#i chose players based off who people seem to notice how i draw noses for

[neonfretra]

(plain text transcript below the cut)

some thoughts on i draw the noses of players because i like yapping about my process ^_^ unfortunately i think exclusively in mspaint diagrams

[Transcript start:

i like to think of the profile of the nose in 3 parts

[Image: Simple drawing of Brandon Montour's nose. It has a prominent nose bump with a smooth downwards curve. The outward slant of the nose beneath the brow bone is labelled the nasal bone. The flat plane of the body of the nose is labelled the lateral cartilage. The tip of the nose is labeled the major alar cartilage.]

[Image: Simple drawing of Matty Beniers's nose. Compared to Montour, his nose is at a steeper downwards slope.]

the main thing that changes between different noses is length + slope of each section

& the concavity/convex...ity of each part

[Image: Simple drawing of Shane Wright's nose. His nose is shorter than both the prior mentioned players, with a more defined upwards tip.]

at the end of the day though i draw with a semi-realistic style + this covers only one angle. your mileage with this one may vary

End transcript.]

[thiswasinevitableid]

“Listen you need to dance with me right now” pairing and scenario of your choice

Here you go! I went with Indruck and a college-ish AU

“Listen, you need to dance with me right now”

Duck turns around in the black pleather booth and finds a man about his age, silvery hair tousled out at odd angles and red glasses perched on his nose, smiling at him nervously. 

“Not beatin around the bush are you?” He smirks.

“Huh? Oh, ah, this is not a flirtation attempt, Ah, that is, not that you are unappealing, just, nevermind, this was foolish.”

He turns away, and Duck grabs his elbow, “whoah, hey, didn’t say I wasn’t interested. Not about to turn down a dance from a cute guy.”

Tension drains from the man’s shoulders as Duck stands leads them towards the strobing light of the dance floor, “Thank goodness. Wait, what did you say?”

“I said” Duck pulls him close as the current song winds down, “I think you’re cute, sugar.”

“There’s no need to pretend that’s true. As I said, this isn’t about flirtation.” 

“Then what is it about?”

His new friend thinks as the tempo grinds down to slow beat, couples flowing on and off the floor around them. It’s the kind of gay bar where anyone who falls under the rainbow banner can go to look for a partner. Duck himself is on the hunt for something to banish the taste of a bad break-up from his mouth. 

His original plan for the night involved sitting in the dark in his bedroom, watching nature documentaries until he no longer felt the dull heartbreak oozing in his chest. But Juno, his roommate, insisted he come with her for a night on the town.  So he’d settled on a new plan: get laid by someone who likes hairy guys with some fat on top of their muscle in hopes of not remembering all his insecurities, ones drilled deeper under his skin by his exes parting words. 

The man currently holding his hands with all the confidence of a freshman at their first homecoming dance hadn’t been on his radar until a minute ago. For the life of him, Duck can’t figure out why. Sure, he’s weird and messy, but he’s so singular looking Duck’s amazed everyone in the room isn’t trying to cut in.

“It’s about keeping you safe.” The man whispers, jarring him from his thoughts, their proximity the only reason Duck can hear him over the music. 

“Come again?”

“Do you see that gentleman who just walked in?”

Duck turns them in time to see a blonde man with the build of a water-polo player enter the bar.

“Mr. Salmon T-shirt?”

“Correct. Had you not danced with me, there was a high chance he would ask you instead. All would have gone well until you two decided to use the back alley for some, um, quick relief to the fact you were both very turned on. It would be at this point that he would try something you did not want, you’d push him away, and he would punch you before slinking back inside. I assumed you’d prefer not to end your night with a black eye.”

“Got that right. So if you’re dancin’ with me for my own good, what happens to him?” 

The man’s face goes worryingly blank, then he shakes his head as if clearing it, “he gets very drunk very quickly, starts spouting unkind words at Joseph over there and promptly gets bounced by the bartender.”

Duck snorts, “that’s what he gets for talkin shit near Barclay. Think the only thing that actually makes that man mad is when someone is rude about his boyfriend.”

“That’s my experience as well.”

“You know Barclay too? I mean, not just as a bartender?”

“Correct. You know how he has someone living in a trailer on his land?”

“Yeah? Wait, holy shit, you’re Indrid?”

A nod.

“I’ll be damned, Dani kept sayin she wanted to introduce us. I’m-”

“Duck Newton.” Indrid says along with him.

Okay, that was a little weird. 

“Y’know, s’okay if you actually hold onto me while you’re apparently savin me a fight.”

Indrid presses closer, but his hold on Duck is still light, as if he’s afraid of trapping him. A happy sigh drifts between them.

“You’re so warm. It’s very nice.” Indrid murmurs

Duck draws Indrid’s hand close to his mouth, blowing across the chilly fingers. Another sigh, Indrid actually curling his arm around Duck’s shoulders. He seems to relax when Duck talks, so he says the first thing he can think of.

“You’re in the art grad program, right?”

“Indeed. You’re in forestry, yes?”

“Yep.”

“Fascinating.”

“That ain’t the usual reaction.” Duck smiles up at him, “Once you start talking about tree taxonomy or forest health, people’s eyes start glazin over.”

Indrid cocks his head, “How does one measure the health of something as complex as a forest?”

And so Duck spends two songs explaining the answer, Indrid listening attentively and asking questions. Thank god the DJ is in a slow jam mood, so he doesn’t have to shout about pest control over some sort of horrible, rapid bass-line.  Not wanting to be rude, he spends song number three asking Indrid about how he chose illustration as his focus in his art program.

By the end of the song, Indrid’s left hand has slipped into Duck’s back pocket, and Duck knows he won’t be interested int dancing with anyone else for the rest of the night.

He gives his best sweet southern boy grin and nuzzles Indrid’s cheek. 

“Gotta say, think you win for creative excuses for askin a guy to dance.”

Indrid deflates and hunches in on himself, his hands dropping from Duck’s body, though he otherwise stays put.

“It’s not an excuse. I was just trying to help.”

“Indrid, how could you possibly know what was gonna happen?”

“I just can!” He snaps, recoiling instantly at the sound, “I can see the future. I’ve always been able to. Not that anyone, save for a few close friends, believes me when I tell them.” He pinches the bridge of his nose, “there are no longer futures where you get punched, so I will leave you alone.”

