#i am really trying desperately to not actively dislike a character

[scoobydoodean]

I was wondering if you, as a Dean fan have opinions about the different writers? Mostly because I see a lot of Dean fans really strongly dislike Dabb for some reason and I don’t really understand why. I’ve never seen a concrete explanation beyond “he can’t write Dean/doesn’t understand Dean/actively hates Dean” but with no examples as to what he does that’s so bad. And I see this in every shipping lane. I don’t have a strong opinion about him as a writer one way or the other.

I'm exploring this more as I rewatch the show (currently on season 6) so I'll speak mainly from that perspective on my most recent thoughts. I am not a big fan of Dabb or Loflin, but have tried to be fair about things so far when talking through each episode. I am a fan of "Alpha and Omega"—it's my favorite finale (it's also... a finale for a season Carver started as showrunner? So I don't know what the implications are there as far as storyboarding). Also points for having demon Dean stab a guy through in 10.02.

I'll focus on the negatives you asked about in this post, but in the links you'll find me moving the narrative this way and that toward much more charitable readings... I think. (I do have a tag #dabb disk horse which you can either peruse or blacklist at your leisure). What I can tell you is something almost always strikes me as a off about Dabb/Loflin episodes so far in this rewatch in terms of character work.

Dabb/Loflin's first ever episode was 4.06 "Yellow Fever". In the aftermath, Kripke felt the need to release a definitive interpretation of their episode to the public, stating, "Dean is not a dick... he's a hero." The whole episode toyed with, to an extent, the idea that all the victims of the MotW were bullies. You can take this other directions—for example, queer meta, or meta about Sam as the real bully. However, the story a lot of fandom latched onto was that "Dean is a jerk and deserves to be humiliated and punished for that" which obviously didn't make Dean fans watching live in season 4 happy—and this theme of Jerk!Dean continues into their next episode, "After School Special", where they once again parallel Dean with a bully literally nicknamed "Dirk the Jerk" by Sam, and throw what I think is transparent shade at Kripke's issued statement from before the Christmas break (post here)... or maybe they mean to throw shade at the Dean fans who got angry. In this episode, they also make illusions to Dean wanting to have sex with barely legal high school cheerleaders, which also did not ingratiate them to Deanfans at the time. I said on my last rewatch, "In After School Special, Dean seems more unlike himself than any episode ever in the history of Supernatural up to this point" (post explaining that here). I carry similar sentiments about portions of 5.06 "I Believe The Children Are Our Future". Yes—I am aware of performing Dean meta. I just... feel like they try a little too hard. It feels hamfisted—desperate. To the point it doesn't feel like Dean anymore sometimes. In 5.06, they also have Dean (guy who is generally very protective of kids) suggest to Jesse that he'd be good to have in a fight???? I can see how they got there, but again—it just feels... off. The last episode I rewatched that they authored, 6.04 "Weekend At Bobby's", also leaves a bad taste in my mouth—not in what it's trying to do with Bobby or what it's trying to do on a meta level—but once again, with dialogue from Dean that just makes me think "he would not fucking say that" (post here). I think looking at all of these, you can probably see deangirl ire toward Dabb has a long history. It's been around as long as he's been around, whether he deserves as much ire as he gets or not.

I haven't circled back yet on this rewatch, but Dabb and Loflin also penned season 7's "The Girl Next Door"... do I need to say anything specific? Maybe I'll just link my entire #amy tag. What narrative did they want you to get from that episode? Who the fuck knows. And that's often the problem:

When you watch various episodes I've mentioned, you can work around to a meta that tells you something different than you might at first think the page conveys—something hidden and maybe contradictory. The thing is... you could also... not do that? And that wouldn't be so bad, except that sometimes the two narratives you can most easily grasp completely contradict each other. "After School Special" can be an episode that points to Sam's envy of Dean and John deep down and foreshadows Sam becoming a bully, but on a meta level, it also just as easily says Sam becoming a bully is somehow Dean's fault, and Sam is some poor captive baby. Dean is a creep and a bully and a cheater but we should all coddle him because he saw his mom die when he was a child and he's sooo sad. "Yellow Fever" can be a queer meta story and might also foreshadow approaching Bully!Sam in 4.14, but it also very much does call Dean a jerk (should we take that seriously? should we not?) and implies Dean should be punished for the outcome of three decades of reality-bending torture. Even if it's a queer meta underneath... it's just as easily one about how closeted men should be humiliated for cowardice or how being closeted turns you into an asshole.

Jumping way ahead, I have to mention 15.10 "The Hero's Journey" just because. Yes, it is full of jokes and Garth goodness, but also tries to sell you the story that nothing about Sam and Dean is real, to a degree that feels like you are being flipped the bird for ever watching this show. And again—you can make meta that it's all a ruse! But is it? Or is Dabb actually just telling you to go fuck yourself? Like he totally wasn't when, after the SPN finale when fans were Not Happy™️, he tweeted a sign reading, "Don't feed the baboons"? Yet again—we play into the motif of the "hero" who isn't a hero at all but some pathetic loser who deserves to be publicly humiliated, bookended with Dabb's opening episode in his opening season. I'm not saying that's what it is on purpose—but I am saying you can make these arguments easily, and that leaves me consistently annoyed with Dabb for being fucking sloppy and leaving me to deal with some of the most insufferable meta imaginable that carries little support outside of episodes written by Dabb or the Dabb/Loflin writing team.... Yes—I am in fact saying that Dabb and Loflin's hamfisted episodes (regardless of their intentions) are largely responsible for some of the most insufferable, loathesome fandom metas about Sam and Dean's relationship around.

Look at 5.16 "Dark Side Of The Moon", and 7.08 "Time for A Wedding!" and 8.14 "Trial and Error", 11.17 "Red Meat", and 15.20 "Carry On". Along with 4.13, while they might or might not say something deeper or contradictory on a meta level, on a surface level, every single one of these episodes sows the narrative that Dean is needy and clingy and needs Sam more than Sam needs him—something I intensely disagree with for a multitude of reasons... but I'll just link this. Many of these episodes also follow a surface level narrative of "normal life obsessed Sam" (and here I'll link my entire #sam the hunter tag and #in which sam is not a helpless little waif with his hands cast over his eyes being carried along by the tides of the immutable sea). When I look at this episode list, I also don't find it at all difficult to believe that Dabb wanted Dean to die in the finale. There is nothing at all shocking about that. And yes—you can argue he's pointing to the opposite—that this fate should be subverted and that's what makes 15.20 the dark ending, but I think you can just as easily argue that yes it's a dark ending and yes Dabb has always dreamed of this ending. A "tragic" ending where Dean dies and Sam goes on to have a white picket fence... while also leaving you little hints along the way that maybe it's all a big ruse because how could he not? He never has to explain anything. Someone else will pick up the story and make it make sense. He's already fucked off to piss all over fans of Resident Evil.

That said, when I mention what I feel is off character work, I mainly mention Dabb/Loflin episodes from my recent rewatch, which suffer from the two of them being newer to the series (coming onto the writing team in season 4) and also leave questions about whether, perhaps, they had conflicting ideas about characterization. Was Dabb the one penning these lines? Was it Loflin? Was it both? Did they trade out who took the lead? I didn't really say anything negative about "Sam, Interrupted" or "Jump the Shark"... (though "Sam, Interrupted" also calls Dean "codependent") who wrote those? Is it possible that the messiness of the meta comes down to two writers at war? I have to imagine though, that they got along, or else they wouldn't have written together for four fucking years. If they didn't get along...? My mind always comes back to their first solo episodes, right after splitting up in season 8. Dabb's first solo episode is "Hunteri Heroici"—the only episode to lend any perspective to season 8 Sam's reasons for abandoning everyone—paralleling him checking out with Fred's catatonia, which Sam has to save Fred from. It is the only episode that lends Sam sympathy in the early part of the season. He follows it up with "Trial and Error"—where Sam promises to save Dean from suicidal thoughts. Loflin's first solo episode is what I would regard as the most scathing solo episode commentary on Sam in the entire series—"Citizen Fang". Then he writes again right after Dabb's "Trial and Error"—penning "Remember The Titans" where Sam tells Dean to get over the promise Sam so passionately made in Dabb's episode and face reality.

This is why we're exploring this rewatch.

DISCLAIMER: Now I just devolve into bitching because I'm writing at 3AM. Proceed at your own risk.

It seems like these days, everyone demands an explanation for disliking Dabb (something about some sort of destiel battle... I don't know what that flamewar is and I don't give a damn tbqh.) I guess I've just been wondering what's actually so great about him. Because it feels like people have overcorrected to basically acting like he's god's greatest gift to mankind. People point to how meta his episodes can be, but I think other writers easily best him on that front on multiple occasions (particularly enjoyed by me so far on this rewatch: 3.10 "Dream A Little Dream Of Me", 4.04 "Monster Movie", 4.12 "Criss Angel Is A Douchebag"), and without leaving their meaning so up in the air that you don't even know what the hell they were actually trying to tell you because there are two different completely incongruous narratives you could just as justifiably claim were the intended one. Some people may find that duality praise-worthy. I don't. I find it sloppy—and when I add in mediocre character work, I just land on the side of him being, at the very best, mid.

Add him in as showrunner, you have... at least two of my least favorite seasons (13 and 15). Add that he's a one-trick pony in terms of the Sam and Dean conflicts mentioned above that he continuously rehashes rather than come up with anything new or fresh, and the same conflicts between Dean and Cas being played out until they both die (shut UP I'm not talking about canon destiel as the alternative—I am literally just asking for more diverse conflicts). I can't say I understand what I''m supposed to find so impressive.

(Before anyone so much as breathes this near me, Berens also sucks and I am going to tear off your nose hairs if you start bringing him up as if disliking Dabb for some reason means wearing rose colored glasses about Berens. Berens can eat a whole cactus raw over "The Trap" alone.)

[bambi-kinos]

i honestly wouldn’t care so much about omegaverse if people were just honest about how it’s a porn genre instead of insisting how it’s queer activism. especially on twitter there’s a weird group of people who think its the pinnacle of feminism to make men suffer through patriarchy but poorly thought out patriarchy and omegaverse sidelines women constantly (though i’ve seen fair share of female centric omegaverse but those don’t seem to push the activism view and feels more like it’s a porn genre, but the dog dick thing is still uncomfortable) another thing about the activism thing people push is about how omegaverse is actually really liberating for trans men or whatever as a blanket statement. don’t care if other trans men like omegaverse but i certainly don’t think omegaverse is reflective of the ftm experience. especially since all the characters are presumably cis in the stories even if they’re sometimes written with vaginas in universe it doesn’t matter! this is why the “if you dislike omegaverse you’re queer phobic” mindset drives me crazy. i’m sorry if this ask is really long i feel vindicated that other people find omegaverse a terrible genre ive disliked it for years, i can tolerate some stories but i can never take it seriously.

HAHA. Yeah this is a good summation of where I am at as well. The thing is omegaverse has always been up its own ass just a little, in Strange Aeons oral history of Dashcon someone at the con had made a presentation about omegaverse that said "omegaverse has six genders, here's what the six genders are" and it was about relating these fictional six genders to the IRL queer experience? Or at least that's how i interpreted it from the video. And the thing is this was almost at the very beginning of omegaverse as a trend and users were already trying to gentrify it into something that it isn't.

IMO omegaverse appeared at the same time that tumblr slacktivism was being heavily criticized. Don't know if anyone else remembers this but there was a viral tumblr post that had British protestors out with placards and signs and they were protesting in favor of gay marriage, and one of the signs said "let John and Sherlock get married." And the tumblr post absolutely exploded because people were mad (for good reason) that someone was bringing their fandom attitudes into IRL activism. And people were mad because gay marriage was something was desperately needed for legal protection and there was a lot of outrage that a fujoshi instead decided to make it about Johnlock, because that was the only way she could relate to gay marriage activism.

The problem though is that this viral post was like, a nuclear bomb in the tumblr consciousness. The website never recovered. That's where the idea of "minority representation" took off, because fujoshis were bullied and made to feel ashamed of liking gay ships and were accused of being "slacktivists" by writing fanfiction or whatever, even when we were not actually interested in doing activism. (I think some poor idiots tried to say that "writing slash fanfic means I'm fighting for gay rights" which got skewered.) So the idea of "representation" was dreamed up as a response to it, because no one likes being accused of being a ~fetishizer~. Saying "well actually me writing this fanfiction is good because I'm being Representational" was a way to politically justify your gay cocks rubbing together fetish. Tumblr was totally overrun with keyboard slacktivists screaming at and bullying each other over gay ships which made the "representation" and "fanfiction as queer activism" thing really take off. It was really just a way to avoid being bullied and in many ways it still is.

And while all of this was going on, omegaverse was born! So maybe in hindsight it did not stand a chance, no one wanted to admit that they just had a fetish for werewolves and noncon because that would get them bullied. Like I cannot stress enough that I was in Ground Zero for this shit so I remember when omegaverse fans were fielding accusations of "fapping to bestiality" and other horrible fucked and untrue things. So they were desperate, absolutely DESPERATE to put a respectable coat of paint on their porn so that Tumblr would stop bullying them for it. (There was a scat component to it as well but that wasn't as prominent as the bestiality themed noncon that came out of it. And I mean...both of those things are fine because it's fiction, so whatever, but it's not shocking that anything that was adjacent to those things would get pushback.)

In a way, fans did not have a choice except to pretend that the porn was actually Queer Empowerment and Feminist Empowerment and how it was Totally Liberating to read about men with dog dicks raping other men with anal fissures. They had to do it in order to protect themselves. This resulted in entire essays being written about how being anally impregnated by a guy with a dogdick who "ruts" like an animal is, like, suuuuuch a female experience you guiz!!!!!!! We gorls have all been there amirite!!!!! And if you didn't take that view and said "who is 'we' in this equation, you're not affiliated with me and I don't recognize these experiences" you received some online hate for Not Being With the Feminist Cause. In time that has metastasized and now there are omegaverse fans who, as you indicate, decided to start bullying other queer people people for not liking it.

(And you know, as I'm editing this, I'm realizing just how insanely transphobic that kind of stance was! Incredible erasure of trans people took place in those "why Omegaverse is the peak of feminism" essays.)

The lesbian omegaverse stuff is basically the purest form of it and hence it's the most tolerable. Yuri fiction gets so little attention anyway, yuri writers basically have carte blanche to do whatever they want. There's very little infighting in comparison to slash fandoms. Funnily enough when women are involved as characters no one wants to read about the Feminine Political Experience and no one cares enough to turn it into activism. It's only slash ships that get that projection and its 100% due to the "oh shit we need to pretend this is Representation so that we don't get bullied for having a fetish" deal. (This has since spread into most aspects of fandom and even IRL discourse! Do what you will with that information.)

