#i did NOT mean for this is published so late but i fell asleep and i woke up at like 1am so i was like LET'S WRITE IM MY DIARY
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☆ hawk talk 8/16/23 ☆
i was waiting at the front of the school with the rest of the entire school for them to open the doors
and what happened?
all the girls were screaming because of a fucking cicada.
my ears have hurt less from listening to death rock at max volume.
I. WAS. NOT. PREPARED. FOR 40 GIRLS SCREAMING THEIR LUNGS OUT.
oh and uh it was funny bc at one point delgado started jumping up and down to catch the cicada lol
oh and speaking of him, when the staff let us in the school building we had to still wait in the quad(i think that's what we call it) for an other 20 minutes and it turns out i was sorta close to him and his friends while waiting and we made eye contact and he waved at me <3
and his friends kinda just like,, looked at me and i'm like uh hi?
LIKE TF
yeah uh
delgado is really cool but i don't think his friends are too fond of me *awkwardly zones out and questions life bc i haven't been mean and i don't want real chill people to hate me bc that has happened way too many times*
SO ANYWAY-
oh yeah i forgot something
HOW THE HELL DO I ALWAYS END UP WALKING BEHIND DELGADO?? LIKE BITCH RESPECTFULLY MOVE OUT THE WAY I CANNOT SEE OVER YOU YOU'RE LIKE AT LEAST 3 INCHES TALLER THAN ME AND I AM ALREADY BLIND AS IT IS
but like it's better than all the taller people being behind me and me almost getting trampled
so.. yeah ig...
nothing much happened in history
it was boring
but my desk buddy was acting pretty cool
i still don't like her but i don't necessarily hate her rn
um math was the same ??
oh we learned a way easier way to solve a particular kind of equation!!!!
IM REALLY EXCITED ABOUT THAT!
OH AND THEN WE HAD ENGLISH!!
AND OMG SO THE TEACHER HAD BEEN PRONOUNCING BASEBALL GUY'S NAME WRONG FOR A WEEK AND A HALF OMFG
AND LIKE I KNEW SHE WAS PRONOUNCING IT WRONG BC THERE WAS NO WAY HIS NAME SOUNDED THAT STUPID
Y'ALL I CAN'T-
AND THEN THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED HAPPENED:
Mrs. k: *road call* *says baseball guy's name*
baseball guy: here
mrs. k: i'm not pronouncing that right, am i?
baseball guy: nope.
mrs. k: *waits for him to pronounce it right* ... *guesses and actually gets it right*
baseball guy: *still don't fucking say anything*
(he's jut like this when it comes to the english teacher so the whole not talking thing isn't like strange behavior or anything)
oh and delgado's short bestie had to do testing still so he had to go to another classroom
and like
we have a new student. she sat at our table. so uh,, yeah
it was like kinda awkward cus any time i tried engaging in conversation with her she didn't answer me and i was like okay you're probably not a bitch and ur just shy that's fine but like i wanted to scream
BASEBALL GUY IS QUIET TOO BUT AT LEAST HE SPEAKS WHEN SPOKEN TO GODDAMN
so it was awkward just having someone literally just watch me and my friend speak for a while but then i was like fuck you and completely tuned her out
AND WAS NO ONE GONNA TELL ME HOW PAINSTAKINGLY AWKWARD IT IS FOR YOU AND SOMEONE ELSE TO GRAB THE SAME SHEET OF PAPER MULTIPLE TIMES BC LIKE ALL THE PAPERS WERE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DESK AND ME AND BASEBALL GUY KEPT REACHING FOR THE SAME PAPER LIKE FIVE FUCKING TIMES AND AT ONE POINT I WAS LIKE NAW BESTIE I'M JUST PUTTING MY HAND DOWN AND I JUST WAITED FOE HIM TO GIVE ME THE PAPERS BC HOLY SHIT I WANTED TO SHRIVEL UP AND DIE (let it die, let it die, let it shrivel up and die! was written about me actually)
oh and like we used this one program to measure our lexile and like i was the only student who's never used it before
so i'm like hha idk what to do <3
and mrs. k explained it and basically you read and get quizzed and that's it and like i didn't know where to find my test score so like i wrote down the wrong answer on my log 😭😭
AND THE NUMBER FOR LIKE A CERTAIN PART OF THE THINGY WAS 8 PLUS 20 BONUS POINTS
SO I WROTE THAT DOWN
AND THEN DELGADO SAW AND HE'S LIKE [INSERT DEAD NAME) THAT AIN'T RIGHT 💀 SMTH AIN'T ADDIN UP
so then i was like WHERE TF DO I LOOK FOR MY SCORE THEN
and yeah when i gave him my chromebook to show me where tf to look i just had to scroll down 😭😭
and then he was like "oh you got a hundred, good job!" and then i mentally started doing a happy dance <3
and then we like did our english journal thing to where we had to glue shit and put tabs in our notebook and stuff and it was actually fun !!
and then we had to number a bunch of pages and i treated it like a race in my head bc i'm like that and even tho nobody technically knew i was racing, i WON, bitches
so then i decided to bother delgado at lunch again 🙃
well idk if i bothered him per se, or his friends 💀
so like my mom has been packing me dragon fruit everyday for lunch and i got burned out this week so i gave it to delgado's friend Alex
and he's like "why you keep giving me this 😃" and he's like naw i still want it but like why
and i'm like "because i'm fucking nice 🙂"
nah i just said that i was burned out and shit
so yeah
and brO-
DELGADO HAS THE BEST CURSED IMAGE COLLECTION I HAVE EVER SEEN LIKE I SERIOUSLY NEED TO UP MY GAME Y'ALL
I SWEAR I ALMOST CHOKED ON MY POZOLE THREE TIMES
oh and like i also gave delgado the tortillas my mom packed me bc i wasn't that hungry and i did not think that him eating the school good was a good idea bc it's on a prison level of shitty ngl
so then this bitch takes the tortillas, and him and alex start slapping each other in the face with them 😭😭
ALEX THROWS THE TORTILLA ACROSS THE FUCKING MESS HALL DUDES
AND THEN DELGADO TAKES THE 3RD TORTILLA AND CRUMPLES IT UP AND WRAPS IT INTO A BALL IN THE TINFOIL AND THROWS IT AT SOMEONE'S HEAD
THIS BITCH IS A MENACE
oh and yo i found out that Alex is of puerto rican descent and i'm like so glad that the group i hang out with is all latino
except lanie, she's the token gringa, but that's alright, it's not her fault <3
so then from the mess hall, me and delgado are headed the same way bc our lockers are sorta close to one another
and THIS BITCH
so i put my stuff back in my locker, right?
well now i'm having to exit the hallway for our grade and it's loud as fuck and then all a sudden i hear delgado yelling my name and he's running up to me and is like "HEY! WE NEED OUR CHROMEBOOKS!"
wait let's format it like this:
okay from the top:
d: *running up to me and yelling bc it's loud asf* HEY! [INSERT LEGAL NAME] WE NEED OUR CHROMEBOOKS!!!"
m: WHAT?? (m stands for Me) AGAIN???
d: YEAH
*runs to my locker to grab it*
random ass teacher: hey! go around!
(we have a system where you enter the hallway one way, and if you need to go back, you have to exit and start all over. it sucks ass. i hate it)
m: *running to catch up with d after getting my chromebook bc we have PE in the same period*
my gym coach: oh no, only the boys need it bc they didn't do the form yet
m: *ready to lay on the gym floor and cry* oh, okay! *acts happy bc i ain't bout to be a weak bitch infront of her*
m: *runs like my life depends on it to my locker to put my chromebook back and runs back to the gym* (THE GYM AND MY GRADE HALLWAY ARE NOT CLOSE TO EACH OTHER, AT ALL Y'ALL)
(LITERALLY RUNNING TO THE OPPOSITE SIDE OF THE SCHOOL)
I WAS ALMOST LATE BUT I BARELY MADE IT BEFORE THE TARDY BELL RANG AND I SWEAR I DID A FUCKING MILE SINCE I RAN BACK AND FORTH LIKE 4 TIMES SO ME THINKS THAT COUNTS FOR ENOUGH PE
and then we had to do like fitness testing and we did:
push-ups, sit ups, crunches, shuttle runs, a lap around the volleyball court, and then basketball
AND WE DO THE MILE ON FRIDAY, IF IT DOESN'T RAIN!!!!!
I'M SO EXCITED FOR THAT !!!!
^^ this is genuine, y'all. i love running so much!! yk, except for when it's back and forth across the entire school trying not to be late
AND LIKE I WAS SO FUCKING PISSED AT DELGADO BC DEEP DOWN I KNEW I DIDN'T NEED MY CHROMEBOOK BC WE DID THAT SHIT YESTERDAY
but then i was like why am i mad at him? it's not like he knew or anything so i didn't yell at him or anything lol
and then at the end of school when i passed him in the hallway, we said our goodbyes and yeah since i have first lunch tomorrow –technically today but whatever– we don't have the same lunch schedule, but i'll probably eat lunch with him on Friday, so that's cool!
oh and also, since i hate broadcast with a burning passion, my mom is going to go raging bitch mode in my school until i get an elective in my grade hallway that i want <3
and i want an elective in my grade hallway so i have 3rd lunch so that i don't ever have to eat lunch alone bc i look like a sad girl with no friends when i have 1st lunch and my anxiety peaks so yeah
I HOPE YOU LIKED TODAY <3
well technically yesterday but whatever fuck off
it's now 3:30am and i need to sleep
i woke up at 1am for no reason so??
yeah lol
night <3
#☆ hawk talk#i did NOT mean for this is published so late but i fell asleep and i woke up at like 1am so i was like LET'S WRITE IM MY DIARY
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Take a Bite Ch. 6
✧ PAIRING: yoongi x fem!reader
✧ SUMMARY: Your fledgling career as a music journalist is finally going in some kind of direction that must be on the path to success. Your coworkers like you enough to invite you out on Fridays, your boss is starting to think you’re competent enough to let you score a few bylines, and you’re finally getting the hang of InDesign. All of your hard work, late nights, and complete lack of a social life are starting to pay off… Even if it all came at the expense of the longest relationship of your life. Fine. You’ve accepted the fact that romance isn’t for you, under any circumstances. You won’t risk your career for anybody. Not even Min Yoongi.
✧ TAGS: slow burn, eventual smut, eventual romance, producer yoongi, music journalist reader, neighbors to friends to lovers? you’ll see, reader is bad at feelings, reader is post-break up
✧ WARNINGS: um... CLIFFHANGER?
✧ WORDCOUNT: 5.4k
✧ STATUS: complete
✧ AUTHOR’S NOTE: chapter 6 is here early!!! holy shit. this is the second to last chapter of take a bite, so next week's update will wrap everything up! i don't want to give too much away about what happens in this one, but just for reference... um. P.S. i'm sorry in advance. P.P.S. thank you so much tanni @love4myg for beta reading this chapter for me! you saved my wordy ass from publishing so many run-on sentences.
Chapter 6: Y’all Ain’t Never Been To A Party Before?
“Y/N, YOU WHORE!”
So, many things are happening. Holy shit.
First, to your surprise, midnight kimchijeon with Yoongi last night very quickly devolved into more sex.
You had been a little bit anxious while you watched him cook, and even more anxious while you both ate in relative silence, that the weirdness coming off of Yoongi in waves at the mention of Yijeong had effectively killed the vibe. Thankfully, being bent over his kitchen counter and fucked into oblivion did wonders to kill that worry before it fully took root.
It was… You’ve never been fucked quite like that before. Practically drooling onto the marble beneath you as he pounded into you, his hands gripping at your ass, his gravelly voice in your ear, growling “thank me again. You wanna come? Thank me for fucking you like this, come on, show me how much you fucking like it,” and you did. Fuck, he was mean, but you liked it, you liked it so much.
For somebody who very openly prefers to remain completely stationary (and horizontal, if he can help it), Yoongi sure has a fuckton of stamina. So… score.
Second, due to said stamina and your resulting exhaustion following round two, you ended up staying over at Yoongi’s apartment last night. Which was not the plan originally, but both you and Yoongi were unconvinced that you could safely make the journey down the hall back to your own apartment. When the opportunity to crash on a purple mattress presented itself so enticingly, you were powerless to resist.
You both fell asleep very tired and very unclothed, the latter of which probably would’ve resulted in even more sex come morning—sex you were very much looking forward to—if you hadn’t awoken to approximately seven trillion notifications on your phone from Rina, scaring the absolute piss out of you and forcing you to leave a very confused Yoongi to deal with his morning wood all by his lonesome.
It’s around eleven in the morning, the latest you’ve slept in months, when you roll into your own apartment, sleep-mussed and fucked out.
Which brings you to the third thing.
Rina is here. Like, here. In your apartment. Not in Paris.
Breaking the sound barrier with her excitement as she looks you up and down, in all of your walk-of-shame glory.
“What are you doing here?” you ask, your voice still scratchy with sleep. You toss your keys on the closest flat surface to give Rina a very confused hug. You missed her, of course. Terribly so, and that outweighs anything else. But also, what?
“What weren’t you doing here?” Rina quips, squeezing you tight in return. “And please tell me the answer is Yoongi.”
It dawns on you that you and Rina haven’t really spoken since you actually went through with everything, being in different time zones and all. ‘Yoongi invited me to his studio where he produces music and then made me come with his tongue so hard I almost died’ didn’t seem like an announcement to be made over text.
“I don’t think that makes sense,” you mumble into her shoulder before pulling away, sheepish. “But yes, I was at Yoongi’s.”
“Slut,” Rina squeals, her hands latching onto your shoulders and shaking you. “I need to meet him.”
Oh, fuck.
Your eyes widen instantly, slight panic overtaking you as you glance back at your door. You know Rina, and you know that she is not above striding over to Yoongi’s apartment right now and getting a good eyeful for herself.
“Oh my god, Rina, no.” You grab Rina’s hands firmly, pleading. “He’s barely even awake. I promise I’ll tell you every last detail if you don’t do that, holy shit.”
She laughs, pulling her hands away to cross her arms, raising an expectant eyebrow at you. “I’m waiting.”
You sigh, trudging into your kitchen to start a pot of coffee, since you’re clearly going to need it.
“Tell me why you’re in my apartment first,” you say, fishing two mugs out of a cabinet and setting them on the counter. “Not that I mind, but… Paris?”
After the coffee is brewed and doled out, you both move to your couch for a much-needed debriefing of the past few weeks.
Over your steaming mugs, Rina explains to you that she has come to the liberating realization that the show will in fact go on without her.
Her stint in Paris, as fun and fabulous as it was, also made her lonely, and once she was confident the theatre company she was collaborating with would do her work justice without her helicoptering over them, Rina immediately booked the first flight to you.
She plans to stick around for an undetermined period of time, as long as you’ll have her, if you’re okay with that—duh, you tell her with a flick to the forehead—and then go home to her boyfriend for a much-needed hiatus from theatre.
Rina tells you everything about Paris: the sightseeing, the shopping. Her show, the reaction it garnered. In return, you give her all of the gory details about Yoongi. All of them, because she’ll sense it if you leave anything out.
You tell her about the night in his studio, how you deliberated and deliberated until you finally gave in, and how you were rewarded with Yoongi’s head between your thighs, eating you out like a man starved.
You tell her about the horribly inappropriate and ridiculously hot sexting that took place in your open floor plan office, how he described in detail what he was going to do to you when he finally got the chance. You hand your phone over without a fight when she demands to read the messages herself, staring down into your mug as she screeches with delight while reading.
You tell her about last night, how Yoongi made good on all of his promises and then some. How he took his time learning the cues of your body. And about the kimchijeon, because it’s really unfair that Yoongi seems to be good at everything.
Rina whistles lowly, raising an eyebrow at you as she takes a long sip of her coffee.
“Okay, I really need to meet him now,” she says.
“There was a weird moment,” you lament, sinking into the couch. “I might be overthinking—”
“Most likely—”
“But, there was definitely a moment,” you continue, firm. You know what you saw. “I got this killer opportunity at work to write about this producer, and Yoongi knows him, so I asked him to put in a good word for me, and he, like, froze up for a second. I don’t know.”
“Was that before or after he fucked your brains out?”
You snort, mumbling into your coffee as you go for a sip. “Between.”
“Okay, so, he’s probably over it if he went back for seconds,” Rina reasons, shrugging. “Why don’t you just ask him about it?”
You shake your head. “If he’s moved past it, I don’t want to bring it up again and risk popping the sex bubble we’re in,” you say. “You’re right, I’m probably overthinking. Yoongi’s Yoongi. He would’ve said no if he really wasn’t cool with it.”
Rina hums, nodding sagely. “Don’t pop the sex bubble,” she agrees. “It’s your job, anyway. Using your connections. I’m sure he’s dealt with reporters before, being who he is. He probably gets it.”
Your phone buzzes, and you set your mug down to fish it out from between the couch cushions. “Yeah.”
Speak of the devil.
Once you grab hold of your phone, you’re greeted with a text from Yoongi. It seems he’s been busy since your abrupt departure.
[11:58] Yoongi: Spoke to Yijeong. He’s going to be at a label party tonight and he’s down to meet you if you’ll go. I’ll take you.
And then, another.
[11:58] Yoongi: Kind of a fancy thing, though. Cocktail attire. Lmk.
Normally you’d dread everything he’s proposing—uncomfortable shoes at a party where you don’t know a soul wouldn’t be your first choice for a Saturday night—but you find yourself biting your lip to mask the stupid grin forming on your face. You’re getting your interview and there’s a high possibility you’ll get to see Yoongi in a suit? Everything’s coming up Y/N.
You lift your gaze from your phone to Rina, who looks at you expectantly.
“Bring any dresses back with you from Paris?”
★ ★ ★
When Yoongi swings by to pick you up hours later, you’re more than a little grateful you share a dress size with your best friend.
Rina did, in fact, bring dresses back with her from Paris, and the second this particular one slipped onto your body she had no choice but to declare that it was yours.
It’s just your style—black, simple, form-fitting enough that you look fucking good in it, but long enough to wear to what is essentially a work event. Lace detailing on the bodice. A teasing slit up the side. And it’s from Paris, and while you don’t particularly love the French for much, they can make a damn garment. Yeah, you want to be buried in this dress.
Yoongi leans against the door jamb, not the slightest bit subtle as his eyes rake over you. You smirk to yourself as you bend down to get your heels on.
“Pretty dress,” he says, though his tone does little to mask what he’s really thinking. Fuck the party. Under any other circumstances, you’d agree, but duty calls.
“It’s hers,” you say, standing upright and jerking your chin back in Rina’s direction. Rina, who is lingering in your kitchen, very obviously exercising all of her restraint not to crowd Yoongi right now and inspect him like a toy.
“It’s yours,” she corrects, gritting the words out. Good thing you made her promise to be normal.
You take a moment to look at Yoongi, who, to your delight, is wearing a suit. Black, like your dress. What a pair the two of you make.
“You clean up nice,” you say, drinking in the sight of him just as shamelessly as he did to you. Letting your eyes speak for you.
The suit is simple, also like your dress, but the long lines accentuate his legs, making him look taller. Crisp white shirt. Black tie. Hair styled out of his face. He looks good, and he knows it. You can tell in the way he’s carrying himself.
Yoongi hums, smirking. “So I’ve heard.” He glances behind you, at Rina, and then back at you. “The playwright? Rina?”
You nod, surprised that he was able to recall her name.
He looks back at Rina, smiling at her. “How was Paris?”
The memory on this man.
“Great,” Rina says tightly. You’re almost proud of her.
“I’m Yoongi,” he says, eyebrow raising at the weird tension wafting from your kitchen.
“I’ve heard so much about you,” she says emphatically, and you snort.
“Ah.” You note that the tips of Yoongi’s ears are pink. Yours would be too, if you were in a room with two people who discussed the way you fuck in-depth. “Good things, I hope.”
“Ready to go?” you chirp as you grab your bag, taking pity on Rina. Any more and she’ll snap, you’re sure of it.
Yoongi nods and steps back into the hallway, allowing you to slip out the door.
“Nice to meet you,” he calls to Rina as you shut the door, and then you’re both moving.
★ ★ ★
The ride to the party itself is uneventful. Although you’re giddy at the confirmation that the sex bubble has indeed remained unpopped, the second you’re seated in Yoongi’s car you shift into work mode.
The tiny notepad you’d stuffed in your bag is now clutched in your hand, and the near silence in the car is only interrupted with the occasional question or clarification on something you’ve jotted down in your research on Yijeong. Yoongi answers to the best of his knowledge, supplementing where he can, but it’s clear you’ve done your due diligence. You’re ready.
Yoongi’s car comes to a crawl, and you peer out the window at the outrageous mansion he’s brought you to. You’d barely been paying attention when he’d stopped at the gate to give his name for entry, but now that you’re here, you’re struck by the luxury that awaits you on the other side of the passenger door.
A huge, freshly manicured lawn. Equally manicured shrubbery. A neon-lit fountain in the middle of the driveway, right in front of the imposing entryway to the biggest house you’ve ever seen in person. Modern, sleek architecture composing the monolith before you.
Yoongi hops out of the car to walk around to the passenger side and open the door for you. He helps you out, steadying you as your heels connect with the gravel beneath you.
The house is clearly bustling with people, music seeping out into the night as partygoers filter in and out, as others gather on the balconies (plural!) for cigarettes.
“Whose party is this?” you ask, amazed as Yoongi hands his keys off to the valet—a valet, at somebody’s home.
“Bang Si-Hyuk,” Yoongi says as he watches his car depart without him, clearly not sharing your amazement. Right, you remind yourself. He’s used to this kind of thing. You, however, feel horribly out of your element, even in your Parisian dress.
He offers you his arm and you take it, staring down at your feet as you walk through the gravel so as not to twist your ankle. You can do this. Networking opportunities galore.
The doors to Bang Si-Hyuk’s mansion are opened for the both of you by the two men flanking it, revealing the party unfolding inside. You gawk, clutching your bag and the notebook inside of it, as Yoongi takes your free hand. He gives it a small squeeze before guiding you past the foyer, past clusters of celebrities and executives, caterers balancing trays of tiny hors d'oeuvres, all the way to the bar.
When prompted, Yoongi, predictably, orders an old fashioned. You opt for a vodka martini, something to quell the nerves mounting inside of you. You’ve come a long way from plastic cups of cheap beer at a Western bar, it seems.
The bartender procures your drinks, sliding them over to the both of you on cocktail napkins, and Yoongi clinks his glass against yours.
“You look like you’re going to shit yourself,” he says, grinning into his glass and taking a swig.
“I hate you,” you mumble in kind, letting the vodka warm your throat as you take a sip of your own. “Remind me again why you live in our apartment complex?”
“Because I’m not Bang Si-Hyuk,” he says simply, setting his drink down as a woman with long, sleek hair in a slinky dress approaches the both of you, though her eyes are focused on Yoongi.
She’s gorgeous. You recognize her, but your memory fails you as you come up short on her name.
“Min Yoongi, as I live and breathe,” she says with a dazzling grin as Yoongi extends his arm out to clasp her hand. She takes hold of his easily and doesn’t let go as she continues speaking in a familiar tone. Hm. “What a surprise.”
“Noona,” Yoongi says, mouth quirking up at the corners as he turns his head to you, his hand still clasped in hers. “Y/N, this is Shin Suran.”
Suran like the singer, your brain helpfully pieces together. You’ve heard her songs on the radio before, read about her in Look Here long before you started. She had a single years back that charted like crazy, a single that you personally own. She’s done a song with Dean before. And she seems to know Yoongi very well, based on the way she’s still touching him. Something stirs in your gut.
Suran’s attention finally turns towards you, her hand leaving Yoongi’s at last as she reaches out to shake yours. You set your glass down on the bar behind you, wipe the condensation off on your dress as discreetly as you can.
“Y/N,” she says, tilting her head at you as you take her offered hand and shake. “It’s lovely to meet you.”
“You as well. I loved ‘Wine,’” you respond, politely extricating your hand to pick up your glass and take another sip of your drink. It’s true, you did love ‘Wine’ when it came out, and despite your distaste for this interaction in general, Suran is supremely talented, there’s no denying it. Not to mention a potential connection for you, thanks to Yoongi.
Suran laughs, her eyes crinkling in the corners. “I appreciate that,” she says warmly before glancing at Yoongi. “Although, that song wouldn’t have existed if it weren’t for Yoongi-yah.”
…Huh?
It clicks then, your brain coming online in an instant.
Yoongi, your Yoongi—the one who lives down the hall from you, who sends you cat videos while you’re at work, who calls you baby when he fucks you��is Suga. 2017 Hot Trend Award winner Suga. Over one hundred KOMCA credits to his name Suga. That he’s not just your Yoongi, but very likely one of the most famous people in this room. That he might’ve been Suran’s Yoongi, too, at one point.
You’d known that he was famous, sure. You’d been to his studio, seen the awards on the wall, although you’d been to preoccupied with wanting to fuck him to actually read them. His studio setup alone told you that he had money, not to mention the paid driver he sent you, the small flashes of luxury in his otherwise humble apartment. But this…
You realize, to add insult to injury, that the song filtering through the speakers right now is his.
“Noona,” Yoongi says, his eyes locked on you as he speaks, although you sure as hell aren’t his noona. “We’ll catch up with you later.”
You barely catch their goodbyes, picking up your martini to stare into as Suran departs.
“Y/N,” Yoongi says softly.
“You didn’t tell me you were Suga.”
The name feels weighty on your tongue. You don’t know why it bothers you so much, that you didn’t know. That he didn’t tell you outright. But it does.
Yoongi shifts from one foot to the other awkwardly, his body stiff next to yours.
“You didn’t ask,” he mumbles. “It’s not like I was hiding it from you.”
“Seems like the kind of thing to lead with,” you mumble back, taking a long swig, letting the alcohol burn on its way down.
“Yeah, I don’t make a habit of doing that,” he says. You lift your head to look at him at the bitter tone in his voice, trying to decipher the look on his face, but you’re at a loss. You’re beginning to realize just how little you know about your neighbor. Your friend. Your… Well, he’s more than that now, isn’t he?
How many details about Yoongi have you let slip from your memory, while he seems to hold on to every little thing he learns about you?
He polishes off his drink and sets his glass down, pulling his phone from his back pocket to send off a text, not looking up from the screen as he speaks. “Ready to meet Yijeong?”
You sigh, suddenly right back where you were last night when you asked him about Yijeong in the first place, but you nod. “Yeah.”
At the responding buzz, Yoongi pockets his phone and wordlessly leads you through the party. You ignore the way your hand in his feels more like a necessary evil this time around.
★ ★ ★
Jang Yijeong is remarkably handsome, tall and lithe in his suit as he puffs on a cigarette. Meeting him isn’t nearly as nerve wracking as you’d thought, although you’re sure you have Yoongi to thank for that.
As soon as you step foot on the balcony, your brain shifts back into work mode with little effort. You watch as Yoongi and Yijeong greet each other with a hug, which you didn’t expect, and they immediately fall into a rapport that can only come from years of familiarity. Yoongi said he knew Yijeong, but he conveniently left out the fact that they’re, like, besties or something. They’re getting a little annoying, these omissions of Yoongi’s.
Mercifully, Yoongi seems eager to get out of your way as soon as possible. According to Yijeong, he and Yoongi have been working closely for the past month, so he’s kind of sick of looking at his face anyway.
After a muttered, almost fond ‘go fuck yourself’ from Yoongi, he’s leaving you in Yijeong’s care, both of you sitting on the patio furniture kindly provided by Bang Si-Hyuk on the balcony.
“So,” your interviewee starts, taking a drag from his cigarette. “You must be pretty special, getting Yoongi-yah to make an appearance at one of these things.” He gestures at the fanfare through the balcony doors with his free hand.
“I’m not here to talk about me,” you say shyly, balancing your notepad on your knee as you set your phone to record and slide it onto the table between you, next to an ornate ashtray. “I’m here to talk about you.”
“Very nice,” Yijeong hums, amused. “I’m serious, though. I’ve been going to these since I debuted. Album release parties, award ceremonies, anything I could get an invite to. But I haven’t seen Yoongi at one in years. He hates this shit.”
“When I made the switch to producing, I practically begged him to come out of hiding and be my plus-one. He’s been producing for way longer. He knows the people at these things, knows how to work them if he has to,” he continues. “Yoongi and I have been friends for a long time. He’s practically my brother. But I couldn’t get him to say yes.”
Nothing about that tracks. Yoongi and Yijeong, if your math is mathing correctly, have known each other for the better part of a decade. You’ve only known Yoongi for a month and a half. If he’s as much of a hermit as Yijeong insists, why would he do this for you if Yijeong couldn’t get him to budge?
You think about Suran and how surprised she seemed to see Yoongi. You think about the text you got this afternoon, how he didn’t give any indication that going to this party was outside of his comfort zone. Another omission, except this time you don’t feel annoyance, but something else entirely. Something you don’t dare name. You shift in your seat.
“I’m just saying,” he says warmly, ashing his cigarette in the tray between you, meeting your eyes. “You must be special.”
You don’t know what to say in response, and you know it shows. Yijeong laughs at whatever expression he finds on your face, warmth blooming in your cheeks as your eyes burn holes in the notepad on your knee.
“Okay, okay,” he says, grinning and raising his hands up in surrender. “Do your worst. It’s been a few years since I’ve done this, so I might be a little rusty. But for you, mystery girl, I’m an open book.”
Yijeong speaks to you like an old friend. He tells you about how he fell in love with singing in the fourth grade, when he sang ‘Azalea’ by Maya in front of the eommas and appas of his peers and got a taste of what it’s like to sing for an audience. He opens up to you about losing control of his own voice during his career as an idol, how he didn’t know what was wrong, was wracked with fear over it.
He tells you about becoming friends with Yoongi, about being taken under his wing to learn a whole new skill and take a new direction with his career. How Yoongi opened a door for him that he didn’t even know existed. You learn that Yijeong has been collaborating with Yoongi for years now without drawing too much attention to it, but now that he can stand alone, he’s ready to step back into the limelight as EL CAPITXN.
