#i considered answering them in first person for them but eck and briar are so off the mark on how they view themselves

[j-l-kepler]

For the ask game: Failure for Briar, Betrayal for Em, Alone for Eckhart!

OHOHOHO THE ANGST... Thank you for this ask! Sorry I didn't get to it sooner!

From this [post]

CW Warnings and Answers below the cut!

Briar Lockren - Failure

[CW - Abuse in Family and Relationships, Implied & Attempted SA and Coercion]

What's your OC's greatest failure? Have they been able to move past it? Does anyone else know about it?

To her, Briar's greatest failure was not stopping Rowan from his Ascension. To answer all those questions, I'll tell you her story.

See, Rowan Amberclaw was more than a friend she grew up alongside - they were all they had as they grew up in the Cult of Cyric. Briar was a half-drow who was very clearly not her spiteful father's daughter, so she was never accepted enough for the cult's teachings to stick. Rowan, however, was the son of their sect's leader and always felt he was coming up short. They relied on each other. They had no one else in the world.

Rowan didn't leave the cult while Briar did what she could to distance herself, but the two remained close. Since their main concern was sabotaging Banite uprisings in Luskan, Briar was able to be persuaded to help unofficially. I don't think every enemy they faced was deserving, and Briar buried her suspicions in order to preserve their unstable relationship. Rowan got very good at lying to Briar and coercing her into situations she would later rationalize. They were 18, just barely adults, and neither had a good frame of reference for what a relationship was supposed to be. Even so, they loved each other. Briar was a very different person back then. They both were.

Briar made a lot of excuses for him, but she didn't internalize the gravity of her compliance until it was too late. I couldn't tell you when Rowan's genuine love for Briar twisted, but I can tell you when she finally couldn't ignore it.

On the night Rowan killed his own father and usurped his position, Cyric recognized the young man. His deceit, his entitlement, his ego, they were all worthy tributes to The Prince of Lies, and so Rowan became the Chosen of Cyric. Briar believed she was at fault for enabling him, but then he tried to do something terrible. There were no sweetened lies or honeyed words that could distract her from the reality of who he had become. She fled, and he cursed her on her way out the door.

It's been three long years of travelling to outrun Rowan's watchful eye. She hasn't been able to move past it. Misfortunes followed her like a shadow ever since. Anyone who knew about her curse didn't live very long due to natural disaster or mysterious unlucky circumstances snuffing out their lights. (Basically, Briar turned into a Final Destination magnet) And that's on the off-chance they didn't run her out of town for having Cyric's symbol branded onto her arm!

Briar believes Rowan's ascension could've been avoided if she did more than comply with him. If she tried harder to get him away from the cult, maybe they could've been happy together. The worst times are when she believes she should just go back to him so he'll stop haunting her nightmares.

I don't think Briar was right to enable him. But I don't think she would've been able to help as much as she hoped she would. I don't know who Rowan would've been. I only know who he chose to be, and that Briar regrets her hand in it every day of her life.

(Briar was written as a fake Companion Quest "The Weary Ranger" before I made her a Tav, so she's got a hell of a history lol)

These next ones will be a bit easier, I wager...

Emerleigh Markolac - Betrayal

[CW - Mentions of the Slave Trade in D&D, Implied Sex Work]

Has your OC ever been betrayed by someone they thought they could trust? Has your OC ever betrayed someone who trusted them?

Emerleigh has arguably suffered 2 major betrayals in her life, but at different speeds and intensities.

The first was at the hands of their older sister Hedryn, when she foolishly tried to temporarily sell the twins for passage into the Xanathar Guild for protections from her MANY debts and troubles. This betrayal was swift and painful, seemingly out of nowhere. Someone she deeply trusted turned on her on a dime. Even though Em understands the emotional circumstances better than Eckhart, that doesn't mean she doesn't understand what Hedryn did was unforgivable and extremely painful for them.

Marble is a slow realization over time instead of an instant betrayal. She and Eckhart trusted Marble after he took them in from the slave trade and showered them with gifts and affection. But over time, she grew to realize he was using them and would do anything in his power to keep the two of them in line. It was a painful realization for her, but less intense due to its unravelling nature and the fact Marble always had a "too good to be true" vibe about him. She made the mistake of believing her well-being meant anything to him. Every terrible client or dangerous job he sent their way was a violation of the twins' trust in him.

The only other person Emerleigh has let herself trust is Eckhart, who has never violated that trust. They're all the other has.

Despite knowing the pain of betrayal well, that doesn't mean Emerleigh's without her own victims. After all the Markolac Twins are con artists at Marble's beckon call first and foremost. Exploiting trust is part of the game. As a bard, it's always been her job to enrapture and seduce with her wiles and words, and she's one of the best in the Gate when she puts her mind to it. How fortunate for her conscience that Marble does dirty dealings with some evil bastards.

So, yes, Emerleigh's betrayed a lot of peoples' trust. Whether they deserve it or not isn't as simple an answer.

Eckhart Markolac - Alone

[CW - Codependance, Hypersexuality]

How does your OC deal with loneliness? Have they ever been completely alone before? How do they act when there's no one around to see them?

Eckhart is the funniest and most tragic choice you could've made for this because Eckhart is rarely alone. He's practically glued to Emerleigh's hip, and she's glued to his. If they split up on purpose, it's rarely for longer than an hour or so.

If Eckhart is alone, it's because he's either in Marble's solitary confinement chamber or because Emerleigh is on a job. If he's got no work to keep him busy, he spends his time either in their room (which they share) or out on the town if he's able to sneak out (though the Undercellar has plenty of fun to be had despite it basically being his prison). If he's able to get out, he looks for company in taverns. He either drinks until he starts a fight, spends the night cheating at cards with one-night friends, or getting busy with fellow patrons. You may have noticed, but Eck's hypersexuality is a lot less performative than Em's. She's hypersexual as a method of self-reclamation mixed with some complicated feelings about what's expected of her, while Eckhart does it to distract himself and not feel so godsdamned lonely.

If taverns aren't an option, he fiddles with anything he can find. He hates letting his mind wander because it often goes to a lot of his repressed emotions he's refusing to deal with. He took up cartography, has read every single one of Em's Volothamp Geddarm books (with special focus on the monsters of the open ocean), and one time broke a lute she received as a gift from an admirer when he tried playing it. He mumbles to himself to keep himself busy.

When he's alone on a job, though, that takes all of his mental energy so he doesn't need to fiddle with something or talk to himself.

Most strikingly, Eckhart is stoic when he's alone. He rarely cracks a smile and is more overtly grumpy as opposed to his wry sarcastic streak when he's around people. He doesn't perform being in control when he's alone.

I think if somebody called him codependent, I wouldn't be able to disagree. Eck's not very good at handling life by himself, he can't even pretend to trust others, and that hampers his ability to grow on his own. He's dependent on others to act as a crutch for his personal growth, and acting on his own leads to a kind of emotional atrophy.

THANK YOU FOR ASKING THESE, I HAD A LOT OF FUN COMING UP WITH ANSWERS FOR MY LITTLE ANGST MACHINES