortunately, this means that Finnick can’t sleep any longer. At least he got a couple of hours while it was possible. You lean against the table slightly, “Finnick.”

He doesn’t move, not even stirring. You wonder what else he took on top of the regular ‘fun’ drugs. Maybe he drank along with it, and knowing the Capitol, it’s not as dangerous as it sounds. You call his name again, but he’s still pretty out of it. A part of you wonders if he’d actually care letting the tributes see him in such a vulnerable state. But if it were you, you’d hope that he’d wake you up.

You slide out of your chair, letting it scrape against the wood floors. You grimace at the thought of touching him to wake him up, you know for a fact that you hated it when your brothers used to do it. It took for that one time when you accidentally went overboard for them to realize that you meant what you were saying about it being a bad idea.

They tried to tell you that you’d never hurt them. But you had to emphasize that it wasn’t you that was waking up first, it’s the scared girl that spent an entire month in an arena that was trying to kill her. She’s going to come out offensive and on the move, you’re going to be right behind her.

Even reminding them about the time someone came up behind you after the games didn’t convince them either. It was right after the Hunger Games too, before the Victory Tour. Some idiot reporter came up behind you as a surprise, and it took half a second before the world went grey and you thought the reporter was the District Twelve boy.

And since in the Hunger Games, the only way to get home is to kill, you nearly murdered the reporter. It would’ve happened if it weren’t for your brothers, who took a hit in the process anyway. If you remember correctly, Mox came out with a bruised rib, which isn’t easy to do considering that he’s pretty much muscle. And you almost broke Reed’s nose, there was blood leaking from it for a good ten minutes afterward.

You guess that they were trying to give you the benefit of the doubt, but after a while, you’re just intentionally getting burned, you know? There’s only so much you can do for a person before you need to take their word for it. It’s fine if you’re not perfectly healed just yet. Time does not heal all wounds, some of them will be open forever.

You gently place your hand on Finnick’s back, rubbing it, “Hey, Finnick?” you try your motherly voice, but it still doesn’t seem to be working. Maybe he’s dead.

“Finnick.” you apply more pressure, hearing him take a deep breath.

His arms stretch out beneath him, head slowly raising. You back off, and run a hand through your hair on your way back to your place at the table. Finnick’s got red lines from his clothing across his face, eyes automatically in a squint. His eyebrows push together, looking at your first.

“What time is it?”

“Noonish.” you say, “Tributes are gonna come out in a minute, Elysia is back.”

“You just left me out here?” his nose scrunches.

“No, I actually sat out here the entire time.” you sit in your seat, and then frisbee the notepad across the table for him to look at.

He rubs his face, which is still twisted as he tries to read what you’ve written, “Creep.”

You roll your eyes.

As he reads, Elysia comes out looking more refreshed, “Tributes will be down here in a moment.” she joins you and Finnick at the table, “Am I starting with Annie first?”

“If you want, our plans go either way.” you say, watching as Finnick tilts his head, “What do you think?”

“It’s a twist.” he says, “I’m not sure how they’ll like it, but we can definitely try.”

“Everything’s worth a try nowadays.”

“Can I see?” Elysia asks, Finnick hands it over to her. She reads over it silently, a smile coming to her face as she nods, “Yeah, I think this’ll be good. I’ll try to work that into what we normally do.”

Elysia hands it back to you, Marsh and Annie come out of the hallway. They’re not dressed in anything fancy, not even in something that the stylists have picked out. Normally what the tributes wear are totally up to the stylists, starting from the tribute parade, to the training days, to the interviews. Today is the only day where you’re able to see how they want to be dressed.

Annie’s laid back, a pair of leggings and a loose tank top. She’s got her hair tied back, and gives you and Elysia a polite smile on her way over. Marsh is more casually dressed, jeans, a shirt, a pair of tennis shoes, his hair styled. It says a lot about personality and how they think.

“Good afternoon, hope you guys slept well.” you smile, and then give Finnick a side-eye. He’s not very amused.

“I definitely felt a lot better last night.” Marsh nearly skips down the steps, he’s a lot more confident now, “Since we have good scores, it’s hard to think otherwise.”

He takes his spot at the table, Annie takes hers, “I’m still nervous,” she admits.

You don’t have to say a single thing to her. In fact, Marsh seems to have it all handled this afternoon. He’s definitely had a change of heart. You finish eating, leaving the table to go down to the living room to rearrange chairs and set things up properly. It’s not long until your tributes are full and ready to get started.

“We’re taking Marsh first.” you click the pen, Finnick joins your side.

Elysia guides Annie towards her room, Marsh comes down to where you are. You motion for him to take his seat, which is opposite of the one that you’re sitting in. Finnick takes the role of audience, leaning his head against his fist. He’s got tired eyes, still not awake. You can’t really blame him.

“How do you feel about being in front of an audience?” you ask.

He hesitates, “Is this an interview question?”

“No, not yet.”

“Oh, well…” he thinks for a moment, “I mean, I don’t mind them. The parade wasn’t all that bad. But I think that’s because I was being compared to others, I knew I wasn’t the best or the worst out there.”

You give him a smile, “Well, we’re going for the best here. So, here’s what we’re going to do--”

It’s simple, and Marsh seems to understand it the first time around. No matter what happens on that stage, Caesar shouldn’t ever get the opportunity to make enough tension to ruin the light mood. Marsh needs to be confident, exciting, funny and relatable the entire time.

Which means that if Marsh needs to spend time lining up jokes, then he needs to get to it. You suggest jokes on the expense of District Four--or any of the districts, really--his family if he’s comfortable, and spin it. Make the Capitol look grand and amazing, like kings and queens compared to peasants. However, he needs to be careful not to make him sound sarcastic and overbearing.

There’s a whole list of things that Marsh needs to avoid at all costs; certain family topics, token significance, if he misses home, his training score, what he thinks of the competition, etc. He’s not at all allowed to give the Capitol enough information on him to run with. Tributes in the past have been mysterious, but mentors have combined it with brooding.

Marsh is going to be memorable, fun-loving. Caesar might even reference him in the future when it comes to seeing District Four tributes. What twist will the mentors have to give this year? Stay tuned to see, and if you blink too much, you’ll miss it.

And since it’s not really a coaching lesson without some practice, you and Finnick take turns drilling him. Marsh is clearly a natural at this, he starts off a little stiff, jokes dry and shy smiles. You had to tell him that he needs to stop looking at you as a mentor and as a Capitol citizen who is so unimpressed by how boring he is.

After that, he took it more seriously, and even had you and Finnick cracking up some of the time. Only a few times do you have to remind him not to go too hard on District Four, and how he barely scrapes by with questionable statements about the Capitol. In the end, he’s at a different standing point.

Elysia comes out with Annie, ready to trade. Annie’s flustered, standing at the top of the stairs. She must have done something inside of the room to get scolded, or maybe she was praised? You don’t care, you push Marsh up the stairs and let Annie take a quick snack break before you start the process over.

“Marsh’s interview is going to be a comedy skit.” you tell her once she’s sat down. You and Finnick have switched spots so that he can ask the questions, “We figured that you wouldn’t be as comfortable with a job like that. So, we want you to be as kind as possible.”

Annie’s eyebrows draw in, “If you’re trying to go for unique, you’re going to be failing with me. Plenty of people go for kind.”

“Not the careers.” Finnick says, “Careers always sneak in some aspect of dangerousness. You’re not going to, at all. You got a nine, but Annie Cresta is going to be a kind girl from Four who’s absolutely beguiled by the Capitol.”

A small smile is forming on your face, “You’re going to have to be an actress for three minutes on stage. Do you think you can do it?”

Annie gives a curt nod. Finnick’s smiling now too. You can’t launch straight into the interview, instead you have to give Annie a few pointers beforehand. She catches on quickly, just like Marsh. However, with her, she’s got the act down on lock, she doesn’t even need to be corrected.

And when Finnick alludes to her training score, she easily redirects the conversation somewhere else. Maybe it’s a compliment on the experts inside of the center, or maybe it reminds her about the food she’s eaten! Either way, Annie’s a brick wall, and not even you two can get through to her on the sneakiest questions.

At dinner, Marsh, Annie and Finnick are exhausted, you think that you’re starting to feel it too. Needless to say, it makes for a calm and quiet evening. Annie and Marsh pack it up and head to their rooms around seven, there’s not a single sound that comes from their rooms after.

You sit on the edge of a table next to Elysia and Finnick. You’ve got your arms crossed, Elysia has her fingers perfectly laced in front of her, and Finnick is rubbing under his eye.

“Tomorrow’s the big day.” Elysia says, “I think that you two will be able to sleep in and get up later on, since the prep team will have them.”

“We still have to get up with enough time to dress nicely. Sometime in the afternoon, then?”

“That’ll probably work.” Finnick says, you watch as he twists the loose rope on the bracelet into small loops big enough to slip his pinky through.

You tilt your head up towards the roof, eye following the cracks along the ceiling, “Are you busy tomorrow night?”

“After the interviews?”

You think you can see a stain on the ceiling, a faint red color, like someone scrubbed the ceiling, “Yeah.” you look back at him.

“No, I don’t think so. The festival knocks out anything that would happen.” His eyes find yours, abandoning the bracelet, “Why?”

Elysia shifts on her feet, “Do you need me for anything else?”

“Uh,” you pause for a moment, thinking. You don’t think so, tomorrow you’ll probably have trouble sleeping past ten, so you’ll be up and doing something. The interviews always have you nervous, no matter how well prepared your tributes are. And as always, this year is no exception, “I don’t think so. I’ll find you if I do.”

She looks at Finnick next, who gives her a slight head shake, “Goodnight, don’t exhaust yourself.”

The last sentence is directed towards you, “Goodnight, Elysia. Thank you for your help today.

She leaves, giving you and Finnick privacy. His eyes are back to being trained on your face. A part of you wonders if you should even bother with an offer like this, you’re sure that he would much rather stay here, or go wherever he used to when the festivities came around after the interviews.

You know you used to shut yourself in your room and be absolutely quiet. Quiet enough to hear every single thing that would happen outside of your door, sometimes extended to the living room if Elysia, Laurel and Pleurisy were gathered together. You couldn’t handle it. The night before the games is always the worst, it makes your chest ache at all the second thoughts that had run through your mind.

The what-if scenarios, the thousands of possibilities of what the arena could look like. The different ways you could die. Would it be in the bloodbath after one small mistake? Would it be by the hands of your allies after realizing they were stupid to invite a fifteen year-old to join them? Would it be by your former ally and friend, Finnick, to get you out of the way?

Even trying to project the image of you winning the games didn’t work. You were overwhelmed and anxious and completely unknowing of what your future would be. You didn’t want to end up like all those other kid tributes that end up dead after a few days. You didn’t want to make the same mistakes that you used to make fun of back home.

You can’t imagine how that’s going to go for Annie and Marsh, who volunteered to be here. You know you would be regretting it about now, especially since they’re so close to the cut off age. They could be back home, with their families. But they’re here instead, about to be thrown into an arena to fight for their lives.

This apartment is a cage to tributes, you’re lucky that it doesn’t extend the same way to victors.

“After the interviews, the group and I normally go and hang out around the festival.” you uncross your arms, placing them on the table behind you to lean back, “We eat at a nice restaurant, I normally watch them get drunk. You can come with, if you want.”

Finnick doesn’t say anything, face relaxing for a moment. Maybe he thought you were going to say something else? You stop leaning against the table, “You don’t have to go. They’re not your friends, I just thought I’d offer.”

“Why do you go out with them?” he asks, eyebrows drawing in, “You don’t seem like the type to go out there anyway.” he presses his lips together, “Actually, you don’t really intermingle with the Capitol unless you really have to.”

A couple of things come to mind, one by one. The first one is that Finnick has obviously been paying attention to you over the past couple of years. He just gave that away with telling you how your own mannerisms are. However, he clearly doesn’t follow you that closely, because you go out a lot more when you have the time. The other mentors are a getaway when you’re feeling particularly in your head.

The second thing is how his whole demeanor seems to have changed after you told him he didn’t have to. Maybe it’s because you’re backpedaling, but it’s not because you don’t want him there. You know that you’ve been taking up his time over the past couple of days, which has been conflicting with his needy Capitol schedule. You wouldn’t blame him if he just wanted to be alone or something.

The third is how he’s redirected it to you, not answering the question. Normally people will assure you that they’ll go or they have plans before asking you something like this. You don’t want to say he’s getting defensive but it’s hard not to.

Your voice is a lot quieter, a lot softer than you expect to come out, “They’re my friends, Finnick. And they make me feel normal again.” you squint for a moment, and then let out a sigh, “If you don’t want to go, you could’ve just said so. Forget I said anything.”

You slip away, Finnick doesn’t say anything. When you get back to your room, you silently peel off your clothes and get dressed into something more comfortable. You have a feeling that you’ll sleep pretty soundly tonight, considering how exhausted you are. You drop your ring into the small bowl on the bedside table, and then roll over in bed until you’re comfortable.

--

You wake up a little after ten, but don’t leave your room until eleven. The dining room is empty, your tributes have already eaten and are experiencing their own version of chaos inside of their bedrooms with the prep teams. Who knows where Finnick is, after what happened last night. And Elysia is probably off with Pleurisy and Laurel since she has the free time to, and you told her that you wouldn’t need her at all this morning.

You don’t eat much, a little hung up over how you left things last night with Finnick. It’s hard not to think about it, and the mistake you made with your choice of words. Not only did they come out more mean than you intended, but you’re also pretty sure you just ruined whatever progress you’ve made over the past week.

You don’t know if you can stay inside of the apartment all day today. It’ll still be a few hours before Annie and Marsh are ready to be brought to the stage. Until then, you can just disappear and come back in time to go. You decide to go with this, heading back to your room.

You shower, let the machines take care of your hair. It goes from wet and tangled to dry and smooth. You take your time with styling it, after being with Beth for this many years, you’ve learned a thing or two. A majority of your hair is out of your face, you’ll be sure to let it down later. Sometimes during the interviews, the cameras will pan to the mentors or stylists depending on the question.

You brush your teeth while finding what you want to wear. A pant suit could be nice, but you have a feeling that Laurel is already going to go down that path. Still, you can’t help but to run your fingers over the beige and white fabric. The only other real option you have is a dress, but they’re tricky and there’s certain rules you have to follow when wearing one.

You settle for the suit, carefully putting it together one item at a time. White high-waisted underwear that doesn’t show the seams through the pants, a matching bra. You go with a v-neck white shirt, since it’s not going to be seen after the blazer is buttoned. The slacks just barely stop at your ankles, you pull out new white heels that don’t go super high.

In the bathroom, you think you look sophisticated. You think that you might even keep your hair up the way it is, since it doesn’t really matter anyway. You apply the silver jewelry that you think will go with the outfit, and spare a lot of rings so that you aren’t clunky.

Makeup is the hardest part, so you end up calling Leo to come and help you. He’s impressed with the way you look, and works quickly so that he can get back to Annie. By the time you leave the apartment, you’re practically skipping in confidence. You take the elevator down to the lobby, a place already in mind.

Coincidentally, your friends are already gathered in the lobby. Cashmere notices you immediately, a smile spreading over her face. The others look over too, but Wade isn’t as thrilled as the rest of them. They’re dressed just as nicely as you are, you guess you just caught them on their way out too.

