#i couldve said SO MUCH MORE but i didnt want the ask to get too long DFJSDNFHDS im srry if this is already rlly long i just had IDEAS

[inmirova]

"it's easier to leave an abusive situation than it is to stop an abuser" :^( but it's not easy :^(

[sobersturniolos]

| GODSPEED,, chris.s

warnings: angst, arguing, making up (?), asshole chris ( what have i done ), chris x fem!reader

“ I will always love you. How I do, Let go of a prayer for you. Just a sweet word. “ ~ frank ocean.

you and chris were finally face to face with each other. after finding out what he really thought of you. he was yelling and you were yelling too.

„why wont you just stop! i tried to apologize for being this way, you ignored me. i tried calling, you hung up. i tried texting and you blocked me. you fucking blocked me.” you yelled, having your arms crossed over your chest.

„ maybe because you’re fucking annoying. you keep trying to get back with me and its not gonna work out. it.will.never.work.out.” he said, calmly.

„maybe thats because you arent trying to make it work! all you do is yell at me.”

„what do you not get? i dont want it to 'work’ because i dont like you. nor do i love you.” he replied, causing you to walk out the door in tears.

you cried the entire way home, barley being able to breathe.

you passed by a minivan, which immediately made you think about chris and his brothers.

you just decided to speed away from the van, wiping your tears with the fabric of your clothes.

when you arrived back to your house, you tore down every single damn Polaroid on your wall. folding up all the shirts he gave you and putting them on the highest shelf in your closet. then, punching holes with a pen in those „sweet cards” he made about how much he „loved you”

you laid on the floor on your knees. sobbing thinking about what you couldve done to have a different ending.

after you sobbed until your eyes were red, you just decided to get up and go take a bath.

you turned on the shitty generic speaker you had, turning on a random playlist. and who wouldve believed that the song that reminds you so much of chris would play.

that one fucking frank ocean song.

you couldnt even get through the first verse without feeling tears stream down your face.

jesus, you couldnt even listen to frank ocean because it always reminded you of chris. the chris who once cared for you.

all that time down the drain.

a couple weeks later, you got a text from chris. fuck.

the text consisted of him asking you to come by the lake, you and his favorite place to watch the sunset.

you almost immediately walked out that door, destined to see him at least one last time.

when you made it there, you saw chris throwing rocks into the lake with a sad expression.

„chris?” you managed to blurt out after a moment of trying to speak.

he turned and almost knocked you over as he engulfed you in a hug. he apologized so quickly.

„im so sorry. i didnt know what went over me. you were the best girlfriend, im a asshole for making you feel bad, i still love yo-“ you cut him off.

„chris.” you said, coldly.

„ are you gonna hate me after this?” he whined in the crook of your neck.

„ i could never hate you. i was wrong too, i did things that were unforgivable.” you admitted.

„ so would you give me one more chance?” he asked, his voice shaky.

„ one more chance. “

[massiveladycat]

i will never get over people laughing at octavian's death personally,,, he was SHOT INTO THE AIR!!! thats so painful. all the burns and the impact, plus being flung from a cannon and probably slamming into gaia (literal earth goddess) plus festus (gigantic metal dragon, i bet that HURT) and leo (pretty sure leo was burning)

he was a kid and he was annoying to some people and he was usually antagonized but he didnt deserve to die OR go out in that way. the gods are a thousand times worse than octavian, and apollo told him that he'd be a savior of new rome, but people still justify them. not to mind there are much worse people in the PJO universe (gabe, LUKE)

octavian ily they could never make me hate you EVER. idc what you say he could have been redeemed. did he do bad things? yes. but he was so deeply influenced and the day meeting with leo and the others, in which i remind you octavian literally was watching new rome get blown up (no wonder he was livid, his home was on FIRE).

like come on. octavian is a complex character and people aren't willing to admit that he could've been better and he was just a literal teenager in the sake of hating him because everyone else/pjo characters hate him.

he is such a tragic character imo because he grew up in new rome and all he wanted to do was protect it (and he was highly ambitious and aiming for praetor, i won't deny the fact that he was selfish but that is a quality that can be REDEEMED) and sure the way he went about it was messed up but most of his actions (except killing that one centurion) were justifiable

btw im not saying octavian's like an angel or anything im pretty sure i remember him "killing" a 5th cohort centurion once but then she was revived which . . . what was the point of that?? was it just to like make us hate him more?? huh??? and then was it even ever talked about again?? also yeah he blackmailed hazel thats not good also judging from the wikipedia it only said frank suspected octavian because.. he didn't have his spear?? what?? reminder that there is proof that a lot of pjo characters are unreliable narrators and for all we know octavian could've screwed up somehow and left his spear somewhere (just saying i'd do that too ngl)

also "I am the savior of Rome! I was promised!" i didnt know why but that quote DESTROYED me but now i know that it was because he genuinely believed he was doing the best for new rome and he'd finally have someone's praise and they'd praise him like they praised percy and reyna. pretty sure his mental state was not very good in that scene either and nico and will just let him shoot himself out of an onager on accident. also are we just going to gloss over the fact apollo told him that and encouraged him he was doing the right thing?? of COURSE octavian trusted apollo on that and believed it was the truth; apollo was his ancestor and someone he worshipped as an augur and trusted in for omens and prophecies and allat

yeah. octavian's an asshole. but he was a kid and he couldve been redeemed. then again i am a huge octavian apologist and im not saying you have to have the same opinions as i do also i will not be responding to any asks in my inbox im 2 tired to deal with that!! anyways dont go and insult people or me if you think the opposite thats fine !! i was just bored and found this in my drafts so whats the harm of posting it because im not going to get sent threats over this right,,, right??????

[gamblersdoll]

i have a fic ideaa!

so it’s sundress season and reader is looking cute in her lil dress so she goes out with hakari. hakari keeps getting annoyed with how much people keep staring at reader’s body so he snatches her into the bathroom and lets them know 🤭

cw: 18+, public sex, praise. ive been scrolling in my feed for hours tryna find this when i couldve just gone into my inbox. im a dummy.

“kin?” you ask, holding his hand under the table. both of you were at some lousy burger joint he wanted to go to, since he had a bad craving for meat.

“mm.” he grunted.

“whats wrong witchu’?” you ask, squeezing his hand for a quick second. you leaned into him, rubbing his back. “does your food not taste good? ill call them over–“

“thats not it, babydoll.” he said flatly, bouncing his knee. his eyes darted all over the place, scanning for something.

“then whats up?” you ask, frowning at this point. he stands up and tugs at your hand, signaling you.

“lets go.”

and it was a quick drive off.

you had more errands to run, heading into wallyworld and you briefly got the groceries that you needed for the house.

you felt like you were being watched, like you had millions of eyes on you. was it something in your hair? on your face? you didnt know. hakari hadnt said anything, so it couldnt be that. but he was upset about something.

“leave the buggy there. and follow me.” he said, taking you into the family bathroom swiftly.

“kin–“

“do you want to know why im pissed, and why everyone is staring at you?” he says, trapping you into the bigger stall on the end and sucking on your ear. you moaned out, nodding your head. “it’s your damn sundress. you look too fucken good.” he mumbled, now nibbling at the flesh.

“thats what it was?–“ you ask, before his large hand is on your throat, kissing you deeply until you pulled away for air. your dress was pulled up, and this pissed him off more.

“and no fuckin’ wonder— you had no draws on!” he growled out, shrinking to his knees and licking up at your clit. your hand immediately flew to your mouth, and your hips bucked into his mouth.

“m sorry- i didn’t realize–“ you muffle out, hakari making quick work of his jeans and taking his cock out. you were instantly flipped around, hips pulled to his.

“i bet you didn’t, not your fault though.. just gotta let ‘em know..” he whispered into your ear as he strategically slipped himself inside you, covering your mouth as you moaned from the intrusion.

his hips snapped into you quickly, never faltering. even if someone came in, he didnt slow nor fastened, he just kept going. “you like this, ‘ma?” he asked, close to your ear. you nodded, and him chuckling. “yeah? how much? tell papa how much you like it.” you squeeze around him, and he grips at your hips and thrusts into your cervix vigorously.

“kin baby–“ you softly moan out, hands firmly pressed against the wall and a creamy white ring forms at the base of his cock.

“thats it.. keep creamin’ on this dick.” he says, sucking at your earlobe again. “say my fuckin’ name babydoll.” he groaned.

