#i deleted my blog when i was 15 with the intent to take a break from tumblr. remade the same day
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grantwilson · 10 months ago
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you know what time it is
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dxnisheatingdetective · 1 year ago
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RP Quick Guide - Rules/Muse/Mun/Links
Post Updated: 01/09/2023
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I've made this quick guide for the RP blog @dxnisheatingdetective so that you can have a brief introduction to both Harvey and my RP Rules and decide if you’d like to investigate further. This is a sideblog, followbacks come from tealeavesandthorns
I RPed as Harvey previously on tumblr (with me taking a break/deleting for a while and returning now) - previous handles have included - askthedanisheatingdetective, dxnisheatingdetective, whodxntiowe, doomedanyhxw and possible variations of those.
Below is a brief bio, brief rules and a brief look at mun with important links for you at the bottom of the post.
Dropping below a read more so as not to clutter!
Harvey Bullock - About / Opens
BASICS Name: Harvey Bullock Nicknames/Alias: Bullock, The Bull, Fat ass, Face Claim: Donal Logue Age: late 40’s - late 50’s Gender: Male Sexuality: Heterosexual Date/Place of Birth: September 11th Currently: Gotham City Nationality/Species: American - Human Occupation: Detective Marriage Status: Single
HISTORY Harvey is a detective at the GCPD and it’s safe to say his life hasn’t exactly gone the way he thought it might.
Harvey yearned to be a detective from an early age and he applied to Police Academies outside of Gotham but just didn’t quite make the grade. Harvey made his peace with this early on and started at the GCPD as a uniformed officer working his way up the ranks.
Eventually Harvey would be paired with Dix and though Harvey tried to keep his white knight optimism, tried to keep his head above the criminality, tried to mostly do the right thing he realised that in the end he had to go along to get along and so Harvey was shaped by Gotham, he moulded to fit her form. He was been broken down by her and rebuilt so many times that he lost count. Harvey found he couldn’t fight Gotham entirely and that eventually like Dix he was probably going to end up swallowed whole by her.
The good intentions of a detective wanting to make a stand are still there, still in his heart but they have been mostly ground out of him.
Rules - Quick Look - Full Rules
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Mun and Muses are 18+ and would prefer to write with those 18+ (Muses can be any age though)
Unlike Muses, Mun is a serious introvert. That being said I'm friendly enough.
GIFs more than likely aren't mine.
Asks are always open
Hate isn't tolerated.
Keep it fun!
Mun is open to most ships and most subject topics when it comes to threads. If you'd like to develop a plot don't hesitate to message me but also feel free to interact via fluffy asks and memes.
Please read the full rules, or have any questions drop me an ask.
A Bit About Mun:
Mun is 30+ female, pronouns are she/they/that thing over there.
Mun has been writing for 15+ Years and first rp'd on Tumblr in 2009/2010
Mun is open to most fandoms and of course open to OCs!
Mun has Autism and potentially ADHD (a post about how this affects rping is here)
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These are the important links you might need if you wish to investigate Harvey further: 
| About | Rules | Verses | Headcanons | Opens | Open Memes |
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mavstudentvoice · 2 years ago
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Creating Healthy Eating Habits as a College Student
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Lately, I’ve been struggling with eating foods that are good for my body. I’ve fallen into a bad habit where I eat for convenience rather than for my health. I want to overcome this bad habit because I can already feel a significant change in my overall health when I choose to eat foods that don’t benefit me in any way. My intention with this blog post is to help me create new habits, and help you find new ones!
I’m not the grocery store’s biggest fan
If you enjoy your time at the grocery store, this new habit may not be for you, but it’s always something fun to try!
There’s something about going grocery shopping that is not fun for me. I dread the days I have to go and wait until the very last meal I could make before I go. It really only takes less than an hour, so I’m not sure what my problem is with them, I would rather just go online! If you’re an online shopper, shopping online for groceries could be a great idea for you. When you online grocery shop, you’re able to see everything in your cart instead of only what is on the top. You also can easily delete a grocery item vs. walking it all the way to its proper shelf.
An additional advantage to online grocery shopping is that you don’t have to wander around the store to find one ingredient, you can simply search for it in the search bar!
I’m a sucker for snacks
I love my snacks. I tend to eat smaller meals because I snack so much, but it’s totally fine if they’re healthy. (right?) Take 20 minutes out of your day to cut up vegetables or fruits for the week so you can easily access them when you want them. Fast foods and unhealthy foods are eaten so often because of the convenience. If you cut out the time factor, healthy foods can eventually become a convenience for you.
I’ll admit I’m not a cook
Baking is my thing, but cooking is not. I don’t like making meals because they usually turn out too big and I refuse to eat leftovers. (I promise I never waste; I hand them off to my boyfriend.) My workaround to this bad habit of never making a meal is making my own recipe book. Once a month, I’m going to try to spend a few hours looking for recipes that interest me and take the time to convert the measurements down. This way, I eliminate my excuse of not making a meal because I don’t want the leftovers. 
Plus, you can personalize your own recipe book online! Fill it with recipes that sound appealing. If you don’t know where to find recipes, Pinterest can make you hungry real fast. 
I usually wake up after my third alarm
I love my sleep, which unfortunately causes me to want more of it and sleep in. I am slowly learning to wake up earlier so I can make more time for myself throughout the day. My usual breakfast is two granola bars and coffee. “Breakfast is the most important meal of the day”. Is it? I’m not sure but I’ll believe anything if it gets me out of bed earlier.
Take the extra 15 minutes to make yourself something nutritious. Wake up 15 minutes earlier so you can start your day with a healthy breakfast. Maybe you can use another 15 minutes to pack yourself lunch! The point is to make time for your body’s needs. Fill yourself with good foods and start making these habits now before you make them into a hard-to-break routine. Eventually, you will start to feel the effects of what your health teacher warned you about.
I hope a month from now I’ll have these new habits down. If you’re in a similar situation, I hope you try them and go on this journey with me! Best of luck. 
-Belle
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avidoro · 4 years ago
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Edit: Guess I’ll put this in here since everyone is just glossing it over to look for the negative parts. I never said you couldn’t ship SessRin. I never said I was anti-SessRin. I know I tagged it as such, but it isn’t because of my opinion. I have friends who ship SessRin. I love those friends. What I mean by these statements is that the community in general is toxic because of the people in it who have caused problems for others. Like, for example, the person who felt the need to jump me about my personal ship because it wasn’t with Rin when I wasn’t even talking about a ship. Or the people who harassed the English voice cast to the point that even they were calling the SessRin community toxic. Or the people who are fighting to have any Sesshoumaru shipping blog deleted if Rin isn’t involved. I am capable of peacefully sharing Sesshoumaru with other shippers if they could be civilized. But since they aren’t, then I feel like I have the right to speak my mind. And those of you who feel the need to fight me about it are just proving my point because you’re so worked up that anyone could have a different opinion that you absolutely have to argue. That being said, I also stated that I would never have said a word about this if it weren’t for the fact that Rin is underage in Yashahime. Sunrise is trying to lie about how much time passed. They clearly didn’t do their own math. And while I’m fine with SessRin shippers who ship her as an adult, I will not tolerate the people who justify her being underage in Yashahime. Also to those trying to argue about Yashahime being canon, I would love to provide the evidence to the statement I saw, but it’s gotten lost in the sea of people arguing about the show being canon. It was something along the lines of her saying the story wasn’t canon or wasn’t hers but the three girls were and that she was washing her hands of InuYasha and other’s could do what they wanted with it. Which kind of implies it’s not canon but she doesn’t care. If I find it again I will definitely share it. But if Rumiko steps up and actually says the show is canon, then I’ll accept it as canon. But that doesn’t mean I’m okay with Rin being underage. But go ahead and continue to comment with your ridiculous arguments. New edit: @tiny-foots​ It’s not what I saw but I was provided this where Rumiko stated InuYasha was complete within herself meaning the story was done. She left it up to Mr. Sumisawa to write. Take it as you will, but I see that as her giving the okay for a fanfic to be officiated. But I don’t see it as canon. I suppose that can be left up to interpretation. But my personal belief is that it’s not canon. Even before all this I never even saw the original anime as canon.
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I am going to start off by saying that I always said I would never be anti-ship. But if this is what it's come to then I am completely against what is happening right now.
Let's just pretend my OTP isn't actually my OTP right now. What I ship has nothing to do with this. In fact I am a multi-shipper, so don't even think about that. This is beyond more than my personal shipping opinions. InuYasha was my comfort series during a very rough time and Sesshoumaru is my favorite character because of his massive character development and redemption arc. He is an astounding character.
The fact that Sunrise has "officially" (I refuse to say canon because it's not canon. Rumiko said so. Fight me!) paired him with Rin is the most disturbing and disgusting thing they could have possibly done. Again, I am not against people who do ship them. If that's what they enjoy then that's fine.
HOWEVER!
The SessRin community is toxic AF! They have been for a long time and now they've been given a reason to really be horrible people. And that's only one reason why I'm disgusted by this entire thing. And mind you, since Yashahime isn't canon anyway, I wouldn't have cared as much if they hadn't done it the way they had. Let me break this down for you. I'm going to list why SessRin is unhealthy, toxic, and morally wrong and I'll even list some of the justifying arguments shippers have tried to use to support it and explain why they're wrong too.
Pairing Sesshoumaru with Rin destroyed his character development and redemption.
Sesshoumaru's father had a strong desire to see his son learn compassion. Toward everyone! Humans and youkai alike. He learned that lesson through both a human and a youkai. Rin and Kagura. These were the characters who were meant to teach him to be compassionate toward others. By pairing him with Rin you have taken away that compassion that he learned. It's like sticking a giant middle finger up to all the humans he was supposed to learn to respect and say he only tolerates Rin and no one else. There goes his redemption! Way to go, Sunrise!
SessRin was never meant to become a thing.
Rumiko went out of her way to create a bond between Kagura and Sesshoumaru as well as Kohaku and Rin. It's clear who we were meant to ship them with. These characters were placed as a barrier between Rin and Sesshoumaru to avoid an improper ship. SessKagu is the ONLY canon Sesshoumaru ship.
No child in their right mind grows up to fall in love with the man who raised them from childhood.
And if they do then they need to seek counseling because that's not healthy. A normal child would grow up to view that man as her father.
And how about these lame and unjustifiable arguments that SessRinners are throwing out.
"He waited until she was an adult! She's 18!"
Do some research. She is not 18! Look at the the facts that have been compiled. She is 15 MAX. She's underage!
"This was normal back then!"
No it was not! Again, do your research! Nobility groomed children to be wives, yes, but it wasn't normal. Even then the girl wasn't bedded until she was an adult. Also, would you portray a black person, in media, as an abused slave in 1800s America by your story's "good guy" and say it's okay because it was normal back then?  I don't think so!
"They were meant to be together! It was a given! It was clear!"
Again, no it wasn't! Kagura was placed in the story for this purpose! She was in love with Sesshoumaru and he was falling in love with her. They are the ONLY canon Sess ship!
"Well, you're forgetting about the original series being about a 15-year-old girl getting with a 50+ year old man!"
There are so many reasons why this is an illogical statement. - InuYasha and Kagome met when they were mentally the same age. Sess and Rin met with he was mentally a young adult and she was EIGHT! - Kagome and InuYasha didn't have an official relationship until she returned from her time after three years... WHEN SHE WAS 18! - Every moment in the original story where Kagome was in an inappropriate situation she got mad and did something about it! She didn't just giggle and let the men around her ogle or touch her! - And my personal opinion, I also believe InuYasha and Kagome’s relationship was toxic anyway, so don’t try to hold that one over me. There’s a reason I’m a multi-shipper.
And one of my favorites, even from pre-Yashahime
"NO ONE is shipping child Rin with Sesshoumaru!"
Yeah? Go do a Google image search, you sickos. Edited to include this little treasure in the comments:
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Who’s putting words in her mouth? She stated, in an interview plain as day, that Yashahime was not canon! She didn’t write it. An official publication does not canon make! Not to mention “the woman who changed him” is such an incredibly vague statement. If it was meant to be Rin, she’d have just said Rin. As mentioned before, she was very adamant about pushing the Kagura x Sesshoumaru ship. And Kagura definitely changed him. Was it not his compassion toward her specifically that regained his arm and gave him a sword? I’m pretty sure “the woman who changed him” was meant to be a vague statement because the canonical intention was just to leave it open to interpretation and is probably meant to be some random village woman who bonded with Sesshoumaru and ultimately completed his change.
And if, by chance, she did mean Rin, she didn’t say it was canon. Just that she was his wife meaning that is who Sunrise set as his wife in the show. Think about it? She was answering the question of “who had his children in Yashahime.” If she meant Rin, she was avoiding spoilers and giving a hint to who Sunrise chose as his wife. That’s not saying she would have picked Rin, herself. She didn’t write it. So it seems to me that you are the one putting words in her mouth.
Now tell me, if your best friend from grade school who was adopted told you when she was a teen or even an adult, "My dad's hot. We decided to sleep together." would you not find that disturbing? That's SessRin right now.
Also:
HANYOU NO YASHAHIME IS NOT CANON! THIS IS PER RUMIKO TAKAHASHI HERSELF! DO NOT TRY TO JUSTIFY THAT SESSRIN IS CANON NOW BECAUSE IT ISN'T! IT'S JUST AN OVERGLORIFIED AND POORLY WRITTEN FANFICTION!
