#i ate two oranges then drank a sparkling water

[thatoneandlonelyemo2005]

oranges suck

[letsloveimagines]

Title: Forever

Pairing: Corpse Husband x female!reader

Requested by: Anonymous

Request: How about one where Corpse proposes? With flowers and everything! Like he went out of his comfort zone to propose to you in public because he felt like you deserved it!

Word Count: 2225

Warnings: luff and some swearing

Note: The images doesn’t belong to me, all the credits go to the respective creators. I only made the collage. Also, I will not make anything to make Corpse uncomfortable, if he ends saying he doesn’t like fanfiction about him, I will delete this.

                                                           ♦⋅☆⋅♦

The little black box, with that important thing hidden inside, weighed in the pocket of his dark jeans as he headed for her condo. Corpse's breathing was fast, his hands were shaking immensely, and his heart was beating fast, so fast that it seemed to want to escape his chest.

He strode, always faster than anyone, avoiding people who came in the opposite direction as far away as possible. The further away the better.

Swallowing hard feeling a lump in his throat, Corpse looked at the sky, which at that moment was a sea of red, orange and yellow, indicating that it would not be long before dark and for the moon to replace the sun.

Grabbing his phone and watching the time, he quickened his pace even more, playing with the rings on his long fingers and feeling his back cold with the nervous sweat.

He was ready, however, and he was sure that Y/N was the one. Since that day they met at the small cafe, he knew she was his forever. That day Corpse had risked going out for the first time in a very long time, trying to win even though he knew he would never really be able, at least not as he almost did now with her. That red-haired employee looked at him bored - certainly tired and dissatisfied with his own life, but who wasn’t? - his deep voice stuttering nervously as he tried to place the order. He succeeded there, and the minutes that it took the employee to complete it were truly terrifying. He said a small thank you, handed over the money, and in the moment he took the cup his hands were shaking so much that he thought he was going to drop it. Everyone was looking at him, Corpse was able to feel their gaze and there was nothing he wanted to do but disappear from there. But then an angel came up to him, gently touched his hands assuring him that everything was fine, and offering him a big, beautiful smile that made him dreamy for the rest of the day. Cliché he had the notion of that, but so incredibly good that remembering it makes him feel butterflies in his belly.

The memory was long enough to reach its destination, and the nerves tripled at the moment he saw the condominium of white and brown buildings. He was quick to send a message to let her know that he was already there, and it didn't take long to receive one in exchange of her saying she was going down as fast as she could.

Corpse took a deep breath, leaning against the wall with the white paint a little chipped and in need of a new coat of paint, and reached into his pocket feeling the velvet box stroking his fingerprints. It was still there, safe and heavy with all hopes for a bright future.

"Hey, love." Y/N’s sweet voice sounded nearby, along with the sound of her elegant footsteps.

"Hey, babe.." Corpse greeted pulling the mask away slightly - he couldn't get out without it, even on that very important day - and kissed his girlfriend's black-colored lips (she started to like seeing herself in black since they were together). It was a gentle kiss but full of longing and security, and especially full love. Her lips tasted like blackberries, which he loved, and the black lipstick helped to highlight the beautiful features of her face that only left him even more enchanted. How he was lucky enough to have someone so wonderful in his shitty life? This was something that Corpse questioned every day…

Y/N's eyes were bright when they pulled away and she smiled sweetly. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine. I missed you."

"As did I, baby. Where do you want to go?"

"I thought it would be good for us to take a little walk."

"Are you sure? We can stay home if you want to, or if you don’t feel comfortable." Oh, how he loved her. Y/N was so understanding and attentive, and if she was another girl, she would have left his sorry ass a long time ago. And yes, Corpse was uncomfortable being on the outside, in plain sight, but it was something he wanted to do for her.

"I'm sure, let's go. It will be dark soon."

Y/N was quick to get to his left side, interlacing their fingers when they joined hands, Corpse's bigger hand practically swallowing hers.

Without further ado they began to walk calmly, Corpse remembering to slow down knowing that it would be difficult for his girlfriend to keep up with his hurried pace.

"I was thinking that we could go to dinner at that restaurant that you like." He informed her. It was a small and quiet restaurant, and they had been there before. It had gone well and without any problem. That was how he wanted it that night.

"Sure, I'd love it as long as it's okay with you." Y/N looked at him again with an uncertain look.

Corpse stroked her small hand. "I'll be fine as long as I'm with you."

The pink tone on her cheeks and the passionate smile with which she presented him made it all worthwhile.

On the way to the restaurant they talked about their days. Y/N told him how it had been a little busy day (she was a graphic designer) and she had already finished the cover of a fantasy book, and given it to the writer when he decided he wanted to change something at the last minute. She managed to do so, but not without feeling that she would tear her hair out in frustration. Corpse pulled her closer to him and assured her that everything was fine, that she was great at what she did and that better days would come.

He was telling her about the two-hour stream playing with the friends he had made, and the music he was writing, when they finally arrived.

They went in, asked for a table further away and without much trouble went to sit in their seats, with the menu on the wooden table waiting for them. There was no need to look though, whenever they went there they asked for the same thing, so that's what they did. She ordered spaghetti bolognese and for him just a vegetable soup with chicken. To accompany, they ordered a small bottle of wine. Corpse's left leg swung quickly, while discreetly touching his pocket.

"Is everything alright, baby?" She asked at the same time that the food was being served.

"Yes, don't worry."

Y/N didn’t stop looking at him with concern, but she did not insist. While they ate they were talking about nothing and everything, enjoying the feeling of being in public in what had been a long time. The restaurant was almost empty, with just another couple at a distant table with their backs to them, which made him more comfortable. It was small with the floor, tables and chairs all in wood, with brick walls with a rustic effect, and small iron lamps lighting the place almost lovingly.

Time passed and Corpse's nervousness only grew. They ate and drank wine, enjoyed dessert, and were happy and smiling.

Corpse was helping Y/N to put on the black leather jacket - her outfit consisted of comfortable shoes, red pants and a cute black tank top, as well as the delicate shamrock necklace he had given her on their one year anniversary -, when she questioned him curiously. "We are going home now?

"Let's go out for a little while." The beautiful girl's surprised look did not escape him, even he was surprised that he was succeeding to do that.

They left the restaurant after paying and ventured into the city, holding hands and full of soft words. Every now and then, Y/N would lift his hand to her lips and give a small kiss on the skin full of protruding veins.

The stars shone in the middle of the night, the moon was full and round, high and illuminating the path to the park. There were wooden benches every few meters, tall street lamps peeking out near the trees and the round lake by the children's swing. Y/N used to go there in her childhood.

They sat on the grass by the lake, their feet immersed in the cold water that reflected the moon. They were silent for a moment, completely at peace watching the couple of swans swimming nearby, gently cutting the water and with their long white necks almost intertwined.

It was now. Now was the moment.

"Y / N…"

"Yes, Corpse?" She looked at him with the stars shining in her eyes, and leaving him speechless.

Corpse’s heart sped up, blood pounded in his ears and his hands trembled when he opened his coat and removed the flower he had protected in the inner pocket. The black rose was in perfect condition, sparkling with the small silver particles that embellished the petals.

He handed it over to Y/N, who accepted her happily with a smile almost as big as his love for her.

"Oh, babe, it's beautiful! Thank you so much."

He smiled shyly, with extremely sweaty palms, and watched as the girl in front of him admired the flower, without knowing that she was also being admired by him.

"I do not deserve you." He said at last, immediately regretting it seeing her smile fading.

"What are you saying?"

"I-"

"Babe, you’re really scaring me right now. What's going on?" Y/N's gentle hands came to his face, taking off his mask (which was fine by him because he trusted her absurdly, and they were alone), and caressed the skin of his cheeks with concern.

"Let me talk before I turn myself into a coward once again. I don't deserve you, I have a full sense of that, you're too good for me and kinder than anyone will ever be. I'm not a religious person, my life didn't allow me to be , but since we’re together I pray every day that you would not wake up one day, and realize that it’s not me who you want by your side."

"It will never happen, you are everything I ever wanted." She whispered.

"I am not... but you are what I always desired." He smiled. "You take my problems when you shouldn't, you help me and you take care of me. I can talk to you about everything because I know my secrets with you are safe. You support me when I doubt myself, and you do it all without asking for anything in return. "

"I just want your love."

Corpse kissed her, feeling the soft brush of her lips against his. Just a simple kiss from her was enough to calm him down for good. "You already have it." He assured her, then touched the velvet box and took it out of his pocket. Y/N's shocked sigh filled the air, and she raised her hands to her mouth. "And I know that I will never be enough, that I will never be good enough... But I will try. From sunrise to bedtime I swear to love you and try to make you happy every day. And if one day I don't, I know that I wasted the best thing I have in my fucking life... "

The tears overflowed from her eyes, sliding down her face in rivers of happiness. "Corpse…"

Corpse opened the box showing her what he had been hiding for several months. It was a simple ring - too simple for her in the boy's opinion, but that was how she liked it - made of silver with an oval diamond in the middle, flanked by two smaller ones in square shape, and many smaller ones around it, embellishing the circle.

"Y/N…" He sighed deeply, more sure than ever in his life, even though trying to control his anxiety. "Do you want to marry me?"

The girl threw herself at him, hugging him tightly and crying in his chest. "Yes, yes! Of course I do! Of course I want to marry you."

He laughed happily and deeply, smiling so much that he thought the corners of his lips must reach his ears. He kissed the top of her head, inhaling her perfume and murmuring how much he loved her... But mainly thanking her for loving him.

After a few minutes of laughter and sobbing, Y / N walked away with red, wet cheeks and slightly swollen eyes, but looking more beautiful than ever.

"How long…?"

"Much too long." Gently he took her hand and stuck the engagement ring on her left ring finger, where it glowed as if it belonged there. "I should have done this a long time ago."

"It's beautiful." Y/N said in admiration. "I love you."

"Not more than I love you."

They shared another kiss, this one longer than the others, and left their foreheads gently touching each other, with their eyes closed and wanting to record the moment forever in their memory.

"Thank you." He whispered.

"I’m the one who should be thanking you…"

"I knew you were forever. I've known it since that day at the cafe."

"Yes…" Y/N agreed. "Forever."

                                                           ♦⋅☆⋅♦ Tag List: @breathygasps @unicornblood4ever @jay-jay-love @mintchip17 

[chalametdarling]

T.C. fluff:  Being Timothée’s co-star in an upcoming romantic drama, and having a long weekend off together to explore the coastal European city you’re filming in

“Wow, this is beautiful.” You hugged your rolled-up towel close to your chest, the view of a crowded beach, sparkling crystal blue water and colourful umbrellas lining the sand awaiting you. 

“Oui, c’est très beau,” Timothee agreed, playfully nudging your shoulder, guiding you to follow him down onto the sand. You slipped off your shoes and the two of you began meandering through the endless sea of warm sand and towels, eventually finding vacant real estate between a young family and a group of women bathing in the sun. It was Timothee’s idea to explore the French town you were filming in together while you had a few days off, and as you laid down your towel, and Timothee retrieved containers of strawberries and savoury biscuits from his backpack, you couldn’t believe you’d thought of spending your Friday any other way. 

You talked and ate and waded into the water, splashing each other and jumping over waves. And when you weren’t doing that, you alternated between reading your script and a novel while Timothee laid on his stomach, headphones on, head resting on his arms.   You couldn’t quite tell behind his sunglasses, but judging by how you’d finished reading an entire chapter and he hadn’t moved a muscle, you assumed he’d fallen asleep. Under the sun block and daylight, his pale skin seemed to glow. His hair a perfectly messy mop, grains of sand nestled into the ends of his curls. Timothee really did have perfect features. You could objectively see that now that you were really looking at him. Bold eyebrows poking over the tops of his sunglasses, strong nose, angelic lips- “You staring at me?” You quickly looked out towards the water, resting your chin onto your knees and hugging your legs. “No, just checking if you were awake.” He rolled over, stretching out. “I am now.” Checking the time on his watch, he added, “Shit. We’ve been here for hours.” He reached out and picked up one of the few remaining uneaten strawberries by its stalk while you packed away your books into your bag. “Do you feel like getting dinner?” he asked, tossing the leafy remains into the pile you’d made as you ate.   “Yes,” you eagerly nodded your head. Laying out on the sand all day really worked up your appetite. Already feeling drowsy from the fresh air and too much sun, you followed Timothee’s lead from the shore to the row of bars and cafes lining the beach. He led you inside the doors of a quaint pub; one hand holding the door open, the other on the small of your back. A live band was set up on the raised stage towards the back, playing acoustic French music for those enjoying meals and post-work drinks. You found a seat at the bar, sharing bread and wine, your heart swelling the more time you spent learning the workings of Timothee’s mind. You could’ve sat all night with your chin in the palm of your hand, listening to him rattle on about his favourite directors and film theories and character studies, then abruptly stop himself with an embarrassed laugh, running his palms down his thighs. “Anyway,” he laughed, shaking his head. He finished his drink, then tuned into the DJ who’d since replaced the initial band. “Wanna dance?” Several drinks in and hours of dancing later, you were still on the dance floor with a drink in hand.  As the night went on, every time your head spin subsided, Timothee was either dragging you through the crammed bodies back over to the bar or replacing empty glasses in your hand with overflowing cups of alcohol. After the fourth glass exchange, you put an arm around his neck to pull his ear down to be level with your lips. While your thoughts were still somewhat coherent, your words were a little slurred. “Timmy, maybe you should slow down a bit.” As you were speaking, the ABBA remix playing faded into Kid Cudi, and you watched as your words fell onto deaf ears. Timothee’s face lit up and he shouted, “FUCK YEAH!” raising his free arm above his head. Your eyes followed his movements as he sang along to every word, big grin on his face, never stopping to breath; only pausing for a sip of his drink.   Before you knew what was happening, your back was against the wall and Timothee’s lips on yours. But just as quickly as he had kissed you, he was pulling back, flicking his hair back and shouting the next lyric through a tipsy grin. As the chorus started for a second time, he caught sight of you watching him, wide eyed and in a daze, and set his empty glass down as you reached to grab his waist. He stepped in to kiss you again; this time harder, longer and deeper.   The remainder of the night became hazier and hazier; only blurred visions of licking salt off the back of your hand and clinking shot glasses, jumping and spinning around the dance floor, and your fingers getting caught in Timothee’s salty curls remained. * An instant ache shot through the middle of your forehead as you blinked your eyes open, and you groaned. Sheer confusion washed over you, your mind unable to piece together where you were or what day it was, until you spotted a familiar black backpack against the wall and a bottle of cologne on the dresser. Ah, Timothee’s place. Timothee’s bed, to be specific. Slowly rolling over and rubbing your eyes to look behind you, you discovered you had the bed to yourself. The other side was practically untouched, blankets still tucked under the mattress. A door creaked open, and Timothee emerged from the adjoining bathroom, dragging his feet behind him. Seeing you were awake, he changed course and climbed onto the intact side of the bed, mumbling out, ‘Morning’ in a deep, soft voice. He sat with his back to you, and the one hand cradled to your chest itched to reach forward and trace down his spine. You weren’t sure where the urge came from. Maybe because of the way his hooded eyes, drunk on tequila and European air, remained locked on yours for hours last night. How his strawberry lips sponged kisses on your cheek and neck as you waited at the bar. How his hands had so delicately clasped around your cheeks when he kissed you for real over and over and over again. It would’ve been so easy to push back the covers, walk your fingers across the mattress; to drag them up and down his back or affectionately twist the ends of his hair. But Timothee was leaning back against his pillows to lie down beside you before you could muster up the courage to do so. With interlaced fingers resting on his bare chest, he looked over to you. “How did we get home last night?” You yawned, nestling further down into the pillows. “We walked, remember?” “Oh, shit.” Timothee nodded, pursing his lips with a hum. “I feel like shit.” “You drank a lot last night,” you said softly. He licked his lips, covering his face with his hands. “Fuck.” He stayed like that for a few moments, rubbing his face, and you wondered if he’d forgotten anything else from the previous night.   “I should probably go back to mine.” He dropped his hands back to his chest, looking over again, voice gentle as he spoke. “You can stay if you want.” “No, I should go and have a shower,” you told him, rolling onto your back and stretching your arms out. Timothee’s fingertips ghosted over your neck with a small smile, and you instinctively moved your head back from under his sudden touch. “What?” He shook his head, bringing his hand back to its resting place on his chest, eyes still lazily drooped as he enquired about your plans for the rest of the evening. You pushed yourself up to sit against the headboard, your hand subconsciously hovering over the spot Timothee’s had just been. “You know we have work on Monday, right? I’d like to read my lines at least once before then.” After pointing out you brought your script out with you the previous say, he added, “You have all of Sunday for that.”   You pursed your lips with a sigh. He rolled over, holding his head up with his hand. “Come on, y/n.” You evidently didn’t need much convincing, because a few hours later, you were meeting Timothee for ice cream. Desserts in hand, you found a small table outside the ice cream parlour, shaded from the orange glow of late afternoon sun by an umbrella. The two of you sat looking out at the streets, sunglasses hiding both of your dark, hungover eyes, observing the strangers passing by. And when you had the chance, you stole glances at the boy sitting across from you. When you met him out the front of the hotel, his formerly dry, sandy hair was now shiny, the ends still a little damp. He smelled fresh when you hugged him, and his jumper was soft on your cheek. He’d complimented your turtle neck top, which reminded you… “By the way,” you said, pulling Timothee’s attention from the open roads to you, “I’m not too happy with you, Timothee.” He frowned, taking another lick of his ice cream. “What the fuck did I do?” You teasingly held his stare. “Oh, I don’t know,” you said, pulling down the high neck of your top to reveal your purple stained skin. A shy smile overtook Timothee’s face and he shrugged, laughing awkwardly. “Oh, yeah. Sorry?” “Funny is it?” you mused, sliding your sunglasses down your nose to look over the frames at him. Timothee licked his melting ice cream, then said, “No, but now that you mention it, y/n, I’m mad at you too.” You slid your glasses all the way off, placing them down on the table. “Really? Why’s that?” Timothee, with a cocky smile, tugged down the chunky collar of his sweater, revealing a light bruise at the very base of his neck. You instinctively lowered your face and hid your eyes behind your free hand. “Oh my god.” Through the cracks between your fingers, you saw him smiling, bringing his cone back up to his mouth. “Forgot about that, did you?”   Dropping your hands with a laugh, you reached forward, using your thumb to push back his collar again and run your thumb over the mark you left on his pale skin. “Sorry,” you mumbled with a little pout. With an exaggerated sigh, looking up to make eye contact with Timothee, you added, “What is wrong with us?” He laughed, putting his hand on your wrist and running his thumb over your skin. “It’s alright. I forgive you.” You shook your head in mock disapproval, but there was a buzzing in your chest as you felt his lingering eyes and warm skin on yours.   You strolled back to the hotel in comfortable silence. Despite being a bundle of nerves, it was nice being with him. He made you think, and he made you feel. A man adorned in a billowing linen shirt sat on the side of the street, guitar in hand, singing a sombre tune. You slowed down along with the few other strangers who had paused to listen to the man’s song, Timothee a few paces behind you, taking his sunglasses off as he slowed. A few moments passed, and Timothee leaned down from his place behind you so that he could speak softly in your ear. “He’s singing about his lover.” Timothee paused to listen to the next line. “He doesn’t want to live without them… he feels empty… and sick… he- he’s waiting for her but… he knows she’s gone for good.” Turning over your shoulder, you pouted up at Timothee, who reciprocated the expression. “That’s so sad.” Timothee nodded. His hair flopped over his cheek, and you noticed his eyes sparkling in the golden cast of evening light. Over his shoulder, a couple held each other, longingly looking into each other’s eyes, tenderly touching each other’s cheeks. As a loaded weight settled on your chest, you looked back up at Timothee. The space between his eyebrows slightly creased and he smiled. “What?” Clicking your tongue against your teeth, and shaking your head, you answered, “Nothing.” You both knew it wasn’t nothing. With a sigh, you snuck your hand between his arm and body, grabbing onto his forearm to lead him away. “Alright, I only agreed to ice cream. Let’s go.” It was quiet when you got to your floor of the hotel, so you tried to be as silent as possible climbing the stairs, so other guests weren’t disturbed. You and Timothee were work colleagues, and friends, and his room was only ten steps further down the hall, and you were almost positive that you’d definitely be seeing him again the next day; but as he lingered by your door as you rummaged in your bag for your key, you couldn’t help but feel a little sad you were saying goodbye. Once you retrieved your key, you looked up at him with a smile. “Alright,” you said softly. “This is where I leave you.” Timothee stood by your door, shoulders slightly hunched, eyes stuck on your face. He wasn’t budging, and you weren’t game enough to break first. His messy curls flopped over his eyes again, and you pushed them back behind his ears. He held onto your wrist, slowly lowering it down to your sides. Relationships with colleagues could get messy. Everybody knew that. What does this mean for us? The words were caught in your throat. You wanted to ask; to say it out loud. But you couldn’t bring yourself to form them. Why couldn’t you just be okay with enjoying the moment? Timothee inched his head closer to yours slowly, almost unsure if it was okay. You kept your eyes lowered. “Timothee,” you whispered. “Yes,” he whispered back, resting his forehead on yours. You slowly shook your head. “I can’t.” “Why?” You didn’t respond right away, eyes still focused towards the ground, and he nudged the side of your nose with his, then pulled back from you. “Hmm?” You sighed, closing your eyes and lifting your face to his. Very slowly, he took the sides of your face into his hands. Static in the air charged your movements as his lips grazed against yours. Somehow, you simultaneously had both a million things to say, yet nothing at all. You settled on hugging him, chin resting over his shoulder. It was nice hugging him; to have him holding you close. “Good night, Timmy,” you muttered, eventually breaking free. “Good night,” he said in reply, hands sliding out from around your waist. With tingling lips, you stood up on your toes for a second to place a gentle kiss on the corner of his mouth once more. You unlocked your door, and while slipping inside your room, you looked over one last time at Timothee smiling. “Good night.”