“kinji— shiit!” you cry out, legs becoming wobbly. he groaned, spilling his load into your pussy, gripping harder at your hips as he shuddered.

“remind me to massage your hips later, i kinda gripped too hard.. sorry mama.” he says apologetically, kissing at your neck the cheek. you nodded.

once you came out the family bathroom after your little clean up, you continued shopping for whatever else you needed.

yet, you were banned from that wallyworld for approximately six months.

oh well, it wasnt the main one you went to, since your main was only ten minutes away, as the one you went to today was forty minutes away.

[ma3mae]

No one likes syringes!

Summary : You gotta take your weekly syringe but you're afraid of needles so how can these mfs (Dazai, Kunikida, Atsushi, Aku, Chuuya) convince you to take it 🤷

Genre : bit cracky and fluff, prob lots of teasing bc u know who tf im talking about 💀

Warnings : heartattacks bc we all simp too hard for these men 🛐 maybe a bit of suggestive themes at the end

A/N : managed to inject myself for the first time (aint no drugs, need them bc HEALTH) and bro, my hands r still shaky bc fear 😭 how do ppl do this so easily 💀 also the syringe is like a pen (also for this story) but broo its still scary and i need some bsd character comforting me 😩✋✋

Dazai Osamu

Lets say yall live together and hes at work while u r home alone

cant bring yourself to do it alone bc bro syringes are scary (even if its just a pen bc NEEDLES BRO) 😩😭

So you text him and ask what hes doing and tell him if hes got time to come home asap bc we r nearly crying at this point

hes gonna be SO ANNOYING like "i was just waiting for a text from you~ dont worry, your knight in shining armor will save you"

BROO he prob knew that you gotta take them today and also knew that nothing would be going on at the agency so he couldve stayed at home but nah 😭😭 (sadistic a** fr fr)

but hes still hurrying nonetheless bc hes not that MEAN -right???-

arrives at home and finds you on the couch holding the pen with shaky hands and his heart does feel a TAD bit guilty bc fr he couldve stayed at home and u would have gotten this shit over asap

gon be all like "dw im here now, okay? Lets just get this over with and then we'll cuddle, how about that?"

homegirl is about to cry at this point bc just FREE HER from this misery

sits next down to you and takes the pen from your hands

If you do wanna try it out yourself, he'll gently guide you through it

He knows how afraid you are and teasing would just make you sob instantly bc the pressure is already too much to deal with YEAH U BETTER STFU U TEASE !! jk still love him

will try to change your mind tho by sayinf stuff like "Really? ~ i mean its brave and good of you to try it yourself but I really love helping you, you know. Want to do everything for you, darling." he knows EXACTLY what hes doing to us by saying that

Is prob gonna give us that look and whisper in our ear and shi im sorry im too down bad for this man at this point 😩

if you dont wanna do it yourself then, he'll tell you to look at him while hes pressing the pen onto your thigh or stomach

You still cant keep your eyes off of it? Sry girl, theres only one solution

He'll just click his tounge at you while having that fking smirk on his face as he says "still too distracted, I see? Well seems like theres only one way to help you"

gives you a kiss on the lips and just deepens it while looking STRAIGHT into your eyes got my knees weak for him fr

you only feel a tiny sting and as soon as a "click" is heard, he'll break the kiss and just grins at you as if he didnt trick you lol

but who are you to complain, he sees that you liked it and will def comment on that

"see, love? Wasn't so hard after all. But you still did well. Proud of you as always"

pecks you on the lips again before setting the pen onto the table and wraps his arms around your waist bc NO WAY in hell is he gonna let go after that

"i think i deserve a reward for that~" "you said you were waiting for a text so you KNEW i had to do it today, right?" ".... welp, not gonna apologize on that 🤷🤷🤷"

u can understand why kunikida has to SIGH all the time as soon as dazai opens his mouth but oh well, you're too whipped to care about at this point

wont let you go so guess you'll have to reward him 💅 no ones complaining LOL

if you tell him to help you next time before hes gone for work, he'll def do it bc he loves u but poor kunikida gotta expect him arrive at work late more often bc he wont leave home without rewards 🛐

Kunikida Doppo

You already know that he got the exact day, hour, minute and SECOND written down on when you gotta take your pen

You tell him that the day is enough and that the time doesnt matter but NOO 😤 YOU WILL take it at the exact time

If its at ungodly hours like 3am or smth, bro he'll wake you up like no mercy for his schedule 😭

If u complain to him tho then dw he will rearrange it for u bc he may love to stick to his plans but he wont ignore your needs and stuff either get urself a man who takes care of u like that 😤😤

will prefer to do it before work, so if you're not an early bird then he'll wake u up but dw you'll get a forehead kiss and bro's already fully dressed n' stuff BUT waking up to him looking at you with such a loving gaze will make u forget that its 5-6am or smth 😩

will first let you get up in peace and make u some calming tea bc he knows what will come next ✋

"Y/N, I know you don't like it but you have to take your pen today, okay?"

if we start a tanthrum then he already knows about it like bro's prepared for everything!!

"Kuni, do we really ha-" "Yes." "But you know I dont li-" "Yes and yes. I know you hate it but don't worry, I've already written everything down on how to do it and what to be aware of so its okay to feel afraid but don't worry because I'm here. Nothing will happen and I've already bought your favorite snacks so you'll feel better but dont eat too much of it when I'm gone. "

u already know he spent a night or smth just researching everything about it as soon as you told him

prob even went to a library and once came back home with multiple books in his hands, hes THAT dedicated UGH I LOVE HIM 💕

you could just sob rn bc how did the earth bless you with this man KUNIKIDA I NEED U 😭😭😭

If the pen is kept in a fridge then dw he already put that shit out for it to not be cold anymore (prob counted the minutes and seconds LOL)

he'll sit you down on the bed or couch, disinfect the place on where you'll take it (lol that sounds WRONG) and he'll give you a peck on your forehead before asking if you're alright and ready to go through with it bc no way in hell is he gonna do it while you're too shaken up for it

If you wanna try to do it alone then he'll take your hand into his as you're grabbing the pen, slowly guiding it while praising you for how brave you are for trying this and that hes proud of you IM SOBBING

will also tell you to look at him if you get more afraid by seeing it on your skin

Honestly even if you dont wanna do it yourself, he'll make sure to be there and will praise you every time you get through with it bc you KNOW he means it

Honestly makes you tear up everytime and u just wanna kiss this man fr

you thank him and tell him how glad you are to have him, he'll be smitten even more than he already is

Cup his face with your hands and kiss him bro's gonna find it really difficult to not stay at home and just be in your arms

at the end of the day, his love for you exceeds his ideals so he wouldnt mind arriving at work some minutes later if he gets to have you in his arms for a bit longer

Will arrive at work with such a good mood that hes prob gonna freak dazai out with it especially when he overlooks some dumb remarks from him the power of love YALL but who can blame him, his heart is thumping louder than dazai's rambling LOL

maybe yall will continue when hes back home, who knows 🛐🛐🛐🛐🛐

Nakajima Atsushi

when you told him about the pen for the first time, he was literally thrown off like "wait, so you have to.... stab yourself regularly with that?????"

hes just SO precious bc his heart's squeezing at you asking him if he could help u bc you just feel so comfortable and just knowing that makes him SWOON

But at the same time hes panicking bc HOW CAN HE DO THAT WITHOUT HURTING U

Ngl hes prob also afraid of needles and stuff 😭 is gonna look at u like the pic above LOL

will ask yosano or even recommend that she should do it but you're like "NO!! im sorry, tsushi but im too scared of her and i feel safe with u :(((("

you got him WHIPPED and DEDICATED bc he'll def research that shit through and through

Will ask his coworkers (prob kunikida) how to best handle the situation

has everything ready but will stumble and be kinda hastily about it at first bc hes prob even more nervous than you are 💀

either it implifies your fear more or its just so ridiculous that you're legit like "ily but im not gonna die or smth 🤨🤨🤨" you cant blame him tho 😤

hes gonna be all like "OKAY OKAY, we got this. No, I GOT this s-so no worries, okay?" bro, BREATHE. Hes just about to pass out at this point jk jk

if you decide to try it out alone, he'll be a bit saddened bc does this mean you dont want him to help you after all?? :(( was he not good enough of a choice to be of help :((( TSUSHI STFU ILY

dw just reassure him that you obviously appreciate his help and still need him to be there bc no way in hell can u do it alone without ur hubby

will tell you everything he had learned about the pen and how to use it with a bit of a tremble in his voice but he pulls through with it!!