ONLY THE MANGA IS CANON! OG SESSHOUMARU IS THE ONLY SESSHOUMARU!! That being said, I still say if you do happen to be a SessRin shipper, then you do you. Enjoy what you want. But what is happening right now does not give you a right to justify any toxic behavior that your community is expressing. Again, I wouldn’t even be mad if Sunrise hadn’t portrayed Rin as still being underage. I won’t stand to see people justify this!
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gleekto · 4 years ago
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Summary: College AU/Famous!Blaine and Fanboy!Kurt - Kurt POV
Kurt really doesn’t have time to figure out the dating world between being a freshman at prestigious theatre school, LAADA,  and his active but secret blogging life in the Sing!Fandom. So what if Sing! ended last year? There are still fics to read and actors to follow. Especially the uber talented heartthrob lead, Blaine Anderson. He can act. He can sing. He can even dance. He’s gay. He’s out. And he’s only 24. Kurt is willing to twiddle his thumbs and click refresh until Blaine Anderson’s next project.
He just didn’t expect the next project to be on his roommate Rachel’s new TV show.
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9
Even Better than the Real Thing (10/13)
Kurt drops the phone as his heart starts to race and panic takes over. He feels like he’s going to throw up. No. He doesn’t have time to throw up. He immediately signs on to tumblr and deletes his blog. Gone. But it’s too late anyways. He calls Mercedes on autopilot. 
“It’s over, Mercedes,” Kurt shakes as he says it. “He knows.”
“What? Who knows what?” But he can practically see the information dawn on her as she says it. “He knows you were a fan? Shit.”
“Yes, specifically, he knows that I was LimaBlaineFan - and I say was because I just deleted.”
“Oh my god, Kurt. How did this happen? Are you okay?”
“No, I’m not okay. And I don’t know. Or I can guess. He surprise visited me and I forgot to close my laptop screen and I must have left him in my room while I was dealing with Rachel and her oat milk,” Kurt puts the pieces together. “Fucking oat milk.”
“So he ended it on the spot?”
“No. God. He didn’t even say anything. He must have  seen something but not much, gone home and read the blog, and then texted me 24 hours later with a terse goodbye.”
“So what did he say?” Kurt sends her the text. “It’s not great,” She agrees. “But that’s not exactly closure.”
“I don’t think I get closure after what I did. Just memories of our night together and of what an idiot I am.” Kurt goes over the whole story with Mercedes - how he obviously wanted to be chill when he met Blaine, didn’t want to seem like a desperate fanboy but just a friend of Rachel’s - which he is! That wasn’t a lie. And he always made sure to give Blaine an out, not to talk too much, but Blaine kept wanting to talk and flirt and - well, as soon as he really started to believe that they were more than friendly acquaintances with a mutual friend, he stopped blogging. But it was too late by that point to say ‘Oh by the way, I was such a big fan of Sing! that I have a blog about it and your name may feature.’ But he knows it’s all an excuse. Blaine told him the first time they met that a fan is not a friend. And he didn’t heed the warning. Or tell the truth.
Mercedes listens to the story she already knows, and affirms and agrees, but unfortunately, can’t really fix a situation that can’t be fixed. Kurt spends the night staring at his ceiling and the next day moping around the house, tired and cranky. He binges Gossip Girl and eats popcorn and texts Mercedes sad face emojis.
Even Rachel notices that something’s wrong when she comes in that evening.  “You’re still in pajamas?” She looks at him quizzically. “And you look like hell.”
“Thanks?”
“And I only point that out because it’s very unlike you.”
“I guess that is actually a compliment.”
“What’s wrong?” Before he thinks of what he’s going to say, Rachel interrupts again. “Wait. Blaine was a wreck today - bags under his eyes, forgot all his lines. Just said he had a rough night. Okay, Kurt. What is going on with you two?”
“Nothing now.”
“Now?”
“It’s not working out, okay?” Rachel starts to say something again but thinks better of it.
“Okay,” She seems to clue in to the fact that he does not want to talk about it. “I’ll go out later to get you a piece of cheesecake from Henry’s.” His favourite cheesecake place. 
“Thank you,” He says sincerely. “Best therapy.”
...
After his cheesecake, which did take his mind off the mess of his life for at least 15 minutes, he moves back to his bedroom for night two of ceiling gazing, when his phone buzzes.
Blaine: So you didn’t respond.
He stares at the message, willing the right response to come to him.
Kurt: I honestly just don’t know what to say. Other than I’m sorry. I guess that’s what I should have said.
Blaine: So you are LimaBlaineFan, right?
Kurt: Guilty. Very guilty.
Blaine: Shit.
Kurt: I know we’re done - it’s my fault. You don’t need to say anything.
Kurt can’t actually bear the idea of Blaine lecturing him on honesty amidst crushing his heart.
Blaine: It is your fault. But we should talk.
Kurt: We should?
Blaine: Meet me at the Coffee Bean tomorrow at 3, okay?
Kurt: Let me check my calendar.
Blaine: Cheeky.
Kurt knows he made him smile despite himself.
Kurt: I’ll be there.
...
Kurt gets to the Coffee Bean half an hour early so he can be sure to be there first. He buys Blaine his favourite medium drip and adds a vanilla almond biscotti. 
“These for me?” Blaine says as he sits down across from Kurt.
“The least I could do.” Blaine rolls his eyes and shakes his head, but he accepts the coffee and cookie. “I’m really sorry. I should have told you.”
“Yeah, you should’ve,” Blaine says and pauses, sipping his coffee. 
“Can I ask you a question?” Kurt starts.
Blaine shrugs. “Go for it.”
“Why did you ask me to meet you for coffee? I mean, after finding out the guy you just -” Kurt gets red despite himself.
“Got naked with,” Blaine fills in.
“Yes - was actually a fan following your career-”
“And my body parts,” Blaine adds and Kurt gets much redder.
“I mean, I think that gives you license to fully ghost me without another word.”
“True,” Blaine nods his head. “But for one, you are my co-star’s roommate-”
“At least that’s true,” Kurt sighs at himself.
“Also, I’m not an asshole.”
“But I probably gave you reason to think that I am one.”
“No - which is the real reason I wanted to talk. The timeline.” Kurt looks at him confused. “Your blog on tumblr. It seems like once we met, you only blogged a few times. And by the time I was interested in you, you stopped posting.”
Kurt nods, giving himself an internal high five for at least one decent choice. “I did. Right after we-”
“Made out all night?” Blaine has got to stop putting these images back into his head in the midst of a break up conversation.
“No. It was before that. After you  - you know we talked in my room-”
Blaine remembers, smiling.  “When I got you to tell me you had never been kissed so I could tell you that you should be.”
“You’re so calculating,” Kurt shakes his head.
Blaine raises his hands in defense. “My intentions were pure, I promise. Besides, I could say the same about you.”
“I wasn’t calculating! I wasn’t even trying to be your friend, let alone your, you know. I am definitely not sophisticated enough to try to deceive you to get you into bed, god. I was just trying to seem reasonably normal and cool around my roommate’s new co-star who by complete coincidence was my celebrity crush of the last four years. It was way too uncool to reveal my alter ego to you.”
Blaine smiles, probably despite himself. “Can I tell you some of my favourites?”
“Oh god.”
It seems Blaine spent the better part of his evening delving deeply into the fandom mind of LimaBlaineFan, because he had screencapped some of Kurt’s oldest, and cringiest posts.
-Why isn’t he shirtless in that scene? The other guys are shirtless. Roy is hot. And no, I don’t think he’s embarrassed. 
“Well, you are right about that. I’m not camera shy.” 
-Thank God Blaine Anderson has a better fashion sense than Roy. Roy and his loose jeans and sweatpants - how would I even catch a glimpse? But did you see Blaine on that red carpet? Maroon suit, pants so tight. His ass is perfection.
-Blaine’s interview for Pride was perfection. He says we might even catch him out on the dance floors, dancing with some hotties. Maybe then he’ll be shirtless.
And of course, Blaine appreciated Kurt’s hard work on one of his most recent posts - The privileges and pitfalls of playing straight for an out gay actor: Quotes from Blaine Anderson’s interviews.
Kurt lets Blaine read each one, sitting silent in embarrassment and biting his lip through it all. It’s the least he deserves. Just as Blaine finishes his list and Kurt is about to go into profuse apology once again,  they’re interrupted.
A young woman who looks about seventeen scurries quickly up to their table. “Hi. I’m sorry. I know you’re busy. I’m just such a huge fan of Sing! And now That’s So Rachel-” - If that was a fan test, she passed. She knows both shows. That’s a minimum. “Can I get a pic with you?”
“Of course. Thank you so much for watching.” Blaine takes her phone like a pro and angles it so he and the girl are both in it, Kurt trying to avoid being the photobomb in the background. Blaine turns back to him as the girl leaves. 
“I guess that would’ve been me a few months ago.”
“For you, I might have even given a hug. Or the coveted kiss on the cheek. I always try to connect with the gay guy fans.”
“You succeeded?” Kurt tries and Blaine laughs. At least the energy between them is better. Much better. Like he won’t have to hide in a corner if he’s ever at an event with Blaine again or anything like that.
“I guess I did.”
“The first time I met you, you told me that a fan is not a friend.”
“I did.”
“Would you have asked me out if you had known from the beginning?”
“Probably not. Against the rules.”
“That’s what I thought.” There’s an awkward pause - Kurt’s not sure there’s anything else to say and apparently Blaine agrees because he switches the topic to the latest script and his excitement about working with Patti Lupone - who apparently, even gets to slap him. By the time they leave the café, Kurt feels relieved. He’s survived his first break up. Not that they were really together. He doesn’t have the energy to grieve the loss of kissing, and touching, and ironically still not having seen Blaine shirtless (pantless, yes). He’s sure it will hit him like a ton of bricks after he finally gets a real night of sleep, and then he will have Rachel prepare the cheesecake. Again. 
He crawls into bed early that night, grateful the shock and awful adrenaline of the last two days has finally left his body. His phone buzzes as he closes his light and he plans to text Mercedes back to tell her he’ll update her tomorrow. But it’s not Mercedes.
Blaine: Some rules are made to be broken.
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nightcoremoon · 5 years ago
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for the record I'm not actually upset over the comments people are making. I've been doing the internet fight thing for 15 years. but here's an anecdote.
a couple years ago when Discourse™ first got its start, I saw a post. it said "saying 'my dude' is antiblack racist because it's just a watered down way of saying 'my n*gga'" except he actually said the word because op was black. and I was like. what the fuck am I reading. I check the notes and he's all like "if you're white you're not allowed to disagree with me". I'm like wha. granted there were a bunch of people who had said "I'm black and you're an idiot" and it died out and lo and behold if I say my dude I don't get crucified by black people so it's clearly not racist.
then a meme surfaced. you start ranting and raving in a really long sentence or something that's usually directed towards people who do or say bigoted things and then ending it with a comma and a soccermom name, KAREN. it was used pretty much everywhere by everyone. but then one strangely peculiar thing happened.
people started sending anonymous suicide baits to people who used that meme, because "that meme was created by black people so it's culturally appropriating black culture to use that meme if you're white". including one trans kid who was like 14, living in an abusive and homophobic household. he used it in a vent post. and in the notes at least three people were harassing him about it. he deleted his blog. I worry he might have killed himself.
the people who were sending the messages were in their early to mid 20s. to a 14 year old kid. because he used a black created meme. to vent about his abusive household. I shouldn't have to explain how fucked up that is.
anyway I'd come to his defense and made a post about how it's ridiculous to cyberbully a child because he used a meme he didn't have the license to use. and tumblr flipped out. I had hundreds of messages from people calling me a nazi. yeah sure a disabled mentally ill queer trans leftist is totally a nazi. right. they said I was racist, they said I was homophobic to gay black people, they said that I was a liar who fabricated that story I told earlier about that kid because by the time people were asking for receipts the post was deleted. I got suicide baited, threatened, the whole shebang.
I didn't care. I was just irritated by the huge influx of messages. it was an inconvenience. after the life I lead, mean words on the internet from a spineless coward hiding behind the veil of anonymity are water off a duck's back. yes I might use fuckin profanity or italicized fonts or CAPITAL LETTERS for emphasis, but it's because I'm a wordsmith. language is an art form. a keyboard is my brush. I'm proud of my ability to harness the english language and twist and contort it to my own specifications. I can use it for great good, in helping people through tough times with inspiring words that incite courage, for great funny, in jokes that might take some thinking and context to really understand (especially puns), for great sexy (talking dirty basically but only with certain people and when the time is right), or for insulting people. anyone who knows me knows that I'm a good person and that the only people who ever know what it's like to receive a tongue lashing are the ones who fucking deserve it. not the people who see a single text post taken out of context as a basis to judge my entire character on. but I enjoy it. I enjoy using words as weapons on the battlefield of discourse. it's because I'm good at it. beyond the abilities of most opponents which is unfortunate because it just sails right over their heads most of the time but still, my fellow intelligent company is able to grasp the meanings and intentions of both sides. I excel at this. and the fact that I don't take things personally (I'll certainly pretend to when it'll gain me the advantage) is just icing on the cake.
there is just one problem though.
I'm autistic and possess hyperempathy.
