#i am not sure who im pulling for next but im sooo tempted to go for sparkle eidolons

[lorelune]

got sparkle and her lc with like... 60 wishes 2 spare...

[horansqueen]

AM Conversations : chapter 31

A Niall Horan fanfiction ; rated MA

CHAPTER 1 || CHAPTER 2 || CHAPTER 3 || CHAPTER 4 || CHAPTER 5 || CHAPTER 6 || CHAPTER 7 || CHAPTER 8 || CHAPTER 9 || CHAPTER 10 || CHAPTER 11 || CHAPTER 12 || CHAPTER 13 || CHAPTER 14 || CHAPTER 15 || CHAPTER 16 || CHAPTER 17 || CHAPTER 18 || CHAPTER 19 || CHAPTER 20 || CHAPTER 21 || CHAPTER 22 || CHAPTER 23 || CHAPTER 24 || CHAPTER 25 || CHAPTER 26 || CHAPTER 27 || CHAPTER 28 || CHAPTER 29 || CHAPTER 30

NOTES:

-one chapter is her pov, the next is his. -4.5k -im sorry, i never proofread, i hate it. -there WILL be smut. but not only smut. -this is a romance, comedy, smut story. -for the summary, check my MASTERLIST.

- if you want to be notified when this is updated, please message me or leave a comment!

- you can send me questions and theories and comments. tbh they all make me SO SO SO SOOOO HAPPY! and make me want to write more! you can also tell me if there are things you WANT to happen. you never know, i may add it :P

- thanks for being patient btw! i work a lot these days and will work even more in the next few weeks (until halloween) so i may not update as often as i’d like. :(

- note for this chapter: i hope its not too bad. im scared ppl are gonna lose interest tbh. and i know, so many dialogues but it was needed!

-please, message me, give me feedbacks, it would mean sooo much to me!

Chapter 31 : Her chapter

OLIVIA

I woke up the next day a bit disoriented. I couldn't remember when exactly I fell asleep but as soon as my eyes opened, I felt my lips curl. Niall was laying next to me and we were both facing each other. He was still asleep and I brought my hand to his cheek, making him whimper very low. Slowly, I moved closer and pressed my lips on his gently, leaving a small and soft kiss on his mouth. His eyes fluttered half-open and when he saw me, his lips curled. It made my bite my bottom lip when I realized I hadn't seen him this happy in a while. Niall was someone who was always smiling but at this exact moment, it was even more than that. Or perhaps it was the reflection of my own happiness that I could see on his face.

He didn't say anything, he just moved closer to kiss my lips again, making them curl. I brought my hand over my mouth and smiled more.

"Hi."

He chuckled and also brought his hand in front of his mouth.

"Hi." he repeated. "Morning breath?"

"Would be bad if it was the first impression you had of me in the morning."

This time, he laughed and i felt my heart melt in my chest.

"I've smelled your morning breath and been a witness of more." he pointed out with what I guessed was a smirk from the way the corner of his eyes moved up. "Those little futile things won't change my love for you."

I could feel my heart flutter at the same time than my eyes when I heard his words.

"I woke up facing you like this so many times. I've wanted to kiss you so many times. This is the first time I actually do it. I never thought I would."

He stared at me and took his hand away. He was not smirking anymore, just smiling softly at me. I never thought Niall would ever look at me this way. I wouldn't have dared to wish for it.

"Fuck morning breath." he just said moving closer to me and getting half his body on top of mine before pushing my hand gently away and kissing me. It took me a few seconds to allow him to deepen the kiss but eventually I did. I closed my eyes, enjoying the way he kissed me and the warmth of his body over mine until he groaned in my mouth. "How did you sleep?"

I tried to think of an answer but all I could focus on was the way his lips ran down on my neck and how good they felt on my skin. I wanted to lock myself with him in his room for weeks like our own private and deserted island, leaving reality behind.

His phone started ringing and he groaned, his lips stopping on my collarbone. He simply sighed and I grimaced before he got up and searched for his phone through the pockets of the pants he wore the day before. It was not his type to leave dirty clothes on the floor but it seemed like both of us were distracting the other and I couldn't hide that I liked it.

"Hello?" he quickly answered without checking the caller ID... and with the way his face changed, I believed he shouldn't have had. "Oh hi."

I sat in bed and tilted my head, feeling suddenly a bit stressed, wondering who was on the phone but also annoyed, because whoever it was, they were clearly disturbing our alone time like some sort of ship running aground on the beach of my private island. I pushed on the covers and turned to face him, crossing ,my legs as I sat on the end of the bed.

"No, sorry, I'm busy tonight." Niall continued, turning to look at me before sending me a small smile. "I'm spending time with my girlfriend."

I held my breath and Niall stopped moving. After a few seconds, he raised his eyebrows and rolled his eyes. "No, I don't mean my friend who is a girl, I really mean the girl i'm officially dating. My girlfriend." Silence. "Okay, bye."

He hung up and sighed, throwing his phone on the bed and looking through his drawers for a clean pair of boxers that he just took out.

"Who was it?" I didn't want to seem invasive but the question was burning my lips.

"Oh." he just said with a shrug, glancing at me. "It was Heidi."

The simple mention of her name made my heart jump in my throat, making me slightly nauseous. I was not sure if it was because I was jealous or scared but all I knew was that Niall had sex with her a few times and that it was probably why she was calling. I wanted to ask him to delete her number or even block it but I knew I couldn't. I was trying not to be that kind of girlfriend, the type who gets insecure about every little thing that happens, and every girl her boyfriend talks to, but it wasn't easy. Niall and I were clearly not in the same league and although I knew love is not about physical appearances, I couldn't help but be nervous about all of this.

I suddenly felt extremely self-conscious but also mad at myself for letting someone like Heidi ruin my mood.

"I need a shower." he let out, taking me out of my thoughts. "Wanna come with?"

My mind suddenly went blank and my lips parted slightly as I stared at him. Did I want to see Niall naked and wet in the shower? Fuck yes. Did I want to stand in front of him in my birthday suit? Hell no.

"You reek too, by the way." he added with a smirk, taking his shirt off and throwing it in the laundry basket before turning back to me again and raising his eyebrows.

"Uhm."

I couldn't talk and I couldn't move. I could feel my heart beat all over my body, not really knowing what to answer. He knelt in front of me with a worried expression and placed his hands on my thighs. I could feel how warm they were, even through the fabric of his sweatpants that I was wearing, and it made me swallow hard. I was so scared to do or say something that would make me lose him that I could barely think straight. I had to do something about it before it ruined the relationship I had with him. As lovers, but also as best friends.

"Tempting, but no, i'll just go after you."

I tried to look normal and sent him a smile but he frowned a bit before nodding and getting up again. He bent down to kiss my lips and it sent a rush to my brain. I already regretted saying no but I knew i'd regret a 'yes" even more when i'd be naked in front of him.

I realized I was holding my breath when I sighed as soon as I heard the shower start and I closed my eyes, feeling suddenly ridiculous. Niall was now my boyfriend, and he said he loved me... he wouldn't change his mind because of what I look like naked, would he?

I sighed loud and lied back down in bed, grabbing my phone and crossing my ankles together. I couldn't help it and searched Niall's name on google only to find recent articles about him. There were pictures of us kissing at the bar and although it was from afar and not very clear, I felt extremely ugly. 'It's official! Niall Horan finally dating lifelong friend!'

My heart jumped in my chest when I realized the article started with 'After years of friendship, it is without a surprise that Niall Horan is finally seen kissing his childhood friend...' My eyes roamed on the sentence twice, three times... ten. 'Without a surprise'?

I scrolled down to the comments section and started nibbling on my bottom lip. I knew that whatever I would read would end uip hurting me but it was stronger than me. I was not the type to really care about what people thought of me but despite what anyone may tell you, reading mean things about yourself sucks and hurts.

'Can't believe she dated both Harry and Niall! Talk about a dream life! 😍'

'I have no idea how that ugly girl got one of them let alone both. 🤔 It makes no sense'

'They are so adorable!!!!!'

'He fucking deserves better have you seen her? 🤮'

'He lost a bet 😂😂😂'

'OTP OTP OTP 🥰'

I shut my eyes tight again and threw my phone on the bed before groaning low. All I could see behind my eyelids was a parade of emojis and I did the best I could to hold my tears in. I knew Niall was out of my league but some people could be so cruel when hiding behind a computer screen. The shower stopped and when Niall came back in the room, he was followed by a cloud of steam. I looked at him quickly from head to toes, enjoying the view as he walked up to me with only a towel around his waist.

"My turn!" I just said, jumping out of bed. He stopped me as I walked by and pulled me closer, making me chuckle low.

"You're all wet!" I complained jokingly, making him laugh.

"Then just take your clothes off."

His fingers reached for the top of my shirt and he pulled gently on the collar to move it down as his eyes dropped in. I felt my heart jump in my chest and shook my head, taking a step back and making him groan low.

"Pervert!" I added with a chuckle, walking to the bathroom.

I turned around and before closing the door, I stuck my tongue out at him, making him laugh again but I still locked behind myself. I knew my fear and my hatred for my own body was stopping me from living some great things with Niall but I just didn't feel ready to show him all of me. I just wanted him to think I was beautiful. I wanted to turn him on, I wanted him to want me the way I wanted him.

