#i cant even be bothered to explain all the nonsense

[risaceofhearts]

Trying to summon the spite and/or motivation to study for my exam on Thursday. I've gone through this subject 3 times now (I started it 4 times but I stopped early last year because it was giving me panic attacks) and I'm so so tired.

I was doing alright and got a really good grade for the first exam so the bare minimum is enough for the coming exam but every time I try to study theres more clown shit from the teachers and I just want it to be over but for it to be over I have to pass the exam for which I have to study but I dont want to study because I need it to just be over. Get it?

[hecksupremechips]

Just the way Shin Tsukimi’s “mask off” moment is him becoming increasingly frustrated to the point of having a nervous breakdown where all he can do is laugh maniacally because he’s so done with everyone acting so incompetent and not seeing things “as they are” (aka how he sees them) is just. Mwah chefs kiss hes just like me fr 😰

[salad-006]

hi salad

I've been thinking about this for a long time... so, theoretically, can I (or anyone) ship oliver and evelyn (his girlfriend)? you just pointed out that you are not glad to see shipping content, and at the same time your character has a partner.

Honestly i can totally see why this makes me sound like a hypocrite , so let me try to explain it in a bit more detail (INCOMING LONG RAMBLEY RANT)

To put it simply: im acearo. Im one of those who's so heavily detatched from sex and romance that i just have zero interest in it at all, and I never have. So hopefully you can understand how romance being such a massive and reoccurring trope in effectively All media can get pretty tiresome and annoying for someone who doesn't really understand the nuances of love. One of the many reasons I like eddsworld so much is it's one of the few shows out there that's almost Never used romance in any sort of serious or long-lasting way. I can fully enjoy all of the writing.

And this isn't to say I'm AGAINST portrayal of romance in media, obviously it's a huge part of human history in many ways. I think what i truly dislike the most is when shipping stories are introduced via fanon that weren't there before. If that makes sense?? Like I dont like canon romance storylines, but I can just ignore them. But when a fandom turns what's left into a romantic story as well I cant really enjoy the fandom content the same way everyone else does. I don't even bother reading fanfic anymore just because i know it'll aways be there and I'll always be uncomfortable and close out early. (This isn't me demanding everyone stops shipping btw. I've done just fine for years by simply ignoring it. You do you, I'll just look the other way while you do it)

With oli and eli they're dating in cannon, but i never truly ever draw them being like romantic romantic, nor do i ever dive into the intricacies of their relationship. The fact that he's with eli barely has plot relevance in the overarching zomverse story (name patent pending) and that's how I like it. There is no story to them being in love its just how it is, and how it always will be.

This was long and nonsensical so

TLDR: what i dont like more specifically is romance-central stories, not just romance in itself. Oli and elis relationship has no story to it and i never do anything with it, which is why its there. So as long as you're not going too crazy (they're all minors as a reminder) I'm okay with that yeah . (Though realistically i dont think you're really shipping when the pairing already exists lol. The ships already sailed)

[ofcowardiceandkings]

mmh thing because of dad poll

this is such a nearly 5 am post lol

hhh i feel a little odd about my relationship with my parents sometimes because yknow its ... strsnge

ive reflected on it a lot since i was a lot younger as well and its very complicated but like .. ive known for a good long while that im far more emotionally mature and diplomatic than them both lmao

like ... i love them both and ive not got a truly negative relationship with either of them but sometimes its a little hard not to feel exasperated with their antics. i know WHY theyre like this, they both have a lot of trauma and baggage, but i feel like they dealt with it in a less than productive way for various reasons .. and ive tried to help them multiple times as well but at this point ive washed my hands of the matter because it just doesnt work , id much rather see them happier but you cant help people who dont want to help themselves

i dont wanna go into huge amounts of depth or air out their nonsense, but it explains a lot lol ... one being a csa survivor who had kids very young but doesnt actually like young children much at all, and still has problems with stubbornness and accountability/consequences and anger/patience .. and the other losing his mother very young, working in a new industry through connections very young (but thoroughly enjoying it) only to be shat out the other end with no recourse or way forward, losing his brother to a family drama related murder (yes really), and falling into alcoholism very much like his mother and other lost industry friends (he doesnt have many friends at all now), then having a minor stroke and losing memories words and personality traits, while also not wanting to bother people with his own feelings ?? plus neither set of grandparents was exactly perfect .... its a c c c combo ... both of them are sort of shut-ins especially my dad and i suspect if we lived further away from my maternal family my mum wouldnt do much either

and the bickering drives me nuts lol moving out was the best thing i did for my own wellbeing its VERY hard not to snap back at them sometimes like IM the parent

im not bitter either about how they definitely contributed to my anxiety disorder, they acknowledge it as well so its not a Big Issue and even though its shit i feel like its made me a more considerate person than i could have been. im generally not .. bitter its not really the right word ,, nor is sour either ? but at least on my end i feel a little melancholy about it all

id very much like to help but theres only so much attention i have to give on encouraging people who usually dont want to hear it when im dealing with my own shit

idk its .. strange

but like just fucking go to therapy jfskdjskdj jesus

anyway

yeah

[jabberwockprince]

spoilers for the chapter and nonsensical word vomit but

when sophia and sonetto talk at the beach. and sophia talks about 37 like 37 is so very far away out of her reach by virtue of being so different, the only person who can see the absolute truth. talking about how she feels useless because all she can do is do these small insignificant tasks that no one else (no one important, unlike her) should be bothered with. how her mistake caused the greatest grief in her and 37's lives (even if 37 didnt see it as such)

and shes telling this to sonetto

who feels so very disconnected from vertin, the only person who can experience the "Storm". who wanted so desperately to protect and follow vertin now that theyre together, to make up for what she did when they were kids (letting vertin, and the other kids, go outside)

like. hello. can anyone hear me. are you seeing the parallels. im speaking directly into your brain. of course 37 likes sonetto, bc sonetto is a parallel to sophia

i cant word it properly rn but. something about how 37 and sophia's relationship could easily represent vertin and sonetto's relationship too, in a way. do you see it. the way they all contrast each other: vertin has been described as cold, aloof, emotionless but shes been mischievous, has sacrificed herself for the sake of others many times, she cares so deeply about everyones. whereas 37 looks cute, innocent, starry eyed and welcoming, but we've seen her lack of empathy in the way she finds pleasure revealing other ppl's numbers before they can realize it themselves, how cruel she can be without even realizing it bc of how little she cares about anything and anyone that isnt within her interests

and then sonetto looks so calm and confident, well-put together and obedient/eager to help like the perfect Foundation martyr, but shes been the most emotional out of the two so far, shes shown nothing but impulse over the course of the main story. sophia is the same, presented as a mediator, down to earth and voice of reason, explaining the rules of the island and all. out of her respective duo, shes the one that makes most sense, who looks the most responsible. but then shes struggling to feel any sense of self worth bc she lacks a number, the most important thing, something she doesnt even quite understand. exactly like how sonetto never understood vertin nor vertin's decision to leave when they were kids but still clings to her

theres just something in there about the "truths" that vertin and 37 hold that urge both sonetto and sophia forward. the former because it helps her understand the world, her beloved childhood friend and deskmate, and the latter because it will help her understand herself, and essence and her fate above all. something abt the way vertin's truth is something she wants to share with as many people as possible, to avoid being alone. while 37's truth is something that continues to isolate her from the world. and how that last part specifically, 37's isolation, is also related to her missing a vital piece of information (the outside world, what happened out there that vertin personally experienced in the "storm") that she couldve only gotten through vertin. the same way 37 had information that only she herself and no one else couldve provided to vertin (the inner world, 37's unique perception of truth and pure fact that she figured out herself)

there are. so many dots and lines in my brain trying to get connected all at once. can you guys see it. the neuron connections. are 37 and sophia's relationship a parallel to vertin and sonetto's, or a warning of what could they be, or two sides of the same coin. whats happening

head....full of math..... <- finished ch05 of r1999

[definitelynotcesia]

Baby

you thought of calling your best friend, choi beomgyu, after waking up from a nightmare. what could go wrong? probably everything.

pairing: choi beomgyu x reader

genre: fluff

word count: 918

warning: tiny bit of suspense and cursing

"im surprised to know you're still alive". these are the first words of the man on the other line as soon as he picked up the phone. you noticed the coarseness in his voice, probably from working too much.

"i don't even get a 'hello' at least?" you asked him back.

"coming from someone who didn't even bother to reply to any of my texts for the past two days?" he replied emphasizing the last part.

"then you could've greeted me with an 'i miss you'?" you replied teasingly.

"im tired, y/n. one more and i will not hesitate to block your dumbass. i swear to the white lady standing behind you" he replied.

"h-hey!" you said running as fast as you could to your bed.

yes, you just woke up from a creepy nightmare yet again. when you can't get yourself to go back to sleep, you decided to call your best friend, beomgyu, thinking he'd entertain you with his nonsense for a while. but it's starting to seem like this is the worst idea.

"hey what's happening?" he asked when he heard weird shuffling noises from the other line. "are you strangling the white lady right now?" he asked jokingly.

"ITS NOT FUNNY!" you yelled feigning a tough font.

though he got surprised, beomgyu quickly realized what's going on. you, being the scaredy cat that you are, are probably bundled up on your own bed right now believing that there's actually a white lady in the room. the thought of your tiny face peaking through the comforter, eyes frantically moving around, made him laugh.

"what? do you want me to come over?" he asked while still laughing.

"no thank you" you quickly replied sensing that he'll tease you to death if you say yes.

"alright, its up to you though. all im saying is—"

"i fucking hate you!" you yelled cutting him off before he could say anything more to creep you out. you pressed the red button on the screen to end the call and proceed to hide under your huge comforter.

"you just watch beomgyu, i'll fucking send you back to hell—"

you were cut off when you heard rustling somewhere on your far right. you swear your heart almost jumped out. you ran about a hundred possible reasons on your mind to explain the sound but the only thing that's stuck on your mind is the face of the creepy smiling lady you saw on your dream.

maybe because you yelled a bad word, or you said the word hell, that you summoned these dark forces? you're aware of how childish that sounded but being rational is the last thing you can do when you're completely alone in your pitch black unit.

it took you few seconds to realize that the rustling you heard is still going on, and it's in fact, a scratching sound. like nails grinding on glass. its getting louder and faster by the minute. you felt your body tense, your heart beating very loud. then, a shiver ran through your spine at the exact same moment the scratching stopped. what the actual fuck.

moments later, you felt the ends of your bed sunk. as if something— someone just sat. it cant be beomgyu because you sure locked the front door, and there's no other way for him to sneak in to scare you.