“Indrid, wait, I’m sorry.” 

“It’s alright, Duck, I’m not upset. Enjoy the rest of your night.” Indrid turns away.

“Do you wanna go grab something to eat?” He thought through the offer for exactly zero seconds, but he knows it’s what he wants the moment he says it. 

Indrid blinks at him, then smiles small and odd, “That was...unexpected.”

Duck holds his breath.

“I accept your offer.” The grin is wider now, to the point that it’s a bit unnerving. Indrid must notice, and forces the smile to a normal size, “where would you like to go?”

Duck takes his hand, leading him out into the night and down the street. There’s a Mel’s Diner standing mostly empty on the corner two blocks away, and they slip inside. Duck orders a burger and fries, Indrid an orange creamsicle shake. The taller man’s fingers drum on the Formica table top.

He waffles on what he wants to say, how much he wants to share.

“Sometimes a glowing blue woman appears in my room.” 

Indrid’s eyebrows shoot to the top of his head, “there was only one future where you admitted that.”

“You actually believe me?”

“Of course. Why would you lie about such a thing?”

“I….I dunno.” Duck shrugs, rubbing his forearm, “tried tellin one or two other people and they looked at me like I was losin it. Been happenin since I turned eighteen, along with these weird vision-y dreams. Gets kinda old.”

“And you’re telling me because you think the fact I see the future makes me more likely to believe you.”

“Yeah. Uh, did you see that comin or just connect the dots?”

“Both. I take it you believe me now?” Indrid fiddles with the drawstring on his sweatshirt.

“Did the second I saw how hurt you looked.  Know exactly what bein on the wrong side of disbelief feels like.” Duck pauses as the server sets down their food, “Let me buy you dinner as an apology?”

“Gladly.” Indrid sips his milkshake, and Duck freezes mid-bite at the way his cheeks hollow and the little sigh of pleasure he lets out.

Indrid catches him staring, and licks his lips with a smirk. Duck hides behind his burger. 

“So, uh, why were you at the bar?”

“Bear hunting.” Indrid deadpans. It’s only when a blush splashes up Duck’s cheeks that he breaks into a smile, “I’m kidding. Mostly. I’ve been trying to get out more. I can be a bit reclusive, as I like my privacy and my hobbies and coursework are all solitary. You?”

“Gettin over an ex.” He shoves fries into his mouth, not quite ready to say more. Somehow that topic is even more intimidating than revealing his weird powers. Indrid nods in understanding, polishing off the first half of his shake with terrifying speed. Roy Orbison wails “Only the Lonely” from the Jukebox.

“Hardly the music for it. Hmm” Indrid flips through the options on the table-side music selector. The pink and blue neon flashes through the window and along the angles of his face. He looks so ethereal.

Duck is so screwed.

“Ah, here we are.” Indrid digs into his pocket, pulling out a quarter and dropping it into the machine. 

After a few moments, a voice croons from the speakers.

Love me tender, love me sweet

“Fan of the classics, huh?” Duck rests his elbow on the table and his cheek in his palm.

“I find Elvis and his contemporaries pleasant to draw to.”

“Know what else they’re good for?” Duck bounces his eyebrows. 

“Yes, but I want to hear you say it anyway.”

Duck slides out of the booth, holds out his hand, “Dance with me?”

Indrid takes it, and this time he doesn’t hesitate. His arms drape around Duck, and his head nestles onto his shoulder.

Duck sways them in time with the song, arms around Indrid’s waist. 

“Indrid?”

“Hmm?”

“I meant what I said earlier. About you bein cute. And I really like talkin with you. Would you, uh, wanna go on a date sometime?”

Chapped lips find the base of his neck, and Indrid kisses a slow line up until they’re gazing at each other. 

“Nothing would make me happier, Duck.”

Duck draws his fingers along Indrid’s face, leans in and kisses him in time with the fading melody.

“In that case, sugar, how about you and I go dancing tomorrow night?”

[cloudchaserandflitterexplain]

Cloudchaser and Flitter Explain: Their top 10 Defenders of Equestria cards

You guess? Did something go wrong?

No…

Then what’s wrong, Cloudchaser?

It’s just that...

There are so many good cards in this set! Cutting them down to just ten meant I wouldn’t be able to mention a lot of my favorites and even ordering the ten I do have was really hard and I’m still not sure it’s the order I want them to be in and—

Boop.

Feel better now?

Did… did you just boop my nose?

Hi everypony! Have you been enjoying Defenders of Equestria so far? I know I have!

And considering how hard it is to get Cloudchaser to stop talking about the set, I’m pretty sure she’s been enjoying it too.

You can’t just boop someone’s nose like that…

In fact, you might even say we’ve been enjoying the set a bit too much! It’s about time for us to make our traditional top 10 favourite card lists after all.

And Defenders is so full of awesome, it was really hard for me to pick only ten cards to talk about. And something tells me Cici had just as much trouble as I did! Didn’t you, Cloudchaser?

I mean, what would Equestria be like if ponies just walked up to each other willy-nilly and just… boop.

Okay... I seem to have completely shattered my best friend’s brain. Give me a moment to try and fix this.

Gah!

You booped my nose again…

Well I needed to do something! We’ve got top 10 lists to share with every pony.

Care to do the honors by sharing your first card with everypony?

Oh, uh, sure.

So to start things off, I’m putting Maud Pie: Counteroffer at number 10.

Now this card may surprise a few people. As, well, she has most of the qualifications for a card that I’d be inclined to say is not good at all for competitive play. She costs 5 for one thing, which is a huge investment for a card unless it gives you a massive advantage.

Which brings us to her ability set. Which, if you ask me, is not at all worth that 5 AT pricetag. Exhausting an opposing character during your Main Phase is pretty underwhelming at the best of times, and there are typically better ways to get +1 counters than when you flip a card.

So yeah, I’d say she’s pretty bad in a vacuum. Close to unplayable outside of a casual environment.

But if you add one other card to the equation, namely Big Mac: Princess for a Night, she becomes ridiculously good. So good, ponies have already been building around the combo.

Ponies like Gyro, which should tell you something.

Oh, so you’ve seen the deck?

Yup! I really liked the idea!

Though I’d probably hate to actually play against it.