I brushed my teeth first and quickly got undressed and started the waterI stayed a bit longer than I should have in the shower, letting the warm water fall on me and relaxing me as the memories of the night before played over and over in my mind. It was still incredible and unbelievable to me that Niall had finally realized he had feelings for me too but it was my reality now and It felt like I would never get down from my cloud.

I got out of the shower, drying my hair the best I could with a towel before wrapping it around my body and remembering that I left my clothes in the room. I raised my nose up and inhaled deeply before going back. I frowned when I saw him laying in bed in only a pair of boxers and my phone in hands. He looked at me and sighed, turning the phone my way to show me the article I had been reading while he was in the shower.

"I'm sorry I checked your phone it's just..." he sighed again and shook his head. "You shouldn't read shit like that. You know those mean comments aren't true, right?"

I held my towel to make sure it wouldn't fall and sent him a sad smile, walking to the bed. He sat on it and I shrugged as he looked up, wrapping his arms around me.

"Liv, please, listen to me." he let out in a low but worried tone. "I feel so lucky to be with you. You are beautiful and I love you." he paused but he kept staring at me. "Olivia, I love you."

"It's just..." I closed my eyes and sighed, feeling him hold me tighter against him. "I don't know."

"Talk to me, okay?"

I nibbled on my bottom lip and finally just nodded. He let go of me and lied back down in bed, leaving space for me. I lied down next to him, leaning my head on his shoulder as he wrapped his arm around me. I felt secure suddenly and the fact that we weren't looking at each other anymore made it slightly easier.

"You've never seen me naked." I just pointed out.

"That's... correct." he seemed a bit confused. "And i'd like to change that."

My lips curled in a fond smile.

"I mean, I don't know what you're expecting but you may be disappointed." I tried to explain, feeling his arm pull me closer. "I am not shaped like Maya or Heidi or those girls you normally end up with."

Silence. All I could hear was the sound of my heart beating against my chest. He started drawing shapes on the skin of my arm with his fingertip and It made a shiver cross my body as my heart skipped a beat. It reminded me of that time at the movies...

"I only had sex with Maya a few times." he confessed, making me frown.

"Like, how many times?"

"I don't know, four?"

I knew they had dated for a while and it was surprising that they hadn't had sex more often. Clearly, she wanted him and no one could not want her. I frowned more, a bit confused by it but also wondering why exactly he was telling me that.

"Why?"

My question was not clear but I knew he'd understand.

"I couldn't." he explained, shrugging a shoulder. "I couldn't because I only wanted you."

I couldn't help but let out a chuckle. It was laughable to think someone had the chance to bang a girl like Maya but couldn't because they wanted me more.

"I guess my love for you made it impossible for me to lust after an other girl." he continued. "I don't know what you're scared of but I know I want you more than I've ever wanted anyone else. And I won't be disappointed because it'll be you. And that's all I want. You."

I let my eyes roam on his body and I couldn't deny that I wanted him, too. I had never wanted anyone the way I wanted him. Obviously, this relationship was based on more than sex but it seemed to be an issue and I understood that he wanted to solve it. I also wanted to share everything with him. We had never really talked about sex together, at least not about our personal sex life. It's not that it embarrassed me but I didn't want to hear about the girls he had sex with and what he did with them. it would have been too hard to hear because of my love for him and for that reason, I also kept my stories a secret to make sure he wouldn't tell me his. It was a precaution I took to avoid my heart being too broken and so far, it had worked.

"Remember when we were in my room and you were about to check in a drawer and I told you not to?" I started in a low voice, raising my eyebrows without looking at him. "It was not because of my underwear.. It's just that... it's the place I keep my vibrators."

His fingers stopped moving on my shoulder and I held my breath, a small smile playing on my lips. I hadn't expected to admit that to him and obviously, he hadn't expected to hear it either.

"Plural?"

"Yes."

We remained in silence for a while and he finally chuckled.

"That's so hot." he admitted, laughing a bit. "There's so many things I don't know about you when it comes to sex, Liv, and I'd love to talk about it with you."

My traits softened and I looked up at him, moving slightly to get my head on the pillow, my face turned his way. Talking about my body embarrassed me but talking about sex in general didn't and I was totally fine with that discussion.

"Okay, I go first!" I let out with a smirk. "Who's your favorite pornstar? And if you say Jenna Jameson I'm gonna be very disappointed in you."

He sent me an insulted frown, his lips slightly parted, and it made me laugh.

"Do you know me at all?" he just asked, making me laugh. "I don't think I have a favorite, but I guess I enjoy Shyla Jennings."

I raised my nose up and groaned a bit, still looking at him.

"I can't say I'm surprised, and I also can't blame you."

"Why not surprised?" he asked, raising his eyebrows curiously.

"She's your type." I laughed, moving my chin up to look at him better.

"Oh I have a type now?" he wondered as I nodded. "Alright then, who's your fave pornstar?"

My face changed and I shrugged with a small smile.

"Gina Valentina, no second thoughts."

I saw a bunch of emotions cross his face and it made me laugh as he shook his head.

"Wait, what?"

"Oh, you wanted a man?" I asked, amused by the conversation, as I sent him a smirk. "Tyler Nixon, then."

His eyes roamed on my face and I tried to guess what he was thinking about. He was discovering things about me that I never thought he'd know but I was totally fine with it: I had nothing to hide. His lips curled into a small but fond smile and I licked my lips, my eyes never leaving his. I felt his hand take mine and he placed his palm against mine before intertwining out fingers together.

"Tell me something that you did that I would never guess."

His voice was low and the atmosphere in the room had shifted completely. We looked at each other for a few seconds and I licked my lips. He brought his hand on my waist, now completely facing me, and my heart jumped in my chest at how good he looked.

"One time I had a threesome with two other girls."

His eyes opened slightly more and his eyebrows raised up, making me laugh. He held me tighter, his fingers sinking in the fabric of the towel I still had around me, and I knew he had many questions to ask.

"You did too, didn't you?" I kept talking, raising my eyebrows too as my eyes roamed on his face.

"Maybe." he sent me a smirk. "I mean, one time when I was very drunk... it happened. But the whole thing is a bit blurry."

I don't know why but it was a relief that he didn't remember it clearly and I licked my lips. It was ridiculous of me but I couldn't help it. I knew it was impossible but I wanted to be the only girl he'd lust... the one who would make him cum the hardest, the one he could never forget.

"Was it someone you were dating?"

"I was... seeing one of them." he admitted with a groan. "And it sort of killed whatever relationship we could have had."

I nodded slowly. "It was the same for me. We broke up only a few days later."

"When was that?" he asked with a frown, probably trying to remember something he wasn't even there for.

"During your third tour."

It made me realize how little I talked about myself when it came to relationship and how little I knew about him, too. I had met all his official girlfriend, although the number could be counted on the fingers of one hand (and not the whole hand), but I wasn't aware of all the 'maybe's' and 'almost's'.

"Are you scared of what could happen after we make love?" he finally asked after a long silence. "Or what I will think? Say?"

I sighed low and looked away. Every time the discussion switched back to my insecurities, I couldn't seem to look at him in the eyes. I knew he'd be able to read me and it scared me, but I also knew that at some point, i'd have to open up to him, or I would lose him.

I shook my head slightly, looking at our intertwined fingers and It suddenly hit me. If someone was going to be there no matter what, it would be Niall, the way he's always been there.

"I hate my body, I hate the way I look naked, and there's no way you will like it. These people online, your fans, or whatever, they're all right."

The words came out of my mouth and I didn't even think. Everything I said I meant so deep that it hurt. All of this I had thought and believed for so long that expressing them out loud gave me a shiver.

"You're beautiful." he just said in a whisper.

I looked up in his eyes and I could see that he was hurt. I licked my lips and swallowed hard as he let go of my hand to slide it back on the towel around me. He kept staring at me as his hand pulled gently on the fabric and an other shiver ran all over my body, not only because of the cold air hitting suddenly my damp skin but also because of the thought of being naked in front of him. He pushed the towel on the floor and I held my breath, biting my bottom lip and sucking my stomach in. I didn't know why I cared so much, I had no idea why I was so scared after everything he showed and said, but I couldn't help it.

His fingertips ran on my waist and to my hip, ending softly on my thigh and I swallowed hard as he sent me a small smile. Slowly, he moved over me, pushing me on my back, and I moved my chin up to keep eye contact with him. I loved the feeling of his over me, like the weight on my whole body was some sort of protection against everything else, even my own complexes. He bent closer and brushed his lips against mine so gently that I felt my heart twist in my chest.

"You're beautiful and I love you." he whispered, making my lips part lightly.

I couldn't move, I was paralyzed, but I forced myself to keep my eyes open when his lips brushed on my jaw and down my neck. They traveled to my breasts and when I felt his warm tongue on one of them, I whimpered, my body jerking very slightly at the feeling.

I wanted to tell him that I loved him too, that I had never been in love with anyone else and that I never would, but the words got stuck in my throat. His mouth moved to my other nipple and I tried to push away all the questions running in my mind without much success. What did he think? Was he disappointed? Was he still lusting me? Loving me?" Or did he just feel bad for me?

His hand reached for my stomach only a few seconds before his lips and he finally looked up at me, shaking his head from left to right and pressing his fingers gently on my skin.

"Don't do that." he asked in a breath.

It took me a few seconds but I finally exhaled and relaxed my body. His lips curled in a small but find smile and he mouthed a 'thank you', making me swallow hard. I didn't know if he realized the strength it took me and what it implied for me exactly, but he seemed to be grateful and that was enough for now.