"OH GOD!" you cried in surprise when you felt your phone vibrate under one of your pillows.

its a text from beomgyu.

open up, im outside.

reading the message gave you the courage to run as fast as you can towards the front door. you even fumbled through the extra lock because your hands are too shaky.

"i was—" you hugged him as soon as you open the door leaving him utterly shocked.

beomgyu noticed how cold your skin felt and that you are slightly shaking. although he is still confused, he hugged you back as well. to which you were thankful because your knees would've given up from that point as it is trembling too much.

"shhh, it's okay. im already here. it's okay, you're safe now" he whispered while gently caressing your back. hearing his words triggered all the pent up fear you had earlier which made you breakdown on his chest. "it's okay, baby. im already here." he continued to whisper comforting words to you.

"i was so scared" you said in between your sniffles.

"i know. im sorry i scared you. im sorry, baby"

you stood there hugging for almost ten minutes before he gently ushered you inside the house. you are still crying and trembling as he settled you in the couch. he quickly got your comforter from your room and prepped the couch.

"move closer to me please" he guided your upper body to a cuddling position. after you both got settled, he continued to stroke your back using his free hand. "go back to sleep now, baby" he said in the most reassuring voice.

it may be weird to admit but having his arms around you felt very secure and warm, the kind that makes you want to stay there forever. you feel safe with his hands gently drawing circles at the small of your back and the sound of his voice whispering words of comfort. you were pretty sure you heard him call you baby since earlier but you couldn't care less. right at this moment, you just felt home in the arms of your best friend.

— end.

cesia's masterlist.

[thcweasley]

Yours

PAIRING : George Weasley X Y/N

SUMMARY : George getting jealous of his twin brother for being closer to you .

WARNINGS : none? Make out? implying things? hehe

WORDS : 1.7k

A/N: lol this hits too close to home, growing up i was shadowed by heather sister :(  I was going to turn this into smut but im not sure.. cos i never wrote a smut before lol.

“Focus on your work Weasley” Snape smacked George Weasley’s head with the book he was holding, causing the whole class to look at his direction.

George was already an easily distracted person to begin with. but today especially, he got his mind somewhere else.

He was looking at you and his twin brother Fred, giggling while trying to figure out snape’s task. All of his life he never thought that he would feel this much jealously towards the older twin. Sure, sometimes it bothers him a bit that people pay more attention to him, or the fact that people always refers them as “Fred & George”, not “George & Fred”. But he knew it’s a silly thing to be bothered about so he always managed to brush it off.

But not today, Fred had been assigned with you. The girl George met on his last solo trip to honeydukes. It shocked him how he never saw you around before, despite being in the same house and grade. But hes glad that he met you. George didn’t like to be cheesy, but he was so sure that you were made for him. Whenever youre around, he just felt so happy. You’re funny, kind, and on top of all you’re prettiest thing he ever seen. Sadly, for him, other people seems to think that way about you.

He introduced you 2 weeks ago to his brother and friends. You seem to get along great with everyone. He liked that, his brother and friends is everything for him. But he cant help it but feeling a little bit jealous. He didn’t wanna admit it but this jealously is most probably because he was insecure about his feeling for you. Before everything he was sure that you fancy him the same way he fancies you. But now, hes not sure. And he hated it, youre supposed to be his girl.

The class that felt so long was finally over. George quickly stood up, walking towards the common room. he just want to burry his face onto his bed now. He felt an arm linking his. “Hey you” it was you. He let out a big sigh, not knowing how to feel right now.

“Hey, did you have a good time today?” He hated how catty he sounded. Knowing you, he knew you wouldn’t able to tell.

“Yeah it was fun. Your brother is hilarious you know that?” He rolled his eyes, feeling his face getting hot.

“Well yeah hes a clown” George answered shortly. Wanting you both could just drop this conversation. He didn’t like this, being jealous of his twin brother.

“ahah yeah true, youre also funny too you know” You leaned your head onto Georges arm. At this point it was hard for him to not just pulls you into a big hug. “Whats your plan for the rest of the day?” You asked looking up on him.

“Im not sure, probably just sleep” George answered looking down to you. You looked so cute leaning on to him.

“Wanna have a study date? Snape’s test tomorrow right?” George’s ears perked up at the word date.

A smile creeps on his face. “Yeah sure”

“Brilliant! I’ll see you in 2 hours then!” You gave his arm a squeeze before you go. Leaving George all smiley by himself.

2 hours later, George found himself getting ready for his study date. He finally going to make a move on you. Its obvious that you fancy him now right? At least you were the one who refers their study session as a study date.

He tried to look around for Fred but he was nowhere to be found. He feels weird do anything without asking for the older brother’s advice. But it was time to go to meet you at the Library and he didn’t want to make you wait, so he just decided to cross his fingers and hope for the best.

“Hey” George greeted you, big smile on his face. You look up at him from the book you were reading, smiling back at him. “You got a lot of stuff here” He sat down beside you, looking at paper and pens in front of him.

“Oh its not mine” You answered. “So, do you have anything you’re particularly struggling with?”

Whilst you tried your best to explain the things that he was struggling with. George was doing his best to stay focus on what youre saying instead of you. He cant help but admire your face, your cheeks, your lips. He wonders how would it feel like you press his lips against yours.

“Are you listening to me George?” You asked, knowing the answer pretty well.

“Uh yeah, im sorry I got distracted” he blinked.

You brought your hand on to his head, messing with his red hair. “you’ve been a bit distracted these days. didn’t you got smacked on your head earlier today by Snape?” you chuckled a bit running your fingers on the back of his head. “Did it hurt?” You tilted her head closer to him, rubbing the back of his head.

He couldn’t seem to think straight at this point. The fact that youre so close to him right now, he could smell your scent. He took a deep breath trying to be brave and make a move. He put his hand on top of yours, pulling it away from his head. “Y/N..” He started, linking his fingers with yours. “I think I like you”

“Yeah?” You chuckled feeling. your cheeks starting to get warm. “Whats going on George? Why are you suddenly so serious?”

“Well, Im not sure how you feel about me. But I got nothing to lose so here I am. I like you” Surprised by his words, you didn’t say anything. So he thought he could just make a move then. He leaned in closer to you getting you lips closer to each other. Not knowing what to do you just close your eyes. He smiled, taking this as a greenlight to proceed his act. Until all of the sudden-

“Your tea is here!!” Fred walked in, causing them to pull away from each other. “Hey that’s my seat George, do you not see the stuffs on the table?” He said as he sat down filling the gap between You and George.

“Fred what are you doing here?” George asked, clearly  frustrated with the situation.

“That’s not how you greet people, my dear brother” He said handing you the tea he was talking about. “Besides, youre not the only one who got invited to this study group. Right Y/N?” You just nod at him feeling flustered, thinking about what could’ve happened if Fred didn’t just walk in.

The next day, George has been avoiding you since last night. He thought you guys shared the same feeling. But yesterday proved him wrong. He was just another friend to you

Snape’s exam was a group work, being Fred’s partner obviously made you work with him for the exam. You looked so happy, George wishes it was him working with you instead of his twin brother. He hated this so much, it’s ridiculous how jealous he felt towards his twin brother right now.

The exam’s finally over, George saw you coming up to him from the corner of his eyes. “Hey” you greeted him. “Wanna go to Three Broomstick later? I haven’t really seen you all week”

“Who’s coming?” He asked, hoping this time its just the two of you. And everything that he thought about last night wasn’t true.

“Uh everyone. Fred, Lee, Angelina and others im not sure” George snickered. How stupid of him to think that you wanna be alone with him. How stupid of him to think he got a chance with you.

“I think im gonna pass on that” he took a deep breath. “Im tired. Ill see you around” He left you dumb folded, walking away towards his room.

The night comes around. The common room feels empty, his friends had left him for Three Broomstick. George just chilling alone on his bed when he heard someone opened the door.

“George?” You walked towards him, sitting at the end of his bed “Hey, im just.. I just wanna make sure everything is okay”

“Why you here” George answered bitterly. “Arent you suppose to be out with your friends, with my brother?”

“Well yeah but I wanna check up on you. And talk about last night..”

“What do you wanna talk about Y/N?” He took a deep breath. “I already get it, you see me as a friend. If anything, you like Fred more than me. I get it don’t worry. Everyone always picks him over me, im used to it”

“George…” you scotched in closer too him, trying to stop him from rambling all these nonsenses.

“Im not even sure why I thought you like me, he is the better twin. Im just me. I just thought I have a chance with you. Throughout my life, ive always get hands down from my siblings, share with my siblings.” He realised how ridiculous he sounded but it didn’t stop him. “I love how you get along with my friends. But, i just thought, I thought youre my person. Finally someone I can proudly say mine. I thought you feel the same way as I do…” Georges voice was getting quitter when he felt your hand grabbing his. “I like you a lot and I get that you don’t feel the same way. So if youre coming here to explain that i-“

His words were cut off by your lips crashing to his. “You never let me speak Georgie”  You murmured against his lips “I don’t know how you got it all wrong” you kissed his cheek lightly. “I didn’t know you felt that way. George. I like you, im your person. Ive always been“

With a big smile he pulled in for another kiss. He held on to your waist pulling you closer to him, positioning you onto his lap. You threw your and around his neck, deepening the kiss whilst his hands lazily griped your waist.

You can feel something poking between the inner part of your legs. With a slight smile you press your legs more on to him, grinding it against him. Earning a low groan from him.

