#i am so thankful for flight trackers for reassuring me every time

[queen-hastur]

nobody talks about how scary planes are at night especially when you have poor eyesight

like why is there just an ominous glowing orb in the sky

[gingerwritess]

captain. james. conrad.

why did you just make me so thirsty for some pilot!reader x Captain James Conrad, anon??

don’t worry i’m still a loki slut i just wanted to try this baby out. i’d love to hear your thoughts?

also sorry no read more tag, i’m on mobile :(

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You’ve helped him out before, but today seems different.

He stalks across your landing pad with his head held higher than usual and is in your chopper before you’ve even left the pre-flight office, waiting for you with an impatiently bouncing knee. Not that he’d ever actually express his impatience, he tends to stay polite—most of the time.

Brutally honest and possibly even cocky at times, but for the most part, it’s a rugged politeness.

“How we holdin’ up today, Captain?” You yell over the roar of the rudders, clapping a hand on the top of the pilots-side door.

He shouts something back to you, his normally gelled hair fluttering under the wind picked up by the rotors, but you can’t hear a word he’s saying. Holding up a finger, you toss him a clunky headset as you climb into your seat, tapping the microphone on your own with a pointed look to use it.

The headset cackles to life and Conrad’s smooth accent fills your ears: “Haven’t I told you to call me James?”

“Sorry, Cap’n Crunch, guess I forgot.” Your fingers tighten around the pitch-lever and you twist around in your seat to flash him a quick grin.

Those aviator sunglasses block his eyes from you but you like to think that behind those lenses, they’re twinkling with some kind of amusement at your attempt to make him smile.

“Can we just leave, please?” The static in the headset hurts your ears.

“You in some kind of hurry?”

“You could say that.” He raises an eyebrow above the gold rim of those damn glasses—you’re pretty certain he has beautiful eyes. But also pretty sure that you’ve only ever seen them maybe once or twice.

“Fine, fine,” you tighten your belt and flip a few switches, turning around for one last smile. “You might want to strap in, weather’s not looking too promising.”

The captain fakes a sigh and begrudgingly buckles the safety belt around his waist, spreading his arms with a small smile when he finishes. “Satisfied?”

“Alright, remind me not to care for your safety next time, sheesh.”

You feel a teasing flick on the edge of your shoulder from the seat behind you and the strange song of static and that accent cuts through your headset again; “just fly, little bird, I’m a busy man.”

He’s smiling, you can hear it.

“Aye aye, captain.” You reach behind you with a reassuring thumbs-up, and the copter lifts steadily into the air with a deafening roar.

Do something crazy. Flip upside down or something, your flight-fogged brain starts shouting at you once home is out of sight behind you—not a good idea, brain.

But the captain—James, I guess—does seem a little quieter today, a little more somber than usual. You glance down at the coordinates he had given you—huh. It’s just a little bit off the coast of the last island in the cluster on which you live, but it’s just open ocean right around there.

“Where is this, cap—James?” Your headset cracks and sputters as you speak, and you point to the tracker screen. “Isn’t that just water?”

His answer is clipped, but not exactly cold. Just...distant. “Yes.”

“Okaaaay...then why am I dropping you off there?”

You think he’s chuckling, can’t really tell through the speakers.

“Boat drop off, genius,” he explains, leaning forward to tap a finger on the screen. “There will be a ship right there if we timed it right. I’ll hop on and hope to god that it’s not navy, see where they can take me.”

“So you don’t really know where you’re going?” You manoeuvre the copter above a group of particularly tall palm trees.

“Well...not exactly.”

“That doesn’t worry you?”

“Quite the opposite, actually.” When you glance behind you, he’s leaning his head out the open side of the chopper, watching land get further and further away.

Boy, someone’s talkative today.

“You okay, captain?”

His laugh echoes through your headset and you wish you could see his face. “James. I’m fine, thank you.”

“Well, James, I’m...” you pause, already cringing. “I’m, uh, here for you—I mean, I’m here if you want—need! If you need me.”

He might be laughing again, you can’t tell.