"what does that have to do with this?"
see, here's the thing. if some random person makes an offhand comment intended as a joke but didn't really have the "correct" amount of blatant humor injected into it, and you are the type of person to then go to them and tell them they'd be better off dead, they're just a retard who should stop posting, nobody cares about them, whatever, you are NOT the type of person to think "hmm this person's only 14, maybe I should reconsider the choice to send them a death threat" or "oh hey this person has depression, perhaps I'll remove that suicide bait part and replace it with rainbow lollipops and unicorn stickers :3". you don't give a fuck about all that. you just wanna reap destruction and watch the world burn. you wouldn't give a fuck if that kid commits suicide because you don't have any compassion or empathy. if you would send the kind of shit you sent me to anyone, and I had the chance to meet you in person, I'd make you swallow your own teeth.
these anons don't care how old I am. they don't care what my mental state is. they don't care about any of that shit. they only care about inflicting pain, deserved or not, and all over dumb shitposts. over "lmao if you break up over mario kart you're kind of immature and should work on your relationship skills :P". over saying Karen at the end of your sentence. over greeting a friend with "my dude". over liking steven universe. it doesn't matter what the topic of the day is. any excuse will do to go for the proverbial jugular.
the existence of these people is what pisses me off more than the actual things that they say. how dare you exist. how dare you spread hate. how dare you not be a paragon of human decency. if someone says something racist or homophobic or antisemitic or misogynistic or body shaming or pro fascist or bootlicking or genocidal or anything contributing directly to harmful actions towards people based on their demographics rather than the choices that they make, fuck 'em. you lost my compassion for you. you're a piece of old chewing gum under a table. you're a little chunk of dookie that didn't get flushed. you're a moldy apricot pit at the bottom of an unlined trash can. you made a conscious choice to be a bad person. if you are a literal nazi, I'd remove your bones and then put them back in the wrong places without any anesthetic. if you are bigoted because society brainwashed you, I'd call you character into question and point out your hypocrisy. if you made a dumb joke on a shitpost I'd just scroll past because I'm not gonna waste my time on you. but if you would tell a kid to kill themself, you bet your ass I'll tear into you like hungry wolves into a deer carcass with zero remorse or sense of your own feewings. if you want me to care about the feelings of terrible people, you have another thing coming. if they would hurt people who don't deserve it, they're on the shit list.
and I refuse to be told that I'm a bad person because of that. severe, yes. ruthless, maybe. evil? that's pushing it a lot. a little unhinged? I've not been hinged since I was 3 years old. an asshole? I vehemently disagree considering the people i'm rude to are themselves assholes; this isn't some edgy friedrich nietsche quote taken out of context. merciless? okay I'll give you that. but a bad person? fuck that and fuck you.
you don't get to judge my character because I'm ~mean~ to dickheads.
in fact I'm somehow more pissed off at those people than the people sending the shitty messages in the first place. lashing out I can understand because that was me once upon a time. but passive neutrality under guise as absolute good? you're attacking the reaction. you're centrists attacking antifa. you're part of the problem. especially when you use sneaky tactics that take advantage of good nature, "heyyyyy buddy, let's talk about your anger issues, are you okaaaaaay, taaaaalk to me, you need to apologize to the people who want you dead because you were mean to them and that means you deserve it". literal cult tactics. evil. actual legitimate active performed evil. or just an ignorant misguided fool that thinks he's the dalai lama. but... pride is a deadly sin after all.
anyway tl;dr i don't give a shit about the actual things you say to me. the only thing that pisses me off is the fact that you'd say those things to another person completely unprovoked, no matter who that person is.
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winteriron-trash · 6 years ago
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About Me/FAQ
Hey, welcome to my blog! This is my -well, usually- Marvel-centric blog that has everything WinterIron, Bucky Barnes, and Tony Stark, as well as some general shitposts of my own wild adventures. I figured it’s best to keep up this trend of updating my ‘About Me’ page every follower milestone. So thank you all so much for over 3,000 followers, I never expected to break that many followers, let alone in less than a year on Tumblr. I appreciate each and everyone one of you, so really, thank you for sticking around with my bullshit.
Per the usual, I don’t do drama, I don’t do discourse. If you have a serious problem with me or anything I’ve written/done on this blog, please take it up with me personally. I will delete anon hate (if I get any, I haven’t gotten any yet…) and I think it’s all just pointless. I can be salty and derpy sometimes, but I will never purposely say something malicious. I’m not here for that negativity.
Now, to the FAQs.
Do you have an Ao3/Pillowfort/other social media?
I do have an Ao3, you can find me at Gothic_Lolita. I don’t cross-post everything, and a lot of my stuff on Ao3 isn’t WinterIron or even Bucky or Tony-centric, so if you’d like to see some other stuff I write, feel free to check over there. I don’t have a Pillowfort, nor do I plan on getting one. It took me forever to get this platform right, I’m not in the place to bother learning how to navigate a new one. I don’t do Snapchat or Instagram or Twitter because I am not nearly basic or cool enough for that stuff. The only social media I use is Tumblr and Pinterest, and trust me, my Pinterest is nothing interesting enough to be worth linking.
Do you have a tagging system?
I’m… trying, honestly. I’m trying to adjust my tags and systems because of the… wildness Tumblr is having with blocking and purging certain tags. I try to be funny in my tags, and I swear a lot, and apparently ‘fuck’ is being filtered out of the tag search, so that’s fun and completely screwed me over. As it stands, the important tags are ‘winteriron-trash writes’ (my writing tag), ‘shitposting with becca’ (any wild shitposts of my own sad creation), ‘not about marvel’ (any posts that are my general bullshittery and not Marvel related), ‘becca gives mediocre writing advice’ (a new tag I’m trying to use that’ll tag any post that I give writing advice on), ‘becca spills the tea’ (a tag for whenever I post my metas or opinions on Marvel characters, plots, etc), and the citrus scale which I explain in a post here
Do you write original fiction?
Yes, but I rarely, if ever, post it. I think I have all of one poem on Tumblr, any absolutely nothing original on Ao3. I write original works all the time, especially poetry and novels, but I’m super shy about being vulnerable and putting my stuff out there. I do wanna post my original writing somehow, but considering a fandom blog and Ao3 aren’t really the place for it, I’ll just keep it all hidden inside of me, and one day I’ll die. You’re more than welcome to ask me about any of my original writings, trust me, I am always willing to ramble about the shit I write, it’s pathetic.
What type of fanfiction do you write?
For this blog, mostly WinterIron fics or gen fics focused on Bucky or Tony. I do write about OT3s on here occasionally, but they usually include WinterIron in some way. Most of the time. I’ve somehow gotten to writing some weird stuff lately, to be honest. I’ll work with MCU, Sony Venom, and Spiderverse characters and canon, with the occasionally comic canon shoved in there. I have occasionally written crossover content with DC characters, but that usually relies on comic versions -or at least my own remixes of them- rather than the DCEU. On my masterlist, you can check out all the things I’ve written!
What are your ships besides WinterIron? NOTPs?
I’ll ship almost anything, and I’m a huge fan of rarepairs/interesting relationships simply to explore the possibilities of it, particularly when they include Bucky or Tony. My top OTPs besides WinterIron are currently Phlint, FalconShield, and BlackPepper. As for NOTPs, I strongly dislike Stucky, Stuckony, Thorki, and Staron for reasons of just not being able to see those characters together romantically. Feel free to send me the wildest rarepair your mind can think of, chances are I’ve probably already thought of it myself so I’d love the chance to ramble about/write for it. I’m a big fan of weird OT3s as well, just see the weird shit on my masterlist.
Are you in any fandoms besides Marvel?
I’m into DC, Star Trek, classic literature, Percy Jackson/HoO/Kane Chronicles, She-Ra, Carmen Sandiego, indie gaming, Supernatural, vulture culture, HYDRA Trash Party, and musicals. Yes, I’m aware I was born to be a geek. Trust me, I’ve grown very used to it.
Do you take prompts?
Honestly, sending me a prompt/headcanon/idea is a shot in the dark. I have prompts sitting in my inbox that has been there for about a year that I’ve been meaning to write. Chances are if you send me a prompt yes I’ve seen it, yes I think it’s lovely, but god I do not have the time. Occasionally a prompt will really grab my eye and I’ll just have to write something for it, but sometimes even that can take months to finish. Don’t be surprised if you send me a prompt and I randomly fill it seven months later. I’m prone to doing so. I love being tagged in existing prompt/headcanon posts and asked to write it (as I have a bad habit of hijacking posts to write stuff for them to begin with…) just know that once again the chances of me writing it are about a 50/50. Also, make sure the OP is okay with you asking me to write it, it’s never my intention to steal someone else’s spotlight, I just want to take cool ideas and throw my two cents in.
Is there anything you won’t write?
Drugs and alcohol are hard nos for me. They’re personal triggers that if you really want to know more about, you can send me an ask or message about. If I’ve listed something as a NOTP, I will not write anything with it. I strongly dislike writing kid fics, mundane AUs, damsel in distress Tony fics, and A/B/O, but I’m willing to work with an idea if it’s good enough. It really depends on the situation.
Do you offer writing advice/reviews?
Yep! I’m down to answer any questions on writing fanfic or just writing in general. I love talking about writing and all that. Seriously, I like talking about writing almost as much as I like talking about Marvel. I’m more than open to reading a few chapters of your fic or book or whatever and telling you my honest thoughts, but I probably won’t have time to read all of it if it’s more than 5k long, because I’m just a busy person. And I will be honest because I want to be helpful. Don’t ask me for my honest opinion if you just want your ego stroked.
Can I ask your opinion on [insert topic here]?
Always. I am always open to sharing my honest opinions, regardless of backlash I’ll receive for it. I’d rather be my honest self online -the one place I can be my honest self- then a fake mask made to please others. Whether it be fandom ships, in-universe meta, or non-fandom related topics, feel free to ask me. I love talking meta, or just general thoughts and opinions on random stuff. Trust me, I’m far too opinionated for my own good. Ask literally anyone who’s met me.
How long have you been writing?
All seventeen years of my sad, sad life. I loved writing stupid little stories when I was a kid, that slowly morphed into shitty “books”, then I went through a poetry phase in junior high, and when I was about 14 I wrote my first fanfiction. I posted my first fanfic when I was 15, and have been posting fanfiction for over a year and a half now. I started Tumblr in late February but didn’t start writing fics here until about March because I am a shy bitch.
Aaaaaaand now for some stupid shit about me you didn’t ask for.
My name is Becca, or Winter, or Dumbass, whatever you prefer, and I’m a dumbfuck 17 yr old lesbian from upstate New York. (The ‘upstate’ part is important. Don’t ask me if I live in NYC. Just don’t.) I’m a junior in high school and planning to study English and Marketing in college, to hopefully become an editor. Hopefully. I’m actually a pretty boring and dumb bitch, which makes it all the more concerning that I am steadily gaining popularity on this hellsite. Someone help me.
I mentioned some of my interests above, but some other stuff I’m into includes knitting, playing piano, tea, collecting (hoarding) notebooks, photography, editing, music, and being a general idiot. I’m a wild child in ripped jeans and a leather jacket, which should not fool you because I’m far too shy and afraid of everything to be cool like that. I sound a lot cooler online because I’ve gotten so used to online interactions from making friends and running my own Discord server, but in real life I am unrecognizable. I’ve been in a grade of 60 people with the same people since kindergarten and some of them still don’t know my name.
I’m mentally ill and all that, but we’re working on getting… better. Writing schedules are a mess from me and sometimes I’m falling apart so, that’s fun. It doesn’t usually affect my blog because I internalize that shit, but occasionally the self-deprecating humor can get to be a little too close to the truth. And just the general spastic nature of my blog reflects the utter chaos of my mind.
So anyway, that’s me, please be my friend. Also, because this seems to come up more and more. Please don’t be afraid of me/intimidated by me. I know I look all cool and popular, but I am literally a hot mess just like the rest of us. If you want to climb your way into my messages and just,,,, scream at me about something you think I’d like, or just scream in general, go ahead. I really won’t mind, I promise. I need… friends, or so my therapist tells me.
Oh, and here’s a face reveal.
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Yes, I am that absolute idiot of a person, lying splat in the middle of my elementary playground field for,,,, reasons???? I don’t really remember the story behind that picture tbh, but it’s my entire personality in a single picture, so I dig it.
And here’s my actual face, with a cheap ring in my mouth and a fox filter because I thought I looked cute, okay? Leave me be.
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Tadah.
I swear I’m funny and talented sometimes, please like me.
As always, feel free to send me an ask or a message about anything you’d like. 
Check out my Masterlist if you want, and join my Discord Server.
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ajabsusbjsbsbanns · 6 years ago
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Warning for some mentions of sexual intimacy and also somewhat cp?.. the intimacy is not explicit by any means. however i go into detail on why their art is bad so just keep this in mind.
please consider reading this whole thing before jumping to a conclusion
(and im aware the screenshots above are somewhat out of context. this was going to be short but it isnt now)
hey! a deviantart user by the name of foxdragonlover drew nsfw art of spyro and cynder. there was some backlash and they had this to say. i really dont have nearly enough energy to read through this fucking novel of a post but i skimmed it. now please pay attanetion to these parts of the post.
“When i drew that picture of Spyro and Cynder, it came from a place of love and strong feelings.If someone draws art of those two as adults being more raw and wild, with the intent of just doing that as part of their story, that's normal!I can imagine Cynder growing into the type who is a little domineering in the sack, whilst Spyro would be more submissive and tender/attentive.These thoughts, through development and story when you treat characters as actual characters and not as pieces of meat, is fine.”
what theyre saying i that as long as they fleshed out the characters and dont just see them as moving pixels on a screen they have a right to draw porn of it because it’s “development”.
now please keep in mind that it has been said spyro in the original games is 12 years old. 
