#i cant say what the funniest moment will be. could be this afternoon could be next week. but i will know it when it happens

[cliveguy]

hrello mr C guy. please redacted reveal soon it would make my summer. even the most anticlimactic expose would sustain me for at least a week

i PROMMY redacted reveal this summer. i'm just biding my time waiting for the funniest time to do it. but it will definitely be this summer and probably sooner rather than later.

[littlelovelymemes]

✰  —  —  —  EVEN MORE POPULAR TEXT POSTS STARTERS

‘  let me just make one thing clear... i have no clue what’s going on, ever, at any moment, at any point in time. who knows what’s going on? not me. not ever.  ’ ‘  i would just like to publicly announce that i have no idea what i am doing  ’ ‘  we came from the same star and we will come together again in the end  ’ ‘  i have a ‘why am i like this’ moment at least five times a day  ’ ‘  did i need it? no. did i buy it? yes.  ’ ‘  the most dangerous game is resting your eyes after you turned off the alarm clock in the morning  ’ ‘  petition for stars in the day time please???  ’ ‘  i love it when i wake up and stretch and something cracks. makes me feel like a glo-stick  ’ ‘  drop whatever you’re doing right now and climb a tree  ’ ‘  the most fucked up part of adult life is how you can just decide to do things  ’ ‘  i’m a person who wants to do lots of things trapped inside a body that wants to SLEEP at all times  ’ ‘  i’m so tired but i’ll probably be awake until 3 am for no reason  ’ ‘  time to kick my own ass. bitch had it coming for too long  ’ ‘  honestly ‘thanks i hate it’ is one of the funniest phrases in the english language  ’ ‘  do you ever wonder how many people have loved you and never told you?  ’ ‘  the internets one true talent is making me sick of things i’ve never seen or read or heard  ’ ‘  i’m permanently emotionally damaged but it’s chill, i’m chill  ’ ‘  all cracker barrels are dimensionally linked. you could walk into a cracker barrel in georgia and walk out of one in arkansas and feel nothing  ’ ‘  ‘you look different with makeup’????? you think i’m buying shit for hundreds of dollars to just keep looking like my ugly self ... ok  ’ ‘  why did the fray go off so hard in ‘how to save a life’?  ’ ‘  anyone else bummed they have 2 sleep alone tonight and uh not in some1s arms  ’ ‘  not to be too controversial but i like it when people are nice   ’ ‘  the sun has no business tapping out at the tender hour of 5pm bitch i have depression  ’ ‘  i forgot how fucking weird november is theres no afternoon its just night after 2pm  ’ ‘  what time do you need me? i am unavailable whenever that time is  ’ ‘  look i may have made a few typos and committed a few murders but nobody’s perfect okay  ’ ‘  i guess at this point i should just consider dating myself  ’ ‘  i’m aiming for the “she’s a badass and cute as hell but i wouldn’t touch her without asking” look  ’ ‘  haha if you’re bored you could kiss me idk just sayin  ’ ‘  i see you’re paying attention to someone who is not me. why is that.  ’ ‘  80s music wont solve all my life’s problems but it certainly distracts me from them  ’ ‘  i cant believe what walkie talkies are called  ’ ‘  some people think life is like a rollercoaster but my life is more like one of those rides that spin really fast so you’re pinned to the wall and can’t do anything about it  ’ ‘  hey girl do you want to make a fragile human connection in the vast and unfeeling infinity of a chaotic universe  ’ ‘  all these fuckboys but who is the fuckfather  ’ ‘  i love drunk me but i don’t trust her  ’ ‘  do you have those people that you’d go anywhere with unconditionally, like they could say “lets go check out that dumpster” and you’d be like “im in”  ’ ‘  nah sorry i cant go out tonight, i have plans to spiral into uncontrollable anxiety starting in the early evening and ending at roughly 3 am  ’ ‘  me: queen of having had enough  ’ ‘  she needs a hug (i’m she)  ’ ‘  is it acceptable to start an essay with “listen here you little shit”? 