#i cant wait for the tv of debut i really wanna see what she has to say

[milfygerard]

does taylor have a single debut song on any of the playlists?

[neocityarchive]

dear dream (ldh) | part 1

word count: 2.8k

warnings: language

chapter summary: Horrible as it may sound, but it seemed as if you were starting to forget what it was like to love him.

a/n: so there’s a lot of narration in the beginning but pls be patient :> ajdaskl also please let me know what you think. thank u, love u.

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You were starting to forget. It’s been eight months after Donghyuck left for training and you were starting to forget everything.

You were starting to forget how his voice sounded on the phone at night, tired and hoarse after a long day but still managing to say sweet things subtly hidden under his teases and cheeky remarks. You were starting to forget how his lips felt on yours, on your cheeks, on your temples, at the top of you head… on your neck. You were starting to forget how his slim fingers fit in the spaces between yours and how his thumb rubs against the back of your hand out of habit. Horrible as it may sound, but it seemed as if you were starting to forget what it was like to love him.

It’s ironic, though. It seemed too soon considering how you were like the first few weeks. Even when he left, he was everywhere. The two of you didn’t break up, with the promise of seeing each other again, the promise of him coming back to you. But it still felt like that… maybe worse. He was gone but you could see him in every store you used to drag him to. You could hear him in every song, even the shitty ones with repetitive riffs and lyrics. He loves random dancing to those. Almost every night, he would appear in your dreams, either as flashbacks or as random scenes.

That is until it started to fade. Your mind that was once filled with Donghyuck has slowly been filled with a lot of something elses.

Things changed faster than you expected them to. You were still on the same job at the bookstore with Taeil who has been promoted to manager. But you went to college where you met a senior who also happened to be your upstairs neighbor. His name is Doyoung. You endorsed him to a job at the bookstore and now you’re colleagues. Both he and Taeil are the closest friends you have at the moment.

Your parents were now retired after securing your future. They sold the house, moved to a smaller place in Busan, and started a barbecue business there.  You found a nice starter apartment and started drafting your book once again, but getting nowhere.

And in all those changes, the one person who you’ve always imagined would walk every step of the way with you weren't there.

“I’ll be back before you know it,” he said that day. You never understood that statement. It didn’t really make sense no matter how much you thought about it, but it’s the one thing that repetitively plays on your mind. For some reason, it always gave you hope and a weird longing for tomorrow. But as days passed, you realized it really wasn’t enough.

Three months after Hyuck left and the dreams became lesser. You have already opened nine out of twelve of his letters, most of it was because you just wanted to experience his thoughts again. You miss him, but the new environment made it easier to get him off your mind every once in a while.

Six months, the dreams were rare. You missed him more than ever. There was one night when you were alone in your apartment, feeling shitty because you’re not making any progress on a report that was due the next day. You knew if he was there, he’d motivate you to work harder. You knew if he was there, it would all be different. But he wasn’t. So you opened the last letter.

“Read… when you’re mad or upset that I’m not there,” you read out loud. “As if this is going to change anything.”

It didn’t. He still wasn’t there. You drafted a reply, just wanting to let it out of your system. After reading what you wrote, you hated yourself for it. You crumpled the paper and threw it in your drawer, not having the heart to toss it into the garbage itself.

And by the eighth month… the dreams were reduced to none. You almost didn’t notice it, until one night your neighbor was watching the TV too loud. You knew it was his voice that was singing even through the thin walls. You’d recognize it anywhere. You realized you haven’t thought about your boyfriend much lately. It has gotten to the point where you begin to wonder whether it is still right to call him your boyfriend anymore.

You cried that night, feeling guilty. The aching in your chest forced you to open that letter again, the one you’ve read the most: read… when you miss me.

Your eyes scanned the words but you’ve already memorized it by heart.

“I’ll be back before you know it,” you read, muttering to yourself, and before you could stop your tongue, you said, “Bullshit.”

You scribbled on a notepad on your desk: It’s been 8 months since the last time… I’m getting tired. Are we still… us?

Seeing as you thought you’ve forgotten, you were surprised to dream about him again for the first time in a while. It was about the day he told you he was leaving. You still remember the barrage of emotions you felt right then. Those same emotions mirrored themselves in your chest that night, leading to tearstained pillow cases.

“Just… don’t forget about me while you’re there.” You choked down a sob. “Promise me.”

“I promise. I’ll be back before you know it.”

You tossed and turned in your sheets. Bzzt, bzzt, bzzt!

You groaned, your hands desperately looking for your phone somewhere on your bed to turn off the goddamn alarm.

You sighed to yourself, frowning at the sensation of the wet pillow on your cheek. “Fuck my life. It’s too early to be sad.”

You forced your eyes open to check for any notifs on your phone. It was just a bunch of emails from your professors and a few texts from your mom. But at the bottom of the list, received at 2:01 AM today… followed by 9 other tabs.