Massive +1 to your note about how it affects queer people. I can't imagine what it's like to be a transman and be told "umm ackchually sweaty being impregnated with a dog cock is the HEIGHT of the transman experience and if you don't like it then you can get out." When I was weirded out by the book I cataloged that was an omegaverse romance, one of the rhetorical lines that got flung at me was "straight people aren't going to like you!!! they're always going to hate you!!!! you're never going to not be disgusting to them!!! you have to like it or else you're a bad queer person!!!" Because I had said that I found the material grotesque and I didn't like it being marketed as "LGBT fiction."

But that was never the point, the point was that I, a queer person, do not want this material anywhere near me. Like, why would I want to be associated with bestiality, even if it's fantasy bestiality? This ain't about the cishetties, this is about me, how I feel. I don't want to be told that it's inherently queer fiction and queer romance, because why would I want dog penises and the captivating aroma of poopy buttholes (sorry, "slick") to be associated with my queerness and my sexuality?

But those are the wages of omegaverse being born in the times that it was born in. It's most likely permanently baked into the structure, even when people are just wilding out with their Ids and going "oh teehee I forgot to take my suppressants and now my reproductive anal glands need to be expressed." You are still going to get the "my werewolf themed fanfiction is ACTIVISM, we are HERE we're QUEER and you need to GET OVER IT" even when you yourself are queer and have been persecuted for it in the past. Either jump on the dogdick carousal or you're queerphobic.

I should underline that I understand that this is quite literally a Not All Fans Situation and imo most users in fandom try not to get on each other's cases so much about our preferences. The problem is that omegaverse has been a vehicle for buckwild levels of cope, junk science, SJW themed bullying, and superiority complexes because there are a plurality of fans that are trying to gentrify weird porn. And that's the sticking point in all of this especially if you're someone who doesn't like it and want to stay away from it.

[mdhwrites]

Continuing with your thoughts on Belos and the non-characters of the protagonists, as I was watching WaD I realized I was rooting for Belos rather than the main character and I wanted your thoughts on that.

Although Belos' character needs the improvements you mentioned, he at least still has agency, in that he is moving the plot along through action rather than reaction.

He has a definable goal (genociding all witches) backed by clear motivations (puritanical belief system; a witch caused him to accidentally kill his brother). He has a plan to accomplish this (rising to imperial power; creating grimwalkers to bring his brother back to life) and yet still experiences setbacks (day of unity foiled; grimwalkers always betray him). He is no less determined, and suffers for his beliefs (rotting body; traumatic hallucinations) while he aims to recoup his losses and finally accomplish his ultimate goal (first attempting to possess the Collector and failing, then attempting to possess the Titan and succeeding)

In short, Belos is a more compelling protagonist than Luz, who has things happen to her without her input (her palisman hatching, Amity telling her how to get out of the Collector's dreamworld, the Titan explaining how she can win still, etc). Also, as you said, by the end of S3 she is at her most unlikable, making us less sympathetic to her. She has no personal goals of her own that connect to her as a character beyond desperately wishing to be accepted by others, which makes her out to be more of a people-pleaser than anything (read: a flaw).

I love Luz, I really do. But she could have been more than what she became. She wasn't allowed to have an impact on the plot, and I regret that. Literally any other main character could take her place and the outcome of the finale wouldn't budge a nudge. It ended up making me root for the villain over the actual protagonist, and that seems like a pretty big problem for a show.

Okay, I try to mostly do my asks mostly in order so this has been long overdue. Let's fix that. *cracks neck* Though... Really for that big statement... This isn't one I have a great into. I've made it clear that while I dislike Luz, I actually find her easier to talk about than Belos. That I personally could never root for him because I find anything good about him to be posturing that the show not only doesn't back up but actively undermines. That a good performance and some good lines don't make up for the fact that nothing he does really has a proper impact on anything or anyone. Worse yet, I've already talked about how people really need to stop asking for 'proactive' protagonists because they're not really a thing and commonly DEEPLY detrimental to your story. So... What am I supposed to say here? Simple: Let's talk about payoff. Because at the point where you're rooting for the villain, it's because you know that they can provide a bigger, more shocking payoff than the characters and that what they have been doing, the enjoyment they have been providing, hasn't been working. Because, especially with a racist fuck like Belos, you aren't rooting for him to win. You're rooting for him to genuinely come one second from the brink of winning. This is where sheer entertainment is actually kind of a big deal. 'The Rule of Cool' exists for a reason. If it looks badass enough, has enough production value and has you screaming at the top of your lungs, SOMETHING is going right. In my opinion, this is actually why I like Michael Bae's first Turtles Movie (I saw it in the break room while working at Walmart) because yes, they destroy physics. They survive shit they shouldn't. It has some really dumb shit in it but it is ALL fun. It couldn't pump the breaks even if wanted to because they ripped them out five years ago because YOLO MOTHERFUCKERS! This is a level of entertainment that TOH understood in S1 and seemed to lose until the finale of S3. It's part of why the magic being so boring matters because I'd overlook plotholes more if the magic inciting the plotholes was more fun. It's actually maybe the ONE kindness I'll give Eslewhere Elsewhen because the time portals get some good gags when they're first introduced and I'm not going to deny that. But how about Looking Glass Ruins? It's actually a perfect showcase of when this principle works and when it doesn't. Gus' retcon on illusion is dog shit. It is one of the worst, blatant choices with the magic system. But MAN that ending sequence with Gus! Does it make sense? Not really with just how ludicrously, stupidly powerful it does paint Gus. Does it make you actively question why he spent all of S1 doing jack and shit? Yes. Is it one of the best sequences in The Owl House and genuinely lives up to how terrifying the reality of Illusion magic is? ABSOLUTELY. It's why while I hate the glyph stuff in that side of the episode, I can't hate his plotline entirely because it's just a great fantasy sequence with some good use of horror elements.

But uh... What about that Amity and Luz plot? It's an extremely basic forbidden section, it makes no sense once you find out the head librarian is a chill stoner dude and the payoff is just a cheek kiss for Luz who incited the problem in the first place. She gets it for getting Amity's job back in a high stakes, dangerous adventure... That's off screen. If you're a Lumity shipper, you eat well enough to make up for the fact that really all they do is stand around and talk with multiple backgrounds behind them the entire episode, not even entirely making sense during those moments (this is actually pretty much the ONLY episode where Amity acts dumb because of Luz. Amity doesn't make enough mistakes in the series to justify that line, potent as it is. This is also the only time she's faced actual consequences for her closeness to Luz.) Worse yet, you're robbed of the adventure and potential comedy that is theoretically the core of the show for the sake of cute, gay panic. And I like gay panic but I also kind of want to see this book dragon. One of those is creative while the fact that it's a book mouse instead of a book worm is all that's special about "This creature eats documents and then can broadcast them." And you know... That's an episode where all the payoffs still work. THE ENTIRETY OF S3 IS ABOUT PAYOFFS THAT DON'T WORK.

Luz's angst? I've talked at length about how dog shit her character finish is and that dominates SO MUCH TIME? And what do you get for it? Stringbean? A character people rightfully were pissed about being way too special and not making any sense? And still reflects poorly on Luz's character finish by being literally the opposite of what she's talking about? I did a whole blog on this too.

How about Hunter being a Grimmwalker? We get one conversation with Gus and I guess Hunter getting possessed and then getting magic, one moment that is laughably short frankly and does NOT fix the issues with Hunter's 'arc' and I still despise him getting magic through his best friend dying because it meant we'd NEVER get anything interesting out of him not having his own magic and that's without getting into anything about disability allegories. Oh, and yeah, HIS BEST FRIEND DIED AND WE JUST HAVE TO MOVE ON FOR TIME. Belos' backstory? Entirely wasted to the point where people's frustrations with it come up like once a week in my Discord because it seemed to so clearly be building up to something only for Belos to come right back around to being a dumb, boring, racist villain with nothing more interesting to him. How about villains before Belos? Well, the Collector is poorly written, makes no sense and is written like he's actually five instead of five thousand. Kikimora is the only other villain and she should have been gone so long ago and what does she lead to? Another mech fight? Who we don't even get to see beaten but instead the bully character who has been literally nothing but a joke for over a season assures as she finally got put in her place. This is writing that from a viewer standpoint is ETERNALLY infuriating. You're waiting for something to happen and the closest you get for two specials, effectively four-five episodes of the show, is Willow angst about her magic and feelings in a way that hasn't been true to her character in literally two seasons. If ever. For a character who is 90% plot device for other characters.

Honestly, at that point wanting them all dead and to see the villain win, just for the sheer shock and brutality of it all, seems kind of reasonable when you can't expect anything satisfying from the heroes. I'd argue, in my opinion, they even fucked up Belos' death for a really bad jab at fucking Steven Universe. HOW MANY SHOWS DO YOU THINK REDEEM THE FINAL BAD!? It's a lot less than you seem to think Owl House so why don't you shut up, especially after you REDEEMED THE COLLECTOR AND DID NOTHING WITH HIM! That's not even a joke. They come up with a contrivance so he can't do shit and then he fucks off. Why? Don't fucking know. Maybe the writers realized that a childish god is really hard to write around and should have given it more thought. Like... Anyone who just couldn't give a fuck by the time they're fighting Dragon Belos, especially once Luz is just given a super form so it's time for the victory lap after she didn't have to work that hard to beat the Collector (that's the impression I've been given since NO ONE talks about the Collector's redemption. Literally the only scene I've seen from that part of the episode is Luz playing with Amity's face.) so the stakes are rock bottom already. And boy, the jokes of the episode don't help with it. The fact that it's callback after callback is cute and good for a finale but how many of these jokes are robbing any momentum of the moment? Fucking everything to do with the Collector in the finale seems to be this way where it's like "Hahaha. Okay now let's actually back to the point." Even when he's trying to be serious like not understanding death, I'm sitting here going "Okay but you wanted to play with corpses and grind bones. You don't get to do this shit and not piss me off." So wanting to just make everyone shut up through Belos winning? I can get it. I definitely wouldn't but I didn't watch S3 for a reason because I recognized that with how everything was written up to it and ESPECIALLY after the first special, I wouldn't enjoy any of it. Not when its only payoffs are in fanservice and romance instead of its magic, adventure, comedy, narrative, characters... You know: Technically all the things it pitched in its beginning. It pitched by claiming to be a professional, animated, comedy adventure. So why not root for Belos? You'll get just as much rooting for him as any other part of the show. +++++++

I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead, If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

And finally a Twitter you can follow too!

[hetchdrive]

SLEEPOVER SATURDAY YAYYYY I have 2.

1. Because I’m still stuck in fucking Texas, top 3 best US states

2. Top potential AU’s for The Terror

Oh noooooo wishing you a speedy departure tomorrow!

I've lived a lot of places and done a lot of road tripping and without further details on which to define "best" I'm going to go with the three states I feel the most personal connection to and say Wisconsin, Minnesota, Michigan. I love Lake Superior, I grew up in that area and sometimes I am very homesick for it. I've been trying to develop the same feeling of connection to the landscape in New England since transplanting and I'm not going to lie, it is rough going. I keep saying I am going to try to get into hiking and rock identification so I can see the mountains and maybe 2024 is the year I buckle down and do that.

First off: Star Trek AU obviously. I'm really bad at coming up with plots and writing long fics but I am beginning to take notes for a Star Trek AU in case the Terror SciFi Fest happens again this upcoming May.

Secondly: Ghosts/spiritualism/haunted house AU. While I do enjoy a good modern AU from time to time, to me part of the draw of The Terror is the time period it is set. I am fascinated by the Victorian era, the advances in medicine during the time period, the rise in popularity of ghosts and ghost stories, and I think I'd get a lot of enjoyment out of researching to write an AU that takes advantage of this somehow.

Also, I am obsessed with haunted houses as they are used to represent familial trauma, codependence, grief and loneliness, etc etc, and I think it would be fun to take Crozier out of The Horrors only to put him into a different flavor of The Horrors <3

Lastly: Musicians/orchestra AU. Gonna be honest, I do not have any of the requisite knowledge to write this and it does not interest me enough to do this research. I want somebody else to write this so I can read it. However, I saw a post once that was the show writer going through and saying what each character's job would be if they lived in the modern day and what he said about Fitzjames was that he'd be a surgeon or somebody else with very specialized knowledge, someone who is the best at something. And while yeah, a specialist surgeon is this, and specialist surgeons are, in my experience, divas with complexes, for reasons of personal taste (dislike of the medical field irl and preference for show contemporary AUs over modern ones) I think it would be more interesting to just skip over the medical layer and make Fitzjames a diva with a complex.

This man plays the violin and he is the best at it and he and Crozier cannot stand each other because Crozier has been playing longer, does not care about the limelight, and actively scorns Fitzjames for doing so. I just have this idea in my head of Fitzjames saying to someone else that Crozier plays a perfectly serviceable, workmanlike violin, but he obviously doesn't truly care for it, he doesn't play with any passion, and Fitzjames who has been doing this his whole life and made it his whole life, the only thing he's ever been good at that he's had to hang all his hopes on, finds that intolerable. Meanwhile Crozier cares about the violin very deeply but doesn't really show it to anybody and keeps to himself because loving music and loving your coworkers are two different things.

Additional inspiration for this idea is the fact that when Phantom of the Opera shut down on Broadway a couple months ago (last year? What is the passage of time...) I saw a news article about it which said some of the people in the orchestra had been playing the show together since it started running in 1986. The drama within that pit must have been insane and I desperately want to read about it.

[irishseaweed]

FALLOUT 4 COMPANION SPOILERS

(And some small lore spoilers)

Anyway, I am a whore. As such, and since Fallout 4 has no negative repercussions for doing so, I have romanced (basically) every romanceable companion in Fallout 4. I have a lot of opinions. I will be ranking the romanceable companions here, with short reasons as to why they've been ranked as such. A follow-up post will include my little fashion makeovers for said companions.

Honorable Mention : Magnolia (one-night stand only, the game doesn't allow more than that. I actually finished romancing Piper *immediately* after leaving Magnolia's room the morning after, funny enough. But still, an interesting side character voiced by the original live action Wonder Woman, what's not to like?)

Disqualification : Paladin Danse (requires siding with the Brotherhood of Steel and FUCK those assholes straight to hell Im not doing that)

NOW THEN :

1. Curie. The second to last companion I romanced, but my favorite. Her storyline about learning to grapple with synth/human emotions and survival needs, experiencing the Wasteland for the first time, and growing into her own person is great. Plus, you get multiple dialogues that include Flirting options- and unlike other companions, each of those dialogue sections includes TWO flirting opportunities rather than just one. Flirting with Curie also makes her adorably flustered. She's also super polite to the other companions, and the Combat Medic perk can save your life in a pinch. Normally I find a french accent slightly obnoxious, but for her it sounds nice.

