#i can provide for myself but ideally when i consider myself successful on this blog is when i no longer have to make anything for this ship

[ms-all-sunday]

i eat east blue polycule content that isnt my own up you can make a post and my mood will literally switch in an instant i am that desperate

[nbenvs3000w24]

Unpacking the World of Privilege

Hi everyone!

Welcome back to my third blog post!

So far, we’ve talked about more light hearted subjects such as my evolutionary relationship with nature, my personal experiences with nature and my ideal world as an environmental interpreter and what that would entail. In this week's post, I am going to reflect on what role privilege plays in nature interpretation and how I have experienced forms of privilege within my own life.  As we head into this weeks blog post, I acknowledge that myself and those who read this, might feel moments of discomfort or uneasiness however, I believe this to be an important topic to reflect on. 

To begin, privilege to me is the advantages and benefits that come with having a certain identity such as race, gender, or economic status that often provides easier access to opportunities, resources and overall a heightened sense of well-being and success. As mentioned in the readings this week, many individuals born into more privileged environments, “are not taught to recognize their own privileges,” and after reflecting on my own life, I’ve realized that there are many ‘invisible backpacks’ I carry that I haven’t truly recognized (Gallavan, 2005). To get personal and transparent, I am white, middle class, speak English, was able to get a University degree with help from my family, was not born with physical or cognitive disabilities and wake up each day with a roof over my head and food on the table. Although many of these things might seem small or trivial, the impact they can hold is significant without even realising it. 

An experience in my life where I truly realized my own privilege, was when I volunteered at Kids Ability to assist in a swim program for children with disabilities. I learned through my time assisting these children that there are barriers and obstacles they face that do not make them any less of a person, but that gives a person like me an amplitude of challenges I will never have to face. If I connect this topic to the world of nature interpretation, the concept of privilege is particularly important when considering individuals with disabilities as they may face various barriers that affect their ability to access and interpret the natural world around them. For example, physical access to natural spaces that lack wheelchair ramps or accessible trails or inadequate visual or tactile tools such as braille or audio descriptions. As mentioned in the textbook, it is important as nature interpreters to integrate all audiences by providing opportunities for building social skills for those with and without disabilities while also recognizing our own privilege we carry in relation to those around us. Some suggested examples of proper etiquette when working with people with disabilities are: don’t “talk down’ to a person with a disability, speak in a normal tone of voice, be patient and encouraging, do not lean on a wheelchair or any other assistive device, offer assistance only when permission is given, etc (Beck, 2018). Most importantly, as an interpreter it is important to treat every person in your audience the way you would want to be treated and in regard to people with disabilities, “interpreting to people with disabilities involves getting people to participate and learn by building on their knowledge, interests, and skills, just as with any group of visitors!” (Beck, 2018). 

Thank you for reading and I hope you were able to take something away from this post, whether that be reflecting on your own privilege or gaining more knowledge on how to interact with those around you. As always, treat others the way you want to be treated and be kind!!!!!

Cheers, Natalie 

References:

Gallavan, N. P. (2005). Helping teachers unpack their "invisible knapsacks". Multicultural Education, 13(1), 36. https://link-gale-com.subzero.lib.uoguelph.ca/apps/doc/A137921591/AONE?u=guel77241&sid=bookmark-AONE&xid=9fe2f151

Beck, L., Cable, T.T., & Knudson, D.M. (2018). Interpreting cultural and natural heritage: for a better world. Sagamore Publishing.

[a-sleepywitch]

Tarot Tips part 3; Learning how to read (any) card!

Learning how to read cards is, in my opinion, one of the most valuable skills you can learn, not just when dealing with tarot, but pretty much any form of cartomancy that you enjoy. This can be particularly valuable for people like myself, who don't really enjoy memorising cards and keywords. I find that after a certain point in one's tarot journey, you hit a point where you can manage to read most decks without necessarily reading the manual, and so I wanted to make a post to perhaps help speed up that process!

This is going to be a lengthy post, so I apologise for this beforehand! And if this is your first time stumbling upon my blog, here's a link to my other tarot tips post! I will not be tackling reversals in this post, as I already covered it in part 2!

Part 1 | Part 2

Before getting into the nitty gritty of reading cards, I'd like to propose what I consider to be the most foundational aspect of being able to read any deck of cards: Observation. What are you looking at? What do you see? Disregard any symbolism or implications for now, just state what you objectively see in the card. For this example, I’m going to use a relatively easy-to-read card as the starting off point, that being The Fool from Rider-Waite Smith.

What do I see? There's a figure standing near the edge of a cliff, they're looking forward and slightly upwards, they're carrying a knapsack, they're holding a white flower, there's a white dog standing on its hind-legs, the sun is shining and there's mountains in the background

What does this imply? So, what does all this tell us about the card? For one thing, the Fool is headed for the edge of a cliff, but isn't actually looking down. The Fool's attention is forward, yes, but they're not actually looking where they're stepping. Similarly, the dog looks like it's about to leap off the cliff as well, so one can infer that this card likely has something to do with taking a leap of faith. Additionally, the Fool is carrying a knapsack which would imply they may not be home for a while, perhaps suggesting they're setting out on an adventure or a journey. The sun is shining and the background is yellow, with beautiful mountains to complete the idyllic scenery. It looks like a very optimistic card, but one should also remember that the card is called The Fool for a reason. Like the sun, optimism and idealism can be equally as blinding as it is warm and inviting. While this journey may require a leap of faith from The Fool, The Fool is also perhaps a bit blinded by their optimism and naivety (potentially implied by the white flower) to fully realise what they're getting themselves into.

Here’s an example of a card that I personally found more difficult when I first started reading cards due to its rather blatant christian imagery; The Hierophant.

What do I see? The Pope is sitting on a throne, adorned in a red robe and an intricate gold crown of sorts. The Hierophant is holding a golden staff in one hand while pointing up towards the sky with the other, and before him are two golden keys. In front of The Hierophant are two men, presumably dressed in a uniform.

What does this imply? As mentioned, this card can be difficult to apply to casual readings due to its very religious imagery, but breaking down the main components can help us get to the core of the card. So, what does the pope do? The pope is a spiritual leader, whose main job is to centralise its religious doctrine. Now, what does religion do? Religion provides answers that can otherwise be highly subjective, such as the meaning of life, what comes after death, and offering moral guidance. So here, we have a figure whose purpose is to not only morally guide people, but also to set the rules. The two men are uniformly dressed, essentially stripping them of their individualistic traits, suggesting this card has something to do with conformity and creating a norm. The Hierophant has handed the two men a key each, the key to living a successful life; social conformity and following the strict social order set by the person before them. Now, depending on how this card shows up in a reading and the context of the reading/other cards, this card can also be about going against conformity.

You can also use this technique in comparing different cards to get a feel for the overall storytelling. A great example of this is The Lovers and The Devil.

What do I see? In The Lovers, I see a male and a female figure, and an angelic figure between the two of them. Behind them is a mountain, a blue sky, and the sun shining from behind the angel. Behind the female figure is a fruit tree with a serpent wrapping around the tree trunk, and behind the male figure is a tree that appear to be on fire.

In The Devil, I see a male and female figure again, but this time, there's a more demonic figure between the two of them. The background is completely black, and the male and female figures are both chained to the small box that The Devil is perched on. The Female figure has a tail that seems to resemble a fruit, while the male figure has a tail that appears to be on fire. The Devil is also notably holding a torch.

What does this imply? The Lovers have pretty blatant christian imagery as well, so let's break it down the same way we did with The Hierophant. The imagery is clearly referencing the story of Adam and Eve, the two of them standing in the Garden of Eden, and Eve being enticed by the serpent to take a bite from the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil. The Lovers are essentially being presented with a choice; to either give in to their natural curiosity and human desires, or to refrain. Perhaps this suggests a choice between heart and mind, virtue and vice, compliance or action, etc. Personally, I'm not a fan of interpreting this card as being a choice between good or bad, because, realistically, very little in life is as black and white as that. Rather, this card seems to imply that there is a dualistic choice being offered. Yes, we all know that Eve taking a bite from the fruit damns her, but not taking a bite would be compliance with the status quo. Not choosing is also a choice, after all.

Now shifting our focus to The Devil, storytelling wise when compared to the Lovers, this card shows the impact of the choice made by The Lovers. The Devil is typically associated with sin and evil (which is not a particularly nuanced interpretation), but it can also be associated with sex, giving into impulses, non-conformity, eccentricity, etc. Thus, while this card can seem incredibly negative and pessimistic about the choice that's been made, it can also imply something as simple as rejection of the status quo, a rejection of complacency, a desire to fulfil your own passions and desires even if it means sacrificing your own comfort (The Garden of Eden). However, I would still like to point out the chains, which suggests that, although this choice may not be as negative as The Devil card may seem at first glance, the choice that's been made is binding, in the sense that it may have long term consequences; think of things like addiction, co-dependency or submission to something else. In rejecting conformity, one still risks falling into a path of blind submission to a different higher power or belief.

(Note that The Lovers and The Devil don’t parallel each other in all decks, so keep that in mind when deciding how you wish to interpret your particular deck!)

Now the major arcana are often considered easier due to them having very rich imagery, so I want to provide some minor arcana examples as well with various level of detail.

We'll start off with the 4 of Swords.

What do I see? A statue of sorts of a male figure laying on top of a coffin, with the shape of a sword engraved into the side of the coffin as well. The male figure appears to be resting, and on the wall above the resting statue are three swords. Next to the set of swords is a stained glass window.

What does this imply? For one thing, a lot in this card seems to implicate death in some way, not only the coffin, but also due to the stained glass window, which I intuitively interpret as a sign of this taking place in a church. The statue appears to be sleeping or resting, so combined with the theme of death, there's a sense of stagnation, a moment in time where time appears to stop for the person resting. Another thing to consider is the number four. Four is a very stable, rounded number. Think of a table that has four legs, or four pillars holding up a ceiling. While stability is good, it also causes stagnation, as a lot of people may stop themselves from venturing out of their comfort zone in fear of losing said stability. The sword suit, associated with the element of air, is generally considered to be the suit of the mind. A sword cuts through the confusion and complications, it gets straight to the point and gets stuff done. It's blunt and logical, but when you're asleep, you lack that clarity. It may feel like a mental stagnation of sorts, where things become blurry and disorienting, and you can’t quite make sense of things. On the other end; maybe this rest is needed for proper clarity once you wake up. Thus, this card can also be a sign of contemplation and much needed rest. You may feel stuck now, but rest is necessary to move forward.

Below we have the 7 of Pentacles!

What do I see? I see a person who looks a bit exhausted, appearing as if they're taking a break from work. They seem to be in the middle of harvesting something, and is currently staring at the product of their labor. Behind them is a dry patch of land and a light grey sky, but they seem to be stepping on water as well. There are seven pentacles, but only one of them has been harvested.