He held your hips down on him, so both of you can feel more of the friction. His lips travelled to your jaw and to the back of your neck. You could feel his hot breath, sending shivers down your spine as he moved his lips closer to your ears. “Prove it” OKAY SO Let me know if you want a part 2 smut off of this HAHAH.

hehe part 2

this was quite hard to write cos i feel bad for him ahaha. this is loosely based on a true story. but i never got my Y/N :’)

MY OTHER WORKS follow me / send request / talk to me! im lonely (if u send me anonymously maybe click here) my collaborative ford anglia playlist Christmas with the Weasley playlist

[luminousdelight]

Multisectional ventpost hhhhh

Okay, the first thing here is rly just, I really dont like being in that friend server im in kinda (yk dori, that one i invited you in once). Theres like- 2 people that kinda ruin it for me completely, like I really wanna get out of it, which like- is kinda awful because thats the only place I really feel like I can stay rn- im too anxious to just suddenly start talking in random servers and irl is obv not an option for me. The reason those ppl r like a problem is just, one of them cant go 2 messages without complaining about either "commies" or "trannies" and is overall just an annoying person with how often they bring this stuff up along with their sentiment, and they sexualize alot its rly uncomfortable. The other one isnt really as annoying but still- it makes me feel uncomfortable being around them kinda, theyre pretty transphobic too but at least they dont mention it on their own. They also think the Andrew Tate getting banned from his socials stuff was unfair because he was just "ironic" so- yeah... (Late edit but theres also someone that cant shut up about how Honkai is better than Genshin and it drives me insane like yeah, maybe, idk, but can you shut up about it sometime maybe actually and not mention it every 10 seconds?? We get it Oh yeah and they did say some pretty trnasphobic stuff as well. At least those 3 are the only ones). I really dont like being there

Another thing is like, I really really hate venting ab the same thing to the same person multiple times because it just feels like- ill be kinda repetitive about it eventually :,D and a sorry for that only works so many times. So I just end up bottling up alot of stuff because im rly afraid to bother ppl too much about it. The same is a bit with these public vents too but- its not that bad there at least, my fear there is rather that all of that falls on deaf ears (or that a person I dont want reading about my struggles ends up reading it, like the ones in the server i mentioned) ;w;

And another thingy vent with that ex-(??? | hopefully not ;w;) friend. I really dont think things happened like they played it out like- idk quite know how to explain it but- theres just alot of things that just wouldnt make sense to me in that case.. I know I keep telling myself I should let go ab this over and over again but I rly cant- I just feel extremely convinced I mustve done smth wrong ;w; and in that case I just end up extremely hoping there might still be a chance to get my feelings reciprocated again if any of this just happened to be a huge misunderstanding. But its also the only part of this I really have any control over by now and this thought process just keeps making me feel more tense and tense the longer this situation goes on i just ghdjghjsdhdfhjs ;A; So I just rly wanna let go just if thats not the case but hsjhdfjhf its so hard qwp I really dont wanna be too pushy with this either, and im also not sure if they might even find out ab these posts and all that, wouldnt rly be that unexpected tho i feel, i kinda hope they will, it would make things alot easier. Please save me from this, im begging --- ;-;

Edit edit!!: Ik my reasoning is a bit nonsensical for this, I was just in complete denial still when its clearly not worth it by any metric, even if they wouldve responded by now

[relatable-trxsh]

In Too Deep

Summary: Youre the new girl in the Lennox and Blue quickly takes a very special liking to you.

A/N: Hi! Sorry I suck at summarys I put a warning before the smut starts and when it ends. My requests are OPEN!

Warnings: S M U T 18+ , Soft Blue, Daddy kink, Male oral reciving, cursing, Name calling.

You scream as the two men drag you into the Lennox. You fight against them with every fiber of your being but they are much stronger than you. That didn’t stop you though, you kicked, scream, you threw your body in every direction praying they would somehow lose grip. 

“Please let me go! I didn’t do anything wrong please!” Heads of the staff turned your way, some held a sympathetic gaze others scoffed. Finally, the men stopped walking but your pleas continued, that was until you heard a calm, slightly deep voice speak. 

“Now now, there’s no reason to cry.” you look up just as a hand reaches over and wipes a tear from your face.

“Please I didn’t do anything wrong.” your pleas have quieted down as you look at the man before you.

“Unfortunately I have been told otherwise. What they are accusing you with cant be taken lightly, but you should be glad they sent you here and not some prison.” He moves his hand to your chin and lifts your head a little. “My name is Blue Jones, I run this place. Now come I will show you around, introduce you to the rest of the girls. He smiles and gives your chin a little squeeze before the guards return to their firm grip. As you walk you continuously try to fight out of their grip. Blue explains the rules until you reach a dance studio. There are girls lined up doing various stretches. “Vera this is Y/N, she is our newest patient.” She looks you up and down before nodding. 

“I have a very strict set of rules girl. You follow them, do as your told and there will be no problems.” She spoke in a thick accent. You look at her saying nothing, only trying to fight your arms from the guard’s grip. Blue smirks and Vera sighs. “The quiet ones always cause trouble.”

“You should have seen the fight she gave the guards coming in.” Vere leans in close to your face.

“I don’t put up with nonsense, I am here to help you but I can’t do that if you fight against me understood?” you nod. “Good, I can take her from here. Go join the rest of the girls.” You silently walk and stand beside them. A girl with reddish hair looks at you with a smile.

“Hi I’m Rocket, this is my sister Sweet Pea, that’s Blondie, Baby Doll, and Amber.” You give them all a small wave.

“I’m Y/N” Sweet Pea looks at you and chuckles.

“She’s never gonna make it in here.” Rocket swats her sister’s shoulder.

“Hush, she must be terrified it’s her first day here.”

“Yeah well, it one gets worse from here so you better toughen up Buttercup.” Blondie smiles.

“I like that buttercup I think it suits her.”

You spend the rest of the afternoon practicing dancing, you didn’t fully understand why but the girls told you they would explain after chores.

You felt lost walking around the building, you were desperately trying to find the rooms where the beds were but somehow you ended up at Blues office. You knocked quietly, your heart rate picking up when you heard him sigh from the other side of the door. 

“Come in.” You walked in quietly, staying in the doorway.

“I’m sorry to bother Mr.Jones but I’m lost. I was trying to find the room.” He quickly sits up.

“No no you aren’t bothering at all. Come in, close the door.” You nod and do what he says before walking further into the room, standing in front of his desk. “How have the other girls been treating you?” You bite your lips

“They have been very kind Mr.Jones, they even gave me a nickname. Buttercup.” He chuckles. Blue couldn’t lie, he loved the way his name sounded coming from your mouth. “But I do have a question Mr.Jones if that’s alright…” He nods sitting back in his chair, taking a sip of his whiskey.

“Ask away buttercup” His voice sent shivers down your spine.

“Why does Dr. Gorski have us dance?” He seems a little taken back by your question but doesn’t hesitate.

“On the weekends we do something special, you girls earn me some extra money by putting on a show for some special people, and if those special people spit out some more cash they get a night of fun with one of you, sometimes two.” You were completely shocked by his words.

“You’re going to whore us out?” your words come out with a harsh edge. Blue stands up and walks over to you. 

“You don’t get to judge me Y/N.” he grabs your jaw again and you can’t stop tears from welling up in your eyes front the harshness of his grip. “It’s all part of the game.”

“Sir” your voice is barely a whisper. “Blue please I cant…” You look down at the floor embarrassed, tears falling down your already pink cheeks. 

“And why not? Look me in the eyes when you speak to me Y/N” you eyes reluctantly meet his again.

“I’m a virgin Mr.Jones” He couldn’t stop the smirk from falling on his lips, the vulnerability in your eyes excited him especially since it was a complete 180 from the way you were acting earlier.

“My my, sweet little Butter Cup a virgin.” He clicked his tongue and used his thumb to wipe away a tear from your cheek. “You know a lot of men would pay a pretty penny to fuck a virgin especially one as beautiful as you.” Your lip quivered at his words. “But I have half a mind to keep you all to myself. I always have to share my toys, I never get to keep one for myself, but you,” he sighs. “You are something special and I don’t want to share you.” He leans his forehead against yours, you can’t stop the tears from falling.

“I don’t want to be a whore Blue.” Your voice shook as you closed your eyes.

“If you’re a good girl for me buttercup then you won’t be. I will keep you all to myself, my own little toy.” his hands slid down your shoulders and laned on your waist pulling you closer. If sticking with him meant that you didn’t have to be at other men’s disposal that it’s something you could handle. You open your eyes and look at him.

“Promise I’ll only be yours Blue, promise you won’t let anyone else touch me.” you were terrified he wouldn’t keep his word. Blue says nothing, he just kisses down your jaw to your neck where he starts to bite and suck on the soft untouched skin.

*SMUT*

“Let’s see how good you are for daddy first.” He runs his thumb across your lips before pressing it into your mouth. You take it without protest, swirling your tongue around it and sucking it causing a small moan to leave Blues lips. “Are you sure you’re a Virgin Buttercup?.” You gulp a little before nodding. He smirks. “Get on your knees I want to see what else that tongue can do” You do as your told and sink to your knees. Your hands quickly find the buttons of his pants undoing them with ease, just as you are pulling down his pants, taking his boxers with them. Your eyes widen as they land on his thick large cock.

You lean forward, looking up at Blue as you run your tongue on the underside of his already hard member, he moans as his hand finds your hair tangling into it. 

“Come one princess, stop teasing Daddy and take me in your mouth already.” You bite your lip before leaning forward again, taking as much of him in your mouth as you could and using your hand on the rest. “Now bob up and down princess and use that soft tongue of yours.” You hum in response which causes a low moan from Blue. You start slow, moving your head and swirling your tongue a bit, you wanted to please Blue, you wanted him to want you so you begin to quicken your pace taking him as deep as you could. Your eyes welled up as you tried not to gag.

“Fuck, such a good girl. You look so beautiful with daddy in your mouth.” Blues moans and praises were intoxicating. He pulled your hair harder and you jerked your hands faster. “You want daddy to cum in your mouth” Blue moaned through gritted teeth. 

“Yes, daddy please” You moan and bob your head faster, taking Blue cock in your mouth till he hit the back of your throat. It didn’t take long for his seed to coat your throat as he thrust into your mouth. He slowly pulls out, leaving your mouth with a pop.

 “Now swallow like a good girl.” You do as your told and open your mouth showing him. Blue taps under your chin signaling you to stand you. You do so, rubbing your knees from being down so long. Blue runs his thumb over your bottom lip and smiles. “You did good buttercup. Now let’s get you taken care of before you have to go off to bed.” You bite your lip getting nervous.

“You don’t have to do that Blue, Dr.Gorski must be wondering where I am” You straighten your dress but before you could do anything else Blue grabs your by the waist with one hand and slide the other under your dress, teasing your clit from the outside of your underwear. 

“Nonsense Y/N don’t you worry about Vera, you seem to forget who’s in charge here.” He leans in close and kisses just under your ear before whispering. “Plus I can’t leave my good girl all bothered after she took me so well.” You clung to Blue panting into his neck as he rubbed your clit. He pulled down your underwear and picked you up, setting you on the edge of his desk. Blue leaned in and kissed you rough and full of pure lust. You pull him close tangling your fingers in his hair.

“Please Blue, please fuck me” He chuckles at your eagerness and pulled your dress over your head before kissing down your neck to your chest, taking one of your nipples in his mouth and rolling his thumb over the other hardened bud. He looks up at you with a smirk. 

“More, beg me more pretty girl. Show me how badly you want to be my little pet.” You moan as he swirls his tongue around your nipple. 

“Please Blue, I want you to fill me up. God Blue fuck me make me your whore” Your words drove Blue absolutely wilds. He stood up and pulled off his shirt before spreading your legs, before slowly pushing his cock inside you, stretching your walls. You dig your nails into Blues back and bury your head in his neck. 

“B-Blue its hurts” you whimper and he gently cups your face kissing you softly. 