You blinked and then pinched yourself, trying to see if you were still dreaming. But you weren’t. It’s really there. With a deep breath and a fluttering heart, you tapped on the notification, watching it expand.

hyuckie: y/n!!!

hyuckie: i cant believe im saying this but..

hyuckie: i hope your habits are as bad as i remember :(

hyuckie: please be awake?

hyuckie: i really wanna talk to you, i miss you so much!!  ㅠㅠㅠㅠ

hyuckie: but i guess you’re asleep now

hyuckie: which is good!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hyuckie: so i’ll talk to you in the morning?

hyuckie: goodnight :>>

You sat up, reading and re-reading the texts. It didn’t seem real. Was it...? Is this some kind of joke fate was playing on you? After almost a month of barely thinking about him, Donghyuck once again let his existence known.

You gulped, the guilt almost eating you inside as your fingers found their way to your keypad.

You: hyuck…?

You: is this real???? are you back??

You waited five minutes. There was no reply. The small hope that bubbled in your chest when you saw his texts dissipated almost immediately. Maybe you just didn’t want to be fooled that easily or maybe you were getting tired of holding onto something that hasn’t really been sitting fully within your reach for so long.

Still, throughout the day, you checked your phone more than you usually do. Even while crossing the pedestrian. Even when you were in a lecture. Even while walking in the hallway. Even when you were manning the cashier at work. You checked your phone too much that it annoyed those who were watching.

“Y/N, stop it. You’re being stupid,” Doyoung said after he returned from a round of stacking books. He has a habit of saying things straight to people’s faces. Usually, it’s a good thing, but it’s also very annoying.

You looked up, consciously putting your phone back in your pocket with a sigh.

“He’s still probably busy. I’m sure he just had, like, a night off and decided to text you.” He shrugged. “His agency don’t really give their artists breaks that much, especially since he just debuted.”

Doyoung sometimes works in the same agency as Hyuck. He’s always getting hired by people here and there to sing demos or background vocals. Even when you’ve only really heard him sing under his breath, it’s not hard for you to say he’s talented. Also, he gives you scoop on what’s happening inside Hyuck’s agency. They’ve met a lot. But as a favor, you made Doyoung promise not to tell Hyuck that you know each other.

Maybe it sounds wrong, but you weren’t really spying on your boyfriend. Besides, Doyoung is almost useless when it comes to updating you about Hyuck. All he ever tells you are his schedules, but that’s not what you wanted to know. Whenever you talk about him, it always goes something like

“How’s he doing?”

“He seemed okay.”

“Does he talk about me sometimes?”

“No, but we didn’t really talk much. He and his friends scare me.”

You ran a hand through your hair in frustration. Your mind was a mess. You don’t know what to feel about Hyuck finally reaching out to you, and for some reason, you wanted to explain what made him do it even if the explanation sounded ridiculous.

“He decided to text me at 2 in the morning, after eight months of nothing,” you said, glaring at him. “It doesn’t make sense. Somebody probably just played a prank on him.”

“By texting you?” Doyoung snorted.

You shrugged. “Why not?”

“That’s what won’t make sense,” he muttered.

“Nothing makes sense.” You sighed.

“And yet you check your phone every two minutes just in case he replied.” He shook his head. “Again, you’re being stupid.”

You were just thinking of a retort when a customer came up to the counter and asked if you had anything available on astrology. Doyoung only smiled at her politely but offered no answer.

“Yes, ma’am. You’ll find them on the last aisle.” You smiled at the lady. When she was gone, you turned back to your friend who was busy scanning some magazine he picked up. “I’m not being stupid.”

Doyoung snorted. “First of all, lame comeback. Second, yes, you are. You’re going back and forth between ‘oh I miss my boyfriend’ and ‘I don’t even know if I care anymore.’ And you’ve been going at it for months, Y/N! Make up your mind. You have to realize this whole situation is unfair to you. Third, you worry too much. Has he even seen your text yet?”

You frowned. You hate it when Doyoung is right, which is most of the time. It’s unfair that he’s always the one who makes sense. It’s worse because he tells you things you don’t want to hear but definitely should. You almost wish Taeil was here. Doyoung seems to be more reserved around him, though you’re not really sure why.

“He hasn’t,” you replied weakly. “But just to be sure…” You whipped your phone out again.

Doyoung groaned loudly, throwing his hands in the air in frustration. “And here we have an idiot,” he grumbled. “God, Y/N. Give yourself a break.”

You just rolled your eyes, continuing to navigate your phone until you’ve reached your message thread with Hyuck. Your eyes almost popped out of their sockets.

Read 8:41 PM

“He’s seen it,” you muttered, mostly to yourself. But Doyoung heard it, too. Even he couldn’t hide his surprise.