What does this imply? This card is all about reaping the benefits of your work, but note that this is only the beginning of that process, as there is still work to be done. Pentacles, being associated with earth, is generally viewed as the suit of materialistic and physical needs, with the pentacle representing the five senses of the human body. As such, it's common to interpret pentacle cards as being related to things like work, finances and one's home life, which all serve to fulfil one's physical needs one way or another (money from labor is what puts food on the table, after all). Another thing that I think is worth noting with this card is not only is this just the beginning of reaping the benefits, but the person is also taking a break, with an almost contemplative look on their face. When working to pursue one's own comfort, it's important to not forget to self reflect and question whether this labor is worthwhile or even fulfilling to the person. Especially when you have yet to see the fruits of your labor, it can be difficult to find motivation, but the rewards are just around the corner.

And finally, here's a significantly more minimalistic card; the 8 of Wands.

What do I see? There's a luscious landscape in the background, with a small hill and a river. At the forefront are eight wands, which appear to be launching forward (at least if you're used to reading from left right).

What does this imply? The wands are launching forward, almost as if someone's thrown them with immense force. This is an energetic, action oriented card, brimming with rapid movement towards the future. The suit of wands, which is associated with fire, is all about passion, willpower, desires, creativity, etc. This could imply that the card is all about taking action in pursuing what you truly desire. Another way to look at this card is to compare it to the seven of pentacles we saw earlier. You'll find that a lot of the imagery you'll see in the seventh card in a rider-waite smith deck has to do with perseverance, taking a moment to introspect, reassess, choose, etc. With eight being the number after seven, eight is about taking action after all that reflection. Personally, I can't help but view the seventh card as a protagonist's darkest moment right before the third act of a story kicks off, when they finally decide to take action, leading into the eighth card. Of course, this is just a way I personally read those particular cards, but my point is that you can find a lot of narrative flows in the cards that help contextualise them and intuitively read them without having to necessarily memorise what they mean!

My most important Advice; Read cards a lot. Your intuition for picking up on symbolism and implications will develop as you get used to observing, and over time, you'll just naturally pick up on how to read a card!

And finally, there is no shame in having to look up meanings. Some days, I'm tired and exhausted. Maybe I have mild brain fog that day. Maybe I'm just not in the right mood. It doesn't matter, there are days where even the most obvious cards go completely over my head and I have to look something up. There are days where I'm sitting and staring at cards and can't get anything from it, even while knowing what the cards mean. There are days my readings feel clunky and contradictory and nothing makes sense, and that's completely ok! At the end of the day, like with most special interests, hobbies and practices, we can have our off days where nothing feels right, but don't let your worst days define your overall skillset. Have some fun with it! If you're really determined to put your cards to use despite your burnout, maybe do something less serious! Start reading for your favourite fictional character or something, or ask a silly question, like how would this deck define the color blue, etc!

If you treat it less rigorously, I promise you'll have an easier time reading cards intuitively, because you're not restricting yourself or being too harsh with how you read them. Loosen up and have some fun with your deck! As usual, I'm more than happy to answer questions that I'm capable of answering, and I'd love any additional input! My asks are always open!

[wafflemeido]

Is Dating a Sugar Daddy in Kenya the Right Thing?

How did you start being a sugarbabe? What motivated you to it? I consider myself a muse, I’ve always loved dressing up, pampering myself, and enjoying the finer things in life, from the arts to food, traveling, and fashion, My hobbies are all very sense orientated, I love to feel good, and I enjoy making other people feel good. I like to spread good energy, inspire creativity & relish in life. I am strong & confident, and am at a stage now where I am taking my desires and relationships into my own hands, I’ve experienced real love, and that remains a part of who I am, now it’s time to have fun! 😉

When I realized there was a platform to explore my ideal relationships, I dove in head first.

What were some of the negative experiences you had? Initially breaking into the sugar dating world, I realized that online introductions can be undesirable, and that face-to-face daily interactions are the way to go, however, that takes time & patience, and research, which I consider an investment.

The negative experiences have been the men who do not ‘get’ the lifestyle or who are not genuine gentlemen who know or want to treat woman like queens, and being approached in a derogatory manner, or outright lied to, with intentions to take advantage..

What were some of the more positive experiences you have had? Meeting sugar babies, and the interesting knowledge I’ve gained from viewing life from this perspective. Access to the knowledge of others (blogs/books etc) and the inspiration provided by successful Sugars daddies, meeting like minded gents & literally having our cake & eating it.

What advice can you give to others who would like to try it? Research! Check out all the blogs & websites, connect with other Sugar babies. You will gain valuable insight into how to present yourself, and learn from others experiences, Take time to write down a list of your goals, define yourself clearly, & be confident. Take good care of your health, diet & exercise. Always trust your instincts. Respect yourself & the men that pamper you.

What do you like most about being a sugarbabe or being in this kind of lifestyle? I love being feminine & girly, lingerie, flowers, gifts, dinners, looking gorgeous, and being around gentlemen who love & appreciate that. Being a social butterfly.

Sugar Daddy- I’m generous in nature, and enjoy receiving. It’s a good outlet for my assertive side.

What do you find most attractive in a sugardaddy?

Sugar daddy- A good heart, elegance, appreciation for style & class. Someone generous & open minded, that’s successful, ambitious & smart. I like to surround myself with quality people.

Who knows about your profession or hobby? What was their reaction? Only one close female friend is aware of this new adventure, she’s open minded.

Have you ever consider not doing it anymore? why?

This is new to me, and I believe after I’ve absorbed all the information/literature & experiences it will (already has) alter me, and I’ll keep what’s good & serves me, and let the rest pass. My goal is to be successful, I have a career, and have worked for all I have, ideally I’d like to have my own business, and develop my talents and have an outlet for them, (fashion, art & music) I’ve always been self sustained, this for me is the icing on the cake and a means to fast track my full potential, and give back to the world around me.

Can you live off it well or just enough for some expenses? At this stage I am living off my own income, and am looking to this as an experience, to travel, have pretty things, and explore myself & the people I meet. I am trusting it will build to the stage where I can transition from my career (cutting my hours down slowly) into my own business, I would never rely on one stream of income alone.

How has your life changed with it? It has already changed, from when my perspective shifted from my initial reaction to “sugar baby” and discovering the particular type of sugar baby presence that suits me, my life has been changing daily, by the knowledge I’ve found, the interactions with people online, and defining my own goals & intentions, the mental shift has been empowering.

I’m ready to step into this world, Let’s see what comes of this!

[caccontracting]

10 Essential Tips for a Perfect Fence Installation in Surrey 

Fence installation is one of the most impactful improvements you can make to your property. Whether you're seeking enhanced privacy and security or simply adding aesthetic value, a well-constructed fence can transform your space. But before diving in, there are essential factors you should consider. This guide will answer all your questions about fence installation  in Surrey , offering expert insights, key statistics, and actionable steps to ensure your fence stands strong and looks great for years.

In this blog, we'll cover frequently asked questions about fence installation, offer valuable tips, and highlight crucial points to remember during the process. From material choices to cost considerations, you'll learn everything you need to know to make your fence installation successful.

1. Why Should I Install a Fence on My Property?

Fences serve a variety of purposes depending on your needs. Here are the most common reasons people install fences:

Privacy: A fence blocks the view of your property from neighbours or passersby, giving you and your family a sense of seclusion.

Security: Fences create a physical barrier, deterring intruders and keeping pets and children safely inside your yard.

Aesthetics: Well-designed fences can add to the overall look of your home, enhancing curb appeal and property value.

Noise Reduction: Solid fences, like wood or vinyl, can dampen outside noise, offering a quieter, more peaceful outdoor experience.

According to a 2023 survey, homes with fenced-in yards have increased property values by up to 15%. That's a significant return on investment when considering fence installation.

2. What Types of Fences Are Best for Installation?

Choosing the suitable material for your fence depends on several factors, including budget, style preferences, and maintenance needs. Here are the most popular fence materials:

Wood Fences: Known for their natural look, wood fences are famous for their versatility in design. However, they require regular maintenance to prevent rot and insect damage.

Vinyl Fences: Durable and low-maintenance, vinyl fences resist weather damage and last longer than wood. They also come in various styles to mimic the appearance of wood or other materials.

Aluminum Fences: These fences provide a sleek, modern look and are great for security without obstructing views. However, they may not offer much privacy.

Chain-Link Fences: Affordable and easy to install, chain-link fences are commonly used for securing large areas. They aren't ideal for privacy but can be fitted with privacy slats or plants for a more enclosed feel.

Composite Fences: Made from a combination of wood fibres and plastic, composite fences offer the natural look of wood without the need for intense upkeep.

3. What Is the Average Cost of Fence Installation?

The fence installation cost can vary based on material, size, and location. On average, homeowners can expect to pay between $1,500 and $4,500 for a typical residential fence. 

Here's a quick breakdown by material:

Wood: $10 - $30 per linear foot

Vinyl: $20 - $40 per linear foot

Aluminum: $25 - $50 per linear foot

Chain-Link: $5 - $20 per linear foot

It's essential to budget for both the cost of materials and labor if you're hiring professionals. Installing a fence yourself can save money, but professional installation ensures durability and long-lasting results.

4. Should I Install the Fence Myself or Hire a Professional?

While DIY fence installation may seem cost-effective, it comes with challenges. Here are the pros and cons of each option:

DIY Installation:

Pros: Cost savings, personal satisfaction, and the ability to work at your own pace.

Cons: Time-consuming, physically demanding, and prone to errors if inexperienced.

Hiring Professionals:

Pros: Efficient, high-quality work and fewer mistakes. Professionals ensure the fence complies with local codes and regulations.

Cons: Higher cost due to labour, but long-term benefits in quality and durability.

Hiring a professional is the best option for most homeowners, particularly for complex or large projects.

5. What Are the Common Mistakes to Avoid When Installing a Fence?

Fence installation may seem straightforward, but many people make costly mistakes. Avoid these common errors:

Ignoring Property Lines: Ensure you know where your property line begins and ends. Installing a fence on your neighbour's land can lead to legal disputes.

Skipping Permits: In most areas, you need a permit to install a fence. Check local regulations to avoid fines.

Choosing the Wrong Material: Consider your climate and maintenance requirements. A wood fence may not be ideal in a humid area where rot is common.

Incorrect Post Placement: Posts are the foundation of your fence. Place them too far apart, and your fence may sag; bury them too shallow, and it could topple in high winds.

Forgetting Drainage: In areas with heavy rainfall, make sure your fence allows for proper drainage to prevent water buildup, which can lead to damage over time.

6. How Do I Maintain My Fence After Installation?

Proper maintenance can extend the life of your fence by years. Here's how to care for the most common types:

Wood Fences: Regularly clean and re-stain or paint to protect against moisture and UV damage. Treat the wood for termites and rot every few years.

Vinyl Fences: Clean with a mild soap solution and water to remove dirt and debris. Vinyl is low-maintenance and resistant to rot, but it can crack in frigid temperatures.

Metal Fences: Keep your aluminum or chain-link fence rust-free by cleaning and applying a protective coating. Inspect for damage and make repairs as necessary.

Composite Fences: These require minimal maintenance. A simple cleaning with water and detergent should suffice.

According to the American Fence Association, proper maintenance can increase a fence's lifespan by up to 30%.