You get so enraptured in the conversation, dutifully scribbling notes and asking follow-up questions, that you barely notice that over half an hour has passed by.
“Y/N,” Yijeong says, smiling at you as he wraps up his answer to your last question. You don’t know how to explain it, but it makes so much sense to you that this man is Yoongi’s friend. Maybe it’s the warmth in his voice. “You should probably go rescue Yoongi-yah from those leeches inside.”
“Yeah,” you agree, biting back a smile at the thought of Yoongi braving rookie idols and sleazy executives, trying to find a wall to hug while he waits. For you. He’s doing this for your career, for you. “It was lovely to meet you, Yijeong.”
“The pleasure was all mine,” Yijeong insists, watching you knowingly as you pack up your notepad and pen, moving to stand. “Y/N-ah,” he calls, making you pause at the balcony door. “Treat him well, okay?”
Something that you’ve been ignoring for a long time unfurls in your chest.
“I will,” you promise softly.
You push the balcony door open, your heartbeat thrumming in your ears as you make your way back to the bar. You will rescue Yoongi, want nothing more than to be with him again, but you need the liquid courage now more than ever.
Here’s what you know: You have spent the last three years terrified of falling. Starving yourself from the full breadth of friendship, of intimacy, of love, because of what happened the last time you let yourself have it. You’ve convinced yourself that any man that claims interest in you would do the same in the long run, that being career-driven is a deterrent to love and nobody will ever accept you for who you are.
But you also know this: Yoongi sees you. He understands you. Unlike your ex, he doesn’t feel hurt when you disappear for days on end, lost in your work, because he’s very likely doing the same. And yet he still finds time to read everything that gets published under your name. He offers his studio as a safe haven for you to write when the words stop flowing in your own office. He goes to parties he’d normally rather die than attend just so you can get an interview, because it’s important to you.
You don’t want to starve anymore. Min Yoongi has been staring you in the face for the past month and a half, offering you everything you’ve been scared of since your ex left you three years ago, all alone in a strange city. Offering you all of his support and kindness and closeness like a filling meal. And for the first time in a very long time, you want to try and take a bite.
Terrifyingly, you really, really fucking like him. Not just as a friend.
You finish your martini quickly before weaving through the crowd to find Yoongi. And you do, leaning against the furthest wall. Drink in hand, just like the night you met.
When you approach, he lifts his head and your heart soars when your eyes meet.
“Ready to go?” he asks, none the wiser to your sudden change of heart.
“Yeah,” you breathe. “Yeah, let’s go.”
★ ★ ★
You barely make it into your shared hallway before you’re on Yoongi, your body pressing against his and your arms looped around his neck as you pull him into a searing kiss. He tastes like whiskey, and normally you’d hate that, but it tastes all the more sweet because it’s on Yoongi’s lips.
It’s so different, now that you’re allowing yourself to really feel it. You fit together so perfectly. His lips feel so right on yours. How could you have been so blind before?
You expect Yoongi to press you against the wall, or slide his hands up the skirt of your dress, or groan your name into your mouth like he can’t get enough of you. You know you can’t get enough of him. In his suit, waiting to be unwrapped like a present.
You want Yoongi to do those things, desperately. You want to pay attention properly this time, you want not to shy away from the intimacy of it all. You want whispered praise in your ear, eye contact while he fucks you, his lips on yours and his stilted moan as he spills inside of you. You want the softness that comes after, for him to clean you up with care and wrap you in his arms. You want to sleep in his bed for a reason other than exhaustion.
But instead, Yoongi pulls away, grasping your shoulders gently as he creates distance between you. You look up at him, confused.
“Rina’s probably waiting for you,” he says.
“I promise you, she’s not,” you snort. Rina knows better than to expect you home before morning at the earliest. You surge forward, leaning up to chase his lips again, but he remains out of reach.
“Y/N…” Conflicted.
Right. Of course, duh! You’re getting ahead of yourself.
You forgot, in the haze of your epiphany, that your last conversation with Yoongi didn’t exactly bode well for your sex bubble. You need to set the record straight, then.
“Yoongi, if this is about earlier… the Suga thing,” you start, leaning in to pepper kisses down his neck, your fingers coming up to fiddle with his tie, loosening it. “I’m not mad, okay?”
Yoongi shakes his head, running his hand through his hair. “No, I just…” He trails off, sighing. “Maybe this wasn’t a good idea, Y/N. The friends with benefits thing.”
You freeze.
Dread fills you instantly, replacing all of the warmth that had been inhabiting your body just moments before.
Why now? What’s changed? You know what’s changed for you, but it can’t be the same for him if he’s pulling away from you like this.
Yoongi gently removes your hand from his tie, takes a step back from you. Crushes all of your hope with his next words.
“I just don’t know if I can do this with you.”
With you.
“Oh,” you breathe. You feel like you’re going to cry. The beginnings of tears are already welling up in your eyes, and you do your best to blink them away.
“I’m sorry.”
You shake your head. “Don’t be,” you say, forcing your expression to remain neutral. “I appreciate your honesty.”
“I still want to be your friend, Y/N,” Yoongi says, his voice pained, like he can see right through you. You wish he’d stop. “Please.”
“Yeah,” you say, your own voice breaking just a little. You don’t want to cry in front of him. Fuck that. “I’m gonna go home. See you.”
Before he has a chance to say anything else, you’re speedwalking to your apartment, fishing your keys out hurriedly to unlock it and rush in.
Once you’re inside, you lean back against the door, sliding down until you’re sitting on the floor. It feels so similar to the night you met him—running away from him in the hallway, feeling like you can’t breathe once you’re on the other side of the door. Too bad it’s so, so different.
At the sound of the door, Rina comes out from your bedroom, Pepper in tow.
“Y/N? Is that you? I thought for sure you’d be getting dicked down right about n—” You watch her stop in her tracks at the sight of you, her expression laden with concern. “Y/N? What’s wrong?”
“There are strings,” you sniffle, looking up at your best friend with watery eyes. “And it’s my fault.”
“Oh, Y/N,” Rina breathes, setting Pepper down and immediately joining you on the floor, wrapping her arms around you.
Your mind flashes back to three years ago, in a position not all that different from this one. But that was for a relationship, one that lasted years. One that you foolishly assumed was heading for marriage. Why does this hurt just as much? Why did Yoongi nestle himself into the softest, most vulnerable parts of you just to rip himself away at the last second?
You finally allow yourself to cry.
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Sick Days & Cancelled Dates
summary — poor bobby passing the nasty bug onto you, meaning you lay in bed on a hot summer’s day. don’t worry, you won’t be alone, not for long…
warnings — jacob thomas seresin’s eyes, fluff, disgusting niceness, cooking, mentions of food, no use of y/n, slight tension, more nice stuff, it’s just a cute little one shot really
word count — 1k words
so i completely gave up on adding pictures to this one because i just wanted to get it published but i hope you get the gist. sorry that it took so bloody long to publish, i’ve been insanely busy but hopefully i can get some stuff out every once in a while. hope you all like it and feel free to lmk if you guys want sick jake or dagger squad too xx
the love olympics masterlist.
Waking up with a sore throat you’d instantly felt the telltale signs of a cold as you closed your eyes, laying back in bed with a dramatic groan. Who even gets a cold in summer?
Flashbacks flip through your mind as you roll onto your side burying yourself under the bedsheets, replaying the moment you delivered Bob, a very sick Bob, some homemade soup a couple of days ago. It had only been for a second and yet he’d somehow managed to pass the cold onto you. You still loved him but times like these you hated that Bob got ill so easily.
Falling back asleep, you decided was the best course of action, or it would’ve been if you hadn’t heard a pair of very familiar footsteps running up the staircase to your bedroom waking you up, not even half an hour later. It was definitely a terrible idea to give him a key.
Hiding in your duvet burrito, you grabbed a pillow and flung it in the general direction of the noise in your room, smiling when you heard a dramatic ‘ow’ when you made contact. It was definitely worth the sacrifice of your pillow and the extra comfort. Especially when he fell to the floor as if he’d been acting out a death scene in a play in high school, typical Jake. It did however, make you wonder if he could’ve been a theatre kid..maybe in another life. You smiled as you drifted off to sleep again with the thoughts of actor Jake in your mind.
Seresin, assessing the situation (poking at your body until you yelled at him to tell him to leave you alone because you were sick), decided to go back downstairs to make you something to eat. He had been greatly worried since you were late for the day out you’d planned together and hadn’t answered your phone so he called Bradley who told him to kindly leave him alone on his day off and reminded him to use the key you’d given Jake for emergencies. So that’s exactly what he did…
A couple of hours later, you shuffled downstairs, refusing to give up your burrito of warmth just yet, to meet a snoring Jake on your couch, Mamma Mia playing in the background. The delicious smell wafting from the kitchen made your stomach rumble but you felt bad eating without him so you jumped on top of his sleeping body on the couch, effectively waking him up.
In hindsight, you should’ve anticipated his reflexes grabbing hold of your body which had unraveled from the duvet, holding you closer to him than either of you expected.
“Morning,” you sent a soft reply back, far too flustered from the position you were both in as well as his morning voice. Jake’s hand reached up to move a couple of wild strands of hair away from your forehead as he checked your temperature with the back of his hand with a gentle hum on his voice, “still a little warm but better than before”. You nodded in reply, a little entranced by the flecks of gold in the green of his eyes.
Jake noticed. He always notices. Or more accurately, he always notices you. His grip on your body tightened ever so slightly as he let himself get lost in the moment before gently moving your body off his. He shook his head lightly, reminding himself that he was only here to outdo you on the dates and win (you over), nothing more, nothing less.
You took a minute to breathe, gaining your composure before following him into the kitchen where he began heating and plating up the food he’d prepared.
“So Chef Seresin, what have you prepared for me today?”
“Well Chef, today we’ve got a classic Seresin household Sick Day Soup, I can’t tell you the ingredients because it’s a secret recipe, if I tell you it won’t work. Oh and a cheese toastie made from that sourdough loaf from the market that you like.”
Your eyes widened at that because you definitely didn’t have a single slice of bread in your apartment until that moment so that must have meant that- you punched Jake in the arm, the ‘ow’ was justified for him being too nice and driving an hour to go to your favourite market. God the urge to kiss him or punch him again was getting harder by each passing second.
Jake, sensing some sort of inner turmoil within you chose to move himself to a slightly safer area by grabbing the dishes and moving them to the coffee table, placing a gentle kiss on your forehead as he moved past you.
After you’d both eaten yourselves into a delicious food coma, and Jake had washed the dishes, much to your chagrin, you felt a wave of fatigue rush over you just as he’d appeared with a bunch of painkillers and cold medicine and a glass of water.
“Thank you for today, I really appreciate it. You didn’t have to-” you stopped yourself having seen the look in his eyes, “but thank you. I saw the picnic basket in the kitchen and I’m sorry for ruining your plans. We can still go out if you want, I feel so much better, plus I just took the medicine.”
He sighed sadly at that, you weren’t ruining anything, and Jake made sure to take the time to tell you that before carrying you up to your bedroom. He definitely didn’t have to do that but you honestly did not mind one bit.
Waking up a couple of hours later, you discovered a bouquet of flowers arranged in a vase in your kitchen, as well as a note in his flowy handwriting mentioning that dinner was in the oven waiting to be heated up. The huge smile on your face wasn’t going to disappear any time soon.
Good thing you got to return he favour the next day with Jake soon catching the bug along with the other aviators in quick succession after that.
tags — @waklman @sematarygirls @djs8891 @kmc1989 @dempy message/comment to be added to the tag list xx
#drew writes!#tlo#adventures of chickadee and loverboy ⭐️#jake seresin#jake seresin x you#jake seresin x reader#jake seresin fanfiction#jake seresin fic#jake seresin drabble#jake hangman x reader#jake hangman x you#jake seresin fluff#jake hangman imagine#jake hangman seresin#top gun fanfiction#top gun maverick
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ASMR Boyfriend {Felix X Reader 18+}
→ Warnings: Wholesome boio
→ Rating: 18+ Minors are prohibited from engaging and reading this content. It contains explicit content.
→ Genre: Fulfilling fantasy's
→ Summary: You feel rather lonely and clingy. Felix thankfully has a day off. But he ends up getting called into work. So your search the web to find something to watch. Ending up finding his ASMR's. Which he feels conflicted about you watching...
→ Word Count: 2 768
Disclaimer: All members are face and name claims for the story. This is entirely a work of fiction and by no means is meant to be a projection, judgment or representation of real-life people. All works are purely for entertainment purposes.
Published: 5/24/23
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A late Saturday morning gray and rainy with the fresh smell of spring. The dark sky enhancing the fresh life. The comfy smell of summer not too far away. Long blonde strands of hair clung to the charcoal sheets. Pushing his untamed hair out of his beautiful face. The comforting warmth next to me, Staring at every beautiful detail of him. The way his freckles decorated his face or his eyelashes casted a slight shadow. His sharp yet soft features.
“Yes?” Felix’s deep groggy voice questioned, eyes closed. Startled, unaware he was awake. My movements froze as he grabbed my wrist. I could’ve sworn he was asleep. His doe eyes lazily opened meeting mine as he turned to face me.
“Sorry. Did I wake you?”
“No no.. I can always tell when someone is watching me. mmm.. It’s an idol thing I think.” Felix chuckled after a yawn. Pushing back his he slid on his thin black glasses with a groan. Sitting up right, I followed suit. Attempting to fix my hair as well. Felix noticed and tucked a stray behind my ear. His Sharp lips turned to a sweet smile. “Coffee?”
I nodded in response. Felix smiled back tiredly. He had been working late into last night. Yet he was the one who was about to go cook. Stretching, he walked off toward the kitchen. Trailing out from the warm sheets to the bitter cold of the hard wood floors. I followed him. Felix’s white button up nearly fell off his frame. The shirt hanging from my shoulder, most likely his as well.
We met in the kitchen, he ruffled his unstyled hair and stretched with a groan. I slid behind him wrapping my arms around his lean form. My face lay on his tense shoulders. A huffed laugh escaped him.
"Don't wanna be alone today hm?" Felix held my hands, resting under his chest. The switch on the coffee machine lit up blue, fresh dark coffee filled the room.
"Mmmm.. no." I replied, hugging him tighter. The smell of hot coffee on this cold day woke me up even the tiniest bit. Felix chuckled and poured the hot liquid into two white cups. Mixing in just the right amount of milk and sugar. Eventually letting my death grip go I took a sip of the drink. Felix's arm swung around my shoulder. While I nearly guzzled the sweet coffee. Felix’s soft gaze looked at me as he sipped his drink. Meeting his smile, I did the same, smiling at my ray of sunshine. Leaning down he kissed my forehead. Enjoying each other's warmth on this cold morning. Until something drew our attention away from each other. Vibrating from the bedroom. Not long after a familiar ringtone began to play.
“I better check that.” Felix sighed, slid down the hall through our open bedroom door. Small chatter between him and the other person on the end of the line. From the bits of english and dynamic I could quickly tell it was Bang Chan on the other end. Waddling over with my cup in hand. I leaned on the white door frame. Felix ruffled the back of his shaggy blonde hair again. “So you need me there?”
“It’d be a huge help.” Chan’s voice was strained on the other end. The air fell quiet. Enough to hear the rain pounding on the roof. Felix’s thoughtful gaze met mine, seemingly asking if he could go. Nodding at him hesitantly. Since Felix was busy working, I hardly saw him. But I knew Chan needed this if he was asking himself. Chan’s voice broke me and Felix's longful stares aimed toward each other. “Felix? You there?”
“Y-yeah. I’ll be there in five.”
“ I’m so sorry to call you on your day off man. Really. Thanks.”
“No problem.” Felix hung up and sulked over to me. “ I’m sorry, I know I promised this weekend we’d-”
“It’s ok. You and I both know if Chan was asking. He needs it.” I placed a finger over his soft lips then left the room. He went off to get dressed. I finished the coffee when he returned. Wearing a big black sweater and pale ripped jeans. His hair tied back in a half ponytail. The thin framed glasses making the look. Felix came over beside me again wrapping his warm arms around me. Squeezing us together. “I don't know how long I'll be. But I promise when I get back we can do whatever you want ok?”
I nodded, A quick peck to my lips, Waving, grabbing a black umbrella he rushed out the door.
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The sky, still gray. The house, cold. I was perched at Felix’s computer set up, headphones on. Scrolling uselessly on YouTube or staring out at the rain. Wondering how Felix was doing. It was roughly twelve by the time we woke up this morning. It was now roughly seven and I was still clingy. Leaning back in his comfy desk chair, my knees resting in front of my chest. Clicking off the video I had been watching brought me back to the home page. noticing something new. A very familiar face on a thumbnail.
"Felix of Stray Kids ASMR. Huh..?" Instantly clicking on it. He had never mentioned this or neither had I seen it. I pretty well always stayed up to date with their content. Felix was smiling and talking sweetly to STAY. Whispering and using the cute props provided to make relaxing sounds. He was actually rather good at it. Finding myself relaxed by his warm yet deep voice. In missing him so much I decided to search for any other videos. To my luck there were a few. Something within me, somewhat excited by the sound of his low whispers in my ears. Though he was saying sweet words, my mind would easily drift.
In an attempt to do something other than stare at a screen I finally closed YouTube after streaming all of his ASMR uploads. About to spin the huge chair away from the screen. Something drew me back to the LED screen again. Felix had other tabs open. He was usually good to close after he was working. I didn't fully realize I was watching under his private account. Though I knew he wouldn't have minded. Knowing Felix usually showed me what he was working on. I browsed the file.
Clicking on the file I took the separate laptop connected to the set up and brought it out of his studio. To the bed, cozy and warm like it had been earlier when Felix was home. But without his sweet smile. The rain, still coming down a decent amount. Due to the silence you could almost hear the single drops hit the metal balcony outside the glass door. Our plants had been growing in the recent nice weather, now most likely drowned in the heavy rain fall. Sighing as I searched his files after flopping on the bed. Before I found his second most recent edited file.
“An ASMR folder? Those other ones Felix had done were collabs. So is this his own work? ” I tried to calculate how he would have had the chance to work on these without me noticing. Nonetheless I clicked the most recent file. With no video feed or image attached. It was titled: Your Barista. I was quick to realize once the audio had started playing, Felix was the barista in the situation. odd. Wasn't ASMR supposed to be relaxing sounds? This sounded more similar to a story read out loud. Despite my confusion I continued listening. He was rather adorable. The sound of his small chuckle after a few friendly comments. Closing my eyes and just listening I could nearly imagine the situation.
“What would you like to drink?” “Coffee? Haha. sure thing. I won't be long.” “Here you are F/N!”
I sat up in shock and paused the audio. Flailing around on the charcoal sheets like a fan girl.
“Did he.. Use my name? What is going on?” After a moment of panic and tinted cheeks. I was debating on listening further. “So. Clearly. He made this.. About me..? Should I really keep listening..?”
My eyes drifted back to the media player on his laptop. Huffing as I anxiously hit the spacebar. Closing my eyes again, headphones on. laying back onto the bed as the sheets consumed me. Imagining the scenario with Felix. To my surprise by the end of the audio there were a few imagined kisses exchanged between us. The butterflies in my stomach were not really soft anymore. It was more like desperate disorderly flapping. Taking off my headphones for a moment, taking in all I just heard. Felix’s beautiful voice whispering in my ears. Grabbing a pillow I buried my face in it. While doing so another file started playing. Pillow in hand I reached over to the laptop to see the title: You drive.
“Oh? A new song? Wow this seems-”
'Hey, Love~'
Felix’s insanely deep morning voice burst through my headphones. My eyes shot wide open. So. This was another ASMR audio. Already this one seemed like.. A lot more than the first one to say the least. I certainly wasn't complaining.
'You sleep well? Hm?' 'Hm~ Good to hear.' More kisses. My heart was in no way planning to be still anytime soon. The rest of what I had been listening to wasn't an unusual weekend morning routine for us. Me clinging onto Felix and cuddling him. But the switch was quickly flipped.
(Spice)
'Mm? You're more than just.. Clingy. Aren't you..?~' 'C’mon. Answer me love~' Felix’s voice teased me.
“M-maybe..” I spoke submissively into the empty air knowing full well he wouldn't hear me.
'Well, not that I mind. Helping you.. That is. I’m still sleepy. I might need you to… help me out.'
My hands flew to my mouth. Staring at the audio scroll through the audio. Quickly feeling the warmth across my face in my equally sweaty hands. For the most part. This audio was similar to our mornings. Other than.. Felix saying.. That.. wait. Was this.. One of his desires..? It is something we have never done before.. My mind spiraled at the thought of basically recreating this concept. It’s like Felix had predicted what I was feeling before I even knew it. My focus snapped back to the audio. Heated kisses filled the silence.
‘Mng~ Like that. C’mon don't be shy. You got it.'
I could hear Felix's sly smile behind those words. Behind this black screen he was hiding behind. My stomach, doing backflips and my whole body got hot against the cold air.
“Hey, I’m home. Sorry that it took so long..” Felix trailed off as he met my gaze from the doorway. I whipped off my headphones. As they plopped uselessly beside me. His sweet face went pale the moment he looked down at my lap. Glancing at his laptop on my lap, then he cocked his brow slightly. “What.. are you doing on there..?”
“N-nothing!”
“Mind if I see what was playing on my laptop then?” Felix retorted slowly coming over. Like a cat stalking its prey. Unsure if I was supposed to hear these. Not to mention the fact I was getting all worked up over only his voice. Felix attempted to take the Laptop from me but I pulled it away after shutting it. So embarrassing! If he knew how much I was enjoying that audio. Some shuffling around on the bed as he reached to grab it from me. Amidst the chaos he was on top of me. Strands of his silky hair dangled in our view. Pinning my hands down with one of his above my head, he grabbed the laptop from my pleading grasp. The burning embarrassing guilt hit me.
'Miss me hm?~'
The audio asked into the silent air. My eyes shut tight in embarrassment. I peaked one eye open and Felix’s face was bright red. More flustered than I had ever seen him before. His eyes not meeting mine. Another moan arose in the air from the laptop. His eyes shot wide open as he quickly leaped off my form, Swinging the screen shut. Felix sat defeated after sliding the laptop to the far side of the bed. His hand placed anxiously on the nap of his neck.
“W-what all did you hear..?” Felix questioned not meeting my gaze still. His blonde hair hides his expression from me. Sitting up beside him, our legs dangled off the bed. His ears were even tinted a hot shade of pink.
“A few..”
“Which ones?” Remarking back instantly, Finally he met my gaze. Though it wasn't what I had been expecting. His doe eyes were seemingly filled with determination. Though not contrasting well with the pink that laced his cute freckles. I had failed to come up with words as I stared. Felix got impatient and once again pinned me down. Leaning closer to my trapped form. Words trickling off his tongue. “W-why were you continuing to listen..?”
A bolt of hot lightning struck me at his last question. I broke free of his fragile hold. My hands were now at either side of his head. Catching wind of the initial shock in his eyes.
“Alright! I’ll admit it! I saw one by mistake on your computer after watching all of your ASMR collab uploads. I happened to notice one I hadn't seen posted and watched it. Then another one started playing. I missed you. Your voice. So hearing you.. Call my name. Like that.. I couldn't stop watching..” I admitted truthfully as my fiery passion slowly lost its spark. Once our eyes met Felix sighed and covered his face. Mumbling through his hands.
“W-what.. Did you think..?”
What did I think?! That Those must have been a fantasy of some kind and I heard you act them out how you would want! But rather than saying that.. If I follow that last video I had been listening to. Felix hadn't looked at me since he had asked the question. I could tell quickly by his intense breath he was liking this. In the vulnerable position we were in, I slid my cold hands up the hem of his sweater. Feeling his bare abdomen. Felix jumped at the sly movement.
“Ah! Don't do.. That..so suddenly~” Felix whimpered out. The back of one of his hands flew to cover his mouth. Slightly blocking his protest. I sat myself on his lap and lifted his black sweat shirt to reveal his abs. Felix squirmed from underneath me. His glasses set off, his hair falling from his half tied up style. “Just what are you... getting at.? hm.?~”
Felix’s flushed cheeks graced with only what I knew as a lustful grin. His teeth tugged at his bottom lip as his tempting gaze met mine. The situation has seriously flipped since I initiated. Instead of Felix being all blushy. It was now me. His intense gaze was eyeing me down. That sly grin, hands resting at my hips. His swift motion left me breathless, My hands flew to his abdomen for balance.
“So that’s what you listened to huh..? Never thought you’d actually do this on your own.” Felix smirked. Every bone in my body that had held confidence broke. My head fell to rest on his nearly bare chest thanks to my prior fire. Felix chuckled and leaned toward my ear. Blowing his hot breath down my neck. “Did you like the sound of my voice, hm..? Calling out to you. Whispering to you.”
I dug my nails into his sweater trying to cling on to any reason I had left. I admitted defeat and nodded my head hesitantly at his question. As soon as he caught a fraction of my movement he pushed my hips down.
“You did miss me, hm?” Felix chuckled, in nearly a growl. He leaned back to my ear. “Well, not that I mind. Helping you.. That is. I’m awfully tired. I might need you to.. help me out with this F/N.~”
I nodded once again in defeat. The sound of us breathing heavily, the only sound against the rain. Us being so close made it once again seem not so cold.
"I had told you we could do what you wanted to do after I got back." Felix whispered in my ear. Leaving a few fluttered kisses on my neck. "I didn't think you’d want me.. to do you."
I nodded.
"Mmm. Show me how much you missed me."
A/N: I'm finally backkkk!! So sorry T.T" Examssss. Thank you all for the votes!!! XD pt.2??? O.o
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Chapter 1 - Insomnia (I'll Never Leave Your Side)
Summary: AGOTI is woken up by a nightmare and seeks comfort from his adoptive father. Solazar doesn't hesitate to attempt to make his child feel better but realizes the only way he can is quite... unconventional. Even after doing so, the night was filled with wonder as the two embark on an adventure...
Word count: 10,764
Character count: 60,904
Tobi talks: This was meant to come out much earlier so apologies for the late upload folks, I had to do some extra proof reading and corrections. This is a passionate project that took nearly two years to create (created back in 8/30/2021) and it's still ongoing! You won't have to wait such a long time as I have spent time on future chapters as well so those will be published much sooner rather than later. Be aware that just because this chapter is void of anything graphic or disturbing does not mean future chapters will not have mature themes present. Please enjoy the story and I thank you wholeheartedly for reading~♡
AO3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/49247710/chapters/12426553
A love letter to the ENTITY crew and its creator @sugarratio1
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Vigorous winds blew within the small confinements of the city and it had everyone cooped up in their homes to escape the harsh weather. It was booming and traveled well into the night, spilling into everyone’s nightly routine as the tiny town quieted down. Life had become stagnant, branches were pulled by the wind, and small puddles accumulated on the roads, undisturbed by the lack of roaring vehicles that would quickly cause them chaos. Contrary to popular belief, thunderstorms weren’t as aesthetically pleasing to everyone.
Inside a humble house inhabited a family of three, both children of which were fast asleep. One struggled, however. He was the youngest out of the nest, squirming in his sleep to try to escape the uncomfortable heat taking over his body. The digidevil child, Agoti, had patterns of sweat stitched into his forehead. With his blanket held hostage, he had no clue where his consciousness had taken him.
“Get away…” He mewled, turning on his side.
Agoti’s dream was shrouded in black, himself being the only thing visible in his nightmare. But there were voices, impish voices taunting him . The child couldn’t even begin to think how the tormentors he met only a day ago got into his head. But that wasn’t very important as they belittled the digidevil, mocking him even more when he began to cry. No matter how frantically he searched for the source of the voices, they couldn't be found.
“Leave me alone!” He cried one final time.
Tears were beginning to leak from his eyes, his whimpers soft and anguished. Agoti fell to his knees and curled up into a ball. “Daddy...Aldie…help me.”
But nobody came. That was soon to change, Agoti was jolted out of his nightmare by the loud clap of lightning. He wrenched up from his bed with an audible gasp. The moment he opened his eyes, he felt afraid. The fear bubbling in his chest built up into a scream he shrieked into the night, his high-pitched and terrified wail muffled by the natural boom of thunder.
His eyes were wide with alarm and what would normally be rivers of salty water spilling from his eyes were strips of VHS film. He was in shock, sitting erect and still from the raw terror circulating his body. The images of his nightmare cycled through his mind and the violent thunderstorm distressing him more as the seconds ticked by drove his quivering lip to release the cries building up the painful lump in his throat.
The toddler’s weeps were loaded with whimpers and snotty hiccups. He tried so desperately to palm away the tears streaming down his face, but alas, they did not relent. His hazy vision stared into the darkness of his bedroom, flinching every time lightning struck and momentarily showed the stark white interior of the room before reverting back to black.
The glowing stars plastered on the ceiling above his bed brought him no level of comfort. Agoti's gaze flickered next to him to his tear-stained stuffed bear. Without hesitation, he grabbed the animal and sought protection under the covers. His face was buried into its soft fur while fresh, hot tears ran free. His sobbing was uncontrollable, squeaking when lightning roared outside as he could never brace himself in time.
Like many young children, Agoti would have trouble sleeping in the dark. His beloved father had noticed his struggles and gifted the boy a nightlight to help soothe him during the night. But right now he couldn’t handle it alone.
The digidevil waited for another minute, anxiously anticipating the sound of the door opening and being met by the gentle glow of his father. Or if he was lucky, his older sister would come through and snuggle under the sheets with him. Both options sounded lovely, so he waited. It soon became apparent after a few minutes none of that was happening. It was only a muffled rainstorm and teddy bear as his friends during this dire time. Terrified to death, he lifted his head out from under his sheets, his hot cheeks streaking with tears.
He wouldn’t get anywhere by calling for them again, the outside cacophony made that feat impossible. The 4-year-old, with shaky hands, slipped off his bed and plopped down on the carpet, leaving his animal friend behind.
