#i am such a debbie downer sometimes i'm sorry

[elaynetrakand]

valyriansword replied to your post “You know what i’m really not looking forward to? That inevitable...”

Oh...it hurt reading this. :(

I know, I’m sorry. :(

The silver lining is that at least you’re sort of prepared now? I guess?

[lizzybeth1986]

Thought I’d give you a heads up before you do this week’s TRH QT: usually assets for the entire book are released with the first chapter (hence spoilers about the MC), but the diamond gown from this chapter in Auvernal appeared a week or two ago. This might be relevant or it might not, but to me it suggests that this chapter might have been a last minute decision, not planned from the very beginning. PB very rarely adds outfits later on and if they do, it’s usually after a hiatus (e.g. ATV).

Thank you for the head's-up, Nonny! I had a feeling about the silver dress, because I definitely didn't see it when I saw a video of the dresses already drawn and completed. I'm told that certain times some aspects are not kept in the game if it's going to be too spoilery, and certain times some things are simply just added later.

I...suspect (like you) more that this chapter might have been a last minute addition, because a few things in the chapter (how all over the place some of it was, for example, and the Hana sequence seemed like the kind that they would at least do a little buildup to) did seem a little shoehorbed. This is also the only chapter Hana gets a tiny (very tiny if you think about it) bit of space for herself, where the things that affect her get at least more attention than how the MC can best use her. While I'm happy it's there, the possibility that it may not have been included in the original plan (over even the revamped plan for TRH)...doesn't look good from a Hana perspective, esp when every other "pre-planned" chapter seems to ignore, blindside and treat how she feels like it means nothing.

[moistmailman]

Jaune: Man I'm hungry. Haven't eaten anything all day.

Pyrrha: If you want then I can give you a good meal.

Jaune: I don't want to be an annoyance to you.

Pyrrha: Jaune look at me. There's not a single thing in this world that will ever make me think that you're an annoyance. Ok? You are a great guy.

Jaune, sad: Yeah, but it's hard to think like that sometimes; especially since you have to train with me every night to make me any useful with a sword. I just feel like you could have gotten a better partner is all.

Pyrrha, looking him in the eyes: Jaune, you are a sweet and an amazing friend to be around, and I treasure every second with you. So please stop talking like that, because it's more painful for me to hear it than it is for you to say it.

Jaune, blushing:..........do you really mean all of that?

Pyrrha, smiling: Yes I do.

Jaune: Ok thanks then. Sorry for being a Debby downer.

Pyrrha: It's alright and you're welcome. So how about that meal I mentioned earlier? You'll love it.

Jaune, chuckling: Sure, why not. I am hungry after all.

Pyrrha, smiling sweetly: Really? Ok then, and trust me, you are going to LOVE it. *Starts to take off her skirt*

[kikyan]

I'm sorry that that happened :( if it makes you feel any better, your friends probably want to help you and don't feel annoyed when you need a moment to vent. Some people need to talk through their trauma. I have a friend who went through some shit as well, and sometimes she calls me up to talk about it. I'm not happy when we talk but I focus on what I can say and do to make her feel better because I care about her. And I am sure your friends feel that same for you, as you would for them.

Thank you, and I truly appreciate it. Sorry for not answering as often, I took a break of sorts from both my group chat and online a bit to clear my head. I love my friends and I understand that they would do the same for me, but due to past trauma it’s hard to come to terms that they care for me. Thank you for responding though, sorry to be a bit of a debbie downer, but thank you for allowing me to express myself and how I feel about the situation. 

[jensungf]

(1/?) okayy so this is gonna be a long one as I was just informed that the reveal is tomorrow as I forgot what day it was - quarantine has really ruined my perception of time 😳(this is also why you turn on notifs for the main page eek!) We usually bake separately because we'd argue over how to do it otherwise... my french is limited to telling you that i'm listening to music in the bakery or my weekend plans, useful in some cases and complete nonsense in others... (🍉)

o(2/3) It would be so nice if they could rest, they deserve it, but also selfishly i'm kind of excited 👉👈I think it could be any unit, they're really confusing us, also this thought came to me but might be impossible, do we think Hendery dyed his hair just for bad alive or maybe... its a bit far fetched but... a U unit? I'm wishful thinking at this point. Ok so I had a look at the main page because I'm a bit of an idiot and hadn't checked for tasks, but I have some questions for you 👀 (🍉)