Very slowly and softly, he pressed his lips on every inch of my skin as my heart seemed to flutter. I felt dizzy suddenly by the way he showed me love but I still couldn't move. I just focused on his mouth brushing everywhere it could and leaving a burning sensation on my skin. Nothing had ever felt like that before.

His hands glided on my thighs until my knees and he spread them slowly. His lips stopped on my lower stomach and the sight of him between my legs was incredible and way more exciting than anything I had imagined before.

"Is this okay?"

I stared at him a few seconds that seemed to last an hour and he waited, his eyes never leaving mine. I licked my bottom lip but nodded slowly but he kept looking at me as he brought his lips down. I held my breath when his lips left a kiss on my slit and I gripped the sheets with one of my hands.

I was completely naked, the curtains were open and I was with Niall. It was everything I had wished for yet it was also my biggest fear. I tried not to think about it when his fingers ran between my legs and his tongue pressed on my clit, making my body jerk again. It slid down and entered me and my eyes fluttered close as I restrained a curse word from escaping my lips.

"Oh my god." I breathed out, forcing myself to open my eyes if only to look at my boyfriend and burn the image of him eating me out on my retina forever.

His tongue and lips worked between my legs, making them twitch as I got closer and closer to an orgasm but it's only when he started sucking on my clit that my back arched and my eyes finally shut tight.

"F-" I stopped myself and started shaking but he held me down on the mattress with one of his arms as an orgasm crossed my whole body.

I couldn't stop squirming as the intense feeling invaded me from head to toes and it's only when it was gone that I whimpered, feeling both embarrassed and happy at the same time. I felt him crawl up my body and when I finally opened my eyes, he was hovering over me, holding himself with his elbows and smiling down fondly at me.

I felt my heart melt at the way he was looking at me and I smiled back, feeling my heartbeats accelerate. Out of fear, and out of love. I just didn't expect his next words but it brought me near tears.

"I didn't think it was possible, but I love you even more."

[onepunchmiss]

OPM s2e7 Live blog

“The S Class Heroes”

IM SCREAMING ALREADY I ONLY READ THE EPISODE TITLE ALRIGHT OK SO IT BEGINS TODAY, MY DEATH guys I am so pumped for the S Class focus thats about to begin with this episode like from here on out they become main players in the series and asfdbfhirksvfjkevfsnjkvfnjek how is it legal for ONE SERIES to contain SO MANY FAVES. Anywayyy Before I get started I’m actually wondering- this is the 7th episode of the second season… do we know how many episodes the season is supposed to run for? S1 only had 12 i think. I’m… I’m not even close to ready for it ending. Now that they’ve introduced Orochi, I’m not even sure where a good break in the plot would be?? Random concerns aside, lets get to the episode. As always, I’m watching this as someone who has read the manga and web comic to date

OROCHI IS PINK HE IS HOT PINK THATS ALL I HAVE TO SAY BEFORE THE TITLE SEQUENCE HITS ME LIKE A GUT PUNCH EVERY SINGLE TIME AND I STILL PAUSE IT AT ZOMBIEMAN OK off to a great start woo

Oh thank god we’re starting with the tournament I can stop quite literally holding my breath. Alright its Choze time. I’m actually excited for him to do things, his face has been nothing but terrifying thus far and hes one of those characters that are just fun to hate unapologetically. I love over-the-top Nazi stand-ins for that reason tbh

OH FUCK OH GOD I LOVE HIM also GAROU hiya welcome back I know it’s only been 2 weeks but i missed you so much thank you for gracing my screen for 5 seconds OH HECK the dramatic music and beginning of the internal monologue just being blatantly REJECTED caught me off guard I cackled AH WAIT WAIT

EYESIGHT DOGMAN ASDFGHK MY BABY IS COMING IM DEAD IM FUKKIN DEAD ALREADY I MISSED HIS CUTE VOICE hey no wait that was very quick?? I must withhold my bias, we’re at the point now where I have SCRUTINIZED every single panel of the manga over and over because of all of my faves, so even the smallest differences will be glaring to me. As much as I want all the action to be drawn out as it is in the manga, I know that’s never been how the anime has rolled. I must bite my tongue.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA THE ONLY TIME WE’LL EVER SEE HIM AND YET!!! oof i had to pause for 2 minutes to chill out and actually type. I. I just. juST. BOI ARE YOU OK WHERE ARE YOU ARE YOU WELL AND WHY DO YOU LOOK LIKE G4 tell me your secrets

WAIT COME BACK i dont give 2 SHITS about sweet mast HECKK

speaking of whom get off my screen u creep I have a personal bone to pick with u disrespecting the bae as you will

[SCREAMING]

Oh god this whole scene is so EXCITING and TERRIFYING child emperor’s face as Pig God just eats her, speaking of which -QUIT CUTTING BACK TO THAT TERRIFYING IMAGERY ASDFGHJ  

YES THEY KEPT IT YES YES YES YESYEYSYEYS YOU DONT UNDERSTAND how much Ive been looking FORWARD to that little scene??? im crying how is it possible to work myself up so much of this please help

ok ok back to the tournament give my heart a break phew Hey Choze if you’re genes are so superior then where are your eyebrows????? You dont pull it off HALF as well as Z does. Jeez everything about this guy is so absurd I can’t help but laugh irl the damn DNA helix rolling across the screen dude just stop you’re embarrassing yourself

although you DO know how to strike a pose. change ur name to Poze. Wait no. Your name is now GMO Corn I lied.

AGAIN GETTIN ME WITH THE WEIRD COLORS Hundred Eyes Octopuss is red and blue OK SURE

DEATH GATLING DEATH GATLING ASDFGHJKL guys I cant look at Narcisstoic oh no “no you’ll do no good”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I WASNT EXPECTING THIS THIS EPISODE BUT I SHOULD HAVE I WASNT PREPARED I paused it I’m afraid to push play he’s not on the screen yet i can still turn back and make it out alive -

                    Behold.                                     the moment   I          died        

I actually have this thing with eye gore and seeing it in motion fucked me up I had to skip 10 seconds but anyway FUCK he’s so SPARKLY and PRETTY

Noting also the music there totally gave me flashbacks to the Darkmatter Thieves invasion for a split second and that sequence in general was really well done I like how they emphasized the suckers sticking to the concrete and everything- it have the monster a lot of weight imo. Of course the studio would be fools to not give Tatsumaki the the utmost respect like that sooo

SPARKLY and PRETTY and TEMPTING FATE YOU FOOL yo I was so excited to this scene but I feel like they didn’t make his response angry enough it’s funnier when it so uncharacteristically mad I might do a redraw with the face he makes in the manga………….. FUKKIN was smiley face man just yelling noises to cover flashy’s voice???? FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

OH MY FUCK WE’RE GETTING MONSTER CELLS THIS EPISODE. OH MY HECK WE’RE COVERING MUCH MORE GROUND THAN I THOUGHT WE’RE ONLY HALF WAY THROUGH THE EP

plot progression plot progression plo t p r ogr e ss i on hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Kamikaze being the badass that he is i lov

SPEAKING OF LOVES LOOKY LOOK God i love those three Okamaitachi is a WIFE and IAI is a BAE HEY WAIT let them speak come back they said words i want voices!!!!!!!  this is going so fast??? Oh my god I was absolutely not expecting to get the Suiryu fight this episode holy crap holy crap?? Ok but I’m getting pumped the music is hype “trying to hide his nervousness by looking like a doofus” “this is how I always look” Oh saitama why do they do this to you. Jeez as much as I love everyone else I forget how much I miss him. 

Oh and he’s getting his hopes up again sweetheart no

This is so good I’m hardly pausing to type my thoughts I’m too invested AND NOW ALSO IM DIGGING THIS MUSIC this is good v good yes and there goes Saitama being a genuinely good person offended by this jackass Saitama is too good for this world

His voice… I love him sm. aaaaaaaaaaaaaand its over. hmmmmmmmmmmmm so I have a guess as to what the post credits scene will be but let’s just see

YUP I KNEW IT cause we skipped it last week and now that we’ve introduced the monster cells it was only logical Genos no bby stop getting completely obliterated mannnnnnnnn

In all, no real complaints??? My children?? Have began to appear finally??? I just wish they literally went word for word shot for d\shot with Drive Knight if only because I’m STARVED for DK content in general. But based on the pacing of this week’s episode, will definitely cover a lot of ground and be pretty intense. I should be less, uh, screaming? Next week too. I’m exhausted from spazzing every 10 seconds hah. Well, I just skimmed the manga again and there might be some but yeah I think I can calm down for maybe 2 weeks. maybe. take a wild guess who should show up right around that time. ANYWAY Thanks for reading see yall next weeeeekkkkk

[belongstorakimaiirisa]

OC interview - Arisa Bear-Tooth

Tagged by @avaleon

thank you ava ❤❤❤

So i kinda changed the wording and made an intro so its long 🤷‍♀️

Tagging @opal-bee @malwa1216 @malmalsass @@shadowtigers @tasharenecarna  @bosdansefanatic @danse-or-farkas @alexaberkeley

Rules

1. Choose an OC. 2. Answer them as that OC. 3. Tag 5  people to do the same. Doing as many as i want

The jingle of the inn keepers door bell caught Thorald’s attention and he looked up from his mead hopefully. A woman stood in the doorway, an unsure look on her face as she peered into the dimly lit inn. Remembering the description his employer gave, Thorald jumped to his feet and hurried to her, extending a hand in welcome.  "Are you the Dragonborn ?“ He asked and the woman nodded. "In the flesh”, she said cheerfully.

