#i apologise for being a fag

[obsessive-jan]

Fernando's Brazilian gp crash 2003

[samsm2mstories]

Halloween story /new series: The beginnings of Fredrick

Previous introductions of each character: Fredrick: Fredrick's Introduction, click here! Duncan: Duncan's introduction, click here! Oscar: Oscar's introduction, click here! Alex: Alex's introduction, click here!

Start of story: 5pm: Fredrick was starting his shift at the petrol station; out of all the nights, he hoped not to see anyone. Every year, this day reminds him of his legacy and the legacy that his father left him behind. He cleared up some of the shelves and rotated products until a loud BMW pulled out outside. He went back behind the till to see if the car driver needed to use the petrol pump. He could see some young lads in the car laughing away as they all got out. 5.05pm:

Duncan stepped outside his BMW, laughing at Oscar, who said something about his attitude towards people. You can see there's tension in the air as Oscar tells him to fuck off and walks towards the till. You could see that Oscar was actually quite pissed and upset at the same time as he and Alex walked into the petrol station with a happy Fredrick smiling at them. Fredrick: Evening, lads. It was a wonderful evening up here in the Moors. Do you guys need petrol? Alex: Yeah, mate, make sure our idiotic friend outside doesn't put any more than £30 into the tank, as he will take the piss.

Fredrick: No problem, sir. Are you guys up here for the nearby camping site? *Fredrick eyeing up both lads*

Alex: Erm, yeah, we are finally on our camping trip, which we have been planning for months. Oscar walks towards Alex, who's talking to Fredrick; you can see some attraction between them. *Alex walks towards the car, leaving the cash with Oscar at the till. Oscar: Can you please add these to the petrol bill? *looking shy

Fredrick: No problem, sir *biting his lip, which Oscar notices. That's £46.99 altogether?

Oscar: No problem, here's the cash! *smirking and blushing. Fredrick: Thank you, sir. Can I ask for your number? Oscar blushes deeply and nods as Fredrick hands his phone over and locks eyes. Duncan suddenly walks in and overhears Fredrick asking if Oscar has ever been with a guy... Duncan: WHAT IS THIS I'M HEARING A FUCKING FAGGOT CHATTING UP MY BEST MATE!! Oscar and Fredrick look at Duncan as he points at Fredrick and demands that he repeat what he just heard. Fredrick repeated what he said while he put his phone away. As he did, Duncan threw his fist at Fredrick, who fell backwards on his chair into the booze shelf, which caused some to fall and smash. Fredrick: WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR!! ARE YOU ONE OF THOSE FUCKING HOMPHOBICS WHO ARE INSECURE ABOUT OTHERS BEING A FAG??? Duncan: YOU SAY WHAT YOU FUCKING PUSSY, COME ON FIGHT ME IF YOU ARE A REAL FUCKING MAN! Fredrick: OHHH, DON'T YOU WORRY? YOU ARE FUCKING BANNED FROM THIS STATION, AND DON'T WORRY. YOU WILL FUCKING LEARN A LESSON SOON. As Duncan left the store, Alex ran in to see what happened. He and Oscar spoke and they both went towards Fredrick? Oscar, Alex: Are you okay? Can we pay for the damages? Oscar offered Fredrick his packet of tissues, which when Fredrick took. He stroked Oscar's hand to reassure him that their earlier talk was still on. Duncan: HURRY THE FUCK OUT OF THAT FAGGORTY PLACE! Oscar once again apologised to Fredrick, and you can sense something beautiful flicking between them. Oscar left the store with Alex, whispering about how to deal with this situation later. They both got into Duncan's car. Oscar: Was that fucking needed on our trip? You might be lucky not to get arrested, Duncan! What the fuck is wrong with you! Duncan: I don't give a fucking toss, mate, faggots like him should be locked up and destroyed. Are you seriously sticking up for a cunt like him? Oscar: Maybe you can't just go and start fucking throwing punches at people when you feel like it. It's fucking wrong, but seriously, you need to calm the fuck down. Alex: Duncan Oscar is actually correct; you should keep those sorts of thoughts to yourself; it's not fucking right what you did there tonight

Duncan: Who gives a shit? Let's just forget about this!

As you can tell in the car, Oscar and Alex are fuming about the situation at the petrol station. Oscar was totally mortified at how Duncan just reacted to finding someone gay. This made him think about his options as he hoped Duncan would accept him for who he was. He decided to confront him. Oscar: What if I asked for that guy's number, and I am a gay prick? Duncan: Stop fucking messing around, bro; you aren't a fag now; I know you all these years!

Oscar: How do you know I'm fucking about Duncan? Maybe I am fucking gay, so what are you going to do about it! Duncan: Shut the fuck up, Oscar; you seriously going to get knocked out if you carry on with that shit talk! Alex nudges Oscar to indicate it's not worth continuing the conversation. He looked at Oscar and smiled. He had a hunch that Oscar was gay, considering the way he saw how Fredrick and Oscar were locking eyes. 6.20pm: The group arrives at the campsite. Alex goes outside to open the gate, and Duncan revs his car as he drives onto the site. A few minutes later, Duncan said he needed to take a shit and would be back in 30 mins. Alex and Oscar got the tents up and a campfire started. Alex: Oscar, if you are gay, I'm actually proud of you. Duncan was fucking wrong about how he treated that guy. Besides, anyone is lucky to have a sexy cunt like you! Oscar: Thanks, mate, I meant to tell Duncan, but the way he acted actually makes me think he's a waste of space. Can we keep it between us? You can tell Alex is jealous of Oscar because of his handsome looks. He wishes he had that sort of body and face sometimes. Alex: I always have your back, Os. Don't worry about Duncan; your secret is safe with me. But did you like that petrol guy?

Oscar: Yeah, he was really cute. He seems like a lovely person, and how lucky he is to have such amazing countryside. They both chatted away while cooking some steaks over the campfire while Duncan was still in the toilet taking a long shit, as he would say. 7pm: Duncan sat next to Alex and started making jokes about his strength and how he could do whatever he wanted. You could feel that Oscar wanted to punch his face, but Duncan would easily overpower him.

All three had a few beers and started chatting nonsense about their lives and how cool it was back in school. 11pm: They all agreed to get some sleep, but Alex saw something lurking in the trees, thinking nothing of it. 12pm: 1-2-3 Fredrick coming to get your body Fredrick knew precisely where the lads were. As he headed over to the campsite facility room, he wanted to teach that muscle cunt a lesson. Fredrick knew there would be no turning back if he went ahead now. He locked himself in the facility room that contained images of drawings he did about his father and somehow acquired a relic from him. Fredrick wanted Oscar and was about to get him 1-2-3 Fredrick is coming to get your body. 5-6-7

Fredrick lay down on the cold wooden flooring and entered a trance.

12.30pm: Oscar was a deep sleeper. He dreamed about Fredrick at the petrol station and wished things were different. You could sense how he wanted to be like Duncan and stop someone like him from hurting others. Fredrick stepped into the dream and became behind the till before the situation with Duncan. Fredrick: Imagine if you were built like that dick, Oscar! Oscar: Tell me about it, I would do anything to have a body like his. Fredrick: Tell me about it; you would be fucking amazing even though you are fucking sexy now! Oscar: You are fucking hot, Mr FREDRICK! *leans over and kisses Fredrick. If things can change, you are always my type of guy! You know, Alex is kinda cute also, so it's so hard to have friends that are hot straight. Fredrick: What would you do if you were to control Duncan Oscar? Oscar: I would go back to the petrol station and fucking destroy that ass of yours as an apology and let you admire the muscles! Fredrick: Just wait, Oscar, you are mine either way! As the dream faded away, Fredrick had a plan. He hadn't done it before, but he knew he could do it. He lured Oscar's sleeping soul into a small stone found in his father's realm. Fredrick then walked into Duncan's dream. Duncan was dreaming about a certain girl who was fucking him in the bedroom. After their long fuck, she went into the toilet, dripping from her pussy. Instead of the girl, Fredrick walked out and looked at Duncan directly. Duncan: WHAT THE FUCK, WHERE IS MY BITCH YOU FAG! Fredrick: Your girl, you dream of fucking a girl in your dream; what a fucking retard you are. Duncan: What the fuck is this, why are you even here? What the fuck is my mind playing at! Fucking get loss, you cunt.