“He has?” He leaned over to look. “Why isn’t he replying then? It’s been a minute.”

“Baby steps. Doyoungie,” you said kindly.

“Oh, so now you're back to being a hopeless romantic?” He sighed. “God, you’re gonna’ give me whiplash. Whatever. Just tidy up the counter. We have to close soon.”

You nodded.

Doyoung went to walk around the store again leaving you alone by yourself. You left your phone unlocked, the screen still displaying Hyuck’s messages as you moved around and did your routine of fixing the counter and the displays in front of it.

You’ve arranged everything and checked the store’s valuables twice, yet there were still no changes on your phone except your battery has gone down 2%.

“He really left me on read,” you muttered to yourself. “Unbelievable.”

With a sigh, you locked your phone, giving up. Maybe Doyoung was right (again). Hyuck probably just finally had a night to himself and decided to talk to you, but you couldn’t reply. Fuck timing. It always ruins everything.

The lady from earlier came to you once again to purchase an astrology book. She smiled and said thanks after you handed the book back in a paper bag. You returned her smile, but inside you were questioning why people even believe in stars. You shrugged. Who am I to talk though? Why do I even believe in a relationship that doesn’t feel like one anymore? you thought to yourself.

As if the universe was determined to prove you wrong, your phone started ringing, vibrating against the wooden surface of the counter. When your eyes landed on the caller ID, you felt your heart drop to your stomach.

“hyuckie”

It took you a moment to react. Before you started dating, Donghyuck changed the setting of his ringtone on your phone to Stay With Me by Chanyeol & Punch. He did it as a joke to tease you, but after getting used to it, you didn’t bother to change it. You regret that decision now. The song played as if you were in some sort of romantic drama, awaiting for the male lead. It seems ridiculous to imagine, but it was enough to build the tension.

You answered the call before the vocals came in.

“...hello?” you said, your voice smaller than usual.

“Y/N?” Hyuck’s voice came through the speakers. You felt your heart clench just by the sound of it. “Hi.”

“Hyuck?” you asked, feeling stupid right after. There was no doubt it was him. But it felt surreal that he’s calling you right now that you just had to make sure.

“Who else, silly?” He laughed. “How’s my baby?”

Your face scrunched as you suppressed a scream. Why am I being like this? It’s just Hyuck, you thought to yourself, trying to calm down. But it’s Hyuck!!! You wanted to cry but you were still in public. A customer might come in at the last minute and see you bawling your eyes out. Even the thought of it makes you want to punch yourself.

“Wait, is it really you?!” You could barely hide the emotions in your voice. It was too much, a heavy mixture of excitement and nostalgia and happiness and for a reason… also sadness.

“Yes, idiot. Where are you?” He sounded a bit breathless. His voice mixed with the faint sound of traffic in the background. He was out, alright, but is he on a break? How long is this phone call going to last?

You looked around, suddenly confused, mind hazy. “I’m… where am I… um, I’m at work. Why? Where are you?”

“You’re still at work? But it’s 9,” he said.

“Yeah, we’re closing soon. Where are you? Are you on a break? Why are you calling now?” You wanted to ask so many questions but they’re all getting jammed in your mind at the moment. It doesn’t even matter since Hyuck isn’t answering any of them.

“Close it now,” he said.

“What?”

“Close the store now.”

“Why? My friend is still arranging the shelves.” You looked around for Doyoung.

“Tell your friend you have to go home,” he said before letting out a breath.

“What? But the keys are with me. Taeil would be mad if it gets lost,” you reasoned. “What are you even��”

“Just tell your friend something important came up.”

“There’s literally nothing going on in my life right now. What important thing would ‘come up?’” You snorted. “Just—”

You heard the bell hanging above the door ring, making you jump on your feet. “Shit. I have to go. We have a customer. I’ll call you, please pick up later. Imissyou,Iloveyou,byebye,” you said as fast as you could, crouching down lower with every word, hoping to hide from the eyes of whoever just came in.

You ended the call, putting the phone back in your pocket, before standing up straight, ready to greet the guest.

“Hi, how may I help…”

“Hi.” The guy smiled, chest heaving slightly, trying to catch his breath.

He was wearing a black jacket over a plain white shirt that was tucked in his jeans. The look was so simple, yet he still looked amazing. Better than your remember. Better than he appears on TV. Something about him was different, you could feel it. He looked different. He was taller and his cheeks were somehow smaller than you remembered. His hair was a different shade of brown than when you last saw. He was still slightly slouched but something about his stance is more powerful. He held himself with more pride now. And rightfully so. But underneath all of those, you could still feel it. That familiarity. That sense of security that no matter how many things have changed, he still is the same Lee Donghyuck. And somehow, despite your doubts and overthinking, you just knew he still is your Lee Donghyuck.

“Hyuck,” you said, voice faltering. You didn’t think it was this easy to have tears pooling in your eyes, but it was. Fuck, you thought. “Hi.”