“Shh baby girl just give it a second and then it will feel much better I promise.” You holding him tighter. It surprised you to see Blue being so gentle, he even surprised himself. It wasn’t like him at all to treat someone with such softness but he couldn’t help it with you. Blue began slowly thrusting into you until your whimpers became moans. Your head fell back as you arched your body into his.

“Please Daddy go faster, fuck” Tangled your fingers in his hair and wrapped your legs around his waist trying to pull him deeper.

“Fuck baby girl you feel so good on daddy’s cock. So tight and wet” you moan louder pulling his hair a little hard which earns a deep moan from Blue.

“I can’t last much longer daddy” you moan putting your face back in his neck.

“Come for me baby girl, come on daddy’s cock.” His words completely undo you and you clench around his cock as your legs shake. It doesn’t take Blue long to cum again, filling your tight pussy up with his seed.

END OF SMUT

 You both stay like that for a moment, a panting, sweaty mess in each other’s arms. Blue was completely beside himself, he could believe the infatuation he had growing for you. He saw you with such vulnerability in your eyes that all he wanted to do was keep you in his arms, and that’s exactly what he planned to do. You were going to be his and only his. Blue pulled away brushing his thumb over your bottom lip. 

“Let’s get you cleaned up and to bed buttercup. Tomorrow we have some meetings to attend to.” You look up at him confused. 

“Meetings?”

“Yes, i told you you are my little pet. I will Inform Vera to get your outfit ready.” you bite your lip and nod not wanting to argue. He walks away for a moment and returns with a warm wet towel, withing up between your legs before putting back on both of your clothes. “Now get to bed Buttercup it’s down the hall to your left.” You nod and give him a quick soft kiss before going to the rooms. The rest of the girls were already there most asleep except Sweet Pea. 

“He’ll get bored of you. Toss you aside like you were nothing to begin with and then throw you away like a whore.” There was a harsh resentment in her voice. You take a deep breath nervously biting you lip.

“Well im in too deep now arent I?” Sweet Pea lets out a dry laugh. 

“Yeah I guess so.”

[hopelessly-aro]

okay but queerplatonic matchablossom and renga (in which everyone’s aro-spec and half of them are ace-spec too)

everyone thinking matchablossom are dating and it really annoys them but they ignore it because explaining their actual relationship would be far too complicated

reki and langa closer than best friends and spending all their time together because they just vibe really well, but neither ever considers being together romantically

langa accidentally letting slip he’s aroace to reki but continues talking in the hopes that reki didnt notice. reki looks it up and is confused but doesnt know how to ask

everyone (other kids at school, miya and shadow, langa’s mum, reki’s family) all giving them those looks that say “youre clearly in love but you dont know it”

someone saying “oh yeah its obvious they’re in love, I just dont know if they’re dating” which reki overhears and it makes him really uncomfortable

he knows he doesnt like langa like that and he doesnt want langa to like him that way either. but he doesnt know why its so upsetting

cherry notices reki has something bothering him and reki asks “does it make you uncomfortable when we all tease you and joe for being obliviously in love?”

cherry sighs and says yeah. people just assume two people cant have a close bond without it being romantic and/or sexual

cherry is demiromantic and demisexual, joe is frayromantic and allosexual. cherry loves Joe romantically, joes loves cherry platonically. they are very happy in their queer-platonic relationship thats a middle ground between the two, and with joe having much more short-term things with other people

cherry describes QPRs more generally, and talks a bit about the aromantic and asexual spectrums, but recommends reki should do other research and maybe talk to langa about it

so reki researches and is kinda having a crisis because aromantic kinda sounds like him and also he wishes he could just vibe with langa for his whole life and not bother with all this relationship nonsense

he eventually screws up the courage to ask langa about how he knew he was aroace and langa tells how it took several years to work it out and come to terms with it and get used to the labels cause he was basically going through it alone

reki listens to what langa says and he’s kinda holding back tears cause this is A Lot. he asks about QPRs and langa kinda goes off on a tangent about how much he wants that, and describing it

reki takes a while to process all this (and cries more because this really is A Lot). then he goes back to langa and says he thinks he might be aro (not ace tho) and that langa’s description of a QPR is what reki always subconsciously imagined his ideal relationship to be

they decide that if they need a label for their closer-than-best-friends relationship then they’ll call it QPR, but basically they’re gonna just keep vibing

tho they do now show even more affection for each other than before because they’re no longer worried the other will take it the wrong way, and honestly fuck whatever anyone else thinks

they’re skating through the near-empty park hand in hand (idc if thats dangerous, its cute) and pass by joe and cherry sitting on a bench. reki and cherry share a knowing nod and a smile

[aizawaorkuroo]

Missed You

Ship: Dabi x reader

Rated: Explicit

Word Count: 2k

Summary: Dabi meant to come see you last week. He really did. He just got busy, but he’s here now whether you like it or not. 

Warnings: Language, Choking, Biting, Vaginal Fingering, dubcon(ish not really)

AN: dabi’s fucking weird lmao

________________________

Dabi closes the door to your apartment gently behind him. He’s late by maybe a week. But hey, who can blame him? He’s a busy man, and at the end of the day, you’re not dating. Not really. He’s not going to take you out to fancy dinners or hold your hand while you walk through the park. Well, at least not when the sun’s up. It’s not his style. 

And even if he wanted to, he can’t. He can’t give you all the things he knows you want. But whenever he brings it up, you put your hands on your hips and jerk your chin at him, insisting that you don’t need any of that sentimental crap. But he knows you deserve better. Whatever.

Despite his edge, something sharp pokes at his heart when he hears the shower running. He kicks off his shoes and lets his jacket fall from his shoulders, a cruel smirk pulling at his lips. He shuffles towards your bathroom, and as he gets closer, he realizes he can hear music streaming through the door. Perfect.

The door opens softly, waves of humidity flowing into his face along with the notes of whatever band you were listening to. Your voice reaches his ears as you hum along to the music, words intermingling with nonsense. The wicked grin on his face stretches wide as he jerks an arm out to yank back your shower curtain.

A scream claws its way out of your throat, and you stumble trying to cover yourself with your arms. Your eyes focus on puckered patchwork skin, and you breathe out his name, hanging your head as you sigh. Dabi smirks as you shake your head, eyeing the way water rolls off your body. The water splashes out of the shower, forming puddles on the floor. You turn your gaze up, fixing Dabi with a glare.  

“Dabi,” you hiss. “Mrs. Mai is gonna get mad about the water.” He sneers as your concern, pulling off his shirt before fumbling with his belt.

“If that old hag downstairs gives you any shit, let me know.” His voice is calm and cruel, sending chills down your spine. You cross your arms and try to ignore the way your stomach flips when Dabi’s eyes seize the newly exposed flesh.

“Dabi.” His eyes lazily trail up your body before landing on your eyes. He’s really here. You bite down on your tongue, ignoring the sour taste in your mouth. “You said you were gonna be here last week.” His face hardens at your comment, but only for a moment. His cruel smile reappears as he kicks his pants off.

“Must’ve gotten caught up with something,” he murmurs, distant and cold. Your face twists unpleasantly at the thought. You let your eyes appraise him, making note of the small bruises and cuts that pepper his already marred skin. You knew what he did; how could you not? But your stomach still curdles at the thought of losing Dabi.

“Yea, that sounds right. I got so busy I forgot to come back,” he taunts. You pout as his words, but it just spurs him on. He slips off his boxers and steps in the shower, invading your space.

“Hmm? Does that bother you?” You steal your eyes over his shoulder, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of a reaction. But he moves forward, crowding you against the wall until there’s nowhere left to look but at him. His arms create a solid cage around you, not letting you escape.

“Why are you upset?” His breath fans over your face, and your eyes flick down to his lips. “Did you miss me?”

Something dark creeps into his voice, making you shiver. Your nod is almost discernable, but the growing smirk indicates he saw it. He’s got you right where he wants you. A finger trails down your neck, before his hand lightly grasps your throat. “Use your words.” He gives your throat a light squeeze and cocks his head to the side, waiting.

You shift under his intense, hot gaze and drag the words out, giving him what he wants.

“I missed you,” you choke out, watching as his eyes darken. He leans towards you and licks a hot stripe along the side of your face.

“Dabi!” you whine unhappily. You grimace and try to shift away from him, but his grip on your throat tightens past the point of comfort. In a panic, your hands fly to your throat and tug at his hand. He freezes, no longer tightening his hand, but not letting you go. You feel his cock twitch against you, and your pussy clenches around nothing.

He releases your throat, and you breathe heavily against him, the tension thickening in the heat from the water. In an instant, Dabi surges forward molding his lips against yours in a searing kiss. His scarred skin is pressed firmly against yours, rubbing against you in a way that sets a fire in the pit of your stomach. His hands clutch painfully at your hips, and you can feel the bruises beginning to form.

His lips are warm against yours. Almost too warm. His stapled skin is also hot, practically burning your nerves. One hand squeezes your hips, making you squirm, before trailing up to gently tease your nipple. You thread your hands through his hair, tugging, trying to yank him closer. A groan vibrates through his chest, and pride bubbles up in your blood. 

He harshly pinches your nipple, making you gasp. Dabi takes the opportunity to slip his tongue into your mouth, all while still tweaking your nipple. His tongue maps out the soft warmth of your mouth, and he rocks his hips into you, letting his cock drag against your skin.

He pulls away to catch his breath, but when he tries to find your lips again, you turn your face away, escaping from his burning mouth.

“What’s wrong?” he murmurs against you, letting his head dip down to suck marks along the side of your neck. Your fingers massage his scalp as you try to catch your breath.

“Dabi,” you breathe out, “I… I have somewhere to be.” His fiery lips still against you, and he pulls away from you. His face hardens, lips pressing into a firm line. His head cocks to the side, waiting for you to explain what could be so important to drag you away from him now. You swallow past the lump in your throat, trying not to buckle under the pressure of his attention.

“I’m going to meet my friends at-” you cut yourself off when he bucks his hips harshly into you.

“I finally make it over here, and you wanna leave,” he taunts. You narrow your eyes, feeling the maelstrom of emotions swirling in the air. They’re hot and sharp, crackling unpleasantly and intensely like lighting. You lean forward, pointing a defiant finger into his chest.

“You were supposed to be here earlier.” He rolls his eyes, grabbing your hand and jerking you forward. You stumble into his arms, and he clutches you tightly, attacking your lips with a sloppy, open-mouthed kiss. The hot water rains down on your skin, adding to the burning sensation deep inside you. His hands snake down to squeeze your ass, and you moan into the kiss.

His hands continue to squeeze and wander your available flesh, letting himself get lost in the noises you make and the way your body opens up for him. Dabi rocks his hips into you, letting his cock rub against your body. 