Fredrick: Ohhhh Duncan, you are going to fucking suffer. The way you treated me, then Oscar came out, and you dismissed him. You are a true fucking loser that doesn't deserve to be in this world any longer.! He grabbed Duncan, which happens to be his soul, and the whole dream world changed into a burnt-out world of his father's dormant realm.

Duncan suddenly appeared trapped inside a giant stone, smashing it and trying to get out.

Duncan: WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING, THIS CAN'T BE FUCKING REAL SURELY!!! FUCKING GET OUT OF MY HEAD YOU CUNT!!!!

Fredrick: OOOH, THE FUCKING STRAIGHT HOMOPHOBIC FINALLY MET HIS MATCH; GUESS WHAT! YOU GOING TO FUCKING REALISE THAT YOU MESSED WITH THE WRONG FUCKING FAG TONIGHT! Duncan was screaming for help, but nothing was nearby; there were just burnt-out lands and trees and absolutely nothing. Fredrick was laughing away as he disappeared. Just before he leaves Duncan's dream, he grabs the soul stone and opens it up and pulls Oscar onto the bed where Duncan was fucking his girl. Fredrick kissed Oscar on the head, knowing he would wake up feeling like a king the following day. Fredrick faded away and entered Alex's Dream. Alex was dreaming about being a stud like Oscar and Duncan. He was in the gym, flexing away and taking selfies while checking his muscles. He saw Fredrick walking into the changing rooms, sweating like he had a workout. Fredrick: Looking fucking big there, Alex!

Alex: Thanks, mate; why am I seeing you in my dream? Is this some sort of message that I've done something wrong? Fredrick: Don't worry, you will be confused either way! I just wanted to say thank you for the support you gave to Oscar tonight! In fact, you will feel the difference soon! Alex: Is this real? Is this some sort of haunting!!! *looks worried. Fredrick: When you realise the changes, please be supportive no matter what! Alex: WHattttt do you mean!!!!! Fredrick suddenly uses the soul stone to suck Alex into it. You could hear Alex screaming to the point he ran into the stone edge and knocked himself out. It saved Fredrick a lot of time as he left Alex's dream world and entered Oscars, which was still at the petrol station. He released the knocked-out Alex. Fredrick finally puts his plan to rest as he enters Alex's dream world and smacks himself in the mirror Alex is posing in. 6am: Alex woke up feeling fucking amazing from that dream; he couldn't help but to check his morning wood out. It was a good 18cm thick. He started stroking himself to edge himself before leaving the ten to stretch himself out. He went to take the piss and couldn't stop checking out his muscles like he did in the dream. While Alex was in the toilet taking a piss.... Duncan woke up feeling really froggy. He felt something was off and looked in shock at his thick hands and biceps. He took the sleeping bag off and saw he was muscular all over. He was touching himself all over as he swear he was in a dream. Duncan started jerking off, and the amount of cum that came out of his cock was intense. Duncan laughed away, thinking this was a wet dream, until he stepped outside. Oscar was just waking up feeling really odd. He felt strands of hair that weren't meant to be there. He panicked silently as he was checking his body out. He realised that his dream was absolute and now in the body of his friend Oscar. He couldn't resist checking his bulge out as he rubbed a quick one-off. He was laughing away that he was somehow Oscar now! He stepped outside to see Duncan and Alex looking at each other. They all looked at each other and started asking who was who. Alex got close to Duncan and stroked his hand like they did at the petrol station. Duncan suddenly realised what had happened but kept quiet, unsure who was in who. Oscar laughed and started joking about this being a freaky Friday but said they must accept it as it is. He knew that the guy in his dream kept to his word.

Alex: Should we head back home? *texting the local police about the location of the missing son of a mass murderer was living in the moors. Duncan and Oscar agreed as they packed their tents and entered Duncan's BMW. Duncan knew Alex wasn't Alex but Fredrick as he held his hand on the gear stick. Oscar noticed this and finally put the entire picture together; he chuckled, knowing this would be one hell of a ride. He is about to meet a girl who's been crushing on Oscar, and he can't wait to date her.

As they drove away.... The police and armed police came storming past their car towards the campsite. They surrounded the camp store room to find Fredrick with blood and other parts. Fredrick: I'M TELLING YOU I'M NOT THIS MURDEROUS KILLER, HE STOLE MY FUCKING BODY!

As Fredrick walked towards the police, they tasered him to the ground. Alex: That straight cunt finally got what he deserves. *smirking in the mirror, knowing he finally got the man of his dreams, a new body and start.

He kissed Duncan, knowing this was the start of a new life; he would never die and knew how to preserve his friendships. The trio will live on forever as friends as they show kindness to a guy who never had friends. 1-2-3 Fredrick coming to get your body 5-6-7 Fredrick is ALEX! End of Story! I hope you all enjoyed this story. It's longer, and I know it's not normal for me to write one like this, but this is a unique Halloween story for you all. I might do a follow-up story based on Duncan's and Alex's life a few months later. I can assure you that they know about the situation, and all agreed this was the greater good. They did visit Fredrick in prison just to taunt him and kiss in front of him. Let's say Fredrick went back, and they locked him in solidarity for the abuse. HAPPY HALLOWEEN FROM YOUR FAVORITE STORY WRITER!

SAMMY xxxx

[strangelittlestories]

[cw: briefly appearance of a homophobic characer who uses a slur]

He looked like sunlight.

I'd never seen hair that colour before, that bright mix of platinum and and sunflower. I'd had a few beers by that point, and when I saw him across the dance floor I thought he was on fire.

The bar wasn't anything special. It was grimy, like I liked it, the dance floor had less room to move than some prison cells I'd been in (and considerably more sticky). I figured I'd have a drink, have a dance, have a fight, then have *another* drink from one of these drab buggers.

But there he was, lighting up the night. And I swear I'd never known the meaning of the word effulgent until I saw him.

“Mate, your hair, it’s…” I was slurring,

“It’s great, isn’t it? It’s called Platinum Blonde. Like the movie?”

“The Jean Harlow film?” I’d actually seen that flick back in the ‘30s. It made me have hitherto unexplored feelings about blondes. “She was biteable…”

“I know, right?” He nods at me and smiles and I want him doing that forever.

“Bloody right.”

“You’ve got a cute accent…”

When we left the bar, we didn’t just go to some convenient alley where I would drain him dry and move on. No, tonight was special. And maybe it was the cheap whiskey or maybe pollution or maybe it was him, but the night air shimmered as we passed. The streetlamps flickered wherever we walked, as they knew they could never be as bright as *him*.

We ended up at a late night drug store. He guided me through the brightly coloured packages like he was an alchemist and I was his precious student. I’d never had much time for that mystical shite like some of my type, but this was the kind of neon magic I could get behind.

“This one.” He said, fingers caressing a cardboard package on which a woman with a dazzling smile modelled even more dazzling locks.

“What the bloody hell is Clairol? Is that this bird’s name?”