He let out a chuckle upon seeing your reaction. “To answer your question, I’m your important thing that came up.”

[thatlonelygirl630]

If your still up for taking some prompts? I remember seeing a post about a groundhogs head cannon where if kara dies she relives that same day? Can you include how she discovers it? Kara x reader?

     A/N: Hello Anon! I do remember seeing a post about that some time ago but cant find it. If anyone could link it to me ill gladly put it in. I think its pretty gender neutral but again I write with fem!reader in mind unless told other wise. I wouldn’t call this fluffy but there is a sprinkle of angst.

Trigger warning: Death, Swearing?

       You and Kara Danvers grew up together in Midvale. Well maybe that was a stretch, you went to the same school and lived a street over. You weren’t the type of friends to hang out at each other’s house or go out to the mall, more like friends who you could talk to in a class full of strangers. Kara was always a bit closed off and unsure of herself in high school but she never had problems helping you with your calculus homework and you helping her in History.

     The two of you didn’t even mean to go to college together thus neither of you knew you would be thrust into the same intro to English lecture until the professor took attendance for the first and only time. After that year though Kara had told you about the horror story that was her roommate and you had to laugh at seeing the usually positive ‘give everyone a chance’ Kara complaining about someone for essentially living too loudly.

     So, at the start of the next semester, you both roomed together and some time into your senior year, you started dating. It was like any cheesy romance novel where the two of you went on one too many failed dates before finally realizing you were two blind roommates in love. At graduation you found out she was Kryptonian, it wasn’t like you knew all along or anything but your brain finally put the puzzle pieces together.

     Kara hadn’t told you, no, Kara had just gotten off the phone with her cousin who was exclaiming how proud he was of her all while she played with the silly Superman keychain you had gotten her. It was an odd realization but everything just made more sense. All the times she had played with it before was when the two of you would be watching the news showing Superman fighting with an alien. You always shrugged it off as her not wanting to see someone she clearly views as an idol get ruffed up but to see her do the same with her cousin? Maybe you had always had a sneaking suspicion she wasn’t completely human but now you knew how deep that went.

     Form that day forwards you vowed to wait until she felt comfortable opening herself up like that. Surely just her being here on earth came with a horror story of why she left her home in the first place, a trauma that might still be too fresh even after years.

     To celebrate Kara upgrading her waitressing job at Noonan’s to Cat Grant’s assistant everyone came over to Alex’s apartment. In honor of the celebration, Alex turned over the lease handing her little sister the paperwork making it all set in stone. Kara bounced around in joy naming off all the things she would change and where she would put her stuff. It was an adorable ramble and she was so excited she lifted you up running around a few times. It was something she always did and you thought nothing of it but that’s when you noticed Alex staring at you.

“Do you know?” She had asked you one night after Kara left to go get the food.

“Know what?” You frowned at the completely out of the blue question.

“About Kara.”

“Alex you’re going to have to get more specific here, I’m not a mind reader.” You laughed picking at the bowl of chips.

“Look at me.” You look up and meet her serious expression “Do you know about Kara.” She stated more than asked.

     You resisted the urge to audibly gulp and fidget in place “I really don’t know what you’re talking about.” You said carefully and you could see the way Alex’s eyes widened slightly the way she nodded and leaned back.

“Good answer.” The apartment was left in silence until Kara arrived all smiles and happy rambling.

      It was that conversation that landed you near kidnaped and taken to some kind of interrogation room. A few of what you think are agents, or maybe henchmen, in all-black tactical gear guard the door for what seems like hours until it opens.

“What the hell Alex!” Is the first thing you get out “This is messed up on so many levels.”

“Sorry” Alex smiled gently tilting her chin and you see the man who entered in behind her.

      In the end, he offered you a job, as it turned out Alex didn’t work for the FBI but for the Department of Extra-Normal Operations, DEO. Hank Henshaw wanted you for your computer engineering degree and Alex wanted you to help protect Kara. With the prospect of protecting your girlfriend, you agreed instantly.

     It was hard the lying but after you’re not only physical but mental training it was easier. The DEO taught you methods to pass a polygraph whilst lying straight through your teeth among many other skills. Kara commented on the extra muscle but certainly didn’t complain when you told her you had taken to working out. As far as she knew you had a desk job at the FBI just like Alex.

     On the day Kara agreed to go out to the bar with one of the interns at CatCo Alex was flying out to Geneva to get intel on a case as you flew to Boston your flights were only hours apart. You had been texting Kara periodically as she slowly started to realize the man meant the bar hang out as a date. She used angry emojis when she pieced together the puzzle because you didn’t tell her and “Why did you let me go!”