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kiss me on the lips dude  ’ ‘  too many songs about love. not enough songs about sword fights  ’ ‘  don’t talk to me or my 78 insecurities ever again  ’ ‘  i just did a tarot reading... it said ur a bitch  ’ ‘  a good substitute for love and fulfillment? a crunchwrap supreme from taco bell  ’ ‘  i fucked up? idk what you’re referring to but probably  ’ ‘  *in a high-pitched mocking voice* "are you okay?" what the fuck.  ’ ‘  how do u just..... not believe in aliens  ’ ‘  a coffee pot can be a coffee mug if you just don’t fucking care  ’ ‘  “you’re up early!” jokes on you i didn’t sleep at all and am in between energized and dying  ’ ‘  dont wanna sound like a slut but i really need a hug right now  ’ ‘  casual fan? no sorry i only know how to invest my whole livelihood into something and spend every waking moment thinking about said thing  ’ ‘  i have a dozen hearts swirling around my head irl like that isnt a filter its permanent  ’ ‘  i worry about you even when you say you’re fine  ’ ‘  i will never hurt you. i will always stick by your side. i will always try to make you smile  ’ ‘  true love: having to hold back your adorable, violent girlfriend to keep her from straight up murdering a dude  ’ ‘  cute date idea: be nice to me  ’ ‘  im so jealous of people who know what they want to do with their future i dont even know what t.v show to watch next  ’ ‘  me? clingy? yes please don’t leave me  ’ ‘  hey….,.,.. no offense but,,. i want someone to love and cherish me  ’ ‘  i need someone to lay in bed with me for hours  ’ ‘  dark hannah montana..... show me the worst of both worlds  ’ ‘  someone has to say it: come on eileen is a fucking banger like that shit snaps,, a bop for the century  ’ ‘  roses are red, i’m going to bed  ’ ‘  bless netflix for creating the skip intro button honestly  ’ ‘  they call me… 7 Knives. because that’s how many knives it takes me to cook things because i keep puttin em in the fuckin sink without thinking about it  ’ ‘  i wanna burry my face in someone’s chest right now til i fall asleep and wake up 4 hours later just to find i’m still in their arms  ’ ‘  the internet has ruined me honestly i’m numb to everything. it could be the end of the world and i’d be like “tag urself i’m the acid rain”  ’ ‘  lately i have been…….dying to be in love…,..and that’s the mood sadly  ’ ‘  not to be ns fw but i’d cry if someone kissed me on the cheek  ’ ‘  sexting? nah. i’m into spexting. spooky texting. ever seen a ghost? hmu.  ’ ‘  not to sound cocky as shit but i’m a fucking good person with a big heart and i deserve a lot more than the shitty hand life has dealt me this far  ’ ‘  i say i love you a lot because i do  ’ ‘  i’m sorry. i can’t come to the phone right now? why? oh. cause i hate talking on the phone please text me instead.  ’ ‘  low on self esteem, so u run on mac & cheese  ’ ‘  who’s gonna come lay with me in bed and let me wrap my legs and arms around u like a small bear  ’ ‘  youre a coward if youre not on the way to my house right now to give me a kiss  ’ ‘  my personality is like 90% the song i’m currently listening to  ’ ‘  the first step to any murder is to have fun and be yourself  ’ ‘  no offense @ life but can i have a breath.. a break... some slack...  ’ ‘  the best kind of alcohol is a lot  ’ ‘  911 i hate to be “that guy” but i glued myself to the ceiling again  ’ ‘  having “feelings” is ruining my reputation of being a heartless bitch  ’

[writingguide003-blog]

Ryder Cup 2018: Guardian writers select their standout moments

New Post has been published on https://writingguideto.com/must-see/ryder-cup-2018-guardian-writers-select-their-standout-moments/