“Nah, it’s the name of the brand, man. Bringing platinum to the masses.” He had one hand in my hair, tousling the mousy strands and I was incredibly aware of his pulse roaring through his veins. “Spinning straw into gold…”

He was still playing with my hair when we got to the checkout. The clerk gave us a look like he wanted to say something. I was feeling peckish by then, so I just licked my lips at him and pressed myself a bit closer against the living star next to me.

“Fucking fags.” I didn’t really give a bugger, but I saw my star’s face fall. Not much, just enough to make him burn a little less brightly.

Then my hand was around the clerk’s throat and he was choking.

The star didn’t say anything, he just put one firm hand on my arm. Gently. I don’t know why, but I lessened my grip.

“Apologise.” I said it slowly and carefully, drawing out every syllable, letting myself feel the word taut in the air.

He mumbled something that was close enough to sorry to make no odds.

We went back to his place.

I’d never had someone wash my hair before. It was a bit like what being bitten felt like. It felt vulnerable. Transformative.

And after we’d washed the chemicals out, I stood there and I looked in the mirror and … of course, there was no-one looking back at me. But the way *he* looked at me, I bloody well felt like a new man.

His hands were in my hair again. I smiled at him. We fell onto the bed with our hands tangled in each other.

I waited until the sun came up before I did it.

But as the first rays began to creep round the curtains and sting my eyes, I bit hard and drank deep.

And he tasted like sunlight.

[xsommeee]

Chuuya pov at double black reunion after 4 years.

“Where is Akutagawa?” Chuuya asks, looking around.

An eerie silence takes over the jolly group. Their calm smiles falter. An instant sense of worry rushes through his mind. Emo boy shouldn’t be a sour subject unless he’s become a traitor. 

This is a sort of environment where people will blab shit they think he can’t handle, he remembers the same expression on Mori’s grim face while he said Dazai’s benn sighted two years ago and then offered him a ticket to Paris with an incredibly long mission planned. It was a horrible meeting and he left Japan right after.

“S-senpai’s interrogating a member of the armed detective agency.” 

Chuuya blinks, what in the world is the armed detective agency? A detective agency with people walking around with machine guns in their hands? As amusing as that may seem, it’s one of the few organisations with a special ability permit. That much Chuuya remembers from having read. 

A foreboding feeling ensnares him, he can hear the drums of war burst in his ears like in the period Japanese movie he watched a few days ago in the flight, it’s because of that bastard.

“I’ll go see him” Chuuya picks up his hanging coat from the chair, he’ll see him, his legs start moving on their own he could be jumping out of the window. Murderous intent is ebbing out of him and he can feel the power this anger begets.

A gentle hand halts him. He looks at Ane-san, “You” -are playing into his hands? Are being an idiot? Shouldn’t go? Fucking kill him when you see him? Not act reckless?

“Should take your hat and call the driver.” 

His eyebrows furrow, he was being rude and Ane-san just– “I apologise for my bad manners.” He parrots a phrase he learnt to use very often while training under Kouyou when he was a junior.

She just nods her head slightly while placing the hat on his head, mouthing a go. An unsaid don’t come back miserable falls into his ears. He leaves. 

His lips burn with a desire to have a cigarette puckered between them, but he belatedly realises that Hirotsu borrowed his pack and still has it. 

The old fags tryin’ to make him quit smoking for a very long time. A hypocrite given his love for cigars. 

Chuuya’s too hurried, even if he’s trying to not be. So he doesn't ask anyone for a light.

He reaches the port mafia’s maze-like dungeons, skidding here and there to finally see a furious Akutagawa smashing the small iron door shut.

“Chuuya-san?” Akutagawa says when their eyes meet. Blinking as if in disbelief. 

The kid's fist is glaringly red against his pale, almost albinic complexion. Dazai deserves this albeit more. He beat and kicked a helpless orphan into a horrible messed up killing machine. Akutagawa has every right to extract revenge Mafia style. 

Somepart of Chuuya, however enraged and disgusted by the bandaged jerkface, still wants him to be okay -not hurt too gravely per say. It is his competitive side, the one that seeks a fair fight against his lifelong rival. 

“Welcome back home, I was told you would be joining in the evening. What purpose brings you here?”  

Chuuya shrugs, pressing skip on the question. 

“Is Dazai locked up in here?” His finger points towards the door with a slight tremor. The name, he hasn't spoken that name in years.

Akutagawa scowls murmuring a slight hum. 

“How? Why?” Chuuya asks. The fucker’s too meticulous. He’d never do anything unwillingly even while sleeping. 

“We have received a hefty bounty on a weretiger. Dazai got sloppy and got caught in the process.” Akutagawa replied. 

Chuuya’s in a daze, Dazai protecting people? Akutagawa reads his astonished expression. 

“The weretiger is a member of the armed detective agency.”

Right, Dazai is a member of the armed detective agency. 

He doesn't know anything about this agency. He'd been not home for such a long time, avoiding it at times when he could visit back. A foreigner to all soil on Earth. An Earth that crumbles under him, pulls on his command but doesn't accept him. 

“Give me a quick debrief.” He orders his subordinate. 

Long agonising minutes later he’s lowering his head to stand trot down the narrow fleet of stairs. 

He looks up to see Dazai chained to a wall in this dimly lit basement. 

Dazai's changed. He’s wearing a beige coat and a bolo tie and he is missing a patch of bandages that used to hide a part of his face. 

It's the first time he's looking at both of Dazai’s eyes, captivating him with the brightness they hold.

“You being chained here is like a painting worth a million dollars.”

It's not that much, they aren't that bright at all, in fact they are dim but they aren't hollow like they used to be on most days. 

He'd seen only one eye gleam at him with brightness and it was only at the moment Dazai had joked or lied to him. 

He feels his throat constrict, irritates at how shaken his resolve of killing Dazai has become already. 

Dazai curses under his breath, an overly dramatic horrified expression plastered on his face. 

“Still as short as ever I see and hiding a bald patch under this hideous hat are we 

Chuuya~”

Yeah he's regained the sentiment, this is it Chuuya Nakahara would grant a suicidal maniac his life’s wish today. Strangulation would be the attributed reason in the post mortem report. 

“And you are still obsessed with suicide. It will make the happiest man on earth to strangle you.” 

“Yes but you see Chuuya my goal has changed, I now seek a beautiful women to commit double suicide with.”

He clicks his knuckles. There's a lot of things he needs to ask. He’s just waiting till he gets those answers. 

“You can fool Akutagawa but you can not fool me. I was your partner after all.” The word partner leaves a bitter aftertaste on his tongue and he instantly feels the urge to smoke rise. He grits his teeth with an attempt to quash it. 

[player1064]

back again with more carraville brain rot 😃 already out and very whipped carraville dealing with open homophobia from their own fans for the first time since coming out knowing it would happen eventually but not being as prepared as they’d thought they were, whether it’s just one or both of them up to you, lots of comfort of course and defense from either people at sky/class of 92 and extended mates etc. :)))))

had a hard time trying to work out the Vibe for this one bc like tbh I can't imagine fans being that bad like surely SURELY in 2024 they've moved on from the classic football homophobia... but then I remembered that people LOVE to hate Gary so of course they would. And Gary doesn't care about people hating him but Jamie is fussy and protective so he's getting all angry on Gary's behalf meanwhile he's out too and everyone is still lovely to him kdsgfjhkdsds.....

---

Gary’s not exactly a stranger to getting abuse from the stands. It sort of comes with the job – his name has always been and will continue to be attached to his club, and for every football fan he meets that supports United he’s going to meet another five who hate his guts.