     You saw it immediately on the small crappy airport TVs displaying the news. Alex’s plane blew an engine right above the city. You watched for a moment in shock. A lot went through your head, finding out if this was some kind of attack, was Alex a target? The plane seemed to be headed for a nosedive in the harbor. Not the best odds but given Alex’s training in underwater situations, you’re sure she could make it out.

     Just as you were about to call Hank the plane leveled out engine still burning and even started to turn in order not to crash into the bridge. Definitely some kind of external intervention going on. By that point, news helicopters got close-ups of the plane settling into the harbor. Just on the plane’s wing, you saw it, well her. You saw Kara.

   It was hard to tell at first. The picture was grainy and at a bad angle. Her being covered in soot and soaking wet didn’t help but as creepy as it may sound that was Kara’s body. That was the way her hair gets when she has just stepped out of the pool or a shower. You had seen it plenty of times. Also, you had just bought her that same sweater just a few weeks ago when she spilled soy sauce all over her other one.

     Abandoning the airport, you got a cab back to Kara’s apartment and nearly ran into Alex at the door “Go back to the DEO.” she whispered “Hank he’s- “

      Before Alex could continue a thump was heard inside. You didn’t need Alex to finish her sentence so you nodded and walked away. This was serious, Kara was always aloud to skate by off the books because she didn’t use her powers or tell anyone her secret. Now that it’s out there, Hank might want to bring her in. It was only after days of arguing between Alex and Hank could reach an agreement. Alex swore Kara wouldn’t expose herself further but blend back into the woodwork like a normal human so Hank agreed to let it slide.

      You were just lucky you didn’t get in on that argument because days later a woman in red and blue started parading around the city in a homemade costume slowly getting more and more professional looking each save. It wasn’t until the finished form of the suit had made its debut did Hank send orders to capture ‘Supergirl’.

      At the time of the capture, you were stuck on a flight home from the delayed mission in Boston and Geneva. When you landed and saw the news you were devastated at how Alex allowed them to do it. Orders or not Kara is family.

“What the hell?” You ask walking in the main room seeing Hank look unpleased at another argument “You used Kryptonite on her? That was unnecessary she wasn’t a threat she was helping people!”

“Supergirl needed to be taught a lesson.” Hank said lowly “It’s standard protocol for aliens who blatantly show their powers on such a platform you know this.” You worked your jaw “if I had let this slide” he whispered lowly “everyone would know who she is.” He looked around to prove his point.

“You didn’t have to use Kryptonite.” You shook your head sighing as you see Supergirl with a look of betrayal firmly planted on her face as she watches from the doorway.

     She didn’t speak for a long moment and you couldn’t hold eye contact “You were in on this too?” You nod taking a deep breath as something between a sigh and a sob left her throat before she clumsily made off in a blur clearly trying to find the way out but not willing to ask.

     Alex came up next to you a minute later letting out a quick breath “Did you see her face?” you mumble still staring at the door she had left out of.

“Yea” Alex nearly whispered accompanied by a sigh in defeat “I’ll go try and talk to her.”

“I’ll follow you, best get the fighting done in one go.” You grabbed your bag that had been dumped on the floor, jet leg all but forgotten as tears stung your eyes.

   Alex beat you there and just nearing her apartment you could hear the screaming match, you sat in the hall listening to Alex give her side then Kara. You mentally prepped yourself for going in next and had almost convinced yourself to just leave when the door opened and Alex stormed out. Kara was all but slamming the door closed when she caught sight of you.

“Were you even on a business trip or was that a lie too.” She asked crossing her arms.

“Would you like to see the plane tickets?” You shuffle through the bag and pull the papers out. Kara hesitantly takes them and gives them a quick once over before looking up at you “Wanna explain why it’s not your name?”

“Cause it’s a cover.” You nearly whisper out grabbing the wallet as well toss it up to her.

     She scoffs looking through it seeing the fake IDs and credit cards “I can’t believe this.” She dropped it on your lap before walking further into the apartment but left the door open. You took the invitation and stood up walking through it keeping your bag by the door.

“How long have you known about me? Did they tell you or- “?

“No Kara I- “You hesitate “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“How long have you known?” She insists.

“Known what?” You try.

“Known I’m an alien” She whispers lowly as if she doesn’t want it announced to the neighbors.

     You pause a second too long “You’re an alien?”

     Kara scoffs “Stop lying!” she rolls her eyes turning away.

“I’m sorry Kar- “.

“Just” she sighs interrupting you “Just please go, I’m really tired.” She muttered out dejectedly.

     Your mouth opens and closes severe times to protest but nothing comes out. Instead, you scoop up your bag and make to leave “For the record, I figured it out myself when we graduated college. I was just waiting for you to feel comfortable enough to tell me.”

     Kara turned slightly to look at you and you could see the mixed emotions swirling in her eyes. For a moment you think she is going to protest you leaving or say anything but after a moment of silence from her, you leave softly shutting the door behind yourself.