 He led her to the table he had occupied earlier and called for the serving girl to bring him two tankards of  mead.  Taking a deep swig of her drink, Arisa sighed happily, “It’s been awhile since I had some good mead. But let’s get to business..Why did you want to interview me?”  She asked. Thorald nodded, “You’re the dragonborn,  the one the Greybeards called for, m’lady. The people of Skyrim want to know more about you and my employer, The Black Horse courier,wants to be the one to tell your story. Please allow me to be the one to tell it”

Arisa looked down at her tankard for a moment then took a deep breath. “ Ok” She said, “But if your expecting tales of daring adventures and woes, you’re going to be disappointed..” He shook his head, “I just want your take on things, m’lady, Nothing more. ” She smiled at him and he noticed the amusement in her eyes. “You can call me Arisa,  m’lady is so formal.” she said.  He nodded slowly. “Ok then.. Arisa, let’s get started.” He pulled out a leather bound journal and pheasant quill out of his bag.  Placing them on the table, he readied himself to write.

1.“ What is your full name? ” Arisa  Laenhal Bear-Tooth.

2. “Do you know why you named that?” My father and mother fell in love with the name Arisa. Had I been a boy, my father would’ve given me a Nordic name, since I tend to look like my mothers race more. (Noting his confusion, she shrugged.) I am half nord/half mer. I  look like my mother more then my father, Tho there are some traits he passed along(she pulled  back her hair and Thorald noticed her pointed ears from her mer ancestry) . My middle name is in honor of my bosmer grandmother. I’ve never met her tho. She passed before my birth. As for my surname, my father insisted that I take my mothers. He said he didn’t want me to suffer the prejudice He faced, especially when dealing with my mothers people.

3. “Are you single or taken?” (Looking down at her mead, she sighed.) Single and I’m only interested in one person. And I don’t want discuss who it is. (The jingle of the door bell made them look to see who it was. A tall lean dark haired nord with black war paint around his eyes stood in the doorway. He  glanced at them briefly then walked to the bar, the innkeeper, Hulda, greeting him fondly. Thorald recognized him, one of the companion’s from Jorrvaskr. As he turned back to Arisa, he noted the blush on her cheeks. Could this be the person she was talking about earlier? Maybe this could be in a future story! He mentally rejoiced at the thought)

4. “Have any powers or abilities?” I can shout like the dragons. I good with destruction and restoration spells. And according to Eyorland Grey-mane, I’m not bad at working the forge.

5. (Taking a chance).“Stop being a Mary sue. Give me the details, Arisa. ” Might want to not ask me in that tone or consider the interveiw over. (He apologized, noting the hard look in her eyes and inwardly cringing. Don’t blow this,you idiot! You might never get another chance to ask her anything again, he thought)

6.,“Whats your eye color?”      Hazel blue

7. “Hair color? ”      Dark brown

8. “Have any family members? ”       My father, Rilgor Nightsky and my mother, Elena Bear-Tooth. I am an only child.

9.“ Oh, how bout pets?   I have my horse, Stepper.  He’s a very good horse, very reliable and runs like the wind when I need him too.

10. Moving on to something different, Are there things you don’t like?”

Giant spiders and draugr. Been poisoned and blown off my feet too many times

11. “Do you have any activities or hobbies you like to do?” Tinkering with the dwemer automatons I find, I also like to try to create new spells. My attempts have been a hit or miss so far.

12.“ Have you hurt anyone on purpose before? ” I’ve tried not to.

13. “Ever…killed anyone before? ”       Not if they didn’t deserve it.

14. “What kind of animal are you? ”       (She grinned and Thorald noticed that her canines seemed a bit longer then normal.) “What do you think?” (How bout we skip that question? He said hastily. He didn’t want to know)

15. “ Name your bad habits?” (She shrugged.)  Procrastinating is one thing I can think of. And blowing my money on things I enjoy. That normally wouldn’t be a problem but I tend  to overspend and then I find myself broke until the next job comes along..

16. “Do you look up to anyone at all?” I have great respect for my shield brothers and sisters of Jorrvaskr. I have learned a lot from them.

17. Are you gay, straight or bisexual? I enjoy men and women.

18. Do you go to school? I study with Vignar Grey-mane and Vilkas. They are teaching me the history of tamriel. Vilkas is also trying to teach me how to handle the transactions for the guild. (She frowns slightly) That’s not going so well to be honest.

19. “Do you ever want to be married and have children?” “I don’t know…I would like to get married but children? I’m hardly ever home so I’m not sure. I guess it just depends.

20. "Do you have any fanboys or girls? ”      I’m not sure.  I don’t think I do.

21. What are you most afraid of?      Hmmm.. I guess letting life pass me by…. And losing people who are precious to me.

22. “What do you usually wear?  Depends on the weather, but I prefer light clothing and armor.

23.whats one food that tempts you? Snowberry Crostata. Tilma makes the best but Huldas isn’t that bad either.

24. "Am I annoying to you? ” (Shrugs)  I’ve dealt with worse.

25. “Well, it’s not over.! ” (Another shrug)  it’s fine.

26.what class are you(low/middle/high?“ When I was with my parents, I was, considered middle. Living in Whiterun.. I guess you could say im still middle. I own Breezehome and im still able to provide for myself.

27. "How many friends do you have? ” Im friendly with the whiterun citizens and I can count on my shield brothers and sisters to back me up sooo quite a few.

28. “What are your thoughts on pie? ” The only pie sold in whiterun is apple and I am just not a fan of it. Sometimes Hulda will give me one for helping her cut firewood and I just give it to Farkas or Vilkas when I see  them.

29.Favorite drink?     It’s some brew Farkas made. He’s calls it the Sabrecat Stunner. It’s really strong but man, so good.  You can taste the sweetness of snowberries in it.

30.“Whats your favorite place?” Hmmm.. I have to say Jorvaskkr.  It’s noisy but there’s something comforting about it. Plus, Tilma is a great cook!

31. “Are you interested in anyone?”    (Sighs) yeah, but I don’t think he notices…

32.“Im sorry, that was a stupid question. ” It’s ok, I don’t mind.

33.Would you rather swim in a lake or an ocean? “ Lakes. Actually Lake illinata is one of my favorite places to camp at.

34. "What’s your type? ” Tall, dark haired, and they have to have  some more of interest in non battle related things.

35. “Any fetishes?“ Well, I like… Wait,.. I don’t think the people of Skyrim need to know THAT.

36. Camping or outdoors?       Both, you can’t camp without being outdoors..

Looking over his journal, Thorald nodded to himself. Everything looked ok and he would do a rewrite when he got back to Solitude. Rising up from his chair , he extended his hand and shook Arisa’s. "Thank you Dragonborn, I appreciate you allowing me to interview you” She nodded,  "No problem…it was interesting" She said. He flashed her a smile, “I’ll have the paper sent to breezehome as soon as im done.Well, I have to go but I wish you health and happiness on your journeys, my friend.”

[nyctimus]

Text symbols meme thing for Ivanpez and Talix and like lit anyone else you wanna do it for.

Set in MB:R verse!

IVANPEZ-

MORNING text.

8:03 am [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] Hi handsome! Don’t forget you promised to meet me for brunch at that cute little bistro on main, okay?! Can’t wait to see your pretty face! 🥰

text that WASN’T SENT.

9:30 pm [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] My mother has enough money to cover the slack for us if you just quit your job

RUSHED text.

4:45 pm [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] I’m SOOO sooo sorry I’m running late :((( Got stuck in the goddamn metroplex traffic, swear to god I’ll move to the wilderness and abandon the city completely one day. I’ll be there soon! Promise!

DRUNK text.

3:09 am [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] Move in with me wuit your job. I’ll quit mine. We can go somewhere nice like ...  3:12 am [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] Whefe? Where you what to go 3:13 am [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] Beach? We c an skinny dip every night 3:13 am [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] Hou can buiold a nice beach hut an I will make nice curtains for it, okay?

SUGGESTIVE text.

2:57 pm [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you insisted on wearing that skimpy little white tank to work in just to try and tempt me to tear it off of you. 

LATE NIGHT text.

1:15 am [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] Come here. I want cuddles, and my bed is nicer than yours

HATEFUL text.

5:44 pm [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] Peter. 5:44 pm [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] I don’t know what I’ve done to upset you, but I promise I’ll right it. 5:49 pm [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] What do you mean? Of course I have, why else would you have worn those atrocious, eye- searing shirts every day for the past WEEK if not to punish me? 5:51 pm [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] What? 5:51 pm [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] Don’t be ridiculous. Of course you’re punishing me. 5:52 pm [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] Still too angry to tell me what I’ve done, I see. Okay. I’ll try again later.

RANDOM text.

2:32 pm [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] Gold or indigo? I can’t decide.

SCARED text.

6:45 pm [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] Hey, I thought you’d be back by now? 7:02 pm [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] Pete? 7:13 pm [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] Peter??? Please pick up 7:26 pm [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] Baby please

LOVING text.

10:50 pm [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] Good night, sweet boy, I hope you have the very best dreams... I know you’re nervous about tomorrow, but you shouldn’t be... you’re perfect. 10:52 pm [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] You’ve got this. Now get some rest... don’t make me come over there 10:52 pm [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] Fine, then. See you soon

CURIOUS text.