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now although this doesnt tell us much. spyro is a child. he looks nothing like the other dragons in the game. hes closer in looks to the baby dragons in YotD that any of the elders. not to mention his voice is that of a child-teen. now yes. i understand that this is the original games.
“what about TLOS series you moron” you cry.
fear not. i have done some research on that as well.
in the first game of the legend of spyro series spyro is roughly 12 years old.
the wendy promotional toy that was released when the game was first out comes with a small tag that gives some insite into the characters of the TLOS series. 
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now feel free to accuse me of editing these pictures. but you’ll see here that they are in fact real.
so what does this tell us? well.. not much i guess. however im not stopping here.
“yea yea spyro is 12. but stupid! he’s only 12 in the first game!”
alright. sure! youre correct in that spyro is 12 for the first game. however he is also twelve for the second. the second game happens almost immediatly after the first. meaning at most spyro is 13 for half of it. along side this, cynder is also the same age as him. same goes for sparx.
“well, but those arent DotD!”
You are correct! They arent! however they give us a clue on how old spyro, cynder and sparx are in the third game!
this comment on a game forum mentions that spyro is 15 in the third game.
“but lolbit you fuggin gnome! some dumb forum doesnt mean anything!”
Once again you are correct! it does not. however the poster on the forum is right. spyro is fifteen as per mentioned in this screenshot of the actual dialogue of the third game.
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hunter mention 3 years having passed. which would mean spyro, cynder and sparx are in fact 15. 15 is not an adult. You should not be depicting a minor in sexual situations EVER. you should not be “aging up” a character for nsfw art. and you ESPECIALLY should not be doing this when you are a 23 year old. dont believe me? their Furaffinity account specifies their age here! please be warned there is NSFW art on their account.
now im sure youre asking why im throwing such a fuss over this. well dear reader, fae/fox refuses to awknowledge that they did anything wrong and they continue to argue that “its okay if theyre mature and ive written a story for them”. that of course was paraphrasing. however here is their exact words on the matter. “But when you take young characters that you love inside and out, and develop their lives and their relationships, and mold them into more mature characters (based around the premise of human emotions and sentience), that's normal.Drawing those grown characters doing mature things is normal.Projecting real life stuff onto characters, whether they're canonically only ever shown as children or as adults while working through their story, is normal.There is so much worse to harp on. “
please keep in mind that no where in this paragraph here is it mentioned that the characters are adults. they are stated to be mature. however, maturity does not = age. it means your maturity mentally. spyro is extremelly mature for a 15 year old. he saves the world and handles the fact that he was plucked from his home before he was hatched and was raised by a family that was not his blood family even though he is still a child. a MINOR. cynder handles her corruption and the fact that she was used as a tool for an evil master as well as she can. she’s extremelly mature for her age. but again, she is only 15.
now of course im expecting that legendary comment of
“dumpass. theyre fictional. duhhhh. they aren’t real”
and to you my dear friend I have some links for you to read. i personally would never be able to sum it up in words the way these posts have. here are some links about why fiction does in fact = reality at times.(and thank you to Jade for allowing me to use their blog for these links!)
click here, here, here, and here
now that youre done reading those, im going to analize the post created by fox/fae and discuss some of the points they made.
the first part i analized earlier im going to bring back again for one more talk.
“When i drew that picture of Spyro and Cynder, it came from a place of love and strong feelings.If someone draws art of those two as adults being more raw and wild, with the intent of just doing that as part of their story, that's normal! I can imagine Cynder growing into the type who is a little domineering in the sack, whilst Spyro would be more submissive and tender/attentive.These thoughts, through development and story when you treat characters as actual characters and not as pieces of meat, is fine.”
lets break this apart.
“When i drew that picture of Spyro and Cynder, it came from a place of love and strong feelings.If someone draws art of those two as adults being more raw and wild, with the intent of just doing that as part of their story, that's normal! “.
it does not matter if it came from a place of love. what you’re literally saying is you had strong feelings to draw spyro and cynder having sex. thats the raw of it. and yes. it is normal and okay if you would like to draw two consenting adults in a time of intimacy. however you did not draw two adults. theyre children. minors.
“But when you take young characters that you love inside and out, and develop their lives and their relationships, and mold them into more mature characters (based around the premise of human emotions and sentience), that's normal.“
i already discussed the maturity thing. you have not yet called them adults. you said mature. which more or less translates to “im too scared to admit that i didnt age them up. theyre still minors in the picture”. this is scurting around the problem rather than addressing it. and no im not addressing the next part of the paragraph. no one asked your personal views on how tender and soft a literal minor would be during intercourse. and again. they are minors. the characters are portrayed as humanistic and sentient. and fae/fox agrees on that. that is one thing they are right for.
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however. that doesn’t erase all else that they’ve done. next.
“Someone even got mad that i hid the comments and acted like i hid the person who accused me only, but really i hid everyone's comment.Save for one from each of two of my friends, which were not hidden because i found them encouraging/interesting.Those are hidden now, though. I hid my comments, too, and part of me hiding that stuff helps protect 1. the commenter and secondly, i just hate looking at all of that sometimes.I counted and there are 20 hidden comments in my section.There will probably be more later. Do you know how embarrassing that is for me?I genuinely hate drama, but damn if i won't defend myself when i know my truth and someone challenges it. If it weren't for the nice things people said to me, i would just disable comments all together and wipe the slate clean, but i guess this has shown me i value the love i receive more than the hate, even if it leaves a scar on my work -- or even my attitude.”
hoo boy. alright.
“Someone even got mad that i hid the comments and acted like i hid the person who accused me only, but really i hid everyone's comment.Save for one from each of two of my friends, which were not hidden because i found them encouraging/interesting.Those are hidden now, though.”
alright. this is a blatant lie. they have blocked a decent amount of comments but they are lying when they say they only kepts up a few friends. not to mention they say they deleted those after. there are far more comments than 2 from a few friends.
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(its scribbled out cause you can actually see the art behind it. which is still nsfw)
“I hid my comments, too, and part of me hiding that stuff helps protect 1. the commenter and secondly, i just hate looking at all of that sometimes.I counted and there are 20 hidden comments in my section.There will probably be more later.”
although yes they did hide some of their comments in order to remove the whole chain its extremelly hard to believe that this is out of a place of safety for the commenter. because they left my comment up and allowed a friend of their to comment on it as well. along side this they blocked me so i couldn’t defend myself either.
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and now this isnt me jumping to a conclusion. my comment is from 10 hours ago. thats a lot of time to delete a comment.
“Do you know how embarrassing that is for me?I genuinely hate drama, but damn if i won't defend myself when i know my truth and someone challenges it. If it weren't for the nice things people said to me, i would just disable comments all together and wipe the slate clean, but i guess this has shown me i value the love i receive more than the hate, even if it leaves a scar on my work -- or even my attitude.”
this is a long one but i feel it fits together well enough to analize it all together. but ohhh man. it sure is embarassing to have to hide the comments that are accusing you of drawing CP huh? it really is embarassing? because you hate drama right?. listen. it doesnt matter if its embarassing to you. you drew nsfw art of child characters. and now youre upset that you have to go through and hide the comments of people calling you out for it. do you realize how outlandish that is? and oof. listen. the fact that you wanna “wipe the slate clean” and “disable comments” to hide from the fact that people are calling you out, rather than admitting this and deleting the piece shows that you are quick to hide and shove all of this under the rug rather than addressing it. and as for that last comment. listen... you sticking your fingers in your ears and yelling rather than addressing peoples concerns and listening to their criticism is not you valuing love over hate. its you refusing to awknowledge your misdoings and pretending youve done nothing wrong. thats a horrible mentality to have. and of course this is going to leave a scar on your work. you drew CP and refused to awknowledge it even after people brought it to your attention.
“I know in my heart of hearts what is right and what is wrong, i know what is justifiable and what isn't.I'm not sitting here trying to justify what i drew because i know it's not wrong, but i want it to be known that i am damn sad that someone who said they've "supported me for a few years" suddenly, over one picture they didn't like/didn't understand, chose to accuse me of basically drawing child pornography -- which is a major and very dangerous accusation, by the way, fought me over it, told me to "die mad," and then blocked me . If that were some random troll running by shitting on my art i'd be angry, but after some words i'd just block them and move on.But when a watcher or someone who has enjoyed my work just totally thrashes me or automatically loses faith in/respect for me, it hurts.Yes, it hurts!I'm not made of stone, i'm not used to this level of drama.I hate conflict. It hurts.But i once said i want to go far and wide with my passion, and that's gonna mean taking some low blows along the way.It's just something i have to learn to deal with like an adult.” 
once again im going to go through this and explain why its... oh so wrong.
“I know in my heart of hearts what is right and what is wrong, i know what is justifiable and what isn't.I'm not sitting here trying to justify what i drew because i know it's not wrong “
you telling yourself you did nothing wrong and refusing to awknowledge peoples criticisms of you isnt you knowing in your “heart of hearts” that youre right. its you being ignorant to peoples concerns. and how do you know its not wrong? because you say so? because your friends say so? people have addressed this issue by giving you facts and explanations on why its wrong and you deleted these comments. that isnt right at all.
“but i want it to be known that i am damn sad that someone who said they've "supported me for a few years" suddenly, over one picture they didn't like/didn't understand, chose to accuse me of basically drawing child pornography -- which is a major and very dangerous accusation, by the way, fought me over it, told me to "die mad," and then blocked me . ”
Listen. these people who supported you are sad that you’re defending drawing CP. you arent the victim in this scenario. you have no right to be sad when you actively chose to draw this. it is all your doing that these people have removed their support for you. as have I. these people are not to blame because they are disgusted that you drew something like this. and we are aware this is dangerous and a major accusation. however it is true. what you have drawn, by definitions, is CP. and now i hate to be this person. but you deleted all the comments. so there really isnt proof of this. i hate to pull that card but honestly.. this is the definiton of “pics or it didn’t happen”
“If that were some random troll running by shitting on my art i'd be angry, but after some words i'd just block them and move on.But when a watcher or someone who has enjoyed my work just totally thrashes me or automatically loses faith in/respect for me, it hurts.Yes, it hurts!I'm not made of stone, i'm not used to this level of drama.I hate conflict.”
once again. you’re to blame for this. you are playing a pity card yet you drew ths. the whole “it hurts me too” arguement is null. It doesnt work. you drew the art and chose to defend it. you have no right to be upset when people voiced their concerns about it. and conflict wouldnt arise if you actually listened to peoples concerns about this rather than immediately blocking them and playing the victim card.
“It hurts.But i once said i want to go far and wide with my passion, and that's gonna mean taking some low blows along the way.It's just something i have to learn to deal with like an adult.”
first of all you dont need to get poetic here. you drew CP, got called out for it and then made a post crying about it all. and if your passion is drawing porn of spyro and cynder, children characetrs, then youre not a good person. and if you defending CP is really when youre going to act like an adult then you clearly have the wrong priorities.
“I'm not some perfect martyr out to try and prove i can't do any wrong.Hell those of you who watch my side account have seen my ass a LOT, and you've also seen me try to grow from it when i'm wrong.I should not have given that commenter the gratification of pissing me off so much, but it happened.I didn't exactly blow my top, but it's still something i ought to get a handle on because i know this won't be the last time someone harasses me.”
heres the thing. the only people who can vouch for you here are your followers who are defending your actions here. you can’t use your side account as an excuse of “ive grown as a person” when the account isnt public and no one has access to it other than those who you select to. and on the second part. listen. youre 23. youre over the legal age in the states and i believe everywhere else. youre a grown adult. and if you consider people saying “youre disgusting for drawing CP and defending it” as harassment then you truely do need to grow up. you shouldnt be praised for not freaking out at people for calling you out on this kind of stuff.
“As i told someone else who's barked at me, it would also be hella wrong if one character was an adult and was a child and i aged the child up so they could fuck.I HATE that shit.That to me is wrong and weird, but here they're the same age, as adults. To me, it's not weird.Honest to God the worst/weirdest age thing i ever got swept away by was ZaDr, and i've been thinking about that lately and am considering at some point going back and throwing in head canon and trying to make it better so that it isn't "nasty”. I've gotten smarter and wiser since then.So there's definitely some hypocritical material in my folders, too, and i'll go ahead and admit that.I was younger and stupider at the time, but trust me when i say i never have looked at a child character and thought of them sexually.Ever.It's wrong.”
alright first im going start by saying this is in reference to my comment. now when refering to someone, when youre trying to earn peoples pity and understanding, you shouldnt jump to insult them. i wasn’t barking aat you. i was addressing your behaviour. and now. this is the first spot youve addressed them being “adults” in your art. every other time you mention it you call them mature which is a cop out. its only when you’re finally addressing the exact issue that you start to state how you are depecting them as adults. which, aging up a character for porn is still wrong. (which i will explain a bit better after im done this). and also you arent to be praised for seeing that as wrong. thats a normal response. no one was asking if you see it as wrong. and most people assume that until stated otherwise, this is the norm. most people see that as disgusting.
now you say to you it isnt weird. listen. to you it isnt weird because its your art and you dont like being called out for drawing CP. do you see what im getting at? now also i dont know what you’re talkign about here so i wont address it incase i get the wrong impression and speak out of line, however you say you’ve never looked at a child character sexually. yet you drew cynder and spyro intimately. understand this. aging up a character doesnt mean you look at the character in a more adult light. it means you’re attempting to justify to youself and make yourself feel better and safer on the idea of the character having sex. which. is. wrong.
im not addressing the last two paragraphs on the journal as it is just them praising their followers for praising them, however i will address their comment ont their art piece. 
