#i can't scream aloud because it's 2 am

[bucky-boychik-barnes]

I think one of the hosts of This Week in Fandom History mentioned me as a Tumblr person without saying my name and I am screaming on the inside???

[he-is-lightning-in-a-bottle]

Unknown - Ep 11 - That Scene

The opening scene of episode 11 landed differently for me than it did for others. I was going to just keep it to myself since I have a minority opinion, but when I rewatched it last night I fell even more in love with it!

The structure!! It's so good! Let me explain.

At the bottom of the stairs, Qian hesitates. He still hasn't made up his mind.

Yuan says "Do you still not get it?" He knows what Qian is feeling, even if Qian hasn't figured it out yet. So he says what he wants very clearly.

Yuan asks for permission to do 4 things:

1. Be more than just Qian's brother.

2. Be who Qian relies on when he's down.

3. Be someone Qian can talk to about anything.

4. Be with Qian for the rest of his life.

Before Qian answers, he revisits 4 sets of memories, each set answering one of Yuan's questions with a resounding YES.

After each affirmative answer, it cuts back to the sex scene to communicate that THIS is the culmination of all those yesses.

In other words, there are 4 direct questions and 4 groups of memories that hold the answers to those questions, 4 times those memories scream the answer is YES, and 4 cuts to a bit of sex.

Let's look at the groups of memories.

1. He thinks back to Yuan's words in ep 9. Does he not want Yuan? Or does he not DARE to want Yuan? And he remembers all the times he felt desire for Yuan, but suppressed it. Can he be more than just Yuan's brother? Yes.

2. He thinks back to Yuan consistently being someone Qian can rely on, all through his childhood until now. "If the world falls down, we'll hold it up together." "You won't be alone." "I like being around you." Yuan genuinely likes being around Qian and has never wanted to leave him. He's shown his commitment to Qian time and time again. Can Qian rely on Yuan when he's down? Yes.

3. He remembers how long and hard Yuan suffered while enduring one-sided love, and that Yuan chose to suffer in quiet for years rather than confess to Qian about it. But Qian knew Yuan was suffering that whole time and hated it. It broke Qian's heart to see how hard it was for Yuan. If he did likewise and didn't talk about things, he'd also break the heart of the person who loves him because of his silence. Yuan laid himself bare and told Qian everything. Can Qian reciprocate and tell Yuan about everything in his life, even the hard things? Yes.

4. He thinks about how Yuan has ALREADY built his entire life around Qian. "I can sum up my life in two words: Wei Qian." Memories of Yuan come like a flood, rapidly gaining momentum. Yuan has already been with Qian for most of his life, and will NOT STOP. Qian can't imagine a life without Yuan. So can Yuan be with Qian for the rest of his life? Yes.

Qian nods and says his answer aloud: You can. And then they kiss.

The sex is not the point. It's the culmination. It's all the yesses stacked on top each other until they break the last of Qian's walls. By cutting the sex so it only exists between each resounding YES, they've made it less about the action of it and more about Qian realizing that YES, they're ALREADY in love and unalterably committed to each other. Why not give in to his physical desires when the rest is so clear?

Others watched this and saw a sex scene interrupted by cumbersome flashbacks. I watched this and saw a dramatic feelings realization interrupted by snippets of quite lovely sex that drove those feelings home.

A final note: It's probably because I'm demisexual, but I am frequently unmoved by sex scenes, especially when they do not advance the plot or the character development. This onscreen scene moved me. It hit the right emotional note. It was focused primarily on Qian's pov (his face is the one the camera is focusing on). And it was artfully done, instead of merely being titillating.

I'm tagging a few people who I recall talking about this in their posts, but it's been a couple of weeks so forgive me if I leave someone out or misremember. @absolutebl @lurkingshan @bengiyo @wen-kexing-apologist @wanderlust-in-my-soul @twig-tea

[wife-of-all-dilfs]

listen, this isn’t a request (unless you want it to be, i don’t know if your requests are open rn but i would literally die if my 1 am horny thoughts about finnick was turned into a fic) but ANYWAYS have some thots.

i feel like finnick in TMJ2 isn’t talked about enough— probably because.. well.. you know.. but THE LACK OF FICS THERE ARE OF HIM IN THAT TACTICAL GEAR IS SAD. Like you cannot tell me that a man who can make tactical gear look hot as fuck doesn’t get railed by reader. (maybe it’s just a personal preference idk but it needs to be talked about more)

BUT HIS THIGHS IN THEM THOUGH AND THE THIGH HOLSTER AND EVERYTHING ABOUT IT JUST MAKES ME WANNA SCREAM AND HIS FLOOFY HAIR >>>

but like seriously though like imagine he isn’t even aware of the effect he has and reader just wants to just fuck him so bad (or even ride his thigh) because they didn’t think finnick could look any more attractive but like there’s no where to go with the task force so it’s like a whole “gotta stay quiet” situation (🤭) like maybe it’s happening while everyone’s asleep

Like I know they’re in the middle of a war and all but war times won’t stop the whore times is all im saying

NO COZ I AGREE, MOCKINGJAY PART 2 FINNICK IS NOT TALKED ABT ENOUGH!!!! him in all black does things to me that I can't even speak aloud. I've been thinking the exact same thing though, no one writes him in the tactical gear enough and there's so much fic potential for it???

there's this one deleted scene where they are in the capitol inside someone's home after the black tar-thing scene and—oh my god. lemme show y'all, it's in my special finnick folder on tiktok, he looks fking scrumptious.

HELLO??? i know he's only in it for like five seconds but HE LOOKS SO GOOD???

i've lowkey thought about writing mjp2 finnick for sooo long but I always get stuck writing a different fic. I've got so many ideas though, it's crazy so I'm definitely adding this request to my 'must write' list AHHHHHHHHH

[sports-on-sundays]

something angsty with marc where reader “runs away” after they argue too much about everything

run away / Marc Guiu / PART 1

Summary: Marc x girlfriend!reader - Marc and his girlfriend have another argument, and she can't keep it together any longer. Angst.

Warnings: no happy ending, lots of censored cursing lol, mention of mental illness, mention of underage drinking, drinking, a creep checking out/trying to get with reader and touching her (nothing super serious at all, but if someone is sensitive to that- just be aware)

Requested?: Yes, and thank you.

Author's Note: I didn't actually include much of the arguing in it, and mostly just focused on the reader breaking, getting upset, etc. about it, so here it's not exactly specified what the argument was about, but there are hints that they've been having arguments frequently before this. Link to part 2

"Okay," you suddenly stand up, your voice wavering. You shove past Marc, bumping your shoulder into his roughly. "I'm... I need to go..."

"So you're just going to f*cking walk out now?" Marc yells. "We're not done!"

"You just want to be right!" you snap, fighting off tears. "I'm sick of arguing with you, I'm sick of seeing you, and I need to go..."

"So you're just going to f*cking run away from your problems? Our problems? Is that the f*cking way you think is best to deal with it?" Marc yells, which rattles your bones.

A tear falls down your face as you reach the door. "Marc... I... I need... to... get away... for now..." Your voice is faltering so much, and you can barely breathe.

You feel his hand clasp your shoulder tightly from behind, which makes you flinch a little. "You need to-" he starts.

"No!" you suddenly scream, turning around to do it right in his face. "I know what I need to do, and that is to get away from you right now, because I'm scared! And there's nothing else we can work out right now when you're so mad at me and I'm so nervous! So f*cking let me run away from you and your f*cking screaming and yelling!" You stifle a sob, stepping away from him.

He's about to speak, and for a moment, there's some sympathy on his face, but you don't give him time to see if that glimmer of a look was going to turn into anything, because in that instance, you turn on your heel, open the door, slam it behind you, and run.

You get in a cab and cry, "Take me f*cking wherever you can that's away from here."

"Uh..." the driver says, unsure.

You sigh, letting out a shaky breath, before murmuring the name of a club on the other end of the city. In a section of the city that's not so pretty.

The kind of place no one, especially Marc, would even think to check for you, if they were looking for you.

The cabbie nods and gets driving.

The whole ride, you're holding back your sobs, not wanting to make this poor driver feel even more uncomfortable than he probably already is. You stare out the window as lights in the night zoom past you, starting to feel a little dizzy, but you try to ignore it.

Things were going so good.

He was so sweet. It's like we always agreed.

And then it's like something just changed. Was it in me? Or is it his fault?

Or are both of us in the wrong?

Why do we have to argue all the time now? Is it just that the honeymoon stage is over, and we see how we really feel about each other, or is there something more?

Maybe he's just getting tired of me.

You gulp back more tears as the cab driver pulls up to the curb. You pay for the ride and slip out, entering the club, your whole body shaking slightly.

You sit down heavily on a bar stool at the counter and lean your head in your hands.

I shouldn't be here. Is Marc right? Am I just running away from my problems?

But I was starting to feel nervous. Actually, genuinely scared. Panicked.

Of him.

Am I just that mentally unstable, or was he being too harsh with me?

You don't know.

You cry a little and say aloud, "Why does everything have to be so blurry and confusing and unclear? I haven't even had a f*cking drink yet."

"Would you like a drink?"

You look up the see a face you recognize at the counter. A couple years ago, you used to come in here and break the law, but the bartender, a man in his twenties, showed you sympathy and still sold drinks to you, even though he knew you were underage.

This is a shady place, and you go here when it feels like no one in the world f*cking cares or accepts you.

You go here when you feel terrible, because you know here, no one cares. They accept everyone, including the terrible people.

You went here years ago because you were seeped in mental illness with no way of getting help.

Then you met Marc.

And things got better.

At first.

You let out another cry.

He was supposed to fix me. Now I'm right back where I started. Literally, in the exact same chair.

The tattooed bartender leans over the counter toward you, sliding over a drink. "You can have it for free."

You glance at him and take the glass, but don't respond.

Not even going to say thank you, are you, Y/n? the voice of the good girl you should be whispers in your head.

You ignore it, and take a sip, ignoring the man across the counter from you's eyes.

He says, "Looks like you're still walking in crying, Y/n. Like you always did."

You sniff and pretend to ignore him.

He purrs on, "Didn't see you for a while. Did some man come along and make you believe for a little while maybe life wasn't so bad?"

Your jaw clenches as you choke, "Shut up."

He nods knowingly. "That's usually the story when I see girls like you coming back."

"I told you to shut up," you snap through gritted teeth, downing another sip of your strong drink.

He smiles. "You know, you've gotten kind of hot since I saw you last?"

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"I mean that you're sexy, and I'm not surprised some young hot shot picked you up and played you."

"He's not a player!" you snap.

"That's what they all s-"

"Stop acting like you're so wise!" you snap suddenly. "You're some pathetic guy in his twenties working at a bar and letting underage girls in just- just- just because!"

But he smiles wider, which upsets you further. You finish your glass painfully. And you watch as he studies you. He reaches up and strokes your jaw, murmuring, "I've always had a thing for sassy girls."

"Sh- Shut up..." you murmur, looking down.

"You're blushing. You don't mean it."

"I don't know what I mean! I don't know what I mean or know or act about anything... I just don't know..." you cry a little.

"You seem upset."

"No f*cking kidding!" you blubber, feeling a slight glimmer of rage in your chest as you wipe at your watering eyes, though you know you're too tired and weak right now to do anything with it.

He smirks. "If you've got pent up emotions, I could help you deal with them. Possibly even make you feel better, in the end," he croons, his hand slowly, gently, dragging from your neck, down your chest, until it reaches your waist and grips it tightly.

Too tightly.

You let out a shaky breath, still lined with tears, and stand up, murmuring weakly, "Let go of me..."

His hand slips off, but he says, "Pretty Y/n isn't even going to repay me for giving her a free drink?"

"No," you snap, feeling even more shaken up than before. "I'm not."

And you turn and walk out. You walk aimlessly to the backside of the club, and sit down against the dirty crumbling wall, in the dark.

Your eyes stare ahead vacantly as chills course throughout your body.

Y/n, a voice seems to whisper in your mind, you really are alone. Completely alone.

You start sobbing again within the shadow of the curtain of night. Not even the moon and stars shine for you tonight.

Marc, why?

I'm delicate. Why can't you see that?

I'm so sorry.

[mcubuckyxlokisbitch]

OUT OF ALL THE TIMELINES

CHPT 3: Interogations and Proclamations

Short Series !

Female Asgardian reader (now avenger) X TVA Loki

Chapter 1: Avengers I need your help (done)

Chapter 2: Interrogations and proclamations (done)

Chapter 3: Even Asgardians have myths (done)

Chapter 4:

Chapter 5: -

Chapter 6: -

Surprise !!!!

Chapter 7: Chapter 8: Chapter 9 Chapter 10:

Warnings: Alot of angst <3, somebody kissed but im not saying who, mentions of blood, injury,

Summary: After your Lokis death and have moved on and joined the Avengers. After the aftermath of Endgame you and the other remaining Avengers all seek shelter in the new Avengers Warehouse Pepper Potts bought as a temporary replacement while the Avengers mansion is being renovated. What happened after a very tired mission. Well, you're speechless, to say the least.

a/n: I added a few more chapters because you know dreams lmao so enjoy this one !! Tell me if yall want smut soon. CuZ ye im feeling a smut scene some time soon.

You walked around the Avengers warehouse and got to the medic bay. The push the doors open, "How are her vitals."

"Well for one thin they don't make any sense."

"Ive been trying to heal her but, I can't get a signature on the dark magic... I need your magic to track it." Wanda says as her hands float above the blonde girl.

"She really does look like Loki its scary.... Like put a blonde wig make her shorter and put some eyelashes boom you got blondie here."

You rolled your eyes as your eyes traveled towards Ivars dark matter dagger. A strong dark force gutted your stomach, you could feel the evil from a mile away. You saw the veins around the stab wound as they turned black and spreaded around her stomach.

The only thing that could kill an Asgardian God. With its rusted blade and messily bandanged handle. Just as the myths say, the dagger was made for Odin the allfather but Ivar and his dagger were defetead and casted away before he could use it on him.

You closed your eyes and took a deep breathe to cast a simple healing spell.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Alright, enchantments are more than just casting especially when your doing a healing spell." Loki circled around you. You closed your book as you groaned, bored of slow paced lessons set by the prince.

"A healing spell I think we can do something more challenging than that Loki."

Loki stopped in his steps as he brought out his dagger and striked your leg.

"LOKI... AARGH.... YOU MISBIGOTTEN SON OF A LEPPERS GOAT. YOU DAFT ARSE" YOU SCREAMED AT HIM. He chuckled and tipped your chin to look at him with the bloodied dagger.

"Careful, if we go on legal terms thats treason against the prince and queen..." He grinned. "On more serious terms you need to learn how to cast the spell on yourself, this way casting it on others will come naturally."

You tried to hold the cut on your thigh, blood was seeping out continously as you winced when you tried to move your leg. "How am I to focus when im bleeding to death." the words gritting through your teeth.

"Close your eyes and breathe..." Loki sat behind you whispering to your ear. He placed his hands on yours and led them to your wound. "The spell only works when your calm." You took a deep breath and out as your shaky hand lay above your wound. "Feel the energy from your body, allow it to flow through your to your hands down to your wound."

You did as he said. Your enchantments extended to the wound as the blood started to lessen but the wound didn't close. "Now the difficult part. Closing the wound, you can't just imagine it to close, you know the spell."

You said aloud through your teeth holding in your pain. "Rense helbrede såret." Nothing happened, the blood lessen but the wound was still wide open. You were confused and irritated to say the least.

Loki nudged his nose towards the crook of your neck, sending shivers down your spine. "A spells power is through its whisper, to be a true master you must not only say it but think it."