3:13 pm [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] What are your favorite appetizers? Salty or sweet? Party hosting has become just a little more complicated since I started caring more about your opinion than my own. Feelings can be so pesky sometimes 😛

EXCITED text.

3:13 pm [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] Pete!  3:13 pm [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] Can you believe we’re leaving on our veeeery first vacation together as a couple together today? Even if it’s just a little two day getaway, I’m SO excited, I’ve been looking forward to this all week. 3:13 pm [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] Can’t wait to have you all to myself. You may be sick of me by the time this is over. Fair warning!

ACCIDENTAL text.

1:19 am [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] Oh, I don’t know. I think it’s entirely possible I’m just a way for him to pass a little time. And I’m fine with that. Obviously. Why wouldn’t I be?

HEARTBREAKING text.

1:19 am [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] Pete? 1:24 am [Kolya → Lyubimiy❤️] My mother just died. I.... I’m packing to head home to Paris now. Can you go with me?

/ / /

TALIX-

MORNING text.

5:25 am [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] I know you’re sleeping and won’t even see this for another 6 hours or so, but if you come give me a ride home I’ll smuggle you a whole loaf of that cinnamon coffee cake you like. Please

text that WASN’T SENT.

10:17 am [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] How do you do it? Live like that constantly? It was a ten minute experience two months ago but I’m still having nightmares

RUSHED text.

3:59 am [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] K, I know Ellis would probably throw the entire knife drawer at your face if you show back up here but there are SO many drunk assholes here right now it almost seems worth it to beg you to come save me

DRUNK text.

9:42 am [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] U just reality want you to hold me brighttnkw 9:42 am [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] Plea.Se. And pet my hair, Anne kiss my nose. Ok?

SUGGESTIVE text.

4:35 pm [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] I know this is fucked up, okay... 4:35 pm [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] And idk if it’s the full moon or what, but I can’t stop thinking about you with your gun when I’m getting off 4:35 pm [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] Your actual gun. Not your dick, love that one too but the one you... you know what I mean  4:35 pm [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] The way you hold it. Your fingers. Those fucking veins in your arms, Jesus Christ

LATE NIGHT text.

1:32 am [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] Are you okay? I know it’s silly to be afraid for you every single time the news mentions turf wars and casualties, but I worry about you. Text me when you can

HATEFUL text.

5:18 am [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] Swear to fuck next stuck up ass businessman that walks through these doors, orders coffee and then wrinkles his nose when he tastes it is getting the whole pot poured on his fancyboy suit. Why do people come here wanting Starbucks? I’m going to scream

RANDOM text.

7:30 pm [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] ...Pretty sure your kid is here staking me out right now. Not even subtle. Staring me down as I text this. Should I be concerned? Pretend I don’t know him? SOS

SCARED text.

4:06 pm [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] I think someone’s following me. I keep seeing the same car. At work, outside my apartment 4:07 pm [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] In the parking lot at Krogers. What should I do? 4:08 pm [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] I know if they see you it might make things worse but can you come get me? Please. I’m scared

LOVING text.

7:31 am [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] Hey, hot stuff. I’ll be dead to the world by the time you read this but I just wanted to tell you I hope you have a good day. Kick everyone’s ass. Don’t get arrested. 💖 xo

CURIOUS text.

9:22 pm [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] What do you have planned for Thanksgiving? My brother’s hounding me to bring you back to the farm. No pressure either way. He’s kind of a lot. I think he wants to shovel talk you, so... feel free to be busy, haha

EXCITED text.

5:48 pm [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] You know that cat I’ve been leaving canned tuna out for for like, the last month and a half? 5:48 pm [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] SHE CAME INSIDE 5:48 pm [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] And killed my favorite plant, but! SHE CAME INSIDE!!!

ACCIDENTAL text.

8:57 pm [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] I know you’re just worried about me, and I get that 8:57 pm [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] But you need to fuck off. It’s none of your business, man

HEARTBREAKING text.

6:22 am [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] I know I’m being an asshole doing this over text 6:22 am [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] But I’ve been trying for weeks to say it in person, and I just can’t. I look at you and it wipes everything else out of my brain 6:22 am [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] I don’t know how to commit to a guy with a kid. 6:22 am [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] And I know you warned me, first thing, and I know I’m being horribly selfish 6:22 am [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] I just. I guess I’m looking for something else. 6:22 am [Felix → Sweet Po-Tate-o 🍠] I’m sorry.

/ / /

DONNY/GRAHAM-

MORNING text.

7:37 am [Graham → bitchboy] it’s cold, jackass. if you’re gonna fucking leave me here to freeze by myself you could at least turn up the heat wtf 7:37 am [Graham → bitchboy] inconsiderate motherfucker

text that WASN’T SENT.

7:36 am [Graham → bitchboy] please come back, i dont sleep as well without you

RUSHED text.

6:44 pm [Graham → bitchboy] fucking setup? target expecting me so find your leak

DRUNK text & ACCIDENTAL text.

2:57 am [Graham → bitchboy] i wasfn EXPECTING him, tyler 2:57 am [Graham → bitchboy] i mean everypnoes heard of him. what an asshole he is. cause he is. but hes this asshole who owns a TEDDY BEAR 2:59 am [Graham → bitchboy] of course you won’t believe nme but im not lyin i swear it on my mams grave 3:02 am [Graham → bitchboy] and its not his sons. its his. its so cute. hes cyte. ill stab your duck if you tell anyone 3:03 am [Graham → bitchboy] duck 3:03 am [Graham → bitchboy] duck 3:03 am [Graham → bitchboy] y ouknow.  3:04 am [Graham → bitchboy] god. 3:04 am [Graham → bitchboy] its’ terinle

SUGGESTIVE text & EXCITED text.

11:52 pm [Graham → bitchboy] finally finished up here. 11:52 pm [Graham → bitchboy] eta 47 mins, have your office clear and my reward ready ;)

LATE NIGHT text.

12:02 am [Graham → bitchboy] sometimes i feel like you’re intentionally giving me the lamest possible fucking targets. wtf. i like killing bitches that will stab me back, not pushing pathetic ass grannies down the stairs while her 50 cats watch me? im picking my own files from here on out 12:03 am [Graham → bitchboy] and im bringing the cats 12:03 am [Graham → bitchboy] maybe youll think twice before pulling this shit on me again

HATEFUL text.

6:26 pm [Graham → bitchboy] you sign my paychecks. thats it. you dont get to tell me what to do outside of that. dont get it twisted just because were fucking, asshole

RANDOM text.

8:32 pm [Graham → bitchboy] idc what we do for dinner but i really want cheesecake so

CURIOUS text.

4:30 am [Graham → bitchboy] idk what you and dj usually do for holidays. should i head out? i can crash at my old room at tys, i dont mind

SCARED text & LOVING text & HEARTBREAKING text.

4:29 am [Graham → bitchboy] idk, got me good thus time. pulling over. behind sunoco on 35. dont wnna crash but you should send someone to gt rid of the folders if not my body too by rhen. too much evidence sorry 4:30 am [Graham → bitchboy] im really sorry 4:30 am [Graham → bitchboy] i love you. sorry for not telling you until now . sorry. im so sorry

[survivor-kuwait]

Episode 3 - "I can feel my fangs coming in...tail growing...literally about to snake someone tonight and idk who it should be." - Owen

Out of all the people to take out 9-1.... you take out Beastman? Like when Nehemiah- THE PERSON WHO WAS ALREADY VOTED OUT- was there? Like what kind of fucking logic is that? Seriously, had you all used your heads and actually THINK- that should've been the 9-1 vote... Not for Beastman. Literally livid right now, and while I love the immunity of the safe zone, I do not want to tempt fate and throw this next challenge. I am here for myself, and any agenda that I have of wanting this asshole of a player gone- needs to wait or I need to have others do it for me. Praying that it is the latter over the former.

Well, I’m sad that Matt B. Was voted out. I felt that I could have worked with him in the game. Now there is still 10 complete signs and Nehe (Pisces) in the game. We need to win the oasis atleast so we can talk to people because not being able to communicate with anyone else is really gunna hurt us. I rather be in the oasis than warzone. This next immunity looks like we have a chance to win but it is gunna be lucked bases and if anyone wants us to be in the warzone. Hopefully no one does and we can slip into the top 5 now? and hopefully top 3.

Matt will never read this but it's okay, I wanted to type out my reasoning as to why I was chill with him being voted out. 1. I'm trying to play a game that's a little more selfish and a little less selfless to see if I can catch lightning in a bottle and get a TS win. 2. I really liked Matt and had things gone differently I would have been all about a long term alliance, that being said if I'm going to work with someone I need them to be able to keep their name off the unanimous block. He didn't talk to anyone at all til it was too late. I need an ally that if I things gets sticky for me then they need to he able to have pull to help me out of it. 3. This is a long game and we only have quick snippets of time to make connections and I'm not about to throw my vote to spare someone's feelings and get 8 other people start to think I'm swishy washy. They need to believe they can call upon me if they need to. Sorry about the 9-1 vote, but it's a game and we have a long way left to go.

Only remaining Matt! And boy do I feel powerful. However, I feel worse than ever regarding the challenge, it’s just extremely complex and it requires myself and Adrien to put a lot more effort than we are putting in. It’s hard because with only two people there’s no one else to rely on but ourselves, and honestly it’s consistently easier just to defect to him so at least something gets done.

