#i am scared though. how will we handle this

[kogane-twst]

I went at an amusement park yesterday so:

My headcanons on TWST boys spending one day at an amusement park and a scale of how much they like it. (+ my ocs at the end)

(We already know some things from Playful Land event BUT these are my personal hcs. I forgot about how they were in the event and I'm too lazy to look for it)

(I'm mostly talking about roller coasters because yeah)

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Riddle Rosehearts: 6/10

With his strict childhood, I don't think he ever went at amusement parks. But he would be an enjoyer of soft rides, but just watching roller coasters would give him an headache honestly. He always make sure everyone respect the rules too bc well it's Riddle. He enjoys it a little, but don't even start saying he's a coward, he'll collar you.

Trey Clover: 6/10

More adamant on going through roller coasters and end up enjoying them. Maybe he gets a bit sick and he probably goes on only 2 roller coasters during the whole day. (I forgot how he was during Playful Land bro..)

Cater Diamond: 8/10

Roller coasters are cool, he always tries to spot the cameras and do a cute pose, so he can buy it and post it on Magicam, he even might post the ones when he looks horrible just for giggles. He also talks with the mascots and everything just to take pictures. Basically likes it!

Ace Trappola: 9/10

Loves it. He probably went on many amusement parks with his brother so he's used to them. He says "Roller coasters? Heh, I'm gonna ride them all!" But once he's at the peak just before the descent you'd feel him tense up. Then he lifts his arms and screams like crazy.

Deuce Spade: 6/10

I think it depends on who he's going with. If it's Ace, bro's done. If it's with someone softer like Trey(?), he'll enjoy it! Because Ace would provoke him and force him to go on many rides and he'll end up throwing up. He likes the sensations, but let him time to adapt.

Leona Kingscholar: 5/10

He's not scared, nor does he hates it. It's just annoying. He just doesn't wanna walk around a big park because why would he walk that much? If you taunt him a little he might get on a very very tough roller coaster just to prove something. If you sit next to him during it, you'll see the less enthusiastic person you've probably ever seen. He treats it like a chore, and he's serious about it. You'll hear him mutter something like "why am I here" right before the descent and see his fingers twitch. He's not an arms lifter bc he finds it ridiculous but don't worry he enjoyed it. BUT taunts doesn't work if there's a loop in the roller coaster, like he'd NEVER make himself go through something this crazy. (Holy yap)

Ruggie Bucchi: 7/10

Probably not the one who paid his ticket (but we all know that) so he makes the most fun out of it. Yet he still end up throwing up what he ate because he went on too many rides AND ate too much. Great day though!

Jack Howl: 6/10

He's not scared. Totally NOT. What made you think that? The way he hesitates before saying yes when you ask him to come along with you on the biggest roller coaster of the park? The way he has a tight grip on the protection? That's just you being delusional bro. He likes the thrill, but he's a little scared.

Azul Ashengrotto: 1/10

He's just here to see if he can get any contracts. And analyzing how restaurants work here and use the business as an inspiration. Probably corner some people after one hell of a ride and ask them if they might want to sign a contract to not feel sick and asks whatnot in exchange. Probably gets taken for a crazy guy. He doesn't get on ANY rides. Even the soft ones. Even with taunting, he doesn't fall for it. (Blackmailing might get him tho)

Jade Leech: 0/10

Haha. This guy? He can't even handle flight lessons, what makes you think he could handle rides? Even those for KIDS he's NOT getting in. He'll be like "Boo hoo, why are we forcing through my boundaries?" if someone insists on him getting on a ride. He maybe gets on one just because. He sits next to Floyd and both wishes they never sit next to each other again, but for different reasons. Floyd's reason is because Jade threw up on him. Never again.

Floyd Leech: 10/10

Do I really have to explain? He goes on the same roller coasters 2 or 3 times just for the thrill. He really LOVES it. He shouts and laughs like a crazy psycho guy and if you think it fades because other people scream too you're wrong. Everyone hears it. And if you sit next next to him (aka Jade) prepare yourself, your ears are gonna bleed. Anyways, he loves it.

Kalim Al Asim: 7/10

He owns an amusement park, you can't change my mind. He tried getting on all rides but ended up throwing up after the third roller coaster, Jamil never let him ride one again (unless he's with him). He still loved it!

Jamil Viper: 5/10

Depends. I don't really know. With some taunts he might get on a roller coaster too, only ONE though. He ends up enjoying it but probably gets a headache at the end of the day (both because of Kalim and the roller coaster)

Vil Schoenheit: 6/10

Look, he has two options. Either he doesn't get on ANY rides, either he carries a big bag around with him with everything he need to re arrange his face after a ride. Wether it'd be for his hair, makeup or anything really. He might likes the sensations though. Also post pictures on Magicam.

Rook Hunt: 7/10

He doesn't hesitate on bringing a bag too for his face, but maybe a little less stern on this because he wants the thrill too! Does multiple roller coaster and screams how "MAGNIFIQUE!" (Beautiful) it is. People think he's crazy too but it's fine. Enjoys the day!

Epel Felmier: 9/10

Oh boy, another thrill enjoyer! Since his village is in the mountains he probably didn't go on amusement parks before. But he heard of it and he loves it even before going at an amusement park. He makes the mistake of eating a lot and end up throwing up. But he lives for roller coasters and gets on a lot of those. Loves it.

Idia Shroud: 0/10

...I mean.. No comments. Doesn't even come.

NO OKAY SERIOUSLY. 4/10. He likes watching the others suffer but he won't get on any rides. Not with THESE people (like NRC boys). He also thinks strangers will judge him so yeah. Likes to try and win some plushies though.

Ortho Shroud: 7/10

I don't know if he can feel the sensations but he still gets on roller coasters and loves it. He may or may not make up some fake death percent just to scare people before going on a ride. Like "Oh, I figured out you have 54,8% of dying if you go in! Don't worry though!" But when I say just before it's like 10 seconds before the descent. He's quick to reassure you according your vitals if he really scared you and propose to hold your hand, don't worry. Still an evil boy kinda.

Malleus Draconia: 7/10

Doesn't understand the concept. "Humans created rides to scare people..? And they enjoy it..? How.. fascinating." Don't worry Malmal I asked myself the same question. But anyways, he goes on any rides Lilia recommends him. Mostly roller coasters. Doesn't have a clue why people are screaming. I mean, he feels the sensation, but he doesn't scream or anything. People think he's weird. He likes it, somehow? He does like the fact he got invited though!

Lilia Vanrouge: 10/10

Our third thrill enjoyer! Might be old but he loves it. Maybe gets a little sick but it's totally fine. I don't have anything to say, aside he participates in the "taunting Leona so he gets on a roller coaster". Oh and he also likes to trick people into "soft" rides when they're not.

Sebek Zigvolt: 5/10

Just Ace ragebaiting him and he's getting on a roller coaster. "HA! WHY WOULD I GET SCARED OF SOMETHING SO TRIVIAL?! I'M A ROYAL KNIGHT WHO SERVES THE GRAND MALLEUS DRACO—" "Uh huh, you're just avoiding it." And he's rushing to the queue. During the descent? Silent. Yes. Sebek Zigvolt, silent for once. You'd think he fainted? No he's just wide eyes and enjoying(?) quietly. He brags how it was easy but his legs are kinda shaking. Dies when someone mentions it and apologizes because "HOW RIDICULOUS OF ME! WAKA-SAMA I'M SORRY!" Why? Idk bro it's Sebek. Probably enjoyed the day?

Silver Vanrouge: 6/10

Soft rides enjoyer but he might fall asleep in those?? So he does get on a roller coaster (probably in the same one as Sebek) and he's silent like Sebek and wide awake. He claims he enjoyed it though. You can't really tell, but he probably truly loved it.

OC CONTENT FROM THERE!!!

Reika loves it more than Kogane. Hell she's WORSE than her. It might be surprising but since Reika doesn't feel strongly emotions, she wants to experience what being in a roller coaster feels like and once she does she's addicted to the feeling! Has the biggest grin on tough rides like totally different when she's normal. Worse? You don't even see any consequences. She doesn't throw up, doesn't get an headache. Nothing. Like NOTHING. If she manage to make Idia comes with her he won't get on any rides but if she buys pictures he'll see her having the biggest smile and he'll say "Who are you what did you do to Rei?" Does all the rides with Ortho while Idia stays out. Idia eventually gets on ONE roller coaster because Reika told him "You trust me, right? I already went on this one, you'll like it." And he might have fell for it. Unlike Kogane though, it was true and he genuinely had a good time. Maybe a little stressed but with Reika at his side it was enjoyable. He was able to see her big grin in real.

Kogane is an asshole. Being poor she didn't go on any amusement parks before, but she still loves thrill. She probably looked up ALL the rides and she'll say "Ohh yeah this one's soft, let's go." But DON'T FOLLOW HER. She doesn't even know where she is going she'll end up pulling you in a ride with a loop in it and you'll wish you never met her. Ace and her are the worst duo because they always try to get anyone to go with them on big rides. She's the one who started the whole "Since Leona is scared let's go without him." And Ace, Lilia, Vil and even Malleus followed with it. She has the best times in amusement parks. But she still end up a little sick and maybe throw up after some roller coasters. Tricks Azul with blackmailing (probably has a weird picture of him somehow) and goes with him on a roller coaster that involves water. He didn't bring any clean shirt to wear so he spends the rest of the day with a wet shirt. He swears one day to get her for it. She and Ace brought Deuce on a roller coaster and right before the descent she told him: "Hey Deuce, did you say one last time "I love you" to your mom?" And "These might be our last moments together you know.." and Deuce will yell at her to shut up while she laughs.

Seiji is.. Seiji. S for scared.

E for evitant.

I for "I'm scared but I won't admit it."

J for "Joy's not here" and the last I for "I'm not going on roller coasters."

Is he scared? WHO SAID THAT??? Absolutely not shaking bro?? He does a great job at hiding it though. Like people thinks he's just sick easily when he throws up and they feel bad for him. They think it's just his body not liking it but that he does like it. Anyways don't pull him by force please. He'll just follow Reika because he 100% trusts his sister.

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That's it! Thx for reading! 💕💗 I didn't re read this so sorry if there are mistakes..

@waitlexist azul is a loser 😊

[silusvesuius]

i legit love when a character's gender is so integral to their personality (and perception obviously.) like so concrete that if genderbent their whole shtick would just be absolute dookie. anyways i'm just writing this text so i can talk in the tags (My beautiful safe haven)

this 14 minute song is soooooooooooo FYRE

[running-in-the-dark]

I was pretty proud of myself for getting through this day so well (first time one of our cats had to have surgery), BUT it's 4am and it's really hitting me now 🙃

[occasionalklance]

.

[impish-baby]

More dad survivor x zombie reader + an old friend :) (tw: dead animal, guns, emetophobia, threats of harm)

"Aw, sugar.." The dead bird is the farthest thing from appetizing but you look so darn happy offering it to him, how's he supposed to say no?

"You're the sweetest, daddy will eat it later, ok?" That at least seems to be satisfactory enough for now, as you drop the poor thing down onto the park table.

The playground has long been abandoned, left in disarray since the apocalypse hit, that doesnt stop Hank from finding it absolutely adorable when you try to climb up a slide. Nearly gives him a heart attack though.

"Baby, come on, you're gonna hurt yourself." He wonders if you remember being little and playing here, your memory isn't the best when it comes to some things but you sure seem to recall what it takes to give him gray hairs. "I know you think it's fun, but your old man really couldn't handle it if you got scratched up while you're messing around."

You get hurt so easily now a days, he's basically toddler proofed the house all over again and yet you still find a way to bang yourself up when he's not around, that's why he's taken to tying you up when he can't keep an eye on you.

When you do finally decide to slide back down, Hank immediately sweeps you up into his arms with a soft chuckle. "Alright, alright, I think you've had enough outside time for today, we should be headin' home."

It would've been a good day, a great one even, if he didn't catch the glittering of a silver barrel from the corner of his eye.

"Shit-" Hank has never been more greatful that he was holding you, because you lunge automatically for the stranger and likewise closer to the gun. "No, sweetheart, shhh..shh..calm down.." God, he'd love it if you listened, it's hard to pull out his own pistol while trying to wrangle you into staying put.

Other survivors aren't very common in town, most people left after the first few months.

"You gonna let that thing go so I can shoot it?" He recognizes that voice, and it makes Hank's heart sink into a pit in his stomach. "I ain't.. Hank?" A familiar face is rare, a friendly familiar face is nearly unheard of.

"Don't shoot, don't shoot, just step back for a minute, alright?" When Hank glances over, he wasn't expecting Bo to be emptying his stomach onto the cement.

"I- Fuck-" The man retches again, dryheaving. "You.. God, the kid.." An honorary uncle, Bo knew you since the day you where born, he didn't see the day that was meant to be your last.

"I know," You stopped struggling once you heard his voice, eyes wide as you simply whine to be let down. "You're gonna have to wait, be patient, hun." That never was your strong suit. "The grown ups need to talk."

"Hank.. man, you gotta let them go.." There's tears in Bo's eyes as he takes a cautious step forward. "They're dead. There aren't any ifs or buts, that's a corpse. You can't-"

"That is my child," He's been a sinner for a long time, if it comes down to it, shooting his brother will be one of his worst. "My baby, what kind of father am I to hurt them?"

"A merciful one!" There are days you wake up confused and scared, you cry for hours or at least your body tries to. "They aren't a person anymore, Hank, they aren't themselves. You're fucking lucky they haven't bitten you yet!"

"I'd welcome it if they did." He's thought about it, that first night when you went cold in his arms and many more after that. "You pull that trigger and that's it, a life without my kid isn't worth living."

"Dammit," Hank almost collapses in relief as the gun is holstered, putting his away as well. "You're still an idiot, huh? Figures.."

Bo approaches slowly, never taking his eyes off your still form. All you do is smile and try to reach out for a hug, but he cringes away with a look of disgust.

Hank's heart breaks as you tuck your teary face against his neck. He doesn't know how to explain in a way you'd still understand, all he can is press a kiss to your forehead and shush your sniffles.

[zwartexxroos]

[📼] Headcanons of Marvel Men when you dragged them to watch horror movies together.

(including Tony Stark, Steve Rogers, Bucky Barnes, Peter Parker, Loki Laufeyson, Stephen Strange, Logan Howlett, Charles Xavier, Erik Lehnsherr, Steven Grant, Joaquin Torres, and Johnny Storm)

Tony Stark

"Horror? You mean, like, fake horror or 'this is gonna traumatize me' horror?"

Jokes the entire time.

Throws popcorn when jumpscares hit—at the screen.

Lowkey startled multiple times but pretends he’s not.

“I wasn’t scared, I was just reacting for your entertainment."

Ends up clinging to you when he thinks you won’t notice.

Steve Rogers

"Sure, I can handle a horror movie."

Lies.

Eyes go wide during creepy music build-ups.

Gasps quietly when something jumps out, then looks embarrassed.

Subtly scoots closer.

Probably ends the night saying, "Let’s balance that out with a comedy next time…"

Bucky Barnes

"No. Absolutely not. I’ve been through enough horror already."

Yet… ends up watching it.

Stone-faced the whole time, like nothing phases him—until a ghost crawls on the ceiling.

“I'm done. That’s some unnatural shit.”

Secretly enjoys how you clutch his arm.

May or may not use the excuse to keep his arm around you all night.

Peter Parker

"Uhh—like horror-horror? Like, paranormal or slasher? Wait—is it gory?"

Nervous bouncing leg.

Grips the popcorn bucket like it's a lifeline.

Hides behind a pillow but still peeks through.

Ends up holding onto your hand like it’s his lifeline.

“Next time can we watch Pixar instead?”

Loki Laufeyson

"Pathetic mortals and their idea of horror. I could do far worse with a flick of my hand."

Unbothered… until the atmosphere gets too real.

Quietly mumbles, “That spirit’s possessing the wrong vessel…”

Smirks, but you catch the tension in his shoulders.

“I am not afraid. But if you are… you may cling to me.”

Ends up clinging to you later when a exorcism scene goes wrong.

Stephen Strange

"I’ve literally fought creatures from beyond time and dimensions, this is nothing."

Fully confident. (at first)

Then something moves in the corner of the screen and he pauses like: “…Okay, that was well done.”

Watches with arms crossed and half-judging the plot.

Casually throws his cape over your shoulders when you get scared.

Will not admit it if he flinched even once.

Logan Howlett

"Tch. Waste of time. Horror ain’t scary when you’ve lived through it."

Sits grumpily.

Grumbles at characters making dumb decisions.

Until the chainsaw scene starts. Then he tenses.

Might slip an arm behind you like it’s no big deal.