He traces a hand along the side of your body, letting it slide in between. You squirm as his finger swipes along your pussy lips. As if burned, you try to shift away, remembering your plans for the evening. But Dabi is intoxicating, and he pulls you down into dizzying dark depths.

“My friends...” you mumble against him, knowing you’ve already lost the battle. A disappointed noise rumbles through his chest, and he gently pinches your clit, making your hips cant against him.

“Not tonight,” he whines, pressing burning kisses into the side of your face. “Not when this pussy’s so wet for me.” He pushes one of his fingers into you, thumb rubbing harsh circles on your clit. Your hips cant against him, and you whine as he bites into the juncture of your shoulder. You rock against him, trying to push yourself towards the ledge he wants you to fall over, but Dabi laughs at your feeble attempts.

“You want more?” he murmurs into your ear. You nod, hands tugging at his hair. He pushes in a second finger and pumps them into you harshly. You moan trying to pull him back so you can kiss him. He chuckles and easily shakes himself out of your grasp. “What do you want? Use your words,” he teases. You whine, letting your hips buck against him.

At your lack of response, his thumb digs harshly into your clit, making you cry out. “I said use your words.” His tone is sharp against your ears, and you shudder. You narrow your eyes petulantly at him, and he scowls. When he realizes you’re not going to give in so easily, he rips his hand away from your needy cunt. You let out a cry of frustration at the emptiness inside you and weakly try to grab his wrist. He yanks his hand out of your grasp and turns off the water.

“Dabi, wait!” you cry out, but he’s already stepping out of the shower. He turns around to look at you, face impassable. He blinks at you slowly, waiting. The cold air plucks at your skin, goosebumps forming everywhere. Your music plays quietly in the background, and you take a deep breath, trying to steady yourself.

“I wanted you to kiss me,” you whisper. He doesn’t move, letting your words hang heavy in the air. You squirm under his intense gaze, and a cruel smile spreads on his face.

“I know.”

Dabi surges forward, cupping your face with his rough hands, and he kisses you harshly. You stumble, but he braces you with his body. His piercings and staples scrape across your skin, and he drags you forward out of the shower. His teeth clash against yours, and he spreads his palm out behind your head, holding you in place.

Your nails scrape across his chest and he groans against you. Dabi breaks away from you, leaving small nips against your neck.

“Say it again,” he whispers into your neck, voice softer than normal. You furrow your brows, head tilting to give him better access to your neck. Dabi’s normally so harsh, unbridled fury wrapped up in lean muscle and patchwork skin. But there’s something different in his voice. Not necessarily soft, but different. It’s hot and sticky and echoes through your brain.

“That I wanted you to kiss me?” you ask, confusion coloring your words. He shakes his head, hands trailing back down to your hips, squeezing the flesh there.

“That you missed me.”

Oh.

The hot, syrupiness that you heard in Dabi’s voice flows through your veins now, making your mind slow like honey. You hum in contentment, his words bouncing around your brain. You weave your hands back into his hair, holding him close to you.

“I missed you, Dabi.” His nips transition to kisses, and makes his way up your neck to your jaw.

“Again.”

“I missed you, Dabi.” He licks a hot stripe along your jaw, making you squirm. His grip tightens uncomfortably on your waist.

“Again.”

“I missed you so much, Dabi!” A bruising kiss sears itself to your lips, and you moan. You’re dragged from the bathroom to the cold comfort of your bed. He’s on you instantly, fingers buried inside your wet cunt, pushing you to the release he had denied you earlier. His touch and kisses leave you burning, reeling, but craving more.

He’s insatiable, and far too much to handle, and is most likely going to leave your burning and broken, but you don’t care. You missed him, after all.

[sickassastrology]

Who’s crushin on ya!? 😏🥰😍 This is a general pick a pile reading for the collective and your person. It may not resonate for all, so just take what sticks. Feel free to pick just one pile or take a look at them all. but please....be honest with your story. remember that timing is fluid and free will is something we all have. This could have already happened, your going through it, or will happen. Follow your heart always. -E 🌻💙

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PILE 1 ⭐️⭐️⭐️

So pile 1 your person is STUCK on you. This is someone from your past crushin on you. They just cant seem to get you out of their head-its literally making them sick. It’s like they have tried everything to distract themselves. But at the end of the day they are just worried sick, and have to speak whats on their mind. I see two 8s here so that number could be important to you or the connection. This person will be reaching out to you. this person lost you. You walked away from them and continued on with your life. And now that you left them, they are in a state of grief that you aren’t with them anymore. Ohhhhh, I see why you did....they were low vibes, huh? Had additions and didn’t want to come out of them either. Just stuck to their ball and chain. You gave A LOT to this connection. so much so that you were getting drained. I’m seeing a heart monitor, so it was like you were pumping love to this person on life support. And they were taking it. And it helped them, but they didn’t give it back because they didn’t have it. So-you had to leave. im getting that you had NOTHING left. Like even if you tried or wanted to give or have more for this person. they sucked you dry. And this hurt you. I am getting a betrayal energy from this person. They are stalking you too. If you moved on, they are looking at the new person around too. i heard the song “what we could have been“ by H.E.R. I see a guy driving around in his car at night listening to music smoking. So this person is dead in their feelings about you. They are reminiscing a lot about you. Don’t move too fast pile 1 because they are coming back. This person has done some work on themselves while they have been away too. They have been listening to spirit more. You were a divine light to them. you were placed in this persons path to help them with their addictions, help them be a better person. But nope they wanted to stay in the low vibes. like I always say, “and empress will never stay where she isn’t wanted. She will leave-BUT she will always be wanted back. She will always be needed. And this person, pile 1 needs you. i just heard I can’t live without you. So look out because they are coming around the mountain. Good luck. 😉

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PILE 2 🧿🧿🧿

Hi pile 2. Right off....this person wants to come back to you. But right now is a bad time. This person had a third party in the past and because of it, you cut them off. I don’t get the sense that this was a super long relationship. More of the beginning stages of developing into one. But this person was playing the field still. And you were having none of it. Youve been through enough. So you told them like it was, and if they try to come back again. You’ll tell them....again!! 😂 because you stood your ground, they view you as somebody different. I get that this person is used to getting over on people. But not with you so when you turned them away and cut them off. It forced them to make decision. and now their other options, I’m getting multiple people involved. They are done with them now. They have chosen you, and they are looking to come back. But boy oh boy they do have a ways to get there. This person could be at distance from you. I’m getting across water or state so they may travel to get there to you. but they have got to come correct because you are not playing! I get the sense of your not coming off of your throne-you just won’t do it. This group is no nonsense I mean honestly. 😩 your ready. You know your worth, and you are worthy of something good. You will not settle, nooooo not this time. Because youve already been through this. your heart can’t be played with anymore. This person is sad without you. They thought the other options would be better than you. Like oh “ill just go in my back pocket and choose from these”. But none were like you, so because of that....they feel STUPID. they feel so dumb, so sad that when they do come back. they won’t be able to even get a word in because you won’t hear them out. The “others“ are still coming for your person. Talk to them, be with them. But your person is just like no, I dont Want to be bothered, I want my bae back. But hey.....you may or may not be there when they decide to come. like they call you and if you answer then okay but if not, oh well. 😂 this person regrets what they've done. So dumb, so silly. To think....the other options were going to fulfill them. But they were sadly mistaken. pity boy, pity gal. 🥲 this person had options out the buttttt. They were playa playa from the Himalayas. this Person tried to play you, get over on you. And you found out. And said no not me, you WILL NOT do this to me. And they never had anyone do that to them. pile 2 I’m seeing you already know what it feels like to be not considered in a high regard. and You won’t do it again! Like if they want the others...go BYE! and now this person is feeling like they sabotaged this with you. They were living their ego. Somebody who has multiple options like that needs their ego to be fed. Like if the main person they want doesn’t work out or something happens they have backups. They can just go to someone else. Now this person feels like they aren’t enough for YOU! They now lack confidence, they are the jealous ones. They self-sabotaged. So yeah this person will come back with time, but your address may have changed by that time. *I just want to say I’m very proud of this group. A lot of lessons and growth!* best of luck! 😁

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PILE 3 🌸🌸🌸

alrighty pile 3, welcome! So this read will be more intuitive. Ironically enough, this group pulled three cards. So let’s get into it!.....*moment of silence because the energy is rather intense here*. I heard the song “baby come back” by player. I’m feeling this group has moved on from their person tbh. Like it’s just too little, too late for this person. This was somebody you walked away from. There was A LOTTT of love here. but also secrets and fears in this connection. With this person, your energy is coming up as “how could you do this to me-ME. Not in an egotistical way, but because you trusted and loved this person. And they loved you too. So when they did whatever they did to hurt or betray you, it was like how could you. 😩 I’m feeling like you weren’t even mad about it, more disappointed than anything. So after, you started just doing your own thing. Not really concerned with anything or anyone else. Just working on yourself. A reinvention. I’m seeing healthy eating or changing the color of your hair. Wearing sexy clothes (just for yourself) everything you started to do was about self love. And just when you started to move on or found someone new.....HERE THEY COME. like oh wait for me! i gotta be honest with y’all. I don’t feel like this person really cheated on you. I’m getting that maybe you thought they were doing you wrong but they weren’t. or a really bad agruement took place and something was said or done that was very distasteful and you felt betrayed by it. But I’m not getting strong cheating energy. You really thought it was something and it wasn’t and this person tried to explain and it went from there. (Downhill that is) there is so much sadness here. You really though this was going to work out and it didn’t. There has been some time that has passed here. This person didn’t know how to come back. no idea on what to say or do about the situation. But they daydream about it 24/7. They think about being intimate again and how it was like with you (if y’all were). this person wants to play something romantic. I’m seeing a dinner with candles a few drinks. Trying to take it back to the good times. But it took too long for this person. and now this person sees you with someone new And they can’t help but wonder...what if I would have gotten back in time. What if things would have worked out? This person does want to come back without a doubt! But will they? I’m not too sure, because it looks like you have someone else now. *PLOT TWIST*!!!! Pile 3 let me ask you this, do you love this new person like your old flame? I think NOT. You like this new person and everything, but your heart is with the person you broke up with. The new person is diggin you and likes you a lot. But there’s something thats just not hittin the same anymore. And your old person didn’t forget about you either. *i pulled extra cards for this group because I’m really feeling like this just may come back together. I’m getting that vibe heavy. For the outcome. I don’t see y’all coming back together ASAP because theres a decision that needs to be made and you don’t want to choose .your just kinda there. This connection right here is a divine pair. With the lovers and emperor here. But there’s still work that needs to be done by both parties and a conclusion by you. So you will be separated until then. I’m telling y’all...if you choose this person. Do not be surprised if this person gives you a ring. This person may right music or be into the arts. They may give you a gift that comes from their heart. a song. I heard melody. they could play an instrument or that was something you two had In common. The thought you of keeps this person sane while you aren’t with them. The thought of being with you again keeps them together. Like when they a bad day or something. Because you aren’t there physically, them daydreaming keeps them motivated. Pile 3, intuitively I gotta say it. I know y’all gotta make a decision and everything but this is going to work out. Idk when because time is fluid but it’s going to come back together. I’m telling y’all

now. its Going to take patience but in time it will. This connection is strong, y’all love each other too much. This person loves you. And they want to restore this! Like I said, this new person...your not fooling me! Yeah you like them, but that heart of yours didnt go anywhere. I’m going to say for this pile, your going to have to make the first moves because they feel like your done with them. They feel like there’s nothing they can do or say to get you back. WOW, you all have to let me know how this plays out because it will work out! I almost want to cry. can I get an invite to the wedding with a +1 please!?