Relaxing your hands as Loki slithered his to your shoulders, you casted in a whisper focusing on the spell imagining the wound closing and the energy flowing towards your wound. "Rense helbrede såret." your eyes glew orange as your enchantment casted on your leg closed the wound slowly from one end to the other. The stinging pain you felt a few seconds ago was gone. There was no mark no scar where there was once blood and torn muscle. You laughed aloud and jumped up from your seat cheering.

"I- I did it no way, I just casted a healing spell on my first try... Loki you are magnificent." You turned to the man who raised an eye brow. The unimpressed look which gutted you stomach and stopped yur cheering as you felt shameful.

"Are you proud of such a small spell I mastered long before I was 16 years old." You blushed in shame as you brough your head down. Looking away from him, you could still feel him walk closer to you. "Charms are not something you can play aroudn on the side either you take it seriously and master it or I never teach you again. Do you wish to be great or nothing...."

He was now merely inches from your as he pinched your chin and brought him to look towards him, "So tell me little girl..." At this point you could feel your heart about to jump out your heart at any moment.

"Great or nothing." he whispered

"Great..." you mumbled.

"Perfect." he leaned down as he placed your lips on yours.

--------------------------------------

"Perfect-

You snap back to reality.

"Perfect, I have the signature of the spell.... You can take the spear out whenever your ready Y/N..." Wanda smiled.

You blanked out as you saw the wound still corrupted but not as bloodied as it was before.

"Careful, won't asgardians burn or disintegrate when you touch the handle or something." Peter stopped your hand.

"It is merely a myth Peter." You held his. "It'll sting slightly but I'll be fine."

"Wow even asgardians have myths. It's like inception a myth in a myth." Ant man said chewing on his chips in the corner of the med bay on a spare bed.

You hold the dagger and it burned your hand the moment you wrapped your hand around it. You winced and pulled back your hand and shook off the heat. Everyone had their eyes on you as you tried again. You wrapped your fingers around the handle, the burning sensation started as you focused on absorbing the heat but it didn't work.

"Teya, your hand it's turning the same colour as the wound." Sam pointed out

Your hand was corrupted. You casted a healing spell on your hand as you held the dagger handle tighter ignoring the warnings from your teamates.

Only one of asgardian strength can pull out the dagger. But anyone who lays in the hand on the dagger, will meet death.

It was a phrase, a warning actually, you remembered like the back of your hand from your favourite tale.

You pulled the dagger out with some force as the wound on the body closed. You dropped the dagger on the ground as you did too.

You were on your knees as your hand turned black and you wrapped your other hand on it trying to heal it. The room felt like it was a million degrees as you felt the darkness travel through your veins.

"Y/N whats going on..." Sam said kneeling down beside you. "FRIDAY RADIO STRANGE FOR AN SOS."

"Yelena, get Thor, Parker make sure Barnes does not know about this make sure they stay with Loki."

"Don't tell James." You whispered to Sam

"Not a chance princess."

"Wanda hows the wound." You looked up in pain.

"Closing in. But old Asgardian magic is complicated, I need time to find a way for it to not spread."

"Sam, I'm fine." you groaned through the pain still trying to cast the healing spell on your arm.

"Ya say that to your black hand. And..... woah." Sam started to let your hand go when your hand to elbow was turning black

"I'm here..." Stephen walked through a portal.

"Her eyes." Sam said concerened as there was no white left in your eyes just pitch black.

You forced yourself to stand up. Your shaking right hand corrupted as you projected your powers towards the dagger on the ground. Focusing the dark energy to leave your body. You groaned as you saw Stephen observe the situation and walk towards your arm.

"Keep focusing project any corrupted magic into the dagger."

Strange got to position and casted a cleansing spell on you. Helping to slip the dark energy off you. You felt your powers slipping away from you as the dark matter did.

When you felt no more corrupted magic you stopped as there was no more magic to give. Your knees felt weak and you tried to walk towards the closest bed but crumble and fell like a new born baby giraffe.

"I got you gurl." Sam caught you before you hit the ground.

"That was very stupid of you..." Strange said as he walked towards the sword glowing red and black. He formed a shield around it as it levitated towards you. "Here this won't get your hand burnt."

"Y/N, your hand. It.... it, that looks like a raisin." Thor winced.

"Thank you Thor, for that obvious comment." your groaned standing up, carrying the bubble with the dagger with your undwounded hand you walked towards the blonde girl. Who seemed to be breathing better as her vitals improved. You took a deep breathe to feel her aura and her health. Which was improving slowly, slower than it must, you looked up towards the body 2 beds down. "Strange what can be evaluated of this mans vitals..."

Strange walked over to the white haired man and hovered over him. Levitating his file to his hands and read through it. "This man is, hm...."

"Check the jacket , TVA ever heard of anything like it." Sam said tossing the jacket towards Strange. Strange looked at the jacket spread wide open hovering infront of him. "Yes the TVA, yes...... I- I actually never heard of them is this made up?"

"Well there goes our backup." Sam groaned plopping himself back on the bed.

"Well there isn't anything we can do. I'll take the dagger back to my room and we'll recon with Loki tomorow... Everyone eat, the food is here get some sleep, meet up first thing tomorow morning 7 am." You said walking out the medbay. "Friday keep an eye on our guest... update us if anything."

"Yes boss." the loud speaker said before the doors closed.

"A bit random but shes can be very attractive when she gets all demanding and stern." Yelena smirked.

----------------------------------------------------

You placed the sphere down on your tv table plopping down on your bed. You winced as your injured hand grazed against the sheets, clenching it with your other hand forcing down another healing spell, nothing, the redness seemed to fade away for a moment but it still looked bad.

There came a sudden knock on the door. "Y/N??" "Go away strange..."

"Actually." Thor opened the door and gave you a sympathetic smile.

"Thor... Hows-

"Your hand, does it hurt- is it corrupted- how are you do you feel well?" Thor rushed over to your side and sat down on your bed. "Let me see maybe I can be of an assistance.'

"If I remembered correctly you failed enchantment and healing lessons set by your own mother." you pulled your hand away.

"I have improved..." Thor said crossing his arms.

"Of course you have." You stood up and walked to your closet to change into something more comfortable.

"I'm sorry..."

"What?"

"I can't go through this again."

"No one is forcing you to be on this assingment. You may return to new asgard and take a break."

"You should be as well."

"Thor the team needs atleast 1 person who knows Loki."

"What if they didn't." Thor said plainly. You turned towards him confused, but you knew where he was getting to. " What if but for one moment we were selfish, what if we were not heroes, mere asgardians who simply needs to be born, live, then die."

"Thor-."

"You were right..." Thor sobbed, tears forming around his eyes. "It's just like Ragnarok all over again." He stared at the ground.

You walk towards Thor and lifted his chin up. "What can I say to the brother who has been my strength for centuries ..." You sighed "I know with Asgard gone, our duties blur with the destinies we thought we could have lived. For once... I really have nothing to say."

"He looks so much like him." Thor laid his head against your stomach. "I couldn't bear myself to get to know him."

You sighed and stroked his hair back. "You need not talk to him unless absolutely necesarry."

"Falling inlove with him... Loving my brother seems to be the one thing I cannot prevent myself from doing." Thor choked out. "Even though I know the outcome I can't help a part of myself to hope."

"Lets eat... you always feel better after we eat. We shouldn't think about this right now." You brought Thor up. As he leaned forward and embraced you.

"I miss him."

"Me too."

"It's been hard..."

"I know." You sniffled as you stopped the moment and stared out your window. You looked up to him. "Shall we join the others for dinner? "

"We shall." he smiled down as you placed a soft kiss on his cheek.

[kenobster]

Since writing for the SW fandom, I've been complimented on how I write emotion. As an English major, I am unfortunately compelled to analyze my process, and after many hours of thinking aloud at my poor mother, I think I've finally cracked the code.

My advice is to Lie.

Set your fucking pants on fire.

You see, emotions in storytelling don't spawn from the reality of what is happening. Emotions spawn from the reader's FEELINGS about what is happening. This may seem obvious at a glance, but so many writers fail to aim for the latter. For example, have you ever watched a character die in a movie and felt nothing whatsoever? Contrast that to a movie where a death did make you feel something, where it made you sob buckets, where it had you grieving long after the credits rolled. I guarantee that the difference between those two reactions did not involve the methods of the deaths themselves, but rather something about the latter movie's death feeling Wrong to you in some way — maybe unfair, or unjust, or untimely, or unexpected. Something about that death, you disagreed with. Something about that death made you feel betrayed.

Fiction operates by different rules than the ones in reality. In real life, we're sad when someone dies simply because they died. In fiction, however, someone dying (aka a bad thing happening) isn't actually sad on its own. That's why beginner writing, even when depicting the most brutal whump, can often bore you to tears. Whether or not you care about the character is irrelevant; what matters is how that character interacts (often unexpectedly) with other narrative elements (i.e. other characters, settings, plotlines, etc). For example, you'll grieve more intensely for a dying character if there is another character screaming in anguish. You'll react more viscerally to a tragedy if you can visualize an alternative plotline where it didn't happen. And this goes for any emotion in fiction. It's not the sad thing or the happy thing or the disgusting thing or the smutty thing; it's the way the thing works within the story to challege the reader's expectations.

In other words, if you're telling the reader what they're already thinking, then you're doing it wrong. And if you're telling the reader what YOU (the writer) are already thinking, then you're doing it worse.

To tell compelling stories, you absolutely have to LIE.

I hate using my fic to explain this mechanic, but (1) I don't feel comfortable using other authors' processes when I run the risk of misrepresenting their thoughts; and (2) I would feel comfortable using a movie example, but I really want this post to be about writing fanfiction specifically. Thus, for lack of a better option (and since this is my own writing process), my fic seems like my best bet. So, putting aside my crippling insecurity for the sake of the Advice lol...

In Every Shadow, you wanna know why y'all are so engaged with Obi-Wan's emotions? It's because I'm lying. I (not the characters, not Obi-Wan, but me, the author) am lying to you (the reader). I'm doing it all of the time.

For example, nobody actually blames Obi-Wan for what happened to the Togrutan colonists on Kadavo. Nobody actually thinks it's his fault Governor Roshti was whipped. Or that he's to blame for the slaves that Keeper Arguss killed. Everyone understands that it's the Zygerrians'/Keeper Arguss's/Miraj's fault.

That's what you already know. That's what I already know.

So I lie about it:

What he did was leave her and her kin to the whims of a sadist. What he did was keep his head down while the other slaves were whipped and beaten and murdered. What he did was bide his time, pray for aid, and lose himself in grief while innocents paid the price for his inaction. What he did was nothing. Absolutely nothing.

This paragraph is compelling not because slaves are being whipped/beaten/murdered and not because Obi-Wan can't do anything about it. It's compelling because we both know it's not Obi-Wan's fault... and yet he is saying it is. Your truth is that Obi-Wan shouldn't blame himself. My truth is that Obi-Wan shouldn't blame himself. Thus, when I lie about it (within his POV), you feel betrayed. In that moment, you don't trust me. You start to wonder if I actually know the truth. Your expectation changes into something else — that maybe I do think Obi-Wan should be blamed.

So I betray you again:

"I’m sorry,” he says. "I’m so, so sorry."

Wheezes of breath whistle through her lips. Her eyes close. "D-Don't be. You were—are—a beacon—of light… but e-even you—cannot shine away—every shadow…"

This time (via an outside source instead of the narrator), I am betraying you with kindness — with the truth. You're relieved, perhaps, but it's still a surprise — and a manipulation. Thus, the feeling of betrayal persists.

In other words, I lied to you so that what I was planning on telling you wouldn't be what you were already thinking. I lied to you so that you wouldn't expect the truth.

I lied to you in order to tell you the truth.

When you practice this device, you'll find there are lots of fun and interesting ways to play. For instance, in the above example, you and I had an identical understanding of the Truth... but it can get even more complicated when the author's version of the truth and the reader's version differ (which is often what I'm doing in Five Peggats Each to make Anakin unreliable as a narrator). Alternating between the reader's truth, the author's truth, and total bullshit is what swings the reader's feelings in any particular direction. If you master this ability, then you'll be able to master your reader's perception of everything. They'll empathize with whatever story you present because their thoughts/opinions/takes will be wrapped around your finger until the very last page.

It's hard for authors to do this because... well... it's lying. If we applied everything I'm describing to something other than storytelling, it would be considered emotional abuse lmao, and luckily most of us seem to understand that emotionally abusing people is a pretty lame thing to do... But you're not doing yourself, your story, or your reader any favors by applying real world morality to the morality of storytelling. Fiction is already a lie by its very nature. By writing, it's already assumed that you're going to deceive.

So, you want to make your readers feel strong emotions? You want to make your readers cry? Laugh? Love? Hate?

Gaslight the shit out of them. Lovebomb them. Groom them. Psychologically abuse them until they're so damaged they keep coming back.

I may sound like I'm kidding, but I very much am not — because fiction is is a genre that is uniquely intended to operate by pathos (persuasion via emotion). Your reader wants to be gaslit and lovebombed and groomed by the narrative. By reading, they are consenting to the emotional abuse of a story. Don't shy away from that trust. Don't feel like every word you write needs to perfectly reflect what people expect or what you believe.

Respect your readers by giving them hell. Respect your readers by Lying to them.

[iviarellereads]

The Great Hunt, Chapter 10 - The Hunt Begins

(THIS PROJECT IS SPOILER FREE! No spoilers past the chapter you click on. Curious what I'm doing here? Read this post! For the link index and a primer on The Wheel of Time, read this one! Like what you see? Send me a Ko-Fi.)

(Horn icon) In which that's something beyond evil.

PERSPECTIVE: Rand, as Ingtar sets a fast pace, hoping to catch them up despite the head start. Rand worries about the horses, but says nothing, because it’s Ingtar’s command and Rand is still just a shepherd.(1) At one point though, one of the men, Uno, says Ingtar's going to kill the horses at this rate. It's not until much later in the day that Ingtar sees sense, and they start alternating walked and ridden miles. Mat and Perrin continue to avoid Rand, along with some of the retinue.

The path avoids all settlements. They sometimes see farms or villages in the distance, but never close enough that they'd have seen the Trollocs et al coming or going clearly. Eventually, Ingtar finally calls to make camp for the night after twilight. When Rand takes out his bundles from the pack horses, he shouts so loudly that several men come running, swords out. He's a little embarrassed that it was just because he saw his coats, the supposedly serviceable, low-key ones: both more ornate than the one he's already wearing. Ingtar points out that they are wearable, and Moiraine Sedai saw to Rand's packing personally. Rand thinks he'd almost rather go naked.(2)

Masema is serving the stew, and slops a bit of Rand's meanly. Ingtar is sitting next to Mat and Perrin, so Rand sits near them, glad that his friends don't leave again. He wonders aloud why Masema hates him. Ingtar hesitates, but says that Masema fought against the Aiel for three years once, and he (Ingtar) is glad to take everyone's word that Rand is from the Two Rivers, but Masema can't see past the resemblance to his enemies.(3)

Rand dropped his spoon in the plate with a sigh. “Everybody thinks I’m somebody I am not. I am from the Two Rivers, Ingtar. I grew tabac with—with my father, and tended his sheep. That is what I am. A farmer and shepherd from the Two Rivers.” “He’s from the Two Rivers,” Mat said scornfully. “I grew up with him, though you’d never know it now. You put this Aiel nonsense in his head on top of what’s already there, and the Light knows what we’ll have. An Aiel lord, maybe.” “No,” Loial said, “he has the look. You remember, Rand, I remarked on it once, though I thought it was just because I didn’t know you humans well enough then. Remember? ‘Till shade is gone, till water is gone, into the Shadow with teeth bared, screaming defiance with the last breath, to spit in Sightblinder’s eye on the Last Day.’ You remember, Rand.” Rand stared at his plate. Wrap a shoufa around your head, and you would be the image of an Aielman. That had been Gawyn, brother to Elayne, the Daughter-Heir of Andor. Everybody thinks I’m somebody I’m not.