I am getting really worried. My partner hasnt been on today and hasnt really help with the challenge. Im sooo worried that we are going to lose. I was just meh about it so i dont even fucken know if the list will be good and the target list is like my own thoughts even if i told Renee it was random.orged. I just wish no one wants to target us and we are atleast in top 5. 

Well we lost immunity. It sucks. But I get to talk to Madison again and also Stephen which is good because I can try and like solidify something with them. Timmy is here too so I can try and work with him but we do have org history with each other. I just hope Renee and I arent targeted this round.

Most likely gonna stick with doodle and nehe this round, it was either nip that alliance immediately or ride it till its time to flip, flipping now would just antagonise everyone.

I feel like I’m doing well socially but thats on my side. I dont know how people are perceive me. 🤷‍♂️ I hope that I’ll be good for tonight. Timmy and I talked last night and it was really good. It was more of life than game. I enjoyed it. I really want to work with Timmy, hopefully its mutual.

Narrowly avoided tribal this round, probably thanks to Cancer and Virgo making their entire list for the challenge "do nothing". I'm not sure if they threw it on purpose or if that was some type of strategy to keep signs from being mad at them, either way it's a damn challenge, people can get over it. Especially when you can target a sign that has consistently been on the top on challenges in Capricorn. I don't care, I'm not going to tribal, in other news, I landed another hit in battleshits. I need to get that ship sunk before someone else happens to find it as well, if I can grab another advantage that's one more someone else can't use against me.

I want to get Stevie out. I don’t think it’s going to happen but i want to try. I would go for Owen but people tend to tell Owen things if he name is mentioned because he just has that personality. I don’t think Stevie would have those connections and it would be nice to limit that tribe since they went to the Oasis twice already (I think that’s what it’s called). I just need to look back to see if he is already the weak link on the tribe because then it might be better to keep him but honestly I’d still rather see him go. So I’ll try to get people on board for some plan.

I uh threw out a name out to Timmy. I really feel like we can actually work together in this game my target as of now is Stevie. He’s really nice person but havent really talked to him outside of the warzone chat. Timmy had the same idea so hopefully it could be an easy vote tonight. Timmy seems on board so he could get his partner Trace. Doodle amd Stephen want to work with me and Renee so we’ll have their votes too. I need to talk to madison but hopefully they would want to do Stevie too. Leaving both Capricorns on the outs which sucks cuz i like Owen.

This vote is getting closer and closer. I’m slightly getting more nervous. Its being very calm and quiet again. Stevie is still the target for me so we’ll see how that goes. I’m just worried that there would be messy scrambling the last hr or 30 minutes that would switch targets but right now it feels like Timmy is on board for Stevie and hopefully Stephen would be too.

for the first time, I spend the day in the Oasis. Winning 3rd place is a blessing and for it to be on this challenge, an even bigger one (not seen as a comp threat, can pretend we tried to flop but not make it obvious to the Pact). I am glad that I get to socialize with Willow a bit again. And hopefully I can socialize w Matt and Adrian a bit too. Cullan is lowkey dry and idk if he likes me at all but idk why he wouldn't. Tonight, the people I like are facing tribal council. Owen, Madison and Jacob cannot go home but Renee could! I hope some miracle pulls through and that b*tch is sent packing. I did not come for her in any way shape or form in immunity bc I want to be able to disingenuously rebuild w her if we make it onto the same tribe or we both make it to merge. Renee's ass did NOTHING BUT GRAB AND SRATCH ME HOWEVER. FUCKING BITHCHCISOAFHISHFSKLHGSHGKLS I DIDN'T EVEN LOOK UNTIL NOW. I HOPE OWEN LOOKED AT RESULTS AND IS ON THE SAME WAVELENGTHS AND GETS THAT BITCH OUTTA HERE.  Kait and Thomas also grabbed/scratched but nowhere near as much as Renee's dumbass did. She's an idiot, she has no game. I'm getting her ass out the fucking second I have a chance. Does she not remember how easy it was to get rid of her the moment I wanted to in Kanto? forget you, go home, goodbye! I mean, this is embarrassing. You threw every wrench you could at me yet still I am top 3 and I do nothing to you and still you are in the bottom 6. anyway, prayer circle for renee to go back to the fissure where she came from.

....

Okay soooo i did something bad LMAO I told Nehe I wanted to work with him and then I told madison/Jacob I wanted to work with them and then I told Timmy/trace I wanted to work with them hehe so my plan was to vote Stephen/Taylor or maybe go for renee but..... Nehe wants to vote anyone BUT Stephen taylor/ and madison+trace both don’t want to do maynor/renee.... fuck my life 

So basically I have to either turn on Nehe which would kinda suck or somehow convince madison and jacob to do renee or maynor but I feel like they might even go for Nehe and ughhh how did I put myself between this ALREADY My horoscope was right I am dying today

...

I can feel my fangs coming in...tail growing...literally about to snake someone tonight and Idk who it should be. I THINK that right now it’s: Timmy/Trace/Madison going for Taylor, Nehe/Stephen/Taylor going for Renee, Maynor going for Stevie. I have no clue what renee and jacob want. Theoretically if stevie and I vote for renee it could be 5-4-2 if renee did stevie but I also think that madison could try to get renee to do taylor.... ugh. I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to lie to Nehe, he was the one who told me that Maynor wanted Stevie out. But I can’t screw over madison/Jacob/Trace/Timmy.... Maybe I could vote renee but Stevie could vote taylor,???? And then I tell madison and jacob that Stevie did renee? But I tell Nehe that I did renee??? Idk this is all just too complicated and some people like Stevie and jacob won’t ANSWR ME

Jshdia I am dying how messy this vote is getting. The names that have been thrown out are Renee, Doodle, Stephen, and Stevie. Hopefully we can have the votes stay on Stevie but im worried about Renee. I just hope Im safe tbh. It is a single games after all.

...

I am dying right now. Its either gunna be doodle or stevie tonight. Me and Renee are hearing mix signals. Ugh I just hope it isnt me or Renee going. It would totally suck if i leave and it would be bad if Renee left. Its gunna be a crazy tribal thats for sure.

Ok so today has been interesting. It's been such a back and forth between Taylor and Stevie going but at this point it's going to be Taylor. I know I said I wanted Stevie earlier, but honestly it's not me going so I don't care too much tbh. Stevie's name has already gone around once now so it's not going to be too difficult to bring it up again in the future. I'm just hoping for a twist tonight honestly. Something needs to change about this game.

Ooo i dont know if anyone caught that in the warzone chat but Stevie posted he was pushing for Taylor then removed it. I was dying if this was an accident. 😂 but im just crossing my fingers that its Stevie tonight. Doodle seems like they wants to work with me so I want to keep them around.

I ACTUALLY CANNOT HANDLE THIS RN DSAKFJHFSKJD UIGHHHHHHHHHHHH okay so madison tells me jacob and timmy want stevie out and then shes like "wait maybe not" and im like ok and she's like "taylor it is" NNNN OK SO FUCK JACOB AND TIMMY FOR CONSIDERING STEVIE BEHIND MY BACK?????? now I feel extra bad for betraying nehe... but stevie wants to do taylor 100% and renee is seeming to do taylor too? idk if I should just vote taylor and do damage control with nehe/stephen or ifi  should vote renee and try to pin it on stevie idek anymore. im worried ppl are being sketch with me and voting me??? but I think if they were votin for me they wouldnt be trying to tell madison stevie or taylor or all this. and idk if taylor/stephen are rlly doing renee like nehe says....or if theyre doing stevie with maynor???? ugh idk. and renee I have no clue about this is just too much but whatever ill make up my mind when tribal comes and pray it isnt me

The Oasis was nice as a change of pace from the warzone definitely!! Sad I missed the movie tho

one good thing about the warzone.... i dont have to deal with nehe yelling at me tonight

I had a really good time at Oasis! It feels good to succeed at something and I’m glad I got to talk to new people, but it also really reminded me that there is so much game left to be played and so many new alliances that need to be made. Thor Ragnarok was good but I was literally waiting for Chris Hemsworth to yell an idol clue or something... and now there’s a swap so I can shit my pants about that

...

Pants have been shat. This war zone thing AND being on a tribe with any of the 3 people I’ve talked to is freaking me out like sauerkraut. I just gotta keep showing up enough for these challenges!

Haha i am dying. Both times o switched my target. This one tho might have not beed good but i think it was because me being able to adapt is part of this game and willing to sacrifce someone is 🤷‍♂️. Now lets hope i can get something out of this search i have hit 3 slots with tonight at 11:11pm will be my 4th hit. Cross your fingers for me. This swap is good and bad. But i just need to stay away from the bottom 5.

Lmfao. I swap with the one person that i don't want to associate myself with, like at all. which means that my road to getting 15th is already settled. which i literally hate because i do not want to do anything with Nehe and he has the audacity of messaging me: "we good or nah?" like.... you do the fucking math. you screwed me over and you ask that? like ofc we're not good. like im gonna make it my mission to screw you and your allies that you have made over the course of the past 4 rounds. you are a fucking little snake and im here with a vendetta. and that is to get you OUT!

Honestly Nehemiah is so full of shit. Him telling me the move is Renee when he knows there are no numbers there. I want his ass OUT

[horansqueen]

AM Conversations : chapter 11

A Niall Horan fanfiction ; rated MA

CHAPTER 1 || CHAPTER 2 || CHAPTER 3 || CHAPTER 4 || CHAPTER 5 || CHAPTER 6 || CHAPTER 7 || CHAPTER 8 || CHAPTER 9 || CHAPTER 10

NOTES:

-one chapter is her pov, the next is his. -4.2k. -im sorry, i never proofread, i hate it. -there WILL be smut. but not only smut. -this is a romance, comedy, smut story. -for the summary, check my MASTERLIST.