[flutterji]

anything| renjun ff

hi! this is my first ff on tumblr so hopefully it all works out well. hope u enjoy!

desc: y/n and renjun have only been friends for about a month, but renjun was in too deep. whipped renjun, gender not specified reader!! semi drabble, high school au (like all my stories hhh), very fluffy ! barely edited, its a bit long too but whatever

word count:  2103

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y/n and jisung briskly walked the halls of their oh-so-dreadful high school, talking about, of course, absolute nonsense. ‘i mean, like, salamanders are so cute, right?’ y/n questions the tall boy, and jisung nods enthusiastically. “right! so then why would they eat each other?” jisung added. “as babies, too! it doesn make se-” cut off from their sentence, renjun snaked his arms around the both of them before yelling, “hey guys!” “renjunie!” y/n exclaims, and a wide smile paints renjun’s lips. “whats up shawty?” jisung says before making The Fuckboy Face™. “eh, not much, just absolutely dreading and stressing beyond human compacity about the calc exam tomorrow.” renjun says, pulling his arms away and shoving himself in between the two. “maybe we can study? i- honestly i wont be any help, but i have some pretty cool notes i could share?” y/n proposes. “sure, when?” renjun says, without skipping a beat. jisung looks at the two and then looks away in disgust. “you oldies.” he says, before sticking out his tongue in a teasing manner. “whatever, loser!” y/n says, emphasizing the ‘loser’. jisung pretends to cry and is all but payed attention to when renjun bothers y/n for an answer. ‘we cant study if you dont tell me when!” “well if the exam’s tomorrow then obviously we study today! what are you, an idiot?” y/n says, lightly teasing the poor boy. “right, but like, when today?” “you annoy me.” y/n responds without really responding, traveling away to meet their other friend group. “haha, y/n hates you!” jisung says. renjun then nudges jisung not-so-gently before sighing. “i dont get it. i would do anything for them and they just brush me off like im... i dont know, what am i?” he asks, confused. “an idiot. a complete idiot.”

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as soon as school ends, renjun sends y/n a text. ‘library?’ is all he says, and y/n answers quickly. ‘get here quickly pls,,, i dont wanna waste time” y/n sends back shortly after. renjun walks to their schools library, and sees his study mate. “hey jun, hurry up before i start growing grey hairs.” y/n whisper yells from one of the tables. he had taken longer than he wanted to, so he rushed to the table and scurried to get out his notebook and a pencil. ‘right, so, show me your notes.” y/n says, half distracted by the drawing they were creating in the corner of a scrap piece of paper. renjun opens his note book, revealing his subpar notes. “dude, what-- how much time do you spend actually taking notes?” y/n asks before revealing their organized notes that definitely weren’t the best, but better than renjun’s. “i look out the window more than i pay attention, ha...” renjun admits with a sheepish smile. “sure, just read my notes and copy whatever you need.” y/n says nonchalantly. “thank you so much, you’re a life saver, y/n!” renjun exclaims. “of course i am, i’m me.” y/n says unexpectedly, before ‘posing’ and rolling their eyes.

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after some time had passed, renjun had gotten distracted. “junie, can i tell you something?” y/n asked, looking at renjun’s renovated notes. “sure, whats up?” renjun responds while flipping his pencil between his fingers. “there’s this girl that likes me, but i don’t like her back. it’s kinda so awkward, but i don’t want it to be. ugh, its so frustrating!” y/n whines as they drum their fingers against the table. “oh? who is it? can i know?” renjun immediately asks. “she told me tot to tell anyone. so i’m kinda already not listening, but as long as i don’t tell you her name that should be fine, right?” renjun whines and begins asking more questions. “is she nice? do i know her? when-” “shut up.” y/n cuts him off and runs their temples. “she’s... its not like she’s not nice, and you don’t know her, okay? ugh, i shouldn’t have even tried telling you about my love life.” y/n grumbles. “love life?” renjun asks. “maybe you could repay me by telling me something.” y/n offers, a smirk growing on their face. renjun tries hard not to blush and looks away quickly. “there’s, uh, nothing to talk about, ha.” he explains half heartedly. “sure there is! maybe not recent, but tell me something at least a little interesting.” y/n persuades. “uh, well, last year i made friends with this... person, and i liked them. they, uh, they moved away. yea.” renjun cant help but blush as he struggles to find literally anything else to do. “yea, sure.” y/n takes note of his blush and can’t help but wonder if he’s lying. 

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y/n begins packing up and renjun looks at them in confusion. “you have to go?” he asks, trying to hide his disappointment. “yea, im sorry. you got everything you needed, right?” y/n responds. y/n has a knack for ignoring renjun, the way he blushes, the way he often looks at them with wide eyes, the way he looks around aimlessly when he thinks, the way he throws his head back when he laughs, the way he bends his knees when he screams into the air when he’s frustrated or flustered, and... maybe they didn’t ignore renjun. maybe they didnt ignore him at all. “yea, thank you so much!” and he smiles the cutest smile and starts packing up his things as well. “you have a ride home? i’m taking the bus.” y/n asks. “i’m taking the bus too! maybe we should get a snack for the ride?” “YES.” y/n answers right away. renjun laughs and throws back his head, just like how y/n was just thinking about. a small smile creeps up y/n’s face and a boldness takes over. “you’re adorable, you know that?” y/n asks, swinging their backpack over their shoulder. renjun blushes, and hard. his heart races and he struggles to come up with a reply as his hand thoughtlessly covers his smile. “adorable, ha.” he says quietly. y/n internally yells and waits for him. “yea. so what type of snack do you want?”

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on the bus with chip bags on their laps, the silence is almost comforting, right before it’s not. the bus stops to let in more people, and renjun looks at y/n. y/n pops more chips in their mouth before looking back, and renjun swiftly looks away. they’re sitting next to each other, and renjun has never been that close to y/n. he starts noticing their more delicate features up close and feels his chest tightening. after y/n swallows the chips, they look at renjun’s hand, a single ring on his pointer finger. mindlessly, they pick it up to examine the ring. renjun’s heart starts beating louder at the contact, and he looks out the window without knowing what else to do. “pretty ring.” y/n says. “thank you, chenle gave it to me.” he says, smiling shyly. “so you’re married?” y/n says, a single brow raised. renjun takes back his hand and and looks at his ring. “its not like that! besides, i dont like him.” he says. “do you like someone else then?” “maybe.” renjun mutters so quietly that he can barely hear himself. “HA! I KNEW IT!”  y/n celebrates their small victory and renjun looks back towards the window with a stupid smile on his face and a blush on his cheeks.

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once renjun reaches his stop, he stands up. “this you?” y/n asks. “yea, bye!” he says, almost sadly walking in front of y/n to get out of the aisle. “no, not bye, lemme walk with you the rest of the way.” y/n says and gets up, walking out and away from the bus shortly after. renjun smiles to himself and walks towards his street, leading the way. “so... who is it?” y/n asks. renjun blushes and covers his face. “i can’t tell you that!” he says. “why not? huh? i’ll tell you mine.” y/n says. “yoU HAVE A CRUSH?” renjun practically screams. “yea, it’s not a big deal.” y/n says, right before pulling two lollipops out of their pocket and handing one to renjun. “fine, but, please don’t hate me.” renjun pleads, putting the wrapper into his pocket. “i promise i wont hate you. who is it?” “well, we only started being friends recently, but they’re just so.. i don’t know. and i’ve told jisung this, but i would do anything for them.” he says, trying hard not to stutter and even harder to not get a heart attack. y/n puts the lollipop in their mouth, and renjun follows. “anything?” y/n asks playfully. “yea, pretty much. i don’t even know why i like them so much, they act like... i don’t know, they kind of ignore me.” y/n secretly wondered what type of human would be able to ignore someone as nice and as attractive as renjun. “ignore you? it’s hard to do that with how whiny you are.” y/n laughs and renjun whines. “see, i told you!” y/n says and smiles around their lollipop. “anyways, do i know them?” y/n asks shortly after. “yea, kinda... hah, all of a sudden i dont really wanna talk about it anymore, so, bye?” renjun forces his hands into his pockets. was he really ready to confess? “fine, i’ll tell you about mine then. he’s really charming in his own way, and i just realized that i liked him recently. we also haven’t been friends for long, ha. i don’t know why, there’s just something about him, his cute little habits are so endearing to me. ew, i sound gross.” y/n pretends to vomit, and renjun sighs lowly. “you really do like him, huh?” he asks, defeated. “yea, i guess i really do.”  y/n smiles to themselves and nudges renjun.

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renjun kicks at a rock before stopping in front of a house. “well, this is my house, so...” “right.” y/n nods and presses their lips together. “hey, could you do me a favor?” y/n asks, right before renjun goes to walk up to the door. “sure, anything you want?” “anything?” y/n asks with a smile on their face. renjun lightly blushes, before saying quietly, “yea, anything.” he sends a small smile and y/n can’t help but walk closer to the boy. renjun’s heart starts pounding inside his chest. did he just confess?   y/n reaches out to him and gives him a hug. renjun frantically tries placing his hands on y/n’s back multiple times before finally resting them in one spot, placing his head in the crook of their neck. to him, it felt like they fit together perfectly. a giant smile paints his lips and y/n starts retracting their arms. ‘it’s you, renjun.” y/n faulters with their words. renjun’s eyes go wide and his lips part to let in air. he felt like he couldn’t breathe. “me. i am? it’s… what? he says, absolutely speechless. “you’re the guy i was talking about earlier. not that it matters.” y/n shrugs, trying to hide the fact that their heart was absolutely racing. “it does, uh, to me, because, you’re the person i was talking about earlier too, so…” he hides his face with his hand and looks away. ‘you think i ignore you?’ y/n says, surprised. ‘uh, a little bit…” he admits, shyly. he felt like he was going to explode, he was so flustered. “sorry, i’ll try to pay more attention to you?” y/n offers, paired with a crooked smile. renjun bends his knees and screams into the air, making y/n smile and laugh shortly after. “sorry, and, yea, that would be nice.” y/n hesitates before stepping forward and planting a quick kiss on renjun’s cheek, sending the poor love-struck boy’s heart to heaven and hell at the same time. a wide goofy smile is shared between the both of them. “ill text you?” y/n offers, hands trying to find a place to stop before finally landing in their pockets. “yes, great! i mean, uh, cool. very cool.” renjuns fails to hide his excitement as he practically floats on air and lets out a sigh, shooting y/n a thumbs up. “very cool, yes.” y/n laughs and finally leaves the boy to go inside, and he automatically starts jumping in a circle and clapping out of happiness.