Anyway, if you haven’t caught the combo yet, these two friends let you flip your entire deck. Start a Faceoff involving Big Mac and flip a card. Maud will then a put a +1 power counter on him, which lets him spend it to flip another card which lets Maud put a counter on him and so on.

Now, you might be thinking “okay, so this lets you flip your deck and win a faceoff by a lot. So what?” Which is a fair question to ask. Well, two things.

First off, it lets you stack the order of your deck. So you know exactly what you’re going to draw and flip for the rest of the game. And you can even restack the deck in a future faceoff, if you need to.

The other thing is you get to flip every Chaos card in your deck!

Yup. And that’s where her true power lies. There are a lot of powerful chaos abilities right now. And with the right selection of chaos abilities, as well as the correct other cards, you can basically win the game right then and there. Hence why ponies are building around her.

So yeah, she might not look like much at first glance, but she’s actually pretty strong.

Just like a rock.

Well, my number ten pick is nothing like Cici’s, but what else is new, hehe. I went ahead and chose Ravers: Glowsticks Optional!

Just look at those happy ponies! Makes me wish I was there with them. They’re having so much fun!

Almost as much fun as I have making millions of Earth Pony tokens with their ability!

...Have you actually literally made millions?

Don’t be silly, Cici. That’d take forever to put them all into play.

I just stop at the first couple thousand or so.

Of course. How silly of me.

Oh, and because some ponies miss this when they first see the card, but Ravers actually make tokens when you play them. They trigger themselves!

Which just makes sense, cause you can’t have a rave without lots and lots of ponies participating! So naturally they’d bring friends with them when they first arrive.

And the party keeps going with new friends coming and going all the time. Everypony on the dance floor!

I’ll, um. I’ll stay home, thanks.

That’s okay. Ravers work wherever they are! Even from home!

So they can bring the party to you.

...I’m going to move on to the next card.

So I just got done talking about a 5 cost, 3 req, 5 power Orange Earth Pony. And, well, I guess I’m not done doing that since my next pick is Applejack: Captain of the Seven Seas.

Yar har har. Shiver me timbers, be that an ultra rare I see? Yar har har.

Uh… sure.

Again, normally I wouldn’t really want to pay 5 AT for just one friend. You can usually do more with your AT than just that. But, in this case? The effect is absolutely worth it.

Basically this is a mono-Orange Party of One.

Sure, there are a few differences. like the fact that this affects resources and Troublemakers too, or the fact that both players get to keep things instead of just one player, but the principle is pretty similar. And a single colour Party of One is pretty nuts.

Now, yes. There are times you won’t want to play this. Like if your opponent has fewer friends than you, or you just can’t afford to get rid of your board state, or whatever. But that was true of Party of One too. And the times that you do want to play her? Well, it’s proven to be very effective.

Very, very effective… I may have been on the receiving end of Captain AJ a few times now.

Plus whenever you play her, you have an excuse to talk like a pirate for the rest of the game. Yar har har! Avast! Dead ponies tell no tales!

Okay, you are having way too much fun with this.

Silence, scurvy dog! Or else I be making ye sleep with the fishes.

Heh, you’d have to catch me first.

Oh, I’ll catch you, don’t worry about that.

But I should probably continue with my next card. Which is Pinkie’s Present!

Which is the first Song card I’ve put on these lists! What’s wrong with me, I love the song cards!

Ah well, problem solved now, hehe.

So this is on the list mostly just because I like the song. It’s just fun! Who doesn’t love presents or spending time with friends, hehe.

Though it also has a friend borrowing mode, and that’s one of my favourite things to do in this game. And the other options aren’t bad either!

It’s just a fun card with fun art based on a fun song!

Bit of a shame I couldn’t find room on the list for more songs, though, since they’re all pretty fun somehow. But oh well.

Eh, I would have gone with It’s Gonna Work myself if I was going to put a song on today’s list, but yeah, that’s a fine card too.

Anyway, my number eight card is Tri-Horned Bunyip: Elusive Myth.

Three Super or Ultra Rare cards in a row, huh Cici? Is every card on your list going to be shiny?

What? No!

...It’s just a coincidence.

I’m just giving you a hard time, Cici. Go on with your list.

Anyway it’s no secret that I love aggro. And a key part of aggro decks is point acceleration. Something basically only Blue and White had before Defenders. Which basically meant to be competitive and also be playing aggro, you had to be playing Blue, White, or both.

But with the introduction of Bunyip, Yellow’s got it now too! And this is actually pretty good point acceleration at that. 1 AT for 1 point is pretty fantastic. And it’s much easier to get that point than, say, Night Glider: Overpowering’s points.

Now sure, you do frighten Bunyip to do it. But that’s pretty minor.

Let’s compare to Rarity: Truly Outrageous, who does something pretty similar and is more or less universally considered to be a good card. With RTO, you move her home to score points. It then normally takes you 2 AT to move her back. Similarly, it costs you 2 AT to rally Bunyip. Same cost.

Yeah, there are other differences. RTO has less req, so can be used more easily if White is your off colour, and cares about higher bonus problems, for example. Plus she has 2 power, and it costs you to same amount to score points off her next turn even if you started a faceoff, while it’d take 3 AT to get Bunyip to a problem and unfrightened. And so on.

But Bunyip has advantages too. 1 initial cost is pretty cheap, and there are a few cards that care about 1 cost friends, like Find the Music In You or Pinkie Pie: One Filly Party. Plus, being a critter plays nicely with several of Yellow’s other strategies.

And most importantly, it’s in Yellow, a colour that otherwise has no point acceleration at all. That’s really the most important part.

It’s just a good card. And shouldn’t be underestimated.

My number eight pick is an Ultra Rare too! And let me tell you something…

Evil doers better run and hide because the protectors of a great nation are here to fight.

The Defenders of Spiketopia: Magic and Might!

...Not the nation I thought you were talking about, I admit.

Hey, imaginary nations can be great nations too!

Defenders of Spiketopia is great! Not only does it have my favourite art in the entire set, with everypony striking a cool pose, but it’s also got a whopping five different traits!

With trait icons to match, hehe. I bet they had to bust out something special to handle that!

Honestly it just annoys me that the trait icons aren’t in the same order as they are listed.

Huh? They aren’t?

They aren’t!

Yeah, I noticed it right away. It’s super minor, but man does it bug me for some reason.

Oh well. It’s still a super fun card with cool art!

...Aren’t you forgetting something?