“If anything touches you, I’ll gut it. Even if it’s fictional.”

Charles Xavier

"As long as I don’t accidentally pick up on your panic, this should be enjoyable."

Calm and collected.

Then you jump, and it makes him jolt too.

Chuckles softly, brushes your hair aside, whispers: "You’re more entertaining than the film, my dear."

If you already watch it once, would definitely reading your mind halfway through just to know when the scares are coming (he cheats!).

Erik Lehnsherr

"I don’t see the appeal of fear-based entertainment.

Sits through it quietly… at first.

Then absolutely tenses when something crawls across the ceiling backward.

Narrows his eyes like he’s about to metalbend the ghost.

"Why would you enjoy this?"

Kinda loves the way you press yourself against him.

Steven Grant

Super enthusiastic—loves horror lore.

“This one’s got great reviews! You’re gonna love it!”

Halfway through: whispers history of the haunted object on screen “Y’know, in ancient Egypt, they used to believe—”

Will totally grip your hand during scary bits though.

After? “Brilliant film! Fancy another one? Or should I… walk you home?”

Joaquin Torres

“Horror night? I’m in!”

Brings snacks, cozy blankets, a positive vibe.

Ends up screaming once and then laughing at himself.

Constant commentary like: “Nooope. Couldn’t be me. I’d be OUTTA there.”

Sneaks an arm around your shoulders “for comfort.”

Afterwards? “You should totally sleep over—uh—so you’re not scared, of course.”

Johnny Storm

Grinning when you tell him. “Pfft. Horror? Babe, I’m flame-proof.”

Smug at first, loudly mocking the movie.

Then a REALLY good scare hits and he yells and popcorn goes flying.

“I’m still not scared! Just startled!”

Whispers in your ear, “We should do scarier things after this, yeah?”

[celuere]

hopefully we don‘t have no babies.

pt.2 of kiss it, bit it, can i fit it?

pairing: arlecchino x fem!reader

context: she is navigating you with slow and gentle steps (at first) through new found territory (aka sesbian lex)

cw: modern au, experienced dilf!arle, implied age gap (reader is in mid/late twenties), she yaps you an ear off about her spiders, pet names, praising, arle teaches you how to properly finger yourself ngh, mirrors, voyeurism, strap-on, rough sex, dumbification, arle is called peruere

word count: 3.8k

art credits: saditstic beauty: side story a

birthday special for you guys now WHERE are my presents. also thank you to angel and @angelic--kitty who more or less inspired me for this continuation ngh. i have to be honest, i outdid myself with this one. have with over 3k words of sesbian lex.

„are you certain you don‘t want to feed her? she is quite tame for her species.“

you watched the eight-legged creature crawl over her tatted skin in sheer horror.

how did she come up with the name „bambi“ for this monster of a spider?

„i-i‘m pretty certain. i‘d rather just… watch you feed her from a safe distance…!“, taking a step back from the woman and her…. pet. well, one of her various pets. 

you almost died of heart failure the moment you stepped foot into the entomologist‘s basement. terrariums lined up against the walls, everywhere. there had to be at least twenty of the damned creatures here. and today happened to be feeding day so you got to watch your date hand-feed them one by one. and of course, she didn’t leave out any introductions nor did she spare you the details of the individual species.

„this beauty is called a cyriopagopus lividus or rather a cobalt blue tarantula. they‘re known for their extraordinary blue coat and got often mixed up with the omothymus violaceopes even though they differentiate quite a lot from each other in my opinion. from size, color up to their natural habitat and attitude, they could not be more different. this one is actually a bit lively for her species-“ as if the damned thing seemed to understand her word for word, it took off from her palm and rushed up her arm where it abruptly stopped right on her shoulder, „my, the name freminet gave you really does suit you, speedy…“

yet your heart was threatening to beat out of your chest, not because of the sudden scare. rather because she just seemed so… different to you… how skilled she was handling the spiders to her barely lacking knowledge about each and every species she collected over the years. she seemed like a totally different person in that moment. and quite frankly- nothing turned you on more than watching those inked hands putting the haired monster back into its enclosure.

„how come you are so fond of them…?“

you almost regretted your question immediately at the way she mustered you all of a sudden. hesitant. as if she was weighing her options for the unknown. 

„i… i‘m sorry if that was too personal… you don‘t have to tell me if you don‘t feel comfortable with sharing that information with me…!“, you stammered as you tried lifting up the blanket of unease covering your heart. yet, peruere merely shook her head before guiding you out of her basement, a hand resting on your lower back when you walked up the stairs.

„i am not uncomfortable… not with you. it‘s just… it is not exactly the happiest story. it wouldn‘t be in my best interest to ruin tonight’s mood.“, she flashed you one of her rare smiles, but something sad clung to the way her eyes stared into yours.

you‘ve only been seeing each other for a good two months now, none of you dared to breach the topic of your past yet, her children had still to make your acquaintance, too. however, peruere showed great effort. daily phone calls, occasional dinner dates, randomly picking you up from your workplace whenever her schedule allowed it. she was truly, truly interested in you. and that fact caused your stomach to hit one cartwheel after the other.

who expected the 38-year old woman to still be so full of love? love she wants to share with you. 

„fine… another time then.“, you mirrored her soft expression, not wanting to pressure her any further about this topic. 

peruere could feel something in her ribcage tighten at the sight of you. goodness, you brought out a side in her that she didn‘t even know still existed in the first place. you made her feel young again. and she loved you for it.

she hadn‘t loved in a long time. 

„it is way past midnight already… do you still want to stay the night or do you want me to drive you back home?“, a tattooed hand came up to gently tuck a few lost hair strands back behind your ear.

with her children staying at certain ginger uncle‘s house tonight, the night belonged to you. and only you.

„well… what would you prefer? please, be honest… i wouldn‘t mind either options.“, instinctively you leaned into her warm palm, letting her thumb caress your soft skin as if it were the last time.

she looked like the moon on a lonely night yet her touch equaled the feeling of being kissed by the sun itself. warm. trusted. gentle. 

„i‘d love for you to stay the night…“, and so you did.

when you walked into her bedroom for the first time after going through your evening routine in her bathroom beforehand, you didn’t know what to expect. however, you weren‘t surprised, nor disappointed. 

the theme of the room was kept in a gentle dim light, a king-sized bed with simple white-black bedding was resting in the middle of the room. other than that the only things you could spot was a closet, a mirror and two nightstands. if compared to her kids rooms you‘d realize her own little abode is significantly smaller, probably because she doesn’t see a good point in taking up a lot of space which she only frequents for precisely one thing: sleeping. and something else.

otherwise it looked spotless. not a single corn of dust in sight. the sheets were laying neatly folded on top of the mattress and you could make out the soft scent of a room freshener clinging to the air.

„i apologize if my bedroom seems to not meet your expectations… i like to keep things simple.“, with her back turned to you, peruere opened her closet to fish some new sleepwear out for herself. 

but you were too focused. too focused on the fact that she was standing half-naked before you. her back muscles evidence of a strict diet and years of exercise. and you could spot three names imprinted underneath her right shoulder.

Lyney & Lynette 02.02

Freminet 09.24.

something in your chest tightened at the sight of her kid‘s names tattooed onto her skin. she really loved those rascals with her entire being even if they weren’t hers by blood, they will always be a part of her.

„do you have sleepwear to change into?“

„oh, yes i do, but thank you…“, you watch her put on a plain black shirt and a pair of red-black checked pants and now you are convinced. she looks handsome in literally anything.

the older woman didn’t expect a lot when she turned around but who would’ve thought seeing her sweet date in a tight tanktop and some shorts would blow her fucking mind. you weren’t even wearing anything sexual, yet her thoughts ran rampage inside her head while she tried to make an effort to avoid looking at anything else other than your face.

„so… ready for bed?“

„mhm… gosh, look at that pretty pussy…“

it took the two of you not even five minutes until the first layers of clothes came off.

which happened to be your shorts and panties. you were laying underneath her with spread legs and your own fingers working up and down your cunt, you wanted to give her a show.

but the longer you tried pleasuring yourself, the bigger the frown on peruere‘s face got.

the woman had precisely one question on her mind: did someone ever teach you how to properly finger yourself? you might as well be trying your luck at a lottery ticket the way your fingers… fumbled your folds. you weren‘t even wet enough when you tried to insert your index- and middle-finger.

„stop right there.“

„but-“

„stop. you will only end up hurting yourself.“, crimson eyes watched you remove your hand from your cunt as you tried masking the utter humiliation she just exposed you to.

„don‘t look away.“, with her hand grabbing your chin, she moved your head back to face her directly, „did someone ever teach you how to properly pleasure yourself?“

„h-huh? what do you mean?“

„all the men you have been with before, did they ever bother to finger you correctly or at least show you how to do it yourself?“, your ribcage is suddenly too small for your lungs at the vulgar words she‘s using.

„i… no… n-not that i remember… why are you asking?“

she looked at you for a few seconds before sighing and scooting back, tugging you up by your hand, „how am i supposed to sleep knowing such a pretty girl can‘t even get off all by herself… come here.“, she patted the space between her legs.

just what did she want to do?

when obliged to her request it almost immediately clicked when you were met with the reflection in front of you.

you were sat before a mirror. in her lap. butt-naked.

„y-you want to show me…“

„dear me, so smart… that is exactly what i want to do.“, peruere grabbed you by the plush of your right thigh before pulling your leg over her own and spreading you open in the process.

„so, here‘s how things will operate from here.“, she wasted no time and used her two fingers to spread your cunt open, „i will first give you a little… demonstration… and then it is your turn. how does that sound, hm?“

„th-that sounds humiliating, if i am being honest…“

„it isn‘t. at all. i am not offering this to make fun of you. please don‘t get me wrong, doll. i just want you to know how to take care of yourself the next time we‘re on a phone call.“, she let her lips ghost over the sensitive skin of your neck, your pussy now significantly more slick and your clit aching.

oh, that phone call. just thinking about it caused you to slightly whimper.

„i… o-okay fine… show me…“

„first of all you need to look. not at your face or mine, i need you to observe your pussy when i‘m demonstrating. understood?“, her voice had something stern in it. something that shouldn‘t be allowed to be so incredibly hot.

„understood…“

„good girl. now, first of all, you want to take your middle- and ring finger, that way it is easier for you to get as deep as possible when you are using them on yourself. got it so far?“, she waited for your nod before continuing.

„the main reason why i stopped you earlier was because you were way, way too dry. you need to be slick enough to easily wet your fingers in order for them to slide in with little to no problems. sex or masturbation is never supposed to hurt. if it does you are doing something wrong.“, her expression changed into something softer the more nervous you became by watching her fingertips circle over your sensitive clit, „shhhhh… just follow my fingers, look at how wet you are getting by just a few rubs to your clit…“, using those same fingers to spread you open by your folds. the whimper found its way over your lips all on itself.

„a-ah… th-this is embarrassing, peruere…“, you mumbled before turning your head away once again. 

but the entomologist wasn‘t having it.

„if you can send me whole videos of you bouncing your pussy on a vibrator, you can also watch me fingering you in a mirror.“, she whispered almost dangerously low into your ear, her tone laced with something sinister that caused your body to grow hot… and your cunt to painfully clench around nothing.

„let me propose an offer.“, just then, her fingertips slowly sneaked their way into your slit, „if you sit through this lesson without any more complaining and manage to properly get off on your own fingers… there‘s a little reward waiting for you… alright?“, her voice came out silky, reduced to a soft pur as she hummed, pleased to find your eyes fixed back onto the wet mess between your legs.

„a-alright…“, your breathing became heavier the deeper her fingers pushed in until she was knuckles-deep inside your warmth.

„good girl. feel that?“, slowly she began to feel up your walls that were gripping onto her so tightly. peruere only chuckled, „missed me, hm?“

„hah… hngh… o-of course i did…“, you said, as you pressed yourself more into her chest. she felt so warm. so comfortable. the faint note of her usual cologne still clung to her but it lit up a flame of desire inside of you that you only ever experienced with her.

„adorable… we have several options now. you could start to move your hand back and forth…“, she demonstrated by pumping her fingers slowly in and out of you, drawing a moan from you in the process, „or curl up your fingers and search for your g-spot. it usually sits two to three inches behind your vaginal opening, right…“, electricity suddenly shoots down your spine as her two fingertips delicately press and rub into your spot, „…here.“

„o-oh archons-! h-how-?!“, you clenched the fabric of her pants in your hand as she continued to massage the sensitive spot inside of you with ease.

„after knowledge comes experience, darling. you could also combine both methods and just…“, she had you squirming around in her lap by the first pump of her fingers, curling them up each time she slid them back into your hole, „…fingerfuck yourself however you please. you can vary the pace, the motions, just whatever feels better to you.“

something, something with motions… speed… how did she expect you to pay attention with her fingers showing you what heaven truly looked like?

you were so focused on these experienced fingers working their way inside your pussy that you didn‘t even process her next words.

„and now it is your turn, sweetheart.“, the whine you let out when she retreated almost brought the older woman to her knees. 

you were just too cute in her lap. cute and unfucked. too unfucked for her liking.

„m-my turn…?“

„how am i supposed to know that my little lesson bore any fruits without a test? come on. make good use of those fingers now and pleasure yourself.“, her voice was dripping with professionalism, as if she were talking to a student.

despite the humiliation being still very much present, you obliged to her demand without as much as a simple nod. moving your fingers down, carefully sliding them through your wetness, „a-and what about my r-reward…?“

crimson eyes were fixated on the way you circled your clit in the reflection of the mirror before she leaned back, supporting herself on the mattress with her arms, „so impatient… i will only properly reward you once you manage to get off. on your own. after all, i don‘t reward slackers.“

archons, she was strict.

but did her tone only add further to the heat resting between your thighs?

fuck, it did.

and you needed that strap-on badly.

so you watched her expression falter for the slightest moment when you shoved your fingers back inside your warmth and they went in so easily. you gasped at how smoothly they went inside you, how welcoming you were compared to a few minutes ago, that you leaned your head back onto her shoulder when you started to search for your spot.

easier said than done.

„i… i-i can‘t i find it, peruere…“

„you can, angel. it should sit right above your fingertips now. come on, we don‘t give up so easily here. think about your reward…“

she didn‘t tell you that she will still pound your cute pussy senseless, even if you fail. 

she just won‘t be as gentle with you.

„i-i don‘t have as much experience a-as you do…“, your voice trembled with your growing frustration when you missed it yet again. 

„darling, i‘m a whole decade older than you. i assure you we are getting-“, peruere watched your legs jolt as a moan rung through the bedroom, „…there. my, was that so hard now?“, a knowing smirk played around her lips as she watched you fall apart in her lap. all on your own.

this was different. so much different from someone else doing the work, it was even slightly better than that. you knew what motion felt the best already, the pace you wanted to set and quite honestly- you regretted not looking into your own pleasure like this way sooner. but having a 38 year old overworked woman lead you to the right path… oh, what a wonderful world you were living in.

your orgasm felt like warm hug embracing you, washing gently over you but leaving you nonetheless breathless, aching for more.

„my, look at that… aren‘t you just the sweetest little thing…?“, she didn‘t wait for a reply when she moved over to her nightstand and fished out… her very own strap-on.

„h-huh…?“

„what? don‘t tell me you changed your mind about the reward, doll…“, and truth was that she just couldn‘t wait any longer to fuck you into the mattress. with how needy your eyes were still looking at her, the way you rubbed your slightly trembling thighs together, your fingers already pulled out but the hand was still resting between them.

like a little lamb waiting for its sacrifice.

and she needed you. bad. she wanted to make up for the years you wasted with the wrong partners, showing you what you‘ve been missing out on your entire life.

her.

„n-no no! i-i didn‘t change my mind at all-!“, you crawled towards her side of the bed where she was currently standing when she started buckling up her fake dick.

the sight of you kneeling before her on the bed, tits pressed together in that skimpy top of yours forced her to wet her lips. 

you will be the end of her.

„lay back. legs spread. mhm, just like that.“, she had to suppress a groan when you exposed your soaked pussy to her eyes once again. the way she could make out your nervous breathing by how fast your chest rose and fell back down. you were excited.

„good girl. now show off that pretty cunt to me.“, her throat visibly moved when you spread your folds open for her once more. one moment she was standing, the next she dropped to her knees, hungry lips roaming over your warmth, a tongue greedily lapping up your juices as muffled groans filled the tense bedroom air.

it was almost a reflex when your hand found home between her hair strands, pushing her further into you when you couldn’t stop the sounds of pure ecstasy any longer.

yet, peruere didn‘t devote her mouth to your pussy much longer, already leaving a hot trail of messy kisses up to your tummy, tattooed hands working the fabric of your top over your tits, giving them both a treatment consisting of biting your nipple and making sure to cover those beautiful girls in lovebites beyond recognition.