Even at his young age, Agoti was unusually small, he couldn’t reach most things that children his age could. Most of what he couldn’t reach was doorknobs, so his father was committed to leaving the door ajar for him to leave at night less a situation similar to his current or if a late-night bathroom break was needed.
He stuck his hand in between the gap and slowly opened the wooden door, grimacing as it moaned along its hinges. Agoti peeked out slowly, feeling an overwhelming sense of dread that made his blood run once in contact with the darkness outside his room.
With this new revelation, Agoti knew he wouldn’t be able to enter the corridor without any… ‘reinforcements’.
The stars above his bed replaced the general use of his nightlight by a long shot and he didn’t have to use it much anymore. But he did keep it and remembered leaving it in his drawer. He turned his attention back inside to the piece of furniture on the other side of the room. The demon walked up to it and sorted through the top section of random junk, eventually hitting something firm and around.
He grabbed it and felt along its side to flick it to life, holding it with both hands. Agoti had to squint when its warm light hit his eyes but adjusted well enough to make out its features. Silk silicon layered the rotund exterior and two ears poked out the top to give it the authentic look of a rabbit.
He left the comfortable quarters of his bedroom after assuring himself his father was just down the hall. Unfortunately for him, he had unluckily directly stepped on a weak floorboard. The sharp squeal made the digidevil jump a foot into the air, snapping his head down so quickly it made him dizzy. Realizing it was just the floor made him sigh out in relief, not doing much to quell the anxieties that prickled at the nape of his neck.
Agoti began to trek down the hallway, it felt much longer than what he experienced during the day. His senses were running on overdrive, acutely aware of every sound surrounding him. Each breath that entered and exited his lungs, the rapid clattering of rain on their roof, the creaking sounds along the floor where he walked, all served to make the experience as sinister as possible.
Then he heard it.
A creak not from his own doing, coming from just behind him.
Agoti whipped around, holding the nightlight right in front of him. He hesitated but ultimately approached the weak floorboard where the noise had resonated.
There was nothing there.
His vision was superior to most species compared to his, but even he struggled to see what was in front of him. Agoti focused and scrutinized the darkest depth of the hallway, seeming to stretch infinitely from where he was standing.
He looked a little harder and that’s when he dropped the only thing that could protect him. He swore he saw a figure move in the dark.
Agoti grabbed it from the ground and quickened his pace, his little feet pattering across the ground. It was enough to finally make it, his hand trembling as he knocked and didn’t dare to move the light hovering over the patch of darkness. The wait was agonizing and the more he glanced back, the more threatened he felt, like a looming presence was steadily approaching him each time he briefly looked away.
Agoti knocked harder, beating his small fist into the wooden door, crying out for his father. The demon could only hope the man would come sooner. After all, who knows what was really in this hallway?
…
The chamber’s only nuance within the stygian and static environment was a bizarre blue figure sitting quietly, holy light shedding from their body. The man with every rapid and accurate keystroke of his fingertips connecting with the keyboard occasionally stopped to sip his coffee. The black kind was his favorite, it being his number-one assistant in getting through the hazy nights made of nothing but raw work ethic. But if he was feeling generous, he would add some cream or sugar to it.
The man lived this lifestyle for numerous decades and it still caused him to call into question how he got here. Sure, he could recall the precise events that landed him as an Earth dweller. But they felt so surreal, it was such an abrupt shift from who he was then.
That didn’t stop him from adapting, however.
Whilst taking out another paper to file and beginning to write on it, he stopped mid-stroke of his cursive handwriting. Solazar began to think, his thoughts were interfered by a flood of memories. It was practically routine at this point for him to take time out of every day to reflect.
Solazar descended from an ancient race named the Solarisapiens, densely populated with murderous, god-like star entities. They were the next of kin from the gods themselves and what they would do struck terror throughout the universes. And after eons of bloodshed, one of them suddenly becomes a father of two. If it had been during war, his high social standing as a commander created to lead these bloody crusades would sink to the furthest level. Solazar would be looked down upon and ridiculed, distinguished with a flaw that hadn’t been noticed by their oversight; it wasn’t in their programming to care about mortals. The brutal punishment afterward was something he had only personally witnessed, but it left an impression on his fellow warriors if they dared to be so incompetent in their purpose. He did train them to be merciless and obedient, but to be reduced to such putty was a fault he held against himself. Their fate was sealed the moment their betrayal came to light. It didn’t happen often but when it did, certain procedures would be initiated.
The ceremony that took place was meant to purge the warrior of the humanity they gained, to give them a second chance. But at a cost.
The Solarisapien would have their limbs dismembered and every single one of them was catapulted out into the deepest, most treacherous parts of the universe. They may only return after regaining the members of their body, to prove their loyalty to their purpose. Those days were cruel but over, the war was ended, and while the blood on his hands had washed away, he reminds himself often they haven’t faded. Not yet at least.
Solazar was aware of the risks of fathering mortals. He had grown fond of them and their antics, he had grown to even love them. This was despite his specific design created for being an unfeeling monster, Earth somehow changed him in such a way he had the ability to love. Solazar accepted their fates a long time ago; everything would die eventually, he just wouldn’t be a part of it. For each day the sun still shines, he would cherish the chaos and laughter his children have brought into his life.
Solazar despised self-pity, but even he had to admit his own fate was the worst out of any painful way to die. He is forced to walk along this mortal plane, created to fight for all eternity, and no longer supported the reason for it, so what were his goals now? The death of his children would strip him of his purpose as a father, foraging a path down an existential crisis-
What was he doing?
There were better things to worry about.
He blinked once, snapping him out of his trance, and realized the tip of his pen left stiff by his hand accumulated a glob of ink on his sheet, leaving a noticeable stain on his pristine handwriting. Solazar rubbed his eyes, sighing deeply. He blinked again, now putting down the pen to massage his face with both of his hands.
‘Goodness that stings,’ He thought to himself.
Needle-like sensations have been shanking into his eyes for the past several hours. Staring so hard at his screen because he was so adamant about his work wasn’t healthy. Yet again, he disregarded his doctor’s warning, it was no wonder why he was farsighted. Short spurts of shut eyes did the job of replenishing his drive, so the fiery being leaned back in his chair to take a deep breath and closed his eyes.
Infinite energy meant the man didn’t sleep, so ever since he crashed onto Earth, he would spend his time running errands. Even though the specimen was quite intelligent, it landed him a not so revered job as a music manager. The man admired music, how humans were able to craft a piece made with skill and passion was a beautiful thing to him. Unfortunately, many of the clients he had to work with have proven themselves as either incompetent in their jobs or bailouts. With his constant failures, it made creating a profit difficult so he would often live paycheck to paycheck. It was just enough for his children and their home so he didn’t dwell into it.
Solazar pushed himself back to give the desk and himself some space in between them. He folded his hands together and placed the interlocked hands on his lap after crossing his leg over the other. He closed his eyes and started to softly hum, mindlessly humming to no one in the room other than himself. It helped him relax.
That’s when the former warrior was interrupted by thumping on his door.
“Hm?” He pondered aloud, looking behind him to lock eyes with the wooden door. He knew exactly who it was based on the squeamish pleads on the other side. Solazar, with steady haste, got up on his two feet and opened the door. His gaze instantly dropped to the ground to see Agoti, his youngest, at his heels. Before he could react, the small child dropped what he was holding and hugged his leg, crying.
The incomprehensible blubber sputtering through his lips caused the man’s hardened gaze to soften. Agoti looked up at him with big, glossy eyes, stretching out his little arms and grabbing at the air, beckoning the man to hold him.
“Did the storm wake you?” He spoke in a low voice and kneeled down in front of him, opening his arms to give him access to his embrace. The demon was quick to fall into his arms, bawling so hard he could hardly say a word.
He nodded quickly, “M-mhm.” the toddler whined, clutching onto his torso. “I had a... *sniff* a really bad dream.”
“So you had a nightmare?”
“Uh- *hic* huh. I was scared, Daddy. No one was there…”
His father’s eyes slit into a sympathetic gaze and pulled the demon closer into his arms, “Shhshh, it’s okay. I’m here for you.” he hushed, slowly rubbing his back.
The warmth he had ached for crowned his body in a soothing heat and his nerves strayed once his flesh made contact, reminding him of the familiar buzz that came with his father’s touch. Solazar stayed there for a while, patting the back of his head while continuing to calm him down.
The child’s shivering slowed down to a halt when his body melted from the affection. He glanced at the glowy object on the ground and picked it up with one hand, holding Agoti in his other arm.
“Ah, you used the nightlight I gave you.” He mused, inspecting the tool in his hand.
He nodded, still sniffling.
“That’s alright, I gave it to you for a reason. Do you like it?”
Agoti seemed to hesitate before nodding his head again.
He peered at him, consumed in thought before speaking up. “Maybe it could be brighter next time?”
“Mhm.” He heard Agoti mumble into his chest.
“Then I’ll look for a special one, just for you.” The Solarisapien gave him a tight side hug, which had Agoti’s face squished up against his.
The warmth he had ached for crowned his body in a soothing heat and his nerves strayed once his flesh made contact, reminding him of the familiar buzz that came with his father’s touch. Solazar stayed there for a while, patting the back of his head while continuing to calm him down.
Solazar flicked it off and left the nightlight where it was, and stood up, holding the toddler as he walked back inside his room. He closed the door behind him and sat down on his unused bed and placed the digidemon on his lap. The room had been nearly pitch black at this point, minus his blue flames and still-illuminated laptop at his desk. He reached his hand toward the nightstand to pull the string hung under the hood of the lamp and gave it a tug, now able to properly see him.
“So tell me about this nightmare of yours.” He questioned calmly, looking thoughtfully at his adopted son.
“It was the b-boys from the playground.” Agoti mewled, “T-they were h-hurting me and-” he began to cry again, recalling the terrifying dream. “They said they would hurt me if I told anyone!” The Solarisapien quietly listened to his dilemma, stroking the top of his head to calm him.
“It was only a dream, okay? Anyone who tries to intimidate our family will have to go through me first,” He said assuringly, however, Agoti didn’t take much of a liking to this.
“They sounded like monsters and were really scary! D-don’t you remember yesterday?”
Solazar did in fact remember yesterday, it was an especially terrible day for Agoti. He managed to get cornered by two older children while at the playground with his sister. They went as far as to get physical and destroyed his favorite toy in front of him. This was the first time anything like this had ever happened to him, so it gave him quite the scare. Luckily Aldryx eventually found him and terrorized them both into submission and managed to escape before any on-sight parents got involved.
Solazar admits the outcome would have been much better if he was present, his poor son came home sobbing and he had to promise to get him another toy to stop the tears. But as expected, the parents of the bullies would come to his door, complaining about their ‘innocent’ children coming home mysteriously bruised. Solazar wasn’t having any of it and proceeded to verbally rip them to shreds, insulting every part of their subpar parenting, and with a wave of his hand, dismissed them off his property.
He tried to sympathize. "I remember, Agoti, and I know it was scary, but-”
“NO YOU- *hic* don’t!” Agoti started to fuss, his cries intertwined with a hiccuping fit. He mewled after his outcry, putting his face in his hands as Solazar rubbed his back.
“I do know, Agoti.” Solazar uttered, gingerly thumbing a tear off his face, “Try to calm down, okay? Breathe for me.” he said it in the softest tone he could muster, but it barely helped.
“I tried to find you but I couldn’t!” Agoti sobbed.
As if the situation couldn’t escalate anymore, the 4-year-old began to hyperventilate. Solazar could feel his VHS heart pounding against his ribs repeatedly. At this rate, the digidemon would have a panic attack.
“They said they would- they said they would- *hic* hurt me! And you weren’t there! *sniff* I-I thought you had forgotten about me.”
This struck a chord within him. “Agoti, I would never…”
“They said they would take big sis a-away from *hic* m-mehe.” He buried his face into his chest and lamented his sorrows. “I-I don��t want y-you and A-Aldie to go!”
His father only had to think for a second to know what to do next. Agoti’s distress after a nightmare wasn’t uncommon, but this time was especially bad. Anything he said to try and soothe him was a trigger word to his panic, he would have to approach this would a lot more grace. Solazar held onto his son’s shoulders to push him back, exposing his tear-stained face to him. His fingers brushed against his cheek and with his hand, he softly caressed the smooth skin. His index finger moved beneath his chin to angle up and have their gazes link, held together by his thumb. Solazar’s pure white scleras gently stared into his wide, terrified ones.
“Breathe, Agoti. I’m not going anywhere.” There was a ring in his voice that grabbed the attention of his son, gentle but firm in his words.
The digidevil ogled obliviously at Solazar, his words quite not processing.
“Follow my lead.” he demonstrated, his chest rising and falling as breathed deeply. Agoti stared at him for a while before attempting to mimic his actions. It took some effort through all the tears but not long after, his breathing evened out and he found himself synchronizing with his father. At this very moment, the pair silently bonded as his nerves were tamed and put to rest.
The room was quiet, save for the soft breathing and gentle praises from Solazar to keep going. His method of calming the child was successful, he wasn’t crying anymore and the film was hanging loosely from his eyes. The Solarisapien plucked off a strip and peered into the black squares, seeing from his perspective the void that his child was plunged into. He tore the rest away, grazing his hand over his face and creating a small pile of film onto the carpet below them both.
Solazar wrapped his arms around him in a loving embrace and said to him. "Listen to me when I say this, Agoti, I will always be with you. There’s no way I could leave someone as sweet as you behind.”
“Really?” He sniffled, a flicker of hope flashing behind his eyes.
Solazar raised a brow at the rhetorical question. “Do I really need to answer that?”
Agoti’s soft giggle hung in the air as he was lifted into the air under his arms, spreading a smile onto the Solarisapien’s face, his eyes curving to show the affection brewing behind his glasses. “Hehe, I don’t think so?” He giggled. He was placed on his lap again, to which the digidevil snuggled into his chest, listening closely to his father.
“You don’t ever have to be afraid of me leaving you. I would never do that to you, my child.”
“You promise?” The demon whispered, peering up at him with even more hopeful eyes.
The Solarisapien’s shoulders shook as he chuckled deeply and lovingly at the silly question. “Yes, Agoti, I promise.”
He held up his pinky, eyes glistening. “Pinky promise?”
Solazar held up his own. “I promise.”
There was a moment of silence between the pair.
“I love you, Daddy.”
He pressed his cheek against his forehead affectionately. “And I love you.”
Solazar readjusted the boy, laying him into the crook of his arm, and began to gently rock him. Agoti laid still, relaxing his muscles, and ascended to a sort of heaven with the coziness the heat gave. Solazar placed his hand on top of his head again and massaged each one of his tendrils, taking his time with each one to let his son know just how much he cared about him. To send this point home, his deep voice coaxed him closer to the cliff of slumber as he once again mindlessly hummed a berceuse.
The past warrior was massive and radiated warmth, so Agoti took it upon himself to take advantage of it and used him as a heat blanket. Agoti felt more than safe, he felt loved by the man that was carrying him oh so gently. Little did he know, Solazar was already aware of his neat little trick.
He would ‘coincidently’ pass out in places he knew his father would come across, the most ludicrous spot he discovered him in was the bathroom sink. It was all a ploy for Solazar to attempt to wake him up, fail, and eventually tuck him into bed himself. His father knew from the start what he was doing, he could even feel his chest quiver with suppressed giggles, proud that his plan had worked out so many times. Sometimes he would even peek an eye open to see if Sol was giving him the attention he desired. It amused him but he couldn’t find it within himself to point out the adorable quirk.
He stood up. “Let’s get you to bed now, alright?”
Agoti went stiff and paused, shocked that they had to depart so suddenly, “Can we please stay here?” he begged.
Solazar shook his head. “No, Agoti. You need to sleep in your own bed.”
“Pleeease? I don’t want you to go…” He whined, clinging onto his shirt tighter.
“No means no, Agoti.” He understood the child’s fear but also understood the child would have to get used to the dark eventually.
The digidevil’s expression turned sour and he puffed out his cheeks. Agoti’s calm breathing began to waver and his whines were quickly escalating.
Solazar sighed. “Don’t make that face, Agoti…”
Agoti pouted even more, his expression souring by the second.
“No!” He cried.
“What-”
“I’m not leaving you!”
The toddler grabbed handfuls of his turtleneck sweater and clung to the black fabric. Solazar was sure he was gripping hard enough to where he didn’t even have to hold him if he stood up. He quickly sat down again and hugged the digidevil just in time for him to let out a loud wail onto his chest. Sobbing ensued.
‘Goodness…’ he thought to himself.
Agoti was a stubborn child, once he believed something, it took a lot of convincing to reverse the effects it had. He was grieving at the thought of his father abandoning him. He would never of course, but his son’s recent nightmare clouded his innocence with pessimism. The only logical solution would be to inflict the opposite. Make him feel good about himself, cheerful even, but with what? A warm glass of milk? Retelling his favorite stories?
Solazar’s brainstorming landed him in the middle of yesterday where this whole incident started. Of course, Agoti was still very upset but then it jumped to later in the day with his sudden change of mood, he was acting like himself and graced anyone he was with a beaming smile. He found this very strange as not too long ago, the boy was distraught and now he was back to normal. What caused such sudden optimism finally jogged his memory into remembering why…
Oh no.
In practice, it could be very effective against Agoti considering his sensitivity to touch that came with his age. It wouldn’t be very hard to dish it out. If you were to ask Solazar about performing the action, however, he would call you ridiculous.
This activity that Solazar was so unsure about was tickling.
Aldryx, his older sister, had gotten tired of Agoti’s constant moping. He would drone on about how upset he was until she couldn’t take it anymore. Aldryx chased him down, and the duo scampered all around the house loudly enough to simulate an earthquake. None of Solazar’s warnings to tone it down stopped them. Once Agoti was cornered, instead of their usual roughhousing, she ruthlessly tickled him until he agreed to stop talking about it. The Solarisapien very vividly remembers the laughter and squealing that came from behind his door.
It persisted until the deal was made official, albeit breathlessly on Agoti’s part. After that, the younger demon continued his daily hijinks like nothing had ever happened.
That was until tonight, he was still haunted by the day before. Solazar wanted to feel frustrated, all of their best efforts have led to naught and even his sister couldn’t stop it from persisting. He stopped himself once he realized what he was thinking and stopped himself in the middle of his foolish thoughts. Was he really going to insinuate a 4-year-old was at fault here? He had no one else to go to other than his family, they lived in a world where anyone could be taken advantage of, a foreign concept to Solazar. However, Agoti had just experienced this firsthand a day before. He could only imagine what it was like and felt a sudden tide of compassion for the small boy.
He wasn’t well adjusted to give physical affection despite the years they had been under his custody. Sure he would hug them and overall, tried to be the father they needed. Tickling was even rarer. Majority of the time it was unintentional and he would be left confused why his daughter or son was giggling up a storm when touching them in certain places. Sometimes it was purposeful but was brief and lasted only a few seconds as a response to his little one’s mischief with a small bit of his own. Solazar either way was apprehensive at the idea, making Agoti uncomfortable was the last thing he wanted. He heard his muffled mewl, aching with sadness and wrought with pain. Finally, the man spoke up, he couldn’t bear to see his son so distraught any longer.
His arms were already wrapped around his body which could prevent him from squirming away. Solazar didn’t have much experience with the activity but knew along the torso solicited the biggest response. He mindlessly scribbled up his side, his massive hand could reach the entire area so no part was left untouched. The reaction was immediate, Agoti gasped at the sudden touch, which didn’t stop the fit of soft but bright giggles bubbling out of him. He did it again with his other hand, causing the boy to attempt to squirm away from his hand. The next spot he didn’t expect to be targeted was his back, he traced along the center of his spine slowly. Agoti arched his back with a light squeal, finally showing his face to his loving father as he expelled a flurry of happy giggles, shivering at his gentle touch, and looked up at him, confused but smiling.
“Pahapapa, what ahare you- eheehee!” The digidevil’s query was interrupted by another wave of bubbling laughter, this time much louder. The Solarisapien was stroking up and down his back with his entire hand, each digit crawling up and down his spine like a spider. It was sending fuzzy, warm feelings in his chest, so he didn’t hold back his laughter.
“Just relax, Agoti. Let me take care of you.” He sounded suave and mellow, not helping the fact he was being held against his will. Solazar picked up the boy and laid him down on his lap, keeping his body facing up.
Agoti wiggled on his thighs, tittering with anticipation and a giddiness he hadn’t quite felt before. “Dahahahaddy! Eeeheeheehee!” The boy was giggling like he was still being tickled, which confused the Solarisapien for a moment as he hadn’t touched him yet. It made him slightly chuckle in response once he realized why he was giggling so much.
“I’m guessing it's my hands doing this to you?” His children weren’t lying when they said his flames made their skin feel funny.
“That tihihickles!” Agoti cried.
Solazar patted the top of his head. “Don’t worry, I’ll be more gentle this time.”
He resumed his tickling, mostly letting his flames do the work, and only slightly grazed his fingertips over the torso, mostly targeting his back and sides like before. This left Agoti in a never-ending snorting mess as the warmth sent shocks of ticklish sensations up his body. The digidevil was squirming from left to right, never leaving the safe spot his father had placed him. Although he secretly enjoyed it, the instinct to protect himself by wrapping his arms around his body never faltered.
“Mweheeheehee *snort* ahahahahaah!” By then, the child was face down, still giggling up a storm. Warm fingers were tracing random shapes up and down his spine, eliciting the biggest response out of the boy. Solazar’s stern expression softened, gazing at his son with admiration and delight. Making his way to his lower back, he teased the skin where the shirt rode up from all the movement. Agoti wheezed and his laughter turned silent before he returned to his hysterical fit, sounding even more childish with a hint of femininity now that his voice was so high-pitched.
The Solarisapien’s eyes thinned, the bridge of his nose wrinkling as the invisible smile returned to spread across his face. The spot seemed too much for him as much of his laughter was starting to sound too breathy, so he slowed down. He calmed down, giggles still sputtering out of him and laced with unintelligible babbles for mercy. Using the other, he began to tap the side of his ribcage, the fabric of his shirt moving as he gently dug into the bones. With the size of his hand, five fingers were able to press into his entire side of bony flesh while the other hand titillated off his back. All ten of his fingers were doing their job of keeping the boy in stitches, belly laughing with his whole heart, Solazar could feel his stomach rumble and shake with unfiltered mirth.
“AhaHahAhah mweheHEHhehe- *snort* p-pahAhaHapa!” The demon howled, slightly kicking his legs. From where Solazar was, he could see the corner of the child’s wide smile.
“Do you need a break?” He asked.
“I doohoohoo! I dohoho!” The digidevil cried.
Solazar stopped and removed his hands, giving the boy time to recover from the tickling. He wasn’t outright gasping for air, but he definitely struggled to keep it stable. Agoti flipped onto his back to rub his eyes, removing the stripes of mirth that threatened to fall out. His smile was gleeful and his cheeks were a lovely crimson tint. The aftermath was pleasant, the tingling was not only present on his torso but throughout his entire body, reaching the tip of his tendrils to the top of his toes. It left him feeling purely euphoric.
“Hehe…ehehe…” He tittered, his energy was being depleted at a moment’s notice.
“Are you alright?” The digidevil looked at him with sleepy eyes and nodded slowly. His demeanor was exhausted and tired, but his tail was curling happily at the treatment he had received. Agoti moaned softly, worming his way into his chest.
The Solarisapien, without skipping a beat, carefully scooped him up and held him close. This night was.. longer than he expected, normally Solazar would already have the toddler in bed by now. But he thinks this night was needed, for the both of them to be together. He made sure to make the transition to the corridor as smooth as possible, swiftly getting up and closing the bedroom behind him in one fluid motion. With half-lidded eyes, Agoti’s blurry vision made it hard to see, but what was quickly made apparent to him now that they were in the hallway. His father shined brighter than ever, standing out from anything else in the corridor. Solazar began his stride deeper in, his glow bouncing off the walls.
Time slowed down as the pair traveled across the rooms, they were in no rush so Solazar took his time. They had made it and his father pushed the door open where it was left agape. Solazar stepped inside and began to slide his fingertips over the wall, guiding his hand to locate the light switch. Upon contact, he flicked it to life.
Solazar grimaced and squinted hard as he rubbed the burning that returned in his eyes. It didn’t help, he really needed to take a break after this. Once his vision came into view, it made his environment finally observable.
Unsurprisingly, the room looked as it had always been, but disturbed from what he could tell from the disheveled bed sheets. The walls were painted in pastel red and blue stripes, decorated with stickers of spaceships and stars, along with the mild scribbles that Agoti had drawn all over. There was even a box of toys in the corner of the room well over the max as other ones were scattered about the carpet. The shelves were occupied with books all about his favorite things, with one dedicated solely to his stuffed animal collection. Then there was the lone rocking chair placed in the corner of the room next to the window, masked by the dusty ruby-red curtain. Solazar didn’t really need to use it since his son’s infancy but left it there for old time's sake.
He made his way to the small bed and laid the demon on the mattress. He then pinched the corner of the comforter and draped the fluffy material over his body.
Solazar deeply stared at him with a certain gaze that would only belong to a father deeply fond of his children and stood up to leave.
He looked back at him. “Sweet dreams, Agoti. Rest well.”
As his hand lifted off the mattress to make his departure, a gentle tug pulled on his sleeve.
“Um, Daddy?” He heard the meek voice of Agoti say.
Just his luck.
“Yes? What is it?” Solazar sighed, kneeling back down.
Agoti tugged at his sleeve more, gesturing Solazar to lean over so he could say something in his ear.
“Can you sing me a lullaby?” He whispered.
Solazar thought for a moment and pulled down his sleeve to look at his watch. 1:48 AM. It was already extremely late and that could lead to some trouble falling back to sleep. Thinking about it more, a lullaby made a lot more sense; it could serve as a sort of encore to their already chaotic night.
“Sure.” He says.
His skills with the piano gave him a lot of time to practice his own singing too. All too often he was interrupted and teased by his children for it. Nowadays, both of them loved to serenade in music and often joined their father.
Agoti’s eyes lit up with joy, “Yay, papa’s singing!” he rhapsodized. His previous exhaustion seemed to vanish out of thin air and was replaced with his typical energetic self. Children were…odd. One moment they could be at the edge of passing out and the next they are seen bouncing off the wall, it was funny honestly.
The Solarisapien pulled the demon out under the covers, the comforter slothing off his body in the process. Solazar held him as got up and sat down on the rocking chair. He pushed aside the curtains and spread the blinds between his fingers to peek and looked up towards the sky. He hadn’t realized the thunderstorm had passed up until now, although many thick clouds had been left behind.
“Do you hear that?” Solazar said, still looking out the window.
“Hear what?”
“The rain, do you hear it?”
Come to think of it, he didn’t hear it anymore. He hadn’t realized when it stopped.
Solazar turned his body towards his window and pulled the string attached allowing them both to see the outside completely. The numerous clouds didn’t flood the sky anymore, occasionally dripping and enriching the dark sky like a great big canvas, acting as an impromptu portière to the doorway of the waning crescent that stood on the other side. Once exposed, it filled the sky with its eternal glory.
He pulled down his glasses to get a better view. Their view of the moon didn’t waver, Solazar was especially fixated on its beauty.
This gave him an idea.
He turned to his son, fixing the prescriptions back onto his eyes. “Agoti, I want to show you something. Something extraordinary…”
The cryptic tone caught his attention.
“Like what, papa?”
Solazar leaned in. “Something enchanting I know you will like.”
There was a solid three seconds of silence before Agoti stammered out excitedly. “I-is it magic?!”
Influenced by fantasy and the like, he would answer with that. “You could say that.”
His already bright and cheery smile widened and the anticipation warping his excited nerves morphed into butterflies flapping within the bowels of his gut.
His train of thought was interrupted when something bright brimmed in his peripheral vision. He looked directly at whatever it was but immediately had to look away as it was shining so brilliantly. Agoti had to squint to make out what it was, eventually making out the shape of his father's hand, now a glowing glob of light. Solazar snapped his fingers, triggering the glow to dispel, echoing around them with such bass, it startled him.
The digidevil’s eyes were wide with alarm and he hadn’t realized he was holding in his breath, itching for something to happen. Just as he was beginning to breathe, a sound resonated that he didn’t quite expect; a twinkle. The twinkling gradually grew, crystalline diamonds manifesting and briefly ascending above them before disappearing.
His time to process what was happening was cut short after a beacon of pure light engulfed them. When Agoti opened his eyes, their surroundings were now consumed in white, the only exception being the more pasteled variant of his father. Agoti looked down at his own body to realize he looked the same and this new environment had completely changed his natural color pallet.
A breeze formed under them and seemed to push them upwards as the more the winds increased. Agoti was about to ask Solazar what was going on when he noticed himself beginning to float. It was slow and hardly noticeable but when he did, he saw the way his clothes would air around his body, similar to a blanket in the ripples of gentle wind. Or how his short tendrils became independent of just resting on his scalp.
The digidevil was hardly off his lap but after some movement, he discovered he could move around the white space like a pool of water. He had fun experimenting with this new gravity, spinning, and doing all sorts of tricks as if he were a simple lost boy, ageless but youthful. Agoti, upside down, grasped his father’s face and joyfully greeted him, “Hi daddy!” his tail curling behind him with elation.
Solazar played along, allowing him to grab onto his glasses, “Hello, my child. How are you doing tonight?” he responded warmly. While still upside down, Agoti sloppily put them on, amusing the star being into a chuckle.
“You look silly without your glasses,” He simpered.
Agoti giggled when his nose was softly booped by his finger. “I beg to differ, little one.”
There was a noticeable pickup in speed, throwing off the demon since he was already adjusted to the new atmosphere. He found it harder to move in the empty space, stuck in his now upside-down position. Solazar did the honors for him and grabbed his shoulders to pull him back to his original position.