“Hey! Long time no see.” Cashmere greets, you snort and settle between Gloss and Enobaria.

“Hey, what are you guys up to?” you smile.

“Pre-gaming.” Gloss says.

“Pre--huh?” you look between them, they let out a small laugh, “The interviews are that torturous for you guys?”

Enobaria nods, “Yeah, I’m tired of sitting through them.”

“Can’t blame you. So, you’re going out to a bar?”

“Something like that.” Gloss says, “Want to come along?”

You tilt your head, giving him a face, “I am not going to drink.”

“Then don’t!” Cashmere grins, “You coming along is going to be good enough. We’ll be back before the tributes are done.”

��Promise me.” you point at her.

She uses her finger to draw an x over her heart, “I promise.”

“Alright, let’s go then.”

They cheer, you laugh and follow behind Enobaria and Wade, making a line with the Ritchson siblings. They place you between them so that you’re more included, and this way they won’t be tempted to fuck with each other. The last time you all hung out before the interviews--or anything important, for that matter--they had to have a last minute costume change because there were rips and dirt smeared everywhere.

Unlike them, you’re wearing light colors, so you’ve got to be extra careful when it comes to touching anything. Gloss and Wade are wearing black, Enobaria’s wearing a dark maroon dress, and Cashmere has got a muted purple dress. You guess that Cashmere’s going to have to be careful too because the purple is kinda light.

They’re all pretty animated, fairly loud when they’re excited. You go along with conversation--which really doesn’t have a range. It can be about Enobaria’s boyfriend drama back home, or how Cashmere had to scold her tributes over their training scores. And since she started that topic, you decided to go ahead and ask questions about it.

“They were supposed to be prepared!” Cashmere rolls his eyes, picking at her nails slightly with a frown, “They told me that they’d been working hard in the gym and I believed them. The one year I try and slack so it doesn’t seem like I have a stick up my ass, and this is what I get.”

You breathe out a laugh.

“I’m serious! The tributes are always calling us names because of how strict we are, and then shit like this happens. It sucks that it takes a problem to prove to people that you’re right.” she looks at you, “Congrats on your tributes scoring nines, though. I can’t imagine how happy you guys were.”

“Extremely.” you say, “It’s fixed how they’ve been thinking for the past week, so thank heavens for that.”

Gloss shrugs one shoulder, you look over to him, “I bet we’ve lost sponsors.”

“Oh, don’t be ridiculous--” Enobaria glances over her shoulder at you three, “--they could’ve scored ones and they’d still end up with plenty of sponsors.”

“She’s right.” you say, shaking your head, “You have nothing to worry about. I’ll be lucky if we even get a couple since we’re not with you guys this year.”

“Which is a bummer, I like hanging out with you.” Cashmere sighs, she twirls a ring of her blonde hair around her finger before letting the curl drop. She looks at you, “We’ll still be friends no matter what happens in the arena, right?”

“Our tributes have killed each other plenty of times, Cashmere. And still, here we are.” you give her a smile, and then share one with Gloss, “You’re my best friends… except for Wade, he’s an asshole.”

He glares over his shoulder, he’s the exception to the group laughter that follows after your statement. It’s his own fault that he’s alienated. You’re half-surprised that he didn’t leave as soon as you showed up at the lobby.

Enobaria leads you all to an expensive bar, you vaguely remember going here before. It was only once, you think. And it’s because of the prices, the alcohol here is strong and expensive. You come here to get drunk, not to dance around the idea of being tipsy. Although, you wouldn’t think that initially.

The entire bar is made up of two colors: a gentle pink color, and pure white. Straight out of some sort of fantasy. And despite its expenses and the fact that it’s the day of the interviews, it’s full of people. For a moment, you’re sure you guys will have to be put on some sort of waiting list, with no empty seats visibly available. But Gloss knows the person at the door, and you all get led to a special room in the back.

Which looks nothing like it does out there. Sleek black couches, dark hardwood floors, minimalistic lamps and succulent plants on tables. There’s one clock on the wall, and absolutely no windows. Enobaria pulls the door shut behind her.

You sit on the second couch, the one that faces the tv better. With you sitting flush against the arm, Gloss sits on the other end. There’s still plenty of space between you two, so you stretch out enough to be comfortable. When you’re done, you’re still not touching him.

Cashmere picks the standing up menu off of the coffee table, flips it open and sits back. Enobaria sits next to her, turning on the television, which is defaulted to Claudius and Caesar. A part of you wonders if the people here watch anything else. They could have hundreds of channels, and yet they default to the news? Wade sits by himself in a distant chair, one leg crossed over the other.

If he’s trying to appear older than he is, all he’s doing is looking like an idiot. It’s going to be hard for him to redeem himself after the show he put on a couple of days ago. Talk about being classy.

“You guys hungry? Looks like they serve food.” Cashmere says, passing the menu to her right, Gloss takes it.

You lean into him, nothing really sparks your interest. Besides, you just ate, “I’m good.”

“Well, I’ll take whatever the hell a ‘Ritchson Siblings’ is.” Gloss says, face scrunching, “Why did they have to use our last name?”

“I bet it’s probably some fruity drink.” You smile slyly, earning glares from both of them. Enobaria’s laughing under her breath.

“I’ll take one too.” Cashmere says, taking the menu from Gloss, and then passes it to Enobaria.

“Do they have a Golding special?” She jokes, and then her eyebrows raise, “Oh shit, do they have all of us? Mine looks like a Bloody Mary.”

You lean forward, hand outstretched, “Give me the menu.”

“I thought you didn’t care.” Gloss teases, you mock him slightly, earning a laugh.

Enobaria hands over the menu, allowing you to get a good look at the menu. At the top is the name of the bar, which explains it all; The Victory Speech. Under it is a fine print on how the drinks are supposed to get you blackout drunk so that you don’t remember anything. And when people get shitfaced, they tend to talk about things they’re not supposed to.

It’s cleverly designed, they switch colors every year. This year’s theme is to support the female victors. When you ask about this, Cashmere says: “Misogyny.” And that practically sums it up.

Anyway, you go down the list. Victors before the fiftieth Hunger Games have a section called ‘Old Timer’s’ because they’re all over the age of sixty at this point. Under this section is Mags and Luther since they’re both pretty old. But it’s vague, and they don’t really name names.

However, after the fiftieth games, it starts with names. Haymitch’s is called ‘Blackout’, and you can’t imagine what that entrails. For all you know, there could be a fucking roofie to ensure you don’t surprise. It probably tastes like literal acid and poison. But knowing the Capitol, they likely found a way to make it taste enjoyable.

Anchor’s is called ‘King of the Sea’ but you also remember people calling it ‘The Sailor’. The drink is twenty different shades of blue, and the foam on top makes it look like the ocean. The ice is in shapes of boats, fish and tridents to make it as appealing as possible.

Enobaria was right about hers looking like a Bloody Mary. It’s blood red, but it doesn’t look like it has tomato juice, more that the alcohol itself is red. The ice in hers is milk white, and you recoil at the thought of it. The title to hers is ‘Bloody Mistake’.

Cashmere and Gloss share their own with ‘Ritchson Siblings’, which isn’t a very fun name, considering all the ones before theirs. If you were to retitle, you think you’d go with ‘Infamous’. The Capitol absolutely loves the hell out of them. Their combined drink is yellow, but it’s shimmery in the picture. And you were right about the fruit, because the fruit is the ice.

And then it’s you and Finnick, separate names and drinks but it’s tied together with a special font that says ‘Complementary!’ and right beside it is a discount offer if you’re ordered together.

His is called ‘Prodigy’, probably a jab at his age when you guys won. It’s completely see-through, you’re not even able to see a chunk of ice in the picture. It comes with a silver trident that sticks out of the cup, blades up. On the end of the points is a lime. The drink is likely brutal if it has an offer of a chaser.

And yours is called ‘Traitor’, which you can’t even be surprised about. It’s clever marketing though, because the appearance is a light blue, with white foam on top. The alcohol is shimmery too, the ice cubes shaped like fish. Sticking out the top is a gummy palm tree, you think. You just know that it’s going to be strong-tasting.

Finally, the last one that you least care about is Wade’s. The moment you read the name of the drink, you’re cracking up. You then remember what his personality was like in his interviews, which was full of intellectually big words to impress the audience and make him look smart. The name is probably the biggest insult, ‘Know-It-All’.

It’s a lime green, there’s chunks of something inside of it, you can’t tell what. Maybe it’s flavored ice? There’s no way to find out unless you actually drink it, and you think that you’d pass. Besides, the name alone is a dead giveaway that this one is going to be strong too. It’s probably a good representation of the whole bar, actually.

“Maybe I will have a drink.” You snort, holding it out for Wade to take. He silently slips it from your fingers and flips it open to read.

“That’s the spirit!” Enobaria says, grinning.

“Oh, great.” Wade rolls his eyes, folds the menu and tosses it on the table, “I’ll pass.”

“Kid needs to learn to loosen up.” Gloss mutters.

“I’ll go and get the drinks.” You push your rings back into place, “What do you guys want?”

“I’ll take my special.” Enobaria says, and Gloss and Cashmere agree on their own. It takes some convincing, but Wade eventually comes around to the idea of taking one of the older victor’s drinks.

You don’t really need to jot it down, so you promise them that you’ll be back in a moment and slip out of the room. The main room is a nice between of loud and quiet. You can hear the private conversations of others, but just barely.

And it seems as if it’s only gotten busier since you first came here. Must be a popular place to go before certain events. You can’t imagine what it’s going to look like after the interviews. Probably packed from front to back, and you can imagine them transforming it into some type of club. It’s got the capabilities of doing so.

You move your hair behind your shoulder, leaning up against the counter while you wait for the bartender to come around. You’re not the first here, and it doesn’t look like you’re going to be the last. If you were to take a guess, you think that The Victory Speech is going to empty out when the interviews come around.

As you wait patiently, playing with one of your rings, you feel a gentle pressure against your lower back, and then feel the presence of someone. Before you can turn, the person is leaning in, “Hey, what are you doing here?” It’s Finnick, and he’s speaking directly into your ear.

You look over your shoulder to see him leaned in close. He’s dressed as nicely as you are, and it looks like you think the exact same way. He’s in a brown suit with a white undershirt. Your eyebrows draw in, one of you will have to change this evening, unless he doesn’t mind matching with you.

You’re about to answer, but your eyes find that he’s got quite the audience that’s watching him. You wonder what he’s here for, and if it concerns any of these people.

Either way, you shrug slightly and try not to be too bothered by where his hand is, “I’m with Gloss and them since they wanted to drink before the interviews.” You give him a little smile, “I’m getting the drinks, do you want to join us?”

Finnick doesn’t answer your question, “Are you sure you should be drinking?” He asks, as if you’re the irresponsible one here. With him avoiding your questions, you must have done something to set him off like this.

Nonetheless, you shake your head, and turn so that you’re halfway facing him. Because of this, his fingers ghost your waist and he has to rethink his hand placement. He goes for your arm now. Why is he so touchy all of a sudden?

“I’m not drinking.” You tell him.

“What can I get for you?” The bartender asks. You give him a smile, listing off the drinks that everyone agreed on. Finnick doesn’t move, patiently waiting. The bartender leaves, but you know that he’ll be back around.

“You should be at the apartment.” Finnick says, there’s a slight frown on his face.

“Doing what?” You ask, face twisting, “Waiting for the tributes to be done? Why aren’t you there?”

He doesn’t get the chance to answer, you’re being interrupted. The bartender tells you that a waitress will come around to the back room to give you and the others your drinks. After that, you know for sure that he won’t be coming back.

One last time, you look at Finnick, “Coming or not?”

Finnick watches your face, pressing his lips together for a while, and then says: “Not.”

“I’ll see you later, then.” You say.

His arm drops, allowing you to go. You give him and the crowd one last glance, suddenly feeling weirded out that they’ve watched you the entire time. You get a couple of steps in to leave, and then stop. He said that he didn’t have anything to do today, didn’t he? Or did you only ask for after the interviews?

You turn slightly to see that Finnick hasn’t stopped staring yet. There’s a look on his face that you can’t shake. A secret message? Wordlessly, you find yourself extending your hand for him to take. This seems to be what he wants, face relaxing and fingers gliding against your palm. You squeeze his hand, pulling him along. He needed an escape, that’s why he approached you.

You bring him around to the back, free hand reaching for the doorknob when the door opens. Gloss is at the door, laughing at something the others must’ve said. He gives you a bright smile, “Hey guys.” and moves on without really acknowledging Finnick.

“Heading to the bathroom?” You ask.

“Yeah, I’ll be back in a minute!” He says, and then disappears.

You bring Finnick inside, he gently closes the door behind him. Now that he’s safe in here, you feel comfortable enough to let go of his hand. The other three victors in here are already leaned forward, making comments about what’s happening on the screen.

“Hey, Finnick.” Cashmere says, giving him a quick look, “You’re gonna have to sit on someone’s lap.”

“Gloss.” You and Enobaria say together, immediately laughing afterwards. Even Wade cracks up, rubbing his face slightly.

“I think I’ll pass.” Finnick says, you take a seat in your original spot, and then pat the arm of the couch, “Or you could try and squeeze between me and Gloss.”

He goes ahead and takes the arm of the chair. Gloss comes back a few minutes later with the waitress. She serves the drinks, Gloss pays for it all, and then you’re free to drink and watch the Capitol tv until you want to go.

It turns out that the drinks all taste different, with Enobaria’s tasting sweet with the aftertaste being sour. She ends up liking it enough to keep drinking. Cashmere and Gloss are obsessed with the fact that theirs tastes like cotton candy and french vanilla. The fruit that’s floating in their drinks are miracle berries, which turns anything sour into something sweet and sugary. Wade thinks his tastes like peppermint and chocolate.

You pick up yours, the Traitor, “This is going to be horrible.”

“You don’t know that.” Cashmere says, but even she looks apprehensive.

“Thought you said you weren’t going to drink.” Finnick says, you give him a look and hold up the glass for him to take, “This isn’t what I meant.”

“Too late, you dug your grave.” Enobaria sips on hers, already used to the sour taste.

Finnick sighs and takes a gulp of it. Then, his face twists and he holds out the cup as if there’s something wrong with it. You raise your eyebrows, “What’s the matter?”

“It tastes like saltwater.” Finnick says, and even smells it to make sure.

“Bullshit.” You take a sip of it, and find out he’s right. The salt aspect isn’t all that overpowering, thankfully. But it does taste like water, “Huh.”

You pull out the sour gummy palm tree, taking a bite out of it to find that it’s practically flavorless too. You’d bet all of your money that people tend to mistake the drink for water and that’s how they end up hammered. You smell it too, expecting it to have at least some aroma, but it’s bland. You set it on the coffee table.

“I think that one sip for each of us is enough.” you laugh, Finnick does too.

“It’s probably a painless way to get drunk.” Cashmere says, leaning forward, “Can I?”

“It’ll be you who gets alcohol poisoning.” you motion.

The drink gets passed around, with everyone being surprised that you two weren’t lying about it. By the time it’s back on the table, it’s almost gone. Cashmere shares her drink with you, but you’re very light when it comes to sips. Not because you’re afraid of ending up making a fool of yourself, but because the sugary aspect of the drink is making your teeth and the back of your throat hurt.