Ingtar says Aiel only recognize themselves, gleemen, peddlers, and their enemies. They changed that for Cairhien 500 years ago, for no reason anyone else can tell, but after the Aiel War 20-odd years ago, he doesn't think they ever will again. Loial says they're willing to let the Tuatha'an into their Wastes, and they trade with Ogier sometimes, for sung wood, but they're a hard people. Ingtar wishes he had some men half as hard as any Aiel. Mat wonders if that's a joke.

“Aiel are hard,” Ingtar said. “Man and woman, hard. I’ve fought them, and I know. They will run fifty miles, and fight a battle at the end of it. They’re death walking, with any weapon or none. Except a sword. They will not touch a sword, for some reason. Or ride a horse, not that they need to. If you have a sword, and the Aielman has his bare hands, it is an even fight. If you’re good. They herd cattle and goats where you or I would die of thirst before the day was done. They dig their villages into huge rock spires out in the Waste. They’ve been there since the Breaking, near enough. Artur Hawkwing tried to dig them out and was bloodied, the only major defeats he ever suffered. By day the air in the Aiel Waste shimmers with heat, and by night it freezes. And an Aiel will give you that blue-eyed stare and tell you there is no place on earth he would rather be. He won’t be lying, either. If they ever tried to come out, we would be hard-pressed to stop them.(4) The Aiel War lasted three years, and that was only four out of thirteen clans.”

Mat mutters that grey eyes from his mother don't make him Aiel, but Rand remembers Moiraine's story about his birth, and as he settles in for sleep, he repeats that he won't be used.

The next morning they continue before dawn, until they come on an abandoned camp. Hurin says there was worse than murder done here, and they turned northeast. An hour's ride later, Hurin says they turned south again, and another murder. The next day continues the same, slowly gaining ground based on the tracks and remains, but more direction changes, and more murders. After Ingtar says they won’t lose time burying Darkfriends, the subject doesn’t come up, even when they believe the victims are Shienaran.

Eventually, they come upon the River Erinin, a few hours past breaking camp. Long past time to have found the Trolloc camp and first direction changes, from the pattern of the last several days, but instead they come to a quiet village near a river much smaller than the stories made it out to be.(5)

Perrin says the village smells wrong, getting him a look from Hurin.(6) But he's right: there's no one left here. Uno sees a woman in a white dress in a window, and runs for the house, but it's empty after all.(7) Hurin says there was no murder here, but violence of a sort he's never smelled before, and something across the river.

Ingtar sends two men to retrieve the ferry, sitting on the far bank, and to scout for any ambush. They come back unable to put words to what they saw, but there's no ambush, for certain. Rand et al are in the first group to cross the ferry, though Mat still sneers at Rand's coat. Perrin remarks that this is how they left home, on Taren Ferry, and says it will be worse this time. Both Rand and Mat are curious why he'd say this. Perrin just says he can smell it.

Fifty paces from the ferry, they find the bodies, strung up to a tree. The two faces are intact, Changu and Nidao, the guards Rand met the first time Egwene brought him to see Fain. They've been skinned alive. Rand seeks the Void, but feels more sick inside it.(8) Some men start digging graves, and Loial explains Shienaran burial rites: no clothes, no shroud, no coffin, just plain burial. Someone might say a particular ritual phrase over the graves, but that's unlikely here: these must have been the men who killed the guards and let the Trollocs into the Keep.

However, before they leave, Ingtar does say the words over the two unmarked graves. Nobody comments, but he looks at every man in turn before saying that they saved Lord Agelmar at Tarwin's Gap.(9) Then off they ride.

They come upon an old, abandoned manor house, and there's some discussion of countries that once were, but are no longer. Loial talks about how many cities and countries fail, sometimes because the population dwindles, sometimes trade stops, and sometimes crops fail too many years in a row. Ingtar says yes, and what city will not fail tomorrow, or the next day? Humankind is being swept away. How long until there's nothing left but the borderlands, and how long until not even that? The whole group is shocked into silence, and rides on.(10)

They come upon another village some time later that day, abandoned too. All the villages here have a grudge against Shienarans, because Shienar can’t or won’t spare soldiers to defend them against human brigands, when the Blight is right there. The men prepare for a fight as they near.

Some of the men go to check the houses for occupants, and Rand approaches a door, but stops short, then chides himself for being afraid of an empty door. Inside is a tidy room, flies buzzing around the food laid out on the table, even a roast, cold in its own congealed grease. He blinks, and sees a vision of a smiling family, serving themselves from the food, when it was fresh. Suddenly, one of the girls screams, pointing at the road. The door bursts open and...

Rand blinks again, and they're gone, the flies sounding louder. Blink again, and the vision starts over from the beginning. Over and over. Between the visions, the room starts to feel very, very cold to him, but he can't move, until suddenly he starts to feel warm and breaks free of it, tearing at unseen cobwebs holding him.(11)

He hears Mat yell that there's nothing in the house he looked in, and Rand resolves not to enter another house in the village. There's a commotion in the main square, and when he approaches, it's not more people murdered... not exactly. A Myrddraal, a Fade, has been murdered and near crucified on the biggest door in the village.

“Who,” Mat began, and had to stop to swallow. “Who could do this to a Fade?” His voice squeaked at the end. “I don’t know,” Ingtar said. “I do not know.”(12) He looked around, examining faces, or perhaps counting to be sure everyone was there. “And I do not think we will learn anything here. We ride. Mount! Hurin, find the trail out of this place.” “Yes, my Lord. Yes. With pleasure. That way, my Lord. They’re still heading south.” They rode away leaving the dead Myrddraal where it hung, the wind stirring its black cloak. Hurin was first beyond the wall, not waiting on Ingtar for a change, but Rand came close behind him.

=====

(1) Is he still just that? Was he ever just a shepherd? (2) As much as Rand, rightly and fairly, doesn't want to be manipulated into doing something against his will, we've known since the first page that he was the Dragon, and if he's going to fulfill all these prophecies, better to look a lord than a beggar, to look the way people will expect the Dragon to look and be more willing to accept him in the role even as they may despise what he means for the world. (3) Especially when Aiel looks seem so distinctive. There were a few folk in Caemlyn who had paler skin and lighter hair, like the Trakands, but the implication is that's pretty rare in the wider world. No wonder he's been treated very oddly by the Shienarans since his arrival there, and no wonder Moiraine's been fighting so hard to build him up a reputation as a lordling so he couldn't possibly be an Aielman. (4) Gee, I wonder if that'll become relevant again. (5) The narration (Rand) attributes this to it being far from its source. Do you think Robert Jordan knew how rivers work? That they're fed all along and tend to get bigger the further they travel, biggest as they approach their lake or ocean endpoint. Rand probably wouldn't know that, whether RJ did or not. (6) Given everything, it's possible Perrin just smelled the decay or some such, from a greater distance. Who knows what wolves smell? (7) A mysterious woman in a white dress? Keep a pin in that for now. (8) Now THAT'S odd. What about the flame and void might make Rand feel sick, or is it just too much for even that trick to work? (9) After leaving so many behind, he takes the time for this? Just because we recognize their names, or does he finally feel guilty over leaving the others? (10) This guy seems real pessimistic suddenly. But, look at Shienar. They watched Malkier fall to the Blight well within living memory. Who wouldn't be a bit pessimistic about humanity's chances as the signs ramp up for the final confrontation? And when faced with this much death and betrayal and just everything? (11) Rand's visions in the house are creepy as hell, and the cold kinda makes me wonder if this is Power at play, or something else… perhaps the same kind of "strange thing" that Lan refers to happening close to the Blight, when Rand gets caught by the wind during their practice fight in chapter 1. But, the Dark One is stirring in his prison, his influence on the world growing. Who's to say what effect that might have? (12) Who could do this to a Fade? What could be WORSE than a Fade? Why do all my sentences now end in question marks?

[idk-how-cars-work]

I posted 744 times in 2022

That's 744 more posts than 2021!

169 posts created (23%)

575 posts reblogged (77%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@google-searchhistory-official

@pogasm

@anarchist-mlm

@restonrosebleed

@idk-how-cars-work

I tagged 428 of my posts in 2022

Only 42% of my posts had no tags

#lgbtq - 19 posts

#dreamwastaken - 16 posts

#transgender - 15 posts

#<3333 - 14 posts

#iconic - 14 posts

#boost - 12 posts

#gender stuff - 10 posts

#hermitcraft - 9 posts

#hmmmm - 8 posts

#stories from the deep - 6 posts

Longest Tag: 137 characters

#i am at a genuine loss for words. why. the longer i look at it the further into madness i descend. why is there a peen. wasn't he a fish.

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Nobody:

My friend when Charlie Spring: T-R-A-U-M-A HE HAS TRAUMA AND HE'S 🏳️‍🌈G A Y🏳️‍🌈

29 notes - Posted May 13, 2022

#4

MORE of my TBP headcanons because of course there's more

Mostly Vance and Bruce with Implided Brance but some Finn, Robin and gwen

No Grabber au I hate him sm

Robin tends to ba confidently wrong

Finney is a man of few words until you get to know him

Vance stole the switchblade

Gwen loves stuffed animals and figures

Bruce loves learning about Greek Mythology, Egyptian Mythology etc

And Vance is down to just like. Play with his hair while Bruce rambles on about how Zeus is the true villan and Hades isn't unjust

Vance is the kind of person who listens but can't remember (AHEM MORE AUTISTIC VANCE AGENDA)

Bruce reads very fast, so fast that he struggles to read aloud

Some guy called Vance a pussy once because of the choker and Vance beat the shit out of him

Vance's favorite Horror movie is Scream

Bruce hates horror in general but watches them with Vance for his sake

I've said it before I'll say it again: BRUCE IS VANCES BIGGEST INSTIGATOR.

Once Bruce got so mad he almost knocked a kid with his bat

Vance is absolutely petrified of spiders

But Bruce loves bugs

Bruce is SO FUCKING STRONG like he picks Vance up like he's nothing but an angry cat to him

And Vance loves it so much; he loves not having to be in control

29 notes - Posted October 20, 2022

#3

HERMITCRAFT BODY MODIFICATION HEADCANONS: PART ONE

uh yeah I got bored and so here's what I think hermits would get in terms of body mods (tattoos, peircings, scarification, cosmetic surgery etc)

Disclaimer: these are my opinions!!! You can have them for ur designs if u want!!! No credit needed!!!

Disclaimer #2: all of these are for the hermitcraft characters not the real people.

Grian: He has a traffic smp tattoo on his lower back.

Scar: Jellie tattoo. He had his Earlobes peirced but they closed up. He also tried scarification and got a tiny heart next to the Jellie.

Mumbo: earlobes peirced, usually has either gold or pearl studs in

Tango: Septum peircing. Decked Out tattoo sleeve. Nipple peircings.

Ren: Earlobes; wears little hoops.

Impulse: micro tattoo of waves behind ears. Lots of ear peircings. Stretched ears.

Iskall: one tat on upper arm of iskallium and same ear peircings as Impulse

Xisuma: As many mods as he had bitches. None. Negative 1.

Gem: little mushroom with a fairy on upper arm. Earlobes peirced, often wears pretty dangling earrings.

Pearl: Earlobes, wears pearl studs.

False: none

Cleo: had a tattoo on ribs but then it rotted away.

Bdubs: none

44 notes - Posted September 2, 2022

#2

FINALLY: THE PATCH PANTS TOUR

These are about 1 1/2 months old, so they haven't really bloomed into crust pants yet but I still love them.

Below: baphomet patch

(September 2, 2022)

See the full post

49 notes - Posted September 2, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

patches for my vest bcuz it's lacking

From left to right: not emo, I ENJOY THINGS A NORMAL AMOUNT, kein mensch ist illegal*, a Fresno nightcrawler with the text "Fresno, CA" at the top, Nobody likes Gender Roles, rainbow flag, ? , QUEER RIGHTS RIGHT NOW, red drips, Destructo Disk

*kein mensch ist illegal = no one is illegal in german

53 notes - Posted November 26, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

I'm not even surprised tbh except for the patch post?? I posted that like 2-3ish weeks ago??? Huh???

[notdonebeingmessy]

Welp, suffering from another major depressive episode so it's time to talk to myself on a digital platform rather than seeing a therapist.

And so the old song goes for the working class non-gender-specific person.

Someone said the other day that there's a difference between being open and being vulnerable... And after some time processing this, I realized that it's been a while since I've been vulnerable. I used to have no qualms about bearing my soul. To the point where it alienated people because I was voicing all sorts of messy inner dialogues aloud. I was unapologetically screaming my feelings across social media. And that sort of behavior makes others uncomfortable. Even those who you feel are your "forever friends"™️. Once you become cringe incarnate, it doesn't leave you with very many people who would like to admit they're associated with you. What I'm getting at is the commonfolk feel secondhand embarrassment over that sort of candor. You're better off airing out your grievances in front of your 1st world village's town hall... And you're more likely to find someone who'll care that way. Not that anyone should.

Anyway...

So, vulnerability... This thing that I connect with an authentic human experience. I (ever the narcissist) can't help but wonder how this premise of openness vs vulnerability might relate to me.

Why am I so closed up right now? And the most joyless I've ever been? Even though I have a fulfilling job, the love of a loyal so and so, plenty of friends who would probably show up to my funeral as long as it was held on a weekend, etc?

It might be because I refuse to make myself vulnerable. In making myself an inpregnable rock and/or island, I've created a mighty fortress to wither away in alone. Figures. But here I am. I shouldn't allow my depression the satisfaction of me feeling sorry for myself. Or, I shouldn't allow "the depressed part of me" the satisfaction of me feeling sorry for myself. (Whichever sounds most like I'm blaming myself and not an invisible illness.) Maybe it's a moral failing. Anyway, I feel alone.

Even at my happiest nowadays, I feel a massive falta en mi alma-- an actual toll that feels like a slow death. I have this really weird need to be understood. I need to know that someone out there can know me for a collective 75 hours and then tell me exactly how I would react under a certain set of parameters. I don't think that's neurotypical at best. Ha! But no, even knowing me for years, someone on this green earth should be able to decipher me to me by now.

If I think really hard, I can come up with 2 people who seemed to wander upon the cusp of almost knowing me. Only 1 has biblically known me, but 1 or 2 have "known" me. And the former has never "known" me. Isn't that kind of sad?

*In Daria's voice*: Well...

At least someone out there in the ether might be able to relate to this and we can be alone together like in a shojo anime... Or a particular manga by Shin Takahashi.

[the-letter-horror-lover]

BORUTO ALTER: Last Shinobi by SongofVedas

Anime » Naruto Rated: T, English, Adventure & Fantasy, Naruto U., Sasuke U., Boruto U., Sarada U., Words: 112k+, Favs: 48, Follows: 49, Published: Dec 2, 2020 Updated: Jul 19

21Chapter 21: BORUTO'S BREAKTHROUGH

BORUTO/ALTER.

"EVERYONE...everyone is dead.." she whispered. Boruto's eyes tightened.

He turned in bed.

Boruto smelled blood. Fire seemed to curl around his back. His stomach felt as if he was pressed against hard and splintered wood.

He felt weight cause the ground to shake.

Boruto attempted to move again.

He couldn't. He then realized that he wasn't breathing.

No, that's not it.

I can't breathe.