Besides, he was at one point the proud holder of the title ‘most hated footballer in England’. Any cruel chants people can come up with, he’s probably heard it before.

So the first time it happens, he doesn’t even notice.

He’s pitch-side for Monday Night Football, chatting about the upcoming game, when he sees a producer behind the camera shoot a worried look towards the stands before giving him the ‘cut’ gesture.

He’d thought he still had a couple of minutes, was only just getting into the swing of it, but he’s a professional so he winds it up quickly and lets them cut back to studio.

Once the light’s off on the camera, he takes his earpiece out and asks “what was’at about?”

The producer just stares at him for a second, astounded. She blinks, then says “the audio – the mics keep picking up noise from the stands, and obviously – we can’t air that sort of thing.”

With a while to go before kick-off, the stands are still only half-full, and for the first time all evening Gary takes a moment to actually listen to what the home supporters are chanting.

He’s not sure what he’s expecting, maybe to be called a cunt (which he’s always rather enjoyed), but this –

He turns to the producer but she’s on the phone, speaking in harsh whispers. After a minute or two, she strides over to Gary and holds the phone out, scowling.

“Carragher’s threatening to walk off set,” she tells him. “You try talk some sense into him.”

Gary takes the phone, walks a few steps away from the camera set-up and says “Carra, you muppet, what’s this I hear about you walking out mid-show?”

“Someone ‘as to do somethin’,” Jamie says, “Show the fans it’s not okay to –”

“Christ alive, ‘s hardly the first time in my life I’ve been called a fag, now, is it?” Gary says with a strained chuckle, though when he tries to think back he’s not entirely sure that’s true. Still, first time for everything. “An’ what’s you havin’ a hissy fit gonna achieve? It’s Leeds, Jamie, you know they like to try rile me up ‘ere. And you’re a five hour drive away, what exactly d’you think you can do right now, idiot?”

He hears Jamie’s breathing start to slow down. “’s not right, though.”

“Eh, maybe not. But I’ve had worse, and Sky’s not payin’ you a million a year to yell at rowdy fans, are they? So go park yer bum, apologise to David for your tantrum, and get on wit’ show. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”

He hangs up, and hands the phone back to the producer with a nod.

“We’re good?” she asks, eyeing him carefully.

“We’re good.” There’s a dull ache starting to build at his temples. This, too, he’s pretty good at ignoring. He smiles. “About time to head up to commentary box, in’t it?”

*

Jamie wants to talk about it on the podcast the next day. Gary tells him to stop being so dramatic.

*

Except, turns out it wasn’t a one-time thing.

It’s funny, the fans mostly leave Jamie alone. It’s Gary they seem to have a problem with, like he, personally, is everything wrong with the world of football. It comes from both sides, too, the small minority who hate him for being gay and the so-called allies who criticise him for daring to come out when he should have known that it’d only aggravate the existing problems in football culture.

Again, Jamie gets none of this. Gary suspects this is because Liverpool is leading the league while United are still stuck mid-table.

He goes out to a pub with his friends one Saturday after Salford’s lost their latest fixture, and he leaves with a black eye.

That’s new.

*

“Put all the make-up on it you want,” Jamie complains while they’re getting set up for the next Stick to Football, “don’t hide the fact that yer eye looks half the size it’s meant to be.”

It’s really not that bad. Gary ignores him and lets the make-up lady continue to work her magic.

“Thoughtful of them to hit the side that’s faced away from camera, wouldn’t you say? ‘sides, it’s not even that bad.” He looks across the table and shrugs. “Is it, Roy?”

Roy’s glare is all the reply he needs.

“This doesn’t feel right, Gal,” says Wrighty, reaching out to touch Gary’s hand. “Are you sure you don’t want to – we’ve got a good audience, here, maybe talking about it would help.”

“This one weren’t even about the gay thing!” he argues. The other four around the table give him disbelieving looks. “It weren’t. It was just post-match frustrations, these things ‘appen.”

“But nobody ever tried to hit you before the fuckin’ gay thing, did they?” Roy says.

Gary sighs, exasperated. “I don’t want it to start a whole conversation, though, do I? Just want things to go back to normal.”

“I, uh,” Jill says, clearing her throat awkwardly. “I don’t think this one’s gonna just ‘go back to normal’, to be fair.”

Well, never let it be said that Gary can’t tell when he’s outnumbered.

“Fine,” he says, raising his hands in surrender. “Fine, we’ll talk about it. But I’m tellin’ you, it won’t change anythin’”

*

“No match commentary, for rest of season. Me as well. Studio only.”

“That’s a nonsense, Jamie, I can try talk them ‘round –”

“It were my idea.”

“James…”

Jamie’s looking at him, face set, stubborn as always. And he’s so stupid, sometimes, so naïve. Ready to go to war over something that Gary’s been treating like nothing more than a minor nuisance.

“You want things to go back to normal?” Jamie argues, voice steady. “Doesn’t get much more normal than me ‘n’ you in studio on a Monday night, does it? It’ll be like old times.”

God, but Gary loves this man.

“Thought they’ve been tryin’ to keep us apart, on screen,” he says lightly, trying for a smirk. His way of telling Jamie fine, you win this one. “Keep us from getting handsy, like.”

Jamie’s face breaks into a grin, his shoulders relaxing. “Speak for yerself, lad, I’m a professional. Think I can keep me hands to meself for an hour or two.”

“Professional my arse,” Gary says, taking a step towards Jamie. “I’d bet you couldn’t last ten minutes.”

Jamie, as if this somehow helps his case, places his hands on Gary’s hips and pulls him closer. Gary, who’s made no such promises of keeping his hands to himself, loops his arms around Jamie’s shoulders and uses one hand to gently bash the back of his head.

Jamie rolls his eyes with a fond smile and leans in to kiss him.

“Uh uh uh,” Gary says, leaning away from him. “Thought you were a professional, like, can’t go kissin’ your co-pundit where anyone might see.”

“You are such a bloody nightmare,” Jamie grumbles, and goes to kiss him again.

This time, Gary lets him.

[thousandfourhundreddays]

van mccann x singer reader pls!

Masterlist

A/n I can only apologise for my severe issue with making promises I can’t keep ahahah. I don’t even know how long ago it was that I said I would write some stuff for Van and so many of you guys’ requests have been neglected in my inbox… BUT I had a couple of Van x singer reader requests so here it is, however I didn’t stick to that completely but I kinda love this so hope you enjoy anyway!!! Also kinda based on Hourglass because I lack all kinds of creativity lol. LOVE YA❤️‍🔥

Waste My Days

“You’re strugglin’” his voice floated down the line, worry seeping into his words. You sighed into the silence of your hotel room, rolling over in bed, eyes flicking across the room to see the time on the clock. 2:36 am.

“I’m ok… it’s just been none stop for so long. I’m exhausted but I just can’t get any rest” Van waited, giving you time to talk, knowing this could be the most insight into your mind he’d been able to get for a long time.

“I love being on tour, I really do. Especially this one, this has been the best yet, I’m just…”

“Exhausted” he finished for you, sensing that you were struggling to find the words.

“You know it”

Boy, did he know it.

-

“How did you sleep?”

“God, I slept so good, the best I’ve slept in weeks Van, I’m telling you”

You heard his chuckle crackle down the line. “Dreaming about me again ay, babe?”

“Always”

-

“Y/n! Your phones ringing!”

Your head shot up, following the sound of the voice that shouted across the floor of the arena. Eyes wide, you sent a look to the sound technician, a silent plea to let you have just one minute. Once you saw him nod, mixed with a slightly annoyed shrug of his shoulders, you jumped down from the stage to find your phone.