While playing games with each other, mostly trying to get to know Finnick more since they don’t know that much about him, you all keep track of the time. The atmosphere inside of the room easily lightens up, Finnick relaxes enough to constantly have a smile on his face. Your mentor friends are charismatic enough to keep a conversation going and to keep it from getting tense.

Even Wade seems to open up too, but you’re fairly sure that it’s his drink that’s making him do it. Either way, you all end up in stitches, red-faced and wiping tears from your eyes. At least you know that Finnick isn’t mad after last night.

“I’ve finished my drink.” Cashmere says, pushing her glass onto the table, “It might be time to go.”

Finnick glances at the clock, you think it’s about thirty minutes back to the Tribute Center, “Yeah, guess so.”

You yawn, stretching your arms. It feels good to stand from the couch after sitting for so long. The others place their glasses in the middle of the table to make it easy for clean up. You dust your clothes off, pick up the door card that’ll say the room is dirty.

“So, was the matching outfits intentional?” Wade asks, leaning against the wall while you wait for the others to be ready.

“Actually no, we’re just psychic.” you give him a slight smile.

“Right.” he rolls his eyes, it’s quiet between you two for a moment as you watch Gloss try and fuck up Cashmere’s dress. She settles for punching him in the middle of his chest, “I’d like to apologize for what I said the other day.”

You look back at Wade, “Just be careful next time. You’re lucky it was me, otherwise you probably would’ve had your shit rocked by some other mentor. They’ve got pent up frustration, and they’d love to have a justified reaction like mine.”

The others start coming your way, you open the door and slip the door card on the outside handle so that a waitress can see that the room needs to be cleaned before it’s used again. You find Finnick towards the back, but end up pulling him to the middle after Enobaria and Wade start to lead you guys out.

You wrap your arm around his, “Let me repeat what I asked last night,” you look at him, “Are you busy tonight?”

His face falls slightly, “I’m not supposed to be.”

“And going to a restaurant might change that.”

“Going out in general, but if we can find a place like this one--with a closed door and a group then it’s less likely.” he frowns, and bites his cheek, looking away.

“Are you going to get in trouble for today?” you ask, he shakes his head.

Outside on the street, you can see that things are beginning to get busy. You don’t let go of Finnick, just in case something does happen. It’s a good thing that you’re with others, though, because again, they easily lighten the mood and have you guys giving soft smiles and some comments if it’s really needed.

You all have to split up in the lobby. You give gentle hugs and wish them good luck with their tribute’s interviews. Gloss and Finnick have their own kinda moment, which you quietly joke with Cashmere and Enobaria about.

“You’re lucky that Gloss doesn’t have a crush on you, otherwise he would have challenged Finnick for the alpha male status.” Cashmere says a little too loudly, which earns a nasty glare from him. Cashmere initially suppresses her laughter, but you crack up and it’s all over.

You and Finnick take the elevator up, deciding not to change what you’re wearing and just be matching for one night for nostalgia’s sake. You make it back just in time, with Elysia coming out of the apartment, face lighting up when she sees the two of you. She quickly readjusts some stuff on the two of you, but stands off to the side in the end to wait.

Marsh comes out with his team first, dressed in navy blue and black. He gives you guys a bright smile, and then laughs slightly, “You guys twinning on purpose, or--?” He trails off slightly, but it only lasts a second before he’s laughing, covering his mouth. You and Finnick must’ve had the same reaction.

Annie comes out a couple of minutes later, wearing a seashell pink dress. The bottom of it is layered so that it resembles the inside of a shell, with spiked shoes and pearls wherever the prep team could fit them. She shines in the light, and the red on her cheeks is to exaggerate blush.

“Absolutely stunning!” Elysia starts, which triggers the other prep team to follow in her suit. You give an approving nod to Laurel, who gives you a slight smirk.

“You two matching on purpose?”

“For fuck’s sake--” Finnick breathes out a laugh, punching the elevator button.

“I think there’s time to change.” Laurel says.

“We’re good, thanks.” you shake your head, heading inside of the elevator.

One by one, everyone crowds in. Five prep team members, Laurel and Pleurisy, Elysia, you and Finnick, and Annie and Marsh in front. Elysia presses the button to bring you all down to the base floor. All the tributes are already lined up against the wall, dressed in their own fancy ways.

You stop the tributes a little bit out of the elevator, “Look at me.” they do, Finnick stops beside you, “You’re amazing, your act is unique, you’re going to blow away the competition. There’s no doubt about it, so don’t even worry. If you two get nervous, we’re all in the crowd. Find your favorite and talk to them like they’re your best friend. Got it?”

They both nod, and you give them a smile, straightening up. Finnick speaks next; “Just remember that you’ve already shown them you’re good at fighting. Now it’s time to show them that you’ve got a winning personality, and you do.”

“Take deep breaths, guys. You’ll do fantastic.”

Sitting in the crowd with the rest of the Capitol is always a weird feeling. You cross your legs and lace your fingers together while you wait for the room to fill. They’re always going to be nervous, it’s just what they do with it that matters the most.

“Do you guys know any restaurants that’ll have closed doors?” Finnick asks, leaning over.

You give him a look, “Finnick, we’re victors. All you have to do is whisper it and they’ll get us a private room. You have nothing to worry about, I promise.”

He smiles, “As long as you promise.”

The tributes come onto stage, allowing everyone to get their first looks at the competition. Some tributes are dressed more expensively, others are loose and laid back. Annie and Marsh are pretty much the standard when it comes to dressing up for the interviews. They represent their district in some aspect while also looking like themselves.

Caesar starts off with a few jokes to get the crowd in their regular mood, and then he’s introducing the girl from District One. You silently pick apart their personalities, she’s sexy and dangerous, and the boy isn’t as smooth when it comes to instincts. He nearly trips over a small crack in the stage, it’s a dead giveaway why he scored so low.

The girl from Two is bright, with big smiles and animated talking. She seems genuinely interested in conversation, you’d like to say that she’s going for a nice aspect, which will totally flip inside of the arena. The boy is brooding and quiet, hardly opening up at all. He’s absolutely huge too, bigger than Finnick for sure.

District Three isn’t all that important, they’re geeky, shy and stutter a lot when they try and answer. When Annie is introduced, she gives a cute smile and stops next to Caesar, and from the very beginning of her interview to the very end, she’s got the Capitol absolutely wrapped around her finger. So much so that the tributes behind her are rolling their eyes, fed up with it. At the very end, she curtsies and gracefully takes her seat, crossing her legs and leaning back smugly.

Marsh walks up with a wave and a grin. His first few jokes don’t land properly, but it doesn’t discourage him. His eyes find you and Finnick, you give him an encouraging smile. After that, he seems to find his footing, eyes occasionally coming back to you two if he needs reassurance. Once again, he’s swept the entire audience away, they want more when his time is up.

When he sits down next to Annie, he holds his fist out, and she bumps hers against his.

The end of the interviews come around quickly, and since neither of them have allies, they don’t have a reason to mull around the floor talking to others. You give Cashmere and them a wave before the elevator closes, and then suddenly everyone’s buzzing all at once over your tributes.

Annie immediately flushes red, Marsh taking all the compliments like a champ. There’s assurance that they’ll be remembered for a while because of their acts, and how there’s absolutely no way that they didn’t gain traction. Tonight, the attention is probably placed on them and their new perspective on interviews.

Dinner is loud and lively. Tonight’s meals are delicious and filling, but you and Finnick eat scarcely because you’ll be eating out with Enobaria and the rest of them in an hour or so. The avoxes bring out a giant three tier cake modeled around District Four. When Elysia takes the first slice, candy pearls fall out of cake, all varying colors. You guys go ahead and watch the interviews one last time, pointing out details you hadn’t noticed before and cracking up at Marsh all over again. Needless to say, they’re pretty proud of what they’ve done today.

Annie and Marsh part with whatever tokens they want inside of the arena. Laurel, Pleurisy and the prep teams hug them goodbye. Although, the stylists will be the only people seeing them tomorrow. You, Finnick and Elysia are left with the tributes, and you have a faint sense of deja vu. You’ve been here plenty of times before, after interviews with two tributes that you’re too fond of.

But unlike before, these two are special pearls.

Elysia is the next to say goodbye, eyes a little watery like they are every year. She’s not allowed to wish them good luck, or say anything nice. She mutters out the insult that she’s required to say, and then disappears into the apartment.

It’s up to you and Finnick to finish off strong.

“We’re on your side.” you tell them, “We’re always working behind the scenes to pull strings. Look for hidden meanings in things.” you fidget with the engagement ring, “You can always change your mind when it comes to allies. The careers offered you a place the other day, but we turned them down. You can use that to your advantage, if needed.”

“If you find yourself in sticky situations, act on your instincts and worry about the repercussions later.” Finnick says, “Sometimes it’s better that way, but not all the time. If you’re unsure of anything, it won’t hurt you to change. Whether that be eating, drinking, finding a place to stay--any of that. If a situation feels weird, then it is weird.”

“Find water first.” you say, opening your arms. Annie’s the first to take the hug, you squeeze her shoulders tightly, “Remember, these are your games. You decide the outcome here.”

You hug Marsh too, “Go to bed, order herbal tea if you have trouble falling asleep. You’ll need every wink you can get.”

“Thank you for everything.” Annie says.

“Thank you.” Marsh echos.

You give them a smile, “Thank me when you come back.”

“Yes ma’am.” Marsh jokes, him and Annie go up the stairs and to their rooms.

You let out a deep breath of air, pressing the heel of your hand to your head, “There was so much more to say.”

“It’s okay, (Y/n). You said so yourself, they’re smart.” Finnick elbows you slightly.

“I know.” you calm yourself slightly, and then stand up straight, “Alright, let’s go before they think we’ve ditched them.”

“Can’t wait to have a second dinner.” Finnick snorts.

“Get ready to pop some buttons.” you grin cheekily, “And maybe make a fool of yourself.”

--

REDAMANCY IS PART 2 OF A TRILOGY //MASTERLIST//

add yourself to the TAGLIST

@f1nal-g1rl / @starlight-selene / @neenieweenie / @amixedwitch / @acatalepsyy

[incorrect-coldwar]

I humbly request THAT SHIT WE TALKED ABOUT

RIGHT ON DUDE FKDLFFK

adler's detective-lookin' outfit in the starter pack needs a bit of love so here's a very tense/strained set of hcs. kinda. spicy just making that known lmao

this is also gonna be a long post prolly oop

- busted. not even to an outrageous play, no mole, no dramatic exit. the man chasing you had connected the dots and predicted your next move. you had to admit, russell adler was impressive. he had been the one to put your hands behind your back. to snarl in your ear that you were under arrest for the rash of breaking and enterings all over the city. pressed against the wall; it was hardly dignifying. your bark of irriation was ignored as you were pushed into the back of a squad car and rushed off to a precinct.

- alone at a table in a blank, grey room with your hands cuffed firmly to a bar in front of you was hardly how you wanted to be spending tonight. getting caught wasn't in the plan, but adler had been thorough and attentive. your thoughts wondered to what he usually did, on his nights. the door cracked open and your thoughts were quickly boxed up, focusing on the matter at hand.

- which was... once again, russell adler. a sharp laugh escapes your mouth as he moves to sit in front of you. speak of the fucking devil. though, up close, he looks much better than any of the other people who've stepped up to you. it's refreshing. new. dangerous. adler scowls, his strong features twisting in distaste. he's annoyed you haven't spoken. oh well.

- "anything you wanna say?" he finally demands. you tilt your head and shrug. commenting that cuffs hurt; nothing more. a little hungry too. that makes him angry, and you can tell by the way his jaw clenches that this game is one he's played many times. but he hasn't played it with you; and that's something you're curious to see happen.

- you lean back, keeping your gaze on him and not saying a word. adler kicks his chair back and ambles over to perch on the edge of the table beside you. for a moment you just look at each other. then he leans in, face inches away from yours. suddenly it comes crashing down, no facade, no charm. russell adler is just looking at you. you huff and the moment is gone. he growls and gets up off the table with a flourish, turning his back to you as he braces his hands on his hips.

- "you don't know shit," you tease. "not like you think you do." the look of anger he gives you over his shoulder makes you almost afraid. almost. and this only emboldens you further. legally, he can't hurt you. can't beat you into submission, not that he would anyway. there's nothing to lose. and it's all in from there, you poke and prod. teasing comments that send shivers up his spine that he won't yet acknowledge. he stays adamant at first, focused on the goal. but eventually his focus sways. his comments are shorter, more terse. and he's raking his eyes up and down your body with growing urgency. shifting uncomfortably. you've got him.

- "is there something bothering you?" you ask innocently. adler's teeth grind so harshly you can hear them across the table. the low, frustrated growl he emits next leaves you nearly breathless. "no," he grits out. "i've got a job to do." you say something about how he's not doing it well judging by how uncomfortable he looks. something inside adler cracks.

- he slams his hands on the table, curling them into fists as he looks at you with disdain. he's angry now, but the feral look in his eyes is sending you for a loop. despite the situation, you want more of this. more of him. though this wasn't part of the plan. it was about making him mad at first and it seems you've done that and done it well. along with something more. you like it.

- a voice crackles over a speaker somewhere in the room, and you feel your face flush red. adler doesn't look surprised, just mildly inconvenienced. rolling his eyes to side, he pushes the desk back, then storms out. and just like that you're alone again. to face the metaphorical music of the shitstorm you just started.

- russell adler, you think to yourself. this is going to be interesting.

[muthaz-rapapa]

Let’s talk TroPreCure! (^∀^ 🌺)

i’m so stupidly proud of this dumb pun “tropurikyua~”, hahahahaha

Last post of the year and wow is there are lot to be excited for!

I even had to make a list for the stuff I want to talk about and I’m sure I already forgot one or two things but we’ll get to them as we continue to float~ along the wave to February 28th, mmkay? :)

Now for what has peaked my interest so far. And yes, we have to talk about the following first:

1) HealPre the shortest Precure season??

Unless they plan for double features in February (which I doubt but you never know), HealPre is likely going to reach only 45 episodes long instead of the usual 48~50 before TroPre I’m using this shortening of the title for now so if there’s a better alternative, tell me and I’ll switch out begins its broadcast.

Understandable because the producers probably want to get back to their normal scheduling as soon as possible (toy sales, y’know) and I suspect pushing the start of the new season back by a month is the most they’re willing to compromise.

As for me, I’m quite happy about this since HealPre’s lost its hold on my attention a while ago so the sooner TroPre gets here, the better. Though the downside might be a scrambled climax and a rushed, underwhelming ending for HealPre (I dunno if it’s January’s titles that feel a bit messy or if the hiatus is still throwing me off) but whatever. We’ll refresh ourselves with the new blood Cures so it’s all good.

2) Tropical movie announced for Autumn 2021, no All Stars??

(source)

First saw this mentioned on Youtube somewhere but it’s all over the fandom forums by now. I mean, HealPre’s movie is set for March, the usual time slot for All Stars release. If Toei intended for there to be an All Stars in 2021, there’s no way they would announce the seasonal movie before it so speculations of them skipping it this year are probably true.