„o-oh god- fuuuuck… p-please…!“, you whined, whimpered, whatever. hands tracing the outlines of her trained biceps when she fucking finally towered over you, lips swollen from treating your body like a temple, crimson eyes dark with nothing else other than carnal desire.

„you want me? you want my cock inside that tight pussy of yours, hm?“, she purred as she grabbed your right leg and placing it over her shoulder when you felt her rubbing the shaft through your slickness.

the way you shook your head up and down like a total maniac was all she needed. 

„then you shall have me.“

often peruere didn‘t look like she was approaching the 40 years mark.

but those hips made sure to remind you of it yet again. slamming so perfectly into you, her cock settling each and every time against your cervix when she bottoms out, like a puzzle piece falling into place.

she swore she could feel you gripping onto the silicone, how you sucked her in as if you were about to starve and despite not even being penetrated sexually herself- she was groaning from the deepest pits of her throat. not caring about your juices staining the sheets underneath you or her sleeping pants.

„p-peruere…!! p-peru-!!“, you mewled in the sweetest tone as you grabbed into the sheets until your knuckles turned white, tears forming in the corner of your eyes from how deep she was penetrating you from the inside.

„all those before me, did they ever fuck you as good as me? did they ever have you screaming over their cock like this, hm?“, the both of you overheard the sound of the bed creaking underneath her almost animalistic pace if it weren‘t for your skin slapping together. you could almost mistake it for a round of applause.

however, your answer was clear.

„n-no-! th-they didn‘t- Hngh!!“, your spine melted into a beautiful arch when she angled her hips to go after that one certain spot, stars already dangling around your vision from how well she was fucking you.

not even your climax stopped her. it only further motivated her to press your legs up until your knees were almost touching your ears so she could rut as deeply as possibly into you.

she hated how she couldn‘t get pregnant more than anything else right now. nobody ever made her feel this wanted as you in that moment. how you begged for her, pleading for salvation in form of her cock and what not. you wanted her fuck you into this mattress for eternity, to turn you into her own personal doll to play with.

„mine… mine, all mine…“, giving into the urge to kiss you stupid almost made her cum herself. the moans that were swallowed by her own lips, your arms snaking around her neck to keep her pressed against your body as she held your face in her hands as if you were but a precious diamond she needed to be careful with. a strong contradict to how she was plowing into you and how strongly the room smelled of sex.

and if your place was underneath her with seven inches filling you up, then so be it.

your world almost shattered after yet another exhilarating high when she pulled out, not even the slightest hint of her being out of breath yet.

„don‘t look at me like that, sweetheart. i‘m not even remotely done with you yet.“, her biceps strained as she picked you up as if you were nothing but lightweight to her before flipping you over on your stomach, „hips up.“, a hand patted the fat of your hips and you obliged more than happily.

a pillow was placed underneath you and you also dragged another one over to rest your head on. you knew she was about to rock your whole world.

„comfortable?“

„m-mhm…“

„then hold on tight.“

[lostintransist]

Thoughts on Divorcing John Price?

r/AmItheAsshole

TL;DR I got married to escape my parents and now 10+ years in I think I want a divorce.

How did I end up here? Ten-plus years into a marriage I don’t actually think I wanted and I’m only now starting to piece everything together. I was too young to get married. Too damn young. But thanks to the religious trauma and my parents (just assume I am throwing up a peace sign and sticking my tongue out one side of my mouth at this point because what the hell else am I supposed to do?) I took the only out I saw. That looked like one [Redacted] John [Redacted].

My parents couldn’t say shit about my marrying so fast as they did it themselves. So six months in and me, John, my parents, and the judge made it official. I was Mrs. John [Redacted]. God, I hate how we let men sit atop everything. Why couldn’t I make him take my name? I mean…my father’s name. Damn. See what I mean?

We had a good honeymoon I think? A solid week of traveling and having fun together. Once we were home though things changed; he didn’t start hitting me or anything. God forbid. The man would have woken in a box on the way to the hospital and he knew it. Much as he wanted a “traditional” wife he picked me knowing I kowtow to no one and nothing.

That might have been the start of the problems actually. He was gone so much that I set everything up in every flat he moved us to. And what did every flat reflect? Me. As much as John let me in he barred me out with the same fervor I imagine Bluebeard guarded his bodies. I get it though, we both had issues from childhood we had yet to unpack or quite frankly address in ourselves let alone our marriage. I’m ashamed it took me nearly twelve years to realize the reason I said yes to the marriage proposal was because I was truly scared I would never escape my childhood hell any other way.

Fuck. How does one go about planning to blow up one’s life and walk away intact?

We have kids, John and I. Three of them and I love them so much that if I ever started life over I would make all the same choices to meet them again. It’s not much of a change really, if I have full custody of them, John is hardly ever home as is. They love their father though. I wonder if I ever did. Love him, I mean.

God, I don’t know how I got here. When he leaves the only changes will be to his side of the bed and the closet. There is me everywhere else. He never fought me on it though, and would never make a decision about changing anything and actually follow through. It was like all of his choices got used up at work and when he got home all he had was a yearning for me to fix it.

The last straw shouldn’t have been what it was.

We had a good holiday together, going into the mountains and hiking and playing in creeks with our kids. I showered with our daughter, cleaning us both, and then asked him to handle cleaning the boys. It shouldn’t have been a problem. Shampoo and condition their hair and scrub their bodies then toss them in towels and clothes.

One of our boys has long hair, kiddo hates the sound of clippers and lets me brush and wash it so I don’t care that it grows. John complains that it gets everywhere and threatens to cut it off. I hate that it would somehow become my responsibility to handle if he ever did follow through. When I catch sight of this boy, clean from the bath I coax him into the bathroom to brush his hair. And what do I find? Un-fucking-washed hair.

“John? Did you wash his hair?”

A breath of silence, the hesitation slightly longer than it should be.

“I think you know the answer to that,” comes his gruff reply.

Motherfucker! If the man would fight with me instead of putting on his work face and letting the rage in my eyes simmer until all that is left is coals I might feel better. But no. I simply order the child to strip and get back in the shower so I can wash his hair. Now both of us are annoyed with John’s inability to follow through on the full process of cleaning a child. He made me lunch as an ‘apology’. I would rather he used his words than assume I understand that he did this kindness for me to show he was sorry.

It’s like the dishes all over again. Fucker can’t seem to wash the hand wash items and lets them sit until I am ready to explode and throw them into the street but won’t stop using them. If he needs them to make lunch though? No problem, he will clean the single one he is going to dirty again.

I can’t explain this to anyone though. I can’t say ‘I don’t want to be married anymore. Not for any particular reason, but I keep hoping that when the doorbell rings it’s the military in full dress coming to tell me of my husband’s death so I can move on with my life and be free.’ Yeah because that is something that will absolutely make sense to everyone I tell.

This is a head-in-hand kind of thought. What a fucking awful person I must be for my brain to assume that there is no way out other than death and wish it, even benignly, on the father of my children. God, I must be as horrible a person as I suspected. Maybe I can wait until our youngest is in school and I am back to work? I have been keeping a small part-time job so as to never fully leave the job market but even if I use all of it to pay off our shared debt other than the house it would take years to settle everything.

Would John even fight me on this? I’ve heard whispers that he might be more than friendly with some of the men he works with. Rumors get around on base, some men like their wives and share more than parenting duties with them.

I guess this is all I have to say about this for now.

So all that said AITA for wanting to divorce my husband?

Masterlist

[fuckyeahchinesefashion]

Question: do Chinese school uniforms also have specific shoes you must buy, down to brand/style? Where I am (in the west, Texas) uniform schools just give you a general guide (i.e. brown loafers) and you can get whatever is available.

Hello there thank you for the question, it's an interesting one! In China, public schools are relatively lenient when it comes to shoe requirements. They usually don’t specify particular brands or styles, just basic guidelines like "sneakers"(canvas shoes included) or "running shoes," and students can buy them on their own. School rules don’t explicitly state that students must wear sneakers daily, but since school uniforms are typically sportswear, sneakers are just the natural choice. So yeah that's pretty much exactly how it is, just like you said. If a student showed up in high heels with their tracksuit, people would probably wonder if they were, emm, under too much academic stress and there’s no way they are allowed to attend the flag-raising ceremony on monday like that, right...the homeroom teacher would definitely show concern. (High heels would only be allowed for special events, like ceremonies where the etiquette team needs to dress formally - say, with a prom dress or qipao but no one wears them normally.)

That said, some public, private and international schools might have more detailed rules, e.g. requiring dress shoes if they have blazers and pleated skirts, but these schools include them in the uniform package, no need for parents to buy specific brands separately. Overall, China’s uniform policies tend to be more flexible with footwear than with clothing. Of course, for certain occasions like ceremonies they might require black or brown loafers or solid white athletic shoes without any markings. During military training, some schools might mandate wearing the issued camouflage shoes, but most just ask for sneakers.

As for sneaker styles, most students opt for affordable, comfortable, and practical brands, though a few wealthier families might buy their kids expensive sneakers but that’s the exception. Homeroom teachers discourage material competition (like over shoes or electronics) to maintain a healthy class atmosphere. Also it would be absolutely unthinkable in China for parents to spend hundreds of pounds on a full school uniform set, like what's required by private schools in the UK.

I've seen international netizens getting curious about the military training itself on xiaohongshu, however many of them end up with some odd notions about high school and college military training in China. (Just a random thought, my brain jumps around haha)

Tbh military training is kind of just a standard procedure? School administrators and education bureau officials(they are basically politicians) need to look like they’re doing something impressive, so they came up with this thing. Nowadays, it’s mostly just making students march in formation, stand at attention, practice goose-stepping, and then do a final performance where they parade past a stage, kinda mimicking an actual military review. It's essentially a perfunctory, performative routine. Some even incorporate synchronized formations like those wave patterns you saw at the Beijing Olympics, just for show.

The higher-ups are scared of accidents and don’t wanna take responsibility, so they usually don’t make students do anything beyond that. But, of course, there are always some overzealous leaders who might have the instructors teach basic military stuff, like handling rifles(no bullets of course), though that’s pretty rare now.

In high school they actually dragged us to a real military base. We stayed in this camp next to the barracks, in the middle of freaking nowhere. The showers were those open public ones, no doors or anything, and the bunk beds were so vertical, I was scared I’d roll off in my sleep. And then they took us to a shooting range to fire guns??? I can't?? Though later we discovered that unmarked complex across the street from our high school with zero signage was actually one of the broad regional theater command HQ. Hehe funny how things turn out... but let's not dwell on that because that shit isn't shown on any map or social media. Ignore my ramble so our high school was in some kind of "quality education" pilot program, and the higher-ups were probably just showing off for their superiors.

In college, though, the training was all on campus -just the usual marching and formations. No way they’d make us attend classes on top of that, we’d have died from exhaustion. So the rest of the time was basically free, and somehow my friend and I ended up giving fortune-telling sessions to girls with I Ching Divination lmao?? (Since the guys and girls were separated -different squads and all.) Also if someone have pre-existing conditions, they're exempt from military training.

Tangent over sorry. Many top-tier schools in big cities have adopted a more comprehensive uniform system over the last 10-15 years, i.e., formal wear for official occasions paired with sportswear (with summer/winter variations and layered combinations). It's increasingly common to see students wearing blazers trousers and skirts for formal occasions. There are many photos as visual references: most of them are current uniforms. Third and second to last row are 2000s designs from uniform factories -back then, sailor-style uniforms were common. As physical fitness tests got stricter and academic pressure increased, schools switched to sportswear; last row shows a girls' school uniform from the Republic of China era, a classic hybrid style.

[forwards-beckon-rebound]

jason todd with a partner who’s afraid of guns

ft. gn!reader, mentions of guns (obviously), other weapons, potential home break ins, just jason being a little paranoid but we love him for that anyways

i imagine he would already have his vigilante and personal life very separate (he's just a guy :( who wants some normalcy and domesticity)

so i don't really imagine him letting his partner see much of his red hood persona

like he's not exactly bringing you to fights or anything even remotely dangerous

so, knock on wood, you’ll never have to see him actually shoot anybody, but he will still try to find ways to keep you safe when he’s not there

probably soooo very very protective of you, like even if he was practically in love with you, would hesitate to start a relationship until he's sure that his enemies won't have a way to use you against him

he's going to like one safe house to store his stuff and then probably another one just to throw people off of his tracks before he heads to your place

i think if his partner wasn't afraid of him guns at home, like is just scared of handling them, he would probably have one on him when he's going home

to protect himself because he could be attacked anywhere and also in case something happens at home (his worst nightmare is walking home to an empty apartment when he knows you should be home and in bed)

and he normally would have a stash of weapons in the house, including guns, in case either of you have to defend yourselves

like preferablyyyyyyy he teaches you the basics like how to load a gun, turn the safety on and off, and shoot, but if not there are plenty of other weapons to choose from

and he’ll let you know where they all are (it’s not hard, like you’ll probably run into a few on accident throughout the day anyways) and will tell you where the guns are so you can avoid them if you so wish (he’ll probably have them in case he’s home and needs them though)

super paranoid guy but considering everything he's been through and how many people he's antagonized in gotham, makes sense

however, if his partner is afraid of even having them lying around, he's definitely willing to make some changes. he still uses them while he's fighting, but subconsciously, he might be less likely to reach for them

he's not bringing any guns home (probably just settle for some knives, idk why but he seems like he would steal batarangs for funsies so he might have some on hand)

like he’ll drop off his guns when he gets to one of his safe houses and then arm himself to the moon with other stuff (sorry again i fear he is a little paranoid but like it’s understandable)

as far as weapons in the house...i think he'll still have a few guns, just in case, but he'll make sure it's not somewhere you could easily find them, like if you guys both have your own offices then he’ll leave them in his

honestly, for your peace of mind, he probably won't tell you the exact location, just lets you know that there are a few for life or death situations (unless you ask for the location, in which case he's more than happy to tell you)

so many other weapons though. i genuinely don't think he'd compromise too much on that one. again, if you don't like sharp objects or anything like that, at the very least, he is putting pepper spray in every room and a metal baseball bat

and probably some flares, smoke bombs, nonlethal stuff so you can run to safety if you don't want to deal with the assailant head-on, but best believe you’ll know how to use all of them very well

and there’s always self defence moves, although i think he prays that you never have to get to that point

why am i imagining jason practicing escape routes with you from different places in your apartment like it's some sort of fire drill

“okay pretend i’m the attacker and i come in through the window with a knife while you’re washing the dishes. what are you going to do?”

“cry?”

“no, sweetheart, remember, if you’re in the kitchen and they don’t have any long distance weapons then you go with escape plan C.”

“bitch how tf am i supposed to remember all of the plans.”

HE DOES IT OUT OF LOVE

will actually stress tf out if you don’t do it so uhhhhhhhhh yeah i’d start studying

will make you practice it every once in a while just to keep it fresh

and it’ll be random too because “crime doesn’t give you a heads up in gotham”

on the plus side if you have any weird requests he’ll probably feel bad and do them

like if you want fresh flowers in the house at all times? babe, he was going to do that anyways. onlt the best for you

you want to decorate the house in whatever style you like? here’s his card (being a crime lord does make good money)

doesn’t matter if he likes it or not, it’s only fair. you get to decorate your place with cute throw pillows, he gets to hide a few daggers under the sofa, same difference

or like if you want his location at all times? and hourly check ups?

honestly, he’s touched that you care about his safety as much as he cares about yours. he’ll make sure it’s encrypted so nobody can hack into your phone and see that, but he’s more than willing to whip out his phone in chasing down some villain to tell you he’s gonna be late for dinner or whatever

guys, at the end of the day, he just really loves and cares for his partner, and he'll do whatever makes you the safest and most comfortable

he has some…interesting habits but it’s all to make sure you stay safe

and he makes up for it by bringing home little trinkets that remind him of you and planning elaborate date nights and all of that cute stuff to show how much he cares

and who knows, if you still remember escape plan p maybe he’ll have a little treat planned!

[can-youimagine]

Mix Up (Spencer Reid x Reader)

Summary: Spencer sends the wrong note.

TW: adult themes, embarrassment

Word Count: 1499

Masterlist

Everyone in the BAU contributed something to make the team feel like a family. Rossi opened his house and cooked for the team. Morgan and Hotch were always quick to praise a member for their accomplishments. Penelope always made sure that she had treats for anyone who might be having a bad day. You left notes for everyone. After each case, someone got a note, telling them how much you appreciated them and their contributions. 

Last week, Hotch got a note. He tucked it into his bag with a smile before making sure to thank you and tell you how much you are appreciated on the team. 