“ And since apparently some people don't understand this, S/C are 18+ here.If anyone ever assumes i would draw children having sex, i swear to God... “
from what i can tell this was a saveface. they put this comment once they censored the piece. their fA has the piece as well and they dont address the age of the characters. which means that this was just added on to prevent them from the issues being addressed by commenters.
now from what i can tell. their AU doesnt really exist apart from some world building. i couldnt find a long detailed AU where the characters were aged up and lived a life. the only time ive found them mentioning the AU is when they talked about the art piece. whats that mean? it doesnt really exist. not publicly atleast. which means the “AU” could entirely just mean its an excuse to draw porn of the characters. now that last bit sounds like me picking for straws i understand. however it is  very possible. heres a post that explains why its not good to age up characters. (understand that im aware the post is discussing and age gap however it addresses some good points)
heres the post
now if you read it you’ll see this part.  “ aging up is taking two characters who would have an inappropriate relationship in canon, seeing their relationship as romantic, and then aging them up because you want some way for them to be together. and in that way you’re romanticizing a relationship between the two characters you saw in canon, and that’s not okay”. now i want oyu to pay attention to this part. “in that way you’re romanticizing a relationship between the two characters you saw in canon, and that’s not okay.”
you’re taking characters you saw in canon, and changing them to fit your view in a way that the public would deem okay. You’re taking something you saw in canon, in this case two children who seem at the most mildly puppy lovish (like a play ground crush), and you’re manipulating it so that you can view the canon relationship in a less taboo way. like i said earlier, aging up a character doesnt mean you look at the character in a more adult light. it means you’re attempting to justify to youself and make yourself feel better and safer on the idea of the character having sex. aging a character up doesn’t change the way you view them or their relationships. no matter how much you insist you are smarter than most and you really do view the character as an adult, you dont. thats bull.
now onto some smaller stuff that they didnt because wow. iconic i guess..
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although i usually block out names this is a gross mentality. the entire comment is disgusting. and at the end “i would love to see some more sexy spyro x cynder from you” solidifies it. not to mention that fae/fox is essentially encouraging it. saying they will continue to draw it. meaning they havent learned anything from this experience. youre 23 dude.
and now some abliesm
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“but lolbit you stupid bafoon. they didnt say anything themself. duuuhhh”
yes im aware. here they are saying it themself. 
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ahh.. gotta love that... really gotta hammer in that sparkling personality of theirs.
TD;LR foxdragonlover on deviantart, FaeFierceVulpine on furaffinity and  onefiercefox here on tumblr drew cynder and spyro nsfw art (which classifies as CP) and then defended their art all the while blocking people who called them out for it. they claimed it featured 18 plus characters only after they were called out for it. they then made a post about it essentially crying about it and pinning the blame on those who called them out for it. They are a 23 year old. they’ve also said some abliest stuff and have just generally been nasty.
anyway i cant believe i did this. this post is huge and im so sorry. i didnt intend for it to be that big. i wanted to be as detailed as possible and make sure i touched on everything i could. now its 3 am and im tired. if anything looks wrong tell me and i’ll change it. i may address their comment to me later (the comment in the starting pictures). im outa energy
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some tag game idk
@itsmoonpeaches you tagged me to do this like 3 years ago AND I FINALLY AM, thank you my love xoxo
1. Why did you choose your URL?
because thinking is a dangerous pastime. y’all have seen the posts on this hellsite lmao
2. Any side blogs?
well, this one 😂 i post marvel stuff on @starkravinghazelnoots and @yespleasefandomtrash is where i just rb fandom things (except atla and good omens, which go on this blog)
3. How long have you been on Tumblr?
uhhhh 5 years? guesstimating?
4. Do you have a queue tag?
i sure do, it’s “can i hear a wa-queue” (inspired by “can i hear a wahoo” from good omens lmao)
5. Why did you start your blog in the first place?
i saw screenshots of funny tumblr posts on pinterest and wanted to see them firsthand
6. Why did you choose this icon/pfp?
because i believe in violet parr and incredibles supremacy
7. Why did you choose your header?
it looks very cool 😌🌊
8. What’s your post with the most notes?
this good omens meme
9. How many mutuals do you have?
no idea. 20? 30?
10. How many followers do you have?
it fluctuates lmao but somehow i managed to break 1k during the semester when i was posting essentially nothing
11. How many people do you follow?
a whopping 328
12. Have you ever made a shitpost?
yes. yes i have.
13. How many times do you use Tumblr each day?
during the semester? maybe once every couple of days, if that. during time off? more often, lol
14. Did you ever have a fight/argument with another blog? Who won?
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i don’t engage in discourse like that. the closest i’ve come to “arguing” on here would be responding to negative asks, and even then i delete the ones that are just taking it too far
15. How do you feel about “you need to reblog this" posts?
BESTIE THEY ARE RIDICULOUS. I DON’T “NEED” TO REBLOG ANYTHING. i understand they’re usually well-intentioned, but i curate my own online experience, including what i’m going to rb at any given point.
16. Do you like tag games?
sure do! im terribly at getting around to them, if you couldn’t tell, but they’re usually fun
17. Do you like ask games?
most of them 😂
18. Which or your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?
all of them. i am surrounded by celebrities. hugs and kisses xoxo
19. Do you have a crush on a mutual?
i think ocean and i have been married over a year now, or at least close to it (BABE WHEN’S OUR ANNIVERSARY???)
20. Tags?
if you see this and want to do it, there you go. you have been tagged 😌
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dokidokiliteraturegirls · 7 years ago
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1 day hiatus and some thoughts regarding the last arc.
Man, that was one heck of a ride! Or at least I hope it was, because that was my intention! Before we move on, I want to announce I’ll be taking a day long hiatus, mostly because it would be pretty weird to finish the hyper-dramatic and intense arc I was making and then jump straight back into silly hijinks and shenanigans, so there won’t be an update tomorrow, but there will be one the day after! I’ll also share some thoughts and ideas that went behind the writing of that specific art and ask for some opinions under the cut, so don’t miss it!
I was going to make this post a video but after I heard my recorded voice I was like eeeeeeeeewwwwww. Sorry if I ask you to read too much (I’ll try to keep this text post as concise as possible), but trust me, it’s better than my awful voice and bad attempts at comedy. Trust me.
Anyways, I want to thank all of you!! The last five days have been really intense here in ddlitg with Monika’s Deletion Arc. With the intents and purposes of keeping the events of the story mysterious I purposefully remained mostly silent during this week (mostly because I can’t shut tf up). I know you guys had a lot of questions and it made me kind of sad not being able to answer them to keep up the aura of mystery, but it was also incredibly fun and motivating to see you all coming up with your own theories about how Monika was going to be brought back, how her memories would be installed, etc~ It really made me feel like I succeeded at keeping you guys hooked on the story! As a fanfiction writer, that is a great achievement for me ❤️❤️❤️ On the other hand, some people got really scared. They thought I was going to delete the blog at the end of the time limit, and that Monika would stay dead for good. I’m sorry that I couldn’t elbow you guys and say *pppst! don’t worry. all this tension is temporary. I don’t write tragedies bro. In my stories, even when stuff goes sour, it always ends up ok because I think it gives a good message* because it would spoil all the suspense I was working on so hard to build up.
Secondly, I was also a little scared that I was breaking up the mood that I had set up for the blog. Because of the beautiful messages you marvelous individuals take the time to send little ol’ me, I know many of you see this blog as a palate cleanser for all the f*cked up stuff that happens in DDLC, and I remember people even telling me they recommended the blog to other people who had just finished the game so they could overcome the trauma more easily, as I have set up a fluffy and comfortable atmosphere around my updates. Even when I delve into more serious topics, such as Natsuki’s bullying because of her being trans, I had never written a story arc as tense as this one before (previous multiple-update spanning story arcs were the Natsuri and Sayorika shipping arcs, so....). However, I may not show it because of how fluffy DDLitG is, but I’m a big fan of emotionally intense stories, such as shonen manga, where blood-soaked heroes scream about hope in the eyes of imminent defeat. The kind of stories that keep you glued to the screen with your heart pumping and your blood boiling wondering what is going to happen next, how are our heroes going to overcome the next hurdle (I recommend Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann if you’re into that kind of stuff like I am). However, the stories I write are very different: Doki Doki Literature Girls is about four girls trying to heal from past trauma with the power of mutual support and persistence, ohfuckistaigis is about random stuff happening and out-of-character banter for the sake of whatever joke I can come up with in the 15 minutes I take to make each update, and Literature and Murder is about two seemingly incredibly different characters realizing they’re much more similar than they realized, and growing together as friends while exploring themselves and overcoming their internal struggles ina world that actively works against them (no, really). I really wanted to challenge myself to get out of my comfort zone and write an emotionally intense story arc for DDLitG, as not only it is my story with the biggest and most beautiful audience (I love you guys so much ❤️❤️❤️), but it’s also the one with the biggest potential for those kind of stories. HOWEVER, I’m still scared that I betrayed you guys by writing something different if you put your trust in me to bring you happy fluffy updates every day to help you unwind. Some people were disappointed when the first update in the arc dropped, and that’s understandable, which is receiving your opinion on this is super important for me.
You know, I worked super, SUPER hard on this arc. Like... the hardest I’ve worked on anything ever. I’ve put more woman-hours and effort into making every little thing make sense, fit perfectly with each other, work as a conclusion to a previously established fact, and at the same time be mysterious and interesting in these five updates than the entire rest of the blog. And apparently it paid off!! I received so many wonderful messages, so many theories daily, and so many people saying they cried at the conclusion that it felt like a truly special time in the blog, and an reminder of why I love the power of fiction and being a writer so much ❤️❤️❤️ I want to thank you all again for being with me in this journey, and I hope I can keep bringing you updates that make your hearts go doki doki!!
Now as a fun conclusion I want to share some memes I received that I was too much of a dumbass to remember queueing. I’M SO SORRY I’M REALLY SORRY I WAS SO FOCUSED ON THE UPDATE I FORGOT TO POST THESE I’M SO SORRYYYYYYYYYYY 🙇🙇🙇
Now let’s check them out because they’re the best ❤️
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([email protected] holy shit)
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@retritale I LOVE THIS SO MUCH OMG!!! I kind of wonder what would happen if I’m on the bus or smth and spot someone with a picture of my blog like this one as a wallpaper. I would probably lose my shit right there and then.
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We actually received this one today, but I’m posting it here because 1. it’s hilarious and b. I don’t want people freaking out thinking Monika got deleted again.
And finally, and extremely importantly... remember that thing about removing Monika from the Icon and Banner that was the best idea ever because it was so meta and it paralleled beautifully with how Sayori disappeared from the title screen of DDLC in the 2nd run and was so much fun because more and more people discovered it and I literally received messages about people freaking out because they had just discovered it every day? I want to thank this anon for that! It was entirely their idea:
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I read that messages as I was having breakfast and literally stopped eating to make the new pictures because the idea was so genius. I really wanted to IM this person to thank them personally but... you know. Anon. So I’m posting it here! Thanks buddy, you made the whole experience seem all the more real ❤️
Once again, I can’t thank you enough for your wonderful messages, sending your theories, sending me shit because you didn’t agree with my decision, everything, the comments you put on posts, the tags you put on the reblogs, everything. You’re seriously the best fanbase a writer could ask for ❤️❤️❤️
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Questions
Unanswered questions that I wish I would have asked him and gotten straightforward answers to...  Most of these are things I’m struggling with or have struggled with in the past but didn’t approach him about, and I may include the explanations I’ve come up with for them since I don’t have his input on any of it.
(This blog may have been a bit brutal, but I don’t think you can argue with me being justified in the way I felt about things.)
1.  Why did you insist on continuing to go out on dates with me and push for me to say yes when you asked me to be your girlfriend?  You knew you didn’t want to stay in the area you were living in when we went out for the first time, and I was 100% me and you saw what my personality and attitude were like and must have known that it wasn’t what you really wanted...
2.  Why didn’t you say “I love you” when you felt it the first time?  And then afterward, when I said it first, why didn’t you say it back?
3.  When you flew me out to see you, why didn’t you just take the last day off work as well?  I knew we wouldn’t have had 24 hours together but 6-8 hours together at home relaxing and enjoying each other before I had to leave would have been worth taking a day off, right?
4.  When I wanted to fly myself back out to see you again after that, why didn’t you want me to?
5.  Was the breakup text intended to try and hurt me?  And why couldn’t you preface it with literally any type of explanation or attempt at some type of discourse before you jumped right into the “we need to move on”
6.  I know you know what racial slur I’m talking about in the post below- why did you use it that time?  Do you still use it?
7.  Why did you handle that parking lot situation with the two older ladies the way that you did?  Why did you speak to them the way that you did? You honestly scared me when you behaved like that and I’d never seen that side of you... You’re not exactly very personable with other people, but you were never downright ugly and aggressive toward them like you were that day.
8.  Did you ever intend to settle down in one place and have the type of job that wouldn’t involve constant travel and being away?
9.  Why didn’t you just wait until January to tell me that you’re seeing someone else?  I suppose no time is a good time to do what you did, the way you did it... but anyone who knows me knows that I celebrate Christmas for days after.  But then again, maybe you don’t really know me.
10.  When you apologized last month and gave that whole “you’re an amazing person” spiel, were you already seeing this new person?  Was any of that truly, honestly for me?
11.  After our recent conversations and opening up more, did you have any intention of actually trying to fix things between us to maintain some type of relationship?