To squeeze it somewhere between March and October-ish would force them to readjust their budgets as well and I don’t think even Toei wants to go through that extra hassle after all the trouble the pandemic’s caused for everyone already. It’s just easier to resume All Stars in 2022.

That, and I think Laura being a major character in TroPre despite not having a Cure title (yet) would make for an awkward situation when the three latest teams gather so perhaps that’s also one of the reasons. But I’ll get back to Laura in a bit.

3) Cure Summer is a RAINBOW Cure

So god help me if I see anyone calling her a Pink Cure.

Yes, she’s the lead Cure for this season. NO, she is not a Pink Cure.

Look, even the official website has a rainbow overlay for her profile pic and text font while everyone else’s respective theme colors are a solid hue:

Therefore, RAINBOW.

In promotional material and merchandising, they’re probably going to advertise her primarily with pink bah and at worst, she might occasionally be labeled as a White Cure with multiple subcolors (her outfit is not pink-dominant) but definitely NOT. PINK.

...also, this goes without saying but f***yea, we finally got a lead Cure practically and unabashedly wearing the LGBTQ flag and you cannot tell me otherwise, Toei!

Own up to it! Declare Manatsu/Cure Summer as the Precure queer icon!

I’m not gonna stop yellin’ until you do! 😠

4) Laura = obvious midseason Cure is obvious

First of all, Laura is a babe. I already love her the best and she’s not even Precure yet. <3

Anyways, the set-up is pretty much in the description. Important main character who’s not a mascot, stated to have a self-confident personality and just speaks her mind (oooh, I like~ :D), magical/foreign being from another world looking for Precure to save her home, possesses her own special item(s), has aspirations to become the next Queen (so she’s a princess-candidate or something to that effect, I suppose).

We’ve seen various combinations of these traits in past midseason (and a few starter) Cures so nobody should be surprised when we all guessed that one of the Cures would be a real live mermaid.

The only question is why not just make Laura a Cure from the get-go if she’s introduced to us at the beginning (like Hime or Lala) and having a team of five with no unnecessary extra add-ons later on (like Smile).

Well, there’s a simple answer for that: formula.

Toei is afraid that if they don’t spit out some new animation sequence at the halfway and third quarter points of the show, the kids will lose interest and abandon the series altogether. Which means failed toy sales. Oh nooo... [/sarcasm]

...Yea. 

And this way they can also have Laura available in the Cure lineup for the next All Stars in 2022 instead of making her sit the fight out if we were going to have one in 2021. I’m convinced that’s gotta be one of the reasons. *shrug*

But ok, whatever. Her debut is gonna be later, that’s all. She’s a delayed Cure.  Midseason Cure, same difference.

Moving along to the more important stuff now like what’s her Cure name gonna be, y/y?

Well, knowing Toei, a translation of the term “mermaid” into another language is the most predictable route even though we already have a Cure Mermaid. Not like that ever stopped them from repeating words before (ex. Cure Happy vs Cure Felice). Though if they do go down that road, I hope they opt for the Spanish/Italian “sirena” and not the French “sirène” because the latter sounds too close to how Cure Selene is pronounced in Japanese. And, putting it nicely, we all know Japanese pronunciation of foreign words is as off kilter as can be.

Hell, even the the Portuguese “sereia” sounds aesthetic as hell so it’d be nice if they can just remember there are other languages that exist out there besides Japanese, English and French when making the final decision at the writing table! *stomps foot* >:/

Alternatively, “nereid” or “naiad” are good choices too but they remind me too much of Greek myths and Laura’s from the Grand Ocean which covers more than just a couple of seas (Greece is surrounded by three, btw) so...

I dunno. But whatever it’s gonna be, she’s definitely got a strong association with water and her powers will probably be based on that.

As for theme color, since there’s noticeably no blue or green Cure in the starter lineup, it’s likely she will take up that spot when she debuts around ep 20.

Pink is also open since Cure Summer, again, is technically not a Pink Cure and Laura’s hair and tail fin are hot and light pink respectively but looking at Laura’s design and concept, does anyone seriously believe that?

Her upper torso consists of aquamarine while the body of her tail is definitely some shade of cyan, implying they’re aiming for somewhere around the middle of green and blue on the lighter spectrum.

And yea, I’m aware that green and blue are considered exchangeable in some perspectives with how close some of their shades are to each other but officially, I think Laura’s gonna be grouped with the Green Cures.

Cuz of the hair. If Laura’s gonna keep it the same or a similar shade after transforming, that is. The Blues have always had cool-colored hair so putting Laura in with them might disrupt that harmony whereas if you put her with the few Greens there are (including Parfait), she’d fit right in.

I mean, we’ll see but that makes the most sense, doesn’t it?

On another note, I just want to say that I love how they added frills to her arms instead of letting her elbows go bare naked. It definitely makes her look more like a genuine mermaid than if she didn’t have them (remember, half fish doesn’t mean half the body :P).

5) Magical Items

Frankly, I’m tired of seeing the transformation device being a compact again even though one of the main motifs is make-up this season. But at least, as far as Precure compacts goes, the Tropical one is my favorite cuz of how cute and delightfully colorful its toy version looks! So I guess I’m okay with it.

The Heart Rouge Rod, though? ...I dunno. I think it would’ve been fine without that...straw (?) jutting out at the top. It looks weird, doesn’t it look weird? :S

As for the collectible clip-ons, I can live without those for the rest of my life. Yeesh.

Laura’s items, the Aqua Pot and the Ocean Prism Mirror.

Again with the portable, travel-size housing. *sigh* 😩

Alright, I can let this year slide cuz Laura (I’m so soft for her, omg) probably won’t be getting legs for 20 weeks so she’s got to move about on land somehow. But unless they’re really thinking about turning this idea of carrying your apartment around in your bag/pocket/purse into a reality (cuz that would be effin’ awesome), please be more creative with your toys.

On the other hand, I’m much more interested in the Ocean Prism Mirror but from what Kusyami (the Precure merchandise reviews I follow on Youtube) said in his latest vid, this is the ED dance item so don’t know if it’ll actually have an relevance to the story or not. But I did hear him mention it having something to do with the Queen as well and since Laura wishes to become Queen, maybe it’ll be important after all? Maybe it’s her transformation device?

That’d be super cool. Let’s continue the trend of the midseason Cure having a different transformation item than the starters. Honestly, we should alternate every other year or two but we’ve gone three seasons with all of them using the same henshin gimmicks up till HealPre and I just want a break from that.

6) Fin sleeves??

These look so impractical for combat so maybe it’s exclusive to group attacks.

And/or a sort of precursor to the super forms?

*GASP* Does that mean they all eventually turn into mermaids? 🤩

7) Yui finally became Precure!! 😭

lol, it’s all crack from this point on so don’t take it too seriously but man, after Yuni’s deceptive braids, I thought I wasn’t gonna see anything that reminded me of Yui for a while and lo behold, Sango.

kehehehehehe xD;

Though Yui might be closer to Minori in terms of personal interests (fairytales and storybooks).

8) Akira, the actual Onee-chan version

I didn’t think this when I first saw her but once I read “Onee-san” in her profile, there’s no saving you now. Sorry, Asuka. 😅

Also, damn, do her sandals make her feet look big! Compare them to the heels she wears as Flamingo. Are they even the same?! lololol

9) ...this sounds awfully familiar...

Translation:

Tokimeku Tokonatsu! [Exciting/Thrilling Everlasting Summer!] Cure Summer! Kirameku Hoseki! [Sparkling Jewel!] Cure Coral!  Hirameku Fuurutsu! [Flashing Fruit!] Cure Papaya!

Japanese reiteration:

Mallow/Mao: Pink no tokimeki! Lillie: Blue no kirameki! Lana/Suiren: Yellow no kagayaki!

….........

@Toei 

Care to explain yourselves, punks?! 

୧(ʘ ∀ ʘ ╬)

[lgcyonghwa]

happy anniversary!

warning: this post is LONG AF! next year i am so not gonna do this - will make a graphic or something instead - because i legit typed for hours. don’t feel obligated to read the whole thing - feel free to scroll down to the sections where you are mentioned. 

holy ravioli, i can’t believe legacy is turning one! the last year was chaotic for me real life wise and legacy provided a great place to escape and enjoy writing with my friends. i chatted with so many of you wonderful people and have no doubt i’ll be missing some on this list. if i happen to skip you by accident, just know i love you anyway.

both of my muses went through a lot. yonghwa i’ve had since the very beginning and his journey did turn out differently than i expected. i created him to be perfect on the outside, slowly rotting on the inside. he has a lot of insecurities that he refuse to acknowledge and a crippling greed for money...to the point i legit created a list of free stuff available at legacy and still track his earning. he ended up not deteriorating horribly as i expected due to having an overwhelmingly strong support system. dang it, y’all, i wanted to fuck up my character. 

as for daehyung, he’s proven to be the ticking time bomb comedic relief asshole that everyone can’t help but respect for not having his ass kicked out of the company already love - he’ll continue to be a pest and harass people that he find fancy in. career wise, i am surprised he is doing so well despite hating the world and most of the people in it. guess deep down inside he actually cares about acting and finds joy in it. one day, hopefully, he’ll be singing his own ost. 

i would like to thank our cute sara, who played yonghwa’s brother @lgcyoon​ and currently plays @lgcseojin and @lgchana​~ sara was one of the first people i plotted with at legacy and i really enjoyed the friendship between seojin & yonghwa. seojin was an adorable tsundere pupper and yonghwa is over-affectionate and secretly appreciated. they had their ups and downs and in season 2 of the future dreams, that really came out. i am glad they were able to work through their issues and i think that is why their friendship feels so believable to him. seojin also had a part in daehyung’s life...can we get that communal shower yet, buddy? yoon, though you are too busy to play him now, will always be yonghwa’s doting older brother. i don’t think i’ll put up that wanted connection again because yoon is so perfect and yonghwa already latched onto him with both legs and arms. 

second up, i gotta thank my girl gabby for always being there. @lgcparkdohyun and yonghwa’s brotherly bond is incredibly strong and in fact, one of my best plots to date. we’ve essentially plotted them out from diaper days and they are as close as two guys could be without screwing each other, really. we’ve also been here since the beginning together and high fives man, our boys technically both made it. 

@lgcxcharlie is yonghwa’s supportive girlfriend and she is so adorable. a much needed ray of light in his life. funny thing is that they met a long time ago, via bread. did charlie know that she’ll end up getting a boyfriend out of her kind bread donation? see, this is what happens when you feed a hungry cat - he’ll keep following you for more. now you are just going to have to keep him~

for my beloved rose who plays @lgcjude, @lgcjina and @lgcwon, i love youuu. with them on tour together and sharing a room, i hope jude is not annoyed yet by the fact yonghwa keeps on climbing into his bed. as for jina - hello, fellow season one winner, high fives. they might have to keep some distance due to opposite gender, but at least they’ll always have that respect for each other. now won, sorry, the devil is never letting you gooooooo. he’ll continue to harass you for years to come. 

@lgcseolmi​ + @lgcichika​ & @lgckit​ - my typo queen nam~ we haven’t known each other for very long but damn did you rise quickly on my favoritism list. i love you lots, even though you are a dork who can’t spell anything right! :3c we’ve threaded already with the girls and now i am waiting for the new baby boy!

my al is the best person for cat gifs ever. every so often, i’d get a cute gif and feel my happiness grow. in fact, like we talked before, you send me so many cat pics that i believe you are a cat and will treat you like one. pet pet pet pet! @lgcinsoo​ and @lgcyue​ are both great babies, but you know i have bias towards our insoo. he is such a kind, loving puppy and both of my characters appreciate him. one more obviously than the other. 

em, how the hell do you post so fast even though you got three characters? also, how on the earth have we managed to talk so long without doing a single thread together? oh wait, shoot, it is me isn’t it? @lgcaaron​ is still waiting on his starter and my ass typed this long af thank you note instead of that hohoho-

i still have so many boys i want to interact with for the project origin group but those i’ve already had a chance to thread with, i’ve all loved. our @lgcxpv​ is a wild child but so precious in yonghwa’s eyes. we’ll always have their shower scene to reflect back on. also, your precious max is one of dae’s only semi-acknowledged friends. our @lgcxhaneul​ is the sweet mandu that will keep on getting squished by his loving hyung. we love @lgcseul​ who deserves all the hugs and @lgcminjun​, who will definitely become one of yonghwa’s favorites. @lgcjiho​ & @lgcharu​ are both soft cute boys that i am still planning on hitting up more.

though we’ve only had one thread, i strangely really enjoyed the interaction between yonghwa and @lgceunho​. i feel like they still have more to explore and hopefully will find themselves together in a future event!

also jia, we’ve been around since the very beginning too. i miss writing together. @lgchyunjin​ should come and love on yonghwa more. ; v ; we are the early day boys ya knowwwww. i enjoyed chatting with you on twitter, can always count on you to be around liking people’s posts to show support. 

lately, i’ve also gotten to plot with @lgcsubin​, who is a sensitive boy with depth. i love his character and i hope to write more with you, nic! also, thanks for being around and asking what’s wrong whenever people are upset. i think it is so precious.

stef, i am so glad you joined legacy and see, it is fun, right? daehyung will continue to bully @lgcxjunghwan​ but he does it in an affectionate way, alright? love to lulu ( @lgcminseok​) & simone (@lgctee​) for always being there to chat about stuff~

jen, thanks for teaching me how to gif. i’ve enjoyed our chats via discord and we should do it again sometimes KEKEKEKEKE @lgcxjinah​ and @lgcxjongsuk​ both have their places on my character’s heart - i love them both!

here, i just want to acknowledge some of the people that dropped but still had a huge impact on yonghwa’s life. i don’t know how many of y’all will remember them, but back in the day, yonghwa had a best friend called kiyoung and a crush on yujin. when those two dropped at the same time, oh, that was a huge blow. thank them both for being a part of his life. also, jane was a heavy loss for me because i adore her quirkiness. bobby come back, you can blame it all on me. 

lastly, i want to thank all of the mods for their hard working maintaining the rp! thanks so much, legacy wouldn’t be fun without you! 

for the head admins, i have a few extra blurbs because we’ve been together for a whole year. for our admin l, you’ve worked hard. it is not easy to run events and i feel like i’ve definitely pushed you with some difficult questions before. i am glad we are friends and get to chat often about random tidbits. i am also happy you are taking time for yourself and taking care of real life concerns. your wellness is always the priority! character wise, i have a feeling @lgcmiso​ and daehyung will actually get along well~ 

marie because i can’t even remember what is your official admin letter OTL i just remember you as the mother of merlin and writer of @lgcxking​. it is not like i don’t like jin, but that king is the one i had the most threads with. i really love yonghwa and king interaction because in a place where everyone must be civil and friendly, their hate for each other is so damn refreshing. i still think five years from now on they’ll be friends, but not before trying to claw out each other’s eyeballs first over their smutty fanfics. sorry for keep harassing hyuncheol and calling him papi, please continue to feed me merlin content. he is the best boy. 

FINALLY admin g our grace you are so awesome. i can always count on you to hear me bitch for the two minutes before my angy fade and for last minute cramming. on the week before date lottery is due and i am wailing pathetically for my points, grace is always here to pull through! @lgchanbyul​ and yonghwa as on screen couple is actually pretty adorbs. also @lgcjaesun​, thanks for dealing with daehyung as a dorm mate. the devil is gone now but his influence will always be there

i have so many more people i want to mention but only so much time. just know i appreciate everyone. thanks for a great year, hopefully there’ll be many more!