[dragonfics]

Faithful - Chapter 1

Chapter title: Lucky Thirteen

Summary:  It is the law that a monster cannot take a lover who is not their Soulmate. Doing so is an unspeakable crime against the will of the Fates. Those who commit this crime are marked Unfaithful—the greatest shame a monster can endure.

Truth be told, Rus had never been a monster of great faith.

Ships: Spicyhoney, (a couple more in future chapters)

Tags: (Dystopian) Soulmate AU, Discrimination, Sex work, Fell/Tale-verse dynamics, Work Inappropriate, LV issues, Illegal relationship/Forbidden love

_______________________________________

Hey guys, first chapter of the Soulmate fic ^_^ It’s NSFW, so watch your step. Hope you enjoy!

Read on AO3

OR

Below the cut

In this city, there was nothing more depressing than a singles bar. Though Rus appreciated the sentiment—Fates knew how lonely sleeping by yourself got—the underlying expectation that one would find their Soulmate at one of the hundred-and-three mixers in the city made the entire endeavour rather pointless.

Security guards were stationed at every door. ‘For the safety of all patrons’ read the signs over their posts. Rus wondered if anyone actually bought that crap. He’d seen what happened to those who were Unfaithful—dragged away by security for trying to go home with a monster who wasn’t their Soulmate. He didn’t know what they did with them, but he’d heard stories about the punishments. The rehabilitation programmes. The banishments.

Well. There was alcohol here. Cheap alcohol, but it wasn’t as if Rus could afford anything more. May as well take advantage of it on his night off. He had no intention of taking anyone home, Soulmate or otherwise.

He would have gone to Grillby’s. It was a little out of his way, but it was far more esteemed than this place, and Grillby was more than willing to slip him a few freebies. But Rus wasn’t exactly in the mood to make small-talk with his brother’s… boyfriend.

So he drank his cheap wine, ate the cashews off the bar, and let the chatter and music fade to white noise around him. Given that it was a Saturday, the place was a little overcrowded. Among the throngs, flickers of colour drew attention to the Soulmate couples, glowing brightly (or faintly, in several cases). In these situations, Rus enjoyed being alone. It let him feel invisible.

Someone tapped his shoulder. Huh. Not invisible enough, apparently. He turned slowly, mind already slightly fogged from the alcohol. “yeah…?”

“Mind if I join ya?”

Rus eyed the monster, letting his gaze wander his body. An attractive monster, from an objective standpoint. Shirt open, sturdy abdominal muscles, well polished scales, silky hair…

“nah, sorry,” Rus said, turning back around. “drinking alone tonight.” He hadn’t come here to flirt, regardless of the impression one gave off sitting alone in a singles bar. He took another sip of his wine—then sighed in frustration when the stranger tapped his shoulder again. Turning, he lifted a brow bone, ensuring his impatience was apparent.

“How ‘bout we compare marks?” The monster flashed him a gleaming smile, holding out his forearm. “Y’never know ‘til ya check, right?”

Rus fought back the urge to roll his eye-lights. “right. look man, this isn’t going to happen, okay?”

The monster’s smile sunk, but he quickly recomposed himself. “Aw, c’mon, sweetheart. Jus’ show me yer soul mark and we can put this ta rest.”

“why?” Rus asked flatly, angling himself away from the monster and taking a long drink of his wine. His head buzzed.

“We could be Soulmates.” The monster winked, but his words made Rus shiver.

“yeah... not interested.”

The monster frowned slowly, looking confused. “But, if we’re Soulmates, then ya gotta…”

“gotta what?” Rus said sharply. The monster looked taken aback. Clearly, he hadn’t been expecting resistance. “tell you what,” Rus said. “i’ll put your mind to rest.” He yanked up his sleeve, displaying the faint crescent brand on his ulna, just a shade darker than his bone.

The monster’s eyes lit up, and he studied Rus’s forearm, then his own, comparing their marks. Both remained dull and unlit, and the monster grimaced, looking disappointed. He studied Rus for a moment, eyes narrowed. Rus sat still. This monster was Fell-verse—he could tell by the aura of magic that surrounded him. Sharp and aware. In Rus’s experience, Fell monsters were less inclined to the Soulmate laws. For a few seconds, Rus feared he might protest.

Then he glanced at the door—where security was eyeing them. Grunting, he gave a flippant wave of his hand. “Yer loss, sweetheart.” He wandered away and Rus slumped with relief.

After finishing the remainder of his drink, he slid off the barstool and nudged his way through the crowds. He brushed past a pair of Soulmates, glowing pink. They smiled at him, arms around each other. They seemed to be smiling at everyone, in fact. Ah, pink. The colour of newfound love. Rus grimaced to himself and squeezed past, heading outside.

The street was busy with Saturday crowds, but at least he could breathe out here. He retrieved a cigarette and lighter from his hoodie pocket, leaning against the cold bricks of the building. Above him, the pink light for the Single Souls bar flickered—beneath it, a notice to report any Unfaithful activity to security. It was custom for all establishments to have one.

Rus was halfway through his second cigarette when his phone buzzed in his back pocket. He grumbled to himself and pulled it out, recognising his handler’s number on the screen. “‘sup, val?” he answered, trying to keep his voice steady. He wasn’t quite at the point of slurring, but he was a renowned lightweight. Never really a good front to present to your boss.

“Hey, Rus. You sober?”

Rus stubbed his cigarette out against the wall. A red-glow Soulmate couple passed him, shooting him disdainful looks. “yep,” he lied, giving the couple a false smile.

“Good. Got a job for you.”

On his night off. Hmph. “it’s saturday,” he reminded her.

“It is,” she said. “And you’re meant to be on call.”

Oh. Right. He sighed, nodding to himself. “yeah okay. what is it? the usual?”

“Higher LV than usual.” Huh. That was surprising. They didn’t typically give him the high LV ones. Delicate goods and all. “We’re short staffed,” Val said in response to his silence. “I know. Not your usual assignment. You good for it?”

“yeah, not like i have anything better to do,” Rus said dully. A loud group of monsters passed him, giggling and stumbling and shrieking something about ‘The One!’ Rus narrowed his sockets. “i’ll be there in ten.”

“You’re a gem.”

“i know. i deserve a raise.”

“Hilarious. See you soon, love.”

Rus ‘ported back to his apartment. After drinking a healthy half-litre of water in an attempt to regain his sobriety, he took a quick shower and changed to make himself more presentable. Form-fitting jeans, white blouse, and a dash of cologne.

He found his company-issued bandana among the laundry. White silk embroidered with a silver F. He wrapped it around his ulna, hiding his soul mark. He caught a glimpse of his reflection in the bathroom mirror. His cheekbones were a little flushed from the wine. He supposed he could pass it off as deliberate. (Most of his clients liked to see him blush, anyway).

There was a soft mew at his feet, and he felt a small head rubbing up against his ankles. “kitty…” He crouched to scratch the small cat’s chin. “you know you don’t live here, right?” He sighed. “i should really stop feeding you.” She purred, and he scowled when thin black hairs stuck to his fingers. “you’d better be gone by the time i get back!” She mewed again as he tucked his phone into his back pocket and teleported to the facility.

After being tagged and physically assessed, he was sent to his handler’s office. She glanced up from her desk when he entered, pushing her glasses up her orange beak. Her black eyes sparkled. “Looking sweet as always, darling.” Rus tipped his head in acknowledgement and sat across from her. She slid him a file and he glanced at the monster’s profile.

His soul skipped a beat. “thirteen lv?” He swallowed, stunned. He was one of the few Tale-verse monsters in this field. And for that reason, he was seldom given monsters with LV higher than five or six—if that. “i…”

“He’s safe,” Val said. “We checked him out. Law enforcement. On suppressants. Trust me, darling, we wouldn’t be handing him one of our most valuable assets if he wasn’t.” She pulled a sheet out of the file in Rus’s hands, tapping the monetary value at the top of the page. “It’s not going to be a problem, is it?”

Rus eyed the amount the monster was paying, and swallowed. Fates. He’d be lying if he said he couldn’t use the money. “uh... nope. all good.”

Val smiled, her feathers flattening. “That’s what I like to hear.” She returned to her paperwork while he packed up the file into his inventory, standing. “Got your tag?” she asked without looking at him.

Rus crouched and tapped his ankle. “yup.”

“Good. We can’t have you running off.”

“yeah, because i’m very prone to that.”

“Well, you wouldn’t be the first,” Val said. “Had another one try it with their client last week. It was a mess—and the paperwork!” She looked at Rus and sighed. “I’m sorry, love, I know you wouldn’t. But we have to keep you all tagged. Council regulations and all that.”

“i know,” Rus said. “am i good to go?”

“I don’t suppose you’ll let us drive you?” Val said, looking at him wearily as he stood up.

Rus laughed and waved at her over his shoulder. “not a bloody chance.”

 Rus didn’t drive. Not for lack of trying—his brother had attempted to teach him. ‘Attempted’ being the key word. Perhaps it was the knowledge that he was hurtling down the roads at speeds ten times greater than he could manage on his own two feet, accompanied by hundreds of other objects hurtling at similar speeds (or faster). Perhaps.

Either way, he always caught the train to his clients’ chosen locations. The tag around his ankle suppressed his teleportation, much to his bereavement. The company offered to drive him, of course, but Rus always refused. His policy about not travelling in a fast, small box held regardless of who was behind the wheel. Trains didn’t crash, public though they were.

To his disgruntlement, his carriage was rather abundantly populated by Soulmates tonight. Mostly glowing pink. A few reds about. The pinks were sicklier (in Rus’s personal, honest, and unbiased opinion). Flaunting their Soulmate-ness through very extravagant displays of affection. The reds were more reserved, but no less unappealing to look at.

Above the heads of a pink couple in front of him, a large advertisement blared the words ‘Unfaithfuls. YOU can stop them. YOU can prevent the defilement of our society. Report non-Soulmate activity.’ Rus tried not to look at it too hard. Not that it had any bearing on him. Though his career might be considered ‘non-Soulmate activity’, it was permitted under the law. Nonetheless, any discussions of Unfaithfuls had always made him… uncomfortable.

The walk from the train station to his client’s house was only ten minutes. Ten quiet minutes. The neighbourhood was sparse, only a few apartments dotted between empty plots of land and small shops closed for the weekend. When he reached his client’s modest home, he found it barred by a gate and fence. He double-checked the address he’d saved on his phone. This didn’t exactly look like the home of a monster one would want to intrude upon. He rang the buzzer, and waited stiffly, wrapping his arms around himself.

A voice came through the intercom almost immediately. “Yes?” Low, rich and gravelly.

“um.” Rus swallowed. He didn’t normally get nervous around clients. 13 LV. “it’s… rus. your. your escort?”

Silence. Rus shivered. Then— “Of course. I’ll be right out.”

The front door opened and he glanced up, swallowing. Though it was dark, he immediately recognised the silhouette of another skeleton monster. They were a rare breed, though he wasn’t the first Rus had met outside of family. Sharp features, well-dressed, a little stiff in the shoulders. The monster approached him with a placid expression on his face. His eye-lights glowed red.

Well. Rus knew an attractive monster when he saw one, and he was seeing one. He smiled, though it must have looked faint. Attractive or not, the skeleton still had an unsettling air about him that was common with Fell-verse monsters—particularly those with LV. “hello,” Rus said. The skeleton watched him, but didn’t open the gate. His expression was unreadable. “um... edge, right?”

“You’re Tale-verse.”

Rus blinked. “yes?”

The skeleton frowned, then seemed to realise himself. He shook his head, straightening the creases from his sweater. “Forgive me. You don’t see many Tale-verse monsters in this profession. At least, not in my experience.”

“oh.” Rus wondered if this monster was aware that Tale monsters were very unlikely to be loaned to those with LV as high as thirteen. “well. we are a rare breed, i suppose.”

The skeleton lifted a brow bone. “Indeed.” Rus glanced at his shoes, scuffing them on the ground. “I’m sorry if this is forward,” the other skeleton said, opening the gate and letting Rus inside, “but perhaps we could… skip the formalities. I’m…” Rus caught him swallowing. Then he noticed a tick in his hands. He was fidgeting, unsettled.

This certainly wasn’t the first time Rus had encountered a monster struggling to withhold the uncomfortable urges brought forth by their LV. Fates knew how a monster with LV this high was even coping. But this was familiar territory for him. He knew how to handle this. Relaxing his magic, he smiled amicably, and took the skeleton’s arm. “of course. why don’t you show me to your bedroom… edge, was it?”

“Yes. Yes, sorry, I should have mentioned that before.” He remained rigid under Rus’s hold.

“it’s alright,” Rus said smoothly. He stroked Edge’s arm delicately as they walked across the front yard, soothing. “i’m here to take care of you, but you’re the one in control.” Some of the tension left Edge’s shoulders, and he nodded without looking at Rus.

“Thank you,” he said. Still a little stiff, but it was progress.

Rus wasn’t quite sure what he’d expected, but there was a significant lack of taxidermy and creepy oil paintings inside the house. The walls were painted a calming beige, and shelves of books and figurines lined the room. There was an earthy smell—like pine and wood.  It was certainly neater than Rus’s apartment. There was an unfittingly homely feel to it, too.

Edge led him through the living room and into a corridor. Art hung on the walls, as did small potted plants. Fates, it was like a show-house. There wasn’t a speck of dust in sight. They passed what Rus assumed to be a study—though ‘miniature library’ may have been more accurate.

The bedroom was significantly plainer than the rest of the house. Simple. Practical. Bed and dresser—not even a mirror. Edge stopped to close the door behind them, then watched Rus with his hands folded behind his back. Patient—though, not really. Rus could tell it was a facade. The air itched with magic in need of tempering. “shall we close the curtains?” Rus asked.

Edge nodded quickly and crossed the room, drawing the curtains over the windows. It was something Rus had picked up in his early days working this job. He’d only had the police called on himself and a client once—owing to the absence of a Soulmate glow between them. Once had been enough.

Edge’s movements were unsteady; there was a tick of desperation to the way he held himself. Fates, he was worse than Rus had thought. He walked towards him slowly, touching his arm. “shall we?” he asked. Edge nodded, jaw clenched.

Channelling his magic into calming projections, Rus reached for the hem of Edge’s sweater. But Edge caught his hand. Instead, he began to unbutton Rus’s shirt hastily, making quick work of it. He pulled it off Rus’s shoulders, leaving his top half bare. A visible tremble ran through him as he studied Rus. His eye-lights glanced over the silk concealing Rus’s soul mark, but he paid it little further heed. Instead, he focused on Rus’s face, running his palm over his jaw.

Rus inhaled sharply when he leaned in and pressed their teeth together. Rougher than he’d been anticipating, and it took him a moment to catch his breath. He kissed Edge back tentatively, running his tongue over his teeth. Edge cupped the back of his skull and looped an arm around his hips, pulling their bodies together and delving into Rus’s mouth. Rus hummed in surprise, but reciprocated by running his fingers down Edge’s spine.

When Edge pulled back, his cheekbones were flushed red. He kicked off his shoes and caught Rus in his arms again, lowering him to the bed. The rest of his clothes remained on. Rus let himself go lax in Edge’s arms, allowing him to control the kiss. He could feel the press of Edge’s magic through his slacks—hard. “what would you like from me?” he murmured, stroking Edge’s hip and finding the bone coarse beneath his fingers. “want me to make something pretty for you to fuck?”

Edge gave nothing beyond a stiff nod before kissing Rus again. As he pressed their hips together, Rus let his magic settle into a cunt. Edge cupped his pelvic bone. He grunted softly as he squeezed, licking Rus’s jaw, nibbling on his neck. Rus sighed and tipped his head back. A quiet moan escaped him when Edge’s fingers found a sensitive spot through his jeans. Fuck. He was normally good at remaining composed when with clients.

He decided to switch things around, and reached for Edge’s belt. He loosened it with practiced ease, and tugged his pants down his femurs. He hummed at the sight of Edge’s cock, already hard and leaking. Licking his teeth, Rus eyed Edge, letting a smirk play across his mouth.

Edge caught his wrists and Rus froze, for a second fearing the worst. “Lie back,” Edge said quietly. He wasn’t looking Rus in the eye. His gaze wandered over Rus’s naked form. He stroked his ribs and ilia, studying them, almost curiously. “Turn over.” His voice was low.

Rus lay on his front and braced himself on his elbows. For a few seconds, Edge was motionless behind him. Rus could hear his heavy breathing, and feel the waves of urgency rolling off him. He glanced over his shoulder at Edge. He was kneeling, a blank expression on his face. His body was trembling. Rus swallowed, worried. “hey, don’t worry about me,” he said gently. “i can handle it. just take what you need, okay?”

Edge’s eyes honed in on his face. There was an intensity to his gaze that made Rus shrivel. He turned back around, and waited. Behind him, the sheets shifted. Then—

“oh…” Rus moaned at the press of something soft and warm against his folds. He had to bite on his fist to hold back his vocality. Edge’s tongue slipped inside him and he groaned, pressing his face into the pillow. Oh. Fates. He couldn’t recall the last time someone had done this to him—let alone well.

Magic rushed downward, making his cunt throb. Edge pressed a finger inside him, pushing his tongue against Rus’s clit. Rus was panting, his face flushed. “fuck,” he gasped, when Edge pressed a second finger into him. “oh fuck that’s good.” Edge hummed softly, burying his tongue inside Rus one final time before he withdrew. Rus let his head drop forward onto the pillow, quite flustered.

He glanced over his shoulder then twisted around, reaching for Edge’s heavy cock. “here, let me—”

Edge caught his wrist. His grip wasn’t tight, but Rus could sense the effort he was exerting through the tremors that travelled through him. He shook his head and pushed Rus back down. “I—I’m sorry. I just. I really need to fuck you.”

Rus swallowed heavily, but nodded in reassurance. “of course. whatever you need.” He propped himself up and Edge wrapped an arm around his chest, dragging their bodies together.

“Red if you need me to stop.” There was something dark in Edge’s voice, and Rus bit his tongue, nodding. Edge’s arm around his chest was tight, and Rus could feel him trembling.

“go ahead.” His voice emerged small. Beside him, Edge’s fingers dug into the mattress. The tips were sharp, Rus noticed. He could feel them against his ribs now. Not hard enough to hurt. Not yet, anyway. He braced himself for pain.

When he felt the head of Edge’s cock pushing into him, he sucked in a sharp breath. Edge stopped at once, but his voice was raspy when he spoke. “Am I hurting you?” The way he shook above Rus spoke of how well he was holding himself together.

“no, love, you’re good. keep going.”

Slowly, Edge pushed deeper, grunting. Rus shut his eyes, breathing slowly as his cunt adjusted to the stretch. Edge moved carefully, though Rus was certain it was more for his sake than his own. He slid out of Rus then pushed back in, groaning. “Y-you feel good,” he said tremulously.

“yeah?” Rus stroked Edge’s hand around his chest. “you want to go harder?”

“Yes,” Edge breathed, pushing a little deeper, thrusting a little faster. “Please.”

“go on. you’re doing so well.” Rus gasped when Edge found a rougher pace, squeezing their bodies together. “fuck, that feels good. oh, fates, that’s amazing…” Rus panted, whining softly when Edge latched onto his neck, teeth digging in to the bone. He pressed Rus into the bed and pounded into him, groaning. “oh!” Rus cried out. “oh, holy fuck.”

Edge growled and buried himself into Rus, slowing his pace and holding himself deep. He rolled his hips and found a delicious spot inside Rus’s walls, making him whine. “…oh fates, you’re going to make me come.”

In Rus’s profession, ‘faking it’ was an intrinsic part of the practice. In this case however, it was entirely unnecessary. Every sound out of his mouth was completely genuine—he wasn’t sure he’d have been able to stop them if he’d tried.

Edge seemed a little beyond words himself. The growls and moans he was making were leaning towards carnal, and Rus could feel the thick, heavy magic of his LV in the air around them. He made his best effort to accelerate his soothing projections, but his magic was more interested in arousing than calming. Regardless, Edge seemed to be enjoying himself.

“oh—oh!” Rus screamed when Edge’s fingers found his clit. He stroked it slowly as he ground into Rus, his cock pressing just the right place against Rus’s walls.

Instinctively, Rus held a hand over his mouth as his climax built. “No,” Edge growled, yanking his hand away. “Let me fucking hear you. Let me hear you come.”

Rus cried out, a shudder rushing through him as he came. Edge moaned and held their bodies together, going still inside Rus. A flood of warmth filled his cunt and he groaned, clinging to the bed sheets. Sweat trickled down his skull. His entire body felt hot. He slumped beneath Edge, catching his breath.

Slowly, carefully, Edge rolled off him and lay back on the mattress beside him. “Thank you,” he said, wiping sweat from his forehead. “You can’t imagine how much I needed that.”

Rus only nodded, breathless. Then, to his surprise, Edge leaned over and caught his mouth in a kiss, significantly gentler than before. He drew away and lay back down, shutting his eyes. The tension had left him; Rus could see it. And feel it. The aura he projected—while retaining the natural hint of Fell-verse hostility—no longer sparked with unchanneled magic and aggression.

At this point, most of Rus’s clients would likely have asked him to leave—or have requested another round. But Edge made no move to do either. Or to do anything, in fact, beyond lying at his side, dozing. Rus wondered if he ought to be the one to suggest ending their session. “i, um—i can leave now, if…” He swallowed when Edge glanced at him. He really was the perfect balance of scary and sexy.