Today, it was Spencer’s turn to receive a note. The two of you had roomed together for this case, and you saw how much of a toll it took on him. He shouldn’t say he is surprised to see a note on his desk, but he is.

Spencer,

I can’t imagine how difficult this case was for you. You don’t have to be brave all the time, y’know. It’s okay for you to be scared. You are human, even if you know more than a computer. I am so proud of the work you accomplished and more than grateful for it. Know that I am proud of you, always. 

You are the person I can trust with anything. You are the only member of the team who I worry about, even when we’re not out on a case. Not because I think you can’t handle yourself but because I know you’re worrying about all of us. Please, don’t let me be the cause of any of your stress. 

I wish I could keep writing, but I can barely keep my eyes open.

With love,

(Y/N).

He smiles widely at the note, tucking it into his bag before anyone else has a chance to see it. After all, you didn’t write it for anyone else. You wrote it for him. You thought of him outside the case, and you thought that you wanted to make him feel good. The more he thinks about it, the more light-headed he becomes. He heads to the kitchenette, eager to get a cup of coffee and hide his growing blush. 

You’ve left him five notes in the last year. Even if he didn’t have an eidetic memory, he is certain he would have each word memorized. He’s memorized every interaction you’ve had with them. Though, he knows these memories aren’t quite perfect. Every time a memory is retrieved, it becomes altered, and he has replayed every memory more times than he can count. He’s replayed them, he’s altered them, he’s even added to them. 

If he could bring you just a fraction of the joy that you bring him, he would be able to rest easy. The way his heart flips every time he gets a note from you gives him the perfect idea of how to please you.

When he gets home, he sits at his desk, trying to come up with something to say to you, but nothing feels right. How is he supposed to tell you how much you mean to him without telling you just how much you mean to him? Finally, he picks up his pen, deciding that if he writes a draft of what he wants to say first, he’ll be able to write what he should say.

(Y/N),

You are more appreciated than you know. I love you more than you know. Yes, this case was hard for me, but the biggest challenge was sharing a room with you. It’s always tough to sleep on cases, but how am I supposed to get any sleep when I’m only a few feet from you? When, if you’d let me, I’d be able to sleep in your arms? When I’d be able to touch you, kiss you, fuck you?

God, it’s all I could think about. I shouldn’t even tell you what I was thinking. It’s not even just what I was thinking when we were on the case. I think about you constantly. I think of how kind you are, how much praise you give. I can’t help but wonder if you would receive praise just as well. If, when I tell you that you were made for my cock, you would fall apart. If I could, I would give you all the praise in the world just to see you break, watch you come undone, on my cock, on my fingers, on my tongue.

I know you would taste incredible. What I wouldn’t give to get even a taste. Though, I know I wouldn’t be able to stop at just a taste. I’d have to be selfish, and I know you wouldn’t complain.

Spencer slides his chair away from his desk. He quickly folds the paper and sets it aside. Now that that’s done, he gets to work on his actual letter. A much tamer, much safer for work, much friendlier letter that lets you know that you are appreciated.

Again, he folds the note, writing your name on the outside, and sets it aside. 

When he leaves in the morning, he grabs the note off his desk, tucking it into his bag. He frowns, noticing that your car is already in the garage. He had hoped that he could leave the note on your desk as a surprise, but there’s no doubt that you’re already working on your files. He decides that he’ll drop it on your desk as he walks by then hide in the breakroom while you read it.

It’s not that he’s embarrassed by what he said, and he meant every word. It just feels like an invasion of privacy to watch you, and he’s not sure how he would be able to carry on with the day if he saw even the hint of a frown on your face.

The elevator opens, and he sets his plan into motion. He unpacks his bag, sliding the note into his hand before walking past your desk. 

“Spencer, you dropped something,” you call, but he keeps walking, and out of the corner of his eye, he watches you open the note. That’s when he realizes his mistake. Your name is nowhere on the back of the paper. He panics but keeps walking. What is he supposed to say? “Sorry, that actually isn’t meant for you, I mean it is, but you definitely should not be reading that, in a completely normal not creepy way.”?

He focuses on his coffee, He wishes the ground would open up and swallow him whole. If hwatching the sugar dissolve. He’s lucky, he’ll be able to hide in here all day and never have to look at you again.

Spencer Reid is very rarely at a loss for words. He can almost always come up with something to say. Now, as he walks back into the bullpen, he has no clue what he can say to you. 

It appears that he doesn’t have to. You aren’t at your desk anymore, much to Spencer’s relief. He turns his focus to the papers in front of him. Files that normally wouldn’t take him more than ten minutes are taking almost an hour. He doesn’t look up until he hears a door open.

Hotch’s office door.

He closes his eyes, praying there isn’t a case already. He doesn’t hear Hotch. Instead, he hears footsteps walk down the stairs and into the bullpen. Hesitantly, he opens his eyes. You are getting settled at your desk.

No, no, no, no, no.

You did not go to Hotch after reading his note. You couldn’t have. You would have talked to him before you got him fired, right?

“What was that about?” Emily asks you. You turn to answer, and Spencer is trying to listen, but Morgan grabs his attention first.

“What’s with you?”

“What do you mean?”

Morgan rolls his eyes. “I’m finishing these files faster than you.”

Spencer shrugs. “I’m just distracted, that’s all.”

“Hey, you know we’re here for you, right?”

“I know,” he answers, looking back at the file. 

The day continues without you talking to him, and he sure as hell isn’t going to talk to you. Since Hotch hasn’t come down to fire him, Spencer assumes that his job is safe.

You get up around noon, stretching as you do. You grab your bag, a piece of paper between your fingers. You let it fall as you walk passed his desk. Spencer quickly picks it up, unfolding it.

Spencer,

Buy me dinner, and I’ll make sure you get something sweet.

He rereads the sentence over and over again. He’s convinced it’s some sort of joke, but he holds onto the hope that it isn’t and that he actually hasn’t fucked this up beyond belief.

When you come back, you glance at him. If he wasn’t a profiler, he’s not sure he would’ve caught it, but you seem nervous. He smiles to himself. 

[patheticpoems]

STOP STRESSING

you're getting wrinkles

some of you are stress addicts. you'll spend more time stressing about manifestation than you do actually committing to your desires. Aren't you sick of it? You've been nonstop overthinking, you're having doubts and even though you try to correct them they just won't won't away?

Well, I'm gonna tell you how to shut out all that stress; How to make it go away.

IDENTIFYING STRESS

Let's start here. Yes, you may already know what stress is but I didn't ask, I'm covering it regardless! Stress is that feeling you may get when your circumstances are clamping in on you, whether it be due to difficult treatment, responsibilities, time crunches, or perceiving the opposite occurring to you, it can cause you to start worrying, "am I doing this right?", "why isn't it working?" You wonder and you anxiously correct it because ack! God forbid you have a bad thought! You can't waver even though you only assume it's a thing because some blogger was sharing their own personal opinion!!!

I listed some causes for stress and maybe yours are different, however, what is important for us to do now is to identify where it stems from.

TREATING YOUR STRESS

METHOD I.

Knowing the cause of our stress means we can deal with the solution head-on. So, let us begin. Whenever you start stressing, I want you to STAR! Stop, Think, Act, Reaffirm! You will pause, ask yourself why do you think/feel the way you do? From one question ask another, keep digging deeper.

"I feel nervous > why? > because I don't know if things will work out > why wouldn't they? > because what if it just doesn't work for me specifically?"

And then, act accordingly! "

"> why wouldn't it work for me specifically if its a law? > maybe I'm exempt- > its a universal law, I can't be. I'm just stressing because I'm scared, there isn't any logic to it!"

Reaffirm that what you think doesn't hold power over you and doesn't hold any water. Remind yourself who you are.

"I'm the sole operant power and there is no such thing as not working because I already have it!"

Once you start getting used to treating your stress that way it helps you see the doubts you have as less serious.

METHOD II.

Now, another way to deal with stress is always remembering to think in despite (of). When you're having trouble with hard circumstances that you just can't ignore and are too overwhelming, this is a way to not let them get you down - a way to remind yourself you aren't tied to these circumstances and this life.

"Despite what I see in my circumstances, I'm still all powerful!"

"Despite how I overthink, everything stems from self!"

It helps to remind yourself that regardless of what you see it doesn't change that you're in power. Remember, everything is a reflection of you, it stems from you, there is no separation.

I'd like to say, it is also good to take a look at ways to cope with anxiety/stress, whether that be a specific activity that calms you down, music, or breathing exercises. It is always important to regulate your own emotions for YOUR well-being. Life is about fulfilling the egos desires and we need to be alright enough to do that!

Stress can be a difficult thing to handle that's why we need to remind ourselves that we have nothing to stress over, that by the end of the day it is our perception. I know that may not be appealing to some people or very difficult to do, but that's why you have to start somewhere to get comfortable with it.

[lavenderhateswritting]

Bruce Wayne x Male Reader

This is me kinda going further in depth on my ideas about Bruce and divorced BatDad link

There has to be something you're not understanding. At least that's what you have to keep telling yourself there has to be something here that doesn't connect that you aren't picking up on. Bruce has a biological child. A biological child who has been alive for less years than you have been married. Bruce cheated on you. Again.

The air in the cave is acrid. The boy. Damian. His name is Damian. Is speaking to Bruce. He's Talia's son because of course he's fucking Talia's son. God.

The world around you feels like its millions of miles away, muffled and unreachable to you. You should have known. Talia had known him long before you had come into the picture and had always been so much more than you could ever be. It wasn't just Talia though it was so many more than Talia and you kept telling yourself that it wasn't true because you just couldn't believe it.

Now there's no denying it. Now there's a child and now you had to make a choice because if you didn't nothing was going to change.

You must have been standing there for too long looking into space floating into a world where your marriage is happy and your husband loyal because Bruce finally walks up to you. He stands in front of you his cowl is down and his eyes have hardened hemselves. He's prepared for the coversation then great.

"You'll have to start the paperwork to get him in school." You finally say. The first thing you've said for 40 mins and for just a second you can see the confusion hits him for just a moment and then its gone. God forbid he shows you any fucking emotion.

"But you probably shouldn't do that before you acclimate him to average people." Your voice is airy like you're a second away from crying.

"And you're gonna need him to do placement tests - "

"Y/N I know you want to talk about this." He's interupting you.

"Because he's probably ahead of his grade and we - "

"Y/N please can we talk about this."

" We don't want him to take grades he doesn't need to. And I am talking about it. I'm telling you what you need to do for your child. You and Talia's child." Your breathe is starting to come out faster as you speak.

"I mean what else could there be to talk about. You, cheating on me. Again. With another woman. I mean do you even like men Bruce cause god knows you love cheating on me with women." Your hands are shaking now. It feels like you've been drenched in cold water.

"That's not important you have another child you need to take care of and unlik the others you can't fall back on me to handle the the civilian aspect." You finally look back into his eyes there's nothing there. Of course.

"Y/N please calm down we're going to talk about this, we're going to get through this, and handle this Damian situation together." He's grabbed your hands now the gloves of his suit means you can't feel him against your skin only the thick sturdy material.

"No, we aren't, you are." His eyes finally show a flash of fear like he understands what's finally happening.

"Y/N please try and be reasonable. You're in shock and I understand why, but you aren't thinking straight you just need to sleep through the night and then we can talk." His hands are griping you tighter like if he lets you go you'll run for the hills. Maybe he's right to be scared.

"Yeah I'll go to sleep and we'll talk about this later beacuse you need to go on patrol and this mission will always be more important than our fucking relationship. And then when I wake up you'll tell me it'll neve happen again and that you're sorry right. Like how you did with Selina, or Viki, or FUCKING TALIA. And then I'm goint to forgive you again and again and again because I love you, but you don't love me, do you Bruce." You hands have stopped shaking this isn't scary anymore. This is necessary for you you need to get out of this relationship or it's going to kill you.

"Of course I love you. I love you more than anything in the world you know this." He actually for once looks sad and isn't that something.

"But you don't love me enough to not cheat on me and I don't blame you. I keep forgiving you so why would you stop. Not this time though let go of me Bruce." His grip on you had gotten tighter and tighter as the conversation continued it was bordering on painful.

"If I let you go will you be here when I come home tonight." He's scared you've managed to scare Batman isn't that something.

"Don't make me lie to you. Don't make me treat you like you treat me." He flinches back like you've slapped him across the face and finally drops your arms. He probably would have perfered it if you had simply smacked him. Violence he understood. Violence was something he was good at.

"Is there anything I can say that will make you still be here when I come home." His voice hitches the smallest amount pushed down as soon as it comes up.

"No, and I think you already know that. I love you Bruce." You turn toward the staircase back up to the manor. You'll need to pack and stay in the penthouse tonight and then in the moring make a plan. You've reached the first step of your climb when Bruce finally speaks again.

"I love you Y/N I promise you I do."

There's no point in turning back so you keep going forward.

[ravenclaws-stuff]

Theodore Nott x reader

Tags: hurt/comfort, hurt in this part, established relationship, Theo makes a pros and cons list of dating you, reader avoids Theo like the Filch avoids a bath, reader is not in Slytherin

A/n: Never really wrote something this angsty before so please let me know if you like it

Part Two

Pros and Cons part one

I sigh, falling onto the bed. The aroma of ash and cedar floats around me. He is late. Theo was supposed to meet me in his dorm to study yet he is late. Theo and I have been dating for three months. I couldn’t believe it when he asked me out. I mean Theo is cold and shut off from the world except his small group of friends.

Fate introduced us, well in the shape of Slughorn. The potion’s professor assigned us as partners. First, he didn’t talk. Only answered in grunts and hums. Over time, he would chuckle at my remarks or correct me throughout our potions. We would study together in the library or the courtyard if I could convince him that he needed sunshine. Eventually, it evolved to late night talks in the astronomy tower where he asked me out.

Standing up, I look around the dorm. Not much in here. No personal touches. Books stacked neatly on his desk. I run my fingers along the desk, smiling to myself. No dirt. Theo is such a neat freak. My brow furrows as I spot a wad of paper sticking out from under the desk. I bend down to pick it up. Its probably just an old sheet of homework. I unfold it, my heart lodging in my throat as I read the words.

Pros and cons of Dating Y/n

Pros

Beautiful, so beautiful it hurt look at times

Smartm freakishly smart

Fantastic sense of humor

Kind, tutors the younger students

Loves to eat, I can't wait to cook her Nana’s special recipe

Never shies away from me

Cons

Different house

Sometimes too bubbly

Bossy

Wants a real relationship

The paper falls from my fingers, floating to the ground. Tears that I tried so hard to fight fall down my cheeks. I take an unsteady step back, shaking my head. Out. I need out. The door slams shut behind me. A real relationship? Is that not what he wants.

I managed to avoid Theo for three days before he cornered me. Well pulled me into an abandoned classroom. “Why are you avoiding me?” Theo asks, voice laced with exhaustion. The dark spots under his eyes tell me he hasn’t been getting any sleep. “I don’t know-” Theo shakes his head. “Please do not insult either of our intelligence by acting like you have no clue what I am talking about.” I gulp, walking around to sit on a dusty desk. “Amore please tell me what's wrong?” I shake my head, tears forming at the nickname. “Please?” Theo whispers, kneeling in front of me.

“I found the list you made.” Theo fliches as if I had slapped him. “W-what list?” The tears blur my vision as I will them not to fall. “The pros and cons list of dating me.”

The air between the two of us tense. “Amore please let me explain.” The sadness I have felt for the last three days turn into red hot anger. I laugh dryly. “What is there to explain? You had to make a list about me in order to figure out if you wanted to date me.” I stand up, crossing the room. I needed space from Theo. “Amore please you have to understand I was scared, terrified really. You make me feel things I have never felt before. Its not an excuse though. I should have never done it.” Theo says, standing off the ground. “Why did you?” I ask, hating how small my voice sounded. “I was so nervous about the way you made me feel. So Draco and Blaise suggested to make a list. A list of reason on what I like about you. Pansy told me it was a stupid idea.” I nod, my frown deepening. “What about wanting a real relationship? That was on the con list.” Theo tenses before before taking a step forward. “I’ve never done this before. Wasn't sure if I could handle a real relationship.” I glare at him, throwing my hands up in the air. “You asked me out remember. I am not forcing you.” Theo sighs, rubbing the crease in between his eyebrows. “Thats- that's not what I meant.” He takes another forward. “I want a relationship with you. I want this.” He says, pointing at the space between us. I nod, wiping my cheeks. “So do I but I need space. That list hurt me. You put my insecurities on a sheet a paper to not date me. Just, i'm sorry Theodore.” I say, rushing out of the classroom without sparing Theo a second glance. The sound of desks being shoved brings another round of tears to my eyes. “Fuck!” Theo roars from the classroom.