“Van?”

“Hiya, darlin’. Was about to give up then, thought you weren’t gonna answer”

“Sorry, soundcheck.” You explained, listening to him drag on a fag in some city far away.

“Aye, me too, just finished. Sorry I interrupted”

“You’re never interrupting” you replied quickly, “I’ve been dying for you to call.”

-

You felt the peel of skin as Van lifted himself off of you, a rush of oxygen filling your lungs as he flopped down next to you into the damp sheets.

One week, one singular week where your tour schedules aligned. Van came to stay at yours, with no other plans than to eat, sleep and in Vans words, “love on you”.

You watched as Van reached over to the bedside table for his cigs, you couldn’t help but reach out to him, your finger tracing the shape of his ribs through his pale skin before you heard a clatter of books fall to the floor in Vans attempt to clear a space for the mug that now doubled as an ash tray.

“Oi, don’t be messing my place up!” You poked at the space between his ribs.

“Oi!” He squeaked in that classic Van McCann squeak, flinching, trying to escape your hands, holding the now burning cigarette high above your heads as he tackled you.

“Van, watch that!” Grasping his arm, already picturing the holes that he would burn in the sheets.

aka, the best week of wasting days together.

-

“Vaaaan” you sung down the line, “please hurry!!!!!”

“Alright, babe, alright. I’m coming!” He laughed,

“I know but we have a lot of catching up to do, you know” he could practically hear your smirk through the phone.

“Oh babe, so sordid” He teased, lowering his voice into a growl so the whole of Tesco’s wouldn’t hear him. “You’re the one who wanted wine!”

“All I really ever want is you, Van”

-

“Babe! Come ere’!”

Vans voice echoed through your bedroom over the sound of the shower.

Pushing on the en suite door, the bathroom flooded with light, revealing his face peeping round the edge of the fogged shower screen, hair wet and silently reaching an arm out for you. You smiled, keeping eye contact as you pulled his old tshirt over your head, quickly loosing your underwear and letting him pull you towards him.

Van twirled you round, pressing your back against his chest, arms tangled together across the front of your body under the water.

“I’ve been thinkin bout baby names” he whispered ,

“Oh yeah?” You laughed, classic Van you thought, “A bit premature, no? I’m not even pregnant”

Van moved to rest his cheek on the top of your head, pressing a kiss to your hair before untangling his arm from yours, watching as he reached out to write on the glass.

L, Y, L, A

“Like the Oasis song” he whispered.

[orionchildofhades]

steddie swapping soulmate au part 14

part 1 |[...]| part 13 | part 14 | part 15 | Ao3

---

Time passes.

Steve and Robin unexpectently grow closer, some mutual understanding and rather uncomfortable first meetings (mainly due to their switches happening far more often than Eddie's and Steve's) leading them to a profound friendship.

Steve is glad for it.

After his initial hurt, he found that Robin's friendship was far more valuable than the others he had been nurturing throughout his life, far more consitent and honest than the whispered rumours and mean laughs thrown at the expense of others.

Steve, for a while, kind of forgets about Eddie. The only reminder of his being his soulmate are Robin, usually holding a dangerous glare through the cafeteria when she sees him doing his theatrics and spitting on the jocks -and honestly everyone else that is not part of his little Dungeon game.

The year ends without flourish expet the rumours of Robin and Steve dating.

That happened in a rather catastrophic mess of events when Robin was being violently picked on by some guy who had tried to ask her out and were calling her names, and making some horrendous promises to help her 'turn back'. Steve had rushed there, he had previously been foaming with anger near his locker, and stepped in before Robin to tell them to back off. Things had escalated until Steve felt forced to say that they were dating. The bastards had soon left after that, apologising to him of all things.

Robin had cried that day, so tiny in his arms and had admitted that maybe, only maybe, people thinking they were romantic soulmates was not that bad because she honestly couldn't deal with it sometimes.

Steve had wondered how it felt. Because he was a year older and was part of the cool kids and even if some people liked to joke about being bent or queer or fags or God knew what, nothing had ever felt quite as scary as watching Robin stuck between them.

So now people were sure than Robin and Steve were a thing, and girls kept sending him looks before whispering how far beneath him Robin was, or how they couldn't understand what he saw in her, but at the very least summer was coming and they'd both be free from all the heavy glare.

Robin had actually met Steve's parents, both when they had switched and later been asked to come for dinner and even if she was not part of the 'proper society' his parents were so keen on having close, they could admit that she had some potential. The fake couple had not shared with them the fact that Robin played soccer and played the French Horn out of all things because honestly Steve did not want to bother with it. His father believed that only men should play sports and his mother was a fervant believer than the piano was the only good instrument there was for a young lady, or perhaps the harp if one really wanted to get out of their way to be extra.

Out of everything, life was pretty peaceful. Robin had helped Steve study during their so called 'dated', and she had also got Steve playing soccer with her. He still hang out with Tommy and Carole but he didn't really bother trying to stay with the rest of the rising popular gang. They had promised each other to leave Hawkins, for college first, but then to find a nice place, open minded and accepting, for Robin to officially go on the dating market because "Steve, I can't do anything here, you don't understand how the girls are here. Even if some are pretty, they are so...Hugh". Her last point had not been exactly clear as she had thrown her arms in the air before collaping back on the table. Nonetheless, Steve was ready to follow.

It all crashes down when Steve and Eddie swap for the third time when Will Byers goes missing.

[thestobingirlie]

i read this post that said robin was written to show steve wasn't homophobic anymore but "that doesn’t mean I’m just going to forget how he implied that Will deserved to die because he’s gay, so what now? Steve is growing and changing but that doesn’t just take away everything he’s said, especially since he has yet to apologize to Jonathan. There’s a reason why Will and Steve have zero scenes together!" like it makes no sense firstly bc robin wasn't even originally written as a lesbian so that just doesn't line up. then steve also never said will deserved to die bc he's gay; he never actually said anything about will's sexuality, his comment about will is about the byers family being full of "screw-ups" which steve actually classified as separate from gay ppl at the start of his mini monologue lol (by saying he thought jonathan was queer but he's actually a screw up like his dad). sometimes i think certain ppl have never actually watched that scene bc they just use it as a Steve Said Bad Things free space where they get to invent what he said. he did apologize to jonathan, it was literally the only reason he was at the byers' house, but it was interrupted which led to steve both saving jonathan's life and buying him a new camera. the thing about will and steve not having scenes together is baffling to me. their storylines just never intersected like s1 will is gone, s2 will is possessed while steve is helping junkyard trio, s3 steve is held captive in an underground russian bunker, and s4 will is literally in a different state on the other side of the country.

yeah, i saw that post lmao, real fucking stupid. it’s just so funny to me that these people accuse us of reducing robin to just being steve’s friend, and then can’t see past her sexuality in regards to her character? they’re the ones making robin just a lesbian bff, not us.

and saying that steve hasn’t had an impact on her character?? rewatch the show! steve’s the reason that robin feels comfortable in who she is, that she rambles and jokes around instead of fronting her stony facade from s3. i honestly think these people only care about robin in regards to a certain character they ship her with. because they seem to know nothing about her.

thank you!!! he never implies will is gay. at all. why would steve know or care about the sexuality of some random 12 year old?

and, 100%, people take that scene and mold it into anything they want just to rag on steve, and it’s super telling, because they’re constantly getting it wrong. some people decided that steve called jonathan a fag, which is the most annoying to me, because at least get the slur right lmao.

steve fucked up, absolutely. but he did apologise, and he did save their lives, and virtually sacrifice his own when he decided to run back into that house. had steve not done that, jonathan and nancy would be dead. just a fact.

and the will and steve sharing scenes thing is especially funny to me, because they’re just part of different plots. they have shared scenes, and will clearly has no problem using steve to get free movies like the rest of the kids, so there’s no animosity there.