“I appreciate that, thank you.”

A few more minutes pass and you get nearer to the drop off, where you’re just going to watch James jump out of your chopper into the ocean and turn right back around to your dreary life of back and forth. Seems wrong, really, to just let him jump into a free fall like this.

Oh well. He’s always been one to toy with death, even in the small amount of time you’ve been flying him around.

You try one more time for a conversation. “How long are you gonna be gone this time?”

He doesn’t respond for a moment and you wonder for a split second if he fell asleep to the lulling rock of the helicopter.

“I don’t know that either,” he finally answers, his voice staticky, disconnected.

“You don’t know where you’re going,” you clarify, worry starting to crease your brow. “And you don’t know for how long...this isn’t another one of your business trips, is it.”

White noise on the other end of the line. You start to think you went too far, got too personal too quickly, but then the headset shudders back to life.

“I’m...looking for something.” He pauses. “Somewhere, I suppose.”

“I hope you find it,” you offer, unsure of what that’s supposed to mean.

“...would you mind if I told you something a bit—a bit personal? Just, you know, before I leave.”

“I’m all ears, captain.”

“I tend to move around a lot. In life, I mean.”

You laugh and try to hold the copter steady as a light rain begins to fall. “That’s pretty obvious.”

“Most of the time, I enjoy my nomadic life,” he sighs, and you can tell he’s struggling to find the right words. “But lately...lately it feels hollow. I feel lost.”

Your grip tightens around the pitch-lever between your knees—you weren’t expecting something so, uh, deep.

Life advice has never been your forte.

The captain’s crisp laugh fills your surprised silence. “I’m sorry. That’s quite personal, isn’t it?”

“N-no, I’m just—”

“Don’t worry about it.” He chuckles and out of the corner of your eye you see him turn to the open door again. “We hardly know each other, I shouldn’t come to you with my problems.”

It’s true. He’s only been on your island for what, a little over a month? And you should’ve known he wouldn’t stay, the reputation of the captain held true. He loses himself, finds himself, and moves on to the next thrill.

You say “your island” like it belongs to you.

Or like you belong to it.

“Well, I’m here to help in any way I can,” you chirp, turning around to give him a reassuring smile. “Maybe it’s better that we have this, uh, ‘strictly professional’ relationship? ‘Cause you don’t exactly stick around much.”

“That’s true.” He goes silent for a moment. “I’m going to miss this place, to be honest with you.”

Miss this place? This lame little island in the middle of nowhere, this tiny little port town where nothing happens, with only one starbucks and about a million taco joints?

“Consider yourself lucky,” you chuckle, starting to even out the copter as you near the drop-off. “You get to leave, go new places. Meet new people.”

“It’s not always as enjoyable as everyone makes it sound.”

For some reason, you flirt with the idea of just turning around and taking both of you back home before he can throw himself out of the chopper for good.

His daunting accent cuts through the static once again. “You’re an idiot, you know that?”

“Excuse me??”

The copter hovers in place and James unbuckles his safety belt, grabbing his bag and slinging a parachute over one shoulder. An amused smile playing at his lips, he leans over your shoulder to peck a quick, almost nonexistent kiss on your cheek.

The nerve of this ridiculous man.

“You are a pilot.” He laughs at the surprise still on your face from that very out-of-place kiss. “The world is yours, you can leave whenever you want. Why won’t you leave the nest, birdie?”

Keeping the chopper level over the cargo ship he had so correctly predicted would be there, you snap your head over to stare at him—this is more of a conversation than how most of your distracted “where to?” normally goes.

Of course, when he’s about to jump out of your helicopter and never come back.

Great.

“That’s...personal.” You hope the uneasiness isn’t too obvious in your voice.

“Shame, really.” The captain straps the parachute over his chest, tapping a quick finger against your forehead. “I’d have liked to get a little more personal with whatever goes on in that strange head of yours.”

“You’re such a charmer, Conrad.”

“James.”

“Whatever.” You roll your eyes with a teasing laugh. “Maybe if you ever lose your way back around my dumb island, we can go back to that bar I found you in?”