Ryder Cup 2018: Guardian writers select their standout moments

Francesco Molinari was the standout performer while Justin Thomas, Tommy Fleetwood and Ian Poulter were among those who also had a tournament to remember

Player of the tournament

Francesco Molinari. Nobody comes close. The plaudit is all the more valid because Molinari will be bashful about accepting it. Ewan Murray

Francesco Molinari. Who else? I dont know what planet he lives on, said Thomas Bjrn, but its not the one that the rest of the players live on, thats for sure. Andy Bull

Francesco Molinari. Could there be anyone else after he became only the fourth player in Ryder Cup history to go 5/5? Afterwards his teammates joked that the Italian was so good he never saw the 18th hole only for a smiling Molinari to point out that hed played it once in practice. Sean Ingle

Francesco Molinari. As much as he would resist the suggestion, the Italian who has burdened himself with supporting West Ham United was more than compensated when he joined the pantheon of the elite by sweeping all five matches and being there for the final delivery of the sword, courtesy of Phil Mickelsons errant tee shot on the 16th. Kevin Mitchell

Francesco Molinari. But Webb Simpson deserves recognition, too; the Players champion always plotted his route wisely around a punitive course. Where else to complete his 2018 renaissance but Paris? Scott Murray

Rookie of the tournament

Tommy Fleetwood. On the course, Fleetwood was as impressive as ever (before running out of singles steam) while his general approach and demeanour was a breath of fresh air. The Ryder Cup was all the better for the Englishmans involvement. EM

Justin Thomas, who ended up carrying the US team. If a few of them had followed his lead the final result surely wouldnt have been so lopsided. AB

Justin Thomas. Tommy Fleetwood was brilliant too, but Thomas arguably had to do more of the heavy lifting, going 4/5 for an American team that was struggling and winning tight games against Ian Poulter and Jon Rahm on the Saturday morning with the help of his partner Jordan Spieth and Rory McIlroy in the singles. SI

Not Tommy Fleetwood, sadly, after his collapse in the singles left him with just the four wins with Francesco Molinari. Jon Rahm was a strong candidate, holding off the flickering challenge of Tiger Woods on Sunday. But Justin Thomass fourth point after a dog fight with Rory McIlroy left the most lasting impression of the new boys. KM

Tommy Fleetwood. For his record rookie haul, but also for his burgeoning bromance with Molinari. Europe loves a double-act: Seve and Ollie, Faldo and Monty, G-Mac and Wee Mac. Hooray for Moliwood! SM

Justin Thomas lines up a shot on the final day of the Ryder Cup, when he defeated Rory McIlroy in a tightly-fought singles match. On an individual level, the American had a good tournament. Photograph: Christian Petersen/Getty Images

Best celebration

Ian Poulter in the postbox outfit. He claims he will take it back to Florida and frame it. Poults frames everything, claimed Justin Rose. EM

Jon Rahm throwing his putter down, screaming and strutting around the 17th green after he closed out his singles match against Tiger Woods. AB

Ian Poulter isnt to everyones tastes but his prolonged and adrenalised chest-beating after defeating Dustin Johnson in the singles will live long in the memory. SI

Tommy Fleetwood has a symbiosis with the fans that is unforced and infectious. Even in defeat he was as ebullient as ever, the sign of a great team player, and embraced the fans with his trademark wide-legged squat. The man with the longest hair in golf also has the longest laugh. KM

Justin Thomas shushed and ear-cupped the crowd at 11 on Saturday afternoon, after which he almost seemed to be plotting a reverse takeover of Captain America Industries (CEO Patrick Reed). The gallery-baiting uniform suits him; he was indestructible after that. SM

Best match

Justin Rose/Jon Rahm v Tony Finau/Brooks Koepka. The first game of the event and the epitome of matchplay. Europe held an apparently decisive lead before Finau enjoyed an outrageous break on the 16th and Rose found water at the last. The US claimed the point. Breathtaking stuff. EM