Hrm? No, don’t think so.

What about their abilities?

Oh, I don’t care about that at all, honestly. Farming’s not my style. I just like the art and the traits, hehe. And I guess also the fact that their name references the actual set name, which is cute.

Though a bit confusing since we also have a Defenders of Equestria card… Ah well.

What’s next, Cici?

That would be my number seven pick, Changeling Mimics: Unreasonable Facsimiles.

I have the sneaking suspicion I should put this card higher on my list… but I dunno, this just seems to be the place for it.

Which says something about the rest of the cards on the list, because Mimics is really good.

Paying +3 AT to play any cards of the chosen type is pretty huge. You may as well not be able to play them at all, that’s such a huge tax. And unlike Octavia: Harsh Judge, you don’t need to know exactly what the opponent has in their hand, just what they’re likely to have in their hand.

Now, most of the time, you’re going to choose event with this card. Events are the cards that can be played on both players’ turns, and are far more common than either resources or troublemakers. But don’t discount the other options either.

Dilemmas are resources while not in play, for example, and players aren’t going to want to play them at +3 AT. Similarly, Singing Barrel, one of the most common forms of entry in the game, is really difficult to use if it suddenly costs 4.

And of course, making Troublemakers cost 4 makes it a bit more painful to play an epic to get rid of the Mimics due to uniqueness. Not impossible, of course, just expensive.

But let’s face it, that’s just a bonus. You’re almost always going to name event because it’s generally going to be the most useful. The other options are just icing on the cake.

Oh, and don’t forget the 6 power. They even do a decent job of protecting themselves against Friends due to being big. Though not so large they’re insurmountable.

I’m just glad they have a bonus higher than 0 so if you defeat them, you get something out of it.

Oh yeah, good point. It does have a drawback.

But then again, it’d have to. It’d be pretty insane without a drawback of some kind.

And even with the drawback, I think it’s the best non-epic Troublemaker we’ve seen in awhile.

What about Tantabus?

That doesn't count. It wasn’t good because it was a Troublemaker, it was good because of its chaos.

Well, speaking of Tantabus, I hope you’re ready to have nightmares…

Because my number seven pick, Zomponies: Terrifying Infestation, is coming to town!

OOOooOoOOoooOoOOoooO!

It kind of spoils the spooky factor when you smile like that.

These horrifying ponies have eaten so many cookies, it did something terrifying to them. Muzzles eternally stained by the objects of their undying desire, they roam all of Ponyville in search of even more tasty cookies to devour. But no matter how many they eat, their cursed hunger never diminishes.

Or maybe it was just one giant prank at Rainbow Dash’s expense, hehe. One of the two!

Yeah, it was that second one. Everypony was in on it, Flits, it’s not like you’re telling anypony anything they don’t already know.

Not everypony! Only those of us here in Ponyville.

Shouldn’t you be talking about the card?

I am, silly! The card comes with the story!

Plus it’s kind of fun just frightening everything over and over. Sure, there are better ways, but none that are so ripe with the ability to tell ghost stories while you do so.

Well, uh, besides Spooky Scary Story, I guess. Or Rainbow Dash: Goosebump Giver.

But hey, why not run them all? The perfect deck to play against somepony if you’re going camping and need an excuse to tell scary stories!

Do ponies really bring card games with them when they go camping?

Probably not. But hey, now that we gave everypony the idea, maybe somepony will!

You are one weird pony, Flitter.

Guilty as charged.

Well, let’s move on. My number six pick is Turning Point.

Now I know what some of you are going to say.

“Turning Point isn’t as good as Cracking the Case.”

And yeah, you’re right. It’s not. Immediate timing is insanely good, and banishing is always better than just dismissing. If you have the option of running one or the other, you should definitely pick Cracking the Case.

That being said, I still absolutely nove this card.

1 AT to dismiss a TM during the Main Phase by itself would be already the second best TM buster in the game right now, after Cracking the Case. Yes, even better than Epic Win, in my opinion.

Not only does being 3 req make it substantially easier to cast than Epic Win’s 4, but Main Phase timing is way better than Troublemaker Phase.

Having Main Phase timing means that if you pay AT to draw it, you can play it immediately to confront that turn without the opponent being able to mess with it somehow on their turn. Also, 1AT is about as cheap as you can get for this kind of effect.

And this card does more than that! The optional ability to discard a card to borrow a TM permanently is huge!

Especially if you borrow the card CIci was just talking about, hehe.

Yup. Suddenly it’s not you who has to pay +3 to play cards, but your opponent!

And that’s not the only good TM to borrow. Yellow Parasprite, Rarity: Hoarder, and so on are pretty solid candidates since now you’re getting the benefit instead of them.

Really, borrowing any non-epic TM can be worth it. So long as it prevents the opponent from confronting for a turn or two while letting you confront.

Sadly, there are no epic TMs that benefit you for borrowing them, really. You’re probably just better off dismissing them.

Good thing the card can do that too.

Heh, yeah. Good thing.

Anyway, I’m really pleased with this card and feel its utility is great. I look forward to using it in all my Yellow aggro decks.

Well, I look forward to making super big friends with my number six pick, Trixie: Smoke and Mirrors!

Playing events is fun and making big friends is fun, and this card lets you do both! She can get super big super fast.

One event makes her 4 power. Two events means 8 power. And ten events? A whopping 2,048 power! Twenty events? Over a million. A hundred events?

Two nonillion, five hundred thirty-five octillion, three hundred one septillion, two hundred sextillion, four hundred fifty-six quintillion, four hundred fifty-eight quadrillion, eight hundred two trillion, nine hundred ninety-three billion, four hundred six million, four hundred ten thousand, seven hundred fifty-two power!

Which is good enough to win most faceoffs, let me tell you, hehe.

...How do you even know that?

What do you think Rainbowshine and I have been doing these past few weeks?

Making stupidly large Trixies?

Amongst other things, yes!

Why?

To see if we could!

To be honest, we could have gone higher if we wanted to! But a hundred and one events just seemed excessive.

Whatever makes you happy, I guess?

Now maybe working together with your opponent to make nonillion plus power Trixies isn’t your cup of tea, much like it isn’t Cloudchaser’s. But it’s still pretty fun to see just how big you can make her when playing a normal game.

Plus she’s a unicorn and a changeling, despite being one pony! You gotta love fun flavour like that.