What do I do now?

[melobballin]

no pain no game. juju watkins

✶ warnings ✶ 2.8k words count. black!fem reader. juju is being difficult and got a smart mouth. reader being worse. pt!reader. injured!juju. flirty!juju. agnst!juju. wlw. fluffy fluffy stuff.

"WE WANT YOU ON JUJU." Excuse you ? That's all your supervisor said to you before turning her heels and walking out of the classroom. No context. No time for you to blink or ask questions, let alone process what the fuck just happened.

Perfect timing. It was mid semester, you were already knee-deep in the trenches, buried under textbooks, assignments, and finals prep, trying really hard to keep your GPA from tanking.

But yeah, sure, babysitting juju sounded good, real good. Love that for you.

you’d handled injured athletes before—campus regulars, nothing wild. You could do this. No sweat.

But watkins ? That was a whole other story. juju meant headlines, pressure.

You were actually there when it happened. Your best friend, Nia, had basically dragged you to the court that night, guilt-tripping you with the "we never go out anymore !". And you remember it very vividly — her on the court, clutching her knee like it just stabbed her in the back mid-drive. Ever since, the whole department’s been walking on eggshells like somebody died or something.

You weren’t alarmed though. at all.

Yeah, it hurt to see her in pain like that, acl is no joke. But you somehow had no doubt that she was going to get through it in no time.

Still, as sure as you were, you had now a job to do. And baby, you damn good at your job. Top-of-the-class, resident miracle worker type good. Torn ACL ? Please. Move aside. You’ve handled worse.

Star player or not, bones heal the same.

“So… you said yes?” Nia called from the kitchen, halfway through some late-night snack that smelled like burnt remnants.

You rolled your eyes, sinking deeper into the couch cushions. “I didn’t even get the chance to say no. She hit me with the ‘you’re doing it’ and dipped.”

Nia strolled over, plate in hand, and dropped down next to you, pretending to be an emotional support. “And you mad ‘cause… what? You scared you’re actually gonna do a good job and fix her knee and end up in her bed or sum ?"

You side-eyed her. "Be serious please."

“I am,” she mumbled through a bite. “That girl is fine and you got godly hands. It’s like destiny.”

You rolled your eyes but didn’t deny it. Juju was fine as hell. And intense. And slightly terrifying.

“I don’t care how good her crossover is,” you said, scrolling on your phone. “If she comes in with a bad attitude and try to run me over, I swear—”

“Girl,” Nia cut you off, grinning. “quit playing. You love a little spice. And you do be killin’ it out here. Stop worrying so much.”

You sighed, flipping onto your back. She smirked. “Anyway, make this entertaining for me. I’m bored or whatever.”

You grabbed a pillow and threw it at her. “I should jump you.”

Safe to say you kept scrolling through your phone that night, looking for her ig.

JUJU WAS LATE. Not the 2 minutes kinda late, the kinda late that made you be on ten. The rehab gym was hot and humid which was disgusting. your baby hairs were already fluffing out. Great start.

When Juju finally strolled in—hoodie pulled tight over her head, brace strapped on like armor, headphones jammed deep in her ears, and a blank face, you were already in position — file in hand, game face locked.

She didn't even glance your way. Just walked right past like you were invisible.

Okay. Cute.

You tapped her AirPods case on the table, trying to stay cool and calm. Click. Click. "You can take those out, missy." you said, finally putting her AirPods case on the table softly. "You won’t need them to hoop."

Nothing. Just a pair of eyes blinking at you like you were crazy.

She sat down, barely even breathed. Instead she stared at you, trying to figure out what the fuck you were talking about.

"You must be an intern or something," she finally said. "Ain’t no way you just asked me to hoop when i still got screws in my knee."

"I’m not. I’m the reason your ass gon’ be back on court. Now take the ball."

She stared. You stared back. If she wanted to waste her time staring into your soul, you weren’t going to waste yours.

“Just take the damn ball,” you said again, softer now. “I wanna see how you move. That’s it.”

Her eyes flicker around the room like she’s trying to will herself into confidence before snatching the ball from your hands. She barely bounces the ball before halting, the brace making her movement stiff and unfamiliar.

“Take your time.” you say, voice gentle but steady. “There’s no rush.”

She didn’t answer, just took another stiff step, the brace groaning under pressure. Her jaw clenched, her shoulders stiff. Then—

“Fuck,” she hissed, almost too quiet. You stepped closer. “That your leg talking or your pride?”

She side-eyed you. “Don’t start with me.”

“Already did. You showed up to my session late, full of attitude, and acting like I begged you to be here but can’t handle a little hooping.”

That got her attention. She turned to face you fully now. “Nobody begged. You lucky they trust you with me.”

You raised a brow. “No. You’re lucky. I’m the best.”

She let out a short laugh. “cocky on the first day ? Crazy.”

You smiled sweetly. “I’m not cocky. I’m confident. Unlike you right now. I don’t crumble when the pressure’s on.”

She licked her lips, slowly. “Yeah, we’ll see how long you keep talkin’ that shit when I’m back on the court… or in your face.”

You swallowed hard. One thing about you—if somebody came at you with flames, you were matching it with a wildfire. And Juju wouldn’t be no exception.

You stepped back, shaking your head. “Alright, hoop barbie. Let’s get to work.”

But she didn’t move. Just looked you over once—slow—and smirked.

“Bet.”

to : judea (watkins)

ur gonna get through this.

imma make sure you do.

YOU DON’T KNOW WHEN IT HAPPENED EXACTLY. Maybe it was after the fourth session when she finally showed up on time, hair slicked into a ponytail this time, knee brace strapped tighter and eyes just a little less dead. Or maybe it was the seventh, when she made that sarcastic comment about your outfit and you caught her smirking behind her water bottle.

Either way, it was clear that something in the air had shifted.

The routine was… comfortable. Begrudgingly so. She’d come in with that same grimace, all hoodie and bad attitude, and you’d hit her with your most professional voice, clipboard in hand, instructions clear. She’d push back every time—“Why we doing this again?” or “You tryna kill me today ?”but her body never lied. She followed through. She moved. She tried.

You’d both pretend it wasn’t a big deal.

Even when she made little comments like, “You always wear those leggings?” with a cocked brow and a glance that lasted too long.

"You’re always up in peoples business?” You didn’t entertain her. Much. Just smiled to yourself, flipped the page on your clipboard, and gave her an extra set just for being smart and annoying.

Tonight, though, it was different.

The gym was quiet, just you two again. Everyone else had cleared out early, and she was doing balance drills on the BOSU ball, arms stretched out like wings, focused as hell.

“Don’t lock your knee,” you warned, hovering nearby. “You’ll regret it in the morning.”

“I regret a lot of things already,” she muttered, wobbling slightly but catching herself. “One more won’t kill me.”

You gave her a look. She met it, sharp and tired.

“Alright,” you sighed, grabbing her towel. “That’s enough for today.”

“No,” she said quickly. “I can do one more set.”

“You’ve done five, juju. I’m not playing with you.”

She stepped down, chest rising and falling like she’d just run laps instead of standing still. Her eyes were darting around again, like she couldn’t sit still in her own skin. You saw it coming before she even opened her mouth.

“I don’t know who I am without ball.”

You blinked.

She wasn’t looking at you. Just standing there, towel hanging from her fingers, lips parted like she didn’t mean to say it out loud.

“Like…” she exhaled, sharp. “Everybody keeps acting like I’m gonna bounce right back, like it’s just a matter of time. Rehab. Surgery. Boom, I’m back on the court. But what if I don’t bounce back ? What if I’m… not that juju anymore?”

Her voice cracked on “juju.”

Your chest tightened. You stepped closer, gentle but sure. “Ju.”

She flinched a little at the sound of that nickname.

“You are still her. You’re just injured. Not erased.”

She laughed bitterly, wiping her face with her hoodie sleeve. “Yeah, easy for you to say. You ain’t the one waking up every day wondering if people only see you for how fast you run a play.”

You crossed your arms, firm. “No. But I see people fall apart in here every week. And guess what ? I’ve watched ‘em get back up. You’re not special.”

That made her look at you.

“I mean—no offense,” you added quickly, biting back a smirk. “You’re talented. Ridiculous, even. But you’re not the only person who’s ever had to fight for their comeback. And you sure as hell won’t be the last.”

Her eyes were glossy now, and her jaw flexed like she was trying to bite down her emotions.

“I hate this shit,” she muttered. “I hate needing help.”

“I know,” you said, softer now. “But you don’t have to like it. You just gotta let it work.”

She stared at you a little too long.

And then, like instinct, she leaned into you—shoulder brushing yours as she sank onto the bench nearby. She wasn’t crying. Not exactly. But her silence said more than enough.

You sat beside her, gently passing her the water bottle she’d ignored earlier. For the first time, she took it without a snide remark. “…Thanks,” she murmured.

You nodded, tapping your nails against your clipboard. “So, next session, we start resistance band training.”

She groaned, head tilting back dramatically. “Do you actually hate me ? You love torturing me.”

You smirked. “Don’t flatter yourself. I’d torture anyone for their own good.” Juju glanced sideways at you, smile faint but real. “You really believe I’ll make it back?”

“I told you I was gonna make sure you do. I don’t play about my job. Plus, I wouldn’t be wasting my time if I didn’t.”

Her gaze lingered. And for once, she didn’t say anything back.

Didn’t need to. The look on her face said everything : thank you, even if I don’t want to say it out loud.

YOU SWEAR JUJU HAS BEEN ON SOMETHING DIFFERENT LATELY. Not much had changed in the routine itself. Rehab drills. Knee work. Progress checks. But the energy though ? Completely different. She shows up with snacks now—sometimes two, casually tossing you one with a lazy, “figured you’d forget to eat.”

She still had that same tough, deadpan delivery, but it didn’t hit the same no more. Not when she lingers a second too long near your desk. Not when she catches your eye in the mirror while she’s stretching and smirks like she knew exactly what she was doing.

One afternoon, she flopped down on the mat, arms stretched over her head, all sweaty and grinning. You raised a brow. “You okay or just being dramatic?”

“Both,” she wheezed. “But if I die, I want you to know… I was right. That playlist does suck.”

You chucked your pen at her. “I should let your knee lock up for that.”

“Oh ? So violence is your love language?”

You froze for a beat.

She then laughed—really laughed—before sitting up slowly, stretching out her arms again. “You should see your face,” she teased, biting down a grin.

“Okay now you’re pissing me off,” you said, clearing your throat, flipping a page on your clipboard for no reason other than to stop yourself from blushing. “Go back to work.”

She was still grinning, smug and pleased with herself.

But then there were softer moments, too.

Like the time her brace pinched her skin mid-session and you immediately knelt to adjust it, fingers brushing against her calf. She sucked in a breath—not from pain, but from the way your hands moved.

You glanced up. “Too tight?” You softly asked.

Her eyes were already on you. “Nah. Just not used to people touchin’ me like that.”

You didn’t know what to say to that, so you didn’t say anything. Just fixed the strap gently and stood back up.

Or the time she stayed after a session, claiming she needed to ice longer. You both ended up sitting on the floor by the wall, sharing a bottle of Gatorade and talking about nothing—her love-hate relationship with her coach, your childhood memories.

She bumped your knee with hers. “You real easy to talk to, you know that?”

“Keep gassing me up and I’m gonna start charging you per session.”

“Oh, so that’s what this is. Trappin’ me with kindness so you can run up my insurance bill.”

You snorted. “Exactly. Imma finesse your ass.”

You both laughed. And it lingered. Longer than it should’ve.

Then came the night it rained. Hard. She was the last person of your schedule again, and you were packing up when she peeked around the door, hoodie soaked, sneakers squeaking on the floor.

You raised a brow. “You walked in this?”

“Had no umbrella,” she shrugged. “Didn’t know if I’d make it on time. Didn’t wanna miss you.”

Your breath caught. Real subtle.

“Come here,” you said, grabbing a towel and tossing it at her. “You look like a wet cat.”

She took it and laughed, wiping her face. “You like cats?”

“No, but I’m starting to tolerate you, so maybe.”

“Oh wow,” she grinned. “I’m honored.”

She stayed longer that night. Sat with you while you finished your notes. She told you about her siblings. About her mom. How people all expected her to “tough it out,” and get back better even when she was hurting.

You just listened, letting her talk.

And at one point, she leaned against your shoulder—barely there, just enough to feel her warmth.

Neither of you said anything.

But she whispered, after a minute, “You kinda make it feel okay to be weak for a second.”

You turned your head toward her, heart thudding. “You’re not weak, Juju.”

She met your eyes. “Yeah… but you make it feel valid, ★. Even when it’s not true, ” That was the first time she called you by your name, too. Soft. Like it meant something.

And you swore, right then and there, something had shifted for good.

From : ju 🤍

u coming tonight right ?

I’m so ready !!!

To : ju 🤍

staff needs me at the center sorry

ik you’ll be killing it. proud of u <3

YOU DIDN’T GO TO THE GAME. You sat in your room, lights low, music on but not loud, your phone flipped upside down on the bed beside you. Every so often, you glanced at it. Waiting. Not for the score—you already knew she’d kill it—but maybe some word from her. A sign. Something small and stupid, like a “we won” or a selfie from the locker room.

Nothing came.

And you hated how disappointed you felt. Because it was your choice, right ? You’d made the call. You pulled back. Slowed the texts, the lingering touches. Didn’t show up to her last rehab session. Pretended like you were just busy.

It wasn’t a punishment.

You just… didn’t know how to let yourself want her. Not without getting burned.

The thing was—when she was hurt, she needed you. But now ? She was Juju again. Star of the team. Walking headline. Game day was hers. The roar of the crowd, the bright lights, the whole she’s back narrative. And you? You were just someone who helped her get there.

So you kept your distance. Told yourself it was safer that way.

Until your phone buzzed at 11:42 p.m.

From : juju 🤍

open the door.

I’m outside.

You stared at the message. Didn’t move at first. Then—three knocks.

You opened the door slowly, and there she was.

Still in sweats, hair tied up, slides on, backpack slung over one shoulder. Her eyes met yours, and for a second, neither of you said anything.

“I waited for you,” she said, voice low.

You blinked. “I know.”

She stepped inside without asking. Dropped her bag by the wall. Didn’t sit. Just turned to face you.

“You really weren’t gonna come?”

You crossed your arms. “Didn’t think it would matter.”

She laughed, short and sharp. “Right. ’Cause I just spent all these months blowing up your phone for fun.”

You stayed quiet.

“I looked for you,” she said, voice tighter now. “I kept checking the stands like an fucking idiot.”

You let out a breath. “Juju, what do you want from me?”

She stared at you. “I want to know why the hell you started acting like none of it meant anything.”

You swallowed. Looked down. “Because I didn’t want to make it harder when it ended.”

“When what ended?”

“This,” you said, motioning vaguely. “You. Me. Whatever… this was. It was never gonna last, and I’d rather stop now than wait for you to ghost me when everything goes back to normal.”

She flinched. “You think I’m just gonna dip on you because I got back on my feet ?”

“I think you don’t know what you want,” you said, softer. “And I think when you do figure it out, it won’t be me.”

Silence stretched out between you. Her jaw clenched. Her eyes dropped to the floor.

“You really think I’m that shallow?” she asked, voice lower now, almost hurt.

“I think you’re used to people wanting you for what you do. Not who you are. And I think that makes it easy to walk away when shit gets real.”

She didn’t say anything for a long second. Then she finally moved—slow, like she was figuring it out in real time. Walked closer until there was barely a foot between you.

“I’m not good at this,” she said, honest and quiet. “Not with feelings. I don’t talk. I just… I play. I move. I keep it moving. But this?” She gestured between you. “I wasn’t trying to just pass time. I needed you. And not just for the knee.”

You looked at her. Really looked at her. She looked tired. Still sweaty around the hairline. Eyes puffy like she might’ve cried on the way here. And you softened, just a little.

“I was scared,” she admitted. “I still am. You saw me at my lowest. And instead of clowning me, you stayed. That shit… messed me up a little. Made me wanna be soft, even when I didn’t know how.”

Your chest tightened. You didn’t trust it. But damn, it felt true.

“I like you,” she said, no frills. “And I don’t wanna go back to my life like none of this happened. Not without you in it.”

You didn’t respond right away. You were still processing the fact that she was standing in your room, post-win, looking at you like you were the prize.

Then you stepped forward. Just enough to close the space.

“So… what now?” you asked, voice barely above a whisper.

She shrugged, hand grazing yours. “We figure it out. Slowly. If you want.”

You hesitated, then laced your fingers with hers. Felt her thumb move softly over the back of your hand.

“I want,” you said. “But I need you to mean it.”

“I do,” she murmured.