12.  When your parents visited you and I was there for the weekend- did they know I was going to be there?  When you left me in the apartment and ran out to talk to them, I got the feeling that you were springing me on them... and it was a little awkward at first before we started talking, but initially I got the vibe that they were not expecting to see anyone but you.
13.  I was a bridesmaid in a friend’s wedding and I invited you to go with me but you said you had to work (you had told me that the work thing you had was the following weekend) did you really have to work that weekend or were you just trying to get out of going to the wedding?  I thought you just didn’t want to go and I since I was only going because I had to, I didn’t push to ask.  I just figured you’d mixed up the dates or didn’t and it wasn’t worth pursuing, so I didn’t.
14.  During our first year together, when I was at your place, I took some stupid video of me trying to hide in the closet and scare you, it wasn’t anything of real consequence, but I left my phone and when I got out of the shower the video was deleted from my phone. We were the only people in the apartment. Did you delete it?
15.  Why did you behave the way you did over the Hulu account?  To be honest, that was my breaking point.  For you to insult me and throw in my face that I was inconsiderate, and then to treat me like an ignorant child- that was totally uncalled for.  My mistake for assuming that since you’re using my streaming service, I could let my brother use the one you’d given me the password to (I mistook that login as a “gift” years ago when you sent it to me and told me it was so I could watch Mindy Project.)  You and I had been together for 5 years and I gave it to one of the people I’m closest to in the world and I wasn’t handing it out to strangers willy nilly.  And then it apparently wasn’t even an issue that he was using it- you’d just wanted me to ask your permission first- which is totally fine.   BUT you could have easily said, “hey is ----- using my hulu?” “yeah” “oh, well that’s fine, but do you mind checking in with me first from now on because some of these accounts have passwords I don’t want shared with anyone but you” or “i actually hadn’t planned to share it with anyone but you, could you just give him a heads up and I’ll update the password” and it would have accomplished the EXACT SAME THING without being super condescending and offensive.  Granted that may have been what you were trying to do- and it really, really feels like that’s what you were trying to do.  All of my responses to you that night were intended to be sarcastic and facetious - as was my apology- but you took it literally and thought I was apologizing like that? And when I said I was sorry for future screw ups and you said “that’s alright because it won’t happen again, right” and you threw a winky face in there or something.  Holy fuck, like- did you seriously think I was metaphorically lying on the ground groveling at your feet begging for forgiveness because of MY screw ups?  I mean, I guess that’s what you thought of me as a person- just a pushover- and you thought you were better than me.  My mistake was doing things the way other people in long term relationships do things- share information, talk about important things, share personal details.  I think I held your phone a handful of times when you handed it to me to pick music while we were driving, and even then I was scared to touch anything that may exit into another screen that you wouldn’t want me to see or something.  I didn’t need to know all of your deep dark secrets and every detail about your life- but I see couples hand each other phones to answer a call or reply to a text or find something for them, or just to use and I can’t imagine that ever having been you and me.  You were just too closed off in that area- and others- and I didn’t see that wall breaking down for me... ever.  It was so hard being with someone and feeling that way, ------.  Also- when I did get upset and go off about it, you just shut down and didn’t respond.  The one time I actually vocalize what I’m feeling and you shut down and shut it out.  All of the times I mention that I didn’t tell you something or I didn’t bother saying anything-- THIS is the response you confirmed I would have received if I tried to touch on any of those topics with you.  Fight back, argue it out with me, fucking do something!  That’s all a part of the communication we needed to experience that we never did.  It was just a lot of holding things in.  And then expecting me to know what you were feeling.
16.  If I told you I wanted to wait until we were in love to do anything physically intimate- would you have stayed in a relationship with  me?  Like based on an emotional connection, my personality, me as a person?  I never would have done what I did as early on as I did if I didn’t think you were someone who would respect me and who I’d be able to trust and let myself be vulnerable with.  And you were, for a few months.
17.  I broke one of my rules about “off the table” stuff- something you had wanted- and after it didn’t pan out ideally, I found myself apologizing to you (why the hell did I apologize??) and you didn’t say ANYTHING.  You didn’t say it was okay or that I shouldn’t apologize or anything!  In the moment I wasn’t thinking about it, but looking back on it- what???  My question in this is- do you think I should have apologized? Do you think you deserved the apology I gave you for that?
18.  You never apologized to me for anything during our relationship unless you were saying “I’m sorry” in response to me saying something like “I’m having a bad day” (this is just an example- but it was legit trivial stuff- so that wasn’t an actual apology- just like an “I’m sorry you aren’t feeling well” type of sorry.)  You know there were times when we needed to apologize to each other- probably quite a few over the course of 5 years.  I was always willing to do that- why weren’t you?  Did you think I didn’t deserve any apology ever?
19.  You thought I was inconsiderate in sharing a streaming service password and you were clearly not okay with it.  Essentially I did something with a thing that was linked to you without asking you first or talking to you about it.  Okay, well, this is one thing that I never got to talk to you about because after it happened, there was really no ideal time to bring it up, and I was new to it and didn’t want to seem, for lack of a better term, immature and inexperienced, so I just kind of went with the flow of things and was too scared (that you’d get annoyed or make me feel like it was ridiculous that I was asking) to ask you to do things differently from that point on- so here it is.  Our first time.  I asked you if you had protection, you did, you were putting it on and then... did you simply decide not to?  You did not say anything.  I figured it out, obviously, after it had already been done, but why would you think that was okay?  I was not okay with it, but what do I do?  Finish up my first time with an argument and storm out and drive home because the guy I finally let in completely just betrayed my trust right from the jump?  It’s my fault for just going along with it and letting you think that was acceptable and then just going along with it every time after that as if it was fine. (And after a certain point it was, but for the first bit, it was all new and not as comfortable as it was later as we got deeper into the relationship.)  I’ll just, embarrassingly, attribute that to my naivety and desire to please my new boyfriend.  The times after are on me, but the first time is on you.  I just don’t even have anything else to go along with this one.  But I’d like to point out that I was the only one using BC and I was the only one who had to suffer through multiple scares- to which you just texted, it’ll be fine we’ll figure it out, like I was being over dramatic about it.
20.  When we talked recently, about a toy. You asked if I noticed.  I did not notice.  Now that I know, I’m feel super embarrassed about it and really insecure in myself.  No question here.
  21.  You said that part of the reason things fell apart was that you didn’t see us being physically together in the same place- which makes total sense- but why weren’t you more eager about trying to plan visits?  In the later bit of it, you were coming here- but I stopped trying to come visit you because it always seemed like you were working, or you were on call, or if I drove there to see you and you got called in, you’d have to go and then I would have just wasted a lot of time and effort to sit in your empty apartment alone.  And if you’d taken time off and were still called in, I knew you’d pick going into work (even if you didn’t have to) over spending time with me there.  So I knew if you drove here- you’d be physically unable to make it into work and I’d actually have the entire time with you.  The last time you came, I remember stopping by to pick up an order from Kohl’s and then to check for my post office package on the way to the hotel.  You jokingly teased me about taking forever and said “why are you like this” and it’s something I’ve thought about.  When you would come into town, you’d check in, let me know, I’d meet you, we may take a brief nap, do stuff, shower, dinner, then back for TV and sleep.  That’s pretty much the rundown of our first night, yes?  BUT, I know that once we’ve been apart for a while (which was basically every time lately) you would be excited to see me, I’d feel loved and wanted, but as the hours passed, that would kind of taper off and we’d just be two people in a room until we were doing things.  When you came in the last time, I knew I had to do those things and knew you wouldn’t want to come with me to do them- when we do go to stores, you’ll be there, but you’ll walk off as if you want nothing to do with what’s going on and then I’ll do my stuff and have to track you down.  It’s not a fun feeling to have that dynamic instead of the “cute bf and gf shopping together and making a mundane activity a fun one” dynamic.  (I honestly just wanted to do basic and simple shit like that with you- running errands, doing grocery shopping, doing things that every couple does.) It was really half and half with that- like half of the time I felt like you didn’t want to be seen with me, but then the other half of the time- you’d hold my hand to walk and it would be fine.  I never went in first to try and hold your hand because of this.  I didn’t know which of the two situations I’d be going in on and didn’t want to be embarrassed if you weren’t feeling the hand holding.  Same with sex- same with any type of intimacy- same with any type of physical affection.  I didn’t know if you’d want any of it, so I let you determine when things were going to happen.  That meant not as many hugs or kisses as I wanted, but hey.  When you’d ask me where I wanted to eat, I always wanted you to choose because I knew that my choices would most likely not be your preference and that you’d not be happy about it if you weren’t enjoying your food and it was easier to just let you choose and then you could go somewhere you actually wanted to be.  I was fine with basically anywhere as long as it was with you.  And I stopped off at Kohl’s first because I’d just ordered a couple new outfits that I was excited about wearing out with you- for you.  I just wanted to feel pretty when I was going out with you and I wanted you to think I was pretty.  I figured that if I got in a little bit later, then the excitement wouldn’t wear off as quickly when we were finally together.
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studentdiaries-x · 4 years ago
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habits to get me through the day.
I already mentioned in my recent blog that, being the spontaneous person that I am, I could not stick to routines. I am still aware though, that I still need to incorporate some healthy habits in my daily life that could help me function well through motivation and relief. I told myself to do the following every day, but not necessarily in a particular order. My goal to do most in the list, if not all. I did not want to pressure myself into following a strict routine, because I've failed at that a lot of times. So, I decided to take it easy— just little by little.  Below are 5 of the habits that I chose because I believed it will help me get through the struggles of online class.
1. Taking a bath before doing my tasks for the day
Don't get me wrong, I do take a bath every day. The thing about bathing is that it gives me a sense of motivation, giving me a kind of "boost" to get through the day. I see a lot of difference in my mood if I compare doing tasks prior to taking a bath, and doing them after I take a bath. The former makes me demotivated and lazy, while the latter refreshes me and gives me the idea that I already did something to 'progress' my day. I find this habit as the easiest to incorporate.
2.  Reading a self-help book
This one helps me to just stop and rest, while still being productive in a way. When holding my phone, I do my best to open my eBook reader app instead of aimlessly scrolling through Facebook and Instagram. These eBooks enables me to be introspective and intentional in dealing with life. At the same time, it expands my vocabulary. Some books that I've finished reading are: "Limitless" and "Heart Detox", both by Bo Sanchez, and "Unfck Yourself" by John Bishop. As of now, I'm close to finishing "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fck" by Mark Manson.
3. Drinking tea
Yes, I know. It sounds like a "Tita" or even "Lola" habit, right? That's exactly how I feel every time I drink tea. I feel like a productive, responsible, mature type of person. Emphasis on the "feel". I drink green tea, with honey and a squeeze of lemon. This makes me relax and destress, particularly when I have too much going on at the moment and I feel like breaking down but I have to keep going because there are other tasks to finish. That's right, it's my type of drug, my stimulant.
4. Journaling/Blogging
I had long wanted to journal regularly. The blogging part though, is one that interested me just very recently. 2 weeks ago, our Creative Non-Fiction course required us to write a memoir of our chosen topic, and I wrote about my passion. For someone who has a lot going on in her mind, writing becomes therapeutic. Now that I think of it, I really loved to tweet about my thoughts on Twitter especially about my self-reflections and sudden realizations, as well as my opinions on certain matters that I felt the need to share. I guess that's why I got so addicted to it— it gave me a voice and an audience. This platform, however, led me to an unhealthy habit of oversharing unnecessary events about me, because I thought of it as a diary or my brain dump. It made me feel vulnerable and exposed, so I deleted my account. Now, I'm looking forward to putting all my raw, unfiltered thoughts in a journal, where it is safe and no one can see it as a way to take advantage of my vulnerability, while my more "refined", organized thoughts will go to my blog.
5. Taking a walk outside with my little sister
My little sister has always been my little ray of sunshine— although sometimes, her demands also stresses me out. Whenever I feel exhausted, I play with her. It's not just me boasting, but I am her favorite person in the house. I'm even close to thinking that she thinks of me as a playmate her age rather than a sister 15 years older than her, because I join her dancing to nursery rhymes and Blackpink videos, at the same time, doing pretend play with her. I'm also the only one she can trick into going outside for a walk (tbh, my family isn't really the physically active type— most of them don't enjoy exercise). With her being my happy pill, I get a reason to go outside because I like to let her to experience playing outdoors, just like how I did during my childhood. This is also one simple way to add some physical movement in my routine, because I can't seem to have the energy to workout.
My progress
I have quite mastered habit #1, taking a bath before doing my tasks. Also, I'm getting used to habit #2 reading a self-help book and habit #3 drinking tea. I've already mastered these before too, but got lost again after classes started, so I'm trying to bring it back to my routine. Habit #4 Journaling/Blogging and habit #5 taking a walk is still difficult for me to do consistently, I assume because it requires a certain amount of time and energy. I have to do it intentionally, or else, I'm going nowhere. I guess that's my problem, because I often wait for me to be "in the mood" before I start working on something, especially if the tasks need me to think deliberately or exert energy in physical movement.
For the meantime, I will focus on turning these five activities into daily habits. I will keep on making baby steps until I reach a point where I can finally stick to a routine. Given this, I will do my best to journal and blog about my progress! I reckon this blog will be my pledge to keep getting better day by day. I hope the people like me who are reading this can get the motivation to go forward, too. Let's get this!