[thesonicpunk]

yall are so sweet in the comments of my fic BUT. IF I READ ANY MORE OF YOU FUCKERS APOLOGISING FOR YOUR ENGLISH CAUSE ITS NOT UR FIRST LANGUAGE I WILL kill a bitch /affectionately. first of all you guys are writing perfectly good english!!! never has someone said this and then not written perfect english lmao. second: guess what. english is not my first language either!!! i probably wont notice if you make mistakes because i make them too. third: even if i noticed them WHO CARES ABOUT MISTAKES. not me. i care that u r being kind. which 99% of u are. (that 1% is that one random lurker that always comments as a guest (scaredy cat) with the name G.O.D. calling me a fag and whose comments i immediately delete anyways because yes i am, and so are sasuke and naruto)

ANYWAYS BASICALLY i love u non-native english speakers. talk dirty (broken english) to me all u want. or write comments in ur native tongue CAUSE I ALWAYS TRANSLATE THEM AND TRY TO REPLY anyways.

[rogerswifesblog]

3 - The Devil I Desire

My masterlist

Series Masterlist

Previous

A/N: Hello! Sorry for being so incredibly inactive but…I don’t have an explanation. I’m a bit unmotivated. I hope you’ll enjoy this chapter even though it might be a bit sad. Don’t hate me, I’ll make it up to you…I hope

Warnings: heartbreak, betrayal, cheating, not Peggy friendly, not Steve friendly, homophobia (from Steve:(), internalised homophobia (also Steve.), yeah Steve is a total dick, don’t hate me

Pairing: Silver Fox Steve Rogers x College student Bucky Barnes, Bucky Barnes x Brock Rumlow

“Bucky you have to come out at some point, you know?”, sighed Wanda while leaning against the bathroom door, in which Bucky had locked himself in since this morning. “No. I don’t want to”, he hiccuped back, sitting on the other side of the door.

He didn’t want to face anyone, especially the realisation that Steve didn’t care about him at all. More than that. He just used him for his needs. Bucky felt humiliated, used and dirty.

And stupid.

He just felt incredibly stupid for all that.

But Steve seemed so…trustworthy. How could Steve turn out to be so different? And how could Bucky be so naïve to believe him. All the lies he had told him. Everything just so he’d sleep with him.

“Bucky please…come out, I’m getting worried”, Wanda interrupted his train of thoughts. She was right. He should come out, talk to her but he was embarrassed to admit how stupid he was.

Sighing he turned they door key, immediately feeling how Wanda opened the door, making Bucky fall onto the living room floor.

Wandas apologising face came into his view and he swallowed hard, knowing it was time to open up.

“He…he’s married. And he used me. Just for fun”, Bucky hiccuped.

Waking up in Steve’s arms was a great feeling. He felt his warm arms around his body, Steve’s solid chest against his back and…slightly hard cock. Excitement immediately rose in him, arousal too.

A sleepy smile crept onto his lips as he slowly turned around, placing a soft kiss on his lips. Could this be his future? Lazy sex in the morning? Waking up in a tight hug? Surrounded by the smell of Steve and soft silky sheets?

But as soon as Steve opened his eyes Buckys little dream of a domestic relationship broke.

“Fuck”, was the first thing Steve said, looking at the digital clock next to his bed before moving in lighting speed. It was only 9 am? Maybe he had to go to work? Even though Steve had said he’d want to eat breakfast together, have a coffee…and it was also Sunday. He wouldn’t be working on a Sunday morning at 9 am, right?

“You have to go. Now.”

With that Bucky got even more confused, sitting up. “Do you have to leave or-?”, before he could finish his question Steve threw his clothes at him, while Bucky sat up, “no. Go. Fuck off. Go home or whatever. You can’t be here”,

“I don’t get it-“ “oh my god, I’m a speaking in a different language? Don’t you understand me? Get.the.fuck.out. You were supposed to leave after we finished. God damn it. I never fell asleep”, the last sentence was only a quite mumble to himself.

Steve wasn’t even looking at Bucky while he was putting on his jeans. He didn’t even notice Buckys teary eyes. The trembling lips. He didn’t give a damn about him.

But he had promised-

“It was all just sweet talking you into my bed, don’t you get it! I wanted to fuck a tight young ass with a pretty face. You are one, Beck”, even saying the wrong name showed how little Steve cared. He didn’t even remember Buckys name. Ouch.

“Let’s talk about it-did something happen-?” Bucky tried to say something but steve only laughed coldly. “I can’t believe it. You either dress now or I’ll throw you out naked, I don’t care. It was just for fun”, ���but you said-“ “I said many things you wanted to hear, that’s all. Now get the fuck out before my wife and kids come home and see you, you little fag.“

Bucky had no idea at what point he got up, but the next thing he felt was a painful tingle in his palm when he slapped Steve in the face.

They looked at each other for a second, Bucky now openly crying while quickly putting on his cloths and leaving the bedroom, immediately looking for the way out, not fully remembering where the frondoor was.

Bucky heard Steve’s steps behind him, so he glanced one last time at the man he had hoped to wake up every morning from now on, before slamming the door closed.

He probably imagined the hurt expression on Steve’s face.

“Oh buck….”, Wanda whispered when Bucky told the whole story, wrapping his arms around him. At this point they were sitting in the living room on the couch, wrapped in a tight embrace and cozy blanket. “I’m so sorry…you did nothing wrong-“ “I shouldn’t have trusted him”, he interrupted her with a hiccup.

“No, no…it’s not your fault. He is the one who leads you on. He’s the one who did it all on purpose. He manipulated you”, the woman whispered wisely, kissing Buckys tremble gently as he quietly cried into her shoulder.

Bucky spent most of the day wrapped in the blanket, eating fast food and tons of ice cream before passing away on the couch late in the evening, tears still drying on his cheeks from all the crying over Steve.

Even though Steve had broken his heart the days passed and with every next morning the pain stopped to be so noticeable, till he completely stopped thinking about Steve. Well, not completely but it didn’t affect his daily life anymore.

So after six months he finally managed to go on a date with a nice guy from grindr, Broke. From the start on the conversation was great, they talked about random stuff and also serious topics. It just…clicked.

After leaving the restaurant Broke walked him home, gave him a kiss goodbye at his door and went into the direction of his home, looking one last time at Bucky with a sweet smile.

Maybe this was how it should’ve happened. Maybe he had to get his heart broken to meet someone who’d treat him better.

Bucky invited Broke to his place after the sixth date. Even then nothing happened besides some making out and light touches. He felt comfortable with Broke. Bucky could tell he wouldn’t be played this time. Not like Steve had played with his heart.

Even though he really tried not to think about him, he had to admit the older man still crept into his mind sometimes. Not that it surprised him. Steve was the one who took his virginity and then treated him so awfully, who wouldn’t think back to that sometimes?

He told Broke about Steve after two more dates. He understood Bucky and promised not to rush him with intimacy.

They were officially together after the tenth date.

A month later they said the first ‘I love you’s, even though Bucky didn’t feel the movie-like butterflies in his stomach, but he believed it might have been just a myth. The butterflies in the stomach probably didn’t exist.

(He tried to ignore the memories of how his whole body had tingled when Steve had kissed him.)

Even though everything went smoothly, he could tell the happiness wouldn’t last for much longer-and he was right.

Alpine disappeared.