You manage to do it and BOY get ready for a rant on how proud of you he is

will want to pamper you with kisses on ur face "tsushi, i know that look. Go ahead and do it, dont hold back" "really, y/n!!?" "😩 bro do it ok" will try to hold back with gluing himself onto you but how can he NOT

If u dont wanna do it urself then it will prob go like this:

its time for yk what and he sees the genuine fear in your eyes but dw he got you

hes prob gon be like "my s/o need me rn and i have to help them!!!" hes actually gonna remember everythinf he looked up and prob memorized for you bc hes AN ANGEL will put his forehead against yours and tell you to look at him "i wont let anything hurt you and happen to you. You're afraid and honestly im afraid too but you and i will get through this, okay?" gives you the most lovestruck smile ever before he looks down and counts to three

"breathe in, y/n. It will be okay" he ignores his slightly trembling hands and at the count of three inserts it. GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF THE GUTTER📸📸📸

as soon as yall hear a click, he quietly counts to three before pulling it out and BROO the relief is refreshing af

"WE DID IT, Y/N!!!" Is hella giddy bc how can he not be proud of the both of you!!!! You did it!!! will honestly pull you in a hug bc hes just so happy

prob gonna realise that he just did it without asking u and will be sheepish all like "o-oh sorry, i just got too excited" "no tsushi. We should be happy about this so dont let go!!" no need to say it twice bc hes gonna wrap his arms even tighter around you and nuzzle his face into the crook of your neck ILL GIVE U A KISS TSUSHI 🛐🛐

will he feel bad for arriving at work a bit later? Maybe but a scolding from kunikida wont hold him back from holding you for a tad bit longer

He'll be a bit less nervous for the next times and it will surely decrease with each time bc practice yk but will obviously still hold you until he made sure that you're feeling okay afterwards

Akutagawa Ryuunosuke

Bro's nearly flabbergasted bc why are you making such a FUSS 🤨🤨 im sry dont sue me

"Calm down, you idiot. It's only a pen. You dont even SEE the needle."

dont ask him why hes staying with you if its JUST a needle then bc bro will prob just straight up get up and leave if you point it out 💀

will prob be the first to not even suggest but just TELL you to do it yourself aku im hurting over here 😩

will prob make an effort in atleast roughly skimming through a website about it prob smth weird like wikihow LMAO

If he does see you how afraid you really are of it, hes rly trying his best to ignore the small ache its giving his heart bc he takes no pleasure in witnessing u be so afraid✋ its still JUST a pen in his eyes at the end of the day lol

will just sigh and snatch that shit from your hands bc he cant bear to see you like this any longer are we looking that pitiful, probably LOL

But he'll be surprisingly soft with his touch, nearly just ghosting you with his hands is that even a term, nvm yall know what i mean

Hes just gonna be straightforward with it bc the faster its over the better. He wont admit that he just wants to help but cant convey it bc what even are feelings 🤷

He'll tilt your chin towards him and just say "Look at me, Y/N. Stop overthinking it. You won't get hurt from this stupid thing, okay? If smth does happen, I'll just destroy the factory thats making this."

You dont know if hes joking to lighten the mood or if hes serious bc its aku

But hes prob joking

anyway hes gonna ask you like smth rly random like "What do you wanna eat later" which will confuse you but you'll answer nonetheless bc hey hes initiating a convo!!

as you start to talk and he notices you're relaxed enough for him, welp yk whats happening

Actually makes you wince a bit bc it just caught you off guard

"Ryuu, what the f-?!" "Just bear with it." ok we have been silenced 🛐

yall hear the click of relief, he counts in his mind to three and quickly pulls that shit out

you're slightly trembling from relief from finally getting it over you and bro just clicks his tounge like "You're such a fool. Cant believe something insignificant like that makes you nearly shit your pants."

you lowkey glare at him for that bc BRO needles r spooky 😭 but dw before you even open your mouth to tell him off, he'll look to the side and say "... You did good for holding that out though... but its still stupid."

just give him a peck on the cheek or smth bc this boy is prob craving some praise after having helped you like that

"Thank you, Ryuu. I couldnt have done this without you. You're the best boyfriend I could ever ask for"

Give him a tight hug, kiss and boom you got him around your finger

he'll take a second to wrap his arms around you and will just hide his face in the crook of ur neck like our other boy tsushi

"Of course, I'd help... I'll still blow up the factory for scaring you like that."

"NO!!" jk he wont if u tell him not to but hes just trying to say he doesnt like seeing u like that we know aku, dw 💕💕

if his coworkers ask why hes arriving a bit later at work, he'll just tell them to shut up and continue with their work

If you look closely you'll see his ears turn a bit pink as he keeps thinking of you and your words 💕💕😭

Nakahara Chuuya

Honestly its gonna be a mix of every reaction possible I think

Like if you tell him about the pen, hes first gonna feel a bit pressured like "O-Oh wait so you want ME to help with it??"

Like no offense hes obviously feeling pretty happy about that you are asking him for help especially for smth important as your health

But he knows hes not the most gentle person and does have his worries that he might accidentally hurt you or smth

wont ask anyone for advice bc its his love of his life can i be that pls that asked HIM so he'll do it at the end of the day!!

but if hes feeling rly unsure then he wont mind slipping a question about it when hes reporting to mori

which means being not subtle at all

"So was that all for today's report of the mission." "Yeah." "Then do you need something or why are you still standing there?" ".... *pulls out a picture of your pen* do you know how to use this?..."

you def know that chuuya's feeling so embarassed that hes asking his BOSS but its a sacrifice hes willing to pay

mori will have mercy on him and tell him what he should be careful of and summarise on how to use it

Will prob throw in a "good luck~" bc how can u not TEASE him

anyway our boy's done his research and now comes the hard part

"Okay, dont panic Y/N." "HOW CAN I NOT WHEN YOU'RE HOLDING IT LIKE YOU'RE GONNA KILL ME" "JUST DONT PANIC, FFS"

dw as soon as he sees you trembling, he'll be softer than a marshmallow

a chuuya one

"Oi, look at me. I'll make sure nothing's gonna happen to you, alright? Will just sting a bit and thats it. Will take care of you after this so you'll forget this ever happened."

HOW CAN U NOT SWOON AT HIM 😩😩

he'll even take off his gloves so you'll be more relaxed if you can feel his skin bro the gloves are giving off doctor vibes in this scenario, will make us panic more LOL

if you really cant keep your eyes off it then well....

"Damn it, love. Stop looking at it." will just press his lips onto you for a second before breaking it and inserting that shi*

"Ch-Chuuya!" "I know, i know. Dont worry, its gonna be over real soon."

And boom thr click is heard and yall are finally done

Honestly his shoulders are gonna relax instantly, boy was tensed up even more than you skskskks but who can blame him

"OMG chuuya we did it!!" "Yeah, you did it, doll." bro's gonna latch onto you again bc that kiss from earlier wasnt enough for the both of u 😩

is it riling yall up? Probably but welp you 're already either shirtless or pantless so only one clothing to pull off less work for yall

Mori's just gonna be like "I see, you managed to get through it" and chuuya just tiltd his fedora down so u cant see his face bc he REALLY wants to ignore that his boss knows whats been holding our boy up cant blame him 🤷🤷🤷

***************

Lol that was WAY too long but honestly this was so good to write 😩 now im just gonna be sad that none of them r here to do it irl but oh welp, will just read more stuff about them ✋💅

[sweetcici11]

smoke signals

the future’s unwritten, the past is a corridor

i’m at the exit, looking back through the hall

you are anonymous, i am a concrete wall

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

ellie williams x abby anderson

small trigger warnings- blood, suicidal thoughts, losts of angst

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

ellie williams was a disappointment to everyone and everything she ever knew. she’s failed everyone that’s ever mattered to her in too many ways to fix. there’s a certain point in your life where you need to stop and force yourself to ask what youre doing.

and when that moment comes, the world goes quiet. not a single sound can be heard. not the heavy and ragged breathing of the blood covered girl. not the desperate thrashing of someone trying to survive. not the splashing of water. her ears fail her, and apparently so does her heart.

if you asked her why she let abby anderson go that day, she wouldn’t be able to give you a clear answer. she might give a shrug or a mumble, or she might pull a gun on you. she was so unpredictable, it was impossible to tell.

there was so much resentment in her body, but she was also tired. when abby crawled away from her, choking and gasping for air she thought she might never breathe again, ellie couldnt bring herself to even glance over at her, to see the damage she kept causing everywhere she went. it was taxing, and it cost her everything.

her mother. riley. sam. joel. jesse. dina.

when did loss break you? when did it finally catch up to you and make you give up? ellie was strong. stronger than anyone she’d ever crossed paths with. and yet, as she sat in the shallow water, the salt burning every scratch on her small body, sobbing breathlessly and cradling her seemingly endlessly bleeding hand, she knew it was over. the pain was too much. she wouldnt survive it. not this time.