[songsorter28]

Blackpink: The Album Review

Okay, this is the first time i’ve done this and the truth is i don’t know how, so i’ll just try my best.

First of all: I am a Jennie biased blink. That means I have no trustworthy sense of criticism when it comes to them and if you do, this is probably not the place for you. I will try to talk about this album with a sense of criticism, but sometimes, i’m just gonna like a song because it’s blackpink and y’all just gotta deal with it.

BUT, I am not afraid of saying i don’t like things that the pinks have said it to like, which is actually how i’m starting this review. So, if you guys are all about loving the girls and emotion and “think about how they must feel” this is a decision made by the girls, this place is also not for you either. I am a blink and i share a lot of love for those four women, but i am also a consumer of their work as artists. I will complain if I didn’t get something I thought was necessary as a viewer and listener for my money and attention to be spent. I will not, of course, hate on them in any way.

Ok, before anything:

1) English isn’t my first language, so I apologize for any mistakes. 2) Here, we’re gonna talk about the cover, pre-release single choices, writing credits, tracklist and my honest opinion about the album as a whole.

a) The Cover:

There’s not a lot to talk about but the fact that it’s gorgeous, but simple. I didn’t understand why a crown if the name was The Album (something unoriginal to be honest, but i’m not 100% against it) and there’s no reference to royalty throughtout the album besides maybe Jennie’s rap “didn’t want to be a princess”. I did find the cover visually pleasing tho, could be much more embarrasing.

b) Writing credits and Track List:

This one is quick. I’m extremely glad Jennie and Jisoo were credited as songwriters (Jennie as well as a composer) but Teddy gotta give Danny Chung to god. He hates rapper Jennie and he’s the reason Lisa doesn’t write. He’s always in charge of the raps so teddy gets confortable and Lisa doesn’t get a chance to write her own verses, which is something the sure thing cover showed us she can do. Also, he hates rapper Jennie to the point where she had to write her rap on the title track (wich is good, but, you know what i mean) and wasnt even given a chance to write more than 8 seconds. Melanie I hope this is the last time you were here. Loren you can stay. Tommy and Ryan yall were cute we had fun but it’s over let’s move one (seriously, these producers really made me appreciate Teddy more lmao pls sir never leave us). Okay that’s it. Now, to the track list.

I will be talking about the fact this shouldn’t even be called a full album on the My Honest Opinion About The Album As A Whole topic.

1. How You Like That

I say my opinion more detailed on the next topic but at at essence. Cute. A good opener to the album and what is to come, but too much of a bside to even be a pre release single.

6.5/10

2. Ice Cream

Again, my opinion it’s on the next topic. Cute song. Loved Chaennie’s high notes and wish i didn’t know english so the rap didnt sound that silly. Not as bad as blinks and non blinks make it out to be. 

6.12/10

3. Pretty Savage

I kinda also talked about that in the next topic lmao. It has everything a blackpink song should have. There’s been some controversy about Lisa “born skinny bitch” but Lisa was talking about herself since she has been body shamed through her whole career. She was right and she should say it. You’re entitled to feel uncomfortable but that’s just the thing she wasn’t talking about me or you. She was taking her pain and wearing like an armor. This was a diss track for the haters. Taking that away from her because of our own issues it’s kinda mistreating hers.

8.82/10

4. Bet You Wanna

Yes you guessed it right I talk more about it next topic. It’s a bop. Loved Jennie here. She has such a versatile voice I was very proud to hear her. And Cardi was also good. Just hope Lisa will get her rap part live cause she didn’t have much lines here. But I loved Jenlisa’s brigde. Rosé’s adlibs peak perfection and Jisoo’s chorus and english that’s what i’m talking about. The chorus can be a little repetitive and it kinda ends a bit suddenly but it doesnt bother me much.

8.37/10

5. Lovesick Girls

WHAT TO SAY ABOUT THIS MASTERPIECE OTHER THAN BEST BLACKPINK TITLE TRACK? Love that for me. It was so different than anything they’ve done so far, the lyrics were AMAZING, the message behind it also, the visuals in the MV, storylinne, RAPPER JENNIE OMG, she got the most memorable line “didn’t want to be a princess, i’m priceless” i love her tf the shade to the yg princess title and her scene in the car and in the mental hospital(will not touch on the controversies cause that was annoying) also Lisa’s rap/singing with a flow in the begining her voice OMG I WAS SHOOKEDT. Jisoo’s high note in the brigde? Rosé?? perfect.

10/10

6. Crazy Over You

Rapper Jennie for the last time with a 8 second rap again but LET’S BE POSITIVE. A bop. I loved the i. went. crazy. over. you. I love the lyrics. It bother a bit this much english but it’s bp’s idendity so i’m fine with it.

8.5/10

7. Love To Hate Me

This was a predictable song in the best possible way. Easily one of their best songs. There’s honestly nothing left to say. Also. Lisa’s rap. Maybe Danny Chung deserves some points. It even felt like she was a feat in the song like her flow yall just perfection.

9.4/10

8. You Never Know.

Great song I left with depression.

I like how this album talks with haters and blinks, it really shows a different side from the pinks. Only a few know the emotion Jennie starting off “but you never know unless you walk in my shoes [...] cause everybody sees what they wanna see, it’s easier to jugde it than to believe”. It was written by Loren, a close friend from the girls and the boy who’s Jenlichaeng  boyfriend in the LSG’s MV and Bekuh Boom, a producer who’s been with them for really long, but if anyone got a conspirancy theory that they were involved in the songwriting process of the song, sign me up. You don’t need proves. I believe you. ALSO JISOO GOT MOST LINE ON THIS ONE and we got singer Lisa. After a while, it become my favorite song from the album. Now, it’s my favorite song from their discography. Debate your mother.

9.62/10

c) Pre-Release single Choices: 

I can’t stress about this enough. Whoever was in charge for the single choices needs to go to jail. Not that HYLT is bad (at all) but comparing to the rest of the songs, it look MUCH more like a powerful bside than Love To Hate Me and Pretty Savage ever will. I will lecture later how Pretty Savage was the perfect choice to first release single, just wait. Now, to the controversial Ice Cream. To be honest, i found the song super cute and i think the MV was one of their best. It was different and refreshing, love that for me. But the whole sequence of events that turned out to that disasterous twitter timeline, with constant attacks to the girls especially Lisa over things they cannot control such as line distribuition and a sabotage from antis on yt comment section, was something I kinda already saw it coming. Ice Cream is Blackpink’s most successful single to date, but it was a bad choice from the start (I will talk about that in a second). For starters, YG decided not to promote the song well. While announcing the single, they gave us a poster with pictures from a summer package released months before. And each week they kept doing that, only using actual teaser photos in the release week. The hype was pretty much out. I can’t say my timeline is 100% blink because i have way too many fandoms that i’ve been following for longer than i’ve known kpop, but compared to the HYLT hype, they were pretty down and that’s on YGE. Also, ever since coachella, it’s been antecipated by fans and artists the possibility of a Blackpink x Ariana Grande (one of the most popular singes these last couple of years). The idea of an Aripink collab got blinks (who were already with an eye wide open after Blackpink was seen with Tommy Brown, Ari’s basically oficial producer, who has been producing for her ever since her second album and was reponsible for many hits of her latest project, Thank U, Next, such as 7 rings and Thank U, Next) even more hyped when YG announced (one of those old photoshoot posters. I’m sorry I will never let that go that company is so trash) that Blackpink’s second release was going to be a collaboration with a western artist, and Ariana herself like Jennie’s instagram post about the next single. I cannot put in words the reaction of my twitter timeline when YG confirmed that the collab was actually with Selena Gomez. 

Now, on a more personal note. 

You see, I actually like Selena. I like her songs, besides the critics. Perfect is pop perfection. Waverly Place is the best disney show ever since That’s So Raven. But, to a collab made to the US market, and besides the success of Rare, Selena isn’t a sales force like Adele or Taylor Swift, nor a streaming force like Ariana Grande. Nothing takes my theory that this was supposed to be an aripink collab but, for some reason, she dipped and then interscope (blackpink us label and selena’s label) picked her. Selena showed us a good time and promoted the girls more than YGE did but, it wasn’t a surprise when the song didn’t get a top 10 (a top 13 is really good tho, don’t get me wrong). 

Now back to the story telling

Selena was more than a feat, she sang the whole damn song, getting more vocal lines the the entire vocal line. She’s only a few seconds behind Lisa, who got the most lines in general. I understand that it is a collab, but this is the girls’ single. Why would they want to listen to them for only 16 seconds, the amount of time Rosé got? That set a bunch of solo stans (something that exists more in this fandom than everywhere else) to boycoitt the release, a huge fansite even taking out their funds for the full album (that was low, even for a solo account. JisooBar, you aint seeing heaven). Did i think it was a little of overeacting? As someone who’s an army that had to handle Not Today’s line distribuition, and especially since we’re talking about the main vocalist, someone who will for sure have more lines in the future (as she did), kinda. But, like i said, it was a bomb getting ready to explode at any minute. If it wasn’t that it’d be something else. That being said, NOTHING will ever justify the nastyness y’all did with Lisa and even Jennie’s comment section. Nothing. That was ridiculous even for solo stans. BUT for people who got worried about Lisa’s lack of posts after the release, don’t worry. She didn’t post a lot because Thailand is going through some stuff and I don’t think she has YGe’s permission to talk about it (when I catch the ones in power on that company istg). 

Wow, that was long. At essence, it  was a bad choice for several reasons, but i enjoyed the song a lot. Can’t wait for the live performances with chaesoo’s lines.

Now, back to HYLT. It was greatly promoted, it stopped Zico’s (huge in korea) releases and a bunch of other big artists in South Korea. Got 7 Perfect All-Kills and would’ve gotten more than 12 if the charts weren’t reforming at the time. It also broke a lot of records, and repeated Sour Candy’s position on the bb100 on #33. It’s another very Blackpink song that  I enjoyed but kinda aged. Many non blinks didn’t like it but it’s not like they were ever going to admit they liked a bp song. They’re annoying. The song’s biggest problem is probably the 2015 edm in the chorus. Like. Teddy. You gotta let that go. It’s time. He kinda heard us in the album. But, these kinds of songs are very liked by the general public, especially the korean one. An interview was made asking the general public if blackpink should change concepts and they said a bit fat no. So that tells what you need to know. And that it why i think Pretty Savage should have been the first pre release single. 

Okay, let me tell you another series of event. Back on november 2019, when we were starving because YGe does not like money, BlackpinkBar, a big fansite, payed trucks to be sent to YG building during a whole day demanding for better treatment to Blackpink. You can find all the demands online, but at essence, when it came to music related, blinks always mention: Jisoo’s lines, screen time and blackpink in your area, Main Rapper Jennie, Lisa dance break, Rosé’s high note. On HYLT, we got nothing. And everyone had to shrug it off saying it was just a pre release single, BUT it would be better hyped by blink and the hype to the second pre release would’ve lasted longe if PRETTY SAVAGE, who has basically all of that, was the pre release single. It would’ve assured us of so much. Jisoo said bp in your area twice, she RAPPED, she was singing, she could’ve had more screetime and center time especially bc she’s on all chorus. Jennie Main Rapper would go back and we wouldn’t have to be blue balled (which caused the ice cream meltdown)every single release and only having to wait till the title track and only to have a 8 SECOND RAP. I won’t talk about that now. Moving on. Rosé wouldn’t get a high note, but she would’ve gotten the brigde all to herself and the next pre release single, bet you wanna (wait for it), she would get those incredible adlibs. And Lisa’s dance break. Not only this is bp’s most danceable song and has a bunch of lisa’s raps, it also has jennie’s outro, where for a least 20 seconds lisa could’ve thrived. Yall we were robbed.

Now, real quick, back to Ice Cream. In a perfect world (or just a world where YG’s current ceo) had brains, if they wanted a collaboration to show the pink side of blackpink, with a poppy song and sassy lyrics, the artist not to be in the whole song, and to have an artist who would driven attention from the locals and is a big streaming force, THEY WOULD’VE CHOSEN BET YOU WANNA. My biggest problem with bet you wanna is Lisa’s lack of lines, which could cause stuff and well we just miss her they could have added a rap even for 8 seconds, BUT, seeing her all around pretty savage and knowing she’s gonna have Cardi’s rap during live performances would cool things down. Since we were in the middle of a pandemic, instead of a mv like ice cream where they had to do it separately, they could’ve done something like IU’s eight. A huge part in animation and a few with people. Literally YG why are you so dumb. Bye.

d)  My Honest Opinion About The Album As A Whole:

I did some math (lol) and my rank for The Album is 8.4. It’s easily one of the best releases from this year and I loved it so much, but something were left to be desired and i think i could pass everything and just turn a blind eye at things, except one: the fact we waited for 4 years, watched all ggs and yg groups getting comebacks last semester and only got 8 songs. Loona is releasing a mini album with that amount of songs. Stray Kids and BTS’s mini albums are longer than that. It was bad enough KTL had 4 songs and a remix (a joke) with 2 songs lacking raps and no rapper jennie only for them to carry YG’s dirty name after what their protected boys did. I legit hate it here they didn’t even had 30 minutes, their longest song wasn’t even 4 minutes. Also, before anyone says anything about the girl’s interview about quality over quantity. I’d like to say that i understand them having that when it comes to have one comeback a year and i’m honestly okay with that. But their first full album? 8 songs? Are you kidding me? Like I said, I’m a consumer. I refuse to receive this half assed excuse about quality over quantity when they had more than enough time to produce and write more than 8 quality songs? what, is impossible to write more than one song per moth? these songs have formulas, they can be made more than 8 times. A blackpink album its more than a thousand reals here. That 90% of a sallary. And please don’t come with the “if you don’t want it just don’t buy it” “you can just unstan them” bc that’s not the case. I love their songs. I love the girls. But I’m a consumer of their art and if they want to be takend seriously as artists, they gotta do more than 8 songs on a full album. It’s unfair to anyone that isn’t a diehard fan willing to sell out an overpriced photobook in hours. That’s not the only kind of fan blackpink needs. they need the store locals, the people who are not on twitter or tumblr or instagram. Cause those locals are gonna stay like they stayed with adele and taylor swift. stan twitter is much more likely to leave them with time.

Side note: I’m tired of commenting on rapper Jennie so I’ll just say Jennie deserves better than 8 second raps as the main rapper of the group. That doesnt mean I want Lisa to not rap or to Jisoo not to sing, as many will say bc apparently that’s what people hear when we say main rapper who trained for 6 years to be a main rapper should rap on at least most title tracks even if not on all songs.

But yeah, that’s it. Besides the unfortunate final note, I loved The Album and now Blackpink it’s my second most listened artist of all time. They were top 13 before the album.

[thehollowprince]

When i was 9 years old I loved the first Iron Man movie (mostly because of his snark) and when I found out that there was gonna be a second one, I watched the trailer and thought: What a douchebag. I never watched a Marvel movie and until the Avengers a couple years ago and became a Steve stan. Never Iron Man again though and I never regretted that, even when tumblr kept shoving Tony wank in my face. And FINALLY I have realized that there are others who share my opinion. So thank you for that.