“Maybe she just went out for a short walk? You know, to enjoy the weather-“ “Broke, don’t try to calm me down, I know she’s not just out for a walk-she hates going outside! Besides, it's raining!”, argued Bucky, looking one more time into the little cat house she was usually sitting in.

Nope, still gone.

A son escaped his lips. “What if-what if someone steals her? Or worse-a car runs-“ “then let’s go, we’ll look for her.”

But they weren’t lucky, even after two hours of looking for alpine everywhere.

“Where did she go-Brock, what if-“ “Baby, stop crying. She’ll probably come back soon”, Brock sighed, slowly getting annoyed at Buckys behavior. He understood the cat was important to him, but he just didn’t want to listen more to Buckys whining.

“But I can’t go to sleep now-she’s not home, she’s not in her bed and she can’t sleep outside-she’ll think I abandoned her-“ “oh my god, shut up. I’m tired. It’s nearly ten pm and we were walking through the city for hours. I want to go to sleep”, Brock hissed at Bucky, making the younger man's tears fall quicker.

a sighn left brocks lips as he pulled bucky into a hug, “sorry…im just tired. We’ll look for her tomorrow, promise”, with that he managed to pull Bucky with him to the bedroom, even though it was harder than he hoped.

What Bucky didn’t know is that the alpine was safely sitting in a stranger's living room, after having found an open window and climbed inside.

Comfortably sitting in a little boy's lap, being pet by him. “-I don’t wanna go to bed yet, please! Dad I don’t want to”, he whined, while looking down at the cat and then back at his father. “Harrison Joseph Rogers, I’m not gonna continue this discussion. I gave you thirty more minutes to pet the cat, but now it’s nine thirty and I want to see you in your bed in ten seconds”, Steve said, crossing his arms.

He could see his son wanted to argue more, but he only furrowed his eyebrows, put the cat down and stomped to his room. “As stubborn as his father-“ “not any less than his mother”, Steve said when Peggy entered the living room. “Touché.”

“But now the more important question…what do we do with the cat?”, asked Steve’s wife, placing a bowl of water onto the floor. They both watched as she drank. “I’ll check the address tomorrow. It’s not far from here so I can go there in between meetings. Tonight she’ll stay here…it’s raining”, Steve petted the cats head. She was very sweet. Familiar in a way…it’s like he had seen those blue eyes before.

He sat down on the couch, watching as the white creature walked over to him and jumped onto his lap. Even though he had never been a big cat person he scratched behind her ear, noticing the small old rip in it. She must have been though some stuff, but her new owner cared about her a lot. He could see it. This person must be worried sick since she ran away. “Who do you belong sweetheart….”

He looked at the little badge at her collar. Alpine Barnes. Hm. It sounded familiar….

But he was probably imagining it. It was just a cat.

Thank you for reading! I’d appreciate some feedback ❤️ please don’t forget to like, reblog and comment ❤️❤️

What do you think will happen next? Why does Steve behave like this? 👀 I’d love to see some of your ideas

Taglist: @ozeriterchick @guiltypleasureisfun @ayronren @gracescor3 (I’ve decided to tag some people that might be interested! )

All posts taglist: @rogersbarber

[obsessive-jan]

I want a fic where teddy gets domestically abused by r3nfield while they kiss and the toxic relationship cycle continues fr

[the-demons-within]

Klance angst week: Tuesday

Trigger warning: homophobia, cussing,

(L)

"C'mon Lance," he. Said hyping himself up and slapping his cheeks. "It's just a confession. What's the worst that can happen?"

"He could hate you forever,"

"You'll never be friends again,"

"You know that we are right,"

His mind continued to taunt him endlessly. "Shut up!" He shouted in a whisper. For once, the voices were silent. He got up from his comfortable place on the bed and walked over towards the door, opening it and heading to go get food.

He arrived, grabbing a plate of food and sitting to enjoy, eyes scanning around for a certain someone.

"Hey Lance!" Keith called from a bit over, walking over towards the table Lance was sitting at and placing his food down. He sat down next to Lance and began to ramble about the troubles of today and how he got yelled at my pidge for putting his reds in with the rest of the washing. After 10 minutes of chatting and eating, Lance and Keith head back to Keith's room.

"So, what are we going to do?" Keith asked.

"Well, um, actually... I need to tell you something..." Keith focused on the taller boy, ready to listen to what Lance had to say. "Look... Keith," he took a deep breath." I'm not straight, and I really like you. " he rushed past the last part. It had already taken far too long to say. Lance looked up at Keith with anticipation but was met with a face of pure discust.

"What the fuck!? Ew" he said, scrunching his face up. The pure look of discust of Keith's face would have been enough to shatter Lance, but it continued further as his eyes brimmed with tears, threatening to fall " Your GAY? Why? That's so gross, you are discusting"

"But- it doesn't change anything" Lance sobbed lightly.

"Yes it does, that isn't normal, get a grip on yourself, or someone needs to fix you" Keith continiued to spit at Lance, each insult, each rejection, stuck into Lance, driving a dagger further and further through his already bleeding and shattered heart. As Lance stepped forwards to attempt to make things right and apologise, Keith pushed him away. "Get away from me you fag!" He yelled, pushing Lance violently further towards the door. As a heart broken mess, he looked back one last time at Keith, a violent and descusted look plastered across his face. Lance finally stumbled through the door as a crying, Sobbing and aching mess.

(K)

"He's gay?? And he likes ME. Uugh, is shouldn't have said those things, he may be ... gay... buy he is my friend.

"Oh please you know being gay is wrong, and un natural, and filthy and-" Keith shuddered, sitting down on his bed.

"Oh God... I'm turning into my dad". Keith reluctantly remembered his father, the abuse, trauma, homo and zoo phobia. Worst, he was a paedophile. Him and his sister Sabrina had the scars, although whilst most of Keith's were physical... Sabrina on the other hand...

"Uugh shut up you stupid brain", he scolded himself harshly. "I just need to go over there and apologise, simple." With that out of the way, he got up, making his way to the most likely place that Lance was...

His room

Keith arrived and knocked on the door

"GO away" Lance's voice still sounded dry and croaky.

" Lance I need to apologise" this, seemed to grab Lance's attention, he blew the door open, fury riddled across his tear stained face.

"Oh fuck off." Lance spat at Keith.

Look, dude I know what I did was wrong but I didn't mean-"

" what the actual fuck do you mean "you didn't mean it" he mocked "What makes you think that you can apologise now, what gives you the right?!" Keith opened his mouth to speak. "No, shut the fuck up you homophobic bitch. Why do YOU get to come here and apologise after you broke me, I don't care that you rejected me, I care that you ruled it in and were an over all fucker about it! You don't get to come her to apologise to me just so that you can clear you own guilty conscious!" Shiro came around the corner to see what was going on with Hunk and pidge in tow. "I'm sorry" " doesn't cut it, I need to see results!"

"Hold on, what is going on!?" Shiro demanded

"Shut up shiro" Lance snapped "I need you to have said those awful things in the first place, do you understand me Keith. Just because you had a rough upbringing, doesn't mean that you can take your internalised homophobia out on me! Okay!?..." Keith looked at Lance in awe. Pidge, shiro and Hunk.were simply staring, mouths agape and eyes wide open. Finally, there was a strange silence that hadent been heard for a long while at this point.

"I fucking hate you Keith, get out of my sight." And Lance slammed the door.

[true-blue-sonic]

The more we're talking about Silver not seeing how big a red fag Mephiles is by appearance alone is making me think 3 things,

1) Silver was so desperate for a solution that he willingly ignored Mephiles appearance (and any other red flags) since Mephiles promised him that solution.