     The two of you do not speak for 2 weeks and you are pushing a 3rd when you get a knock on your door. Quickly you get up and go to fetch the food you had ordered but opening the door makes you freeze.

“Did you get a second job?” You try and tease as Kara holds the bags to your favorite takeout place and from the looks of it it’s what you ordered.

“No, I was on my way up when I saw the guy. It’s your favorite place so I just had a lucky guess. Figured I owed you dinner anyway.” She smiled holding out the food to you “I miss you.”

     You take the food bag that is the metaphorical olive branch while also letting her inside “I missed you too.”

     Together, in the following weeks, you try some of that healthy relationship communication and eventually work everything out. Secretly you support Kara in her embracing Supergirl because of the light it puts in her eye. It’s also you who convinces her to join the DEO for her own protection even though you think she half does it for yours’ and Alex’s protection as well.

     Everything was sorting itself out, Kara was over your apartment when you had been looking through the TV stations for something to watch “Groundhog’s day?” She frowned “What is that?”

“You’ve neve- Kara!” You gasped “It’s like a must-see the point is like a classic troupe now.”

     Kara shrugged and you instantly clicked in it watching the last few minutes of some crime show before the movie started. You watched the movie together and you noticed Kara was oddly silent during it, not asking her usual questions or small comments. You took that as her being invested and got up to refill your drinks and grab more snacks.

     By the time the movie ended and the credits filled the screen you looked over at Kara whose entire face was frozen “So what did you think?” At the sound of your voice, she snapped her head to the side staring at you in awe.

“It-it all makes sense now.” She swallows thickly “oh Rao.”

     She tells you all about her first few days on earth, how before any of her powers developed, she had wandered out in the dark to look out at the stars. A drunk driver had hit her and she woke up to repeat the same day. Then another time shortly after where she had been messing around in Jeremiah’s garage lab only to accidentally spill a vile on herself that made her skin glow green. Now she can place it as Kryptonite, but again she woke up repeating the same day over again.

     Immediately you took her to the DEO so you and Alex could run some tests while Kara called her cousin to see if he had experienced anything similar. He hadn’t.

     After a few months and a vile of Superman’s blood later you noticed that his solar cells and Kara’s were slightly different. It was Alex who figured out it was because Clark developed with his cells solar powered while Kara hadn’t. “It altered your DNA in a way Clark’s hasn’t” Alex had explained to her sister “it has to be the reason.” Of course, none of you wanted to test it, the thought of possibly killing Kara was too horrific for either of yours’ or Alex’s inner scientist.

     However, as Supergirl grew more and more popular she attracted more enemies and the more enemies she attracted the more dangerous they became. You found sometimes, after days of tirelessly tracking down the villain of the year, Kara would come into the DEO with a haunted look in her eye. Sometimes she would burst into your apartment at precisely 6am hugging you tightly breaking down in sobs.

     Each time she rejected your efforts to talk about it and each time you gently prodded until she confided that she had died “It’s like, I breathe out and my eyes close.” She closed her eyes letting a few tears fall “And then I wake up in bed all alone.” She eventually admitted to you after a year with the newly discovered power.

     You had moved in the next day because “I never want you to be alone when you wake up.”

      Honestly, you and Kara living together was long overdue, you had never pushed for the same reason she hadn’t. The secrets. The secrets that were now out in the open between you two.

     Kara got really good at hiding it but claimed they were becoming less frequent as her training got better. You believed her and she had stopped waking up every few weeks in tears. You’re sure even if she was good at hiding it, she would still wake with a start.

      When Reign showed up everyone was hyper-aware trying to track her down. You, however, were focused solely on Kara. How bright are her eyes were that morning? Did she have a small bounce in her step? How straight is her posture? Was there a smile on her face? All things that would point to a death day. It didn’t happen until you could feel yourself on the tip of a breakthrough.

     By accident, you had pulled an all-nighter and the rays of the sun were peeking through the windows when a hand grabbed your wrist making you jump. You took in the blue sleeve and looked up seeing a serious Supergirl starring back at you.

    She looks like she is about to deliver the worst news of your life but instead, she smiles softly “You’ve been at it all night, come on let’s go home.”

“Okay just give me one second and- “

“That silly code will be there later” She tabled out of it before you could type another letter “come on baby, let me take you home.”

     Slowly you nod as she picks you up flying you home and tucks you into bed crawling in beside you. The sun is high in the sky when you wake again as Kara asks how your night went. You go into a rant about how Alex and you played around in a lab for the first time in what felt like years and you ended up starting a fire but extinguished it before alarms could go off.

     When you looked over Kara was just staring at you with a soft smile, her face was almost knowingly…. knowingly?! “Kara” You whisper receiving a nod in return “How many times have I told you about the fire in the lab?”

     She smiles impossibly softer now “A few.”

“How many is a few?”