She was about to say something- but uttered an almost silent gasp instead. Boruto felt steps hurriedly hone in on him.

"..what are you doing.. Amakushiki..."

She reached over to hold his hand. It trembled, slack with terrified sweat that rolled down Boruto's face as well.

He attempted to wake. It was to no avail.

I'm in bed. I know I am.

But Boruto also felt the flames. smelled the blood. Heard her gasping cries.

He peered at the being directly above him.

It stood, before slowly freeing itself from the bloodied floor with an imperial presence. Long white hair fell behind a slender pale face. It was dressed in a simple black kimono, slim across an androgynous figure. It wore wooden sandals the color of deep blood, slightly dipped as it hovered.

It seemed young. It bore rectangular, red tattoos on its forehead and across its cheeks. Both of its scarred eyes.. held the Byakugan.

Boruto thrashed as the being looked down upon him. His vision became distorted.

"Ninurta-" Boruto felt hands attempt to tighten their hold. Seconds later, She screamed.

"Why can't I feel you anymore? Where are you?!"

Boruto's sight returned for a flashing moment. He saw the figure, the scarred one who stared down upon him, now contorted in a violent, crazed grimace. A pallid finger rose-

The sound was as if a thousand glass cups broke simultaneously.

She cried aloud in fear.

Boruto saw curling wraiths, leering spirits that seemed to claw at whatever was around them.

Then, his vision went black.

Echoing whispers bounced between Boruto's consciousness.

"Enough, Amakushiki." A strong, rumbling voice commanded.

"...Did you not hear that cry?! They got away..the remnants. What we killed...were husks. A vile and mundane trap...set by the previous seed!" Another voice protested with haunting fervor.

"...re is noth... I will not ha... you... ru.."

The voices seemed to grow quieter and harder to discern.

".. y-.. successor.."

Boruto realized then he felt motion.

Now, however, he wasn't in bed. In fact-

I feel as if I have no.. body?

He saw.. but it was blackness.

The blackness turned to a wide expanse of blinking stars. Once again, it felt as if the constellations were a part of him.

Boruto.. continued. He forced his consciousness, his being, ahead.

As he did an onyx, tranquil sea took up sight as far as Boruto could discern, devouring the stars up to a shifting horizon.

However, the voices were now closer.

"...cleansing this seed bed before the Consort arrives is our purpose. However, you alone, Amakushi-"

Boruto heard another violent crash.

The ebony lake trembled, thick like blood.

"I said Enough, Amakushiki!"

The voices shouted at each other between sloshing waves.

"He's there..! Can you not see?! He's there! Survivors right before us! He'll doom us! He'll kill us!"

Then, Boruto was back with her.

The fire was all around. It was an unnatural flame- skeletons of black chakra danced within it. Boruto scanned cataclysmic land.

He saw corpses strung about the roaring hell. Silhouettes of huts became smoldering blazes betwixt two shadows slowly striding away, clean of their wonton chaos.

She was no longer sobbing.

She shook- breathing heavily beside Boruto.

"We're.. we're not hurt. It's because of you, Ninurta. I know it is. Everyone else is dead..they.. killed everyone..."

Echoed crying was heard once more, backed by disembodied screaming ringing within Boruto's ear as images, colors, even smells- vortexed, before coalescing into a blinding light.

Then, Boruto saw a pale man with white hair that seemed tinged with blue hues. He wore ornate white robes. His eyes were closed into fine slits. He stood upon cragged ground.

Stars blinked around the man's shoulders.

"So.. it is you. Cursed Eye.."

Boruto sat up in bed. He nearly threw himself out of it. A cool chill settled within his room. Drawing arms closer around a trembling body, Boruto looked to the window.

It was almost morning.

Boruto shut throbbing eyes, rubbing them before moving black hair away from clammy forehead.

He saw the dream again.

The smell. The heat.

The voices.

Everyone is dead..

Boruto shivered.

No point focusing on whatever.. that was. I need to be strong now.

For Hima.

Konohamaru had asked to train yesterday. Boruto obliged, happily.

He knew Konohamaru was worried.

Boruto was too, of course.

There hasn't been word from either Moegi or Mugino. Kakashi's silence is expected.. but typically the other two were the type to have sent multiple reports within this timeframe.

Don't die out there, Shikadai.

Boruto looked down at his hands.

Is this.. the truth of Shinobi? Waiting for your loved ones to die horrible deaths when they're not around?

Boruto frowned. He stepped out of bed slowly, body aching. He had been training every day with Mitsuki.. his chakra control had improved.

Will it be enough?

Boruto still couldn't mold the chakra in the slight deviation needed to break the rubber ball. The trick of chakra control at that point is being able to move chakra outside of its normal pathways to create external manifestations.

Which is why if it is misapplied for even a moment-

Boruto was reminded of the pain that failure brought. His arm seemed as if it bore thousands of miniature cuts along his bones and muscles.

He dressed, pulling his black and purple jacket across tired arms while exiting to a darkened hallway.

As Boruto passed through his living room, he saw Hinata sleeping on a large green couch. Boruto frowned.

Staying up worried about Himawari.

Hinata felt as if she needed to be awake at all times were something to happen.. or if Himawari were to come conscious and need her.

I don't blame you, mom.

They were all in a constant state of dull, gnawing dread.

He approached quietly, pulling a blanket from a nearby chair and placing it over Hinata.

Boruto smiled at her, before gingerly stepping for their door and then, the outside world.

The morning air wa-

"Boruto." Mitsuki's face suddenly leapt from seemingly nowhere, yellow eyes boring into Boruto's own.

"You're early, Mitsuki." Boruto frowned.

He moved past-

Mitsuki allowed him to, but stood closer than even he typically would.

"I'm sorry Boruto." He smiled.

"You're really not." Boruto sighed, slowing down but continuing ahead, Konoha's tall buildings standing over them.

"True. There is something important I would like to talk with you about." Mitsuki said.

Boruto looked over at him then, raising a brow.

His speech is a little more animated..

"I'm about to go meet Konohamaru where we've been training. We can talk privately on the way there." Boruto looked away from Mitsuki's nod.

They quickly left Konoha's gates. Before long, Boruto and Mitsuki were upon familiar brown dirt road, pathing through mazes of towering trees.

Finally, Mitsuki spoke.

"What happened at Sumire's.." he began.

Boruto glared at him.

"I don't think it was anything. My chakra levels have been fluctuating since I've been training so much. My body is stressed, probably." Boruto swallowed heavily.

Mitsuki maintained his gaze.

"That's what I want to talk about. You screamed, Boruto. Like you were in pain. Your chakra also felt like the thing that attacked Himawari. No, it was.. cleaner , somehow. But the density was the same." Mitsuki's voice was neutral while eyes blinked with almost veiled emotion.

Boruto was silent.

A million thoughts raced through Boruto's mind, before churning into a feeling of rejection, a feeling of comforting ignorance as opposed to the truth of whatever horror lurked within him.

Cursed Eye..

Boruto felt a chill swarm over his skin.

He opened his mouth, then closed it.

Mitsuki watched, concern vaguely written about his near stoic face.

Finally, Boruto spoke.

"Please Mitsuki.. never bring this up again." Boruto uttered softly.

The wind blew between them, throwing errant leaves into the air.

Mitsuki looked away.

"I won't." He answered. Springcloud white hair, kissed with blue, crossed Mistuki's yellow eyes, catching Boruto's own. Emotions sang in the silence on the way to their Sensei.

KONOHAMARU raised his eyes to movement breaking free of wavering trees.

There you are, Boruto. It's good to see Mitsuki with you, as well. You need to keep yourself around people.

Konohamaru smiled, waving.

"Boruto, Mitsuki! Good morning."

Boruto seemed.. quieter than usual. He nodded, blue-silver eyes catching Konohamaru behind black hair. Mitsuki gave Boruto a half second glance, before bowing to Konohamaru.

"Good morning, Sensei." He said plainly.

Konohamaru frowned.

"Is everything okay?" He asked, before instantly regretting it.

Stupid! Of course everything isn't okay!

Konohamaru laughed nervously, scratching his head.

"Sorry, no doubt you're exhausted. Let's just get to it. Have you broken the rubber ball yet?" Konohamaru spoke as he led them to the center of the clearing.

Grass softly sang in the calm breeze, while fat clouds hung high beside a brilliant sun.

A good day for spontaneity.

"No, not yet. Though I can almost visualize it more now. What I have to create." Boruto answered, walking ahead of Konohamaru and Mitsuki.

Create?

"What do you mean?" Konohamaru asked.

I had suspected he didn't have enough chakra to sufficiently burst the ball.

Sure..a well trained Shinobi, even one with low chakra, could rupture it. But the trick is applying enough chakra to a specific point and destroying it without harming yourself, or weakening the chakra being used-rendering the energy exuded useless.

It's why the Rasengan is such an advanced technique.. in some ways, it's more advanced than the variation of chakra control medical nin use.

Boruto sighed, pulling the ball from his jacket's pocket.

He braced.

Then, Boruro stepped one leg ahead of his body-

That's a Hyuga stance!

Boruto closed his eyes.

Konohamaru watched intently. The wind seemed to grow faster.

Konohamaru narrowed brown eyes as chakra rose from Boruto.

This chakra.. it's different than if it was normal infusion. The variation is slight.. but I can tell he's cycling it through his body.. as opposed to producing it from each of his chakra points as normal infusion entails.

Konohamaru caressed his chin, deep in thought.

It's as if he's using Naruto's spur of the moment genius with Minato's calculated application..

The chakra from Boruto was growing stronger. However, the volume of it seemed to remain the same.

The ball trembled to the left of Boruto's palm.

Konohamaru glanced at Boruto's face. The boy's eyes were closed, mouth closed in a silent grimace.

However, he exhaled with a soft hiss, relaxing his jaw.

The ball bounced upwards in Boruto's palm- before landing squarely back onto it.

To generate that response without experiencing pain or wasting chakra-

Konohamaru wanted to cheer Boruto on, but he knew Boruto would scold him for it.

Konohamaru and Mitsuki remained silent.

Boruto then raised his free hand- before placing it over the rubber ball.

His chakra seemed to change.

As Konohamaru was versed in all four chakra natures, he was able to detect which one was being applied- not insomuch during an actual fight, but within a safe training session it was a simple task.

Lighting..? No.. it's too subtle..

The sensation grew stronger. Then- Boruto's chakra spiked.

The amount of it wasn't unusual.

The density however..

This time, Konohamaru did speak.

"Boruto! This is-" he stepped backward.

Six visible pins of light flashed from within the ball. Then, six lines circled, connecting with each pin. The lines cut through the rubber ball, popping it within an almost soundless shred due to the force.

As the flaps of the ball flew away, a small orb swirled within the hollow sphere Boruto created.

Boruto staggered forward.

He grunted, throwing his arm into the air.

The sphere sparked- particles were drawn to the sphere's swirling core, before filling the orb completely into a-

"Rasengan!?" Konohamaru bellowed.

How is something like this possible..this sort of advancement after struggling with the second stage!

It was then Konohamaru understood. The cycling of Boruto's chakra.. He melded it specifically to become a feedback loop.. Powering his chakra beyond its actual strength.

Not just that. He..then used Lighting and Wind simultaneously! Ionizing the particles in the air and using that ionization to fuel his Rasengan to a complete state!

Konohamaru looked over to Mitsuki. Mitsuki himself said nothing, though his yellow eyes were uncharacteristically wide.

I don't blame Mitsuki, I'm shocked too. To be able to influence positive and negative charges from the atoms in the ai-

Boruto's arm slackened as he began to fall over.

Konohamaru rushed for Boruto, catching him-

The weight of the Rasengan nearly caused Konohamaru to send it straight into Boruto's chest. Konohamaru threw Boruto from himself, then kicked Boruto's elbow straight.

Boruto's Rasengan hit the ground as the boy fully fainted.

There was a flash- followed by a soft churning sound.

Then-

The earth underneath Boruto's Rasengan exploded in a fury of pent up chakra. It tunneled ahead for nearly fifty meters, before tearing up three trees from across the clearing.

Konohamaru and Mitsuki rushed to Boruto, the sound of trees crashing backing them.

"That was.. Ion Release." Konohamaru marveled with a sudden realization.

Mitsuki nodded, looking down at Boruto.

A line of blood trailed from Boruto's nose. His arm was heavily bruised, while moderate cuts, including the almost healed self inflicted one- sliced across a bleeding hand.

Mitsuki walked around Boruto, moving to help Konohamaru lift him.

Konohamaru smiled.

You did it, Boruto. It's a costly jutsu.. but you did it. To bypass the last stages of the Rasengan entirely..

Konohamaru's smile vanished.

Sasuke's visage now lurked into feelings of pride.

Will this be enough for you.. Sasuke Uchiha?

AMADO LEANED over Kashin Koji. The man was in a suspended state, sleeping underneath purple lab light.

The man's body was looking more human, and not at all like a corpse.

Skin and muscle had even grown over the thudding death scroll that had become Kashin's heart by way of Otogane's antichakra jutsu.

Amado sighed, straightening his back with a crack. Turning, Amado retrieved a vial of Jigen's blood.

Despite himself, he felt sweat bead upon his forehead.

This much dread over an action that will take a moment?

Amado placed the vial into a syringe. He returned to Kashin's still slumber. Amado breathed heavily.

His vision seemed to be blurring.

There's no going back.

Amado swallowed heavily. Pausing, the syringe hovered above Kashin's a-

Amado's laboratory door slid open.

His heart froze. Amado cooled himself however, injecting the serum into Kashin with a doctor's flourish.

As the steps grew closer, Amado relaxed.

"I'm starting to think we're becoming friends, Code." Amado chuckled. He faced the red haired youth, who glared back.

The glare was paired with a cruel smile, Code's eyes darting to Kashin.

"I just wanted to see it talk. But you put it under again. Disappointing." Code whined.

Amado placed the medical tools back into a coded compartment. Then, he retrieved a cigarette from a lab coat's breastpocket.

Lighting it, Amado leaned backwards on the interface that kept Kashin contained.

"If he was awake, you'd still be disappointed. He's not saying much." Amado motioned with his vice of choice, smoke following behind red embers.

Code gave him a quizzical look.

"I thought Otogane's jutsu-"

Amado sighed.

"It is able to return abilities.. jutsu. Muscle memory. Hard coded chakra information ingrained into Kashin's body, an impression made by his own existence." Amado took a deep huff of his cigarette.

He exhaled, blowing smoke purposely away from Code. Despite this, Code still spitefully waved a gloved hand about his nose.

"Kashin is missing memories- basic brain functions. Right now, he doesn't even truly understand speech. He does have a brain, but it is somewhat of an organic blank slate. That's where my expertise comes in." Amado clicked a switch on Kashin's console.

"He will be reprogrammed as Kashin Koji, inner within Kara. We've even found him an Outer and Upper." Amado watched as Kashin's fake life was written onto his brain.

Pages of code flashed on the screens of numerous lab equipment diagnostics, signifying the act of rewriting Kashin's very DNA.

Whatever life you lived four hundred years ago.. dies with Otogane Gamou.

Amado chuckled inadvertently.

Though I suppose that's already happened. Damn Makaigan..!

"Don't laugh at yourself. It's creepy." Code snapped.

Amado's glasses shadowed.

"You've no reason to be here anymore. Or did you want an update on your former Upper? According to Delta's last report, she decided to let the kiri nin use her." Amado said almost boredly.

This tactic usually works.

As expected, Code's expression hallowed. Amado could see Code's emotion churn from fear, to embarrassment, then finally subdued rage.

"Botashirin is a monster. Delta has no idea what she's dealing with." Code said harshly.

Amado was surprised. It's not that Code was wrong.. he just had no idea that Code's fear of the woman ran this deep.