“That will happen the closer we get to our destination, just be sure to hold on.” Solazar said after he reclaimed his glasses. The demon pressed his face against his chest with a grip on his shirt and shut his eyes. Another shockwave pulsed through them as the new wave of speed was brought upon them, moving so quickly, it felt like they were traveling at light speed. Agoti whimpered, the feeling of his shirt whipping against his body made him realize just how quickly they were traveling. He fluttered his eyes open, fearful at first but dazzled by the way Solazar’s flames burned. It possessed a fierceness that would crumble his foes to their knees, he felt inspired by it. Like a candle in a snowstorm, it was on the cusp of burning out but its tiny blaze was determined to keep the night shining.
Then it all stopped.
His ears were no longer overburdened with fast winds and chimes akin to a chandelier being spun ceased to exist. The demon didn’t dare to open his eyes, afraid of what he might see. But of course, Solazar was there to mediate his fears.
"It’s ok, you can open your eyes now.”
The way his voice sounded surprised the toddler. His soft inside voice was replaced with a resounding chime as if they had traveled inside a cave.
"I-I don’t wanna look!” He whined.
“You will be fine. It isn’t anything that will scare you.” Solazar spoke with an assuring, confident voice.
Agoti, hesitant at first, obeyed his father and barely jarred his eyes open. But through the thin window of his vision realized there was no imminent threat, which finally gave him the courage to open them both completely.
He gasped loudly and a wide grin slowly crept up his lips…
“It’s- it’s space!” He gushed, his voice booming with astonishment, “How can we breathe? Aldie said there’s no air!” shouted Agoti, unable to contain his excitement.
Solazar lightly shrugged his shoulders. "You could say I brought a bit of home here with us.” Agoti didn’t question it and was still in awe, again not realizing he had been holding his breath this whole time.
He bounced with excitement. “I’m gonna tell everyone about this!” His enthusiasm for space was really touching and Solazar was honestly very flattered by this.
“Do tell, I’m sure your sister would be delighted, but on another note,” He cleared his throat. "You might be confused about why you’re here right now, yes? ”
“A little,” he responded.
“This place is peaceful and full of wonder, somewhere I visited where I needed to clear my head. When you would have trouble sleeping at night, I would bring us here to sing to you,” He was speaking faintly but fondly as he remembered the sweet yet chaotic times when the demon was just an infant.
Agoti was quiet for a moment. “I don’t remember that?”
“You were so young, nobody would.”
He pondered and glanced down at himself to see if he still possessed his pastel palette. It was gone, replaced by a shimmery aura that bounced off both his and his father’s bodies. Continuing to look around, everything he took in was so unfamiliar. Just somewhere in the cosmos, he guessed. None of the planets were from their own solar system and neither were they in one, but the planets dispersed about were close enough for them to personally observe. Around them were a multitude of worlds ranging in all colors and sizes.
Even the suns nearby looked remotely nothing like theirs. That wasn’t the only thing there, stars were obvious but from afar did Agoti see these sort of cloud-like accumulations of colorful speckles. Nebulas of course! He remembered that from the books he read with his sister and would definitely have a story to tell once morning arrived.
He looked to see his father gazing up at the space, eyes glinting with fascination.
“Isn’t it beautiful?”
Agoti’s quick babble was all he needed to know he agreed with him.
“What’s that star over there?” Agoti questioned, pointing to one particular star. It wasn’t like the other ones where they glowed a color that would be anomalous to their solar system. It was anomalous to every sun around it, aqua blue and yellow swirled within its core like a cauldron having its contents stirred, its surface shining a seafoam green. Despite the bizarre coloring, it fascinated Agoti and he was instantly entranced by its alluring appearance.
“I’m not sure. Do you like it?” He asked.
“Yeah! Can we name it?” The boy was enthused, standing up to get a better view.
Solazar kept him steady by planting his hands on his hips, for a few moments, he thought of a name for this unknown star. “Maybe Cerulean would be a good name? It goes well with the blue.”
“It’s perfect!”
There was always something new to see no matter where he looked. His adoptive father could indeed relate to this feeling.
Agoti for the next several minutes pointed out every detail and squealed over each new discovery to his father. He let him rant about it, he would get tired eventually. And as if on cue, a wave of exhaustion crashed over him. The digidevil felt his eyelids get a little heavy and his body’s muscles began to go limp at an unprecedented rate. He plopped back down before leaning back into his body.
“Dad I’m…tired,” He said in between a loud yawn.
Solazar pressed a finger to his intangible lips. “Shhh~ You’ve been awake long enough, close your eyes.”
Agoti’s eyelids succumbed to its weight, quicking shutting close.
“That’s it, just listen to my voice… ”
He lightly brushed his knuckles against his hair. He knew just the song to sing and looked forward to finally bringing his boy peace, just as he did all those years ago. Solazar's deep voice became smooth as he commenced his serenade, sounding much more divine as his cords echoed despite the heavens they were in being devoid of oxygen.
…
♪ Come little children
♬ I’ll take thee away
♩ Into a land of enchantment
♩ Come little children
♪ The time’s come to play
The digidevil was immediately dragged into a state of calm, helped by the Solarisapien who sang so handsomely. His carol fills the quiet around them.
Follow sweet children ♩
I’ll show thee the way♩
Through all the pain ♫
And the sorrows ♪
Weep not poor children ♫
For life is this way ♩
Murdering beauties and passions~ ♪
Agoti began to stir when he saw something bright form behind his eyelids and opened them just a tad. He witnessed their surroundings suddenly filled with glowing figures of the sort.
His vision cleared just enough to recognize that it was musical notes materializing. They danced in the air, reminding Agoti of the copies of sheet music he’d seen his father playing. They were blue like his dad and seemed to serve some sort of purpose with his solo, playing the instrumental to the song for further auxiliary.
“Papa, wass tha’?” He slurred, his speech ruined with spittle and weariness.
“This is one of the many gifts I was given when I came to exist.” Solazar stopped singing to answer his question.
“You yourself will be blessed one day,” he rubbed the back of his head with his hand, “Now then, try to go back to sleep.” his voice was rumbling with how low he was speaking.
♬ Hush now dear children
♩ It must be this way
♩ Too weary of life
♪ And deceptions
♫ Rest now my children
♬ For soon we’ll away
♪ Into the calm and the quiet
A symphony of woos slowly began to reveal themselves and surround them, varying in pitch and length, all were quite feminine voices but there was an underlying manly voice behind their delicate chorus. Agoti could start to see figures of people fading in above and around them. They appeared to be the same species as his father. None of them had their entire body showing, ending around the waist, and faded into faint sparkles as the outline of their bodies connected like constellations. One stood out, the man behind the guttural singing and the biggest out of them all, muscular and imposing yet seemingly at peace. The notes pranced around the duo, moving accordingly in a hypnotic fashion. Solazar wasn’t lying when he said this was highly effective. The honeyed voice dripping with affection singing the sweet song in his ear and enchanted infinity called space took a toll, succeeding in shutting his eyes permanently. He could no longer see the forms of the ancient race or the notes as he had finally fallen asleep.
Come little children…♫
I’ll take thee away…♪
Into a land of enchantment…♩
Come little children… ♬
The time’s come to play…♪
“Here in my garden of shadows ♪”
The ancient species sang one last beautiful chorus, singing with more vigor and more passion at the sight of the mortal child resting in his caretaker’s arms. They were merely souls, however, apparitions of warriors who faded eons ago, forever roaming the cosmos in silence.
The notes faded away, along with the spirits who had long since perished, leaving him alone with his son. Solazar sighed and relaxed his shoulders. He wanted to admire the sight of his beautiful boy one more time, he stood out among all the beauty that surrounded them. But was unfortunately interrupted by their aura beginning to dull. Solazar pulled up his sleeve to quickly look at the time, reading 2:27.
They had overstayed their visit, it was time to go home.
Before the aura could fizzle out, he had already snapped his fingers to send them home. Everything from before happened in reverse order, catapulting them to the ground. Agoti somehow remained asleep, a soft smile gracing his already darling expression. Solazar would love to bask in it but was too busy holding onto dear life, keeping the chair's armrest well clutched and silently praying the seat wouldn’t crash.
Once that beacon of light had collapsed and revealed the carpet floor of his room, Solazar braced. Shockingly, the chair bounced off the floor with ease, launching them both in the air before going down again. The momentum knocked them forward hard and fast, so hard he nearly face-planted into the floor but digging his foot in the ground stopped it. Solazar’s eyes were wide and when he looked down at the small boy; he was somehow in a deep sleep.
Solazar stared at his sleeping face, his gaze fueling the core inside of him to swell. A wet line of saliva was leaking from the corner of his slightly agape mouth and he gingerly wiped away the spittle with his thumb. Words couldn’t describe how he was feeling, he just wanted to preserve the scene.
The ancient being stood up from the rocking chair holding him in one arm, using his other to pull back his comforter and prepare the area for his son. Slowly and gently, he laid the digidevil in the empty spot and covered his body over the sheet. He snuggled into the warmth, stretching before falling still back to his sleep. He grabbed his teddy bear and tucked it in next to him. He witnessed him leisurely pull it closer to him. The Solarisapien stood over him and bowed his head.
He took a seat on the corner of his bed, creaking as his weight pressed down on the bolts holding it together. Solazar reached for his face but was stopped by Agoti’s tendrils, who somehow sensed his presence and curled the short hair around his hand sweetly. How long he sat there he didn’t know, but eventually, he knew it was time for his son to sleep alone.
His hand was already on the doorknob and he swung it open before exiting. Outside his room, Solazar couldn’t have felt more relieved and slid his back down the wall before his bottom met the wooden floor. He leaned his head against the wall and took off his glasses, rubbing them against his turtleneck sweater, getting rid of specks that were a nuisance to his vision.
Then he heard it.
A creak not from his own doing.
He turned to his right and saw a pair of disembodied eyes staring at him from the darkness. The creature stepped forward.
It was Luna, the family cat. She was immediately purring and rubbing up against Solazar’s legs and accepted being scratched behind her ears.
“Hello, Luna.”
Luna meowed and rubbed up against him, her black fur felt soft against his legs.
“Why don’t we go relax?”
She meowed, signaling her approval.
…
With the sun creeping up the horizon, it cast red and yellow clouds in the sky as a new day began. Birds sang their melody of dawn, golden light striking the green trees. Tiny flecks danced around the digidevil’s bedroom while gold luster brightened the room. He did not stir, Agoti had never slept so well in his life, the blanket felt so warm and the pillow was soft enough to melt into. The only thing he could hear was his soft snoring and the chirping of birds. He could stay here forever.
Agoti felt a dip further down his bed, but he didn’t dare open his eyes. It was too perfect to ruin this moment.
“Son, it’s time to get up.” Solazar’s voice was nearly in a whisper. His son was a light sleeper, it didn’t take much to wake him up.
He groaned and rotated his body, encasing himself in more of his soft blanket. “Too shleepy…”
Agoti believed he had won and breathed deeply into the layers, taking in their fresh scent. He was left sorely mistaken however once he felt something move under his comforter and attempt to grab him. His father was trying to pick him up out of his bed and he wouldn’t let that happen.
“Nurrr…” Agoti mewled, burrowing deeper into the sheets, dodging the hands trying to grasp him.
“Are you not going to get up?”
“Nuh-uh.” He pouted, upset his morning slumber had been interrupted.
Solazar was silent for a moment.
“Suit yourself.”
What he did next was something he hadn’t seen coming, catching him off guard greatly as two hands tweaked his sides. Solazar systematically targeted his torso, following his son’s every moment so he could never escape and was always first to prod away at his body. Agoti tried to suppress them at first but the laughter piling in his chest was getting harder to ignore. The barrier broke and he let out a flurry of bubbling giggles, doing his best to squirm away from his father’s wrath.
“Agoti, you know how to stop this.” He heard him say but didn’t relent, he really needed his sleep!
“Nohohoho!” The demon cried, encasing himself under the covers to protect himself, which only left him more vulnerable. Solazar proceeded to tickle up and down his son’s torso at random, never giving him a chance to get used to the sensation before moving again. It had a significant effect on his dear boy, who by now made it obvious with his sputtering laughter and silly little snorts in between. Agoti still persisted but still made no effort to bargain with his father.
Sol could clearly see he had inherited his own stubbornness. But what he didn’t have was patience and his father for all he knew could be here all day if he wanted, gently tormenting his boy until he gave in. But with their limited time, it wasn’t possible and he aimed for the final blow. Searching under the cover a bit and eventually landing on what he was looking for, his digits wiggled wildly all over.
Agoti shrieked and the thrashing increasing under the covers indicated he had found what he was looking for.
“Not my rihihihihibs!” The digidemon cried from under the sheets. With all his thrashing, it finally led up to Agoti wrestling the comforter off of him, finally releasing himself from his hiding place. He pushed at his hands, laughing brightly.
“Are you going to get up?” Sol asked, continuing his ministries as the digidevil giggled for mercy.
“Yehehehes pahahapa!” His laughter became girlish as the tickling continued.
His exterior remained hardened and stern, but on the inside, he struggled to keep up the facade.
“And I won’t have to return to your room and do this again, yes?”
A squeal was ripped out of Agoti’s throat once his lower ribs were targeted, warm fingers glazing over his clothed skin.
“Yehehes dahahaddy! I prohohomise!” He didn’t have to wiggle around much longer as Solazar had ceased his playful punishment.
Agoti hugged himself once his hands pulled away and giggled as the residual ghost tickles slowly sunk into his bone, fading into his skin feeling stimulated and sensitive. From all the laughing he had been doing, he thought he would be exhausted. Strangely enough, all of his fatigue from earlier ceased to exist and he felt rather energized.
The Solarisapien adjusted the glasses on his face. “I’ll start cooking breakfast then. How do pancakes sound?”
Agoti’s face lit up in excitement, pancakes were his favorite. “Yeah!”
“You think you can get dressed on your own?”
“Mhm!” He hummed excitedly, looking forward to the flavor of fluffy, buttery pancakes by his father.
“That’s my boy.” He ruffled his tendrils and left the demon to his devices, giving him the well-needed privacy to get dressed. As he left the door behind him ajar, Agoti got to work and directed his path toward his dressers.
He found the perfect t-shirt and while he struggled to clip on his overalls at first, he succeeded and slipped on a pair of socks before escaping his room through the considerately cracked door. Agoti ran out into the kitchen, finding his beloved family and the delicious wafts of butter circulated the air and satisfying crackles of oil smelling of grease got him excited.
If there was anything better in the mornings, it was the sight of bacon and his father’s famous pancakes. His sister and father had their backs turned to him, all focused on the stove as the former warrior instructed his daughter on making the pancakes. Aldryx seemed frustrated but as usual, their father was patient, guiding his child through the steps until she cheered for joy at her successful pancake. It was only then the pair noticed the youngest’s presence that they turned to warmly greet him.
“Nice to see you joined us this morning, Agoti. You look well.” Solazar hummed, drinking from a mug and wearing a chef’s apron.
Aldryx looked and grinned at her little brother, revealing all her sharp sets of teeth to the toddler. She was sitting on the counter, holding a bowl of batter and wearing her signature pink nightgown and pink slippers, swinging her legs in blissful innocence. Even Aldryx was excited at the sweet breakfast the two were going to have.
The flaming male beckoned the smaller child forward and hoisted him up, only this time to place him on his shoulders. Agoti’s legs were twigs compared to the tree trunk equivalent of his neck and when he wrapped his legs around it, they fit perfectly around the nape, giving the toddler the perfect amount of support.
“Would you like to help us make breakfast?” He asked calmly, slightly turning his head to make eye contact with the boy on him.
“Uh-huh!” Agoti was bouncing up and down as he was brought closer to the stovetop. He was struck with the delicious smells of both foods cooking, even more, potent now that he was closer. Solazar did the same with Agoti as he did with Aldryx, slowly teaching him his ways while lightly scolding him if he ate the raw batter. Time slowed down and the household was filled with laughter and chaos as their hijinks persisted.
All of a sudden, Agoti stopped, still holding the spatula. “Daddy, can we eat now? I’m hungry.”
Solazar nodded his head. “I suppose so, go sit down and I’ll bring your plates out to you.”
“Yay!” Both cried in unison, Aldryx jumped off the counter and scampered off with her little brother, who was already climbing up to his booster seat. Dishes clattered and cabinets opened here and there and soon enough, Solazar was walking toward them with their food. They both said their thanks as their father placed the plates with the appropriate silverware in front of them, the duo donning beaming smiles before digging in. Their father sat down with them, but stayed quiet, silently watching them gulp down their food with half-lidded eyes.
Hardly any time had passed and the two children were already begging for another helping. The Solarisapien obliged, picking up their plates yet again to go into the kitchen where the rest of the food lay warm. Unfortunately, in the Entity household, it was never short of calamity. Aldryx and Agoti were already beginning to goof off at the dinner table, flinging specks of food caught by their placemats at each other back and forth. Both were quietly snickering, doing their best to not attract his attention and ducking under the table as a shield against each other’s attacks.
Solazar came back with their second meal and wasn’t surprised at the scene, their faces were peppered with leftover pancake and grease from their bacon. He stared at them and just smiled, placing the plates back down in front of them.
“Enjoy your breakfast, children.”
Needless to say, it was a great morning.
He wouldn’t trade it for the world.
✿
✿
✿
✿
Fin~
#fnf tickling#lee agoti#ler solazar#tickle fic#my fic#my art#ibispaintx#digital art#friday night funkin#i can't begin to tell you how happy i am esp to the fella reading this#also to sugarratio i just wanna let you know that you gotta take your time#last time i checked you were in college#keep slaying dude entity or not people have their eyes on you#they know you're creating cool things and characters so just keep doing whatever makes you the happiest#doodles#entity mod
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2024 edition of Analysing Ram's fanfic collection! 2022 and 2023 editions are there. A few days late but we're still going strong!
Same disclaimer as before, all the ships I've been into are in there under the readmore and some of them are weird, if you thinks some stuff is freaky (derogatory) you probably don't want to look (especially this year!!). Which is fine, see you another time :)
For those who don't mind freaky stuff, come have fun with me once again as I marry my passion for fandom and simple statistics.
(hopefully this is readable? I had to dezoom a little because I have So Much Fic)
... So this is kind of insane for me.
I got into Daredevil a little after last year's edition, and after a full year and about three intense phases of Being Really Into Daredevil (the TV show, I should say right now. I've been meaning to get into the comics but we're not there yet), you can see that I uh. I liked it! Almost 600 fics, jesus. That's more than any of my other fandoms, and by so far it's not even funny. Clearly it shows when I download every fic I read. To be clear most of that folder is Mattfoggy, self-explanatory and uncontroversial I think.
I also got into Baldur's Gate 3, which is probably my folder with the most gen stuff in it, maybe even including my gen folders. That's because 1) I played the game and romanced someone (I'll give you a guess. I'll give you one fucking guess.) so it felt a little strange reading ship fic for a game when you've played an active role in the story? and 2) because for once there isn't just one ship I'm into. All of these fuckers have so much potential chemistry with everyone else it's kind of wild. You could take any of the main six/eight companions, put them together, and I'd see it! So, genfic, and a fair bit of Bloodpact because I'm extra-compelled by Astarion and Wyll having Issues together and kissing about it. Once again, normal. Note that I did also buy merch for this, because there was cool merch I could actually get! So I have nice stickers and a portkey on top of 200 fics.
Then we enter the Zone Of Shame, the elephant in the room: why does Ram, who spent years of her life deliberately ignoring anything MCU related in any way, shape or form, who actively tried not to know who any of these people were when people told her about it, and who fell asleep before a few of the movies during family movie night, have three folders and about 350 MCU fics on her phone? Why indeed. Well, my best explanation is Daredevil snuck up on me and then I got overtaken by a fever. And now here I am. A changed woman. Scouring blogs from 2012 to get glimpses of what it was like back then.
The two main ships I've been really into are Stucky, because I watched Winter Soldier and I have eyes, though I did kind of hesitate with Stony because yeah I see it, and Thorki, because I watched Thor and I have eyes because I heard it was a thing, got curious, looked into it, and started Seeing It very fast. For about a week I'd watched Thor 1 and I thought, eh, I don't know why everyone was so into this, and then somehow something clicked in my brain I guess?? And then here I am, about three months later, coming out of AO3 searches bloodied and dizzy.
The rest of the changes are minor, I added a class folder for class stuff, a few fics here and there, kept going with Venom and doubled that folder, kept reading porn, planned to read (/actually read!) a few published books, etc. The last notable things are I found like 30 things to add to my misc folder, don't know where, and I somehow got rid of 4 Warrior Cats books? I'm guessing I had duplicates?
In conclusion, this year in fanfic, I read a lot of Mattfoggy, and got really into a beloved fandom classic (Stucky), the most obvious characters I could have gotten into (Astarion and Loki), and a truly "problematic ship" (Thorki). They grow up so fast... Absolutely crazy to me that when I log all the fics I read in a year (and I could have read more!) I end up almost doubling my fanfic folder. I was at 1.7k last year and I added like 1.4k, that was a huge shocker! So many good fics....
(BTW I knew the whoole time I would be insanely into Loki and Tony Stark, and I was Correct. Whatever that kind of character is they're like fucking catnip to me. Immediate blorbo. I need to read more Tony centric stuff but I've been trying not to be so so in love with that guy since I was like 13 so. Hard to break the habit. Astarion is also Like That and as soon as I saw his face I knew and I was once again Correct. I'm predictable.)
This was the 2024 edition of What's Ram Been Reading, it was a delight to have you this year again and it'll be a delight to have you in 2025! Bye bye :)
#this year more than any other beware!! i am into many things. not all of them tasteful (or reflective of my personal interests irl)#Me Going Insane About Fics And Stats. as per usual#genuinely hadn't realised i'd read so much daredevil somehow?? i guess since they're shorter?#anyway three times makes it a tradition for sure <3#fandom nerdery#wow i have a ramble tag now
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Fandom Tag !
i was tagged by the lovely @auds-and-evens & @vintagelacerosette thank you stinks 🥰
Your Name: Elle 😸
Your First Fandom(s): The Hunger Games and Percy Jackson
How did you first get into fandom? I was like 11 so forgive me for not remembering all that well but I honest to god think it was Wattpad 💀 I had always likes to write and I saw that people were writing stories about the books i loved and i was like yeah i gotta do that and now here we are nearing a decade since 😭
How long have you been engaging with fandom spaces? I think I was still in 5th grade when I started reading and writing fanfiction so sufficed to say quite some time
How often do you read fanfics? honestly not very often. I am horrible at consistently reading and like if i have the spare time i would rather write than read BUT i am trying to read more to support my lovely stinky friends and their amazing work 🫶
Top 3 characters from your current fandom(s): Ian Gallagher ofc my favourite man, Mickey That also does without saying and my main woman the woman the myth the legend SHELIA 😩😩😩😩😩😩
Have you ever written a fic for a fandom? if so, shout it out! I have 46 published shameless fics so go read them stinkies 🤨 I will shoutout my favourite(s) though if anyone is in the mood for some galladads
- wasn’t it beautiful running wild till you fell asleep before the monsters caught up to you?
- now i send their babies presents
- but we can patch it up good
- it was as good as our song
Have you ever drawn fanart for a fandom? if so, shout it out! I cannot draw to save my life 😭
Share a personal headcanon that you feel very strongly about: A silly one is that Ian Gallagher is obsessed with SVU idk why thats a constant in my fanfics it just is. An actual serious one I have and I love so dearly is that Carl becomes a social worker. I feel like it makes sense because he wants to help his community out and he went through DCFS so he knows how it feels to be one of those kids. It just makes SO much sense to me especially since it seemed Carl was getting tired of being a cop but still wanted to help. How he passed school? I have no clue. I say Lip and Bryn (my gf oc for him) helped him cheat online school because that feels topical. OH also a fave headcannon is that Ian and Mickey have many many chickens thank you Mel ( @gardenerian ) i am forever obsessed with the chick crew
You're trying to convince a friend to get into your current fandom(s) with you. what episode, clip, or scene are you showing them? That’s actually a funny question for me because once i talked about random shameless plot lines to ky friend for like an hr and she was genuinely so traumatised she couldn’t believe it. another time i showed random clips to a group of my friends i also definitely traumatised them. but then my other two friends started watching the show hc of me. I always say im a plauge on everyone bc we usually end up watching shameless. Bonus my amazing breathtaking spectacular friend had started rhe show a long time ago and is now actively trying to finish it because she wants to read my fanfics 😭😭🥹🫶. I realise i didn’t answer the question but i would show Ian stealing Yev and the sorry im late scene i feel like that encompasses the show pretty well and is enticing
And finally, what does fandom mean to you? This feels like an essay question prompt lol. Idk man a bunch of cool people coming together to make some cool things and consume media together and you know what?? we shlay 🫶
second tag….
name: smelly ellie at your service
age: a year older next week 😇
Where in the world are you? Florida (derogatory)
The meaning behind your UR: Im a gallabitch what can i say i also had this user before i joined the server so maybe im a psychic too
Your second favourite color: my favourite colours are all in a tie with one another so pink yellow and burnt orange are simultaneously my first second and third favourite colour
any pets? my son chidi who is definitely a human inside a cats body
favourite season? Winter! It doesnt get cold here but i can pretend
Last thing you read: The 7 husbands of evelyn hugo i DEVOURED that book i read it in like a day 😭 if anyone wants to chat about this book please come forth
Last song you listened to: (you) on my arm
What are you wearing right now? my work uniform lol i am actively currently not doing my job
A hobby of yours: writing ofc and i would say bitching us also up there. That said i need more hobbies and really wanna (re)learn how to crochet
and finally, what are you up to today? I wish I could say nothing ☹️✊. Gotta finish my shift and then do some school work unfortunately maybe i’ll write a lil who knows!
I’m gonna try and tag some friends i don’t usually in the spirit of fandom ! play along if you please 😌😊
@imikhailo @sam-loves-seb @babygirlmickey @michellemisfit @magnificentcollectivehurricane @secret-gallavich @rereadanon @damnnmilkovich @takeyourpillsbitchh @mickmilkowitch @tear-soaked-cheeksdonteverlast @twinklyylights @milkoviched @firecrxtch @milkovetti @chicanomick @mickeys-been-staying-at-ians @gallavichlover19 @nyhmeriah @ianstummy @mickeys-notebook @filorux @mrmillagher @mixkeymilkovich @too-schoolforcool @adakechi @ian-galagher @tsuga-of-mars @mikhailoaleksandrmilkovich @gallavichgeek @lesbiangallagher @milkovichs @flamingbluepanda @ianspettyagain @callivich 🫶🫶
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Until Dust C 89: It's Not Much, But It's Something
UNTIL DUST CHAPTER 76 :
Word Count: 3,302 Summary: With a bit of sorrow-and a bit of rage-the reader does the best that she can. Loki takes a nap. Warnings: Story is Rated R. Author’s Notes: Hello all, I am sorry for the absence- I have been sick the last two weeks, and in a way that's left me a bit disoriented. I have been writing, but it's been snips and bits of different chapters across the remainder of act 3- so nothing publishable. I have finally managed to get this bit done, and while it's not my most exciting chapter, it is required setup for later. I am a few thousand words each into the next two chapters, so hopefully I can get those up soon as well. Thank you for your patience-you are all so kind and never complain, it means the world <3
Your comments as well always bring me so much joy- I love hearing even the most mundane thoughts or questions- rhetorical or otherwise haha.
Love you all, and hope you are all healthy, happy, and safe.
<3 <3 <3
Evening came gently.
Slipping their fingers through the grass, the twilight winds chased away the heat of the day and guided the people of Asgard indoors. Given that the sun had not fully begun to set, many would find their way back out to seek out good company, a good drink, or -if they were lucky- a bit of both.
The two of you-having returned home a few hours prior-had settled in your room, listening to the the sounds the winds carried. Loki had stepped through the door, shifted form, dried his hair, and nearly thrown himself down-half naked- upon the bed. The bed frame rattled so loudly you both feared it might break; and when he seemed satisfied it wouldn’t, he let his face fall back into the blankets. As you set your things away, you could have sworn you heard him muttering something about ‘remembering that for later’.
Figuring that a quick bath was warranted, you left him where he lay-finding him still there when you returned; stretched out on his back, one arm draped across his eyes to keep out the dwindling light of the day. His chest rose and fell slowly, and he was still enough that you could tell he was half asleep.
Moving as slowly and delicately as you could manage, you rifled through the small sampling of items the servants had left in your wardrobe-the remaining ones, you assumed, likely taking up temporary residence in one of the guest rooms. It took a bit of finding, but eventually you managed to get your hands on some of your older clothes. Specifically, you sought out a dress that had-quite some time ago- been a brilliant marigold yellow; but over the years had been worn and faded to the point that it was almost unrecognizable from its original state. It slipped easily over your head- although you did note, with a bit of pride, that the fabric around the bicep was noticeably tighter than you had remembered.
On light toes you crept up beside the bed, marveling at how quickly and easily Loki had fallen asleep. How many times had you awoken in the middle of the night only to find him fixated on one thing or another? Had you ever seen him fall asleep in the daytime?
As far as you could remember, just once- on the day you found him in the library, fading in and out of sight-back when you had hardly known one another. Despite how much energy maintaining multiple projections took, and how visibly exhausted he had been, Loki had still lingered- simply because you had asked him to explain.
The evening breeze drifted in past the curtains, barely shifting his hair as it lay settled in waves atop the sheets. Although currently shielded beneath his arm, you knew that the dark circles beneath his eyes were not what they had been. He had put less effort into pinning his hair flat against his head, and-after today- there was the faintest hint of color forming against his skin.
You didn’t think the travel or late night had tired him; nor did you believe the pacing, walk, and eventual swim had been enough to wear him down-after all, it had yet to wear you down. With a soft smile you leaned down to place your lips against the top of his head. Of all the people you imagined you would one day find in your bed- a Prince of Asgard had never been one; much less this prince in particular. Still, you dared hope that-just maybe- the reason the God of Mischief lay sleeping silently before you was because he had simply…relaxed.