2. Hancock, mayor of Goodneighbor, the second companion I romanced. Compelling character, great default outfit, enables chaos and chems, solid backup with his shotgun, fun dialogue all around (and that voice tho)... you can't really go wrong with Hancock. The Isodoped perk only adds to the benefits of not using radiation protection in the Glowing Sea, pair with the Ghoulish perk to embrace the nuclear waste.

3. Piper, the first companion I romanced. Her drive for investigation and truth-seeking is inspiring, she's compassionate, she has that little nickname "Blue" for the player-character, she helps you get connected to important characters like Nick Valentine, she gives you sweet rolls... just all-around a really positive presence in a wasteland full of cynics and nihilists. With a highly Charisma-based build, ESPECIALLY in early-game, her Gift of Gab xp boost perk was phenomenal.

3 (yes its a tie). Cait, my third romance. Her tragic backstory and struggle with addiction make for an extreme level of character depth some companions just can't keep up with. Plus, a little spiteful violent fun now and then keeps things interesting. Enabled some of my more questionable decisions, like doping up and melee-brawling a behemoth to death. I like the level of detail that her likes and dislikes around drugs and alcohol shift after her quest. The Trigger Rush perk can be a lifesaver if you're struggling at the end of a close fight.

4. Macready, the fourth companion I romanced, migrant from Fallout 3's Capital Wasteland. Good for ammo in a pinch, didn't mind my occasional thievery, but he's got some flaws. I didn't even know for sure his wife was out of the picture until the conversation where I actively finished Romancing him, and having him galavant around with me while his sick (though waiting to be cured thanks to me) son was god knows where with no family to watch him makes me feel a little guilty. His Killshot perk combined with the railroad Deliverer makes stealthy assassinations much easier, though.

5. Preston "Another Settlement" Garvey. Fuck you Preston Garvey. The last character I romanced and by far the worst. You only flirt with him once before fully romancing him, and he responds with all the passion of a wooden 2x4. Even his Romance dialogue is mostly about how he used to want to kill himself which is just trauma dumping out of nowhere to desperately try to give Garvey any depth at all. Hell, every other companion has a Thoughts dialogue option and a Relationship check-in dialogue option, but PRESTON has "Chat" instead of "Thought" and it uses the same stock few lines as if you choose "Relationship" instead. Plus having him as a companion makes talking to him to complete and receive Settlement quests that much more difficult because sometimes he just won't do those conversations. I hate him. I am going to keep him in Sanctuary to keep an eye on him, but he will not be stationed in the area where the rest of the romanced companions are. He does not deserve a seat at the table, a place in the bed. BUT his unique perk is handy when fighting large groups, so romancing him wasn't a *total* waste of time. Plus, he was by far the fastest to romance, so at least I got it over with quickly. Do like 8 or 9 of those little five-minute settlement quests and he'll be begging to fuck.

[bigboobshaunt]

👑🐳👊🧚👍

This took me really long to respond because I am The Indecisive

👑 Favorite version of Zelda?

Honestly really hard to pick just one. I like BotW/TotK Zelda a lot because she has such a fantastic arc and you really feel for her and her story plus I find her very relatable...

Spirit Tracks Zelda is easily among my favorites too, her being a ghost and your companion makes her SO unique and she's really funny and cute and has one of the best relationships with her Link, and she also gets to shine in combat, too!

Skyward Sword Zelda also set the standard for her backstory and I think she's so likable but I do wish we saw more of her in general...

Ocarina of Time Zelda had such a cool story what with messing with forces she didn't necessarily understand while trying to plot against Ganondorf even though she was just a kid, not to MENTION the Sheik reveal which is just iconic tbh.

Both for Hyrule Warriors and Wind Waker I don't have much to say in general about them but I still really like their take charge, more active attitudes! I do hate how they lighten Tetra's skin color and remove her from being active in the plot when the reveal comes though... you hate to see it!

Twilight Princess Zelda... what can I say, she is an elegant sapphic icon and she will always be famous. I was a bit ticked off when they changed out her for ALBW Zelda in Smash because I think she is much more memorable.

I would be remiss not to mention Wand of Gamelon Zelda at least a lil' bit too... Idk she's cute and cheesy and I'm not sorry for including her. Maybe if Nintendo made her actually playable in their games I wouldn't have to do it but 💅

🐳 If you were a Zelda character, what race would you be?

Probably a Hylian boringly enough but I would kill to be one of those occasional enemies that does their own thing for some reason, like... I could be a wolfperson who can't eat their yogurt until you trade me a spoon for my boomerang or whatever.

👊 Favorite Zelda Villain/Boss?

Villain-wise, I love Hilda... she was clearly in the wrong but my god I can completely understand the desperation... Twinrova also I ALWAYS adore seeing whenever they pop up - I love me some comically evil grannies. Ghirahim and Yuga heard "slay" and said "this has multiple meanings and I'll do all of them," and honestly Ganon(dorf) is super cool always but I particularly enjoy his portrayals in ALttP, OoT, WW and TP. Shoutout to Veran and Onox too for variety's sake.

Too many cool bosses to mention but Koloktos is still my fave.

🧚 Favorite Zelda companion?

Uh-Oh... Here's the thing about me - I'm an Annoying Companion Enjoyer (tm) and I don't think I dislike any of them, even the infamous ones. Navi is my girl she was just trying to help and everyone attacks her and attacks her and attacks her... ungrateful behavior.

Tatl is so iconic and funny, I will always be mad they kinda toned down her mean girl-ness in the 3DS remake, even though I get that some of it was for accessibility reasons since a lot of her og comments just weren't helpful at all lmao... tho I think they could have struck a better balance.

Ciela is SO underrated, honestly. She had a good arc and I love her bickering with Linebeck so much.

Midna has the best story out of all of them and everything about her is excellence from her design to her attitude to her relationship with Link and Zelda... ugh she is so good, I miss her.

I've already said my piece about Zelda in Spirit Tracks BUT WHO CARES, HER AGAIN!!!

Fi is the only one who actually made me sob in real life from her last scene and I really enjoy her design and her dances and I genuinely think people forget how sassy she could be sometimes, not to mention being the actual Master Sword - I was ecstatic when they hinted at her existence again in BotW and TotK :)

👍 Favorite Zelda Headcanons?

The Triforce being in flux and changing aspects between its wielders in some games, like Zelda in BotW potentially holding Courage since her key scene was going up alone against Calamity Ganon and Link's usage of the runes and primary association with Blue could tie to him bearing Wisdom in them. If not just headcanon, I think it's a prime idea for fan content.

This one also maybe doesn't count as a headcanon per se but... the Zelda Timelines... I greatly enjoy speculating around them but I do believe taking it too seriously is generally just bunk. I don't think even the developers take them as a wholly 100% accurate and important deal and I think that's actually completely fine. I am an ALttP->Link's Awakening->Oracle Games truther btw.

[wanderlust-in-my-soul]

My Weekly Roundup CW 29

This week was full of drama, people disappearing from other people's lives, evil antagonists, good acting and a lot of good communication. I loved so much about this weeks episodes and before I'll start, let me tell you "Team Roommates for the win!".

And yes, this will contain spoilers!

→ 1. Be My Favorite (Ep 9)

Okay, so not quite as much fluff as I had hoped for, but it was enough for me in the end. I thought the conversations were very well done again and a drunken pisaeng is just ADORABLE!

Kawi is on his way to finally understand that he can't save every future. He needs to have faith in people to go their own way. It is not in his hands that other people won't make mistakes and have no regrets. He will continue to make mistakes himself, but he can try to be the best version of himself to be there for the people he cares about. He won't protect them from getting hurt though, but he can be there for them, catching them before they fall so they can go off and make other mistakes. But it's not up to him to make the decisions about what makes a person happy and what doesn't. And I love that he has Pisaeng as a partner by his side, that he also clearly told him he wants to be able to see them both as equals so that Pisaeng's money doesn't create a power imbalance and I love it so much! I love their communication so much 😭 I hope Paer can work things out with her mom and maybe talk to her dad. Kwan and Paer both desperately need to realize their own worth and just keep their hands off Not. He should end up reap the fruits of being an asshole in the end. Please let an asshole character just be an asshole for once.

☼ 2. Wedding Plan (Ep 1)

I vibe this series so much! Oh my god! I saw the trailer and knew this series was going to captivate me. I'm into this forbidden love. Nuea is my spirtit animal! I find his love for food and dislike for gyms very relatable. I knew it wasn't going to be a classic cheating story, but am still a bit confused by how active Yiwa is in helping Lom flirt with Nuea. I'm definitely curious to see what exactly is behind the two of them and their marriage, and if a wedding between Nuea and Lom will happen in the end. That the visuals will be good in a Mame series is kind of a law, so I'm not surprised by the cast, but this birthmark on Lom's nose has a certain effect on me that I didn't know was possible. I mean look at him!

Normally I'm always a little restrained in the first episode of series, but here I'm just on fire and I apparently have to make that known, otherwise it eats me up inside 😅 I find it funny to see how he majority on here went off on PrapaiSky's wedding, and every little piece of them and PayuRain was giffed and I couldn't care less. But I am very happy to see a gay wedding! So yeah, I can't wait for the next episode! But the subtitles really are something else on iQiyi!

But you would definitely be famous for having a crush on a broom!

↑ 3. Stay With Me (Ep 9-12)

Oh man, so much has happened. First Su Yu and Wu Bi move in together, because Su Yu's dad got married and now has a new family, so to speak, in which Su Yu doesn't want to force himself in. And he wishes so much it was different, but after the mother has found a new family and the father has now also remarried, it has once again become clear to him that he also wants someone whose love is just for him and that he doesn't have to share with anyone 😭 And Wu Bi sits there and just looks at him with these puppy dog eyes and holds him by the arm - there is this person, you just have to finally admit it to yourself too. Yes, and then we see moments where Su Yu uses Wu Bi's butt as a pillow and they're bickering together and their apartment is so wonderfully colorful and lovingly decorated and welcoming and just beautiful and I'm floating through all the seventh clouds...

... and then along comes the evil ex who isn't actually an ex but acts like she is and tries to get in between Wu Bi and Su Yu and apparently she's somewhat successful at it and my gosh, what a pain in the ass that person is! I can't stand her. Great actress but such a crappy character. I hope Su Yu sees through her lies and obvious attempt to drive a wedge between them. Let her just run off with the cousin again and never come back! Surely she should realize that Su Yu doesn't like her anymore and that he is indeed Wu Bi's.

This is frustrating. I want to have Friday and be able to continue watching 😅

↓ 4. Tokyo In April Is... (Ep 6)

For a short moment I really thought that Ren was lying unconscious or knocked out by some drug in Sanada's bed at the end. I got hot and cold for a moment. Fortunately he wasn't. My heart would not have survived that after the episode. So Ren has disappeared again and Kazuma sits alone in the cold and dark apartment, thinking about all the beautiful memories he had made with Ren during the past weeks.

The only thing missing was that he would have grabbed one of Ren's t-shirts and curled up on the bed sniffing it. Then I would have done the same with a box of tissues here. Not that I didn't know that would happen, but still, it hurts. And then to watch Ren break down while Kazuma was waiting for him at home... The series keeps on hurting really good!

↑ 5. Hidden Agenda (EP 3)

Okay, I admit it, I'm starting to get hooked on the series. I love Joke. And I love that he could go on dates with Zo without having to reveal himself. Slowly, though, he's realizing that he might have a chance after all and is really putting himself out there now. Sometimes I'm a very simple girl: give me nice music, a library, intense eye contact, and a pinky that finds the courage to make first contact and you'll find me melting on the floor, squealing blissfully.

The fact that Zo is also starting to realize that he should get to know another person first, and most importantly get to know yourself in order to know if you like a person, I think is so sweet. And the heart racing he definitely has... with Joke... This is a happy-go-lucky series right now.

↓ 6. Minato Shouji Coin Laundry Season 2 (Ep 3)

Minato and Shin now live together, but of course they don't share a room, which is a bit frustrating for Shin. Minato, however, is starting to come out of his shell a bit. So he asks Shin if they want to go to the festival together and let him dress him. And this boy is whipped!

On the beach, he takes Shin's hand, only to pull back in fright when other people come running to the beach. There are two generations that collide in Shin and Minato. Shin is proud of his love and wants to show that they both belong together. He is not afraid of the world because he has not experienced any negative experience because of his sexuality yet. He experiences the world from a not-so-conservative lens, especially since his parents have agreed to let him live with Minato until the apartment is renovated. Minato has grown up in a more conservative world and has always hidden away until now. He is slowly letting himself be carried away by Shin, but it takes time. Such a learned behavior, and especially mindset, can't be changed overnight. And I find the process very exciting right now. It's nice to watch the two of them take care of each other and grow together.

☼ 7. Jun & Jun (Ep 1)

Childhood friends who lost touch and now find their way back to each other paired with office romance? Bring it on! It was really hard for me to watch at the beginning. My threshold for embarrassment is very low and all the action until they arrived at the office caused me some pain. I hope from the next episode it will be a little more pleasant. The first impression is still positive. I'm curious to see how the story develops, why they lost track of each other and if it will end up being a feel-good story like Our Dating Sim. One can still hope. What I can say is that the visuals are definitely appealing.

↓ 8. Low Frequency (Ep 3)

So something happened. The acting wasn't as bad as it had been one episode before. We learned that ghosts can do things if Mon lets them, at least Thames. And they can touch each other now, which led to a very strange and totally out of context scene where they touch hands, illuminated by sunlight, and it almost comes to a kiss. So yes, the setting was nice, but the scene itself was a bit oddly placed. What else happened? Thames remembers something more to the accident and is jealous. There are a few who come up as potential suspects and other than that, very little else happened for an astonishing 40 minutes. Or I just forgot all about it already....

→ 9. Dinosaur Love (Ep 5)

What do they all think is so great about cotton-candy-ball? He's a snoozer who looks like his mind is on a trip abroad and no one knows when it's coming back. And Dino... I mean, there are really intense series with jealous and toxic characters, but he's really the crowning glory of them all. The worst thing is that he reminds me of one of my exes. I think he was jealous of my bedspread itself... And that's how Dino acts... It's no excuse for obsessively possessive behavior that you like the person. The way I screamed at my screen how much I hate this! And what are these scenes? I don't have to spend five minutes watching Dino play a mobile game and talk to his buddies while cotton-candy-ball sits next to him grinning stupidly. Never thought the biggest enemy in this series was the fact that Dino is the SOTUS president and SOTUS members aren't allowed to date freshmen or be friends with them! Will they still get together? I guess we'll see next week or sometime in August... It's getting tiring, but maybe I just wasn't in the right mood for it today. Maybe the title is that way because it's outdated stereotypes that act as the main roles here?