Justin Thomass 1-up win over his great mate Rory McIlroy on Sunday, an 18-hole duel which twisted and turned one way then the other and back again. AB

A tough one to call but lets say Justin Thomas and Jordan Spieth against Ian Poulter and Jon Rahm given I followed it from inside the ropes. The match swung this way and that with seven birdies to Europe and 10 to the US team. SI

There were many to pick from, but for sheer tension and importance the lead singles on Sunday between Rory McIlroy and Justin Thomas was hard to beat. Both made mistakes, both fought for every point all the way to the end which was tragic for McIlroy when he plugged into a bunker on the 18th when all square. And Thomas was magnanimous in victory to cap off a fine, fighting win. KM

In a parallel universe, Alex Norn v Bryson DeChambeau decides everything. DeChambeau seals it for the US by wedging to 18 inches! No! Norn steals it for Europe with a 40-foot rake! Everyone piles on! Ah well, for a match that meant nothing in the real world it wasnt too bad as it was, given its wild denouement will come to visually define this victory. SM

Justin Rose and Jon Rahm congratulate each other during their fourballs match against Brooks Koepka and Tony Finau on the opening day of the Ryder Cup. Photograph: Francois Mori/AP

Funniest moment

Im lost, Im sorry Justin Thomas is completely unaware his father is writing a Ryder Cup diary for a newspaper in Kentucky as he is asked in a press conference whether there is shame attached to a sportswriter in the family. Am I missing something? EM

During their final press conference Jordan Spieth teased Tiger Woods about his habit of using military lingo. Woods, who had tuned out, blanked him. Spieth waited a beat then said: Good talk, Tiger. AB

Bubba Watson and Webb Simpson making a treble-bogey six to halve the par-three 2nd against Sergio Garca and Alex Norn during the Saturday foursomes. Incredibly, Watson and Norn and then Webb all went into the water yet the Europeans missed two putts for the hole. SI

By a distance the European teams calling out at their press conference of the stunningly self-regarding American golf writer who had predicted their downfall in apocalyptic terms. He will go unnamed here (which will irk him) but he took his licks then rushed to social media to glory in his instant fame. Donald Trump has more self-awareness than this comedian. KM

Patrick Reed playfully shushing the crowd after beating Tyrrell Hatton. The Masters champion cant catch a break whatever he does, but hopefully this self-deprecating callback followed by genuine applause for the gallery and warm congratulations for Europe wins him some new fans. SM

In 2020 Europe will…

Be well served by keeping Thomas Bjrn as part of the Ryder Cup fold. His captaincy was outstanding. EM

Lose to a US team built around Justin Thomas, Jordan Spieth and a rejuvenated Patrick Reed on a course set up to play to the Americans strengths. AB

Its too early to say, but they must have a chance of holding on to the Ryder Cup given its being played on the rugged links of Whistling Straits, a course that suits them more than Hazeltine did in 2016. SI

Be even stronger, with the steady maturing of Jon Rahm and Tommy Fleetwood. With any luck, Francesco Molinari will be there to reach for a fourth Ryder Cup triumph, and maybe by then Rory McIlroy has sorted out his putting woes. KM

Either go into the singles 10-6 up, or 10-6 down. SM

Read more: http://www.theguardian.com/us

[portmack]

bored n sad

1. DO YOU SLEEP WITH YOUR CLOSET DOORS OPEN OR CLOSED?- idc

2. DO YOU TAKE THE SHAMPOOS AND CONDITIONER BOTTLES FROM HOTELS?- no

3. DO YOU SLEEP WITH YOUR SHEETS TUCKED IN OR OUT?- out i hate when theyre in 

4. HAVE YOU STOLEN A STREET SIGN BEFORE?- no

5. DO YOU LIKE TO USE POST-IT NOTES?- i like them as bookmarks and sometimes ill have to do lists on them

6. DO YOU CUT OUT COUPONS BUT THEN NEVER USE THEM?- occasionally 

7. WOULD YOU RATHER BE ATTACKED BY A BIG BEAR OR A SWARM OF BEES?- bear 

8. DO YOU HAVE FRECKLES?- no

9. DO YOU ALWAYS SMILE FOR PICTURES?- eh

10. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST PET PEEVE?- when people are late