7. How Long Does It Take to Install a Fence?

The timeline for fence installation depends on the fence type, the project size, and the installers' experience. A typical residential fence takes anywhere from 3 to 7 days to install. Larger or more complex fences may require more time, especially if the ground needs significant preparation.

If you're on a tight schedule, working with a professional team can speed up the process and ensure the job is done efficiently.

8. Do I Need to Consider the Soil Type Before Installing a Fence?

Yes! The type of soil on your property can impact the stability of your fence. Sandy or loose soil requires deeper post holes to ensure stability, while clay-rich soils may need extra drainage to prevent water accumulation and fence damage.

Professional installers will typically assess your soil and make recommendations accordingly.

9. What Are the Legal Requirements for Fence Installation?

Before installing a fence, check local zoning laws, as there may be height, material, and placement regulations. Some neighbourhoods or homeowner associations (HOAs) also have specific rules about the appearance and height of fences.

Failing to comply with these laws could lead to fines or the need to remove your fence entirely, costing you time and money. Make sure to obtain the necessary permits and adhere to all guidelines.

10. How Do I Choose the Right Fence Installer?

Selecting the right fence installer is crucial for a smooth and stress-free project. Here's what to look for in a contractor:

Experience: Look for a company with a proven track record of successful fence installations.

Reviews and References: Check online reviews and ask for references from past clients to gauge their quality of work.

Licensing and Insurance: Ensure your installer is licensed and insured to protect yourself from potential liabilities.

Warranty: Choose a company that offers a warranty on both materials and workmanship to safeguard your investment.

Conclusion

Installing a fence is a valuable investment that can boost your home's security, privacy, and curb appeal. Whether you install it yourself or hire professionals, knowing the process, costs, and potential pitfalls will help you make an informed decision. Remember to select the suitable material, follow local regulations, and maintain your fence to ensure it lasts for years.

Following these tips and insights, you're one step closer to the perfect fence that suits your needs. Ready to get started? Evaluate your options, create a plan, and enjoy the benefits of a beautifully installed fence!

[tlbodine]

Things That Do (And Don’t) Sell Books (in my experience)

I’ve just finished reading this book:

I am both amused and a bit disheartened to have read the whole thing and discovered that I knew pretty much everything in it. Amused, because I guess I’ve picked up a lot of knowledge over the years. Disheartened, because it clearly has not led to me becoming the break-away success I always dreamed of. Ah well. Live and learn. 

I’m all about transparency in this business, so I wanted to talk honestly for a while about book marketing and what I’ve experienced in terms of what does and does not seem to work. I’d love to hear your thoughts, so chime in with your own experiences! 

Branding and Audience 

The first third of Burke’s book is dedicated to this aspect, and it’s an important marketing step that’s easy to overlook. The idea is basically that you can’t market a product unless it has a brand identity. To create your brand, you need to do the following: 

Identify the audience who you are trying to reach with your work, or who would be most receptive to what you’re writing

Identify your dreams and goals so you have a clear picture in mind of what you want to accomplish 

Figure out how to position yourself in such a way that you a.) stand out from the competition but b.) people can still relate to and understand at a glance

Find a way to communicate your brand consistently in terms of the language used, your aesthetic, the way you act online, and so forth. 

When it comes to brand-building as an author, I think I’ve got a bit of a corner nailed down. I at least hope to be perceived as someone level-headed, thoughtful, generally positive/empathetic and humanist, but also critical and looking deeper into the meanings of things -- all of which are traits I personally possess and which are baked in to the work I do. In support of that branding, I curate my activity online as best I can: I post things that are of a certain horror aesthetic that I feel overlaps with my own interests/style; I give writing advice and boost people in the community where I can; I wade into discourse selectively and thoughtfully; I give media reviews and analysis that I think would be interesting to like-minded people. 

The “identify the audience” part is much harder for me. I’m still honestly not sure who my ideal reader is, or where exactly to go to find my audience. At this point I’m kind of scattering crumbs of myself out into the wind and hoping it will attract people who will, in turn, be interested in the work that I do (and both willing and able to support it financially). 

Things I’ve Done With Varying Degrees of Success: 

Aforementioned blogging activities. I have slowly but steadily grown my following her on tumblr and other social media sites as well as my author newsletter on substack, but it’s not clear to what extent that following translates into book sales. My writing advice posts vastly out-perform all of my other content, but I haven’t seen compelling evidence that the people interested in my writing advice are especially interested in my fiction -- it seems to be two separate groups, with maybe a sliver of overlap. 

Content marketing with more short fiction. This seems like it should be the safest, surest way to find more readers, but it’s time-consuming and discouraging because of the discoverability cycle. My horror flash fiction posts don’t get nearly as many notes as my advice posts. My attempts to get into the big anthologies that pop up have so far amounted to little, although I do need to write more. It’s just that coming up with new ideas and writing them all the time is a lot of work, and if it’s not paying off maybe I’m still better off dedicating that work to my novels. 

Sending ARCs to book bloggers/reviewers/booktube etc. I sent out dozens, if not hundreds, of these and got next to no response. I do think part of the problem is that, at the time, I had no Twitter presence, and -- like it or not -- there seems to be a bit of cliqueishness to this aspect of the book world. Now that I’ve spent more time on Twitter ingratiating myself with the horror community, I suspect I’ll have a somewhat easier job securing blurbs and reviews at least from the people in my extended social circle. But I won’t know until I try it again. *I also know I would have greater success with this if I’d been sending paperback ARCs instead of digital. I didn’t, because the cost of buying more author copies + shipping was prohibitive. 

Author Newsletter. I maintain mine in conjunction with my Patreon account. I send a monthly news round-up, making a point of shouting out both industry news and the milestones/achievements of others in the community as well as providing what I hope to be value-added or interesting content (in the form of blog posts my patrons vote on). It does OK. I average a couple of new sign-ups per month this way and tend to hover around a 25% open rate, which isn’t terrible. But it’s not great, either, and I won’t know for sure whether any of those opens will actually yield sales at any point. 

Interpersonal relationships/community building. Hands down the most successful “marketing” thing I’ve ever done is make friends with people. My writing discord group is small but very close-knit and interacting with them is one of the genuine highlights of my day. I didn’t really make it with mercenary intentions of selling books, but it has directly resulted in sales. Similarly, there are a handful of authors from Twitter and Wattpad that I’ve developed genuine friendships with, and we buy each other’s books and support one another. This whole community aspect is extremely rewarding and I’d do it whether or not it sold books, but it’s also not exactly easy to scale. I can only maintain genuine friendships with so many people. 

Posting in reading groups. The books that allow self-promo are so saturated with it that nobody pays any attention. The good groups do not allow self-promo, unless it’s in the form of getting down in the comments and recommending a book on a per-person basis to people looking for a specific thing, and only then if you’re not being spammy. Again, this is time-consuming. You could spend your entire life in these groups, hand-selling books to these people, and maybe picking up a few sales. They do seem like a good place to identify trends, though, so they’re good for market research if not direct selling. 

Things I Have Not Done, But Which I Suspect Would Sell Books 

Paid promotions. The golden ticket for book sales still seems to be landing a BookBub promo. If you’re unfamiliar, this is where you price your book at 99 cents or free and then pay bookbub to include it in their deals newsletter. Bookbub is very popular and moves a lot of copies. Ideally, you want to set it up so that your cheap book is the first in a series, and people snap that up and then come back to read the rest. This requires you to have written a series. Also bookbub is expensive because these are premium ads. We’re talking hundreds of dollars for one ad. There are other book promos that are cheaper but don’t have the same buy-through rate. 

Ads on facebook/amazon. I’m only dimly familiar with the ins and outs of these ads. They can be relatively cheap, but the amount of visibility they have is tied to your budget -- so the more you can spend on a campaign, the better your performance will be. 

Calling bookstores/libraries and asking them to order. I should do this. I have not done this purely because I am a coward. 

I am not certain what more I can do to promote my books without spending money. 

I understand the “spend money to make money” concept, but I also understand the “I have a limited budget and cannot spend it willy nilly on things that still might not actually pay off, especially considering how expensive self-publishing is when you want to do it right.” 

...This post ended up in a much more bitter place than I meant for it to. Sorry. I’ll check in if I remember additional points that could be successful strategies. 

[contentbaer]

How to build White Hat SEO Links for Contentbär SEO

So, how do you go about doing true White Hat SEO link building these days? This is perhaps the most often asked question of mine.

To be honest, there is a LOT of incorrect material on the internet about how to accomplish link building that isn't "WHITE HAT."

To be clear, requesting for links for the sole goal of getting them is against Google Webmaster Guidelines and hence not “white hat.”

The good news is that you may now produce a significant return on investment without manually establishing links. Today, I'm going to show you how I've been able to naturally grow links and generate cash without writing a single email, guest post, purchasing a PBN, or doing anything else that link builders do to build links, and how you can do the same.

Does that make sense? Let's get started.

Build Authority for Contentbär Contest Using Your Market's Vulnerabilities

SEO is marketing, not magic. I've said it before, and I'll say it again: it's not magic. Rankings for keywords and links are only a small element of marketing that will ideally result in dollar signs. So, if you could find alternative ways to get revenue outside rating a webpage, wouldn't you want to? The importance of competitor research cannot be overstated.

Here's how to spot flaws in your specialty, as well as how to turn those flaws into natural links and long-term advantages. Take a look at your top 3-5 competitors' platforms to discover where they perform the poorest and best. Determine what works and what doesn't for them.

Is it skyscraper (long form) content that they're after? Maybe 10 minute Youtube videos with unique layouts? Do they have a successful Twitter outreach strategy? and so on. The argument is that if you're just starting out and want links, don't reinvent the wheel; instead, concentrate on establishing authority. To put it another way, strive to copy what your competitors are doing first and then innovate, rather than the other way around.

Consider the following scenario: Because the market on YouTube was so undersaturated in comparison to Google when I launched my SEO service, I started developing big content there. I now have 25k subscribers and over 1 million views on my YouTube channel, and I generate clients, backlinks, reviews, and other revenue from that asset alone on a regular basis. That isn't all, though.

I'm able to divert traffic to new assets that I want to promote and make money off of, such as Facebook groups, blog entries, courses, and so on, thanks to the authority I've built on YouTube. And, if I choose, I can leverage the authority and viewership I've built on Youtube to build links simply by discussing the new assets I'm developing.

In a moment, I'll expand on this. Value is quite important.

If you're having trouble getting links, it's likely that you're not providing enough value for your audience to link back to or share the material you're creating. Alternatively, you may have no audience at all. That is why you must have a strong foundation.

Look, it may seem obvious, but figuring out who you're selling to and what they genuinely want in the first place, if you haven't already, is critical. At the end of the day, you must understand: There are two categories of users who will see your article.

People who are likely to purchase from you

Individuals who will link to you There are some similarities here, but for the most part, people who buy from you are unlikely to connect back to you. So, at first, your content and authority development should ideally be aimed toward the people who will connect to you.

Is that clear?