So wait…

Trixie is actually a changeling?

No, silly! The other Trixie is Thorax.

Oh. Right. I knew that.

Your turn!

Well my fifth pick doesn’t have the ability to breach a million power…

Nonillion.

...But I think it’s still pretty awesome.

In fact, it can easily stop that giant friend with ease. I’m talking about Belly Flop.

SPLOOSH!

So Belly Flop is probably the best removal card in the game right now. For 1 AT, you can dismiss just about every friend in the game at Immediate timing. That’s insane.

Sure, you do have to retire a friend to play it…

But Pink has no shortage of ways to make friends. Whether it’s an Earth Pony Token, someone you want to retire like Party Favor: Balloon Master, or simply a friend at home you’re no longer using, chances are you’ll have somepony you don’t mind retiring.

Of course, the best way to use it is to combine it with borrowing effects like Pinkie’s Present, which lets you retire your opponent’s friend to dismiss another opponent’s friend. This is ridiculously strong.

And fun! Well, for you. Your opponent might grumble a bit.

Not really much else to say. Just super solid removal that I expect to see an awful lot of in the immediate future, if not forever.

Well, I won’t let your dive bombing Trixies ruin my plans to make the biggest friends ever. Because my number five pick is Cheerilee: Cheerileeder!

Uhh, how does she stop me from ruining your plans?

Well, she doesn’t.

I just wanted to emphasize I like making the biggest friends ever!

Oooookay, then.

Anyway, Cheerilee is great! If you’ve got a giant friend at home, you can use that giant friend to make another giant friend even gianter!

Why have one friend at nonillion plus power when you could have two?

With one of them at home…

I just played a hundred events, you think I can’t spare a couple AT to move my Trixie at home?

Fair point.

Even without silly plans to make giant friends, it’s just fun moving power around! It’s like your friends are all working together to help each other confront those problems! How fun is that?

Not to mention Cheerilee looks amazing in her cheerleader outfit. And she’s so happy!

You just put this card on here for the art, didn’t you?

Maaaaybe. I’ll never tell!

Moving on to my number four pick, we have Gabby: Lending a Claw.

Getting into the really good cards now.

Oh, I like Gabby! She’s so helpful and cheerful!

Well, her card is definitely helpful, that’s for sure. The longer a game goes on, the more likely it is you’re going to run out of cards in hand. But Gabby here helps with that pretty amazingly.

More cards in hand means more options, after all. And Gabby ensures you always end your turn with at least four. Which is great for aggro decks that try to play a lot of cards in any given turn.

Not that you’d know anything about that.

Huh? I play aggro all the time.

That’s the joke, silly.

Oh… right.

Anyway, Gabby’s potential to keep you going in the mid to late game without resorting to having to pay to draw is pretty great. Four cards is a lot. You won’t usually get to draw a full four, since you’ll have five on your next turn, but even drawing just two cards off of her is fantastic.

She is basically worth running in any Pink deck that plays lots of cards.

Unless, of course, you’re using Vinyl. She can keep your hand full all on her own, so Gabby’s not needed.

Which kinda puts her in this weird space where she’s best as an off colour friend since if you’re playing a competitive deck with a Pink Mane, you’re almost certainly using Vinyl.

Good thing she’s only got 2 req then, huh?

Definitely.

By the way, Cici…

Have you happened to hear the new hit song that’s been the rage all across Equestria lately?

Oh, you mean Coloratura’s latest hit? Yeah, it’s great! I love everything she does!

Nope, not Coloratura!

Uhh…. Sapphire Shores then? She’s okay, but she’s got nothing on Coloratura.

I’m so pleased I got to actually help out with the preparations when she came to Ponyville! Seeing her in concert was great.

I’m not talking about a Coloratura song, Cici!

Sheesh.

Well, who’s it by, then?

Ponyville’s very own princess!

Huh. I didn’t know that Twilight—

Wait.

I see where this is going.

Sweep Sweep Sweep!

My number four pick.

How did I not see this coming sooner?

You were too busy fangirling all over Coloratura, hehe.

I wasn’t fangirling...

Anyway, I really don’t have much to say about the card. It’s just got a fun name referencing a silly little bit in Princess Twilight’s history, hehe.

And it never fails to make me laugh! I just love it.

Not sure why they didn’t just actually make it a Song, though. I mean, it even says it’s a song right there in the title!

Maybe because it’s not a song?

Sure it is!

Sweep sweep sweep sweep sweep.

Repeating one word over and over doesn’t make it a song.

Sweep sweep sweep sweep sweep.

Knock it off already.

Sweep sweep sweep sweep sweep!

Anyway, moving on to my number three pick…

Once again, I had some trouble organizing the top 3. They’re all really powerful cards, and picking which one was the best was pretty hard.

But after careful consideration, I came up with this particular list. And I’m pretty pleased with the outcome.

Enough Buildup, Cici! Which card is number three?

Heh, alright then. Sweetie Belle: Most Traditional gets the slot.

I was very close to putting her in the number one slot too. Just because of how versatile she is.

She does so many things. She can get rid of cards you don’t want to draw or flip. She can help you with faceoff math by knowing what you or your opponent is going to flip next, and if there’s any chaos on those cards. She can even get rid of the opponent’s chaos cards to ensure they don’t flip them!

Though, truth be told, the best way to use her is to control what the opponent draws. Pitch all the stuff you don’t want them to have and give them the stuff you’re okay with them having.

If you’re really confident, you can even let them draw good cards just so you know what they have. Sometimes knowing exactly what’s in their hand can be stronger than getting rid of the good cards. Just because hand knowledge is important.

Don’t forget she’s Stubborn too!

Yeah! You get to do all that and still have her help you confront in the process! She’s pretty nuts.

I’ve seen her take control of games almost single hoofed. The opponent has a much harder time drawing cards they actually want, and almost never gets to draw a way to actually deal with the situation ever again. She is seriously a huge threat.

And don’t even get me started on multiple copies of her. Now you can use one to control their draws while also using the second to control their flips, or help smooth out your draws, or just super ensure the opponent doesn’t get what they want.

It can get kind of gross.

Mostly I just use her to discard the opponent’s entire deck.

Yeah, that’s actually an option too. If you’re getting close to the end game, you may want to switch to just discarding cards from their deck to ensure they run out of tools, be they ones you hoof picked for them or not. Which makes her a huge control tool and also a win condition rolled into one.