- IF YOU WANT TO BE NOTIFIED WHEN THIS IS UPDATED, I THOUGHT I COULD START A TAG LIST SO LET ME KNOW. IF YOU’D RATHER BE NOTICED IN PRIVATE, MESSAGE ME TOO PLEASE!

- there will be smut added soon, just thought i’d give a fair warning!

- i’m having a hard time finding 2015 Niall gifs so i may add 2016 gifs instead. if you want to propose me any PLEASE message me. youll make my day!

- thanks to all of you who answer my questions about this story (like who you ship her with and such) it means the world to me!

-please, message me, give me feedbacks, it would mean sooo much to me!

Chapter 11 : Her chapter

OLIVIA

I couldn't help but glance at Niall a few times as he was leaving. To get my attention, Harry grabbed one of my hands and I felt his fingers press against the fabric of Niall's shirt that I was wearing, since I held the bottom of the sleeves tight in my fists. Without thinking, I squeezed his fingers back and looked up in his eyes. I could feel my heartbeats get back to a normal speed now that Niall was gone and it made me feel guilty. Was it normal that my heart was racing when my best friend was so close to me but that nervousness would leave my body when Harry was around?

"Did I interrupt?" he asked in a low tone, his eyes roaming on my face as I shook my head slowly from let to right. "Okay, can I show you something?"

I frowned but nodded, this time, and he pulled on my hand, bringing me further than I had gone earlier. We followed a small path and finally ended on a shore. I let my gaze travel on the lake as the moon reflected on the water and turned to Harry who sent me a small smile. It was pretty, he was handsome, and I couldn't help but think about how lucky I was.

"It was pretty when I came here earlier but I didn't know it'd be even better at night."

He let go of my hand and sat down, looking up at me and raising his eyebrows.

"If you're scared to stain your clothes or something, you can always sit on me."

I tilted my head and chuckled despite myself. His offer was tempting but I was not sure it was a good idea. In fact, I didn't know what I wanted anymore and it was a bit troubling. I just had a moment with Niall and the thought of how close his face was to mine was making me shiver. If I didn't know better, I could have sworn he was about to kiss me. I shook my head slightly at the thought and sighed again. Of course he was not going to kiss me, but for half a second there, it felt like we were more than just best friends.

"So? What's it gonna be?"

I blinked a few times and chuckled again before sitting down next to him, bringing my knees up and wrapping my arms around them. I kept looking at the lake but I could feel his eyes on me, burning the side of my face, and I finally turned around to send him a fond smile.

"You were checking the stars, weren't you?" he asked gently as I looked up at the dark sky. "Alone in the woods?"

Night was my favorite moment of the day. Everything was peaceful, quiet, and dark. So dark that the trees almost looked black. It always made something stir inside me and I had no idea why.

"I do." I confessed with a nod, breathing in the fresh air of the night. "I don't know why, i guess I find that fascinating."

After a few seconds of silence, I frowned and turned back to him, tilting my head.

"How did you know?"

He dived his eyes in mine and sighed low, turning his body my way and crossing his legs. I loved the way his body moved. It always seemed smooth, controlled and laid-back. I envied him and at the same time, I wanted to be close to him.

"Is it creepy if I say that I just enjoy looking at you?"

The thought made me hold my breath as I stared at him and after a while, I smiled more.

"Maybe a bit, but it's more endearing than creepy, so it's all cool."

He laughed and I did too before silence came back between us. It was not awkward but it still wasn't as easy as it was when I was with Niall. Still, It seemed unfair to compare since I had known Niall for so long I felt like he was a part of me, and I was a part of him. I hated myself for even thinking about my best friend at a moment like this but I couldn't help it. I got out of my thoughts when I heard Harry's soft voice again.

"Can I ask you something?" he let out in a serious tone. "And I really want a straight answer."

I held my breath and swallowed hard. This was the kind of demand that made my heart skip a few beats. I knew his question was going to be hard to answer, or really deep, and suddenly, I was scared it would involve my feelings, particularly the ones I have for Niall. I was not ready to tell anyone that I was in love with my best friend as I barely admitted it to myself and I knew i'd have to lie to Harry if he was to ask me about that.

"Is it about us?"

His lips curled slightly and he chuckled, glancing down at his hands. I did the same and noticed he was playing with one of his rings, making me wonder if he was nervous or just annoyed.

"It is, actually."

I waited a few seconds for him to look back at me but it felt like an hour. My heart was racing again and I tried to swallow the lump in my throat. I had to keep my cool but it was not easy and I felt like he was trying to find the right words.

"Look, i'm normally not insecure like this but, do you really like me, Liv?"

I wanted to laugh and my lips curled but when I realized how serious he was, I frowned. Harry Styles was asking me if I liked it again. I remember he asked me before, in the middle of the night, when we slept at Niall's. I blamed the alcohol but this time, Harry was definitely sober and I had no idea why he needed reassurance again.

"I told you, Harry." I pointed out. "Everyone likes you."

"I don't care about other people, Olivia. I want to know if you like me."

The tone of his voice surprised me and I bit my bottom lip harder than I intended. He didn't seem pissed or nervous. He seemed sad and confused.

"I mean, I know it means nothing but I feel like you're avoiding me." he continued without waiting for my answer, as if he needed to justify himself. "If you don't want to be with me, I'll understand you know. You can just say it and I won't be mad or hold grudges or anything."

I was so surprised by his short monologue that my lips parted slightly. Harry didn't give me the vibe of someone who was insecure at all. Perhaps it was just a facade but Harry was a confident and cheeky person, and hearing him say that to a nobody like me almost felt fake. I brought one of my hands on his arm and squeezed it gently.

"I really like you, Harry." I admitted again. "I really fucking like you. I do."

We remained silent as the palm of my hand warmed the skin of his arm and I licked my lips, bringing attention to them and making his gaze drop to my mouth.

"I'm not avoiding you." I whispered, trying to remain motionless. "I would never... I mean..."

I wanted to tell him that I was no one, that he should go for someone like Maya or a girl like her. I wanted to tell him he'd be judged if pictures of us hand in hand appeared online and that everyone would question him. I wanted to tell him to really think about it before to jump into something with an average girl like me. Instead, I moved closer and licked my lips again. My heart started to race at the thought of finally kissing him after months of ridiculous and non-subtle flirting and it made me happy. I could feel butterflies spreading inside me and I almost laughed at the absurd cliché.

"You're gonna kiss me, aren't you?" he asked in a breath when my mouth was only a few inches away from his.

I felt my lips curl slightly and I nodded.

"Yea, I think it's time, don't you think?" i replied just as low.

A large but fond smile spread on his lips slowly and I could feel my cheeks on my fire before realizing that it was my whole body that felt like it was burning. I was excited and nervous, my whole body was throbbing and there was nothing I wanted more at that exact moment.

"It's definitely time."

I knew we should have kissed days ago... weeks, maybe.  That didn't mean we would be official, that didn't mean we admitted to any feeling and obviously, it didn't mean that I had stopped loving Niall. All it meant was that we both wanted to kiss each other desperately and because of the long wait and building up, I knew it was not going to be disappointing.

When I felt my lips brush against his, my eyes fluttered close. He smelled good, extremely good, actually, and I felt his breath hit my skin gently. It made a small shiver run in my back.

"Guys! It's movie time!"

I felt like my heart was going to jump out of my throat when I heard a voice and backed away, letting Harry's arm go for a reason I ignored. Did I not want anyone to see Harry and I's first kiss? Or was it just the surprise? Harry didn't move back, he simply breathed in really deeply and sighed loud, his eyes still closed.

"Seriously, Liam?"

I had rarely seen Harry pissed but I could tell he was, this time. I turned to the newcomer and sent him an annoyed smile as he frowned for a few seconds and finally grimaced.

"Oh shit, is this a bad time?"

I could feel the eagerness and desire slowly leave my body and I sighed, slowly getting up and brushing my hands on my pants to take off the sand. Harry was still sitting and I extended my hand to him to help him up.

"Come on, let's go watch a movie."

Eventually, he opened his eyes and put his hand in mine as I pulled on it. We looked at each other for a few seconds in silence and I could feel the disappointment we both shared linger around.

"I'll... wait for you guys in the living room."

I realized Harry was still holding my hand when he pressed his fingers on mine and I sent him a sorry smile. The moment was gone and I was pretty sure he felt it too. Something clearly didn't want Harry and I to kiss and it was starting to bother more than I wanted to show. I licked my lips and took a step back, pulling him with me and reluctantly, he followed me.

We entered the living room and I let go of his hand to go take a seat on the couch and Harry joined me, sitting next to me slowly. I could feel his thigh pressed against mine and my eyes dropped to his lap. Was all of this a sign that I shouldn't be with him? This thought made me roll my eyes at how stupid I was for even having this cross my mind and I looked up, meeting Julie's gaze. She grimaced and I saw her mouth a clear 'I'm sorry', making me smile sincerely and shake my head a bit. I was not really mad at Liam, I knew he didn't do it on purpose, I was just impatient to find out where this thing I had with Harry, whatever it was, would lead me.