Well, for starters, thank you for making me feel old, because I was nineteen when IRON MAN came out in theaters.

But I understand.

When I first saw Tony in IM, I thought he was a bit refreshing when it came to superheroes. He wasn't some paragon or moral goodness and he didn't rely on his Tragic Backstory™. It was nice to see a hero who was cocky and full of himself, a little more relatable than some of the heroes who had graced the silver screen by that point.

The problem was that, come the sequel, they backtracked on that, trying to give him some Angst™ in the form of his arc reactor poisoning him and the shitty relationship with his dad. From there it just spiraled out of control, especially post-Avengers. Too many people latched onto the concept of him "being human" and ran with it, making it an all-purpose excuse for every horrible thing he ever does. And just now I'm realizing that a TV show that I loved used a similar excuse for a character ("Some of us are human!") every time he did something that cast him in a negative light. No wonder I hate it so much.

I'll also fully admit that I really latched onto Steve during THE WINTER SOLDIER and his subsequent film appearances, as well as retroactively via THE FIRST AVENGER. He represented a lot of what I like about the superhero genre as well as just being a decent human being, which is more than I can say for his comic counterpart. Didn't hurt that he was played by Chris Evans. It wasn't until ENDGAME that I realized I was falling into the same trap of character-blindness that Tony stans can't seem to escape.

I'll always be thankful that I was both a comic and an X-Men fan before the MCU started, because otherwise I might not know what good superheroes are actually like.

[atrainernamedradish]

Top 5 Favorite Rivals

Least Favorite list: https://atrainernamedradish.tumblr.com/post/190290513502/top-5-least-favorite-rivals

Top 5 Favorite Rivals:

5) Barry [Diamond & Pearl; Platinum]

I think people can agree with me when I say Barry either needs to lay off the sugar and caffeine, or needs some Adderall, because holy fuck he was so damned hyper it was unreal! And before someone gets mad at the joke let me remind you that there is some dialogue where he tries to count to ten, and proclaims he can’t even sit still to do so! Like sweet Lord Barry calm the fuck down lol!

Jokes aside, I thought Barry was a solid rival. He wasn’t mean-spirited about being so or always trying to act better than you about it. Sure, he was cocky, but he eventually learned that he had to put his ego aside to actually learn how to be that much of a better trainer. His teams were pretty solid too. He wasn’t the hardest person to face, but he wasn’t a pushover by any means. Sometimes his hyperness was a bit annoying, but nothing that bugged me for too long. He was a good rival to have when you’re trying to deal with the headache that is the other rival that is your boring opposite gender.

4) Marnie [Sword & Shield]

Marnie is an interesting character. When I first saw her in the reveals for Sword & Shield I thought she was going to be this arrogant punk (I blame the black leather and spikes :P), but when you actually meet her that isn’t the case. She’s actually someone who doesn’t have that much confidence in herself, at first though, but as you progress through the game she builds up to that. In fact, the only thing she was confident in was not taking over her brother’s gym and setting out to do her own thing. Besides believing how confident she was going to be, I was also expecting Marnie to have this annoying personality (but I feel like that was due to Team Yell being there more than anything), but once again she blew my expectations out of the water! Her personality was sweet and likeable and it was refreshing! Her team was actually a pretty powerful one and was actually fit her aesthetic! That’s actually rare for a rival in this series if I’m being honest… From her aesthetic that mixes hard and soft (which yay the girls will be getting her outfit which I adore and can’t wait to have on my alt character!), her sweet shy personality that eventually gets some quiet confidence behind it, and her battle prowess, I enjoyed her as a rival as opposed to the other two who either got shafted by the overdone formula, or the one rival trying to be the OG rival who we’ll never truly get back.

3) Blue (Green) [Pokemon Red & Blue (Green); Yellow (Pikachu Edition); FireRed & LeafGreen; Let’s Go Pikachu & Eevee]

And speaking of the OG, here he is: Blue (or Green if your Japanese). Many Pokemon games after the originals have tried to replicate this character, and haven’t quite made one that is up to snuff. This character is a perfect blend of cocky asshole and a strong trainer. You almost liked how much smack he talked then enjoyed kicking his ass after the fact, and doing so wasn’t always an easy feat, even in the remakes (excluding the Let’s Go series since he isn’t your rival in that). He had almost the perfect team not only against your starter but to also counteract your team members that made up your team for said starter’s weaknesses. That’s why kicking his ass was all that much sweeter because he didn’t just hand it to you. He made you work for that victory. While I’m not necessarily someone who is looking for a rival that has to be an elite trainer or anything, it’s nice to not have a friendly rival who talks a big game but is always going to face defeat, and quite easily and quickly too, by your hands. There have been some other rivals that have been pretty tough to deal with, but not as challenging as Blue will ever be… There’s a reason you will find this asshole on almost every top rival list. He earned that spot. Because despite being that smack talking asshole that you have to work extra hard to beat… he is kind of charming. He’s the rival you love to beat.

2) Bianca [Pokemon Black & White; Black 2 & White 2]

I want to make this clear with about my opinions on characters in Pokemon: they don’t have to be the strongest to be my favorites or even liked for that matter, and Bianca is one of those characters as far as battling prowess is concerned. I like Bianca for her character arc as well as the character herself. I think this character gets a lot of hate for no reason other than her not being a strong trainer, or not automatically being this confident cool character that should be ready to adventure which is honestly sad…

For me, Bianca is a very relatable character who in my honest opinion is a very underrated character. She is a character who wanted to do something with her life, but wasn’t sure how to start or go about doing it. Her first attempt is by doing what all the other characters her age do and that’s to set off on her own Pokemon journey, even if she wasn’t exactly ready. As her story progresses she comes to realize that that isn’t for her, and honestly not every person in that world is going to go out there finding out that this is for them. Not to mention not everyone who sets out on their Pokemon journey is going to find themselves being these super powerful trainers who are always going to confidently beat everything in their path. Bianca getting picked on by Team Plasma was not all that farfetched. She was a brand new trainer experiencing new things making her an easy target for them. Your character could have easily been just as privy to Team Plasma. Generation V showed that anyone was susceptible to them. But anyway, I’m going a little off topic, Bianca did struggle, but her struggles eventually took her to her calling: being a professor’s aid. Which fits her and overall is a good story arc for her. She’s not your typical rival of going around trying to one-up you and getting on your nerves trying to do so. She’s a friend, a main character, and unlike the typical power hungry overused rival archetypes, she grew and I was happy for her.

Not to mention, Bianca is one of the first few characters in the series to actually really… notice that there is this big new world around you and it’s something to explore taking it in as opposed to rushing into filling the Pokedex or doing the Gym Challenge, and honestly that’s refreshing for a character! Because you cannot tell me that if you were to leave your home setting off on a journey traveling to many new places that you’d overlook everything? Probably not. You’d want to explore all the new sites. That’s the whole point of an RPG is to explore. I felt more immersed in Black & White than most Pokemon games because I had a character in my journey to make it feel like it was actual exploration instead of bare bones places with much to be had. Unova, as to other regions, had a lot more sightseeing options and a lot more to explore. Unova just felt big, kind of like Johto and Kanto for GSC/HGSS. Just, thanks Bianca for feeling like a real person, instead of one-dimension rival who either wants to kick my ass or is so boring that I wish they were annoying lol…

1) Wally [Pokemon Ruby & Sapphire; Emerald; Omega Ruby & Alpha Sapphire]

It’s like I stated with Bianca: a rival for me doesn’t have to have battle prowess to be liked by or be a favorite for me. Not gonna lie, I wish Wally had a better team, but unfortunately Wally falls under the earlier formulas of forcing trainers to use entirely new Pokemon instead only peppering their teams with a few new ones, but whatever… 

Wally has one of my favorite rival arcs. He is a sickly kid who wants so badly to be healthier and have a Pokemon of his own so he could one day to set on his very own Pokemon journey like the other kids who have probably left by now on it. Nicely enough your character is there to guide and watch over him as he finally catches his very own Pokemon, even if later you were there to kick his ass a bit later on… While I do like how ORAS gave more facial expressions for this character to make you more sympathetic to him in the story… I wish they hadn’t had him show up after your battle with your dad to keep that mysteriousness of him actually progressing along side you on your Gym Challenge (yes I know you could read the gym signs to see that he’s doing it, but no one thinks to read those, let’s be honest!) before running into him at the end of Victory Road, but oh well. Honestly I wish they had had him in the Champion spot, kind of like what RBY did with Blue, but instead of knowing your rival was one step ahead of you as always you had the sickly kid you thought you sent home after a crushing defeat there instead who actually overcame it and decided to meet you there to prove he did so.

Overall Wally was an underdog and I like characters like that. You don’t expect him to become much more powerful after Mauville. He takes his defeat and he does his best to make up for it by having it push him. He wants to be stronger to prove to everyone, but more importantly to you, the person who was there to witness his journey from the start, how capable he was. Yeah, you do inevitably beat him, which is the fate of the main player in Pokemon, but when you do it you don’t think “aw man I beat another weak rival” or “hah! I beat your smug ass again!” you think of how it was a fun battle and a great progression in a well developed character’s story. And even then, Wally doesn’t take the defeat as a loss, but more as a way to push himself even further. He sees losing as a way to overcome something as to trying to cover up his frustration or to go packing home, and that is an admirable trait. Plus the final battle with him on Victory Road was pretty epic with that new theme of his as well as made me a bit sad because I had to beat him and all he did was smile and thank me… Made me want to cry lol… But that’s why Wally is my favorite rival. He has a great character arc, personality, and he makes me feel so many emotions that I feel like other rivals or characters couldn’t give me… Good job Wally you will always be the rival. 

[boystownhq]

[ R-E-S-P-E-C-T Find Out What It Means To Me. On Communication! ]

Recently, I’ve been noticing a trend of people communicating out of character in the vaguest way possible, or alternatively being aggressive to the point of turning people off. I’m here to talk about the happy medium that helps us communicate our wants, goals, and limits. And to remind everyone of a few key things to always keep in mind when writing with other people in a group setting.

There’s also plotting and letting go of plots. Sometimes when you reach out to people, you’re really excited about a plot, and when it starts to play out, things go awry, and it creates a conflict that becomes difficult to deal with IC and we turn to OOC solutions. Character chemistry changes sometimes, or sometimes our writing styles don’t match. That’s OKAY! If you’re not feeling it, all it takes is a quick message. Something like:

YES ✓  “Hey, I’m not really feeling this plot/thread and would like to drop it. Thanks.”

  NO ✘  Immediate unfollow and/or block.

Dropping threads/plots/etc does NOT give anyone the right to treat your fellow writers poorly. Being short with people and getting upset over in-character interactions is not the way to go. IC should never cross over into OOC, and we need to take a step back and really think about what we’re actually upset about. Be concise and specific when you message each other so nothing’s really left up in the air. Please remember that behind each character is a real, imperfect person using this roleplay as a creative outlet. Be patient with each other, avoid taking things personally, and if you can’t mesh well out of character, it’s easy to just bow out of a conversation with common courtesy and leave each other alone before things escalate. I’m going to go over a few points I think we need a refresher on.

Brace yourself, this is a long read, but worth it!

Consent: ALWAYS check in with your RP partners and make sure it’s okay to do something before just writing it, however insignificant it might seem to you. Please do not godmode dialogue, actions, or extensions of said characters (pets, children, parents, or other NPCs they’ve made) unless you’ve asked for permission. When in doubt, ASK to make sure it’s okay!

TAGS and Triggers: Please remember that a character’s actions and viewpoints do NOT reflect the actions and viewpoints of the writer. A little louder for those in the back: IC =/= OOC. We’re in a roleplay with a variety of characters that deal with things like infidelity, internalized homophobia, crime, sex negativity, sex positivity, family issues, race issues, gender norms, gender fluidity and other issues that affect people in the LGBT and POC communities every day. All we ask is that everyone portray these issues respectfully and if you don’t know how to, then please do not attempt to until you’re more educated. Nobody wants to read a mockery of issues we deal with on the daily in real life. While we love seeing diversity, you do NOT need to write about deeper issues to make your character interesting. That being said, don’t take it upon yourself to play blog police. Come to the admin if you see something that’s a cause for concern, and keep in mind that you do NOT have to interact with every character in the RP. We have a list of triggers, please tag them accordingly. As much as we all love seeing steamy aesthetics and faceclaim posts on the dash, please tag NSFW accordingly. Need something added to the list? Please reach out to the admin so we can add it!

SMUT: Sometimes, people bring in FCs that we REALLY like! And maybe you wanna write your character and that character getting together, but consider this: maybe that person doesn’t want to jump right into smut. It can come off as fetishizing if that’s the only thing you ever want to plot or write about. People do NOT owe you an explanation as to why they won’t write smut. Respect that. If your character is aggressively pushing a sexual plot and you are asked to stop OOC, then you need to full-stop. Sex is a sensitive subject, whether you think so or not, and we respect everyone’s boundaries here. We strive for a safe space to write IC and OOC. That doesn’t mean don’t write smut ever, just have full, explicit CONSENT. It’s that easy! Don’t be pushy or borderline creepy about it, because that’s the surefire best way to get unfollowed. Have a question? Come to the admin! You don’t have to tag NSFW, but you can if it’s getting extremely graphic, just out of courtesy.

Plotting: Are you reaching out to plot with someone? Have some ideas ready, don’t rely on the other party to come up with all the ideas. Is someone reaching out to you? Make an effort to bring something to the table, but if you feel pressured into coming up with a plot all on your own, it’s okay to decline if you’re not feeling it. Need help coming up with stuff? Reach out to us! We can help. Just don’t reach out to your peers, say you want to plot, and never come up with a starter or anything, then come back time and again asking for ideas when the other person still doesn’t have any. Not only is that annoying, it’s off-putting and indicative that the rp will rely on one person for the most part. Not cute!

Inclusivity: Don’t be afraid of branching out. Everyone likes writing with friends, and that’s a given, but make a conscious effort to reply to open starters. I understand sometimes people are nervous, but that’s something we need to work through. If you’re nervous approaching someone, consider that they might be nervous to approach, too. Don’t make assumptions about people based on what you see alone. Some people gravitate to certain characters, but that doesn’t mean they won’t interact with you. If I had a nickel for how many times people assume my characters won’t want to interact with theirs when that’s not true at all, I’d have a lot of nickels! Open starters are the best way to get a feel for a character. Be creative in your interactions and the way you invite other characters to interact with yours through starters for best results.

YES ✓  “Hey, a starter from this character I haven’t interacted with, let’s gooo!” NO ✘  Ignore starters because you think they only bubble rp and won’t reply to you. (Open starters are open for a reason!)

Respect Time and Muse: Sometimes, people have muse for certain threads, certain characters, and won’t always get to every single reply they owe. If you feel like there is a problem, too much time has passed, please approach that person because it’s likely they missed a response. Tumblr activity feed can be a little weird, and not everyone uses thread trackers. That’s okay! Again, this is a hobby. That being said, don’t agree to plot if you don’t see yourself following through, and please don’t disregard threads you have with other people. That’s frustrating, and you wouldn’t want the same done to you. Some people might be on sporadically throughout the day, or on for a brief time at night, or even be on all day! Either way, they don’t owe you an explanation as to how they’re using their free time. If it gets to the point where anyone is feeling pigeonholed in a plot, it’s affecting your ability to roleplay your character, and you’ve tried communicating, then reach out to us and we’ll help. Everyone’s got the right to write what they enjoy and progress their character’s development.