Well, sorta. You still need to actually score points after the opponent has no deck, but they’ll have very little way to stop you at that point.

Anyway, that’s more of a secondary function, though. And only when the opponent is down to like fifteen or so cards left in their deck.

If you just use her that way to start off, you’re unlikely to do much unless your deck is entirely dedicated to discarding the opponent’s deck, which is difficult to pull off.

Psh, says you. I do it all the time!

Yeah, well, we have different playstyles.

Anyway, that’s about it for Sweetie Belle.

Though I guess it’s also worth mentioning she’s useful if you’re trying to get specific cards into your discard pile. White is good at playing cards directly from the discard pile, after all. Orange White especially.

There’s probably a deck idea in there somewhere, though I haven’t found it yet myself.

Hehehe.

What?

You’ll see!

Well, let’s move on to my top three! And we get to start with Baby Flurry Heart: Newborn Nightmare.

Ugh, not this card.

Rules Nightmare is more like it, if you ask me.

As you can see, Cici hates this card. But I absolutely love it!

Randomness is fun! Not knowing what’s going to happen can be exciting sometimes. Will your friend move? Or will they stay still? Who knows!

Yeah, but she doesn’t work like anypony expects her to.

See, assuming there are no dilemmas, there are four total locations in the game. Your home, your problem, the opponent’s home, and the opponent’s problem. And Flurry looks at all four as a possible area to move the character to.

And if she picks an invalid location, like the opponent’s home or the place the character already is, the friend stays still. Meaning you tried to move a friend for absolutely no benefit.

Exactly! She causes chaos! And that’s fun!

It’s frustrating.

Sometimes frustrating is fun, though.

Wah?

Don’t think about it too hard, hehe. Just go into you number two!

Heh, that I can do. My second favourite card is definitely Spitfire: Drilling It In.

Talk about a card that does it all, she’s got a whopping four abilities, and they’re all great.

You all probably already know how good Prince Rutherford is, which is to say phenomenal. The ability to frighten at immediate speed and also get power in play is pretty great. He even bypasses event hate like The Vote.

And Spitfire does that too.

Of course, she does cost an extra AT, and you have to discard a card to do it.

But the effect is still worth it. Especially since you’re not losing anything for the extra AT cost. She’s still 3 AT for 3 power. Or more, thanks to her Experienced. And she’s in two colours, which is always a plus.

And that’s not even all she does! She also lets you draw a card when she’s put into the discard from anywhere. So if you discard Spitfire to another copy of her, you get a 4 power friend in play and still the same number of cards in hand!

Her ability also works if she’s put into the discard from your deck. Like say, from Sweetie Belle.

Yeah. She’s just an incredibly versatile card with a ton of applications, all of which are really great.

And Cloudchaser’s totally not just saying that cause she’s trying to suck up to Spitfire to get pulled from the reserves and become a Wonderbolt proper.

Huh? Of course not. Spitfire doesn’t even play the game.

Soarin does, though. Oh, and Surprise. Few others too.

Are they any good?

Eh. Surprise seems to have a knack for it, but only ever plays mono Pink. And Soarin is…

Well, he tries.

Well, maybe you should give him some pointers, huh?

Yeah, I help out where I can.

Anyway, enough about Wonderbolts! Let’s focus on my second favourite card from the set: Starlight Glimmer: Taking Charge.

Of course you’d pick a Redeem card.

Starlight is super fun, since she lets you play a Friend for free every single turn, provided you meet its requirement. This lets you play all sorts of expensive Friends you wouldn’t be able to otherwise!

Sure. Just as soon as you pay her 8 AT cost.

Oh, wait a second, you can reduce that to 5 by retiring another Starlight which cost you a card and at least one more AT, such a good deal.

Your sarcasm is noted.

Look, Redeem is just a bad mechanic, okay? 3 AT is barely worth the initial investment and the cards are nigh unplayable without the discount. Even with the discount, they’re still pretty obnoxious to play since you need your cards to line up just so, and you can’t really count on it..

I’m pretty sure they’re the worst Ultra Rares printed. Period.

Oh hush. I like them.

They may not be competitive at all, but it’s a neat little flavor thing! And their effects are huge, which is cool!

Plus, who says I pay 8 or even 5 AT to play her? I only pay 3!

Huh? How?

Redeeming Qualities, silly!

Or a similar effect. But usually Redeeming Qualities.

Just get her into the discard using the Sweetie Belle Cici mentioned earlier, or Apple Bloom: Re-Markable, and you’re in a great position to redeem her without actually using Redeem!

Okay, that sounds a little fun, yeah.

And then you get to play free friends forever!

Or until the opponent dismisses her. Which happens a lot for some strange reason, hehe.

And since her ability specifically says you’re playing the Friend, she even lets the other Redeem Friends do their thing! So you can totally re-enact their daring trip through the Changeling Hive!

I’ll stick to my decks, thanks.

But I guess there’s a little bit more there than I thought. Still not a fan, though.

Well, that’s it for my number two! All that’s left are our absolute favourites.

The bestest cards in the set!

At least, in our opinions, anyway.

What’s yours, Cici?

Oh, it’s a good one.

Now, when I first saw this card, I instantly knew she was going to be good. She just has value written all over her.

That being said, I never would have guessed she’d have topped my list at the time. But the more I played with her, the more I realized she wasn’t just good, she was deceptively powerful in what she allowed me to do.

So without any further buildup, my absolute favourite card of the set is Angel Wings: Friendly Fan.

A wonderbolt in both your top two spots?

Are you sure you’re not playing favourites, hehe.

It’s a coincidence, I swear!

She’s just a really good card…

Well, tell everypony why you think so!

Well, it’s pretty simply, really. She accelerates your gameplan to crazy degrees.

Being 1/1 req lets you play her off of any Pink or Blue Mane with either Trading Traditions or any entry friend of the other colour. Meaning it’s incredibly easy to play her turn 2. And since makes your next friend cost 2 less, she’s effectively 2 free power. Which is just amazing for an aggro deck.

With just a single copy of Angel Wings, it’s not too hard to DFO on turn 2 without even setting yourself back at all! I see it all the time with both Pink and Blue Manes. Assuming the opponent’s problem is easy to confront, anyway.