“just go,” the auburn hair girl sobbed, her eyes shut tight. she held her hand, though not trying to make the blood stop. there was no point. “just take him.”

when abby heard those words, her mind immediately shot to the unconscious teenage boy in the boat, and her heart ached. though in ellie’s mind, she had forgotten of the boy completely. the only thing consuming her mind was yet again, joel. she knew damn well that the moment abby drove the boat away, he was gone. for good.

and she would be too.

maybe in some other world everything wouldve been worth it. maybe in another world, she wouldve had the gut to kill abby. maybe in another world, she couldve just fucking forgiven joel and the guilt wouldnt consume her every second of every day.

maybe. maybe not.

“get up,” rang a voice form behind her, momentarily snapping her out of her thoughts. she slowly turned her head and looked at abby; broken and bleeding, but still looking at her with the saddest eyes she’d ever seen.

it scared her.

abby wasn’t supposed to be real. she wasn’t supposed to be human, she was supposed to be a monster. she was supposed to be someone ellie could blame. someone she could hate. someone she could kill. not someone she could see herself in. not someone she was supposed to empathize with.

“what?” ellie asked, and her voice rang so broken in her own ears.

“i said get up,” abby repeated, and ellie despised how gentle her voice was. she needed her to yell. to hate her too. ellie didnt understand what abby meant, so she ignored her. it wasnt hard as she was losing blood and her eyes felt heavy. the stab wound in her stomach had reopened but ellie had no intention of trying to stop it.

her body hurt. she was tired. the water seemed to be getting rougher by the second and it was drowning her. she was suffocating in her own mind and she wanted nothing more than to be put out of her misery.

“you need to get up,” abby pleaded, starting to feel drops of rain falling from the sky, washing away the blood on her body just to be replace by more. “get in the boat, come on. the ra-rattlers will kill you.”

ellie ignored her, abby’s shaky voice foreign in her ears. ellie hated abby more than her mind let her know. the last thing she wanted was for her to get in a boat with her.

abby was getting frustrated. she was trying to help her despite not deserving any of it. the girl sitting in the water had single handedly ruined her life, and abby wanted to leave her there, bleeding out and to die, but for some reason, abby couldn’t help the tug in her heart. this girl was hurt and broken, but there was something inside of abby that needed to save her. to help her.

and she hated herself for it.

ellie on the other hand was losing consciousness. and quickly. her eyes were getting too heavy to keep open, and her head was light and spinning from the blood loss. if the bleeding wasn’t stopped soon, then ellie wouldn’t make it. ellie couldn’t find it in herself to care.

abby was conflicted. it was raining hard now, and the wind was picking up. it was only a matter of time before the water got unsafe to travel in. she had to decide quickly. should she try to physically force ellie into the boat and take her? it could be the only way she survives. but it could also kill them all if she tries fighting back. did she have enough energy? what if abby gets her in the boat, but ellie starts fighting after she’s in? the boat could tip over, and the current and wind was too strong. they were all too weak.

abby could just leave her there, but abby could already feel the guilt it would bring her. maybe, in order to heal herself, she had to help ellie heal too.

abby’s blue eyes were watching ellie carefully, studying every shoulder heaving sob and every shallow breath. abby was good in noticing the small things, and the obviousness that ellie was on the verge of passing out was clear.

abby caught it in the blink of an eye; the way ellie’s sobs fell short and the way her body started leaning too much to one side. despite her potentially fatally injured state, abby swiftly knelt down and caught ellie before she was submerged completely. she had to act fast. her eyes landed on her openly bleeding hand, blood gushing out of the stubs where ellie’s pinky and ring finger used to be. while that was a problem, what worried abby the most was the fact that what used to be ellie’s white tank top was now almost completely soaked in red, and the water around them was crimson as well. abby took in a deep and shaky breath as she stood up, ellie in her arms. the girl was completely unconscious, so abby didn’t worry about her fighting back. abby grunted as she forced herself and ellie to the boat. it was rough and painful, but abby still had a will to live. she needed to survive this, not just for her, but for lev.

lev who lay in the boat, now next to ellie, starved to the bone and even in sleep, his face looked so sad and pale. she needed to help him even if it killed her.

and so, with little time to spare, abby ripped a good part of her own tank top off and lifted ellie’s stained crimson shirt, and she fought the urge to gag at the sight. the wound looked bad. she took the piece of cloth and submerged it in the water below, trying to clean it at least a tiny bit. she wrung it out and quickly press it to ellie’s wound, and even in sleep, ellie seemed to wince softly. she shifted and abby paused, praying she didn’t wake up. when she didn’t, she tied it securely to her lower abdomen and quickly set off the untie the ropes, keeping the three of them there.

abby hadn’t driven a boat like it’s in a while, and this one was old, so it took a moment to get the engine to start, but when it did, abby could feel a spark of hope ignite in her chest; something she hadn’t felt in a long, long time.

⭒

catalina island was, thankfully, not too far. the fact abby was even still conscious was nothing short of a miracle. she felt awful and she wanted so badly to just let go and let sleep steal her away, but ellie’s, lev’s, and her own life depended on her fighting.

when the domed building came into view even through the heavy rain, abby felt a wave of relief wash over her sore chest.

she was so weak and tired that she almost crashed into the beach trying to park the boat. but she didn’t care; they had made it. she stumbled out of the boat, and immediately reached for lev before pausing slightly. ellie was still lying there, her breathing ragged and shallow. abby took a deep breath before picking up lev and getting away from the boat. she aimlessly heads for the domed building, trying to get help for all three of them. abby was half hoping ellie might just bleed out in the boat on her own.

abby’s whole body froze when she heard the clicking of guns and a loud voice.

“dont you fuckin’ move!” the male voice shouted, making abby slowly turn her head to the sound. this man had shaggy orange hair and minimal facial hair, and the darkest eyes shed ever seen.

“please,” she panted, her voice just as weak as she felt. “i-im abby, i radioed in a while ago. i was told to come here. we need help, please.”

the man didnt lower his gun, but he seemed to consider her for a second.

“put the boy down, just set him on the ground,” he told her, keeping his voice just as stern. abby reluctantly did as she was told, and silently thanked him for the excuse to rest her burning arms. “there any more a’ ya?”

abby nodded slowly, noticing how her head started spinning the moment she stood back up. “one more in the boat,” she mumbled. “shes unconscious. and bleeding.”

the man with the gun nodded in acknowledgment. he said something, but abby couldn’t make it out as everyting went black.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

hi y’all! this is my first time trying to write something here so please be patient

lemme know if you guys like this, i have more chapters written and stuff planned!! feedback is encouraged!!

yours truly, ci

[hearts4golbach]

The Night Shift.

Johnnie Guilbert x Fem!Reader.

Chapter 11.

I poured creamer into my coffee, leaving it darker than Tara's. she was sitting in the dining room on her phone. her hair was up in a messy bun and she didn't have her makeup done yet, but she was just as beautiful, which made me smile.

"my parents grow this, but it's actually really good." I explain, sliding her mug across the table.

"girl, why do you hate your parents so much?" she looked up at me, sipping her coffee.

"they just kind of fucked me up, you know? ive been so sheltered my whole life until imwas finally able to move out. i mean, being sheltered is okay but being too kept up is traumatizing." i explained with a sigh.

"do you even talk to them anymore?" she asks cautiously.

"they still text me almost everyday." i explained, "but its always the same shit."

tara nods, returning to her coffee. "so, you and johnnie!"

"oh, hush. i doubt he thought of it as anything more than just 'kissing the homies.'" i rolled my eyes. "i mean, he did admit i make his life a hell of a lot better." i quoted.

"y/n, you are as blind as a damn bat. drunk words, sober thoughts."

"well, again, he couldve meant it friendly like im one of his best friends." i sighed, "i really dont want to get my hopes up."