And then you kissed her.

Not rushed. Not needy. Just real. Gentle, warm, slow like exhale after a long-ass day. Her hands found your waist, yours found her hoodie. She leaned into you like she’d been holding that tension for too long. And you let yourself fall for a second. Let it feel good.

She tightened her arm around your waist. “You know I’m not going anywhere, right?”

You didn’t answer. Just held her a little tighter.

Because you were starting to believe it.

And for once, that was enough.

© written by melobballin | please be gentle with me that’s my first writing for ju 🤍 hope you’ll like it !

[leo-in-the-pitt]

What's Next

This is Chapter 4 of the Beginning to End series !

Summary: You just started as a night shift attending but, one choice made the night you and Jack got engaged may change everything you had planned. But for better or worse?

Warnings: Pure fluff, pregnancy, 10k words of Jack being the sweetest man on the planet

WC 10.1k

What's Next

“I think we need to go buy some tests.”

Jack froze like a deer in headlights. “Shit.” His eyes widening as his jaw practically fell to the floor at the weight of your words. “No, we’re in a hospital, you can just get blood work done, it’s more accurate.”

You crossed your arms over your chest, your heart pounding hard against your ribs. “Jack, no. I love everyone here but, no. I don’t need any of them drawing my blood right now.”

“Let me do it.”

You blinked hard at him “Jack, what?”

“Let me draw your labs. I’m not waiting for you to pee on some stick when I can do this right now and get an answer. Right here, right now.”

You shook your head, already stepping towards the bathroom door. “No, Jack. No, no, no, no.” You tried to leave, but before you get around him, he moved fast, slipping in front of you and gently placing his hands on your arms to stop you.

“Hey, come on. I know you’re scared but so am I, okay? But if we do this now we’ll know we were getting ourselves into sooner rather than later.”

Felt as though there was a lump in your throat. You could feel his pulse through his fingertips where he touched your arms, grounding you in a moment that didn’t feel real. The light of the hospital bathroom buzzed faintly overhead, and the muffled sounds of monitors and voices outside the door reminded you where you were—and who you were trying not to be right now.

“You can’t just walk my blood over to the lab Jack.”, you said quietly. “Basically all of this hospital knows that we’re engaged, I don’t need them knowing that you got me pregnant too.” 

Jack’s mouth twitched into something between a wince and a smirk. “Look, we’ve been together for over 2 years, obviously we’re having sex. That’s not going to be much of a surprise to anybody.”

“Okay yeah but, maybe I don’t want to know if I’m pregnant or not.”

He looked confused. “What do you mean you don’t want to know? If you’re pregnant, we have much bigger conversations and decisions that have to happen. And soon.”

“Jack, I don’t want to pee on some stick or get my blood drawn or — “ You took a deep breath. “anything. Please, just give me a second to process the fact that I might be pregnant right now. I could be growing your child right now and I don’t know how to feel about that yet.”

“Look, no matter what happens, you know that I’ll be right by your side right?” He tilted his head down he get a better look at you.

“I know Jack. I know. We should probably get out of here.” you said, glancing toward the door. “Before someone comes knocking.”

Like a cue from the universe itself. A knock on the door.

“Shit.” You whispered. “What do we do?”

The door handle jiggled.

“One second!” Jack yelled, just as you shouted, “In here!”

“Oh my fucking god Jack. They’re going to think we’re having sex in here or something!”

“Okay look you leave first, then I’’ll leave.”

“That’s worse,” you hissed. “Like you were tucking it back into your pants or something. We should just leave together. We’ve been in here too long already.”

Without waiting for his reply, you pulled the door open and walked out, your face burning as the hallway came into view. Too many eyes turned toward you. Nurses at the desk, a resident walking passed, even one of the janitors paused mid-mop. Your chest tightened. The hallway a spotlight.

Jack followed close behind. You could feel his presence at your back, steady and maybe a little sheepish.

Standing right outside the door was Dana.

“God I thought I was going to piss myself. Take it home next time kids.” She said jokingly. 

Jack immediately lifted both palms like he was surrendering to the police. “My pants were on the whole time, I swear.”

You groaned, dragging a hand down your face. “Jack, really?” You didn’t wait for a response. Just shook your head and walked away, almost breaking into a run.

Behind you, you could feel Dana and Jack exchanging awkward glances. 

“You guys doing alright?” Dana asked softly, her usual teasing tone gone.

Jack’s voice was barely audible. “Um, ye—yeah. I think so. Ha—have a good shift, Dana.”

Moments later, you heard his footsteps speeding up behind you as he jogged to catch up.

You didn’t speak right away. Just kept walking, staring straight ahead, feeling everyone’s eyes start to drift back to their own work. Eventually.

Jack fell into step beside you, close enough that your arms brushed.

Neither of you said anything for a while. But in the quiet, in the closeness, something else passed between you.

A storm was coming. But at least, for now, you weren’t facing it alone.

“Can we just go please?” You practically begged him.

“Yeah come on.” He put his arm around you as you both walked to the car in silence. 

The car radio the only sound filling the space between you two. 

He missed the turn to the apartment.

“Jack, where are we going?” You shifted in your seat.

He didn’t take his eyes off the road. “Thought you wanted to buy some tests? You don’t have to take them yet but, at least the option will be there whenever you decide you’re ready. Okay?”

“That’s fine…” you slumped back down. 

The drive felt eternal. Each streetlight turned red like it knew you needed more time. The silence between you grew heavier with every block, like gravity itself was trying to pull the truth closer.

Eventually, he pulled into the quiet parking lot of a 24-hour pharmacy. It was only 8am. You both go in slowly, not speaking, the air thick with the weight of what you might be walking toward.

Inside, the store was nearly empty. A single bored cashier scrolled on her phone behind the counter.

In a quiet corner, beneath flickering fluorescent lights, the two of you stood in front of a wall of pregnancy tests. So many options. Pink ones. Blue ones. Some boasting "99% accuracy." Others promising results "6 days before your missed period."

Your fingers were threaded together, but your palms were damp. The silence between you wasn’t comfortable anymore—it was stretched thin.

“Which ones are the most accurate?” you murmured, scanning the shelves with narrowed eyes.

“How am I supposed to know?” He was clearly overwhelmed.

“You’re the doctor here.” You snapped back at him.

“You’re also a doctor…” He sighed heavily.

“I don’t know. I don’t do this all the time Jack.”

He raised his eyebrows. “Neither do I.”

“Let’s just get the digital one. I don’t want to have to argue about if we see one or two lines.”

“God. What if it’s positive?” You felt your eyes begin to water. 

Jack didn’t answer right away. He reached up and tucked a strand of hair behind your ear before gently resting his hand on your back. “Then we’ll figure it out babygirl. It’s sooner than we wanted, but—we’ll be okay.”

Your eyes flicked across the shelves again, avoiding his gaze. “We said we’d wait. We had a plan. Get married. Buy a house. Travel. Maybe in two, three years. This wasn’t supposed to happen now Jack.” You turned your head slowly toward him. He was already looking at you, his eyes filled with something warm and gentle. The tears spilled over despite your best effort.

“Plans change all the time.”

“How are you not scared?”

He smiled faintly. “Not scared? Babygirl, I’m terrified. But not at the possibility of becoming a dad. Not about starting a family with you. I’m scared of you feeling like I’m dragging you into something you’re not ready for.”

“You’re not.” You whispered. “Jack, you’re the only part I’m sure of.”

He put his arm around you. You lean into him and reached for the box on the shelf. “Maybe we should just buy a couple?” you murmured, lifting 2 more boxes. “Just to be sure?”

Your steps were slow, deliberate, as if the ground beneath you had suddenly become fragile.

The cashier didn’t look up from her phone until you placed the boxes on the counter. Her eyes flicked between you and Jack, then down at the pregnancy tests, then back again. 

She didn’t say a word—just scanned them and bagged them with a blank expression that somehow felt merciful.

Back in the car, you sat in silence again. The bag sat in your lap like it might explode. Jack kept his eyes on the windshield, hands resting on the steering wheel even though the car was in park.

“So,” he said gently, “do you want to do this now or wait a little longer?”

You leaned your head back against the seat, closing your eyes and took a deep breath. 

“I just need a little more time,” you said quietly. “Just one more day. To breathe. To pretend nothing’s different. Like nothing’s going to change.”

There was a long pause, the kind that says more than silence usually can.

“Okay,” he said finally. “One more day. But whatever that test says—I'm not going anywhere. No matter what you want to do. We'll face it together. Always. Until the end.”

You turned to look at him. He was already watching you.

And for the first time that morning, your breath didn’t feel so heavy. You didn’t feel alone.

————————————————————

The Next Morning

The apartment was still, silent in that fragile way it only ever was before the day truly began. Outside, the clouds had settled low and heavy, casting a soft gray hue through the blinds. Rain tapped gently on the windows around you.

Jack had gone out not long ago to get breakfast, coffee—something to do to distract himself from the possibility of you both becoming parents. You hadn’t told him yet that you were ready. Not really. But the moment the door clicked shut behind him, the stillness had grown too loud, the questions too sharp.

The unopened pregnancy tests sat in front of you on the coffee table, They stared back at you, innocent and terrifying all at once.

You couldn’t sit still.

You were pacing the living room now, arms folded, bare feet quiet against the floorboards, eyes flicking to the window every few seconds. 

When you finally saw Jack’s car pull into the lot, your heart skipped a beat. He moved through the rain, hoodie already soaked, carrying a brown bag in one hand, the coffee tray in the other. The normalcy of it almost broke you.

The door creaked open, and there he was—dripping rainwater and bringing in the smell of fresh coffee. He kicked off his shoes and set everything down on the kitchen counter, glancing up at you with a soft smile.

You were standing still again, but everything in you was moving around you.

“Breakfast has arrived,” He looked into your eyes. He knew something was coming. “What happened?”

You swallowed hard. “I took them, Jack. The tests.”

His whole posture changed. “Wait, when? What’d they say?”

“I don’t know yet,” you said, quickly, almost breathless. “I took them maybe 20 seconds before you walked in. I just,I couldn’t wait. I didn’t want to sit here thinking about it anymore. I needed to know. I’m sorry I didn’t wait for you.”

He stepped closer, water still dripping from the hem of his sleeves. “No, no, it’s okay. I didn’t need to see you pee on a stick. I mean, I’m glad you did it. How long do they take? Three minutes, right?”

“Probably like a minute left.” You stood facing him, the air thick with tension. 

“One more minute,” he whispered.

Your eyes glistened, tears not yet fallen, and in that moment, he reached out and wrapped his arms around you. Your body folded into his, cheek pressed to his chest, and his hand found the back of your head, fingers threading into your hair.

“We’ll be okay, babygirl,” he murmured. His voice was steady, but his heartbeat was the opposite. It pounded against your ear. 

You didn’t think about the rain anymore. You didn’t think about breakfast. The outside world, gone in an instant.

Thirty seconds.

He kissed the top of your head.

Twenty.

You closed your eyes, grounding yourself in the way he smelled—like rain and shampoo from his morning shower.

Ten.

You pulled back slowly. His arms stayed around you. “Should we go look?”

He nodded, taking a breath that sounded more like a gulp. “Let’s go.”

He didn’t let go of your hand.

Together, you walked through the apartment, slow steps across the cold wood floor. Each one felt like it carried the weight of an entire future. 

The morning light had shifted slightly—gold now, warmer, filling the tiny bathroom. The test sat there, small and silent, the screen face-up.

Neither of you looked at it yet. You were still watching each other.

“Okay,” you said, voice soft, shakey. “Let’s look at the same time.”

He nodded, breath unsteady. “Three… two… one.”

Your eyes dropped to the test together.

Pregnant.

You didn’t breathe. Felt as if your heart stopped in that moment.

Jack stared at it, unmoving, then slowly looked back at you. His face was pure shock.

“I think we’re gonna have a baby,” you said, voice barely above a whisper. 

His eyes glued to the test. Not blinking.

“Jack…”

He looked up at you. Down at the test again. Then back up to you. “Are you- are you sure? Should we maybe take another one? Just to be sure? Don’t we have two more tests?”

“I already did,” you said, reaching out with a shaky hand to lift the box from the counter, taking out the other tests, reading them carefully. “I took all of them. They all say the same thing. Pregnant.”

His mouth parted like he wanted to say something, but nothing came out. And then, the corners of his lips curled upwards while his eyes lightened. “We’re gonna have a baby…I’m gonna be a dad?”

A slight laugh came out of you. “You’re gonna be a dad.”

He stepped forward and pulled you into him, lifting you off the floor just enough to spin you once in the tiny space. You laughed again, a real one this time, your tears began to fall onto his shoulders. He set you down gently, holding your face in his hands, kissing your lips.

“You’re gonna be a mom,” he whispered. “And you’re gonna be so amazing at it.”

You stared at him, overwhelmed and in love and terrified and full of something so much bigger than all of it. “We didn’t plan this,” you said. 

“I know,” he said. “But plans change sometimes, and that’s okay.”

You put your head on his shoulder. “I’m scared,” you admitted.

“So am I,” he said. “But I’m more sure of you than I’ve ever been about anything.”

And with that, the storm outside faded to background noise.

And somehow, it felt like exactly where you were meant to be.

———————————————————— 

You both left the bathroom. The three tests still sitting on the bathroom counter. 

The word sat between you like a fragile truth: Pregnant.

Jack held your hand as you walked back into the kitchen.

“I keep thinking I should be saying something,” he said softly, voice catching in his throat. “Something comforting. But all I can think about is how everything going to be changed.”

“It doesn’t feel real yet,” you whispered.

“I know.”

You stepped back against the kitchen counter. Head down, eyes staring at the tiled below. 

“What do we do now?” you asked, your voice quieter than before, almost like you were afraid of the answer.

Jack didn’t speak for a moment. He just looked at you—the woman he was going to marry, the love of his life, now maybe the mother of his child. 

“We eat breakfast,” he said finally, with a softness that made your chest ache. “And the we talk. We figure out the next step. One step at a time.”

“That’s your plan?”

“That’s the only one I’ve got right now, because if I start trying to plan out the next nine months, or twenty years, you’ll be taking me back to the ER.”

You exhaled, laughing through the tears. “Okay. Breakfast.”

“Come on. You’ve got a baby to feed now.”

The rain was still tapping lightly on the windows. Jack opened the brown bag, unwrapped a breakfast sandwich, setting it gently in front of you.

“Let’s go to the couch.”

You sat together on the couch, side by side. The world around you still at a stop. 

Jack turned toward you, his arm resting along the back of the couch. “Are you okay?”

You chewed slowly, nodded once, then looked at him. “I think I will be. I’m still scared. I don’t think that’s going to go away for the rest of my life now. But I know I’m not alone.” You smiled softly at him. 

“Never,” he said. “You’ll never be alone in this. Or anything for that matter.”

You leaned your head against his shoulder. For a few minutes, you just sat there in silence, the rain against the window the only sound.

And then, quietly you murmured, “I don’t even know where to start Jack.”

Jack’s hand found yours again, squeezing gently.

“Look, we just need to talk. About everything. And anything. You can’t shut me out. Tell me what you need, when you need it. You’re carrying my child now. Whatever you need, I’m there. I just need to know what’s going on in that head of yours. Okay?”

You nodded gently. Your hand lightly on your stomach—instinctively, like it was already a habit.

His eyes followed the movement, and he reached over to rest his hand gently over yours.

“Hey,” he said suddenly, voice quiet but steady. “Do you think maybe this is what was supposed to happen? I mean nothing we ever planned went our way. Maybe this is  just what the universe has planned next for us.”

You looked at him for a long time. Saying nothing while thinking everything.

“Maybe,” you whispered. “Maybe this was exactly how the rest of our lives was meant to begin.”

———————————————————— 

Business as Usual

A baby wasn’t going to stop you from going to work. Not even Jack breathing down your neck any chance he got. 

He watched you like a hawk ever since you saw that one little word of the test a week ago. 

“Hey babygirl, how are you guys doing?”

You looked to the left and right, ensuring no one was close enough to hear the words that just came out of his mouth. “Jack I told you to stop saying that. Someone is going to hear you.”

“Sorry, just a habit already I guess. You excited for later?”

Your first OB appointment. Jack pulled some strings. Afterall, he has gained some respect since delivering multiple babies himself in the ED. One call, and you had a visit with the best attending OB in the hospital. 

“Nervous, excited. Everything really. Mostly want to know how far along I am. Want to know which time it was.”

Jack gave you that half-smirk he always did when he was trying not to look too proud of himself. 

“Well, you’ll know soon. He is the best OB around. He’s calm under pressure and blunt as hell. You’ll like him.”

“Well let’s hope he can keep a secret. You’ve been ready to tell everybody and anybody all week. 