Doing a roundup or an interview is a great approach to gain links from these folks. Pitchbox is my favorite tool for this because it allows me to connect with some of the world's top experts in any subject with just a few clicks. Take, for example, a recent article I wrote about "the top SEO tools recommended by professionals." All of this outreach was automated, and it only took a few minutes to get the piece published. Every single one of these suggestions came from people with blogs and, in some cases, large social media followings. Not only do I get almost free content from people who know a lot about the subject I'm having them write about, but I also get the chance to gain a link from them in the future because they were mentioned in the piece.

Let's go one step further for Contentbär.

I also now have a direct line of communication with these individuals, so if any of them have unusually high authority in the industry, I could invite them to an interview on my Youtube channel, then give them the video and transcription to post on their site with a link back to me. Again, focusing on building connections and substance rather than going out to random website owners and asking for a link is a WAY better marketing strategy. Make something that people want to tell their friends about.

Figure out what your industry's true needs are if you really want to establish links. Some SEOs seems to only want to do the following:

Investigate keywords.

Find a keyword with a large search volume that appears to be profitable.

Create material based on a guess at the word count.

Inquire about linkages.

I'm hoping the page will be ranked.

For a variety of reasons, this is a bad plan.

If you want to rank for something, you should first check at what is already ranking well for that topic. It's possible that the content is already well-formatted, with thousands of words, video, photographs, comments, and so on, and in that case, simply putting words on a website isn't going to cut it.

You're trying to figure out why Google is giving that page such a high rating in the first place. It's usually because the post is something that people genuinely want.

After you've figured out these two things, you'll want to aim to beat the average user intent and go above and above in terms of not just word count, photos, video, and so on, but also in terms of beating whatever the average expectation for that post is.

If someone is looking for top gaming tips for "insert new game," and the best article on the market is some weak post about 3 strategies to win, which isn't even directly targeting what people are looking for, you could easily write an article on the top 5 gaming tips and rate it without a single link.

If you want to build links, though, you should aim to go above and beyond the average and make the top 50-100 gaming advice, and BOOM, you've got something special worth connecting to. In terms of naturally creating links, obviously you won't want to just generate content and hope someone reads it; instead, you'll want to use the strategies I outlined earlier to bring in more visitors. Here's how I'm going to promote the article you're reading right now.

Originally, I'll have it indexed by Google Search Console so that Google knows the stuff I'm authoring first appeared here.

After that, I'll make a video in which I read this article and add my own thoughts and observations. Once the film is released, I'll link it back to this page in the hopes of having it rank as a video in Google Search as well (making sure I add JSON-LD video markup to the post with a plugin I acquired).

Then I'll take the video and post it on my Facebook group, page, and personal profile in its native format. I'll publish the video to similar other SEO groups after I see how well it performs.

After that, I'll directly repost this post on Reddit. Then, to target recent visitors, I'll launch a remarketing campaign on Facebook advertisements.

Then I'll send an email to my 4k-strong email list, telling people to read the piece and watch the video. After that, I'll share this article on LinkedIn.

You get my drift. At the end of the day, my Youtube video or blog post may only receive a few hundred views and appear on Google's or Youtube's fourth page.

However, my article on various assets will acquire THOUSANDS of views before it even ranks, thus increasing the chances that I will obtain a link or a share.

So there you have it, that's how I develop links without going out and doing it myself, and how you can do it too. If anything was unclear, please let me know by leaving a comment and I'll get back to you as soon as possible.

[meem-didi]

Journal: Final Reflection

The fashion industry has complex links to many other sectors, including manufacturing, advertising, raw material processing, transport, and retailing. The immense profits to be gained in the retail industry give rise to the desire to engage in unethical practices. When suppliers, distributors, designers, or customers are exploited or treated unfairly, fashion industry executives have an ethical duty to improve the situation.  

Within Fashion Ethics and Culture course, we were given the opportunity to explore the breadth of creative, aesthetic, and social/cultural expression of design through the lens of ethical and historic considerations – as it is and how it needs to change, the role of the MENA region and its relationship to fashion media.  

As a student of DIDI, I felt the same link and inspiration between the Fashion Ethics and Culture course and my vision of how I want to be as a future designer and how I should change the current fashion industry status quo with my future career path. The course creates a creative paradigm for learning ethical fashion design through the lens of ethical and historic considerations. Students are introduced to fashion history, cultural criticism, contemporary culture, and the diversity of representation including ethical considerations and perspectives.

In my opinion, this course plays as a moderator between all other fashion courses we study and extend to other courses with depth like sociology and design histories and theories to link and emphasis all courses material in a dynamic way. We covered various subjects relating to Body Image Problems, Fur Trade Issues, Cultural Hegemony and Appropriation, Consumer Over-consumption, Environmental Effects, and Concerns, Advertisement Conflicts, Brand Name Forgery, Sweat Shop Working Conditions, and Exclusiveness and Injustice Issues; that simultaneously vary from micro to macro scale through lectures, group activities, open discussions in class, and individual presentations.

The True Cost Formula 

Investigate your Wardrobe

Doughnut Economics

ATCAC-Disrupting the Fashion System

Earth Logic: the turning point

Careers in the Fashion Industry

The future of Garment Technology in Circular Fashion

Market Segmentation

Fashion for Good: Virtual Tour

Fashion & Society

Made in America

“Luxury: Behind the mirror of high-end fashion”

Empathic Design Process

SOKO Kenya - A people first company

Innovative Fashion Marketing

Key trends innovating Fashion Marketing

Fashion for Good: Virtual Tour

Untangled Egyptian Beauty Standards

The Fashion & Race database

The Modist- Modest Fashion Dream

About Time: Fashion and Duration

The It Girl: Ashley Al Busmait

I enjoyed the above-listed topics and guest lecture discussions we had this semester, but certain to a whole new way of perceiving the world. I would love to deepen and expand my knowledge on the technology and circularity of the fashion industry future as well as focus on modest fashion and ethical practices and success and failure aspects of the Modist business experience. Whether through merging my learning outcome within this semester to my nest fashion studio or final thesis.

Here's my list of the most meaningful subjects for me and some of the highlights of my recent blogs on these topics:

ATCAC-Disrupting the Fashion System

ORIGIN AND HISTORY

Atacac is a Swedish fashion studio that Jimmy Herdberg and Rickard Lindqvist created in 2016. Atacac is designed to disrupt the current fashion system. Atacac is like a laboratory for developing ideas and principles. Then they work as consultants sharing that with other brands to improve their design. The other way they work with other designers is what they call Share-wear. When they release a new product in their online store, they also offer the 2D pattern and the 3D model of the garment for free download. This builds a community of home sellers and independent brands that use their patterns and designs. In certain terms, you can do whatever you want. There is a Credit Common Licence connected to the Share-wear which means you can use it commercially in any way you like, and you can make improvements to it, But you need to give credit back to Atacac if you use it commercially and market the product. You also need to make your development available for other people to keep developing further.

For me ATCAC is a brilliant business module example that is trying to blow the entire system to the ground, I loved how I saw ATCAC embodying every principle, I have been learning for the past 3 years. This blog post and the investigation behind it gave me hope that I can succeed in doing something different with my future dream brand.

Innovative Fashion Marketing

Stretchy Kids’ Clothes Petit Pli gets a growing identity

A sustainable fashion design example that offers apparel that evolves as the wearer grows older has an innovative branding that sounds like “more human” and “less professional." The idea is to reduce the waste of apparel and save parents’ money as children progress up a range of sizes in the first three years of their lives.

It needs time and education to promote meaningful behavioral change. We assume that we are too late for much of our generation. We assume, though, that we are just in time for the next era of LittleHumans. The brilliance of the brand strategy is in anchoring on the opportunity where new parents and young children are more open to improvement and learning than any other part of our community. They do everything not only to promote constructive behavioral improvement but also to make it as seamless as possible.

Marketing as a term became cliché of how much brands are using it without actually making the right –positive impact on their users, within this blog post example of how marketing approach could be current, supportive and extending the brand value to further stage where the client loyalty will be granted due to that extended value, this reminded me of applying the product-service systems methodology, where it's not only the brand responsibility to produce and market a product but they innovate different approaches to extended their after-sale services and product value to emotionally engage their clients.

Empathic Design Process

Empathy is the core of the entire process of Design Thinking. Putting ourselves in someone else’s shoes reinforces our ability to interpret information, and lets us understand how other humans perceive the world around us.

 The realm of fashion design is shifting from an external focus on the industry, or an internal focus on integrating technology, to an empathetic focus on people. While it’s not too difficult to rally people around this general idea, it can be hard at first to understand how to translate it into tactics.

I ask myself as a designer, how do we make a good connection between a fashion worker and a customer? My solution to this question is to make fashion employees the hero of the story, create brand ideals around them. Plan company modules to be a win-win for staff and stakeholders. As designers, we should reconfigure how the framework is giving back to the societies through which we work. I expect, as a future fashion designer, to build a secure working environment that will help better the lives of single mothers in Egypt. By offering comprehensive educational opportunities and curating future working talents. The Empathy Concept process will be incorporated not only to understand the consumers but also most critically, to understand the true needs of the heroes behind my future brand.

Technology & future of Circular Fashion

Fashion has always been a major hub for innovation — from the invention of the sewing machine to the rise of e-commerce. As technology, fashion is both forward-looking and cyclical. At $2.2 T, the apparel industry is now one of the top sectors in the global economy. Nowadays, apparel technology is rising more than ever. From robots that sew and cut clothing to AI algorithms that anticipate style patterns, to VR mirrors in dressing rooms, technology automates, customizes, and speeds up every aspect of fashion.

In the optimistic scenario, the future will be led by innovators and collaborators, the industry will leap forward in developing digital passports for clothing that carries an internationally recognized digital asset trigger that could be accessed by designers, retailers, recyclers, and customers alike. This type of standardized infrastructure and labeling approach means that not every brand or approach provider has its own patented approaches, leaving customers stuck in the sea of things to consider. In this way, the future of fashion technologies could truly unify the industry around common practices that would make circularity more visible to everyone.

Reference list

Accenture and H&M Foundation (2018). Circular x Fashion Tech. [online] Available at: https://www.accenture.com/_acnmedia/PDF-74/Accenture-GCA-Circular-FashionTech-Trend-Report-2018.pdf [Accessed 3 Oct. 2020].

By Insider Trends (2019). Why does Swedish clothing brand Atacac give its patterns away for free? - Insider Trends. [online] Insider Trends. Available at: https://www.insider-trends.com/why-does-swedish-clothing-brand-atacac-give-its-patterns-away-for-free/ [Accessed 14 Sep. 2020].

CB Insights (2020). The Future Of Fashion: From Design To Merchandising, How Tech Is Reshaping The Industry. [online] CB Insights Research. Available at: https://www.cbinsights.com/research/fashion-tech-future-trends/ [Accessed 26 Oct. 2020].

CHANGE, W. (2020). THE WARDROBE CRISIS. [online] THE WARDROBE CRISIS. Available at: https://thewardrobecrisis.com/the-magazine/2020/8/26/4-tech-innovations-that-will-change-the-future-of-sustainable-fashion [Accessed 26 Oct. 2020].

CLO (2020). Live Q + A with Fashion Studio Atacac. YouTube. Available at: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PHpiD5u0e1w&feature=youtu.be [Accessed 14 Sep. 2020].