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amourete-blog1 · 7 years ago
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(( “hey, so about your total breakdown x2 combo yesterday.”
tagging: @hereticalsym69ls @valorousimperial @roseredmutant @trolljacksparrow
bolded bits are corvin (timeline psiioniic) speaking/acting.
begin log:
[2017-07-22 8:31:41 PM] FELIDE: You've decided you really hate sleeping alone.
Two paper cats from your sylladex sit on the table beside your bed. Inside are Xanthe's palmhusk and husktop - which, inevitably, you'll be giving back to him today. You stare at them for a good long while before you decide to get up, pick them up, and check your own palmhusk. Nadaya wants to know what's up - you tell him as much as you know, which really isn't much.
You'll make breakfast for yourself, unbraid your hair while tea is brewing, and when finally you'd consider yourself ready to start the night, you go looking for Xanthe. The moment of truth has arrived, motherfucker.
[2017-07-22 8:42:05 PM] XANTHE: Truth is an illusion designed to lead you into a state of complacency. You've spent the day with Corvin, mostly just being a stupid wreck over things you wish would stop being things. The extent of any discussion with him thus far was him asking what happened and you trying to explain the best you could, given what you don't want to talk about. He recognizes that it's about That Thing you haven't been ready to really say anything on. You honestly wish you could tell your own moirail more, but.... A little at a time over a long period is the best you've been managing so far. He still remains largely in the dark. Though, perhaps less so than anyone else.
Since you can't talk about it, the two of you have since made a small pillow fort and have been watching viewtube videos of tiny foods and crafts. You're not great by any means, but you are at least... leveled out. Something like that. Mostly you feel that bone-deep exhaustion. Leaning against Corvin has been decent grounding for you in the meanwhile.
Corvin hasn't slept at all, as usual, and you don't know if you even really got any sleep. The time all sort of bled together and before you knew it, the sun had set already. When Felide  finds you both in your overly simple and bare bones fort, you don't look at her right away. Zoning out has been good to you and you like doing it. Corvin gives you a small nudge though, so you look up at her.
"Hey."
[2017-07-22 8:51:09 PM] FELIDE: You don't frown, but you definitely don't smile. "Hey." You pause, weigh your options, and then turn right back around, tossing a "hold that thought" over your shoulder.
When you return, you have a baby-plate of omlette and a mug of tea for each of them. You, of course, sit on the coffee table, because where else would you sit? This is you we're talking about.
"I'm going to take a wild guess and say neither of you are well-rested."
[2017-07-22 8:57:44 PM | Edited 9:11:00 PM] XANTHE: Corvin just about greedily accepts the offered breakfast and snorts, "Am I ever?"
While he immediately digs into his omelette, you sort of shy away from eating and take to sipping your mug of tea. In response to her question you simply shrug. You aren't well rested, but you aren't feeling like death just yet. You're sure she has no intention of letting last day go, regardless. She certainly doesn't look it.
Corvin takes a break between inhaling his food long enough to say, "Taking a wild guess that you're not all that well rested either."
[2017-07-22 9:01:04 PM] FELIDE: "Better than either of you." You have a bit of a smile to that one - if you were next to him, you probably would have elbowed him. "So, today will probably be a pretty calm day. I don't have work, so I'll be here..." You make a waving motion with one hand. "To help or whatever." You're not sure if Xanthe's ready for company. He certainly doesn't look it.
"Anyway." NOW the shit begins. You lean forward and cross your arms, resting them on your knees. "Let's talk about what we're going to do to make sure this doesn't happen again."
[2017-07-22 9:10:42 PM] XANTHE: You frown at that and just kind of huddle in on yourself around your mug. "Delete my blog and hide in the mountains for the rest of my life."
Corvin puts his empty plate down and flicks your forehead. "I think the bigger issue is ending this running away business. You know that shit isn't helping you."
You make an indignant whining noise and pout. "Being a mountain hermit is a perfectly valid option."
"Oh yeah, a perfectly shitty option."
[2017-07-22 9:15:55 PM] FELIDE: You take a deep breath and let it out. When you open your eyes again, you level them at him, warm green flickering with a soft fire. "No, I'm done playing games Xanthe. I'm done even entertaining games. I know humor helps you, but we cannot afford to do this anymore - we all just saw what happens when we let this fall by the wayside. I am done."
You take out one of the two paper cats, holding it between your fingers. "I want to know that when I give this back to you, you won't send yourself straight back into a panic - and no, you don't get to tell me it was all him, you put yourself back into that situation. That's a problem.
"We need to set up something, some kind of security system, so that when this happens again - when, not if, because we all know somehow it will - you won't do that. It's not good for you, and you aren't worrying about just yourself anymore. We talked about having a family. We both have several partners. If you won't do this for your own self-sabotaging ass, you need to do this for them, your clade present and future. So are you ready to talk?"
[2017-07-22 9:28:35 PM] XANTHE: Your frown becomes a grimace and you grit your teeth. Rather than look at Felide or Corvin, you stare down into your tea. You open your mouth to say something, but the words you might have said just die in your mouth before they can be heard. You don't even know what you would say. You don't know what to say. How do you come up with anything, explain anything, without talking about that? How do you work out a plan like she wants without it? You don't know and it scares you to think she really wants you to talk about it.
You chew nervously at the corner of your lip. The only thing you can think to say is a quiet, "I'm sorry."
[2017-07-22 9:35:54 PM] FELIDE: Okay, business approach is causing upset. Away goes the little paper cat. You relax your stance, roll back your shoulders and try again.
"It's okay. I don't want to say it's okay, but it is, and I'm not holding it against you - it's just that you... kind of scared the shit out of me." Your hands rest in your lap, fingers knit together. "... You got so upset. I don't know if I can tell you what it feels like, to see you destroy yourself and know I can't stop you, and to watch you do it anyway no matter what I say or try to plead. I watched you from the minute you started shaking and you know I would go through hell and back for you, in a heartbeat I really would, but this was so... avoidable."
You sigh, looking down. "Listen: Val was a jerk. He deserved you chewing him out over his insistence. I don't really care what happens between you, because although I care about you both, if talking to him really makes you that upset then no, I'm not going to make you. I mean I don't think you should keep running away from your problems because it really is doing you more harm than good, but I can't make you stop. You have to choose to stop that, and that's a conversation for another time. All I want right now is to know if you are going to run away, you'll at least stay away. That if you start running into problems like that, you'll disengage and you won't re-engage when you know this is going to happen." You look back up at him. "You knew this was going to happen, didn't you?"
[2017-07-22 9:48:47 PM | Edited 9:49:44 PM] XANTHE: Your grimace softens, but your eyes remain lidded. She isn't wrong. You know she isn't. Guilt wells in your chest knowing you worried her yet again. "... Yeah. I just. I tried staying away, but he kept talking to me. He persisted so I thought. Maybe I could make him stop, but. That just wasn't working out."
You start to frown again, not simply upset, but now a bit annoyed. "Even at the party. He couldn't just leave me alone. No, he had to insist I stick around and make nice for Tyfora's sake like she isn't an adult who can handle two people not being in the same vicinity. It's like no amount of just telling him no, showing flat out disinterest, or even being a jerk can tell him to back off."
Your fingers start to tighten around your mug. It takes Corvin resting his hand on your shoulder to relax them before you potentially break it.
Instead of that, you sigh and put your head down. "I can't. I just can't. I can't even stop myself from reacting."
[2017-07-22 9:53:29 PM] FELIDE: "Can you try to make an effort to listen to us, then? Can we set something up so one of us can help you?" He's talking - that's good - but your tone is still one of worry and pleading. "I love you, but you're so stubborn, and I can't stand up to you on my own. I don't think anyone could, and it's both a blessing and a curse. I don't know how to get through to you when you're like that."
[2017-07-22 10:03:06 PM | Edited 10:03:50 PM] XANTHE: Corvin thinks that Felide not being able to stand up to Xanthe is rubbish. She should just drop kick him when necessary.
He squeezes Xanthe's shoulder a bit and presses his forehead to Xanthe. "I know you were alone a long time. But you don't have to deal with this by yourself anymore. We're right here."
You still feel the weight of guilt, but now your chest feels tight. Hearing Felide plead like that... You hate that you made her do it. This happening was your own fault. You did it to yourself and you did it to them. They didn't deserve that.
So you take a deep breath and exhale, lifting your head with your eyes shut. "Okay. Yes."
It would certainly be an effort. But you're making a promise now. And you keep your promises.
[2017-07-22 11:43:11 PM] FELIDE: You visibly relax. It's easier to breathe - the weight in your chest lifts at his words, and you can sit a little straighter. "Thank you."
You give him a little smile, and begin the process of unfolding one of the paper cats for him. It takes a careful hand.
"I want to help you. I don't know what's going on, and although I wish sometimes I did, I'm holding to my promise: I won't push you. So... Thank you for helping me help you." When his palmhusk pops out of the card, you move on to his husktop, then hold both out to him.
"Nadaya asked about you today. Lil asked yesterday. They both hope you're alright."
[12:05:06 AM] XANTHE: You open your eyes and look up at her. You wish you could be better. You wish you didn't have to put her through this. She doesn't need to be dealing with all your baggage. Felide's smile both warms and hurts your heart.
You wish you could tell her. You wish you weren't so afraid and ashamed of it. All you can do is nod and accept your things back when she offers them. "I see.... Thank you."
You suppose you will have to contact the both of them and let them know you're okay.
Well. Okay enough. You're not dying any time soon at least.
[12:07:10 AM] FELIDE: "Hey, babe?" You lean in just a little, to catch his glance before he looks away. You give him a bigger, more genuine smile. "I love you."
[12:09:01 AM] XANTHE: Your stomach does a little flip and you smile back. "I love you, too."
You lean in closer to her to gently bump your forehead against hers.
[12:09:36 AM] FELIDE: Bump! You purr. "Can I kiss you?"
[12:10:40 AM] XANTHE: "Yes." She can kiss you no matter how awful you ever get. You couldn't possibly trust anyone more than you trust Felide.
[12:11:24 AM] FELIDE: ! Keeeess! You smewch that boy. "Love of my life, heart of my heart. Gay little fuck."
[12:[12:23 AM] XANTHE: Corvin makes exaggerated gagging noises in the background.
[12:[12:29 AM] FELIDE: You flip him off.
[12:14:04 AM] XANTHE: You swat him where you can reach him while kissing her back. "You're pretty gay yourself, chaton. My moon and stars."
[12:15:42 AM] FELIDE: You give Xanthe a little shove of his own. "Go text your partners. I told them I'd check on you, so now you get to beat me to answering them. Once-in-a-lifetime chance, take it or leave it!"
[12:19:41 AM] XANTHE: "Okay okay! Whatever you say, boss lady." You let her shove lead you back into leaning against Corvin. Devices in hand and feeling a little less sick, you put those down so you can reach for your set aside omellette.
And find your plate is totally empty.
"Corvin!"
"What? You weren't eating it."
[12:20:35 AM] FELIDE: You laugh. God, that feels good. "I'll get you more. Orrr." You make a little ;3c face, wink and "paw" included. "You could duck into the kitchen with me to get it?"
[12:23:54 AM] XANTHE: You contemplate this.... And before Corvin says anything you plant your entire palm of your hand on his face. "Yeah, I can do that."
Time to get up and get food with Felide. And possibly some sort of shenanigans, since that Look is never innocent.
[12:25:22 AM] FELIDE: Oh there will DEFINITELY be shenanigans. Super lovey shenanigans, but nothing overtly sexual, because it's still early and you really just want to kiss him out of view of immature wrigglers (Corvin).
[12:26:57 AM] XANTHE: Kissing you can do. This is entirely possible. Corvin will still get up and follow the two of you to the kitchen ANYWAY because he's rude like that.
Mostly so he can insult the hot leaf juice and get a mug of the superior hot bean juice before he leaves.
[12:27:31 AM] FELIDE: Well in THAT case you're going to be as obnoxious about it as you possibly can. Fuck you, Corvin, you had your chance.
[12:28:59 AM] XANTHE: Ah yes, obnoxious smoochfests. You're not complaining.
You're making gross faces and noises while your bean juice brews though. Just because you can and what's Felide gonna do about it? Nothing is what. She's tiny and can do nothing to stop your theatrical displays of disgust.
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yeonchi · 6 years ago
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Generic Name, Generic Update
Some of you may be wondering why the Ecchi Waifu Network hasn’t been deleted by now. I stated that I would hold off on doing so until after the third stage of the protest (to be announced, will reblog when details come), but even then, I’m beginning to have second thoughts on my decision.
Firstly, the tag links in the archived pages actually link back to the relevant tag page on the blog, not a collection of posts in the archive with that tag, so they are counterproductive. There may also be some links on the main Waifu Network that lead to some posts on the Ecchi Waifu Network, so I don’t want to break them unless absolutely necessary (then again, those posts have likely become irrelevant, so that’s a moot point).
Secondly, believe it or not, there is still a little bit of activity happening on there following the NSFW ban, namely people liking some posts that weren’t flagged as such. If people find that blog, whether through the posts or reblogs. I still hope for the main Waifu Network to get some recognition, since I’ve put the link for it in the Ecchi Waifu Network’s blog description.
Thirdly, the blog hasn’t been marked as explicit; even if I did, I’m kind of glad I removed that setting. You might agree that the content on there isn’t NSFW enough to be considered “explicit”, even if Tumblr’s definition of “female-presenting nipples is a bit silly”.