     Kara pauses usually it only takes her 2 maybe 3 attempts to get her day right in the best outcome possible neither of you could tell how many attempts she would get or if there was a limit, you feared she would be stuck in an infinite loop forever reliving her last day “32” she whispers softly.

“32?” You gasp out sitting up “Kara” You reach out placing a hand on her arm “tell me how I can help? How does it happen?”

     A laugh cuts you off “Don’t you think you’ve tried everything already?” She sits up as well “This is just- how it ends for me I guess.” Kara shrugs like it was nothing and not her death.

“No” You shake your head “please tell me how?”

“It won’t work.” Kara shakes her head smiling as if she had already accepted it “I only have another hour alone with you” she smiles stroking your face “Just let me have it?” She leans frowns placing a gentle kiss to your lips.

    After Kara refuses to tell you how she dies, again and again, you decide to try and live this day making every decision the opposite of what you would normally do. To get in the habit you took a different route to the DEO, did your coding at a different computer, used the other floor’s bathroom, and hell even ordered a salad in the cafeteria.

     Brainy was the one who tracked Pestilence and then got a location, so Supergirl and all the other Superheroes flew out to go after her while Alex and Winn stayed back still poisoned. You grabbed your belt ready to chase after them before freezing “Opposite…” You whisper slowly sitting back down in your chair feeling the anxiety running through your veins. You nearly stood back up three times seeing Kara go down but sagged back in relief when Imra got what you needed to make the cure.

     When you administered it to Kara, she blinked back her haze and looked at you “You are alive?”

“Yes,” you nod your head.

“I-every time you show up trying to save me Pestilence kills you.” She paused “Then some way or another I get killed, usually trying to save you.”

“I figured I had to do something I would never usually do.” you smile and Kara breathes out in relief wrapping you in a hug.

     After a long moment, Kara pulls back tears spilling from her eyes “I can’t wait to wake up next to you.” She smiles and from then on you vow to always make it home at night lest you break your next promise.

“I’ll always be there when you wake up.” Surely the ring in your DEO locker would be proof enough of that.

[ismael37olson]

Jon ALi Interview: Erik Hassle Leaves Sweden Behind On ‘Innocence Lost’ – Out Now!

It’s been a little over seven years since Erik Hassle – perhaps better known around these parts as my Swedish Ginger Bae – first stole my heart with his stunning and underappreciated 2009 debut Hassle, which was later released as Pieces in U.S in 2010. In the years since, Erik has smartly and carefully curated a space for himself in the pop music arena.

As a songwriter, Erik‘s had a hand in crafting some superb pop releases over the past few years, including Shakira and Rihanna‘s “Can’t Remember To Forget You,” Icona Pop‘s “Emergency,” and most recently, “Cruel” by Snakehips and Zayn Malik – and he’s still writing for others (more on that later).

As a singer in his own right, he’s supplied us with a number of high quality Swede-esque, soul-pop solo tracks: From the glorious stuff of his debut Pieces – “Hurtful” and “Don’t Bring Flowers” – to We Dance standout “Stay” to 2014’s Somebody’s Party EP, the prequel to his latest full-length album Innocence Lost, available everywhere today (January 27).

The 12-track collection – including the previously released “No Words” and “If Your Man Only Knew,” Somebody”s Party EP cuts “Pathetic,” “Talk About It” (feat. Vic Mensa) and “Innocence Lost (feat. Tinashe),” as well as his Gorgon City cut from their debut Sirens, “FTPA” – is a impressively sophisticated set of intimate and emotional, moody (and sometimes devastating) pop gems, brimming with smooth-sailing grooves of thumping electro-R&B.

Below, Erik opens up to us about the meaning of Innocence Lost, the recording process, songwriting, and plans for the rest of 2017.

Jon ALi: Why give the album the title Innocence Lost? What does it mean to you?

Erik Hassle: The title is called ‘Innocence Lost‘ because the title felt like it represented the whole album in the best way. The songs on the album are stories of my encounter with Los Angeles when I first decided to move there and leave Sweden behind four years ago.

Jon ALi: There is a lot going on lyrically in this group of songs. Were the feelings on this project in hindsight or were they feelings that you went through over a long period of time?

Erik Hassle: When I started working on these songs, I did it together with a Swedish songwriter, artist and producer named Daniel Ledinsky who became one of my best friends. We were gonna work for a couple of days when I had just come to L.A. and decided to not put any thought in what we were writing about. Instead we just decided to write unconditionally. It was later, after a couple of weeks, that I realized that I had been writing about my own life and my own feelings. After that, I realized that I was gonna sing the songs myself. In the process though, I was not thinking about that at all — so there really wasn’t any plan before we started writing.

Jon ALi: How was the recording process and who else did you work with this time around?