As your lips touched his skin, you felt Loki jump- guilt quickly washing over you. “Sorry, sorry…” you whispered, placing your hand against his arm as he lifted it from his face. “-I didn’t mean to wake you.”
Pushing up onto his elbows, he seemingly struggled to regain his bearings. “No no, quite alright- I shouldn’t have fallen asleep-” His eyes settled on what you wore, an immediate frown carving its way onto his face. “What are you wearing?”
“Work clothes.” You replied flatly-not too concerned the item in question did not suit the tastes of a royal. “I just meant to tell you I’m heading out back-I won’t be long.”
“I’ll come with you…” He muttered, rubbing the heel of his hand against his eyes. Given just how mumbled his words were, you could tell he was struggling to pull himself free from sleep’s grasp. “-just…give me a moment here and I’ll…”
It took a bit of strength to push his shoulders back down onto the bed. “Though I appreciate it, I can assure you I will be fine.” Taking advantage of the contact, he had locked his hands about your wrists-holding you still so you might continue to hover over him. With a lazy grin, he stared up at you- the light blue of his eyes almost dusty grey in the fading light. “I promise I won’t be gone long.” You assured him.
“Can I ask where you’re going, at least?”
You laughed. “I told you- I will be out back.”
Loki rolled his eyes. “Yes, but where out back.”
“Ah, right…” You fumbled for words in your mind. Just a moment ago you thought you could make it out the door without having to say out aloud-without having to mention the very thing you had been trying so hard to avoid since you had come home.
She was the ghost that roamed the halls-a silent voice that still rang clearly in your mind. Every memory that lurked at the edge of your consciousness threatened to send you into tears if you were not careful- and there were oh so many memories about. Your mother was carved into every inch of this house, which was fitting for a person with so bright a presence.
The smile on your face flickered- you could feel it. The ease with which the expression had come only moments before, was replaced by something stunted and plaster. “The regimen Sif sent along- I’ll need a place to practice…” The corners of your mouth fought hard to pull themselves down. “My… we have one out back- a little training pit- just hasn’t been used in some time im sure. I was going to just go and check…”
The look of concern on his face somehow made it worse. “Are you sure you don’t need company?”
“Very sure.” It suddenly felt very important to exit quickly- to leave the sight of everyone else before the dams broke. As you pulled back, Loki released you with quite a bit of reluctance- but settled back against the bed as you offered him a slightly stronger smile. “I will only be a second.”
He replied with a hesitant nod. “Alright then… I will be here.”
“Don’t let the servants catch you looking like this-” you teased, hoping it might push aside any uncertainty he felt. “-you’ll frighten them.”
He smiled an empty smile- brimming with manufactured conviction that did not quite reach his eyes. “No promises.”
-Continued on AO3-
#loki fanfic#untildust#loki reader insert#loki x y/n#loki marvel#loki x reader#loki x you#loki#loki fanfiction#until dust
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When a book does things to me, I write reviews. I've decided to share them here, too, in case anyone is interested in the stuff I read, my thoughts, and ramblings.
Book review: Under Your Scars by Ariel. N. Anderson ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️/5 Heavy topics mentioned below (listed in the first paragraph) ‼️
Where do I even begin? Perhaps with the trigger warnings I clearly overlooked before diving into this book. While I'll avoid direct spoilers (there’s one, sorry), it’s important to mention that this book contains extremely intense scenes, including graphic violence, drug use, graphic murder, toxic and abusive relationships, terminal illness, Stockholm Syndrome, self-harm, suicide, rape, and explicit sexual content with certain kinks. With all of that, you can imagine just how brutal this story is. And to top it off, it doesn’t have a happy ending. Yet, despite everything, I still ended up reading it. Don’t ask me why or how I found this book—I just did.
Normally, I’m quick to steer clear when I encounter even a few of these trigger warnings. I haven’t had the best experiences with the Dark Romance genre lately, mainly because the stories didn’t meet my expectations. After reading *Under Your Scars*, I’m beginning to question what "Dark Romance" even means. Everything I’ve read before pales in comparison to this novel. It’s undeniably dark and tragic, and while it does contain romance, that's not the first word I would use to describe this story.
I spent days rambling about this book to my boyfriend and my friend Sarah, who both know how profoundly it affected me. Now, a few days after finishing it, I’ve decided I wouldn’t recommend this book. I loved it, but I’m left feeling so empty that I don’t know how I’ll ever move on. I’m not even sure how to feel about Christian, the main male character. All I know is that I fell for him just like Elena did, loving every virtue and flaw he had. I think I fell down the same rabbit hole as Elena because, by the end, I was fully on Christian’s side.
I needed to take a break a few days after reading the first half of the novel. I can’t remember the last time a book made it difficult for me to fall asleep, but this one did after I read chapter 20. Little did I know that the following chapter and the entire second half of the story would be even worse. I can't fathom how the author managed to write so much tragedy.
The best part of this book was definitely the romance, which, in my opinion, was truly well-executed. Many stories with romance leave me unsatisfied because the characters often get together near the end, leaving little time to see them in love and interacting as an established couple. Anderson gave us so much time with Elena and Christian in love that I spent half of my reading time with hearts in my eyes (the other half was spent with tears and sobbing). Although it’s not a slow burn at all, the book's length allows the romance to develop, and I got most of what I always want in a love story. Christian is the perfect lover, and the sexually explicit scenes—aside from a couple that felt unnecessary at the beginning—were not disappointing because they always contributed to the plot’s progression. I guess this is one of the advantages of self-publishing: you aren’t limited to a set page count, giving you the space to develop a love story as you see fit.
However, everything else felt quite rushed. I believe this story would have been better as a duology. The novella written after the novel could have served as an epilogue for a second book, especially considering that the first and second halves of *Under Your Scars* are quite different. The first part focuses on Elena’s life and job, her involvement in the drama with her boss, Christian, and her being stalked by a serial killer called The Silencer. The second part is more focused on Elena and Christian’s relationship and Elena’s traumas, set mostly away from the office. Two separate books would have also given readers a break to recover from all the horrors in this story.
I won’t rate a book based on its trigger warnings. Trigger warnings are there to help you decide if this book is for you or not. The plot is incredible—disturbing but amazing. Christian’s character is one worth exploring in depth because, my god, the complexity of this man is staggering, whether for good or bad. The love story between him and Elena is as tragic as it gets, but their love was honestly the only thing that drove the plot and kept its foundations together. Of course, Elena is gaslit, manipulated, and emotionally abused, and she falls into a severe case of Stockholm Syndrome. But she’s aware of it. In fact—**SPOILER ALERT**—it’s Christian who tells her. As twisted as it may be, the thing that kept me reading was their love and how they acknowledged how messed up they were individually and together.
The reason I lowered my rating for this book is mainly because of how the heavy topics were handled in the narration. At the beginning of the story, there’s a heavy scene of sexual assault described in just four or five paragraphs. I’m not saying we need these scenes to be written in detail—I don’t think I could stomach that—but there are better ways to portray such events than just summarizing something that, in real life, would leave anyone scarred and traumatized for life in a brief paragraph that feels cold and detached. However, Elena’s recovery after what happens to her in chapter 21 felt very realistic, and I was pleased with how the author approached it and how she portrayed Christian during this time. It was a crucial part for me, and I wasn’t disappointed.
Other aspects that could be improved are the way chapters are divided. There’s a chapter towards the end where something significant happens to Christian, and the situation is resolved within the same chapter, even though the event is too heavy to be wrapped up in just ten pages. (Again, the second half of the novel felt rushed.) Another issue is the manuscript of the hardcopy of the book. I understand this is a self-published novel, but that’s all the more reason to ensure that the story is presented in a readable format. The margins on the pages are slightly off, and the font size and line spacing are poor. This book could easily be 700-800 pages, but they squeezed it all into 400.
The most unrealistic aspect of the story, among many smaller details we have to overlook, is Caroline’s adoption. Even though the author acknowledged that it was implausible given Elena’s and especially Christian’s mental states, it really bothered me. I loved seeing them as parents, and Caroline was adorable—I’m glad I got to know her—but considering how little time Elena and Christian had been together and everything they’d been through, they are the last people who should be adopting a four-year-old.
As for the writing, it wasn’t particularly remarkable. It felt too generic at times, with some sentences that seemed straight out of a Wattpad story, which occasionally made it hard for me to stay engaged with the characters. But I won’t dwell too much on that and turn into a nitpicky literary critic because the storyline almost makes up for these shortcomings.
And as for the ending… I just refuse to accept it, so I'm not going to talk about it.
#this book was so heavy that i literally wrote a 1k long review#and by heavy i mean heavy on my mind and heart#it destroyed me in more ways that i ever thought possible#v reads#v reviews#under your scars#ariel n. anderson
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— FUSHIGURO MEGUMI + GOJO SATORU + RYŌMEN SUKUNA + NANAMI KENTO || THEIR S/O FALLING ASLEEP ON TOP OF THEM
↳ featuring : fushiguro megumi + gojo satoru + ryomen sukuna + nanami kento from jujutsu kaisen
↳ warnings : grammar issues
↳ form : headcanons
↳ published : 01 february
↳ pronouns : non specified in headcanon
↳ request : So I think my ask got eaten... ((honestly.. i have bad luck and even on my own blog eats my asks when I'm testing themes 😂)) Can I please request Head canons for Gojo, Sukuna, Fushiguro and Nanami? Their SO falls asleep on top of them? Their S/O has mentioned that thwy have a hard time falling asleep cause they dont usually feel safe? their S/O says they fell asleep cause they feel safe amd protected when they're together? - 🌼
↳ barista’s notes : guys...today was just a whole day of pain. first it was the recent jujutsu kaisen manga chapter and now the new attack on titan episode......gabi can die......ʕ ꈍᴥꈍʔ but moving on from that, i hope you enjoy your cup of classic black coffee (jujutsu kaisen request!) and come again soon ʕ→ᴥ← ʔ
In the beginning, he would be surprised when you suddenly fall asleep on top of him because he is used to him being in the position that you are in.
And when you inform him that you feel safe in his arms when you sleep since you have a hard time beforehand, Fushiguro will blush profusely while looking to the side to hide his face from you.
Fushuguro at first is really hesitant to wrap his arms around your body since he isn’t used to physical touch - even when it’s just the both of you alone - but over time he gets comfortable and just naturally places his arms around you.
He really loves to admire your face at first before beginning to play with your hair because he loves it when you do the same thing when he is on top of you.
While he is holding you, he will either be on his phone scrolling through articles to find out ways to help you sleep when he is not there or reading a book that he was reading to you before you fell asleep.
Fushiguro loves holding your hand when you sleep on top of him - he really finds it a little amusing on how tight you hold his hand despite your relaxed state like you don’t want him to move away from you.
When he needs to go somewhere, like the bathroom or to get a drink, he will summon his divine dog to keep you company - it will lay its head on top of yours.
If you washed your hair that day, he really likes the scent it gives off and will lightly place his nose on top of your head to be comforted by the smell.
Sometimes, Fushiguro will fall asleep with you because with you on top of him, he gets a constant supply of warmth and that leads him to relax extremely quickly.
Overall, Fushiguro is really surprised at this action of yours in the beginning but really begins to appreciate it since that means you really trust him a lot and he is glad that he can take care of you in some way since you do the same with him when he gets beat up quite a bit.
When you fall asleep on top of him, Gojo will find that extremely adorable and just continues to hold you in his arms without a single question.
When you tell him that you feel safe in his arms and that you recently have been having trouble sleeping, Gojo will look at you with glassy eyes while thinking ‘they’re so cute’ in his head.
When it comes to the night and both of you are finished for the day, Gojo will already be in bed with his arms wide open the second you enter his dorm because he invited you.
Gojo loves to leave a few pecks on your face, especially your forehead while stroking your cheek because he thinks you are adorable in his arms - especially the size difference between you and him.
Gojo will always take a few photos of you while you are sleeping since he just wants to keep this into memory.
He will always want you to nap during work and use that as an excuse on why he can’t go to meetings or why you are late.
If someone wakes you up due to him not going to an important meeting, he will get angry at the person since it is rare that you two get to spend some time together.
Before you fell asleep, you and Gojo were probably talking about how your futures looked. For example, a family, marriage (if you ain’t already married) and maybe some future dates/vacations to help you with nightmares if you get some.
If he has to do paperwork that he left last minute, he will make you sit on his lap with your arms around his neck and your head tucked in the crook of his neck since he wants you to feel safe at all times.
Overall, Gojo is really welcoming to the idea of you sleeping on top of him since this is a time where he is allowed to see you vulnerable due to you contrasting attitude in Jujutsu Tech - this time he has with you his most favourite and that fact you rely on him to feel safe makes his ego skyrocket.
For the fun of it, I would say he would push you off...but Imma be nice.
When you first fall asleep on top of him, Sukuna would look at you with an annoyed look while grumbling on how heavy you feel - when in reality you are as light as a feather to him, he’s just being a bitc-
When you tell him that you made him feel safe in his arms, Sukuna would be confused and look at you like you are stupid - because why would you feel safe with the King of Curses.
He will try to push you off at first, but slowly and reluctantly will tightly wrap his arms around you while looking down onto your face with a nonchalant expression displayed on his.
If he feels like you are going to move again, his arms will tighten around you to keep you still - if you are somehow awake, he will say “did I ask you to move?” in like a light threatening tone.
Sukuna will have his hands under your shirt since he wants to feel your skin against his since that’s what is used to when you both finished - assuming you didn’t do it.
When you are sleeping, he will stroke your hair and call you foolish at the same time since he does jokingly mutter that he can kill you right there but for some reason, he doesn’t want to.
Sometimes, he will place a hand on your chest to feel your heart-beating (if he can) - this ain’t the thing you’re thinking, your heart isn’t going to get ripped out - it’s weirdly comforting to him.
If he wants you to wake up, he will move some of your hair and bite your neck since why not….he now wants to be worshipped since your time is up.
Overall, if Sukuna really and truly loves you, he will allow you to lay yourself on top of him for the rare comfort that you will get - even though he calls you foolish for you feeling safe with him, he has a sense of pride to that since he knows that you belong to him and him only.
When you fall asleep on top of Nanami for the first time, he will grumble for a moment before beginning to admire you.
When you inform him that you had a hard time sleeping lately and that you feel safe in his arms, Nanami will pat your head and tell you that you can do it anytime when you need to - which will be every day.
Nanami just wants you to get a full night's rest and doesn’t want you to feel tired throughout the day, but he doesn’t tell you that he loves the feeling of you in his arms.
Nanami loves to leave at least one forehead kiss on your before running his hand up and down your back to comfort you while you are in a slumber.
This is one of the reasons why Nanami doesn’t want to do overtime. He knows that you are either going to stay up since you feel really unsafe or you will try to sleep but you will struggle to.
Like Fushiguro, Nanami is probably reading a book he was reading to you before you fell asleep - I said this before and I will again, his voice really is suited for audiobooks, it’s really soothing.
If you need to sleep during the day - due to him doing overtime - he will allow you to sleep on top of him but away from the public eye since he doesn’t want anyone waking you up, especially Gojo.
During these times when you sleep in the school, he will drape his blazer over you since you both are not in your usual bedroom where the blanket is ready - he wants you to be warm.
If you fall asleep on him on the couch, he doesn’t have the heart to move you both since you look so peaceful but will in like 2-5 hours since he feels like you need to sleep somewhere more appropriate.
Overall, Nanami is the type that will grumble in the beginning but really enjoys times like this with you since he doesn’t have to worry about curses and other things Jujutsu related - all he has to worry is about you feeling safe in his arms.
© violettelueur 2021 : written and published by violettelueur - do not steal or repost
#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jujutsu kaisen headcanons#jujutsu kaisen headcanon#jujutsu kaisen hcs#jjk headcanons#jjk headcanon#jjk hcs#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk x reader#fushiguro megumi#gojo satoru#ryomen sukuna#nanami kento#jujutsu kaisen fushiguro megumi#jujutsu kaisen gojo satoru#jujutsu kaisen ryomen sukuna#jujutsu kaisen nanami kento#jjk fushiguro megumi#jjk gojo satoru#jjk ryomen sukuna#jjk nanami kento#fushiguro megumi headcanons#gojo satoru headcanons#ryomen sukuna headcanons#nanami kento headcanons#fushiguro megumi x reader#gojo satoru x reader#ryomen sukuna x reader#nanami kento x reader
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helloooo, i hope you is doing well today, i was wondering if you could write something where reader and sapnap have a argument and it’s like hella angst and at some point one of them ignores the other but it ends with them making up? idk if that made sense..and she/her pronouns would be preferred but they/them pronouns are 100% okay :))
hello !! im doing well tysm for asking:) sorry for publishing late, im currently sick and practicing for a dance concert!
— LIE LIE LIE! 🐉
pairings: cc!sapnap x fem!reader
warnings: angst, fluff at the end, swearing
the sound of shouting could be heard from the couples room inside the house. they had been arguing once again.
y/n sighed yet again, pinching the bridge of her nose. “that’s the thing sapnap, you did exactly what i did, which i had no problem of it but instead of telling me the truth, YOU LIED TO ME!” y/n shouted at him.
“no y/n, im sick of your BULLSHIT! YOU DO THE EXACT SAME THING, HANGING OUT WITH YOUR ‘GUY BESTFRIEND’ BUT WHEN I DO IT, ITS A PROBLEM? thats not fair!” sapnap said raising his voice high as he ran his hands through his hair frustratedly.
“the difference is, i TELL YOU im going to his house or im spending the day with him. but YOU on the other hand, LIED TO ME AND SAID YOU WERE HANGING OUT WITH PUNZ!” y/n said making her voice softer. she had gotten a head from all the shouting.
“okay it’s not my fault you’re a little INSECURE BITCH Y/N! YOURE JUST SO CLINGY AND ON ME ALL DAY! i just wanted a break.” sapnap said raising his voice once again. “oh” y/n had said before closing their mouth completely. she never thought in a million years her boyfriend sapnap would say something like this to her. after even tell him all her insecurities and self-doubts they had.
sapnap didnt even realise what came out of his mouth until he saw his loving girlfriend with tears threatening to spill out of her eyes. his eyes widened. “y/n im so-“ sapnap began before getting cut off by y/n. “no uhm, its okay, im just a little insecure bitch right? or is it because im clingy?” she said looking in his eyes while tears streamed down, ever so slightly sniffing. “y/n you know i didnt mean-“ sapnap had said once again trying to grab her hands. she yanked them back as she said “oh but you did sapnap, you did. now please just leave me alone” before walking out their shared room.
sapnap stood there loss for words as his mouth hung slightly open, not really processing the fact that he told his girlfriend all those things. he really didnt mean to hurt her, he just wanted some alone time.
y/n walked downstairs, grabbed a blanket and went into the guest room, with tears still running down her face. “y/n? are you okay?” dream asked as he looked up from him phone. “im- yeah im okay.” the girl smiled with puffy cheeks indicating she was crying. dream smiled at the girl with sympathy. he knew already it was one of their fights once again, which is why he came downstairs, but the moment he saw y/n teary eyed and with a blanket walking to the guest room, he knew something else had happened this time. “come here” he said opening his arms to the girl as she ran into them and sobbed.
“thank you” she had said with a soft smile to dream. “no problem” he smiled back. she walked to the guest room and got ready for bed. sapnap on the other hand was losing his shit. he felt guilty for throwing those insults at her knowing that they would hurt her. he felt bad for not telling her where he was going and lying to her. he climbed in the bed and a tear escaped his eye as he fell asleep, just wanting to get over this day.
the next day had come and it was quiet. too quiet for dreams liking. it always had sapnap and y/n either singing while making breakfast of the tv had been on and they were watching tv together. he walked downstairs and greeted y/n, who had been making breakfast in the kitchen alone. she greeted back before handing him his breakfast. they heard footsteps come downstairs, no words being said. “morning guys” sapnap had said rubbing his eyes due to waking up. “morning sap” dream said. y/n kept quiet, handing his plate of food before returning to the guest room. sapnap sighed.
“dude literally what the fuck did you do?” dream asked punching his shoulder. “what- OW dreaaam.” sapanp said groaning. “she’s ignoring you? you guys arent as noisy as normally? hello?” dream said before eating again. “we had an argument” sapnap sighed. “no shit dumbass” dream said scoffing. “and i might have insulted her badly.” sapnap said softly. “how bad?” dream asked curiously. “bad bad, as in insecurities bad” sapnap said. “you motherfucker!” dream said before punching him hard once again. “OW STOP!” sapnap shouted. “you fucked up big time you stupid fuck!” dream said. “i know” sapnap sighed once again, playing with his food and not eating it. “you better apologise.” dream said. “i will, dont worry” sapnap said.
a little later, sapnap walked to the guest room where y/n was. “y/n? can we talk?” he asked as he knocked on the door. no answer. sapnap sighed and thought maybe he should try later.
night time had come around and y/n still ignored sapnap. she had been crying all day overthinking everything, wondering if he still wanted to be with her or not. she heard a knock once again. she walked to the door and opened it to be face to face with her so called ‘lover’
sapnap looked at the girl and studied her. bloodshot red eyes, puffy cheeks, red nose. he felt bad. “can i come in?” he asked softly. “yeah” she replied in the same tone, opening the door wider for him to enter. she closed the door behind him, going to sit on the bed while she waited for him to start.
“where do i start oh god. these 2, well not really 2, but these 2 past days have been so shit without you my love. without your late night cuddles and kisses and us laughing the whole night long. i miss you so damn much. and yes i know what i did was wrong, and i should’ve told you instead of lying to you. im truly sorry for it. i just hope you know that i love you so much baby, and that i cant imagine life without you” sapnap said looking at his girlfriend in her eyes. she didnt reply. he took a deep breath, and nodded before walking out with his head hanging low. “wait” y/n said as she got out of bed and ran to hug him as he turned around. he held his arms tight around her waist as if he were to lose her. “i love you so much my love, im sorry for fighting too. you just wanted time away and i get that, but you could’ve told me so instead of doing all that.” y/n said in his ear while the were hugging. “i will i promise” sapnap said looking at y/n smiling. she smiled back as they leaned in to kiss. they released from the kiss, both smiling and leaned their foreheads against each other.
“now cmon, lets cuddle.” sapnap said as he picked up his girlfriend and carried her to his room. y/n laughed as she held onto him.
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Laisse tomber les filles 7
Warnings: non-consent sex and rape; size kink; age gap; manipulation; sexual acts and dubcon (not explicitly tagged for a surprise but nothing extreme).
This is a dark!fic and Lee Bodecker x (short) reader and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.
Synopsis: You find yourself ostracized on campus by your shyness, but your reticence won’t deter an unwanted suitor.
Note: We back at it again! Happy Tuesday.
Thanks to everyone for reading and thanks in advance for all your feedback. :)
I really hope you enjoy. 💋
<3 As usual, I’d appreciate if you let me know what you think with a like or reblog or reply or an ask! Love ya!
‘When I was nineteen, pureness was the great issue...I saw the world divided into people who had slept with somebody and people who hadn’t, and this seemed the only really significant difference between one person and another. I thought a spectacular change would come over me the day I crossed the boundary line.’
You read and reread the paragraph. You couldn’t help it. The first time you read that book, you just didn’t get the cynicism. There were still parts you couldn’t quite relate to. But that passage sank into you like a pebble in water. You felt changed already and after something so little.
You hadn’t seen Lee since Saturday. He had your number now and called at night. A few times, there was noise in the background; people, cars, life. You realised he must’ve been at a payphone, taking a moment away from his patrol. That was another thing about him; he felt so established, so wise, and that made you feel even less.
When the phone began to ring that night, you ignored it. And when it stopped, you picked up the receiver and dialed the only number you knew. Your mom picked up and you heard the sink running in the background. She was always busy when you called.
“Mom,” you said, “it’s me.”
“Oh, hi, dear,” she replied in her creaky tone, “how are you? Oh, is something wrong?”
“Um… I’m okay, I just wanted to call, I…” you thought of telling her about Lee but you weren’t really sure how. You weren’t even sure why you called her, only that you felt alone. “I miss you and daddy.”
“We miss you, too,” you heard her steps and her grunt as she stretched the cord and twisted off the faucet. “He’s been working hard down at the steel yard and he’s so proud. All the other men tell him to hush up when he brags about you.”
“Yeah? I… I’m working hard. Got an A on my last paper,” you played with the coiled cord.
“That’s great, dear,” she chimed, “are you sure you’re okay? You sound tired.”
“I am tired,” you said, “that’s all. Studying and all that.”
“I hope so. I wouldn’t want you going out late to one of those parties,” she tittered, “Noreen’s son got arrested at one of those and spent a night in jail. They spent their mortgage to get him out.”
“No, no, I don’t, um, go to parties,” you assured, not adding that no one would even think to invite you to one.
“Oh, dear, I’m sorry, I’ll have to call back tomorrow,” she sighed as you heard the door clamour, “your father’s so intent on hurting himself these days.”
“Okay, um, it’s alright, I’ll talk later, love y--” the phone went dead and you listened to the dull tone.
You put the receiver back in the cradle and tapped your fingers on your lips. You picked up your book and sat back on your bed. You couldn’t focus on the words though as your mind lingered on the familiar sounds of home. You missed it terribly. You just wanted to take the bus and go hide in your old childhood bed.
The phone rang again. You knew it wasn’t your mother. You left it and when it silenced, there was only a second before it started again. You waited until the next lull and moved the receiver off the cradle and let the low hum rise from the speaker. You kept it off the hook and closed your book.
You didn’t want to deal with any of that today. Not Lee, not Plath, not the plague of woes that roiled your stomach. You flopped onto your bed and pulled your pillow over your head. You weren’t going to think again until your morning lecture.
📚
You sat near the front of the hall with your elbow on the small fold-out desk. You swirled your pen lazily in the air as you listened to the professor expound on the flaws of historical revisionism. He wasn’t the type to entertain questions or comments, he merely ranted and expected you to note those few words of value amidst the sea of thoughts.
You yawned, exhausted despite an early night. You felt empty and drained those last four days. Ever since…
You didn’t think about it. Tried not to even as it tugged at your mind. When the memory managed to poke through, you felt the same tingle between your legs and your cheeks burned in humiliation.
How had you let it happen? How could you let yourself do that?
You were so confused by it all. How could it be wrong if Lee said it was right? He was older, he was a cop, and he knew much more than you. You never even kissed a boy before him and he was so confident in everything he did that he must be doing it all right.
Besides, after everything, if you refused him, you’d have only been leading him on and using him for his kindness, even if you didn’t realise what you were doing. Because what you did know was that he was a man and you were a woman and that he was doing nice things for you. And you accepted them all. The least you could do was bide his affection. That was the age old exchange, was it not?
“Next week, we’ll review chapters five and six,” the professor’s tone piqued as his ramble subsided, “I expect a class discussion and you can expect ten percent of your mark to be evaluated from your contribution and I will know if you just ‘skimmed’ the introduction.’
The class grumbled as he dismissed you and you stood slowly, stretching the cramp from your leg. You packed up your bag and hauled it on your shoulder. You had a gap between that class and your afternoon publishing class. You trailed out behind the flow of chattering students but found many of them lowered their voices as they came out into the hall.
There voices fell to whispers as they entered the hall. The sight of a brown hat assured you of the reason. Sheriff Bodecker stood against the painted brick and watched the students pass by, each eyeing him nervously and some chuckling under their breaths nervously. You tried to hide behind a taller student but your name tripped you up.
Despite your efforts to maintain your invisibility, he’d spotted you and you knew you could run away. Several of your peers craned around to watch you, no doubt suspecting some trouble on your part. You dragged your feet and stepped out of the tide of fleeing co-eds to stand along the wall with Lee.
“Hi,” you said quietly.
“Young lady,” he said staunchly and kept his eyes on the other students, nodding at them darkly as they passed.
He waited until the hall was empty before he turned on you. You fidgeted and caught your bag as it slipped from your shoulder. Your thoughts wrinkled above your brow and you stared at his brown leather shoes.
“How did you… find me here?”
He was silent as he reached in his jacket and pulled out a folded piece of paper. He opened it and showed you a print-out of your schedule.
“Easy enough,” he tapped his badge nonchalantly, “I was worried. You didn’t answer last night.”
“I fell asleep early,” you said weakly, “morning lecture, you know?”
“Mmm,” he hummed, “not that early.”
“I’m sorry, I was sleep--”
“You’re no good at lying and I don’t like you telling me fibs,” he growled, “you playin’ around with me, honey.”
“No, I…” you blinked as he folded the paper back into his pocket and pushed his jacket back to settle his hand on his pistol.
“Did you forget who I am? What I am?” he arched a brow darkly.
“N-No, sir, I… I got schoolwork and--”
“You can’t stop and talk to me for ten minutes?” he challenged, “you hurt me, honey. I’m out on patrol all night, in danger, and the only thing I got to look forward to is hearing your sweet voice.”
“I, um, I… er, I’m confused,” you eked out, “I don’t know… I…”
“Honey,” he leaned in and his hot breath glossed over you as he lowered his voice, “you know what this is, we both know what a bad girl you were on Saturday.”
“I didn’t…” you swallowed and choked on your voice, “I gotta go to the library--”
You tried to turn away but were pulled back by his tight grip on your arm. He forced you against the wall and knocked the wind from you as your bag tumbled from your arm. You gasped and stared up at him in fright. In that moment, he seemed bigger than ever; taller, thicker, and strong as hell. Stronger than you for sure.
“You don’t go nowhere ‘less I say you do,” his other hand shifted on his gun, “you got me?”
“What are you-- I didn’t… why are you being mean?”
“Me? Honey pie, you been avoiding me and I’m mean?” he snarled.
“I wasn’t avoiding you, I’m just... busy,” you whimpered as he squeezed your arm so tight it throbbed, “you’re hurting me.”
“You’re hurting me,” he hissed, “you think I got time to be comin’ down here on duty to find you?”
“You didn’t have to--”
“I did,” he barked, “I had to make sure you weren’t hussyin’ around with any other boys, like I found you last week.”