“Stay here,” he said. He got up and buckled his pants, then left Rus alone in the room. Rus sat up and propped himself against the headboard. He eyed the clock on Edge’s dresser. Edge still had him for half an hour. Most clients preferred to make use of the full hour—but thus far, Edge had hardly filled the expectations Rus had of ‘most clients’. He was… odd. Though Rus was still deciding whether that was a good or bad thing.

Edge returned with a basin and washcloth, along with a bottle of water. He handed the water to Rus, instructing him to drink. Rus obeyed… hesitantly. He frowned at Edge as he wet the cloth in the basin. “uh, mind explaining what you’re doing?”

“You don’t mind if I clean you up, do you?” Edge asked, hesitating.

“i—i mean. you don’t? have to…?”

“Do you want me to?” Edge asked again.

Rus looked at him, trying to gauge the expression on his face. He found nothing of concern. Shrugging, he popped the cap off his bottle, taking a sip of water. “sure. go ahead.”

Edge leaned in and wiped the magic away from his pelvis. Rus took a heavy swallow of water. This felt… oddly intimate. Which—was part of the job, he supposed, but this was a different sort of intimacy. He watched as Edge dabbed carefully at the tender regions of his pelvis with the cloth. Rus had to suppress a shiver. He wasn’t used to this type of intimacy.

When he’d finished, Edge patted Rus dry with a towel. “I’ll call you a taxi,” he said, folding the towel and cloth neatly.

Rus blinked, surprised. “oh. you still have me for another thirty minutes, though.”

“That’s quite alright. I’ll still pay in full.”

“no, i mean…” Rus shook his head. “you don’t need any more…?”

“You’ve been more than helpful. Thank you, Rus.”

Rus watched him dubiously. Edge picked his clothes off the floor and handed them to him. Rus slid off the bed and slowly got dressed, tugging his jeans over the tag around his ankle. He could feel Edge’s gaze on him.

“Let me call a taxi,” he said again.

Rus waved his hand, standing and heading for the door. “nah, it’s no bother. i’ll get the train.”

“You catch the train?” Edge sounded surprised.

“yep.”

“... Alone?”

“alone.” Rus smiled at Edge from the doorway, tilting his head.

“No, of course, I just—” Edge stood with his hands folded behind his back, shoulders taut. “Allow me to walk you to the station.”

Rus grinned. “aw, you don’t have to do that, man.”

“I insist.”

“i appreciate it, but i’m perfectly capable of walking ten minutes by myself.”

Edge looked at the floor, frowning, then said, “I still have you for half an hour, don’t I?”

A surprised laugh escaped Rus. “well—i suppose i can’t stop you then.”

“Thank you.” Edge sounded strangely relieved.

They walked in silence. The street didn’t stir, empty as it had been on Rus’s journey here. Edge secured the gate behind them before escorting Rus down the road. He walked by Rus’s side without a word. There was an alertness to the way he moved. He was light on his feet, shoulders drawn, hands behind his back. Like military. Val had mentioned he was law enforcement, hadn’t she? Rus wondered if that had anything to do with it. Somehow, he doubted it. There was something… very Fell-verse about Edge’s demeanour. More so than he was used to.

When they reached the station, Edge stopped outside the gates. Rus glanced at him, smirking. “you’re not going to insist on catching the train with me, are you?”

Edge narrowed his sockets. “No. Our time is up.” On cue, the tag around Rus’s ankle buzzed. Edge held out his hand stiffly. “It was good meeting you, Rus.”

Rus lifted a brow bone, grinning as he shook Edge’s hand. “yeah, it was… you’re great in bed.” Edge lifted a brow bone.

“Yes, I know. And I can extend the compliment.”

Rus snorted. “goodnight, edge.”

“Goodnight. Travel safely.”

“i will,” Rus said. He glanced over his shoulder as he entered the station. Edge still stood at the gates, watching him. A little weird, perhaps, but in a strange way, Rus took comfort in it.

[mskagome123]

The Raven Part 2

My morning was slow, even the taxi ride over to Loki's apartment. I was still tired but I had a job to do. Most of the ride was spent with me in a whirlwind of confusion from last night.

The sun cast shadows over the tall building as I paid and climbed out of the car. The building was tall and made of brick. I used the key at the front door and it opened to older walls painted a brownish yellow and stairs. I looked around for an elevator but there were none to be found. With a huff, I started up the stairs.

After making my way around the fairly large building on the third floor, I noticed that there were eight apartments on each floor, meaning I would have to go up one more flight of stairs.

“Hopefully, I get used to this,” I mumbled, already ready to go home.

“Are you new here?”

I turned around to the voice behind me and nearly jumped out of my skin. A man had his head out of a doorway. His hair was short and a dark brown, kind of shaggy. His eyes matched and looked at me with a smile.

“Ah. No. Sorry if I disturbed you. I’m a cleaner for number twenty-seven.”

He huffed, but not in a way that would make it sound like he was angry at me. More like I was in for something.

“That guy is strange. Be careful up there. If you need any help, don’t hesitate to ask.”

“I know him,” No, you don’t, “But thanks anyway.”

“Not a problem.”

Then he disappeared back in the doorway, the door closing behind him. I turned back to my mission and climbed the last flight of stairs. The floor was like any other and so I made my way around, looking for his apartment. When I made it, I noticed the seven had no top screw, causing the seven to fall upside down.

“That’s reassuring,” I mumbled again as I slipped the key into the door.

The place wasn’t particularly messy when I stepped inside. There was a lot of boxes around, making me think he just moved in recently. I sat my bag on the floor and looked around. Despite the hall, the apartment looked newly renovated and the furniture made it look modern. I trailed the apartment slowly, trying to make a list of what needed to be done.

The kitchen was the big mess, with dishes in the sink and others all over the place. There were piles of trash in the corner and, in noticing the electricity wasn’t working, I ran to the fridge. Inside was a lot of the food I had seen last night, although rather moldy.

I closed the fridge before I could puke up my breakfast.

“He’s a pig!”

It took me time and a lot of willpower to clean the kitchen. After I opened the fridge, I couldn’t get the smell out of my nose. So it was the first thing I cleaned. I threw the food away, which filled another bag, and cleaned it out until it was sparkling. After, I took the four bags of garbage in my hands and slowly made my way to the front door. It was antagonizing and left me with my arms wanting to fall off but I grabbed the keys and made it even more slowly out of the apartment building.

It was a long time before I made it down the four flights of stairs and even longer to find the trash bins. I thanked the heavens it was winter and the cold was cooling the sweat that covered my body.

I was thankful until I slipped. My shoe caught a patch of ice and my body came crashing down and my head smacked against the concrete. Immediately, I felt sick and I left the garbages next to the bin, not having the strength to carry them up. My head ached and I clutched on the wall to get back inside.

Get to the third floor. Get to the third floor.

I climbed the stairs slowly and a sound of ringing came to my ears. On the third floor, I knocked on the door the man was at before.

“Woah. Hey. Are you alright? You look pale.”

I shook my head. “I fell and hit my head.”

“Oh shit. Come in. Come in.”

He helped me to the couch and the smell of something baking hit me in the face.

“I’ll get my first aid kit, okay? Don’t fall asleep.” I nodded as I tried to focus my eyes on something.

I need to tell Loki.

Would he care?

The man returned with a box and I looked at him.

“I’m going to check to see if you are bleeding or not, okay?”

I nodded and sat forward so he could look at my head. There was pain and I winced as he probed at it.

“You are bleeding a bit. Won’t need any stitches, thankfully.”

“Are you a doctor or something?”

I heard him chuckle. “A nurse actually.”

“Good thing I remembered where you lived then, huh?”

“Yes actually. You can sit up now.”

I did as he said and he held two pills and a glass of water. “Some painkillers. They aren’t strong but they should last you until you can get home. Drink that whole glass too. ”

“I have to go do my job. There's a lot to do.”

“Text your boss and tell him you can’t finish today because you have a concussion and you need to rest.”

I laughed. “It’s my first day on the job. That sounds like a terrible idea, nurse guy. What is your name, by the way?”

“James. And if you refuse then I’m going to have to go with you.”

“Okay.”

“Fine. We will go when you are ready.”

I nodded and after a moment, I began to stand up. I fought both nausea and dizziness as I made my way over to the door. My body felt heavy and I felt James’ arms as they touched my arm and my back. My vision changed, blurring the door ahead of me.

“I can’t. I want to throw up.”

He helped me to the bathroom and I gave him my phone at his request.

“What’s he under,” he asked as I bent down at the toilet.

“Loki,” I said before my breakfast came up.

“Is this Loki,” I heard James say, “Hi. This is James from downstairs at apartment seventeen. I am aware that this is Stephanie’s phone. She is unable to clean today due to her slipping and hitting her head. Yes. I am a nurse and she is in good hands. Oh?”

There was a knock at the door and I pulled away from the toilet in time to hear James open it.

“Mr. Loki, sir? She’s in the bathroom.”

“I’m going to take her home.”

I felt a soft tug as someone pulled me into their arms.

“My purse has my keys in it,” I said softly, “It's in your apartment.”

“You know we have no need for that,” not to me, he added, “What does she need to do at home?”

“She needs to sleep and relax but she needs to be monitored, in case she has any troubles. And keep her hydrated.”

“Thank you.”

Loki held me close as he exited James’ apartment.

“Feel better, Stephanie. Let me know when you do.”

“I will. Thank you.” I smiled down at him and Loki turned away to walk down the stairs.

“Close your eyes. This will be worse than last time.”

I closed them and the shift twisted wrongly in my stomach. I was thankful when my feet hit the ground in the kitchen since I was able to dry heave into the sink. Almost nothing came up since I had already barfed my breakfast just a few moments ago.

Loki stood awkwardly beside me, his hand on my back.

“Get a cup from behind you please,” I said, turning on the faucet.

He did, handing me a tall glass. I thanked him and filled it with water from the tap. I drank the full glass before stepping away.

“Let lay you down.”

“I know what James said but you don’t have to stay. I’m fine on my own.”

We went to the couch and he sat at the end. “And if you didn’t wake up and vomited and died, you’d expect me to live with that?”

“People die,” I said morbidly, sitting at the other end of the couch, “It wouldn’t be your fault.”

He pulled on my arm until I moved closer to him, laying my head on his lap. “God’s don’t die so I’d have to live with something like that my whole existence,” he said, laying a blanket from the back of the couch over me, “And I’m not prepared to live with your death on my conscious.”

He can’t be fretting over me.

“Or any other humans?”

“No. Just yours. Now go to sleep.”

What he said confused me. Does he care or not?

I fell asleep with that thought on my brain.

“You aren't meant to be alive. Did you know that? Your dad forced me to have you. You weren't supposed to be here. I was going to be famous.”

“She doesn't eat.”

“I dare you to give her something to eat.”

“Why is she still alive?”

I jerked up suddenly. Loki's lap was replaced with a pillow and the sun had fallen for the night. At the sight of movement, I jerked my head toward the kitchen. Loki was focusing on something before but was looking at me now, worried.

“You're sweating. Are you alright?”

I thought for a moment before nodding. It was just a dream. Those people weren't here.

“I'm making some dinner. Would you like some?”

“Did you go to the store or something? I don't have any toward

I need to go to the store.

I stood slowly, making sure to keep myself from getting dizzy. I was feeling loads better from earlier.

“No. I just found some cans in the cupboard.”

I walked over to the empty cans and fought the urge to laugh. “You do realize Chef Boyardee Spaghetti O's, black beans and chicken and rice soup doesn't go together in a pot, right?”

“No?”

He motioned towards the large pot on the stove, which had a strange orange color to it.

“Okay. This looks like a disaster. We can just order food. Please get out of my kitchen.”

He lifted the knife he was using to cut the last of the celery. “But it's almost done.”

“Put the knife down. Please.”

He did as I asked and moved from the kitchen. I cleaned up, trashing the makeshift soup that wasn't even heating on the stove, and only ate a few bites of the celery before putting it into a bowl and tossing it in the fridge.

He was looking at my books, which kept him preoccupied him as I ordered a pizza.

“Have you ever had pizza,” I asked him as I hang up.

“Yes. It was edible.”

“Good. We have one on the way. Now I ask, no more cooking unless you follow a recipe and learn to turn in the stove.”

He only nodded, despite looking to argue. “Actually I can't stay. I have a date.”

I gave him a look of confusion.

A date? I guess that clears feelings up.

“A date? Then please be on the way.”

“Is something wrong?”

I had turned away from him but I turned back. “No. Nothing is wrong.”

I could feel his eyes move around as I did, following me. I grabbed the phone and called back the pizza place to cancel it.

I had mostly conquered my eating disorder but I still struggled.

“Why are you canceling? You need to eat.”

“I have celery. I was buying it to spare you of eating your own cooking.”

He frowned. “Celery is not enough for you. You need to eat something more.”

“You need to get ready for your date, God of mischief.”

I sat at the end of my couch and curled around a pillow.

“I will see you tomorrow then, at the apartment.”

Fuck. My purse.

“I need my purse. Would you be able to-”

As if a blink of an eye, he disappeared and reappeared, bag in hand.

“Thanks,” I said slowly, grabbing my purse and setting it next to me.

“You're welcome, Stephanie.”

He bent down to kiss my head but I moved.

“Don't.”

He looked visibly hurt and I almost regretted not taking the kiss. “As you wish.”

He disappeared again and something in me broke. Tears fell from my eyes and I felt like melting away. I turned more into the pillow.

I don't care.

But I did. And it hurt. He's so nonchalant.

“It's pointless,” I say to myself, forcing it out as I cried, “he was only helping a jobless woman out.”

That was it wasn't it. I was one of those girls that though a man liked them when they were just being nice.

With that realization, my crying slowed and the dark thoughts lingered.

Of course, he isn't interested. Who would be? You should just disappear. You weren't meant to be born.

I forced myself up then. If I stayed on the couch, my night would get progressively worse. I needed to do something. So I went to the kitchen, grabbed my last full bottle of wine, and made my way to the corner of the living room, where I had an empty art easel and several empty canvases. I picked a few colors from the shelf and placed them on the plate of already dried paint.

I took a few drinks of wine and lifted my paint brush. The wine settled uncomfortably in my empty stomach but I sat the feeling aside and began painting.

It was half a bottle of wine later that I realized what I was painting. It was a Raven in a state of grey. Under one of its talons was a black handkerchief with a green and gold l.

I stepped back when I was done. It was beautiful. Prettier than my other works. Carefully, I took it from the easel and sat it on the kitchen counter to dry.

The wine didn't last much longer after that and I called back the pizza place to order. Getting drunk made me hungry and I knew it was a good idea to eat.

When the door had rung, I stood up to get it and the dizziness ensued.

But I felt fine.

“I'll be right there,” I said as I slowly made my way to the door.

It was moving, it seemed, laughing at my inability to travel from the couch to it. My vision blurred too, almost not seeing it at all.

“No. No.”

I felt sick and as the man at the door was pounding on it, I fell to the floor and began throwing up the wine I had previously drank on the floor. The door was broken down, I think but I had collapsed by them, seeing only a shadowy figure.

There was beeping, something steady and calm. My body was encased in something soft and warm. I didn't want to move. A knock came to a door and I heard it open.

“Has she woken yet,” a familiar woman voice asked to someone in the room.

“No. The doctor says it's from the alcohol she drank. She wasn't fully recovered from a concussion.”

That was Loki's voice. He sounded so strange. I'd say worried if I didn't know any better.

“Were you with her before?”

I didn't hear an answer.

“And you left her? No wonder she drank.” There was a pause before Pepper swore. “Did she eat at all?”

“Last night, she had barely eaten and I'm not sure about this morning. She was throwing up when I saw her first today and I hadn't seen her eat before I left her.”

Pepper's steps echoed the room. She was nearing me.

“If you are around her, you have to help her eat. When we were younger, she was hospitalized from refusing to eat. Something her mother instilled in her.”

Loki was silent.

I slowly opened my eyes and immediately watched the relief wash over Pepper's face. She sat beside me, wiping a tear away from her cheek.

“Hey. How are you feeling?”

“I feel like I got hit in the head with a bat,” I grumbled back, my throat raw and dry.

Dramatic.

“You took a nasty blow yesterday and the lack of food in your system only made it worse. Plus the alcohol. What were you thinking?”

“Like I had a shitty day and wanted to drink and paint.”

“Stephanie…”

“I'm fine, Pepper. I'll be fine just like all the other times.”

“This is worse than any other time. You could've died from bleeding in the brain or alcohol poisoning or starving yourself,” Pepper stopped to sigh, standing, “I'm going to go get the doctor okay? And your breakfast should be up soon. Loki will make sure you eat.”

He had been silent, just leaning on the wall beside the bed. Pepper kissed my forehead and left the room, leaving us alone. We fell into an uncomfortable silence.

“Why do you do that to yourself?”

So it speaks. I looked at him, my face only showing a tired expression.

“Do what?”

“Why do you stop eating?”

I sighed. “There was a period in my life where I would look in the mirror and see what others thought of me. 'She's too ugly’, ‘Shes so fat” or in my mother's case, ‘You were never meant to be on this Earth and you should just willow away’. So eventually I did.”

“You know they are wrong, don't you?”

“That doesn't make it any easier to deal with. Those thoughts are still there, instilled in my brain. Pepper thinks it was all my mother's doing but everybody whispers things like that around me.”

I showed him my arms, which were scarred from years of self-harm. He slowly drew closer, sitting by me to take my arms in his hands. His thumbs ran across them slightly and I could feel the warmth on the raised flesh. After a moment, he ran his thumb along a straight line that fell parallel to my arm.

“This one is different,” he whispered.

He wasn't showing much emotion, simply observing. If we weren't talking about one of the darkest times of my life, I would have smiled.

“That was the scar that nearly cost me my life. Pepper found me in our dorm. My mother had just visited, only to give me the last of my things. I loved her, despite her hatred of me. That was the last time I saw her.”

He drew his hands close to mine and covered my hands with his. His eyes looked up to my face.

“You aren't a waste. You are beautiful and you always were. No one can take that away from you.”

I nearly choked hiding back the tears. Besides Pepper, no one had said anything like that to me. And it was somehow easier to believe from him.

“You didn't know me before,” was all I could muster as tears fell down my face.

“I know you now and that's all that matters.”

Without thinking, I pulled him into a hug and he sat stunned for a moment before closing his arms around me. I cried into his chest, causing my headache to worsen. He combed his hand through my hair softly and I only clutched onto him tighter.

He thinks every girl is beautiful. It's not like he gives more than a damn about you.

Stop it. Just stop it. This is enough. To know he cares is enough.

I pulled away from him slowly, mumbling a sorry for ruining his black shirt, which he was still wearing from the last time I saw him. I gave him a look.

“Who found me?”

“I did. I was checking on you but when I found you, you were on the verge of passing out.”

I grumbled, laying back in the bed. He saw me passed out in a literal bed of wine. That's nice.

He hadn't let go of my hand, I noticed, even as a knock came to the door and a kind woman brought a tray of food in. She spoke something about a 'soup of the day’ and made her way back out.

Great. It's soup.

I lifted the cover for the food and it was, in fact, soup. Chicken soup by the look of it. There was also a too-small portion of apple juice and a strawberry sugar-free Jello. I sighed and picked up the spoon. Before I dipped it in, I noticed Loki staring at me.

“You don't have to watch me when I eat. Pepper just meant by 'help’, it's more like a 'check after I eat to make sure I did’ sort of thing. ”

“You heard that?”

“Yes. From when she came in at least.”

“Can I ask you something, then?”

I took a sip of the broth and nodded.

“Why was she not surprised you drank after me telling her I left you alone.”

I stopped. I didn't expect that question and I wasn't sure how to answer. “It's not important.”

He had dropped my hand a moment ago and was now running it through his hair. He stood and began to pace to the wall my bed faced and back, his hands in a prayer-like position in front of his lips. I stayed quiet, just watching his movements.

“You were passed out covered in regurgitated wine when I found you. Did I force you to drink? Because if this was my fault I want to know.”

I stayed silent. I felt pathetic now for how I reacted then but I couldn't take it back and I certainly didn't want him to know.

“WAS IT ME?”

My fork had lifted then and flew across the room to stick in the wall. I jumped and the look on my face make him look down in almost horror at himself.

“Yes. But no,” I said, hiding my shaking hands under the blankets, “It was just a way I reacted to something that you did. Because I thought something else was happening when it wasn't and so when nothing did, I became disappointed in myself. So it wasn't you. It was just my image… of you.”

“What do you mean?”

I looked out the window beside my bed and tried to focus on the small dotted pattern from the shades in front of it. “ I thought that you cared about me in a romantic way and when you went on a date, that image in my head broke and I reacted badly. It wasn't your doing but my own,” I looked back at him, “Please don't blame yourself.”

He was looking at me, his brows furrowed as if he was completely oblivious to what I was talking about.

“I don't know how to act with you,” was all he said as he moved back over to me and sat on the chair close to me.

I didn't look at him and took another drink of the soup in front of me. “Act however you want to act with me, Loki.”

“I. Can't.”

All at once, he disappeared, the fork fell and a knock came to my door. I looked up from my soup and tears welled in my eyes. Wiping them away, I was greeted with Pepper once again and another familiar face.

James.

[bffhreprise]

Best Friend For Hire Reprise, Entry 369

 Getting paid to play a video game was such a strange idea.  I still didn’t understand James’ angle in having us do this, but even playing with the character creation was getting me excited.  The possible hair styles alone seemed endless, starting with a basic look and following deeper and deeper advanced options to refine the style however I wanted.  I noticed that Babette was modeling her character after herself, but I didn’t want to be playing myself.  I wanted…

 I thought for a while, uncertain.  Then I came across a slider for creating and adjusting a widow’s peak.  I grinned to myself, wanting to create a form that screamed “vampired” to any who saw it.  He needed to be handsome, gaunt, and stern with black hair and pale skin.  His eyes… charming?  Piercing?  Hmm…

 Babette finished creating her character, Cogneur, before I was done with Ombre, but both of us easily beat Heloise.  She made small adjustments, stared for a while, and adjusted some more, acting as if we had all day.  With Dani impatiently making her character pace nearby, I doubted we had long at all.  If she complained to her dad…

 “Louise Labé?” questioned James as he came up behind Heloise.