Erik Hassle: I wrote most of the songs with Daniel. When we were new to the city we got in a room with a couple of amazing producers, so it’s like different producers on almost every song. Some of them were Dave Sitek, John Hill, Al Chucks, SOHN and Swedish producers Sikow and also Grizzly. It was a pretty mashed up recording process. It was my first time in the city and I tried to meet new people, so the album kinda turned out like a debut album in a way because it’s from different adventures from a new city.

Jon ALi: What was the best part about making this album for you?

Erik Hassle: I went to L.A. with my crew from Sweden that I had been working with for years already. The best part of everything was to build a new kind of home and place in L.A. together with my friends and all the amazing people I got to meet during this process.

Jon ALi: Were there any songs you recorded that made you think, “I can’t release this” or “I can’t believe I’m releasing this”?

Erik Hassle: I didn’t really ever have a song that I wrote that I thought ‘oh my god, I cant believe that I am releasing this!’. But there have been a couple of songs that I’ve been a part of writing that have been unreal. One of the first one that I wrote that got picked up by another artist was a duet with Rihanna and Shakira, called “Can’t Remember To Forget You“. Daniel and I wrote the song at the same time as we wrote my new album and that was huge, I mean unreal. But we wrote a song called “Happy Idiot” that turned up as the first single for TV On The Radio‘s previous album and that was… yeah, I cant believe that til this day still.

Jon ALi: What unreleased song from Innocence Lost are you most excited for people to hear?

Erik Hassle: “Silver & Gold” because it’s my favorite. “No Words” has already been released but it’s also one of my favorites.

Jon ALi: You collaborate more so than ever on this project? Tinashe, Vic Mensa and Gorgon City. How was it collaborating with them and is there anyone else you would’ve liked to have had on the album that didn’t make the cut?

Erik Hassle: I actually haven’t thought about anyone that I would have liked to collaborate with that didn’t make it on the new album. But I am really happy about the collaborations that are on there, they came along kind of differently. Tinashe and I are signed to the same record label, RCA, and we were both up-and-coming at the same time. We took a day in the studio to sing on eachother’s stuff basically and “Innocence Lost” was a song I had thought about being a duet. She liked it and made the song better than it was before and did it amazingly. Vic Mensa wasn’t through me, that collaboration happened while I was releasing my EP. My label was looking for different types of features and remixes to release together with a song. I’m still so grateful that Vic wanted to do a verse on “Talk About It“. We didn’t meet until afterwards, but “Talk About It” wouldn’t be the same without that verse. There is so much more to tell in the story than just what the song was before Vic Mensa featured on it. He really fulfilled the song in a way and took it to the next level.

Jon ALi: You’ve written a lot of songs, presumably, that were meant for you and ended up going to other people. Are there any songs you wished you kept for yourself? Are you still writing for others?

Erik Hassle: I don’t really have any songs that I wish that I kept for myself, but I can say that at the time “Can’t Remember To Forget You” was about to be released, I thought about doing the song myself.

Jon ALi: Are you still writing for others?

Erik Hassle: Yes, I am still writing for others and I’m trying to stay busy and write as much as possible. It’s a good break from your own world to get out of your head and just write for others. It’s actually something I really appreciate – to help somebody or be a part of creating a vision together with somebody else and collaborate. So it’s fun, really fun to write for other people.

Jon ALi: Do you want to still be doing this in five years? Do you have different ambitions?

Erik Hassle: I don’t know, I think so. But five years from now, I might develop into another genre of what I’m doing as far as being a writer/artist. Maybe sign other artists or something. But I feel like I wanna keep being a music person because I have been doing this my whole life, and I have so many relationships in this choice of a career. It feels like I’m a part of something and I wouldn’t wanna change that.

Jon ALi: What are you most looking forward to in the next year?

Erik Hassle: Unfortunately, there have been so many bad things happening in the world so you gotta stay really positive in these times and maybe spend your time getting excited about less important stuff. Like football for example in the next year, which is something I am very fond of. So what I’m looking forward to is that; maybe Manchester United could be in the Premier League next year. That would be a good thing. Maybe I wanna get a dog too, something to look forward to. And then finally, after a long time waiting to release this album, it’s a super nice feeling to have it out.

Jon ALi: Do you plan to tour with this album?

Erik Hassle: I haven’t got any tours or shows planned at the moment actually since I’m currently back in Sweden, but we’ll see what happens. I would love to tour.

Jon ALi: Will we be getting any more visuals from you for this album?

Erik Hassle: I am actually putting together a video as we speak for a single that I put out recently called “Missing You” that’s on the new album, so there will be a video for that one. And probably more visuals for forthcoming songs from the album. Hope you like them!

Erik Hassle’s new album Innocence Lost is available on Spotify and Apple Music now!

from Jon ALi's Blog http://jonalisblog.com/2017/01/27/jon-ali-interview-erik-hassle-leaves-sweden-behind-on-innocence-lost-out-now/