“I told you, that wasn’t--”
“Shhhhh,” his hand flew to your chin and forced your mouth shut, “I don’t got the time for this, honey. I’ll be around tonight and you’ll wear a pretty dress for me, won’t you?”
You clenched your jaw and nodded stiffly as his thumb toyed with your lip. He smiled and the tension left his grasp.
“Good girl,” he drew away and squared his shoulders, “you be ready at six and don’t keep me waitin’ again.”
“Yes, sir,” you croaked.
“Mmm,” he nodded with a smirk, “you know, I think I do prefer ‘sir’.” He bent and kissed your lips before you could turn away. You let him and he stood straight again and adjusted his belt, “six o’clock, honey pie.”
#lee bodecker#dark lee bodecker#dark!lee bodecker#lee bodecker x reader#fic#series#dark fic#dark!fic#laisse tomber les filles#the devil all the time#college au#au
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Calling Home (5) | Frankie Morales x Reader
Summary: You are a receptionist at the VA. Frankie Morales keeps calling. Yearning ensues…
Rating: E (18+ only)
Warnings: age gap (legal), dilf!frankie, praise kink, voice kink, size kink, low self esteem, discussion of addiction/ptsd/trauma/triggers, divorce drama, no use of y/n, no beta reader, DDLG🎀, unprotected piv sex, oral m and oral f, hickies galore👅, mild BDSM (cuffs⛓, choking).
Masterlist here
AN: Whatta ride... but all things come to an end🥺. i'm blown away by the support for this fic. Thank you all 💕.
Chapter Five
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Frankie had his own mental list of stuff he needed to do before you would arrive. He dunged out his closet to make room for your clothes. It was long overdue. He had a lot of things he didn’t wear anymore that needed to go. He went out and bought some more plates and silverware since his two plates and Rosie’s plastic plates would not do. He no longer looked around his home with a sense of loneliness, now he pictured all the places you could fit in. He could see you reading by the window in the living room so he bought a comfy new chair to put there. He noticed your small plant collection in your apartment and thought you’d maybe like a bigger one in the back yard so he bought a planter box.
He was reading your novel, titled Our Little Kingdom, while your candle burned. You didn't give it to him at first. While you were in the bathroom and Frankie washed your dishes, he noticed a stack of papers poking out in the trash. It was your manuscript. When you came back and saw him reading it you tried to take it back but Frankie insisted and you caved. It was good. Frankie wasn't just saying that because he loved you. He could see how great writers had influenced you and still it was uniquely your voice. The story, too, was compelling. He couldn't help but imagine you as the protagonist as she was just as sweet and clever.
You were making good progress on your list. You had put in your two weeks notice and started to applying to jobs in Miami. You enjoyed working with veterans so you hoped you could do something similar again. As two weeks went by you were disappointed you still hadn't heard back from job interviews. Packing was a little more difficult. You didn’t know what was worth taking and what was worth leaving. You knew Frankie had most everything already so it was a matter of picking your most special things. The rest you were slowing taking to Goodwill in batches.
You had completely forgotten you sent your book in to publishers until a flurry of emails came in on the same day.
Frankie woke up in the middle of the night to his phone ringing. He sat up pulling the phone towards him. It was you. Why would you be calling so late? Maybe something was wrong?
“Frankie?” You sounded congested. He heard a sniffle. Frankie furrowed his brow at that.
“Hey. Is everything all right?”
“ They-they-“ you could barely get it out “they rejected me.”
“Who?”
“All of them. All of the book agencies.” You threw yourself onto your bed, hot tears running down your face.
“Oh no! I’m so sorry, sweet pea.” Frankie didn’t know whether to be sad or angry. He thought your book was amazing. He sat up and flicked on the bedside lamp. “They’re idiots. Every one of them.”
“They’re experts, Frankie.” You felt more tears leak from your eyes. “Maybe I’m just not a good writer. Maybe-Maybe-" You hiccuped and low cry slipped from your mouth. You covered your mouth, taking in raking breaths. It was agony to admit this to him when he believed in you most. You felt like you had let him down. Frankie's heart literally ached in his chest as he listened to your quiet weeping over the phone. He waited for you to continue, feeling his own eyes grow misty.
“Don’t disappear on me, little pea. Let me hear that voice of yours.”
You were unable to speak. Scared of what may come out. You felt like your walls were closing in around you and mocking you. How did you ever think you could be a writer like all your favorite authors? You were so stupid, you thought.
“I let you down.” You said shakily.
“No no no, little pea.” Frankie said quickly. “You could never let me down. I don’t need to a book agent to tell me you’re a good writer. I know you’re writing is beautiful and perfect. Just like you.”
His praise caused another wave of tears from you.
“Daddy…” You bawled.
“I hear you, baby.” Frankie heard his own voice shake with emotion. He never hated the distance more than he did in this moment. He needed to wrap you up in his arms. “Close your eyes, sweet pea. Use that big imagination of yours. Pretend I’m there with you.”
“Imagination isn’t good enough, daddy.” You blubbered, fat tears slipping from your eyes.
“I know, baby.” Frankie’s heart was breaking. “But try for me okay?”
You clamped your eyes shut and tried to focus in on his breathing on the other end of the phone. Frankie did the same, closing his eyes.
“Good, sweet pea. Focus on daddy.” He wished he was there to comfort you, wrap you up in his arms and shield you from the cruel cruel world. “I’m next to you. I’m holding you so tight.”
“Hold me tighter!” You begged holding your pillow pet to your chest.
“Okay. I just did.” Frankie whispered closing his eyes as if it would be more real. “Feel that?”
“Yeah…” A moment went by as you steadied your breathing. Tears eventually stopped falling, drying against your cheeks. Frankie’s steady breathing anchored you.
“I loved your book. It was really really good. And fuck it, I’ll publish it myself.” Frankie couldn't help but raise his voice.
“Silly.” You sniffled.
“I’m serious, sweet pea. Who needs those stuck up assholes.”
“Hmm yeah, you’re right.” You agreed, voice softening with sleepiness. You pushed your face into your pillow. You could still smell Frankie if you really focused. "I miss you, Frankie."
"I miss you, too."
"I still haven't heard from any jobs. And- maybe I'm just not good enough and-" You felt more tears fill your eyes.
"Shhh shhh" Frankie interrupted "Listen to me. You are the best. The right thing will turn up i'm sure of it."
"But it's the only thing left on the list!"
"I know..." Frankie pulled over your copy of the list that you wrote for him. He had crossed things off as you reported to him. "Let's see if they get back to you tomorrow." Maybe he was being too hard on you, making you get a job first. He only wanted to put it on there to give you some independence over the move. He didn't want you to feel like you had nothing to do once you got here.
Frankie waited until your breathing evened out. He called your name quietly. When he got no response he assumed you fell asleep. He didn’t want to hang up. He missed you so fucking much and he felt helpless.
When he woke up the next morning, he said goodbye to Rosalia as usual, called in sick, and started driving north. Fuck the list. You were coming home with him now.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Of course Frankie called you telling you he was on his way. You felt bad for making him miss work but your excitement overpowered any guilt. You set a timer for 14 hours and started packing with new energy. Your eyes were still puffy from your tears last night. But you repeated what Frankie said like a mantra. Who needs those stuck up assholes. There were tons of ways to self publish nowadays. It didn’t have to be through a publishing house.
When you ran out of things to clean up and pack, you watched out the window waiting to see Frankie’s blue pick up. You had changed into sleep shorts and a t shirt. While you had a plan to dress more sexy you ended up accidentally packing that surprise in one of the boxes earlier today. It was getting dark when Frankie finally pulled up. He looked exhausted but still… Frankie. He was wearing his favorite hat and grey t shirt. You ran down to the street to meet him. He’s pulling empty boxes from the bed of the truck when he sees you sprinting towards him.
“Sweet pea!” He smiled as you launched yourself into his arms. “Oof.” You buried you face in his shirt inhaling his scent. He rubbed your back affectionately enjoying having you back in his arms. “Aw… it’s okay. It’s okay now.” He murmured when he heard you sniffle. He oddly felt his chest swell with pride at how much you missed him. He never had to worry about how you felt about him. He peeled your head off him by stroking your head. You looked up at him with a watery smile. “You ready to blow this popsicle stand?”
You snickered at his dad phases. “I’m ready. Well… I still have some stuff I need to pack up. Too heavy.”
“That’s what I’m here for.” Frankie kissed you chastely. You pulled him in for more though, fisting his shirt in your hands. “Mmm no no. Work first. Play later.” Frankie pulled back. You pouted but have to agree with his logic. The faster you packed the faster you could leave.
Back in your apartment Frankie got to work taking apart your bed and dresser. You finished packing your clothes and dusting.
“Hey what’s this? It was under the bed.” Frankie walked over holding a gift bag with pink tissue paper sticking up.
“Oh…” You quickly grabbed it away. “That’s supposed to be a surprise. For Rosie.”
“You got her a present?” Frankie was touched by your thoughtfulness.
“Yeah I mean… I figured it might make her like me more.”
“She already likes you, but she can never have too many toys.” Frankie stepped further into your space. You realize at that moment how sweaty he was from moving all the furniture. It was so late at night and you were both exhausted but the sudden rush of his thicker smell made you feel wide awake. “Can I see what you got her?”
You handed the package back over, watching him gingerly move the tissue paper to the side. His eyes softened when he saw the pink unicorn pillow pet sitting in the bag. A mini version of yours.
“Am I too presumptuous making us matching? I don’t know if she likes unicorns and-" Frankie cut you off, dropping the bag and kissing you up against the wall. He wasn't even sure what part of that turned him on, just your sweetness and wanting to be a part of his family. He held your face in his hands, his grip forcing your mouth open. You felt yourself start to grow wet. You loved when he just went caveman on you. Sometimes he didn’t have the words to express how much he loved you so he reverted to touch; to deep kisses and deep thrusts. His hands trailed down your exposed legs so he could lift you up on his hips. You held onto his shoulders as he swung you around. The bed was gone, the couch was gone.
"Fuck. Hang on."
You laughed as he ran you out to the kitchen to set you down on the counter. You pawed at his pants trying to undo his belt, but Frankie was faster, unhooking your bra from under your shirt and then pulling your shirt over your head. He took your hand and placed it over his large bulge between his legs.
“Feel what you do to me…” He gritted through his teeth his chest rising and falling sharply.
“Frankie- oh my god-please let me” You pulled he belt loose. At first he stops you. “I didn’t get to last time. Please?” He bit his lip considering your plea. He really just wanted to give and give and give to you. But he had been mean last time, not letting you touch his cock. So this time he doesn’t stop you as you unbutton his pants and pull him out of his boxers. You licked your lips as his cock fell into your hand, curving up towards you.
You hopped off the counter, getting onto your knees before him. “Take off your shirt… please?” He obliged. You kissed down his belly feeling it tighten against your lips. He watched you with fire in his eyes, his mouth slightly parted. You pushed the rest of his pants and boxers down. You stroked him slowly with both hands.
“You have to tell me what you like…” You held his cock and licked a long stripe from the base to the head making him moan weakly. You repeat the motion adding a few kitten licks at the end, lapping up the stray drops of salty precum. Frankie was struggling to think let alone speak. He gripped the countertop above you, his other hand going to the back of your head.
“Just- go slow.” You followed his instructions, slowly taking his length in your mouth. “Good-good girl.” He clenched his jaw staring down at the sight. Your hot mouth felt like heaven and your innocent eyes staring up at him was just the cherry on top. You took his dick as far as you could before you choked lightly. You were by no means an expert at giving blowjobs but you were frustrated you couldn't go further. Your jaw was already aching from his girth.
“Mm don’t hurt yourself, baby.” He hissed unable to hold his hips still, he jerked a little against you making you whine. “Come back up, remember to breathe.”
You slowly pulled off his cock before going down again. Frankie’s hand on your head gently guided you so you didn’t hurt your throat. You added suction, applying pressure on the underside of his cock. You started to find what he liked based on his sounds. You still couldn’t take him all the way in your mouth, tears gathered in corner of your eyes from the effort. Your hand pumped the rest that wouldn’t fit.
“Oh fuck.” Frankie gasped his hips jerking again making his cock slide back into your mouth. You moved one of your hands to his hips looking up at him to say it was okay. “Are you-you want me to fuck your mouth, sweet pea?” You nodded eagerly. You put one of you hands on his length where he wouldn’t fit. He gathered up some of your hair in a makeshift ponytail and slowly thrust into your mouth. Like he always did, he waited for you to nod and give him the okay. When you did, he couldn’t help the growl that left his throat. Drool leaked from your mouth onto your chest as he sped up using your head more forcefully. You were sure you had soaked through your panties. It turned you on so much to see him take control, use you for his pleasure, but still his grip on you was firm and gentle. Every grunt went straight to your pussy. “Such a good girl letting me use this hole, too.” He rasped. “You’re crying around my cock.”
“Mmhm” You hummed around his dick making him groan. He was close. He was battering the back of your throat. You could recognize the furrowed brow and the tightening of his balls. You intensified your ministrations.
“Good girl, good-I’m gonna cum in your little mouth.” He pulled out of your mouth with a wet pop. “Stick out your tongue, sweet pea.” He ordered. You obeyed, watching greedily as he fisted himself harshly the tip of his cock hitting your tongue. You placed your hands on either side of his tummy, anticipating his load. His chest was flush and his eyes were fluttering shut. When he came he yanked your head up harshly as cum splashed onto your tongue. You loved this perspective, watching his face contort with pleasure. You tried to take every drop but some dripped down your chin. “Swallow.” Frankie ordered roughly still maintaining his grip on your head. You swallowed, his warm cum sliding down your throat.
“Thank you, daddy.” You smiled up at him, wiping some of the stray cum off your chin. He let go of your hair, now stroking your head then your jaw. “Did I do well?”
“So good.” He chuckled and helped you stand, his breath still ragged. You squirmed pressing your thighs together. The move not missed by Frankie. “Did sucking my cock make you wet, sweet pea?”
You nodded shyly before saying “It’s okay though. You don’t have to-it’s late and we have a long drive tomorrow.”
“You’re always looking out for me but what kind of man would I be if I left you all needy. But you have to ask for it, sweet pea.”
“I kinda just want your mouth if that’s okay?” You asked feeling too tired for a full round of sex.
“Of course.” Frankie smiled. “Your mattress is still in the bedroom.” He led you in and helped settle you on the center of the mattress. He pulled your shorts and underwear off, staring at your slick reddened pussy. "You soaked your little panties, sweet pea. Did you touch your little flower while I was gone?" Frankie asked, pulling apart your legs.
"I-I tried to. But it wasn't the same."
"How come, little pea?" His patronizing tone had your cunt clenching. He was teasing you.
"It wasn't your fingers. I needed you." You huffed, trying to push his head down onto you.
"Mmm poor thing." Frankie chuckled, the rich sound giving you goosebumps. He felt his cock start to harden again despite you just sucked the soul out of him moments ago. He slowly licked up your slit moaning at the taste of you. Your head tipped back as he he slowly inserted a finger into you. "Eyes on me." He instructed. You forced your head back down so you could make eye contact. "Play with your tits for me." You obeyed, squeezing the flesh in your hand. He returned to his task, taking your clit in between his lips, quickly escalating your climax. Your hands never stood a chance. He inserted a second finger, curling it against you. They were so thick and long it hit that spot deep inside you it made you gush.
"Oh my god. Daddy-I'm-" You teetered on the precipice your breath caught in your throat. Your entire body erupted in flames as your mouth open in a silent scream. Frankie's eyes widened as your pussy strangled his fingers before fluttering uncontrollably. Your cum dripped onto his hand, he quickly replaced his fingers with his tongue trying to catch it all.
"That's it." He felt you finally take a shaking inhale. "Breathe, sweet pea. Breathe." Exhaustion hit you hard as every muscle relaxed.
"I'm sleepy..." You slurred.
"It's okay. You can go to sleep." Frankie leaned up kissing you, smearing your slick all over your mouth. He returned to licking your pussy less aggressively though. "I got you."
You nodded before drifting off.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The next morning you dump the last of your stuff at goodwill, packed the truck, turned in your key, and hit the road. You were bouncing in your seat with excitement. You hadn’t ever traveled south of DC. The landscape was beautiful. You and Frankie took turns driving, belting Fleetwood Mac on repeat. You forced Frankie to take obligatory selfies to remember the journey at rest stops or whenever the view was worthy. Over halfway to Miami you paused at a rest stop for a quick nap. Frankie was anxious to get you home and he didn’t want to stay put for too long. He was used to long drives and quick naps, but you weren’t. He didn’t want to exhaust you because there was so much he wanted to show you when you arrived. You laid across the backseat of the truck with your head in Frankie’s lap as the sun was going down.
In the early morning Frankie finished the drive. His own excitement increased when he was back in the city. You had your head nearly sticking out of the window looking at everything. You couldn’t believe how sunny and warm it was here. Frankie turned down a residential street. “Almost there.” He said. You buzzed in your seat.
Frankie made one last turn into a driveway. You instantly got warm feelings looking at the house. It was painted seagull grey with white trim. It was wonderfully symmetrical with two windows on the first and second floor with window boxes outside the first floor window. The front yard was nicely mowed.
“Your house is so cute!” You hopped out of the car, your legs enjoying the chance to stretch. The air smelled slightly salty being so close to the beach. The sun felt wonderful on your skin. You could have laid down in the grass and just fallen asleep.
Frankie showed you around his house with your hand in his, pointing out random things of importance in his giddy state. You followed him around with bright adoring eyes. Despite looking forward to this moment for a while, you barely looked at anything except for him. You could care less about where the tile for the fireplace came from. You didn’t remember Frankie’s story about how Will messed up his back moving in Frankie’s couch in because it was hitting you over and over again that you were home with Frankie. You didn’t pay attention to the story behind Rosie’s crib because Frankie was here with you. His warm hand holding you close like you may disappear. He was here with that damn cute excited voice as he showed you around his home, soon to be your home.
“Sweet pea? Earth to sweet pea?”
“Hmmm?” You smiled apologetically. Standing in the kitchen, the sun pouring in from the window above the sink bathed Frankie in golden light making him look ethereal.
“I said- we should start moving boxes in before it gets dark.”
“You haven’t shown me everything yet.” You realized.
“What did I miss?”
“Your room…” You swung your entwined hands back and forth.
“Our room, sweet pea.”
“So I won’t be sleeping on the floor?” You laughed.
“Never.” He kissed you briefly. “I just haven’t cleaned up in there and I need to make some space for your stuff and-“
“Frankie.” You quiet his rambling with another kiss. You couldn’t stop kissing him. “Your house is immaculate. That’s the room I want to see.”
He swallowed harshly before he led you up the stairs and down the narrow hallway to his room. While showing you the garden and the other rooms he was giddy but now he seemed more flustered. When you opened the door you could see why. Your candle was sitting on his bedside table. It was the first thing you saw when you walked in.
You immediately break away from him, going to inspect his bedside table. Glimpses of Frankie that made you love him all the more. Your candle, your books, your list, his sergeant pin, and an old alarm clock.
“Was this what you’re so embarrassed about?” You asked picking up the candle. It was almost used up. He averted his gaze. The back of his neck bright red which you recognized as a sign of his nervousness. “Frankie…” You set it down and took both his hands in yours. You couldn’t even convey what it meant to you. He had missed you that much that he burned your candle.
“I have the real thing now.” He said pulling you against his chest, dragging his nose over your cheek in reverence. You hummed in contentment. “This is our room, sweet pea. Our home.” He whispered.
“Our bed.” You added moving his hands to rest on your ass, wrapping your own around his neck.
“Eager girl.” He tutted, kissing just below your ear, squeezing your ass lightly.
“I can’t help it. I’ve waited so long, Frankie.” You tilt your head up resting your forehead against his.
“You’ll never have to wait again, princesa pea. I’m here.”
“Then I want you now.” You tugged him towards the bed. Falling down onto his comforter you were hit by a puff of his scent. Laundry detergent, old spice, and that indescribable musk that was Frankie. You barely got a chance to enjoy it before Frankie is falling on top of you. You laughed as he pulled you up the bed until you’re against the pillows. He's about to rip your clothes from you but-
“Wait wait- I have a gift for you.” His eyes lit up.
“Frankie…” You smiled “You didn’t have to get me anything.” He pushed away from you, walking over to his dresser. He pulled out a small package.
“Here.” He handed it to you.
You sat up. You felt guilty you didn’t get him a gift. You slowly peeled back the tape trying to save the paper. It was wrapped so nicely.
“Come on, rip it up. It’s just paper.”
“No… I wanna save it.” You argued, pulling it open finally. You stared down at the contents in your lap. It was a book with a pink cover and loopy writing. Our Little Kingdom. “Frankie… this is- this is my book.” You felt your eyes swim with tears.
“I know.” Frankie knelt in front of you. “I read it and it was so good. I wanted to get it bound. I was serious when I said want to publish it. I want to make it happen. But if you don’t want to at least we can enjoy it how it’s meant to be enjoyed.”
You flipped through the pages smelling the fresh paper. You reached the end and noticed Frankie had slipped in something as a book mark. It was a torn half of a check. “This is…”
“The check I tore up. I use it as a bookmark so I thought you would-“
You launched yourself at Frankie, a habit you learned from him when words were just simply not enough.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When you woke up, you were surrounded by Frankie’s scent, warm sun hitting your face. Frankie wasn't there. You heard movement downstairs. You threw on the first shirt of Frankie's you could find. You practically skipped down the stairs, heart leaping when you saw Frankie in his PJ pants and nothing else sitting at the kitchen table. His body was lit up in the morning sun, he looked like a goddamn dream. He was shoveling some cereal into his mouth but he stopped when he noticed you. He still looked so sexy to you in this moment, his strong arms and big hand gripping the small spoon. His chest littered with small hickies you made. You blinked a couple of times wanting to imprint this image into your brain forever.
“What are you doing up so early?”
“The sun woke me up!”
“Shit. I would have made you some breakfast or something.”
“That’s okay.” You smiled going to stand in front of him. You kissed him, licking some of the milk from his lips. Your hands rested on his bare golden shoulders. You loved how wide they were and how solid and warm they felt.
“Mmm is this mine, sweet pea?” He tugged at the Fleetwood Mac shirt hanging down to your thighs.
“No, it’s another boys.” You teased.
“Don’t joke about that, little pea.” Frankie warned with a small swipe to your ass.
“I’m sorry, daddy.” You giggled. “I was only joking. No one else has cool shirts like you.”
“You want some cereal? I can also make eggs or pancakes or-“
“I want-” You slipped your hand over his pants. You could feel his slightly hard cock sitting below. “This.”
“You already had some last night and you still want more?” Frankie groaned his thighs spreading further around you. “I thought you’d be sore, sweet pea.”
“I am.” You admitted kissing him quickly. “but I still want you.”
“Mmm…” Frankie pulled your hand away watching you pout. “I think you need to eat something first.”
“No I don’t!”
“Come on, I’ll let you sit on your special seat.” He tapped his thigh. You debated this. You decided to do what he asked, not wanting to test your luck so early in the day. You hopped up on his lap wiggling back until his semi hard cock was pressed against your back. Your thighs sitting over his legs, your pussy peaking out from his shirt. Frankie rested his big hands on your bare thighs rubbing the skin back and forth. You closed your eyes enjoying his touch. You could feel his breath against your neck as he looked down at the sight.
“Do I look good on my special seat, daddy?” You asked looking up at him.
“Perfect, my little pea.” Frankie smiled. He pulled the cereal over and you popped a bite in your mouth. You didn’t normally like cereal but since Frankie asked…
“Okay, done. I’ve eaten.”
“Woah I hardly call that eating.” Frankie shook his head. He placed a hand on your stomach, fingers splayed out over the entire width almost. He applied a little pressure which had you squirming again. God his hands were so big and warm just above where you needed him. “I can feel little rumblings telling me you’re hungry, sweet pea.” You rock against him more intentionally making him catch his breath.
“Not for cereal.” You bit your lip.
“One more bite, sweet pea. For daddy?” He rubbed his beard into your neck which never failed to make you to laugh.
You took another spoonful of the soggy cereal before looking up at him for approval. He chuckled as you chewed quickly. You looked so cute with your cheeks full. It made cock ache.
“Good job, sweet pea.” He smirked when you swallowed it all. He lowered his hand down to cup your pussy which was already dripping. You hand flew to his thick forearm.
You melted against him as he rubs your clit slowly. Last night was hurried and desperate but now it was like he had all the time in the world. You listened to him take large inhale against your neck, smelling you.
“You look so beautiful, sweet pea. In my shirt. In our kitchen.”
“Fuck…” You moaned. His fingers felt so wonderful and thick against you. You fucking loved the sound of that. Ours.
“I’m gonna fuck you on our table.”
He lifted you up with ease, pushing your back down on the table. The sun coming through the window bathed your body in soft light. You looked divine. Frankie had your legs spread wide, tongue on that pussy before you could even blink. “Holy shit. Daddy!” Your hands clenched into fists at your side.
“Sweet pea.” Frankie pulled off, lips wetted by your slick. You blushed under his hot gaze. “Why don’t you pull my hair?”
You whimpered as he took your little fist and put it in his beautiful locks. “I want to but… the last person I was with didn’t like it.” You turned your head to the side trying to hide your embarrassment. His hair felt like silk in your hands.
“Hey-“ Frankie gently grabbed your chin and turned you to look at him. “You don’t have to hide anything from me.” He was leaning over you, invading all your senses, but of course the aspect that hit you hardest was his voice. Soft and reassuring. That rich baritone that made you fall in love in the first place. “Pull my hair, baby, I wanna know how well I treat this pussy. You won’t hurt me.”
You nodded feeling your eyes wet with tears. His affection never ceased to shock you. He kissed you, softening your worried look with each stroke of his tongue. When you were relaxed, he returned to your pussy. He was a fast learner for the times, applying the pressure you needed with his tongue while hitting that spot inside your walls with his fingers. Your hands were laced in his soft hair tugging almost unconsciously.
“Fuck-Daddy" You gasped feeling your breath. Your stomach tightened but you still felt like you weren't quite to your breaking point. "I can't- I need- I need-"
"What, sweet pea, what do you need?" Frankie paused, looking at you struggle above him. You grabbed his hand which was holding your hip and moved it to your throat. "Holy shit." Frankie's eyes widened.
"I need you to push me over-" you struggled to think of how to explain it but Frankie started applying light pressure over your throat making your cunt tighten around his fingers. The strain on your airway finally brought you to the edge. He returned to your clit and didn’t let up even as your walls clamped and gushed around his fingers. Didn’t stop as your back arched off the table, your toes curled, and your hands pulled his hair almost painfully. He let go of your throat when you tapped his wrist and your breath returned ragged and sharp, extending your orgasm. You brushed some of Frankie’s hair from his forehead and he looked up, making eye contact, as his lips suckled on your clit lightly. You didn’t say anything for a moment, feeling your body come down from that peak, basking in Frankie’s loving gaze between your legs. You felt boneless.
“I love you.” You murmured. Frankie surged up, capturing your lips in a wet kiss. He pulled back and kissed the happy tears falling from your eyes that you didn’t realize had fallen.
“I love you, too. I’m never letting you go.”
“I’m not going anywhere. I’m home.” You wrapped your legs around his waist, needing to feel that promise inside you. Needing his promise filling you up.
“Are you sure you’re not too sore?”
“I’m sure.” You ran your hand through his hair, now addicted to the feeling of it.
Frankie slowly eased himself into your pussy. It was harder without lube. You winced a little once he was fully inside. Fuck he was so big.
"Am I hurting you?" Frankie felt bad and started to pull out.
"No please." You arched your back trying to hold him inside. "I'm okay. I want- I want-."
"Sweet pea..." He bit his lip as he struggled to resist thrusting into you.
"And if I can't walk- then you can carry me." You wiggled your hips. Frankie couldn't help but laugh at that not that he minded carrying you around. "Please, daddy." You asked one last time as you dug your heels into his lower back. Frankie placed his hands on your waist and started fucking into you slowly, withdrawing almost all the way out before thrusting back in again.
“I’m so proud of you… taking my cock like a good girl.” He kissed you softly, moving to kiss a train down your neck to your nipples and back up. "You're home now." You nodded in agreement. "This is our little kingdom, sweet pea.” Your shallow breaths slowly transformed into moans. You felt your muscles relax a little and signaled he could start moving faster.
Needless to say the cereal on the table shook and spilled as he fucked you. Spilled milk on your table. His cum spilled inside you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Frankie enjoyed hosting so much since Rosie’s birthday he wanted to have a Fourth of July barbecue. With your help he took the decorations to the next level. Hanging fairy lights over the patio, and renting a bouncy castle for the kids. In an act of irrational niceness, you had said it was okay if Laura came by, that way Rosalia would be there too.
Frankie was clear he had no desire to hide you. He wanted to show you off. Still, you dreaded meeting Frankie's ex. Rosalia had warmed to you quickly even preferring you to hold her. You already loved her so much. Today she wanted you to follow her everywhere and watch her play. Frankie was stuck behind the grill but he still could watch his girls playing. You were wearing a lovely red sundress which Frankie was looking forward to stripping off. It brushed your thighs in the breeze and it was perfect height for Rosalia to tug on when she wanted to be picked up.
“You’ve done a great job with the decor.” Laura appeared at Frankie’s side.
“Thanks.” Frankie smiled tightly. Her surprised tone confirmed that she always underestimated him.
“You’ve been happier lately.” Laura studied Frankie.
“I guess.” Frankie shrugged turning one of the hot dogs for something to do.
“It just has me remembering the old days. Before everything with you happened.” Frankie prickled at that last statement. Everything with you. She always put it on him totally forgetting how she also made things worse.
“Frankie?” You appeared at his other side, eyeing Laura warily and doing little to hide your dislike. You had seen from yards away how Frankie tensed up, looking down. You wouldn’t let that slide so you went over. Finally removing your glare from his ex wife you look up at him, laying a reassuring hand over his forearm. “Uh- people are getting hungry. How soon until it’s done?”