"i cant wait until i can say 'i told you so' because best friends dont act like this." she shook her head and opened her phone, showing me the photos of me and johnnie she took. she scrolled through them. i memorized the way johnnies hands clung on to my waist and the way he tilted his head to meet mine. tara was right, friends dont do that.

"i guess youre right." i shrugged. "i have no argument for that, i guess well just have to play it by ear.

"thank you." she said, feeling accomplished.

"whatever, tara." i pursed my lips together.

"dont worry, ladies. the party is here." jake walked into the dining room with his arms in the air. his hair was messy as fuck and he was still in his new years outfit.

"oh my god, you stink." tara joked, plugging her nose as she rolled her eyes.

"i am embracing my natural scent. let me live, tara." he threw his arms down to his sides.

"well, its giving me nose cancer." i went along with tara, but he didnt actually smell bad.

"whatever." jake sassed, sitting down at the table.

"can i fill jake in?" tara asked, excitedly.

i laughed. "this isnt highschool gossip but i dont mind." she nodded and began to whisper in jakes ear. "you know, johnnies not up so you dont have to whisper."

"whisper what?" a tired, raspy voice asked. johnnie walked into the kitchen, also with messy hair and in the same clothes. a mix of eye shadow and eyebags make his sleepy blue eyes more prominant.

"nothing." i smiled, feeling my face heat up. i covered my mouth and looked away.

[oiqs]

Deadpool POV

“Fuck you, I dont get topped.” Logan said, pinning me to the couch and pulling my pants down. “Okay, Okay! Youre moving to fast, girl!” I yelled at him as i lifted my arms up to wrap around his neck. “Just kiss me, we’re not in a hurry.” I said and he bit his lip, before grabbing my dick and rubbing it.

“Im not moving fast at all.” He said. But he literally was.

We had just finished watching a movie which the whole time he had been drinking so i know hes drunk and that means he’ll be super impatient during sex. Which, ya’know i could never complain about that. I really like it rough. But, I hate when he acts like what i said makes no sense. Hes literally moving at lightning speed to suck me off.

I moaned when he started rubbing my member faster. “Logan..” I said squeezing my eyes shut. “Hm? Tell me what you want.” He said leaning down to kiss my neck. “Fuck. You know i like when you do that.” I said and he nodded. He licked my chest and then licked down all the way to the part above my dick. I stared at him as he did. I couldve came all over his face right then and there. Hes so sexy.

“You hungry, kitty?” I asked him and he nodded pumping my dick a little before swallowing it whole in one go. I gasped at it and thre my head back. “Shit.” I moaned out. He sucked me slowly, exactly how i liked it. But, i guess today i wanted more. “Logan, faster.” I said before grunting as he did as i said.

i gripped his hair and bucked my hips up a few times. He started to jerk me off as he was sucking and i swear that combo was a bit too much for me. “I think im gonna cum..” I said pushing his hesd down on my dick. He sucked faster and sloppier and i thrusted into his mouth before he pulled away and i came his face and my stomach.

“Slut.” He said and i didnt even reply because i was out of breath. “That was amazing.” I said. It really was.“Yeah, Sure.” He said, before kissing me, roughly. We made out for a little before i began to pull down his pants. “Move your fucking hands.” Logan yelled at me and i shook my head. “Its my turn to sucky sucky.” I said and he pushed my hands away from his underwear. “You told me to slow down, bub.” He said to me and i wanted to fucking punch him.

“Logan shut the fuck up and fuck me.” I said sticking my fingers in his mouth. He sucked on them slowly, so I pushed them farther down his throat. He grabbed my arm and pushed it back. He pinned me to the couch again and hovered over me. “Dont fucking rush me.” He said and i scoffed. “Or what! You were being such a good boy earlier. Just fuck me, baby!” I yelled at him and he laughed. He pushed me down and choked me.

Okay.. So. Im not even gonna lie. I tried to fight him off of me but i immediately gave up because for some reason he was overpowering me and him being dominant like this was very sexy. I will never stop making fun of Logan for this day. Anyway…

I tried to lift my arm up but he pinned it back down even harder. “Dont move.” He said and i nodded slowly. He put one of his hands on my waist and pulled down his dick out of his underwear.

He teased my hole with his dick and i whined. “Stop!” I yelled at him and he started laughing again. “I was gonna stretch you out but you pissed me off.” He said and i pushed myself against him. “I dont even care just fucking put it inside asshole!” I said grabbing his arm and he pushed back. “I like when you beg, Wade.” He said and i rolled my eyes. “In a second im gonna hit you.” I replied to him. Hes really dragging it. “Yeah?” He asked and i nodded.

He lined his dick up with my hole and then slammed into me. I screamed and pushed him back. “Fuck! Wait!” I yelled at him and he shook his head, pushing down on my stomach. “L-Logan.. Oh my god.” Tears started to form in my eyes. He was going really fast It felt like he was ripping me open. But through all of this it felt so so so good.

“I like this position alot. You look a mess” He said before biting his lip and looking away from me, still thrusting back in forth inside of me as fast as he could. “I hate you.” I told him, trying to reach up to wrap my arms around his neck again. He held onto me and reached down, so i kissed him. It was really sloppy but he was quite literally pounding me like there was NO tomorrow.

He bit my neck and i threw my head back. “Im gonna cum.. Fuck.” i sighed. “No, dont cum.” He said and i wanted to cry. “Please logan. i can’t..” I said digging my nails into his back. “Youre so tight.” He said, completely ignroing my request and i shook my head. “Let me cum please.” I said more clearer. “I said no, if you cum i swear.” he said and i whined.

My eyes were rolling to the back of my head with every thrust. I felt like i was gonna burst. He was hitting the right spot everytime. I know i looked a mess, because i sounded a mess. Our 1 bedroom apartment was literally full of the sound of our skin smacking, and me and Logans moans.

Eventually he let me cum, after he came himself. But he didnt even stop. He fucked me in too many positions i cant even fucking count. At some point he was fucking the wounds he had put into my body. Hes fucking crazy. But the kind of crazy that really turns me on.

I laid ontop of him and jerked us off together. “After this im done, I swear Logan.” I said and he scoffed. “mhm..” He said moaning a bit. He kissed me and kissed me harder. A bit after we both came at the same time and my body gave out.

“Wade.. Im not done.” He said to me and i shook my head standing up. “Fuck no! Leave me alone.” I said. “Where are you going?” He asked me and i shoo’d him off. “Your flesh light needs to recharge!” I said and he laughed.

Absolutely never again.

[hiroshotreplica]

im sorry you probably dont want this in your askbox but i dont really think it makes sense to talk about madness and leafi the same way for a lot of reasons. Idk maybe im just seeing a transgirl getting relentlessly dogpiled because of old screenshots and having an over-empathetic response but fuck man she was 13 when those screenshots were taken. Shes not even 18 right now shes crazy young for her level of play (like literally should be community banned for lying about being 13 for multiple years during splatoon 2 to get around discord community guidelines but thats a tangent). She said in her apology she was trying to fit in with a real shitty group of people she doesn't associate with anymore and fuck man im probably giving herself way too much grace cause i seeing a terrifying exaggeration of something i went through on a public scale but like people are editing HER face onto memes and talking shit about HER and constantly misgendering her when madness is not only an actual adult but has been ACTUALLY DOING THIS SHIT RECENTLY. im not saying the shit she was saying wasnt heinous but fuck man this isnt gonna help her and i dont want the dumass bullshit she said when she was a middle schooler to ruin the rest of her life. sorry for the white girl mental illness blast but there is important context in this ranty anxiety and projection goop

anon asked for a tldr for the situation w/ jackpot as a whole, which included leafi's part in the situation. as the post was about how jackpot as a team has made racist statements. i chose screenshots that put my point clearly, which just so happened to be screenshots with madness and leafi. i'll go more into it here, though

i did not mean to compare her to madness when including screenshots of her old statements. i was compiling the most blatant screenshots from the thread i had originally linked in a prior post. i was going to include other things, but didnt have the time to compile them and was beginning to get stressed about being the source of this info on tumblr.

i was also going to include this video of her saying racist statements in 2024, but i didnt want to include a twitter link for an anon that couldnt access twitter. im realizing i shouldve done so

i do feel bad for her getting involved with a group of people THAT bad if she was truly that ignorant when she was younger, but thats where my sympathy ends. she still acted racist and still associated with clearly racist people even when she was older and more mature. ive learned since making that post that she was born in 2007. 16 is still an age where you should be mature enough to understand that those comments are racist, even with america's shitty public education system glossing over racism.