Deterred by painful memories, Code made his way from Amado's lab. Amado watched- before narrowing his eyes at Code pausing at the door that hissed open for him.

"Tell me one thing, Amado." Code's words were soft. However..

Amado was surprised.

He's serious.

Amado remained silent. Code turned around expectantly.

After a few moments, the young man frowned.

"I don't know what you're doing with Kashin. But we both know how paranoid Jigen is. Perhaps I could keep a closer eye on you." Code said coolly.

Amado laughed.

"He is paranoid."

Amado smirked at Code, then continued.

"Which means he no doubt already suspects anything you could come up with. Just ask your question. I'll decide if I want to answer it or not. Maybe I'll even be truthful." Amado replied.

Code narrowed his eyes, but when he spoke his glare grew less confident.

"Botashirin.. She's like me. A failed vessel. All six of us inherited parts of Jigen, whatever his whole consists of. I can control fire. Ada is only able to manifest his eye. Botashirin wields his strength, his body.. but she's the one who can use jutsu." Code said. As he spoke, Amado could almost feel the fear that trembled underneath Code's tongue.

Amado understood instantly.

"You want to know Jigen's power." He said quietly.

The lights in the lab blinked.

Code froze for a moment before continuing.

".. based on what Botashirin did.. how she could just.. rip apart whatever you threw at her with that black field.." Code trailed away.

Amado smiled.

"Botashirin is able to use a very rudimentary variation of Jigen's jutsu. You all possess devolved versions of Jigen's overall prowess. Madān was the closest other than Kawaki, objectively.. Then Ada.. then you.." Amado grinned at Code's growing frustration.

"I know how successful we all weren't. I'm surprised by your high opinion of Madān Goro... He is half machine, after all. I just.. I can't imagine how that sort of ability is incomplete." Code looked away, focusing on Kashin's corpse.

Amado dipped cigarette ash into a nearby container.

"Understanding Jigen's ability requires a leap of intuitive thought you may not possess, Code." Amado chuckled at Code's protest, though he quieted as Amado continued.

"Jigen.. controls causality. Or, to put it more simply, the kinetic past and future movement of all physical matter. He can also store these objects within himself, though this is restricted to inanimate material." Amado answered.

Code was quiet for a long time.

"So he can control time?" Code asked, finally.

Amado laughed condescendingly.

"No. Imagine that Jigen came across a home torn apart by a storm just seconds ago. Imagine that his chakra is linked to every single physical object: broken, intact, living, dead- all physical matter in the home. Using the energy of the home's instant destruction, Jigen can shift the causality of it within that same moment.

He could send pieces of wood flying into the sky. He could shoot it into the earth. He could shift the family within, making them move to their safety or demise. Or he could revert it all back into an explosion of pure kinetic energy. If he truly spent his chakra, he could reassemble the house. Though at that point, he would be using a secondary ability, one that also only works on non living subjects."

Code sighed.

"That sounds like time travel. Reverting things back to previous states-"

"It's not. It's energy. causality." Amado answered.

"He's not going back in time to change the matter, he's using kinetic energy to tap into the causality of its predetermined physical reality. In the second of bedlam reeling after a physical outcome.. Jigen's choosing the one he wants, or altering it from a natural course with the kinetic energy gained."

"If it's predetermined, how are there multiple outcomes?" Code pressed.

Amado crossed his arms.

"My my. A smart question from you."

Code frowned.

Amada closed his eyes as he explained.

"Every cause has an effect. When you look at the big picture, that means every action is predetermined by cause. There can be multiple actions as there are multiple variables of causes. All of these probabilities melt down to one event out of millions.. that is causality."

"That... Is Jigen." Amado sighed. For a moment, he was afraid too.

Amado shrugged, continuing. "Earlier I said he could control kinetic past and kinetic future. To put it even more simply, he can view cause and change effect."

Amado met Code's gaze, the young man's eyes growing fearful once more.

"To be able to influence an object to such a degree.."

Amado narrowed his eyes behind thick glasses.

"Object? Jigen's causality affects anything within a 450 meter radius of him."

Code stepped away.

"Scared?" Amado laughed.

"I feel like I know something I shouldn't." Code whispered.

"Don't worry. If Jigen didn't think you should know what I just told you.. I would be dead already." Amado said.

Code remained silent.

"Are they really gods?" He ventured after nearly a minute of silent thought.

"You know the answer to that as well as I do, Code." Amado said with a slack grin, retrieving a second cigarette.

Code simply turned and left- lacking the resolve to even grace Amado with a parting jab.

He finally understands why Jigen's power is so hard to contain. Why he and the others failed.

But.. Jigen's power is his greatest weakness. It takes a toll on him while also making him overconfident.

Amado turned to face Kashin.

He thoughtfully pulled smoke from a flaming cigarette, focusing on the discolored skin of Kashin's stitched arm.

The blood I gave you will do many things, Kashin Koji. A gift for both Kawaki and Jigen.

Amado stared at the body in silence.

22: THE MIZUKAGE- SHADOW AND BLOOD

BORUTO/ALTER

CHOCHO RAN through flames.

The screams of kiri nin dug at her fear- But she couldn't give in to such weakness now.

Chocho adjusted Inojin across a small back, his blood blotting clothing along with pouring rain.

To Chocho's left and right, buildings burned as rogue nin pushed forward, leaping from structure to structure with flashing swords.

In the chaos, none seemed to pay her any attention. The rogue nin kept themselves occupied by breaking into homes, stealing what little goods were to be found-

before killing the families within.

Chocho shut her eyes, tears brimming underneath them as tired legs were forced into a run.

I'm sorry. I have to protect my friend!

It was more than that. Inojin.. Was precious to all of their parents.

Inojin was born with two other siblings. Twins who were killed by their older brother, Khitan.

Chocho didn't know much about the event, but she knew that Shikamaru and Sai were able to fend off Khitan, who then fled the village, becoming a rogue nin.

After all that Inojin and his parents had been through.. Chocho doubled her resolve.

You're definitely not dying here, Inojin!

With that said, Chocho knew that the situation was bad.

The kiri under Nagayasu seemed to be far stronger than those of Chōjūrō. Pain, death, fear- it all howled around her, billowing out of windows as dying screams or rising from bodies of citizens who were trampled to death by their fleeing neighbors.

I have to at least make it back to the medical center.. Even if it's under attack- there's more of a chance there than out here!

Chocho sprinted forward, nimbly kicking away from a body that fell from the buildings above. Chocho ignored the dying man as he unintelligibly pleaded to her, mouth filling with blood as he choked.

Chocho grimaced.

She ran, the Shinobi's eyes haunting her with each pained step.

The medical center was within her gaze now. It was missing its roof, and wicked chakra spat about the air from the top floors.

However.. The main structure itself was intact. Nagayasu's forces seemed to be attacking here as well, but their numbers were far less numerous.

Chocho danced between the shadows of nearby towers. The young Kuonichi paused, waiting for two patrolling rogue nin to drunkenly run through the nearby street, swords covered in blood as they laughed.

Chocho narrowed her eyes, sprinting ahead silently against the light of the bloodied moon.

Chocho leapt in the air, passing through a broken window that led to the building within.

Her skin instantly warmed as lights flickered on. She steadied Inojin, before gathering in darkened surroundings.

The hallway before her was painted with bodies and blood. Random doors were slashed open, while medical equipment was ripped from carefully built interfaces and left in piles beside cooling corpses.

Chocho warily continued. Thus far, she didn't sense anything immediately around her. There was however... some sort of sinister chakra far above. With that said, Chocho knew that at least for now, there was no immediate threat.

She trusted in her sensory skills- Shikadai said she was the best out of all of them-

Shikadai.

She hoped he was okay. It should be fine now, right?- the Kage are here, aren't they?

True panic threatened Chocho's thoughts. It didn't seem as if anyone was alive. And above her.. the distant cackle of violent chakra seemed to press against her senses with a sudden harshness.

I'm.. I'm scared!

Chocho shook her head, tears silently streaming down her face.

I can't be weak now. Not with them depending on me. I have to save Inojin, and I have to make sure someone is there to go back and find Shikadai!

She ran once more, resilient to the splashes of blood that sprayed from the stomp of her sandals.

Room after room was empty, devoid of life or working medical tools. Chocho steadily made her way through floor after floor, until finally-

The sound of swords clashing together filled Chocho's ears.

It's coming from the floor right above me!

Chocho began to run-

She paused, turning before placing Inojin down.

Inojin was still unconscious, and bleeding heavily. Chocho sighed, swallowing rising despair as she used rudimentary medical jutsu.

She simply transferred more chakra to his body's natural healing- it wouldn't heal him enough to fully ensure his safety, but it would help Inojin's blood continue to clot and circulate as opposed to bleeding out.

Chocho rose, gripping her sword.

"This would be a lot easier if you were awake. Who's annoying now?" Chocho smiled sadly.

I feel like something bad is about to happen.

A violent exchange of blows, followed by a scream, brought Chocho to a ducked run. She drew her tantō, chakra running through the edge of the weapon's blade.

Chocho followed the sounds of further battle, zipping across a flight of stairs until-

A body hurtled straight for Chocho. She spun out of the way, blood flying across her face. The body crashed against a wall behind her with fleshly slop-

A shadow was upon Chocho in the next moment.

Though it was not one that carried the sense of killing intent.

Chocho lowered her weapon, raising eyes to the shadow above her at the same time.

It was a boy who looked to be the same age as Chocho. The bottom of his mouth was tightly wrapped in white bandages, while spiked black hair fell over a kiri headband. He carried a massive blade that was forked into two tongues, but Chocho noticed he also carried a smaller sword, one that seemed to not belong to him.

Smart. That greatsword isn't the best weapon to use in tight spaces like these. I can see why he's alive, at least.

"I saw your konoha headband-" The boy began.

Chocho glared at him.

"There's no time to really explain. I have one wounded genin with me, and another back in the city. What's the situation like here? Where are the Kage? Moegi.. Mugino..!" Chocho spoke hurriedly as she raced back to Inojin, the kiri boy following behind her.

"I don't know those other names.. but the Kage are fighting whatever is above us. I'm sure you've felt it by now.. that chakra." The young kiri nin said, running beside Chocho.

Chocho's eyes threatened to water. Once more, she shut them, focusing now on Inojin as the pair turned into the stairway hall.

"He's-!" The kiri nin's voice rose in alarm.

The boy slid for Inojin, coming upon Chocho's teammate and placing down both swords.

"He's.. I don't know how much more time he has left." Chocho rasped.

The dark haired youth looked up at Chocho, before silently turning his attention back to Inojin's heaving, bloody wound.

"You're in luck. The Mizukage left behind his second in command of sorts- Kagura Karatachi. I don't know much about him- but he's a jonin. And he knows medical jutsu." The boy's eyes met Chocho's once more.

"Though your friend's injuries are serious. I'll be honest with you.. he still could die." the youth spoke, gathering up Inojin.

"I'll lead the way. Let's hurry."

MEI PROPELLED herself backwards upon a jet of water.

Shih Kango chuckled with dim humor. His light violet skin seemed to shine in the light of the moon-

Shih was beside Mei in mere seconds, erupting from a shard of ice by her foot.

Those damn mirrors! They're everywhere!

Mei lowered to the cracked floor below, closing her eyes inadvertently as Shih's broadsword passed overhead.

Chōjūrō.. he isn't keeping up..!

"Stay focused.. Fifth Mizukage!" Shih hissed as he lifted his weapon-

Before vanishing into one of a thousand mirrors.

"Chōjūrō! I need your help!" Mei shouted. She skipped back, rain pressing red hair against a bloodied forehead.

Shih..I've never actually fought him. He truly is as strong as they say...

Mei stopped just short of Chōjūrō's kneeling stance. Blood poured from numerous wounds that crawled across the Sixth Mizukage's body.

Shih had toyed with Chōjūrō- and spat him out.

"He's.. he's too fast…!" Chōjūrō hissed, blood trailing down both sides of his sharp toothed frown.

Shih suddenly reappeared from above.

"Ice Release: Singing Rapture!

Several of Shih's mirrors formed together in the air around him, churning into snowing, spinning rectangles of frozen glass.

Mei gathered Chōjūrō by the shoulder, the Sixth Mizukage lazily dragging his broadsword behind.

Mei propelled herself and Chōjūrō away with a stream of water-

Just as thousands of ice needles shot from each of the mirrors, exploding into a fine mist as they cut into the ground only seconds off target.

Shih fell from the air, ice mirrors above him cracking into further needles-

Then hurtling for both Mizukage.

Damn it!

Mei cusped both hands together.

"Water Style: Water Wall!" Chakra filled Mei's voice as water boomed in reprisal. A torrent of blue rose to the defense of Mei and Chōjūrō, absorbing Shih's ice in an advancing tsunami.

Mei turned to Chōjūrō in the seconds she bought them.

"Get it together, Mizukage! Remember who you are!" Mei spoke as Chōjūrō shakily straightened his stance. Blood spurting from his mouth, eyes glaring forward behind faded goggles.

"I know..!" Chōjūrō suddenly rushed ahead, meeting Shih as the latter lurked between a slash that parted Mei's water.

Their swords crossed with rumbling strikes, Shih's quiet smile growing wider.

Chōjūrō disengaged for a moment, chakra screeching from his weapon.

He fashioned the chakra into a massive warhammer-

Then spun for Shih.

Shih narrowed his eyes, raising zabuza's sword-

Mei danced from behind the Swordsman.

Now it's our turn!

Mei flashed fingers together, forming jutsu signs faster than the human eye could track.

"Water Style: Dragon's Gaze!" Mei shouted as rings of water formed around both her and Shih.

The rings harmlessly passed Mei..

Focusing instead on Nagayasu's warrior. Mei's jutsu wrapped around Shih, keeping liquid form while somehow constricting into malleable rivers of water.

Chōjūrō's hammer hurtled into Shih.

Chōjūrō narrowed his eyes-

A crack was heard, smoke billowing from Shih's quivering body..

Before it fell to the ground as a shattered statue of ice.

Shih silently flashed to Chōjūrō's left.

He was close to the ground, Zabuza's sword held at his waist. He knifed the cleaver for Chōjūrō's legs-

Chōjūrō leapt over the strike, stabbing his own sword downward.

Shih rolled to the right, laughing as Chōjūrō's blade met nothing but ruined floor and stone.

Shih kicked Zabuza's sword back into the air, spinning before hurling the massive blade downwards for Chōjūrō's head.

Chōjūrō stood perfectly still, narrowly evading the attack and smiling at Shih's bewildered gaze.

Chōjūrō then cut past the Swordsman in the very next second, sword held high.

Shih fell to one knee, blood flying from his chest.

Chōjūrō..! Mei rushed forward, smirking.

This is just what we needed!

Mei summoned all the chakra she possessed.

I'll end this with my next jutsu!

Chōjūrō turned just as Shih chuckled to his full height.

"Finally coming alive… Chōjūrō?!" Shih blitzed into a speck of air-

Smoke gathered around Chōjūrō before Shih himself exploded into life. The Swordsman assailed Chōjūrō with a relentless assault-

Their swords cried aloud, steels clanging together. Both Shih and Chōjūrō had twisted smiles on their faces, blood flying from each grin.

Keep him right there, Chōjūrō!

Mei clapped palms together.

"Boil Release: Concussive World!" Mei shouted.

Shih faltered, broken out of his trance with Chōjūrō as the weight of Mei's chakra suddenly hit him.

"Get back, Chōjūrō!" Mei shouted. Chōjūrō zipped to safety-

Shih moved to intercept, before being halted by a superheated fog that burned his purple skin.