[sillyxaly]

Alright alright

Its late and I wont sleep before i tell this to someone so yall gotta listen

This post (idk how to make it pretty on mobile and im not finding out at midnight) suddenly made me realize why im sticking around in MHA.

Like I knew but I didnt know. I have probably skipped whole Arcs of that show, because I simply do not care about the kids who are the main cast. Dont come at me. I dont care. Aside from a few minor exceptions I care little to not at all about the kids. I used to activly dislike Izuku at the beginning and it just clicked in my brain why. Izuku, at the start, embodied that boundless hope that superhero society was perfect and like his whole life would suddenly be amazing if he got to be one of them. Which is pretty accuratly the picture that society painted. The superheores are amazing and they are something you aspire to be. Going into that show with Izuku as the protagonist id go so far as say they were flawless. Absolutly amazing. I didnt hate Izuku as much as I hated that.

I watch MHA for the villians. Shigaraki most precisely. I love that man with a burning passion that no hate comment could ever dream of tearing from my soul so if you read this dont even try. And I love him for the flaws. He is the flaw that hero society always had. Its what he always pointed out, what all of the league of Villians point at. This perfectly flawless system is just a light so bright it blinds you so you wont see the enermous shadow.

We spent so much time watching those young kids try to be part of that light and finally we are where I always wanted to be. We are exploring the darkness. I was thriving through they few "My Villian Academia" episodes and I have been ever since, not only because I feel my little broken band of misfits are gettinf more screentime, but also because the other characters have slowly started to aknowledge them as people. My personal point for it and also the point where my emotions towards Izuku drastically changed were all but one. It only took Izuku to see Tenko Shimura and aknowledge him as the scared and lost child he was and still is. Something along the lines of "I dont want to ignore that boy" was said in last weeks episode I believe. That sentiment has been in Izuku since the last season and it was literally the only thing I needed to go from "You're at most bearable to me" to "Thank you. I like you."

For so long these kids who grew up in this society and even the actual adult heroes as it seemed have painted this world in black and white. Were the good guys. They arent. And finally they too are actively questioning how true that really is, something I have been doing since first seing Tomura Shigaraki in action.

I actually like MHA now because it was dragging for me to get here, but now I am and I am in love with it. I am in such desperate need for these villians to be seen by the protagonists because nobody else ever tried to help them (im not counting All for One hes a manipulative shitty little guy and it was never genuine help to begin with) and they need help and I have an issue with fixing people and I want them to get help! And its just... freeing for me to have our pratogonists actovely start to realize that

[bykalopsia]

agito 11-20 notes

eps 11-14 were all cool as hell. no notes. the reveal that the brother was putting the pottery in the lake... Cinema. hover-bike... Awesome. the mystery around who killed mana's dad........ Intriguing. (my actual judgement waits for what actually happened) all around good set of eps.

this aki plot... shouichi is dumber than a box of rocks i simply have to accept it.

on one hand aki is cool for her involvement in the ever-so-slowly unraveling of the akatsuki incident and whatever other schemes she's involved in. on the other hand her "infiltration" into shouichi's life is so shoehorned it was literally so baffling. literally the second the professor comes back he goes "that's weird and suspicious as hell why did you just let this random lady into my house for three days" and shouichi goes "hmm. idk what you're talking about. also i'm gonna live at her house now." what are we doing!!!!!!!!!!!!!! her interactions with ryou are cool though and i don't dislike her character she's just introduced in such a clumsy way which is a shame

hojo is becoming a shining beacon of light for me bc i can simply always expect the same level of crazy bitch energy and he never fails me.

a lot of cool fight choreo in these episodes. despite unknown mechanics getting slightly more complex, i'm getting the feeling they're gonna keep being pretty much just motw-ish, which is ultimately fine. i like how they're adding human wrinkles to it though (ex. tsukasa deliberately trying to hide his murder through the unknown both to get away with it and to get ammo to destabilize the g3 unit)

on the other hand rapidly-aging-baby and his doctor(?)/assistant(?)/fellow strange creature(?) are so interesting i can't wait to properly get a feel of what their Deal is. [i wrote this before ep 20 where he refers to him as his apostle............ ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it's all still very cryptic. however i'm getting the sense that the envelope they found on shouichi when he washed ashore was for mr. apostle so i'm anticipating that connection to actually be made. or maybe i'm a fucking dumbass idk.]

shouichi as a protagonist is... i know i need to be patient and things will likely inevitably sort themselves out and he's likely on his own Denial Journey bc of his amnesia and like the little bits we see where he's actively conflicted about his past vs his present are compelling and i need to maintain the assumption of that inner world throughout his actions but at times it is really really really obvious that there's nothing but tumbleweeds up there. (ex. him not understanding saeko's escapism/ptsd) ultimately i think he lacks a grounded quality (which is simultaneously understandable bc of his amnesia but also it's a quality i desperately need to enjoy this subgenre of protagonist so.... it's a losing game and i'm a picky asshole and that's all there is to say on the matter)

i am enjoying hikawa and ryou though, but i'd probably still rank ozawa, hojo, and mana in my top 3 characters so far

also it's crazy as hell that hojo's task squad and hikawa shot the shit out of ryou and then..... didn't follow him? but ryou is always getting put through the wringer so idk what to expect lmao. i'm glad aki is getting their asses (even though i'm like 99 percent sure it's not gonna end up well for her... oh well)

[idle-flower]

Dear Yuletide Author - 2023

Thank you for your time and attention, and I hope your wishes are granted this holiday season!

Likes:

I prefer plot and angst and adventure to fluff, though a nice warm fluffy scene can make a good dessert at the end of the pain and suffering. I lean more to f/f and m/f than m/m. I enjoy forbidden relationships and the agony of trying to keep one's heart secret. I love exploring the 'what if' spinoffs of a small change in a canon. I swoon for lovers who take dramatic risks to protect their loved ones. I sometimes use my blorbos as chew toys.

I also enjoy detailed description of clothing/furniture/jewelry/pretty things in general. Not just heaping up brand names, but sensory detail. Tell me what I'm looking at!

Dislikes:

Please avoid sweeping tropey AUs like 'what if noir' or 'what if everyone was in high school'. No excited rambling about pregnancy or babies. (Older kids are okay.) While I am okay with pretty dark stuff, please don't gorily torture characters to death on screen. If people gotta die, limit the icky details! I am generally not keen on crossovers. I dislike PWP unless it is exceedingly hot smut (see below). Please don't do gender swaps or secret trans characters unless I specifically mention it as an option.

Smut:

I don't require it, but I do read a good bit of filthy porn.

Kinks I find interesting: mild bdsm, pain mixed with pleasure, dubcon, sibling or cousin incest, strap-ons (for f/f not for f/m), futanari and other magical appendages (also generally for f/f, unless we're in a setting where 'man turns out to have tentacles' actually makes sense), teasing, teenagers, drugs/magic with interesting effects, people making terrible decisions due to being emotionally overwrought or really really horny, trying to stay quiet and failing, desperate urgency, pushing people up against walls

PLEASE NO: rape or painful sex that one party is not enjoying at all, inserting anything edible (licking off boobs is okay), aggressive face-fucking, choking, degradation, scat/watersports, bukkake, parental incest, anyone younger than teen, anyone being called "baby girl", emphasis on 'virgin blood' (some writers make it a huge deal with tearing pain and fountains of blood, please don't).

NOTE FOR TREATS:

Absolutely fine with people getting inspired by my ideas and doing whatever! I don't know if we have to actively say this this year but yeah if you want to have a go, sure.

Poison Ivy (1992 film)

Sylvie Cooper, Ivy

I was struggling through the confusions of puberty, Ivy was hot, this film left an impression on me. In a way trying to build any sort of happy ending for Ivy feels out of place, but on the other hand there's a lot of loose ends left after the story.

Throughout the film, there's a lot the audience never knows about Ivy, including her legal name. Did Coop know it? (Maybe, probably.) Did her father? (Quite possibly not). How do they handle all the legal responsibilities of her death? Were Ivy's stories about the aunt she was staying with true? How do they break the news? How does her funeral go?

What do Sylvie and her father have to say to each other about Ivy after the truth comes out? Does he admit everything that he did? (The movie seems to let him off way too easily by implying things are all Ivy's fault, when he ABSOLUTELY knew how wrong his actions were) How does he handle the guilt? How do they rebuild their relationship? Or, speaking of guilt, Sylvie kind-of-sort-of was responsible for Ivy's death, even if it wasn't 100% intended and she was not quite in her right mind at the time. She did push Ivy. How does she handle THAT?

What is school like, afterwards? What rumors escape? How does Coop handle them? Does this attract new weird friends? Does she adopt any of Ivy's traits as her own?

Or - what if Ivy survives the fall? Seriously injured, possibly paralysed, but alive? How do they deal with her, once the truth comes out? Do they cover up her crimes? Do they keep her in their home? What happens to their relationships?

Did Ivy ever care about Sylvie? Did she legitimately want to be friends before she started trying to seize hold of the world and the wealth that Coop lived in?

Sylvie ends up kind of pushed out of a lot of the middle of the movie so the film can spend more time perving over Ivy. More about her character and her thoughts in general would be great. We know she can be a troublemaker and a fantasist - who else has she been telling lies to? Or is the whole movie itself a lie she's telling us? And if so, what is the story behind the story?

For AUs, what would have happened if Ivy had met Coop when they were several years younger, so she couldn't get her hooks into Darryl as easily? What if they met at summer camp and Ivy was just as messed-up and needy but the situations were different? What if the movie plot is actually a fantasy younger-Ivy spins about her future to her fascinated-and-appalled friend, who then has a chance to react to it? Or what if Ivy tried to replace Sylvie rather than her mother? Or what if it's Darryl that she wants to kill, as revenge against the men who've mistreated her in her life? Or if it's Sylvie she really wants to be with, and we get some twisted bad-girls scenario where BOTH parents are conveniently disposed of so the girls can live together forever, lying to each other and the world and refusing to acknowledge the truth of what they've done?

IF YOU WANT TO WRITE SMUT: I'm on board with Sylvie/Ivy sex, I don't want to have to see Ivy/Darryl in too much detail. Brief reference if necessary is okay but not a focus.

DNW: Sylvie to die, Ivy to end up with Darryl

Roseanne

Darlene Conner, David Healy, Molly Tilden

I got some lovely happy romance stories for my classic couple last year - this year I want to explore the possibilities of the love triangle.

Molly had the hots for David. David thought she was cute but was devoted to Darlene. Molly badly wanted Darlene's attention and friendship, which eventually turned into rivalry when Darlene constantly rejected her. Darlene felt threatened (but did check out Molly's chest, if just for comparison). That much is canon; it doesn't take a whole lot extra to give Molly a crush on Darlene as well and make the whole mess more complicated. Is Darlene's rejection of Molly's need for attention really so different from the way she treats David sometimes?

I generally prefer drama and angst and sticking to a fairly serious character exploration but with these three I'm also up for some Wacky and/or Sexy Shenanigans. Obviously it doesn't have to end with a happy poly trio, but I'd be tickled if it did (especially if it takes some serious work to get there. suffer first, then happiness!). Or you can whump people around a bit if it makes the angsty longing more intense. Bittersweet is fine.

Some idea seeds:

Playing With Matches, Molly kisses Darlene rather than David, Darlene panics because she doesn't want to be either a lesbian or a homophobe, David panics because he thinks this means Darlene will never really want him, Jackie overhears the wrong things and panics more, chaos ensues.

Molly runs away from home and strikes a deal to hide out in Darlene's college apartment because no one would think to look for her there. David finds out.

Molly hooks up with David after Darlene dumps him for Jimmy, everyone's bitter and angsting about what they don't have.

David and Darlene are happily married stable adults living in Chicago and publishing a comic together. They are reunited with Molly at a comics convention and she confesses that when they were teenagers she was into both of them.

All three live together and raise kids, the perils of poly parenting. Especially if the rest of the extended Conner clan keeps sticking their noses in to complain about this weird situation.

Gen ideas: the three of them at a thrift store comparing their various fashion tastes as they pick through old clothes, working on a school project and battling over its direction and political messaging, or maybe the three of them doing roleplaying together (either tabletop or LARP, the 90s is peak White Wolf era after all, imagine them in a vampire game)

IF YOU WANT TO WRITE SMUT: Any combination of the three, teens or adults, is fine! No extra characters in bed though please. I have a weakness for outwardly soft and submissive boys who are much more dominant in bed, particularly if he's teased to the breaking point before pouncing and going absolutely wild (to everyone's enjoyment).

DNW: Anything from the revival/TheConners continuity. Please try not to have characters commenting on David being "emasculated" or Darlene only liking him because he's "practically a girl", the gender policing really bothers me. Don't make Jimmy actually appear because I don't want to have to think too much about that actor. Please don't make David gay even if Darlene leaves him for Molly. Don't make anyone 100% Evil.

Kushiel's Legacy

Phedre's Younger Sibling

Ever since someone mentioned it I've been intrigued by the idea of what happened to Phedre's little sister or brother, the one her mother was pregnant with when Phedre was sold to the Night Court. We know her parents probably died during the Bitterest Winter, of fever or of war, because they never tried to meet with Phedre once she was famous. But her sibling might never have even known Phedre's name or that she even existed, so they might have lived past that point without ever having a reason to contact her. What sort of life did that second child, four years younger than Phedre, have?

Phedre's coloring and defiant nature might read quite differently on a beautiful young man, a clever one with a knack for getting into trouble. Did he grow up bouncing along on slightly more successful caravans, learning scraps of Skaldi and Caerdicci as they traveled? Did he develop the business sense his father lacked? Did he beg caravan guards to teach him swordplay? Did a young love of travel combined with his parents tendency to bad fortune lead to him signing on as a sailor while he was still basically a child?

A boy might also be less likely to hear even a whisper of rumor of the lost older daughter. A boy might have been embraced as Firstborn and Heir by his father and never doubt.

A second daughter, however, one with a passing resemblance to Phedre but without Kushiel's dart and its mixed blessings, her existence might be more complicated. Looking at her might be a constant reminder of the shame of what happened with their first daughter. She might qualify for the canon of one of the Houses, but her parents might have felt themselves unable to return to the city of Elua to trade her, for fear of incurring the wrath of Cereus House. Might they have sold her somewhere else, even on the open market as a slave, as Phedre feared her fate might have been if her parents had been desperate enough? Or perhaps she was less pretty, less useful, and found herself abandoned at a temple of Naamah or Elua by her family? (We meet a Liliane at the temple where Imriel grew up and Phedre notes that was her mother's name. She seems a little bit young to be Phedre's sister but it's not impossible, and there's certainly a story in what happened to her if she is.)