“Fairly certain I found you,” he counters.

“You were too busy schmoozing the bartender for a free shot. One shot, captain, was it worth it?”

Now he rolls his eyes, making his way to the open side of the chopper and bracing himself against the top with both hands to the metal, looking over his shoulder at you. “Says the one who was flirting with every guy in the bar for free drinks. Then you thought I could be swayed.”

“You almost offered...”

“I just needed a pilot.”

“Sure.” You wink at him and flash him a sarcastic thumbs up.

He shakes his head with a small grin and turns around to face you, double checking his chute and tapping a two-fingered salute to his forehead. His smile falters for half a second and you almost miss it...he’s about to jump.

“You could stay,” you blurt when he reaches up to remove the headset, cringing as soon as the words leave your mouth. “We could go get that drink right now, I’m—I’m buying!”

The captain laughs. “You sound like you’re going to miss me, sweetheart.”

“Pshh, no, don’t flatter yourself.”

Uh...hell yes I am??

“Mhm. I’ll miss you too, if that makes you feel better,” he teases, hands playing with the band of his jeans, retucking-in the periwinkle shirt stretched taut over his chest.

“Oh really? Why’s that, oh captain my captain?”

He bares his teeth in a teasing scowl at your little nudge, then crouches near the open side of the chopper, holding on to the side to keep from falling right out. “You’ve been one of the best pilots I’ve worked with.”

The captain smiles at you and takes off his headset, just holding the mic up to his mouth.

“And you always seemed to know how to get me where I need to be.”

Then he tosses the headset back to you, lets go of the chopper, and plummets through the air with the open sea rushing up to meet him.

**not tagging anyone cause it’s not Loki and idk if y’all are gonna like this heh :))**

[stories-from-my-mind-to-yours]

You don't know you're alive until you're almost dead.

Cpt Craig Stevens of the United States Space Marine Corps made his way sliding down the emergency ladder as the sirens were blaring through the ship. His augmentations made him faster, smarter and stronger than humanly possible. His eyes saw every detail of every inch even at almost free fall speed. The signs with levels swooped past his eyes, as he saw level 17 he jumped off, ready to turn right and run to the armory. That was, if there had been any working artificial gravity on 17. There wasn't. He tried to turn as he soared through the air at break neck speed, but to no avail. He desperately clawed at everything, ANYTHING, to stop him from hitting whatever was in his path. In the corner of his eye, he saw the large titanium beam he had just propelled himself towards. "Fuck, this is going to hurt", he thought to himself before the violent impact knocked him out.

Mission specialist/engineer Sophia Karlsson woke up as the first alarm sounded. She practically jumped into her uniform, grabbed her utility belt and looked up at the stat screen. Her eyes widened in pure disbelief, and she bolted through the barely opening door, snatching her MPH (Multi purpose helmet*) from the shelf just outside the door. She felt a massive shiver through the floor, and almost fell over. It had felt like an earthquake, in a spaceship! She put her belt and helmet on, and called out for The ships A.I.

"T.I.N.A! SITREP! deploy repbots A.S.A.P and close all air locks! I wanna know what's going on NOW!" Her training kicked her into overdrive, adrenaline rushing through her veins, it felt like ages before Tina replied.

The familiar robotic voice crackled lightly in her ears before complying.

"A hull breach detected at level 6 caused an automated sealing of all adjacent air locks. Atmosphere holding steady at 86%. A.G.I (artificial gravity inducer*) down on levels 13, 17 and 21. Repair bots deployed. Multiple casualties detected. Smoke alarms on multiple levels."

"What the hell is going on Tina?!" Sophia shouted with a slight hint of panic in her voice.

"I do not know." was Tina's simple reply.

Commander George Engel of the United Space Federation, captain of the USF SX Concorde, woke up freezing, disoriented and had trouble breathing. His ears were ringing, he had a blasting headache, and he didn't even notice the gaping hole in his bedroom wall, that he was on the wrong side of, before his heart had stopped beating. His last thoughts were that he did like the view. Ice covered his grey hair quickly, and his eyes glazed over. Along with himself, a large number of bodies were slowly drifting away from the damaged spacecraft.