He Said She Said: Did you hear something from a third party about a person and now refuse to interact with them IC or OOC because of it? You should probably take a step back and ask yourself if it’s actually true or just hearsay just because someone else didn’t like them for whatever reason. A lot of us have similar or same aliases, but we’re not all the same people. If someone personally does something to you, if you SEE certain behavior, by all means bring it to the admin’s attention. But please don’t spread rumors or buy into unsubstantiated claims. That can be more damaging than you realize. Again, we’re all real people on the other side of the screen. What if it was you being talked about?

Unfollowing vs Blocking: Look, we get it. You’re not gonna mesh with everyone. Sometimes people won’t get a hint, or do things that you just do not agree with fundamentally on an OOC level. We have a no blocking rule because we don’t want anyone feeling left out. If you wish to unfollow a character, that’s not optimal, but allowed, but please respectfully let that mun know so they don’t continue to try interacting. If you have been asked to stop interacting, please respect that so it doesn’t HAVE to escalate to admin intervention. That being said, we are here to help and help keep the peace between everyone, so do reach out to us for any reason. Don’t block people. If it does escalate, reach out to the admin so we can step in. If you want to unfollow someone, be sure it’s not solely because of IC actions.

TL;DR: COMMUNICATE OOC and be respectful to your fellow writers. At the end of the day, nobody wants to feel ignored, disrespected, or passed over, so please don’t be the reason why somebody feels this way. Be inclusive as much as you can, but respect that you won’t mesh with everyone. Don’t spread false rumors. Character chemistry, writing style, or content will vary from character to character and mun to mun. If you have any questions at all, the admin team is here to help! But it’s not that deep, Jay, it’s just RP. YEAH, WELL that’s not an excuse to treat people poorly. We can do better.

[livefrompittsburgh]

Happy House / Garbitch / YGSLRHSTFUT

11.22.19 // Los Angeles 

This post is a little late and a little unconventional for this blog. 

For starters, I was far from home. I had found myself in Burbank for an animation convention and managed to make my way to LA to check out the local punk scene. 

And the LA punks did NOT let me down in the slightest. 

My getting into the venue was interesting. The Smell’s entrance is in an ally which I didn’t know about until 10 minutes after I was standing in front of the very back of the place waiting for doors to open. Rookie mistake I bet. 

The show was a lot more than just the bands too. The first person to take the stage was Braxton. He talked about his time in the punk and metal scene as a black man and all of the racism that he faced and still faces. It’s a very important perspective to keep in mind. Punk is hailed as something inclusive and has had many incredible and iconic black musicians to rise to popularity in the scene, however a majority of punk and metal is still incredibly white. It was a lot to think about, especially coming from a scene myself where I’m mainly surrounded by white men. I was lucky enough to talk to Braxton too before I left, he was super down to earth and chill and I hightly recommend his hardcore band, Shred Bundy.

The next act was the first band up, Happy House. To my absolute delight, the mosh pit started almost instantly (Braxton actually shoved me right into the pit getting everything started. What a dude.). Happy House went hard as hell and made my heart so happy that someone so cute with cherries in their hair can get up on stage and absolutely fuck it up. Not that appearances matter, but I’m still so used to mediocre 30+ year old white guys it was so refreshing to see someone of that caliber up there.

The next speaker was J, a non binary Asian sex worker. They were giving tips on how to stay safe in the world of online sex work as well as how to get started. A big conversation was what sites to go on for work, how to protect your identity, and most of all make sure you’re getting paid right for your services. Another big point they made was how much less work/retweets you will get a someone who’s non-white with a different body type in the industry. 

The next band up was Garbitch. They brought it all to the stage. The head vocalist had a pink dildo on them at the beginning of their set and I just knew it was gonna be magical. They threw out plastic pig masks into the crowd and encouraged us to wear and destroy them to our hearts content as they sang a song about beating up cops. There were also a lot of teens present in the audience. The vocalist called them out, happy that their message is reaching and influencing the younger generation. One of the teens even asked me and some others to help her crowd surf. Near the end of their set, in the spirit of the classic riot grrrl movement, Garbitch made a call for all non-binary and trans people to come to the front. It was in that second that I felt truly a part of something. I felt seen for who I was, despite no one there knowing me. Garbitch is not only an incredible queercore band, they represent a community and a call to action. They make trans people feel safe and free to let out their emotions and frustrations in that pit. 

Then there was the fashion show. I was stunned. I was spoiled rotten. A mother fucking fashion show. They had brought in a local fashion designer, Audey Thunders (who is on Etsy), to showcase her newest works. The models came in all shapes, sizes, colors, and genders. The clothes were made out of old 90′s bedsheets turned into outfits. There were even some available for sale after the show. Unfortunately I didn’t get any of the clothes but I did snag a cool studded choker made from zippers. 

Last but most definitely not least was You Guys Suck Like Real Hard Shut The Fuck Up Thanks (or YGSLRHSTFUT for short). You Guys Suck had a way of commanding attention from the audience. They let everyone know that they would be heard and we would listen to every word. The very first song was called Fat, Black, and Trans which was a testament to the lead vocalist. She sat in the chair the whole time but that didn’t diminish the power of the set. You don’t have to thrash everywhere about the stage to be a punk. She talked and sang about everything. About her blackness, her transness, her homelessness. She told us all how LA is funneling more money into police than into taking care of the exceedingly large homeless population. The overall message and sound of You Guys Suck was the most powerful and impactful I’ve ever heard. Their final song had us chant along with them names of black women unjustly murdered by the hands of police. The loud and just fury of every single person in that room was so fucking powerful. Everyone was sent out with a call to action to combat the injustice that runs rampant in our streets killing our black population. 

There was one more act that night that I only caught a small glimpse of, a burlesque dancer. Unfortunately I had to dip because it was late and I had to catch an Uber back to Burbank. Had I stayed longer, I know I would have nothing but good things to say.

That night was hands down the best punk show I had ever been to. It opened my eyes and showed me that punk isn’t just white. Punk isn’t straight, or cis. Punk is so much more than the stuff that lies on the surface of the scene. That night I got to be a part of something. I got to be around people who are making an impact and causing change in the scene. I hope that some day I get to see anyone from that night again. I encourage every single person out there to check out these bands if you have the means. 

And to anyone who may have read this the whole way through: I love you. Thank you. 

[twinedjupiters]

am i the only person getting super worried that maria is the fourth alien?

i mean, it has to be an already significant character otherwise there won’t be any impact when it’s finally revealed, right?

and it would give a narrative reason for why maria is the only character who hasn’t been brought in on the secret yet and explains why this character, who plays a pretty significant role in the source material, has taken kind of a backseat in the story so far. because we, the audience, can’t know about everything she’s up to.

but beyond that, there are actually some things that have happened on the show that seem, to me, to suggest maria might be the fourth alien.

for starters, she’s connected to rosa

her psychic abilities could be alien powers

the one thing all the alien victims had in common was the wild pony stamp

possessed!isobel makes references to astrology, which maria is well-versed in

could the cause of mimi’s mental health issues be because maria’s been messing with her mind for two decades, making her think she’s maria’s mother when she’s really not?

max and michael discuss going to the faith healer in maria’s bar and the next thing we know maria is also going to the faith healer. could it be that she’s also curious if this person is another alien? or perhaps she’s just keeping tabs on max and michael?

and there are other things, too. like how ten years ago max and michael were both on the verge of falling in love and leaving roswell until something went horribly wrong and they both ended up staying in town while the people they loved -- both of whom happen to be maria’s best friends -- left them behind. i know that, on it’s own, that doesn’t seem to implicate maria in anything but then consider how, in 1.03, she’s resistant to helping liz track down all of rosa’s hiding spots (seriously, rewatch that episode and keep an eye on maria, everything she does or says, down to facial expressions, can be explained by her being the fourth alien) until they get to the drive in and liz says she wants to spy on max on his date. maria immediately goes off and comes back with a plan, taking her to the roof of the crashdown and showing her the constellation that just happens to point to max’s letter which liz will assume was meant for rosa, driving a wedge between max and liz. 

which of course also raises the question: did she only sleep with michael to try and drive him and alex apart, too?

it sure seems like someone is trying to keep the aliens in roswell and maria is pretty well-situated to do it.

also this:

notice how they’re sitting in the exact same spots?

now, all this being said, i very much DO NOT WANT maria to be the fourth alien. i love maria deluca and i want her on the the squad. and there is some evidence that makes me doubt my theory so i’m gonna list that now and make myself feel a little bit better:

some of the things possessed!isobel said in the flashbacks in 1.10 made me think the fourth alien is actually a guy but then again, when you can possess anybody you want what is gender really?

at least thus far, all of the aliens have been white while most of the humans have been poc, which would imply that maria is human

we don’t know a whole lot about maria’s history but there’s never been an implication that there’s anything strange there (like being found wandering the desert mute and naked)

she did seem genuinely surprised when she found out about malex although she’d have to feign surprise regardless i suppose to keep her cover and i have always found it hard to believe that someone with seemingly legit psychic ability couldn’t tell that her best friend has spent the past decade in love with a guy she sees just about everyday at her bar

that’s not as many points as i was hoping to come up with and i talked myself out of half of them. 

the fact of the matter is, we’re due for a liar. one of the things i love about this show is how honest the characters tend to be with one another, either voluntarily or because everyone sucks at lying. every time i think someone on this show is going to keep a secret from someone else they never do it and it’s been super refreshing and great but the other shoe has gotta drop at some point. someone here is lying and i’m afraid it’s maria.

EDIT: i posted this and then watched the 1.11 promo and oh fuck that did not help i’m even more worried

[venus-says]

Aikatsu Friends! Episodes 58-63

Smiles are the seeds that bloom into flowers of happiness.

Me? Posting Aikatsu again? Oh boy, I think I’m sick. XD

Okay, jokes aside, aikatsu is back in the blog. I promise I still like aikatsu, the thing is, the subs come out very late and I kinda forget about it because I have stuff to do, and since doing these without subs ain’t the best idea (you gonna see why in a minute) the episodes end up pilling up. I’m a mess, sorry. XD

But anyway we got a lot to cover so let’s get going.

Episode 58 is the start of the Sorbet Kingdom ark.

So to starters, I have to apologize. I always very mad about the whole borders situation last time I did this mostly because I thought Sorbet was like an entire country and what they’ve shown us was just the capital, but from this episode is clear that this isn’t the case. Sorbet is either a city-state or a microstate, pretty much like what Monaco is (the difference being Monaco doesn’t have a king, when sorbet has one), so denying their visa wouldn’t do much since they were traveling to another country that has free passage to Sorbet. So I’m sorry.

Now back to the episode itself, I think they went a bit overboard with how Alicia treated the girls. I’m not saying that she should receive them with open arms and everyone be happy forever, but when you have a scene of she coldly saying that they should fuck off and in the next scene she says to let them use rooms from the castle it gives mixed signals and it just seems dumb. I think they should either had toned her coldness in the first scene and denying Hibiki in a less rash way or make Charles find another place in town to put the girls and be something like “my sister doesn’t want you all here, but I know she’s in pain and I wanna help so I’m gonna sneak you guys to X place”, either option would’ve worked better.

That little flashback about the kingdom was nice, but I don’t think it had a lot of purpose. I think it serves to show Hibiki why Alicia went back to her country and never went to meet her again, but seeing that their relationship was already going places via their text messages and phone calls, it’s odd that this was never brought up by Hibiki or Alicia. I must say for a show about friendship, people in this universe don’t seem to talk to each other at all and is just weird.

The performance... it was okay, I guess. I still don’t know why they had to perform the most basic song in their most basic outfit but I really don’t care that much. What I’m more curious about, as someone who lives in a country where snow isn’t a thing, is can you actually make a stage out of snow and have people stand on top of it without the whole thing collapsing? XD Friends from the northern hemisphere, please tell me.

One last thing before we move on, CHARLES IS ADORABLE AND HE’S THE BESTEST BOY EVER AND I WANNA HUG HIM TILL HIS OUT OF BREATHE. Thank you. XD

I kinda wanna skip talking about Episode 59, because I don’t have a lot to say about the episode itself and all I have in my mind is Mirai’s performance because that’s the only interesting thing this episode has going on for itself.

Like, LMT is there and that’s nice (even though I don’t see why they traveled separated from the main group), I didn’t really understand the whole evol ustakia thing (but those three sisters were a lot of fun), and I honestly didn’t see the point of having Tamaki flashing here and there having troubles just to upload a video.

That final scene with Hibiki and Alicia was nice, we got a little bit of the jeweling dresses lore and a lovely moment of Hibiki promising that she’ll bring everyone’s smiles back. But that’s not enough to hold the episode high.

Mirai’s performance does lift things up a bit, Nice na to meet you is an A M A Z I N G song and it was very refreshing to see something new (which for some reason it seems to be a very rare thing for friends!). This reveal could’ve been more impactful if the opening hadn’t spoiled Mirai’s dress? I believe yes. But even that can’t take away the positives of this performance that was, without a doubt, the highlight of the episode.

While 59 was meh Episode 60 was kinda good, I quite enjoyed this one, I dare to say this is the best one of this ark.

This episode goes hard on the emotional side, we all know this is the first time in the Aikatsu series we see a character die, and it is a very strong scene. Sadly it seems that all of the emotional parts were focused only on the flashbacks and they forgot of bringing this to the present a little bit.

Like, in the present we see more of Alicia’s struggle on trying to be a good ruler for the people and the country she loves while still wanting to do Aikatsu, but everything is still very undertoned. We know she didn’t want to stop Aikatsu but she had to because in her mind that was the correct thing to do, but we don’t see that being verbalized or acted in the present, we see glimpses of it which is interesting, but we could’ve seen more of that.

The main conflict of this episode works just fine, and I like how Tamaki deals with the situation, but when they pull out a kotatsu out of nowhere they lose me in that scene, like how’s that supposed to work outside? Aren’t those things electric? Where are they plugging it in????? C’mon people. I’d like much more to see more of Alicia, maybe she talking to Charles about her duties and everything so that we can see in her the desire to do Aikatsu again rather than the kotatsu scene (even though Mirai’s impression of Aine was really fun to watch).

Seeing Hibiki perform is always great, but seeing Alicia asking Hibiki to perform holds more meaning and is one of those glimpses that I mentioned that I wish we could’ve seen more. Regardless is still great and the moment when Hibiki reassures her promise to Alicia from the last episode just crown up this episode as a good one, despite its flaws.

Loose notes from the episode: Hibiki and Mirai’s competition was fun, I like Karen being the one who gets to win even though she wasn’t competing; the three sisters again are a treat like always; Charles remains the goodest boy ever and I want a plushie of him; and to top it all we got to see Honey Cat for a little bit so we know at least someone in the writing team didn’t forget they exist so, points for this episode.

Episode 61 is the polemic one.

So, the first time I saw this episode I watched it without subs and I watched it alone without watching the 3 episodes past. And at that moment it worked for me, it seemed like a good resolve for this mini-ark.