But if a sister grew up looking a great deal like Phedre but without that divine spark, might she have been seized by someone precisely because of that resemblance? Someone who longed for the heroine but could not afford or entice the Comtesse de Montreve, so instead acquired their own little discount version? Or someone with a grudge against Phedre that they dared not act on, so kept a girl to punish in her place, never knowing it was actually her sister?

Or perhaps Phedre's wayward parents settled down a bit and matured and lived a respectable middle-class life outside the City of Elua, and this younger sister or brother lived a very ordinary d'Angeline life, until the Bitterest Winter. If they were sixteen and suddenly orphaned by fever, what did they do then? Take up arms to fight the Skaldi invasion? Go in search of more distant relatives? Philippe Cantrel had at least a father and two older brothers - we can assume Grandfather died and the inheriting elder brothers didn't remember Phedre's name or weren't paying enough attention to know she existed. But the child might have returned to the city seeking these uncles out of desperation. Or they might have been killed or enslaved by the Skaldi. Or all sorts of things.

I guess what I'm looking for here is a viewpoint on events within Terre d'Ange from a character who isn't important, isn't divinely touched, doesn't know exactly what all the great houses are up to, and never has any idea how closely connected they are to great events. Some dramatic irony and angst welcome. Possibly they live a short, unremarkable life and die alone. Possibly they make something of themselves, but without ever becoming rich and famous and royally connected. Whoever they are, Phedre never knows.

IMPORTANT NOTE: I have not yet read Cassiel's Servant! I may or may not have gotten to it by Christmas, and I was not taking anything in that book into account when making this request, this is a repeat from years before. I have no idea if any further light is shone on the subject, and I will likely not recognise any character from that book. If you haven't read it either, great! If you have, don't lean on it.

IF YOU WANT TO WRITE SMUT: go for it, just see my general smut-DNWs at the top.

DNW: Accidental incest between Phedre and her sibling. The sibling turning out to be a secret behind-the-scenes savior who was responsible for some major event in the plot. Either sibling ever figuring out that they're related.

Picnic at Hanging Rock

Hester Appleyard, Sara Waybourne

Note: I have not read the book or seen the 1975 movie, I've only seen the miniseries. You can draw ideas from other versions if you want but you'll have to explain what you're talking about or I may not get the reference.

First off, TV Sara is the cutest thing and I want to protect her (and, well, THAT obviously didn't work out). Second, I feel like the relationship between Hester and Sara is interestingly ambiguous (what isn't, in this show?). Hester seems both antagonistic and friendly to Sara in different ways, and it seems clearly suggested that she's reminded of her own orphan past. She sometimes wants to bond with her and othertimes wants to furiously reject her. She fears that Sara knows far too much, and she's tempted to tell her more.

The circumstances of Sara's death are very unclear, though we see that Hester knows something and is covering it up. What happened between them on that final night? Did Hester push Sara out in a rage? Did they struggle, up in the tower on a windy night, and a careless shove let Sara fall? Did Hester try to save her? Did Sara leap from the tower in despair? Did Sara try to climb out to escape and fall? How did Hester find out that Sara was dead, and why did she choose to deal with it in the way she did (pretending Sara had left but not disposing of the body)? What was she thinking? Or did she truly convince herself Sara had just 'disappeared' like the other girls?

So things that I'd be particularly interested in, storywise:

A depiction of the details and the drama of that final, fatal night

Any scene in which they really open up to each other and share secrets we didn't see in the series (which might or might not end with Hester threatening Sara to shut her up)

AU in which Hester adopts Sara herself and trains her to follow in her footsteps? Possibly where she uses Sara as a bridge to marry Mr Cosgrove? (Dark and mysterious things should still happen, just DIFFERENT ones)

AU in which it's Hester who falls to her death after their last confrontation in the tower. Sara lives! But she might be suspected of murder, especially if for some reason Hester named her in the will and left her the school. What happens to the school and Sara now?

Angst and drama are likely. Killing either or both characters is fine. Depictions of self-harm and child abuse consistent with the series are fine, but tag it. No sexual abuse depictions please.

Smutwise: Not with each other! In keeping with the style of the show, some light sexual scenes might work well for filling in character info (what IS hester's sexuality anyway? If Sara Lives, how does she eventually move on from Miranda?) but this is not a kink request.

DNW: Hester/Sara slash. A super-happy fix-it fic. This is a dark canon, so I'm okay with the threat of someone being pruriently interested in Sara or young Hester, but I absolutely don't want anyone to do anything sexual to Sara while she's underage. It's okay to imply that young Hester might have been molested or prostituted but I don't want to see it happen in detail.

21 Jump Street - Series

Harry Ioki

I always felt like Harry was shortchanged on the show in terms of how much screentime and attention he got. Maybe just because I thought he was gorgeous and wanted so much more. Because they showed less of him, I have fewer strong hooks to build off of for requests. I don’t really know what I want, other than an Ioki adventure during the first four seasons of the show. Some mystery, some drama, a chance for him to look cool, an excuse to dress him up nice? (Can you find an excuse to make him solve a mystery while wearing a snazzy dinner jacket, or some sort of lovingly-detailed punk getup?)

Romance-wise, I don’t want him in a full relationship with any of the main cast but I wouldn’t mind him flirting with ANY of them. I’m cool with writing an OFC for him to romance during the story, but I would prefer a reset button on that for the ending. Maybe she dies, maybe she’s the bad guy and he has to arrest her, maybe she doesn’t like it when she finds out who he really is, maybe it was just a fling, whatever. A nice poignant note to wrap up on. Given the time period and his personality, I feel like if Harry were bi, he'd be keeping it quiet, and I don't want a story that's all about the struggles of being closeted in the 80s, so if you really want to give him a boyfriend, that shouldn't be the main focus. Romance isn’t necessary either, but it’s nice to have someone to admire the boy. Even if it’s just Tom and Doug complaining that he looks better in that outfit than they would. (Background Tom/Doug bromance is fine too.)

Angst and bittersweet endings are very acceptable and common for the canon. I'd prefer at least a tiny spark of hope (for him personally even if not for the characters of the week) rather than total despair.

Please do not reference anything having to do with the movies, not even as a joke.

I'd actually prefer to skip the smut on this one and keep it in tone with what you'd see on television.

DNW: Harry sleeping with anyone in the main cast. Any main character dying. Gross-out jokes or otherwise not taking the premise of the show seriously. AIDS storylines. Any reference to the movies.

[thepictureofsdr]

i saw your post about alastair and now im curious about all ut thoughts on Matthew

this ask. is like half a year old. I am So Sorry however i have thought about it literally every day bc my feelings on him are so… complex

i think i can break it down into two categories: 1. his character in context of the whole series, and 2. the bubble of his character, not taking into account his actions and impact towards other people

1. um. he makes me SO MAD. listen i have said time and time again that the thieves dont owe alastair forgiveness but that doesn’t extend to matthew actively trying to fuck up alastairs life. what pisses me off is that this whole agenda is centered on matthews wants, its not because he cares about his friends and wants them away from someone he thinks is bad. when he tells thomas about alastair at the party, there’s no concern for thomas. hes told at their best friends party, probably the first night of happiness since his sister was killed, while intoxicated and very much in public. math didnt take thomas aside or wait for a better moment. [I DONT HATE MATH I JUST LOVE THOMAS] matthew doesnt like alastair, so no one can like alastair, even if he has to hurt others to obtain that. hes very clearly stringing the other thieves along in this its just for him, they all like alastair or dont care about the past. kit doesnt give a shit, james respects alastair to a degree and thomas is head over heels. he even manages to make cordelia call his manipulation of alastair “kind.” he condemns alastair for spreading rumours yet he himself has deemed spreading gossip fun [i can’t STAND hypocrisy its a very easy way to get me to dislike a character unfortunately] he unconsciously blames alastair for the death of his sibling and now alastair and thomas are paying for it. understanding where a mental dip and lashing out are coming from can happen at the same time as not agreeing with it. i understand why matthew acts like this but that doesnt mean i can just ignore how matthew pushed alastair back down to his lowest yknow?

2. i adore him, and i sympathize with him, and he makes my heart hurt in every possible way. he was my tied fave character in tales, this young energetic boy who wants to be friends w the quiet kid, who stood up for his friends, and my heart SHATTERED when i read the poison story. at his core hes a genuinely good person, so i can’t even imagine the guilt thats been crushing him all these years. not only the pain of hurting his mother but killing the baby, my heart breaks every time i think about him and what he’s been carrying all these years. it hurts to even think about this burden hes placed on himself, the silence and ever growing self hatred and inherent belief that hes a problem. all i want is for him to receive that forgiveness hes been desperately needing for so long, and for him to see himself through the eyes of others, for him to see that goodness he possesses and the light he brings into the lives of others and for him to be loved as he so deserves.

there’s more but i cant lie im really scared of matthew lovers but also id feel so bad leaving this in drafts 😭 all in all my feelings on him are so complicated, i love him but hes also hurt someone else i love, hes a walking grey area. but i dont hate him, i feel like a lot of people are quick to assume any criticism is pure unfiltered hatred which clearly isn’t true considering my fave is ALASTAIR talk about someone who’s actions can be criticized 😭

[aminiatureworld]

An Unexpected Rival

Characters: Childe, Scaramouche, Xiao, gn!reader

Word Count: 3,556

Warnings: Swearing

Premise: When thinking about fighting for the affections of someone, one normally imagines great declarations of love and promises of loyalty. But sometimes that’s not it. Sometimes it’s simply living with a being that hates you more than anything.

In which the reader’s pet hates their s/o

Author’s Note: I did give the pets names because I felt I couldn’t really refer to them as “your pet” the whole time. I also am not a pet owner. Still I hope you enjoy! 

Going to try non bullet pointed for a bit. We’ll see how it goes!

Childe

Honestly you didn’t know what to do.

Here you were, standing in the middle of the living room of your apartment, trying desperately not to laugh at the sight of your dog sitting directly on the chest of your much beleaguered partner.

You hadn’t really considered the consequences of introducing Childe to Lacey. I mean, how badly could the interactions be between the man you were convinced was your soulmate and the nicest golden retriever that had ever existed? If there was going to be issues you’d reasoned it would be on Childe’s side. So when your partner lit up at the mention of your fluffy child, you’d assumed all would be well.

Evidently that was not the case. You knew that Lacey could be clingy on occasion, but she’d really been making an effort these past few weeks. Knocking your partner out of the way when you two walked through the door together, refusing to stop walking when you two met up at a park or on the street, refusing to answer to Childe’s attempts at affection. It was almost impressive, the lengths Lacey was willing to go to establish her position as Number One Childe Hater – especially impressive considered the well-attested competition, including but not limited to a Fatui Harbinger.

Now you sprung into action as best you could, bottling up the giggles that threatened to erupt at any moment.

“Childe!” You exclaimed, walking closer. Lacey still refused to stand up, but her tail thumped excitedly against the floor, and she let out a short whine of appreciation. Unfazed by this cry for praise you sighed. “Lacey! Get up! Honestly, you’re not being a very good testament to your intelligence right now.”

Nudging her slightly you sighed with relief as the golden retriever sprang up, attacking your hands and face with kisses as you dragged Childe up to a sitting position. Childe at least seemed unfazed by the sudden attack, letting out a mere “oof”, and smiling a slightly embarrassed smile.

“I’m really sorry about this Childe.” You said, hands still batting away Lacey’s frantic activity as she attempted to get you to focus on her.

“It’s alright. Just, wow she’s a heavier girl than I expected.”

“Hopefully no squished organs?”

“Archons no! It’ll take more than this girl to fell me, don’t you worry.” Childe attempted to give Lacey a pet, but the dog that had just before been laying all over him now scampered out of the way, instead pawing at your back.

“Lacey! Stop being so rude! Urgh, and here I was hoping that you two would be somewhat settled before I went on my trip.”

You sighed, letting your head drop into the palms of your hand, not wanting to think about what might happen during the week and a half that Childe would be required to take care of Lacey. Would she even let him in the apartment to feed her? What about walks and the like? Were you going to come home to all our warfare? Childe seemed to understand your quickly dropping mood, placing a hand on your shoulder and rubbing small circles with his thumb, even as Lacey whined and began pawing at his arm.

“I promise it’ll be alright my dear. We’ll manage while you’re gone and who knows? Maybe by the time you get back we’ll be thick as thieves, and then you’ll be the one getting sat on.”

“Who knows.” You let out a burst of laughter. But even as you two shared this moment of levity your mind continued to spin its threads, dreading the days to come and what you’d be presented with the day you got back.

 “Alright, what’re we going to do.”

Childe stood in the foyer, hands on his hip, irritation in his heart. Lacey seemed to be mimicking the gesture, chest puffed out proudly as she stared the Harbinger down. They must’ve been standing like that for at least ten minutes, Childe thought to himself, ten minutes of staring and nothing yet done. It was beginning to grate on him, and were it not for the fact that you’d have to pay for damages, he was quite tempted to vault over the nearby furniture, if only so he could get to the kitchen and have this miserable showdown be over.

He didn’t dislike Lacey, no Childe didn’t think he could truly dislike any dog if he tried. He used to dream of owning a wolf pup, of flopping around in the snow with his companion, running as fast as he could and still being chased down with a crash, before being bombarded by affectionate pawing and kisses. These memories seemed quite silly when faced with the reality of caring for a dog however, and now he wanted only to bang his head against the wall, and maybe pass out from the exertion.

“I get that you love your owner.” He spoke again, how long had he been talking to this dog? “But I don’t think this is the way to win their heart.”

Lacey said nothing, simply narrowing her eyes and letting out a slightly hiss. Still Childe continued on.

“And like it or not you are going to have to eat eventually. So I suggest if you’re going to misbehave, that you should at least do it on a day when I’m not your primary caretaker.”

When there was still no movement from Lacey Childe sighed. That evening when he returned to his own apartment it was with the unfortunate knowledge that golden retriever bites hurt a lot more than he’d expected them too.

 It was storming, and the city of Liyue had transformed from a glistening city to one of mud and rusted iron. Childe swore under his breath as he pulled his coat closer around him, desperately trying to keep as dry as possible. Who knew if he’d be able to make it to your bedroom and grab one of his spare shirts with Lacey acting like he was a burglar instead of well known acquaintance? The song and dance between the two of them was grating. Feeding your golden retriever being nearly impossible, not to mention the times when Childe half dragged Lacey through the most half assed of walks. Really how could such a gentle spirit turn so stubborn so quickly? Childe didn’t know, all he knew was that the sooner you came home the sooner he could stop worry about being nipped at the heels.