i definitely see why this can look like people dogpiling on a trans woman though, and the people doing memes and editing her into them in general about this situation are disgusting. i had no idea she was trans and that people were misgendering her. anyone making this situation about her being trans are awful and not people i stand by.

but all of that, including her being skilled despite her age, still doesnt forgive or erase her actions. nothing like that does for the other members of jackpot that have also stated racist things. nothing like that does for any other comp splatoon player that has said anything similar. the apology she put out was needed, but from what ive heard from others, it wasnt the best. she is writing another apology, though, so it couldve just been rushed.

no one has to accept her apology, either. as a white person myself, im not one that should even be one to accept her apology. it wasnt an apology for me, and it isnt one for you, either (if you are white as you say but i might be misreading). people should not be painted in a negative light for not accepting her apology even if it were an amazing one.

the way some people are reacting to this situation is not okay, but she still did awful things that she should be held accountable for. the other guilty members of jackpot are not better than her, but theyve all still said fucked up things. none of them have done anything to prove they arent racist, and theres only more evidence coming out that proves that they have been, so its hard to process at the moment.

could things change? yes, of course, but as of right now, leafi has stated racist things as recent as 2024 and put out a poor apology trying to defend herself. people are handling it poorly and trying to make it about her identity and making memes on it when it is not the right thing to do. these racist claims are being put w/ other racist claims made by other jackpot team members so it was included in my tldr post about the entire situation.

i apologize for poor wording in this, im not the best w/ these kinds of posts

[disenchanteds]

okay now ep 2

the wild card is literally they are always starving but they cannot eat normal food they have to chomp on stones and dirt and grass and wood and everything that isnt usually food and each one gives them a different effect (including poison) and they have to figure out which foods actually feed them AND THEN it gets randomised every like hour or so? (they have 3 hour recording sessions so idk exact timing so) and so they start from square one again and there was A Lot Of Death

now so every life series cows are important for food u see but then thats where all the mayhem and stealing happens and impulse goes over to gem and joel to accuse them of stealing his team's cows when they didnt and it was actually martyn but none of them know that and so the next time scott cleo pearl and impy comes over gem says "i dont like you impulse" AND THEN SHE TURNS AROUND AND SAYS TO PEARL "and i dont LOVE you because you betrayed me last season" and just the pure fact that gem said love instead of like for pearl??!? the fact that she just rounded on pearl like that even though pearl has done nothing??? *cries in despair* and now we have gempearl divorce arc

TO MAKE THINGS WORSE bdubs found out that cobblestone wall causes poison and gives it to pealr and asks her to eat it but pearl already knows what it does so bdubs asks her to give it to someone else and she tries to give it to gem but gem refused and did not want to trust her even when pearl said she would eat it with her and then pearl eventually gives up and walks away while saying "i should try this on someone else but everyone else is my ally" BUT GEM OVERHEARD IT and turns to scott who was just standing there and said "wHy would she say that SHES INSANE" even though from pearl's pov u can basically tell that pearl believed that with gem she wouldnt take the aftermath too hard and would laugh about it with pearl and then forgive her while others might not but GEM TOOK IT THE WRONG WAY AND UGHHHH

and then heres more stuff they've said on livestreams

basically gem has been playing through subnautica and there was this one scene where a person breaks up with someone else and says the line "i would like to reduce our hours together. to zero" and gem basically reacts to it by saying "wow i've never heard a breakup line so cold before...reduce our hours together to zero. i should try that line on pearl" head in hands WHY gem WHYYY

and then pearl on her stream said "why are people saying i betrayed gem when she was actively trying to kill my mounders (her alliance team) the whole time and i actually allied with scar for the last episode and never had any actual alliance with gem so really she betrayed me first" and guess what SHES RIGHT. i really need to lock them in a closet and have them talk it out i swear. and during the secret life finale even, pearl literally said to gem "lets sword it out gem lets sword it out" when pearl couldve killed gem with a bow easily and pearl is also better with an axe and has lost to gem multiple times with a sword but idt gem heard it and scar and gem were already battling it out so now we have gempearl divorce. i am both so enthralled but also in pain. save them please

there is actually so much more that happened in this ep but i'll prob talk about it tomorrow together with ep 3 because im sleepy eepy and i have to watch ep 3 that just came out too

OKAY OKAY TOXIC YURI TIME OKAY. gem NO DON'T DIVORCE HER but also I am SO here for it they should get more toxic but also PLEASE DON'T CAN YOU BE HAPPY PLEASE but also YESSSS TOXIC YURI

[actualbird]

do you think once giann returns/is saved he would take over as the pax ceo or he would ask marius to keep running it? bc i get the vibe that under any other circumstance he would not want marius to endure that stress and he knows how much he dislikes it (i mean marius literally does everything in giann’s name and says he wants out once giann is back!). But I can also see that mhy would throw that whole thing at us where giann is like “bro… you’ve run it so well. better than i ever could… you should continue as the ceo…”. obviously we Don’t Know what will happen in canon so in terms of your personal headcanon, what do you think?

oh my gosh anon, the “bro… you’ve run it so well. better than i ever could… you should continue as the ceo…” is something i never thought about and hATE SO MUCH NOW THAT U MENTIONED IT AJHFVJKDS I NOW HAVE ONE FEAR!!! hyv for the love of god do NOT go that route. i'd rather hyv just kill giann instead of that.......KIDDING

but oh gosh i really hate that scenario because my personal headcanon and ideal hope for if giann ever returns is that he takes up CEO mantle again, i agree with you!

though my personal hc differs though in the sense that....i also think giann kinda liked his job before he went missing. he didnt like how itd take too much time away from time he couldve spent with marius, he didnt like the very slimy environment of corporate backstabbing, but he liked heading Pax. he liked making it better than it already was.

i think this because:

1) i just think its neat!

2) austin has noted that giann is different from himself and from marius (said in a scene in marius' sweet chapter 4). he and marius tend to be more closed off, keep more of their cards close to their chest, are less trusting. meanwhile, giann was described by him as somebody more emotional and even naive.

and yet in spite of that, canon has showed us giann did a tremendous job heading Pax during his run and was wildly praised by the public for his leadership. so he was different. but different worked. he was dang good at whatever he was doing. i think giann's Difference in how he operates in the business world is a fitting change to the cycle of wariness and endless distrust that made austin and then marius The Way They Are because of the business world, itd mean a more open and transparent future for Pax

....and also because giann would wanna relieve marius of the role that hes been carrying for years

like i know that in a sense, giann taking pax back isnt as ~subversive~ as marius continuing to head it. but idk.....from what i know of giann—both his immense love and protectiveness over marius and his own objective success at being CEO—i would quite dislike it for him to go “bro… you’ve run it so well. better than i ever could… you should continue as the ceo…”

i see him more going like.... "bro....youve run it so well and im so proud of you. you ran it better than i ever could, and thats given me one hell of a standard to live up to. but you can rest now. thank you for helping me. now, it's my turn to help you."

and then marius goes for a phd in art history and becomes an art professor able to pursue his passions and teach it to likeminded individuals while also still moonlighting as "Z" because wouldnt that be such a fun secret identity for an art professor to have HAHA. THATS WHAT MY HEART WANTS!!!!

so yea thats my personal headcanon for this!

[lynnthefrenchtoast]

Lines from "In The Other Universe" that I CANT GET OVER

in which a fanfic writer (me) overexplains her oneshot bc I NEED TO RAMBLE AND MY IRLS FOLLOW ME ON EVERY OTHER PLATFORM SO TUMBLR IS ALL! I! HAVE!

(u should prob read it first this wont make sense otherwise)

"Even though it was not his name, Yin Yu turned"

i dont know if this is a canon scene or not (sue me the books are LONG and hard to buy in my country) but i've read about yin yu getting mistaken for yizhen and getting totally upset. so i decided to start this fic with him being so okay with it that he responds to qi ying's name as if it's his own.

(also because if ur so close to someone, ur nosy abt their business because it also becomes your business) I WANTED TO CONVEY THAT CLOSENESS FROM THE VERY FIRST LINE

"Should I tell Yizhen you can't even recognize me?"