 “A poet I like.” she replied, shrinking into her chair in embarrassment.

 “You didn’t!?” laughed Babette, shaking her head in disbelief.

 “Oh, let her be.” I ordered, knowing what my sister would say next.  “You never complained when she used to read to us.”

 “We were six!  I didn’t know poets were lame yet.” insisted Babette with a predatory grin.

 “Lame?” questioned Dani from where she sat.

 “I believe she means boring.” stated James disapprovingly.

 “Is not!” exclaimed Dani fervently.  “I love poetry!  I know hundreds!”

 “Not in any language they’d understand.” replied James as he stepped up behind her to pat her head.

 I nearly argued that he should try us, since we weren’t mere rabble that could barely handle one language, but James would know.  I suppressed a shudder as I remembered that James knew far too much, things that should have been impossible to discover.

 He turned to face Babette, saying, “Brandon might be the only one who agrees with you about poetry in this house.  Dejon might force you to read poetry for the rest of us if he’s in the mood.”

 Babette stared, the gears of thought were probably racing in her head.  “How?” she asked.  “He doesn’t seem that tough.”

 “Dejon doesn’t need to be tough.  If he tells you to do something, you’ll find yourself doing it.” James informed us.  “You really need to stop underestimating the rest of us.”

 Even as my sister nodded, I failed to suppress a snort.  That sounded like absolute rubbish.  No spell could… well… none that I knew…  I frowned, forcing myself to acknowledge that I didn’t really have a clue what was possible.  From what I “knew” before, no one could keep up with a Slayer, but James wasn’t normal.

 “Daddy, we should do a poetry reading!  Heloise and I could consult with Mila about which ones and musical background!” suggested Dani excitedly.

 “If you decide on a time, I promise to attend.” he replied, turning back to face her seat.

 She turned and grinned.  Then she started animatedly talking with Mila in some bizarre, practically musical language while still making her character pace.

 “What’s she saying?” questioned Heloise.

 “Just making plans.” replied James, his attention back on Heloise’s character progress.

 “What language is that?” asked Babette as she strained for more height without leaving her seat, wanting to watch Dani.

 “Nothing you need to learn.  Remember, the three of you are on a job.  You need to stay busy.” he admonished.

 “Sorry.” stated Babette, twisting back around to play the starter quests.

 I quickly joined her, not wanting his ire.  There was something strange about James when he was angry, something that made all three of us exceptionally uncomfortable.  Under our old boss, we had been yelled at plenty of times, even when we didn’t deserve it, but that terrible man couldn’t make us feel so… guilty.  A certain amount of fear toward James was natural, I was certain, but I didn’t really understand how James made us feel so terrible about our mistakes with so few words.

 Babbette and I had barely finished a quest when James left, despite Heloise barely joining us.  Dani didn’t seem to care what we were doing, too involved in her conversation.  At least, I thought she was too involved when her character showed up next to us.  I stared, watching in shock as her character grabbed mine, bending him down and biting into his neck.  Blood sprayed out as her teeth sunk into him, but the initial spray was brief, very brief compared with the long time they stood with her teeth at his neck.  When his body stopped shaking, she unceremoniously dropped him.  More blood sprayed as she took a dagger to her palm.  Then she bent down, forcing her hand over his mouth, and his body convulsed.

 Ombre was still convulsing when Dani’s Luxa turned her eyes on her next victim.  This time Dani started telling us at great length how difficult choosing the right animation was for her.  She had watched numerous vampires feed and adjusted some of the default animations to be similar to her favorites.  Hearing someone declare a favorite way for a vampire to feed just felt wrong.  Still, I didn’t really think Dani was nuts until she started telling us about our part in her plan to conquer the world.

,,,^._.^,,,

 Staring around, I was fairly certain that I wasn’t supposed to be here.  I didn’t recognize any of the buildings, the people, or even the sky here.  I could imagine how the big, fluffy cloud would look if I was in my neighborhood, and I was certain that it would be far more peaceful there.  Why wasn’t I home?

 “Hello, Noelle.  Sorry for the wait, but you ended up quite far from the house.” came a voice from behind me.

 I didn’t recognize the voice, but the woman knew my name.  When I turned, I was amazed at how beautiful she was.  She had flawless skin, and I didn’t see any trace of makeup, though her lips were redder than normal.  Her eyes were a vivid green, seeming to sparkle in the light.  Her hair flowed in the small breeze, and only as I followed its length did I notice that she was a maid.  There was a maid who knew my name!

 “This way, Noelle.  I needed to park a block away, since I took one of the company limos to fetch you.” she told me, motioning for me to follow her.

 I did, admiring how she seemed to float along without a care about the people staring at her.  Did I count as staring at her?  Who was she?  Did I know her?  I kept following her, remembering that was my task.  “Wow.  A limo!” I exclaimed excitedly.  “Do you think there’s a movie star nearby?” I asked, knowing that they sometimes came to the city.  “Maybe a singer!”

 To my surprise, the maid opened the door, curtsying as she motioned for me to enter.  Was I meeting someone important?  No one was inside when I stepped into the limo.  The seat was soft and wrapped around a low table.  There was fruit and water.

 “Oh!  Hello!”  I exclaimed when I turned, drawn to the sound of a shutting door.  A maid was sitting next to me, smiling.  “Wow.  I’m dressed up.  Sorry, but I’m a bit forgetful.  What are we doing?”

 “Hello, Noelle.  I am Mila.  You took the wrong bus by accident, so Mr. Somerset allowed me to fetch you, though he hasn’t been informed yet.  You have a job interview with him today.” she replied with such a kind smile.

 “I have a job interview!?” I asked excitedly.  When she nodded, I said, “That’s amazing!  Jamie will be so happy.  She worries about me.”  Realizing that I wasn’t certain where we were going, I cautiously asked “Are we friends?”  I liked this woman, but even I should know the names of my friends.  I didn’t remember Mila.

 “I am quite certain we will be, but we have just met.  Would you like some refreshments?” she asked, motioning to a small table with fruit and water.  “If you would prefer something else, there are crackers available, some cheese, and a few types of rolls currently stocked.  I typically take better preparations, but I really did believe you were going to step onto the right bus and hurried to get here when you didn’t.”

 “I’m so sorry!  I’m usually okay at busses.  Where was I supposed to be going?” I asked, sad that I made this nice lady go out of her way.  “Oh, no.  Sorry.  I forgot your name.  I have trouble remembering things.  Would you mind telling me?”

 Thankfully, she wasn’t angry, still smiling politely.  When she told me her name, I repeated it to myself aloud and then in my head, over and over, taking a slice of apple from a plate she held up to me.  Then I drank some water.  Oranges!  I love oranges.  I ate an orange slice as I listened to Mila tell me that I was on my way to be interviewed.  I had a job interview!  That was nice.

 “Where are we?” I asked, taking in the beautiful fountain and sculpted bushes along the drive.  There was a huge building here with a fanciful facade.  “So pretty…”

 “Yes, the master is quite fond of his estate.  You are here at Somerset Estate to meet James Michael Somerset III, so you can have a job interview with him.” explained Mila with such a kind smile.

 We walked through two sets of double doors, and I stared around at the lofty, painted ceiling as well as the twin staircases rising to a second floor.  Even the walls were decorated here, engraved wood with lovely paintings.

 When I started turning up to look at the ceiling again, my eyes caught a boy, a very handsome boy with blue eyes and chestnut hair.  “Wow.  When did you get there?” I asked in surprise.  He was very tall.

 Smiling down at me, he asked “Noelle, why are you here?”

 “This kind lady found me and brought me here.  She said I was supposed to… er... “

 “Have an interview.” stated Mila.

 “Really!?” I asked in surprise.  “I should’ve dressed up!” I looked down, surprised to find myself wearing my favorite green dress.  “Oh.  I did!”  Grinning, I looked up to the boy and asked “Isn’t this great!?”

 “Marvelous.  Let’s get you upstairs for the paperwork.  Your sister will be thrilled to hear you’ve found a job.” stated the boy, still smiling.

 “I have a job!?  That’s wonderful!  I knew I needed to come here.” I acknowledged, following behind him.  Then I realized I had forgotten something.  “Wait.  You have a name.  Did you tell me?”

 He turned around, saying, “James Michael Somerset III.  Welcome to Best Friend For Hire.”

 I repeated his name several times and kept repeating it in my head.  “I got it.” I assured him, happy as his smile widened a little more.

 I was introduced to someone in a kitchen, but I couldn’t remember his name, too distracted by the taste of the most marvelous cookies.  There were more beautiful hallways, paintings, vases, and sooo many stairs.  Then there was a fancy room that looked like a peaceful forest where Mila told me about legal stuff.  Sometime later, I was being taken home.  Mila informed me that I had a job and encouraged me to remember, so I could tell Jamie!  My sister was going to be so happy!

[maryxglz]

LOS ANGELES—“I always wear leather these days,” Tom Hiddleston quipped with a laugh as he strode in, tall and resplendent with long, flowing hair and Loki’s blue and black soft leather costume, complete with a cape.

He was on a break from filming “Thor: Ragnarok” at the Village Roadshow Studios in Oxenford, Gold Coast, Queensland in October last year. Earlier, we watched Tom and Jeff Goldblum (Grandmaster) shoot a scene in a colorful set.

“This is not my own hair, no,” he clarified with a grin. In contrast, Chris Hemsworth (Thor) surprised us with a short haircut in his return as Thor. “Chris doesn’t have to come in as early in the morning as I do,” Tom said. Is he jealous? “Chris just gets an hour more sleep than I do, but that’s OK,” he answered.

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The London native sat down for a chat as he ate an orange and drank bottled sparkling water. There’s a playful mood in the studio which Tom credited to director Taika Waititi and costar Jeff Goldblum. The New Zealand filmmaker, noted for his small movies, is a refreshing choice to direct this third installment of the “Thor” franchise.

Tom and Chris are joined in the cast by Idris Elba, Cate Blanchett, Benedict Cumberbatch, Tessa Thompson, Mark Ruffalo and Anthony Hopkins.

Excerpts from our conversation:

Since we are on the set, what has been this day like for you, so far? Do you thrive in a grueling shooting schedule? I love what I do. I’m lucky to call this a job. In the scheme of things, a day’s work as an actor can’t be called grueling. I do get up very early, but that’s just the nature of how things are run because with Taika on this particular film, we like to shoot between 7:30 a.m. and 5 p.m.

I have to be ready to shoot at 7:30 a.m. so I’ve got to get all of this (hair and makeup) on before then. I get up to train because that’s the only time I have. So I get up at about 3 a.m. but I go to bed early.

At what time? Oh, it depends. If I’m shooting regularly, it’s easy to put myself to bed at around 8 p.m.

How long does the hair and makeup take? It takes a while because I don’t look like this underneath. There are little intricacies. I’m supported by the most incredible team that has done my hair, makeup and costume for some time. They take pride in their precision, and I depend on them. It takes about two and half or three hours. We’ve all seen films where a misplaced wig will take you out of the film.

How do hair, costume and makeup help you? The costume is always helpful. They’re big, structured, heavy costumes with capes, shoulder blades and body armor. It makes you stand in a different way—you stand up straight so you carry yourself differently than when you’re wearing jeans and a T-shirt. All of it is helpful. There’s something about these gloves—they feel like fighting gloves. It’s like armor. Loki is so protected.

The hair and makeup is helpful, too. It helps put me right back into place. The costumes are so brilliantly designed in this film because the designers have to replicate two-dimensional comic-book art, which is very colorful and often practically impossible. And yet, they manage to do it.

I’m not just standing in the costume, but fighting and running in it, doing tumbles and somersaults. They’ve found a way to make the costumes practical, so you can wear them for 10 hours, and they become a part of the performance.

In the scene that we watched on the set, we saw that Loki was delighted his brother was going to be in the gladiator match. Then, it was announced that it’s the Hulk he’s going to compete against. Loki goes, “Oh, sh*t.”

Loki hasn’t seen the Hulk since he lost “Infinity War One” in the first “Avengers” film, so the idea for Loki to be in the presence of the Hulk is immediately terrifying. He knows what happened last time

Also, in that scene, there seems to be a little buddy thing going on between Loki and the Grandmaster. Can you talk about that relationship? The fun thing about the Grandmaster and Loki is that they’re both outsiders, mischievous spirits who probably both feel like they never belong. They have big egos and an anarchistic sense of humor. They recognize each other’s traits.

The Grandmaster has fashioned his own kingdom, which is a tyranny, basically. It’s where people dance and play music, but he’s a despot.

How is it working with Jeff? Jeff is absolutely one of the most consummate actors I’ve ever worked with. He’s so prepared and professional and, at the same time, relentlessly playful. He finds new ways to do it every single time, and he’s given so much. Every one’s been on the floor laughing.

He’s only been here for 10 days, but he’s been shooting every day. When I think of his career, there’s nothing he hasn’t done. But he’s still so fresh and energetic. It’s a real pleasure.

Can you talk about how refreshing it must be to have an indie filmmaker like Taika Waititi direct this? Earlier, Taika said the producers weren’t interested in a director who knows how to blow things up. The thing about directors is that they bring their own fingerprint to their films. I’d say that about any director I’ve worked with on this character—Kenneth Branagh, Joss Whedon, Alan Taylor and now, Taika. His particular artistic fingerprint is one of humor and humanity. He’s very funny and smart. He has injected into this film and into the world of Thor this incredible, light heart and sense of fun.

As Loki, I’m the god of mischief. I’ve always had fun, but every single character is having a great time in this. Chris Hemsworth is loving the fact that, now, people are starting to realize how funny he is. Taika and Chris together are a match made in heaven. This movie will have a lot of laughs in it, and that all comes from Taika. He’s fantastic.

Taika’s independent films are miraculous, truly. I saw “Hunt for the Wilderpeople” before I came here. It was shot in 18 days, which is an amazing achievement

Obviously, you don’t want to repeat Loki as the same evil brother who tries to sabotage Thor. You want to add dimension. But now, we have Cate Blanchett playing the ultimate devil. What are the new curves for Loki in this film?

Loki has always been unpredictable. The most fun thing about him this time around is that I don’t have the responsibility to play the villain or antagonist. Cate is the villain, and she does an extraordinary job.

As for Loki, he has this mercurial presence. All Thor films are about family. There’s some sense of this family with enormous power—the father and two sons. The relationship between the two brothers is something that always evolves. It evolves in this one, as well, without giving too much away.

[twh-news]

On the ‘Thor’ set with Tom Hiddleston in Australia

“I always wear leather these days,” Tom Hiddleston quipped with a laugh as he strode in, tall and resplendent with long, flowing hair and Loki’s blue and black soft leather costume, complete with a cape.

He was on a break from filming “Thor: Ragnarok” at the Village Roadshow Studios in Oxenford, Gold Coast, Queensland in October last year. Earlier, we watched Tom and Jeff Goldblum (Grandmaster) shoot a scene in a colorful set.

“This is not my own hair, no,” he clarified with a grin. In contrast, Chris Hemsworth (Thor) surprised us with a short haircut in his return as Thor. “Chris doesn’t have to come in as early in the morning as I do,” Tom said. Is he jealous? “Chris just gets an hour more sleep than I do, but that’s OK,” he answered.

The London native sat down for a chat as he ate an orange and drank bottled sparkling water. There’s a playful mood in the studio which Tom credited to director Taika Waititi and costar Jeff Goldblum. The New Zealand filmmaker, noted for his small movies, is a refreshing choice to direct this third installment of the “Thor” franchise.

Excerpts from our conversation:

Since we are on the set, what has been this day like for you, so far? Do you thrive in a grueling shooting schedule? I love what I do. I’m lucky to call this a job. In the scheme of things, a day’s work as an actor can’t be called grueling. I do get up very early, but that’s just the nature of how things are run because with Taika on this particular film, we like to shoot between 7:30 a.m. and 5 p.m.

I have to be ready to shoot at 7:30 a.m. so I’ve got to get all of this (hair and makeup) on before then. I get up to train because that’s the only time I have. So I get up at about 3 a.m. but I go to bed early.

At what time? Oh, it depends. If I’m shooting regularly, it’s easy to put myself to bed at around 8 p.m.

How long does the hair and makeup take? It takes a while because I don’t look like this underneath. There are little intricacies. I’m supported by the most incredible team that has done my hair, makeup and costume for some time. They take pride in their precision, and I depend on them. It takes about two and half or three hours. We’ve all seen films where a misplaced wig will take you out of the film.

How do hair, costume and makeup help you? The costume is always helpful. They’re big, structured, heavy costumes with capes, shoulder blades and body armor. It makes you stand in a different way—you stand up straight so you carry yourself differently than when you’re wearing jeans and a T-shirt. All of it is helpful. There’s something about these gloves—they feel like fighting gloves. It’s like armor. Loki is so protected.

The hair and makeup is helpful, too. It helps put me right back into place. The costumes are so brilliantly designed in this film because the designers have to replicate two-dimensional comic-book art, which is very colorful and often practically impossible. And yet, they manage to do it.

I’m not just standing in the costume, but fighting and running in it, doing tumbles and somersaults. They’ve found a way to make the costumes practical, so you can wear them for 10 hours, and they become a part of the performance.

In the scene that we watched on the set, we saw that Loki was delighted his brother was going to be in the gladiator match. Then, it was announced that it’s the Hulk he’s going to compete against. Loki goes, “Oh, sh*t.”

Loki hasn’t seen the Hulk since he lost “Infinity War One” in the first “Avengers” film, so the idea for Loki to be in the presence of the Hulk is immediately terrifying. He knows what happened last time.

Also, in that scene, there seems to be a little buddy thing going on between Loki and the Grandmaster. Can you talk about that relationship? The fun thing about the Grandmaster and Loki is that they’re both outsiders, mischievous spirits who probably both feel like they never belong. They have big egos and an anarchistic sense of humor. They recognize each other’s traits.

The Grandmaster has fashioned his own kingdom, which is a tyranny, basically. It’s where people dance and play music, but he’s a despot.

How is it working with Jeff? Jeff is absolutely one of the most consummate actors I’ve ever worked with. He’s so prepared and professional and, at the same time, relentlessly playful. He finds new ways to do it every single time, and he’s given so much. Every one’s been on the floor laughing.

He’s only been here for 10 days, but he’s been shooting every day. When I think of his career, there’s nothing he hasn’t done. But he’s still so fresh and energetic. It’s a real pleasure.

Can you talk about how refreshing it must be to have an indie filmmaker like Taika Waititi direct this? Earlier, Taika said the producers weren’t interested in a director who knows how to blow things up. The thing about directors is that they bring their own fingerprint to their films. I’d say that about any director I’ve worked with on this character—Kenneth Branagh, Joss Whedon, Alan Taylor and now, Taika. His particular artistic fingerprint is one of humor and humanity. He’s very funny and smart. He has injected into this film and into the world of Thor this incredible, light heart and sense of fun.

As Loki, I’m the god of mischief. I’ve always had fun, but every single character is having a great time in this. Chris Hemsworth is loving the fact that, now, people are starting to realize how funny he is. Taika and Chris together are a match made in heaven. This movie will have a lot of laughs in it, and that all comes from Taika. He’s fantastic.

Taika’s independent films are miraculous, truly. I saw “Hunt for the Wilderpeople” before I came here. It was shot in 18 days, which is an amazing achievement.

Obviously, you don’t want to repeat Loki as the same evil brother who tries to sabotage Thor. You want to add dimension. But now, we have Cate Blanchett playing the ultimate devil. What are the new curves for Loki in this film?

Loki has always been unpredictable. The most fun thing about him this time around is that I don’t have the responsibility to play the villain or antagonist. Cate is the villain, and she does an extraordinary job.

As for Loki, he has this mercurial presence. All Thor films are about family. There’s some sense of this family with enormous power—the father and two sons. The relationship between the two brothers is something that always evolves. It evolves in this one, as well, without giving too much away.

[foodtheywrote]

food+drink from IT’S NOT ALL DOWNHILL FROM HERE by Terry McMillan

(these are all Kindle highlights. please let me know in the comments if you have other mentions of food and/ or drink in this book.)

1. buffet of fried chicken, BBQ ribs, baked beans, au gratin potatoes, some kind of salad, collard greens, and cornbread.

2. chocolate cake

3. angel hair pasta with prawns, some garlic bread, and a good salad

4. We could have some raspberry sorbet and not too many glasses of wine so that we still have energy...

5. glass of water with a slice of cucumber resting between tiny ice cubes.

6. ...a large plate of figs, squares of dark and white chocolate, green grapes, and four or five different types of cheese. Beige crackers are spread out like cards on a blackjack table.

7. ...all kinds of casseroles and bowls of fried chicken and a honey-baked ham and macaroni and cheese on the table, and all four burners had pots with steam bursting out of the tops of them. I saw squares of yellow cornbread and collard greens and sweet potatoes in chafing dishes.

8. ...two glass pitchers of lemonade and iced tea.

9. We both laughed, and I remember throwing a piece of French bread at him and missing. B. B. King—who still was very quick at the time—grabbed it in his mouth and took off. Carl was lucky I didn’t grab a handful of my delicious spaghetti and meatballs, or he’d have been covered in it!

10. ...candied yam.

11. ... fried chicken and collard greens. Lucky also had macaroni and cheese, which I passed on.