The sight that met Childe at the entrance to your apartment was jarring. Instead of the usual irritated dog Childe was met with utter silence, and a stillness that betrayed the fact that not only was Lacey not in the hall, but she was also avoiding the kitchen and the living room.

“Lacey?” Childe called out, getting no answer but the whipping of wind and the rumble of thunder. “I swear if you managed to run off – Lacey!”

Going further down the hall Childe finally heard the sound of muffled whimpering. Walking into your bedroom he spied Lacey under the bed, eyes filled not with disdain, but with anxiety.

“Lacey, why in Teyvat are you here?”

There was no reply, until suddenly another clap of thunder shook the walls. Lacey let out a yelp and crawled under the bed a little more, flattening her head against the floor, although there was not much room left in that department. Childe stared at this for a second letting the pieces fall into place. He just couldn’t believe it, couldn’t believe that this was the same Lacey who so fearlessly guarded the apartment against his entrance every day.

This slight smugness was extinguished rather quickly though, instead replaced with a sense of pity, and the need to make this poor girl feel the least bit better.

“Hey, hey it’ll be alright.” Childe spoke softly. For a moment he left the room, but quickly he returned, towels and blankets in hand, praying that you wouldn’t mind that he messed up your closet a little bit.

“Let’s make a fort, shall we?”

Not waiting for any sort of acknowledgment Childe began to pile up the covers on your bed, making sure to lay down towels in case you were worried of shedding. At first Lacey did nothing much than scooch out enough to watch him, but within the next flash of lightning she was up and moving, diving under the makeshift fort and clambering around Childe, as if trying to find out if she could burrow through the Harbinger.

“I know, I know, it’s pretty scary out there, huh?” Childe ruffled Lacey’s head slightly. “But you’ll see, it’ll pass soon enough. And then we can go back to fighting, alright.”

Lacey let out a whine, but nevertheless began to settle down, lying down and once more resting her head on her paws.

“There’s a good girl.” Childe smiled softly. “You aren’t that bad you know. At least you aren’t that bad when you’re not trying to bite my leg off.”

Your surprise at the improvement in Childe-Lacey relations was somewhat immense when you returned. Though Childe refused to say what had managed to form such a bond between your disgruntled pet and him, only that he hoped you didn’t mind dog hair on your bed. Lacey, for her part, no longer tried to sit on your partner.

Even if she still pushed him out of the way when you came home.

 Scaramouche

Scaramouche could deal with a lot of things. He could deal with the fact that your parrot wouldn’t let the man within three feet of the parrot’s cage without attempting to bite his hands off. He could deal with the obnoxiously loud clicking whenever he got too close to you, and he could deal with fact that your parrot was fond of yelling random phrases at him in the most aggressive tone Scaramouche had ever heard. Scaramouche could deal with all of that. What he couldn’t deal with is what your parrot insisted on calling him, no matter how much time was spent saying: “Scaramouche. I am Scaramouche!”

“Electro boy? Really?”

“I’m sorry Scara,” you let out a giggle, “I didn’t know what your name was when I first saw you.”

Oh Scaramouche was sure of that, but did that really mean that Oliver had to call him solely by that title? It didn’t help that you must’ve referred to Scaramouche an awful lot as “Electro Boy” for it to be the name that stuck in Oliver’s mind. And regardless of how many times you used the title, it was one thing for you to use the nickname. It was quite another thing for Oliver to, since, unlike in your case, Oliver’s use of “Electro Boy” could be nothing but derogatory.

Scaramouche had long given up in wooing the errant parrot over. If they were to be mortal enemies, so be it. He’d dealt with that before.

“Oh Scaramouche, you must be joking!” You’d exclaimed when he’d revealed this train of thought, cupping his face in your hand and pressing affectionate kisses to his face. He’d let you do so, let you imagine that one day there might be a reconciliation. But in his heart he knew. Unless Oliver learned to stop with the name calling, Scaramouche would never forgive him for the insult.

“I wish you would write.” You whispered.

Pain skirted through Scaramouche’s face, but still he refused the promise that you needed. You knew that Scaramouche would never be able to have a normal relationship with you, that these trips were necessary, were a part of him that you’d never be able to wrench away. Still, the least he could do was promise to write. Without his writings, well how could you even be sure he was alive?

“I’m sorry.” Scaramouche whispered. Leaning in so your foreheads were touching he let out a sigh, warming your lips with his breath. “I cannot promise I will write. I wouldn’t like to break a promise to you.”

“I know.” You whispered back, shaking your head as much as you could. “Still, I’d almost rather a broken promise.”

“You wouldn’t. I know it would drive you mad.”

“Perhaps, but better than nothing?”

You two stood there, basking in silence. A familiar cry broke the reverie.

“Electro Boy! Electro Boy!” A series of clicks accompanied the sudden shriek. There was no better way to break the spell. Almost immediately Scaramouche pulled away. Walking towards the door he paused, turning around one more time.

“I’ll miss you.”

Those words washed over you, their owner having been carried away with the wind.

 Scaramouche hurried up the steps, anticipation keep his pace quick and his thoughts a jumble of fragments. The long mission he’d been sent on was finally over, and now he could think not of noisy soldiers, nor of the people who continually disappointed him, but of you. He couldn’t wait, every step on the staircase felt like an obstacle, something he must triumph against to reach you. Finally arriving at your door he barely paused, stepping this way and that as he opened the door before striding into the hallway as fast as he could.

“I’m home.” He called into the afternoon light. Almost immediately two things happened. One was that you leapt off your position on the couch, practically barreling yourself into his arms. The second was that Oliver began to screech, hopping from one foot to the other in an indecipherable dance.

“Scara, you’re home!” You cried, exclamation by the way you buried your face into his shoulder.

“Scara! Scara! Scaramouche!” Oliver echoed. The words made Scaramouche freeze up, taken aback as he was by their usage.

“What was that Oliver?” He called out, not altogether sure if the parrot would even reply to him. Scaramouche had really only referred to Oliver by name the first time he met him. After that you had to settle with “the bird” or “the noisemaker”. This time, however Scaramouche couldn’t help but use it. This was, after all, a matter of great importance.

“Scaramouche, Scaramouche, who’s a pretty bird?” Oliver tittered irreverently.

His tone was still somewhat sharp, Scaramouche never heard Oliver snap at you the way he did him, but nevertheless the words had struck a chord. Finding himself at a loss for words Scaramouche stared at you, trying to figure out what was going on.

“That’s probably my fault,” you laughed hesitantly, “I guess I was talking about you more than I thought. It’s only that, well I missed you an awful lot. And Oliver is my confidante, he always has been. So I guess I’ve just been talking a lot to him about you. I’ve really missed you…”

Scaramouche felt his heart soften. Leaning over he pressed a kiss to your forehead, much to the indignation of Oliver, who twittered away as normal. Still, it was better than it had been before. And, if Scaramouche could admit it to himself, he didn’t mind the idea of you pouring out to Oliver how much you missed him. It made him feel important, feel whole. And if your rude bird had helped at all, then Scaramouche could find it in him to respect Oliver, though only a little.

“I’m glad you thought of me.” He whispered to you. “And I’m glad you still had a confidante to talk to.”

And if the result was a parrot who no longer called him “Electro Boy”, then all the better.

 Xiao

Honestly Xiao couldn’t really see the appeal of pets. Something that was only cemented when he met your cat.

“And this is Honey.” You’d said softly, picking up the orange feline and cradling her in your arms. The cat made no sounds, instead it stared straight at Xiao, eyes narrow, gaze untrusting. Xiao was equally out of depths in this matter. What was he supposed to do? Pet it, presumably. Reaching out with hesitant fingers Xiao almost immediately pulled away, dodging an onslaught of clawing.

Ever since then there seemed to have been an odd hierarchy established, at least in Honey’s mind. She never let Xiao sit next to you, oh no, that would’ve been too generous. Instead Honey squeezed into the space between you two, no matter how small and wow was it small sometimes, meowing angrily as Xiao passed his arm over her head to hold your hand. Sometimes she’d try the tactic of walking all over you, lying on your lap, wrapping herself around your shoulders, and all the time glaring at Xiao as if he’d brought some sort of catastrophe on her for daring to try and get close to you.

“Your cat hates me.”

“She does not!” You exclaimed. “Honey doesn’t hate anyone! She just needs to get used to you.”

“She hates me. She thinks I’m beneath her.”

Xiao glared up at Honey, who was looming over the conversation via the bookshelf in your bedroom. Honey’s eyes narrowed and for a moment Xiao felt as if he’d somehow spilled the cat’s secrets. It wasn’t his fault that he knew what she was thinking. After all, hadn’t Xiao been like that for a time? An ornery soul who found most interactions beneath him? Who knew he’d be on the receiving end of that relationship someday. He certainly didn’t appreciate it now.

“You just need to get used to one another.” You continued to assure Xiao. “Honey’s a little bit possessive. It’s nothing personal. She’ll get over it.”

Well it’d been four weeks since that conversation and unfortunately Honey showed exactly zero signs of “getting over it”. Though perhaps she wasn’t clawing at him anymore, maybe because you’d actually scolded her for it, the gaze never left her eyes. The fact that she meowed loudly whenever Xiao made more contact than hand holding also didn’t help her case.

 Xiao sighed, staring at the sky as the sun began its descent beyond the peaks of Liyue. A cluster of trees ringed the back part of your house – trees apparently planted by your grandparents – and Xiao enjoyed perching in them to watch the sunset.

“At least here the cat will leave me alone.” He muttered.

It’d been a tiring day. Honey had been in a particularly bad mood – probably the result of Xiao staying the night – and the atmosphere in the house had become somehow so tense that Xiao figured taking a hike wouldn��t be a bad idea. Even if he found the whole exercise a bit demeaning.

“I’m losing to a cat.” Xiao called flatly out into the air. There was no reply of course, but he didn’t mind that. Imagine what his fellow adepti would think of him now, flailing around, trying to win the affections of a furball whose favorite pastime was being as irritating as possible.

Now Xiao heard a familiar yowl. Glancing down he spied Honey, hair standing on end, gripping a branch as if her life belonged to it. An old conversation rose to the front of his mind. Something about cats being able to go up trees very easily, but not so much down. What an idiotic creature, he thought to himself.

Still it’d be ill form to leave the poor idiot clutching onto the branch, so fighting his smugness as beset he could Xiao leaned over and attempted to wrench the cat from the branches. Honey let out a series of shrieks, claws digging into the bark, but eventually she relinquished and Xiao pulled her up onto his lap. Almost immediately she began pawing at his chest, meowing her indignancy.

“I know.” Xiao glared at the cat. “But they wouldn’t be very happy if you got stuck.”

As if to reply Honey narrowed her eyes, turning around to look at the skyline, rather than acknowledge the adeptus she was now laying on. Xiao hummed in response.

“You know things would be easier if you weren’t so aggressive.”

A meow in response.

“I don’t understand you. I don’t understand why you’re so territorial.”

Another meow.

“I suppose I’m like that. I also want them to myself. Things would be easier without you clawing at me. But they love you, and that’s what matters. I don’t know why but they do.”

Silence, perhaps Honey was insulted by the way Xiao spoke.

“I can’t say I’ll love you. But I’ll try to like you. As long as you try to like me.”

Silence again, but this time Xiao took it as an assent. Letting out a sigh he turned back towards the horizon, gaze drifting towards the peaks that Honey too was watching with interest. The night was alive with the soft chirps of insects, and a faint breeze ruffled Xiao hair, dancing through Honey’s fur. Xiao let out a sigh and, nemesis on his stomach, allowed himself a little rest.

You stared at the mismatched pair, a smile playing on your lips. How funny they looked, curled up together. Like two cats, one a panther, the other a tabby. And yet somehow the tabby was running the shots.

They look so peaceful, you mused to yourself, who knows what they might be like in the morning.

At the very least, you’d be sure to enquire about the nature of your partner’s conversation with your cat, something which had seemed very important to him.

[steelycunt]

"do you defend him or is it more of an acceptance of how terrible he is"

s girl anon here to explain this!!

In my experience, it is an odd combination of both. I’m going to get really controversial rn but I don't think he's that terrible. in fact, I would go as far as to say he's redeemable and compelling and an overall good person who makes questionable decisions from time to time. hear me out!! I don't necessarily defend him as much as I explain his actions. exhibit A: the prank. I don't defend what he did but I do try to find angles that help me understand his thought process because I don't think he was purposely being malicious as much as just reckless, impulsive, misguided, and led by anger while also trying to be protective of people he cared about - which I don't think is as controversial of a take. that being said, I am simultaneously an s apologist sooo.

I'm about to go on a bit of tangent, so i'm sorry. these are my more self-centered reasons. I see a lot of myself in him and looking at him exposes flaws within myself. but at the same time it allows me to give myself some degree of grace. because, despite, or maybe because of, all of his flaws I love him and think he's a good person. his desperate desire to be good and a better version of himself is just so very compelling to me (and relatable. we all have aspects of ourselves that unintentionally harm others and we have to try to better ourselves while still staying true to who we are). you've said this before but being better is something that he has to actively and consciously try to do. I think I sometimes think that certain things should be effortless and easy and instinctual, but I also don't think that's actually true. sometimes the fact that you are putting in effort is just as meaningful. we are shown things like love at first sight and "found soulmates" and other things that are "predetermined", but in order for love to really flourish you have to choose to make an effort, which is very scary to me. and to him too, I think. but he tries and he's not always good at it. but he always has caring and gentle qualities that line his actions when dealing w people he loves. I struggle w being selfless so so much and it's something I really dislike about myself because it can occasionally hurt people I deeply care about. so whenever I catch myself trying to change that it makes me feel better because it indicates some sort of growth even though it doesn't come naturally to me, and he reminds me of those attempts at growth.

also, sirius' tendency to unintentionally hurt people he's close to by being careless and then regretting it immediately afterwards... it's like looking in a mirror. he wants to be separated from his family and hold no similarities to them but he also struggle's with having shared characteristics that he sometimes doesn't even realize are there until he fucks up massively. and when he does he tries to get them out of his system but struggles. that desperation to prove himself after wake-up calls is just soooo real. I understand his regret and desire to be forgiven. frustration when that takes time and it seems as though his efforts are useless. that occasionally shifting into anger but then settling back into sorrow and deep-rooted regret while also having hints of self-pity. like I just am so obsessed with him. I understand him so much that it just makes me want to give him a hug even when he's fucked up. and I know that is not something you can relate to but when he's (rightfully) being shit on by other characters for his actions I just picture myself hugging him and telling him I know he can do better yknow? like, I just want to encourage him to keep trying.