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the end! 

[zuffer-weird-girl]

It's been a long time since I didn't write anything 'original' of mine, so just have this

Suffering due to the silence

Usually he admired the silence.

It was just so peaceful whenever no one was yelling, making a fuss over something... it was perfect. He could work at peace, read a good book, anything really. When the quarters of Shie Hassaikai were avoided of any sound, it could be uncomfortable to many, but for him it was heaven on earth.

Although... he learned recently that not always the silence was pleasing... and he got that lesson in the worst way possible.

~

"There is no way you need to raise your voice like that." He hissed while you still continue glaring at him with arms crossed "You're an animal now to keep howling like that?"

"Howling? Chisaki. Is that hard to understand that not only you gets worried in here?! You just go into a meeting, nearly almost dies and expect me to not be like this?!"

"You're being irrational." He sighed in annoyance, hand on his temple before he pointed at you while opening hsi eyes "You aren't delusional to think that a job on the mafia is all peace and happiness. Not even commenting on my quirk that can easily get rid of anyone or any injury in general."

"So you prefer to get hurt endless times instead of being careful with your own damn mouth?!" His eyes darkened as his voice lowered as a warning.

"Care to explain what is that suppose to mean?"

"I mean that you don't measure your words neither care about your own state!"

"Stop. Yelling." He hissed but you only ignored the venom on his voice.

"You don't give a shit about me, your partner, getting worried that well, I dunno, just got shot and simply dismissed as nothing?! I know your quirk Chisaki, but that doesn't mean you can just threw insults at other gangs or leagues and just get attached, and even getting the fuck up excuse that they threw the firts move!"

He clenched one side of his head as he growled the kore you speak, why can't you just stop?! He doesn't need you to fuss over something that is clearly not to be even concerned about it.

"SHUT YOUR DAMN MOUTH FOR ONCE!" he, before he could even process, let out a shout, shocking you to the point if even making you jump.

He breathed in and out, before returning to his composture, the most ugly and cold glare on his eyes to you.

"Whinning and complaining wont lead us to anywhere. And clearly your "worry" isn't just going to help this. So stop with this nonsense for once." He said nonchantly but evidently fed up with all of this... although he noticed the moment a tear fell from your eyes he had gone too far.

He went to speak again before you simply sniffled and looked up at him with the same cold and distant look he gave to you a few minutes ago.

"If it's that what you want. Fine by me... Overhaul." He felt shivers of disgust running his spine at hearing his villain name from your mouth as you walked away with not much words and closed the door of his voice.

~

That was the last thing he heard from you for at least now two days and a half...

He had heard of those 'silent treatment' before. Precepts whose got someone on their lifes often spoke about their partners and how they had "fuck up" to this point. Whenver he heard those, he couldn't understand neither would care to try to, in his head, silence was a blessing.

But he thought the exact same opposite when it comes to having a partner as well... he thought it was unnecessary, a complete waste of time and that teh feeling of 'love' was purely illusion... the moment he layed his eyes on you, he found out those things were real.

The disgusting butterflies on the stomach, the anxiety and craving to see them again, the utter worry and pain whenver you saw they crying or possibly being on danger... it was all true.

This silent treatment, was indeed a pain.

He at first thought that on the first day you would stop with this childish thing and return back to normal... but you didn't. The more the tickling of the clock on his way ticked on his ears, the more he bounced his knee in irritation... another second passed by without you on his presence.

He didn't received any words of you. At all. Not even a glimpse of a eye. And this was slowly torturing him...

He was becoming so desperate at this point that he even tried to catch your attention by calling you or requesting that a precept called you into his office. All of this ended in, you walking past him more quickly and one nervous as hell precept knocking on his door, saying that you had things to do at the moment.

Things were getting bad and darker for the young leader of the Shie Hassaikai. Everyone on there knew that you were the only one whose could calm down the best without getting killed by him... you were the only one who could keep Chisaki Kai calm and... happy to say the least.

You were his joy and light on his dark life... the more he tried to denied, the more he fell for those sweet and innocent eyes and gentle as a touch of a angel personality...

Now? He couldn't even get a good morning or a simple greeting.

He walked into his room and didn't find you, which was odd considering that it was night time already... he had noticed that you waited to get out of the bed only when he left and that you slept on some free room or went to bed way earlier than usual.

He sighed and prepared his heart and chest, which was already feeling tight and cold as ice, to find you reading on the living room... as usual, not even sparing a glance at him.

"Is late. You should go to bed." He commented nonchantly while you flipped one page from your book.

He wasn't blind, he could see teh red in your eyes and the hints if dried tears on your cheeks... for how exactly long you had cried because of him...?

"... is.. a interesting choice." He averted his eyes a bit "But even if it's a catching story, you need rest as well."

Only a nod of your head. It was all he got so far.

He sighed and got out of the room, entering his office and closing the door for just a bit only to open the slightest to catch a glimpse that you had gone to the bedroom shortly after he closed his office.

He had to admit. You were persistent.

And he? Was too prideful to say those words his inner being was almost begging for him to do.

Say that you're sorry dammit. Push your pride aside for once... you love (Y/n), you fucked up. Why cant you just say it?

... he didn't know.

~

Now, it was four days since he had last heard your voice or even felt a brush of your fingers... amd he could admit that he was just miserable.

How could he get so... dependent, in a certain way, of you?

He even himself stopped talking, the less he already did, and even let some slips of precept pass since it didn't matter to him at that time... he only wanted for you to at least look at him. Look at him with love again in your eyes.

One time Rappa was speaking to Tengai and let it slip some shit about Kai just when he was passing by... and the man himself got surprised when Chisaki only passed by without much of a word.

Both man had their eyes wide open and quickly got even more shocked when their boss quickened his steps just a bit to try to speak to you again.

He heard what Rappa said clearly as day. But he cared more about feeling or hearing his love again then some thug that little respected him.

He was... numb.

Although the breaking point reached when he caught a conversation of you and Chrono. Hearing your voice again did atrocities with his heart and head, and he swore he let out a breath he didn't even knew he was holding when he got the privilege to listen such a melodious sound again.

"Come on (Y/n), we're almost begging here.." Chrono spoke while you picked your mug and poured your drink on it.

"Seing the boss in this state is worse and way too fucking uncomfortable then seing him angry. And I fucking meant it! JUSt TalK WitH HiM LiTtlE PuNk-!" Mimic shouted while you sighed and took a sit on the kitchen.

"... you two really dont think I want to..?" You spoke, one of the saddest tone of voices he ever heard coming from you.

"Then why the fuck?" Kurono spoke, more confused then ever.

"I just think he really doesn't care too much sometimes. And whenever I spoke up my worries he just brushes off like it's just annoying or bothering him... it sounds like his worries are rational and worth it while mine is just... whimpering."

He sighed, having to admit mentally that you weren't wrong in the slightest...

"Besides... the way he shouted, and what he said" you tightened your grip on your mug as your eyes burned "I-I... can't just forget neither let it slide..."

He walked away from that place, opting to not hear anything about your sadness longer... While his commurates still try it to change your mind.

That was it... his pride and arrogance that go to hell.

~

You went to enter your room, knowing that Chisaki was probably still on his office working, feeling more tired and sad than ever as the days passed.

How long would you be able to atture this torture (Y/n)...?

You pushed the door and froze when you saw the back of your lover, taking off his tie before he looked at you, same tired and devoid of happines expression of yours.

You lowered your head and turned on your back to him, preparing to leave before you widen your eyes a bit when you saw the wall desconstricting and constructing another part right on the middle of the door... preventing you to get out of the room.

Damn his quirk...

You stayed immobile while your heart pumped hard against your chest while your ears catched the sound of his foot steps coming closer to you.

You didn't move, only gulped the thick air stuck on your throat when the sounds stopped, meaning that he was close enough to you.

"... I am not used to this." His voice sounded so raspy yet rough that send shivers through your spine.

You gasped a bit when you felt his hands and arms wrapping around your midsection to bring you close to his chest... warm breath hitching the back of your neck and ear, making your heart bump like crazy.

"I do understand that you worry about me just as much as I do... but.." he sighed shakily while hugging you closer to him, breathing in your pure and clean scent was so calming yet let him nervous someway... "I am not used to it."

You stood still, not even breathing almost as you let him talk...

"I am not used to such a kind and gentle soul care for me... even spare a single sign of... love." He closed his eyes in a sigh "I learned from a very young age that you can't just trust someone... because normally they would dissapoint or stab you on the back... Pops was a exception since the old man took me in... but I feel in need to repay him and you know it (Y/n)... for me, someone can't just do such a kind action without wanting something in return, and even if him or you say that is not necessary I just can't help it..."

You furrowed your eyebrows together but resisted to touch the arm beneath you.

"I never got such a good person on my life until he took me in... or when I met you..." he sighed, tightening his eyes at feeling the burning on them forming "I know you worry, but for me... it just doesn't matter what happens with me, if I got my goal, then is fine... but I never stopped to think that you were hurting because of my actions and consequences and.... I am so sorry for that..."

You widen your eyes at the last sentence as tears escaped from your eyes... for Chisaki to apologize, without being completly sarcastic, it took a lot...

"I am sorry... for not taking your opinion and worry. I worry just as much about you yet due to my arrogance I couldn't see your own... I'm sorry (Y/n), a millions times sorry, a thousand times sorry but..." he tighten his grip around you as he buried his face in your neck.

"...Will you talk to me already..?"

You furrowed your eyebrows but smile at the same time before sighing, using your hand to brush the slightest his skin a bit.

He felt joilts of eletrevity of feeling your touch on him again, sighing a bit in relief but still wouldn't let go of you.

"... for you to give one apology it takes a lot... imagine a thousand." You sighed and he swore that at that moment a tear or two escaped his eyes as he hugged you tighter as a form of gratitude.

He let go a bit just to pass his arm around your the back of your knees to lift you up in bridal style as he settled on the bed with you on his arms... laying his head on a angle that you couldn't exactly see his face properly.