12. She then bit off a big piece of honey cornbread. “Neither one of us should even be in here,” I said as I looked down at my plate. The chicken was fried. I could see the ham in the collard greens. The candied yams had brown sugar and butter oozing out of them. And then there was my beautiful cornbread. Did I really need to eat all this?

13. ...double cheeseburger, some soft fries, a diet Coke, and three farewell Twizzlers.

14. “I made lasagna and a salad and as you can see, French bread and steamed asparagus.”

15. When I went to put my registration back inside the glove compartment, staring at me was a brand-new package of Twizzlers.

16. “I’ll have the pizza with ground beef, but with no beans, no sour cream, and no avocado.” “Anything else?” “I would like to try the fried ice cream.” “To drink?” “I’ll have a virgin margarita.” “What kind, sir?” “A normal one.” I winked at her, so she knew I wanted my regular: combination chicken tacos and chicken enchiladas with sour cream. All the combos come with beans and rice and I almost always end up taking something home. I ate guacamole and chips and Kwame drank what was really just lemonade...

17.  I grabbed the tasteless granola, some raspberries, and low-fat milk...

18.  ...string beans and that stuff with the scrambled eggs in it again?”

19. ...pot stickers and various types of chow fun

20. ...the white boxes that we knew were pot stickers and brown and white rice, and the fortune cookies, at least ten of them.

21. But I ordered a low-fat mocha latte with no sugar instead.

22.  I just made a strong pot of Peet’s Sumatra and I baked a delicious apple pie for Joe.

23.  I could hardly eat the stroganoff, which was terrible, and also because I had snuck a hamburger (not cheeseburger) with small fries before I came over...

24. “I got lasagna and sourdough bread, and a Caesar salad and asparagus for you...

25. Kwame lifted the wide lasagna noodles and let them fall back on top of the red meat sauce. Then he pulled on the cheese to form a string...

26. ...from about eight different salads, we chose four and a bowl of chunky homemade vegetable soup.

27.  ...red miso short ribs, Thai chicken meatballs, and shredded jerk chicken floating in thick golden sauce...

28. We had to order the seasoned rice and bread. At checkout, we decided to get the salad and soup to go and bought two of those little round macaroon cookies that come from France. I ordered watermelon mint lemonade...

29. ....finest halibut for you along with baked sweet potatoes and a salad and brown rice.

30. I figured it wouldn’t hurt to have a drumstick and a wing on hand for a late-night snack.

31. ...last two kosher hot dogs and a few French fries and a half hour later, I scraped the vanilla out of the ice cream sandwich and put it on a saucer...

32. ...sweet potato pies, peach cobbler, bread pudding, and apple pies—

33. ...I sliced apples. I opened ten cans of peaches. I boiled sweet potatoes and mashed them with cinnamon, nutmeg, sugar, eggs, vanilla flavor, and a drop of bourbon. I made bread pudding that was so fluffy it almost floated out of the little baking dishes I bought. The peach juice boiled onto the aluminum foil I knew to put under the cobbler because it happens every year.

34. lobster tails with butter and baked potatoes with chives, sour cream, and butter and a salad and sourdough bread

35.  I did not want to go out for cake and ice cream.

36. I was overdue for a cheeseburger and fries. I had been good. I could count how many I’d had since I got back from Las Vegas, which was almost two months ago: five. I could also count how many times I went to Carol’s and had their French toast with bacon: three.

37. ...once she had it, she would have to pretend fried chicken and candied yams and honey cornbread would kill her.

38. “Yes, I would like to have a double cheeseburger with a purple onion and a small order of fries.” “What kind of cheese would you like on that burger?” the voice said. “Cheddar. Oh, and can you also put pickles on it?” “You got it. Any of our delicious desserts strike your eye? Our apple pie is killer and our ice cream sundaes are made with the best chocolate syrup. And there’s a new flavor of ice cream to choose: strawberry cheesecake.”

39. ...two thick pieces of French toast with butter, drenched with maple syrup, two strips of bacon, a glass of orange juice, and a cup of coffee. With two packets of Splenda.

40. We’re having marinated rib-eyes, steamed brown rice, no bread, a salad with oil and vinegar, and sparkling water for me and Loretha, right, Lo?”

41.  “And for dessert?” Sadie asked suspiciously. “Fruit salad. Take it or leave it.”

42. ...bought a slice of pepperoni pizza, a salad, a Diet Coke, and a chocolate chip cookie.

43. ...cottage cheese, scrambled eggs, a small piece of chicken breast, and a peach that she was already cutting.

44. I took a long sip of my detoxifying apple-cucumber-celery-spinach-cranberry-pomegranate drink, and then stared at my steel-cut oatmeal with no raisins and definitely no brown sugar.

45. ...that Hawaiian French toast with the rum-battered Kona-coffee whipped cream and pineapple marmalade

46. I ate an apple. And half of a whole wheat English muffin that I toasted and spread this stuff called ghee that Jonas told me to buy instead of butter. It tasted like butter but better. I wanted a glass of orange juice so bad

47. ...chocolate chip cookie or a juicy cheeseburger with fries and a vanilla shake.

48. ...did not put any sugar in my coffee but I did put in cream. I was starting to get used to it. And instead of eating French toast or pancakes topped with bananas and hot syrup or waffles with hot syrup or eggs and bacon with hash browns and toast with butter and jelly, I had plain yogurt with berries and whole wheat toast.

49. ...salad with a thousand different vegetables and cooked prawns and then chunks of chicken and oil and vinegar dressing. I did eat a breadstick.

50. ...baked chicken. Brown rice. A salad. Steamed vegetables. I passed on the sourdough bread and butter.

51. Jonas has made an amazing tofu stir-fry if you’d like to have dinner with us.” “No thanks.” “It’s also got ginger, carrots, string beans, and garlic, and a little soy sauce. You won’t even know it’s good for you.”

52. ...chipotle grilled pork tenderloin with strawberry-avocado salsa. And this is spicy brown rice. That’s spinach and onion couscous. Those are salmon fishcakes. And the salad is spinach, feta, and goat cheese.

53. ...triangle turkey sandwich...

54. ...eat the savory teriyaki beef I ordered along with a cup of hot water and lemon

55.  purple sweet potato, almond milk, and ginger smoothies

[smartcookie727]

Solid Script: Heat

Hey friends! Here’s a little oneshot for Levy McGarden Day :) I just love her and thought it would be fun to take a look back on her childhood. This one is totally safe for work, (lol) I know that might be a little surprising given my track record. I promise lovefest prompts are in the works so you’ll get some of that later ;) I hope you all enjoy! Please let me know what you think; feedback is immensely appreciated. 

Prompt: Levy McGarden <3

Length: 1.9k

Solid Script: Heat

Levy's heart raced, how many spots would be left? Master only ever chose a maximum of eight mages; it may already be over.

"The seventh participant in this year's S-class promotion trial is Levy McGarden."

A wave of goosebumps coursed down to her fingertips; finally, it was her turn. Makarov listed off the last participant, and the guild hall erupted in cheers, swearing, and laughter. It almost felt like a dream; she would actually be participating in the S-class trial. Levy had watched year after year as amazing wizards—her friends—fought for that elite title. She was now entering a select group within Fairy Tail, the future of the guild. This exam was hers to win and hers to lose.

Levy's mood suddenly dampened, and she followed her teammates to a bench near some of the others. Levy was heedless to the chatter about deciding partners as it filled the air. Jet and Droy's cheers fell on deaf ears. Her mind fixated on that one thought: the trial was hers to lose. Levy let her head settle onto her hands, exhaling soft and low, loosing herself to a time long passed.

Levy stiffened at a tap on her left shoulder, arms tensing reflexively.

"I didn't mean to startle you, child," Makarov apologized, sitting down next to her at the table. Levy looked over at him, previous apprehension gone.

"It's ok, Master, I was just lost in my book. I didn't notice you come over." She placed a thin bookmark down to save her page. Makarov carefully watched Levy's face. She'd been around the guild for a while now, but she'd yet to move on from the past she refused to mention.

"You seem to love those books." It was no secret that Levy was in the library so often she occasionally slept there. He knew her books would be the key to untying the knot in her heart; he just needed to know where to start pulling.

"I do! I love them," she chirped, "Erza brings me a new one every time she comes back from a job outside Magnolia." Levy smiled, admiring the open book on the table in front of her.

Makarov moved in closer to the young girl. "Is that one special?"

Levy nodded vigorously. "This one is the first I was able to buy with the money I got doing odd jobs with Erza." She closed the book, hands running lovingly across the intricate cover.

"But you have many others, don't you?"

Levy's eyes grew bright. "Oh yes! I have a whole bookcase full now in my room." She sighed happily, thinking about all the pages she would explore, just waiting for her to pick them up.

"You know, Levy, you're very passionate about books. Have you ever considered attempting magic with them?"

She looked back down at the book, stinging calmness sweeping over her features. "No, Master."

Levy’s light faded in an instant. Makarov could tell this was a difficult subject for her, but wounds didn’t heal properly if left alone. "Well, this is a wizard guild. You should give it a try.''

"I don't think I have any magic." She hesitated, her disappointment palpable. "Erza has tried to teach me, but I could never do it."

Makarov leaned back from the table, scratching his chin. "You know, child, we do have a fairly new member who may be able to help you."

Levy turned to look at him, the embers of hope still smoldering in her eyes. "Oh, really?"

"Yes, his name is Freed. He uses rune magic." Levy straightened in her seat, interested and nervous all at once. "He may be more suited to the kind of magic you might wield, rather than someone like Erza, who has magic geared towards combat."

"Do you think he could teach me?" Her eyes beginning to sparkle again.

Makarov smiled and pat Levy on the head. "All you have to is ask."

A large crash rocked the guild. Annoyed, Makarov moved towards the noise. "If you two imbeciles are planning on wrecking the guild again, I'll feed you to Mirajane and Erza!" A giant hand came down, crushing the young boys, effectively ending the fight.

A chorus of groans emerged from near the bar as Makarov lifted his hand and returned to his former size. Tufts of pink and black hair could be seen slowly emerging from the crater Makarov had left. Levy shivered and giggled at the absurdly large lumps forming on their heads. Natsu and Gray were always going at it and certainly got what was coming to them, but she did not envy the bruises they'd have tomorrow.

Levy scanned the guildhall, the silence after the fight dissipating into the room's normal clamor. Her eyes came to rest on a youth with long, green hair pulled into a ponytail. He wore a red cloak with a rapier at his waist. The young man sat quietly at a table reading as he ate his lunch; he was somewhat familiar, but Levy did not know his name.

Freed. It had to be him.

She'd been around the guild long enough to know the names and faces of the regulars and had gone through guild records, learning about the mages who did long term jobs. There was nothing about him in any of the books she'd read; he had to be Freed.

Slowly, her book tucked under her arm, Levy approached the youth. She stopped a few steps away, her fingers running over the edge of the cover nervously, unable to bring herself to speak.

"May I help you, madam?"

Levy stared at him, petrified. Her voice croaked an indistinguishable response, and she lost her grip on her book, suddenly slipping out of her fingers. Freed caught the book before Levy could react and gently placed it on the table next to him.

"Is there something you need assistance with?" Noting her reservation, he attempted to alleviate her tension with a smile. "I'm Freed. It's nice to meet you…miss?"

"Levy. My name is Levy McGarden," she stuttered.

"Hello, miss Levy McGarden. Is there something you need of me?" Levy stood eerily still and unresponsive. "I noticed you watching me. Don't be afraid. This book of yours, I've read it. It's one of my favorites."

Levy sat down at the bench next to him and grabbed her book, clutching it to her chest. She looked Freed dead in the eyes. "Master said you use rune magic."

"Yes I do. I write magical runes with my sword. Why do you—"

"I want you to teach me." There was new steel in her words.

Freed chuckled. This girl was an enigma; she was nervous and unresponsive one minute then headstrong with an iron will the next. "It's not that simple. You need to know a wide variety of scripts to use rune magic effectively."

"I do. I read in the guild library all the time. I'm smarter than I look." Levy was half glaring him down and half smiling.

"Good." It would be interesting to see what this girl would do when she grew up. She clearly had the right passion to use magic. All that was left was to find the right one. "There is a book in the guild library, Essential Structures, Composition, and Abilities of Various Forms of Script Magic. It's the one I used when I first learned." He paused, remembering the time fondly. "I brought it with me here. You should find it organized alphabetically in the Teaching Magic section. Why don't you read it and see if there's anything resonates with you? Once you know what kind of script magic you like, I can show you how to write a few basic structures."

"Erza! Did you see that?" Levy squealed, her excitement electric. "I held it for five whole seconds!"

"You're improving vastly, Levy. Why don't you try it again?"

Levy nodded and calmed herself, concentrating on the word. She raised her right hand and drew the letters quickly in front of her. "Solid Script: Heat!" The word glowed soft orange, and heat emanated from where it hung in the air, slightly above her head. Levy walked towards her creation, focusing on its essence, but soon it blew away in the breeze. She began to pant, the toll of using magic settling in.

"That was wonderful! You held it for seven seconds that time, but you should rest." Erza came to sit with Levy, placing a glass of water in front of her. She happily drank and leaned against her friend.

"Can you believe it Erza? I can really use magic." Levy beamed up at her, and Erza smiled back.

"I knew you were strong, Levy, and I always believed you could do it. You just needed to find the right medium. This solid script magic will grow to be powerful. I can tell."

"Yes, indeed it will, miss Levy McGarden."

Levy turned and ran up to the young man resting against the door frame. "Freed! I've decided on the rune magic I like: solid script. It's so versatile! Did you see?"

He ruffled her hair. "Yes, I did. Your structures have improved since the last time we studied. You were quite impressive. One day you may even make it to S-class."

She and Freed would both be in the S-class trial this year. He'd always been so far ahead of her. How could she ever dream to surpass him? He'd practically taught her magic. Levy would be competing in the trial, but realistically there was no chance she'd win. The exam was already lost. Still, she had to try. Giving up was not in Levy's nature. She'd do her best and make the most of the experience she'd gain.

"Levy, have you chosen a partner yet?"

Levy lifted her head, fog clearing from her usually cheery mind.

"What...Erza?" Levy asked. It was hard to focus on Erza's voice over the constant fighting between her teammates, both intent on being her partner.

Erza glanced over at Levy, concern in her eyes. "I asked if you had chosen a partner for the trial yet."

Levy let out a breath she had unconsciously clenched. "Oh. Not yet. I'm not even sure I can do this." Levy bit her lower lip, worry evident on her face.

Heavy black boots and a studded jacket made their way towards Levy from behind. He would not tolerate her thinking she was weak. She was small, but she had a brain bigger than the rest of these idiots’ put together. He'd take this as an opportunity. He was the reason she was broken, but he would build her back up again. The fire and ice assholes, even Juvia had been chosen over him, and he was pissed. Beating those two up would just be a sweet bonus.

He could tell from Levy's hunched shoulders that she was having doubts. He wanted to punch those damn partners of hers for not realizing how anxious she was, and their yelling was grating painfully on his sensitive ears. Although he hated fanning the flames of her insecurities, he was worried about Levy if the trial came down to a test of strength. She was still a shrimp, but he would be her shield.

"Well, if ya wanna win you should pick me as your partner. I'll make you big."

[michellelinkous]

My Remarkable Colon Cleanse Experience: a 7 Day Journal

Global Healing Senior Editor Wendee Nicole decided to do the Complete Body Cleanse Program™ — a comprehensive program to detoxify and improve health that will take three to four months to complete — and it starts with a 6-day Colon Cleanse. Not everything eaten on Wendee’s cleanse experience is approved or endorsed by Dr. Group, but this was her experience trying to follow the recommended diet and protocol as closely as possible.

Wendee’s Story

I have a milestone birthday coming up in July, and I want to get in great shape by then. I’m not getting any younger, and I want to lose some weight — my main goal — but also to get healthier overall, including reducing the risk of health ailments in later years by removing toxins from my body. Every time I do a cleanse, it resets my digestion and I feel better. It also gives me an opportunity to set my health intentions anew and even takes on a spiritual element, for me.

Global Healing’s Colon Cleanse Program™ recommends avoiding soy, gluten, red meat (and all meat), high fructose corn syrup, artificial sweeteners, refined sugar, processed foods, canned foods, alcohol, and excess coffee or caffeine, among other things. Instead, I’ll eat a variety of fruits (this includes avocados and tomatoes, which are fruits!).

Every day during the six-day cleanse, I will take Oxy-Powder® and Latero-Flora™ — a single-strain probiotic (Brevibacillus laterosporus). Latero-Flora is a transient probiotic, which means it does not set up shop in your body like other probiotics do, but passes through. However, on the way, it targets harmful organisms that live in the colon, like yeasts.

I know that prevention is the key! Dr. Group says that health begins in the colon — the large intestine — and that’s because we can accumulate years of gunk in there, including toxins and unhealthy microbes. Colon health is the start of good health!

For complete protocol details, check out our article, How To Perform a Colon Cleanse: The Complete Guide.

Below, I detail the supplements I took, how much water I drank, and all the foods I ate — as well as my overall daily experiences.

Friday — Day 1

Supplements

2 Latero-Flora + 6 Oxy-Powder

Water (with lemon)

80 ounces

Breakfast

1 cup blueberries & raspberries

1 cup ginger-mango tea

Few sips mango kombucha

1 cup watermelon chunks

Lunch

1 avocado with sea salt

1 banana

Cold-pressed mixed vegetable-fruit juice

Snack

½ bag crunchy mango bites

1 cup mint-chamomile herbal tea

Dinner

6 jicama tacos (jicama wraps with cucumber and carrots)

4 oz. homemade guacamole

4 mini tomatoes

1 cup watermelon

Activity

100 crunches + plank

Woke up excited about the cleanse! Dr. Group's standard daily recommendation is drinking half your body weight in water daily, but on a cleanse, more is better. I’m drinking from a 20-ounce reusable bottle so I can track how much I drink.

I decided to drink room temperature water because it’s easier to drink more, faster. I’m drinking way more than I normally do. To my third bottle of water, I added a capful of organic raw apple cider vinegar.

I went out with a friend for lunch, but I brought my own food there. I had carrots, avocado, and juice and it really filled me up.

It’s 4 p.m., time to head home! I noticed that on my drive home, I was a bit sleepy. Around 5 p.m. once home, I got a headache. I didn't take any meds, but instead took a hot bath and inhaled some lavender essential oil.

Headaches and other mild discomforts are a natural part of most cleanses, and are part of what’s called the "healing crisis." When your body purges toxins, it can naturally lead to such symptoms.

I am keeping a commitment to exercise in some capacity every single day during the Complete Body Cleanse, which, of course, includes this Colon Cleanse. I really wasn’t feeling it today with the headache, but I did 100 crunches and a 60-second plank. Exercise and moving your body keep the toxins moving out of your body, so it’s helpful.

Every evening of the Colon Cleanse, I take six capsules of Oxy-Powder, an oxygenated colon cleanser that really gets things moving. Oxy-Powder is the best colon cleansing product that I’ve ever used. You take it at night and it works gently and very effectively. The next day, there’s no cramping — just simple, easy elimination. I like that I can check off the supplements I take in the instruction booklet.

Saturday — Day 2

Supplements

2 Latero-Flora + 6 Oxy-Powder

Water

60 ounces

Breakfast

1 cup rooibos tea

1 banana

3 dried apricots

1 unsweetened applesauce cup topped with cinnamon

Lunch

5 jicama tacos

4 oz. homemade guacamole

Snack

2 cups cold-pressed orange-pineapple-mango juice

½ cup blackberries/blueberries

Few sips mango kombucha

½ cup chopped Medjool dates in coconut flour

Dinner

6 jicama tacos

4 oz. guacamole

Activity

House cleaning + raking

Rode bike a couple of miles

My healing crisis symptoms continued on day two. It’s good that I started my cleanse on a Friday so that I could relax at home and take it easy. From past experiences, I find that the healing crisis symptoms occur in the first two or three days of a cleanse. I take comfort knowing it will go away soon, and I am doing this for my health!

After some morning tea, I started some house cleaning. I guess I felt like “cleansing” my house as well. Cleansing the body often brings psychological and emotional responses.

Later, my daughter and I started riding our bikes on the greenbelts in our neighborhood, then spontaneously decided to go to a coffee shop, which was not too far. I got a juice while there.

Back home, I took a hot bath with scented Epsom salts — a great part of any bedtime routine. Epsom salt contains magnesium sulfate, which comforts sore muscles and joints. Supportive therapies are encouraged during cleanses and you can turn your bath into a healing hot spring by adding Epsom salts, Bentonite clay, and other health-inducing ingredients. Other therapies that help a cleanse include massage, acupuncture, and saunas.

I am not taking any other supplements during this cleanse — which is what Global Healing recommends. That allows your body to devote its energy to breaking down toxins rather than processing the additional nutrients in supplements. While vitamins, minerals, and other supplements are healthful, it takes energy for the liver and kidneys to break down each and every item consumed. The simpler your diet is during a cleanse, the better the result.

Once in bed, I felt very cold and even started shivering. That was weird because, although it’s a bit cold outside, I keep my house warm. I felt so cold that I dried my hair and then used a heating pad to warm up. I am sure it’s part of the healing crisis. My body is ridding itself of toxins.

Sunday — Day 3

Supplements

2 Latero-Flora + 4 Oxy-Powder

Water

68 ounces

Breakfast

⅓ cup dried Medjool dates in coconut flour

1 cup peach passion tea

1 banana

1 dried apricot

Lunch

½ cup blueberries

1 cup peppermint tea

1 handful of dry roasted macadamia nuts

6 plantain chips

2 tablespoons pine nuts

Dinner

5 jicama tacos

4 oz. guacamole

4 mini-tomatoes

Activity

Stretching

100 crunches

Tae Bo

It’s day three and I have a lot of energy and feel great. I started my day with some stretching and situps and later, at a movie with my daughter, I swapped my normal popcorn-munching habit with snacks from home: chopped dates and blueberries, plus sparkling water. Yay for small victories!