As far as I know, Tumblr are only preventing explicit blogs from being viewed by anyone (other than their owners), not deleting them altogether. Even though I’m not a fan of this method, I should give them credit that they weren’t brought out by Facebook and gone the way of the zucc (at which point I would’ve deleted the Ecchi Waifu Network straight away). If the Ecchi Waifu Network does get hidden (at this point it’s no longer a matter of if, but when), then chances are that I will be deleting it. I have no intention of appealing the flagged posts (or blog if the inevitable happens) because I have no ground to stand on for them.
The prospect of reversing the NSFW ban is pretty much a bygone thought at this point, but there is a final hope I’m going to try, which is namely the third stage of the protest that I mentioned. This will be a week-long log off that is currently being planned for 1-8 February. In conjunction to this, they are also planning on mass tweeting official figures related to this and leaving negative reviews on the app stores just as they did in the second stage (I didn’t participate in it because I don’t use Twitter anymore). Once again, I’ll reblog the details when they come out.
So how have things gone for me following the NSFW ban, apart from all the stock taking I did? Believe it or not, a porn bot followed me (on this account, maybe the Waifu Network as well) in the past few days. Don’t bother looking for it because it’s already deleted, but from what I can recall, it had image posts with a linked description saying “Gay Porn” or something. No dicks were seen in the images, but I only looked at the blog for a second when I first saw it and only found out it was deleted when I tried to check a second time.
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Some people were saying that the porn bots were using SFW content to conceal themselves, so I’m not surprised if that’s the way they are going. I don’t know if the bot owner deleted the account or Tumblr did, but if it were the latter, I’d probably give them props for doing it, even if they were prompted to by the reports.
Every now and then, I check my followers on here and the Waifu Network and block those that post pornography, bots or not (though admittedly, I’m a bit easy on those who post/reblog anime fanart, ecchi or hentai). I’ve blocked quite a few of those blogs and I’m not surprised if they were affected by the NSFW ban. The reason why I do this is because these two blogs are intended to be for a general audience and I don’t really like the sound of NSFW blogs following me.
When I made my last post on the Ecchi Waifu Network before the NSFW ban, I had 220 posts backed up. The number of posts has now dropped to 151 since the posts with “female-presenting nipples” were hidden (for the record, the main Waifu Network had 673 posts just before the NSFW ban; excluding the posts I made after it, that number is down to 672, so it wasn’t a big loss). Some posts were rightly flagged for having said content, while some were wrongly flagged as there was little to no nipple exposure at all. Ironically, there were a couple of posts with nipples that weren’t flagged, which just goes to show how flawed their content flagging system is.
Like I said in my 2018 review post, I don’t really have any plans for new segments; I’ll just be posting random stuff when I feel like it, just like the old times when I first joined Tumblr. The backup archive of the Ecchi Waifu Network is also available from here.
Just a side note before I finish this post. As with other issues like English dubs and the gender of the Thirteenth Doctor in Doctor Who, the NSFW ban has become another one of those issues where supporters for change are derided by trolls, opinion-neutrals or people in support of those moves. Sure, you can’t please everyone, but these people, who don’t support both sides getting a fair deal, sound like they are proud of cucking the people that are disadvantaged as a result of those changes.
This is a thing I learnt after about four-and-a-half years of ranting about English dubs; to big companies who provide non-consumable goods and services (including video games or social media), you are not the customer, you are the product. Like politicians, companies can do whatever they want to their services if it means they can spend less money or make more money. They could care less about the opinions of the “minority” because it’s not the “majority” that has those opinions. You’ll probably be feeling the same way when a company does something you disagree with. The more you oppose or troll anyone that has opposing opinions to a company’s proposed change, the more it will come back to bite you when they eventually turn on you.
In other words, Tumblr couldn’t care less about us if it means they can still earn money. If you think that people like us, who oppose the NSFW ban and/or support the log off protest, are wasting their time, then don’t blame us if Tumblr decides to close down. People are saying that Tumblr is dead because of the NSFW ban; don’t be a part of the problem if it actually dies.
UPDATE - 15 January 2019: Tumblr has now given us a section where we can review the posts that have been flagged on our blogs. Well, at least that’s one thing they listened to their users for. There was only one post that was flagged on the Waifu Network, so I’ve decided to appeal that, along with a few posts on the Ecchi Waifu Network that don’t have “female-presenting nipples”.
UPDATE - 17 January 2019: All appealed posts have been restored. My numbers are back to normal now, so maybe that was a bug on their end.
UPDATE - 19 January 2019: As mentioned, here are the details for the third stage of the protest!
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adonis-koo · 3 years ago
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oh my goodness!!! Thank u sm for the tag @wearenot7withu 🥺🥺 it takes me awhile to see these but I always try my best to do them!!! Edit: this somehow got posted before I could finish so bare with me 😭
1. Why did you choose your url?
Adonis is the Greek god of beauty, he was so beautiful that Aphrodite and Persephone were both smitten with him, an agreement was made between the two Goddess’s that Adonis would spend a third of the year with Aphrodite and another third of his year with Persephone, the last third with his own free will. Jungkook is probably the most beautiful man I have EVER seen in my life, both in looks and personality, so if I ever associate him with a Greek god, it’s Adonis, hence my url (that and how everyone would probably fight to the death to be with this man and same tbh)
2. Any sideblogs? If you have them name them and why you have them?
The only side blog I have that is active would be @miss-ficrecs and it’s dedicated to reblogging and reviewing fics, anything that gets reblogged on there gets reblogged onto here so more people can see it!
3. How long have you been on tumblr?
If we ignore account wise I’ve been here for like 8 years now 😭 I created my first account when I was a young impressionable 13 year old and it was Supernatural stan account 🤢 obviously deleted for good reason
4. Do you have a queue tag?
I don’t! I’ve attempted to have a queue tag before but I just don’t use the queue option enough for it to be useful for me!
5. Why did you start your blog in the first place?
I’ve been writing fanfiction for over half my life now and I had started on a plethora of other platforms before Tumblr and had grown out of most other websites. I originally started this blog as just a place for me to explore BTS (as I was still relatively new to the fandom) but had intentions of using it to write if I had the desire to get back into again (I had taken a break at the time but given what type of blog I am we see what happened)
6. Why did you choose your icon?
I feel like it’s pretty well known on my blog but I practice witchcraft, so I saw these cute little witch icons and thought it was fitting! I sometimes use filters and stickers so it goes which each theme I’m using but it pretty much stays the same no matter how much else I change on my blog
7. Why did you choose your header?
Much like last question the theme I’ve been attempting to keep up with is the wheel of the year! So last major pagan holiday was Ostara which is the beginning of spring and is typically associated with planting and flowers blooming, hence my header was in theme of flowers (as growing flowers was part of my celebration for Ostara)
8. What’s your post with the most notes?
Ummm I could be wrong but I’ll take a guess and say it would be my writing: sate! It’s close to 4K and I’m pretty shocked to this day, it was my first ‘longer’ fic I had wrote that was originally going to be a oneshot but because it was so popular I decided to just make a whole verse for it with all the other members!
9. How many mutuals do you have?
I can think of 5 off the top of my head but I think I have around 8-10 mutuals and I love every single one of them 🥺
11. How many people do you follow?
Somewhere around 130 I believe!
12. Have you ever made a shitpost?
I have actually lmaooo but those were back in my early days of using this app
13. How often do you use tumblr each day?
I mean it depends on the definition of using lmfao, I check tumblr fairly frequently but I don’t actually reblog of anything like that except maybe once a day?
14. Did you have a fight/argument with another blog once? Who won?
Noooo hahaha, I tend to keep to myself on tumblr since it’s mainly my outlet for just writing or occasionally venting
15. How do you feel about “you need to reblog this” posts?
I feel like they’re extremely redundant on tumblr as a whole, “you need to reblog this” posts are typically filled with information that most people who use tumblr already know and therefore I feel like it’s not really serving a purpose for anyone other then being used as a guilt tactic for reblogs, hence why you probably don’t see them that often on my blog
16. Do you like tag games?
I love them!!! I just ummm 😣 often forget that I get tagged in them, or I start on them and never finish and they get buried in my drafts, so please tag me if you think of them and I’ll try my absolute best to get around to it!
17. Do you like ask games?
Even better!!! 😫 especially if they’re for stories
18. Which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?
Hahahah oh god like all of them?? They’re all such incredible writers and they’re some of the ones who I uses to read and inspired me to start writing on here!
19. Do I have a crush on a mutual?
Not any actually crushes BUT id platonically marry all of them 🙇‍♀️
20. Tags?
!!! @sweetbunnykook @rmsbicycle @jungkookiebus @fortunexkookie
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729renegades · 5 years ago
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LESSON ON TIME – PART 1
“Breaking the time barrier”
My “breaking the time barrier” system consists of 4 different steps. Firstly, conduct a time audit. Secondly, create time boundaries in your business. Thirdly, understand how time compounds through processes, and fourthly, transform your time: in other words, take action and make the most of your hard-won time.
It’s time to roll up your sleeves, shut down social media and get cracking.
Step number 1: Time Audit
As I sat on the plane returning from an overseas trip last week, I was very aware of how many key deliverables I had due over the next 2 weeks.
Subconsciously I was contemplating each task using what I’d learned from:
Stephen Covey’s Time Management Matrix
John Maxwell’s Law of Priorities
Richard Koch’s 80/20 Rule, and
Dan Kennedy’s No BS Time Management for Entrepreneurs
Ultimately, it’s about being a “time assassin”, ruthless with how you manage your time as it’s your most valuable asset.
I consequently started conducting a personal time audit and categorising each task I had to do. I asked the following 3 questions:
Is this building my business?
Is this making me money?
Is this giving me time freedom?
By being able to answer yes to these 3 questions, I was able to narrow down my list to 6 priority deliverables.
Everything else needs to take a backseat and ultimately can be delegated and taken care of by someone else.
The time crunch and pressure to produce has given me clarity.
Correctly managing your time is intentional living and critical to the life of an entrepreneur.
Key question: What tasks could you stop doing or delegate after performing a time audit? (be brutally honest and challenge yourself here! =)
Step number 2: Time Boundaries
About every 4 months I lose control of my calendar.
This means I start working according to other people’s time schedule and not on my own.
In my daily life it looks like this:
I respond to emails at 11pm at night.
I agree to do meetings that end up absorbing the entire day, because they are either spread out geographically or not scheduled back-to-back.
I wake up on Sunday morning to check my emails in case anything urgent came in from overseas that needs responding to, and here’s my favourite.
I allow a client to reschedule a conference call with me 4 times over 3 days and I accept it.
If I’m not in control of my time, somebody else is.
My business will swallow me up and I’ll end up working myself into an early grave.
So instead, every 4 months I revert back to the concept of “boundaries”…boundaries with my time and boundaries in my business.
What does this look like?
I’m able to choose when I want to work, with which clients and in which location.
Not all customers are the same and my responsiveness, flexibility, and accessibility for each one needs to differ based on, for example, what our contract states my role is. Stepping outside one’s scope of work can have disastrous consequences.
I have defined boundaries around email, meetings, and my time, so I can work during the most effective times, on the most important things for me each day.
By implementing strict boundaries into my business, I have freed up more time and made more money than anything else I could have done. It also makes working fun.
This begs the question: “Why do I allow my boundaries to disappear in my business?”
It happens subconsciously. The more successful I become, the more my business grows, the more people ask of me, and the more challenges I face.
This is such an important topic that I want to dig deeper.
Maybe you’re like me and you have a love-hate relationship with email…
I’m constantly trying to tame the beast that is my inbox…and I’m sure you do too.
A mentor of mine taught me about ROIT – Return on Invested Time – and how the performance of this metric ultimately governs how excellent my products and services will become.
He said, “You start by defining your boundaries”. Here are just a few he mentions:
Time: What is your optimal time of day to think, to write, to make calls…then create blocks of time on your calendar and treat them as sacred. Following this you put like work into the same time blocks. For example, all calls are done on Friday, and only on Friday. No exceptions. As Dan Kennedy says: “All work gets its own appointment, much of it locked into the same time slot every week or month. Because the less flexible time you have, the more productive you are. The more distractions, the less productive.”
Email: Which email can you delegate, which should you delete, and which should you respond to immediately? Once again email belongs in a time block every day. If you are checking email every 10 minutes and answering phone calls on-demand you won’t get anything done.
Responsiveness: How quickly do you respond to clients, colleagues, and your boss? Do You have different obligations for different clients? Set limits on response time, such as ‘within 4 hours’, ‘within 24 hours’, etc. and communicate this clearly to your customer. This is about setting expectations.
Means of communication: You can dictate how you wish to be communicated to. I prefer email and text messages with short 15-minute phone calls. Tell others the best way to communicate with you. You decide, not them.
The purpose in creating boundaries is so you can have a sustained focus on 1-2 things every day…
If there are too many things occupying your mind, it will be scattered, and your work will become sub-optimal. It’s about being ruthless; it’s about being an assassin with your time and boundaries. There’s that word again that Paul Martinelli uses…
Remember, if you don’t set your priorities, then someone else will dictate your calendar.
Once you have your boundaries and processes set up then they’re on the chopping block every 90 days. It’s not just ‘continuous process improvement’, it’s the fact that you and I keep growing and changing and what worked last quarter may not be the right thing this quarter.
Know where the greatest return is on your time. The more successful you become the higher your skill level must grow at saying ‘no’, rather than ‘yes’.
You must keep the main thing the main thing.
Key question to think about for next month: What boundaries must you set up such that you keep focused on your main goals?
  from Blog | 729renegades https://ift.tt/2HIx4sT
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