And occasionally, even if you don’t want to DFO or can’t DFO that early, she can be useful just getting out your high req friends a turn earlier.

I’ve seen both Rainbow Dash: On Even Ground and Snips & Snails: Problem Solvers played turn 1 off of an Angelwings. Both of which can disrupt the opponent’s early game strategies pretty hard if they’re not expecting it.

But it’s not just amazing early game plays that makes her so good. 2 free power is good no matter when in the game you are, provided you’re trying to DFO. She makes it so easy.

Heh. I can’t even recall the number of times my opponent has said to me something like “You can only win if you can DFO this turn, but I don’t think you have the power" only for me to surprise them by playing an Angel Wings or two to create huge amounts of power for almost no AT.

She is just that fast!

And of course, providing power in two different colours means she’s great at confronting any problems you’re likely to throw into your Blue/Pink deck. Not to mention she helps unlocking the req for your other friends since her own requirement is so low.

And don’t even get me started on chaining her. Playing two or even all three of her in one turn is just gross.

So what you’re trying to say is she’s a good card.

What I’m trying to say is she is an amazing card! And alongside Spitfire and a slew of other great Pink and Blue cards from this set, I am absolutely looking forward to playing Pink/Blue aggro this year.

It’s going to be an absolute blast!

I’ll bet!

I also appreciate that your list has 2 cards of each rarity, hehe. Kinda wish my list was like that!

Huh, is it? Just a coincidence, really.

But it kinda goes to show the power level of the set when there’s strong stuff across all rarities. And I thought Marks in time was an insane set.

Well, we’ve seen 19 cards so far, and all that’s left is my number one pick. Can anypony guess what it is?

Us?

Nope! As amazing as it is to see us on cards, it’s happened a million times by now so it’s kind of lost it’s novelty.

Which isn’t to say I don’t like seeing us on cards or anything. In fact, I hope they continue that trend! It’s just not my favourite card this time. Not even to the point where I’m going to ban it from the list preemptively.

Besides, this time it doesn’t have adorable pictures of you as a filly with flavour text explaining your deep dark past!

Flitterrrrr. Stop bringing that up!

Anyway, no, my actual favourite card of Defenders of Equestria is Sunset Festival!

Oh, hrm, yeah. That makes sense. It combines randomness with borrowing. Two of your favourite things.

Sure does!

I never know which Friend I’ll wind up borrowing, but it’s gonna be somepony! And that’s just fun!

Maybe it’ll be entry and not help me at all. Or maybe it’ll be the best Friend in my opponent’s deck. or maybe it’ll be Captain AJ and I’ll have to end the Sunset Festival early because everypony was dismissed.

Who knows what chaos will be unleashed!

Yeah, that’s exactly why I don’t want to use it myself. But I definitely get why you’d like it.

One time I hit an opponent’s Coco Pommel: Refurbisher. So of course I chose Sunset Festival with her ability and played it again. Only to hit another Refurbisher! And I still had AT, so I played it again. And hit the third Refurbisher!

Wanna guess who I hit the fourth time?

Let me guess, a fourth Refurbisher.

Exactly!

Wha? But that’s cheating!

Not really! It was a Queen Chrysalis: Identity Theft.

Oh. Right. That makes sense.

It was still a pretty silly turn, though.

I was out of AT then, but oh well!

And with that, we’re done with our top 10 lists! Hope you enjoyed them as much as we enjoyed making them!

This was a tough one this time around. I had so many cards to cut…

But yeah, making it was a blast. So much great stuff to talk about.

When we started this you were freaking out about it. Feeling better now then?

Yeah, guess so.

Although…

You don’t think I put too many Pink cards on the list, do you? I had 4 counting the multi-coloured cards.

I wouldn’t worry about it. Your list is your list! As long as you’re honest, nothing wrong with what’s on it.

Fair enough.

Although, come to think of it, I had a lot of Pink on my list too…

Guess Pink was an impactful colour for both of us, this time around hehe.

Anyway, that’s all for today. Thanks for taking the time to let us share our favourite cards with you all. Bye everypony! See you all soon!

Later.

[omgnsfwisnsfw-blog]