I don't know if i'm making sense and I will probably come up w more reasons why I love him later, but I think for now this will do.

sometimes I look back at things i've done and ask myself "would sirius have done this" and usually when the answer is yes it correlates to it being something that got me into a lot of trouble. but oh well <3

anyway, I love this discourse ridi. I love hearing you talk about these two, you get them and your blog is one of my fav things ever. it makes me v happy and I will try to keep sending you snoopy/muppet-related things I see <333

hi!! im going to respond under the cut just because i sense i will have a rather rambling answer!!

first of all--for the record & For the Public (rather than in response to anything you've said specifically, anon) i want to clarify that i actually love s as a character. the cartoonish sort of dislike i pretend to harbour towards him on here is just an exaggerated little joke. i think he (and when i talk about him i'm referring more to the fan development of his character than the rather basic canon foundations) is a super complex and compelling character, but he's also posh and handsome and it makes me giggle to hate on him for that. i wouldn't write s as much as i do if i actually disliked his character, nor would i read him.

having established that!! i completely agree with everything you say here. obviously discussing certain bits of him (e.g. his relationship with r) we're inevitably going to veer away from objective canon and into subjective hc territory but...i dont think he's that terrible, to start. i think he's a bit reckless and jealous and has a rather volatile, dangerous temper that can make him capable of cruelty at times. ive spoken about this a lot before under my #s tag so i wont go into it too much here, but have exactly the same view of the prank as you do in as much as it was a poorly thought-out, impulsive act of anger rather than proof that he's an intentionally malicious person.

i think (and maybe this gets lost amongst my jokes) that he is a fundamentally good person. and as you said i think its all about the fact that he is trying and he continues to try, even if there are setbacks here and there. i absolutely adore writing him and specifically i adore writing him when he is trying, i love writing him when he's being sweet and gentle with r (and that isnt just because i think r deserves that sort of treatment as you say teehee <3) and i hope but dont necessarily assume that comes across in my writing/my answers to asks such as these, and that it seems like i handle his character with care and detail!! because i do try to!! i think the sort of hc-developed version of him that we're talking about here (because i think from the way you talk about him we characterise him very similarly) is a very real character and its not that aspect of him--which i can completely understand resonating with people--that i love to hate as much as it is the poshness and the prettiness. i think for his ego's sake that since he is the coolest guy in the room there should be at least one person (me) there to boo and humble him xx

anyway!! that's all really. s is so so fun for me to talk about and write about so thank you so much for your insight!! and for being so sweet!! i hope what i've said here sort of makes sense!! i love snoopy + muppet related things and i love YOU!! mwah!!

[kass-storycorner]

Oh god, okay hear me out. I suffer from insomnia and I couldn’t get Childes letter out of my head (btw the English version is so much less “I am in love with you” than the German one. He literally says in the German version that he misses us and wants us to visit him, like straight up this is a love letter!! The English version is really toned down in comparison).

So. I know his birthday is over, at least where I’m from. But. I wrote this whole ass fan fic, that is way too long, because I was so inspired by that letter. I’m not really satisfied with the ending, I honestly wanted to add so much more fluff but… I also didn’t want to make this too long, I actually planned for it to be short??? help (also it’s 4am now noooo)

Happy birthday, Tartaglia

Genre: a little bit angsty, fluff, comfort

Rating: SFW, though mentions of kissing and sharing a bed

Content warnings: mention of a family death, Bennett’s bad luck lol but both are unrelated haha

Characters: Tartaglia x gn!reader, a guest appearance of Bennett, mention of Zhongli

Word count: 2,796 words (oooh f*ck haha)

-

You’ve been busy the whole day doing some commissions for the Adventures Guild and were now on your way to Mondstadt, when you heard a familiar voice call your name. “(Y/N)!”, Bennett called out to you and ran into your direction. A deep sigh left your throat, while you enjoyed Bennett’s company most of the time… you had to deal with a ton of your own bad luck today. Not one of the commissions today went the way they usually did, everything that could’ve gone wrong did go wrong. It was honestly just very frustrating, although you couldn’t be really sure if it was because of bad luck or because your mind was somewhere else most of the day. You shook your head, trying to get rid of the tiredness you already felt in your whole body and made your way towards Bennett. No matter what he needed help with you would be sure you could handle it. And in that moment, as the thought of how it wouldn’t be a big deal whatever Bennett had on his chest, you saw how the young adventure tripped over his own feet and fell face forwards into the dirt. ‘Ouch, that must’ve hurt’, you thought while running up to him. “Are you hurt? Here, let me help you up Bennett”, you asked while helping him get up from the ground. All you got as an answer from him was his usual laugh and smile. “Oh man, I really didn’t see that stone. Haha, thanks for the concern though!” You couldn’t help yourself and chuckled at the way he wiped off the dirt from his clothes. “So, what’s up? What do you want from me?.” “Yeah, right! I nearly forgot!”, he exclaimed and started fumbling in his bag. “Oh, got a present for me?”, you asked sheepishly. “Kinda, not really. Here!” Bennett held a letter in his hands, both bandaged again, and stretching it out to you. “A letter? For me?”, you took it in your hands. In a fine handwriting there was your name on it. It didn’t even took you a second for you to register who’s hand writing it was. What a surprise.

Before you could even start to ask Bennett how he got his hands on the letter he was already excitedly explaining it to you. “Today I had a commission on Dragonspine and to be honest, it didn’t really went that well until I ran into this one guy. I accidentally activated a few Ruin guards and well, even the most seasoned adventurer can’t fight more than one of these at a time and sadly the newest members of Benny’s adventure team had to go home again before we made it even to the mountain.”

The thought of Bennett nearly finding his end today on Dragonspine really… it really did not sit right with you. You made a mental note to ask him later who the new members were that ditched him. After you had your talk with them they wished they had stayed with Bennett on Dragonspine. “Well, in that moment when they approached me that one guy showed up and it only took him a few minutes to defeat them all. (Y/N) that was so cool! I tried to recruit him for my adventure team, but sadly he said he was already occupied with something else. Oh man, it would’ve been so cool to have him on my adventurer team, imagine with such an excellent fighter no one would be afraid of my bad luck to join my team.” While you enjoyed Bennett’s enthusiasm you had to interrupt him. “Wait, wait, Bennett. The person who gave you this letter is on Dragonspine?”

“Oh yeah! As I was saying I tried to recruit him for my team, but failed however we talked a bit and somehow he mentioned that he knew you! When I told him we were friends he asked me to give you this letter the next time I saw you.”

You felt how the excitement in you grew. He was on Dragonspine? He was so close to you again? Now you hardly could pay attention to what Bennett continued to say, all that was on your mind was the man, whom you saw the last time months ago in Liyue was so close again. “Bennett,” you interrupted him again. “Thank you so much for the letter, but I really need to get going. Thank you so much!”

And with that you changed your direction and made your way directly to Dragonspine. “Oh? Okay, bye (Y/N)!”, you heard Bennett call after you, but your mind was already occupied with opening that letter he gave you.

With shaking hands you read what stood on that thin paper in that neat and familiar handwriting:

“Hey, comrade! How have you been? You must have traveled far and wide since we last saw each other, right?

For me, I can only seek out some entertainment for myself. These past couple of days, I’ve used a work opportunity to explore Dragonspine and seek out some local specialties. I hope they will be of use to you.

The harsh cold of the snow-capped mountains is reminiscent to the scenery of my hometown…

Sigh, I’ve had many mundane days that makes me nostalgic of our time together. Whether it’s a fight or a challenge, I always feel that having you around is what makes life really interesting.

Haha, to be honest, I’ve been planning a special day to meet up with you, today could be that chance! If you have no special plans, how about you swing by my place?

I miss you, Tartaglia”

Quickly you put the letter in your bag with what accompanied it and now you were basically running towards Dragonspine. Right now you didn’t want to think about what kind of “work opportunity” there could be for the Harbringer on Dragonspine, all you could think about was seeing him again.

It has been months since you both parted ways in Liyue. You met him while being on a commission, funnily enough it was a bit similar how Bennett ran into him today. In one of Liyues ruins you looked for a book some historian in Liyue Harbour desperately tried to get their hands on. By the amount of Mora they were willing to pay it should’ve been obvious to you that it wasn’t a one-person mission… and still, you went alone into those ruins. You had no problem in destroying the first two ruin guards you ran into, but when three activated at the same time… If it weren’t for Tartaglia back then you would probably be dead. At first you were very thankful for his help, however when you found out he was also there for the book you needed your thankfulness quickly turned into anger. “Well, don’t you think I deserve a reward for helping you out, comrade?”, he teased you.

After that day you somehow always managed to run into him in Liyue Harbour or on your commissions. Back then you only knew him by his name used by the Fatui, Childe. Though it was well known in Liyue that he was one of the Harbringers, you somehow didn’t get that message after months of openly antagonising him. Only after Childe invited himself to your usual afternoon teas with your friend Zhongli you learned about his affiliations, but also more about him. If someone was hearing two people bickering, the people of Liyue knew it was you two. However none of it was malicious. Somehow it was the way you and Childe showed each other the appreciation you had for one another.

The first dislike you had for him grew quickly into a warm friendship. And that friendship grew in something more after awhile.

The first time you noticed a change in your feelings towards Childe was around the time of the Lantern rite festival. One night you were supposed to meet up with Zhongli - but Childe showed up in his instead. Apparently, so Childe, there was a lot to do at the Parlour because of a new promotion the director wanted to try and needed Zhonglis help with, so Zhongli asked Childe to accompany you to the Lantern rite.

Until this day you weren’t sure if this was just a set up by Zhongli, but even if it was, you wouldn’t hold it against him.

That night, when you and Childe walked around Liyue Harbour and watched the lanterns something fundamentally changed between the two of you. After that night you knew so much more about him and he about you. From that day on he wasn’t Childe anymore, he was Tartaglia. And both of you finally knew how the lips of the other felt on your own.

Now you were so close again to feel his warm arms around you, to listen to the sound of his heartbeat when you rested your head on his chest and to feel his lips on yours again. Oh how you missed him too.

Parting ways wasn’t easy. Both of you knew that it was best to not be so public with your relationship, for several reasons. On the one hand the Fatui weren’t what you would call popular - most people would use some stronger word to describe them. Being a Mondstadt citizen in Liyue openly dating a member of the Fatui, yeah no. On the other it was also not really well liked by the Tsaritsa for the members of the Fatui, no matter if you were just a low henchman or a Harbringer, to get involved in that way with outsides. With “not well liked” it was more implied that she forbade any romantic relationships outside and inside the Fatui ranks when they were on a mission. And Tartaglia was on a mission, a mission you knew nothing about, but to be honest? You preferred it that way. The longer you were able to ignore what it meant for him to be part of the Fatui, the better.

So because of all of this you both decided it would be best to keep the relationship in the shadows.

You both knew for sure was that you had to part ways one day, however none of you expected that you were the one going home before Tartaglia. There were a lot of nights of laying in bed with him, sharing stories from each of your homes. You told him about the Windblume Festival and Ludi Hapestrum, he told you about the festivals and traditions of Snezhnaya. When you shared stories of how your little siblings and you loved to collect as many dandelions as possible when you were children to pretend that it was snowing in the summer, he would counteract that story with the times he built entire fortresses with his siblings out of the snow in the winter. Only to then pull you closer and whisper in your ear that he’ll show you how to do that when you come with him back to Snezhnaya. You would always whisper back “okay, but first you’d need to glide with me off Startsnatch cliff”. The lovely nights you both spend together, telling each other of your homes and how much you want to show it to them were harshly interrupted by a letter you got from your family.

Life sometimes isn’t fair. It’s hard and it brutal and it’s short. So when you got the letter from your family informing you that the youngest member of the family had died, it broke you to pieces. They were only 14. That night Tartaglia held you in his arms, his hand on the back of your head, your head pressed into his chest and none of you could say a word. Only the sound of you crying piercing the quite room. Too heavy was the grief for anything to be said anyways.

The day immediately after you received that letter you and Tartaglia parted way, a quite and sad goodbye. None of you were actually sure when you would see each other again. With his hands against your tear stained face, the tears not only being shed out of grief but also out of the pain you had to leave your lover, he promised to write you as often as he could. You promised you would answer. And then you left, wishing he could come with you. Words you did not dare to speak, because you knew he couldn’t, no matter how much he wanted to.

Now you found yourself close to one of the Fatui camps on Dragonspine. It was quite irresponsible to just run up the mountain, without any proper preparation or knowledge where Tartaglias camp actually was. You sighed. The excitement of seeing him after such a long time, after just exchanging letters got the best of you. Frustrated with yourself you made your way towards the campsite, hoping that this time the Fatui henchmen wouldn’t immediately start attacking every stranger they see. However when you arrived at the camp site you saw that no one was there. Too exhausted from the commissions earlier in the day and running up the Dragonspine you let yourself fall down in front of the extinguished campfire. Slowly but surly the cold weather of the Dragonspine was catching up to you.

Going through your bag you were looking for the stones Tartaglia send with his letter, hoping to ignite a fire with them. But before you could find them you heart footsteps in the snow behind you.

You hadn’t even had the chance to turn around before you felt two arms looping around your body, immediately warming you up.

“Hey comrade, did you miss me?”

You felt his head on your shoulders and you couldn’t help but to lean your own against his. One of your hands made its way up to his face, touching his cheek. “Yes,” you whispered.

Turning your head you now looked into his deep blue eyes, they were filled with all the love he had for you. You wished he could look at you like this forever… that you could look at him forever.

Tartaglia leaned a bit forward, placing a soft kiss on your lips and you couldn’t help it but smile.

He slowly pulled away, entangling himself from the hug and holding his hand out to you. “Come, let’s go inside the tent. You must be freezing out here”.

Inside the tent Tartaglia threw one blanket on another blanket over another over you, while lecturing you on what appropriate clothing was for a weather like this. You really didn’t give it any second thought when you made your way to Dragonspine, still wearing the same clothes you would wear on a sunny day in Mondstadt. But you also couldn’t hide it how much you loved to just hear his voice, even when he was nagging you. “It’s fine really, now stop trying to bury me under all the blankets and warm me up yourself”, you took his hand and pulled him towards you onto the plank. “You know some people would find what you said very suggestiv”, he joked, joining you under the immense amount of blankets. “Mmmmh,” was the only thing you replied, completely enamoured with him having you by your side again. For a few minutes the both of you just laid there, close to each other and feeling each other’s heartbeat.

None of you could actually believe your luck to be in the arms of the other again. How much you had missed this. Missed him.

“Hey,” he spoke softly, making you look into his eyes again. “How you’ve been doing?”.