“It’s ready now.” Frankie smiled down at you, instantly feeling more at ease. His answer let you know he was okay.
“Great I’ll wrangle everyone.” You smiled before darting back to the crowd.
“Who is that?” Laura frowned. “Someone's babysitter?”
“No.” Frankie shut off the grill facing his ex wife face to face. “She’s my girlfriend.”
“Girlfriend?” Laura sounded skeptical. “She’s 12.”
“She’s a woman.” Frankie corrected her. “A woman I love very much.” He wasn’t going to listen to anyone look down on you.
“You should have talked to me before you brought her around Rosie.” Laura huffed, putting a hand on her hip.
“You had no problem parading your boyfriends around during our divorce.” Frankie shot back quickly looking to make sure they couldn’t be heard. “It’s in the court records so I doubt you want to bring it up.”
“Frankie…” Laura seemed to regret what she said.
“Let’s just… move on.” Frankie said as people started to draw near.
“Papa!” He heard Rosie squeal, toddling towards him.
“Rosie!” He picked her up, his anger instantly melting away. “Ready for your hot dog?”
As Frankie and the others started filling up their plates Laura crept closer to you as you were cleaning up some of the kid’s mess by the pool.
“Excuse me. I don’t think we’ve met. I’m Laura.” She extended her hand. She was taller than you. Her face was tight as if she was holding in her sneer.
“Hi.” You decided to be nice, shaking the woman’s hand. You introduced yourself.
“So… you and Frankie. “
“Yes.”
“How long has that been going on?”
“A few months.” You said keeping it vague.
“And it’s going well?”
“Yes.” You grew annoyed by her vague questioning. Obviously it was going well since you were here. Her eyes were the total opposite of Frankie's. Hard and cold and icy blue. You quietly thanked god that Rosalia had inherited Frankie's eyes.
“Hmm he’s not doing that crazy thing anymore?”
“What thing?” You frowned.
“Well one time while we were together he stayed up the whole night because he thought some criminal or something was after us.” Laura laughed cruelly. You wanted to slap her for her lack of sympathy. What was funny about Frankie’s fear? “The psychiatrist said there would be delusions but that was just too much.”
“I think I’ve heard enough.” You snipped, trying to keep at least a polite facade. There were people just a few feet away. You prayed the couldn’t hear.
“Hey I’m sorry.” She schooled her features. “Don’t think I’m cruel. It wasn’t easy being with someone like that. I’m trying to look out for you.”
“Thanks for that. I think I'm good though.” You finished picking up the last pool toy and walked away before Laura could say more. You wanted to turn back and say something mean but you were determined to be the bigger person. You didn’t want to start drama that would hurt Frankie and Rosalia. You spent a good minute in the garage after putting the toys back, positively fuming.
“Sweet pea?” Frankie interrupted your thoughts, joining you in the garage. “Aren’t you hungry?”
"I was just cleaning up.” You said though your hands were empty.
“I saw Laura talking to you.” He watched you warily. Fear lapped at him. What did Laura tell you...“Everything okay?”
“She just… a bitch.” You huffed. Your word choice made Frankie burst out laughing. “I’m sorry I know you married her but how? She’s awful and rude and judgmental.”
“I know.” Frankie quieted his laughter, pulling you into his chest. “It wasn’t meant to last.”
“Because she’s a bitch.” You grumbled into his chest making Frankie laugh again. His tummy bounced against yours with his laughter. You loved it. You thought again about what Laura said. How cruel she had been in the face of Frankie’s PTSD. “If she says one more rude thing I may have to smack her.”
“You’re hot when you’re possessive, you know that?” Frankie smiled tickling your sides. “Come on, we should get back before our guests start to notice.”
“Alright.” You agreed, taking his hand and following him out of the garage. You felt Laura’s eyes on you two when you came back to the yard. Frankie got your burger set up for you before doing his. It’s the simple things that got you going; how giving he is. You tried to hide your blush from the onlookers as Frankie asked you ketchup or mustard.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Once everyone went home you and Frankie laid out a blanket in the back so you could watch the fireworks happening on the beach a mile away. He was quiet, at least more than he usually is. You didn’t know what to say to reassure him so again you reverted to touch. You placed your hand on his thigh reassuringly.
“Frankie?” You turned to him. “Do you want to talk about anything?”
“No.” He seemed taken aback by your question.
“Okay.” You moved closer to him until you were tucked into his side.
“You mean about Laura.” Frankie said after a moment. “Just- she didn’t say anything to you to make you upset right? She doesn’t get under my skin anymore. I don’t want her to get under yours.”
“She didn’t get under my skin.” You replied. She said nothing to make you insecure, just make you angry at her is all. “I’m just protective of you, you know. It seems like she was awful to you.”
“It’s fine.” Frankie shrugged.
“No.” You moved to sit on his lap, straddling him. “It’s not. You came back from your deployment probably in need of some comfort and all she gave you was judgment."
“She told you about that night.” Frankie hung his head in humiliation. You didn’t deny it. You didn’t want to upset him but part of you knew he should talk about this. Laura shouldn’t be the only one who holds this memory over his head. “It was my first night back. I just- I swore I heard gunfire. I was freaking out. I was probably acting really scary. I thought they came for me and she-Laura called the cops on me.”
“How could she…” You teared up on behalf of Frankie.
“I ran.” He continued, his voice thick. “I stayed a Will’s and calmed down. That was the end of the marriage.” He rubbed up and down your thighs under your dress. It always comforted him. You tried to think of what to say. His wife, the person who was supposed to love him the most, ostracized him and criminalized him.
Frankie was anticipating you to be afraid of him or push him away, but to his surprised you pulled him into a hug, holding his head against your neck like he was a child. He felt a sob rise in his throat and tears wet his eyes. You were so... kind. It was something he was still learning to accept and realize he deserved .
“You’re right.” You took a breath to relax yourself. “It doesn’t matter what she says. You’re mine now. Not hers.” You kissed Frankie on his nose then kissed his mouth.
“Always, sweet pea.” He rubbed his thumb over the area of your brow that furrowed in residual anger.
“I just wish there were some way…” you chewed your lip. “I have these-“ you pulled his dog tags out from where they hung between your breasts. “Reminds me I’m yours.”
“Maybe I need a necklace too.” Frankie smiled squeezing your thighs. That got you thinking…
“Can I try something?” You asked. Frankie nodded looking amused. You tugged at his shirt pulling it over his head. You never got over how broad he was. His toned arms were flexed holding himself up. You leaned forward planting a wet kiss on Frankie’s neck where it met his shoulder.
“Mmm gonna mark me up?”
You nodded and sucked harder till you were satisfied it would leave a mark. Pulling back you admired the red blooming where your mouth had been. It shouldn’t affect you as much as it did but you loved that he had a physical mark from you. He had scars here and there from cross fire and stab wounds. Some he wouldn’t go into detail. You loved them all but for once you wanted him to have a mark born out of love.
“I’m gonna give you a necklace, daddy.” You murmured tracing the path you would forge, down and around to the other side of his neck. You were gonna make hicks all around his neck like a chain. You leaned back down and planted another mark below and slightly to the right.
“Holy shit.” Frankie groaned, tilting his head back. He felt his cock start to harden under your attention. You slowly made your way across his hot skin until you had seven little wet hickies starting to show through the skin. You traced them with your finger, connecting the dots.
Frankie looked down, watching in fascination. His dog tags were a bittersweet thing, symbolizing his commitment to the military, but you wanted them. You wore them proudly, giving him more closure than 100 hours of therapy. But this... this new chain on his skin represented his belonging to you. “Beautiful, baby girl. Thank you.” He kissed you sucking your bottom lip into his mouth. You pulled away before he could deepen it. You start to lean down again like you were going to plant another hickie on him. He pushed you back and rolled the both of you over.
“Daddy! I wasn’t done yet.” You wiggled against the soft blanket.
“No it’s daddy’s turn now.” He pushed the straps of your dress down your arms, tugging your neckline down.
“But I already have a necklace.” You felt Frankie’s dog tags lying in your cleavage.
“Now you’ll have two. I spoil my girl like that.” Frankie teased. He kissed up and down your neck before settling on his starting place. When he started sucking it sent a lightning bolt straight to your clit. You gasped. You could feel him hard against your thigh, not fully yet. You rocked your hips impatiently, clutching his head against you.
“Be patient, baby.” He warned, pausing his work. You stilled your hips with a pout. “Good girl.” He resumed. You wanted to be naughty but you knew you’d never win that fight. Problem was you were loving his attention on your neck so much you couldn’t help but start grinding against his leg again. Your hand reached down and tried to stroke his hardening cock. Frankie pulled back, his lips swollen from giving you hickies. He was only halfway around your chest now.
“You’re being naughty…” Frankie chided, lightly slapping your hand away from him. You continued squirming under his gaze though you at least look apologetic. Frankie pulled away. “You don’t want your necklace?” Frankie pretended to be hurt.
“I’m sorry, Daddy.” You turned on the puppy dog eyes. “Just- your mouth feels so good.”
“If you’re not gonna behave I’m gonna have to make you behave.” Frankie’s mouth curled into a smirk. Your stomach flipped around in excitement. “Sit back up on your knees.” He ordered. You eagerly sat up on your knees, placing your hands on your thighs. Your dress hung around your waist. Frankie stood up and started undoing his belt. You got excited thinking he was going to let you suck his cock but instead he just pulled his belt from his pants and knelt down again. “Remember just say stop if you want to stop.” Frankie reminds you.
You nodded your eyes dilating, staring at the leather in his hands.
“Hands behind your back, baby.” He instructed. You obeyed your knees widening subconsciously. He tied his belt around your wrists. It’s not tight enough to hurt but you certainly could not move your hands without really trying. Frankie licked his lips, staring down at your vulnerable position. “Good little sweet pea.” He cooed. “Now you won’t be able to be naughty. What do you say?”
“Thank you, daddy.” You whispered feeling your cheeks burn at the depravity of your position. The smooth leather of his belt rubbed against your pulse point and Frankie’s smell filled your nose. You’re out in the open. Sure there was a fence but it still heightened your arousal. You were dripping you were sure of it. He knelt before you again to finish his hickies. He held your hair pulling it back to give himself more room.
You tried to lift up your arms multiple times but got stopped by the belt. You whined as he sucked another mark into you and you couldn’t get any stimulation in this position. Frankie let you moan and whine for him but he didn’t stop his mission. He finally pulled back, his hooded eyes evaluated at his work.
“Look at it, baby.”
You looked down at the curved line of hickies running from collarbone to collarbone. “Thank you, daddy, for my necklace. I love it so much.” You looked at his chest. You were matching now. Your lust was momentarily paused as a fresh wave of adoration washed over you. It was so much deeper than sex. Frankie noticed your change in expression and kissed you softly, bringing you back to the moment.
“You sat still for me so good. Now you can ask for what you want.” He strokes your hair softly.
“I wanna-I wanna suck you cock please?”
“Are you sure?” Frankie smiled. “You don’t want my mouth on you or-"
“No.” You shook your head. The emotions swirling in you from lust to love made you hungry for one thing. “I wanna make you cum in my mouth.”
“Fuck.” He groaned before kissing you hard, licking into your mouth. He never had someone as giving and kind and protective of him as you. He could have cried but there was no need because you were his forever. No yearning just living. He reached around to pull off the belt but you stopped him with a small voice.
“Leave it on.”
“Jesus fucking christ.” Frankie stood quickly. You sat up further, your hands still restrained behind your back. Your head was tilted up at him, your dress bunched around your waist, it was the most beautiful fucking sight.
Red blue and white fireworks dazzled the sky above. He picked you up bridal style and carried you inside as quickly as he could while you giggled in delight.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Things started clicking into place like you were growing along some metaphorical ladder. You were finally where you needed to be. You got a job working at the VA in Miami, running their re-entry program. A small publishing house in Miami loved your book and agreed to publish it for a short run. Frankie took some money out of the Colombia account to cover the rest of the contract. Frankie had the book for sale at the shop pushing it on anyone who would enter. He was so proud of you. And that was all that mattered to you.
Frankie unironically planted sweet pea in the garden, telling you how they are slow to grow, but their delicate flower and sweet smell is worth the wait; just like you. Sweet peas were climbers, with the right support, they would bend to any shape. You knew you could go as high as the sky with Frankie by your side.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Taglist: @floraandfrost @agingerindenial, @heythere-mel, @icanbeyourjedi, @linnie0119, @pedrosmustache, @thisshipwillsail316, @peterhollandkait, @leias-rebelion, @phoenix-of-loki, @prettypedros, @kennedywxlsh, @punkerthanpascal, @the-witty-pen-name, @twentyfirstcenturyfox, @madslorian, @sarahjkl82-blog, @bison-writes, @lightning-fast54, @maievdenoir, @nicolethered, @kenoobiwan, @danniburgh, @janebby, @dihra-vesa, @yespolkadotkitty, @ilikechocolatemilkh, @headinthestarz, @tanyaherondale, @christina-loves, @dobbyjen, @fangirl-316
#frankie morales#frankie catfish morales#frankie morales x reader#frankie morales x you#pedro pascal#frankie morales fanfiction#pedro pascal fanfiction#triple frontier#triple frontier fanfiction#pedro pascal x reader#pedro pascal x you#calling home series#daddy!frankie
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For zoom interrupted could we have one where aelin is attending a meeting and Rowan is supposed to take care of Elspeth and well hell ensures
Well, I don’t know where this came from. But it’s here and it’s fluffy, so enjoy.
Zoom Interrupted
~~~~~
It was Rowan’s turn for ‘keeping the toddler out of the study’ today. Aelin had a meeting and they weren’t as accepting of interruptions as his colleagues were. Dorian didn’t mind, neither did Aedion, but a lot of the others had sticks up their asses and didn’t understand kids at all. At least with Dorian as her directing manager, Aelin wasn’t going to cop any flack for it if something happened. He just listened to the complaints, reminded those complaining of the situations they were in, and left it at that.
The only problem was that Elspeth had woken up today feeling like Aelin was the only person that existed in the whole entire world. She wouldn’t have a bar of him. Rowan had tried everything –– snacks, her favourite toys, cuddles, video chatting the grandparents. Nothing worked. The best he could manage was cartoons and being regulated to the opposite of the couch after she had pulled just about every possession she had into the living room and left it there. Even then she was still restless and whiny, every so often she whimpered a little. It was enough to break his heart.
Rowan was checking his phone ignoring the annoyingly high voices on the TV, when there was a loud clatter making him snap his eyes away from the screen. The remote had landed on the floor, the batteries spilling out.
“Elsie,” Rowan said sternly.
It was a mistake. Her green eyes went wide and started to fill with tears. Rowan sighed, he knew what was coming so he slipped off the couch to deal with the remote before it did. He’d just got the batteries in and the back on when Elsie cracked it, crying like her world was ending when all he’d done was say her name in a slightly lower octave than he usually used. Kneeling on the ground Rowan looked over at his daughter, who was now lying down on the couch, her little face heartbreakingly sad.
“I’m sorry, little one,” Rowan said gently. “But you can't throw the remote, it will––”
She didn’t let him finish.
Rowan sighed again, knowing this was a losing fight. “Do you––” more crying, “I can get you a chocolate milk, how about that?”
That caught his daughter’s attention and her crying stopped as she nodded at him. Rowan smiled triumphantly and pushed himself off the floor to go to the kitchen. He got out Elsie’s favourite sippy cup and the milk and the chocolate powder. Spooning in just enough that the milk was convincingly brown, Rowan screwed on the lid and went back to the living room.
“Elsie, here’s your…” Rowan’s voice trailed off when he took in the oddly quiet couch.
Elspeth was gone.
~~~~~
Aelin loved babies. And she loved making babies. It was just the in between bits she wasn’t too fond of. If the vomiting and near constant nausea, along with the fatigue, wasn’t bad enough there was also the fact she was shut in their little house with nowhere to go. Aelin understood why she couldn’t go out, she really did. But being stuck inside with a toddler and her husband with no one else to see face to face was driving her a little stir crazy.
At least today she had something to break up the monotony of the days. She had a meeting for work, meaning that she had to at least look somewhat presentable, giving her something to do and a reason to wash her hair. The hard part had been convincing Elspeth to play with her father for a while. She’d been extra clingy today and Aelin had to literally pry off the little hand that held her shirt in a vice grip. Throughout the meeting she’d heard muffled sounds of tantrums and Rowan’s efforts to placate their daughter, all in all it didn’t sound like it was going great.
And neither was Aelin. She’d zoned out a little while ago while Kaltain droned on about something that wasn’t relevant to Aelin so she put all her attention to keeping her breakfast in her stomach.
Then there was a silence and Aelin hoped that the meeting was over but then her name was being said, and from the tone of it, it wasn’t the first time.
“Aelin,” Dorian said.
She took in a deep breath, not quite exhaling as she said, “Yep.”
“Have you finished that manuscript?”
“Not yet,” Aelin managed to get out, swallowing back the nausea. It usually took Aelin no more than three days to finish a manuscript with her notes for the publishers. But she was more than a week behind on this one. It wasn’t her fault, every time she tried to read she just fell asleep.
“It was meant to be finished last Friday. I don’t think you’ve ever been late before,” Dorian mused.
Aedion snorts from his little rectangle. “Being late is kind of Aelin’s thing at the moment.”
Aelin sends her cousin a scathing look while Dorian looks confused.
“Well that’s it for today,” Dorian said. “Same time next week.”
“Before you go,” Aelin adds quickly before the call ends. “I need a minute with you Dorian.”
“Okay, I’ll just disconnect everyone else.” It took Dorian a minute but then it was just the two of them. “What’s up?”
Just then the door to the study swung open and then a small figure launched itself at Aelin. She gagged on impact, but managed to keep from actually throwing up.
“Elsie!” Dorian cheered. “How’s my favourite little gremlin?”
Aelin saw her daughter give Dorian a look on the screen that looked all too much like Rowan as she clung tighter to Aelin.
“Aw, what’s the matter, petal? Do you want to see the puppies?” Dorian asked.
Elsie nodded at that, wiping her nose on Aelin’s shoulder. Dorian’s dog had had puppies a few weeks ago, Aelin was a little jealous and had cried over the photos more than once. Dorian apparently had one on his lap and he lifted it up so they could see. Aelin’s eyes started to tear up immediately and the fluffy little things. It was enough to get Elsie’s attention and she moved forward, nearly knocking over a drink bottle, making Aelin jump up to catch it before it did some damage.
“Aelin Galathynius-Whitethorn, is that what I think it is?”
Aelin looked at her own screen, at the view Dorian had. The shirt she had worn today hugged her very small baby bump, all the more noticeable from the sideways angle she was standing at. Aelin readjusted Elsie who was currently tucked under her arm, and sat back down. “Yeah so… I’m going to have to put in for leave. I’m pregnant.”
“Again?” Dorian all but blurted.
“Hey,” Aelin pointed a finger at him, feeling irrationally angry. “What do you mean again? It’s only the second one.”
“Sorry,” Dorian said meekly.
“Well, you say it like it’s my fourth or something.” For some reason this conversation was now making her cry. Damned hormones.
“Did you just make my pregnant wife cry?”
Rowan now came into the study, no doubt looking for his escaped charge. He was scowling at Dorian, green eyes staring him down through the camera.
Dorian cleared his throat. “If we weren’t in lockdown I might be afraid for my life right now.”
“Lockdown won’t last forever,” Rowan threatened. “And I never forget.”
“Unless it’s contraceptives,” Dorian muttered.
That set Aelin cackling, her erratic emotions coming full circle, especially when she saw the faint blush on Rowan’s cheeks. Elsie started laughing too, cheered up by being in her mother’s arms and the little puppy.
Dorian sighed. “I hate to lose my best proofreader, again,” he added with a wry smile. “But congratulations. To all of you.”
“Thanks, Dor,” Aelin said, giving Rowan a nudge.
“Thanks,” Rowan said tightly, making Aelin roll her eyes.
“Okay, I’m gonna go before Rowan finds a way to murder me through a screen, we can work out deatils later.” That was all Dorian said before he ended the call.
“You’re the worst,” Aelin said, looking up at her husband.
Rowan sighed, “Sorry, I’m just tired.”
“How convenient, me too,” Aelin said. “How about we take a family nap?”
Rowan grinned at her as he helped her up from the chair while Elsie still clung to her. “Sounds perfect.”
~~~~~
Tags: @fucking-winchester-trash // @literary-licorice // @galyxsy // @tangledraysofsunshine // @highqueenofelfhame // @3am-reading // @soup-that-is-too-hawt // @aelinfire-bringer // @nalgenewhore // @highladyofthesith // @http-itsrebecca // @sleep-and-books // @alifletcher2012 // @westofmoon // @sleeping-and-books // @ttakeitbacknoww // @armixers-unite // @mariamuses // @chocolate-eating-bitch-queen // @velarian-trash // @queenofxhearts // @heroesofterrasen // @highladyofstoriesandmusic // @empire-of-wildfire // @camerooonchiu // @crackedship // @lowhangingtreebranches // @over300books // @yourwhisperingshadows // @thesirenwashere // @tswaney17 // @impossiblescissorspeachpaper // @cat5313 // @judelovescardan // @flowerspringsea // @chaoticskyy // @the-regal-warrior // @fanfictrash3000 // @blueeyes425 // @starseternalnighttriumphant // @bamchickawowow // @thehuntressofmoon // @giorgia-the-trashpanda // @flora-and-fae // @thereaderandfangirl // @illyrian-bookworm // @chemicha // @meltalgel // @gay-book-nerd // @that-odd-puzzle-piece // @i-love-all-books // @in-love-with-caramel-macchiato // @girl-who-reads-the-books // @hizqueen4life // @the-third-me // @1islessthan3books // @bestmelle // @cursebreaker29 // @b00kworm // @superspiritfestival // @aesthetics-11 // @maastrash // @mynewdreamwasyou // @the-last-apprentice // @charincharge // @firestarsandseneschals // @scarznstars // @absolute-dissapointment // @thesurielships // @df3ndyr // @trinitybailey2003 // @hellasblessed // @booknerdproblems // @larisssss // @sevenfreckles-for-sevenloves // @rolltide7 // @scandinavianromantic // @tillyrubes10 // @starwarsslytherin // @minaidss // @paytin77 // @jesstargaryenqueen // @anntheintrovert // @starbornvalkyrie // @loudphantomdragon // @woollycat22 // @claralady // @perseusannabeth // @fangirlprincess09 // @maddymelv // @sierrareads // @more-espresso-less-depresso-xx // @jlinez // @lysandra-ghost-leopard // @rowaelinismyotp // @pullnpeeltwizzlers // @anne-reads // @jadeaffliction // @gracie-rose // @elriel4life // @miserablesmusings // @tothestarswholistentodreamers // @thenerdandfandoms // @castielspelvis // @swankii-art-teacher // @grandma-noob-lord // @vanzetanze // @highlady-brittney // @story-scribbler // @linguine-panini // @pastasiren // @surielandiareendgame // @silentquartz // @littleboxofthunder // @empress-ofbloodshed // @booksbqueen // @rowanwhitethornisbae // @charlizeed // @feysand-loml // @aelin-queen-of-terrasen // @alyx801 // @amandaswallowtail // @louiseleblancdiggory // @abookishfreak // @danibutterr // @thegreyj // @lizzyfirebringer // @endlessdaydream // @magnifique1807
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ASMR - Chapter 6
Elriel fanfiction
About this fic:
Azriel can’t sleep Elain has an ASMR channel Match made in heaven (or you know, on youtube..)
_______________________________________
You can find chapter 1 here, chapter 2 here, chapter 3 here, chapter 4 here and chapter 5 here.
Read this fic on AO3
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When Friday was just around the corner, Azriel was a nervous mess.
He had cleaned his apartment twice, which he understood was a weird thing to do since she wasn’t even coming to his house. He had tried on every item of clothing in his wardrobe. He had googled ‘conversation topics first date’ and written a few down on his phone. He had even gotten a haircut.
He hadn’t been able to sleep at all that week. It felt weird to look at her videos when he had met her and talked to her. It felt like an invasion of privacy, even though it wasn’t. The videos were on the internet for everyone to see, yet Azriel couldn’t bring himself to watch her videos. So he didn’t sleep.
The day before the date, Azriel had decided to get her flowers. But when he stood in a flower shop and the person behind the register asked what kind of flowers he wanted, he just walked out of there. He had no idea what kind of flowers to give to a florist. He knew that certain flowers had certain meanings, and even though he had no idea what any flower meant, a florist probably knew. What if he bought flowers that said ‘I hate you’ or ‘happy funeral’?
Azriel couldn’t risk it, so he bought some chocolate instead. All women like chocolate, right?
But when he came home, his mind did that thing it always did when he was sleep-deprived: it questioned his every decision. What if Elain is lactose intolerant? What if she’s vegan? What if she is the only person on planet earth who hates chocolate? What if the different flavors of chocolate have meaning, just like flowers? Maybe you bought some sort of ‘happy funeral-chocolate’?
In an attempt to get these intrusive thoughts out of his mind, he went to the gym. He worked out for two hours, which was a bit excessive. The gym played shitty gym-music and every single person made weird sounds. It was the perfect distraction. For now.
Azriel hoped that his workout would help with his insomnia, too. He hoped that if he lifted enough weights and ran a few more miles than usual, perhaps he would be able to sleep. It had never worked before, but, as his mother used to say; “hope is the last thing that leaves you.”
However, after tossing and turning for three hours, he could safely say that the workout had done nothing to help him sleep. He couldn’t understand how a person could be so fucking tired, but still unable to sleep. He was almost going a bit crazy at this point. For the past weeks, Azriel had gotten used to falling asleep to Flower Girl ASMR’s videos. He had gotten used to her sweet voice rocking him to sleep. The insomnia was almost worse now that he knew how good it felt to have a decent night’s sleep.
Azriel looked at his phone. It was almost 02.30 in the morning. Fuck, he muttered to himself. He really didn’t want to be a tired mess on the date tomorrow. He had to put his best foot forward, and he knew he couldn’t do that if he hadn’t slept well for almost a week.
Maybe he should just watch one of her videos? She would obviously never know.
After debating with himself for a few minutes, he decided that Elain deserved to meet a well-rested Azriel, so he opened the YouTube app and found her latest video.
Azriel held his breath as her face filled his screen. God, she was lovely. Her smile could light up the darkest of nights, and her sweet voice was like a calming balm for his soul.
He put the phone in his chest and just listened. Slowly and gently, her whispers lulled him to sleep.
Azriel woke up relaxed, but nervous. He only had a half-day at work because Rhys had decided to send everyone home early today to celebrate that Feyre was pregnant. He was taking her on a spa weekend. She was only a few weeks pregnant, but Azriel knew that she would be the most pampered woman in the world during this pregnancy. This weekend was just the beginning. If she suddenly got a craving for pickle smoothies with whipped cream and sprinkles, Rhys would 100% make her one every day. And that is saying something since this man almost threw up every time someone opened a pickle jar in his vicinity.
“Any cool plans tonight, Az?” Cassian asked as he started to pack up his belongings.
Azriel wanted to tell him about the date. He wanted to share the nervousness with someone - anyone. But he couldn’t. Cass knew who she was. Nesta had known her since college. If this didn’t go well, Azriel would never hear the end of it. So he lied.
“No, nothing special. You?”
“I was going to take Nesta out for a date to celebrate that it has been four years since she agreed to go on a date with me…”
Azriel laughed. “After you had panted after her for like two years you mean?”
“Exactly!” He smiled. Cassian sure seemed like a big brute the first time you met him, but he was actually a soft teddy bear. He was never ashamed when people mentioned that he had been trying to win Nesta over for years before she agreed to date him. He just felt like he had won a prize. It was very sweet.
“However,” he continued. “She has to work late. Apparently, one of her authors had plagiarized fanfiction, which Nesta found out about like a week before the book went to print. So obviously, Nesta is livid and I do not want to be close to her until this is resolved.”
Nesta owned a publishing company that focused on publishing romance novels, which didn’t surprise anyone. Nesta had always loved romance books. In her words; the smuttier, the better. Azriel always found them a bit cringy. It was like reading porn. But truth be told, he had read a few books that Nesta had recommended, and they had taught him a thing or two.
“What the hell is fanfiction?” he asked Cassian.
Cassian shrugged. “I’m not completely sure, but apparently this author had just copied something from the internet and changed the names of the characters and sent it in as a manuscript.”
“Weird. I understand that Nesta is pissed.”
“Yeah. So, you wanna do something? Take out and a game?”
“No, I can’t,” Azriel lied.
“You just said that you didn’t have any plans.”
Fuck.
“Yeah, well. I said that I didn’t have any special plans, not that I didn’t have any plans.”
Implying that his date with Elain was “not special” made him feel like shit.
Cassian eyed him suspiciously. “You’re going on a date.”
“What? no.”
Cassian laughed and slapped Azriel’s back. “Yes, you are. You have that date-look all over your face.”
“What the hell is a date-look?” he asked, but Cassian didn’t answer.
“Who are you going out with? Do I know her? Is she hot?”
Azriel held up a hand to stop the onslaught of questions. “You don’t know her,” he lied.
Cassian grinned. “So, you are going on a date?”
“You just said that I had a date-face?”
“Yeah, that was a lucky guess. So, what’s her name?”
“None of your business, Cass.”
“Wow, what a beautiful name,” Cassian teased. “But I get it. You like being secretive. Can you at least tell me how you met?”
“The internet.”
Cassian let out a fake gasp. “Stop the presses and hold your horses. Azriel downloaded a dating app? Can pigs fly now, too?” He made a point of looking out the window.
“Ha-ha, very funny.” Azriel slung his bag over his shoulder and started walking towards the elevator. Cassian was just behind him.
“So, can I see a photo?”
“No.”
“What if you’re getting catfished?”
“I’m not.”
“Well, you can never be sure. One time, this girl, or actually, it was an old man…”
“Cass, please. Just let it go,” Azriel interrupted. “There’s a reason why I never tell you guys when I go on dates.”