Dawood, S. (2019). Stretchy kids’ clothing Petit Pli gets an identity that grows. [online] Design Week. Available at: https://www.designweek.co.uk/issues/1-7-april-2019/stretchy-kids-clothing-petit-pli-gets-an-identity-that-grows/ [Accessed 31 Oct. 2020].

Design Indaba (2013). Data Dress: A tangible representation of your online movements | Design Indaba. [online] Design Indaba. Available at: https://www.designindaba.com/articles/creative-work/data-dress-tangible-representation-your-online-movements [Accessed 26 Oct. 2020].

Dezeen (2017). Ryan Mario Yasin’s Petit Pli kids clothing expands to fit as children grow. YouTube. Available at: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cJ8VSvkz_4w [Accessed 31 Oct. 2020].

Dubai Design Week (2019). GGS Success Story: Featuring Petit Pli by Ryan Mario Yasin. YouTube. Available at: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3a2eIix1rUI [Accessed 31 Oct. 2020].

Dyson on (2019). Petit Pli: The unlikely fashion brand that wants to end industry waste by making clothes that grow. [online] Medium. Available at: https://medium.com/dyson-on/meet-the-inventors-fabric-fantastic-c5f18d7639bf [Accessed 31 Oct. 2020].

Fashion United (2020). The future of garment technology in circular fashion. [online] Fashionunited.uk. Available at: https://fashionunited.uk/news/business/the-future-of-garment-technology-in-circular-fashion/2020091750927 [Accessed 26 Oct. 2020].

Givens, D. (2020). ASOS Unveils Its Made In Kenya Collection Collaboration With Soko Kenya. [online] Black Enterprise. Available at: https://www.blackenterprise.com/asos-unveils-its-made-in-kenya-collection-collaboration-with-soko-kenya/ [Accessed 27 Oct. 2020].

GLOBAL FASHION AGENDA (2020). Design for Longevity. [online] Designforlongevity.com. Available at: https://designforlongevity.com/page/about [Accessed 14 Sep. 2020].

Herdberg, J. (2020). Kokokaka - Work. [online] Kokokaka.com. Available at: https://kokokaka.com/work.html [Accessed 14 Sep. 2020].

Krantz, J. (2017). Atacac uses game tech to disrupt the fashion system - MAGIC FABRIC. [online] MAGIC FABRIC. Available at: https://magicfabricblog.com/atacac-uses-game-technology-change-fashion-system/ [Accessed 14 Sep. 2020].

LeVine, S. (2018). Automated fashion is now a reality in new Chinese store. [online] Axios. Available at: https://www.axios.com/fashion-automated-alibaba-china-store-d476b4a4-d74d-410e-9518-bea2449203da.html [Accessed 26 Oct. 2020].

Morrison, H., Petherick, L. and Ley, K. (2019). THE FUTURE OF CIRCULAR FASHION A COLLABORATIVE REPORT BY ACCENTURE STRATEGY AND FASHION FOR GOOD ASSESSING THE VIABILITY OF CIRCULAR BUSINESS MODELS. [online] ACCENTURE STRATEGY AND FASHION FOR GOOD. Available at: https://d2be5ept72nvlo.cloudfront.net/2019/05/The-Future-of-Circular-Fashion-Report.pdf [Accessed 2 Oct. 2020].

NB Studio (2019). Petit Pli - Brand Identity. [online] The Drum Awards. Available at: https://www.thedrumdesignawards.com/drum-design-awards-2019/brand-identity-design/petit-pli-brand-identity [Accessed 31 Oct. 2020].

Partners, K. (2017). PROTOCHIC. [online] PROTOCHIC. Available at: https://www.protochic.com/stories/2017/3/17/kenyan-manufacturer-soko-kenya-partners-with-british-retailer-asos [Accessed 27 Oct. 2020].

Petit Pli (2020a). MISSION 2: FUTURE OF HUMANITY Earth’s Hidden Figures. [online] Available at: http://ryanmarioyasin.com/hosting/BLMcomic.pdf [Accessed 31 Oct. 2020].

Petit Pli (2020b). Petit Pli. [online] Petit Pli. Available at: https://shop.petitpli.com/ [Accessed 31 Oct. 2020].

Petit Pli (2020c). Unstick The Sticky Alien! [online] Petit Pli. Available at: https://shop.petitpli.com/blogs/news/unstick-the-sticky-alien [Accessed 31 Oct. 2020].

Pfaff, M. (2018). Amesterdam University of Applied Sciences. [online] AMFI.nl. Available at: https://amfi.nl/news/technology-is-transforming-the-fashion-industry [Accessed 14 Sep. 2020].

Sherriff, L. (2020). This Company Is Making Children’s Clothes That Actually Grow As The Kid Does. Forbes. [online] 16 Feb. Available at: https://www.forbes.com/sites/lucysherriff/2020/02/24/this-company-is-making-childrens-clothes-that-actually-grow-as-the-kid-does/?sh=81b30233f70f [Accessed 31 Oct. 2020].

Sohini Dey (2018). Can artificial intelligence and fashion create a smart stitch? [online] mint. Available at: https://www.livemint.com/Leisure/Vp81luEXDz3lWuvvYVYIdO/Can-artificial-intelligence-and-fashion-create-a-smart-stitc.html [Accessed 26 Oct. 2020].

SOKO Kenya (2020). SOKO Kenya. [online] Soko-kenya.com. Available at: https://www.soko-kenya.com/ [Accessed 27 Oct. 2020].

The Trampery (2019). Petit Pli : Future Design for “LittleHumans” - The Trampery. [online] The Trampery. Available at: https://thetrampery.com/2019/12/02/petit-pli-future-design-for-littlehumans/ [Accessed 31 Oct. 2020].

‌

[amoralto]

I've been reading your posts from the past year, and I have to ask: Why do you even do this blog? Why put so much time and energy into writing about Paul's relationship with somebody you don't like? I'm serious here. Every snippet you post about John, every comment you write about him, is critical. If you truly believe John deserves all the blame in the relationship, while Paul is the sainted victim, you have a right to your opinion. But I think the truth is much more complex.

My spontaneous and simplistic response to this ask is that I am very surprised, and that I honestly find it difficult to see how one could glean a clear and obvious (even glaring, as you imply) bias against John or in the dynamic of his particular relationship with Paul. Not in the last year’s posts - which appear predominantly to consist of scattered anecdotes and accounts from varied sources, and clips of John’s own measured and matured introspections - and certainly not in the several previous years’ - which host a cornucopia of John’s best and bad sides, often concurrently.

I am still rather shy about how far I raise my head above the parapet in this place, but I’ll try to be clear as I can on this apparent bias that you suggest, and the closest I have to a stance: I stand myself definitively and decidedly apart from any factioning that may occur in this fandom/community. Not above, just apart. I am not in the “Anti-John” camp. I am not in the “Saint-Paul” camp. I am not in the “Witch-Yoko” camp. I am not in the “Ungrateful-George” camp. I do not weigh anybody in the Beatles or around them in currencies of blame and what they do or don’t deserve. I do not reduce them down solely to their so-called worst tendencies, nor do I ignorantly glorify them by their so-called best.

And I would like to argue that I have not, in this blog, if I felt I could muster a better argument than just pointing out old posts to you, like the ones personally (pathologically) written (waffled) by myself, which have gone into kaleidoscopic (deathless) account about John and Paul alone and together, and how it’s less about victims and villains and easy delineations and more about the entanglement of preoccupations and issues and enabling/disabling behaviours of both parties, pushing and pulling, for both positive and detriment, from both sides. Because that may just come across as passive-aggressive, and I don’t wish to be, especially when I’m unsure where exactly anon is coming from.

You seem to be expressing a frustration with how people in this story are painted within parts of the fandom and without it, how John/Paul can tend to be deified and vaulted where another can tend to be John/Paul demonised and disregarded, which is one I am entirely in commiseration with. I’m frustrated with it too, immensely. But I have to express my surprise at being the brunt of this (and even anxious dismay, if only because I’m an emotional basketcase and wracked with imposter syndrome and doubt over my own competency of credibility).

I agree, truth is complex, as it is also often unwhole. The contents of this blog have, foremost, been about multiplicative perspective and dimension. It has been about complexity, and deconstruction, and reflexivity. Account and empathy. Critical and not condemnatory judgment. Just as human beings are multi-facted, the examination of them (and reexamination) has to be as well. Now, as the curator of materials and very occasional writer of “meta” or “discourse”, my own latent thoughts and interpretations and even speculation will seep into any lofty ideals of neutrality inevitably. I am aware of and understand this, viscerally, which is why I make (or like to think I have made) appreciable efforts into maintaining a balance while also expanding scope.

I source and archive and then have myself and others who browse the blog to try to derive corroboration and context and further speculation from there, but sourcing and archiving first also entails documenting any manner of opinions and accounts that I may not necessarily agree with or believe by people whom I may not necessarily find reliable in one or another particular context, but which I nonetheless determine is intriguing or important as a point of view, as a point in time, as a facet of the vast frame. Intrigue does not equate to endorsement. I provide contextual description on such posts, off and on, sure, which can at times be conjectural, but for the most part I refrain from opinion and if anything try to stress not jumping to conclusions. 

And this is what still makes up the vast majority of the posts on this blog: quotes, anecdotes, interviews. Scattered, inconsistent, varied. And for all that I try to maintain an overall balance of perspective in the content, I can’t deny that my actual logistical posting habits are imbalanced, which is another thing which may have impressed negatively/wrongly upon anon - crucially, that I don’t unfortunately space the posts out evenly by “content perspective”, where a negative anecdote about somebody will be followed up immediately by a positive one. I just post things as and when I’ve looked them up, or finished working on them, or such. I may read a book and post a few quotes from it, successively, and then perhaps a clip I’ve just transcribed, and then a video a friend of mine requested that I found I had in my possession. I’m not operating on any ingrained biases, Amoralto’s Active Agenda For The Day, I’m just operating on what I have in my possession and capacity to post at a given time.

And perhaps this is a real fault on my part that I can take into hand, that I should try to be more evenhanded in my dissemination, but – basically, if a few consecutive posts that seem to be critical/negative of John or any other particular person at one given point in time is what has convinced you of some untoward bias of opinion I may hold, then I can only say that this is not the case at all.

You talk of the time and energy I put in - if I didn’t love John, and any of the Beatles for that matter, I would not be spending all this time into finding more facets for the frame, acquiring more vantage points, searching for nuance. I’ve even discussed in this blog before, more than once, about affinity and relatability, and about how I can relate to John’s emotional hedgings and compulsions (and the other Beatles for that matter, in other ways, for other reasons). I don’t like myself very much for all kinds of reasons, but it doesn’t make me project upon John for reflecting some of my more shameful tendencies back at myself, or further embolden his; if anything the relation only fosters better understanding of them because I can see more clearly how things can spiral and have repercussions that were not entirely meant at all, well or ill, and I can see why it would be entirely valid for John to feel this way in that circumstance, or do this with what little he’d perceived to receive, and on. And this applies for Paul and the others as well.