It was such a soft question and you knew what he meant. You wanted to tell him how exhausting everything has been since your arrival, how your family was breaking apart at all ends, what a shit show it all was. In your letters you only alluded to how bad it actually is. How it was all just made worse by him not being at your side. Though you knew you would have to tell him all of this sooner or later, right now you didn’t want to talk about it. Not in detail. Not when today was actually his special day. “It’s manageable, but better now that I’m here with you”, you replied to his question. “You?”

“Better, now that I have you here”, was his reply. You both smiled at each other, a warm and tender smile. Slowly you adjusted your position so that you now were laying on top of him, your chin on his chest. “Hey, there is something I forgot to tell you.”

“Oh, and what is it?”

“Happy Birthday, Tartaglia”, and with that you kissed him.

[takanova12]

Lost Girls

nothing special just why I love the bond between mikaannie :)

Mikasa and annie's friendship is one of my favourite things about the final arc. To think that their relationship has progressed from mikasa cutting annie's fingers to her latching onto annie's hand to launch into enemy titans?? Nothing much just some killer teamwork!! They just knew no words nothing just one look from each other and bam annie throwing mikasa at OKAPI! They have just come to trust and understand each other that well. I have a headcanon after this chapter that in the future, annie teaches mikasa some of her martial art skills. I also imagine them being best friends, because well they are both lost girls and also because they have similar personalities (yet some differences too such as annie's snarky and blunt, while mikasa is shy and quiet) I feel like together they would bring out the best in each other. And keeping in mind that isayama did want to mikasa to return to her old self, which is being the happy little girl she once was, having annie as a friend creates more opportunities for that. Also, mikasa brings out a soft side in annie, she sees that mikasa like her is someone that deeply drives meaning from her relationships. For annie it's her dad, but recently it has been armin. They had both been striving throughout the story to protect those bonds, that's why annie breaks down when she hears that her father is likely dead and she comes back to help the alliance because she can still help armin. Also, doesn't hurt that both mikasa and annie have as levi likes to call it "gloomy" personalities so it's probably easier to be around each other.

Their camaraderie doesn't just end at the battlefied, in fact they have constantly been able to comfort each other in times when no one else could. Mikasa understood that annie didn't wana fight anymore and likewise annie knew it's extremely painful to ask mikasa to kill eren. The fact that mikasa is with them on this journey that is about stopping/killing eren itself is a emotionally exhausting task for her. While the scouts are not wrong in pushing mikasa towards it, it was just a very considerate move on annie's part. She grabbed mikasa by the collar ( that's how comfortable annie is with the girl she has called a beast in the past :) and assured her that she doesn't have to do anything she doesn't want to.

Before they were bickering about their priorities and now they are respecting each other's. I liked how annie didn't forget that the azumabitos are important to mikasa and first thing she does is informs mika about it.

While this post is about mikaannie, I would like to just add that I don't think people give mikasa credit for mingling with warriors as smoothly as the others. I know everyone else has too, but the 104th were empathsizing with bert, reiner and ymir even back in volume 12 , while mikasa tried to shut off those emotions. She told historia and ymir that she can't show anyone mercy because these people took away her home. And now she is doing the opposite of it so doesn't that count as development? Post timeskip Mikasa has time and again shown that she understands that the world is not as black and white, she was disappointed in what eren did in liberio, she even reminded eren that they have been able to get along with some marleyans, she saved gabi and has not been actively at anyone's throat for eren's sake. She didn't bust eren out of jail, she knew eren was in the wrong. And now she is not fighting with the warriors or anyone about protecting eren, it's just a desperate plea from someone who is on the verge of losing her home. People are free to dislike her, but Idk maybe I am trying to say cut her some slack? Eren is such an important part of mikasa's life because it was when she met him that she realized " This world is cruel" , which is really depressing if you you think about it like don't just skim over this dialogue as something trivial, give it some thought....Then eren wraps the scarf around her and mikasa is like " The world is cruel but also beautiful" SHE GOT THE BEAUTIFUL PART FROM EREN!! So, if she is refusing to let go of the beautiful don't undermine her for that. Mikasa letting eren go is not about eren it's about her accepting that while eren showed her the beauty in this world, she can still find beauty even if he is not beside her. Kiyomi is there to remind mikasa that she has a home, that people other than eren and armin care about her like family. Now she has found a friend in annie too.

Sorry for going off on a tangent. Mikasa is my comfort character and once I start talking about her it's hard to shut me up lol.

Lastly, THIS! Are we still reading attack on titan?

Mikasa: There! That one, that pig or whatever titan that is!

Annie: Which one?

Mikasa: That one! Over there that thing!

Annie: Where?

And when annie finally tells her that pig looking thing is an Okapi, Mikasa goes

I swear I never knew mikasa and annie being friends would be a thing, specially not them having such an interestingly funny and tender dynamic.

TMI: Btw, pieck was great this chapter too. I do like characters other than mikasa, but mikasa is a very precious character to me and this blog is my safe place of actualizing my adoration for Mikasa and Eremika <3

Thank you for reading! I think many of us who are enjoying mikasa and annie's bond feel this way so I am just glad to share it with you.

[thebadbatch]

Hii, can I request Crosshair being send by the empire to delay a rebel politician reader with the excuse of protecting her, but it happens to be a mission longer than expected and they start bonding and such? Thank you

A /N: l hope this is what you were looking for! I really liked writing this one so it's longer than the other oneshots I've written because I got carried away!

Imperial!Crosshair x Fem!RebelSenate

Plot: The empire have taken over the planet you try to protect and you've been assigned an imperial guard to protect you from the Bounty Hunter's who want you dead or for their own use. Crosshair ends up being your guard and connections blossom throughout the ongoing mission.

Warnings: Detailed description of Violence and a light mention of blood.

------------

Delay

"Why on Stars would you think I'd accept somebody from the Empire to protect me?" You shouted, anger clearly coating your voice as you spoke to your helpers. One sighed and stood forward, gently walking with you through the large and rather extravagant hallways of the place you were assigned to stay. "Don't you understand I'm a rebel? I speak for peace." Your helper nodded lightly, doing her best to remain professional.

"The planet you speak for is under the Empire now, my lady." She paused as you both continued to walk where you'd be greeted with the being who said they'd have to protect you. Things didn't feel right though, it was all so sudden but you had no choice but to leave your questions unanswered otherwise the Empire would silence you once and for all. "Please, allow them to give you their protection - just until things calm down." Nodding slightly in agreement you couldn't help but sigh as imperial ships came into view, storm troopers littering the streets whilst an admiral came to greet you whilst a darker clothed storm trooper stood behind him.

"Ah, senator y/n - I'm glad to hear the news that you've accepted our protection from bounty hunters set to kill you." Rolling your eyes, you soon narrowed your gaze onto him.

"Well it's not like I had much of a choice, is it?" Your words were coated in venom which only made the admiral laugh lightly  sending wary shivers down your spine. You had spent years giving people hope, but now you were working alongside the very thing you swore to destroy.

"I'm sure time with your newly assigned guard will change your view of things and you'll give out a good word for the Empire." The trooper stepped forward and removed his helmet to place it under his arm. His hair was a light silver, an interesting mark lay over his eye which only left you with burning questions. "This trooper is named Crosshair, he's the current leader of our newly formed Elite squad. This building will be on complete lockdown until the bounty hunters are eliminated, our trooper will be sure to defend you with his life."

"Yes sir." Crosshair confirmed, his voice was filled with mystery and confidence which just made you shiver.

"I appreciate your time and service, admiral." You had to practically bite your tongue to muster out those words. There was no other choice but to go along with it until there was some sort of reliable plan to get out of here. 

Turning your attention to Crosshair you thought the day through, "Come then, i'll show you around." He nodded and began to trail after you, a serious expression glued to his face. Showing him each individual area on the floor you were assigned to did take some time, but it was worth the protection and the longer this lasted the longer you could take to think up a plan to leave. "This is the final room, the Sleeping quarters. There are separate beds so I do hope you're not too fussed on sharing." He took a light breath in as he looked around, walking to the empty bed which would be his.

"That's not an issue." Sitting on your own bed, you watched as he did the same on his. The beds were opposite one another which gave him the best view to ensure you were safe at any given time.

"Well since we shall be spending a week or so cooped up together I thought that we could get to know one another." You attempted a smile towards him, one in which he didn't hesitate on not returning. Everybody from the Empire were so miserable and they were treated so horribly so you understood. "My name's y/n and I'm a politician reader on behalf of the rebels, I believe in hope and peace and know that it shall be achieved one day." A moment or so went by with no response from him, "How about you?" He shifted slightly against the blankets, moving his firepuncher rifle into his hands in a swift moment.

"I'm Crosshair, a sniper and currently your guard. I work alongside the Empire because they did not abandon me, they took me in." Tilting your head to the side slightly, you gave him a questioning gaze. 

"Who abandoned you?" He gave out a hollow chuckle, wiping a spec of dust that had rested against his rifle. 

"Nobody of your concern." 

"You know that there are better places than the Empire? People who will view you as family and not an irrelevant number they can just replace." His eyes narrowed at you as he spoke.

"I'm sick of playing 'families', I'm happy where I am." You soon decided to drop the conversation, not fully willing to make the man who was supposed to protect your life hate you. Allowing silence to fill the room once again, you soon felt comfortable with it. This would only last a few weeks at most, you could get through it.

A week had passed since Crosshair was assigned as your guard and no attempt on your life had been made yet which you found rather surprising. Time had dragged by pretty surprisingly and you couldn't help but start talking outloud to Crosshair who didn't really respond but you knew he was listening and that's all you needed.

"... And that's why I absolutely dislike the dark." His comm soon beeped, and a different voice was heard filling the room for the first time in the week you shared together.

"A breach has occured, keep y/n safe and with you. We cannot risk her life being taken when she will be valuable to us." The voice fell silent as Crosshair replied quickly, placing his helmet over his head.

"Sir, yes sir." Standing he grabbed his rifle and turned toward you, "Let's go." He walked out of the room you were both in and this time you were the one trailing behind him anxiety and fear filling your chest rapidly. 

"Where are we going?" You asked, trying not to let your voice shake with fear as his pace grew quicker toward a different room. 

"A more secure room, preferably without windows." A loud shatter from behind you accompanied his words before a hand gripped onto yours pulling you into their chest. Before you could realize what was happening, a blaster was against your head and a hand against your throat which made it difficult to breathe. Crosshair had just as quickly pointed his rifle to the person trying to take your life, tension filling the air alongside your jagged and desperate breaths. "Let the girl go." The person simply laughed and stepped back toward the window which only made Crosshair put pressure against the trigger. 

"What makes you think I'll let her go? She belongs with us - her skills could be vital for my kind." He snarled lightly in response as your breaths turned into light whimpers, your hands trying to pry the person's grip off of your neck.

"C-cross-" You whimpered out, voice filling the room. You couldn't see Crosshairs expression behind his helmet, but at your voice calling his name his face flashed with concern, worry and then anger. He didn't hesitate as he pulled the trigger, hitting the person in the head. The grip was freed from around your neck, red marks being left around your neck as you fell. Shattered glass cut into your hand, blood soon trailing down your skin. Crosshair picked you up all whilst activating his comm system.

"The threat has been neutralized." He took a soft breath before carrying you to the room you both shared, sitting you softly on your bed. "Requesting a clean up on the third floor." He ended the communication as he reached for the medkit in one of the draws, crouching before you and tending to your hand. 

"Thank you..." You mumbled, watching him tend to your hand so carefully made your heart swell - it was a sweet action but something you assumed he was hired to do.

"I'm just following orders." He responded as he finished clearing your hand up - his fingertips moving across the red marks upon your skin. You watched his face turn into anger as he viewed the marks, applying some bacta to soothe the sting. "I won't let them touch you again." In all honesty, you felt terrified - everything suddenly felt so real and who knew how many more times an attempt would be taken on your life? Exhaling a shaky breath, you nodded at his words and you finally allowed him all of your trust. His eyes seemed gentle as he gazed at you, only kindness filling them as he stood. "I suggest you get some rest now, y/n - I'll keep watch over you." He pulled the blankets back for you before he moved to his own bed sitting on the edge gripping his rifle as his eyes scanned outside the window. After climbing into bed you felt the previous shock begin to calm down, the absence of the adrenaline leaving you feeling empty and cold along with the realization that your life was on the line kicking in.

"Crosshair?" You gently called his name, "Can you stay a little closer?" Your question felt out of character for you, but things were just so terrifying and uncertain that you were desperate for some comfort - especially from the man who had just saved your life. He didn't respond so you assumed he just ignored your question rather than saying no. Your doubts soon left though as you felt a weight beside you on your bed, Crosshair sitting beside your tired self. "Thank you." You whispered, the room falling into a comfortable silence as his hand rested against your leg covered by the blanket. Sleep was quick to overtake you, all of your previous worry seemingly melting away at his touch. With him beside you, the week ahead would be bearable for sure.

Plans had changed at the news of more bounty hunters being assigned to take you out or with them, now Crosshair was staying for longer until the Empire had things under control. A month had passed since the attempt on your life and you had both grown closer than ever. During your rants he would always respond willingly and help out with things whenever he could for you, in fact you both managed to become close with one another. 

"So," You hummed as he turned his attention toward you, "when do you think they'll let you go back?" He shrugged lightly as he walked closer to you, helmet under his arm.

"Soon." Those words seemed to shatter your heart into literal pieces. "But I have no intention of leaving."  A smile crept onto your lips as you moved closer toward him, eyes lit up like a city at night. Your hands held his own as thoughts raced around your head at an incredible speed,

"Why don't I make you my permanent guard? I'm sure the Empire will be overjoyed that I've taken a liking to their services…" You didn't miss the smirk that placed itself onto his lips, his hands softly squeezing your own. Before he could speak, his comm system lit up again.

"Trooper, are you prepared to move out? We have another mission assigned." Your eyes met him in a gentle gaze praying to the stars that he'd stay alongside you.

"Actually, there's been a delay- a proposition has been made which I'm sure will benefit the Empire." The comm fell silent as You moved closer into his arms before the communication device lit up in confirmation,

"Understood. Take your time." With that, you held his face and met your lips with hisin a gentle get loving kiss. Pulling away you couldn't help but sheepishly grin at him - a rare smile of his falling back onto his face which you adored.

"You'll stay with me?" You asked, voice beyond helpful as he moved closer to you.

"I'll stay - I don't want to leave you like they left me." Nodding softly, you offered him a smaller smile.

"I won't ever leave you Cross like they did, I love you." His lips met yours once again before you both came up with a detailed plan on keeping him with you whilst still getting your hope filled messages out there. You were going to take down the Empire one way or another, but now you had Crosshair with you which made everything better. It was you two against the galaxy for years to come.

"I love you too."