"What.. is this?!" Shih whispered in quiet horror. He attempted to flee into one of his mirrors-

But they melted before he could enter them.

At the same time, a screen of water formed around Shih, keeping him restricted within an orb of burning mist.

Mei then closed her fingers into each other-

The orb sharply shrunk.

Shih's voice erupted in a howling, shrieking yelp. The orb filled with red haze as the sound of skin sizzling could be heard in muted tones.

Mei smiled.

That should-

The orb exploded in chakra. Eyes glowed darkly from within rising smoke.

Shih hunched over, but inexplicably and resolutely stood on his feet, Zabuza's blade held across raw and bleeding shoulders. Shih's skin was boiled- bits of it hung off, while lesions formed across his chest and arms. Parts of his face now bore exposed bone, fleshy flaps hanging from deranged and skeletal eyes.

How is he still-

Chōjūrō broke the dissipating smoke behind Shih. The Sixth Mizukage swung into a bisecting slash-

Shih, despite his wounds, turned instantly to meet Chōjūrō.

He saw him.. how?!

Mei leapt into the fray.

I'm no good at close range.. but!

Mei spouted a stream of lava from her mouth just as Shih's cleaving strike knocked Chōjūrō off balance.

Shih glared at Mei, evaporating into his mirrors as they rose from the floor.

His shadow danced about them-

Mei felt the kiss of air meet her neck.

This speed-

Just as Mei felt Shih's weight begin to press into the edge of her throat.

Chōjūrō was beside her.

A rush of chakra pushed Mei slightly away from the Swordsmen-

Mei threw her head upwards, screaming Chōjūrō's name, red hair billowing across a panicked face.

Chōjūrō blocked Zabuza's blade with Hirameikarei, struggling underneath Shih's strength.

Mei rebounded upon a nearby jutting stone- she pounced upon Shih, covering her fists with lava.

A mirror sprung up from the floor, tripling in size as it chased Mei's falling fists, meeting them with harmless hisses.

Chōjūrō roared.

Mei looked up, surprised by the chakra that rose from the timid Kage. Chōjūrō reversed his grip on Hirameikarei's dual handle, then pulled the sword backwards, disarming Shih while slicing off one of his arms.

Mei gasped-

Chōjūrō didn't falter. In the same swipe, he rotated his swing back around with hidden speed and strength- overcoming Shih's own ability for the first time during their battle.

Hirameikarei blurred into a crescent of moveme-

A spear of ice leapt from Shih's remaining palm. It punctured Chōjūrō through his left eye, blood instantly rushing from the wound as Chōjūrō's movements went limp.

Mei's vision seemed as if it was being obstructed by blackness.

Tears streamed behind Mei's eyes as they contorted in disbelief and rage.

Chōjūrō stepped backwards, breaking away a part of Shih's ice with him. He stumbled about for a few moments, before finally falling to his knees, then to his back.

Chōjūrō's chest went still.

"Ch-..Chōjūrō!" Mei screamed.

"…you..!" Mei snarled into a run, chakra screeching about her.

Shih dashed away-

He's slower, but he's still faster than I am!

"Running away?! What's wrong?! I should be easy for you to kill now, Shih!" Mei's voice bellowed in the thunderous night.

Shih turned, standing upon a lone column of stone that once belonged to a domed roof.

"We've fulfilled our objective…" Shih reached into his cloth belt, producing some sort of flare.

He rose a burned arm into the air, firing the flare as it exploded in white light across thundering clouds that threatened the moon.

Retreat? But-

Shih regarded Mei with cruel humor as she climbed to reach him.

"You're weak, Mizukage. Nagayasu ordered that you.. are to be spared. Though don't worry. Next time we meet.. I'll be sure to return in kind." Shih whispered.

He formed a series of jutsu signs with his remaining arm-

Before vanishing within the sound of beating rain.

Mei didn't waste another thought.

She spun, rushing to Chōjūrō.

Mei knelt beside him, cradling his head as tears freely fell upon Chōjūrō's bloodied body.

I'm so sorry.. Chōjūrō..!

TSUNADE SOMERSAULTED BACKWARDS. A long ponytail danced behind honed movements aged by precise chakra control.

Botashirin laughed, her voice growing higher and more childlike.

"You can get stronger! You can!" Botashirin applauded.

Tsunade landed upright, sliding backwards as Botashirin rushed to greet her.

Tsunade ducked into a crouch, rolling to the right as Botashirin ripped her first through the air.

"Ho..?" Botashirin hissed coyly, crouching herself lower to the ground.

Tsunade kept moving. From her roll, she rose into a circling run. She pumped chakra through aging muscles-

Tsunade charged for Botashirin-

Botashirin formed a jutsu sign with both hands.

Tsunade felt as if she were blind for a moment.

Chakra overwhelmed her senses.

All she could perceive was Botashirin.. and the black, snaking heads of chakra that sprouted from her. The blackness seemed to be inhabited by some sort of static, and the chakra itself was fashioned into the shape of a female hydra, each face complete with wavering purple locks.

"Come now," Botashirin smiled as Tsunade's senses returned.

The apparition that curled around Botashirin vanished.

But Tsunade could still feel it.

"Don't stop now." Botashirin's playfulness had been replaced by a strange, alien intellect.

She stepped forward-

Before a bang split Tsunade's ears.

A shock of light filled Tsunade's vision. She couldn't see for a moment, but she could hear-

And the sound she heard was Botashirin laughing.

"More! More!" Botashirin cheered.

Tsunade's vision slowly returned.

[newtonsheffield]

Hey Molly. Loving the Little Women AU. Do you plan on writing a few more chapters?

I plan on writing one more at least...

Part 1 Part 2

"Yes. Tell me you want me to love you, and I promise, Kate, I'll do it for the rest of my life."

Kate couldn't breathe. Surely there was no air left in the room, none in the entire world but that which left his chest and went into hers. Anthony was standing pressed against her, his hands resting lightly on her waist, his forehead pressed against hers, and she couldn't breathe.

She hadn't thought to find him in the library, when she'd snuck away as she always did to pluck a book from the shelves to get lost in later. In fact: she'd been trying her level best to avoid him since she'd stood in front of the entire county with two men staring at her, expecting and answer. How could she face him, truly, when she hadn't even expected her own answer?

Mary had stared at her, in shock that evening sat in their drawing room, her embroidery held in front of her, Edwina reading in her room while Kate just sat. Half in shock herself.

"I'm sorry, Mama. I know I ought to have said yes but I-"

Mary had shaken her head, "My Darling I never would have pressed you in his direction if I did not think you returned his interest. I am the last person who should want you to marry for obligation."

And it had welled in her chest just like the tears in her eyes, "I wanted to- I told Anthony that I would but then he was looking at me and I-"

"You love him." Mary said gently, a look of understanding etched on her face, her arms wrapping gently around her.

And Kate spoke it aloud for the first time, "I love Anthony. And it will do no good."

But here he was now, his eyes begging her to tell him to love her, and she couldn't say anything.

"You would love me Because I asked it of you?"

Anthony shook his head fiercely, his eyes still pressed closed "I would love you, all my life because it is what I will do anyway." His eyes flew to hers, Her lips parted in surprise struggling for words but He shook his head. "Please, Kate. Please just listen and then I will never speak another word on the matter if it is not what you want."

Anthony took a shuddering breath, as though steeling himself for the moment to come, standing so close his lips brushed hers with every word. "I have loved you, Kate, long before I knew what love was and I will love you long after I am able. Our mother's believed I held affection for your sister but I only ever felt it with regards to how her happiness reflected your own. I tried, I tried to forget my own feelings as I was sure they were not returned but I can do so no longer." He took her hand in his intertwining their fingers and pressing it over his heart, the steady rhythm in time with her own.

"You have admonished me, and lectured me, and I deserve every scornful word you've ever spoken. I have not been a great man, Kate, but I will be. I can offer you comfort, security for your family, but most of all I offer myself. It is not much but everything I have and am, everything I ever will be will be: is yours."

Tears were stinging at her eyes as silence swelled around them, her mind screaming at her as Anthony's lips ticked upwards in that smirk that had always set her heart racing.

"This is where you accept my proposal, or hit me over the head."

Incredulous laughter broke free of her chest, her heart pounding just for him as they stayed pressed together, her body shuffling closer of its own accord. "Was that a proposal? You've asked me no questions."

Anthony looked incredulous, rolling his eyes. "Must you be vexatious, even now?"

"Yes."

His eyes were shining at her, his arms holding her impossibly closer, "Marry me, Kate. Elope with me. Runaway with me, and then we'll come back here and I'll be a man you could be proud to call your husband. I can't spend any longer without you as my wife, for in my heart you are already."

"That still wasn't a question." Kate gasped but she leaned forward anyway, her lips finding his in a swirl of heady emotion, moving together desperately, tears mingling on their cheeks, heart pounding together, gripping one another so tightly, Kate could never tell where he ended and she began.

"And that wasn't an answer."

"Kate, Mama wants-Oh!" The door flew open, Edwina's voice carrying through with the noise from their family outside, cutting off in a sharp gasp at the sight of the two of them, locked together. Kate planted her hands on his chest, attempting to scurry away but Anthony held firm, looking towards her younger sister, his charming grin etched on his face.

"Edwina! Lovely! Please inform your mother that my bride and I are leaving for Scotland in about... twenty minutes. That should be enough time to prepare the carriage."

[peachyysugaa]

troublemaker

― dancer youtubers!lee heeseung x gn!dance major!reader

sparks fly when the top two dancers on youtube collab!

genre: slow-burn fluff, s2l

wc: 3.9k (omg i'm sorry) + 2 twitter pics

warnings: probably some wrong dance terminology, slightly suggestive (the dance is just 😳), short timeskip, it's cheesy please bear with me

part of my youtuber enhypen series, the fifth upload! feel free to read on its own~ ♞──────────────────────────♞

you finish off your last move with your arms wide open, your chest heaving up and down from lack of breath. smiling nevertheless, you know you absolutely love the feeling of getting your breath taken away after dancing because you know it meant you did your best. you walk towards the camera lens and peek at the comments through your open laptop.

"did you all enjoy that?" you ask breathlessly grinning. the flooding comments are filled with compliments from your cover of nct u's boss. however, one comment, in particular, caught your eye as others seemed to reply to it.

heeseung ✔ 2s ago wow that was amazing do you wanna do a collab sometime? 😊

line break insurance you've failed me 5x already

your eyes widen as you let out a gasp. "is that the lee heeseung?" you accidentally say out loud. you wince at the realization of your mistake. the comments are both praising you for your success in getting noticed by the other top dancer on youtuber and relating to your remark.

heeseung ✔ 3s ago haha yes it's me dm me if you want to hear more about it 🤍

"oh wow... this is really cool..." you state before blinking to get you out of your stupor. "well everyone, that's going to be all for y/n's motion of dance today! thank you so much for tuning in, love you!"

you wave goodbye for a few more moments and then shut off the broadcast, closing your laptop as soon as you do. you blink twice and suddenly let out a scream.

you stop with a gasp and cover your mouth with your hands because you cannot believe you forgot that your dance studio isn't the most soundproof of places. "sorry, other dance students..." you whisper to them but more for yourself.

taking a look around your escape, your passion, you can't believe you've made it to where you are, being praised as one of the top dancers on such a vast social media platform like youtube. if anything, you guess it runs in your family, after all, you are related to choi yeonjun, who is considered 4th gen's it boy.

though people were skeptical of you at first when you came on the youtube scene as a dancer after your older brother started taking more to modeling and acting, you quickly proved them wrong by showing them your talent and bloomed from then on. of course, you can't forget to mention the person who skyrocketed just around the same time as you.

and that was the aforementioned lee heeseung. you sigh as you finish packing up your clothes and things to head back to your dorm, glancing out the window to see the sun beginning to set. it seems today was a rare early finish for you.

"i could go for a coffee... i need to finish my classics essay anyway," you mumble to yourself, throwing your bag over your shoulder before hitting the showers and changing into a more casual set of clothes. the finishing touch is a baseball cap that sits snug on your head. tightening the strap on the back and grabbing your backpack and dance bag, you finally take your leave of your beloved dance studio and return the key on the way out. fresh air meets your face, allowing you to take a whiff of the cherry blossoms that have been blooming for a month or so as you make your way to the campus café.

ding ding, the coffee shop's calm doorbell welcomes you as your nose is hit by the sweet smells of freshly ground coffee beans. "welcome!" one of the servers calls at the counter, smiling at your figure that walks closer to order. "what can i get you?"

"hi, may i have..." you scan the menu quickly for a familiar drink. "a honey cinnamon iced latte please?"

"of course, name please?"

"choi y/n," you reply.

if they recognize you, they don't make any notion of it, simply scribbling your name on the plastic cup as you make your payment. you're grateful for the normal interaction and the peacefulness of the café, especially after a surprising stream. "i'll call you when your order's ready, choi y/n-ssi," they inform you with a warm grin.

"thank you," you smile back before going to find a seat. spotting a relatively private area close by with only a pair of boys sitting at the booth, you decide to take the booth two spaces away from them. one boy, you notice, sits taller than the other, but his face is covered by a baseball cap. the other looks like a freshman, his cheeks accentuated by a pair of deep dimples.

as you take your seat, you can't help but think the boy with dimples looks rather familiar but can't seem to place your finger on it. shrugging, you simply begin preparing to write your essay by taking out your laptop and notes from your classics ge. the moment you finish is when you hear your name being called.

"choi y/n-ssi, your honey cinnamon iced latte," the server's voice calls. on your way to receive your awaiting drink, you can finally hear the voices of the two boys sitting two booths down from you.

"did your crush just say choi y/n?" the one with the hat says.

'yes, that's me,' you think to yourself nonchalantly.

"weren't you just watching their stream, heeseung hyung?" another voice says as you pick up your latte and thank the server.

wait, heeseung? as in lee heeseung? it's when you turn around with your drink in hand that you notice the two males looking straight at you. now you're able to make out the features of the boy with the cap, and there's no mistaking it.

"lee heeseung?" you mutter out loud at the same time he speaks out yours.

well, maybe that wasn't what you were expecting today, but hey, life is full of surprises, even if they are one after the other for you. after that unexpected encounter, you and heeseung acquainted yourselves, he invited you to sit with them, and now you're sitting at their table, awkwardly sipping on your latte.

"right, so should i leave?" the other boy, who you found out is studytuber and vlogger yang jungwon (which is why he looked familiar to you), blurts out. you chuckle as heeseung shakes his shoulder lightly. "what? you two clearly have to talk about something, i need to study."

"yea, yea, lover boy. make sure you say bye to your crush on the way out," the male dancer teases, causing the younger one to turn bright red.

"don't call me that, hyung," he mutters before picking up his bag and leaving the booth. sure enough, you watch as jungwon passes by the counter and erupts into a nervous mess the moment the server beams at him.

"ah... so he likes them?" you think out loud.

"yup, it's been almost four months now. i'm the reason he even knows this cafe and that server exists," heeseung mentions, making you nod courteously. he turns his attention back to you with his hand placed under his chin. "but their relationship is besides the point. let's talk about us."

"d-did you have to put it that way?" the forwardness catches you off-guard, and you suddenly have a harder time swallowing a sip of your coffee.

"sorry," he says with a teasing smile. "i just think the collab i mentioned would be good for both of us, and it'll be really fun too."

"i agree, people who like you will come to me and vice versa," you nod. "but do you know what we would be dancing to?"