MS/E Sophia Karlsson knew she could be hot headed, stubborn and sometimes arrogant. But she loved her job, mostly. But trying to repair a ship possibly under fire, ON fire, isn't anyone's favorite job. But her quick thinking had probably saved at least a dozen lives, even if no one else knew it. She connected the last circuit board to the A.G.I control board and rebooted it. The dull thumping of the gravitational generator recommenced. The vibrations were further apart now, like whoever was firing at them were getting bored. Were they under attack? She wanted to know, but didn't expect someone to tell her. But she had to try.

"Tina, get me the bridge on vidcom."

Her helmet-screen came on, Major Erik Karlsson replied. His familiar voice calmed her frantic pulse, and reassured her everything would be all right. She saw only his right side, as he focused on other matters, his helmet sat at the control panel beside him. He looked drenched in sweat, his red beard dripping. He glanced at the screen beside him and smiled.

"Tell me how bad it is."

Sophia quickly summarized what she knew.

"31 unaccounted for so far, 19 badly injured or deceased. Fire is out, A.G.I. is up and running, hull damage manageable and repairs underway. What happened? Sir." She added hesitatingly, not sure of his new position, he shouldn't be on the bridge?

"Tina, give us a private channel." Tina acknowledged their comlink was secure with a sharp beep. Major Karlsson continued. "It was a meteor shower. Caught us by surprise, since the proximity radar had been turned off. Get me the log, I want to know who did it."

"I'll get on it right away. Anything else?"

He turned to face her on the screen for the first time during their short conversation. She wasn't ready for the gash that ran across the left side of his face, where his eye had been there was a bloodied bandage, and his neck, beard and uniform were stained dark red. A bioseal covered the lower right half of his face, meaning he had been treated for his wounds already. The sight was almost too much for her, and tears started filling her eyes.

"I'm just glad you're alive sis. Everyone above me in rank got sucked out when the captains cabin were hit. Every door opened shortly before. Only reason I'm alive is because I heard the doors open, so I got up and closed the airlock between our half and the senior officers department. The officers in training can get loud sometimes you know?"

She realized how close he had been to dying. Her throat clenched up, and he saw the expression on her face and chuckled.

"It's ok sis, I'm not dead yet, and I don't intend to die either. You just keep us floating and we'll be all right, ok?"

She still couldn't utter a sound, so she smiled, he smiled back, that crooked smile was made worse by half his face being missing.

"You didn't feel anything when this happened right? I knew that twin clairvoyancy was bullshit." She laughed out loud, the shock of seeing her brothers face like this had her mind in shambles. If there was one thing he could always do it was make her laugh. He was her big brother only by a few minutes, but he was as steady as a rock, a fixed point in whatever storm they were in. She couldn't bare to loose him.

"Can you take a look at level 6 when you have time? I hate to load everything on you, but I don't know who I can trust right now." She nodded, then quickly realized he couldn't see it.

"Yeah sure." Her voice held, but just barely. He smiled at her again, then resumed his duty as Commander. Talk about a speedy rise in rank.

She terminated the vidcom and collapsed on the floor. Tears streaming down her face, she shivered from head to toe. 50 probably dead. Sabotage. Murder. On a space exploration vessel? Why? How? Her mind was going on adrenaline, shock and recycled oxygen, she needed a drink. Or five. "Tina, secure the logs, and get me Craig on vidcom." She needed him, now, more than ever.

"Captain Stevens is unavailable for vidcom at the moment. Logs are secured."

"Well where the hell is he then?" Her heart skipped a beat.

"Captain Stevens tracker is at level 17. His Multi purpose helmet seems to be in his personal locker." Tina replied.

"Yeah of course, why have your helmet on you, that would be stupid."

Tina didn't reply.