I’m weighing myself every day on this new scale I have that tells body fat, muscle mass, and more, but suffice it to say that I am not at my ideal weight and hope the colon cleanse will help!

As you get older, metabolism slows down, and that is just a natural part of life, but I am trying to increase my muscle mass and strength through exercise of various types, from yoga to running. I know that moving your body is an important part of cleansing because — along with water — it gets things moving and flowing, enabling the toxins to purge from the body.

But so far, as of day 3, I am not losing weight. But again, weight loss is not the main focus of a colon cleanse. It can happen, but often that comes when you have a lot of accumulated, compacted fecal matter in your colon. I’ve done several cleanses, so don’t expect to have much in the way of compacted waste. Since I’ve done many cleanses before, I think my colon is pretty clean overall!

When I got home, I did 40 minutes of Tae Bo. I used to do these years ago — I love Billy Blanks’ energy and I feel like I get an excellent all-over workout.

I only took four Oxy-Powder because I know that four "keeps me going" without being too much.

Monday — Day 4

Supplements

2 Latero-Flora + 4 Oxy-Powder

Water

88 ounces

Breakfast

1 cup rooibos tea

Few sips coconut water

1 banana

1 pear

1 dried banana

½ cup blueberries

⅓ cup green grapes

Snacks

½ bag organic crunchy mango bites

1 banana

Lunch

1 cup carrot sticks

4 oz. spicy guacamole

Dinner

15 plantain chips with ½ avocado

Few sips Mango Tango juice smoothie

Activity

Situps (60)

It was my first day back at work, so I came prepared! I didn’t want to end up hungry and make poor food choices by being tempted by that. I brought the following: a banana, apple, pear, grapefruit, avocado, grapes, blueberries, lemon (to squeeze in my water), dried dates & coconut, dried banana, and a bag of carrots… I laid all the fruits out on my desk, and I found it humorous and it kept my mood high in the morning!

I’m finding it so much easier to drink water at work than at home. Weird. I’m going to the bathroom a lot, are people noticing? I added lemon to all my water today and apple cider vinegar (ACV) to my last 20 ounces.

I went to an Indian place for lunch with two friends. They are doing the colon cleanse also, but not the all-fruit option. I had one small bite of both of their vegan dishes — it was so delish! A bite or two of something else won’t blow the whole program. But my main meal was carrots and guacamole that I brought with me.

Back at the office, my stomach was very gurgly, and I was gassy (unusual for me, even on a cleanse). I wonder if it was the bite of Indian food since I hadn’t had this in the previous days.

I talked to Luis, who said that’s normal because Oxy-Powder releases oxygen in the gut and that feeling means it is working away at the gunk in the colon. The oxygen “eats” away at compacted waste in the colon, which is a key part of the colon cleanse. Knowing the benefits helps offsets any difficulties.

I didn’t end up eating all the fruits I brought to work but I did eat some and left some for tomorrow. I'm not eating all that much, but I wasn’t hungry at all during the day. Or when I felt hunger, that is, I ate some fruit and felt fine.

In the evening, I ate a few plantain chips and felt a little guilty because they are not fruit per se. But they aren't too bad because they’re really just bananas; the only thing they’re introducing that I hadn’t been eating is oil.

Tuesday — Day 5

Supplements

2 Latero-Flora + 4 Oxy-Powder

Water

104 ounces

Breakfast

1.5 cups mango juice smoothie

1 cup rooibos tea

1 dried banana

1 banana

1 Gala apple

1 cup coconut water

Lunch

1 cup raw kale salad

⅓ cup quinoa salad

2 red potatoes in oil

½ cup corn-arugula salad

½ bottle turmeric golden milk

¼ bottle sparkling prebiotic tonic — ginger/turmeric/lemon

Snacks

6 organic carrot sticks, dried

⅓ bag dried crunchy mango bites

Dinner

½ avocado w/Himalayan pink salt

Activity

Ran for 40 min

Lunges & calf raises

Happy to nearing the end of the colon cleanse and proud of myself for beginning this health journey.

I'm finding it to be harder than I thought to eat only fruit! I had a few salad items at lunch that were not all fruit, but still, I ate no meat, dairy, eggs, sugar, or gluten, and no processed foods. I’m noticing a connection I have to emotional eating. If I’m stressed or down in any way, I crave comfort foods.

Noticing these patterns is just one positive aspect of a cleanse — they become much more obvious when you eat simply.

Cleanses can serve many positive purposes, not just cleansing out the colon. First, it’s the act of eliminating poor dietary choices which gives your digestive system a break and purges toxins.

Second, cleanses help me to eliminate poor diet choices even after it’s over. In the past, I’ve permanently given up diet soda, caffeine, gluten, and other things during and after different cleanses.

But I also use the cleanse as a time to reflect and observe. As mentioned, I am noticing this pattern — which I know is common — to eat out of emotions. Eating can be a comfort and a habit, beyond the nutritive value. That’s something I want to focus on, even after the cleanse ends.

At home, I went for a long run with my daughter. We ran for about 40 minutes. In fact, I ran further than I have in a long time. That felt so great!

I’ve had no wine all week, and I love a good glass of red wine in the evenings. In fact, I haven’t had any in a few weeks — another positive aspect of the cleanse for my health.

Wednesday — Day 6

Supplements

2 Latero-Flora + 2 Oxy-Powder

Water

88 ounces

Breakfast

Rooibos tea

1 banana

1 cup strawberries, raspberries, blueberries

½ bottle mango juice smoothie

½ bottle turmeric golden milk

1 grapefruit

1 dried apricot

Lunch

2 red potatoes

¼ cup corn arugula salad

¼ cup quinoa salad

⅔ cup roasted zucchini & sweet potato mix

⅓ cup roasted okra

⅓ bag dried carrots

Dinner

Leftover salads

Activity

25-minute yoga flow

Arm weights

At work in the morning, I talked to one of our Customer Satisfaction specialists who said that it’s not ideal to drink store-bought juices during cleanses because they remove parts of the juice like pectin and enzymes during the pasteurization process. It’s fine to drink homemade juices, even better if you use a juicer that leaves the pulp.

I ate half of a grapefruit before our morning meetings, and it made me hungrier! But I know it’s good for me. In the meeting, my stomach was rumbling and I was super hungry. I had a dried apricot and finished the grapefruit afterward.

I’m adding some ACV and lemon to my water. I didn’t use to love the flavor of ACV, but I know it’s good for me, and the more you drink it, the better it tastes! I do prefer the taste with ACV + lemon to just ACV.

I went to a natural grocery store for lunch again and ended up eating again from the salad bar. I never thought I’d say this, but I’m looking forward to the Liver Cleanse which comes next on the Complete Body Cleanse — because I can eat other stuff!

When I got home, I was kind of struggling with low energy and motivation, but I’m not sure why. I know that emotions can come up during any cleanse, especially as you get into deeper cleansing — in other words, when you’ve done several. I’m really proud of myself for sticking with it, and for exercising daily!

Today, when I didn’t feel motivated to exercise, I found a 30-day yoga video series online. We can do hard things! The first one was a simple 25-minute flow. Then I did some arm weights — biceps, triceps, shoulders — afterward. I was so glad I pushed myself to do it and it made me feel proud that I stuck to my commitment. Mentally, I feel recentered and that is a good way to finish the cleanse.

Because supportive therapies are helpful during a cleanse, and I plan to reward myself with a massage this weekend and go to the chiropractor next Tuesday. That’s a great way to end these six days and transition to the liver cleanse, the next step in the Complete Body Cleanse I’m doing!

Overall Experience

I feel really happy and “clean” because I ate very healthy throughout the entire program. I feel good about what I’m putting into my body. I feel great about exercising every day, whether it’s a day where I push myself with 40 minutes of running, a gentle yoga flow, or even just a few crunches.

I am seeing that my stomach is flatter, and my digestive system feels clean. Since I just finished, I can’t say how my digestion is going to be after, but from past experience I find cleanses make me very regular — like clockwork! It takes a couple of days for Oxy-Powder’s effects to gradually wear off, and the colon to fill back up with more substantial food.

Doing something structured like this cleanse helps me in other areas of my life. Knowing I'm cleansing with a goal of weight loss, it helps motivate me to keep going on the exercise, knowing I’m improving my overall health.

The baby steps of some small exercise when I don’t have the energy for something more really helps me. And while exercising during a cleanse is not absolutely essential, it really helps move things through your system and makes you healthier in the process.

Advice

Plan your meals in advance, especially if you work. I found breakfast the easiest because I would just bring fruit. For lunch, I would bring fruit and raw veggies, but the time I went out with a friend, I got tempted to go back and get some of that delicious food the next day! Even if it was plant-based without any wheat, gluten, soy, etc., it was cooked when I was initially aiming for raw.

Also, when you eat out, it’s really hard to know what is in your salad dressing or whatever, even when you order something pretty healthy. So I definitely recommend sticking to bringing your own food if you want to be strict about the cleanse.

To remember to take my supplements, I put the bottles on my bathroom counter. I took Latero-Flora in the morning and Oxy-Powder the evening before bed.

I started out with the recommended six capsules of Oxy-Powder but reduced to four as that worked better for me at work. In an ideal world, I would have followed the protocol more precisely, but this was my honest experience. I did not have to rush to the bathroom or have any concerns with that at all. I would usually wake and have a nice hefty BM, and then at work would also go to the bathroom (number two) a couple of times. Other than the one day with a gurgly stomach, I did not experience any stomach upset, diarrhea, or gas.

Everyone has questions during a new cleanse. I had these questions and asked our Customer Satisfaction Team Manager Luis. Here are his answers.

Can I drink store-bought juice?

You can, but it’s not optimal for the colon cleanse. Dr. Group recommends fruits in as close to their natural “live” state as possible. If you drink juice, it’s best to make it yourself.

How long do the effects of Oxy-Powder last?

Its effects last 18 hours. (That makes sense why it seems to loosen the poo, not just the day after you take it, but the following day as well.)

Can I eat dried fruit?

Yes, but be careful not to overeat. It’s not hard to do.

Can I just eat fruit and vegetables, but raw? Why all fruit?

Dr. Group believes fruit is best for cleansing the colon. Fruit is full of both soluble and insoluble fiber, while also containing high levels of vitamins, minerals, antioxidants, and other nutrients.

Can I drink tea in that 20-minute period between taking Latero-Flora and eating?

Yes, it's ok. It does not interfere unless you're taking a probiotic at the same time as oregano tea or oregano oil, which kills probiotics. It will make little to no difference. The 20 minutes is really to ensure enough time for the capsule to open so that it can travel to the small intestine along with the food you are about to ingest.

The post My Remarkable Colon Cleanse Experience: a 7 Day Journal appeared first on Dr. Group's Healthy Living Articles.

My Remarkable Colon Cleanse Experience: a 7 Day Journal published first on https://smartdrinkingweb.tumblr.com/

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My Remarkable Colon Cleanse Experience: a 7 Day Journal

Global Healing Senior Editor Wendee Nicole decided to do the Complete Body Cleanse Program™ — a comprehensive program to detoxify and improve health that will take three to four months to complete — and it starts with a 6-day Colon Cleanse. Not everything eaten on Wendee’s cleanse experience is approved or endorsed by Dr. Group, but this was her experience trying to follow the recommended diet and protocol as closely as possible.

Wendee’s Story

I have a milestone birthday coming up in July, and I want to get in great shape by then. I’m not getting any younger, and I want to lose some weight — my main goal — but also to get healthier overall, including reducing the risk of health ailments in later years by removing toxins from my body. Every time I do a cleanse, it resets my digestion and I feel better. It also gives me an opportunity to set my health intentions anew and even takes on a spiritual element, for me.

Global Healing’s Colon Cleanse Program™ recommends avoiding soy, gluten, red meat (and all meat), high fructose corn syrup, artificial sweeteners, refined sugar, processed foods, canned foods, alcohol, and excess coffee or caffeine, among other things. Instead, I’ll eat a variety of fruits (this includes avocados and tomatoes, which are fruits!).

Every day during the six-day cleanse, I will take Oxy-Powder® and Latero-Flora™ — a single-strain probiotic (Brevibacillus laterosporus). Latero-Flora is a transient probiotic, which means it does not set up shop in your body like other probiotics do, but passes through. However, on the way, it targets harmful organisms that live in the colon, like yeasts.

I know that prevention is the key! Dr. Group says that health begins in the colon — the large intestine — and that’s because we can accumulate years of gunk in there, including toxins and unhealthy microbes. Colon health is the start of good health!

For complete protocol details, check out our article, How To Perform a Colon Cleanse: The Complete Guide.

Below, I detail the supplements I took, how much water I drank, and all the foods I ate — as well as my overall daily experiences.

Friday — Day 1

Supplements

2 Latero-Flora + 6 Oxy-Powder

Water (with lemon)

80 ounces

Breakfast

1 cup blueberries & raspberries

1 cup ginger-mango tea

Few sips mango kombucha

1 cup watermelon chunks

Lunch

1 avocado with sea salt

1 banana

Cold-pressed mixed vegetable-fruit juice

Snack

½ bag crunchy mango bites

1 cup mint-chamomile herbal tea

Dinner

6 jicama tacos (jicama wraps with cucumber and carrots)

4 oz. homemade guacamole

4 mini tomatoes

1 cup watermelon

Activity

100 crunches + plank

Woke up excited about the cleanse! Dr. Group's standard daily recommendation is drinking half your body weight in water daily, but on a cleanse, more is better. I’m drinking from a 20-ounce reusable bottle so I can track how much I drink.

I decided to drink room temperature water because it’s easier to drink more, faster. I’m drinking way more than I normally do. To my third bottle of water, I added a capful of organic raw apple cider vinegar.

I went out with a friend for lunch, but I brought my own food there. I had carrots, avocado, and juice and it really filled me up.

It’s 4 p.m., time to head home! I noticed that on my drive home, I was a bit sleepy. Around 5 p.m. once home, I got a headache. I didn't take any meds, but instead took a hot bath and inhaled some lavender essential oil.

Headaches and other mild discomforts are a natural part of most cleanses, and are part of what’s called the "healing crisis." When your body purges toxins, it can naturally lead to such symptoms.

I am keeping a commitment to exercise in some capacity every single day during the Complete Body Cleanse, which, of course, includes this Colon Cleanse. I really wasn’t feeling it today with the headache, but I did 100 crunches and a 60-second plank. Exercise and moving your body keep the toxins moving out of your body, so it’s helpful.

Every evening of the Colon Cleanse, I take six capsules of Oxy-Powder, an oxygenated colon cleanser that really gets things moving. Oxy-Powder is the best colon cleansing product that I’ve ever used. You take it at night and it works gently and very effectively. The next day, there’s no cramping — just simple, easy elimination. I like that I can check off the supplements I take in the instruction booklet.

Saturday — Day 2

Supplements

2 Latero-Flora + 6 Oxy-Powder

Water

60 ounces

Breakfast

1 cup rooibos tea

1 banana

3 dried apricots

1 unsweetened applesauce cup topped with cinnamon

Lunch

5 jicama tacos

4 oz. homemade guacamole

Snack

2 cups cold-pressed orange-pineapple-mango juice

½ cup blackberries/blueberries

Few sips mango kombucha

½ cup chopped Medjool dates in coconut flour

Dinner

6 jicama tacos

4 oz. guacamole

Activity

House cleaning + raking

Rode bike a couple of miles

My healing crisis symptoms continued on day two. It’s good that I started my cleanse on a Friday so that I could relax at home and take it easy. From past experiences, I find that the healing crisis symptoms occur in the first two or three days of a cleanse. I take comfort knowing it will go away soon, and I am doing this for my health!

After some morning tea, I started some house cleaning. I guess I felt like “cleansing” my house as well. Cleansing the body often brings psychological and emotional responses.

Later, my daughter and I started riding our bikes on the greenbelts in our neighborhood, then spontaneously decided to go to a coffee shop, which was not too far. I got a juice while there.

Back home, I took a hot bath with scented Epsom salts — a great part of any bedtime routine. Epsom salt contains magnesium sulfate, which comforts sore muscles and joints. Supportive therapies are encouraged during cleanses and you can turn your bath into a healing hot spring by adding Epsom salts, Bentonite clay, and other health-inducing ingredients. Other therapies that help a cleanse include massage, acupuncture, and saunas.

I am not taking any other supplements during this cleanse — which is what Global Healing recommends. That allows your body to devote its energy to breaking down toxins rather than processing the additional nutrients in supplements. While vitamins, minerals, and other supplements are healthful, it takes energy for the liver and kidneys to break down each and every item consumed. The simpler your diet is during a cleanse, the better the result.

Once in bed, I felt very cold and even started shivering. That was weird because, although it’s a bit cold outside, I keep my house warm. I felt so cold that I dried my hair and then used a heating pad to warm up. I am sure it’s part of the healing crisis. My body is ridding itself of toxins.

Sunday — Day 3

Supplements

2 Latero-Flora + 4 Oxy-Powder

Water

68 ounces

Breakfast

⅓ cup dried Medjool dates in coconut flour

1 cup peach passion tea

1 banana

1 dried apricot

Lunch

½ cup blueberries

1 cup peppermint tea

1 handful of dry roasted macadamia nuts

6 plantain chips

2 tablespoons pine nuts

Dinner

5 jicama tacos

4 oz. guacamole

4 mini-tomatoes

Activity

Stretching

100 crunches

Tae Bo

It’s day three and I have a lot of energy and feel great. I started my day with some stretching and situps and later, at a movie with my daughter, I swapped my normal popcorn-munching habit with snacks from home: chopped dates and blueberries, plus sparkling water. Yay for small victories!

I’m weighing myself every day on this new scale I have that tells body fat, muscle mass, and more, but suffice it to say that I am not at my ideal weight and hope the colon cleanse will help!

As you get older, metabolism slows down, and that is just a natural part of life, but I am trying to increase my muscle mass and strength through exercise of various types, from yoga to running. I know that moving your body is an important part of cleansing because — along with water — it gets things moving and flowing, enabling the toxins to purge from the body.

But so far, as of day 3, I am not losing weight. But again, weight loss is not the main focus of a colon cleanse. It can happen, but often that comes when you have a lot of accumulated, compacted fecal matter in your colon. I’ve done several cleanses, so don’t expect to have much in the way of compacted waste. Since I’ve done many cleanses before, I think my colon is pretty clean overall!

When I got home, I did 40 minutes of Tae Bo. I used to do these years ago — I love Billy Blanks’ energy and I feel like I get an excellent all-over workout.

I only took four Oxy-Powder because I know that four "keeps me going" without being too much.

Monday — Day 4

Supplements

2 Latero-Flora + 4 Oxy-Powder

Water

88 ounces

Breakfast

1 cup rooibos tea

Few sips coconut water

1 banana

1 pear

1 dried banana

½ cup blueberries

⅓ cup green grapes

Snacks

½ bag organic crunchy mango bites

1 banana

Lunch

1 cup carrot sticks

4 oz. spicy guacamole

Dinner

15 plantain chips with ½ avocado

Few sips Mango Tango juice smoothie

Activity

Situps (60)

It was my first day back at work, so I came prepared! I didn’t want to end up hungry and make poor food choices by being tempted by that. I brought the following: a banana, apple, pear, grapefruit, avocado, grapes, blueberries, lemon (to squeeze in my water), dried dates & coconut, dried banana, and a bag of carrots… I laid all the fruits out on my desk, and I found it humorous and it kept my mood high in the morning!

I’m finding it so much easier to drink water at work than at home. Weird. I’m going to the bathroom a lot, are people noticing? I added lemon to all my water today and apple cider vinegar (ACV) to my last 20 ounces.

I went to an Indian place for lunch with two friends. They are doing the colon cleanse also, but not the all-fruit option. I had one small bite of both of their vegan dishes — it was so delish! A bite or two of something else won’t blow the whole program. But my main meal was carrots and guacamole that I brought with me.

Back at the office, my stomach was very gurgly, and I was gassy (unusual for me, even on a cleanse). I wonder if it was the bite of Indian food since I hadn’t had this in the previous days.

I talked to Luis, who said that’s normal because Oxy-Powder releases oxygen in the gut and that feeling means it is working away at the gunk in the colon. The oxygen “eats” away at compacted waste in the colon, which is a key part of the colon cleanse. Knowing the benefits helps offsets any difficulties.

I didn’t end up eating all the fruits I brought to work but I did eat some and left some for tomorrow. I'm not eating all that much, but I wasn’t hungry at all during the day. Or when I felt hunger, that is, I ate some fruit and felt fine.

In the evening, I ate a few plantain chips and felt a little guilty because they are not fruit per se. But they aren't too bad because they’re really just bananas; the only thing they’re introducing that I hadn’t been eating is oil.

Tuesday — Day 5

Supplements

2 Latero-Flora + 4 Oxy-Powder

Water

104 ounces

Breakfast

1.5 cups mango juice smoothie

1 cup rooibos tea

1 dried banana

1 banana

1 Gala apple

1 cup coconut water

Lunch

1 cup raw kale salad

⅓ cup quinoa salad

2 red potatoes in oil

½ cup corn-arugula salad

½ bottle turmeric golden milk

¼ bottle sparkling prebiotic tonic — ginger/turmeric/lemon

Snacks

6 organic carrot sticks, dried

⅓ bag dried crunchy mango bites

Dinner

½ avocado w/Himalayan pink salt

Activity

Ran for 40 min

Lunges & calf raises

Happy to nearing the end of the colon cleanse and proud of myself for beginning this health journey.