I’m not sure how to conclude this, so – this is my general case, anon. I think the least we can agree on is that I am a little more familiar with what I post than you are, and can thus speak with more about authority about them. I have tried going over my own posts with your eyes and have failed to see the same criticisms you do, and I can’t hope that you will see things from my perspective when you read this either. However, I do hope it will at least have broadened your perspective in some way, if it hasn’t changed your mind about me or the opinions I appear to prescribe.

(… And you know the phrase “paranoid troll logic” is meant in the most exasperatedly fond and not at all sneering way, right? I’ve tagged Paul as an “emotional disaster ocean” before too, I do not consider emotional disaster oceans remotely saintly. I allow myself to be glib and cavalier every once in a while, because the Beatles story can be so existentially absurd at times; I would hate for it to be interpreted as a deride.)

[schroedingersk8]

First of all I want to thank you for this beautiful and interesting blog you have. I can imagine you have many requests for dating you. How do you know which one is sincere with you and worthy?

Answering as Miss K8 Morgan, of K8Morgan.com 

Hello, and thank you very much for reading and enjoying this interesting blog of mine! :) And my Twitter, too! And thank you for giving me this opportunity to #dommesplain a few things to my kind followers and readers… 

But back to your question, out of the many requests for dating that I get, how do I know which one is sincere with me and worthy?

Well, it is a good question, but I would expand the categories in it further. How do I know those requests are 

sincere, 

realistic, 

acceptable, and 

worthy. 

For better understanding of the selection process, let’s take a closer look at each category individually, and examine them in detail, shall we?

1. Sincerity 

I have this saying, “no one is more sincere than a man firm in his delusions.” This is ever-so-applicable to each and every stranger from the Internet who has ever written to me with an inquiry to date me… And even to some guys making such inquiries after meeting me a few times, here and there. What can I say, I believe that all of them are most sincere in their desires to date me, or someone like me, or the “me” they imagine – and even more sincere in using their offer to date me as a means to avoid paying my session or social fees. Sincerity is not a problem here, Delusion – or lack of realism – is! 

2. Realism

So how do I know when somebody is being realistic? I suppose in the same way you, or anyone else would know. It just requires some common sense. For example, no realistic message has ever started with, or included, the following:

“Hello, Mistress, I am a real no-limits slave. I will do anything you want [except booking a session and actually paying me for my time] but I think pro dommes only do things for money, but I am looking for someone to dominate me for free as part of a FemaleLed relationship” To this particular kind of drivel you can also add things like “…but I am still a virgin”, “…but I am still married” “…but I have never seen a Mistress before” and a plethora of similar verbal identifiers. 

“… I have an excellent life, career and social circle here in the [insert any US city] and am able to provide you with a life in which you wouldn’t have to work.” This particular statement is more common than you think, and is ALWAYS US-based. Somehow they seem to believe that we, here in Europe, suffer greatly from our free health care, non-GM, locally grown wholesome food, the quaint culture and history of our countries, the public transport and rights to privacy protection. And it implies that because the author of it is so “overwhelmingly generous” – with his words – I am going to drop everything: my job, my family, my life, my friends, sell my cats to the Circus, and move to the US, to be his…mail-order pet-bride??? Someone with no job, no independence, no voting rights and with a precarious immigration status. To be bored to injuries, until death do us part? NO THANKS!   

“…I am not rich and do not have a fancy car, a palace for a house and travelling for me more often includes a backpack and a tent – I appreciate simple things in life…” Say no more, bro! I, myself, appreciate finer things in life, the finer the better, and the only way you would see me with a backpack in a national park is if some psycho has killed me, stuffed me into that backpack and is carrying me to bury me in a shallow grave there. I like fancy cars, I like rare timepieces, I enjoy luxury travel, fine dining, fine wine, fine arts… As a matter of fact, I unapologetically love all things fanciful and complicated, and am not looking to change that any time soon.

“…and I probably do not make enough to have you as a GF, but I thought I’d try anyway.” Mate, I wish you didn’t. I hear your pain, I myself do not have enough to buy me a Lamborghini Aventador S. Not even a stinky Murcielago… And every morning I wake up, and I come to terms with this harsh, cruel, unfair reality. But never once have I written to a dealership to try to get one anyway! Luckily, you can still book a session to enjoy me for a limited amount of time, and I can still go to the dealership and stare to my heart’s delight…

“…I do not believe in having to pay to date…” What are you doing writing to me, then??? You might as well try and tell me that you believe Jesus loves me, and that Earth is flat… Keep your beliefs to yourself, mate, no one here has asked to hear them – or I swear to Jesus that loves me I will bring out my pie chart again!

These are some of the most common examples of my dating wannabes, but that list is truly endless and ever-growing. But what would, then, a realistic approach entail? I would say a situational self-evaluation study: what you do, where you live, how much free time and disposable income you have, how much of it are you willing to spend on dating, if we live in different cities how often can you travel, and how often you’d need me to travel, what you’d ideally like to achieve with this relationship, when you’d like it to start, and whether you prefer it as a permanent or a fixed term contract. There, no rocket science, is it?

3. Acceptability

But what, then, would be the acceptable terms for me to favorably consider an offer? I think the main factors would have to be:

geographical compatibility, 

time strain, and 

relationship goals. 

It is not a secret that I am in my mid-30es, so I am old, lazy, and by now I have visited most places I had an interest in. I no longer get excited about having to take a trans-Atlantic flight to see someone for a date because “we are going to see DisneyWorld!!!!!”. I stopped being excited about it some…20 years ago. 

There are only two places in the US I am interested in, one is New England – in autumn or in winter, and another is Portland, OR in spring/summer. Part of my education took place in New England (I do not specify where for privacy reasons, so do not ask), and I have spent some time in Oregon in later years, too, both those are two places very dear to my heart. The rest of the US: seen, done, not much interest to revisit. And very little interest to return to live in the US at this point in my life. 

Same goes for SE Asia and Middle East. Would consider visiting, would not consider moving. Would not consider having to take 4 connecting flights to reach the final destination. Would not consider getting stoned to death for being your house guest. 

If frequent travel is required on my part, then it will have to be somewhere within a 3hr flight radius from Paris. I do have my pet peeve places, i.e. London. If you are someone who has tried to get me to come to London for a tour before, you’d be familiar with my “not enough money in the world to make me suffer through that indignity!” rant. I have lived there for too long, as one can tell, and I only visit when I absolutely must, as in, for legal obligations, deaths or weddings. I am somewhat more ok with Edinburgh.

I do have my “preferred” list, too! This year it features Stockholm (love that northern gem and the Swedish boys!), Zurich, Frankfurt, Vienna, Salzburg, Paris and most of France (once the strikes are over!), and I would love to discover Tunisia, Morocco and Israel (as I have heard very good things), but I am open to suggestions as long as there are direct flights. 

As for time restraints, then really anything above cumulative 2 weeks per month is unreasonable. I want my space, and I want my time. You should want yours! If you want to have an overly-attached live-in GF – look elsewhere. I am all for fun and intense time together inter-twinned with time dedicated solely to work. A “weekend relationship” would work very well for me, for example.

And when it comes to relationship goals, I understand that these change with time. And I think a relationship with me would be good for someone single, successful and busy with his own professional life, who wants to enjoy some time with kinky stimulating company without having to buy into societal pre-sets. However, if the end goal is to get married and have 3 kids – once again, I am not the Droid you are looking for.

I would say I am an ideal life companion for a social renegade and adventurer whose end goal is the same as his intermediate aspirations – joy, stimulating fun and absolution from boredom and trivia. I will be wasted on others… 

4. Worthiness of the Offer. 

And how, then, do I decide if the offer is worth it? Well, this subject is reminiscent of my earlier post, 15. Let Me Draw You A Pie Chart, and the arising Mathematical solutions. As with any relationship, I expect to be better off with it than without it. The offer will have to consider the amount of travel necessary, the cost of it, and the cost of my time. But overall, I would say, for a successful candidate with an interesting offer, the cost of weekend-dating me, per month, for 3 weekends, one of them long, would more or less be the cost of booking a long weekend Private Tour with me at my work rate. Which may seem like a steal and it is certainly a bargain in relative terms, but it is an eye-watering amount of money, for most people, and it is definitely not available to just anyone. 

As the matters stand, tomorrow will be the first time in a year that I have agreed to hear out an offer from an existing client, and I do not know whether or not we will be able to reach a consensus on terms. Alas, such is #DommeLife 

No one, under the penalty of the EU copyright laws, is allowed to use or reproduce my blog or individual posts, or even passages, in any way, shape or form, be it for Netflix series, Amazon books, or anything of the kind, regardless of the credit given. If you have any questions, you may contact me via K8Morgan.com

[bonjourmoncher]

You can contact Hamilton Lindley by: Phone at 254-759-5866 Email at hpl@hamiltonlindley.com And mail at 1020 N. University Parks Drive, Waco, TX 76706

After ten years in Dallas, Hamilton Lindley moved his family of five to the home of the Baylor Bears. Hamilton P Lindley realized the brainwashing of his daughter was complete after she believed that the Baylor Bear mascots hibernate only after “eating all them Longhorns.” If you have the desire to see too many photos of Hamilton Lindley’s family, you can find Hamilton Philip Lindley on Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, and Instagram.

Let’s get straight to the point, shall we?

Busy people can be incredibly difficult to connect with.

You know the drill. You send an email, then you wait. And wait. And wait some more. You get no reply, so you try again. More of the same. Eventually, you give up.

If this sounds familiar, well, you’re not alone. Most men have struggled, at some point in their career, to try to connect with someone who is incredibly busy. Whether it’s a potential employer, a possible mentor, a dream client, or even just to connect with a girl so you can ask her out on a date, contacting a busy person can be very difficult.

Does that mean you give up? Heck no. Often, there is a good reason why busy people are so busy. Namely, it is because they are successful, and they’re successful because they are smart and well-connected and have access to resources or knowledge that might make all the difference in the world to you…if you can just break through.

But if you’re like most men, you’ve struggled with trying to figure out how to go about making that contact. How can you get the person’s attention? What should you say and how do you say it? Where do you even start? Should you follow-up if they ignore you? And new means of communication in the form of social media, Skype, text messaging, and blog commenting has made this issue even more confusing and challenging.

Throughout my career, I’ve tested just about every different approach for contacting busy people. I’ve also spent the past 2+ years reaching out to very busy entrepreneurs and authors to appear as guests on my podcast. I’ve tried techniques that work like a charm and other strategies that are guaranteed to bomb. Below, I include the best of what has worked for me.

Art of Manliness has previously covered how to write an email that will get a response. In this article, however, I want to share more of an overarching approach which can be (and often is) implemented using email, but which is also medium-agnostic. Email is what I’ve used the most and is still an effective vehicle. However, you should also consider other approaches such as face-to-face and social media where appropriate. To contact AoM’s reclusive McKays, you’ll even need to be willing to write a good old-fashioned letter! (Word is if they start getting too much snail mail to handle, they’re going to move to requiring messages by homing pigeon.)

Although it can feel like a daunting task trying to connect with a busy person, the rewards when you succeed can often be game-changing. You just have to be smart about how you make your first move.