She headed for the elevator, but it was used for transporting injured down to medbay. She sighed and glanced at the sign next to the elevator, indicating she was on level 30. Great. Only 13 flights up by ladder to 17. She opened the service door next to the elevator shaft and started climbing.

The medbay was jam packed. The I.C.U was full, all nurses had been on their feet for 20 hours, and doctors Green and Moreau were exhausted. But finally everyone was stable. They had only lost two to their wounds, thanks to their surgical skills, and fantastic nurses. Doctor Tom Green collapsed on the couch in their shared office. Doctor Frank Moreau was already sleeping in his chair. They had both taken more than one stimpak, and the crash was imminent. He just hoped nothing else would happen for the next six hours. He slowly drifted of to dream land.

Sophia had reached level 21 and her arms and legs were burning. Only four levels to go she thought to herself. She secured herself to the ladder and leaned back to rest for a moment.

"Tina, show me the logs from when the proximity radar was disabled." Pages of green text on a black background appeared on her screen. Last disabled by Tom Hardy, engineering, one hour before the meteor shower hit. "Tina get me Tom on vidcom."

"I am sorry, I can not find Tom Hardy on the ship." Replied the synthesized voice in her ears.

"Show his last known position."

An overview layout of the ships profile were shown on her screen, a small green blip appeared on top of the bridge outer hull as the ship profile turned three dimensional and turned to show his position relatively to the underlying structure.

The proximity radar tower was immediately above Commander Engel's quarters. Coincidence? Perhaps. But she intended to find out.

"Show me Tom's location at the moment of impact." The image showed Tom's blip floating away into space mere seconds before the first meteor hit them. Something had happened, Tom had been there, but she couldn't say if he had been involved in any way. She dismissed the images on her screen and continued her climb.

On the bridge order was slowly returning, as their new captain slowly assessed his new crew members. His voice was firm and clear, but his mind was racing. He had not been vetted for command as he had a minimum of 6 years to clear the experience needed to be even considered. But he had been an officer in USF for seven years, had commanded several ground missions and he was well known for his calm no matter the situation.

Lieutenant Carlisle requested his attention.

"Commander, we have a possible jackpot 90 minutes out, please advice."

"On screen." He replied.

The screen showed what looked like a replica of Earth. Clouds, seas, and land, it looked perfect.

"Any designation Carlisle?"

"Negative sir, unregistered planet."

He had no choice. They were in desperate need of repairs, and planetside repairs would take immensely less time. "Helm, plot a course, slow and steady. Get us there in one piece."

Their unanimous "Aye sir!" made him smile. Ah, to be young and foolish. He was 32 himself, one of the youngest to make officer, and by far the youngest to make commander. But the circumstances were just that, circumstantial. "Now let's just survive this day, and then we'll see." He muttered to himself.

Sophia had reached level 17 only to realize that the door was jammed. Of course, how could it not? Today was not a good day. Everything was going to hell. What more would turn out to be a disaster today? She sighed. She connected her arm-mounted service module to the door, and forced a manual override. The door groaned loudly as it slid almost halfway open, revealing total chaos on the other side. She squeezed through the opening and stepped into the hallway. "Tina, where is Craig?"

"Captain Stevens location is Junction 6 Delta."

She looked up at the orientation signs at the top of the wall. 6 Bravo. She went right, towards junction 6 Charlie. When she reached Charlie, she couldn't see Delta. The passageway was completely blocked by debris. She went straight ahead but there was no way she could get through. She used her card to unlock Charlie 8, whoever lived there wasn't home anyway. The small living space was tidy, and looked exactly like all the others. She opened the closet towards the Delta wall. All closets had emergency doors in them, in case the electronic doors failed. "Tina, open Charlie 8 emergency 2 please." The door slid open, revealing a wall of clothes behind it. She moved the clothes aside and peeked inside. Empty. She stepped through and made her way through the cloned room to the door, which slid open silently. The debris blocking the corridor to her right was a massive wall, but she couldn't do anything about that now. To her right was Delta junction, but no Craig. "Tina, where is Craig?"

"Captain Stevens location is Junction 6 Delta."

