#i argue that he's just as bad as rita when it comes to himself vs everything else

[harukakitous]

Ohsama Sentai King-Ohger | #15 

Your words have pierced my heart. However... there is no need for worry!

[spoondragon]

Sleeping with the Band of Brothers Boys

I couldn’t sleep last night so this happened instead. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ If I missed any of your faves or you just want to add some of your own sleepy Bob headcanons, please feel free to add onto this!

Webgott

Web tosses and turns, changing his position roughly a dozen times before he falls asleep and then a dozen more after he does. (This is the origin of his legendary bedhead.) The only time that he's truly still - beautiful face slack, mouth predictably agape, drooling on the pillow - is after a good, hard, thorough fucking. Joe woks hard to regularly achieve this result. How else is he gonna get any sleep? A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do.

Lieb secretly loves being the little spoon but he will punch you right in the dick if you ever breathe a word about it to anyone. He tells himself it's because he likes the body heat, which is part of it. He's a skinny fucker and he feels the cold worse than anybody else. But more than that, he likes feeling safe and protected, wrapped in Web's buff arms, his soft body fur warm against his back. But again, fist meets dick if you say a fucking word.

Speirton

Speirs steals the covers. All the covers. The sheet, the comforter, the bedspread, the throw blanket that was on the chair in the other room. He flatly denies it of course, even as he peers sleepily out of his blanket burrito. Tired of waking up shivering, Lip starts bringing his own covers, but of course in the morning those have been absorbed into the blanket burrito too. With a long-suffering sigh, he tells Ron that he might have to start sleeping on the couch or just not sleeping over at all. The next morning Lip wakes up covered in sweat, wrapped up in Ron and every blanket on the bed. He has been absorbed into the blanket burrito too.

Lip is a deep sleeper. Once he's out, he is OUT. He can sleep through anything. A train. An earthquake. A chainsaw. Ron knows. He's done experiments. The only things that seem to wake Lip are his alarm clock, the sun and Robbie. Somehow his tiny cries have Lip up and moving in an instant. Whether he's truly awake at these times, is debatable however. As the bottle of baby formula in the toaster will attest.

Baberoe

Gene is a light sleeper. His time as a combat medic has conditioned him to wake at the slightest disturbance and he does, often. He will jerk awake at Babe's sudden snore or the radiator clicking on and then that’s it. He's awake. Sometimes Babe is startled to see Gene already sitting up in bed, pale and wide eyed, still but vigilant, a thrum of taught energy coiled inside him like a compressed spring. "You're like a damn owl. Jesus!" Babe will mutter, hand on his heart. Gene just smiles sheepishly at him. Babe will then pull Gene down beside him, until his head is on his chest and he’ll tell him all about the crazy dream he just had while stroking Gene's dark, silky hair.

Babe has vivid, bizarre dreams. Sometimes they're bad dreams (Julian reaching for him in the snow as a pack of mutant zombie wolves devour him alive). Sometimes they're good dreams (walking down an aisle made of springy pink Jell-O to a smiling, glowing? Cajun doctor as his family and friends smile and cheer around them). Sometimes they're just... weird (having a heated discussion with Abe Lincoln about snickerdoodles vs gingersnaps while dressed in lady's lingerie). He really never knows what it's going to be. Gene keeps telling him that he should keep a dream journal but Babe doesn't really see the point. He doesn't have any trouble remembering them and Gene’s the only person he wants to tell about them anyway.

Winnix

Dick sleeps in full-on grandpa pajamas, complete with socks in the winter, which Nix finds abhorrent. He doesn't understand how that much fabric can possibly be comfortable to sleep in. He'd rather add three more blankets to the bed than put on one stitch of clothing. Plus, the fact that Dick is denying him access to his glorious naked body is just rude. ("Nix we're just going to be sleeping, what does it matter?" he argues. "Well if you're wearing 12 layers of clothes that's certainly all we're gonna be doing!") However, Nix soon discovers that if he wears Dick out completely with athletic sex, Dick is too exhausted to get dressed for bed, just collapsing in a naked, sweaty heap like God intended. Eventually, Dick is broken of his pajama habit. The socks, unfortunately, are still a thing.