I'm finding it to be harder than I thought to eat only fruit! I had a few salad items at lunch that were not all fruit, but still, I ate no meat, dairy, eggs, sugar, or gluten, and no processed foods. I’m noticing a connection I have to emotional eating. If I’m stressed or down in any way, I crave comfort foods.

Noticing these patterns is just one positive aspect of a cleanse — they become much more obvious when you eat simply.

Cleanses can serve many positive purposes, not just cleansing out the colon. First, it’s the act of eliminating poor dietary choices which gives your digestive system a break and purges toxins.

Second, cleanses help me to eliminate poor diet choices even after it’s over. In the past, I’ve permanently given up diet soda, caffeine, gluten, and other things during and after different cleanses.

But I also use the cleanse as a time to reflect and observe. As mentioned, I am noticing this pattern — which I know is common — to eat out of emotions. Eating can be a comfort and a habit, beyond the nutritive value. That’s something I want to focus on, even after the cleanse ends.

At home, I went for a long run with my daughter. We ran for about 40 minutes. In fact, I ran further than I have in a long time. That felt so great!

I’ve had no wine all week, and I love a good glass of red wine in the evenings. In fact, I haven’t had any in a few weeks — another positive aspect of the cleanse for my health.

Wednesday — Day 6

Supplements

2 Latero-Flora + 2 Oxy-Powder

Water

88 ounces

Breakfast

Rooibos tea

1 banana

1 cup strawberries, raspberries, blueberries

½ bottle mango juice smoothie

½ bottle turmeric golden milk

1 grapefruit

1 dried apricot

Lunch

2 red potatoes

¼ cup corn arugula salad

¼ cup quinoa salad

⅔ cup roasted zucchini & sweet potato mix

⅓ cup roasted okra

⅓ bag dried carrots

Dinner

Leftover salads

Activity

25-minute yoga flow

Arm weights

At work in the morning, I talked to one of our Customer Satisfaction specialists who said that it’s not ideal to drink store-bought juices during cleanses because they remove parts of the juice like pectin and enzymes during the pasteurization process. It’s fine to drink homemade juices, even better if you use a juicer that leaves the pulp.

I ate half of a grapefruit before our morning meetings, and it made me hungrier! But I know it’s good for me. In the meeting, my stomach was rumbling and I was super hungry. I had a dried apricot and finished the grapefruit afterward.

I’m adding some ACV and lemon to my water. I didn’t use to love the flavor of ACV, but I know it’s good for me, and the more you drink it, the better it tastes! I do prefer the taste with ACV + lemon to just ACV.

I went to a natural grocery store for lunch again and ended up eating again from the salad bar. I never thought I’d say this, but I’m looking forward to the Liver Cleanse which comes next on the Complete Body Cleanse — because I can eat other stuff!

When I got home, I was kind of struggling with low energy and motivation, but I’m not sure why. I know that emotions can come up during any cleanse, especially as you get into deeper cleansing — in other words, when you’ve done several. I’m really proud of myself for sticking with it, and for exercising daily!

Today, when I didn’t feel motivated to exercise, I found a 30-day yoga video series online. We can do hard things! The first one was a simple 25-minute flow. Then I did some arm weights — biceps, triceps, shoulders — afterward. I was so glad I pushed myself to do it and it made me feel proud that I stuck to my commitment. Mentally, I feel recentered and that is a good way to finish the cleanse.

Because supportive therapies are helpful during a cleanse, and I plan to reward myself with a massage this weekend and go to the chiropractor next Tuesday. That’s a great way to end these six days and transition to the liver cleanse, the next step in the Complete Body Cleanse I’m doing!

Overall Experience

I feel really happy and “clean” because I ate very healthy throughout the entire program. I feel good about what I’m putting into my body. I feel great about exercising every day, whether it’s a day where I push myself with 40 minutes of running, a gentle yoga flow, or even just a few crunches.

I am seeing that my stomach is flatter, and my digestive system feels clean. Since I just finished, I can’t say how my digestion is going to be after, but from past experience I find cleanses make me very regular — like clockwork! It takes a couple of days for Oxy-Powder’s effects to gradually wear off, and the colon to fill back up with more substantial food.

Doing something structured like this cleanse helps me in other areas of my life. Knowing I'm cleansing with a goal of weight loss, it helps motivate me to keep going on the exercise, knowing I’m improving my overall health.

The baby steps of some small exercise when I don’t have the energy for something more really helps me. And while exercising during a cleanse is not absolutely essential, it really helps move things through your system and makes you healthier in the process.

Advice

Plan your meals in advance, especially if you work. I found breakfast the easiest because I would just bring fruit. For lunch, I would bring fruit and raw veggies, but the time I went out with a friend, I got tempted to go back and get some of that delicious food the next day! Even if it was plant-based without any wheat, gluten, soy, etc., it was cooked when I was initially aiming for raw.

Also, when you eat out, it’s really hard to know what is in your salad dressing or whatever, even when you order something pretty healthy. So I definitely recommend sticking to bringing your own food if you want to be strict about the cleanse.

To remember to take my supplements, I put the bottles on my bathroom counter. I took Latero-Flora in the morning and Oxy-Powder the evening before bed.

I started out with the recommended six capsules of Oxy-Powder but reduced to four as that worked better for me at work. In an ideal world, I would have followed the protocol more precisely, but this was my honest experience. I did not have to rush to the bathroom or have any concerns with that at all. I would usually wake and have a nice hefty BM, and then at work would also go to the bathroom (number two) a couple of times. Other than the one day with a gurgly stomach, I did not experience any stomach upset, diarrhea, or gas.

Everyone has questions during a new cleanse. I had these questions and asked our Customer Satisfaction Team Manager Luis. Here are his answers.

Can I drink store-bought juice?

You can, but it’s not optimal for the colon cleanse. Dr. Group recommends fruits in as close to their natural “live” state as possible. If you drink juice, it’s best to make it yourself.

How long do the effects of Oxy-Powder last?

Its effects last 18 hours. (That makes sense why it seems to loosen the poo, not just the day after you take it, but the following day as well.)

Can I eat dried fruit?

Yes, but be careful not to overeat. It’s not hard to do.

Can I just eat fruit and vegetables, but raw? Why all fruit?

Dr. Group believes fruit is best for cleansing the colon. Fruit is full of both soluble and insoluble fiber, while also containing high levels of vitamins, minerals, antioxidants, and other nutrients.

Can I drink tea in that 20-minute period between taking Latero-Flora and eating?

Yes, it's ok. It does not interfere unless you're taking a probiotic at the same time as oregano tea or oregano oil, which kills probiotics. It will make little to no difference. The 20 minutes is really to ensure enough time for the capsule to open so that it can travel to the small intestine along with the food you are about to ingest.

The post My Remarkable Colon Cleanse Experience: a 7 Day Journal appeared first on Dr. Group's Healthy Living Articles.

My Remarkable Colon Cleanse Experience: a 7 Day Journal published first on https://nootropicspowdersupplier.tumblr.com/

[forwardtillthefinish]

“I don’t need a crown to know that I’m a queen” - Queen Bee Half Marathon

What an event, after the disappointment that was The Berlin Marathon. I went to Cincinnati hoping for a good weekend, a fun race and boost to the spirit. I can honestly say, Cincinnati and the Queen Bee Half Marathon delivered in full!

The worst part about the entire weekend was the 8.5 hour drive. My traveling partner had to drop out and I couldn’t get anyone to come with so I braved the drive alone. I highly recommend comedy podcasts for long drives with Pandora station breaks in the middle. During the drive, I decided that I wanted to go straight to the expo for two reasons: stretch my legs and to make sure I wouldn’t be out all night after a day of travel.

The expo was two fold. Not only was it packet pick up for the race but also it was connected to a wellness expo presented by Kroger. At this point I was glad I drove because the swag and samples were endless. I got a thank you first for being an ambassador,a few premium items for being a half marathoner, a full bag of beauty samples, another bag of snack samples and not to mention all the snacks and such I had at the expo. By the time I got to my car, my arms were so tired! But everything I picked up was something I could use or will use now that I’ve tried it. If I had planned my trip better, I would have gotten there earlier to see some of the demonstrations they had as well.

After the expo, I made my way to my AirBnB that was a short 10 min from downtown. Laid out my stuff, laid out my race stuff, settled in and ate the dinner I brought with me from home and called it an early night.

The next morning, I got up and headed towards the downtown area and picked a parking lot based on cost and seeing women in cold weather running gear. This proved to be a smart choice as I was able to park most of the day for $5. Little did I know how long I was actually going to stay at the finish line but I’ll get to that later. After paying and eating my breakfast, I started following ladies to the start.

The start was well laid out, gear check busses, a super amount of porta potties (which were sparkling clean before and after the race!), and easy to get into corrals. For once, I was not super early so I didn’t have a lot of time to loiter but was able to get two trips to the potty and had a great chat with another woman who had mentioned she was last in the past. What this woman didn’t know is that she really comforted me by telling me that the organizers really are back of the pack friendly per her past experiences. As that conversation wrapped up, it was time to start the race.

I’m not sure why it surprised me but even with the 7:30am start, the sun had not yet completely risen. But I didn’t mind as it didn’t seem to make much difference as it was a chilly day. I knew this race started on a hill but man! The climb was consistent for about two full miles. But the views from the top were completely worth the climb. You could see the river and sun peaking over, it was absolutely gorgeous.

Also within the first couple miles, more snacks than I have seen in a full marathon course. I’m taking Krispy Kreme doughnut holes, chocolate of all types. As the race went on, you didn’t even need your own fuel- Swedish fish, gummies, crasins, Oreos, butter cookies, more chocolate- and even orange segments that had been peeled so you didn’t have to throw the peel on the ground! If that wasn’t enough, there were people handing out tissues almost every other mile. The race organizers clearly have thought of everything.

Along the way, I struck up a couple conversations with ladies from all over. One lady, Tena, was doing her first half marathon at age 72 after multiple surgeries. She was with her daughter, Christine, and friend, Mary. And they really helped me stay on track. I hung with them for a majority of the middle of the race. Towards the end, I found another lady who I had been going back and forth with. Her story was incredible. After dealing with so much physical and emotional issues, she was getting back into running. Around mile 10, I noticed someone handing out beers and mimosas. I asked them to pour me some

Champagne and they said sure! So I stopped, walked and drank a glass of champagne. As I was finishing that up, I came across a woman that was having awful cramps- so bad that you could see them. I always carry extra saltstick just in case. I offered her two tablets and helped her get her water bottle out of her belt. I later found out she decided not to go on but her husband was able to get a medal for her.

The best part about the back half of this race is that it is all down hill after about mile 7. Of course the climbs on the front half of the race caused some fatigue but I felt pretty good coming into the finish line.

After getting through the finish, it was the standard recovery items offered- water, a salty snack, chocolate milk, medal. But just past the finish there was a mini festival where they had an additional finishers item- ear muffs, sunflowers, mimosas, massages, half off race official gear (where I picked up some Queen Bee Goodrs) and plenty food.

Being an ambassador for the race, I had been invited to the VIBee area. There was food, sweets, adult beverages and cute little gifts. I had only planned to swing by say hi and head back to my car but instead I met some really cool ladies who I ended up drinking quite a bit of champagne with. We shared races we loved, what our next plans were and chatted until they basically kicked us out of the tent.

After going back to the AirBnB, showering and taking a quick nap, I headed out to meet my sorority sister Sophie and her boyfriend Will for dinner and BLINK. To be honest, I didn’t understand how artsy and cool Cincinnati was. Between getting some amazing tacos at Coronado and then walking through the streets with music and art installations I was impressed. What a cool weekend for the city, race by day and party by night.

I would recommend Queen Bee and a weekend trip to Cincy to anyone looking for a get away, I would just recommend you fly if you are coming from VA.

Can’t wait to go back for the Flying Pig weekend in the spring!

[toldnews-blog]

New Post has been published on https://toldnews.com/lifestyle/cemetery-was-the-right-vibe-for-a-glamour-goth-wedding/

Cemetery was the right vibe for a glamour goth wedding

Grossan, a music aficionado, and the rock musician Ayers, who has jazz in his blood, aren’t the “wedding factory” types. (Elizabeth Lippman/The New York Times)

Molly Creeden

Just months after they started dating more than two years ago, Ally Jane Grossan and Nabil Ayers felt certain they were headed for marriage, and it was with as much surety that they didn’t want their wedding to feel formulaic and familiar.

“We wanted to get married somewhere that’s isn’t a wedding factory,” said Grossan, a founder of Brooklyn FI, a financial planning firm geared to creatives and tech entrepreneurs in New York. “It’s always the same: a beautiful space, flowers and salmon or chicken, and we just wanted to do something that wasn’t that.”

By many markers, the couple’s evening wedding on Thursday, Dec. 20, in the Masonic Lodge at the Hollywood Forever Cemetery could not be typecast. There was DJ Gregg Foreman — lithe former music director for the musician Cat Power with Joan Jett hair — who played songs by the Cure on the piano. There was the bride’s walk down the aisle with her parents, to the cascading drumbeats of the eerie first bars of “Atmosphere” by post-punk band Joy Division. There was the irrevocable fact that several yards away, entertainment industry legacies — from Mickey Rooney to Johnny Ramone — lay deceased.

“I don’t know why, I’ve always loved cemeteries,” said Grossan, 30. “Père Lachaise in Paris is one of my favorite places; Green-Wood in Brooklyn. I don’t think they’re morbid. I think they’re beautiful.” Ayers, 46, agreed: “It’s like a beautiful park.”

It was at another wedding reception in June 2016 at House of Yes, an events space in Bushwick, Brooklyn, where Ayers first spotted Grossan. “I remember thinking, who is that beautiful woman standing there?” he said. The two were in attendance to celebrate the marriage of respective co-workers: Anna Bond, with whom Ayers worked at 4AD, an independent record label where he is the US label manager, and the groom, J Edward Keyes, who was Grossan’s then-boss at Bandcamp, a self-publishing music platform where she was a senior editor.

Ayers waited to make his move until he saw Grossan chatting with Joan LeMay, a friend from Seattle, where from 1997 to 2008, he ran Sonic Boom Records and was a drummer in indie rock bands like the Long Winters. Ayers greeted his friend, who introduced him to Grossan. “My first impression was that he was wearing this fabulous suit with cool glasses,” she said of Ayers’ signature oversize frames.

The pair spoke for a few minutes before rejoining the party, and then found each other again, talking for an hour against the backdrop of karaoke. They spoke about music. At 24, Grossan had been appointed the series editor of the publisher Bloomsbury’s 33-1/3 Series, a collection of biographies about individual music albums and artists. “I, and anyone else who had ever heard about it, was impressed by that,” Ayers said.

Ayers is the son of noted jazz composer and vibraphonist Roy Ayers, with whom he has had a distant relationship. He was given a drum set at age 2 by his uncle, jazz musician Alan Braufman, and has made music his lifeblood since.

Nabil Ayers, center, and Ally Jane Grossan are lifted during “Hava Nagila” at their wedding reception at the Masonic Lodge at the Hollywood Forever Cemetery in Los Angeles. (Elizabeth Lippman/The New York Times)

“I remember someone telling me that night: ‘Oh that’s Nabil Ayers from 4AD, that guy’s a big shot,’” Grossan said. After the two parted ways, Grossan followed Ayers on Twitter in the Uber ride back to her home in Crown Heights, Brooklyn.

The next day, Ayers reached out to LeMay with a request: Could she ask Grossan to pass along her email address? Once in hand, Ayers sent Grossan a casual message mentioning Skee-Ball, which Grossan had revealed was a talent. Two days later, Ayers was surprised he hadn’t heard back. “I thought it was weird. We’d gotten along well, and my friend had asked her if it was OK to get in touch.”

After giving the go-ahead, Grossan thought it was odd that she hadn’t heard from Ayers. “I checked the spam folder and was like, ‘No way, this doesn’t happen.’” There was Ayers’s email from his 4AD address.

Grossan responded immediately and the two made plans to meet the following Sunday for a drink. On the Thursday evening beforehand, however, Grossan was seated at a table in the Hammerstein Ballroom at the Libera Awards — a ceremony honoring the indie music community — and heard Ayers’ name announced. She looked up to see him walking on stage to accept an award on behalf of singer/songwriter Grimes for the video “Kill V. Maim.” Grossan emailed him: “Short and sweet — great speech.”

They found each other after the program and Grossan invited Ayers to join a group heading to a karaoke bar (note: for how much karaoke appears in this story, the groom does not particularly enjoy it). There, jammed into a bench with industry peers, Ayers was enchanted as Grossan sang the grim, rapid fire lyrics to System of a Down’s “Chop Suey” with perfect elocution. “She took her shoes off for the song, and I was like, ‘Whoa, she’s really going to do it,’” Ayers said. “I was really impressed.”

The group dispersed and Grossan and Ayers wound up at New Wonjo in Koreatown, talking over cold noodles late into the night. That night the couple kissed for the first time.

It would be the first of many dates.

“Most of the men in the music journalism space are obnoxious: They’re proud of knowing the names of every single album,” Grossan said. “But Nabil knows more that everyone and is so understated. He never tries to display his knowledge to anyone. He’s just excited to talk about it.”

Like the tongue-twisting lyrics to Chop Suey, the relationship moved at a heady clip. On an early date, Grossan mentioned that her favorite album was Hole’s Celebrity Skin; several weeks later, on her birthday in July, Ayers gave her a copy in vinyl. That month, the pair decided on impulse that Grossan would be Ayers’ date to a September wedding in Paris. And in October, Ayers met Grossan’s father, television producer Mark Grossan, in a hot tub during Orange County’s Beach Goth music festival. By Christmas, they had plans for Ally Jane Grossan to move into Ayers’ Brooklyn Heights apartment when her lease was up in May.

In early 2018, Ayers began looking for rings to propose to Grossan. Once he found one — a vintage emerald-cut diamond with two baguettes that reminded him of the art deco angles of the Chrysler Building — he put his plan in motion. He had arranged to have Julien Baker, Grossan’s favorite musician, perform a private serenade during the Sasquatch Music Festival in George, Washington, on May 25, 2018.

But the couple was running late that day. Grossan got her first speeding ticket while they were en route to the Gorge Ampitheater from Seattle. She was frazzled as Ayers hurried her through security, texting with Baker’s manager about the mere minutes they had before the musician was due on stage. Telling Grossan they were hurrying to meet a friend at a backstage video shoot, Ayers wove them through the 20,000-person crowd, past the tour buses, and around a bend behind the stage. There, they found Baker and her violinist on a cliff overlooking the gorge. She started playing Love Me Tender by Elvis. When the violin solo began, Ayers dropped to one knee and asked Grossan to marry him.

The couple chose to marry in Los Angeles, where Grossan grew up and where her grandparents, Murray and Rosalyn Grossan, 95 and 94, live. (They were unable, however, to attend the wedding). Ayers had recently organised a show at the Hollywood Cemetery and thought it might dually be suitable for matrimony. On the summer day when Grossan and her mother toured the cemetery for a visit, the staff was cleaning up the site of the memorial for Chris Cornell, Soundgarden’s frontman.

Nabil Ayers, right, and Ally Jane Grossan at their wedding reception at the Masonic Lodge at the Hollywood Forever Cemetery in Los Angeles, (Elizabeth Lippman/The New York Times)

On the evening of December 20, however, morbidity was the last thing on the minds of the 125 friends and family who gathered in the temple of Masonic Lodge in festive interpretations of “glamour goth,” the couple’s suggested attire for guests. This meant oversize earrings, peacock feathers, sparkly slides, tattooed fingers, faux fur and evening gowns, with an over-index of black rimmed glasses paired with long rocker hair.

“Each of you are glowing tonight, and the love of life that you are share with each other helps to light this world around us,” said the officiant, Rabbi Michele Ellise Lenke, under a white huppah in the temple room, which was a vision in crimson, from carpet to walls, with a Masonic Eastern Star hanging in the center. “Julien Baker may sing about turning the lights out,” the rabbi said, “but my wish for you is to keep shining bright.”

In his vows, Ayers spoke of his respect for Grossan’s drive and ambition, and called her his motivation in life. “I’ve always been a happy person,” he said. “It’s become clear to me that you’ve always been a happy person. So it’s hard to believe that I would meet someone who has made me infinitely happier, but you’ve done that.”

Grossan, who is taking her husband’s last name, praised his accomplishments and his “infectious warmth.” “Waiters, bartenders, shopkeepers and strangers we meet are immediately drawn to you,” she said. “It’s like the whole world is completely in love with you, but not as much as me. I vow to protect and cherish that feeling.”

In toasts over dinner in the building’s Eastern Star Room, where guests drank sparkling Topo Chico water, natural libations from Silverlake’s Psychic Wines, and ate a Mediterranean buffet feast, Ayers was referred to by a co-worker, Gabe Spierer, as “the nicest guy in rock.”

(“Not only rock, but one of the nicest guys in earth, wind and water,” Matt Berninger, the frontman for the rock band the National amended later in the evening).

Ayers’ mother Louise Vesper, a former ballet dancer, recalled seeing the body language between the couple for the first time, and praised the fact that “in their busy lives, they still make time for their parents.” The party moved back across the hall to the Masonic Temple for dancing, and then onto an after party at Brass Monkey — for karaoke, of course.