Jack raised both hands. “I’m just excited. Sue me.”

You paused, the soft echo of nurse chatter coming closer to you two. You could feel the weight of the night dragging—the long hours, the fake smiles, the secret growing inside of you.

“Just keep it cool, okay?” you said, your voice quieter now. “I haven’t wrapped my own head around it.”

Jack’s expression softened. “You don’t have to do this alone. Whatever happens today, I’ve got you.”

That stopped you.

You turned to look at him. Really look.

“I know,” you said. 

The office was on the other side of the hospital. You two would need to find a way to sneak upstairs without anybody seeing which direction you had gone. And day shift was a lot busier than your regular nights.

“Just pretend you’re going to the bathroom in the corner. I’ll sneak over there to get you and we’ll go through the back.”

“Not going to work but, fine.”

You left first, avoiding anybody at all cost. He soon followed without stopping to talk to anybody. But Jack didn’t need to open his mouth to be seen. 

“Where are those two going?” Langdon nodded over to Dana across the nurses station. 

“No idea. Been acting weird all week since I caught them in the bathroom together.” 

“That’s what the on call rooms are for.” Dana shot him a side eye that could be felt throughout the entire ER. “Or so I’ve heard.”

————————————————————

First Appointment 

The walk to the OB floor felt longer than usual. Jack stood beside you, unusually quiet, hands stuffed in his pockets. Maybe he finally sensed how real this was starting to feel.

You glanced up at him. “You know we’re going to have to do this a lot right?”

He scoffed. “Good, I’ve gotta get my steps in. Besides, I’ve seen enough ultrasounds—I want to know if I’ve still got the eye for it.”

“Jack,” you warned, giving him a sideways glare.

“What? I’m just saying.”

The elevator dinged and the doors slid open. Soft pastel prints of sleepy newborns lined the walls. 

You wrapped your arms across your stomach, unsure if you were protecting something or hiding it.

At the front desk, the nurse glanced between you and Jack when he gave your name.

“He’s with me,” you said quickly. She didn’t ask questions.

A few minutes later, you were in an exam room. Cold paper crinkling beneath you. The hum of a fetal monitor you weren't sure would pick anything up yet.

The nurse comes in, takes your vitals, and then leaves. You both sit quietly for a few minutes until the doctor enters.

“Wait, it’s a HIPAA violation for them to say that they saw us up here right?” 

“Yeah of course, just calm down nobody saw us. And even if they did, let them talk. This is between us for now and it’s going to stay that way until we decide otherwise.”

Then came the knock.

The doctor entered like he owned the hospital—smart blue eyes, white coat already half open, clipboard in hand. He looked up and smiled politely. 

“You must be the ED doc.”

Jack grinned. “Guilty.”

He raised an eyebrow. “He better not have promised anything I can’t deliver.”

You spoke for the first time in several minutes. “I just want to know what’s going on. How far I am. And that everything’s okay so far.”

His face softened. “That’s exactly what we’re going to do today.”

The screen came to life. Cold gel. Wand pressed just below your pelvis. Jacks hand never leaving yours. And then—There it was.

A flicker. A rhythm.

Jack leaned forward, lips parting like he wasn’t sure how to breathe. You didn’t even realize you’d been holding your own breath until it came out in a shaky laugh.

He pointed. “There’s the heartbeat. Measuring about…seven weeks. Everything looks good so far.” His eyes bounced around the screen.

You felt your eyes sting.

Seven weeks.

Jack whispered, “Holy shit…”

You didn’t say anything. Not yet.

But you squeezed his hand tight. 

“I told you...”

Jack lightly laughed. 

“Were we taking bets on how far along you are?” 

“Something like that.”

“Was there a special occasion 7 weeks ago if I may ask?”

You said nothing. Just held up your left hand to show your engagement ring.

“Ah. That’ll do it. Trust me your not the first, definitely won’t be the last. Everything’s right on track so far. Take as long as you need in here. They’ll schedule your next appointment up front.”

After the doctor leaves the room, Jack leans back in the chair, arms crossed, clearly trying to hide his pride.

"So, seven weeks, huh? You hear that?”

You said nothing just shook your head at him as you sat up straight. “All because you couldn’t control yourself.”

Jack let out a laugh for the whole office to hear. “Well you did technically tell me to put a baby inside of you that night. Not like we’ve been doing anything to avoid this anyway.”

“I didn’t think it would actually happen though. Jack you literally finished inside of me once and now I’m going to have to push a baby out of me.”

“What can I say, I’ve got strong swimmers. You’re officially on the clock though.”

"It’s real now, isn't it?"

"Yeah, it’s real. And I have to say, I’m glad I didn’t mess that one up." He grins, trying to lighten the moment.

You smile at him, but there's something deeper in your gaze. “You’ve been a mess this week. But I’m glad you’re here."

His smile fades slightly as he meets your eyes. “You know, I’m not going anywhere, right?

"I know." You reach out, giving his hand a small squeeze. “You've made that pretty clear." You said as you looked down at your ring.

You started the walk back out. Once the elevator doors shut, he turned to you.

"So, what’s the next step? Do I need to start buying baby stuff yet?"

"Maybe wait until we get past the first trimester? But you’re right, we should probably start thinking about it. I don't even know where to begin."

"Well, you’ve got the doctor on speed dial now. And I started looking where to buy a crib.”

Rolling your eyes, “Of course you did.”

Back at the apartment, a familiar sense of calm falls over you as the door clicks shut behind you.

"I’m still trying to process everything."

He follows you in, kicking off his shoes and rubbing his face.

"Same here. You know, I’ve seen so many ultrasounds, but that one—seeing it flicker like that—there’s something about it, right? Its different when it’s real."

Sitting down on the couch, your hands resting gently over your stomach.

"It’s like it’s not just a picture anymore. It’s a baby. Our baby. It feels like everything changed in an instant."

He sits beside you, glancing at your hand over your stomach, a slight smile tugging at the corner of his lips.

"You’re right. Everything is different now. And I’m not saying it’s all going to be easy, but I think we’re going to be okay."

"I think we’re already figuring it out."

"I’m in this with you. Whatever comes next—every moment of it—I’m here."

"You sure about that? You know this is going to get crazy, right?"

"I’ve seen the chaos in the ER. I’m sure. You’re going to be a great mom. And me? I’m going to be an even better dad."

“Jack, what about the wedding? We’re supposed to go look at venues next week but, I don’t know if I want a big wedding now.” You glance down at your stomach. “You know with the baby and all?”

“So we’ll do something smal, intimate. I’ll take you to the courthouse and marry you right now if you really want.”

“Maybe not that small.” You laughed. “Maybe a dozen of our closet friends. The most important people in our lives, the ones that brought us together.”

“You tell me when and where, and I’ll be there.”

——————————————————————— 

One Month Later

Making your way through the ER, trying to act normal. The usual chaos of the hospital surrounds you, but it feels quieter today. You catch Jack’s eye across the room, and he gives you a wink. You smile back, heart racing for a different reason now.

As he approaches you, his voice drops low. "You okay?"

You glance around, ensuring nobody's listening before giving a small nod. "Yeah, just tired. But I’m okay. It feels weird not saying anything yet."

"Yeah. But we’ve got time. We don’t have to rush. You’ll tell the world when you’re ready. Just one more week until the first trimester is over. And you can tell whoever you want to tell. You’ve got a lot of people rooting for you both."

Feeling the weight of his words, you step closer to him, allowing the brief moment of connection to ground you in the middle of the chaos.

"I don’t know what I’d do without you."

"Probably lose your mind. Good thing I’m here to keep it together for you."

"Yeah. Good thing."

——————————————————————— 

13 Weeks Down 

You sit with a cup of coffee in your hands, feeling the weight of the decision you’ve been avoiding. It’s time. Jack's been saying you should do it, and now you know you can't hide it forever. The quiet hum of the lounge is filled with your thoughts as you look around at your coworkers.

He leans in, “So, you’re gonna do it, right?"

Raises an eyebrow at him, trying not to give away the nerves creeping up your spine. "You’re not making this any easier."

"You’re the one who wanted to wait. Now you’re just stalling."

Glances at the clock, taking a deep breath before standing up. Your hands are a little clammy, but you press on. You’re doing this. It's time.

You walk into the break room, where a few coworkers are hanging out, sipping on their drinks. Langdon, Dana, Mel all chatting. 

Langdon looks up from his phone as you enter. “There she is. How’s the baby-making project going?"

You freeze for a second, biting your lip. You can hear Jack’s voice in your head telling you not to hide anymore. You take a step forward, giving him a look before turning to the others.

“What’d you just say?”

“Well you guys were locked in the bathroom together a couple weeks ago. Figure that was the whole idea.” 

"Actually, that’s a - that’s what I wanted to talk about."

Pauses mid-bite, eyebrow raising as she studies you closely. “Are you serious right now? You’re pregnant?" Said Dana. 

You nod, a small, shaky laugh escaping you. "Yeah, I am. Thirteen weeks actually.” Your hand going up to rest on your stomach.

His eyes widen as a grin spreads across his face. “Well, hell. Congratulations kid! You know I’ve got all kinds of dad jokes ready to go for you." Langdon jumped out of his seat coming over to give you a hug.

Mel looks at you, her expression softening. "You’re really pregnant. Wow. You okay? That’s a lot to take in at work.”

Slightly chuckling, trying to hide the nerves. "Yeah, well, a little bit of a secret for the last couple of weeks. But I wanted to share it with all of you."

"Don’t worry, we won’t make it weird. Besides, I’ve seen the baby fever in the ER. It was only a matter of time before one of us jumped in."

Jack steps into the conversation, his usual cocky demeanor returning. “Hey, don’t act like you didn’t know. She’s been glowing. You know the signs. Not like we were trying but we also weren’t not trying, if you know what I mean.”

Dana tilts her head, eyes narrowing with a smile. “Huh surprised you kept quiet for this long Jack.”

Shrugs, hands up in mock surrender. “I didn’t say a word.”

“Yeah except for saying “how are you guys doing?” when it was only her around.” 

“I told you you were too loud. But really thanks, you guys. It’s a lot, and yeah, it feels like everything is changing. But I’m glad you’re all supportive. I’m still figuring it out, but I wanted you to know."

“Alright so I can’t keep that a secret forever. So, what’s the plan? Are you telling anyone else yet?" Said Mel excitedly as she sat back down.

Glances around, your stomach flipping just slightly at the thought of telling the rest of the hospital. “Well we’re heading to Robby’s office next, just wanting to tell you all before anyone left for the night.” 

Jack leaned against the doorframe. “He’s gonna be mad he wasn’t first to find out.”

Langdon looking like he’s got an idea brewing in his head say, “Well, now that we know, when do we get the reveal party? You know we’re going to throw one, right?"

Laughs softly, shaking your head.

"Wait, what about the wedding?”

"Well we actually want to keep it small, maybe a dozen or so people. Probably soon actually. So maybe now’s a good time to pick out outfits.”

The walk over to Robby’s office was silent. Jack was taking the lead on this one. 

“Hey brother! You heading out of here soon?”

“Stupid bureaucratic bullshit to wrap up first.” He glanced up at you both. “Why do you both look like that?”

“Like what?”

“Like you saw a ghost.”

“Well, we’ve a- kind of have some news to tell you. Pretty big news actually.”

Robby looked over to you. “You’re pregnant, aren’t you?”

You smiled. “How’d you know?”

He started to get up from behind the desk. “Been doing this long enough to tell. Come here you guys.”

He hugged you first. “You’re going to be an amazing mother.”

Then he turned to Jack, pulling him into a hug too.

“Brother, I’m happy for you. You deserve this. All of it.” With his hand on both of your shoulders, he said, “That kids lucky to have you both.” 

“Thanks man, means a whole lot coming from you.” 

“Not to ruin the mood but, the wedding?”

As you walk through the ER, feeling lighter, you catch Jack’s eye again. This time, there’s a quiet reassurance in his expression.

"So, how was that? You feel okay?”

Sighs, smiling softly. “Better than I thought actually. I was scared, but they’re all in. Just feel a lot better about everything now"

Leans in slightly, a knowing look on his face. “Told you. You’re never alone in this."

Smiling as you walk side-by-side. “I know that now.” 

Jack chuckled. “Yeah, the wedding. We’re thinking small. Couple close friends really.”

“Probably sometime soon,” you added. “Before everything gets too crazy.”

Robby smirked. “So you’re telling me you’re going to try and pull off a wedding and prepare for a baby? That’s some serious multitasking.”

“You act like we haven’t worked in this ER for years,” Jack shot back with a grin.

“Fair,” Robby said, raising his hands in surrender. “Just don’t expect me to wear a tux. I’m not sweating through one of those things in a park somewhere.”

You laughed. “Noted. No tux. You’ll be lucky if we even go as formal as khakis.”

Robby leaned back against his desk, arms crossed, still smiling. “I mean it, though—whatever you need, I’m here. Baby stuff, wedding stuff, moral support when the hormones kick in and Jack starts crying about everything little thing.”

Jack rolled his eyes. “I don’t cry man.”

You nudged him playfully. “We’ll take all the help we can get.”

Robby pushed off the desk. “Then consider this my official offer to be whatever you need during the next couple months.”

Jack gave him a look then glanced over at you and took a deep breath. “We really do appreciate it, brother.”

As you two walked out of the office, finger intertwined, you turned to Jack. “What happened to asking him to officiate our wedding?”

“Next time.”

———————————————————————

Planning 

The next morning, the two of you sat on the couch, takeout containers scattered on the coffee table, your laptop balanced between you.

“So,” Jack said, stretching an arm behind your shoulders, “Do we want to get married before you start showing or after?”

You raised an eyebrow. “Are you implying that I won’t look as good with a baby bump?”

He smirked. “The opposite actually. People won’t be able to look away.”

You laughed, nudging him. “Nice save. I think before. I mean always wanted a fall wedding anyway and its the middle of October so why not do this as soon as we possibly can?”

He grinned. “Perfect timing. Fall leaves, crisp air, soft sweaters—you in a dress and me not sweating through a shirt for once.”

You chuckled. “I’m not making any promises about the weather.”

Jack clicked something on the screen. “Okay, so venue, you really want to ask Robby and Collin’s if we can use their backyard?”

“Yeah,” you said, smiling. “She’s already got the twinkle lights and fire pit. It’s cozy and it feels like us.”

He nodded. “And we get built-in charm from the trees turning.”

You reached over and jotted something in the computer. “Add extra blankets. Maybe a hot chocolate bar?”

Jack looked impressed. “That’s dangerously festive.”

“It is October Jack, almost Halloween. Just nothing scary” you said with a grin.

He laughed. “Food?”

“I’m sure we could find a caterer on short notice. But something seasonal—gourmet grilled cheese, tomato soup, maybe even apple cider donuts.”

Jack let out a happy sigh. “Marrying you just keeps getting better.”

You bumped his shoulder. “What about the ceremony? You still want Robby to officiate?”

“Yeah,” he said, without hesitation. “He’s got the right mix of sarcastic and sentimental. I’ll talk to him when we go back to work.”

“You could just call him now, stop procrastinating. You missed your chance last time.”

“Alright, let’s just finish this, then I’ll call.”

You were quiet for a moment, listening to the wind brush the windows. Then Jack asked, “What are you thinking for your dress?”

“Something simple I guess. I don’t know I just always imagined some type of fairy tale wedding in my head. Just going to scale it down into something less magical now.”

“You are magical,” he said, leaning over to kiss your temple. “I’ll wear whatever matches your vibe. Just not a tux.”

“Deal,” you said with a laugh. “And no heels for me. I’m not falling in the grass.”

“God, I love you,” he said, dead serious.

You looked over at him, your heart full. “I love you too.”

He tapped the laptop, eyes back on the screen. “Okay, so: backyard, hot chocolate, donuts, and Robby’s officiating. That’s basically everything.”

You leaned your head on his shoulder. 

“We’re gonna pull off the coziest, most chaotic October wedding ever aren’t we?’

He smiled down at you. “And our kid’s going to hear about it every fall for the rest of their life.”

“Now call Robby.”

Jack had his phone on speaker, resting on the coffee table between you, laptop closed now that most of the planning was done. 

“Is this a medical emergency?” Robby’s voice came through, dry and unmistakably tired. “Because if it is, I’m hanging up.”

Jack smirked. “Nope. No emergencies. Just your favorite engaged couple calling with an exciting proposition.”

There was a beat of silence. “If this is a weird sex thing, I’m hanging up faster.”

“It’s not a sex thing, Robby.”

“Good. Because I’m not that kind of friend. What’s going on?” 

You could hear Collin’s laughing in the background.