CANON YIN YU IS SO GLOOMY AND HONESTLY WE UNDERESTIMATE HIS POTENTIAL TO BE TEASY. i just know he could be. all hard workers have a sarcastic inner voice

"The man damn near shits his pants"

AHAHHA okay look. i have this tendency when writing to be REALLY PRETENTIOUS AND FANCY. and ive learnt that usually NO ONE GIVES TWO SHITS. compared to genshin, tgcf fanfics are so beautifully written and sometimes i gotta remind this fandom to SPEAK INFORMALLY (unless its qi rong. then. yea. BUT WHO READS QI RONG FICS?)

"The blank wrist that has never known the kiss of cold metal"

I RIPPED MY OWN HEART OUT WITH THIS ONE

"In this universe, he discovers it's such a simple thing to be happy."

proof that quanyin is literally hualian's cousin

the entire earring scene

i am a sucker for qyz's over-attachment to the earrings. ik a lot of ppl think he's like this because its the only thing yin yu ever gave him but NO headcanon that even in the other universe, yizhen would be overly attached because hes a puppy

he xuan scene

canonically, he xuan would NEVER. bc 1) he's too lost in his own ways to ask for advice and 2) it would fuck with his earth master disguise too much. but since it's the other universe!!!! I CAN DO WHAT I WANT.

“Yizhen’s victory is my victory,” he declares, with a tone that leaves no room for argument. “His loss is my loss. When Yizhen cries, I am sad. When Yizhen smiles at me, my heart is so full it could burst.” He brings two jade white palms together, interlocking the fingers like entangled limbs on a hot summer morning. “We’re like this. One shared past; one shared future. As a Shixiong, don’t you think rather than being jealous, I’m extremely proud of how far he’s come?”

my favourite freaking line can you tell? IT SHOWS THEIR ABILITY TO ROOT FOR ONE ANOTHER. SHOWS EMPATHY. SHOWS LOVE. ("my heart is so full it could burst") THE RECALL TO THE MORNING THEY WOKE UP TOGETHER, REMINDING YOU OF DOMESTICITY AND SIMPLICITY AND TRUST AND CLOSENESS.

ONE SHARED PAST; ONE SHARED FUTURE ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? this is all i ever wanted for them. to be able to grow together and live together and die together. TO HAVE A SHARED PAST, PRESENT AND FUTURE.

this line is also loaded to me bc i once wrote a fic called "entangled pasts; estranged future" that wasnt good enough to be posted but GOD IT REMINDS ME SO MUCH OF IT

"Here, he never needs to know the weight of a mask – neither physical not metaphorical."

i dont like how i worded this but IT NEEDED TO BE SAID. YIN YU NEVER NEEDS TO KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO WEAR THE WANING MOON MASK but more importantly NEVER NEEDS TO KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO WEAR A MASK TOWARDS QUAN YIZHEN. NEVER NEEDS TO HIDE RESENTMENT. im shaking with all they couldve been and didnt become.

"Here, Brocade and Immortal are just two words"

hear that? its the sound of me BANGING MY HEAD AGAINST THE WALL AAAAAA I SO DESPERATELY WANT THIS TO BE REAL i mean i understand if they werent so tragic i wouldnt love them as much but IT HURTS! (*100 teehee)

"Sure it will."

i actually hate myself why did i end it like that even in my fanfic i cant let them be happy. huh. i have to subtly hint that this isnt what happens.

its actually so upsetting that the whole fic is so nice and healing and all of it is just overcasted by this knowledge of "its not real. they never get to be this happy. what really happens is they resent each other and leave each other and they become one shared past; two estranged futures."

you can call me insane. im aware no one thinks this deeply about fanfiction and most people are on the site for smut. BUT I THOUGHT LONG AND HARD ABOUT IT SO YOURE FORCED TO LISTEN TO ME RAMBLE

[cuddlingwithmydemons]

okay eclipse thoughts here we go

first of all: subz

bitch is soooo soldier coded it's not even funny anymore. his inventory is always too full of fighting materials for him to take his armor off during discussions. he stands around silently until directly spoken to and even then he usually turns the conversation to someone else. when i picture purple duo in my head i get subz standing just in front of vitalasy in full armor with a sword. after vitalasy was killed on the prison subz immediately took off after the assailant saying 'this shit doesnt slide'. his first thought was 'no way zam betrayed' no way the man he swore to protect would turn on him. no way. he didnt stop to question whether mapic and ro were in on it, they were there and attacking him and he wanted a fight. this man is a bodyguard and solider and knows nothing except build pretty base fight fight protect grind fight protect fight. he trusts zam still. he isn't sure about vitalasy. he pushed vi towards being the villain. villain arc was his original plan. his morals are a grey area molded into whatever shape is convenient for whoever hes attached himself to. im not sure he'll be able to hurt zam when the time comes. im not sure he'll be able to leave vitalasy.

next on the chopping block: vitalasy

what a fucking conman. knows his way around words and USES it. hes not very good at talking on the spot and kinda works himself in circles but he knows how to press buttons and get people either on his side or secure an enemy he wants to have. he'll tell you hes not the leader he has no power over people but his power is more subtle than a crown on his head. when things got heated in the zam discussion he rose to the challenge, yelling right alongside zam and bringing up all the ways zam had fucked up to get him to see reason. when it didnt work he switched to victim coding himself until jaron killed him and he realized zam had betrayed. the acceptance (defeat) in his voice when he asked if zam had done that haunts me. he didnt want revenge like subz. he didnt immediately go for the attack. he just wanted to talk. after he died he kept swearing. he said fuck live on twitch.tv multiple times because of the emphasis it would give to his anger. he typed it in in-game chat to show zam how angry he was. hes stuck unable to stand up for himself against zam because of the tyrant label hes surrounded himself in. he used subz's gum under their shoes metaphor at the end to loop in back around and told him they were gonna be great villains. terrible, awful, amazing villains. what do you mean he was supposed to be good? this was the point all along. all roads led here. trust him.

and lastly: princezam

this motherfucker makes me so angry right now i swear. mans is so traumatized it blinds him. he sees so much bad in all people he hides the good from himself. everything is black and white with him. these people are bad, these people are good, these things are bad, these things are good. he didnt have to betray. he couldve just left and things would've ended differently. but thats not right. thats not the princezam way. if he doesnt want to be on their team they must be evil. and doesnt evil deserve to be killed? after the betrayal he was joking with 3ht. he was laughing and joking and had already moved on from eclipse. the attachment ended when he decided they were evil. there was no more love. no more care. black and white. good and evil. imagine a man who is so so traumatized and scared of being alone that also has to always be so so morally correct. are any of his decisions going to be logical? are his conclusions going to make sense? he said himself that he wants to push vitalasy and see if he reacts. if he reacts hes obviously been evil all along and zam was right. he still trusts subz. he thinks vitalasy has been lying and manipulating him the whole time. he did exactly what mapic said he would do because mapic knows zams betrayals. how long until 3ht do something he deems wrong. will he be willing to go on alone?

[spacedlexi]

you said that you "need 2 characters to deeply care for each other and positively impact each other for me to want to ship them" so which of the twdg canon ships do you actually think work/make sense? and by canon ships i mean like actual established relationships, implied relationships or perhaps a character that was crushing on someone else before death.

me immediately blanking on every relationship in twdg upon reading this ask

the only one i stand behind with conviction is clemvi. idk if you need me to explain why i feel like ive done it a million times by now 👀 but yeah theyre the only relationship i "Ship" in regards to the quote where i see them as a match for each other and think romance makes sense for both parties

as for some "in defense of"s

i'll defend javi and kate. my only Real problem with them is how they handle david in it like girl can you at least take off the wedding ring before we kiss 😭 my brother still thinks youre his wife (plus they did push it Really hard.. but like.. narratively i understand why they did. family is a running theme of the series and javi and davids relationship is like the main conflict). but like. kate and javis relationship Makes Sense. she had a shit husband (who wanted to go back to the army anyway). her and javi already had the beginnings of Something before the outbreak even happened. she was left with javi to take care of 2 children that werent even biologically hers (i enjoy the complex family dynamics in twdg as a whole). and together theyve been surviving for years as a family unit. i think javi having feelings isnt up for debate, its more just will he act on those feelings or will he respect his brother? and like.. fuck david am i right? kate was Not happy in that relationship and deserves better, and javi cares about her. but also the pressure from their dad to get along after hes gone. it all works for me even if it couldve been executed better

and i .... sigh .... Understand gabe and clem. BUT!!! i think they have different feelings towards each other and its an important distinction. gabe definitely has a huge crush on her, shes cool as hell, but i think her feelings in return are fueled by hormones and the fact that she hasnt been around anyone her own age since DUCK (sarah was 15 at the time). like. does she think hes cute? yeah. but he can also be kind of a huge jerk sometimes and acts recklessly. i think its those moments that snap clem out of it lol. seeing this response in S4 felt vindicating im taking it as sad loner clem having a hormone induced crush. like girl yes or no?? this is the most direct option??