11. DO YOU EVER COUNT YOUR STEPS WHEN YOU WALK?- all the time

12. HAVE YOU PEED IN THE WOODS?- probably

13. HAVE YOU EVER POOPED IN THE WOODS?- no

14. DO YOU EVER DANCE EVEN IF THERES NO MUSIC PLAYING?- eh

15. DO YOU CHEW YOUR PENS AND PENCILS?- no

16. HOW MANY PEOPLE HAVE YOU SLEPT WITH THIS WEEK?- 0

17. WHAT SIZE IS YOUR BED?- twin xl

18. WHAT IS YOUR SONG OF THE WEEK?- new york by st vincent

19. IS IT OK FOR GUYS TO WEAR PINK?- sure

20. DO YOU STILL WATCH CARTOONS?- yeah

21. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE MOVIE?- idk

22. WHERE WOULD YOU BURY HIDDEN TREASURE IF YOU HAD SOME?- my bank account

23. WHAT DO YOU DRINK WITH DINNER?- water

24. WHAT DO YOU DIP A CHICKEN NUGGET IN?- i dont eat meat

25. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FOOD?- croissants 

26. WHAT MOVIES COULD YOU WATCH OVER AND OVER AGAIN AND STILL LOVE?- foodfight (2012)

27. LAST PERSON YOU KISSED/KISSED YOU?- nah

28. WERE YOU EVER A BOY/GIRL SCOUT?- no

29. WOULD YOU EVER STRIP OR POSE NUDE IN A MAGAZINE?- not at the moment

30. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WROTE A LETTER TO SOMEONE ON PAPER?- yeah

31. CAN YOU CHANGE THE OIL ON A CAR?- i cant even drive

32. EVER GOTTEN A SPEEDING TICKET?- no

33. EVER RAN OUT OF GAS?- no

34. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE KIND OF SANDWICH?- not a fan

35. BEST THING TO EAT FOR BREAKFAST?- pancakes

36. WHAT IS YOUR USUAL BEDTIME?- anytime

37. ARE YOU LAZY?- not really 

38. WHEN YOU WERE A KID, WHAT DID YOU DRESS UP AS FOR HALLOWEEN?- idk

39. WHAT IS YOUR CHINESE ASTROLOGICAL SIGN?- boar

40. HOW MANY LANGUAGES CAN YOU SPEAK?- uh the closest to being fluent was italian but i used to be able to half speak spanish and latin

41. DO YOU HAVE ANY MAGAZINE SUBSCRIPTIONS?- used to have a fourfourtwo one but not anymore

42. WHICH ARE BETTER: LEGOS OR LINCOLN LOGS?- legos

43. ARE YOU STUBBORN?- only when im right

44. WHO IS BETTER: LENO OR LETTERMAN?- idc

45. EVER WATCH SOAP OPERAS?- no

46. ARE YOU AFRAID OF HEIGHTS?- no

47. DO YOU SING IN THE CAR?- no

48. DO YOU SING IN THE SHOWER?- no

49. DO YOU DANCE IN THE CAR?- no

50. EVER USED A GUN?- no

51. LAST TIME YOU GOT A PORTRAIT TAKEN BY A PHOTOGRAPHER?- senior pictures in high school

52. DO YOU THINK MUSICALS ARE CHEESY?- yeah 

53. IS CHRISTMAS STRESSFUL?- yeah

54. EVER EAT A PIEROGI?- not since i was like 6

55. FAVORITE TYPE OF FRUIT PIE?- i dont eat pie

56. OCCUPATIONS YOU WANTED TO BE WHEN YOU WERE A KID?- soccer player or vet

57. DO YOU BELIEVE IN GHOSTS?- eh

58. EVER HAVE A DEJA-VU FEELING?- sure

59. DO YOU TAKE A VITAMIN DAILY?- not currently

60. DO YOU WEAR SLIPPERS?- no

61. DO YOU WEAR A BATH ROBE?- no

62. WHAT DO YOU WEAR TO BED?- usually sweatpants and a tshirt

63. WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CONCERT?- not counting music festivals i think owl city/maroon 5/vv brown