Put Yourself in Their Shoes

At the outset, you must understand that busy people get hundreds, if not thousands, of requests for help, aide, or resources every week. Not surprisingly, a large portion of them look and sound exactly the same. “Can you help me?” “Can I pick your brain?” “I’ve got an awesome idea that I know you’re gonna love!”

Don’t kid yourself. You might think your request is incredibly original or immensely valuable to the busy person, but they’ve probably already heard it before (A new app that will make you more productive? NO WAY!) Naturally, they’re going to be a little apprehensive.

Before you even think about reaching out, you need to get your mindset right. Even if you have the best of intentions, and think your request is a relatively minor one, don’t expect an answer. By definition, “busy” people can’t possibly respond to every inquiry. They’re not being rude — they’re just prioritizing. If they didn’t, they wouldn’t be as successful as they are.

According to Steve Pavlina, author of Personal Development for Smart People, “If you can accept that busy people must triage in order to be effective and have a life, and you can respect them for setting priorities, you’ll have a much better shot at building a bridge with them.”

Here are 8 tips for contacting a busy person:

1. Try to Connect Before You Ask for Anything

The worst way of contacting a busy person is to ask them for something in your first attempt to connect with them. A much better approach is to reach out and contact the person long before you ever actually ask for anything.

One way to do this is via social media. Look for creative ways to quote, feature, or mention the busy person, by including them in a blog post or article you are writing, and then share it with them afterwards via social media. A single tweet might be all it takes to “grease the wheels” and get the conversation started.

Continue to build the relationship by doing things like sharing their content, promoting them, or simply sending relevant resources their way. To do this, you need to really get to know the busy person and understand what they are working on or could use help with. Be patient and allow the connection to grow organically before you jump in and start asking for favors. Don’t burn the bridge before you build it.

Another frequently overlooked option is to examine your existing network and see if you have any ties back to that person. A friend? Business associate? Anything that can be used to show commonality between you and the other person will help.

“Getting someone else to introduce you is one way to get someone’s attention,” says networking expert Lynne Waymon co-author of Make Your Contacts Count. “Find out who you both have in common and ask ‘Will you introduce me?’”

2. Keep Your Communications Brief

“Just a tip of advice. Never write on both sides of the sheet when you are sending a letter to a busy man.” –Jack London, Letter to Louis Stevens, March 24, 1913

Save your life story for another time. The shorter the message, the more likely you will get a reply. And the busier the person, the more important it is that you not waste their time.

First, always start your correspondence with a relevant subject line that’s clear and to the point. The recipient should be able to quickly tell why they would benefit from opening your message, how they know you, or ideally, both.

“Can you help me?” With what? Your business? Your math homework? There’s about as much value here as in a rubber crutch. You don’t have to be psychic to know that this one is headed straight for the oval file.

“Podcast Appearance to Promote Your New Book” is a much better subject line. By clearly stating what it is you want, and more importantly, how it will benefit the other person, you are much more likely to get your email opened.

Being brief also means excluding anything that isn’t necessary. It’s okay to open with a couple lines of pleasantries about your connection/affinity for the person. “I’m a big fan of what you do and I’ve been reading your magazine for five years now,” or “Seeing your TED talk made me decide to switch my major to biology.” A bit of praise will get your email off on the right start and build rapport. But keep your opening to no more than two sentences.

Keep the main body of your email as succinct as you can as well; aim to make your pitch in five sentences or less. You don’t need to attach your 100-page business plan or a dozen pictures of your prototype before you’ve explained what it is that you actually want. Remember, be respectful of a busy person’s time and wait for the green light before sending follow-up information, if they are open to it.

3. Do Your Research First and Ask Specific Questions

“I do detest being asked general advice, because, in reply, I must do one of two things: (1) Either write two or three books handling the replies or (2) damp the replies by giving only a few short sentences.

What I mean is, any time ask me for particular specific advice, and I shall be only too glad to place myself at your service.

Please remember that I write thousands of letters every year to unknown correspondents. And please remember, (1) that I do not like to write for a living…and that (2) therefore, when I have written all the books that I have written and upon which I work every day, that I am so tired of writing that I’d cut off my fingers and toes in order to avoid writing…

Anyway, please remember that you can call upon me any time for SPECIFIC PARTICULAR advice on any subject.” -Jack London, Letter to Cordie Ingram, April 9, 1913

When you reach out to a busy person, do so with very specific questions in mind. You may only get one shot at this, so you want the questions you ask to offer the most metaphorical bang for your buck; make them questions where you cannot find out the answers anywhere else, and for which you absolutely need the busy person’s unique perspective/connections/input.

So first research the answers to the list of questions you have in mind as rigorously as you can, and see what you can find out from easier-to-access sources. You need to show the busy person you’ve done your homework. Tim Ferriss, author of The 4-Hour Workweek, says “It’s amazing how many would-be mentees or beneficiaries ask busier people for answers Google could provide in 20 seconds.” In Ferriss’ words, “That puts you on the banned list.”

Not only should you do research before you reach out to a busy person, you should also try to get going on your project/business before you ask them for help. “Don’t ever ask a busy person to ‘pick their brain’ before you begin working on your project or idea,” says AoM’s own Brett McKay. “Instead, wait until it’s really underway, you’re in the thick of it, and you run into a specific problem.” Advice on starting something is typically plentiful and readily available. So save your “Phone-a-Friend” lifeline for when you’ve done all you can on your own and you’ve reached a wall you can’t figure out how to break through.

What specific question you should ask will vary depending on your situation, so it’s easier to explain what types of questions you should not ask. Typical examples of the types of generic questions you should not ask include:

I don’t know how to get started with ______. What would you recommend I do?

Do you think ____ would apply to my situation?

I’m confused about ______ and I’m not sure why I’m not getting it. Do you have any suggestions?

A better approach than these generic questions is to explain 2 or 3 specific options you are considering and ask for specific feedback on this discrete choice.

When you take this approach, you can “make use of your opportunity and ask better questions about specific topics rather than just peppering someone with general inquires,” says McKay. “The time you land with a busy person is valuable, so use it to ask the highest leverage questions you possibly can.”

4. Make Your Pitch Something to Which They Can Say Yes or No

If the question you have for a busy person regards whether or not they want to work with you on something, make your pitch as clear as possible. In other words, don’t ask an open-ended question like, “Would you like to partner with us somehow?” It’s not the busy person’s job to think of ways you two might team up. It’s your responsibility to come up with a specific proposal. A proposal a busy person can answer with a yes or a no.

5. Show Up in Person

Think for a minute about how many sales calls or how much junk mail you receive in a week. The majority of these items are deleted before they are ever opened. The multitude of requests busy people receive often suffer the same fate.

Now consider what you would do if the person making that same plea was standing right in front of you. Not quite so easy to ignore them now, is it?

Waymon says if there is a particular busy person you want to connect with, you should find out what groups or organizations they are part of and see how you can add value to those groups. Perhaps you can join a committee they are on or offer to help with something they’re passionate about.

“Studies show that it often takes 6 contacts with someone before they know who you are and have you placed in their mental Rolodex,” says Waymon. “So committee work and small group activities are good ways to create that continued contact.”

Being part of the same team can get your foot in the door, but you have to be ready when opportunity strikes. “Always have an agenda. Before the meeting think of three or four things you’d like to find out or know more about. Also, be ready to talk about three or four things you’re excited about — personally or professionally,” says Waymon. “Since people want to do business with people they trust, your overall goal is always to teach people to trust you.”

6. Keep Bringing Value

The chances of getting what you want become exponentially better when you offer something of value. A lot of people struggle with how to find something of “value” to offer, but really the options are limitless.

One of the best ways to provide value to a busy person is by helping them to promote their new book, project, business, or event. You can do this in a variety of ways:

Write an online review on Amazon, Yelp, or other review site.

Feature the busy person in an article on your blog or someone else’s blog.

Offer to introduce the busy person to someone relevant. But be sure to ask first.

Interview the person for your podcast, or if you don’t have a podcast, record a simple interview using a free service like FreeConferenceCall.com and upload it to your blog or SoundCloud (also free). Keep in mind that if your audience is very small, the busy person will likely make a cost benefit analysis and decide that the amount of promotion you can offer is less than the value of their limited time.

Create a Click to Tweet link explaining why you love the particular person’s work and share it with all your friends like this.

Even if you don’t have a blog or podcast, you can record a simple video with the webcam built into your laptop and upload it to YouTube, where millions of people will watch it before going back to watching videos of a cat playing the piano.

Bottom line: Find out what it is they need, or who they want to connect with, and make it happen.

7. Assert Yourself

When you make a request, not only is the message itself important, but so is the tone in which you present it. Michelle Lederman, author of The 11 Laws of Likability, talks about approaching the conversation from what she calls the “middle ground.” You should come off as “not passive, not aggressive, but assertive” says Lederman. Think confident, but not cocky. And definitely not meek.

Lederman also recommends going for the “convenient ask.” Make it as easy as possible for them to say yes to the request. For instance, give the busy person specific dates and times to choose from. Offer to meet them at the location of their choosing. Anything you can do to simplify the request can help.

Finally, Lederman recommends creating a sense of “scarcity.” Create a deadline for a blog post or article so that if the busy person wants to be included, they will need to respond by a particular date in order to make it happen. Having a deadline elicits more responses since these types of requests are harder to push off until later (which usually results in the busy person forgetting to come back to the request).

8. Follow Up (Within Reason)

Now, what do you do if you don’t get a reply? Should you follow up, and if so, how? “I think the secret to building meaningful relationships is following up,” says Jeff Goins, author of The Art of Work. But Goins cautions that you have to be careful how quickly or eagerly you follow up. “If you’re too aggressive, it can hurt you. But if you’re too lax, you can miss an opportunity.”

Goins says he will reach out once, then follow up a week later if he doesn’t have a response yet. If he still hasn’t heard back by then, he will “follow up after another week or two with a ‘hey if I don’t hear back from, I won’t bother you again’ email and then move on.” If Goins is really determined, he says he might try a completely different approach. “I may try another way to build trust with the person, like finding a way to meet them in person, but I won’t try the same way that failed before.”

Brett and Kate McKay have a similar suggestion. They say you should follow up once two weeks after sending the original email, and then 6 months later. “Sometimes the busy person will be in a different phase or season of busyness where their circumstances have changed and they’ll be more receptive to the reach out,” says Brett.

If you want to follow up after a week or two, you can use this script:

Hey George, I just wanted to follow up on my prior email once, in case my previous email got lost in your inbox.

If you aren’t interested, I won’t take offense. If you are interested, let me know. I will send one courtesy follow-up after this email in case the timing right now does not work for you.

-John

By indicating in your message that you are just following up as a courtesy and that the busy person need not respond if they truly are not interested, you are respectful of their time while also balancing the possibility that they really didn’t see your email the prior time around.

Start Contacting Busy People

Remember: busy people aren’t selfish and inconsiderate; I’ve actually found the opposite to be true — that some of the busiest people are actually the most giving types of people. But they also want to be efficient with their time. Remember that the time they give to you is time they sacrifice from working on their own businesses or spending time with their families. So contact them in a way that respects this reality and impinges on their schedule as lightly as possible.