2) Mephiles isn't the other strange looking Mobian they've come across (Blaze does hint at there being other survivors and while I doubt they have the Mobius equivalent to a Fallout Ghouls, anything is possible in the Sonic universe)

or 3) Silver (and possibly Blaze) are really face blind.

I personally think it's mostly the first option, yes. We see in the game that Silver is getting incredibly frustrated by Iblis' invincibility and the fact he constantly comes back without ever being defeated for good. Thus, it's not surprising to me that someone with Silver's traits immediately goes for it when a solution offers itself, even if that solution comes from someone highly sketchy whose answers are definitely occasionally vague. And it takes quite some time for Silver to be knocked out of the Iblis Trigger mindset! Amy makes it become unstable, but Blaze strengthens it again, and it's only Shadow's intervention and the truth of the matter all but getting slapped in Silver's face afterwards that makes him change his mind in full. (Not that he apologises for it, lol.)

And also, Mephiles when he's not in his crystal form looks... alright enough? Bit shambly, mouthless, and his eyes are creepy, but that's just about it when it comes to the weirdness. Definitely the appearance of an anthro, helped by the fact Silver does not know who Shadow is at that point in the game. And nobody else comments on Mephiles' odd characteristics anyway, which I still find rather intriguing. I really just do have the feeling they didn't animate Mephiles' mouth due to time constraints and left it in as a There's Something Off About This Man hint hint wink wink to the audience... which fell entirely flat because nobody says anything about it despite it being such a prominent characteristic, and thus it's all but meaningless.

So overall, it's definitely a flaw of Silver's that he immediately, almost eagerly, throws himself into murdering a person to save his world based on strange information from a stranger person, but I do understand it. And it just doesn't help that nobody comments on Mephiles and the oddities he has on him: if the characters don't seem to care about it, why should we as audience believe that there's anything off about him that's concerning to them?

[dreadisdelight]

PLEASE DONT READ IT YOURE SENSITIVE TO LGBTQIA+ TOPICS!!!!!!!!:

sometimes i just sit there and wonder what i identify as.

i grew up in an area where i didn't have much representation of anything, "gay" was an insult and colours were dedicated to specific chromosomes. if you grazed football as a girl, you were seen as a tomboy alongside if you even looked at claires you were just odd. i think some messed up part of me still believes that, despite every fibre in my being disagreeing with it. there wasn't much representation of being homosexual in a form or another, mainly just jacqueline wilson books i peered into with such curiosity and utmost wonder.

it sort of struck me that i was different when i was much younger too. hell, sleepovers with girls scared me since they smelled so "sweet" or they were much prettier than me. we all watched films with the odd kissing scene and wanted to peer into the mirror, maybe attempt at looking into it without shame. it didn't stick, yet it didn't wipe off. i kissed a girl on her cheek in my bedroom when i was about nine, fags the most ive ever done, and i don't count it fully either. i kissed a girl on her hand too but still, that doesn't count in my books. nobody ever had the "it's okay to be gay" talk with me but they never had the "being gay is a sin" either. it just sat uncomfortably in the room. all the pins and homemade flags were just pretty colours opposed to something with significance in this world. ive tossed the majority of the relics besides a pin i bought when i had a sense of freedom for the first time but that's about it at most. we still haven't talked about it, and we don't intend on it either.

i remember my mom watching a tv programme with me, her eyes flickering towards me whilst saying "i don't get why people come out. i get where she was coming from, as if it was natural, but she was also the figure who never brought up these sort of conversations. the woman who made me feel a sense of crushing burden when i felt a sense of anger. i just shrugged it off, and never gave my views on the matter. i think if i had the confidence, i would have said something along the lines of "it's because we live in a society where showing who you really are needs courage".

i think i did tell her i was pansexual when i was younger too, this was during a mist of things where id say random bullshit to them as a joke, hoping they'd want to linger nearby. i haven't said a word yet.

gender was another thing that puzzled me, which still does. i never really thought much about it, i just thought you were female, male, or non-binary. that's it. no more options, just three buttons and you could click one. i used to lie awake, my mind thinking about issues for me to go 'holy shit am i trans??' which obviously still happens; why would i be writing this out otherwise? i dipped into being demigirl to nonbinary to immediately agender and i sort of sat there, sticking a label on it like they have to me with other diagnoses. i go from wanting big tits and being the epitome of feminine beauty to wanting to have top surgery and going by a new name. i know gender is a spectrum, but some part of me knows everyone around me wouldn't accept me, thinking im more mentally ill than i am.

i don't know why i decided to type this out either. maybe to give myself clarity instead of chastising myself for what's happened in my world.

ive only ever dated afabs. one cis. one somewhere between demigirl and nonbinary and the other transmasc. i know i hurt them one way or another, and so did they. i speak to one of them a few times now and again but for the other two, i apologised to one of recent and it's stuck to my mind. the other i fucked up so bad it hurts to look into a mirror. i think amabs scare me and i don't know why. i attach myself to older guys in films and loosely to other people, remarrying shane in stardew over and over again. one minute i have a preference and then it drastically changes.

my friend once said that people who are lgbtqia+ must have some evolutionary default in them, which i believe heavily. i have autism and probably some other stuff undiagnosed (my autism is clinically diagnosed yall) so that checks out. i saw a survey a while back that most people who are lgbtqia+ are diagnosed professionally or self with something along the lines of adhd, autism, and other mental disorders. but that's all we are. disordered motions, grasping onto conclusion.

maybe one day i will find somebody and it will make perfect sense. maybe i won't find anybody. for now, i know that i can only try, and when i try i collapse in tears wondering why nobody likes me.

[dhbkiscbkyxcb]

a very unnecessary pinned post

highly doubt anyone is going to follow this blog who doesn’t know me irl but just in case:

hi! i’m kit, she/her and he/him pronouns are preferred but i don’t mind others. i’m big lesbian commie catgirlboy from british land and this blog is mostly for reblogging, being silly with friends, and once-in-a-blue-moon original thoughts that i deem worthy of subjecting the internet to. main long standing fandoms are malloysicals, hadestown, hannibal, yellowjackets, doctor who, and wolf 359 plus whatever i’m hyperfixating on at present. i apologise for all the muppet joker reblogs.

tags (to be added to eventually):

meows into the void — original text posts

the void meows back — answering asks

i think we all fag — gay shit

insert music tag here - guess.

[myxomavirus]

they also didnt steal their flag design. listen im a fag and i previously wasnt this invested/knowledgeable in lesbian flag design origins but just with an hour or so of research i was able to discover that several people independently had the idea to make flags combining colours from the lipstick lesbian and butch flags. heres just a few people that emily allegedly copied from because no one can seem to decide who exactly lmao (here , here , here)

youll notice 1. most of these have the femme colours on top and therefore literally arent the same, and 2. the person with the other most similar design (butch colours on top) doesn't think emily copied hir ''because we used the same design process'' and apologised for initially thinking so.

as far as i can tell emily was the first person to make a flag combining lipstick lesbian + butch flag colours, and also assign the colours new meanings instead of being another person to say ''wouldnt it be cool if i combo'd these''. whether or not you think assigning meanings to the colours constitutes ownership, it was extremely significant in popularising/''canonising'' the design and you cant convince me the person who made these important contributions should be e-begging for grocery money no matter how hard you try

i did misremember who made the 5-stripe version though when i mentioned disney merch. i thought the 5 stripe version was also made by emily for ease of independent merch manufacturing (less extremely similar colours to dye/sew together/etc) but while the reason is true it was created by @purrfectbycath (info thread here which also touches on some points i made in this post)

Interview with Gilbert Baker