[fwdthinker]

THE DREAM OF MY CHILDHOOD FRIEND AS A BULL (2014)

Photograph: Erzherzog-Johann-Brücke, Graz

I dreamt one night that I was about to fight in an arena with my best friend who became a bull in the ring. I really envisioned him as an animal in the dream. It's hard to remember all the details of a dream you had ages ago, but I remember fractions, small pieces of what happened in that dream, and when I woke up, I remember the feeling of betrayal. This state, the state of feeling betrayed changes a man and goes unbelievably far, making you more caucious, makes you doubt people more in general, twists your perspective on even your closest friends. You begin looking at them as your enemeies, like they mean you harm, sometimes you despise what makes them different from you, what essentialy makes them, them, but thats probably the side-effect of any low in your life. Naturally, the most malicious hatered and disgust goes to the person who betrayed you. Back when I was a kid I hated when I made friends with someone and that someone just goes off and plays with some other kid made extremely jealous and yes, betrayed. Kidish stuff, I cried a lot when somebody didn't call me to play. Nowdays I don’t think much of that, it’s kinda wierd, it’s kinda cute but I'm a wierd kid with wierd dreams, and the dream I'm trying to wrap my mind arround still bothers me. By the time the dream was over, something gained a real influence on my decisions. It binded with my naked consciousness.  After these dream sequences i felt like changed forever. When that dream came to mind, I felt like my body was filled with this cold gooey green liquid, which spread from my lungs and my heart to the brain and the rest of the body. I felt this emptiness overcoming me, and at the same time feeling kinda thirsty. Something inside me shut off, it was as if this matter was killing my emotions and inserting this blankness inside me, like somebody inserted corrupted floppy disk in my brain. It transfered itself into the reality and I was left with this feeling of a dream, that became more powerful as more i thought of it. I acessed it knowingly from time to time to process it, to be intentionally sad, and other times it just came to me. Years later it would come to me whilst I was stimulating my senses with music or movies from the TV or my Sony Walkman. Suddenly, as if a huge low hit me, and i would leave this world and float into the sun. And It was the same feeling of emptyness, but this time it had a visual manifestation of a sunset which was very warm. If you would paint half of the paper blue, the other half of the paper reddish orange, and a yellow sun in the middle, that is how I felt. I know it sounds weird, but imagine: firstly, not feeling anything arround you, your vision is overtaken by this picture of a sunset in which you get so absorbed that you see nothing more(it is like somebody inserted something in your brain a foil for a retro projector), and feeling empty and overtaken by this feeling that you know lacks something bigger, but is just so mesmerising that you cannot move at all untill it passes. Afterwards I usually felt that my stomach was missing or something else in my torso area. I just felt this massive hole inside me. I would usually drink a lot of water in order to fix myself. I drank enormous ammounts of water afterwards, sometimes I drank so much water that I felt like I was going to pass out. 

The original dream sequence didin't go on for just one night, it just kinda stuck and i dreamt the same thing three or more nights in a row. Knowing i was stuck in this dream chain, i got very scared that i will never dream anything else. This was a really dark dream that i didn't want to go back to. Back then I was in elementary school. And being a nine year old kid in an industrial city, where i moved to at the age of 6, because of the good-hearted intention of my parents judgement that this dirty town would be the place where i would recieve a proper education, friends and overall a better enviroment. But the decision wasn't based on my future alone, thats just a story to make things sounds sweeter than they actually are. In truth, there were many much more practical, believable and overall more realistic reasons why my parents chose to move. My mom worked in Zenica for a very long time. She would take the bus every day to go to work, sometimes my dad would drive her, but the bus is as she likes to say "more convinient and it doesn't cost gas or your fathers time" My father, back then, was busy with leading the political scene in my Birthtown, he was the Canton president and a local representative of the BDP party. He was very absent during my childhood, i remember him always working and mumbling at the table, i once caused a short circuit to go off and he said "What are you doing? Stop that." but didn't get up from the table and just continued to mumble and look at the imense papers he stacked at his office table, which was by the way in the same room as the living room was, where basically everything was. But as the poles sank, and as the top dog went down as a breeze, his efforts fell into the water of a stream which carried them away into underwater cave where they were left unpraised, undone and worthless.. He basically got very angry with politics in general and chose to never mess with it again, so we moved. He didn't vote from that day on.

I gained a couple of friends here, some of them for life, some of them for a year, some chose to change schools later, whether for practical reasons like moving to a different part of town or for thinking the school didn't appriciate them enough as students or something. I was a grade B student, my whole life. I was always a grade B student. My first grade was a B. I was always far from perfect. Maybe I had two or three times in my life a complete visual representation of what i was talking about in my head. My friends were grade A students, mostly. This one kid that lived down the street for me, his parents were very strict, so i mean, he had to get it right all the time. This other kid which i went to play with on the first day of school and we played from then on often was horrible at writing and reading and stuff, but very good at everything else. What bothered me about these people is that they weren't very eager to play with me, all of the time. I guess I wanted attention all the time. Maybe it wasn't that they weren't eager. I think i saw them back then as a little bit cold-hearted. I was a very warm "little person" if you may call it, i was naive, fat and a little bit slow at times. But everybody reffered to me as "good person Ned" instead of just ned. I said my feelings all the time, and most of the time got hurt. I was very polite, and all the grannies said that. I really liked being polite to older people. They are so easy to accomodatte and impress.  I didn't meet somebody who behaved in a similar way, or posessed the same manners i did. Untill I met, Marco.

The same events continiued to occur every time closed my eyes at night. There are three elements of this dream, the audience/the sequenced surroundings where there were the people, cheering for the bull. And then in the middle of it all, there was me and Marco. We used to be really good friends friends but he had this really crazy grandmother, who was very caring of him, but in a very exaggerating kind of way, i can't explain. For me it always felt wierd when she showed up. I could find many examples of her unusual behaviour, but luckily she wasn't in this dream. This dream represented everything Marco isn't. Marco was a nice guy, a really nice guy, he wasn't very clean though, he didn't clean his fingernails and he cut them once in a month or less. There was this black filth, which was made up of mud and germs beneath his fingernails. He didn't shower or bathe much, and he only ate one brand of chocolate, which is kinda wierd, I guess. It's like he based everything upon feeling like it or not. In guess you could say he is mildly authistic, if you were a regular kid you would've think of him as a bit retarded and look down upon him constantly. That guy could drink a tower of sparkling water in a day, because he loved the stuff, Marco didn't do much except study when his grandparents forced him to, and play videogames all day. His mother left him to live with her parents to move to Germany, and I don't know if thats the only reason for it, but I can say this woman looked very coquette and my guess is she went there to become a prostitute or something. -  Even though I am talking about real people here I won’t abstain from bashing them, everybody gets what they deserve. There were rumours about that, I don't know how i managed to hear them, since I was a kid and I didn't take interest in gossip Also, I am not stating this to be true, I‘m just saying the woman looks like your average hooker. Even though I played a huge role in Marcos life back then I was a pawn to them and they didn’t really appreciate me as a person or marco’s friend even, they just looked at me as this toy that comes to their door and plays with him. The golden example of his grandmothers uncanny behaviour is when she would come into the room bring a whole bag of chips for us, and say to me; "Could you let Marco sit on that chair, that one is more comfortable for him" The chair I was sitting on was a black fake leather office chair with armbands that were padded with some kind of soft material which was really satisfying to touch.I didn’t understand why I had to get up for Marco to sit, if he wanted to sit he would ask me to sit there, or just take the damn chair like all kids do. I immediately said “OK no problem”, but as i was standing up, Marco said, "Granny please get out of my room" and she said "But he is already standing up, go sit down" and then he would start  screaming at her and when the screams got really loud she would say "Ok ok I'm leaving, I'm leaving" as she exits the room. Such events would happen very often, I mean, those two had a really wierd dynamic. I suppouse it was always like that. I mean it is weird, nobody wants to be in my place hearing all that. -That is private made public right here on this blog, Extra! Extra! Read all about it!- Grandmother, Bianca took him in when he was little and he had problems with breathing, he had a bunch of problems, and has them still. His teeth are crooked and black, his nose is slimey and goo comes out of it all the time. He is a very heavy breather, he makes wierd noises with his mouth and never closes it fully because he needs it to breathe, he only likes one kind of bread and which is like a white baguette that you need to bake in the oven. He doesn't eat any other type of bread, serriously. He is very closed to the outter world, i mean, everything he still does is play video games. I can't say if his grandmother spoiled him, or that he is retarded or even autistic, because i don't hang out with him anymore and ruining the fun we had and talking about him badly would be a shame honestly. We used to be close. You can’t really talk badly about him, nobody talked badly. That was one of the prime rules in our class. You could pick on any of the kids, start fights, hit them with pieces of chalk or even throw a rock at them but dont pull that shit on Marco. We would hang out and play video games and do kids stuff, he had a playstation two, which for todays standards is garbage. I don't play video games nowdays, cause i'm fairly busy and i can't afford it anyways. My parents never let me do that, because I had “epilepsy” which is another wierd story for another time. Marco was a good human,call him autistic,but he was good in his heart. I would bet anybody a million dollars that he never had a bad thought in his head. He was just there, existing, in this tiny microspace his grandmother constructed to be is eternal playground. It is pretty sad when i look back on it now. Once i went to his profile page on facebook which we created for him together and saw the same face expression he had when he was a kid( he didn’t change his profile picture) the one with the open mouth hanging. Maybe if it wasn’t for his obnoxious grandmother i would’t stop hanging out with him, who knows. not because of him but because of his grandmother who was bossing you arround where and how to sit all the time. And I don't blame her for ruining Marco, i mean who is to blame, he wouldn't have a home if she didn't take him in, and Marco had his own conciousness, he could try to go outside more and meet new people and be a lad, but he didn't feel up to the task, so he picked the cozy office chair and a Play Station 2, or it was picked out for him. I don’t know There is no one to blame in the end. It is just how it is.

In the dream I was sitting in a room with Marco. He was talking about how he is training hard to win this match in the arena tomorrow, which is completely the opposite of the real life Marco i hung out with. This Marco was so pumped to win, he talked about all of his moves, everything, his strategy, his game plan, how he managed to get ready in such a short time(i don't remember how it was really a long time ago that dream) and I fought opponents too, I think. In the previous battles when the opponent was down you had to finish him, exactly like the gladiator. The fighting stage looked a lot like the Roman Colloseum but at night and there were huge lights shining with blinding intensity. Maybe at this time i was acknowledging death, so that acknowledgement crossed over to my dreams, i'm not sure. The next day Marco was battling me in the arena, and he didn't hold back. He didn't hold back at all. We didn’t even shake hands at the beginning of the fight. It was like this thing that I felt superior next to got injected with some kind of advanced strength serum and it backfired making him an evil monster, destroying everything in his path. I felt betrayed cause I was begging him to stop and i didn't. I was fighting back ofcourse but for some reason he had this immense power and I couldn’t land one hit. I became afraid of him, and my hands were missing strength. In the end, I didn't want to hit him because i knew that this wasn't Marco that was hitting me. In other words, i was trying to summon Marco back, I was trying to make him realise that this was wrong. It was like this bond between us was being broken and I was the one trying to hold it all together.  At the same time i was realising that he was going to kill me and that he had no intention of holding back. Pure pain took over my heart as I saw that. I respected him, I knew how good of a person he was, but in that dream, knowing how much more pain that metamorphosis caused me, i felt truely betrayed and in a sense I was shattered. 

In the final moments when I woke up Marco's horn pierced my abdomen and swung me across the air. There was a green goo from Marco's eyelids and horns. It seemed like i was infected with this madness that changed him. I woke up feeling sick, and I screamed in pain. My parents came into the room and they comforted me, asked me if i need to vomit. I tried that but nothing came out. It just hurt badly.  The next day I didn't go to Marcos, i stayed home. I didn't feel good. I was having slight nausea all day and couldn't eat anything during this period. Me and Marco took different paths that day. After a while i couldn't look at marco with the same interest as before. I felt disgust. I didn't feel like talking to him, at all. Nothing he said was interesting to me, whenever he tried to make a joke i was feeling slightly sorry for him so i laughed a fake laugh and added something onto his joke while looking far from his eyes as possible. It was obvious we won’t hang out anymore. One day I went out with some other kids and we never talked again. I eventually made new friends and moved on. Marco stayed the same forever.

I guess why this dream has a meaning to me is that it was my first morally conciouss dream. Even though it was one of the strangest most alien experiences in my life and words are futile to describe it. It transnformed me through a very wierd metaphysical bodily experience into an unpure child, running the streets with the other unpure children. I got the twist I needed. 

[champagnespankzandbacon]

Sunday evening, and it seemed like a good idea…after at glass of rose’.  “I’m going on a cleanse!”…I bellowed to my husband. He has been on a ‘eating healthier and working out more’ routine. He randomly drops to the floor and does sets of 40 push ups. He has also been knocking out more reading; which is NOT my thing. And he listens to a lot of Podcasts…which I do enjoy. But one of the books/podcasts he told me about was “Fit for Life”, in which the dude eats ONLY fruit until noon every day and has for 20 years! Twenty. Twenty years. If some dude can do it for twenty years, surely I can do it for a week!? Right? So, Monday morning…off to the grocery we went (before I changed my mind) and bought ALL of the veggies and fruits we could agree on, and some we didn’t…and coconut milk, coconut water, coconut blend. Here we GO! This blog will be a daily recap & proof of me not killing anyone due to lack of intake of pasta and champagne…. #pray #alliby

See…random push up sessions. Moe is NOT impressed.

Monday 4pm. Well,  I kind of want a huge bowl of pasta and bacon right now. Really, it’s not too bad. Breakfast; I had a smoothie. Got the banana, strawberries and mango out and I was ready to go. Now, I have never cut a mango. And apparently there is a method and I didn’t do it right…so the little punk ended up butchered and in the trash. Fail #1. But I sure did enjoy my banana, strawberry and orange smoothie! Lunch was a tomato and avocado salad….if I closed my eyes, I almost fooled myself to think it was cake. #AtLeastIdidntCutMyself #damnMango #EveryoneISstillAlive

yes, I know this is a bit obsence. I have to entertain myself…

Tuesday Morning.  I’m not “I need to eat a snickers hungry”…but I sure would like some bacon. Instead, I took my frustration out on a watermelon. I was not happy finding out that it was not seedless. But I guess that means it has not been genetically modified? Hell, I don’t know. I do know that it took me twice as long to cut it up and clear all the seeds out before storing it….that was fun. I better feel like Superwoman at the end of this week.

Tuesday Lunch. I just ate enough watermelon to sustain a small vegan army….or at least to make me pee every 20 minutes for the next several hours. Sidebar; I really need to wash my hair, but I am not mentally prepared to blow dry it. #ugh

Tuesday night. I broke. A soon as the hubby got home from work…”Open the liquor cabinet”. You see, we have it locked because we have two boys, and we aren’t stupid. But, I didn’t fall tooooo far off the ‘raw wagon’. In fact, it wasn’t even off the seat of the wagon! It was a 1/2 a shot of Tito’s (Gluten, fat, carb & sugar free), sparkling water and watermelon…and I do have to say it was quite tasty. Dinner wasn’t to yummy, I am not going to lie. I can’t even type it out…the poor hubby ate it with me. #blessHim

Gluten Free, Organic 🙂 and VERY refreshing!

Wednesday Morning….we are on the road to NOLA. (business dinner) But, I mean really? I have to do this in the BEST place to eat in the country? shit. But, no worries…this OCD chick already looked at the menu online and I know exactly what I’m going to order for dinner. Lunch consisted of sashimi & mineral water with lime at Tsunami’s…I can’t complain about that!!! And I got a compliment on my outfit as SOON as I walked in the door. That will put some wind in your ‘raw’ sails! #yaaasQueen

I am realizing that it is VERY hard to come to NOLA and be at our favorite hotel, even thought this trip is for business for the hubs, and NOT drink and eat my heart out. This is the ultimate test. I mean, that is what you do…when in Rome.  At the current moment, I am trying to convince the hubs to stop working for 15 min and come downstairs with me to the Carousel Bar, sit in our favorite spot and people watch with me. #hesNotMoving #WorkWork #MayhaveToshowSomeCleveage #Kidding!

The hubs is on call after call for work… So I go downstairs to get inspired. Notice my ROAR organic drink in the corner of the pic? OMG…SO good! He is NOT moving from this spot anytime soon….he loves his job, thank goodness! #lovethatman

Now I’m sitting in a window seat…writing, watching. I LOVE people watching. And in NOLA there is a never-ending stream of entertainment. Locals, NOLA regulars, tourists, street performers, suits…and it was about 3ish and this is the time where the ‘day shift’ is heading out of the French Quarter and the ‘night shift’ is heading in. Oh…and of course, a bachelorette party. Complete with open toed high heels and headed straight for the street slime of Bourbon Street! Hep C here we come! Kidding…but for realz. Bless their little 24 yr old hearts. #NightTime #OnlyPediCab #orUberforMe #ILOVENolaButIDontlikeSlimeOnMyShoes

Thursday…I wake to the hubby typing away, getting ready for an early business breakfast. He hears me stirring and offers me a “hot tea”. HOT TEA? “I would like a coffee, please put me a k-cup to brew.” I am a coffee drinker. Even with this raw diet thing, coffee is a NON negotiable. First I drink the coffee then I do the things….and I am NOT very pleasant before coffee. The hubs looks at me with this cute grin and says “I drank both of the coffee cups…you can run one of the pods again…?.” (my eyes are about to pop out of my head).  “No” I say in disgust, disappointment, “I will order room service and it will be here in 2 hours…”  Good thing Monteleone room service has always been quick and within 20 min I had my coffee and fruit tray. Praise the coffee gods! In the hubs defense, he did offer to shower and go downstairs and get me a cup of coffee. But, in my coffee-less decision-making, I opted for room service. #ItwasAGoodChoice

Friday. Still eating fruit.

Saturday morning, I went to a local organic farmers market, Inglewood Farms, and stocked up on veggies, some chicken, eggs, even bacon! I picked up what I thought was squash & zucchini …turns out it was cucumbers. #fail #IDidntKnowThereWereYellowCucumbers? #farmersMarketGoober #IdespiseCucumbers

For lunch, we went to our usual Saturday lunch spot. Spirits food & friends in Alexandria, LA. It is a SUPER yummy restaurant and locally owned. If you are ever in Alex, stop in and eat/drink there. Really cool outdoor patio, pet friendly…if your dog is cool, LOL. Now, it is VERY hard to go here and not just chow down. But I was very good, had the Tuna Poke. Great as usual and I had only one champs cocktail, not as usual. I mean, I have been good for 6 days! My body is sooooo used to champs almost everyday. It was so good, not going to lie.

Sunday. Trip to Monroe for Fathers Day church and lunch for the hubs grandfather who is a young 94. Backing it up a few…while we are getting ready, I ask the hubs “Where are we going for lunch?” He tells me…they are just doing something easy and picking up pizza. (Well, that is just great. I am glad I asked! Men….) So, in a rush, I pack up my lunch; fruit, an avocado, etc. in my chilled bag and we get on the road.  It was a lovely day and the hubs even stopped at a grocery before church and I picked up some fresh sushi…all was forgiven. (got rid of most of the rice)

Sunday night. Chicken Cordon Blue-ish was on the menu. Now I call it ‘ish’ because I adapted the recipe…on the fly. I hammered out the pasture raised, organic chicken breasts and stuffed with fresh, organic dino kale, that had been lightly sautéed in non-salted, organic butter and garlic. Then laid down Turkey slices and a small amount of shredded mozz cheese. (the only think that was not organic on this dish was the sliced turkey, mozz cheese and bread crumbs). Rolled each up and secured with toothpics…in the oven for 50 min at 350. In the meantime, I decided to try something I had NEVER done before. Now, I am a night owl, and my nighttime routine, after everyone else gets fed and to bed is a little TV time. I DVR my shows and BRAVO, HGTV and Food Network are the majority of the recordings. I have been on a “The Next Food Network Star” kick and recently they made hollandaise sauce from scratch and topped over a perfectly poached egg. Like old school way, in the pot, with vinegar, stirring and dropping in the egg… I AM ON IT! I can DO THIS! So out comes the organic eggs I just got the day before at the farmers market…and I am ready to make some sauce and poach some eggs!

HOLY MOLY…nothing will show you how OUT of shape you are in your forearms like whisking a hollandaise sauce for 5 minutes straight, then over the water for 15 seconds…then off…then more wisking… then adding components and wisking the whole time. I felt like a beast! Now on the poaching. Im not going to bore you with the details, but lets just say I may have missed my calling! My first three poached eggs were perfection. I placed them on top of the Cordon Blue-ish….and sweet mother of organics, it was heaven on a plate! I wish I would have videoed the moment we cut into the egg. I was really proud of myself! Here is the recipie for Gordon Ramseys Eggs Benedit..it has the poach & sauce directions. I encourage you to YouTube if you have never done it before. I didn’t use tarragon, and added more lemon juice…I like my sauce tangy.

Monday….I made it. One week of eating RAW. I weighed myself and I gained a lb. WHAT the heck? But I FEEL different, I am sleeping better, my clothes fit better. My IBS isn’t toooo much better, but that is a whole different issue. I didn’t do this to loose weight, although I can see it having that effect in the long run. I did this for health, to feel better.

So what did I learn and what will I do from this point on? I learned that I CAN do what I set my mind to do, no matter how difficult it may seem at first. I thought…No Champagne for a week? RAW for a week? WHAT??  It is one day at a time, one meal at a time, one choice at a time.  I will continue with the fruit until noon, occasional splurges, I’m sure. (#brunch) I will READ labels more. We put CRAP in our bodies and in our kids bodies. Stop that shit! I will use organic more…and we used organic a lot, but I can do better for me and my family.  If only there was organic champagne…

You, me, we…WE CAN do what we set our minds and bodies to do. Are you scared to challenge yourself? To try something new? Whatever you are finding yourself up against…just try it. What is the worst that could happen? You could fail, yes. So what! Who freaking cares. You could also totally win and rock it! And friends, it is so worth trying. 

Much Love

KP

My “Raw” Week Sunday evening, and it seemed like a good idea...after at glass of rose'.  "I'm going on a cleanse!"...I bellowed to my husband.