When he felt your fingers brushing his dark brow looks he knew he wasn't at least that much fucked... but he still holded you close to him, afraid of you regretting your decision.

He sighed through his nose as he nuzzled himself onto your neck, relishing on the calm and peace that only you aas able to give to him.

"Never do this again." He muttered in your neck, the sound appearing muffled by his black mask and your skin "I felt like I was losing myself."

Your giggles were just music to his ears as he allowed himself to smile and close his eyes in bliss, enjoying the feeling of your lips on his temple.

"I didn't thought that four days were enough to leave you like this... I'm sorry." You giggled at the vibrations that were caused by his low groan on your neck.

"You're the reason of my happiness. If you wanted to make me suffer then you were suceful... "

He brough you closer as your sweet voice and gentle touches lulled his tired soul to a peaceful sleep.

[capan-devereaux]

SHRAN X READER PART 2

It felt as though an eternity had separated you from him and you were sick of only written communication so in your last letter you proposed an idea. While it had started innocently enough talking about how in the future humans and andorians might some day serve on ships together it planted the thought in your mind. After mulling over your options and your loneliness in missing Shran you came out with a great idea. Indeed it was the only viable, reasonable solution you could come to, you could transfer to  his ship and start over in the Andorian Imperial Gaurd.

Knowing something like this would be difficult you made it a point to talk to your closest friend on the ship Dr. Phlox. While your ... 'involvement' with Shran was somewhat common knowledge you didn't talk about it much with others often as when you did you could feel the judgment radiating off of them. Phlox never made you feel uncomfortable about anything much less your relationship with Shran. While Hoshi helped pass along your messages as the communications officer and was supportive you didn't see her much and you were nowhere near as close with her as you were Phlox. So as you talked with Phlox   you asked for advice after telling him what you had proposed to Shran, and he agreed that you should because would make you much happier than you would ever be if you continued to serve on Enterprise. He did make you promise that you would keep good contact with him if your plan was successful. It felt good to have your close friends support in the matter.

Now by some stroke of luck God had smiled on you as Shran had brought this idea, that a human could work on an Andorian ship (and not be a security risk), to his superiors somehow convincing them that this would help relations between your peoples and could be a great advantage. So now all you had to do was convince your own government. Knowing your Captain's opinion carried weight with Star Fleet and if he was convinced then it was practically a sure thing.

So armed with the written approval of the Andorian Gaurd, an actual formal request from Shran, and the emotional support of your good friend (ready to call on him if you needed aid with convincing Captain Archer) you waited until your opportunity came along and you saw it at lunch. You managed to snag him while he was picking up his lunch.

"Ensign" he acknowledged you as you approached him.

"Sir, would you allow me to take some of your time," you were starting to feel a bit nervous but swallowed the greasy feeling back down, "there's something I want ask you."

You felt relief at both being able to get the words out with out letting on how nervous you were (because you know confidence would be key in this conversation) and at his response.

"As long as you don't mind if we sit while we talk. I don't want to eat on my feet." His teasing tone let you know he was in a good mood. This was a good sign.

After quickly finding a table you continued.

"Well," you fumbled with the data padd, "I was wondering if you would allow me to transfer"

"Why?" he asked worried about what could make you feel the need to transfer not realizing that he had cut you off.

"I would like to transfer to the Kumari, Sir."

You were glad that you had managed to sit away from people enough that no one heard what you said. A slight fear of how you would be treated by your coworkers if you failed to convince Archer and had to stay.

"An Andorian ship, Commander Shrans ship", his statement felt awkward and became more uncomfortable for him as he continued in a slightly quieter tone, "Then this is about your ... 'involvement' with Commander Shran then"

"Yes sir", you looked down as you said it feeling the same judgment from your captain that you received from the rest of the crew.

You faltered if only for a moment letting weakness take over before steeling your resolve. You knew that you had to do this and remembered that Phlox would help if you needed it. Looking back up you met his eye and handed him the datapadd.

"Shran has already taken this to his superiors and they thought that having a human on board an Andorian ship may help strengthen relations between our peoples. Of course Shran suggested me once he had the chance."

You looked into his eyes again and saw something that looked an awful lot like understanding mixed with worry. The feeling of being judged eased slightly.

"I see, there are only two problems I can think of with this, How the Vulcan High Command will react and how you would fit in on the ship, would you be treated as an equal."

"Sir, its already been decided that if I do transfer I would be an ensign there and I'm willing to bet that I'd feel more comfortable on Shrans ship than I do here at the moment"

Just as it was no secret that you were with Shran it was also no secret that many crewmembers were less than happy about it. Archer knew that you had to ignore their judgment and gossip every day, not that there was much you could do to stop that sort of thing.

"We still have to think about how Vulcan High Command will react"

"Honestly Sir, I'm not sure how to handle that but I'm sure that they would eventually get over it. Not to mention the vulcans aren't our only allies we should be able to strengthen our ties other species without being reprimanded. And I know I'm out of line with all this so I'll just finish please support this when the andorians bring this to Starfleet. Your opinion carries weight and it would mean more to me than you could ever know and I know Shran would consider this a huge favor. "

He cut you off before you could continue rambling, "You have my support"

After a pause, "Thank you so much sir, I'll leave you to your lunch now" You were worried that he may change his mind if you bothered him further.

-----

As you had guessed after Captain Archer gave his support you were able to transfer to the Kumari. You only had to finish up some documents and you did so in the infirmary so you could talk with Phlox as you did. When you looked up from your last document you paused before saying,

"I'm going to miss you, I can't thank you enough for helping me."

"Nonsense, what are friends for. "

You wrapped your arms around him in a hug briefly before letting him go.

"You have to write back as frequently as you can, I cant loose contact with such a great friend"

Of course he agreed. And you smiled again at your friend anc at the thought you'll be able to see you lover as much as possible soon.

----

You open your eyes to see the now 'very familiar' cool tones of Shrans quarters and register the cold of the room only a moment before registering the face pressed into the back of your neck and smiled. Finally able to see Shran as often as you want.

-----

while it took some time you won the respect of your crew mates by showing how hard working you were, and your competence and eagerness to learn and work more efficiently with them. There was far less judgment here than on Enterprise and you had even made a few friends in the few months that you'd been here. Which of course you had to tell Phlox about, he had to know how much more comfortable you were here. Shran was more than happy to let you write so frequently to your friend,  especially after you explained how Phlox had helped you gather your nerves to set everything in motion on your end.

-----------

Thank you guys for being so patient with me I hope you enjoy it as much as th eg first part. it still feels a little incomplete but I might expand on this more later

[archived-brokentoys]

@folcire​ / giving me dat good rant:

Heres the tea; first up theres too much to say in notes but I was there from the begining of G0tham + the g0tham fandom to the end & I went through all the horrid horrid discorse and the idiotic behaviours of fans & the writers nonsense on their offical twitter account as well. So heres the bomb shell: Ed was not a well liked character in G0tham until he struck up a relationship with Oswald.  After that his populairty inceased a little directly along with the EdxOswald ship, however, Eds populairty didn't peek until he legit had a homophobic melt down toward Oswald. Theres a lot of debate about this but the truth no one likes to talk about is that the Writers and his actor INSISTED that Ed absloutely WAS NOT GAY which made his behaviours toward Oswald incredibly awful given if he was not gay or bi ("Ed is in no way queer" was the actors actual words on the subject ) because suddenly the fandom couldn't actually excuse Ed's behaviour by claiming it was simply "internalized homophobia", bc Ed being not gay/bi made it just Homophobia TM. However the "Nygm0bblep0tters" held onto this idea of Ed having "internalised homophobia" to the bitter end & the writers gleefully. Queer baited & were just all around aweful until the end too! So back to the point, Ed got mad popular when he went full homophobe & a lot of very homophobic fans considered him a hero 'saving' them from the 'gay cancer / gay agender' while idiotic slash shippers woobied him as that poor babu with interalised homophobia. The season 3 plot was HORRIFIC and destoryed the show. There as never & probably never will be anything more reildicious & homophobic on screen then that season long shit show. No, not even supernatrual gets close. I legit cant even rewatch season 3 bc it is HORRENDOUS. anyway. deep breath. There u go.

God. GOD. Like... I KNEW there was a reason the show gave me major bad vibes. For the most part, it was the writing which felt a little ableist to me. But golly! Let’s mark down ableism AND homophobia. I didn’t actually know this? Because as said, I’ve no actual context to the scenes that I saw. I just knew Ed rejected him and then Os killed his girlfriend and then Ed shot him. Yay, what a wonderful ship! Am I right? Which I was confused why so many people shipped them before... but now... NOW I’M ULTRA CONFUSED. Don’t get me wrong at all. I don’t mind the Os and Ed ship! Hell, if an Os manages to whoo my Ed, I’d ship it! But in the context of G0tham verse? It was always so... Weird to me. Like if they were treated as a problematic ship, I wouldn’t mind. But people would just ship them as if they’re very in love and as if it’s healthy and as if it’s cute. When like. They’ve done such horrible stuff to each other and from the sound of it NOW, it’s just awful. 

Anyways! Now you’ve REALLY turned me off the show! Like GOSH. I can’t even find the words to say?? Other than. I’m just not really surprised. Like I SOUND surprised, but I know I shouldn’t be. It doesn’t surprise me coming from a show like this.

But I guess I wanted to say one thing is that I’ve noticed that there are legit fans who seemingly love him outside the ship. Because I saw a Reddit thread on discussing which Ed is better, Ark@m verse or G0tham verse... in which damned near everyone said G0tham verse and I just... couldn’t believe it. I guess because Ark is what made me REALLY love Ed’s character, it’s what really introduced me to his character, and it had a lot of cool things about his character which I take a lot of inspiration for my own portrayal. People talked about how much better he was in G0tham. But then again... those people probably never really bothered listening to the patient files or doing most of the riddles, because lots of them... criticized him for things that were already explained in the game. (For example; there were a couple of people saying his hatred for Bat makes no sense. Even tho... the series literally gives SEVERAL REASONS as to why he hates Bat so much and why it’s personal. And many others thinks he’s written to be intentionally stupid/pretending to be smart in it, which... I also don’t think, but I can somewhat understand why others WOULD think that.) OKAY, I’m really getting off-topic but. Even on YouTube when I saw history about Ed’s character, everyone in the comments were like “G0THAM DID ED THE MOST JUSTICE!! I NEVER LIKED HIM UNTIL THAT SHOW!!” Which again, is funny... because after everything I heard? And now after what you told me, I just... do not like the sound of Ed’s characterization in G0tham.

P.S. I hope you don’t mind that I put numbers in your reply, I just don’t want this to pop up in the tags!

ANYWAYS x2, Edward is mentally ill, suffers from OCD, and he’s also bisexual. I declare this.