10: One and One

To some, a delay would invite the possibilities of losing focus. To some, maybe anticipation turns to an overeagerness to just get to it. That overeagerness is like a sugar high and the subsequent crash. He couldn’t speak for his partner, but for John the concept of time was just a little blurred. The goal for him remained the same as always: to succeed. That means procuring the Television championship. That means kicking off NSFW the right way. So here he was. Trying to figure out just how to do that. The small text on the glowing screens strained his eyes so he adjusted the pair of narrow framed reading glasses on the bridge of his nose to minimize that impact. He used his index finger and thumb to scroll through a video gallery on the ‘streaming’ network, stopping every once in a while at one of the descriptions. He was seated at the scuffed up wooden round table in her dining room. The other three chairs of various makes were at this point vacant. An open notebook was laid before him and he used his left hand to tap the eraser end of a pencil on the page. All lights were off in the house except for the two bulbs in a glass fixture overhead. John went to press play on the next clip when he heard the front door open. Her steps and movements in the living room were loud and boisterous. She may have announced herself but he was concentrating on the last bullet point on the page. Finally, she stepped into the room he was in and and flicked on the lights via a switch just to the right of the door way. John looked up at her wryly, taking the reading glasses off and carefully folding the arms shut. “I’m hoooooome,” she called out, flopping unceremoniously into the opposite chair. She looked quite happy, and perhaps slightly tipsy. John tucked the glasses into the front pocket of his t-shirt, “how was it?” “Christ, that was great. I got a good feeling about this one, Church. I mean, she’s funny, she’s smart, she’s, okay, a stone cold fox… yeah. She’s shaping up to be a keeper.” “That’s good.” “Yes. Yes it is. You have no idea how fuckin' hard it’s been to find a good woman in this town,” she waved a hand, “Anyway. What’ve you been up to all evening? I mean, obviously you didn’t throw a wild party or nothin’ while I was gone.” John liked that she did her own thing. He was starting to see the enjoyment in what would be a healthy isolated where someone somewhere would eventually just say hello. He closed the notebook, “Homework.” “That so?” she leaned over a bit, giving a cursory glance to the notebook on the table, “Figure it ain’t Trig 1.” “It’s about our job.” “Thought it might be,” she gave her chin a tap, a tic of hers when she was recalling something, “Is that what all the other notebooks are for? Notes? I mean I didn’t read any or nothin’, I just, y’know. Noticed.” “Yes. Most of them are just that. You forgot something,” his tone was without judgment as he placed a small box with a flip open lid on the table in front of him. “Aw, geez, my fuckin’ cigs,” she picked the box up and pocketed it, “Shouldn’t leave those things laying around. Didn’t need ‘em tonight anyway. I really have been trying to cut down.” “We aren’t each other’s keepers - however we are partners,” he flipped the notebook open to the first page. Each line was filled with tiny, precise, neat writing, “when I came back, I was under the impression that muscle memory would be a enough to get by. However, that was not the case. My first weekend back in this business, I failed. It wasn’t just about losing, it was that I embarrassed myself. I gave the impression of being a wash out. I could barely breathe. I was not ready. And of course, there was the issue of time. You can’t defeat time,” he paused, “but that is actually the easiest thing to resolve. It’s like sharpening a knife. It’s been,” he turned two pages, “eight years since you’ve competed full time. Your last appearance was here in your current city of residence at a local outlaw show. Three years ago. You can’t wipe that away but you can treat your body better.” “I know, I know. Seriously, I rarely touch these things anymore. Carry ‘em around mostly out of habit, but nowadays I only light up if something’s really fuckin’ wigging me out. Which I think’s progress, considering I used to be a fuckin’ chainsmoker. But… you’re right. I’ll try harder,” she took the pack out of her pocket and tossed it instead into a nearby drawer. “I get your point. But what do all the notes have t’ do with anything?” “Body and mind. That first night, nobody saw me on my hands and knees wheezing and coughing. Nobody saw me laid out on the concrete for nearly an hour. Here’s what they did see: a tremendously unprepared wrestler outmatched by the vigor of youth. When I started, I could count on my strength and ability to burst through any mistakes that I would make. Twenty years later, I’m a little slower and with none of the experience to show for it,” he turned to the next page, “If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle. That’s from Art of War. So I went back to the drawing board. The red head from last month, she had been on a slide but that doesn’t seem to matter to her, nothing to be honest seemed to matter to her. Her movements were devastating but they were also sloppy. She took one too risks,” two more pages, “and the sadomasochist was powerful and deliberate and despite having an advantage in numbers, he relished too much in the aftermath of his every blow. He gave me time to recover and deliver receipts.” “And he was probably angling to go after your feet.” “Correct. Hobbling one’s leg in this case would have been a very sound strategy.” “Anywho, this is… kinda fucking amazing. You notice this kind of stuff about everyone?” “Not without due diligence. Think about it, Mike. The baseball stuff we watched last night. So what you see on the TV, it’s the end result of deliberate planning. What happens is somethings at the mercy of circumstance and the ability of the player but there is always a plan. The pitcher and the batter. It’s a man trying to hit a ball out of thin air. Look at their eyes. Look at their body language. That is the real game. The opponents have prepared for each other. The batter knows by habit what that pitcher’s worst throw is. The pitcher knows by habit how to make that batter swing just too late. Now who can execute? It’s the same with our sport.” “Holy shit. I didn’t think you were even paying attention, you didn’t seem that into it.” John shrugged, “I couldn’t tell you what the score was. So in the traditional sense, yes, I wasn’t paying attention. But I saw what I wanted to see. After my first defeat, I learned that I was not in shape and I did not know my opposition. After my first few wins, I could see that this was going to be an uphill battle. The idea of training isn’t exclusive to us. All of us should be reviewing tape. All of us should know what each of us is capable off and how to counter it,” finally he turned to the page that he had been writing on earlier, “that is what I am doing now.” “Eh, you didn’t miss much, game was a fuckin’ blowout. Mets gotta figure out how t’ beat the goddamn Braves, that series was a fuckin’ embarrassment,” reaching over to the counter, she grabbed her hat and jammed it on her head. She’d forgone it for her date, “Anyway, on one hand, yeah, you’re absolutely right. BUT. Do we really need t’ put this much work into Team Fuckface? Not t’ tell you what to do, but I’d think this level’a study’d be better placed on Ruthann. Especially after a bye week.” He pushed back in his seat and stood, “That was earlier this afternoon. In a different book. Our debut is what matters at this moment. And on the cover of their book,” he pressed his index finger on the page, “they are vulgar human beings with no redeemable qualities. And as true as they may be, they are not be taken lightly. Like me, the boy is a former collegiate wrestler and under all of those corner cutting measures is the pure base of a professional wrestler. He talks and talks and talks and more often than not, he backs up those works. Angel of Death isn’t just some local big man. He’s a mercenary who accepts payment for blood. He extracts that blood through untapped skill. They are a team in name only. They are one and one and their only chainlink is cash and all of the evils it summons.” He stopped and he could almost predict her response. John sometimes left awkward moments in the air and just as she opened her mouth, he continued, “Graveyards are littered with the bones of the people who are just happy to be at the dance. They loved this sport and many of them were vanquished by the ones who leech onto it like a parasite. We can’t just be good people. We can’t just be on the right side of history. Our love for this business won’t matter. What will matter is knowing who they are, what they do, why they do it, and making sure they don’t take advantage of our perceived weaknesses.” “So we kick their teeth in. But… first we study on how best to fuckin’ kick their teeth in,” she grinned, the one she tended to get when she had designs on ring-related violence. “Y’know, I got the network on the Roku. So we don’t gotta hunch over our phones. Want me to bring up anything in particular, or do we start from the beginning?” “From the beginning,” he started towards the living room and stopped short at the door way, “The boy’s official debut. I eliminated him. He chose to run his mouth before that and made many enemies. I picked the bones. If I knew what I knew now, he would have left much earlier. Watch his eyes. Not what he does. Everything he does is crisp and nearly perfect. His eyes in the most perilous moments betray his actions and if we play it right, they’ll betray him next Friday, too.” “Gotcha.” “And big man. So happy to do something on his own when he uses his unbelievable strength to toss out that strange little man who thought no-one was watching when he snuck out of the show last Friday with other people’s belongings. Look at him when the boy takes all of the credit and never bothers to come to his aid just before he was dumped out." John turned back around to face her. He held one finger up from each hand. "That is the essence of Collateral Damage. One and one.” “Not like us,” Mike said it with absolute certainty.