64. WALMART, TARGET, OR KMART?- target

65. NIKE OR ADIDAS?- abibas

66. CHEETOS OR FRITOS?- pringles

67. PEANUTS OR SUNFLOWER SEEDS?- i dont like either

68. EVER HEAR OF THE GROUP TRES BIEN?- idk

69. EVER TAKE DANCE LESSONS?- we had to take a dance class in 5th grade and we learned choreography to a high school musical song

 70. IS THERE A PROFESSION YOU PICTURE YOUR FUTURE SPOUSE DOING?- no

71. CAN YOU CURL YOUR TONGUE?- yeah

72. EVER WON A SPELLING BEE?- no

73. HAVE YOU EVER CRIED BECAUSE YOU WERE SO HAPPY?- yeah

74. OWN ANY RECORD ALBUMS?- several

75. OWN A RECORD PLAYER?- yeah

76. DO YOU REGULARLY BURN INCENSE?- no

77. EVER BEEN IN LOVE?- hm 

78. WHO WOULD YOU LIKE TO SEE IN CONCERT?- tbh ive seen all my favorite favorite bands i think, but maybe hop along

79. WHAT WAS THE LAST CONCERT YOU SAW?- saintseneca/yuck

80. HOT TEA OR COLD TEA?- coffee

81. TEA OR COFFEE?- coffee

82. SUGAR COOKIES OR SNICKERDOODLES?- either

83. CAN YOU SWIM WELL?- well enough

84. CAN YOU HOLD YOUR BREATH WITHOUT HOLDING YOUR NOSE?- yeah

85. ARE YOU PATIENT?- you could say that

86. DJ OR BAND AT A WEDDING?- im not a fan of weddings

87. EVER WON A CONTEST?- yeah

88. HAVE YOU EVER HAD PLASTIC SURGERY?- no

89. WHICH ARE BETTER: BLACK OR GREEN OLIVES?- i dont eat olives

90. CAN YOU KNIT OR CROCHET?- no

91. BEST ROOM FOR A FIREPLACE?- no room

92. DO YOU WANT TO GET MARRIED?- not really

93. IF MARRIED, HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN MARRIED?

94. WHO WAS YOUR HIGH SCHOOL CRUSH?- someone that turned out to be a hardcore republican but i didnt know that at the time

95. DO YOU CRY AND THROW A FIT UNTIL YOU GET YOUR OWN WAY?- no

96. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?- i have dogs

97. DO YOU WANT KIDS?- no

98. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE COLOR? - bue

99. DO YOU MISS ANYONE RIGHT NOW?- not really

Tell me the 3 best things about you.- im reliable, thats all i can think of

On a scale of 1-10, how strict are/were your parents?- they werent strict with me because i was well behaved and did well in school so probably like 1-2

Who was your worst teacher? Why?- my ap english teacher probably

Who was your favorite teacher? Why?- i like my archaeology professor

Which would you pick: being world-class attractive, a genius or famous for doing something great?- idk

Who are the 3 greatest living musicians?- joanna newsom

If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?- everything

What was your favorite toy growing up?- idk

Name 3 celebrities you most admire.- i dont really care about celebrities

Name a celebrity you think is lame.