“Dates? You’ve been going on multiple dates without telling me? I’m wounded, Azriel.”
Azriel rolled his eyes and stepped into the elevator. When the elevator reached the ground floor, Azriel got out. Cassian had his car in the underground parking garage. Just before the doors closed, Cassian called out for Azriel. “You might need this.” He threw something at Azriel, and Azriel didn’t see what it was until he caught it.
It was a condom.
With a grin, Cassian disappeared behind the big, metal elevator doors.
Azriel shook his head and looked down at the small foil packet in his hand. Cassian really was the worst.
A few hours later, Azriel was almost ready to leave for the date. He was wearing black trousers and a dark grey knitted sweater. And blue socks. Cobalt blue, to be exact. Azriel had a thing about colorful socks. He mostly dressed in black, but he didn’t own a single pair of black socks. These blue socks were his favorites, though. He loved cobalt blue.
Azriel was checking the route to the bar when an incoming phone call made his phone vibrate (he had put his phone on mute and deleted Barbie Girl from his phone, thank god!).
It was Elain calling.
Azriel felt his heart drop. Nobody called just before a date unless they wanted to cancel.
With a sigh, he answered the phone. He tried to sound cheery. “Hello, Elain.”
“Azriel! I’m so happy you picked up.” She sounded out of breath.
“Anything wrong?” Azriel asked.
“Well. Kind of… have you left your apartment yet?”
“No, not yet. Why?”
There was a short pause, and Azriel could have sworn that he heard her swear under her breath.
“Well, I won’t be able to make it. I’m so sorry. And I’m so sorry for calling this late. I was really looking forward to our date, I promise.” She really did sound apologetic.
“Has anything happened?” Azriel asked, suddenly a bit worried.
“No… Or actually, yes. I fell when I got out of the shower earlier. I thought that I just needed to rest, but I can’t walk,” she let out a pained laugh. “I’m such a clutz.”
Azriel hated that she was trying to make light of the situation. He hated that she was hurt. “Elain. If you can’t walk, you should probably go to the ER,” Azriel said.
“Oh, no. I called my neighbor. Madja. She’s a doctor. She said that I had just sprained my ankle.”
“Okay…” Azriel didn’t know what else to say.
“Can we reschedule?” Elain asked. “I really wanted to see you tonight.”
Azriel was used to being rejected. He was used to not trusting new people. But somehow, he trusted Elain when she said that she wanted to see him.
“Of course we can reschedule. I was really looking forward to meeting you too.”
“Really?” He could hear the smile in her voice. It made him smile.
“Yes. I’m av…”
Azriel was interrupted by a hiss from Elain.
“Are you okay?” he asked, ready to steal a car, drive over her to her place, and get her to the hospital. Maybe it was a good thing that he didn’t know her address.
“Mhm, I’m fine. I just.. moved.”
“Elain. Do you have a friend or family member coming over to help you?”
There was a stretch of silence. “No, I’m fine. I don’t need help.” Her tone was too positive and cheery. Azriel didn’t believe her one bit.
“Have you had dinner?”
“I was planning on making some instant ramen.”
Azriel frowned. “And how are you going to do that when you can barely move? Also, that’s not good enough for dinner.”
She didn’t answer for a while. “I’m fine. I promise.” He could hear her voice break on the last syllable. She was not fine.
“Elain. Please, will you let me get you some food? I don’t have to come in if you don’t want me to. Just, let me get you something to eat.”
“You don’t have to…”
“I want to. If you’re willing to give me your address, I’ll be there in just a bit.”
She hesitated. “You probably have something better to do.”
“I don’t. Now please, let me get you some food.”
He didn’t just want to get her some food. He wanted to make sure that she was alright. He didn’t want her to sit all alone in her apartment when she couldn’t walk.
He wanted to take care of her.
After a small eternity, he could hear her whisper “Okay.”
45 minutes later, he was outside her building with sushi (she had said that she liked it) and a bag full of snacks. He didn’t know what she liked, so he had bought a little bit of everything.
A short, old lady walked out the door, and Azriel caught it with one hand. He didn’t want to call her and make her come to the door right now, so he snuck in.
Elain had told him that she lived on the sixth floor, so he quickly made his way up the stairs. He couldn’t risk being caught in an elevator right now.
He found the door with her name on it and raised his hand to knock. And then he froze.
What am I doing? he thought to himself. He had basically asked her for her address and then invited himself to bring her food. He knew that she had a bad history when it came to men. What if she just didn’t want to say no because she thought that it would hurt his feelings?
Azriel contemplated leaving the food outside the door and text her when he was a safe distance away.
“Azriel, is that you?” someone called from the apartment. Elain.
Azriel had to swallow the lump in his throat. “Yes,” he called back. “Do you want me to leave the food outside the door?”
“No, come in. The door is open.”
With a deep breath, Azriel gathered his courage and reached for the doorknob.
He walked into a small hallway that opened up to a quaint kitchen. Elain was nowhere in sight. The kitchen was bright and welcoming. The walls were painted light green and the cabinets were white. Azriel could see a few cookbooks on her windowsill, which made him smile. Most people didn’t own cookbooks nowadays - they just found recipes online.
“In here,” Elain called. Azriel made his way through the kitchen and into the living room. His first thought was that the room really seemed to fit Elain. The dark wooden floor was a nice contrast to the white walls. Not that you saw much of the walls since they were covered by a built-in bookshelf and a gallery wall full of botanical prints. And there were plants in every nook and cranny. There was a dark green velvet couch in the middle of the room, and on it sat Elain. Or actually, she was half-seated, half laying down. Her foot was propped up with a few pillows. There was a coffee mug on the table in front of her, and beside the couch, he could see a worn leather chair.
Elain was smiling at him as he entered the room. When he smiled back, she put the back of her hand against her forehead, which made her look like a damsel in distress from one of those old Hollywood movies. “You came for me,” she exclaimed in an awful fake southern accent. “My hero!”
Azriel couldn’t help but laugh. Elain was wearing black leggings and an oversized shirt. Her hair was gathered into a ponytail. She was beautiful, Azriel thought to himself as he sat down in the leather chair, giving her all the space she needed on the couch.
“How are you feeling?”
“Oh, I’m fine. Madja said that it seems to be a mild ankle sprain, and I should be up and running in like one to two weeks. Honestly, I feel more stupid than anything else.”
“Why?” Azriel asked.
“Well, I didn’t want to cancel our date. And who falls out of the shower? I really am the clumsiest person in Velaris,” she joked. “Yesterday, I dropped a full cup of coffee over my new, white shirt. And the day before that, I poked my friend Nuala in the eye with a flower.”
“You… poked her in the eye with a flower?”
Elain laughed. “Yes. Her eye was red for hours.”
Their eyes met for a brief moment, and Azriel thought that he could drown in those eyes. He wanted her to look at him forever.
But he didn’t want to intrude. “Do you want me to leave? I could just leave the food here with you.”
Elain bit her inner cheek, suddenly looking very nervous. “Would you...Didn’t you buy food for yourself?”
“I did. But I don’t have to eat with you if you want to be alone.”
“I…” she took a deep breath. “I don’t want to be alone.” It was barely a whisper.
“So, you want me to stay?”
Elain nodded, a lovely pink color spreading across her cheeks.
“Okay.” Azriel unpacked the sushi from the bag and offered her a choice of drinks. “We have lemon, elderflower, and regular coke. I didn’t know what you preferred.”
“Elderflower, please.”
She was still blushing. Azriel couldn’t tell if she was uncomfortable or just nervous.
Azriel handed her the drink and opened the coke for himself.
Elain sat up slowly and reached for her chopsticks. Since she had to sit with her leg raised, she couldn’t exactly lean over the coffee table, so Azriel placed the sushi on a pillow in her lap.
“Thank you,” she said and put a few pillows behind her back. From where he sat, he could only see the back of Elain’s head now. He wanted to move the chair so he could look at her, but he didn’t want to come off as creepy.
And he was actually quite happy that they couldn’t see each other when she took a bite of her food and let out a sigh. It was just a sigh, but somehow it was the most erotic sound Azriel had ever heard. He blushed and made a point of looking at his food.
“God, this is so good, Azriel. Thank you. I was really hungry.”
“When was the last time you ate?”
“Lunch,” she said under her breath and took another bite of sushi. Azriel looked at his watch. She hadn’t eaten in more than seven hours. And she was going to make instant ramen if he hadn’t shown up. Suddenly, he felt a bit better about the situation.
When Azriel looked up from his food, Elain was looking at him over her shoulder.
“Is this weird?” she asked. “Is it weird that I asked you to stay? I know it isn’t fun…”
“I kind of remember that I was the one who asked for your address, and then showed up at your doorstep with food. I promise that I wouldn't have done that if I didn’t want to. If anything, I’m weird for showing up like this.”
She laughed, but it was a sad laugh. “No, you’re not weird. You’re kind. I’m just not used to this.”
Azriel frowned. “Not used to what? Kindness?”
Elain looked away, but Azriel didn’t miss the slight nod. “My ex never came over when I was sick. He said that I was boring and that he had better things to do…”
Azriel felt his hands curl into fists. “Is this the same ex that cheated on you and now leaves hate on your videos?” he gritted out.
Another nod. “Yes. But there has been almost no hate since you helped me block those words.” She smiled at him, and he could tell that she wanted to change the subject.
“That’s good to hear.”
Azriel wanted nothing more than to ask where this asshole lived so he could go and kick his ass, but he tried to act civil for Elain’s sake.
“I’m sorry for talking about him,” she said. “You should never talk about exes on dates and…” Her eyes grew wide when she realized what she said. “Not that this is a date or anything,” she corrected herself. “I mean, it would be a pretty shitty date.”
She was flustered, and Azriel couldn’t hide the big grin on his face. She was so cute.
“Elain. Do you want this to be a date?”
“Do you?”
He knew that she needed to hear him say it. “Yes.”
A shy smile played on her face. “Me too.”
“Then it’s settled. This is our first date,” Azriel declared.
Elain’s smile grew. “So there’s a chance for more dates?”
“Don’t be greedy,” Azriel teased. Elain stuck out her tongue and turned around again, facing her food.
I want to taste that tongue, Azriel thought.
Damn those intrusive thoughts.
“I can’t believe that I’m wearing leggings on our first date.”
Azriel didn’t say anything to that. He could complain about anything that tight.
God, what was wrong with his brain tonight?
“You look so good, and I look like this,” she pointed at her hair. “I had even bought a new dress for tonight.”
This piqued Azriel’s interest. “Really? Tell me what it looks like and I can imagine you in it.”
Or out of it.
Stupid fucking brain.
Elain pointed somewhere behind Azriel. “Well, it’s right there.”
On a door that Azriel assumed led to her bedroom, hung a blue dress.
Cobalt blue.
His favorite color.
He grinned and pulled up one pant leg and showed her his sock “We would have matched.”
Elain let out a heartfelt laugh, which made Azriel all warm inside. He loved seeing her happy. He liked knowing that he was the reason for said happiness.
“I didn’t take you for a man that wears colorful socks,” she said, still laughing. “First Barbie Girl, and now colorful socks. I’m starting to think that there’s more to you than meets the eye.”
“Oh, I’m full of surprises.”
There was a stretch of silence again. It wasn’t uncomfortable though. Even though they didn’t know each other well yet, Azriel could already tell that Elain was one of those people that he just instantly could relax around.
“Elain, this might be a weird request. But can I move this chair so I’m not staring at the back of your head?”
Elain turned around, cheeks pink again. “Yes,” she answered quickly, almost as if she had thought about the same thing.
He picked up the chair and quickly moved it to the other side of the couch. When he met Elain’s gaze, she was staring at him, mouth agape.
“What?”
“You’re strong.”
Azriel scratched his neck and laughed nervously, feeling a bit self-conscious. “Yeah, I work out.”
Wow, what a stupid fucking answer.
But Elain didn’t seem to mind. No, she was looking at him more intently now, and her eyes were not focusing on his face anymore. No, they were most definitely looking at his chest. “I can tell,” she said playfully. This felt very much like flirting,
Azriel wondered what she would think of the tattoos covering his skin underneath the shirt.
Azriel tried to remember the conversation topics he had written down on his phone, and after a few minutes, they were talking as if they had known each other for years. Azriel was surprised that she was so easy to talk to. Most of the time, he struggled with social situations. But with Elain, he felt comfortable. At ease.
“You’re very easy to talk to,” he told Elain. She rewarded him with a smile.
“So are you. It feels like we have known each other forever. I never thought that someone that slid into my DM’s would ever be this nice.”
At those words, Nesta’s face popped into Azriel’s mind. He should tell Elain that he knows Nesta. If it wasn’t for her, he would never have known that Elain lived in Velaris. If it wasn’t for Nesta, he wouldn’t have happened to run past her store that morning.
“I have a confession to make,” he said before he could change his mind.
Elain raised her eyebrows. “Oh? Please don’t tell me you’re trying to get me to join a cult.”
“Has that happened before?”
Elain shrugged. “More often than you think.”
“I’m not trying to get you to join a cult. I just… I wanted to tell you that I think that we have some mutual friends.”
She didn’t look surprised, but she didn’t say anything either, so Azriel continued.
“You know Nesta, right? I think you went to college together…”
Elain nodded.
“Well, she’s getting married to my best friend Cassian. I didn’t know that you knew them when I wrote to you, I promise. But it felt weird pretending like we don’t have people in common when we do. I’m sorry for not telling you earlier. I found out last week when Nesta saw one of your videos on my phone and asked me if I was a stalker.”
Azriel was blushing now. He was expecting silence, or maybe questions. But instead, he was met with laughter.
“She thought you were a stalker?”
Azriel shrugged, unable to find any good words.
“Well, I might also have a confession to make,” Elain announced. “I actually knew that you were friends with Nesta. That’s why I even answered your DM in the first place.”
“What?” Azriel couldn’t find better words than that.
“Yeah, when I scrolled through your Instagram I saw a photo from Rhysand’s and Feyre’s wedding, so I kind of figured out who you were then. Nesta had mentioned you once or twice before, so I knew you weren’t a creep. And then I saw that selfie when you were carrying a lasagna, and you looked so good, so I answered your DM.” Her blush had almost turned a deep red.
Azriel couldn’t help but grin. “You answered because I looked hot? You said that the lasagna looked tasty…”
She bit her lip to keep from laughing. “Want to hear another confession?”
Azriel nodded.
“Well, I kind of understood how to block words from the link you sent me, but I really wanted to talk to you more.”
Azriel’s mouth fell open in pretend shock. “Sneaky girl.”
“I’m sorry for not telling you earlier. I just…”
“No, no. It’s okay,” Azriel interrupted. “Do you want to hear another of my confessions?”
“Yes, please.”
Azriel put his elbows in his knees and leaned forward. He could tell that her eyes went to his biceps. Good.
“Well, when I first saw one of your videos, I thought that you might be the most beautiful woman I have ever seen.”
Elain blushed even more, the color spreading to her chest. Not that Azriel was looking there.
“Really?”
“Yes. And when we talked on the phone, you know, that time when you lied about needing my help,” Azriel winked at her. “I hadn’t laughed that much in ages. I was so bummed because I thought that you lived on the other side of the country or something.”
“But I didn’t.” She smiled.
“You didn’t.” He smiled back.
They spent the entire night in Elain’s living room, just talking. Without even noticing it, a few hours went by. When they finished the sushi, Azriel made a snack buffet on the coffee table, which made Elain laugh.
“We are going to be so sick if we eat all of this.”
“Well, someone told me that she might be bedridden for more than a week, so maybe you could save some for the upcoming days of rest and relaxation.”
“Sounds like a plan,” she said and reached for the popcorn.
They continued flirting for the rest of the evening, but nothing explicit happened. They didn’t touch. Didn’t kiss. They just talked. It was all Azriel could have dreamt of. He had never felt so comfortable so quickly with anyone before. When it was close to midnight, he could tell that Elain was getting tired. After her fifth yawn, Azriel told her that he should probably get going.
She protested and then yawned again.
“Okay, I admit defeat,” she said and stretched. Azriel could see her stomach when her shirt rode up from the motion. It looked so wonderful and soft and…
He didn’t even have time to finish his thought, because Elain was trying to stand up by herself. Trying, and failing miserably.
“Could you help me to the bathroom?” she whispered and nodded to a white door just by the kitchen.
“Of course,” Azriel put his arm around her waist and supported her. She didn’t complain, but he could see the pain on her face. It hurt him to see her like this.
“I’m just gonna brush my teeth. Don’t go just yet.” She closed the door. Azriel leaned against the wall next to the door and dragged his hands through his hair.
He looked around the room, not quite believing that he was here. In Elain’s home.
This date had been even better than he could ever have imagined. He was actually quite happy that they hadn’t gone out, but he obviously didn’t like that the reason for staying home was that she was hurt.
The door opened again, and Elain looked at Azriel with a pale face. She was so obviously in pain. Azriel grabbed her around the waist again and held her up.
“Do you have any painkillers?”
She nodded. “By the bed. Could you help me? Just to the door.”
Azriel started leading the way, but after two steps Elain winced.
Azriel couldn’t take it anymore. “Hold on,” he warned her, and then he picked her up. She gasped and flung her arms around his neck. This was the closest they had ever been. One of his fingers graced the hem of her shirt. He could feel her skin there. He had to take a deep breath. “Is this okay?”
“Mhm,” she breathed, and he walked her to her room. He stopped at the door. It was a cozy bedroom. The walls were painted a dark blue and above her bed hung a giant painting with a floral motif in a gold frame.
“Nice room,” he said. He didn’t put her down. She had said that she only needed help to the door, but he couldn’t see her walking to her bed all by herself,
“Thank you.”
“Do you want me to...” he started, but he was interrupted when Elain said his name.
“Azriel,” she repeated.
He looked at her then, her face just inches from his. He could see every freckle on her skin. He could count every eyelash. His eyes went to her plush lips, and then back to her eyes.
Had she noticed?
She had his attention now.
“Azriel,” she whispered. “Are you going to kiss me?”
Azriel was taken aback. He hadn’t expected that question. He didn’t mind, of course not. he was just surprised. She could probably see that in his eyes, because she quickly tried to smooth over it. “I mean, we don’t have to. I completely understand if you don’t want to, and I..”
Azriel kissed her temple to make her quiet. It worked very well. “You’re hurt.”
“Just my ankle,” Elain pouted. “Also, haven’t you ever heard the saying ‘kiss it better’?”
Azriel rolled his eyes. “I’m pretty sure that it means that you should kiss the place that hurts,” he teased.
“Eh, semantics. I think a kiss on the lips might do wonders.”
Azriel leaned in, almost touching his lips to her. Almost. “Oh, is that what you think?” he teased.
“Mhm,” she breathed.
Azriel stayed like that for a while, his lips just out of reach. He wanted her to beg. He wanted her to go crazy with want. With need.
But that was for another time. Right now, he just needed to kiss her.
Elain was tilting her head to get closer to him. Her mouth was slightly parted and her eyes scanned his before fluttering shut.
Offer and permission.
Azriel leaned in slowly and brushed his lips to hers. It was a feathery light touch. He could feel Elain shiver in his arms, and he held her closer. Tighter. He touched her lips with his again, and he knew he needed more. He tasted her lips once more, his tongue teasing her lower lip. Elain opened up for him, letting him in. She moaned when he deepened the kiss. When he pressed his lips more firmly to hers. When her tongue joined his. They were both panting, unable to stop. Elain’s hands went to Azriel’s hair, gently scraping his scalp while her tongue tangled with his. The sensation made Azriel crazy, and if she hadn’t been injured he would have lowered her to the bed and continued his kisses down her body until she was writhing underneath him, begging for more.
But she was hurt. And it was late.
Unwillingly, Azriel slowed down before breaking the kiss.
“More,” Elain panted and kissed his jaw.
Azriel chuckled. “Don’t be greedy.”
She pouted when he walked over to her bed, and it was the cutest pout Azriel had ever seen. It was so cute in fact, that he had to lean in again and kiss her lower lip. He didn’t know how it happened, but he was suddenly sitting on Elain’s bed with her in his lap. He was still holding her tight, her fingers still in his hair. Their lips were locked in another kiss. This one was even hotter. Even deeper. Azriel thought to himself that he didn’t need air if he could just taste these lips for the rest of his life.
After a small eternity, they did have to break apart though. Turns out the human body needs air. Stupid body.
Elain leaned her forehead against his.
“I should go,” Azriel said, even though every fiber of his being protested that statement.
She nodded. “Okay.” She was still out of breath. So was he.
Elain kissed his forehead, which made him feel oddly safe. “So, can I have a second date?”
Azriel chuckled and nuzzled her neck. She smelled divine. He wanted nothing more than to taste her there; just below her ear.
“You can have as many dates as you want.”
“Good to know.” He could hear the smile in her voice.
After a few minutes of catching their breaths, Azriel helped Elain into bed. He fetched her a glass of water for the painkillers and made sure that all her windows were closed.
He leaned against her doorframe, trying to memorize the sight of her in bed. She looked so cute. So vulnerable.
“Could you lock the door when you leave? My keys are on the kitchen counter. You can just put them in the mailbox.”
“Of course.” Azriel walked into her room again and leaned over her. He kissed the top of her head and caressed her cheek with his thumb. “Sleep well, Elain.”
“You too, Azriel.”
She was already drifting off.
Azriel walked quietly through the apartment and made sure that the door was locked behind him.
Azriel was walking home on clouds that evening.
In his bones, he could feel that this was the start of something wonderful.
When he climbed into bed that night, he saw a new message from Elain. She must have sent it just after he left her place. He opened the message, and there was no text. Just an audio file.
He pressed play and was immediately met with her heavenly voice.
“I thought that this might help you sleep,” Elain whispered, and Azriel could feel tingles up and down his spine. “Thank you for a wonderful date, Azriel.”
And then she repeated his name. For five minutes, she was whispering “Azriel, Azriel, Azriel,” over and over again, and it made Azriel both sleepy and aroused.
It was actually a very pleasant feeling, he thought to himself as he drifted off to sleep.
That night, he dreamt about brown eyes, golden hair, and the sweetest lips he had ever tasted. Azriel had never felt better.
#elriel fanfic#elriel#elain x azriel#elain archeron#azriel x elain#azriel#acotar fanfiction#acotar#dottielovegoodfanfiction
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Girls Need Love Too
Pairing: Miguel Galindo x Reader
Summary: Miguel has to be reminded of what’s most important.
Warnings: NSFW-ish.
A/N: This was an attempted rewrite of ‘Savage’ that took on a life of its own. I may publish a part two later that includes smut, but I wanted to post this before I abandoned it all together.
“You’re going to be the death of me.” Nestor groaned as he took in your appearance.
You looked down at yourself, feigning innocence. “What are you talking about? I’m just wearing a robe?”
The dark material hugged you in all the right places, highlighting your figure and fanning out just above the knee. The sexy silk robe was a poor illusion of modesty but it served its purpose.
Your legs, Miguel’s personal favorite, were on display and sure to grab his attention. To most men legs were just vessels to transport you from one place to another. But Miguel was nothing if not meticulous. Every little detail was an appetizer for the main course. Your legs were a roadmap to the place he always wanted to be, buried deep inside you.
“Exactly.” Nestor rolled his eyes but gestured for you to continue past him to Miguel’s home office anyway.
📲 What time r u coming to bed?
An hour passed with no response so you were forced to take matters into your own hands. Almost a week of late nights and early mornings apart left you aching for your husband. Aching for the moments Miguel woke up in the middle of the night and pulled you closer, hugging you tighter to his chest. Or how he’d always stop whatever he was doing to kiss your forehead or knuckles when you entered a room.
You even missed being taunted by him— the long, lingering touches on your ass in public. He always smirked to let you know he knew what he was doing, getting you worked up. You hated the idea of scandalizing the little old ladies of Santo Padre, but Miguel was already ‘El Diablo’ to them. He got off on it, slowly corrupting you at each turn in hopes he’d prolong your time together, in this life and the next. All that effort to make sure he’d have your company eternally and he couldn’t be bothered to come to bed at a reasonable time.
Men could be dense, and even your brilliant, debonair husband was no exception. You planned to straighten him out though. You knocked but didn’t wait for an invitation to enter. You were done doing things at his pace.
Miguel’s head lifted from his papers and you knew he had been ready to chew whoever came through the door out for disturbing him. Because it was you, his face softened into a tired smile. It almost made you feel bad. Almost.
“Hi, stranger.”
“My love.” He gestured for you to come closer, looking at you with sleepy affection.
“See something you like?” You smiled, making your way across the room.
“Of course. You’re even more beautiful than the day we met.” You sighed, clutching your chest. He never made it easy for you to stay mad at him. The thoughtful words were just what you needed in the moment. “How sweet.” You whispered, meaning it.
“It’s only the truth.” Miguel reached for you, pulling until you stood in front of him. Your arms folded across your chest as you resisted his attempt to pull you into his lap.
“Is it?” You stroked the silky crown of his head. “Because as of late, your actions say something different.”
“You’re serious?” Miguel’s eyes roamed your face and he found you were in fact serious. “I’ve been busy, I know, but you’re my world.” He spoke softly, gently stroking the back of your thighs where the robe stopped.
“I’ve barely seen you. I fell asleep and woke up in an empty bed too many days.” You pouted, hating how needy he made you.
“Come here, cariña.”
You allowed him to pull you down into his lap, but didn’t wrap your arms around his neck the way you normally did. “Come on. Don’t be like that.” He pleaded when you didn’t lean in for a kiss.
“You’re not going to kiss me?” He poked at your sides as you shrugged and played coy. You didn’t do a good job of it, a smile tugging at the corners of your lips.
When in doubt, he returned to what he knew. With a sure, even tone, he said,“Who am I kidding? Of course you are.”
You whipped around to face him then, your face scrunching comically. “Am I now?” He nodded as if it was a matter of fact. You scoffed and rolled your eyes. His arms tightened around your waist so you couldn’t get up.
“Want to know why you're going to kiss me?” He moved a stray curl away from your face, wearing a boyish grin that was hard to not fall for. No matter how hard you tried, you never could steel yourself against his charms. You both knew it, but why make it easy for him?
“Do you wanna know why I’m not going to kiss you?” Miguel’s smile never wavered. He leaned forward until your lips were only a breath apart. “You’re going to kiss me because if you don’t…” He was so close that it would be easy to steal the kiss, but that wasn’t Miguel’s style. He wanted to win, but not by default. “…I’m going to tickle you.”
“What?” You giggled, surprised at the silly threat. “You need sleep, baby. Besides, I’m not ticklish.” You lied, refusing to show him any weakness. If you gave an inch, he’d take a mile and you’d be putty in his hands.
He admired your efforts. “You’re not? Are you sure?” There was an edge to his tone that made you tense up, but it was nothing. He attacked your sides, tickling until you were a hysterical, teary-eyed folded up mess in his lap.
“Stop!” You gasped, breathless as you pushed his hands away. Miguel relented, caging you to his chest in a bear hug as he settled back into the cushiony office chair. Yes, he was definitely sleep deprived.
“Still mad at me?” The yawn that followed was quite possibly the cutest thing the cartel boss had done. Very few people got to see the vulnerable side of Miguel. You didn’t even get that side of him all of the time.
“I don’t know. It depends on you.” You scratched his facial hair affectionately. “What time are you coming to bed?”
Miguel laughed. Even he knew when to take an out. “Right now.”
“Good answer, baby.” You wrapped your arms around his neck, squeezing with a groan. He nuzzled into your neck until you pulled away and gave him a quick kiss on the lips.
True to his word, he accepted your hand and followed you up the stairs, watching your barely clothed frame with interest despite his fatigue. Had you always been that shapely?
Once the door was shut and locked behind you, he leaned down to whisper in your ear. “Since you mentioned me missing last week, would you be kind enough to help me get caught up?”
You playfully rolled your eyes despite the excitement bubbling up in your chest. “Ugh, I guess I’m feeling nice. I can give you a little recap.”
“Yeah?” He leaned forward to kiss you and this time you let him, your lips moving together in a familiar rhythm. Bliss was written all over his face when you broke apart. Whether it was the swirl of love and lust, or regular old sleep deprivation, you weren’t sure.
“My sweet girl.” He praised, holding you to him possessively. You beamed at the endearment. Something about being told you were sweet made you want to be. For him.
Dark skin hid your blush, but your sudden shyness was apparent with your inability to meet his eyes. Instead, you pushed him back a few steps and undid the silk ties of your robe. “Just try to remember all of this the next time you decide to hole yourself up in that office.”
The light-weight silk material fell to the floor with little resistance, leaving you standing before him in a simple but sexy lingerie set. “It’s warmer and there’s more cushion in here.” You teased, loving the awestruck grin on his face.
“All true.” He confirmed as his hands roamed your body, cupping your ass in his hands. He hummed into your neck, enjoying the closeness for a moment.
Finding balance between work and home life was a struggle for Miguel. He dealt with situations that were quite often literally life or death. That just meant you had to work a little bit harder at being his escape from the darkness, and oasis from the harsh realities of the world.
He sighed and cupped your face in his palms. “I could never forget you.” The look in his eyes alone made you want to melt. You nuzzled further into his warmth and sighed.
In a silent plea for a kiss, your eyes flickered between his pink lips and dark eyes. Miguel obliged. He did have a lot of making up to do after all.
A/N: I just realized I forgot the add the taglist on this post. I apologize if you’ve already read it, but I couldn’t stand to not fix it.
GENERAL TAGLIST
@woahitslucyylu @briannab1234 @sheeshgivemeabreak @breakingnewsin-no-oneasked @angelreyesgirl @blessedboo @glimmerglittergirl @apantherinmypastlife @brownsugarcoffy @marvelmaree @starrynite7114 @scuzmunkie @thewarriorprincessxo @sadeyesgf @pearlkitten33 @imanerdychubbyqueen @literaturefeen @ourlittlesecretsoveragain @everyhowlmarksthedead @yourwonkywriter @trulysuccubus @sparklemichele
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