But watching now with the subs I don’t like it as much.

Don’t get me wrong, I still love Alicia’s performance and the moment she and Hibiki reconciliate is pretty good. I also appreciate having more lore in the Jeweling dresses, I feel like we desperately need a lot more info on them because so far they all just seem like a gimmick and they don’t have a purpose or reason to exist at all so any bit of info we get I’m happy.

HOWEVER.

This episode has a massive throwback, everything on this episode was build upon a lie. I get that Mio’s suggestion was supposed to be a “white lie”, a lie that causes no harm. But that doesn’t work when you make AN ENTIRE CITY LIE and tells them TO PRETEND THEY’RE LIVING AN EXPERIENCE THAT CAN GET THEM DEAD just to make their princess sing and dance on a stage. This is so selfish and so wrong. *sigh* I don’t even want to continue talking about this. Let’s just move on.

Episode 62 is a good change of pace after the low point that 61 was.

Yeah, it was silly. I have a lot of questions about how Love Me Tear got there earlier than the other, and what was the point of the frogs, and how they didn’t give much of a reaction to knowing about Karen’s house when none of them went there before.

But I’m okay with all of that because this episode was very sweet and it was good seeing the “side” girls get some attention. And how good of a combination that Reflect Moon and Wakaba was, I’m legitimately surprised I wasn’t expecting this to work so well, but they formed a very good group to follow around for this period of time.

Having two performances on this episode was a cheap move probably to fill up time but you know what? I’m not complaining. I’m just glad I got to clear my pallet from the terrible after taste last episode left in my mouth.

Episode 63 was nice. I like that they had an episode to reintegrate Alicia in the idol world. Sadly the episode had to share space with Karen's plot that wasn't as strong and interesting and makes a potentially great episode become just a regular one in the end.

And this time I'm being true to my words when I say I don' have anything else to comment about this episode. Like, Karen's dress looks good and her song is nice as well, but I like her old ones better. I don't see the point of Karen hiding to read her fan mail in the middle of the night. And most of Alicia's adapting process was very fun but there's not a lot there to create a conversation on my eyes.

Like, my brain didn't have a lot of work going on while I was watching it, it was a nice watch to just space out a bit while I was thinking in the job application I just dropped in the mayor's office today. I'm sorry if I wasn't as invested in this one as I was for the other ones I promise to dedicate myself more next time FOR THE HONEY CAT EPISODE THAT I'M SUPER EXCITED ABOUT. See ya~ XD

[sqrrlbot]

Sense8 post-marathon thought dump

Alright, I already know this is gonna be hella long and rambly so I will put it under a cut, but if anyone’s considering doing what I did and giving Sense8 a shot all I can say is: go for it, and maybe consider taking some time off so you can watch it all at once because it’s probably the most enjoyable show I’ve marathoned in many years. It’s fucking bonkers, absolutely ridiculous, stupidly happy and so fandom friendly I’m legit shocked it didn’t take over tumblr more than what I saw (but then I can’t say much about it since I sat it out too). 

I literally JUST finished and for starters, there’s never been a show where I’ve been so sure (even before it ended) that I would go back and watch it all over again - usually I only rewatch bits here and there but with this show I think there’s gonna be more parts I watch than I skip. In fact, I’m gonna rewatch some stuff before finishing this, because I’m not ready to let it go yet (I got confused about the episodes and didn’t realize until well over half-way in to the finale that it WAS the finale so I’m still processing that it’s all gone). Just imagine these paragraphs with some 5-10 minute breaks in between them where I go back and watch stuff again. 

That finale was SO GOOD though, like fanservice to the fucking max from start to finish - bringing everyone back and together like they damned well should but so many shows weirdly refuse to do, even when it’s definitely the last episode. It’s as if the writers worry it’ll be too much somehow (of what who knows), and this show is like the opposite of that - this show goes “nah, not enough” and piles on more. It’s excessive in it’s fanservice - fanservice here encompassing things that honestly shouldn’t even be considered anything special: resolving character arcs, character growth, giving every character time to shine, having characters from different plotlines interact, but apparently all that shit is fucking impossible for 99% of all shows so I guess it’s fucking fanservice. And then there’s the ACTUAL fanservice of hot people in little-to-no clothing, hot shippy scenes, gratuitous happy family scenes of everyone being disgustingly happy and celebrating and boy are there a lot of those too. And it’s amazing. 

Before I keep gushing there definitely were things I wasn’t happy with, in the show overall and the finale. Also a lot of things I’m not sure yet how I feel about them, but that might be a post for later (or never). For now I just kinda want to enjoy enjoying a show though, without dwelling on the negatives - it’s a rare show that I feel earns that kind of pass (even temporarily) but this show is just so joyful and positive at it’s core and it’s rubbing off on me. Whatever I expected going into this show it wasn’t how happy it was - no matter how angsty it got at times it kept going back to pure joy and that’s probably the most groundbreaking and fresh thing about it. (Guess I’m back to gushing again.) It’s just so fucking refreshing to see a show that can go to deep dark places and still somehow be so light and optimistic and sentimental.

The fact that they ended with a fucking orgy and closed on a rainbow colored dildo and THEN cut to “for our fans” is ... a lot. It’s a lot to process. Like, power move of the century, right there - check fucking mate. 

The ships, oh the ships... The one that really got me up in the feels was Kala/Wolfgang, and I’m still adjusting to the idea of it being Kala/Rajan/Wolfgang because I am not used to shows resolving love triangles by just going “why choose when you can have both” - I’m definitely onboard with that solution but my brain’s gonna need a moment to adjust to it. (There is one part of me who’s like “okay, but she literally said ‘I didn’t know what love was until you’ to Wolfgang but now she loves Rajan too?” but honestly, that voice should probably just shut up and be happy.) Probably a pretty long moment though...

The rest of the ships were mostly about equal in their ability to have me chin-handsing and squeeing like the 14 year old I still am - usually in a show I have one or two ships, maybe three, and this one gave me like twice that and it. was. satisfying. It’s like I’ve been starved on good shipping and this show threw me into the goddamn buffet, both in terms of number of ships and quality of shippyness. 

Oh yeah, I haven’t gushed about the music yet - this show had GOOD FUCKING MUSIC. Another thing I haven’t seen much of lately and have missed greatly, takes me back to the 00s - The OC, Chuck, Veronica Mars: shows that introduced me to artists I still love and listen to. Idk if this is quite in that category but still, something that I’ve been missing a lot is shows that actually use good music and use it well. 

Okay I think I’m done, for now, with this post at least Off to a deep-dive in the tags/youtube/AO3... 

(Actually, I will say, while I do feel like this might be the one show that could have gone on longer without losing it’s soul and/or mind, I still am kind of happy in a way that it ended when it did - I just can’t trust writers/execs anymore not to fuck up a good thing when they have it and the more time they get the more likely it is. Maybe the answer is/should be shorter shows, or maybe TPTB just need to get their heads out of their asses but until then, I’m happy to have a show that didn’t go completely off the rails before it ended. I wish they would have had a bit more time to end it, though.)

[gut-her-girl]

the story so far (tw!!)

first non reblog post <3 feels weird not just lurking but refreshing to have a safe space to share things even if its just going into the void. 

(im 21 and 5′8″ for reference)

i n t r o d u c t i o n 

i cant remember not having a shitty relationship with food and my body, but id say it got bad around 16 (depression, family trauma, shit hit the fan & all that) it started out as strictly bingeing as a coping mechanism, im talking whole frozen pizzas daily, a family sized bag of chips in one sitting, a 12 pack of soda a week, i could go on... like i said shit was bad. gained a ton of weight that year, pulled myself out of that depressive hole and some how lost the extreme bingeing weight but i saw photos of myself from that year and thats when the hatred for my body started. things leveled out weight wise for awhile, ate like shit and binged but i think my metabolism was crazy fast in highschool so i was always average or on the thin side, just tried my best to avoid being naked in front of mirrors, going to the beach, out of sight out of mind. then senior year i got into a relationship (relationship weight is real folks!!) gained a ton of weight due to that... tried to diet, exercise, worked for awhile, failed, binged, repeat, got fat again. 

c o l l e g e  p t 1

the summer after graduation i broke up with my boyfriend and left for college where all i did was sleep, party, and juul. when i left for school i was around 150-145... go to the doctor a few months into school all of the sudden im 120 lbs and id say this is when my intentional restriction started. when i was skinny i got so much positive attention, male validation, female validation, everyone thought i was pretty and i had never been the pretty girl. when id come home for break my family would mention how much weight id lost and i started to live for that shit. continued my diet of vodka and nicotine through sophomore year of college. that year i moved in with a girl who struggled with disordered eating and without knowing she taught me everything i needed to know. she was constantly talking calories, obsessive workouts, had my absolute dream body but called herself fat every chance she got, learned about intermittent fasting, diet coke, rice cakes, gum... basically got an ed starter pack without even knowing lmao. 

c o l l e g e  p t 2

sophmore year i maintained around 120 (even hit 119 at one point <3) going into the covid lockdown the summer after sophomore year i was dirt poor... like shop lifting food just to eat poor. id say i ate strictly plain oatmeal for around 3 months, with the occasional jar of peanut butter here and there and i didnt have a car so i walked everywhere, like at least 2 hrs daily. we didnt have a scale in the house but i was visibly losing weight and i finally started to appreciate parts of me that id always hated... my hips dips, my legs, my smaller chest. i still felt fat most of the time but those fleeting moments were so nice. i remember coming home to meet my niece and nephew and my sister told me she was worried about my weight loss and asked me if i had an eating disorder, when she said those things it made me proud even though i knew it was wrong. i also remember some friends came to town that summer and they tried to be kind and buy me food when we went out to eat and i didnt know how to say no so i accepted, but eating and having a full stomach after being hungry for so long made me feel disgusting. after i got home i was sitting there full and nauseous and i decided to purge for the first time. my thought process was, i pull trig when im drunk and it makes me feel better so it seemed logical, and so thats what i did whenever i felt full the next few months. things really went down hill for me mentally that summer, i was so alone, i started self harming again, and being so small was one of the few things that made me happy.

g o i n g  h o m e

fast foward to october of 2020 and i decide to move home to save money. my body mustve been in starvation mode after months of restriction and daily exercise because i swear to god my body has hung on to every fucking calorie since i got home and had more access to food. i hardly left the house for a few months so i only wore sweats and baggy shirts, i knew id gained some weight but i was trying not to think about it and to listen to my sister who was constantly preaching fuel your body, self love, etc. one day i go to put on my favorite pair of jeans and they dont fit. i mean not even fucking close. i dont know how it happened or how id completely lost control of my everything but id catapulted back up to pre college weight and it broke me. i was consumed with self hatred, i had constant breakdowns and went right back to avoiding the mirror, never getting dressed, no fucking way was i gonna get on a scale because then it would make it real that the weight was back and all my hardwork was gone. its like i lost my identity, everything that had made me pretty. so i tried to do it the “right way” started working out, making sure i was in a small calorie deficit and finally worked up the courage to get on the scale only to have it say 146... pre college weight... even after all the work id been putting in. i tried to continue that way and just ignore the problem but my friends are so skinny and so beautiful and i just want to be excited to take pictures with them again, i just want to be me again. 

n o w 

soooo now im back to restricting and fasting and lots of walking (trying to avoid bingeing and purging at all costs) and ive been seeing some visible changes but i hadnt weighed myself until today and im down to 134, seeing progress made me so fucking happy. im going to get back to my happy pretty self and i feel so safe here even though so far all ive done is read what everyone else has to say. ive never shared my struggles with anyone and now i have an outlet, its comforting to see people my age here and it just feels nice to not feel crazy and alone. 

[iamstilltrying]

28 June 2020

Hello again, future Vincy.

THis is present Vincy coming to you, in a time of Coronavirus. Here’s a quick update of what has been happened recently:

Singapore had just come out of a near 3-month long lockdown, or more commonly known as the Circuit Breaker (CB), and are now in Phase 2. Now you have to wear masks wherever you go, had to observe social distancing of 1m, and could not gather in groups of more than 5. You had just re-contracted your job in the Service, and heard news about one of your favourite colleague intending to depart in about 1 and a half months’ time. Yesterday, you went to the gym with your favourite guy, the first time that you’ve ever been to a proper gym session. 

I read your last post, on 9 Jun 2019, that was written more than a year ago. To say that things have changed drastically, is an understatement. Let me try to explain what had changed in the past year.

For starters, the guy that you mentioned who was making you “so happy” in the previous post? Gone. Spoiler alert, that happiness was temporary for he brought you much sadness and anxiety in the months after. It didn’t work out, you met a few other people, and in particular, this one guy who is still present in my life now.

This guy - he didn’t stick out to you much. Simply because when you met him, you were still quite hung up over the previous guy that you didn’t work out with. But this guy, let’s call him R, is the one that I’m still with today, and will be celebrating our first-year anniversary in less than a month’s time.

The feelings and connection with R didn’t come instantly. We didn’t exactly start off strong Nor was there an immediate spark upon meeting him for the first time. But that didn’t mean that it was all that bad. It just meant that there was room to grow. And boy, did it grow. You started to realise how sincere he was, and how good he was at taking care of you. He made you feel heard, cherished and appreciated, which has been quite a while since you felt those things. 

He was like a cup of hot chocolate on a rainy evening, so warm and comforting, which is what I think I need and want now. He has done so many things for you, and with you, and has taken great care of you, emotionally, mentally, and physically.

He is the only one that you had start seeing a future with, and has made you excited for what is to come, in the life with him. I know it may be too early to say this, but I really think I may spend the rest of my life with him, and I would very much like it that way. I know that we have not been together for a Long time (we first met each other on 24 June 2019), but it feels like I know him well enough, and that I would learn nothing else about him that would make me doubt him.

I don’t know if I’m just being naive and overly-trusting again, but I think he is different in all the good ways, and I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with him.

And also an update on the previous man in your life - a lot of things had happened since the last post. Basically, you found out on yet another one of his lies, and that really helped you to get over him for good. You could have called him out on it, but you didn’t. Instead, you used it as a reminder of who he is and the pain that being with him brought you, to kill all hope and desires of having him in your life again.

Recently, you dropped him a message just to wish him well over his holidays. He told you that life hasn’t been good, life did not go according to plan and he was forced to take on jobs that were undesired. Not gonna lie, you did feel so bad for him, but there was nothing you could do, but to encourage him too. This is a particularly tough period for everyone, not just him, as the lockdown of many countries meant that many lost their jobs as the world economy tanked. This too shall pass, things will get better, I told him, half-believing my own words. I truly hope that things will get better for him, and that he will find his own peace and happiness though.

It has been pretty rough at work too, as you feel the stress coming on you as the work starts piling up. News of your close colleague leaving has hit you hard too. Knowing that the team that you had joined, is going to be refreshed entirely with a whole new group of colleagues. You’re the last one standing, even though you don’t want to be. But you also know how grateful and thankful you should be for having a stable job that pays well, especially in this climate. And so, you keep holding on to the things that you should be grateful for, instead of the things that makes you upset.

I wish all the best for you, future Vincy. And I hope that the next time you are on here, updating me on your life again, that you will have made peace with all the issues that you are facing now. :)