"so does that mean you're in?" he asks, smile starting to grow on his face. wordlessly, you roll your eyes and hold out your hand for him to shake. that's when his full smile comes out, causing your cheeks to heat up as you think about how much more handsome it makes him look. taking your hand, heeseung shakes it with his vigorously. "alright, dance partner, we have a deal."

after much deliberation and research, the two of you finally agree on troublemaker by the duo hyuna and hyunseung. heeseung suggested this song, stating that he always wanted to do the choreo with somebody and that it's destiny that both males have a name that starts with h and ends with seung. quite frankly, it's not like you could find much anyway, besides some cool music bank mc stages, it is cool that troublemaker was originally an opposite-gender duo in the korean entertainment industry.

the choreography however is an entirely different story. at many points, hyuna's body is touched by hyunseung and vice versa, but if they can do it and stay professional, then you believe you can too. besides, dancing will always be just dancing. heeseung also assures you that if you want, the two of you can just have your hands hovering, which makes you feel relieved to have an understanding partner.

hours pass by, and you and heeseung decide to meet at your usual dance studio daily after all your classes, which wasn't hard because he also frequented the same one.

"i still can't believe we attend the same university," you say aloud as the both of you pack up your laptops and supplies.

"i know right, you would think one of us would recognize the dance studio we go to 24/7, right?" he laughs. "although, i've seen you use a different one sometimes."

"do you really watch my covers and streams often?" you ask baffled. he and you wave the workers goodbye and make your way to the brisk evening air waiting outside as the staff sends you off.

"i do, is that so hard to believe?"

"a little," you reply sheepishly.

"well, let me walk you to your dorm and prove to you how much of a choi y/n stan i am," he boasts, and you let yourself laugh freely as you walk beside him to your destination.

it's strange, knowing a famous youtuber you watched also knew and followed you, but then again, you're not exactly nobody either. when heeseung drops you off, he admits that he actually lives a few floors above you and that you two can walk home together after each rehearsal. it's even stranger, knowing a famous youtuber literally has been on your campus, in the same dorm building as you, and this whole time, the two of you have both been clueless as to the other's existence as an ordinary college student.

speaking of which, he can't be a dance major, right? otherwise, you would've already seen him! these thoughts keep you tossing and turning to the point you don't register when you fell asleep. when you wake up, you feel as if you didn't get any sleep at all, but get up and ready nevertheless, going through another regular day as a dance major.

by the time your classes are over, you walk out of the studio yawning about to stop by your dorm to freshen up and maybe fit in a nap. you're holding a hand over your mouth mid-yawn when a voice starts talking to you.

"good thing i stopped by to get coffee." you open your eyes and close your mouth to see lee heeseung holding two cups of coffee. he's dressed in an oversized white shirt and grey sweatpants, a common dance practice outfit, so why is your heart skipping so many beats. "yo, choi y/n."

"heeseung," you say, still shocked. he hands you the coffee, which is actually the same flavor you got yesterday. "thanks."

"no problem," he replies coolly. "maybe we should take a break before we get to it?"

"i'll be fine, how about we can start watching the choreo?"

"they're always ready to dance," he nods with an impressed smile. "as expected of a dance major."

the two of you walk inside and book a studio for a few hours as you raise an eyebrow at him. "wait, what major are you?"

"music production."

"that makes so much sense!" you say relieved, stepping into the studio room for the umpteenth time. "i was racking my brains wondering what major you were."

"so the famous choi y/n is curious about me?" he smirks. you groan and facepalm in response. "i'm kidding, i'm kidding. let's watch the video on my tablet?"

nodding, the two of you watch carefully, eyes glued to the screen at your respective roles. you hold your breath at some touchy parts but also notice that both idols were able to shine in their solos.

"a few tweaks here and there, and it'll be perfect," heeseung comments once the video is over. "but let's go over some boundaries, yeah? let me know what you're comfortable with and what you're not."

"right," you agree, once again relieved to have such a safe and understanding partner like him. "well, i think i'm okay with you touching my arms, shoulders, and hips like hyunseung did to hyuna. i just need some time to get used to it."

"alright, that sounds good," he says nodding with a hand under his chin. "then for today, i'll just hover my hands over the places they need to be."

"what a gentleman," you tease.

he rolls his eyes playfully at you. "let's start marking."

and so that's what the two of you start on. with the video on the tablet, you go through the motions with the speed lowered, eventually picking up more moves until you're able to follow at the normal speed. as expected of the top two dancers on youtube, the two of you are quick on observing and learning the dance and get done with basic marking within 20 minutes or so.

after marking, you take a quick water break to watch the video again in full detail, officially beginning your first real practice. as promised, throughout the entirety of marking, heeseung has kept his hands to himself, but you've become comfortable enough to have him do a little more.

before you start practicing for real, you decide to speak with him. "hee," you call him as he puts down his water bottle.

"hm?" he confirms that you have his attention, looking up with his large doe-like eyes while wiping his mouth off from some excess water.

"uhm.." you fidget with your top a little before mustering up some courage. "you can do light touches now for the choreo."

"really? are you sure?" you nod at his question, causing him to come up to you and ruffle your hair lightly. you bat his hands away with a pout, smoothing out the mess he made as he laughs at you. "that's great, y/n," he says with a bright smile, unknowingly making your heart beat a little faster as you nod again. in your head, you rush to cover up the physical reaction with an excuse that it's just from the amount of exercise you've done.

the two of you stand in front of the mirror, ready to go. before the music starts, heeseung turns to you and says, "just let me know if i make you uncomfortable at all."

"i'll be fine," you reassure him with a small smile. that's when the song begins, and the sparks start to fly. every move flowed like water, yet every touch between the two of you was like electricity as if the two elements were working together instead of fighting. even though the touches are light, they still put chills up your spine, in a way that you can only describe with the phrase "meant to happen."

was fate moving its course to put this match together, or were you imagining it? you're not sure, but you grin while catching your breath once the first practice is over. falling to the floor softly, you sit with your hands splayed behind you and let out a relieved sigh. "ahh... dancing is so... great!"

heeseung chuckles at your reaction and offers a hand to get you up. "i'm glad you think that because we got a lot more practice ahead of us, partner."

"yup!" you say with a widening smile. the moment you took his hand, you felt an electric jolt that almost made you let go. getting up, you shake it off and barely catch the expression on your dance partner's face. "is something the matter?"

he blinks a bit before he's shaking his head with that charming smirk of his. "nope! let's practice!"

practice, practice, practice. that's how the next few hours go. and just like the day before, heeseung walks you to your dorm building, this time the conversation about how excited the two of you are for the recording.

that's basically how the next four or so days go, now that heeseung came into your life. your daily routine of wake up, eat, class, dance, repeat was shaken by him, because now he was a part of it. it's an indescribable feeling, hanging out with him. the best word, or phrase actually, is the same one you used while dancing with him: meant to be.

so when you finally get to the day of recording, you almost don't want it to end. at least, that's what you're telling your best friend and makeup artist, kim sunoo.

"friend, you're telling me that you and this guy have been following along to..." he tells you to look up as he curls your eyelashes. "a dance like that for four days and you've been getting shocks this whole time?"

"i mean, yeah?"

"y/n, i love you, but you're missing a little something, aren't you?"

"wha-!?"

"pucker up, sweetie, we're making your lips look kissable," sunoo commands. you do an eye-roll but do as he says. "if you don't ask him out or do something by the end of this, you can at least kiss your best shot at a boyfriend goodbye with luscious lips."

he finishes applying the color and asks you to rub your lips together and make that pop sound. "perfect," your best friend compliments. "go out there and get your mans."

"thank you, sunoo!" you say, gazing at your reflection in the mirror and loving the way he accentuated your features. "by the way, you're all talk. you should ask your celebrity crush out when they appear on your channel."

"i'll get there when i get there!" he whines and starts pushing you out of his dorm room. "just go get 'em, tiger."

with that, you make your way to the dance studio where heeseung is waiting for you, dressed in hyunseung's iconic suit with the leopard-patterned blazer. your heart quickens, seeing how much more handsome he looks dressed up, hair slicked back and some makeup done. he looks up upon hearing the door open and his mouth slightly hangs open as well.

the both of you are silent as you approach him, in your equally bedazzling outfit, sheer to mimic hyuna's stage dress. "you look amazing," the two of you say at the same time. stunned at the simultaneous sentence, you two immediately start guffawing at how this was unlike your usual interactions.

"that was so awkward!" you blurt out, unable to contain your laughter.

"yea, not like us at all," he admits while he wipes a stray tear from laughing too hard away. smiling at each other, you admire the way his eyes reflect your image and sparkle. "you ready to get this show on the road."

"ready as i'll ever be." the two of you get into your positions on the opposite ends of the room, and heeseung starts the camera and the music soon after. you take each step slowly to meet him in the middle as he takes your hand and brings it up to his lips to give it a kiss while smirking. you keep your face professional as the two of you take a few steps forward, the back of his fingers curled over the front of yours.

starting back-to-back, you walk forward a bit before the beat drops and heeseung's part begins. you're on autopilot as you dance your fingers from his chest to his shoulders, and then the chorus comes. hips swaying, you're able to feel his hands' light taps on your body as the two of you lose yourself to the music you've danced to hundreds of times this week.

then, it's your killing part as you lipsync hyuna's rap and take bold steps around heeseung's body, ending up behind him to bring your hands over his shoulders and make a scratching movement across his chest. you step towards his side, do your thing, and walk away as if playing hard to get.

you wait for his part during the bridge and make a side glance towards him before moving towards him and performing the hip-heavy part of the chorus together. your partner moves his face up along your arm, taking it in like you're a statue. you then act like you brush him away when heeseung gets close enough. after this second chorus, you're leaving him to do his big solo, watching carefully as he makes his every move precise and crisp yet flow well.

it's the last chorus now, and this time, you can't take your eyes off each other as you finally face one another. you stay drowning in his shades of brown without a single misstep until you have to walk away from him. you wait for him to come towards you, back slightly turned away as he jaunts forward, making his way to be captured by your hand behind his neck.

the last breath of the song is the one where you're supposed to turn your head away as his own chases yours, but this time, you brave forward and lean in close. the music fades away, but all you hear is his breathing, feeling it against your own.

you stay like this, ensnared in each other's arms, forgetting about everything except the person wrapped close to you as you feel his every breath against your lips and every inhale and exhale under your hand. he searches your eyes, looking for some kind of sign. "do you mind if i—"

that was all you needed before you're pressing your lips against his. it only takes seconds for him to kiss you back, moving his hands from their previous position on your hips to hold your face. becoming breathless from dancing was one thing, becoming breathless from kissing heeseung was another thing entirely, it was in a league of its own you note as you pull away and rest your forehead on his.

"we'll have to edit that out," you say after what seemed like ages of taking each other in while chuckling.

"i have a better idea than editing."

"oh, and what's that, handsome?"

"look at you getting all bold, troublemaker," heeseung replies with that smile of his. he shakes his head, moving away from you and taking your hand in his. "how about we go on our first official date as youtube's top dancer couple?"

"that does sound like a better idea," you agree, your own smile widening.

"then let's make it happen, sweetheart."

bonus! - click for full images

taglist: @cha-raena @imjustme-things @misoiishi @rikitaiyaki send an ask to join the taglist! :3c permanent taglist: @fiantomartell

a/n: wow this was a long one!! i'm not sure if i detailed all the movements well, but i hope you all enjoyed it nevertheless <3

[xxblackballoonxx]

The Heart Underneath: J&M Letters 2 (Ch. 18)

***This fic is being posted simultaneously on FanFiction.net and Ao3. I originally began it in 2016, and then life was life, and now I’m bringing it back because it deserves to be finished! Rating M as of Chapter 10 ***

Chapter 17: March 1915 Part 2 Chapter 19: August 1915 Full story here

John as a dad kills me, I can't take it.

The Heart Underneath

Chapter 18: J&M Letters 2 (18 and 20)

15 May 1915

Dear John,

Our son William Michael Shelby was born this morning around 7 AM and came into the world healthy and screaming his little lungs out. He looks like you already, with the most beautiful blue eyes. Polly said babies eyes are often blue at birth, but they’re so like yours, I don’t think they’ll change much.

It was about as terrifying as I thought it would be and fortunately we had time for Polly to call for a midwife. Ada is sufficiently traumatized, I don’t think her and Freddie will be spending that kind of time together for quite awhile. Poor Finn spent all night hiding in his bed to get away from the noise.

I wish you had been able to be here, I cannot wait for you to meet your son. I’ve known for a long time that you would be a great father. It’s sooner than we had planned for, but we’re ready for this, I know we can do it.

I’m writing this in bed, had to practically beg Pol for something to write on so I could get this to you right away. Will is sleeping in our room for now, eventually he’ll go in Tommy’s old room. I feel closer to you, having him in my arms. A part of you that I can touch, and see, and take care of.

Please stay safe, Will needs his daddy. He needs his uncles, too. And I need you to come back to us, love. We need all of you to come back.

We love you always,

Mar and Will 

John wiped tears from his eyes at he smiled down at Martha’s letter.  He knew she was strong enough to handle giving birth without him there, but he would’ve given anything to be home that very moment.  To see his son, to see his wife, hold them close. To watch them sleep and make sure they were safe.

He took a few minutes to compose himself, trying to focus on the happy news of his son being born and not the sadness he felt over not being there. Focus on the fact that both loves of his life had come through unscathed and were safe and well at home.

Finally he got up from his corner of the trench they'd been in for days and wandered down the line to where there was a small group of soldiers in front of a fire, waiting for a kettle to boil.  Arthur caught John’s eye and pulled Tommy with him to meet John halfway.

“Martha had the baby, a boy. We named him Will.” John told them, grinning at how it felt to say the words aloud.

“Congratulations, John boy!” Arthur shouted pulled his brother into a tight hug.

“Congratulations, John! Boys, gather round, we’ve got something to celebrate, my brother just became a father for the first time!” Tommy yelled out.

The soldiers around them cheered and patted John on the back.  Tommy pulled out a flask of whiskey from his pocket and held it in the air.

“To John, to his wife Martha, to his new son Will. May the new generation of Shelbys prosper and never experience the hell we have.” Tommy said solemnly.

A quiet wave of agreement passed over the small crowd, as Tommy drank and passed the flask to John. John took a long swallow, letting the alcohol burn down and ease some of the ache he felt. He took a second sip and then passed it on to Arthur.

“To my nephew Will Shelby!” Arthur yelled out and the crowd cheered once more.

John smiled again and Tommy rubbed the back of his head affectionately, smiling back at him. Little did John know that the news cemented Tommy and Arthur’s pact even further. John had to return back to England alive and well. There was no question now, no other option. His family needed him.

23 May 1915

Dear Mar,

I’m so proud of you, love. Thank you for bringing our son into the world safely and I know he’s in the best care with you. I can’t wait to meet him and see you as his mum. You’ve always been so kind but also so strong and smart. Will is lucky to have you.

I wish I had been there too. Even though I’m sure Pol would’ve kept me downstairs, just being there, close by, is all I wanted. I know you were nervous and scared, and I wish I could’ve made it easier for you somehow.

I’m doing everything I can to make sure I get back to you both. I want to see Will grow up, to do all the things with him that my father didn’t do with us. 

Tommy and Arthur send their congratulations and best wishes. Happy news was much needed. 

I love you, Martha Shelby. Thank you for being my soulmate, my girl, my wife, the mother to our son. Thank you for loving me back. And Happy Birthday, love, in case my next letter doesn't arrive in time.

I love you both forever,

John / Dad

PS: Will, I love you mate. I am so happy to be your daddy. 

Martha looked down at Will, who was sleeping next to her on the bed, propped against John’s pillow. It had been a hard few weeks so far, but she knew that would change as Will got older and she had a better grasp on how to care for him.

“Your daddy says hello and that he loves you.” Martha whispered, putting her face close to Will’s, touching his head.