"Show me his tracker on screen." A fluttering image of the junction from above showed him to be just around the corner to the left. She took two steps forward and stopped. Blood. So much blood. She dashed around the corner, careful not to slip in the sticky red substance, her heart beating so hard. "No no no no no, Craig, nooo!" Her panicked scream echoed of the walls. She tried to jump over the pool of blood on the floor, landing on her knees in it, she checked him for a pulse. She couldn't feel anything. His face was pale, eyes half closed, lips blue. "MEDIVAC NOW TINA!" She screamed, she couldn't hold back the tears and panic in her voice. She held her ear above his mouth, and felt the faintest breath escape his nostrils. She couldn't see where he was bleeding from, but she didn't dare move him. An automated emergency stretcher unfolded itself behind her, and beeped loudly to call attention to itself. She slid out of the way quickly, her hands covered in Craig's blood, the stretcher folded itself over him, sealed itself and shot into the emergency transport chute. She sat sobbing on the floor, convinced he wouldn't survive. The floor in the hallway was covered in blood from side to side.

The emergency alarm sound in the medbay, which announced 10 seconds to arrival of an emergency stretcher. Doctor Green shot up from his chair, bloodshot eyes and a headache from hell, but he was awake at once, knowing he didn't have a second to spare. The second alarm meant 5 seconds to arrival, but he was already out the door.

Two android nurses came bursting out into the ambulance room, just as the stretcher came bursting through the door, alarms blaring and red and blue lights illuminating the walls. It landed on the table in the middle of the room and unfolded it's passenger. Doctor Green immediately called out for five units of blood, and turned captain Stevens in his side. He had a deep gash across the base of his neck, but there was almost no more bleeding. "Make that 10 units nurse! NOW!" Nurse Avery, an android powered by Tina, was way ahead of him. She already had two bloodlines connected, as well as stitching the deep wound in the captains neck. Being augmented, he had quick release connections in both his armpits, giving him a fighting chance, but hypoxia will kill any brain, augmented or not. Sophia had made her way to the medbay a few minutes later, and watched through the small window in the door as Tina embodied every tool at her disposal to save his life. A hand on her shoulder startled her, a small scream escaped her mouth before she jolted around and saw Tina's second android nurse Ava. "Forgive me Sophia, I didn't mean to scare you."

Sophia waved her hand at the android, and looked over her shoulder at the lifeless body on the medical table. She whimpered helplessly, tears flooding her eyes again.

"You shouldn't be here Sophia, please come." Tina's soft voice calmed her a little bit, but not much. She shook her head and exclaimed sharply "No! I'm staying here, I need to see him!" Sophia collapsed once again to the floor, sobbing uncontrollably, the fatigue finally catching up to her. Tina lifted her softly and easily into her arms, and carried her to the waiting room couch. She held her closely, while simultaneously working on the love of her life. Tina diverted more computing power to the android nurse, helping it make its best effort at saving Craig's life. Artificial intelligence shouldn't have favorites, but T.I.N.A isn't any AI. And Sophia was her favorite human.

Sophia woke to doctor Green lightly shaking her shoulder. The expression of resignation on his face was what she had feared. Her mind in shambles, she had no reason to hear his apologies. She bolted upright and ran to the window. The table was empty. The android nurses stood at their charging stations. Everything stopped, time ceased to exist. The only thing in her universe was pain. A whimper of helplessness escaped her as she slowly lost all power in her legs, the pain inside tore through her like a plasma grenade, and her scream could be heard several levels both above and below. She didn't hear the door opening behind her, the sound of heavy boots on the floor, she didn't hear her own voice screaming, a deafening sound that drenched everything. But when she felt the familiar arm around her back her scream suddenly ended, the other arm grasping her legs and as lightly as a feather lifted her up to his chest. She looked into his icy blue eyes, she could barely breathe, she clutched his hair in her hand, she pressed her face in his neck and she cried. And she slept.

Part II

https://roninjason.tumblr.com/post/171918375360/you-dont-know-youre-alive-until-youre-almost