My eyes traveled on the room and landed on Niall, who seemed to be very concentrated on the movie while I didn't even know the title. He rubbed his eyes and I swallowed hard when my heart jumped in my chest, realizing Maya was sitting next to him, her head laying on his shoulder. He didn't seem to give her any attention but I still felt extremely jealous and sad to see the scene in front of me and I quickly looked away, trying to get back to my senses.

"What's this movie?" Harry whispered so close to me that I could feel his breath on my cheek.

I turned to him and smiled at the proximity of his face, my gaze dropping on his lips. Could I just kiss him right here and right now, in front of everyone?

"It's a stupid comedy, I think Niall picked it." I breathed, making him smile more.

We stared at each other for a few seconds and I finally breathed in, bringing my legs over his lap and moving my body closer to his. His eyebrows raised in surprise for half a second but he quickly smiled again and brought his hands over my legs. I could feel the warmth of his hands cross the fabric of my pants over my thighs and it was impossible to focus on the movie. Slowly, I brought my hand over his and ran my thumb gently on his skin. There was something about what had happened between us near the lake that made me want to take a chance with Harry. I didn't want to let my doubts make me believe that fate or whatever else was sending me a sign that this was not a good idea.

When I finally turned to look at Harry, he sent me a fond smile that I quickly sent back. He didn't seem as nervous or conflicted as he was an hour earlier and I liked it because I hated knowing he wasn't sure about my feelings. If I wanted to be honest, i knew that what I felt for Harry was more than friendship. The real problem was that it seemed like my feelings for Niall were even stronger.

I didn't follow the movie at all but when it ended, everyone got up, stretching and yawning and I did the same. Turning around, I tilted my head to smile at Harry again.

"So, goodnight, and thank you for earlier."

I held my breath as he studied me and he finally licked his lips, nodding.

"Goodnight, Liv." he let out, his voice giving me a quiver again.

He brought one his hands closer to my face and pushed a lock of my hair behind my ear, making my lips curl even more. I brought my hand to his and dared to turn my head slightly, kissing softly the palm of his hand before squeezing it in mine and taking a step back.

"I'll see you tomorrow."

He didn't answer but I walked away and when I was about to reach the hall, I turned around and saw him staring at me. It made me chuckle shyly and I waved quickly, disappearing in the hall. It's only when I closed the door behind myself and locked it that I sighed, realizing I had been holding my breath.

I heard the shower running from the adjacent bathroom and I quickly searched through Niall's bags to find sweatpants and a t-shirt. I didn't want to wear own clothes and I really needed to decompress. For some reason, I knew spending some time with my best friend would help and I lied down in bed, over the covers, staring at the ceiling until he came back in the room.

"Missy, those are my sweatpants, and that's my shirt."

I moved my head up to look at him and sent him a smirk.

"Dang, Nee, you're smart." I joked with a chuckle. "Sherlock Holmes' got nothing on you."

He flipped me off, making me laugh again and I didn't know if I was disappointed or not that he had dressed in the bathroom. It reminded me of him in the pool and I held my breath. Being able to feel at ease around him even while I imagined him almost naked and wet was something I couldn't understand but the opposite would be horrible.

He took place next to me on the bed, his hands behind his head, and I turned my face to look at him. Was I allowed to ask him questions about Maya or would it blow my cover? And If I did, would he end up asking me about Harry?

"So, how was that kiss?"

His question made my heart jump up my throat and I swallowed hard, sending him a frown.

"We didn't kiss." I explained with a shrug as if it didn't bother me. "Liam cockblocked us."

I saw Niall's lips curl and I knew he was amused. He burst into laughter as I rolled my eyes, a smile on my lips.

"I'm not surprised." Niall admitted, still laughing, his cheeks turning a soft shade of red. "That's a total Liam move!"

I turned my head again to look up at the ceiling. I could see lights shining on it, coming from outside and my smile faded.

"What about the kiss you shared with Maya?"

I didn't want to look at him so I kept looking up but I could feel my heart thump hard inside my chest. I was so scared he was going to tell me he enjoyed it. I was so scared he was going to admit he had feelings for her, that he wanted to be with her... And I felt so fucking guilty for that because I was so close to be with Harry and I couldn't expect my best friend to remain single forever.

"The kiss I shared with Maya?" he repeated my words in a lower tone. "Oh! At dinner? It was nothing."

From the corner of my eyes, I noticed him turn his head to look at me but I kept looking at the ceiling until he explained more. I didn't want to seem eager or show him that it affected me but it did. It affected me way more than I thought it would.

"I mean, she didn't want to eat pastas since she's got a photoshoot in a few days, so I told her to get something else from the kitchen and she just, randomly kissed me."

I held my breath, suddenly remembering all I ate at dinner and I felt guilty. Of course, someone like Maya didn't eat pastas, and that thought made me suddenly extremely self-conscious.

"She probably just wanted to thank me." he shrugged, glancing at me again. "I don't know, maybe she likes me."

I chuckled and rolled my eyes, turning to him without thinking and when our eyes met, I sighed low.

"Of course she likes you, Niall."

I didn't want Maya to like him, and I didn't want him to reciprocate the feelings. I didn't want my best friend to date someone as perfect as Maya was when I was completely in love with him. I knew I could never compete with a girl like her and I suddenly felt nauseous and on the verge of tears.

"Mm, yea, she asked me if you could switch room and go sleep with Harry."

My lips parted, my eyes still glued to his, and I was scared he was going to ask me to do it. I could feel my eyes start to water and It seemed like I forgot how to breathe.

"Do you want me to switch room?" I asked so low I barely heard myself.

"Do you want to share a room with Harry?" he asked immediately after.

"I.."

We stared at each other and I was surprised he didn't notice I was dying inside. How could he not read the pain in my eyes?

"Okay, how about we are honest with each other?" he proposed after about a minute of silence.

He turned his whole body my way and raised his eyebrows, waiting for me to do the same. I nodded and turned my body too so we were both facing each other, waiting in silence.

"We'll both answer truthfully at the same time. On three, okay?" I nodded quickly and licked my lips. "Do you want to switch room? One, two, three."

I felt my eyes flutter, ready to close, but I forced myself to keep them open as my heartbeats accelerated.

"No." I whispered as his own "No!" echoed on the wall, assured and loud.

Every single ounce of stress suddenly disappeared and I swallowed, feeling better. He smiled fondly and I did too, reaching between us to grab my hand. I couldn't remember the last time I got so many hand squeeze in such a short period of time but I smiled and held his hand tighter.

"I just wasn't sure if you preferred to share a room with Harry but personally, I don't want to share a room with Maya. You know I just want to share a room with you." He made a pause and shrugged again. "Frankly, I don't know how to tell her i'm not interested."

Once again, the surprise could be read all over my face and it made him chuckle.

"I mean, why? Maya is... perfect!" I pointed out, feeling suddenly stupid for praising my rival but making Niall laugh again.

"Oh she's gorgeous, and smart, and kind." he let out as I grimaced. "I don't know, I just don't have feelings for her, I guess."

I let my eyes run on his face, feeling a strong relief that I couldn't explain as I listened to him talk. He was so fucking pretty and I started hating myself again when I realized I wanted to kiss him more than I wanted to kiss Harry.

I wanted to bring my hand to his cheek and kiss him. I wanted to press my body against his, run my fingers in his hair, hear him whimper in my mouth... I wanted to be the one he wanted, the one he loved... What was I thinking? If someone like Maya couldn't catch his attention, why did I even allow myself to hope for it?

"So, now that this is settled, you know i'm gonna ask..." I frowned but he was smirking and I got scared for half a second. "Who made you so horny earlier?"

I chuckled and shook my head, rubbing my eyes as exhaustion was quickly catching up with me. I let out a yawn and whimpered low, getting back on my back to stare at the ceiling again.

"Nuh-uh, I'll never tell you."

I turned to look at him as he sat up and I raised my eyebrows, making him smile more.

"No? Then maybe i'm gonna have to tickle it out of you."

I didn't have time to answer as he jumped on top of me, his fingers finding my waist quickly. I let out a short scream and one of his hands reached for my mouth, pressing against my lips to keep me quiet as he kept tickling me with the other. I squirmed roughly, trying to push him away as I tried to beg him to stop. He did after a few seconds and moved his face closer to mine with a cheeky smile.

"I'm sorry darling, did you try to tell me something?"

I was trying to catch my breath and he took his hand away. My lips parted and I swallowed, trying not to think of his body against mine.

"Please, stop." I begged, making his grin bigger.

"Are you gonna tell me who made you horny?"

"If you tell me all the details of that dream you had."

His smile faltered a bit and he seemed to think. After about a minute, he moved away to lay down in bed with me again and I turned to him, sending him a curious look.

"Some things are better left unsaid." he pointed out with a chuckle, wiggling on the bed and pulling on the covers to get under.

I couldn't help but think that one of the things that should always be kept a secret was how I felt for him. No one could find out, especially not him, and I had to keep it to myself until i'd die, or else, i'd lose him, I knew it. I could feel it.

I moved under the covers too and turned to him to send him a sad smile.

"'Night, Niall."

He opened his eyes again to look at me fondly and it made my heart twist in my chest. Fuck, I wish I didn't love him that bad.

"Good night, petal." he whispered. "Sweet dreams."

I held my breath and kept staring at him as he fell asleep. I always felt overwhelmed when he used cute nicknames with me, even though I knew he did it with everyone. I fought against slumber to stare at him as long as I could but eventually, I fell asleep, hoping he'd still be there when i'd wake up.