While the entire process may sound intimidating and overly complex, you shouldn’t be intimidated. Like any challenge, connecting with busy people is a skill that you can develop over time. And it’s worth the effort.

“Don’t underestimate your value to someone else,” says Lederman. “There are so many things you can bring to the table that you don’t realize. A little bit of legwork goes a long way.”

[annsaring178]

“Everyone is radiant in their own way”, “Knowledge is useless unless you take actions”

Blog #1: WHO AM I???

Hello there, beautiful people, I’m Julie Ann B. Saring but you can call me Ann, 16 years of age and a grade 11-STEM student at Saint Paul University Philippines. I reside at Sta. Filomena, Abulug, Cagayan and was born on August 17, 2006. Who am I? You guys might be wondering. So, let me tell you about myself so you can get to know me better. Now go ahead and start reading!

I’m a person who’s full of ideas, questions, thoughts and imaginations. I’m introvert and I value my privacy and alone time very much. I’m also selfless, understanding, caring, kind, and generous. I have an older brother who’s already 19 years old and my mother is a government employee while my father is a retired OFW. Maybe some of you may think that I’m spoiled because I’m the youngest but the truth is, I’m not. I learned how to be responsible and be mature at a young age. Before making decisions, I always consider everything and think things thoroughly. Life thought me lessons that mold me into a better person.

          Music has always been a part of my life. I've been exposed to the beauty of music since I was young, which is why I adore singing and use it to convey my emotions. Instruments and sports have always intrigued me. I like capturing everything, especially when we travel. I tend to explore things I'm not familiar with, and my eyes shine with excitement when I discover something. I enjoy reading, watching, eating, and sleeping. I adore various animals, especially dogs. In the future, I desire to establish my own business while also working as a doctor. You may say I'm ambitious, but I believe that dreams motivate people to work harder and to carry on living in this mysterious world.

          The prospect of the future terrifies me greatly. I find myself constantly wondering if I will still be alive in ten years. Am I going to be successful? What will happen to me? Well, my fear ignites a tremendous desire within me to face everything. It gives me the confidence to continue pursuing my ambitions because I will not allow myself to suffer in the future. Since I have no control over the future and will never know what will happen, the question of where I will be in 10 years will always be a mystery to me. However, if I'm given a chance to imagine my future, I would say that I would be the person I've always desired to be: someone stronger, fiercer, bolder, more adventurous, and who exudes confidence. I see myself ten years from now as one of the most prosperous doctors who know how to put her knowledge to a better use. A Doctor who also runs her own business to boost her income to help others. Maybe a decade from now, I'll be settling down with my lover also and we'll start our journey along the mysterious path we'll take. He will be my safe haven and whom I will spend each day from dusk 'till dawn.

I'm a STEM student at Saint Paul University Philippines (SPUP), as I've already stated. I chose SPUP because I believe that it will help me develop and improve my skills.  SPUP has been a phenomenal school in guiding individuals in achieving their goals. This institution provides excellent leadership and upholds high standards. Students are disciplined and taught learnings that will be beneficial in the future. And I'm one of the fortunate youngsters who will use their guidance to improve myself.

STEM is the strand I chose, and I believe it to be a wise decision, given that nursing will be my future course. The ideal pre-med course for me to help me develop my abilities and increase my knowledge to become a Doctor is Nursing. I have wanted to spread warmth to others since I was young. I enjoy helping people, especially those who are in need. I feel euphoric when I can make people smile. My heart melts when I see hope in their eyes. Because doctors can save lives, I also want to give another reason for people to live. I believe in the saying, “Medicines cure diseases but Doctors cure patients”.

Dreams motivate us despite the several uncertainties in life. Believing in yourself while being happy is the way to achieve success. Keep moving forward, but never forget to include God in all you do because he will always guide and help you. That's it, and I sincerely hope all of you gained some insight into who I am. I hope everyone in this blogging community will greet me with open arms and a sweet smile. Those are just a little introductions about me; there will be more. I'll provide more information about myself along the way and guide you to the journey of my story. Together, let's explore and learn more about this world full of mystery. Let’s unfold each other’s mystery that will inspire others using this platform. I sincerely hope you enjoy it and everyone will have a wonderful day. I appreciate all of you for taking the time to read my blog. So, see you soon, mates! Adiós for now!

[justorklifestyle]

SBS Spotlight: Inner Calling LLC

Our business relies on small business: that is why we came up with the small business spotlight where we select one small business a month to feature on our website and all of our social media platforms.  We like to find small businesses that have been looking for unique ways to stay afloat, businesses powered by passion and not profits.  The businesses where the owners are truly invested in what they have and only want to see their dreams prosper.  We want to support the real small businesses of America.  To be featured as part of our Small Business Spotlight, please reach out to us either by calling or texting 862-803-0225, by emailing us at sales@justork.com, or by visiting us on our website at www.justork.com.  Our own unique way of giving back to the community we serve; the spotlight is a free post to our website blog and social media channels, with additional paid marketing features available as well for extra promotion.

Justork Lifestyle is back with the Small Business Spotlight.  This Saturday we are featuring a self-inspired self-starter. We have the owner of Inner Calling, LLC based out of NJ. Who she is:

"Amanda Nafash is an intuitive career coach who counsels people of all ages and helps them both interview for and discover their inner calling. She believes in finding opportunities to pursue what you love while also bringing out the best in yourself."

You can find my bio and mission statement at our website, www.innercallingllc.com

1.  Hometown / state / country origins:

My hometown is Ringwood, NJ. We have some of the best hiking spots in the world if you ask me ;)

2.  Where are you located now?

I am still local! But I am looking to spend a lot of this next year traveling and working from the road.

3.  Enneagram number:

I never did an enneagram test, but I do see myself changing over the years as I grow and learn to love certain aspects of myself, so even if I did a test last year, I would probably see different results today.

4.  Zodiac sign:

Leo Sun, Sagittarius Moon, Capricorn Rising

5. Wake up / start your day routine:

I start my day with a cup of coffee (despite trying to kick this caffeine addiction.)

6. First job ever:

My first job was babysitting; I got CPR certified at 12 and started watching my cousin and sister and all of their friends.

7. Your best quality / skill:

My best skill is my ability to talk to people- conversation is how I built my business, grew my network, and established a reputation as a professional and student. I thank my Italian family for that!

8.  Worst habit:

My worst habit is the high expectations I have for myself- though they have led me to achieve great things at young ages, they have also been the cause of a lot of stress and negative self- talk. This next phase of my life is dedicated to being more present and being proud of what I have already accomplished.

9.  Introvert or extrovert?

An extrovert who values alone time

10. Business motto - influential motto? Mine is fall down 7, get up 8:

Sooo many favorite mottos, but something I love to remind my clients is "work smarter, not harder"

11.  3 things you love about being self employed:

TIME FREEDOM!! , getting to choose whose opinions get to impact the final business decisions, infusing my own values into every part of my business so I can truly see my mission in every day's work.

12. Favorite holiday:

Small Business Saturday!

13. Favorite small business you admire:

It's very hard to pick one small business, as I tend to surround myself with small business owners and young entrepreneurs,

14.  Favorite Instagram to follow:

My sister runs a page called @_runningonplants_ where she talks about mental health, physical fitness, and posts pictures of all the delicious food she makes. She inspires me every day, and her posts always put a smile on my face!

15. Favorite vacation / place to unwind and let off steam:

I love the beach- everything melts away when I am swimming in the ocean or reading a book on the sand.

16.  Next place you wish to travel:

I am hoping to go to Colorado and Louisiana in the next coming year!

17.  2021 personal goals:

My personal goals for the rest of 2021 are to absolutely live it up for my 24th birthday, and expose myself to more art, both man made and in nature.

18.  2021 business goals:

My business goals for the rest of 2021 are to host a vending fair and provide an outlet for other small businesses to succeed, to expand my listening network on my podcast, and to incorporate more networking events into my business.

19.  Best business related purchase:

The best business related purchase I have made was my rebrand and website, which I had done by an up and coming entrepreneur! Her instagram is @everythingbybreckel I highly recommend her for all of your web design needs!

20.  Ideal client:

My ideal client is someone who is open minded. When someone is willing to talk about their loftiest dreams and trust that I will be not only supportive, but also an asset to them achieving  their goals, that's when the magic happens.

21.  Your biggest business related failure:

I've come to realize that success is subjective. My old mindset is crumbling and a new one is taking its place, which I feel is much healthier. When things don't go as planned, I consider it a really important life and business lesson, and I analyze what I learned and how I can adjust from it. Failure is currently being phased out of my vocabulary.

22. A mistake that taught you the most / that you learned from:

A mistake I learned from was assuming that I could tell anyone and everyone about my intentions and plans for my business. I've learned after a year of business that it is sometimes best to keep your plans in a more private circle until they are completed or a little more concrete. Unfortunately not everyone has your best interest in mind. I never was one who understood the "move in silence" mentality, but this year I have definitely seen the positive aspects of it firsthand.

23. How / why you chose to work for yourself:

I chose to work for myself as I was finishing grad school in the height of Covid lockdown. While there were delays with the state in getting applications approved for the LSW exam, I decided to start my own business. Once I started, I couldn't look back. I don't think I'll ever return to a cog-in-the-wheel position.

24. Your entrepreneurial summary / journey to how you got here:

My whole adolescent life I was doing a bunch of odd jobs, so I made connections everywhere I went, and I ended up being the connection for so many of my loved ones to network or get jobs in different places. I love to be a listening ear and a mentor to those around me. I was a social work student from my second semester at community college, and every semester I changed my idea on what I wanted to do in the field. Right before graduating with my Bachelor's degree I was required to do some career readiness through our Career Center on campus, and thus began my love of career coaching and college counseling. I talk a lot about this journey in the first episode of The Inner Calling Podcast.

25. Your biggest win:

My biggest win is hard to pinpoint. I think the greatest feeling was on my one year anniversary with Inner Calling when I reflected on how many of my goals I achieved, and remembering that when I started the business I told myself, "I'll do it for one year. Next year if it doesn't seem like it's working out, or if I don't love it, I'll pack up shop and chalk it up to experience." Now I hit the ground running with plans for year 2. It's going to grow so much more, and so am I. I can't imagine giving up on Inner Calling now.

26.  Advice for new business owners:

New business owners, take those opportunities for help people are offering you! Barter your products and services! Making connections is how you stay alive and successful. We are not in this alone. "It takes a village. . ."

27.  Favorite recipe:

My favorite recipe is for snicker-doodles, I learned how to make them in my high school foods class and they are my favorite thing to make in the winter. They make the whole house smell like butter and cinnamon.

28.  Mac or PC?

Mac

@innercallingllc on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter!

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/inner-calling-llc

website: www.innercallingllc.com

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Justork Lifestyle

Please click on the link at the bottom of the page and fill out our short form so that our lenders will reach out to you for available financing options.

Justork lifestyle is a business consultant and financial advisor. We help small businesses from start to finish; from the funding stage all the way to product launch. One of our consultants is with you, every step of the way, to answer all of your questions and drive your business to success. For more information, please visit our website or reach out to us via email at sales@justork.com. We offer a variety of services, including but not limited to:

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