personally i dont like them together because i Hate tropes where the more mature girl half has to teach the immature boy half to grow up and be capable and thats somehow romantic. ESPECIALLY in clems case where she is literally already raising someone like her hands are full ok. her assuaging his ego makes me 🤢 girl you dont have to take that second gun just because he was gonna cry about it if you didnt. its just not romantic to me. also i think its soooo funny that clem uses the same tactic on gabe that she does on aj in S4 with the "i need you to watch my back" to stop him from complaining about being left behind at the gate LOL. also i just think he loves his dad too much who clem hates more than anyone on earth so like.. theres that

uuhhh who else... alvin and rebecca are fine. like i have nothing to say about them but i believe their relationship and think they wouldve been good parents to aj. hmmm.... i guess thats it for the ones i have defenses for?? the others just like.. exist. like im neutral

[shdwwlkrsblog]

Stargazing with Kakashi

Gn! Reader

Tw: nothing just fluff , romantic relationship

Naruto-masterlist

Kakashi is pretty quiet the whole time unless you start a convo . he's happy to talk with you but , comfortable silence doesnt bother him too .

He is just happy alone with being around you in peace beneath the clear nightsky .

You both often sit against a tree (well ,you sit against his chest and enjoy his warmth) or lay down in the grass just enjoying the view .

With kakashi sitting against a tree and you against his chest expect him to sneak his arms around you , pulling you further to him, letting a content sigh out.

Or he's busy playing with your hand in your lap . Fiddling with it , softly tracing over the scars you got from being a ninja .

Kakashi is a really good pillow so i dont think youll be getting tired from that Position soon .

Expect him to shower you with praises. He just sometimes gets the urge to praise you a lot , compliment you and just overall show you his love.

Do it to him too . You wont see his blush ,probably bc its too dark or he's hiding it , but you'll know it has the effect you want when he squezzes your hand a bit lovingly .

Now when laying down on the grass he'll be also your pillow or , if you ask him to , hell lay his head on your arm/stomach .

Please give this man headscratches then . He'll quietly hum contently .

If you rest your head on him tho kakashi will play with your hair or if its in reach of his hands kakashi will just play with your hand a bit , but its mostly just softly brushing his thumb over your hand . Its just such a calming activity you know?

You guys talk about the future while watching the Stars. However sometimes sad topics sneak their way into your conversation . If its about a experience in combat/ on a mission you had hell try his Best to comfort you and cheer you up.

Stargazing is also the one of only times he'll truly talk about his past , Feelings about it and feelings nowdays . But its still a sad topic for him so please cheer this good boy up , will you ?

~~

You layed next to him in the short grass , head on his shoulder staring up looking at the Stars , but your attention was on him , rambling about a recent Mission he had with Team 7 . Sakura got hit pretty bad , almost fatal . And if that wasnt enough they got sasuke pretty bad too . They are both in the Hospital currently. "I think they are going to let them out in the next 2 days or better said when their bodies are fully okay again . Naruto is busy training , it didnt sit too well with him that he couldnt protect sasuke good enough , while i was busy putting bandages around sakuras leg"

he sighed before he continued "this all couldve gone so wrong if the other ninja werent nearby and heard naruto scream . I wasnt able to protect those 3 alone , there were too many enemies" his voice a mere whisper . You knew those children really grew onto his heart , he almost saw them as his own children . You grabbed his other hand "kakashi , you did well enough . Noone can expect from a human to do so much . They didnt die bc, firstly they have been taught by you , secondly you were there doing your Best "

you tried to comfort him while rubbing circles on the back of his hand . he sighed "i know but" he began but you interupted him "please kakashi dont be so hard on yourself , you did your Best and im proud of you ." (A/n: im bad at comforting;-;) you explained and another sigh escaped his lips "you're right . What would i do without you?" He asked but still baffled by the fact he gave in so easily you just squezzed his hand slightly , smiling.

He squezzed right back "love, youre just as precious as those stars , even more" he almost whispered that . You laughed "a bit cheesy dont ya think honey?" He chuckled

You both continued stargazing occasionally talking

[todayisawthewhxlewxrld]

ILL GO OVER IT VAGUELY CUZ ITS A LOT AND IM TOO LAZY

AHEM

to start off, even though i did i say i planned on cutting them off, it felt like they were genuine when they apologized cuz they didnt act that way, maybe its bc i didnt hang out w them much after that cuz it was summer but basically i changed my mind)

so b4 i explain why, you need background info. basically like in march (b4 i confronted them in june) friend b came up to me like idk in march and said they had a secret but wont tell me but she said she'll tell at the end of the school year, then when i asked she tried to gaslit me into thinking it never happened.... 🥰 i forgot abt it thinking it was no big deal (like wtf is this kindergarten or smth...)

ANYWAY FASTFORWARD TO LIKE LAST WEEK

we're in highschool now and i have gym with friend a, and SHE brought it up, i asked her she said she cant tell me w/o friend b givng her permission. and i was kinda pissed cuz why bring it up if ur not gonna tell me???? also whats such a big deal that you wont tell me 🤨 but i didnt rlly say anything mean but i kept asking cuz i rlly wanted to know.

but she brought it up AGAIN the next day during lunch (she was also acting kinda distant from that day at gym)

so that afternoon i called my other friend (who hangs out w us at lunch)and my bestie and told them whats happening cuz i wanted to know if i was being dramatic by wanting to know (they were aware of what happened in june btw).

anyway with them on call i asked both of the seperately but they kept acting dumb, then in the gc i told them i was being serious and asked them, Then i got mad at them cuz they weren't taking me seriously :3

and i lashed out on them and told them i were gonna cut them off if they were gonna keep acting like kindergarteners and lie to me

they still didnt take me seriously, but my friend did end up telling me (like after 30 mins of me asking them again and again)

and basically they were (or more like only of them but the other one knew and didnt tell me) impersonating a guy on snap that i was talking to, (only as a friend tho, i started talking to "him" bc my friend who was impersonating him introduced us ) this rlly just was like my wake up moment and i was like no fuck you im done

OH AND back when we started talking to "him" i came up with a theory that it was my friend but my other friend told her and she kinda like cussed me out saying i was stupid for thinking that.....

anyway they thought i was threatening them by saying i was gonna cut them off for some reason but i left our gc and a few other ones. and my friend kept messaging in the other gc's saying "you forgot this one" and stuff and kept joking around

(also friend A asked abt a gift friend b gave me for my birthday asking what i was gonna do with it, and i said ill give it back idc but thats such a cheap thing to say when i cut them off)

ANYWAY the next day i wanted to give back the hoodie but i didnt rlly wanna talk to her, so i gave it to my friend who had a class with her.. and after school one of my other friends (who was on call w me) was going to a crochet club with her after school and told her that she wanted to talk to me cuz she didnt know why she was getting dropped. she also said that she got angry when my friend gave her the hoodie instead of me cuz she wanted to talk to me......she couldve came up to me during lunch or gym but she didnt?? but like wtv 🙂

THEN i texted her cuz i thought it wouldnt be fair if i didnt explain told her my reasons (kind of argued?? idk)

but i made it clear that i was NOT interested in giving 3rd chances and she said okay (ngl they were making stupid excuses too but still apologized....felt fake af tho)

sighhh but yeah basically what happened...nothing much 🥰 totally wasnt sobbing when it all went down

ANYWHOOOOO imlovingthenewsmau sedfghjkl.

P.S can i be added to ur taglisttt

🐺⛓️🥀

:3

THE FUCK ?1??1?1

the catfishing is actually crazy but coincidentally one of my friends also catfished me in middle school… well tried to i knew it was her immediately😍 BUT that being the secret that they were keeping from u or whatever is so fucked up?? especially when they were so omg teheee we’re not going to tell u stop askingggg (but then kept bringing it up like they were having fun watching u want to know so badly??? i almost said smth real mean whew) anyway they’re just acting stupid by “not knowing” y u dropped them and im very glad u did!!! bc u do not deserve that nor need that in ur life 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️ especially not when ur just starting highschool so !!! proud of u !!!

and yes u can b added to the taglist :3