(3/3) What was your favourite hairstyle in 7th sense era and what is your favourite NCT hairstyle since? rank your top three Kpop songs, and why? what about your bias makes you happy? and finally if you could have one wish, what would you wish with that one wish? - sorry this is so rushed my perception of time and space have completely gone out the window (but i'm excited for the big reveal tomorrow 👀I am not sure how you'll react) - 🍉

omg ima respond under the tag SORRY IM SO LATE I JUST GOT ON DESKTOP

dont worry bub bc tbh I HAD NO IDEA THAT THE REVEAL WAS TMRW HAHAHA so ty for telling me (and same!!! omg dont worry i cant believe its alr august hhh ଯ( ॢᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈)ॢഒ ) and omg that sounds like smth that would happen w me and my sis HAHA except i dont allow them in the kitchen or else theyll fr burn everything down (the feel when theyre like 10) but nonetheless thats so cute! and ur french is still interesting nonetheless liek having teh ability to even comprehend another lang in the slightest is a major feat and sometimes i surprise myself when i understand like slivers of spanish so dw bub! its all just for u <3 

omg bub ur not being selfish at all bc ur still supporting them but unfortunately rest is not a word that sm can read e.e but its good to be excited! i am as well!! and omg yeah its so confusing i lich rally have no idea what to expect so in order to ease my anticipation ive decided not to expect anything at all HAHAHAH but omg.. nct u w hendery? thats unheard of but u never know!! and asdfghjkl i feel like a debbie downer for bringing this up but i feel so bad that sm sort of forced him to dye his hair blonde :((( like they asked but he didnt seem too happy when he said he dyed his hair ugh but wtv sm is booty wbk lets just appreciate how good he looks!! and OMG NO ITS OKAY i think the tasks are optional bc tbh i havent checked the main page and done any of them either! its okay bub dont worry!! 

i honestly... umm... dont remember the 7th sense era LOLLL lemme google it rq — ok ima be so honest rn. i looked and i dont like any of them 😭😭😭 ITS OKAY THO CUS THEYRE ALL KINGS! 

my fav nct hairstyle... i honestly have to give it to jaemin like i CANNOT get over how fkn good he looked with long blonde hair and the blue bangs in boom. thats my fav look on him hands down and im in love w that style!! 

my top 3 kpop songs,, honestly the ones that came to my head were my boy - secret, moonlight - got7, and love is not over - bts, which is funny cus i never rly talk ab these songs but theyre soooo good idk i can listen to them on repeat. 

okay so ima talk ab both jeno and jisung hehe so jeno!! honestly i just love him bc hes so fkn talented and hardworking but also his presence is so calming and just how much he rly cares and thinks ab the ppl around him. like hes funny in his own way but the way how he said once when he filled out this questionnaire thingy that he’d prefer to follow than lead, but now all of the members look to him as the unofficial leader. he comforts them all whenever they need sum and check up on them and he took initiative even tho it was difficult for him and there are things that he sets goals to improve in and he does so well bc he works so hard. like he wasnt comfy talking but hes literally a spokesperson and well-known emcee now and he tries his best! and not only that but also how hes very talented in everything and how soft and caring his personality is. not to mention his duality. i could go on forever but if u read all of this, ily 🥺

for jisung, he makes me happy bc of how he interacts with everyone! like hes so young but hes super talented and still super humble and just seeing him be a kid makes me forget about my worries and it reminds me to just let myself be sometimes cus yk he had to grow up rly quickly and his success came from hard work and it makes me happy to know he got what he deserved!

and if i had one wish.. ig this is cliche but i truly wish for world peace. like the peace of mind for everyone in the world bc we all deserve to be happy and altho the future seems obsolete, we all need a sliver of happiness and hope to make life worth living

AND PLEASE BUB DONT WORRY AT ALL ABOUT ANYTHING i cannot wait until tmrw and i dont mind that this is rushed!!!! <333 i appreciate u sm and i seriously cant wait until the reveal! <3 im so lucky to have u as my anon ur the sweetest! also pls feel free to answer all the questions u just asked me bc id love to know!!!!!!

[princessnijireiki]

not to be a debbie downer but my parents love that show "finding your roots" (??? or sth idk) with henry louis gates jr. and like

there are ppl who trace their families back for centuries or even over a whole millenium in some cases & bc of a variety of Bad reasons, that is literally… unfathomable to me

which I've talked about before but like

honestly the sheer destruction of the kinds of genocide and trauma that rip people from their families & destroy their peoples' own historical records or even like ban language or reading/writing in their own AND their oppressors' or captors' tongue is like… totally fucking wild

on top of the violence of you go back a certain amount of years and that's where the sidewalk ends bc this is when you've hit your bill of sale, where you landed at the other end of this grey area of being cargo & transitioned from an entity to an object, or this is when you hit the holocaust and I'm sorry but no one else in this town made it and there are no records of who their families were before that…

not even accounting for rapes and abortions and bastards and miscarriages on top of the scoops and boarding schools and children smuggled to safety/"safety" who were never returned to their families or cultures or homes, even if there was anything left to return to

it's like being out in the cold with a short jacket and a thousand years long road of skeletons trailing behind you rattling in the dust to keep you company, without names or faces to know them by or have them to know you & see you

just as a baseline.

on top of your trauma. your parents' traumas. your grandparents' traumas. going backwards forever and you still keep on living knowing you could be wiped with a reset button just as easily as all the ghosts who came before you.

and that's what diaspora's like, that's what diaspora is, that's what being a post or post-post genocidal survivor means & it's hard sometimes, you know? it's incredibly fucking hard. it's heavy & ugly, but it's mine, I wouldn't trade who I am for anything… and even with all of that, none of it makes that any less hard.