What accomplishment are you most proud of?- i guess being about to graduate college

Which of your friends are you proudest of? Why?- not really sure who considers me a friend anymore

What’s the most beautiful place you’ve ever been?- barcelona

What are your 3 favorite movies?- foodfight, foodfight, foodfight

Which historical figure would you like to be?- dont care

What’s the right age to get married?- whenever you want to

Tell me 3 things you remember about kindergarten.- i could probably name at least half my classmates

What paper that you’ve written are you most proud of?- ive only written 3? maybe 4 papers all throughout college and im not really proud of any of them they were just assignments to me

What’s your favorite ice cream flavor?- black raspberry or nutterbutter

What’s your favorite holiday?- im not a holiday guy

If you could eat only 3 foods for the rest of your life, what would they be?- i basically already do that

If you could be a cartoon character for a week, who would you be?- thats a good question but im not gonna answer it

What’s one choice you really regret?- several choices i made around age 13

What’s a great book you’ve read recently?- i havent read a real book in a few years :-(

Do you feel like a leader or a follower?- more of a leader

If you could ask your pet 3 questions, what would they be?- why are you a rat

What’s the most courageous thing you’ve ever done?- not die

Who would play you in a movie of your life?- me

If you could be an Olympic athlete, in what sport would you compete?- idk i guess soccer or tennis maybe snowboarding 

If you had to live in a different state, what would it be?- ive lived in 3 states

What living person, other than family members, do you most admire?- hm

What has been your favorite family vacation?- honestly probably random places in Pennsylvania thats vague but those are usually fun

If you could choose your own nickname, what would it be?- idk

Who is the funniest person you know?- some guy from high school

What’s your favorite thing about one of your grandparents?- my grandma is wild

Do you ever talk to yourself? When and what do you say?- not out loud 

When you’re having a bad day, what do you do to make yourself feel better?- suffer 

What’s your favorite smell in the whole world?- i cant smell well my nose doesnt work

What do you think is the greatest invention of all time?- computers

Using one word, how would you describe your family?- mess

Would you rather win an Olympic medal, an Academy Award or the Nobel Peace prize?- nobel but not the peace prize

What’s your favorite time of day?- afternoon

What’s your favorite season?- fall

What’s the one food you could never bring yourself to eat?- i dont eat most things

If you could ask the President one question, what would it be?- fuck you

If you could pick a new first name, what would it be?- theres a couple i have in mind

What’s your dream job?- i wish i knew

Cake or pie?- cake

What’s the best part about having siblings?- someone to play vidya games with

What is the scariest movie you’ve ever seen?- i dont watch scary movies

If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would it be?-italy

What is your favorite family tradition?- we dont have many

Who’s your celebrity crush?- eyes emoji

What trait do you like the most about yourself?- hm

What are you good at?- school

What fictional character do you wish you could meet?- theres a long list

What’s the first thing you do when you get home from a trip?- sleep

Would you rather spend five days exploring Disney or New York City?- disney since i live near nyc and hate it

Whose parents do/did you wish you had?- what

If you could shop for free at one store, which one would you choose?- probably an electronics store

What personal trait has gotten you in the most trouble?- im kind of blunt without realizing it idk if thats a personality trait

Who is your favorite athlete?- who do you think

Would you rather be the most popular kid in school or the smartest kid in school?- i was close to the latter already

What do you like to do on a rainy day?- sleep

What is your favorite thing about the beach?- idk the beach makes me sad these days

If you could be anywhere else right now, where would it be?- asleep

What is your favorite Disney movie?- lilo and stitch

If someone made a movie of your life would it be a drama, a comedy, a romantic-comedy, action film, or science fiction?- dark comedy 

Name a product or service you love so much that you’d happily be that company’s spokesperson.- probably none

If you were guaranteed to be successful in a different profession, what would you want to do?- i wish i knew

What’s the worst thing you did as a kid?- something i deeply regret

What is your favorite day of the week?- thursday

Which super power would you like to have and why?- shape shifting

3, If you were a bicycle, what part would you be?- the brakes

4If you were a t-shirt, what colour would you be and why?- black