Jack leaned forward. “We’ve got the wedding mostly planned. We’re aiming for 2 weeks from now actually. Uh- wanted to know if we could borrow your backyard?”

“And we want you to officiate,” you added, watching Jack’s face light up as you said it.

There was a longer pause this time.

“And I want you to be my best man.”

“You’re serious?”

“Dead serious,” Jack said. “We want someone who knows us. Who’s been through a lot with us. And honestly, someone who won’t turn the whole ceremony into a cheesy rom-com script.”

Robby was quiet for a moment. “Well… shit.”

You smiled. “That a yes?”

“That’s a hell yes to all of it.” he said, voice softer now. “You sure you want me standing up there?”

“We couldn’t picture anyone else,” you said.

“You’ve seen us at our worst,” Jack added. “It makes sense you’d be the one to see us at our best too.”

There was a brief pause before Robby spoke again, and this time, you could hear the emotion just beneath his usual sarcasm.

“I’d be honored. Just tell me what to wear and what not to say.”

“Something warm, and please don’t lead with a joke about our sex life,” Jack said.

“No promises.”

You all laughed, and for a moment it was just easy—friends on a call, something steady and joyful settling into place.

Robby cleared his throat. “Alright. Guess I better start writing something. This kid’s going to want to hear the story someday, right?”

You looked at Jack, who was already looking at you.

“Yeah,” you said softly. “They will.”

After talking for a few minutes, you two hung up.

“Now call Langdon.”

“Why am I calling Langdon?”

“Because he’s obviously going to be your maid of honor.”

“First of all, it’s man of honor, and fine I’ll call him.”

Langdon picked up before the first ring even finished. “Hello my favorite night shift attending.”

“Lang,” you said with a laugh, “Jacks right next to me.”

Jack muffled his face in a pillow, chuckling. Langdon exhaled loudly. “Okay, okay. You’re still my favorite. But what’s up? What can I do for you guys?”

You smiled. “I want you to be my man of honor at the wedding in 2 weeks.”

Silence. Which, for Langdon, was a rare and powerful thing.

“NO. Stop. Are you serious?”

“Very,” you said. “You’ve been in my corner since day one. You’ve heard every doubt, every freak-out, every detail of this whole thing. You held my hand during too many of my bad moments. And I want you to walk me down the aisle.”

There was a sniff on the other end.

“Langdon?” Jack said, raising an eyebrow.

“I’M FINE,” Langdon said, clearly not fine. “I’m just—ugh. Damn it. Why’d you have to make this emotional? I was already picturing myself in navy linen and now I’m crying on my couch in pajamas.”

You smiled. “So that’s a yes?”

“It’s the biggest yes I’ve ever said without a ring involved,” he managed, voice thick. 

“God. You guys are gonna ruin my mascara that day.”

Jack leaned in. “At least it’ll be waterproof, right?”

Langdon scoffed. “Please.”

You all laughed again, and for the second time in an hour, something clicked into place—another piece of your heart, chosen and confirmed.

“I love you both,” Langdon said, softer now. “Thanks for making me part of this.”

“You always were,” you said.

After a few more minutes of chatter and enthusiastic wedding suggestions, Langdon did bring up matching socks to Jack, you hung up.

Jack looked over at you. “Feeling good?”

You nodded. “Feeling really damn good.”

The circle was forming. And with each call, the day felt a little more real, a little more beautiful, and a lot more yours.

———————————————————————

The Day Before 

The night before the wedding, everything felt like it was humming with anticipation—quiet, yet brimming with energy. You both had decided to spend the night and Robby and Collin’s place but, on opposite sides of the house. Though the last few hours had been filled with final touches, decorations, and excited chatter from your friends who’d gathered around to help, there was a peacefulness to it all. 

It was just you now, sitting in bed, the soft glow of the lamp warming the room.

Jack had already gone to bed—he was giving you your space to unwind, but there had been something he wanted you to have before the morning came.

You heard the soft creak of the door behind you.

“Hey,” Jack’s voice, low and careful. “You still awake?”

“Barely,” you answered with a soft smile, catching his reflection in the mirror. He was standing in the doorway, holding something in his hand.

“What’s that?” you asked.

He stepped closer, looking almost hesitant, like he wasn’t sure how to present it. “It’s the note I shoved back in my pocket the day I proposed to you.”

You sat up higher in bed, taking in the sight of him—his silver hair a little messy, his eyes still bright despite the late hour. He had a nervous energy about him, the kind you hadn’t seen in a while.

“What’s in it?” you asked again, your voice quieter now, sensing the significance of the moment.

Jack held up a folded piece of paper, the edges frayed. “I- I actually wrote it right after we met. It’s from when I realized how I felt about you. My therapist wanted me to write down my feelings. I just turned them into a letter.”

You felt your heart skip a beat. "What do you mean? Why didn’t you ever tell me about it?"

“I didn’t want to freak you out,” he said with a little chuckle. “It’s just, I thought maybe it would be something you'd want to read now. I don’t know. Couldn’t give you this in the beginning. You would’ve thought I was crazy.”

He placed the note in your hands and stepped back, giving you space. His gaze never left you as you carefully unfolded it.

The writing was messy, a little rushed, but it was undeniably Jack—the thoughts were raw, honest, and vulnerable in a way you hadn't expected.

Dear You,

I don’t know if you remember the weather that day, or any of the cases you worked or saw. But I can recall every single moment from that initial day. The day that changed everything.

It was a Monday—though in the ER, days of the week don’t mean much. Everything was loud, alarms blaring, overhead pages, a trauma code already in motion. I had just finished his night shift, brain running on caffeine and muscle memory.

Your hair pulled back in a messy braid, eyes locked onto Robby giving the same speech he does to every group of interns.You weren’t trying to be noticed. You stayed to the back of the group. You kept quiet, letting everybody else do all the talking. But something about you made everything in me stop all at once. You smiled at something someone said — a quiet laugh, the kind people save for inside their own mind — and I remember thinking, God, I hope she does that again.

We barely spoke that first day. Just enough for me to hear your voice, just enough for me to wonder how someone I’d never met could already feel so familiar. I didn’t know your name yet. Didn’t know your story, your laugh, your quirks. I didn’t know you were the kind of person who would stay after a code just to make sure your team was okay. That you’d memorize every nurse’s birthday. That you’d carry every loss quietly, but feel every win like it mattered. I told you that your excitement to be here would be short-lived but, just as you always do, you proved me wrong. 

I didn’t fall in love with you all at once. It was slow. I fell more in love every time you called me out when I needed it, and every time you stood next to me when I didn’t deserve it. Every time we passed off patients like a well-rehearsed dance. Every time your shoulder brushed mine at the nurse’s station and it meant more than it should have.

I fell in love with the way you carry your strength—quiet, unshakable. And the way you let yourself fall apart when no one else is looking, trusting me enough to see it. I didn’t realize how deep I was until I couldn’t imagine walking into a trauma bay and not looking for you first. Until every shift without you felt off.

And now, here we are. One night before we promise each other everything. But I think, in a way, I promised you a long time ago. In that first look. In that first nod. In all the moments in between.I don’t need vows to tell you I love you.I’ve been loving you this whole time.

But that day, it’s funny to think we were strangers that morning. Because now I can’t remember what it feels like not to know you. And maybe you didn’t notice anything. Maybe for you, it was just your last medical school rotation. But for me? It was the beginning of the rest of my life.

So, thank you for choosing this hospital. For being exactly who you are, without knowing you were changing someone else’s life just by being in the building.

I think my heart knew you before I did. And it’s been choosing you every single second, minute, and hour ever since. And it will, until the end.

Love,

Dr. Jack Abbott

You smiled softly, brushing your fingers over the handwriting. The words felt like a reflection of everything you’d come to understand about Jack over the years—his deep, unwavering certainty that what you shared was fate.

“I had no idea you wrote this,” you said, voice full of wonder.

Jack shrugged, the smile on his lips softening. “I didn’t want to forget it. And, uh- when I was trying to think of the right words for tomorrow, I thought this was a good place to start.”

Your heart squeezed as you stood, crossing the short distance between you and him. 

You kissed him softly, tenderly, before pulling away just enough to look up at him.

“I think you’ve more than proved it,” you whispered, your hands resting on his chest.

Jack’s hand came up to gently cup your face, his thumb brushing over your cheek. “I meant every word, you know. Still do. I’m still here. And I always will be.”

You rested your forehead against his, eyes closing as a sense of peace washed over you. The weight of the moment, the years that had passed, the future waiting for you both—it all felt perfect.

“I love you,” you whispered.

He smiled again, pulling you in closer. “And I love you.”

You leaned into him, your heart full, your mind racing with everything you’d already been through together. And tomorrow, when you stood in front of everyone, ready to promise forever, this was only the beginning.

“Stay”

He pulled his head back. “What?”

“I don’t care about all the superstitions about seeing each other before I walk down the aisle. I want you to stay with me tonight. Please.”

Jack stepped closer, like he still wasn’t sure if you meant it. “You sure?”

You nodded. 

A pause. Then the softest smile broke across his face.

“Of course I’ll stay with you tonight.”

You lay there in silence for a while, your hand finding his under the sheets.

“You know,” you whispered, “I remember the first time I saw you, too.”

He turned slightly, his breath brushing your hair. “Yeah?”

You smiled into the dark. “You looked exhausted. Like you’d carried the whole ER on your back all night. But you still paused just long enough to see me. No one else did but, you stopped.”

Jack kissed your forehead, and it felt like everything in the world slowed.

“I guess I’ve been stopping for you ever since,” he murmured.

And together, in that borrowed room, you drifted into sleep—not alone, not apart. Just together.

Exactly where you were always meant to be.

———————————————————————

The Wedding Day

The backyard was glowing from the upstairs window. Collins, Mel, and Dana had all helped you get ready. 

Twinkle lights were strung between trees with fiery orange leaves, flickering gently as dusk settled in. The scent of hot chocolate, and woodsmoke hung in the air, mingling with laughter and the soft rustle of shoes over fallen leaves.

You stood in front of the mirror in your dress, the one that you tried on first. You took a deep breath, admiring the way the fabric fell around you, the intricate lace that made the whole thing feel just a little bit magical.

The room had been full of movement and chatter just moments ago. Collins fussing with your veil like she was prepping a sterile field, Mel fixing a rogue strand of hair with the same focus she’d use to suture a laceration, and Dana kneeling at your feet, carefully adjusting the hem of your dress as if it were something sacred.

“You know,” Dana had said with a half-smile as she fastened your bracelet, “this might be the first time I’ve seen your hands not in gloves.”

Mel snorted, still holding a bobby pin between her teeth. “I’m just impressed we got her to sit still for more than three minutes.”

“You try keeping someone still when she’s about to marry Jack,” Collins said, adjusting the veil one last time. “Man looked like he was going to pass out when I saw him downstairs this morning.”

They laughed—and so did you—but there was something underneath it. A shared understanding. These women had been with you through the long nights, the traumas you never talked about, the break room breakdowns and post-shift breakfasts. They knew what it meant for someone like you to find someone like him.

Mel came to your side and offered you a tissue, dabbing the corner of her own eyes with a teasing, “If you cry now, I swear we’re redoing the whole face.”

You laughed—really laughed—and felt the nerves shift. Not disappear, just settle. Like everything else today, you didn’t need perfection. You just needed to be present.

Dana glanced out the window. “Lights are on. They’re ready.”

“Are you?” Collins asked.

You turned back to your reflection—three women behind you, leaves glowing outside the window, and the promise of him waiting just beyond it all.

“I am,” you said, voice strong and sure. “I really, really am.”

They left you so you could have moment to process before going downstairs.

Behind you, no bridesmaids, just Langdon, dressed in a navy suit with a matching pocket square. 

But it was Robby who stood next to you, his eyes soft, his hands steady as he helped you adjust your veil.

“You ready?” he asked quietly, looking you over one last time.

You smiled, a little nervous, a little excited. “I think I am.”

The air felt charged with expectation, and even though you hadn’t seen Jack yet, you could feel him nearby, his presence comforting.

Robby handed you a small, folded piece of paper. “You’ll need this.”

You glanced at it, unsure. “What’s this?”

“It’s the vows you wrote,” Robby said, his voice teasing but affectionate. “Since you were about to forget these upstairs.”

You laughed softly, tucking the note into the pocket of your dress. The warmth of his hand on your arm steadied you. “Thanks, Robby. For everything.”

He gave a rare, soft smile. “Always.”

Outside, you could hear conversation, the last-minute adjustments being made. Your heart raced as you took one more breath, finally feeling the full weight of the moment.

The music shifted, the soft notes of your song playing through the speakers as you took your first step toward the door. You looked at Langdon, who gave you an exaggerated thumbs up, and smiled back.

Then, you stepped into the dwindling sunlight.

Jack stood at the altar, his back straight, his smile crooked as he turned to look at you. 

The crowd was still, waiting. 

The soft rustle of the wind in the trees was the only sound as you walked toward him, every step feeling like it was in sync with your heartbeat.

You locked eyes with him the moment you stepped into view, and it was like time slowed down. His expression was soft, full of love, of awe. You could see the way his lips twitched as he tried not to smile too widely, his eyes welling up just before his tears started to fall.

You took the final steps to stand beside him, your hand trembling slightly as you placed it in his. He squeezed your fingers, grounding you.

Robby cleared his throat before speaking in his usual dry tone, but you could hear the emotion behind it.

“We’re gathered here today to witness and celebrate the union of two extraordinary people. Their journey together has been nothing short of remarkable. It has been filled with laughter, tears, challenges, and triumphs. But today is the moment where you commit to each other in front of the people who love you, to continue building a future together, hand in hand.”

You could feel Jack’s hand tighten around yours, and you turned to him, meeting his gaze.

He glanced between the two of you. “Jack, you once told me you weren’t the marrying type. And then, one night after a shift, you started talking about someone. And you didn’t stop talking about her. For months. I don’t even think you noticed. That was when I knew—this wasn’t just a crush. It was a shift. A reroute. A knowing.”

Then he turned to you, eyes soft. “And you. You always knew who you were. But Jack helped you rest in who you were. You didn’t shrink. You expanded. He made space—and you filled it. With grace, stubbornness, and that exact tone of voice that can make an intern cry and a surgeon back down.”

More laughter.

“But seriously,” Robby said, quieter now. “What you two have, it’s rare. You’ve already seen more life and loss than most couples do in a lifetime. You’ve seen each other covered in blood, exhausted, snappy, sleepless. And yet, you chose softness. You chose coming back. Over and over again.”

“Since you’ll be reading your vows to each other at a later time in private, I guess we can get to the most important part of the day.”

“Jack,” Robby said, turning to him. “Do you take her to be your partner in life, in love, and in all things, to cherish her, to support her, and to continue growing with her every day, no matter what the future holds?”

Jack took a deep breath, his voice steady but filled with emotion as he said, “I do.”

Robby turned to you. “And do you take Jack to be your partner in life, to laugh with him, to comfort him, and to support him, even when it’s hard? To love him fiercely, just as he loves you?”

You felt your chest tighten, but you smiled, nodding as your voice came out a little shaky but clear. “I do.”

Robby smiled, a little choked up himself. “Then, by the power vested in me by the internet, I now pronounce you married. You may kiss the bride.”

The moment Jack leaned in, pressing his lips to yours, everything felt like it fell into place. 

The cheers from your friends and family around you filled the air, but you barely heard them. 

The world, for that moment, was just the two of you—together, as it had always been meant to be.

When you pulled away, your foreheads rested together, and you could feel his heart racing in the same rhythm as yours. The crowd was still cheering, but it was as if you were in your own little world.

Jack whispered, just loud enough for you to hear, “I love you. You were worth the wait.”

You smiled, feeling a warmth spread 

through you. “I love you too. And I always will.”

———————————————————————

After the Ceremony

The reception was everything you could have hoped for. Filled with laughter, stories shared, and friends and family gathered together. There were toasts, dancing, and endless smiles, but underneath it all, the knowledge that you had just taken the first official step of a lifetime together.

Later, as the night wound down and the last of the guests trickled out, Jack found you outside under the stars, admiring what you two had pulled off in just two weeks. He took your hand, pulling you into his arms as you both gazed at the sky.

“I think this was the perfect day,” you whispered. Jack kissed your temple, holding you a little tighter. “It’s only the beginning.”

Your heart knew that everything, all the love and promises, had led to this perfect moment. You had found your person. And together, you would face whatever came next.

And somewhere just beneath the joy and laughter, a tiny flutter in your belly reminded you: the best part was still on the way.

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Hope yall enjoyed this one! Pretty sappy. Think in the next chapter were gonna see how the pregnancy hormones kick in. Don't know, Jack might have a little bit of a pregnancy kink, who knows.

Let me now what you think down below please!