She knew how much this would mean to John, to be a father, to do it in the right way. Neither of them had grown up in a home with two parents who loved each other and cared for each other. Martha losing her father young and her mother not long after. Arthur Shelby Sr. hadn’t been seen in years. Tommy and Arthur had played the role as much as they could to John, and John was doing the same with Finn.  

Carefully laying back, praying she wouldn’t wake up Will, Martha let her mind drift. To whenever she would see John again, watching him take care of their son. More children in the future, God willing, a house in the country with all of them running around, driving John crazy even though he would fully admit to loving all the chaos.

She thought about how it would be years from now. John coming in to their bedroom after locking up the house and checking one more time on the kids. Sliding into bed next to her, pulling her into him, skin touching, his hand on her waist. Blue grey to bright green.

Together forever.

[stoprobbers]

Theories and hopes about Jancy’s reunion? By the way I’ve been rereading your fics for comfort so if the writers fail us I’m at least glad we have amazing AO3 writers like you to make up for it

guys there are so many messages like this in my inbox including from like the day that vol. 1 dropped so let me publicly apologize now for everyone i have NOT responded to, i am such an ass.

so let me get this out of the way at the top: while my ENTIRE SOUL craves their reunion as soon as possible, i do actually value the plot of this show above all else (hell, putting plot over feelings is what makes season 1 and season 2 so delicious; while i screamed at nancy going back to steve in the s1 finale it also made for the most incredible angst and tension for s2, i love it) and so feel like some of these following thoughts may surprise?

i don't expect it to come early. i expect it after the (first?) big vecna battle because...

i think the (first?) big vecna battle might happen simultaneously across all american locations; so you've got jonathan, will, mike, argyle and el in nevada with el going into max's mind; nancy, steve and robin (g1) and eddie and dustin (g2) in the upside down; and lucas, max and erica in the creel house in Real Hawkins. and i think/hope that el's entrance into max's mind comes relatively late, thus surprising vecna and causing what appears to be a false victory for our heroes because...

i think vecna is still going to be the primary threat for season 5, and i think/hope that he will also either be using el or using... will...

because i think that's what will's "he's not going to stop until he kills everyone" line is really about in the vol. 2 trailer. i think (i hope?) the first season ends with will getting got in vecna's spell, and being used as vecna's minion, because i think it's vecna who wanted him all along. that the demogorgon scared him in season 1 episode 1, but that vecna is what got him in the shed. what brought him to the other side. because i think (i hope?) will has powers, too.

i realize that NONE of that is jancy but i needed to get that out of the way because what i want for jancy is this:

i want nancy to be able to express her relief that jonathan is finally, finally there because i think the subtext of her entire attitude this season, especially since fred died, has been "i miss him and i wish he was here with me" and she has been afraid or unwilling to say it aloud, for whatever reason. so i want the relief to be on her face, on her body, hell i want it to come out of her mouth. i want her to hug him with her entire soul because she is finally, finally safe in his arms again.

i want jonathan to apologize for not calling, to explain why they are there and why they had to be so silent about it, to fill THE ENTIRE teen gang, but especially nancy, in on what happened with them this whole time. i want nancy to do the same in return.

(i want the argyle in person introduction to be funny. please. this is gonna be heavy. let us laugh.)

i want them to get a quiet moment to themselves, and i want them to talk. even if they can't resolve everything now, i want them to trust each other enough to express their fears about the future, worries about college, concerns about their ability to be long distance. and i want them to reaffirm that it's hard but it's worth it; they made a vow at the end of season 3, and i want them to reiterate it. because they meant it. i was there, i saw it with my own damn eyes.

and i want them to fucking kiss.

and then i want the entire world to go to shit as will rises into the air under vecna's influence and for the season to end on a motherfucking hell of a cliffhanger.

will i get what i want? lolololololololol no fucking way. i never do. but i hope i get at least some of that. i think my desires for the reunion are reasonable. it's not asking too much.

and, you know, if i don't get it, well, i'm gonna go stand on some lawns and do some really loud, angry shouting. (jk, i'm gonna write a million fanfic about it)

i'm not gonna say any of these are really theories (beyond the will stuff and the plot stuff, i really do feel like they're laying that foundation and oh my god, if it does go that way then season 5 is going to be devastating), but these are my hopes, at least. what about you guys?

[takemebacktowheniwassane]

Part 13!

-

Evan: Fight me!

Jared, behind him, holding a knife: *Mouths* Do not.

-

Connor: I desire moisture.

Zoe: Just say 'I want water' like a normal human being.

-

Connor, to Jared: Stop calling yourself hot. The only thing you can turn on is the microwave.

-

Evan: What goes up but never comes down?

Jared: The amount of stress you bring me daily.

-

Miguel: How would you like your coffee?

Connor: As dark, and as bitter as my soul.

Miguel: Got it, one cup of milk with extra sugar coming right up!

-

Connor: I could kill you if I wanted.

Jared: Oh yeah? So could any other human being.

Jared: So could a dog.

Jared: So could a dedicated duck.

Connor:

Jared: Your not special.

-

Jared: How the hell are you still alive?

Evan: Honestly, I am just as confused as you are.

-

Jared: *Pulls back the curtain while Evan is showering*

Jared: Did we-- Evan, stop screaming, it's just me. --Did we run out of cheerios?

-

Larry: So what are your political beliefs?

Heidi, trying to sound like she knows what she's doing: Well, I think Pikachu would be a lot more powerful if he had a gun.

-

Connor: Stop failing!

Evan: Don't tell me what to do! I'll fail right now!

Evan: *Succeeds*

Evan: Dang it!

-

Evan: I am a responsible adult!

Jared: *Raises brow*

Evan: I am an adult.

Jared: That's much more accurate.

-

Connor: My ultimate goal is to punch God in the eye, just to spite him one last time.

-

Jared, trying to impress Evan: I re-initialized the entire command structure, retaining all programmed abilities, but deleting the supplementary preference architecture.

Zoe: He turned it off, and then turned it back on again.

-

Evan: So, Jared is no longer aloud to take the trash out at night.

Alana: Why?

Evan: Because I've caught him trying to train raccoons to fight five times in a row.

Jared, arms crossed and pouting: You'll be thanking me when the third raccoon battalion saves your ass.

-

Zoe: You are irrationally angry 365 days a year.

Connor: Well, that's just your personal opinion. I don't have anger issues. Do you guys think that I have anger issues?

Jared: Well, you see, I wouldn't call them 'issues'.

Jared: Issues are something you can fix.

-

Evan: My dad's name is just mine as well, so technically I'm just Mark Jr.

Jared: But who comes up when you look up 'Mark Evan Hansen' on google?

Alana: That's what I thought!

Jared: One Mark to rule them all!

-

Jared: Hello, it is I, your favorite person.

Evan: Oh actually, Zoe's my favorite person.

Jared, annoyed but holding it in: Okay, then.

Jared: It is I,

Jared: That bitch.

-

Alana: What's it like being tall?

Zoe: Is it nice?

Miguel: Can you reach comfortably for the cupboards?

Evan: We live in constant fear of the short ones, who, in my experience, will climb 4 chairs, 2 boxes, a small coffee table, and 6 oddly placed stools to get what they want.

Jared: It was ONE time!

-

Alana, who just won Evan at armwrestling: I am strong! I beat Evan at armwrestling!

Connor, who has beaten Evan at armwrestling at least 7 separate times: Anyone can beat Evan at armwrestling.

Evan, who really just lets everyone win at armwrestling to be nice: Hey-

-

Miguel: Connor's gonna kill me.

Zoe: No, he'll probably just make me do it.

-

Evan: We can't tell you because your not a member of the club!

Jared: What club?

Connor: The Hating Jared Kleinman Club.

Jared: What the fuck? I should be the president of that club!

-

Alana: The clock is ticking! We don't have time for this asinine tomfoolery!

Jared: The unmitigated poppycock?

Zoe: Extravagant hogwash!

Evan: Okay, stop.

-

Evan: How do you tell someone that you want to have sex with them in a polite way?

Connor: Excuse me Mr, would you give me the honour of indulging in sexual activity with you?

Jared: What the fuck is wrong with you two?

-

Jared: *Speaking Spanish*

Evan: I know, I know.

Alana: You speak Spanish?

Evan: No. I just know the phrase 'this is all your fault' in every language Jared speaks.

-

Zoe: The ritual. To perform it requires a sacrifice.

Connor: Sacrifice? I nominate Jared.

Jared: Wait, what?

Connor: Because you're little, you'll fit on a barbecue.

Jared: I'm 5'9, it's like average height in most of the world!

Evan: It's not that kind of of sacrifice guys!

-

Zoe: Connor won't wake up, what do I do?!

Jared: Did you try kicking him??

Zoe: Yes!

Jared: Then I'm out of ideas.

-

Evan: I asked Zoe out.

Jared: Oh, I'm sorry.

Evan: Why?

Jared: I just assumed she said no.

Evan: No actually, she said yes.

Jared: Oh.

Jared: Then I'm sorry for her.

-

Evan: It’s impossible to make a sentence without using the letter a.

Alana: Despite your thinking, it is quite possible, yet difficult, to form one without the specific letter. Here’s one more to further disprove your theory.

Jared: Fuck you.

-

Jared: Zoe, I know you love Evan. I mean, we all do, he's a very nice person and I totally respect him deep down.

Jared: But I think he might be a fucking idiot.

-

Zoe: How high are you?

Connor: Hm, I don't know how to say it in feet.

Evan: No, she's asking you about what drugs your on.

Connor: Oh, antidepressants, why?

-

Evan: Connor gave me a Get Well Soon card.

Alana: Awhh, that's nice of him.

Evan: I wasn't sick, he just thought that I could do better.

-

Evan: Hey Jared, Connor just broke my seashell lamp,

Jared: Neat, I'm gonna die alone.

Evan:

Evan: Okay, you win.

-

[During the 'Evan using everyone and being a fucking asshole' segment]

Alana: You really believe in Evan?

Jared, annoyed: Luckily, he believes in himself enough for both of us.

-

Heidi: You don't need my blessing to go kiss Evan. In fact, I was pretty sure you were already kissing Evan!

Jared: Nope.

Heidi: In that case, as the archbishop of Jared's fully awakened gaydom, I give you my blessing to immediately leave and rectify that as soon as possible! Go now, my child, and kiss Evan right on the lips!!!

-

Connor: Go. Let it out. Cry, Evan. If you don't, your tear ducts will get blocked up, and then when you get old, you won't be able to cry.

Alana: Just when we thought it was safe to add you back into the conversation.

[willymywonkers]

The Proposal

Summary: After a year of actually being together, Willy proposes to Maude. Maude gets flashbacks to her previous marriage, and declines Willy's proposal.

A/N: 2 fics in one day, what am I? Sleep Deprived? Yup! Also, this has to be my best writing fic I've done so far!!! I'm really proud of it!!

The golden florescent lighting hung from the ceiling like vines from a tree. People filled the ballroom, sipping different expensive wine and other adult drinks.

Willy Wonka usually wouldn't attend such extravagant events such as this one. They made him extremely uncomfortable, and usually stayed in the back of the room. However, this event in particular was extremely important to him, because Maude would be showing up any moment.

This was the moment he had been waiting for his entire life. Being the incredible chocolatier, Willy Wonka, it was hard to find someone to share his factory with. When Maude finally came back into his life, he felt complete. Charlie and the Buckets were know his family, and he wanted Maude to be apart of it.

Despite her constant gum chewing and her quite abnormal personality, he found himself daydreaming about her, like when he was younger.

He found himself in the back of the ballroom, sipping on what people called sparkling water. Will stared at it, disgusted.

"Do people actually drink this?" Will said aloud to Charlie, who was standing next to him in a little tux.

Charlie smiled up at him."Yes, I think adults do quite often."

"Well, it tastes like static."

Mr. Bucket ran up to Will, tapping him on the shoulder. "She's here." He whispered.

Will put his glass of static down, and walked over to the center of dance floor. He looked up at Maude.

She looked absolutely dazzling. She was wearing a long gold satin dress, wearing dangling bee earrings, with a matching bee necklace.

Will stood there, with a look of pure adoration. His mouth agape, and every thought left his head. The pure magic that radiated off of her made every inch of Will's body feel all warm and fuzzy. He didn't get this feeling often. Only a select few people in his life ever made him feel this way. She reminded him of honey, so soft and sweet.

"Willy? Are you alright?" Maude chuckled, snapping Willy out of his fantasy.

"Uh, yeah, heh." Will cleared his throat. He still stood there, staring at her.

Just then, Charlie came to his rescue. The boy handed him a couple notecards and a microphone.

Will smiled slightly, nodding at Charlie. "Greetings, Guests."

The microphone gave off loud feedback. Will tapped on it, and it went back to normal.

"Heh, my apologies. I'd like to my a special announcement."

Will got down on one knee. His breath was shaky, and so where his hands. Anxiety ran up his body. He took out a sliver ring with a the signature Wonka swirl on top.

Maude's eyes widened as Will kneeled in front of her. People were staring at her, awaiting for an answer.

"Marjorine Figgle, you have been in my life longer than I can remember. Would you do me the honor of being my wife, and share the factory with me and Charlie?"

Thoughts ran through her head, especially ones from her past marriage. She tightly clutched her arm, remembering when it was limp like yoke. She remembered Ron's loud temper tantrums, and his bloody screaming in the night. Tears trickled down her cheeks.

"N-no." She answered, finally. "I c-can't. I'm sorry."

Maude ran out of the ballroom in tears, while Willy stood there, confused and hurt.

He stood back up. "What? Maude!"

She ran off to the very top of the building, staring at the city skyline. Her makeup was ruined, and her glasses were foggy from the warm salty tears.

She wasn't a good wife. Why would Willy want her of all people? Self doubt played over and over in her head. She didn't deserve any of this.

Willy looked at the ring. Was it not good enough? Did he do something wrong? He hated seeing her distressed and upset. He took off his top hat, reflecting on what he had done to cause her to be upset like that.

"This was a stupid idea." He muttered.

"No, of course not, Mr. Wonka. We'll find." Mrs. Bucket reassured.

Willy still stayed in the back as the Buckets looked for Maude. He couldn't help, but feel absolutely heartbroken. He put all this effort just to please her, and all he got in return was heartache. If heartache were a taste, it would be like a sour bitter grapefruit with a sharp and salty aftertaste. That taste was captivating in his mouth. It was disgusting.

Will put his top hat back on and headed upstairs. He found Maude sobbing on the balcony, with her glasses off.

He looked at her with concern. He walked over to her. He put his arms around hesitantly, pulling her into a hug. She continued to cry into his chest.

"I'm sorry." Maude said. Her voice was strained from crying.

"No, please don't be." Will gently patted her head with his gloved hand.

She pulled out of the hug, sniffling. "I don't get how you'd even want to be with me. Will, I'm not good enough for you."

"That's not true." Will sighed, frustrated. "I've always wanted to share my factory with someone I could truly trust. That person is you, Maude."

Will fumbled through his pockets, and took out the ring. "I love you."

Maude gently put a hand against Willy's soft pale cheek. She smiled, slightly. "I love you too, Will. I always have."

"Maude," Will handed the ring to Maude, gently putting in on her hand. "Would you do me the honor of sharing the factory with me and Charlie?"

Maude pulled Will into a swift kiss. His lips tasted of all the sweet things in the world, and she melted like a sweet carmel against his tongue.

"Of course, Willy." She finally said, as she pulled of the kiss.

"Good. You had me worried there for a second." Willy giggled. "Are you ready to go back to the party?"

"No, not really. I just like this." Maude rested her head against Willy's chest.

"Yeah, me too."