Nix is a night owl and doesn't so much fall asleep as pass out, usually not before 2 am. It's not that he doesn't get sleepy. Dick will see his eyes getting heavy and suggest maybe he come to bed, only for Nix to argue that he's not tired like a petulant child avoiding nap time. Dick goes to bed early but finds it difficult to fall asleep alone in the big, cold bed. Eventually, he tells Nix that he doesn't care how late he stays up so long as he does it in bed next to him. Nix agrees, as he usually does to suggestions involving Dick and a bed. And sometimes, the sound of Dick's steady breathing lulls Nix to sleep as early as midnight.

Luztoye

Luz talks and even laughs in his sleep. The first time it happened, Joe thought he was fucking with him, making some kind of joke about purple detergent that he wouldn't explain. It irritated Joe to no end and he had trouble falling asleep. He was moody and gruff the next morning (even more so than normal for a Tuesday) to Luz's utter mystification. The next time it happened, Joe got so irritated that he turned on the light to confront Luz, only to find him obviously deeply asleep. Joe then starts writing down all the absurd shit that Luz says in his sleep ("Colonel Sink doesn't even LIKE petunias... Only if you pleeeease Mr. Beauregard... Fourteen yellow spinks.") and starts telling Luz about it in the morning. It becomes kind of fun after that, even though Joe still pretends he thinks it's weird and annoying. However, that attitude changes the night he overhears Luz telling Rita Hayworth about all the different ways Joe is amazing.

Joe likes to cuddle. He fucking hates that word but he guesses it's true. Touching is definitely better than talking. It's a lot less complicated. So, when no one else is around, like in bed, he likes to touch. It helps him express things he has trouble saying otherwise. Luz has never fallen asleep without Joe touching him somewhere – a hand resting on his bicep, a leg tangled with his, an arm slung around his waist. Sometimes Luz will fall asleep as Joe traces idle patterns on the skin of his back. That might be the best. Or maybe it's when he plays with his hair...

Bull/Martin (Bulltin?)

Bull snores – loudly. Like, really loud. Buzz saw loud. Jet engine loud. Can-still-be-heard-under-three-pillows loud. At first Johnny hates it and shakes Bull awake the moment it starts, giving him the patented Johnny Martin Don't Make Me Kill You with My Bare Hands look. But after a while the sound becomes an insanely loud kind of white noise that Johnny finds he can't sleep without.

Johnny has been dubbed Sargeant Starfish by the only person on Earth brave enough to do so. Bull is constantly amazed that such a small person can take up such an insane amount of space in a bed. He's not even surprised when he wakes up curled into a (not so) tiny ball at the foot of the bed like a dog. Johnny's been taking up all the space in his world for a while now. Why should it be any different in his bed?

Bonus

Buck sleeps with a teddy bear inexplicably named Mr. Jingles. He doesn't even think it's weird. Which is the weirdest part.

Malarkey sleep walks. And sometimes sleep bakes. He scared the crap out of Muck and Penkala the first time that happened. He wandered into the kitchen and started trying to bake a fully frozen ham still wrapped in plastic. The smoke alarm woke them up thank God, but they put a special lock on his door after that.

Skinny can and will sleep anywhere. In class. On public transportation. In waiting rooms. During car rides longer than 10 minutes (even if he's driving). He doesn't know why. He gets plenty of sleep at night. His brain just seems to see any idle moment as an opportunity to catch more z's.

Perconte wears a mouth guard to sleep because he grinds his teeth at night. His diligent oral hygiene is a result of all the time he spent at the orthodontist as a kid.

Shifty can lucid dream. He didn’t even know that’s what you called it, but there you go. When he was a boy he kept having the same nightmare over and over about a huge black panther chasing him. He came to be real sick of it. So he decided to shoot the thing. Every night before he fall asleep he’d concentrate real hard on what he wanted to happen. At first he’d have his rifle in the dream but it wouldn’t fire. Then after a while it would fire but he’d miss. Finally, after several weeks, he shot the panther right between the eyes. Only, as it fell to the ground it turned into a black sock. After that, he could pretty much decide what he wanted to dream about.